#it doesn't mean I'm not fucking sad as shit)
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How I think the jjk characters would comfort you after a break up !!
Includes: Satoru, Nobara, Yuji, and Megumi.
(Hurt/comfort, mentions of break ups (obviously) murder and vandalism (jokingly), might be ooc, written with fem! reader in mind but anyone can read!! Please ignore any grammar/spelling mistakes, I accidentally posted this twice...!..!.!!! So fixing it was a little difficult so ignore it if any paragraphs are merged......)
Satoru Gojo:
You've been isolating yourself in your dorm for about three days now.
The guy you've been dating just dumped you and you've been devastated since.
Of course, Satoru, Shoko, Nanami, even Yaga have reached out and tried to comfort you, but you brushed it off with a muttered “I'm fine.”, being sure to shut the door in each of their faces before they could say anything more.
But you weren't fine. Of course you weren't.
You were so in love with your ex. He was your entire world and he just left like you were nothing.
You've spent the last three days crying, sleeping, and rereading old texts.
You probably looked like shit, but you couldn't care less. What was the point in trying to look or act decent now that he was gone?
You're forced to pull yourself out of your thoughts once you get a knock at your door.
You groan, you really, really don't wanna talk to anyone, but you force yourself to get up.
You open the door and before you can even get out a full “What do you want?”, Satoru shoves past you into your room with a shit-ton of snacks.
“Did you really think I was gonna let my favorite person stay isolated and wallow in their sadness forever?” He asks, giving you a teasing grin.
You can't help the chuckle that escapes your lips.
“What's all that for?” You ask, pointing to the snacks that were now covering the entirety of your bed.
“Movie night!! We're gonna watch a bunch of movies and eat a bunch of snacks and stay up all night until you stop being all mopey!” He exclaims, and you feel an excitement replicating his bubbling up in your stomach.
“If your big ass doesn't eat all the snacks...” You mutter back with a sly grin as you get into your bed, sitting beside him.
He immediately puts his hand over his heart and squeezes his shirt with a look of faux offence.
“What!? And to think I went out of my way to be all nice to you after your dick-head boyfriend dumped you!” He whines, crossing his arms to look more angry.
This only pulls laughter out of you. His face immediately softens, it feels much better to see your pretty smile than your depressed frown.
He pulls you into an unexpected hug, and once you process it, you hug him back.
“I can hollow purple him if you want.” He says, muttering the words softly against your hair in order to keep the moment quiet.
“That's not happening and you know it.” You whisper back. Suddenly, this break up isn't seeming so bad.
Maybe you just need Satoru and your other friends, and you'll be better in now time.
Nobara Kugisaki:
Ever since you found out that your boyfriend was cheating on you, you've been visibly down in the dumps.
Right now, Nobara is the only one who knows since she helped you catch him.
“I just can't believe him. All that time together and he fucking cheats.” You groan before looking up at Nobara, who's currently going through your closet to help you pick what you need to throw out and what you need to keep since you've got way too much clothes.
“Yeah, he's a total moron. Keep or no?” She asks before lifting up one of your shirts.
“You can throw that out. And with my best friend too? No offense to you, of course, but seriously? He could've slept with anyone, and he chose one of the girls I trusted most in the world.” You shake your head and your heart clenches at the thought.
“Well, at least one good thing came out of this.” She says, tossing your shirt into the ‘keep’ pile.
“What?” You ask with major confusion. What the hell is that supposed to mean? She thinks it's good that you got cheated on?
“Now I get to be your best friend!” She smiles and laughs, and that causes you to laugh as well.
“Yeah, and I guess if he had cheating in his mind, I don't want him anyways.” You then get up off of your bed and sit next to Nobara, leaning your head on her shoulder.
She puts the pair of pants she was holding down and wraps her arm around you.
You both just sit like that. Neither of you says a word, but you feel a sense of peace washing over you for the first time since the break up.
“So do you wanna beat up his car now?” Nobara says, breaking the silence, and all you can do is smile and laugh.
Yuji Itadori:
“He did WHAT??” Yuji practically screams and you immediately slap your hand over his mouth.
About thirty minutes ago, you found your boyfriend (well, now ex-boyfriend) kissing another girl.
Your first reaction was to run to Yuji's room despite it being midnight and pray to God that he was still awake.
When he answered the door, you could hear Human Earthworm playing in the background, basically telling you that you hadn't woken him up or anything.
Yuji stares at you with wide eyes and says something from under your hand, buts it's muffled.
“Yuji, you have to shut up! It's midnight and I'm not supposed to be in here! We'll both get our asses kicked if we wake anyone up!” You whisper-scream to him and he begins frantically nodding his head.
You remove your hand from his mouth and wipe it on your shirt since he got a little bit of his spit on it.
“Ew...” You whisper softly.
“I can't believe him! You're supposed to be his Jenifer Lawrence, guys aren't supposed to cheat on their Jenifer Lawrence's!!” He whispers back, somewhat aggressively.
You can't help but chuckle at his dumb reference.
“Tell me his address!! I gotta square up with this guy!!” He whispers again and you laugh again.
You don't know it, but he's acting stupid on purpose. He's not super skilled at comforting people, but he's great at making people laugh.
“‘Square up’??? Yuji, what is this? A 2000's drama comedy?” You whisper through hushed giggles, your hand now over your mouth to prevent yourself from laughing too hard.
“I'm serious, no one cheats on my best friend without catching these hands!!” He whisper-yells back, which only causes you to laugh harder.
He continues making dumb statements until you both forget the time and are now laughing hard, not even whispering anymore.
Suddenly, there's a knock at the door that snaps you two out of your laughter.
Yuji quickly throws a blanket over you to ‘hide’ you in case it's a teacher then gets up to see who's there.
When he opens the door, he's met with an extremely annoyed and tired Megumi.
“Listen, I don't know what the hell you two are doing up at 1:30 in the morning but if you could shut up and go to sleep so that I can sleep, that'd be great.” He groans, glaring at Yuji then you.
“Do you think hiding under a blanket is actually gonna work?” He asks and you get out from under the blanket, your face is slightly flushed from embarrassment.
“That was Yuji's fault.” You say while pointing your finger at Yuji who them gasps.
“What!! I was trying to keep you out of trouble, how dare you push the blame onto me!!” He jokes back, and Megumi groans loudly.
“Just shut up.” He says before storming off back to his room.
Yuji shuts the door then walks back to his bed and sits beside you.
“We should have a sleepover!” He suggests with a big smile.
You tap your chin with your index finger, pretending to think.
“I dunno... You kick a lot in your sleep.” You tease him.
“I do not!” He retorts in offence.
“Fine. But if you kick me even one time then you have to do all my homework for the next month!” You say before laying down in his bed, pulling the covers over yourself.
He smiles and lays beside you.
“Deal.”
Megumi Fushiguro:
You hate this.
You can handle a lot of things, curses, training, homework, fighting...
But break ups?
You would rather take on a hundred special-grade curses all at once.
Megumi knows that about you. Which is why he's decided to let go of his nonchalant ‘I don't care about anything or anyone’ act for just today for you.
He knocks on your door and you answer.
“Oh, hey Megs. What're you doin' here?” You ask, your gaze shifting from his gaze to the blankets and snacks in his hands.
“Don't play dumb. You know I'm here to comfort you.” He rolls his eyes, walking into your room and setting everything down.
“I know, I just wanted to hear you say it.” You smile.
One of your favorite things to do is tease Megumi.
He knows that about you.
Come to think about it, Megumi probably knows everything about you. He's definitely your best friend. You'd probably choose him over anything and anyone. He knows your favorite songs, snacks, meals, movies, drinks, your biggest fears, your type, your pet peeves, everything.
So of course he came with every single snack you've ever said “Hey, this is really good” or “You know what you really need to try -!!” about.
Of course he came with his laptop to watch your favorite movies.
Of course he came with blankets and pillows to build a fort to watch said movies in.
Because contrary to popular belief, Megumi Fushiguro was the most thoughtful person you've ever known.
That's why he's your best friend.
“Oh, by the way, if you get a very detailed and remorseful apology from your ex, don't respond.” He randomly blurts out while building the fort for you two.
It's basically muscle memory for him after how many times he's done this for you.
“Megumi, please tell me you didn't threaten my ex into an apology...” You wince at the thought.
“I didn't threaten him.” He smirks as he puts the final blanket on the fort before crawling in.
You barely catch the smirk because it's gone within the same second it appears.
“Uh huh.” You reply sarcastically before crawling into the fort with him.
“So what do you wanna watch first?” He asks as he lists off all your favorite movies.
If you told anyone that the cold-as-stone Megumi Fushiguro was here in your dorm, building a fort for you and watching your favorite movies with you and cuddling with you when you both fall asleep, they'd laugh in your face.
But that didn't matter to you, since all you cared about was that you got to see that side of Megumi, and you wouldn't trade moments like this for the world.
---
A/n: this is basically just because I have evermore stuck in my head rn and it made me think ab Satoru helping reader after a break up!? Also, guess which one of them is my favorite 😋😋 I think it's obvious but idk..
#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#jjk x reader#satoru gojo x reader#gojo x reader#satoru gojo#gojo satoru#jjk gojo#jujutsu gojo#nobara kugisaki#jjk nobara#jujutsu kaisen nobara#jujutsu nobara#nobara x reader#yuji jjk#jjk yuji#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#jjk megumi#megumi x reader#jujutsu megumi#jujutsu kaisen megumi
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Hey, I was wondering if you create headcannons for the Blush Blush boys. If so, I was wondering 👀
Can you describe how any of the immortal characters (Stirling, Seth, Reece?, Aki, Haru, Fuyu) would react if their SO/MC/Love interest reincarnates after they die of old age for example?
I’m a huge fan of reincarnation x immortal stuff, cause it gives off a happy ending and hope that their love will never die even if they’re reborn in a different time💖
I wanna start at the top by saying I think all of them freak out at least a little bit when they see their long dead lover seemingly up and alive again
I'll get into each one individually but needless to say, it's a bit of a shock to the lot of them
also I did a thing about The Immortals dealing with your death (that I will but a link to here later but right now I can't be bothered to shift through my many bullshit posts to find it atm OOPS SORRY)
(ps: love your stuff btw!!! <3 )
STARTING OFF
Stirling:
I think he's gone through this too many times and loves the drama of it all too much to ever have him claim that he will never love again after you (at least not forever)
but suffice it to say he doesn't think he'll ever have a love like you again in any of his life times worth of living he has left to get through
he also didn't become a vampire to kick the bucket quickly nor does he think he'll be headed in the same direction as you when he eventually does so he's in no particular hurry to 'follow you' as it were
so he has made his peace with forever longing for you and eternally mourning your passing a little bit all the time
until one day he happens to spot
well
you
I mean it can't be you but he knows that face
he knows that body
that aura, that smile
it's definitely you
your face was probably in the crowd at one of his competitions
he did loose points for how he fumbled when he clocked you
(but he still won don't get it twisted)
I think the moment his routine is done he b-lines it to his dressing room then directly to go find 'you'
he does find you in a crowd and nervously and suddenly asks if you'd like to go for dinner with him
like
now
right now.
how bout it??
you tentatively say yes and you two end up having the most awkward dinner of either of your lives
he's trying so hard not to flip out cause it's definitely you but also it can't be
can it????
BUT YOU WERE DEAD
he slowly begins to romance you
the new you
which is a lot like the old you
I think he's the handsome yet mysterious man who is romancing you and he doesn't fully let anything slip until one night you stay over and you find a painting of what is definitely but also so not you on the wall
cue him finding you staring at it and accidentally scaring you
only to calm you down then explain the whole sorted mess
and how he believes you are the reincarnation of his lover
I think no matter what there's going to be some push and pull moving forward
he has to decide if he loves you or just the idea of you that acts as some theoretical replacement for his great dead love
will there be a happy ending??
will love prevail??
can love continue on even after death??
only time will tell...
but he does not intend to give up on you that easily...
Seth:
you being reincarnated is actually his doing
against his best laid plans, you didn't end up in hell with him when you died
I think he could only stand it for a few months before he called in a favor and got your soul entered into the reincarnation program
that DOES mean he'll have to wait 18+ years to even attempt to make a move
and also that you won't remember him
or much if anything of your previous life
which means there's a 50/50 toss up that you'll be happily taken when he can actually find you again
he doesn't watch over you as you grow cause that's too creepy
but he does put some lesser demons/spirits to keep an eye on you and keep you safe
he doesn't want to have to start this process all over again
nor does he know how many otherworldly favors he can rely on for this
I think he 'randomly' bumps into you one day when you're old enough and he starts flirting and asks you out
I think whether or not he tells you about the whole deal will depend on how things play out
he doesn't necessarily see the need to but on the other hand
maybe it's worth you knowing
also it's the biggest romantic move he ever pulled
also honesty is nice in a relationship
but all in all it's just nice to have you back again
where he can see and hold and kiss you
also he probably had to call in a favor just to get to the mortal realm in the first place
idk he's burning a lot of big favors for this meet cute to go down but it's worth it
Reece:
I think with Reece it's less of a reincarnation and more an alt time line version of you
one where you never met and you got to live your life without it being crash landed into by a space traveling cat boy
I think at first he meant to keep his distance
you're not HIS you after all
but he couldn't help but watch you just
exist
for a bit
he missed you
and I think one thing lead to another and he ended up bumping into you and you gave him that cute smile and he didn't mean to but he heard himself asking you for coffee before he could give it a second thought
and then before he could give it a second word you had said yes
and then he was just over come with joy cause you said yes to a date so excitedly and quickly
it all kinda just
happened
I think you have a wonderful first date and he spends most of it working up the courage to tell you everything and also just enjoying the date
but towards the end of it he finally fesses up
you guys had done all this before
well, a different version of you in another timeline/universe
but all the same
he has already gone down this road
and now he's just doing it again cause it's hard for him to stay away from you
but you are gone
were gone
are
in his version of things anyway
and this was fun but maybe...
maybe it should end here
one last night
where he got to tell you goodbye
(with a kiss)
but this is Definitely Not Dr Who bby--- something crazy happens at the end and the goodbyes are put on hold while you two go on Just This One crazy space adventure (that is totally not just this one lol)
CUE THE DOCTOR WHO THEME BEING PLAYED ON THAT CAT PIANO!
Aki:
OOO BOY IS THIS DUDE IN DENIAL
no grace, no decorum, no hesistation
he sees your face in a crowd and runs up and hugs you and begins to tear up as he says how much he missed you
meanwhile you are in the iron grip of big excitable fox man (time has past since your death and he's grown some) whom you definitely don't know and also he's calling you bunny
you try to tell him he's got the wrong person sorry
BUT HE IS HEARING NONE OF IT
cue him telling you all about your lives together and talking you to the home of the autumn clan and doing anything and everything to desperately rejog your memories
if you do get your memories back then commence Aki's great romance two electric boogaloo
but if you can't then he will get so heart broken
he'll ask you to still stay
let him learn the new you
let him show you the him you forgot
let him love you again
please don't leave him
(if you do decide to leave low key Aki will follow you and try to check in on you from time to time)
(if not out right sneak stalk you)
(please accept his feelings reincarnated love-chan)
Haru:
shocked, stunned, shook
he sees your face from across the bar and he can't believe it
like actually he can't believe it
he ends up staring for a really long time
then he's just watching you from different spots around the bar
getting better looks at different angles
keeping the biggest eye on you and drinking you in
yep
it's definitely you
but it can't be
they must just look like you
a lot like you
like exactly
must be a distant relatives
genetics are crazy
or maybe you had a love child...???
NO.
no no no no
you were Haru's loyal mate until the day you died
you wouldn't
and even if you did, you def would've invited him to the threesome
(one of the reasons he loved you so much)
whatever
he must be so drunk out of his mind and crazy lonely that he's seeing shit
whatever, they're hot and he could use a you substitute in his bed (not like he's had many people in his bed after you anyway-- too heart broken)
so fuck it, fuck them (like, in the sex way not the angry way)
so he goes up and starts hitting on them and when they turn around
oh no
they're definitely you
right down to the look they're giving him
I won't lie, he panics and bolts
he can't stop freaking out about last night all the next day
so he goes to that bar again and low and behold there you are again
Haru can't tell if he's relieved or more panicked by that
but still he has to dig some more
so he goes back over, trying the whole time not to absolutely loose it
gives you some line about being overcome by your beauty which is why he left in a panic haha
but seriously he'd love to get dinner with you sometime, here's his number, give him a call
oh also what's your name
he again can't tell if he's happy or freaked when you do actually call
he spends the whole dinner gently prying for info and just generally vibe checking to see if they're like his dead lover
and they really are
they definitely look it
and thus begins Haru's new torment of being so fucking CONFLICTED
he's so freaked that it's like you're alive again but also so happy to have you by his side
I think there's a lot of push and pull until he spills the beans
and then even more after he does
this is about to be the messiest relationship of Haru's life
which is saying something
BUT HE CAN'T NOT, IT'S YOU
Fuyu:
Fuyu bumps into you by chance and he's the most torn up about it of the lot of them
and visibly so too, he can't hide his feelings on this even a little bit
I think he is the quickest to tell you the whole thing
and also he calls you by the name of your past life (which may or may not be your name now)
he really does believe you are his heavenly gift sent back to him because your love is so fated
he takes some time getting used to
it's actually funny, this is the exact opposite of who you two were the first time
he's so unbelievably open to you from the word go
he bares his heart and feelings so much
you look so much like yourself before you left him, he can't help it
you were his safe place that he let all his walls down around
he can't put them back up now
his heart is beating open and bloody for you
he doesn't try and play it cool, he doesn't beat around the bush
he let's you know who you were to him
ARE to him
and asks you to be his once again
steam rolling you with love
and then waiting 'patiently' (not patient, he's sitting by like a puppy who wants a bite of your food) for you answer
it's quite a situation you find yourself in, isn't it
#bear text#blush blush game#blush blush#bear talks#bb game#sad panda studios#kitsune bundle#haru#fuyu#aki#reece#seth#stirling#I won't lie so--- the takahashi inspired haru fic I have brewing DOES involve a massive time jump but surprisingly DOESN'T involve#reincarnations even though YOU'D THINK IT WOULD given the style of show it's directly inspired by lol#dead ass tho everytime Inuyasha is still torn cause he's pining over Kikyo like BRUH#I get she didn't mean to kill you originally but she's now fully aware of what's going on and she's still trying to kill you and Kagome lik#a handful of times I know the first love is the deepest but she's also a walking corpse and at some point ya gotta let it go my guy#y'all were sweet and shit but too much has happened and also you low key have a new girl who looks just like your ex like--- just#side note the og ranma was taken off d plus while I WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF WATCHING IT and now I'm basically fucked I'm so SAD
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Zelda fandom stop misinterpreting Zelda's "I'm still your Zelda" challenge
#1. Hylia died and Zelda is mortal now 2. I'm still your Zelda means she still cares about him AS A FRIEND. AS MORE THAN HYLIA'S HERO#she feels bad for 'using him' BUT SHE DIDN'T REALLY. SHE'S CONFLICTED. SHE'S A VICTIM TOO#reading comprehension is SHIT in fandom#it's both her feeling sad that she unwilling made Link into the hero because she became friends with him BUT it's her saying that doesn't#mean I was never your friend!!! it doesn't mean she was plotting the whole time and she's evil. neither does it mean she's completely#innocent because she IS Hylia and she DOES feel guilt about it but she's ALSO zelda and she KNOWS THIS WAS THE ONLY WAY#WHAT WAS THE OTHER OPTION. LET DEMISE DESTROY EVERYTHING? LINK KNOWS THIS TOO AND IT'S A SACRIFICE HE WOULD MAKE OVER AND OVER AND OVER#AGAIN FOR HER. BECAUSE SHE'S HIS FRIEND. SHE'S STILL HIS ZELDA. AND SHE MAKES HER SACRIFICE FOR HIM AS ZELDA AND AS HYLIA#SHE GIVES UP HER AUTONOMY TOO BECAUSE THE ALTERNATIVE IS THE DESTRUCTION OF EVERYTHING#ZELDA FANDOM UNDERSTAND NUANCE AND STOP FUCKING DEMONIZING HYLIA/SWS ZELDA#sorry. I reached my threshold of stupid posts and need to rant again 💕
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#feeling really lonely lately and idk why#i mean i guess this is what 5 years of complete isolation do to ya lol#but yeah... sometimes it hits me that i don't really have friends (my fault obvs) and i just sit here with no idea how to change that lol#cause i have the curse of being ok while i'm alone and feeling incredibly anxious when i'm with people#so i convince myself that i'm better alone#and i am for the most part#but then 5 years since the last time i met someone that wasn't my mom or my brother go by and i go ''hmm... i don't think this is healthy''#and i spiral into a pit of dispair#like i can't believe that my highschool years when i was an absolute emo ''i hate everybody and everybody hates me'' kind of dude#were healthier than now#because i had online friends whom i talked to for hours about just random shit#and i met incredible people in uni but i haven't talked to them in literally i'm gonna say 5 years?#and the fact that they live 3hs away doesn't help but still#and i fully know I'M the problem#cause i isolate myself and i don't text and i don't hang out when they arrange hang outs#(again being 3hs away. relying on public transport and not feeling comfortable going out at night don't help..)#but also i put waaaayyyy too much pressure on this so that doesn't help at all#and i'm waaaay to awkward and self depricating to even attempt to have a meaningful friendship with anyone...#so i'm left here (by my own actions) alone and sad lol#i might be getting my period btw so maybe that's why i want to die today#but yeah... it's been in my head for a while now and i wanted to get it out so i can move the fuck on#if only i could be a normal person... sigh#angel talks#personal
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#I am certain the pap pics of Louis in Malibu were taken before the death#but before or after (as they claim they are) can I say how fucking creepy it is sending drones or whatever#to take pictures of him and his family chilling and living their lives in the private yard of their private fucking rental#obviously 20x worse if now but honestly not remotely okay if a few days ago either#and actually doing that and then sitting on them and then being like ooh yeah I know what'll get clicks#we'll use these now and say they are current look he doesn't care he's fine#is maybe worse than either#SO FUCKING GROSS AND WRONG#(although obvs if they are current not being visibly in tears at all times doesn't remotely mean anyone is fine I LOOK FINE RN#it doesn't mean I'm not fucking sad as shit)
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#just needed to vent for a sec but oh god am i tired of people#'friends' both irl and online got me fucked up lately#mental healths been in the shitter almost nonstop this year#familys always got me up the wall#i just feel like I'm constantly treading water and i am *tired*. like so fucking TIRED#it's never enough; it's too much; no not like that; but not that either; it's all wrong wRoNg WrOnG#ik im sleep deprived and possibly pms-y and that is most certainly not helping things rn but...#gods i see less and less of a reason to get out of bed and bother with anything ever again#wtf is the purpose#i can't keep friends to save my life bc im apparently a fuckin doormat and interesting as unflavored rice or smth#how hard is it to feel like you maybe sorta kinda matter and aren't an unlovable worthless piece of shit#years of therapy; trying meds; everything under the sun.... and nothing. lows and highs and dips of every kind and yet ..nothing#and maybe im just very much in my feelings rn and just yelling into the void.. but it hurts and im tired of pretending it doesn't.#i hate how hard it is to make friends as an adult especially irl. and how gossipy and cliquey and gross and mean ppl can be#of getting called childish and naive and boring for wanting to be a decent person and having interests outside of partying#(not attacking those traits but tired of getting attacked for *not* being 'fun' enough or 'social' enuf or 'sensitive' for having feelings)#enough*#i just want to go eat drywall and stand in the rain and let it help me pretend im not crying blood rn.#like every cell in my body isn't trying to spontaneously combust.#'it gets better' ..yeah? when. when i was 14? when i was 23? when im 37? when im 55? 82? WHEN.. bc im so sick and tired#and no this isn't me writing a final note or whatever it sounds like; i just wanted to word vomit bc ive never been good w sadness#and ive got such an overwhelming amount of it rn i can't even turn it into anger & spite & use that for productivity... i just want to rot#to lie down and be covered by plants as i sleep and just slowly fade into a cloud or smth like it's a ghibli movie or wtv.#im like shaking from how stupidly emotional i feel rn. the lack of empathy these days is fuckin astounding#common sense & empathy are lacking in absolutely droves these days. some days i hate the internet & tech for its irreparable damages sm#but here we are and here it shall remain. long after us; and *long* after us ..... *sigh*#anyway ima go try to take a nap or smth. I'll see ya when i see ya. take care my lovelies#if u read all this i prob owe you a cookie lol
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sorry for only saying this type of shit lately but i kinda wanna drive a car straight into a brick wall at the highest speed possible
#trying to keep it together so bad because i already know the problems and solutions and whatnot but i cannot do anything#i desperately just need to do something. accomplish any task. actually several would be nice. but i cannot stand just letting life go by#while i watch other people have the things i want. or even metaphorically living my dream like. that should be me why am i settling for thi#i hate even talking about this because i feel so stupid when i know it's not even a real tangible problem and that i actually DO have real#problems to tackle and the ability to do so but i'm choosing to be upset over the stupidest things i could possibly be sad about#and i can't even be sad about it in a normal way i'm cycling through like several different reactions to smth that isn't even real#or if it is real i literally do not have tanglible evidence for it one way or another like i'm driving myself insane for no reason#i can't even get catharsis because all i'm doing is digging a deeper hole for something i never should've gone back into in the first place#because i KNOW how i am i KNOW how i react to things and i still chose to do it lmao.#and i continue to choose to go through this shit instead of actively trying to change my life because... i'm lazy? and stupid? idk#negative self-talk isn't gonna get me to do anything either so let's just say i'm feeling particularly unmotivated like usual#i hated being a teenager but i really do miss when all my problems just amounted to 'someone was mean to me on tumblr today :(' or i failed#a test in chemistry or something. like i yearn for that simplicity becasue at this point all i'm doing is ruining my own life LMAO#i'm too scared to live i'm too scared to die so i just sit here and fantasize that life could be amazing if i wait#and i'll magically get everything i've ever wanted if i just wait long enough. and i know it isn't true and i still wait for it to happen.#because honestly like. i think deep down i am just convinced i will fail at anything i do when that shouldn't be what scares me.#what scares me should be never even allowing myself to fail because i never tried to do anything at all with myself or my life#like. wake the fuck up. get off your ass and put in the effort. learn some skills. gain independence and stability and discipline and do it#just live please i'm begging you just live so i can be happy don't i deserve to be happy... why am i not letting myself be happy#i'm literally keeping myself trapped in this negative feedback loop ON PURPOSE because teehee shiny toy#and it doesn't matter if the love is real it doesn't matter how i feel like i'm just using it as a distraction i can't say it's motivation#because it's barely motivated me at all. i have to start being realistic. 25 & just realizing you actually have to participate in your life#anyways. i've cried i've agonized i've pictured killing myself in 30 different ways. i think the only way i'm gonna feel better is#to just actually try this time without giving up. wish me luck
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i don't think i'll ever get over how people treat kids that aren't good in school as worthless no matter what. "oh it can't be that bad" my guy idk how to tell you this but the last time i went to a normal high school the principal called me into his office to brag about how he failed me in all of my classes before the semester was even finished & i should quit while i'm ahead cuz i'm too stupid ("officially" diagnosed as such by a school counselor & a psychiatrist!!) to succeed. & this is considered normal
#''poor teachers!!'' yeah well at least they can fucking quit & go work somewhere else#''okay but times are different than when you went to school in the 1970's'' this was 2016 my guy. shut the fuck up#''well maybe you were a violent & severely misbehaving kid!'' i wasn't. i have ADHD & severe anxiety disorder & depression#my biggest crime was being too exhausted & dopamine deprived to do my homework#my dad talks about how he was treated in school & i'm like damn dude i went through the same exact shit#how is it that a majority of teachers & principals are still abusive power-tripping pieces of shit 60 years later#why haven't things changed#well actually the answer is simple & it's because they want disabled people to disappear#& if abled students that simply disagree with the way things are done get caught in the crossfire then that is acceptable#because anyone not fit to make billionaires a billion more dollars should just die!#anyways here are my original tags from that gravity falls post i just reblogged:#I know this is supposed to be an appreciation post but like. ''for being the ''dumb one'' he's surprisingly rational.'' seriously??#as ''the dumb'' but ''surprisingly rational'' one of my family this is THEE biggest misunderstanding & it drives me up the fucking wall#just because a person struggles in one area doesn't mean they're stupid & should be an irrational dumb dumb idiot baby holy fuckkk#sorry to OP but even when people try to ''appreciate'' stuff like this they can't help but throw in insults#simply because they genuinely believe that ''even though you're stupid you SURPRISINGLY act competent sometimes'' is a compliment#I'm less mad about this & more sad that this kind of shit is still so prevalent in 2024#both Stanley & Stanford are smart & competent & rational#they just show it in different ways & exceed in different (sometimes overlapping) subjects#this is normal for human beings but the big societal scam is that if you don't do it in the way Ford does then you're stupid & a failure#& being surprised that Stan is also smart & competent in his own ways is the biggest sing that you fucking fell for it dude#btw before i get @ ed for this. i WAS that kid#i was so much that kid the school actually diagnosed me with stupid & spiteful & i was told to quit while i was ahead (they failed me befor#obviously this is very personal for me but also i don't think people realize the language they use is on purpose & it's used specifically t#& it's still happening right now & that just. makes me wanna cry honestly#like why are people still surprised that people can specialize in something despite bad grades in school#you know. the thing we all know is literally rigged to either put you in jail or in a factory to make billionaires more money.#man sorry for the rant the original spirit of the post is super correct but like fuck HS grade-centric judging of people's entire character#Stan being able to defeat Bill is just not at all surprising if you were him or knew/know someone like him#or really paid any attention at all to the show while watching it
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God DAMN do Lore Olympus Antis not know how to properly tag their shit
#lore olympus#lo#like I'm honestly way past the point of being mad at the hate#because these folks are so miserable they basically make hating the comic their whole personality#and as annoying as it is it's honestly kinda sad#but that doesn't mean they should be allowed to hog the fucking tag for the comic#like i swear the lore Olympus tag is FLOODED with hate and only a fraction of the posts in the tag are even about the fucking comic now#it's so fuckin annoying#i know it sounds crazy but people are allowed to like things you find bad#and actively shitting on them isn't gonna make them like it less#i swear these people need to grow the fuck up and learn some basic tumblr etiquette#this shit is getting out of hand
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you ever miss your comfort character so bad you gotta go outside about it
#idk i've been pretty stressed that's probably why i randomly got rly sad abt it#and by it i mean the uh. gestures vaguely at fandom i guess#either nobody's there or it feels like i'm not exactly welcome. or both! which tough shit i'mma take up the space regardless but like#this weird sense of elitism I get in a space that's built by and nurtured by people whose MO is 'caring a lot' is.. hm.. interesting#idk just got reminded this morning that some people view critique as a free pass to drag a creator through the mud#when what you SHOULD be doing is uplifting them so that they can improve and reach their maximum potential. you clown. you absolute buffoon#it wasn't targeted at me or anything it just made me so angry/sad. smad. i'm smad about it#i just get hit with a wave of what's the point. what's the fucking point nobody cares abt things made with passion for the love of the game#we don't have time/it's not good enough/it doesn't matter/it's been done better/why x when we have y#and you know what fair enough everyone's entitled to their own emotional responses of course.#if you think your opinion is reason enough to tear it down then we're gonna have to agree to disagree on that one i think#just keep in mind that you could have loved what they made. other people could have loved it. it could have changed something for someone.#i personally know artists and have worked with artists who have put so so much effort into making something work over and over and over#only to have no audience and get back up saying guys let's give this just one more try.#hell back in the day I was an accomplished writer kid who was told that you may be good but nobody gives a fuck#artists who use up all these resources just to bring something new into the world and nobody's looking. what's the point. what's the point#anyway. i'm gonna go wade through the snow for a bit maybe sink my bare hands into it you guys want anything#started the post thinkin abt my blorbos ending it crying putting my shoes on alright I'm going I'm GETTING the FRESH AIR fuck off#i'll be god once i've gotten a bottle of coke and some mozzarella sticks. wait am i pmsing. fuck#god i hate that i don't drink sometimes.
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Does anyone know how to teach your dog how to stand up to bullies?
#before you worry: yes ofc I step in when the other dog is mean to her. and I watch them always.#I literally don't let this freak of a dog outta my sight when he's not in his kennel. as he's...stupid. very stupid.#almost 5 years old and never went to obedience school and can't be off leash because he doesn't know commands stupid.#Eats everything in sight stupid. will start choking on rocks and other shit that happens to be on his path stupid.#HER OWN FUCKING TOYS. GROWLS AND BITES AT HER.#His owner is very kind and pays very well though. (I think she likes treating this dog like her baby and that's why he is the way he is.)#It's just that this other dog. is half Mocha's size.#but she's just such a sweetheart that she'll bring out HER toys to play with him and to share. but then he WILL NOT LET HER PLAY#I take the toy away but Mocha tries to bring it out to play again but then other dog just snatches it up >:(#She brings out another for herself? He snatches it up. She tries to get it back? He growls and bites at her. Even if he's currently not#playing with it. and I'm just thinking “Mocha.You're older than him and you're bigger. You're too sweet. Don't let him treat you like this!#we've had another playdate with a dog once where she brought out her favorite toy. and her friend destroyed it. And Mocha was so so sad#Mocha's always very gentle and soft with her toys. as she likes to nibble and cuddle with them instead of destroying.#sighs#it's not like. too “bad” as I make sure to never let it get too bad. but I still get sad about my doggy getting picked on :'(#especially as this other dog...will not be changing tbh. I doubt it.#Mad rambles#my floofs
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so do the rest of you guys just simplify your dreams when explaining them to people or do I just remember a significantly weirder degree of depth than the average bear
#thinking about shit like this every morning when i wake up after like#spending the past however many hours in part of a high stakes cop drama that takes place in the pokemon world#but my pokemon is actually an elder scrolls character pretending to be a weird rare pokemon because it's easier than passing as human#and the fair we are trying to get through is down a dirt road alley that's also a depressingly empty polynesian farmers market#and we gotta go fast because my irl friend who's with us really wants to have a mantine draped over his shoulders like when he was a kid#but then we find out that the mantine encounter was at the aquarium next to the fair and not the fair itself and he just misremembered#so he's all sad while we're riding go karts and dirtbikes because he doesn't get to play with the mantines#but anyway we were here for the cop drama bit because some teenage girl got assaulted and we need to beat up the perp's pokemon#(perp himself has already been bagged)#and now I'm realizing that I don't know what fake pokemon moves to tell my fake “pokemon” to use#(he's a daedric prince it's not like he'd listen to me anyway he's about to obliterate the fuck outta this sunflora no matter what I say)#which leads me to wondering why I can't think of a decent steel-type pokemon move similar to slash#(“metal claw only works if you have claws” I think to myself wondering why there isn't some kind of sword move like ffs honedge exists)#anyway he's already finished the fight so it doesn't matter we can go home back through the depressing farmers market#home is aboard a KotoR-esque spaceship of course which is good because it means I get “back at camp” dialog with my daedra friend#but he's gone now shit fuck where did he go is he killing people without me this is bad I leave and start walking through crowded streets#people are trying to sell me shit but I ignore them#I'm accosted by a guy dressed like an old-west outlaw who says that he's with the vigil of stendarr and he's here hunting daedra#I tell him to fuck off because honestly I'm no longer invested in this dream's narrative arc#(I'm trying to envision a different scenario that is more appealing to my current tastes but lucid dreaming was a lie and I can't hack it)#then I wake up#next night I dream about being an omnipotent dragon god with a marsupial pouch full of my adopted babies (JJK characters)
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so like, watching season 6 and richard says something like "what do you mean they're a candidate?" and im just. blown away. holy shit, jacob is a fucking prick. richard didn't fucking know
#i'm sitting here like ''what do you mean richard doesn't know about the candidate thing????''#holy shit the others are a CULT cult#the sad realisation that ben and richard have no idea what they're doing anything for#and at least they find out#people like tom and ethan and goodwin and countless others fucking died without knowing#what any of this is for#thats insane to me#ben fucking calls jacob out on this and jacob is like. whatever#these people have killed people. and kidnapped children. and they had no idea why!!!#see it'd been a while since i watched lost and i assumed richard knew about the candidates#nope! he truly does not know a damn thing!!!
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yeah so i dont get the "wasn't that some fucked up shit? anyway i'm Rod Sterling" mentality some people have towards different narrative reads. It's all sweet and cool to want to explore all the different variations of a fucked up scenario, but i'm gonna need the reasons for it. I need the "why"; why are we exploring this thing? Why is it important to explore this story? what am i getting out of it? and no it's not about morality.
I dont need a story to teach me "good" life lessons, though that'd be lovely. I dont need it to be an exceptional and exemplary narrative even, but i need my discoveries to be purposeful and meaningful. Sometimes the aim for an exploration of say, a very tragic story, is to simply experiences the different flavours and nuances and complexities of a deeply held personal emotion; sometimes it helps us find the mirroring and connection and relatedness that we need to feel seen and heard and understood. Sometimes it helps you parse out your own bullshit by taking it out of your head and putting it in front of you– i dont care what the reason is, but there's a reason. There's a purpose for every single endeavour you take on, even if you haven't discovered the reason yet. "i just want to experience a fucked up shit" lazy superficial thinking, dig deeper. I hate superficial and purposeless shit; and no i'm not gonna explore the 863796373th trending trauma porn piece of the day because "wouldn't that be fucked up?" nah. I dont care, it's got no use to me. I will absolutely respect the endeavour and make space for it if someone tells me something as simple as "it is relevant to me and my interests and experiences and my mental preoccupations, and helps me refine my humanity and my understanding of humanity in general", that is a lovely and true statement. But if someone keeps churning out worst possible fucked up sad scenarios one after another under the "wouldn't that be fucked up?" flag, i'm out, i dont give a fuck. take your sad shit somewhere else, i have absolutely zero space for purposeless horrible narratives that positively add nothing to my life and dont help me navigate it in any meaningful way.
#and no we dont say the same thing about happy stories because happy stories feel good. that can be a purpose in and of itself#if someone tells me that tragic stories make them feel good i can still make space for it; it's not as sturdy a means but it'll do just fin#i literally dont get the '' fucked up story for the sake of fucked up story'' crowd like ???????#you guys do understand that we live by the narratives we immerse ourselves into right?? you know that our worldviews and beliefs#and conscious/subconscious frameworks are all stories we tell ourselves right?? right?????#This rant delivered to you by me seeing that tumblr famous Tamsyn Muir quote 3 in the morning and like#lmaoooo no.#millenials leak their incessant nihilism into every fucking crevice of the arts and it's so tiring to watch.#no your constant deconstruction of meaning and purpose and value is not cute#no you're not subversive and revolutionary for creating the 85379637th Sad Shit Of The Day— you're literally protocol behavior#and you couldn't be more in alignment with the moral status quo of our time.#no aimless and listless shock value traumatic stories are not fun and 'adventurous';#they just speak to you circling right back into the comfortable confinements of your socially acceptable superficiality#and vapid consumerism.#goddd i'm tired. lack of purpose frees these fuckers from ever having to align with any substantial endeavour in their goddamn lives#and they think it's so funny; it's not.#I expect something out of the stories i explore. ''tragedy for the sake of tragedy'' is the laziest thing i have ever heard.#humans are designed to be happy; they're also designed to engage in meaningful and intentional growth.#own up to anything to gives you a chance to grow and expand and change or get the fuck out of my face#this blog is an absolutely unsafe space for socially sanctioned neutered nihilism#i will hunt you for sport; it doesn't matter anyway right??
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meanwhile my experience with being asexual is just like. constant self hatred and apologizing about it
#it's just. idk it's ace week and no one is talking about it#and i go in the tags and it's just. ace culture is basically all memes#and it's fine but like. i enjoy having serious conversations about it#i never get to talk about it because it's such a non thing#ace culture is like it's filling the hole that comes from not having a sexuality with jokes about bread and cake and dragons for some reason#but like. i want to talk about how sad and lonely it is a lot of the time. but it's a thing where it feels so self imposed#like of course no one wants to be romantic with me in any sense when i am so awkward from past trauma#combined with the fact that i will never be able to give them what they actually are aiming for#like. high school was fucking miserable.#i mean i'm already crying so why not make it worse here#it's just. i feel like i am missing out on so much and i hate that i am made to feel like this#and no one fucking takes me seriously when i try to talk about it#it's a big part of who i am and it's always a shadow because it just doesn't matter#i just... i want people to see the beauty not in filling that void with other memey shit and just. acknowledge the void#internally and externally and in every way possible being asexual is so crushingly lonely and no one ever talks about it#we're not in ba sing se we can talk about it please#and now i will apologize#and i will lay down because i have a headache and i need to calm down
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"people love you uwu people care about you" okay? not my problem. love me less. can we work out a reasonable level of care where it's obviously not cool if horrible things happen to me, a human being, and you won't do any horrible thing to me, but you don't feel obligated to fuss over anything out of the ordinary i do and i have to shut up about it and perform Normal Human Emotions lest i commit an awful social faux pas and hurt your feelings?
#like idk. can you care about stuff that matters? i guess is what i'm asking?#sorry that my own self-directed problems hurt you <3#sorry that i'm a horrible person if i talk about it and a horrible person if i don't <3#i just shouldn't have problems i guess cant believe i didnt think abt that#sorry i don't really care if people would be sad to see me die#would actually be pretty nice to get past the huge feeling of guilt over not being helpful all the fucking time#like i can't go through life being a service dog for everybody around me#(and i dont to be clear. it's not possible and when i say i feel guilty over not doing it it doesn't mean i do 100% of the time)#(i do try to be helpful and useful and i hate missing an opportunity but also i don't have 24/7 free of obligations)#(and i can't magically spot and correctly understand what could need help)#(but i feel like it does take up a good portion of my life. mostly bc everybody around me has Problems rn)#(and because the overlap of ''things that feel good for me'' and ''things that are good for other people'' is pretty small so far)#it's just. yknow. i would like it if for once i could express a negative feeling without it being a huge offense to people around me#ejhrkthrjeh i know i'm just asking the universe if pretty please my actions could have zero consequences and it's overall unrealistic#but like. god. i wish for once it was met with indifference. casual vibes. not a huge deal yknow.#some of my friends do sometimes! it's nice! but of course i can't talk abt the problems that directly include them#i know it makes me so shit at reacting to ppls problems. like either i overcompensate with the worry cuz i feel like thats what they want#or i react coldly and dont provide anything useful to the situation#broadcasting my misery#vent
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