#it! may have made me! bad at being in equal and transparent loving relationships! a little bit!

[thedreadvampy]

one of those many days where I say groundbreaking things such as 'hmmmm...perhaps my life...has been somewhat bad at some points'

'perhaps..........this may have had some amount of lasting emotional impacts.........?'

[utilitycaster]

I feel like most of the people who highly criticise tlovm should present a plan on how they would adapt it better. especially with vex's story, i don't understand why people seem to imply cr somehow suddenly became misogynistic and that they're "rewriting her story for the sake of vax's". it's so easy to be a hater and do bad faith readings but honestly if there ever was an adaptation where you can safely assume the original authors are satisfied, it is tlovm just based on the degree of their involvement alone. and supposedly who is to blame for that? is everyone against Laura? did Laura supposedly misunderstand her own character's story?

Hey anon!

So like...I feel you, but, to be fair, I stand by people's right to dislike a story without knowing how to fix it! I like to try and piece together how I'd do it differently because that's fun for me but it's always completely valid to say "I don't vibe"; it's just that it is worth exploring why you don't vibe. Sometimes it's not anything deep and revealing about you, but sometimes it is, and you'll never know which it is unless you take a look. I also, as always, will defend 1. being a hater and 2. saying "I recognize the cast is having fun and likes it but I'm not a fan." Those are extremely valid feelings to have!

With that said, you are correct that there is this weird attitude that tends specifically towards Laura that I and many others have commented on, where they seem to think she has absolutely no say in anything and they need to protect her, but it's transparently a cover to hide that they hate 99% of her choices. Genuinely, I need everyone in the fandom to look in the mirror, and say "Laura Bailey has been a willing participant in every canon relationship her characters have been in, and indeed, typically, an equal or greater instigator thereof, and I don't need to like those choices, but I do need to acknowledge she made them." (While they're at it, they can shut the fuck up about the chibi pin hair being pink, like, let's talk about how Laura is in charge of merch and probably approved it personally, whereas some uh. other Imogen depiction choices, shall we say have been conspicuously absent from anything Laura may have had any say in; I think it's fair to assume she is fine.)

On top of that, I'm also openly someone who's like...I like Vax well enough, but he's not in the top half of VM characters for me. I also find the "TWINNIES" people who are obsessed with their earlier codependent behavior and continue to overlay it on the actors constantly as if they personally knew Laura and Liam, years after VM aired, to be rather insufferable. At the same time, though, Vax and Vex are indelible and central parts of each other's stories. Vex's story is about her, and Vax is a huge part of her, and it's stupid to pretend otherwise. Vex's story is also very much about how some part of her still wishes her father loved and respected her, and it's extremely about being able to love Percy, someone with their own struggles with darkness, and being able to ask him for help. Her story is very much her own, but her relationships with these three male characters are central to it, and you cannot excise them from the narrative to fulfill some elementary-school level surface-level idea of what Women In Fiction should look like. It's valid to want a story that is about a woman whose primary relationships, romantic or otherwise, are with other women. But Vex is not, canonically, that woman; you are making up an OC and giving them her face if you say she is.

(What I actually need is for everyone to watch the scene in which Scanlan leaves, actually; if you can watch that and internalize it, you will get Vex's character arc because she flat-out says it to Scanlan - and if you skip it bc you cry too much or whatever, you will not.)

[nixie-writes]

AHHH YES I would love to hear about your oc, I looooove hearing bout others oc's !!!!!! i have 2 of my own for hazbin !!!!!!!!!if ur comfy ofc <3333333

!!! I didn't think anyone would be interested but thank you!! I have a really lengthy G-Doc for her so I'll just paste it here, and include the full body transparent art I did for her. In this I'll be repeatedly referencing a character named Willow, who belongs to my friendo @willowaudreykeyes so please keep that in mind! (I hope you don't mind me directly referencing your OC, Remy, love ya!)

Nixie (referred to as Nix by close friends) is a water nymph Hell-born demon, Overlord of Mythology. Her body is made of water and she can shift her form to her desire, however she chooses a more bunny-like appearance. She believes it represents purity and a motherly spirit. She currently works with the Happy Hotel as redemption manager, learning why separate sinners fell to Hell and setting up treatment plans to get them redeemed. She considers Willow, Overlord of Medicine, Charlie Morningstar, Husk and Niffty as good friends. She has a strained frenemy relationship with Alastor; she dislikes him, however her closest friend Willow is dating him and as such, she tolerates him. She is one of, if not the only Hell-born Overlord and as such, she sees herself as a political voice for Hell-borns. She believes that Hell-borns, including imps, Hell-hounds, succubi and the such, are all treated unfairly because they were born in Hell and never had the chance to enter Heaven. She believes Hell-borns should be treated equally to sinners. Being the Overlord of Mythology, a form of media that still stands in current humanity, she holds power and is of good status among Overlords. Towards Hell-borns, she has a very motherly and nurturing demeanor. While she has no children of her own, she views Hell-borns as her children, even ones older than her. She always wanted her own children, but never felt comfortable enough with another Overlord or Hell-born to settle down with, and never considered settling down with a sinner. She also has her political career at stake and fears she may be forced to choose between biological children and her career. She believes Hell-borns have been betrayed by the political system and forced to the bottom of the food chain and she intends to use her status as Overlord to change this. She has a bias to Hell-borns, as she considers them her responsibility. Towards sinners, she’s more reserved and has a standoff-ish personality. She isn’t the nicest to sinners; she has no experience with them and believes every sinner is in Hell because they did something terrible in life. She’s unaware of how strict Heaven is and thinks there are too many sinners stuck in one ring, and believes that either the sinners should be removed or allowed to traverse other rings. Hence, why she agrees to help with the redemption - if she can help sinners achieve redemption, Hell will begin to clear up and there will no longer be a need for yearly exterminations that risk the lives of Hell-borns and sinners alike. Throughout her time at the hotel, she grows warmer to the sinners and understands not all of them are evil, some are just victims of bad circumstances, and she finds herself falling for a specific sinner she works with. Alongside other Overlords, she can be stiff and downright rude if she feels the need to be. Her reputation precedes her as kind and motherly to Hell-borns, but the other Overlords are all sinners who abused the political system to gain their placement, in her mind. During required Overlord meetings she isn’t very talkative unless she feels the need to bring in her position, otherwise she doesn’t speak unless spoken to. She specifically dislikes Alastor, Valentino and Vox, though she doesn’t quite mind Rosie, as her friend Willow works with Rosie.

When she deals with Alastor alone she’s very tight and keeps to herself, always second guessing anything he says, regardless of his friendly demeanor. She’s complacent with him but makes it visible she dislikes him, making a point to frown his way any time he gets her attention. Her frown doesn’t suggest weakness to him, it suggests genuine distaste. She believes he’s too unpredictable and not trustworthy. She wouldn’t trust him around a child for a moment. Among her friends, she’s more lax and laughs sometimes. She’s reserved and quiet often, but around those she truly trusts (Willow, Charlie and Niffty specifically) she’s a little looser and loves to have girl’s nights. She enjoys watching the other girls do each others’ hair and nails and have love and crush talks (Charlie talking about Vaggie, Willow talking about Alastor much to Nixie’s chagrin and Niffty talking about men she sees in magazines). When they ask her if she has an interest in anyone Nixie simply shrugs and says, “I don’t know, we’ll see”. She has feelings for a sinner in the hotel but refuses to admit it, even if she gets all flustered around said sinner. Willow, her closest friend, hasn’t revealed if she’s aware of Nixie’s crush or not. With Charlie, her friendship with her and, by extension, Vaggie, is business on the surface. Nixie works for them non-profit and has to discuss treatment plans for specific sinners. However in private, Nixie is very chill with Charlie and Vaggie. She enjoys their wholesome relationship and likes being the platonic third wheel in the fun stuff they do together. With Niffty, she enjoys how neat and friendly the smaller cyclops is. She can’t imagine what a sweet young lady like her did to end up in Hell. She enjoys watching and helping Niffty clean around the hotel, listening to Niffty talk about men she’s noticed and what she likes about them. She thinks Niffty is a little loose emotionally and fears she may get her heart broken, but she issues Niffty that if any man hurts her they’ll never forget the consequences. With Husk, she’s very flustered around him, both in public and in private. She doesn’t drink, but many nights she’ll come down to the common room late at night to talk with him. They have a secret close friendship, but she wishes for more. She loves to see his card tricks, including his sleight of hand, though she can never learn it herself. She encourages his magic tricks and, while she doesn’t like his drinking habits, she likes him for who he is and wishes he feels the same. With Willow, Nixie considers Willow her closest friend and confidant. They have a very close friendship, as they’re both Overlords and both share a love interest with two men associated with each other. Willow, being a plant-based demon, needs water for her herbs and her body, and Nixie happily provides. Throughout the day she’ll brush by Willow and leave water on her body for her leaves to soak up. Though she dislikes Alastor she insists on helping Willow set up dates with Alastor, and Nixie may or may not spy on them to make sure Alastor doesn’t try pulling a trick out of his sleeve. Nixie is unabashedly herself around Willow with no shame and the two get along great, always appreciating each other’s company, both within and outside work confines. They often have sleepovers, just the two of them, where they talk about a litany of things, though Willow seems insistent on talking about Alastor. Nixie is tempted to dump all her mixed feelings about Husk and her crush on him to Willow but fears that Willow may try to act upon it or force Nixie to confess. Nixie and Willow have a very close relationship, like sisters, and Nixie would do anything for Willow’s sake.

This should be transparent; I drew this myself, it isn't my best work but this was 30 layers in Sai so here you go!

[deancas-fanfiction]

A Daydream Away

Chapter 2/?

Summary: After multiple couples go missing from a resort in northern Minnesota, Dean and Cas are forced to pose as a couple to investigate the mysterious entity. As Dean and Cas navigate their fake relationship, it leaves Dean questioning what's real and forces him to confront his feelings for Cas.

A story in which Cas is human, Dean is sometimes an idiot, and Sam acts as matchmaker.

Tags: fake relationship, case fic, sharing a bed, human!cas, Sam ships Dean and Cas, fluff, eventual smut

available on ao3 Read Ch. 1 here

Dean began to slowly stir from sleep. For the first time in years, he awoke feeling well-rested. No pounding headache from the aftershock of a hangover, no repressed memories rattling in his head from a recurring nightmare, and there was no dry feeling in his eyes from sleeping only a few hours. Instead, he felt warm and relaxed as he began to regain consciousness. He slowly opened his eyes, blinking away the sleep as he took in his surroundings. Morning sun hazily streamed in through the gaps in the curtains and it was perfectly still and quiet. Dean sighed in content and went to roll over to fall back asleep. Except a weight on his chest prevented him from moving.

Dean tensed, realizing Cas was lying across him. His head was resting in the crook of his neck and his arm was flung over his chest in an almost possessive like manner. His right leg was intertwined with Dean's, sufficiently entangling the two so Dean couldn't easily tear himself away. Cas' breath softly fanned against his neck, leaving goosebumps in its wake. As if all of that wasn't bad enough, Dean quickly remembered they were both nearly naked, wearing nothing but their boxer briefs. This meant their bare skin was pressed together and that there was only a very thin material of fabric protecting Dean from a very embarrassing situation. He closed his eyes at that thought and focused on his breathing to calm himself down.

It was at that moment that Cas began to stir. Dean silently cursed whatever entity was at fault for this awkward situation he was about to be in. Cas flexed his fingers and he tightened his grip on Dean rather than pulling away in alarm, as he had expected.

"Uh Cas?"

"Hmmph."

"Buddy, I gotta go to the bathroom. Would you let up?" Dean tried peeling Cas' arm off him with that request but was unsuccessful.

"No."

Okay, so Cas was a totally unabashed cuddler. Dean added it to the mental list of social norms that Cas hasn't exactly picked up on yet. He internally groaned as Cas remained plastered to him. As Cas' breathing once again evened out and he fell back asleep, Dean's mind began to race.

He's always been the kind of guy that either completely ignored or repressed the hell out of complicated manners in his life. First, it was his sexuality. It was years of him ignoring his attraction to men and assuring himself it was completely normal for a guy to have a crush on other guys until he finally admitted to himself that yeah, okay maybe he's not all that straight. While it was freeing to finally admit it, he was bitter for denying himself that ability to explore that aspect of his life for so long. Then there were another few years of admitting his sexuality but refusing to actually admit it out loud to anyone. When he finally told Sam just a few years ago and was met with a "yeah, I know Dean," he realized that he did it again. He deprived himself of the happiness of being his true self. He delayed his own happiness due to his own insecurities and hang-ups.

Since they literally defeated God, Dean promised himself that he was done with delaying his own happiness. It was kind of a (for lack of a better term) come-to-Jesus type of moment. He literally died multiple times in the last fifteen years alone and it wasn't until that moment that he truly realized life is short and that he should make the best of it. Of course, it's now a lot easier to do that when there's no world-ending apocalypse or imminent battle with Heaven looming overhead.

While this new outlook on life was pretty great, it has certainly complicated things. Another thing Dean repressed the hell out of was his relationship with Cas. While Cas refers to it as a 'profound bond,' or whatever, Dean has a harder time labeling it. It's obvious they have a different relationship than Cas and Sam do, but it's just so damn confusing when he allows himself to think about it.

He just wishes that Cas was a little more transparent regarding what was going on inside his mind. With time, Dean has improved at reading his minimal facial expressions. The slight upward tick of his lips showed his amusement. His signature head tilt™ meant confusion or curiosity. The furrow of his brows indicated frustration and if accompanied with the head tilt it meant he was about to smite someone. The last time Dean saw that look, it was directed at him and Sam when they may have gotten Jack just a little bit drunk. But really, they couldn't be blamed. It was the night before they took on Chuck, and they were all under the impression it was their last night on Earth. Anyone else would have done the same thing. Well, except Eileen who signed "told you he'd be mad," with a smug look on her face. But that's not the point.

Regardless, Dean had gotten quite good at reading Cas. However, there was still a lot he didn't know. Sometimes Cas would look at him with an expression that was so foreign to Dean that he had no idea how to catalogue it. And it confused the hell out of him. Sometimes the expression would be so soft that Dean would entertain the idea that maybe Cas felt the same way as Dean does. But that look would be gone as quickly as it appeared, and Dean would convince himself he was projecting.

Dean sighed as his thoughts continued to spiral, unable to stop them. Instead, a loud pounding at the front door startled him, bringing him back to the present. Cas jolted awake as the pounding continued. He had a light flush on his cheeks as he removed himself from Dean.

His hair was sticking out in every direction, reminding Dean of that night in the barn when they officially met for the first time. He  wondered what sex hair would look like on Cas, if that's just what his regular hair looks like in the morning. Dean shook his head, effectively stopping that train of thought before it could spiral out of control. The pounding continued, more incessantly this time.

"Who the hell..." Dean grumbled, forcing himself out of bed. He threw on his discarded shirt from the floor and made his way through the living room to the front door. He swung the door open and was met with Sam's annoyed expression. "What are you --"

"Jesus, Dean. Do you plan on actually working the case or are you just going to sleep all day?" Sam brushed past Dean and brushed snow off his jacket.

"What are you talking about? What time is it even?"

"Nearly nine, Dean." He said, pulling his best bitch face. "They stop serving breakfast at 10. I thought you were going to interview guests this morning."

"Well, yeah. We were just getting ready to leave, so chill." Sam looked unimpressed and walked past Dean to the bedroom. Cas was still sitting in bed, blinking away sleep with the blankets pulled around him, effectively proving Dean wrong. "Oh, you were just getting ready to leave? Then why does Cas look like he just woke up?"

"I -- don't you have an interview to prepare for?"

Sam rolled his eyes. "Yeah, I already had it. I start later today."

"That soon?" Cas asked, his voice gravelly and rough from sleep and oh. That sound went straight to Dean's groin.

"Yeah. They're really short staffed. From what I gathered, quite a few employees quit after the last couple went missing a few days ago. It seems like they were pretty freaked out. So now they're really short staffed and pretty desperate."

"Oh, so that's why they hired you," Dean jokes. "They're desperate."

Sam just looked unimpressed. "For the love of God, would you two just get ready and go to breakfast? We have no leads and I need you to talk to the guests. When I'm at the desk this afternoon, I'll sign you up for some activities so you can talk to more guests."

Dean opened his mouth to argue that hey, he's perfectly capable of signing up for his own activities but Sam shot him a look that stopped him in his tracks. "I'll make sure you're signed up for the bourbon tasting, if that's what you're worried about."

"I knew I could count on you, Sammy," Dean grinned. With that, Sam shook his head and headed out of the cabin.

It took equal parts pleading and the promise of coffee to coax Cas out of the warmth of the bed and out into the cold so they could make it to breakfast in time. The morning brought with it a light snowfall, so Dean had to quickly brush the Impala off before driving the short distance to the main lodge where breakfast was served.

Dean and Cas waved to Brenda as they passed the front desk and waited in line to check in at the host stand. Breakfast was served in the form of a buffet with a wide variety of items offered. Dean gave the hostess their cabin number and headed straight to the eggs and bacon. He loaded up his plate while Cas grabbed waffles and coated them with syrup and whipped cream.

"You should be grateful you married me instead of Sam," Dean declared, taking a large bite of bacon as he scanned the room for an open table. "He would have lectured you for all of the sugar you're loading up on."

Cas tilted his head, seemingly thinking that over. "Yes, I suppose you're right. I don't think Sam and I would be very compatible on a lot of fronts."

Dean, meanwhile, flushed at the possible implication that he and Cas are compatible. Cas didn't seem to notice and directed his attention towards a table where a young couple were sitting, enjoying their breakfast. "Should we sit with them? Maybe they could tell us something about the couple that went missing."

"Yeah, okay. It will also get Sam off our back for a few hours." Dean followed Cas as he approached the table.

"Mind if we join you?" Cas asked, good natured. "My husband, here, overslept this morning and it seems we arrived for breakfast at the busiest time."

Dean glared at Cas for throwing him under the bus when it was actually the other way around, but there was no heat to it. In reality, his stomach did that weird swooping thing when Cas referred to him as "his husband."

"Of course!" The young woman smiled at them over her glass of orange juice. "I'm Amy, and this is my fiancé Jake."

"Nice to meet you," Dean turned on his most charming smile. "I'm Dean, this is Cas. We just arrived last night and had no idea breakfast would be so busy."

Amy laughed and shook her head. "We experienced the same thing. We found that arriving at 8:30 is the sweet spot. It's right between the early and late risers."

"Another tip: if you arrive early enough, they have cinnamon rolls. They always run out by 8:00." Jake added.

"We'll definitely remember that. Cas has a sweet tooth, as you can tell by his side of waffles he got with his syrup." Dean joked. Cas just rolled his eyes and happily ate his sugar infused breakfast. "How long have you two been here?"

"Five days," Amy chirped. "We're getting married this summer, so we wanted to have a relaxing vacation just the two of us before things get too crazy with last minute wedding planning."

"We know how that goes. We ended up having a small wedding because the planning got to be too much work for us." Cas paused and chewed thoughtfully. "Wait - so you've been here for a few days. Does that mean you were here when that couple went missing?" Truthfully, Dean was impressed by Cas' nonchalance. While his social skills have significantly improved since becoming human, there were still times that Cas had some social awkwardness. It was endearing as hell but could make working a case a little difficult. But Cas seemed to be holding his own rather well.

Jake and Amy exchanged a look. "Yeah, we actually did a cooking class with Kevin and Raymond. They were so nice and were here on their honeymoon. No one seems to have any idea what happened."

"Did you notice anything weird?"

"No," Jake answered, furrowing his brows. "Like Amy said, they were really nice and gave us a lot of great wedding advice."

"Yeah, they weren't planning on leaving for another few days, so when they were suddenly gone it didn't make sense."

"We thought they had a family emergency and had to leave early or something, but then we heard they were actually missing. It's so sad."

"Did you do any other activities with them?"

Amy smiled wistfully. "Other than the cooking class, we only did the bourbon tasting with them. I have quite the bourbon collection at home, as did Kevin so we talked a lot about that. The tasting was the last we saw of them."

Dean nodded, and steered the conversation towards bourbon and scotch, not wanting to raise any suspicion by asking too many questions.

After finishing their breakfast, Cas grabbed a to-go cup of coffee and they meandered back outside. With the fresh snowfall, the grounds looked serene and absolutely beautiful. A blanket of untouched snow coated the ground, sparkling in the sun.

"Want to explore the grounds a little?" Dean asked. "It may be a good idea to get a good feel of the layout."

"Yeah, I'd like that." Cas smiled in return and pulled his hat over his ears. The wind wasn't biting like it was the night before, but it was still December in Minnesota meaning it was fucking cold. Dean shoved his hands in his jacket pockets and followed the path around the lodge. This led to a large staircase down to the lakeside. Christmas lights were strung along the railing and there was a bonfire roaring near the lakeside, which was tended to by a few guests. Dean and Cas slowly made their way down the staircase, breathing in the crisp fresh air and enjoying the scenery.

Cas quickly finished his coffee and tossed it in a nearby trash can. Then he shoved his hands in his jacket, unsuccessfully trying to suppress a shiver. Dean fondly rolled his eyes at him and held out his hand.

"Give me your hand." He ordered. Cas looked at him questioningly but complied, nonetheless. Dean took his hand and shoved it in his pocket with his own. "Jesus, your hand is freezing."

Now it was Cas' turn to roll his eyes. "I had to finish my coffee," he reasoned.

"We need to buy you gloves."

"I'm fine, Dean."

"No, your hand feels like ice. Sometimes you forget you're human and actually need to worry about things like that."

"That's not true."

"Sure, it is," Dean snorted. "Within your first few days of being human you were dehydrated because you forgot to drink water regularly."

"You forget to drink water regularly, Dean."

Dean paused. "Okay, you have me there. But you also wore your suit and trench coat in 90-degree heat on that case in Arizona. We were in the desert and you were wearing like 4 layers."

Cas lips turned up at the corner. "Okay, you have me there." He echoed. "To be fair, I am getting better. I now dress 'weather appropriate' as Sam puts it."

"Yes, you do. I'm just sure being human takes some getting used to. But in the meantime, you need to let Sam and I help you out." Dean squeezed Cas' hand for emphasis, which was now at a much warmer temperature.

In response Cas smiled his full, blinding smile which made Dean feel warm despite the cold. "Thanks for letting me stay with you both at the bunker."

At that, Dean felt a pang of guilt. He completely mishandled the situation last time Cas was human and that was something he would never forgive himself for. "Cas, I'm sorry for --"

"No, don't apologize. I understand why you did that. You were saving Sam's life. I didn't mean to dredge that up. I just wanted to express my gratitude for allowing me to stay with you."

"You're family, Cas. We stick together." And just like that his blinding smile was back, with a certain softness in his eyes that Dean had trouble interpreting.

They now reached the bottom of the stairs and stopped at the fire to quickly warm themselves. Dean and Cas asked the few guests milling around the fire about Raymond and Kevin, but none of them had any information about the missing couple. Half of them weren't even staying at the resort when the disappearance occurred. After making a few minutes of small talk, they said their good-byes and headed back to the Impala. The cold officially seeped through their winter layers and Dean could feel his feet turning numb.

The walk back to the car was very quick and at last Dean was starting Baby and blasting the heat. He sighed in relief as warmth fanned over his red face.

"We should probably call Sam before he arrives back for work and tell him we haven't had any luck yet."

"Yeah, good thinking," Dean agreed as he pulled out of the parking spot. Cas dug out his phone and dialed Sam's number, putting it on speaker so they could both hear.

"Hey, Cas." Sam answered cheerfully. "What's up?"

Cas dutifully explained their lack of progress on the case and the dead end with the guests. "I know we haven't spoken to more than a handful of them, but I fear it will be the same with all of the guests. What are your thoughts?"

Sam hummed in thought. "I called the local law enforcement this morning while you were at breakfast, posing as a journalist and they said the same thing -- none of the guests had any helpful information. Maybe we need to switch tactics."

"What are you thinking? Cas and I pose as agents?" Dean questioned as he turned onto the gravel road leading to their cabin.

"No, law enforcement already spoke to the resort staff and they didn't get anywhere. I doubt it would be any different with federal agents." He paused as he thought for a moment. "Maybe you two should just really lean heavily into the whole married couple thing and focus on luring whatever it is that took the other couples."

"We're already doing that," Dean responded.

"No, I know. But I mean lean into it. Act so sickeningly in love so you become the obvious target. I'll see if I can get any other information from the staff, but I think that's our best angle at this point. Like I said, I'll sign you up for some couple activities over the next few days and you just need to act like you're madly in love with each other."

"Will you sign us up for the cooking class?" Cas asked. "Jake and Amy mentioned they took that class with Raymond and Kevin before they disappeared."

"Yes, I can do that. Stop by the desk after lunch and I can give you your itinerary. But I gotta go -  I have to be at the resort in less than an hour."

"Are you sure that'll be enough time to style your hair?"

"Fuck off Dean," Sam retorted humorously. "I'll see you guys later."

Cas said goodbye and slid his phone back in his pocket.

Dean chanced a glance over at Cas as they pulled up to their cabin. His brow was furrowed and he was staring out the windshield with a faraway look on his face.

"What's on your mind, buddy?"

Cas' eyes flashed in frustration. "If we're going to make people believe this is real," He said, gesturing between them. "You should probably stop referring to me as 'buddy.' Married couples don't refer to each other as such."

"Right. Sorry." Dean chewed on his lip. Cas was right. If this plan was going to work, they would have to adjust a few aspects of their friendship, this being one of them. "That's a good point. I think we were just fine this morning, but like Sam said, we need to really lean into it. So we'll have to step up our game."

"What do you suggest, we become more physical?"

Dean flushed at the implications. "Uh -- yeah, I suppose. We could hold hands more," He suggested.

Cas nodded. "Or I could put my arm around your shoulder."

"Exactly. Just do what you see other couples doing. Really, we should be fine. Once Sam signs us up for all of the couple’s activities it will be even easier to act the part."

"What about kissing?"

"What about it?" Dean's face was flaming at this point. He shifted in the seat to get a good look at Cas.

"Should we do it? Other couples do it, and it may be odd if we don't." Cas tilted his head, studying Dean's expression. "Unless that makes you uncomfortable?"

"What? N-no, not at all." Quite the opposite, actually. "I mean -- that's fine, Cas. If it feels necessary for the case, then we can, um, kiss." Dean could not believe he was actually having this conversation. He rubbed his hand over his face, trying to get his shit together. "Just do what feels natural, alright?"

"Alright." Cas agreed.

"So, we have a few hours until we have to be back at the lodge to meet with Sam. Want to see if there’s anything good on tv?”

A big smile took over Cas' face at the suggestion and he nodded in agreement. They got out of the car and made their way inside the cabin. The fresh snow crunched under each footstep but otherwise it was silent. Once they were back inside the warmth of the cabin, Cas took off towards the bedroom and muttered something about getting a blanket while Dean collapsed onto the couch.

He turned on the television and began searching through the channels, waiting for something to catch his eye. Within seconds he heard Cas’ light footsteps in the hall. He looked up just as he came into sight. Cas had their large comforter in his hands, but Dean was distracted by what he was wearing.

"Are those my sweatpants?"

Cas looked down, almost sheepishly. "Oh. Yes. You always tell me that jeans are not proper attire for movie nights. I assume the rule applies even if it's daytime, so I changed. I didn't bring any loungewear, so I borrowed yours. Is that alright?"

He eyed the pants which hung low on Cas' hips. It left a small sliver of tan skin exposed and Dean could see the sharp line of his hip bones. He inhaled sharply and forced his eyes back to Cas' face. "Yes, Cas. That's alright."

Cas' lips turned up at the corners and he flopped onto the couch next to Dean. He pulled the large blanket over the two of them and sat just close enough that Dean could feel the heat coming off of him, but they weren’t quite touching.

Since becoming human, Cas has taken to borrowing Dean’s clothes. After Dean convinced him to try on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, Cas realized just how uncomfortable the suit and tie ensemble was. With that in mind, he began sneaking into Dean’s room and would snag a band shirt and sometimes a flannel, dressing like he’s a Winchester himself.

The first time he saw him in his clothes Dean nearly had an aneurysm. He had grown so accustomed to Cas in his suit and shapeless coat that seeing him in jeans that hugged his ass with the sleeves of his flannel rolled up his forearms was an immediate turn on. Maybe it was also the fact that they were Dean’s clothes on him that caused such a problem. Regardless, Dean abandoned his breakfast to immediately take a cold shower.

And now, seeing him in his own sweatpants that perfectly hug his ass and hang low on his hips was painfully unfair. Dean readjusted himself, ignoring the heat pooling in his gut. Now was not the time for inappropriate boners. He internally groaned and tried to focus on the nature documentary Cas put on but was unsuccessful because at that moment Cas rested his head against Dean’s shoulder and let out a little sigh of content.

This is going to be a long and tortuous week for Dean because it's just pretend.

[itsclydebitches]

RWBY Recaps: Volume 8 “Strings”

Happy Saturday, RWBY friends! I am, quite obviously, going to dive into the recap in just a moment, but first I wanted to take a short detour to discuss the elephant in the tumblr room. Namely, Supernatural.

For those of you out of the loop, the tl;dr is that a fifteen year, beloved show ended with a truly horrendous finale. Specifically, the finale rejected everything that the show had been building towards: the logical conclusion to character arcs, the theme that “family don’t end in blood,” the potential for a queer romantic relationship… I could go on. The point I want to make is that the fandom had every reason to believe we’d be getting these things. This isn’t a case of fans upset that the finale didn’t go the way they wanted as an individual viewer, but rather that the finale didn’t go the way the show clearly and explicitly said it would. It’s not an exaggeration to say that in many respects, viewers were straight up lied to.

(I recommend reading the reviews.) 

What does this all have to do with RWBY? Well, I can’t help but think that history is repeating itself. Certainly there are some notable similarities between the two series. Both have long, meandering plotlines with no clear end in sight (though I hope RWBY doesn’t reach the 15 Volume mark…). Both began with a small, core cast, but quickly expanded—generating the expectation that these now equally important characters will be given their due. Both have moved from the small conflict of fighting everyday monsters to a god-based mythology. Both have a popular queer relationship dangled in front of the viewers, featuring scenes where they’re “obviously” in love… but will it ever be confirmed? Both have a fanbase that says loudly and confidently that the writers know what they’re doing. Just wait! It’s all been planned! We’ll be rewarded for our patience and soon all the naysayers will be proven wrong.

Thing is, the Supernatural fandom wasn’t rewarded. Right up until a week ago those fans—myself included—had faith that the writers knew what they were doing because they can’t really be that out of touch with their own story...right? It’s not possible. Yet they were, it was, and now that I’ve gotten solid proof of precisely how far a show can go to reject its own logic, themes, and premise, that just makes me more wary of RWBY’s mistakes. Before I had a solid faith that things couldn’t possibly get that bad, that no matter how much RWBY might be messing up in the short term, it will undoubtedly pull it together overall, because what show wouldn’t? Especially a show with such promise and, at times, wonderful storytelling. Well, Supernatural didn’t manage it and frankly I’m not sure what to do with that information.

Seriously. I don’t have any grand conclusion here. It’s not my intention to suggest that anyone should stop watching RWBY, or to claim that it will absolutely fail because Supernatural did. Obviously, we don’t know what will happen until we get to see it in the show. I only want to acknowledge these parallels and the similar journey I see both fanbases on. I can’t help but wonder if, a couple years from now, RWBY fans will be making incredibly optimistic posts about how it’s all coming together, just have some faith, everyone who says that the group won’t get a satisfying ending, or Blake and Yang won’t be confirmed are just mean trolls… only to wake up that Saturday morning and get another metaphorical slap in the face.

It’s something to think about.

But here I’ve spent a page talking about the wrong show. Let’s get into the episode!

We open on a black screen with lots of ambiguous noises. At first I thought this was Oscar struggling in the Hound’s grip or something, but then I remembered that RWBY likes to insert an episode between cliffhangers. I watched Ironwood (presumably) shoot a guy and he only came back this week (though that question still isn’t answered. At this point I kind of wonder if it will be). Oscar was kidnapped last week, which means we won’t get to see him until next week. Or… two weeks from now? RT skips the week of Thanksgiving, don’t they? Sounds familiar doesn’t it? Something horrible happens to Oscar and we need to wait two weeks to find out how it’s resolved. 

Watch him escape the Hound off screen and return to the group with a new outfit 😂

So it’s not Oscar we hear, but Ruby, the last one coming out of the tube. Weiss is in the process of pulling Nora’s ear for that stunt… with a frankly strange looking hand. What’s up with RWBY animating weird hands lately? I’m pretty sure that’s not how anatomy works.

Anyway, Nora counters that this was a “Once in a lifetime experience,” but they were all going to go through the tubes regardless. Weiss isn’t pissed that you sent her through, she’s pissed that you did it unexpectedly when she was alone, heading into enemy territory. But of course, there’s no one in the room to hinder them, so the mistake is meaningless.

We’re setting the tone again though. For the first half of this episode everything is sunshine and giddy adventure, which doesn’t fit the situation at all. It also creates emotional whiplash when I’m suddenly supposed to be super worried about things later on. This sort of about-face works once in a blue moon, as an emotional punch, like we see in Mulan: 

But RWBY does it every other episode, which makes the overall tone of the series confusing instead. Half the time RWBY feels like two different stories—the cartoony tale of girls going on fun adventures, and the traumatic tale of a fantasy war—that have been badly spliced together.

“Alight, Robo-Girl, which way?” May asks and Penny demonstrates why she’s the best for sneaking into a facility. She’s able to map out the whole place, including seeing where everyone is so they can avoid detection. Kudos to RT for going this route. I was worried that they would have Ruby and the others straight up attacking Atlas grunts, knocking them out/potentially even killing them because who cares, right? They’re the bad guys! So I’m glad they’re working to get in and out undetected. Granted, we see in some places that they’re clearly willing to fight the soldiers if it comes to that—they’re reaching for their weapons when Penny opens the final door, expecting the room to be full of people. They were going to attack—but at least they’re trying to lessen that conflict as much as possible. That’s the sort of choice I expect to see from heroes and I’m glad we got it here. 

After scouting the area Penny corrects May: “And my name is Penny,” to which Ruby gives a satisfied “Heh.” I’ve got no problem with Penny rejecting nicknames, even potentially well-meaning ones, because she’s always struggled with her status as a real girl and her name is her own. She gets to decide what others call her. I do, however, have a problem with making the presumed trans character the one who is corrected. Granted yes, we haven’t gotten confirmation in the show that May is trans, but RT doesn’t get to cash in on that rep without likewise suffering the consequences for how the character is treated. You’re telling me that a trans woman is going to roll her eyes when someone asks her to use a specific name? Please give May flaws, yes, she’s a person, but out of all the millions of flaws across the human spectrum, this is the one we’re shown? 

Not to mention Ruby’s continued attitude. It’s like, ‘Yeah, May. Stop being a horrible person who draws attention to the fact that Penny is a robot. I never did that.’ Except when Ruby first met her she didn’t know Penny was a robot. Just like she didn’t know Blake was a faunus—something we’re reminded of this episode. We might assume Ruby wouldn’t have ever made any missteps at the beginning of these relationships, but the fact remains that she got to know both girls before their minority status was ever revealed. Ruby loved them before she ever had to grapple with their differences. 

Put in her place, May then demonstrates that she can make lots of people invisible, not just herself. That’s handy. She creates an invisibility bubble that reminds me of Harry’s invisibility cloak. In the sense that others might not be able to see you, but they can still hear and touch you, which makes sneaking around still pretty challenging.

No sooner have I thought that then two guards get into the elevator with them. The group keeps quiet as the duo discusses how no one can get close to Salem’s storm without “getting shocked right out of the air.” Interesting. And frankly one hell of a roadblock if the Hound escapes into the clouds. Oscar may be gone for a while if he doesn’t escape on his own... The woman also comments about how creepy it is that all the grimm are just hanging out, waiting. It’s “worse than if they’d attacked.”

No it’s not! RT, stop trying to implement the idea that Salem withholding her forces is some epically cool choice. She should have decimated everyone by now and the fact that she hasn’t just shows how transparent the problem is: you’ve created a villain that’s too powerful and now you don’t know what to do with her.

As the group sneaks out of the elevator Nora grins and presses all the buttons, which is, as expected, a dumb move. They’re supposed to be sneaking into this base. If they’re caught they’re going to be thrown in jail at best, killed at worst, but Nora wants to risk that for a practical joke? Again and again we see this insistence on incorporating comedy where it’s not only unnecessary, but actively interferes with other aspects of the scene.

Reaching a terminal, Penny inserts her finger and gains access via Pietro’s credentials. She’s really demonstrating this episode why she’s… pretty terrifying? I mean, Penny is an incredibly powerful fighter with a computer’s view of the world, access to everything in the most powerful Kingdom alongside its information, and she now has Maiden powers to boot. Which, I should add, it took her one fight to master (because remember, the heroes are now always as strong as they need to be to win…). Now that Watts is planning to hack her, I expect her to be an incredibly formidable enemy, just given the amount she could potentially do. I think Penny herself is too kind to exploit all that potential and as we’ll see via Pietro briefly taking control, she doesn’t always have the knowledge to use the tools at her disposal. But in the hands of someone like Watts? He’ll turn Penny into the ultimate weapon.

Access granted, they learn that they have to go “Right through central command!” Of course, Penny makes it sound like a fun game and the spy-movie music/cartoon lecture doesn’t help. Again, tone. It’s adorable! It just doesn’t fit sneaking into a military base with your lives on the line while Salem waits outside. That was a RWBY Chibi moment. 

Penny explains—twice—that Ruby can use her semblance to fly them all through central command and it’s treated like a revelation. At first, I was pretty confused because Ruby has been dong this for ages? She carried Weiss in “Argus Limited” and Nora during the Geist fight. But upon close inspection, what Penny seems to have “figured out” is that Ruby can carry multiple people at once because the “mass doesn’t matter.” Okay. Not a contradiction then, though I think RT could have made it a little more clear that Ruby was shocked at the idea of carrying multiple people, not carrying someone at all.

What I do take issue with though is Ruby mastering this skill instantaneously. I mean, why is Ruby being forced to try this on the fly (pun not intended)—Penny has known the layout of the building since they made this plan. She knew they had to get past central control and that it would be packed with people. She’s obviously thought about Ruby’s semblance a great deal—and why is she succeeding? Give me a Volume 7 where Ruby actually trains in this technique, set up via Harriet’s comment early on about her semblance, and then she’s victorious here when it finally matters. Or give me Ruby assuming she can pull off this incredibly difficult skill only to fall out of her semblance halfway through, a roomful of Atlas personnel staring at them. Then what? 

Not this.

This is a character who does everything perfectly on the first try without ever having to fail. Ruby is boring like this.

Crisis averted, we transfer to Ironwood who is… working with Watts.

What else is there to say? I’ve already laid out all the reasons why this is stupid and makes no sense. Others keep coming onto my posts to explain to me how Ironwood’s awful deeds up until now fully show his decent into villainy, conveniently ignoring the numerous limitations he was under and his choice to do what he thought was best for the world using inaccurate information. Ironwood was always a divisive character and many are happy to ignore the years’ worth of deconstruction done—a man who looks like the Evil Military General but actually isn’t—because they never liked him to begin with. Not liking him is fine, no one has to like any character, but I’m honestly shocked by the number of viewers who refuse to acknowledge how bad the writing is, even if it means defending a character they hate a teensy tiny bit (#SupernaturalVibes). As a friend put it, Ironwood now feels like a caricature of his former self, a Pure Evil Ironwood who appeared out of nowhere and is now here to stay. He shoots kids. He shoots unarmed civilians. He teams up with Salem’s men and tries to hack Penny. These are undeniably horrible acts, they’ve just been given to a character who never would have done them until RT randomly flipped the Evil switch.

The “RWBY” tag, alongside all the fluff moments of this episode, is now filled with posts encouraging Marrow to turn, yelling at the Ace Ops for being “bootlickers,” and capslock screaming at anyone who dared to speak up for Ironwood. It still sucks to have bad writing twisted into an attack on the fans and it’s going to continue to suck until at least the rest of Volume 8. I’d like to again remind everyone that Qrow teamed up with Tyrian a few episodes, yet because he’s again in Ruby’s graces, that was twisted into a ‘not that bad’ situation. The issue isn’t really that Ironwood is teaming up with one of Salem’s subordinates, but that he’s doing it to go against RWBYJNOR… the second a character teams up with Salem to get what Ruby wants (to not have her team in jail) then that’s totally fine… but that’s a wrinkle a lot of people are happy to ignore. 

So yeah, Ironwood is an idiot now too. Like Qrow also was last Volume. He really thinks Watts isn’t going to betray him somehow? Although, I do wonder if the chance to ruin Pietro’s creation outweighs his loyalty to Salem, but the point is that Ironwood can’t be sure of that either. At least he’s smart enough to keep Watts under continuous guard. He puts his hand on Watts’ shoulders and goes, “I’d hate for us to have to try motivating you. Again.”

So he tortures people too now? Like I said, caricature. This was Ironwood and we were given no clear idea of where he disappeared to.

RIP a great character.

Watts notices though that Pietro has apparently accessed a secure area and alerts Ironwood to it. I laugh that the information is just ¡EMERGENCY! In large, red letters. Ironwood immediately makes an announcement for everyone to be on guard. It’s a level 3 lockdown — that won’t impede the group leaving via airship! — and they’re to use “lethal force” if necessary. Weiss is disgusted.

As much as I disagree with making Ironwood into a shoot first, ask questions later kind of guy  — he’s definitely wrong to be doing this — I also find myself rolling my eyes at reactions like that. Yes, Weiss. You attacked four operatives until they were knocked unconscious. Prevented an entire city from escaping Salem’s wrath, endangering them all. Now you’re breaking into the most classified room in the Kingdom to steal an equally qualified project and use it for your own means. There’s no reason why Ironwood would level his might against you. Is death still an extreme response? Yes. Should Weiss be acting like Ironwood is crazy for responding to them in an extreme manner? No. Her remark makes it sound like Ironwood is attacking her poor, innocent, defenseless team… not the team that’s been lying to him, betraying him, attacking him, and stealing from him. Not the team carrying deadly weapons into a facility to take what they want at any cost. 

With their presence known, May wants to go grab an airship. That’s the series now.

Meanwhile, Penny insists that they can still complete their mission and we see Nora come up with some sort of plan. 

Except, what plan was this?? What did she say to the group? ‘Hey, let’s wait around until some guy conveniently walks by with a full cup of coffee. Then we can trip him and the mug will fly alllll the way across this gap to land on a terminal, startling at least two workers. Except this guy will be hated by the whole room because he’s always messing things up—his coffee mug has been changed from #1 Dad to #1 Dud—so that this little mishap will create a ruckus that gets everyone involved, giving us the opportunity to slip by them all.’

Seriously, what? This kind of “plan” only works with someone like Clover, where we know he has a good luck semblance and thus all these unlikely pieces fall into place. I could absolutely buy Clover smiling smugly, working under the knowledge that he just has to wait around a few minutes and something will come along that works entirely in his favor. But Nora? How did she know any of this would happen? Obviously she couldn’t have, so what exactly was their intention if this coffee carrying, hated guy didn’t show up? RWBY, your contrived plots are showing.

I do, however, love the grimm Jaws poster. Jaws is an absolute favorite of mine, so seeing a reference to it in RWBY? A funny one at that? It almost makes up for how bad this episode is lol.

Because frankly I’m bored. The group sneaks around, criticizes May and Ironwood, briefly confuses me about Ruby’s semblance knowledge, and gets through tons of Atlas personnel in the stupidest way possible. I have to watch this guy running out of the room with coffee on his pants screaming, “WHHHYYY???” and he doesn’t notice the five girls standing right next to him. It’s silly. It’s boring. Luckily for RWBY, things are about to pick up in the second half.

After Ruby gets them upstairs and the final room is also conveniently devoid of people, Pietro takes control of Penny—including yellow possession eyes like Oscar has with Ozpin—and he...gets Amity started. That’s it. After a whole volume of ‘It’s not finished yet’ and ‘We barely have the resources’ and ‘Robyn stole what we were using to do idek what with’ he presses buttons for a while and they’re in. How good for them!

I do love that Penny calls Pietro “Dad” though. I’m here for the android-father relationship.

While Pietro works we turn to Blake, Weiss, and Nora. Blake tries to convince the audience that Ruby and Yang had an actual fight with, “I’ve never seen Yang and Ruby fight like this.” Yeah, because no one in this group has ever said the sliiiiightest thing against Ruby, so you all read the tinniest disagreement as a “fight” to be worried about. I mean, doesn’t RT have friends to draw inspiration from? They’ve never disagreed about Huge and Complex Questions before? Never gotten pissed and then shrugged it off the next time you want to text? RWBY’s idea of a diverse friend group feels like many other writers’ idea of a sibling relationship: anyone with an actual sibling goes, “What is this?” Speaking of, Weiss explains that sisters often have “very different ideas about what’s right” as if, again, people don’t have different ideas? Just in general? Why is this suddenly a sister thing? She’s clearly thinking about Winter, but doesn’t actually bring it up, so all we’re left with is the same situation we had last Volume. Weiss thinks she’s right, Winter is wrong, and they’re just going down their separate roads because there’s definitely no reason to re-examine any choices here. It’s all static. 

Until Winter betrays Ironwood, of course. 

Nora tries to reassure Blake that the group will be fine (ha) even though they’ve split, the irony being that we, the audience, know they just got wrecked by the Hound. Jaune is a great leader though, Oscar has grown so much, Yang could defend them all in a fight, and Ren… well, she can’t think of anything to say about Ren. I hate the Nora is acting like Ren has drawn away from her for no reason, after she chose to kiss him—without consent—rather than listening to what was bothering him, then proceeded to pretend that this mystery problem never existed. What does she expect? I do, however, like the general acknowledgement that she doesn’t know who she is without Ren. Who is Nora? Someone who is “strong and hit[s] stuff?”

See, this feels like RT writing self-consciously because Nora doesn’t have much of a personality. Oh, on a surface level she’s bursting with it, but past the bubbly exterior? That single layer? We can add maybe one thing to this “Likes Ren, is strong, hits stuff” list: she’s funny. That’s it. Anything else we might add like “she’s loyal” or “she’s kind” is just a generic characteristic of this entire team. They’re all meant to be crazy talented good guys and even the “is strong” aspect is suspect when others frequently pull off attacks as showy as Nora’s hammer hits. So who is she? What are Nora’s dreams? What are her hobbies? Her fears? Her history? We’ve seen a single flashback of her on the streets and one scene back at Beacon where she listens to music and reads a magazine. Seven years worth of material and that’s it. There’s a reason why the go-to, non-combat action for Nora in fics is “makes pancakes.” We know so little about her still. 

So I was excited for a brief, shining moment. Yes! Explore who Nora is outside of being strong and hitting stuff! … and then her big action this episode is, as she says, being strong and hitting something. Don’t get me wrong, outside of that setup it’s pretty epic. I like Nora going to those lengths to save Penny and I absolutely love the repercussions of the choice: a broken aura, passing out, and badass lightning scars all over her arms and neck (especially when women often aren’t allowed to accumulate scars in visual media). That’s pretty damn awesome. It’s just that it comes on the heels of the story insisting that Nora is more than this, that we’ll learn something new about her… and we haven’t. This is indeed cool, but we already knew that Nora was willing to crazy lengths by hitting things really hard. That’s already her established norm.

At least this moment has some really nice characterization alongside the stupidity. The conversation between Ruby and Penny is just plain stupid. Penny wants to stay to help with the evacuations, but Pietro says she should come with him in Amity. Why? As Ruby says, because then she’ll be up in the sky and Salem won’t be able to access the relic.

That’s what Ironwood wanted to do! We could have had this conflict episodes ago with you all working with him! I really can’t with this cast. Also, the rest of this is still confusing. I thought pretty much everyone was in the slums by now, so what evacuation are they talking about? Do they plan to evacuate everyone in Mantle out of the kingdom somehow… like Ironwood wanted to do with Atlas? And why are they acting like Amity is evacuating some people too? I thought they were just using it as a communication device? To add insult to injury, Ruby then contradicts herself a minute later when she tells Harriet that Ironwood can’t have the relic because “Salem will find her way to the relic no matter where you go.” Ruby, if Salem can access the relic high in the sky she can also access Penny in the sky. If you believe that literally nowhere is safe then why are you sending Penny away under the claim that she—and via her the Relic—will be safer? If you want Penny in Amity to lessen the chance of Salem getting the Relic, why can’t Penny be in Atlas while simultaneously (hopefully) getting a whole slew of people to safety? 

I’m continually confused by this “plan” of theirs. Their claims just flip-flop according to what (supposedly) contrasts them with Ironwood. Even though that’s not actually the case.

Penny is me, sad while watching this train wreck of a scene. 

So yeah, the Ace Ops are here. I’ve wondered since the trailer why Weiss looked smug while everyone else was startled. Turns out it’s because of her line, “So, your first time losing to us wasn’t enough?” I can’t express how much I dislike all the girls’ personalities now. I want to shake some compassion and humility into them. Plus, they never should have won that fight in the first place. Marrow yells, “We were holding back!” but coming from the team’s weakest member it reads as defensive. Like we’re supposed to go, ‘Lol yeah right, Marrow. Just admit you got your ass kicked,’ even tough the Ace Ops should have wiped the floor with them, holding back or not. That’s my biggest takeaway from this fight: it’s the reverse of what we should have gotten. The Ace Ops should have beaten Team RWBY with ease and struggled greatly against an android Maiden, not falling before a bunch of teens and succeeding against Penny if not for Nora’s timely breakthrough. Your half-trained cast of growing heroes should not come across as more powerful than an intelligently designed weapon now wielding magic.  

Before the fight starts we get a whole lot of lines that are, frankly, frustrating. Vine tells Penny, “I thought you were supposed to protect the people, not hurt them” which is true enough. Penny is taking action that is putting a lot of people in danger, regardless of the fact that Ruby is at the helm. Problem is, the Ace Ops then blame her for Winter’s injuries and “stealing” the power? That’s not the issue here. The issue is Penny’s blind loyalty to Ruby, but by having the Ace Ops back a stance that is clearly inaccurate—Penny didn’t cause Winter’s injuries, Cinder did; Penny didn’t steal the powers, she was encouraged to take them—it makes them come across as Very Evil people who will twist things to make poor Penny look like the villain. Even if this is a case of Ace Ops having bad intel (which seems unlikely. Wouldn’t Winter have told them what happened?) RT has avoided letting the Ace Ops take a justified stance here because that would make them look too sympathetic… even though they do have multiple justified stances to take. Like, ‘Hey, stop keeping half a kingdom here where Salem can easily kill them all’ or, ‘Hey, why did you spend months betraying Ironwood and then turn on us instead of trying to find a compromise?’ Even, ‘Why did your uncle help kill our leader?’ There’s plenty that the Ace Ops should be rightfully pissed about, so choosing Penny and Winter out of everything feels like RT is firmly backing them into Ironwood’s corner: you’re just bad now and bad people blame innocent girls, rather than acknowledging the actual wrongs done against them. 

So we have Ruby contradicting herself and the Ace Ops backing warped ideas that make them look worse than they actually are. Adding to the stupidity is the fact that Elm mentions that Winter is in “critical condition” and Weiss… doesn’t care. Harriet then tells Ruby that she’s “throwing [her] in jail right next to your uncle, runt” and... Ruby doesn’t care. Qrow is missing and Ruby just found out he’s been captured by Ironwood, yet there’s no reaction whatsoever. This show continues to go hard on the ‘screw adults’ mentality, huh? Ozpin needs to keep quiet and is horrible for coming back. Ironwood is now a cartoon villain. Winter made the wrong choice so no one cares about her anymore, not even her sister. The Ace Ops remain enemies despite trying to talk things out. Qrow? Barely know him. Who’s he? This is a Ruby loves Penny episode. There isn’t enough emotional nuance for her to care about him too.

The sad thing is I adore Nuts&Dolts. In a different context these moments would be a goldmine for me. 

If anything, this episode feels worse than the majority of last week’s because there are good things here that have been thrown into a bad setup. I can’t get excited for the group’s battles when I see who they’re attacking. It’s hard to squee over Ruby hugging Penny when she doesn’t react to Qrow. Watching Nora go all Thor feels like it only has half its potential when it’s coming out of a very messing, ‘I’m more than just being strong and hitting things… which is why I’ll continue being strong and hitting things.’ RWBY has excellent moments set into a terrible story.

The fight, at least, is exciting. The Ace Ops goad Penny into stepping away so they can trap the rest of Ruby’s team—smart—and she’s forced to hold her own while Weiss tries to break through with her knight, then Nora overloads the system. To be frank, I’m not great at analyzing combat. Not unless I’m looking for something specific like whether a win is justified. I’ve already mentioned above the broad issue of the Ace Ops very nearly beating the most powerful fighter next to Salem herself, yet failing so spectacularly against Team RWBY. Outside of that context though? I really enjoyed this. Lots of tight action, creative attacks, teamwork, some emotional pauses throughout… it feels like a pretty solid battle. Put it on Youtube as a clip, outside of the rest of the story’s messiness, and you’ve got yourself a fantastic watch. 

We can’t stay in the combat forever though. During all this Weiss calls the Ace Ops “cowards” for making it four vs. one. You know, RWBY should really just do away with dialogue and make the show purely action because the cast frequently sounds so stupid when they speak. Like her comment about Ironwood’s lockdown… really Weiss? ‘Yes, we might be wanted criminals who betrayed this group in the worst possible way, but how dare they not do the honorable thing and have three of their teammates sit out while trying to capture us? Even though the girl they’re trying to capture has magic. I mean, the nerve of them!’

Weiss, at this point I’m not sure how to explain to you that the people you’ve made into your enemies do not owe you a fair fight. 

Another detail: we get to see Ruby fall off the edge of the walkway and this time she remembers she can fly! A definite improvement from Volume 6.

Finally: by the time Penny’s eyes go full Maiden in Elm’s grip, I think we’ve seen everything from our trailer. Episode 4 will truly be a mystery.

Ironwood has, of course, been watching the fight this whole time. When it looks like the Ace Ops will lose against the team he means to send in reinforcements, but Watts says he has “a message for your operatives.” Instead of capturing Penny they steal one of her swords instead, ending with a shot on Marrow looking conflicted.

Because remember, there’s no actual moral grayness in this story. The protagonists are right and everyone else is wrong. It’s (supposedly) black and white. Which means that if the Ace Ops have any hope of surviving this Volume and being seen as anything other than evil bootlickers, they have to join with Ruby. Marrow seems primed to do that.

Am I surprised? No. Disappointed? Always lol.

May has the airship ready to go and they fly off… despite the shields. And the lockdown. Consistency? Who’s she? Nora is said to be “in bad shape” and after another hug Penny leaves to hide in Amity, even though Ruby thinks that hiding is a useless, cowardly choice. Just not when she and her allies choose to do it.

We end the episode with Watts receiving Penny’s sword and making the statement, “If you can’t beat them… then make them join you.” I have to say, his cheesy villainy is something I continue to enjoy, even if it’s heavy handed at times. Watts is just fun. I do have to say though: if Penny is hacked, what does that say about her agency? We double-downed on the ‘real girl’ narrative by giving her the Maiden powers, but she’s simultaneously synthetic enough that a single piece of her can remove all autonomy? It once again feels like RT isn’t sure what point they’re trying to make, they’re just chucking a lot of themes at the wall and seeing what sticks. Still, we’ll have to let it all play out before making any judgements.

And that’s it for this week. It seems like this is a slightly shorter recap than normal, though that may be because I struggle with discussing pure action sequences, which made up a decent chunk of this episode. I’ll no doubt return to the Ace Ops vs. Penny fight when I’m not on a self-imposed, one day deadline for posting. The only thing left is to update the Bingo Card, but I don’t think we made any headway this week. So... good job, RWBY? 

I’m still going to hold off on the civilian’s square until Salem’s army actually attacks, as well as the two day timeline square.

No Winter this episode

Watts is teaming up with Ironwood which is… so much worse than him teaming up with Jacques again. Does a square get an X if the canon is even worse than what you assumed it would be??

Maria was mentioned this episode. Jury’s out on whether she’ll actually do anything.

Atlas is still standing, we knew Penny was heading towards a hack so it’s not much of a cliffhanger, no Qrow, no Ozpin, no Neo or Cinder.

It certainly looks like we can check off “The team gets Amity up and running,” but let’s just see if there are any problems next episode. If the problem is only ‘We would have launched it if not for Salem’s attack’ or something, I’m checking it off. The point is it would have worked.

I’m also leaning towards “More obvious Blake/Yang implications without confirming a relationship” given Blake’s heart-to-heart with Nora… but let’s see if the Volume does anything more egregious.

All in all (and perhaps despite what I’ve written above), I don’t think it’s fair to totally drag this episode. As said, this feels like a strong episode in a bad story, something that I would have LOVED if a) Salem weren’t here and b) the ‘ethical dilemma’ wasn’t boiled down to a ‘Team Ruby is good’ and ‘Ironwood and everyone associated with him is evil’ situation. It’s an episode whose tone and character action belong in a different version of RWBY. If you gave us this fun episode in an earlier Volume against a Pure Evil antagonist? It would have been great. 

Ah well. It is what it is. Expect more emotional whiplash when we come back and everyone learns that Oscar has been kidnapped by Salem’s talking pooch 🙃

See you then! 💜

[dalekofchaos]

How Disney/Lucasfilm failed Finn and John Boyega

A rant about my continued frustration on how Lucasfilm/Disney failed Finn and John Boyega

John Boyega’s Finn was setup as the male lead and co-protagonist of the sequel trilogy. That’s not an opinion, that’s not a headcanon, that’s a literally fact. He was set up to be equal with Rey & Kylo’s foil and we all know why that changed.

John Boyega was cast as the male and co-protagonist of the sequel trilogy by JJ Abrams, who had to fight for John Boyega to be cast against the preferred (White) casting choices.

Originally Finn(Sam in the original treatment) was white

Majority from Okiro’s twitter thread exposing Lucasfilm’s hypocrisy when it comes to representation and black history

JJ Abrams told Finn he was the new star of Star Wars

In The Force Awakens. Finn was a Stormtrooper who defected. After witnessing the death of his friend Slip and seeing the innocents being killed, Finn made the decision to save Poe Dameron and leave The First Order. Finn only wanted to leave The FIrst Order and run away. But after meeting Poe and later Rey, Finn began to care for more than himself. Finn was mentored by Han Solo. For once, he had a father figure and a positive role model as opposed to people like Hux and Phasma. He learned to care for Rey and even love her. After Starkiller Base destroyed the Hosnian System, Finn realized running was pointless and knew he had to fight. Then Kylo Ren took Rey. Finn went to The Resistance using his time on Starkiller Base to shut down the shield generator and plant the explosives on the thermal oscillator. Finn’s main focus was rescuing Rey. After Kylo force pushes Rey into a tree, Finn faces Kylo Ren. Finn learns to overcome his fears of The First Order and faces the symbolic evil that was Kylo Ren. Although Finn does not win, he puts up a good fight and was put in a coma for daring to defy Kylo. Then they bait and switched us with Rey. I’ll let you read my rant on that.

Finn was the co-protagonist of The Force Awakens, this is evident of Finn’s actions saving everyone. Finn is the very reason why the Resistance is even alive. Finn breaks his life-long brainwashing, informs Rey and Han about the importance of BB-8 and helps out in getting BB-8 to the resistance and provides vital information that lead to the destruction of STB and gets nearly killed while helping to achieve this. If it were not for Finn saving Poe, BB-8 would’ve been scrapped for parts and Rey never would’ve left Jakku. The map would either be destroyed or be in the hands of The First Order. Starkiller Base would’ve destroyed D’Qar and Ach-To. He is the reason why Poe is still alive. He is the reason why BB-8 isn’t parts and Rey left Jakku. Because of leaving Jakku, this is the sole reason why Han and Chewie were able to find the Falcon. And he is the reason why The Resistance was able to find out about Starkiller Base’s weakness. he Helps out in sabotaging STB so that Poe, the very pilot he saved in the beginning can deliver the finishing blow to Starkiller Base and destroy it completely.

There are some missed opportunity in TFA, believe me I know as I feel JJ squandered the theme of Stormtroopers rising up against their oppressors and that crack about Finn being a janitor was so tone deaf and unnecessary. 

Don’t believe me that Finn was meant to be the co-protagonist of the Sequels? Look at the marketing?

Also. Just look at the hopeful optimism and representation FInn brought to black people.

Then the racist boycotting happened. The boycott was groups of bigots who wanted the ST to be boycotted. What was the response from Lucasfilm? Zero defense of John Boyega, but their actions were transparent when they shrunk Finn on the TFA poster for fucking China’s sake, kept him off the TLJ teaser poster, and small on the official poster

I’ll let what Rian Johnson chose to do with Finn speak for itself. John Boyega has every right to hate what Rian did with his character.

By giving into the boycott and doing their best to erase and sideline John Boyega, Lucasfilm proved they would always cater to mob law if the mob was big enough. Do I have proof of this boycott against John Boyega? Yes, I do.

Also, popular Reylo blogger Jenny Nicholson’s racism against John Boyega

Reminder that Jenny Nicholson blocked a whole fuckton of Black people who even gently criticized her about how she went after John Boyega

Did Lucasfilm after The Force Awakens try to support their Black lead in any way? No. In fact, they began to erase him harder than ever to the point Fans started a hashtag #WhereIsFinn because it was getting so bad. But Bryan Young, a Lucasfilm writer, sure loved to hate on Finn

Lucasfilm was so racist, the very concept of a Black man and a white woman getting together sent them into such a frenzy Lucasfilm had to have it removed from any EU material just to make sure they kept it nice and bigot friendly. Also it’s worth noting that Alan Dean Foster was ordered by Lucasfilm/Disney to scrap any hints of Finnrey romance from the TFA novel as he believed that was the direction of the Sequels’ romance and coincidentally they did next to nothing with and we know it was racially motivated. "I expected to see that developed further in Episode VIII [The Last Jedi]," Foster said. "And zero happened with it. And we all know why zero happened with it — and there's no need to go into it in-depth — but that's, sadly, just the way things are."

It wasn’t JJ Abrams, Lawrence Kasdan or Chris Terrio who were against Finnrey. It was Disney and Lucasfilm and RIan Johnson was more than happy to separate Rey and Finn 99% of the movie(he said and did enough things to prove that he didn’t want the two characters even near each other)

Then John spoke about his frustration with how he was treated

People have tried to twist the narrative or put words in Boyega's mouths, but his GQ interview paints the picture rather clearly. He was sidelined due to his race after The Force Awakens when The Last Jedi came around with a "reordered character hierarchy" Lucasfilm's order btw

It resulted in Rey and Kylo Ren being featured prominently in both TLJ and TROS. It also resulted in Reylo being canon. Lucasfilm killed the Sequel trilogy, cause they couldn’t bare the thought of a black man in the leading role and a interracial relationship. 

If you look at TFA, you’ll realize that Finn was built up to becoming a Jedi, Kylo’s foil and Rey’s equal. Because TLJ happened, Finn’s role was reduced to a side character and JJ could not make him as prominent as he originally wanted to. EIther studio interference or TLJ screwed everything up so bad that he had to work on it slowly and just hope that Disney + would have something for Finn.

At the start of the trilogy, we all thought people of color would have a prominent role in the new trilogy, there was a potential for the first interracial relationship in Star Wars and there was a potential for the first LGBT relationship in Star Wars. But no, it’s clear that both TLJ and TROS gave us the impression that only white people can be Jedi and only white people can have epic romances and save the galaxy, people of color can only have secondary roles. And the blink and you miss it kiss? Only white women, not two men of color who clearly love each other.

Finn’s best scenes were deleted. 

Finn and the villager. it really shows why Finn chose to leave. Finn’s reasoning for leaving the First Order had nothing to do with being against violence, but a moral confliction of not wanting to hurt defenseless people. This villager wasn’t a soldier, wasn’t trying to hurt him. She was just a woman with her baby. This wasn’t war, this was murder, and Finn refused to be a murderer.

TLJ alternate opening. Opens with Finn waking up. Small change, but it would show that Finn is still a prominent character.

BB-8 shows Finn Rey’s last moment with him. BB-8 tries to cheer Finn up, but to no avail until he shows him a recording of Rey from the end of The Force Awakens - the scene she says goodbye to an unconscious Finn and kisses him on the forehead before leaving to find Luke Skywalker.

Poe gives back his sewn up jacket to Finn. In this deleted scene, Poe fills in the gaps and tries to assuage Finn about his concerns, including Finn's mixed feelings about his relationship with the Resistance. Poe then gives back the jacket that was once his and became Finn's in The Force Awakens, showing Finn that he sewed it up. This scene doesn't necessarily push forward any plot development, but should've remained as great a moment between Finn and Poe. The two characters established a wonderful chemistry and bond in The Force Awakens, and with Finn off on Canto Bight for much of The Last Jedi, fans didn't get to see as much of their relationship as expected. It's nice to see that chemistry and bond again. Finn's question about winning is also interesting in highlighting the constant uphill battle of the Resistance. Even destroying the Starkiller Base, Rey defeating Kylo Ren, and blowing up a Dreadnought can still put the Resistance in the position of fleeing. 

The elevator scene between Finn and an old Stormtrooper friend.  A Stormtrooper voiced by Tom Hardy recognizes Finn and starts talking to him. Finn starts to draw his gun, thinking the Stormtrooper has recognized him as a traitor, but it turns out the Stormtrooper is just surprised to see that FN-2187 has become an officer. The scene may go on for a bit too long, but ultimately it should've stayed in. The scene in the elevator does a great job playing with the audience's emotions, as they're unsure whether the tension will rise to the breaking point of a fight or evolve into a humorous moment. It also shows Finn using restraint by not killing a fellow Stormtrooper, unlike the other two movies.

Phasma’s alternate and BETTER death scene. WHY WAS THIS CUT????? No seriously, WHY WAS THIS FUCKING CUT????? I will never understand why this was deleted. Finn calls her out about her betrayal of lowering the shields and when this information is revealed, the Stormtroopers near her look suspicious and it looks as if they are going to turn on her. Phasma like the ultimate survivalist she is kills them with no hesitation. Finn cuts her hand off and blasts her into the abyss, giving Phasma a more deserving and better send off. Seriously, this is way better than their actual confrontation.  What I really like about this scene is its direct connection to The Force Awakens plot point and that it acknowledges Phasma's survivalist attitude which was introduced into her novel. The Phasma novel and comic portrayed her not as a First Order loyalist, but as a ruthless warrior who did whatever it took to survive. She even went so far as hunting down and doing away with those within the First Order who had knowledge of what she did at the Starkiller Base lest the truth get out. Phasma was always about self-preservation, she wasn't about preserving the First Order, but that never comes across in The Force Awakens or The Last Jedi. It only comes across in this deleted scene where Phasma chooses to end her own Stormtroopers to save herself.

Something else that bothers me. Finn’s treatment in the expanded universe. Have you ever noticed that Poe and Kylo got all the big expanded universe material and Finn is always shoved into the background or not there at all? Even worse, every form of media portrays Finn as Poe's bumbling sidekick, which is even more apparent in TROS. They were more interested in having Poe and Finn being the Abbott and Costello of the ST instead of letting Finn going from Stormtrooper to Jedi and lead a Stormtrooper Rebellion.

In the journey to TROS, Finn is not featured in ANY of the novels or graphic novels for the Journey to TROS. When he was, he was used as Poe’s sidekick and not featured anywhere with Rey. Before the release of the movie, he is not featured whatsoever in any shape or form in marketing. We get to see him in two teasers but he says nothing. His new outfit looks awesome. Finn could’ve been used to rise as a Jedi with Rey and essentially be the Skywalkers that Rise and face Kylo and Palpatine together. If not that, Finn could’ve caused a Stormtrooper Rebellion that burns The First Order from the inside out. Instead of any of that, it Finn was given nothing for this movie. He doesn’t even get to face Kylo Ren, their rivalry as foils was completely dropped. That is sad and heartbreaking.

Seriously, there is no novelizations or comics that expand on Finn’s time in The First Order. Sure, there is Before The Awakening. But consider this. Finn was their best Stormtrooper, so good that Hux considered him Captain material.

There is so much potential with Finn in the Expanded Universe. Apply all the posts I’ve linked and more.

The Poe Dameron comics were not about Poe’s life, they were about his personality, skills, character, and the Resistance. So I ask, why can’t/couldn’t the same have been done with Finn pre TFA? A comic series exploring his character while world building the First Order.

There is so much to tell. You could start with Finn vividly remembering his family and how he was abducted and recruited for the FN Corps.

You could even show the ruthlessness of The First Order by showing initiation for the FN Corps is only granted by forcing the children to kill each other in a Hunger Games/Battle Royale to see who the strongest and who deserves to be welcomed to the First Order. This would be in separate groups of the children who are abducted to determine who gets to be put in the FN Corps. We could see Phasma returning to the room, only to see a young Finn covered in blood and dried up tears. Phasma will only say “Welcome to The First Order, FN-2187.”

Wouldn’t it be interesting to see how Finn, a brainwashed soldier broke free of his mental conditioning, learned the truth of the FO yet still tried to be a good soldier. It could flesh out his relationship with the squad he led, as well as Phasma and Hux.

It could’ve also showcased the brotherhood and friendship Finn had with  FN-2199 (“Nines”), FN-2000 (“Zeroes”), and FN-2003 (“Slip”).

The biggest thing it could do is finally show Finn’s skills as a soldier, his brains, while giving so much needed world building First Order. We could also finally show what it’s like as a FO stormtrooper from a sympathetic POV.

Through the avenue of a Finn comic series you could also flesh out Hux, Phasma, Nines, Zeroes, Slip, and even characters like Kylo and Snoke. It doesn’t have to cover spoilers, just make the one note more dimensional while giving Finn so overdue respectful content

It could end with everyone asking Finn “what was the moment you decided to leave” which then we would see the TFA deleted scene of Finn in the village 

It could end on Finn saying "I was raised to do one thing, I used to think I’ve got nothing to fight for, but now I have something worth fighting for.“

And afterwards. You could show Finn and Jannah working together to liberating the other Stormtroopers. The first person they rescue? Zeroes, FInn’s last surviving Squad Member and together they awaken and liberate their brothers and sisters and all the while Finn rises up and becomes a Jedi!

For those wondering what about Finn in TROS? I’ll let this video do all the talking

I’d also like to point out. Finnrey WAS going to happen in TROS. Here’s confirmation by Jedipaxis, the main reddit leaker, who was right about everything before the films release, confirmed that Finn’s “i never told you” line was supposed to have some payoff and it was going to end with finn and rey holding hands. could this pic have been of the alternate ending? then reshoots happened and we got the Reylo kiss

I’m convinced that John Boyega was told by the higher ups to say Finn was meant to say he was “Force Sensitive” no one who is about to die would “always want to tell you” they were force sensitive. 

Hell, even in the original Episode IX by Colin Trevorrow. Duel Of Fates. Finn was given the shaft again. For some unknown reason, Rey is paired with Poe, a character who barely interacts with Rey at all. Finn was given another sidequest to do. The only brightside for Finn is he participates in retaking Corruscant and a Stormtrooper Rebellion near the end. 

Finn, who was once held in prominence as the co-protagonist alongside Rey. Was erased from how prominent he once was and reduced to a sidecharacter due to China and fanbacklash that there was going to be a black lead in Star Wars. Disney caved in to the racist backlash and caved into China’s racist demands. 

Finn deserved to be a main character alongside Rey, while Kylo Ren is their villain. He deserved a good character development, a great arc, an interesting backstory. he had the potential to become one of the most epic star wars characters. TLJ and TROS was an insult for him and he deserved better. nobody will EVER change my mind.

Finn should’ve been a Stormtrooper turned Jedi who embraced the light, while Kylo Ren who was the Skywalker who rejected the light and embraced the dark. Rey should’ve been Luke’s daughter, while Finn is the Jedi who builds himself up from being a Stormtrooper from nowhere to Jedi and together Rey and Finn stop Kylo Ren and bring down The First Order and rebuild The Jedi!

Finn should have been a Stormtrooper turned Jedi.  It doesn’t matter that you think it tells a better story for him to not be a Jedi. “Finn being a hero who is not a Jedi is important.” Poe and Rose are great examples of ordinary heroes coming from nowhere. Rey was supposed to be a jedi related to Skywalker or Kenobi legacy while Finn was the perfect “nobody from nowhere” that becomes a Jedi. And honestly, Black kids deserved to see themselves in the Black Jedi and black kids deserved to see themselves as one of the three protagonists of the trilogy.

Finn got no last name No theme Was sidelined in the trilogy Had his scenes cut Mocked by Lucasfilm employees Racially harassed by bigots and media outlets Disney used while staying silent and then Disney has the nerve to say they “stand” with John Boyega during the BLM movement and celebrated Finn during black history month despite squandering him....

Finn deserved better, period!

[thepapergirlandthespiegelman]

Deadly starstrand and “toxic” people

It’s transparently clear that when Julian asks if we still want the starstrand, even knowing its poisonous properties, that what he really means is: Do we still want him, knowing that he could hurt us? It’s not a subtle metaphor. Not even slightly.

It’s another one of his edgelord theatrics, certainly; it’s not especially original or necessarily deep to try to flirt with someone by employing the “I’m so dangerous~” archetype. But like all of Julian’s theatrics, it has a meaning. You have to draw on what you know, after all. And as we’ll see later on in the story, this isn’t simply donning the trappings of danger for the sake of a seductive aesthetic. Julian really believes that he is dangerous. And he’s not actually okay with that, as much as he tries to pretend otherwise.

I’ve been thinking a lot about the term “toxic person” lately, and this little side story ties in quite neatly to that discussion. The apprentice points out that Julian said that the starstrand’s poison needs to be distilled in order to be potent; this is a simple illustration of the basic principle, “The dose makes the poison.” I think that dosage is actually quite an appropriate concept to bring into play, though I think the relevant related concept is less distillation, but rather sensitization.

When I look back at the “toxic” people in my life, there’s really only been one: my mother. There’s nothing quite like spending the most vulnerable years of your life under the crushing boot of abuse, is there? And enduring that, with little reprieve, for nigh 18 years.

When I reflect on my mother’s behavior in recent years, I often find myself struggling to justify to others how terrible it truly is. After all, I no longer live with her. She cannot physically control me anymore, dictating my living space and when I’m allowed to come and go. A lot of the time, what bothers me these days is no more than a rude gesture, like taking back all of the Christmas presents that she bought for me because I didn’t express sufficient appreciation for them. It is a terribly rude thing to do, yes, but I’m a grown fucking woman. Why should it matter if my mother denies me Christmas presents? I can buy my own presents now.

Other times, what bothers me is nothing more than an inappropriate comment, often some unsolicited advice. Why should it bother me if she nags me about what she believes is the appropriate career path for my partner? Again, it’s terribly rude. It’s inappropriate and disrespectful and annoying. It ignores my partner’s right to self-determination, and it disregards the fact that she has given this advice, and I have acknowledged it, quite a few times already. But it should not feel like a knife is being driven into my soul to hear an inappropriate comment. If anyone else were to say the exact same words that were coming out of her mouth, I would probably laugh, or perhaps smile politely and quickly leave the room.

But that’s the ticket, isn’t it? It’s not someone else, and this isn’t the first time. Whenever she does something irksome, it’s never the first time. She’s been denying me love and autonomy, explicitly and implicitly undermining all aspects of my psychological health, my whole life. It’s one more insult added to a lifetime of injuries; it’s straw after straw after straw being piled on top of a camel whose back has been broken for some years now.

Any of these “poisonings” are things that, individually, a person might be able to withstand with a little to no effort. They do not have massive destructive power inherently. But to someone like me who has been suffering these abuses for years, I find myself nearly brought to tears with unfortunate regularity. My “liver” for this particular variety of abusive behavior, so to speak, is constantly working overtime.

This brings me to my old ex. He was arrogant, took his 4.0 GPA and other markers of academic success for granted, looked down on others who he saw as less intelligent or less virtuous than himself. He frequently took the lead in our relationship, and he employed a variety of different masks in order to make himself more appealing to others, including me...especially me.

Some of these things are inherently troubling, but none of them, I don’t think, are definitive indicators of a truly evil person. None of them are inherently absolute dealbreakers.

But for me, who grew up with a tiger mom who constantly stressed the importance of academic success and whose approval I constantly struggled, but usually failed, to win, the fact that he was academically talented, effortlessly so, and arrogant about these positive qualities, was as catastrophically destructive to me as it was, simultaneously, irresistibly seductive. I became obsessed, often openly, with rectifying what I perceived as my own failings by either using him as a trophy boyfriend (“I may not be that smart, but my boyfriend’s a genius!”) or trying to discover whatever secret he had that enabled him to be not only functional but exceptional. And eventually, these volatilities led to conflict, suffering on both sides, and the end of the relationship, in an unbelievably protracted and painful breakup.

What he had was incredibly, powerfully toxic to me. But I think that a lot of that can be attributed to my particular sensitivity to his particular brand of poison rather than something inherently toxic about him.

I think that this is important to acknowledge, not only because it’s bad to villify people, but also because not all poisons are created equal. Someone once said: “Healers and poisoners are folks with similar skill sets and wildly different philosophies.” x

The very same substance, in differing dosages, applied to different people, can be either salutary or harmful.

I had also been batting around in my brain an idea for a joke post along the lines of, “Millennial/Gen Z love is finding someone with compatible trauma to yours.” But now I begin to think to myself, maybe that just is what love is, period. It’s not novel to say that love is finding someone whose brokenness, whose jagged edges, happen to fit together with yours. I’m sure you can find a myriad of literary musings on this theme. I think, maybe, what has changed is that people are only now starting to talk about this in the (relative) mainstream.

But back to the point: A person who is “toxic” to one might be not only nontoxic to another but actually medicinal. And this is what makes it so brilliantly satisfying that Julian is, in fact, a doctor! Because he does deal with “poisons,” but those poisons are exactly what will heal me. Many (though not all) of the same qualities and actions that made his relationship with Asra a complete dumpsterfire can be shamelessly lavished upon me because I am not only immune to them but ravenous for them.

Anyway, those are my thoughts. Julian is lovely, and the writing in The Arcana is shockingly good sometimes. It has permanently raised the bar for all visual novels for me, which is really unfortunate, because I don’t think I’m going to easily find something like this again.

[jbuffyangel]

Strength: Arrow 8x05 Review (Prochnost)

We’re headed back to Russia for some Queen family vacation fun, except their version of “fun” is kidnappings and fight clubs.

Let’s dig in…

Oliver, Mia and William

Do you remember how we used to pray for a scene of Oliver teaching Felicity the bow and arrow? 

The scenes with Helena fueled my hate fire for years. The closest we ever came to Olicity “training” was Oliver offering Felicity a few punching pointers

and the glorious salmon-ladder-leads-to-sex scene.

I’m not complaining! All I’m saying is we could’ve had a bow-and-arrow-training-leads-to-sex scene too. I have several insert-scenario-here-leads-to-sex scene ideas this show has yet to explore.

Anyway, if we can’t have Felicity training with Oliver then second best is their daughter training with Oliver. The intro to “Prochnost” is almost three minutes long and it’s pure fan fiction from start to finish.  

Source: felicitysmoakgifs 

Oliver teaches Mia how to tennis ball and uses cooking as analogy before he remembers she’s 50% Smoak.

It is clear Mia still has a lot to learn not only from a vigilante perspective, but also in terms of her archer skills.  

When we met Oliver Queen in the pilot his skill set was perfected. He was a fully formed bad ass. 

We haven’t seen Mia train other than a montage with Nyssa Al Ghul in 7x16 and I am thoroughly enjoying there’s still a lot she can learn from her father.

Source: 1-crazy-dreamer

Oliver reviews all of his trick arrows with Mia, but doesn’t want them to become a crutch. 

Source: lucyyh 

What he doesn’t say is trick arrows became more of a necessity in disabling criminals after killing them was no longer an option. We’ve come a long way with Oliver Queen. If you had told me father/daughter training sessions were in our future when I watched the pilot then I would’ve laughed you out of the room because that’s a special brand of CRAZY.

Of course, a training scene without the stick thingies wouldn’t be a training scene on Arrow. 

Source: miasmoakdaily

Yes, I know there’s a technical term for the stick thingies, but if I haven’t learned it by now do you think I ever will? No is the right answer.

Oliver: Nyssa taught you well.

Mia: Mom made sure of it.

I think Arrow makes an important point during this scene. Nyssa Al Ghul is good, but she’s no Oliver Queen. There’s been many seasons where it feels like the writers down played Oliver’s skills to give the other team members something to do *cough*L*urelLance*cough*. 

However, the writers seem particularly focused on showing how Oliver’s skills are a whole other level now. Remember, he’s the guy who killed Ra’s Al Ghul – probably the greatest fighter of all time. It’s why Riccardo Diaz being a formidable threat was so laughable. When Felicity reached out to Nyssa she was asking the best for help, but there truly is no substitute for Oliver Queen.

Source: miasmoakdaily 

Mia “The Machine” Smoak-Queen (her official title btw) doesn’t need a break, but I love how Oliver worries about her nonetheless. DADDY OLIVER IS SO SOFT.

Source: amunetblack

Mia gently reins in William’s ramble and this is the brother/sister banter I am here for. Look, I know we’ve clocked a season and a half with these kids and I should be used to moments where they remind me of Oliver and Felicity, BUT I CAN’T GET USED TO IT. It still fills me with absolute glee anytime it happens.

Children are individuals with unique personalities, but one of the more fun aspects of parenting is seeing traits of other family members, or maybe even yourself, emerge in the child you’re raising. I feel the same glee when my daughter reminds me of my husband or mother. And since William and Mia are my fictional TV children why should I be any different?

There’s a Curtis reference in this scene, so naturally I doze off when that happens, but the cliff notes version is the energy wave that destroyed Earth 2 can be recreated. There’s a Russian general trying to replicate it via pulse wave generator weapon and Team Arrow needs to get the plans.

I think. Plus they need plutonium which Diggle volunteers to get.

Oliver invites the kids to Russia with him and they are equally as shocked as I am. 

Really? We’re going to Russia? I mean, I know we’re going to Russia, but Oliver’s casual invitation makes this trip sound like the equivalent of a grocery store run. The kids are so excited to be invited they think they’re going to Disney World with Dad.

This is so not going to be Disney World. TELL THEM THIS IS NOT GOING TO BE DISNEY WORLD OLIVER.

Oliver: I’m a better man. Different man. I think I can teach them the good without showing them the bad.

Oliver thinks this is going to be Disney World. 

Diggle accurately points out visiting the place which was home to the darkest point of his life may not be as simple as Oliver would like it to be. His answer is equally wonderful and sooooo WRONG. It’s WONDERFUL Oliver believes he’s a better man. It took us 8 long years to get here and his statement is no small thing. Round of applause for our boy.

Unfortunately, this is where the wonderful ends. Oliver is determined to only show his children the good. I guess it sounds ok when he says it, but upon closer examination it misses the forest through the trees. Everything that happened to Oliver Queen, good and bad, has formed the person he is. He cannot extricate the bad from this story anymore than he can the good. They are a sticky wicket forever entwined together. Take out one and you don’t get the full picture. And what his children need and deserve is the full picture.

That’s not to say Oliver’s filter is entirely wrong. There are certainly topics and information children are not ready to hear, can’t understand, or wouldn’t be appropriate to tell them. Every parent has some kind of filter when raising their children because that’s what good parenting requires.

This is appropriate when children are small. As your child grows into an adult then your relationship with them must become more adult, which requires more transparency. This is the problem between Oliver and his children. He is parenting like William and Mia are still little. And they are not.

If plans for a pulse generator sound like a flimsy excuse to go to Russia then you’d be right. The real reason we’re going to Russia isn’t because of some rando general. It’s to say goodbye to one of Arrow’s greatest supporting characters - Anatoly Knyazev

“My brother.”

I block out most of Season 6 because half of it was a walking horror show, so I don’t remember where Oliver and Anatoly left things after he joined and then betrayed Team Bad Guy. 

I guess their cool now? I don’t really want to spend all kinds of time on Oliver and Anatoly hashing out their issues, so if a hug gets the job done then I’m good. Also William speaks Russian. Queen men speaking foreign languages is hot.

A+ reaction Steve. 

Source: arrowdaily 

Anatoly was bored in the Maldives, now owns a bar and has a delicious pina colada recipe so that pretty much catches us up on him. He offers to help find Burov, but Oliver doesn’t want Anatoly’s “friends” involved because they are Bratva and he’s not discussing the bad parts of Russia with his children. I think the good parts of Russia ended at pina colada, Oliver. See how this is going to be a problem?

The best place to meet up with Burov is a local fight club. This prompts William to share where he met his baby sister and gives us Oliver’s best dad reaction to date. 

Source: 1-crazy-dreamer 

Bless you William. You do God’s work my boy.

Mia: Why did you bring us on this mission if you aren’t going to let us help?

Oliver: This is the Bratva. They are terrible people and you guys are my kids.

Mia: Yes, but we’re not children.

Oliver: Well you are when I look at you.

Aww… my sweet, lovable, wonderful Oliver. 

Do we ever stop looking at our children as children? Probably not. I know I will always be my parents’ baby girl and my daughter will always be mine. It is difficult to fully accept a human being as an adult when you’ve changed their diapers. And in Oliver’s defense he changed Mia’s diaper about five minutes ago in the present timeline, regardless of the future adults standing before him. We must give him some time to… adjust.

But Mia is Mia and doesn’t listen to anyone, other than William (SOUND FAMILIAR?) and he’s firmly on her team this week, so they go to the fight club and watch Dad in action. Mia has heard the stories of her father all her life but seeing him in action is an eye-opening experience. She is difficult to impress, but her dad is AWESOME. Yeah, we think so too honey. Welcome to stanning Oliver Queen.

Source: olivergifs

Unfortunately, the Bratva aren’t cool with the deal Oliver made with Burov and kidnap him along with Mia. Her Spidey sense was tingling, so she went to check on dad. Oops.

Source: feilcityqueen 

If there is one lesson the Arrow villains consistently fail to learn it’s DO NOT MESS WITH PEOPLE OLIVER QUEEN LOVES. He gets very angry and wildly unpleasant, which leads to many broken bones and occasionally murder. You put hands on Felicity Smoak and even I’m down with Oliver ripping off your head.

Of course, Oliver wakes from unconsciousness and his immediate question is if Mia is okay. Can’t-Admit-I’m-In-Love-With-You Oliver, 

Boyfriend Oliver,

Fiance Oliver, 

Ex-boyfriend Oliver, 

Husband Oliver, 

and Dad Oliver  are all the same Olivers.

Mia doesn’t understand why everyone in Russia knows who Oliver is and quickly deduces Dad was Bratva. Our princess is a smart cookie! Oliver is ticked Mia didn’t listen to him and there is truly no greater justice in the world than God creating a child who is exactly like you. Robert and Moira are having themselves a nice little chuckle.

Source: lucyyh 

The Bratva threatens to torture Mia if Oliver doesn’t tell them what’s on the zip drive. Mia is very brave and tells Daddy not to say anything. Pfft. Not likely Little Miss Square Bear. He points a gun at Oliver’s precious girl and counts down from five. The Green Arrow breaks like a pretzel. Honestly, I’m shocked Oliver didn’t give the guy the whole store after four.

Source: olicitygifs 

Unfortunately, nobody believes Oliver is telling the full story and a very large knife is brandished in Mia’s direction. Seriously? The one-time Oliver tells the truth he’s accused of lying. How ironic is that? The goon was at least 20 feet away from Mia, but Daddy was ready to flay him alive seven different ways. 

Oh. He was only cutting the restraints. Okay, we’ll knock down the flaying to five different ways.

The Bratva force Mia to play the Ring the Bell game. I don’t know if that’s what it’s called, but it works for my purposes. Oliver is very much HELL NO CHILD, but really her only other option is death. Of course, if she doesn’t ring the bell she dies too. ISN’T RUSSIA FUN? 

Mia kicks major ass, but is unable to ring the bell in under 60 seconds. This might have something to do with her wasting time to look back at the clock and then waiting an additional 3 seconds to reach for the friggin bell, but that’s just details. Be less stupid Arrow.

The Bratva don’t shoot her because… they’re nice gang of Russian mobsters now? 

Source: arrowdaily

This made very little sense other than Arrow doesn’t want to shoot the female lead of their new television show. On second thought, good enough for me. Oliver shoots death daggers at the man who scared the friggin bejesus out of him and it’s pretty much a certainty he will be flayed eight different ways.

William has a full-on panic attack over his father and sister’s kidnapping and it’s pretty much the cutest thing ever.  Then L*urel actually provides some necessary and helpful information. Is that the second week in a row this happened? I’m scared fandom. Hold me.

L*urel: Aren’t the people in your family constantly injecting each other with tracking devices?

William: Normally I would say God I hope not, but now I guess I can see the advantages.

He’s able to track them down, but L*urel and Anatoly show up right after Oliver has already freed himself by dislocating his thumbs. I love that trick. Mia’s reaction is the perfect combination of horrified and impressed. She really wants that trick to be on the next lesson plan.

Mia is bumming hard over not ringing the bell and boozes it up with some scotch. THY NAME IS GENETICS.

Oliver has had enough of his kids almost dying and is putting their asses on a plane back home BECAUSE THIS ISN’T DISNEY WORLD. 

William jumps firmly on Team Mia and reminds their father he’d be dead without them. Oliver has been dislocating his thumbs on his own for awhile now children. I think he’d survive without your help.

It’s time to set these kiddies straight.

Source:  oliverxfelicity

Mia tries to argue the whole adults saving the city angle, but that’s not going to fly in this timeline cupcake. 

In this timeline, Oliver smooshed those perfect chubby cheeks one more time before he left to save the universe 

Source:  oliverxfelicity 

and his rebelling teenage son, who was ousted from the present storyline to make a ridiculous plot point work in the future storyline, ignored his phone calls. (I’m never getting over the whole William never moves in with Mia and Felicity thing. NEVER.)

So, all of his children can take several seats and do what they’re told or they will be grounded! That includes no computer for you, William and Oliver will be taking that bow and arrow back little miss Mia.

Side note: This was a perfect time for William to explain WHY he didn’t return any of Oliver’s calls or if he even received them, but NOPE. Why would these writers attempt to clean up this mess of a storyline with reasonable explanations? Better to just ignore the Grand Canyon sized plot holes and keep driving through. 

Stephen Amell does a wonderful job in this scene as Oliver’s voice quivers with emotion. He’s skating the edge of keeping his composure and losing it all together perfectly this season. Neither Mia nor William have offered much understanding for where Oliver is coming from. Yes, they are adults but 1) No matter how old they get they will always be Oliver’s children and 2) HE MISSED TWENTY YEARS.  

Oliver has been very clear this was not a choice he wanted to make. Mia and William are not the only ones who lost something precious. Oliver lost a lot too. Part of being an adult is letting go of the natural narcissism we all have as children. So, if Mia and William want to put on their big boy and big girl pants then they need to show their father a little understanding and compassion.

Mia: And because you made the choice to protect us I had to spend my whole life alone. I didn’t have a chance to get to know my brother to get to know you.

Mia is not ready to do that yet. She throws Oliver’s choices in his face once again. He is still the one she wants to blame. If this reaction frustrates you then that’s understandable because Mia is supposed to be frustrating right now. It’s odd for us to be identifying through Oliver, but that’s what happens when the hero becomes fully evolved. This entire episode is about showing how much Mia still has to learn not only physically, but emotionally too.  

Source: oliverxfelicity

Oliver is getting used to Mia’s blame by now and it doesn’t really change his opinion on this situation. The worst part of this argument is Oliver believing his children hate him. His worst nightmare was Mia and William not understanding his choices and resenting him for it. Oliver’s greatest fear isn’t death. It is his children believing he abandoned them.

Mia being angry at Oliver over not growing up with William is really not his fault and it’s bizarre how the writers are insistent on lumping that in with everything else she’s ticked about. I did a deep dive on Mia’s emotional and psychological viewpoint last week and I won’t repeat it here because everything still stands. But how is Felicity never going back for William Oliver’s fault?

I’m not putting the blame on Felicity here either. It’s a ludicrous plot point that makes absolutely no sense, so it’s pointless to even try to argue the logic. And yet, that’s exactly what the writers keep trying to do. But it merely shines a brighter spotlight on their illogical reasoning behind the decision.

We are already sympathizing with Oliver because we know how heartbroken he was to leave his children. We know he sacrificed everything for a bunch of ungrateful twats who caught a lucky break for existing in the universe. But forcing Mia’s character to continually blame Oliver for EVERYTHING can rapidly make this character unlikeable. Particularly since her father left to SAVE THE UNIVERSE. The writers need to tread carefully. This has the same nonsensical threads of the Season 4 break up. Or, even worse, Mia channeling the same the anger/blame/bitterness of Season 1 & 2 L*urel Lance. Nobody wants a repeat of those hot messes.

Oliver is floundering. He missed twenty years of his children’s lives. They’ve arrived from a different time as adults. Oliver was still learning how to be a parent and then the universe flipped the board. He has no idea how to do this and the one person who can help him isn’t here. If there was ever a time Oliver needed his Felicity this is it.

So, the only guiding light Oliver has right now is the promise he made his wife and mother of his children. 

Source: oliverxfelicity 

Not to get too nitpicky on the details Oliver, but as @callistawolf​ pointed out in our Watchover episode of 8x05, we never heard him make any promises to Felicity about the children. 

In their final goodbye, it was Felicity promising Oliver to do whatever was necessary to keep their children safe (re: Nyssa Al Ghul). So, let’s just create our own head canon there was some Olicity discussion about the future kids being in present day off screen and he made the promise to her then. Cool? Cool.

OR Oliver is merely trying to score points in an argument via emotional manipulation, which hey man. More power to you. Whatever it takes to keep kiddos safe, I guess. I did have to chuckle about Oliver keeping his promises to Felicity NOW that she’s off the show. Where was this guy in 6x23? Or maybe I sobbed quietly. Probably a little of both. Regardless of the reasoning, it’s an EPIC speech. Dad for the win.

Oliver decides it’s time to get boozy. Amen brother. Pass the scotch. 

Anatoly is no Felicity Smoak, but in the ever-spinning weekly wheel of characters trying to fill her role, he asks the obvious question. Is Oliver sending his children home because he believes they cannot handle Russia/vigilantism/life?

Of course, the answer has been obvious from the moment Oliver decided to only share the good. It’s not about what his children can handle. This is about what Oliver can handle.

Anatoly: That is understandable. You’re ashamed. You have truly done some terrible things.

Oliver: Thank you for the reminder.

Anatoly: But you also have done some good things. It’s important that the kids see both.

Can’t you just hear Felicity Smoak saying these lines? Only in an adorable ramble and less booze? I miss her. Just leaving this here.

I absolutely understand Oliver’s refusal to share the darkest moments of his past. It’s not like my dad has gone chapter and verse into his Vietnam experiences. But I know he was there. I know some of the stories. Maybe Oliver doesn’t need to go into detail about the time he skinned a guy, but he can be honest with his children about being in the Bratva.

Anatoly: That’s the thing about teaching. It’s not about what you want to say. It’s about what they need to hear.”

This part of the speech is all Anatoly. 

Source: 1-crazy-dreamer 

He taught Oliver living was not for the weak because this was the lesson Oliver needed to hear.  Maybe he missed out on teaching William and Mia how to tie their shoes or ride a bike, but nobody understands what it means to be a hero better than Oliver Queen. The Crisis is coming and if Oliver is marching slowly but steadily to his death then he must pass on all he’s learned. There is still so much to teach Mia and William about Oliver’s life and who he is. Those lessons can only come from their father.  What William and Mia need to hear is the truth.

“You were so little. I think that’s what I’ve always wanted all these years. Is for you just to stay little, quiet and safe. But you’re not any of those things. You’re loud and fearless and it scares the crap out of me.” Derek Shepherd, Grey’s Anatomy

His children are loud and fearless and it scares the crap out of Oliver Queen. But there’s a deeper fear driving his hesitation. Oliver is afraid that if he tells Mia and William the truth about his past then they’ll only hate him more. He is constantly afraid of losing his children’s love.

But truth is the path to understanding. Anatoly is right. Oliver must give Mia and William a chance. The real truth is there’s nothing he has done or will ever do that will make his children stop loving him. Sure, Mia is angry at Oliver, but she’s only angry because she loves him. She craves her father’s approval more than anything.

Oliver changes his parenting tactic. He cannot shield his children from the very life they have chosen for themselves. He asks Mia to fight in the ring with him and William to help get them in. Oliver treats his children like they are part of the team – like partners.

Mia has been trying to show her father what she’s capable of since the moment she came to the present. Underneath all that anger and blame, is a little girl who just wants to make her daddy proud. What Mia needs to realize is she already makes Oliver proud merely by existing. However, he offers her the support and belief she’s been craving as they enter the ring together. 

Source: oliverxfelicity

The look on her face says everything about how Mia truly feels about her dad.

Source: arrowdaily

FATHER DAUGHTER FIGHT CLUB. From the moment, we met Blackstar in the ring I hoped she was Olicity’s daughter and we would somehow, someway get a scene of Oliver and Mia teaming up. But I never imagined these circumstances. It’s awesome.

After kicking butt as a team and a family, Oliver opens the door to his past and lets his children walk through. And what better place to start than the beginning?

Source: olivergifs

The truth is a tie that binds and it will be the foundation of Oliver’s relationship with his children. Something he never had with his parents until it was too late.

And did William and Mia stop loving Oliver after they heard the truth? No. They understand him better and love him all the more for what he’s survived. 

Mia: Don’t forget to send me that picture of my dad with that haircut.

Anatoly: Don’t forget to ask about Bratva tattoo. We have matching.

Oliver: Used to. Used to actually.

William: Oh I’m gonna need to hear that story immediately.

Well... son this raving loony burned my tattoo off my chest after several hours of torture. 

The warm banter of this scene isn’t to make light of what Oliver Queen suffered. It’s to show the power of telling our stories. Pain and fear lose control over us, bit by bit, the more we talk about it and share with our loved ones. We let them inside the good and bad, so we don’t have to carry it by ourselves anymore. Overtime, we begin to see our suffering for what it is - something we survived. Children, in particular, have an ability to find the light in the dark. We can see our life through their eyes and remarkably, yes even find the humor in what was once unspeakable pain. And come on - Oliver’s flashback hair is always funny.

Family is the source of Oliver’s strength. It always has been. It’s what helped him survive the unsurvivable.

He can only become his children’s strength by teaching them how he became a better man. William and Mia can only understand who their father is, and how to be heroes, by knowing the good and the bad. Hiding either tarnishes the beauty of his story. Oliver is finally strong enough to tell it and his children are strong enough to hear it. And that’s how the past, present and future will find harmony, acceptance, forgiveness and love.

Source: oliverxfelicity

Diggle and Roy

John enlists Roy’s help obtaining the plutonium.

 Source: thistributeisonfire

We’re going to run through this pretty quick because this storyline is all about getting Colton Haynes back on Team Arrow for the final episodes. 

Diggle tells Roy what happens to him in the future. The cure for Roy’s bloodlust wasn’t hiding out on Lian Yu for 20 years. It was rejoining the team and fighting for the city again.

Diggle: Maybe this time you don’t have to wait that long.

Diggle’s ENTIRE motivation is to change Roy’s future and it’s not difficult to figure out why. Obviously John cares about Roy and wants to help him. However, Roy also makes a very good test case. Diggle is also desperate to change Connor, JJ and Zoe’s future as well. If they can make their own hope in the present then maybe things can be different for his children in the future.

Source: 1-crazy-dreamer

We all need love and support. None of us can truly survive on our own - particularly when we are suffering. Roy fights John at first, but eventually he comes to realize he’s right. Roy found purpose and family when he met Oliver so it makes sense to him they are the reason he gets better. So why wait? He comes home and begins the path to healing twenty years earlier. And thus, a major storyline from Season 7 flash forwards begins to change.

ROY MADE SENSE Y’ALL!!! 

L*urel L*nce

I truly could not figure out why L*urel was in Russia. I guess to help Oliver track down these plans, but she spent the better part of the episode staring at her fingernails. That’s not even an exaggeration. KC stared at her fingernails for an entire scene.

Source: thistributeisonfire 

Her interactions with Oliver are even more bizarre.

Source: 1-crazy-dreamer 

I’m sorry, but does L*urel go here? Bl*ck S*ren has been on the show since Season 5. You’d think at this point she’d know Oliver Queen can easily handle one guy twice his size. I’m chalking up this stupidity to the acting version of a layup, so Stephen Amell can spike it with the epic comeback of, “I’ll give him half a chance.”

I guess L*urel is primarily in Russia to betray Oliver Queen and steal the plans or something, per Lyla’s instructions.

LL: And here I thought I was supposed to be the bad guy.

At last count Lyla never murdered innocent people, so I think she's still ahead by the numbers Bl*ck S*ren.  This is the problem with L*urel’s character this year. The comparisons her character makes this season are INSANE. Putting on a new suit and calling yourself Bl*ck C*nary doesn’t automatically make you morally superior to everyone.

At least when Season 7 L*urel was playing attorney she had a healthy perspective on herself.  I was a big fan of the snark last season and found her character to be refreshingly amusing in her biting honesty, but this year the writers lost the snarky humor and have gone straight to obnoxious hypocrisy and judgment.  Sometimes she’s just downright mean in a way none of the other characters deserve. Yes, Lyla is being shady, but this in no way erases the horrors of your past L*urel. 

L*urel: If saving it means going back to the person I used to be then what the hell is the point?

We all know this whole betray Oliver thing the Monitor is playing at with L*urel is a trick. She’s not going to betray Oliver and prove herself a worthy and useful hero.  Ok. Whatever. I know I’m supposed to get excited about her big speech, but this line kind of gnawed at me. 

L*urel is unwilling to save an ENTIRE EARTH because she’d have to do something shady. She’s not willing to do any dirty work if it sullies her good name. So, Earth 2 only matters as long as L*urel gets to be a hero on it? I guess I should be happy L*urel is holding onto her moral center, but if there’s anything Oliver Queen’s story has taught us sometimes heroism requires doing unpleasant things for the greater good.

Take Lyla for example – a person L*urel feels quite comfortable judging. Lyla has been lying to her husband, something she does not want to do, for the greater good. I think we know enough about Lyla’s character by now that even though her actions are hurtful we can trust her reasons. 

LL’s primary function this week it seems is to rat Lyla out to Diggle and Oliver.

Source: stevesrogered

I guess we’re supposed to rejoice there’s no price L*urel is willing to pay for her morality, but this is still the same person who has yet to take any responsibility for the people she’s murdered. The line just sounded so arrogant and self serving to me. I don’t know. Maybe it was just KC’s delivery.

It’s been difficult for me to imagine what role either L*urel or Dinah will play in the spin off and seeing as how the writers are struggling to find a purpose for their characters in the final season of Arrow I am not encouraged. That said, L*urel’s scene with Mia was one of the few bright spots for her character in this week’s episode.  Mia believes she’s not cut out to be a hero because she failed to ring the bell like her father and Zoe’s death still weighs heavily on her conscious.

Mia: Every time I try and live up to my dad or to prove I can do what it is you all do. I fail.

L*urel: If you’re trying to live up to us, don’t. We are just as flawed as anyone. Especially me. All you can do is live up to yourself.

Damn L*urel. That was really good advice and a truthful reflection of the person you are. CAN WE HAVE THIS ATTITUDE CONSISTENTLY WEEK TO WEEK PLEASE WRITERS? This is the first time I can see a version of L*urel working in the spin off, but that’s always the problem with the writing of her character. We never know which version we’re going to get.

Season 8 is slipping back into very bad Season 1 habits. There’s a lack of cohesiveness with L*urel and they really need to get this sorted out before the new show hits the air. Otherwise, we’re going to have the same problem we’ve always had with her character. No matter how many versions of L*urel’s character these writers create they never figure out who she truly is because they don’t want to devote the necessary screen time. This leaves us with a half baked canary every single time.

If L*urel is going to play Rupert Giles to Mia’s Buffy in the spin off then this scene is a good indication of how it could work, but that’s only if this path stays on track which seldom happens with this character. The key to LL is a very specific supporting role. She worked great in Season 7 because her focus was getting Oliver Queen out of jail. Then,it was about fleshing out her redemption and shipping her back to E2 to make amends.

L*urel lacks a concrete To Do list this year. They toss her into scenes and she takes up space looking at her fingernails. Or she arrives a few minutes after Oliver frees himself to scream down a door he could have easily opened. Or she says something hypocritical and nasty. REALLY? This is the best these writers can come up with? Sadly, history points to yes.

Keep her scenes short. Keep her scenes specific. Keep her scenes supporting. That’s the only way this character works. And believe me I wish it was different, but there doesn’t seem to be any version of L*urel L*nce these writers can keep a handle on.

You know what I appreciate about this scene between Anatoly and William though? Anatoly addresses his less than honorable past and apologizes. I can’t fully remember what Anatoly did to William - I think it might have been related to kidnapping or a bomb or a nuke or all three. See? I told you I don’t remember S6. My point is - can we expect an apology from L*urel for being an accessory to William’s mother’s murder? I won’t hold my breath. It would be extremely helpful if they addressed LL’s past in an honest way and actually had her show remorse to one of her victims, but again that requires more screen time and effort than this show is ever will to give her character.

SO WHY DO THEY KEEP HER AROUND?

Stray Thoughts

Connor isn’t in this week’s episode because he’s checking in on Sandra. Soooo… Connor can visit his mother but Mia and William can’t visit theirs? I know this is yet another EBR plot hole, but find a better reason for Connor to be MIA writers. It just makes the Smoak-Queen family look uncaring, which we know they are not. And if Connor can get an off camera mother moment mention then why can’t Mia and William? THESE ARE THE THINGS THAT ANNOY ME.

“Has anyone fought six men before?” Mia and Oliver’s side eye is hilarious, but didn’t Mia fight six goons by herself? And we’ve watched Oliver take down twenty without breaking a sweat. Raise the number in the ring a little if you want me to take their hesitation seriously.

Diggle is absolutely horrified to find out Lyla is working against the team with The Monitor. “I didn’t want to believe it was true.” Boy, really? Who are you kidding? This is Lyla Michaels, super spy. She’s been lying and doing shady things from minute one. She’s the Oliver to your Felicity. Get out of here with that nonsense. This is totally something she would do and you know it. Lol

William doesn’t like the field, but the allure of beautiful couture convinces him otherwise. At least he didn’t have to go on a skeevy date with Ray Palmer to wear it. Source:  felicitysmoakgifs

William’s “Wrap it up” sign while Mia was fighting was such a funny and wonderful way of showing their team within a team.

“I can be the fun uncle.” Raise your hand if you want Anatoly as a fun uncle. 

He was a complicated, but ultimately wonderful character who made Arrow a better show. 

Goodbye Anatoly. I will miss you. source:  oliverxfelicity

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[splazbee]

A guide to Reverse Asra (and how to avoid it)

I’ve seen some people already covering the reversed routes for the characters, but I found the need to try and understand first hand.

So, after a lot of pain, I found my way to the Reversed Asra route. There are several keys to getting it, which is the same for all the characters: feed into their bad habits and negative traits. Don’t push them to change. For Asra, those negative traits are as such: his tendency to run away, to push away the problems, isolating himself and an obsessive need to keep MC safe.

The first three are all aspects of one problem. When talking with Asra about our past, he told MC about the argument they had. Asra wanted to escape the town, leave the people to fend for themselves and him to find a safe place. He wanted to go with MC, but MC wanted to help the city. 

Here are some roots of the problem, and Asra can react in different ways. In the Upright route, Asra learns how to stand his ground in face of adversity, how to let people in and let them help. He can make MC grow. The other, Reverse reaction, is to regret even more not keeping MC safe and going to extreme heights to do so. He already gave up a part of his heart for MC to return to life, what more wouldn’t he do?

Encouraging his desire to run away, making MC look and act helpless, therefore making Asra believe MC would never survive without him, is the recipe for the disaster that is the Reverse route.

And here is why.

I went aaaall the way back to when MC and Asra went to his Sanctuary out of Vesuvia. MC is asked by Asra if they would prefer a big, bustling city, or a remote place. Answering remote appeals to his want to run away, especially with the apprentice.  Clap and a half for escapism everyone. 

The next choice is possibly not the most important in this whole scheme, but even choosing how to ride Beast can have its weight. Sitting in front is more adventurous, while sitting behind Asra? It already shows MC relies on him, in a way literally hiding behind his back.

I forgot to take my note in this choice, so i forgot where it was exactly in the midst of important choices, but it’s about MC’s dream. Telling Asra the dream about MC and him going off in a separate dimension or universe all of their own was a good one, welp, (a little maybe spoiler) lets not plant ideas in either Asra’s or MC’s head, m’kay?

Helping the villagers. While you do help them anyway, the way you go about it matters. Picking “We’re busy”, even though that is not exactly true, makes MC seem very callous, and selfish. Asra is shocked for a moment before he laughs. While picking this choice made me feel guilty, it does its job of isolating MC, and therefore Asra, from the outside world.

Next, relying on Asra to deal with the well. Again, enforcing the notion that MC needs to rely on Asra to do all the heavy lifting, and Asra, being the precious bean he is, shows once again that he would do anything for MC. This is not shaping up to be a healthy relationship people, especially for Asra.

Not taking the initiative and asking Asra to dance, and instead sitting in a faraway corner with him - isolation again.

Next the choice of going back directly to the palace, or first visiting the shop - this is avoiding the problems, leaving them for later. Running away from them. Not literally, not yet, but going there.

Meeting Muriel is the next on the chopping block. The most important bit is MC’s reaction to meeting him - whether MC is happy to meet him, or feeling nervous. Choosing nervous shows an unwillingness to meet new people, slight suspicion of them, and most importantly - a dependency on Asra.

Following this is MC’s opinion on Asra and Muriel. The choices being “Good thing you got away” and “Good thing you had each other”, based on previous statements, it’s written right there on the box which answer makes it more likely to get the Reverse route.

When Asra is confronted about his vanishing habit by Julian, MC saying “You’re always there for me” sounds suspiciously supportive, but it isn’t really, not in the long run. Telling Asra he has a vanishing-into-lands-unknown problem right in his face provokes change. In a positive direction, god forbid. I’m saying this sarcastically, but while he cares about Muriel, Nadia and Julian, if MC tells him to do something, he will follow it to the dot. Telling him he is always there for us just keeps him blind to his faults.

And so, we reach THE TRIAL. Picking the choice of Asra telling the people he’s innocent? Nicely packaged, but ultimately a bad decision. Asra keeps his secrets close to his chest, and while we all love this floofy boy, it is a fact he has quite the dark side. So he also lies. Condoning that is not okay. Him telling the truth challenges him. It’s against him. But he trusts MC, so when MC wants him to tell the truth, he changes. He grows.

Next up, MC asking Nadia to stop the fight is a bad choice, though I don’t believe it to be such a major one. But it shows one thing: no matter how much MC relies on Asra, they don’t truly believe in him or his abilities. This exact thing will play its role again in a later choice.

The next few choices are a bit foggy for me. I’m pretty sure in the next choice, picking “Let me help” is an Upright choice. Because wow, MC doesn’t want to rely on Asra and actually tries to be equal with him, like a healthy relationship should be? Whaaat?

When asked by Asra what MC would do in his place, I am confused as to which one is the Reverse choice. To me personally, “I’d do anything” seems to validate everything Asra has done for us, making it a situation of ends-justify-the-means. While I’m very happy that he did resurrect MC, because we wouldn’t have a story without that, it may push him into thinking that its always all in when it comes to MC. Pushing his protectiveness into an obsession.

“Why am I here?” and the “...” option seem to be the next Reverse choices. The first one shows that MC is still relying on heir teacher to explain things to them, a bit of naivete that kindles at Asra’s protectiveness. It’s a similar situation with “...” MC has no idea how to react, and need Asra to support them.

I’ll be shorter for the next choices, as this is getting quite long. “Did it change you?” seems to be the next Reverse choice, because “I’d do the same for you” is supportive, but i could be wrong here, as I was very conflicted. Trying to cancel the Masquerade is again avoidance of problems and running away. When it’s about Faust the “You’d do the same for me” seems to be the reverse choice. To me it feels like MC implies they don’t really care about Faust, and who would be so mad as to not like her, amirite?

Next up, dealing with the Devil. I picked No for his first offer, and then yes after he made Faust vanish. He confusion and fear broke me. Next I chose to tell the Devil that indeed, the Masquerade was enjoyable, but now we are so far into this Reverse hell, I don’t even know if it matters anymore. The next choice is very transparent - MC telling Asra they can’t do this alone after MC is left stranding in the Half world (what was the term for it again?)

Trusting Scout and telling the Magician MC doesn’t feel safe with him also aren’t very obvious to me.

Next up - Asra’s confession!!!  I trembled as, when in the face of his declaration, I made MC stutter out an “I... um...” Get yourself together MC, this boy needs love.

Magic realm time! Choosing the “I just want this to be over” shows the now infamous in this essay need to escape and get away, preferably to some isolated place. When confronted with the magic chains, “Find a safer path” shows MC unwillingness to stand up to adversity, and, well, a lack of courage. How will MC deal with the Devil is now beyond me (pun not intended, but the foreshadowing is too good for me to redact this).

Interactions with Asra’s parents. As with Muriel, an unwillingness to meet and trust new people, no matter how close they may be to Asra, must be shown. To me shaking hands seems more impersonal, and later not commending the spell Asra’s dad crafted. When in a timed choice attacking the tree is too straightforward, so the Reverse answer should be when MC goes into ‘helpless’ mode and just going “what do we do?!” Then right after, unwillingness to trust Asra’s dad to heal us, making Asra do it, and the poor boy is so jittery and nervous and afraid and stressed he can’t cast the magic fully and/or correctly.

Here comes LUCI! Asra presents MC with the idea of trapping Lucio. And here comes that point from waaaaaay back up at the gladiator battle, where MC doubted his abilities and his decisions. Picking “I’m not so sure...” and then completely disregarding Asra’s advice about approaching the water, shows a complete lack of faith in Asra, unwillingness to listen to him and sealing the deal of his protectiveness of MC turning into an obsession.

SPOILERS FOR CHAPTER 20

Finally, we have come to the Reversed route. Asra goes completely into a tunnel vision mode. Where in the Upright path, he suggests we use MCs blood to give the immunity of our magic to all the guests of the arcane feast, in the Reversed path he completely focuses on running away. Asking where we should run, the oasis or the shop, trying to find the right way in the maze. 

At a moment he says “... we can escape. Make sure the ritual fails. That’s... that’s all we can do now.” and when Muriel’s charm starts to completely give out Asra says “You can escape. Run far away, live your life...” In answer to MC choosing to say “I don’t think I can”, he apologizes. 

“I... I’m so sorry, MC. I wanted to protect you, but...”

Everything we started with. His desire to escape, run to a faraway place, protecting MC. All traits present thorough the story, fed by choices of at least 11 books. This is what causes the Reversed end.

He turned into a scared, helpless wreck of a man, desperate and trapped in his needs. And even if at the table, MC finally tries to take a stand and use Magic, its finally revealed why we can do what we can do, but seriously, we all knew we were the Fool already. Even then, MC has go make a deal with the Devil.

This is the end of this long, long essay. I’ll probably make a summarized version of this. More people will be inclined to reach the end at least :D

[kakuriyo-translations]

Chapter 2: The Master Ogre God

Chapter 2: The Master Ogre God 25. "Aoi, do not let the Ayakashi scare you. You are special, so it is easy for them to kidnap you." "Is Aoi easy to kidnap?" "That's right, humans that can see Ayakashi are easily targeted. They're easy to eat and easy to use. Easy to like and easy to hate. It is easy to be loved and also easy to be hated. In short, you are a subject of ridiculous interest for them." My grandfather had a serious face back then as he took my hand, advising me through life. But my young self could not understand those words at all. "Aoi doesn't want to be eaten! Aoi doesn't want to leave grandpa." "Is that right? Well, grandpa doesn't want Aoi to leave or be taken either.... Aoi, be especially careful of ogres." "Ogres? Aoi has not seen an ogre." "They are tricky to find because they almost look the same as humans, perhaps that may be hard for you to understand."

26."Are they human?" "No, they are not people. They are incompatible with humans." My grandfather shook his head strongly in denial of my question. "They lead a cold and villainous path, doing anything they want in order to get what they want, they do not feel for others. That's why Aoi, do not let your guard down around ogres." My grandfather always told me to be careful around ogres. Ogres.

There was a feeling that I had fallen somewhere. "Ouch!" Hitting my head on something hard, I let out a dull shout. I had collapsed. When I open my eyes, I see a ceiling that I don't recognise. It was almost as if the ceiling was glittering, paintings of Ayakashi dancing was painted onto it, it intrigued me. I was in some strange hall. Why? It's so cold. I notice that my body is badly drenched in water.

27."Aoi." A low calm, disgusting voice called my name. I looked into his face for a moment, the one with the Ogre mask. I had met him at the shrine, I'd given him my lunchbox. What a shame that was. "Ah, you're from this morning!" Raising my voice with surprise, I stand holding my lower back. I check around me, only giving a glance. The room is mostly tatami mat and dimly lit, cold air drifts in occasionally. Straight away I understood that this was an expensive and gorgeous building. What's going on? It seems everyone who is peacefully sitting around the room quietly like figurines are Ayakashi. Everyone is wearing a kimono and different masks. I cannot see their expressions, they're only sitting and watching me peacefully. I can sense a murderous intent or hostility from the chills creeping up my skin. They seem unhappy and look at me almost as if aiming for their prey. I could sense a vicious disgust radiating from their bodies. I am surrounded by Ayakashis. I could feel the blood draining from my face. Even if you are used to seeing  Ayakashi, this is my first time being surrounded by them.

28. In this place that I do not know, no one is on my side. As if I've been hit by a wave, a cold fear overcomes my body. Firmly trying to get a hold of myself, I turn my head towards the Ayakashi to the side of the Ogre in front of me. I think I may be able to say something, although, I only thought there was one Ayakashi at first. "Eh?" However, one of them cried out unexpectedly, slowly I turned to look over. My eyes widen. A pale face with human features and cool eyes. A breathtaking cold and beautiful appearance. A man with black hair. I narrow my eyes at his smiling face. If you look close enough there are sharply pointed horns sticking out from his head, his eyes are also red. He isn't human. This guy, this guy is an ogre. "How are you feeling my bride?" Eh.. ha??" Those were the surprising words of the ogre, I look around restlessly. Surely he's not talking about me?

29. "How are you feeling? I'm asking you, my bride. Are you listening to me? Aoi, I mean you. You are my bride." "To be honest, I don't understand the meaning of all this, it makes me feel unwell," I answered with a serious expression. The ogre in front of me remains calm, smiling. Bride? This ogre, what is he saying? Although he is beautiful, my grandfather warned me to be alarmed by them. This all seems too doubtful. My body is cold from being drenched. My dress has become transparent and tough from the water. My stockings are torn and hair is sticking to my face. Surely my makeup is in disarray. This appearance must be so embarrassing but at the moment I can not afford to care. Because of this unknown situation, my shame is equal to none. Perhaps even if my life is saved, I may not be able to go home safely. "Master, as you can see it would be better if you did not marry this human girl." Said a masked Ayakashi to the black haired ogre, they dismissed me with such hate in their voice. Red-bean coloured hair can be seen poking out from the edge of the mask, although, it isn't really human. "I can not allow my Master to marry such a filthy little girl."

30. At those words, all the other Ayakashi who seemed just like figurines started talking with hatred towards me at the same time. They hide their mouths with fans or sleeves. "Absolutely right!" "Such a filthy daughter of humans!" "She's plain!" "Incompetent!" "Seedy-looking!" Obviously, they like saying anything that comes to mind. However, it all seems to be something bad... But I do not care about such a silly thing. The desire to escape from here somehow starts to burn inside me. This place is a nest for Ayakashi. Right now, usual encounters with Ayakashi cannot compare to this. The ones here are not low class. I can only comprehend what's happening by watching it unfold. An exit can be seen on the side in a gap between the Shoji sliding door, what good timing. "Now!" Well, that was daring. "Ah, that girl!" Such a sound made the Ayakashi stand up all at once. Meanwhile, I do not hesitate and run out between the side from the gap of the Shoji sliding door. The edge is wet with no gripping, if possible I'd like to get somewhere else. That was my plan.

31. But that plan was soon undone. As a strange colourful landscape spread out from what I assumed to be the edge of the building. I was terribly surprised. I opened my eyes wide, stopping my feet from running. "Ehhh?" Right in front of me is a world I've never seen before. It seems that the wet edge I stand on is far above even the sky. Apparently, I'm at the top of an extremely tall building, the ground is a long way down. I can see buildings wrapped in lights of lanterns, I know this is obviously not a normal place in Japan. The boulevard below seems very busy, everyone here is an Ayakashi, I can understand that fact from here. Ogres, monsters, demons, persistently written flags, red lanterns hang around here and there. Buildings, not like a normal house or an apartment. It looked like it could be an old townscape reminiscent to traditional Japan. Whilst it seems to be an old-fashioned traditional town like Kyoto. However, the red-coloured risen building on the right reminds me of Ancient China. A little further away is a big temple surrounded by tall 5-storied pagoda buildings, from here you can see a couple of them. However, nothing in the real world could ever look like this. Somewhat unstable and heteromorphic, I could never remember seeing anything like this before.

32. Just like a labyrinth, complicated. Surely, this is an air I have never felt before. I understood that this place was much more busy than the Apparent Realm. "....." I couldn't blink as I looked out at the landscape before me. A Japanese ship was floating in the sky, passing over the clouds, although it was shocking I wasn't surprised too much. I do not know. I do not know such a world! A thing that crossed my mind at that moment was this 'Different World,' had entirely different characters. A cold wind briskly blew up from the bottom of the building causing my hair to get into a frenzy. Because of that, my legs froze on the spot. "Where am I?" "This is the Hidden Realm, Aoi." The ogre answered my question, whispering from behind. I pulled back my arm. "The Hidden realm?" That name seems familiar, surely I've heard it somewhere before. "It's dangerous here, so go inside." "This isn't the Apparent Realm."

33. Without taking my eyes off the strange world in front of me I asked him with a firm expression. I don't understand this. Why?  Why was I brought to such a place? Contrary to my confusion, the black-haired ogre with a calm tone. "This is the world where Ayakashi lives. This is different from the world humans live in. However, the Apparent Realm and this world are coherent with each other and connected in many various places. These two places are similar yet totally different at the same time. This is a successful inn for Ayakashi, Tenjinya." "Tenjinya?" Finally, I was able to pin it to something. I knew that name, when I was cleaning grandfather's belongings, it was that black and white picture. My grandfather was in front of this inn, he was taking pictures with Ayakashi. I looked back slowly, looking at the black-haired man behind me. Although now there is a horn on his head, I could feel he was not a person from the coldness of those red eyes, looking at me chillingly. I could feel my body starting to get cold. "Who are you?" "I am the owner of this inn, they call me Ogre-god or Master." "An ogre?" "I am the ogre that will become your husband."

34. I distorted my expression whilst the ogre in front of me looked on pleasantly. I wanted to deny it, giving my head a small shake. "What? Why would an ogre want to become the husband of a human? You can't." "Although I am an ogre it doesn't matter, Shiro made such a promise to me, so you have no choice." As soon as he mentioned my grandfather's name I became stiff. "Let me explain Aoi, your grandfather Shiro-" "Surely it's a mistake!" I answered the Ayakashi as he stood in his place. The ogre laughed faintly narrowing his red eyes. "I doubt it. You see, I had a long relationship with Shiro, of whom had connections in many various places." "Connections?"

35. "Yes, you see Shiro could move back and forth between the Apparent Realm and this realm as he pleased, they said he was one of a kind. Shiro had very strong spiritual energy, enjoying all the fun things this world had to offer him, he was a free man. Then once upon a time, he decided to flutter around here at Tenjinya for three days and three nights, drinking and eating, enjoying every luxury at hand.  Although, because of that towards the end of it he had brought himself into an amount of large debt that was impossible for him to pay. But I gave him a chance and refused to eat him." "....." It wasn't an unlikely story, so it immediately satisfied my curiosity. Although, it only makes me pale more. Grandpa, what a  foolish thing to do to an Ayakashi. "But, I'm also running a business here. I asked Shiro if he'd pay, work here for life, or be eaten. Shiro, however, shook his head and told me something else. What do you think he said?" Pulling on my arm, the ogre came close to my face. I shook my head. "Because I love freedom, I cannot possibly stay in one place. It can't be helped that you want to eat me. So I will give you some money. However, that's it, if I can not repay all of my debt within my life I offer you my granddaughter to be your Ogre Bride. That's what he said. I couldn't believe it. Shiro was a ridiculous man. He truly was scum." "......" "Ah so in short Aoi, you are collateral for his debt." This ogre came to a conclusion on the matter in such a merciless way. It made me feel dizzy. However, I try to remain somehow mindful for a while, keeping myself in check.

36. "Is that what you meant after all? Is it not a mistake? Being my grandpa's granddaughter, I've already been surprised plenty." "Ah, of course. Because you are Shiro's granddaughter who can see the Ayakashi. You are the only one for me. Those who cannot see Ayakashi cannot even visit the Hidden Realm in the first place." The ogre explains this to me as if it is all an ordinary situation. However, his words did happen to seem strangely convincing. "Do you need me to say it again, Aoi? You and I have a promise to become married, we should get on to that. You must marry me." ".......Me marrying?...." From the side I saw the ogre pull out an object, it was a nice small box. Picking it up he opened it, grabbing a piece of paper from the inside. He shows it to me. "This is a pledge. As long as this is present, those promises must be fulfilled." On a fine piece of paper, it was written as such. 'I, Shiro Tsubaki am in debt to the Master of Tenjinya. Because I cannot repay it, in the meantime I will give you my granddaughter who has the most spiritual power. I swear it, Shiro Tsubaki-' Indeed from the last honest and miserable sentence, this letter definitely was written by my grandfather. I understand well that his signature is written firmly at the end and that this is a pledge. Somehow, as long as this was around I knew I could not run away.

37. What is marriage? Was my first thought. Heterosexuality is often present with couples, they then begin to talk and suddenly become family members. In short, it is to be a husband and wife. Impossible, I hardly know this guy. No, I only met him for the first time just before, this guy is not even a person, but an Ayakashi. Moreover, he is an ogre that told me to be most wary of my grandpa. My head hurts. I can't stop trembling. No, I can't stop trembling, it may be because my body is cold and wet but I'm not sure. The anger for my grandfather may have started to occupy my thoughts. Grandpa, grandpa... why? What a stupid thing of you to do. My favourite grandfather, he really did just let his granddaughter take on all his debt so easily, I felt uninhibited amnesia followed by despair. These swirling unbalanced thoughts and feelings travel through my head. The ogre looks at my trembling expression full of agony, trying to hold back laughter as he puts a sleeve over his mouth. He truly is an ogre. Devil. Demonic animal. Surely my miserable appearance is pleasant for him. The ogre grabbed onto my arm, pulling me up. He then takes me back to the room filled with many Ayakashi. His nail digs into my arms, causing a hot pain to rush through it. Why was all of this so wrong?

38. "Now, let's get ready for our marriage. Perhaps such a dress that you're wearing is not suitable for the occasion. Take a hot bath and change clothes." "No, I don't care." I refused. The surrounding Ayakashi start to make noise. But, I have to refuse, no matter what. "I definitely do not like or want to be an Ogre's Bride." ".....Definitely?" "Absolutely! I hate it." "......" Even in this situation, I will absolutely refuse as clearly as I can. This ogre's heart is closed with no desire nor despair. So I will continue to refuse him without mercy. "Even if you say I'm collateral for debt, I can not accept such a thing! So, return me to the Apparent Realm!" "That's no good." The ogre raised his face, whilst lowering his voice and said that. "This place is secluded, to open the entrance to this realm, a corresponding toll is required. You already have your grandfathers debt, so I doubt you can pay a toll."

39."Do not make a fool of me. You brought me here! So, take responsibility and pay the toll to return me to the other world! Or I'll sue for kidnapping." He swings his arm, trying to grip mine. I thrust my fingers back violently. Those were my words to him. However, the Ayakashi behind me spoke up, "How uneducated," they are almost trembling in anger. "You fool, you who is a meagre dirty human daughter is not even a substitute for debt! You should be thankful for the Masters kindness! Although it can not be forgiven, all you are is Shiro's granddaughter!!" Said the man with red-bean coloured hair wearing a mask. "I will eat up to the muscle of your bones!" He stood up, taking a breath, it seems he does not like my former family member. "Manager!" "Please do not act so savagely." It was as if he was a spider jumping about. A white thread like substance had filled up my surroundings. My feet became tangled in the whiplashing strings. "Kyaa!" Putting out a cute scream I fall down. My hip and back slowly hit the floor. No, this can't be happening. This damn Ayakashi is a spider. When things are caught in spider webs, they are normally eaten to the bone because they cannot escape.

40. But suddenly the face of the Ayakashi came close to the ogre. "Wait, Tsuchigomo." It was stopped. "Do not make a wrong move. You still have time to spare, so you'd better act like a gentleman." "Master you're being too kind! Such a little girl, I can see the pain in your eyes so I'll listen to what you say." He stops after hearing the ogres words, why? "Good." He nodded. What's good? Ogres are ogres, and yet he has a stubborn smile which is incomprehensible. "Are the Three Faceless Sisters here?" When the ogre snaps his fingers, the sliding doors open. Three people stood in the doorway, all being beautifully large, medium and small. However, they were faceless. The ogre gives instructions to them. "I think we should let my bride know where her position is here. Prepare the Torture in Hell treatment." "Eh?" "Now, go along. Do not stop even if she hates it. She needs to know where she stands." It takes a short amount of time for these faceless women to carry me off to another room without resistance. Ehhhhhhh? No way, I never thought it would be like this. Something could be broken. This is a physical punishment. I could be hurt.

41. They must be lying, even in this situation it would be better if it were to hurt only for a moment, this doesn't seem fun. "This is the boiling water torture." The smallest one said. She made a prefix written as,'pine.' Then spoke with the tiniest little voice even though she has no mouth. As she says this, I was stripped of my clothes, then immersed in lush warm water which glowed a warm red and glittered. Honestly, it's very relaxing and comfortable. The warmth of the water spreads through out my body. "This is the skinning torture." The medium faceless lady made a 'bamboo,' prefix. She scrubs and washes my body. I don't have to do anything. At the end, they paint a mysterious sweet smelling liquid on my body. My skin became so shiny it was almost blinding. "This is the binding torture."  The biggest faceless lady made a 'plum,' prefix. I was dressed in an indignant blue yukata tightened by a yellow belt. Although it is cute with a lint pattern, when the belt is tightened- "Wow!" It is a bit uncomfortable.

42. "The torture is nearly done." The three faceless sisters each prepare my personal belongings. 'Pine,' dried my hair. My cat like hair finally became smooth. She also massaged my stiff shoulders.'Bamboo,' applied a thin layer of makeup, it was a light crimson red powder.'Plum,' paints my nails. She also applied cream to my hands that were rough and coarse. "The Torture in Hell treatment is complete." "No, it wasn't tortured though was it, it was a luxurious hot spring treatment at this inn." "Is it a torture?" "Right?" "Right?" Even though I tried, the Three Faceless Sisters did not say a word on it. They have no facial expressions and I can not read what's on their minds. "The Master is waiting for you." Then, they held me again taking me somewhere else. "Master, please reconsider not marrying a human daughter! If a human becomes an important lady in charge I am not convinced she could do her job as an employee, this could cause a conflict in Tenjin-ya! For the houses in the north! This fight which would take place in the corner of the Hidden Realm could soon turn into a conflict  between the rest of us, it will be a fight for the future!"

43."Even if I do marry, I will not put her in charge so soon." "That's even more useless!" The three faceless sisters brought me to the other side of the sliding door, that was when I could hear such a conversation. The complaining voice is that of the spider that tried to make an enemy of me earlier. "This isn't useful, it's bad!" I opened the sliding door slickly. Towards the back of the sliding door are three Ayakashi. One is the Ogre-god, the other is probably the spider because of the mask. The other one has the mask of a white fox, this Ayakashi must have been hiding in the shadows earlier. Because I had suddenly been thrust into a room with these three Ayakashi the situation hardened a little bit. "Hmm, how was the torture? I take it you had more than just the hot spring. Has your body warmed up now?" My body is much warmer now and has settled, so has my liver apparently. I tighten my facial expression, while this is a stupid idea, I head over to the Ogre. "Aw, Aoi my bride, my yukata looks nice on you." "Thanks to you. This seems like a nice inn, the service here is wonderful."

44. "Do you understand your position now?" "Are you going to become a bride even though you're at such a low class?" "If you become my bride the services at this inn would be unlimited to you." "I will not take your hand. Please return me home quickly." "Keep it silent or else you'll be missing out!" The Tsuchigomo said concisely coming closer. I thought that I didn't have to keep silent after glaring at the ridiculous spider I continued. "It's natural, I'm only 20 years old, I'm still a college student. As a college student, I've never even thought of marrying someone. I'm really really sorry, Ayakashi." "Calm down, calm down. It's no use saying that since I'm not going to give up." "Wh-" Just like a child would do, the ogre admonished me with haste. Until a while ago I was burning up, but now, my body is going totally cold. Awful Ayakashi. They have an optimum existence filled with coldness. "Why don't we use the inner parlour?" The ogre could not see my agonizing expression, there were plum blossoms embedded in the wall behind the hallway, he opens the door to the inner parlour. "Do you have anything to offer?"

45. I asked the ogre. A man with a white fox mask shakes his tails once. Perhaps he is a fox ayakashi, I can see it."Well, prepare the bedding the Camelia room, my bride is tired." "As you wish." The ayakashi with the fox mask left the room. I heard the tsuchigomo say something, he gave off a steep look. I peek into the inner parlour. It is a small inner room, a tea set is placed in the middle of the hearth. The ogre sat on the side, beckoning to me who was standing near the sliding door. "Come here, sit down where you like, my bride." Whilst wary, I finally enter the room and sit down. At that time the Tsuchigomo dully closed the sliding door for the inner parlour. "Aaaaaa." I heard someone raise their voice. "Would you like some tea? My bride." The ogre mixed the contents of the tea kettle with a ladle, pouring it into a cup he hands it over to me. I drank it. It had a deep colour, being a lovely snack, and left a good aftertaste. "Now, is there anything you want to say? This place will soon be filled with lots of employees."

46. I grasped my knees and asked something straight away. "How much is my grandpa's debt?" The ogre gives me a demoralizing look before he finally answers stroking his chin in a quizzical manner. "It roughly translated into 100 million yen in Japanese currency I believe." "Ha, ha, say that one more time?" I held an intense stare. The tuition fee that my grandfather left behind and was collecting for me is not enough. That guy, he truly did make me collateral for debt, I guess I might have to marry this ogre. Grandpa, why did you even save for my tuition? To be funny? It was only contradicting! I wish I could question my grandpa about all of this, but, it's impossible now that he's gone. "Of course, none of this is your fault, but you must clean up after your Grandfather Shiro. Aside from that, being with an Ayakashi won't be too bad right? Even in the world that humans live in they must return borrowed money, correct? It isn't an uncommon story for daughters and granddaughters to be sold because of that, is it." "Why? This is so frustrating." "That would be the case." The ogre smiles, dropping his eyes towards his sleeve, mixing the hot water in the teapot. As for me, this entire situation just makes me angry and frustrated.

47. My grandfather, without permission, decided to make me a debtor and the future wife of an ogre. I loved my grandfather for a very long time, but I wonder. Aloof in this world of wonder, I can not even read the thoughts of this ogre. "Do you wish to not be my bride that much?" "If there was any human who would want to become the bride of an ogre they'd just suddenly met, I'd be concerned." "......." The master flutters his eyes towards mind and looks at my face. "Is that right." He looks somewhat lonesome, the ogre quickly returns his gaze to the hot water in the tea kettle and mixes it lightly. Strange. Besides, under any circumstances why would such a high-class ogre want to marry me? "Do you want to marry me that much?" "Of course." When I asked him this, the ogre nodded in such a beautiful and honest manner, he looked like a young man. "Why, it's strange. You already own such a fine inn. There must be plenty of people who want to be your wife! Also, a little while ago all those Ayakashi seemed angry because of this. They seem to hate humans a lot. "No, taking a human for your wife is quite honourable, for Ayakashi it raises their rank. Even in the old times, there were tales of kidnapping human girls for this reason."

48. "Really?" "Yes, and you are Shiro's granddaughter. You are one of few who knows about Ayakashi and their secluded lifestyle, that alone makes you valuable as Shiro is somewhat of a celebrity in the Hidden Realm." "Valuable?" "You'll come to understand it naturally." The ogre smiled and finally laughed. "In addition, human girls with high spiritual energy are really delicious for Ayakashi. You taste delicious, so that means you are dear to me. But because you are dear to me I cannot eat you. But since you are delicious I want to eat you even more. But, I cannot eat you. They say this conflict is similar to living in hell. So it is a superb pleasure, there are others that have said this to be true. That's why love with humans is so restricted."

49."What? That's meaningless and dangerous, it's contradictory above anything else." "No, there's nothing contradictory about it at all. In short, for a bored Ayakashi, human girls are unusual, which makes them extreme subjects of interest."  The story that ogre told me had sounded like something my grandpa had said long ago. As you can imagine, the ogre raised his voice, "Do you like sweets?" he said, picking up a box behind him and fishing around in it. It was a sugary confectionery that imitated the shape of beautiful cherry blossoms. I was hungry, so I picked it up and ate it without hesitation. The sugar confectionery is not too sweet and has a cherry like a flavour, it tastes good, along with this it has a liquid-like centre. I ate it silently. I wonder what I should do now? At this moment, the strong feelings of disappointment in my grandfather emerge. I know the cause of this frustration and anger now. To know that my favourite grandfather would do something so disappointing and regrettable. What should I do? After a few moments of silence, I raise my face and look at the ogre's. I am afraid of those red eyes. "Hey, what if I just return my grandpa's debt, or is it useless?"

50. "What do you mean?" "I'll return the debt instead of marrying." The air in this place changes, it was the words that came out of my mouth that caused it to happen. It happened as soon as I proposed that question. The ogre adopted a serious expression in contrast to his normally cool one. "How will you return such a large amount of money?" "I'll work and earn the money, of course, besides, I'm sure this isn't the most ideal situation. If I am married to you the employees will not be happy right? You just need to give me some time to get the money." ".........." "My presence here only brought anger to the Ayakashi, one of them even threatened to eat me which I'm sure would leave a bad aftertaste." Gulping, I take a breath. The ogre keeps a calm atmosphere, glancing around the room with his cold red eyes. There was a small silence. I know, it was a reckless and foolish thing to say but, this is the only way. "I see, I see. Are you trying to bargain with me? Little girl." He drops a cigarette into the hearth.

51. The ogre who called me such a thing for the first time stood to his knees. He had a bad expression on his face with a nuisance like attitude. To be threatened by a spirit, what am I supposed to do? "Well, you can try. It'll be difficult but you can try and become an employee here. However, if you decide to work here at Tenjin-ya I will not treat you as my bride and you will have no protection. I will treat you like any other employee. So don't complain if you get eaten, alright?" "So you've shown your true nature, ogre!" "You wanted it this way." Said the ogre with a cold stormy tone. "You can find a job on your own. However, I'm not sure if you'll find one at this inn. After all, everyone is very busy and on top of that because of what Shiro's done in the past humans are hated terribly here." "....." "Well, goodluck." The ogre bent down, then stood up adjusting his coat. "Your bed is prepared, it's in an advanced suite, however, it's only for today. From tomorrow you will have to sleep in the rooms for the lowest ranked employee. Well, that's if you can find a job, you'll be homeless if you cannot find one."

52."I know that." "Is that so? Well, if you try and run away I will eat you straight away, no questions asked. But in saying that, if you become my bride I will gladly welcome you." The ogre had an ironic smile on his face. Returning this debt, it seems more than impossible. I was convinced that very soon I'd give up and have to be this ogre's bride. There is no question that this ogre is dominating. "I'm tired." After the demon left, my intentions to leave this inner room came out. The three faceless sisters were waiting for me, they guided me to my bed. The room was named 'Okamaki.' It's a lovely room. This guest room was on the upper floor and smelled of a sweet incense. The futons were already prepared. There were two pillows, I kick one to the far corner of the room and crawl into bed. As soon as I got in, tears started to overflow, I bite on my lips. Even if I try to stay strong this is all a big confusing puzzle. I just want to try. Now I'm worried about what to do and who to believe, there is only misery and loneliness.

53. All these doubts for my grandfather who I thought were family more than anything. As my grandfather's debtor, he just willingly turned me over to be the bride for an Ayakashi. This body is the only reason why, because I can see Ayakashi. However, it must have been convenient for him. My grandfather may not have loved me, although that is a lonely thought. Still, I can not hate my grandfather. This is so lonely.

I fell into my futon for a while as tears were running down my face. I was hungry, I was so hungry that I could not sleep. It's so miserable. I stood up and looked out through a large rounded glass window. In the dark night, the red light of a tower was flashing in the distance. This feels like the views of a city at night. The ships flying overhead had increased compared to before, it looked as if the aircraft were enough to light up this world. It's bright and noisy even though it's surely past midnight... When I thought about such things, a vague sound could be heard from the entrance to the room.

54. I tighten my facial expression thinking of what it could possibly be, something then opens the sliding door. There was a boy who looked about ten years old. He raised his voice surprised, "Woah." He fell down on the spot. He had bright blue eyes, like fireworks, and even in the dark, I noticed his white fluffy ears and tail. "Oh, that was unexpected." I thought that an Ayakashi had come to eat me, my heart was beating fast. The boy was looking up at me with big eyes, a tray in his hand. There was three sushi lining the tray. My stomach growled. "I thought that you might be hungry. So I brought a midnight snack. This is a secret from the Master. Don't worry, it's not poisoned so please eat at ease." Said the boy in a small hushed voice. I feel relieved from his appearance as he smiles and shakes his tails. "Thank you very much, what's your name?" "Oh, I'm a nine tails fox, my name is Ginji! I'm the Young Master here at Tenjinya." The boy with silver hair bowed his head deeply. "Oh, so you're the Young Master? Isn't that a very great position? Perhaps, you're the son of that ogre?"

55."No, that's not the case. The Master doesn't have any sons." The child explained to me almost as if I was blind. "Here at Tenjinya, the position is not hereditary. The title is easy enough to understand, so the right person is chosen for it. It can change depending on the circumstances. Even though I look like this, I'm nearly as old as the Master." "No way." "It's true!" If I can recall I believe that fox boys are not very reminiscent of their childhoods and have calm attitudes, his tone also sounds somewhat grown up. In the room that the ogre and I were in earlier... There it was, a revelation! I remember that another Ayakashi was wearing a fox mask. "Do you mean, Ginji-san you were in the room with the ogre earlier?" "Yeah, I see you've noticed, as expected of Shiro's granddaughter." Ginji-san had a very bright expression on his face. He brings the sleeve of his kimono to his face, confirming it. "Because I can use the art of shapeshifting I can use nine forms for the situation. I mainly use the form of an adult man but we often use the appearance of a child."

56."Why a child?" "Well, this is a pretty form is it not? Besides, I was afraid I'd scare you otherwise." Ginji-san smiled. "Is your stomach feeling better?" Ginji-san is then immersed in smoke. I could see a white kimono as the smoke retracted, as it disappeared a beautiful silver-haired woman appeared. She looks extremely beautiful. I touch the fluffy ears and tail. "Waaahh, amazing!" An unexpectedly adorable voice comes out. "No, no! Don't touch too much." "I'm impressed, you really look like a genuine girl!" Ginji-san who is somewhat shy is unexpectedly funny. I look around carefully before pulling Ginji-san into my room. "I'd like to hear various stories about this place, I was wondering if now would be a good time while I'm eating." "Of course, I'm sure there are many things you're uneasy about.

57. Ginji-san looked depressed. He changed into the figure of a white fox child and entered the room. "This is cute." "So fluffy! Too fluffy!" The fox rested his head on my knee, I drop my jaw and stroke its back and the tailcoat. These transformations are extraordinary. Even if he's an Ayakashi like the ogre or the spider just by being in this lovely appearance of a fox I can tell he's showing his true face. I feel like I can trust him. I grabbed a sushi with my other hand and took a bite. The sweetness of the modest vegetables, rice and sweet potatoes are really delicious. I like sushi with these ingredients in them, I also like simple butterfly sushi paired with noodles! The hunger in my stomach makes this taste irresistible. "Hey, why was everyone covering their faces in the room with the ogre earlier? It looked really suspicious." When I asked about the thing that was concerning me the most Ginji seemed shocked. "Eh?? I don't always cover my face, not around employees. Mostly only when dealing with external customers, it's corporate style, is it not?"

58."Before that was an employees meeting and a deal with an external customer." I felt he was not lying as he said this. "But as long as you wear your mask, people cannot see your expression, so they may think of the worst. It isn't very efficient and only raises suspicion which is already common for Ayakashi." "Us Ayakashi also think about efficiency you know!" I take another bite of the sushi whilst patting the small fox. "Hey, what type of person is that Ogre Master anyway?" Just what kind of person is that Ogre? Even now, I cannot forget those cold eyes from before. "The Master is a wonderful Ogre, cold, brutal and bold." "That's a bit contradictory don't you think?" Will these cold and brutal ties lead to something deeper? I thought whilst letting my eyes look into the distance. "No, no! The Master is truly a wonderful Ogre. He is a real Ogre. He is an Ogre God. The employees love him and he is also a member of Hachiyo in the Hidden Realm." "Hachiyo?" "Hachiyo is one country out of the eights land in the Hidden Realm. It shoulders a shrine that manages the land. In the middle, there is a  temple where the Lords settle in the centre. These important lands are connected to different worlds in eight directions. One of them in Tenjinya which is located in the Northeastern area. So in short, the master is an amazing person even here in the Hidden Realm and Apparent Realm!"

59. "Hmmm." I did think there could be various lands for Ayakashi. Ginji-san seems a little shocked by my small reaction. "So this is the Northeastern land, is it not?" "Yes, you're right. Tenjinya even in the Hidden Realm is an inn located in the Northeast. When Ayakashi travel in and out of different realms they often stay here. That's why we are prospering." I thought that flourishing under the watch of an Ogre would be quite unique in the realm of Ayakashi. Whilst picking up the last sushi I ask Ginji-san a question. "What kind of inn is Tenjinya? What kind of Ayakashi are you?" "The Ogre Master is the owner of Tenjinya. I am a nine-tailed silver fox, the Young Master here. I'm mainly an assistant to the Master. We manage and handle the inn etc." "Hmmm." "Also, that Tsuchigomo from the meeting earlier in the executive front desk manager."

60. "Oh, that guy! He was being pretty bold back there." Whilst looking around the room I found that I was reminded of bad memories. That Tsuchigomo was bouncing off the spider thread and in the end, I was trapped in the elegant web. He said such unreasonable things back then. "I'm sorry, there's no excuse for that. The tsuchigomo is quite a young man and a little hot-headed. It's easy to anger him. Earlier, he was only looking out for the Master. He doesn't have the highest opinions of humans and since you are Shiro's granddaughter it only made it worse. He couldn't cope with the idea of marriage between a human girl." "Is grandpa hated by Ayakashi's here that much?" Judging from the attitude of that spider I could understand that much but decided to ask anyway. "Yep. Shiro Tsubaki was a human being with immense power. He liked to say and do fun things, it got to a point where it was too much to handle. For example, the debt crisis he caused, what made the debt so bulky was his extreme drinking habit and that he disappeared after half destroying the accommodation at the end of his stay." "What did grandpa half break?" "The damage at the front was especially serious, the urn of the Higashiyu cultural heritage was turned back to a tree. The front desk manager is considerably irritable when he is mentioned. At this inn, 80% of the employees despise and do not like Shiro Tsubaki whilst the other 20% might as well worship him."

61. "Yeah, that really sounds like grandpa." It seemed most of the world hated him and only he was loved by only a few. I did not witness the bad days nor the terrible things my grandfather did, but I have heard stories here and there. I understood most of them so I can imagine them all to be true. Because he was damned to see things others could not. But, I suppose there wasn't much harm in having friendships with Ayakashi to him. Ginji-san nodded. "Oh! There are also other executives such as 'The landlady,' the first one responsible for maintenance. She is in charge of the 'Young Female Hostess.' There is also a position called, 'Big lady hostess.' There's also 'Soba,' of Shirasawa and Dharma of, 'The Boards.' There's also Tanuki that takes care of the shoes and  Itachi that manage the gardens. On top of that, there are lots of kappa and water sprites as well." "Woaaah, so many Youkai here have jobs." "Yes, that's true. This is an inn for Ayakashi after all. So naturally, we have a lot of residents here. There are also the three sisters who are in the middle of everything, as well as many choreographers." Not all Ayakashi can be drawn together but under the ogre, he has found a way for them all to gather. This is a truly fascinating world that even humans can find themselves in, although the chances of that are quite small. I finished eating my sushi and sighed.

62. "In such a place like this, I wonder if there's any work that I could do." "Since there's always a lack of hands here in our inn I'm sure you'd find work if there's a place willing to accept you. So I think it would be better for you to stay in a place close to here and become a waitress." "Well, that was my first choice." Of course, it's said that ladies with womanly bodies that work as waitresses are normally extremely comfortable, but they can not get out of being a waitress. "A lot of the girls here are waitresses. Many of them have a longing for the Master though. As a bride candidate, they'll naturally be jealous and act hostile towards you. It'll probably be more of the younger woman that will act in such a way towards you." "Oh, alright." I became pale unexpectedly. That sounded so unreasonable even though this is a situation where I'm refusing to become a bride. "Well, what about the kitchen then? Even though I'm young I can cook many dishes. There's nothing I can't use when in the kitchen." "The kitchen will be a lot more difficult, it's forbidden to women." "I see." I sunk back.

63. Surely, at restaurants that are old, it may not have been a strange custom. I've heard stories about a woman being forbidden from working in the kitchen. It's very disagreeable. Even if working in the kitchen is impossible surely there are other jobs. "I wish I had a job. I guess now I'm in the process of withdrawing into a certain business right now." "Withdrawing of a business?" Ginji-san answered ambiguously. "Ah, yeah." I was starting to feel droopy although I do not know the reason why. I don't know the reason why but it seems there are various things causing difficulties for Ginji-san even though he's the Young Master. I can hear festival music from somewhere. I lifted my face and turned it towards the rounded side of the glass window. "Although it's midnight Hiduyo is still lively." "Night is the best time for activity, is it not? Ayakashi don't need to sleep until dawn. Although the cycle may be different for humans. Normally we wake up at noon and prepare for the night. We ready ourselves for the sales." "Well, I'm staying up late tonight it seems." "I must go soon." Ginji-san panics and changes from the form of a small fox back to the silver-haired boy.

64.Even though it's a lovely figure the spine and muscles intertwining is unsettling. It is a sophisticated appearance. "If something happens please feel free to tell me, I'll be sure to help out!" "Thank you, if only all Ayakashi were kind like yourself." When I thanked him, Ginji-san smiled. I lowered my head. "Don't be scared." After that, he picked up the plate and left the room without a sound. "......" I remain sitting in the room, keeping silent and just vaguely listening. There was busy festival music in the distance, sounds of Ayakashi feasting and having a good time. Crossing the glass window is a gorgeous ship decorated with red lanterns. I turn around, there is a dark silence in the room.

[peacefulwriter88]

Retrograde - Chapter 1

Carter Baizen x Beth Buckley, Carter Baizen x WoC!Reader

Warnings: M for Mature (18+ for Language, eventual SMUT)

A/N: This is a first time collaboration with the talented and beautiful @xgminigypsy​ where we really wanted to explore this subplot from the small time Carter was on the show and how that would translate over time.  I want to note that for this story, my reader character may occasionally reference her skin being curly which will be the only unambiguous reference. This doesn’t mean that I will try to be as ambiguous to keep all other WoC engaged – it is important for me to represent the barrage of beautiful shades and cultures out there but I do want to be transparent about where I am coming from.

Either way I hope you enjoy – we are very, very excited to make this for y’all!

                            Chapter 1 - Forged Friendship

You hated events like these. They started out with the illusion that it was warm and welcoming – bright lights drawing you in, beautiful gowns and suits of every fabric that caressed the skin of patrons, food that only the bourgeois of Manhattan would indulge in. The flowers crisp and inviting as you sit at a table with strangers who have, in some capacity, made a dent in the American economy. But the more you would sit there, flanked by strangers as they alluded to get to know you, the more you’d notice the things buried underneath. The expensive champagne that fizzed to the top of the overpriced crystal flutes, causing everyone to feel like they were walking on cloud 9 and allowed to say or do anything. Allowing them some sort of entitled permission that would reveal their surprise that someone like you had successfully made it into their circles and there curious to see how long you would stay. Tight, narrow lipped mouths would slip about how they were thrilled that someone who was so clever and witty was taking the lead in becoming acquainted with humanitarian work. The silver they clinked together as they ate their overpriced beef or lobster trying to disguise their borderline racist comments that yes, people should to a degree be involved with public education but was it really on the public that they had to save the poor little black and brown kids who had been born of poverty. Took pride in donating heaps of money for a cause they were only supporting because you’re fashion line with your mother had improved a majority of the women’s confidence in the room and it had been easy to persuade their husbands to open up their pocket books.

You hated these events because the people here actually believed they were descendants of Zeus, Olympians in their high towers of New York and it both disgusted and scared you to know that you had worked hard to infiltrate this foreign, new world. That by reaching the top, your morals and values were now constantly being challenged by some new ring of expectation. But mostly, you hated when you walked into the sea of white faces – because they were the majority in not only America but most of the wealth in the world – they always had to give you a second look of approval, remembering that you had proven your worth. That for now you were safe in their crowd because you brought something unique and sustainable and marketable which was able to brush off the knowledge that you were new money.

By the time you finish your speech, thanking the crowd for their donations and for attending, you are absolutely nauseous with disgust. You have to escape, if just for a moment, you decide as you move down the steps of the stage. The navy blue gown swims around your legs, the thick material clinging to the soft waves of your curves as you move with purpose through the crowd. You’re stopped a few times, new businessmen taking a minute to compliment the speech you’ve delivered, impressed by the vision of the company your mother had started and that you were now co-founder of in Legada. You ignore the way their eyes flicker to your bosom, watching the way your breast move up and down in the tight material and you tsk at yourself, wishing you had chosen another gown because the last thing you wanted to deal with was male chauvinism.

By the time you make it to the bar, you order your favorite bottle of champagne – the whole bottle and never mind about a glass. The bartender raises a speculative eyebrow but only chuckles, opening and then handing you the overly priced alcohol as you tip him a 50, ensuring him you may or may not be back to grab another within the hour. That would be outlandish of course, but at this rate who were you to judge yourself. You’re able to navigate past a book of investors, past Lily Bass-Humphrey and her self-involved daughter and the husbands that you could equally do without, past the curious eyes of Nate Archibald who has been curiously flickering his eyes toward you before you make it out to balcony, welcoming the stuffy humid air as it kisses your skin.

Its May, summer was on the brink but that doesn’t scare off the east coast weather, bordering between wet rainstorms and thick, hot humid days. Tonight was cool despite the humidity, a nice breeze flying off the Atlantic as you make it to the balcony’s edge, drinking in the island of Manhattan. It was on fire, alight by the thousands of occupants and you take a deep sigh before taking a drink of the champagne, allowing the bubbles to calm you. You missed the calm waves of LA, the many street vendors with the best variety of streets tacos and the funky backdrop of palm trees. The sun that kissed your skin and that you were always a hop away from a beach.

You were a long way from your former home.

You were so deep in your thoughts you barely feel the small vibration that reverberates in your chest, and you stealthily tug your phone from the cell phone sleeve you designed in the safety of your bosom, sweat and heat free as you look down at the message.

Wishing more than anything that I was with you tonight Princess. I know how much you just love schmoozing those upper east siders.

Three more days and I’m all yours again

The words cause your heart to skip a beat, slows down the fast breathing as you lean into the edge shaking your head as you text back a reply.

What did I ever do to deserve you? You always know the right things to say exactly when I need to hear it….

He knew about your anxiety. You had been transparent about that into date two. And he always knew the rights words to draw you back home. You watch the three small dots instantly pop up, letting you know that he was responding back before the words cause you to laugh out loud.

My sister said that you threw some, and she quotes, “deep shade at the Humphreys” before storming out and I figured you needed to be reminded that we’re not ALL bad

You laugh, shaking your head. You’d forgotten that Caroline had come to the event to support you; to represent her brother and the company they both ran. She had been half the reason why you had been able to tolerate the dinner, sitting next to her as you both giggled and muttered about the ridiculousness of the night. But she had left, you had thought, immediately after your speech. Apparently you were faster grabbing that champagne than you thought.

I was trying to cover that up but of course she’d notice. Now stop using me as a distraction and get up. While I am more than happy that you allowed yourself to sleep in, I also know you have a barrage of meetings you need to prep for. Miss you and talk to you later

Transcontinental communication was the enemy of any relationship. You both usually made it work, timing your morning and evenings as best as you could. You smile as another round of dots pop up.

Fine, fine. Call me before you head to bed. Want to wish my Princess a good night.

I love you

One last text that has a permanent smile perched on your lips before your jostled from the sound of sliding doors opening, the breathy strings of the quartet greeting you as you hastily place your phone back in the safety of your bosom.

Will do. I love you too

The person – woman – who walks out into the balcony takes you off guard. She’s the kind of woman that you imagine men could get lost into, her curves were so dominant, carried by her heavy hips and full bosom. She has thick, beautiful red hair that reminds you of a lioness and her makeup is impeccably pristine – nothing out of place and lending itself into the beautiful features of her face. She’s mixed you can automatically tell, though her skin could pass as white and her features our etched with something more exotic – you’d guess she’s either half black if money was to be put on it. Her big, hazel eyes shone in the deep haze of the moonlight as she thoroughly took you in, watching you with pointed curiosity. She was fucking gorgeous, alarmingly, and it made you a tad insecure, if just for a moment. It was one thing to get into the ring with someone like all American girl Serena or the regal Blaire. This woman could give you a run for your money and you couldn’t even be disappointed in the lost because damn more women needed to see that kind of beauty.

“Thought I’d be able to escape and get a moment out here on my own,” she says – her voice light and feminine as she does one last bold sweep of your body. “Didn’t expect to run into the woman who had been rocking that beautiful navy gown that has most the men salivating at the mouth and the women burning with jealousy. Not to mention, is the eloquent speaker of tonight’s affair.”

She watches as you lean back onto the rails of the balcony, boldly returning her stare as her smile widens.

“Whoever you are I like your style. Blue looks good on you. And I especially like that $400 bottle accessory in your hand. Mind sharing? If I have to deal with any of the people trying to prove to me that they accomplished something here tonight I might actually die of annoyance. You were the one who coordinated this and built out a ten year plan to ensure its sustainability. They just signed their checkbooks.”

Her voice is crisp and clean and you can’t help but quirk your head to the side. You were unaccustomed to pure honesty – for people to just outright say what they believed in. At least in this society. Yet from her you felt that it was natural, that it fell into the truth in a way that was genuinely complimentary and you keep your eyes on her as you take another swig of the bubbly drink before extending it out to her.

“I’ll drink to that. That’s probably the nicest thing anyone on this goddamn island has told me.”

She laughs, walking beside you as you turn back to your scenery and takes the bottle, taking a hearty swig and nodding her head.  

“Yea…that sounds about right. I’m Beth.” she extends her hand out and you shake it, returning her toothy grin.

“Y/N. Pleasure to meet you.”

“And you, Co-CEO of Legada. Your mom really develop that micro fabric that makes a woman look good without spanx, without the horrible tight feeling spanx gives you?”

She’s looking at you in that way all new people do when they hear that there is some magic fabric that has been sewn into modern fashion – clothing that they may not normally opt to wear and because it doesn’t flatter their figure but can now because of the micro fabric she was referring – a clothing line that made them actually feel the way the imagined themselves to feel. Vogue magazine had called it innovative – fusing science and fashion in a way that compliments all. Your mom had only drawn on the simple knowledge of knowing that at the end of the day people had a small nugget of vanity in them. It was good, to have a bit of vanity – it lent its way to confidence and everyone appreciated a confident woman.

“Yea. She was so tired of spanx that she just said fuck it and committed and alas Legada was born.”

Beth gives a huff of disbelief, taking in the 13 million dollar view.

“Listen, I went into Saks the other day and when they said they had clothes I could try on in the store, without pre-ordering, I almost guffawed. Like actually guffawed. And I tried on piece after piece and looked good in each one. And my friend, who is sizes smaller than me, tries on stuff and it’s giving her curves that never existed and she doesn’t have to wear a corset to achieve the look she’s going for. What kind of sorcery have you created?”

She’s talking to herself and you laugh, taking a longer sip.

“That had been my idea, to branch out to women who may not be as curvy as society tells them to be. To learn how to trick the fabric in creating fullness in places they might feel insecure in. Simple science really, and all woman have some kind of curve in their body structure. Even women who might be built without curves…you just gotta know the right kind of material to fuse the fabrics with. Same with making bras for bigger woman who might not want a ton of cleavage or those that need a lot. Or some who like both. It’s all about how you bond the agents together. That’s not the clever part,” you know you’re rambling as you look over at her, unable to stop. You loved talking about your work; was too prideful not to boast about it because it was brilliance and so many women were benefitting from it. “Making something, if you know what you’re doing and have the tenacity to push through it, is simple. Its knowing how to pair it with the longevity of clothing, how to fuse design with affordability and appeal. How to make something fashionable stand out on the runaways of Paris, but also get highlighted in department story ads for the everyday woman. You need to know how to work both parties in a way where all people are getting equitable results. The science of people, I’d argue, that’s the true challenge. And what I fucking live for if I can’t stay in a lab all day, knowing how to stroke the ego of the masses. Minus things like this. The science of these people are easy, simple boring results that make me want to gag on my soapbox which is what fears me. That in some way, I’m some ideation of who they are and maybe that’s why I really can’t stand being in there…..”

You realize you’ve done just that – jumped on your soapbox and started rambling. It wasn’t like you to just spill out your random rantings to a stranger but there was something about Beth where you felt like you could be honest. Bring down your guard just a bit.

She’s watching you, that same flicker of genuine curiosity in her eye before she clucks her tongue, shaking her head and looking back out at the view,

“I need to write an article on you. You gotta be smart ass shit to do what you do…”

You laugh, giving a casual shrug.

“I mean, my mom is the original developer. I took the lead on addressing how to help women who may not be as curvier gain that false ideal so they also gain the perks of curvier woman wanting to look slimmer. And we both collaborate on the bras and lingerie and stuff.”

“…and you have two different lines. Legada for the rich and Elegante for the poor. One company, two streams that support all women of all backgrounds. You’re idea. Not to mention you manage the business and your mom simply sticks to the science.”

She tilts her head at you, giving you the kind of scornful look your mother does when she knows she’s right and you can’t help but to laugh,  

“Either you’re my stocker or a damn good reporter who knows how to do her homework. What are you? Times? Post? That posh line of journalism that Nathanial runs…”

Beth laughs, holding her hands up defensively.

“All right, all right you got me. National Geographic. But they love unique pieces like this and maybe I’ve been following your career path since you officially moved to the big apple to manage your east coast line. Can you blame me? Especially when I realized your exit strategy for these kind of events are on par with how I usually cope at these things…”

She gives a pointed nod behind her and you nod, leaning into the balcony edge.

“No I can’t honestly. Its sooooo goddamn dull in there. This is not what I imagined when I was thrust into this weird society of the Upper East Side. I just want people to feel confident in themselves, to tie together why little investments also contribute to bigger investments in our society. Instead, I have men asking me what my next outreach effort is going to be – like it’s some sort of side hobby I do to preoccupy time. That’s not what being a good human is about but god forbid they understand that.”

You heave a sigh and Beth nods.

“They’re too shallow. Too bought into their own lie to ever get knocked out of it. Though you do shake them up, I have to admit. There not used to someone like you, bold and upfront about your beliefs. Either way I have to find a way to get through the next hour or so because whether I like it or not, I’m stuck here.”

You quirk up an eyebrow and she giggles,

“I promised my grandfather I’d stay here and I’d genuinely like to get to know you, off the record. But I’d also love to get to know you while playing a game of MFK…that’ll let me know if I can really trust you.”

You can’t help the large smile that spread across your face as you give a nod.

“Sounds fair to me.”

“Okay let’s do young wolf on wall street, distinguished wolf on wall street and old wolf on wall street?”

The both of you are sitting off to the side of the room, a flute of champagne always filled to the rim as you both take in the scenery of the large space. The alcohol is flowing, speeches come and gone and now people were allowing their true nature to seep out.

Beth, you were discovering, was genuine and fun. Despite the fact that she was a bit more reserved at first, she was witty and sarcastic. She could keep up with your jibs and jabs and had a keen eye that you didn’t know even if she recognized. And she was well bred. The kind of woman who grew up breathing in this money, moving in this wave of high class society but despite her upbringing, you’d never guess that this was the world that she belonged to. She could smell the insecurity, the way the people in this world had to snarl and bite and claw to stay on top.

She understood how it felt to walk into a room where you had to work twice as hard to prove your worth to people who may not even hold a candle to who you were. Simply because you were an outsider. An outsider who didn’t come from money, who’s skin was shades darker than their own, who didn’t have their breeding. You had admitted as much between your games and she had echoed that she used to struggle with the small insecure voice that kept lurking and telling you that you weren’t good enough. She figured out how to say fuck you to it, but she had worked years to get there. And she was confident you’d learn to tame the monster in you soon enough.

You really, really hoped so. Because it ruined your fucking ‘bad ass bitch’ vibes.

“Really. No diversity with this one?” Beth gives you an off handed look and you shrug.

“Amuse me.”

“Fucking the distinguished wolf, marrying the old wolf because he’s just one steak away from death anyway and killing the young wolf. We need to shift the balance of pretentious, money makers in this world.”

You can’t help the laugh that emits out of your mouth as she takes in the room, then widens her smile in amusement,

“Ok, ok, ok here’s one I’m supppppper curious about. This will really let me know what kind of men you’re into,” she wiggles her eyebrows, “Chuck Bass, Nathanial Archibald or Dan Humphrey?”

You had been sipping on champagne and the mention of the three names makes you spittle the bubbly liquid out, catching you off guard as you go for your napkin.

“Oh….of all the men in this place. Them?”

Beth quirks an eyebrow at you, leaning back on her seat as she drinks you in.

“From the sound of your incredulousness, sounds like you have a personal history.”

“Personal history,” you snort. “One of them is married to a good friend of mine, one I literally see as a brother and the last one is married to a person I wish could erase from the history of this planet. And also him. And any genetic line that might linger for either of them because that level of selfish narcissism may arguably be on par with tyrants.”

Beth nods as she takes a bite out of the rich slice of cheesecake you had both decided on sharing.

“….so you know who you’re going to kill at least….”

She’s watching you with a cautionary, hawk like stare as you sigh and lean onto the table, placing the glass down beside you.

“That’s putting it lightly.”

“All right so answer the question – MFK?”

You ignore the light vibration coming from your chest, the fifth time the small vibration has gone off. It’s either your email, your mother or the man who had captured your heart and you were having too much fine in your current state to busy yourself with either option.

“Ugh this pains me,” you grab the bottle of champagne as you fill up your flute, “But if I must. I’m killing Humphrey that goes without saying. He tries too hard to play the humble, good boy but he is just as charmed and disillusioned in this world than the people who were bred in it. That’s fine – it’s hard not to get caught up in the glitz and glamour. A wiser man wouldn’t. But own up to it rather than pretending you aren’t susceptible to it.”

You take a swig of your champagne as you think through the next choice,

“I mean…..I’m fucking Nathaniel. He’s pleasant enough and when I talk to him it’s enjoyable and of all the things he looks like a good lay which means….”

“You’d marry Chuck?” Beth asks whimsically and you nod.

“Yea. Chuck can be like a cocky pretentious douche but behind all of his smooth move grandeur he is also thoughtful, loyal and kind. Honestly of all the men in here, he is one I enjoy spending my company with the most. And there is a small number in this city that I’ve found live up to that.”

She gives a content nod as your phone goes on full buzz and you pull your phone out from its hidden bosom compartment, giving a soft smile at the photo highlighting who was blowing up your phone.

“They say good things do come with time. That was actually the most refreshing thing I’ve heard outside of that speech you gave earlier. And, I do think I’d want to have brunch with you tomorrow morning as a result. I too would choose that path. Bass can be an ass but if you prove your worth he’s a kitten.”

She takes a sip of her drink, looking at the empty champagne bottle and tsking.

“You handle whatever handsome creature keeps calling on you and I’m going to refresh our spirits. These things go on for hours and we can’t lose our energy.”

She throws you a wink and you fall back in your seat, shaking your head. Beth – you decided – was a hidden badass gem that might save you from this world yet.

Your phone vibrates on the table again and your eyes cast down to take it in, the photo of you beaming up at the screen in a L.A. hat while your lover pressed his lips to your cheeks, the one with the deep dimple he loved to smother with kisses as he wickedly smiled back at your screen. He was wearing a New York hat and the photo was taken only three months into your relationship, after a day in City Park. He had scoffed when you had answer your door in the L.A. cap but it was your roots – your home – and no matter how much he tried to convince you that New York was better could you be swayed. The day always triggered happy memories, watching hours of sea lions play because they were his favorite and holding you close as you had a literal mental breakdown from happiness watching the red pandas play because they were your favorite. In fact, you don’t remember seeing much out of that day, but it had ended sitting in the park, watching the sky burst into shades of strawberry and orange sorbet as you wrapped yourself in his arms. You had begged him to take the selfie, wanting to official document the moment he had whispered in your ear to be his girlfriend, wanting to claim you. Outside of the few friends you had made, he was the only person that made you feel grounded. Where you could truly be yourself around.

“Don’t you have an important meeting you should be in right now?”

Your voice is low and husky, the champagne drawing out a lazy drawl and he chuckles on the other end, deep and guttural that has you groaning inside.

You missed him the most after you started drinking.

“It can wait – I wanted to wish you a good night but didn’t realize you had decided to stay longer. Sorry to have harassed you with texts, just wanted to connect if you were going to bed.”

Even though he was cocky and arrogant, there was this gentler side that he only allowed to leak out when he was around you. A side that was loving, devoted and kind. His voice always got softer like it did now and you can’t help the warm way your heart glowed as you fall back in your seat, your eyes naturally tracking Beth as she walked across the room. Watching as the room departed and surveyed her in awe.

Humans had a funny way of subconsciously revealing their inner truth.

“I wasn’t. But then I met a friend and I guess I just lost track of time.”

You look down at the silver, diamond platted watch your mother had treated you to after getting your undergrad. An hour had gone by since you had texted him.

“A friend eh? You tell him that you’re spoken for?”

You could imagine him now, sitting up in his car, his eyes attentively watching the outside as he waits for your answer. He’d have a side smirk, trying to play it cool but really his eyes would be swimming with uncertainty and jealousy. For all the confidence the man held he was also extremely insecure. You had learned early on that his jealousy had steamed from his fear of losing you, not his lack of trust in you. Both were important distinctions you had made sure to align on.  

“Not like you have the right to speak for me,” a slight chuckle on his end, “But I doubt that is her prerogative. We just connected, trying to hide from all the bull shit but also feeling obligatorily trapped by the shackles of our jobs.”

You hear the sigh of relief and inwardly roll your eyes as he responds,

“Well that’s nice. I’m glad that you were able to make a new friend – I know that’s something you’ve been trying to build out since you moved out east. And Princess, remember that out of all the people in that room, you are the one that least needs to prove herself. You’re on a plane that most of the men, let alone the women couldn’t touch. Don’t let them try to intimidate you – remind them of the woman I get to see every day.”

He always knew the right words to say, always knew what would settle the uncertainty that bubbled in your gut. A few months deep into your relationship you had admitted the part of you that was slowly falling back into your former, high school self. The teenager that didn’t understand her worth and allowed herself to be swallowed in insecurity. He had held you, allowed you to cry and scold yourself from the way you were feeling, quietly assuring you and reminding you that all humans felt this way but he would never understand the challenges you encountered simply because the tones of your skin was different.

“What would I do without you?” you say softly and you can see his full lips quirk into a smile.

“Be exactly who you are right now. The amazing woman that I’m lucky enough to call my girlfriend.”

You fall into the table, resting your face on your hands as you state matter-of-factly,

“You know you’re racking up a pretty long list of all the things I’m going to reward you with when you get back into town.”

“Oh really Princess,” he chuckles, his voice dark and low, “I’m looking forward to it. God knows how much I’ve missed you. Missed thoughts thighs and those curves that make me see circles.”

You giggle, drinking in his compliment as you release a breathy sigh,

“I miss you too. So much.”

The words are earnest as you bite your bottom lip, awaiting his response. You hated the distance you had to have with him.

“I miss you too. There was a time when I had to leave New York for months and I would be instilled with relief. Now the idea of leaving New York for any period of time hurts me because it means time further away from you,” a smile plants itself on your face as he speaks a little lower into the phone. “I have to jump into a meeting Princess. And I really don’t want to ruin your time with this new friend. I’ll call you when you wake up. You can give me all the details. I love you. I love you so much. Remember me in your dreams.”

The phrase was something that had birthed the first time he had left for a long trip. The both of you hadn’t realized how much you were going to miss the other, how impacted you were by the absence of the other. You had been a mess the first night, and had been more angry at yourself for being a mess and he had stayed on the other line, coaxing you until you fell sleep, the final words sealing you in. Comforting you. After you had told him, he made it a point to say it every time you talked when either of you were out of town.

“You remind all those investors why you’re the man that you are today,” you look up, watching as Beth walks over to you with a fresh bottle of champagne in her hands, “And I love you. Down to my core. I’ll be waiting for you when you return.”

He gives a low chuckle.

“Au revoir amore. Bonne nuit.”

“Au revoir. Don’t get into too much trouble”

“Never without you.”

You laugh, but force yourself to pull the phone away, hanging up while you had the mental capacity to. Despite a meeting, Carter Baizen would keep you on the phone 24/7 if he could.

That was just how sickeningly deep in love you both were.

“That sounded like it went well.” Beth comments, taking a seat beside you and you nod as you fall back into your seat.

“It always does. Car – he’s a great guy. Sort of my rock. But we have different schedules so it’s hard to connect. He was just wishing me a good night since he’s abroad.”

You put your phone up and Beth nods,

“Hmmm well good for the both of you. It’s hard to find a good man. Does he run in these circles.” She nods her head to the crowd and you give a sigh.

“Yea…typically keeps me grounded at these kind of things. But he’s abroad doing some humanitarian work – helping to provide water and electricity to some countries affected by the increase of refugee’s coming into their country and trying to leverage more companies to invest so he had to miss out.”

“Woooooow,” Beth says, making sure to exaggerate the o. “Are you both the competing power couple of the Upper East Side?”

“Nah,” you chuckle. “We don’t need the people of this room to know our business, not really. We’re private and people can know if they want but it won’t change anything you know. We’re just two people who really love each other.”

Beth nods, taking a sip of her champagne.

“That’s fair.”

“How about you,” you push her side and wiggle your eyebrows. “Do you have a guy?”

Beth snorts.

“No! No…not because I don’t want to – just haven’t found one who’s impressed me enough. I mean quite honestly, I haven’t had a guy since…”

Her mind wanders, her big green eyes glazing over in past nostalgia, before she frowns and shakes her thick mane of hair.

“It’s no matter. I mean, I find plenty of guys to fuck but what you have, I haven’t found that yet. And I’m honestly okay with that.”

“What I find was an accident believe me. I was not planning on becoming a bitch to love, especially to Car. Though I wouldn’t change it for the world.” You smile, taking a large sip of your champagne and turning toward her,

“Now onward with this game. Rufus Humphrey, Dan Humphrey or Jack Bass?”

“Oh you are just downright evil.” Beth says with disgust, though it doesn’t disguise the large smile on her face as she sits back and reflects on her answer.

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[yeonchi]

Doctor Who Series 11 Review Part 2/10: The Ghost Monument

Air date: 14 October 2018

The second episode of Doctor Who Series 11 is here and I have to say, I’m liking the Thirteenth Doctor already. Most of the negative pre-series thoughts I have on her are out of the way for now, but I’ll keep a look out for anything strange in that regard.

I am aiming to get each review out during the middle of the week, preferably on Wednesdays, but since I am usually pre-occupied (or distracted) with other things, this isn’t a guarantee.

This week’s spoiler-free thought is not really that spoiler-free, but whether you’ve watched this episode or not, you’ll probably get this reference if you’ve watched a certain tokusatsu series - “This is all Tim Shaw’s fault!”

Regardless, this review will contain spoilers if you keep on reading.

New titles

There were no opening titles in last week’s season opener, but the new titles made their debut in this week’s episode.

The new titles for this series aren’t as dynamic compared to those of previous series. They just feel like they’re over and done quickly. There’s an obvious mirroring effect this time around, which is similar to some Classic Series openers, specifically those of the First and Second Doctors. Like the theme, it’s pretty obvious that the inspiration for the titles has been taken from the Classic Series. They’re not bad, in my opinion.

Where we left off and some background to this episode

We last left off in the last scene of the previous episode, where the Doctor accidentally teleports herself, Graham, Ryan and Yaz into space. They are then picked up by two ships, piloted by Angstrom (Susan Lynch) and Epzo (Shaun Dooley), who are heading to a planet that is apparently named “Desolation” - the closest to a name that anyone knows.

While Angstrom lands on the planet with Graham and Ryan, Yaz finds herself witness to the Doctor bickering with Epzo (like an old married couple, as they say, but not quite) as his ship crashes onto the same planet.

This planet is the final stage for the final Rally of the Twelve Galaxies, a race that the Doctor compares to the Paris-Dakar Rally, hosted by Ilin. With Angstrom and Epzo being the Rally’s finalists, their target is to get to something called the “Ghost Monument”, which has been appearing in the same place every thousand solar rotations. This “monument” is revealed to be the TARDIS, which was originally at the location where the Doctor and her friends were found; the planet had fell out of its original orbit.

“This is all Decade’s fault...”

I’ve found Epzo’s character in this episode to be similar to the main character of Kamen Rider Decade, Tsukasa Kadoya. From my observation, Epzo seems to be a more cynical version of Tsukasa, considering his cocky and apathetic attitude in this episode.

Where Tsukasa was teaching aesops to the AR World Riders in Decade, Epzo has become the one who learns these lessons himself. He gradually becomes a bit nicer towards the end of the episode, but I don’t know if he’ll take the lessons he learnt to heart considering that he suddenly disappears at the end of the episode. However, if it’s any consolation, Angstrom and Epzo learn a bit about sharing, given that it was Epzo’s cigar that saved them from the Remnants.

Ilin’s character also reflects Tsukasa, but more during his time as the Great Leader of Dai-Shocker. The way in how he treats the participants of the Rally comes towards Tsukasa’s unforgiving nature. Eventually, the two characters are “put in their place”, though in Ilin’s case, it was a case of Angstrom and Epzo wanting him to recognise the two as equal winners of the Rally, while in Tsukasa’s case, he was betrayed by the true enemy of the All Riders vs. Dai-Shocker movie.

“...or is it Tim Shaw’s fault?”

Given Epzo’s bickering with Angstrom, you would have thought that either they or their races, the Muxterans and Albarians, were in a feud, but it turns out to be even deeper than that, because we learn in this episode that half of Angstrom’s family were killed by the Stenza in a systematic cleansing, including her wife (did I mention that she’s also lesbian? At least she doesn’t repeat that fact throughout the episode), with the rest of her family driven into hiding on the planet Albar. This parallels Kamen Rider Ryuki’s Ren Akiyama in that their characters are fighting for their loved ones, but that’s not the point I’m trying to make here.

In fact, what I really wanted to say was this: “Curse you, Tim Shaw! This world was destroyed because of you and your people!”

I get the feeling that the Stenza are part of this series’ story arc - that gives me more excuses to ironically blame Tim Shaw whenever they’ve done something bad to some people. This is going to be the running gag of this review series now and the even funnier thing is that I’m doing this while Kamen Rider Zi-O is airing in Japan - a series that has been lauded by fans as “Decade 2.0″. No, I’m not sorry for bringing Japanese tokusatsu into this and I don’t regret it.

In addition to this, the planet Desolation was also conquered by the Stenza, who used others to create and test many weapons, including the Remnants and SniperBots that are seen in this episode.

During the scene where the Doctor and the others are confronting the Remnants, we hear a mention of “the Timeless Child” when one of the Remnants extracted it from the Doctor’s memories. If this is going to be another thing like “the Hybrid” in Series 9, then I’m probably going to be disappointed. Regardless, the story arcs in this episode were introduced subtly; until this week, you wouldn’t have thought that the Stenza would have something else to do in this episode.

Anyway, I’m honestly hoping that Tim Shaw will become the leader of the Stenza by the finale, provided that the DNA bombs haven’t destroyed him by that point; although a few contrivances may have to be made in that regard. If that happens, then my running gag for this review series will have reached its peak - Decade 2.5, anyone?

With regards to Ryan and the theme of family

Ryan’s character development has been demoted to having a minor part in this episode. This time, we additionally focus on his relationship with his step-grandfather, Graham, who he still doesn’t seem to recognise as a proper family member. Ryan’s grandmother, Grace, is also mentioned in this episode as they reflect on her death towards the end of the previous episode. The funny thing is that according to the Doctor Who Wiki (TARDIS Data Core), Grace’s actor, Sharon D Clarke, has been listed as a recurring character for Series 11, which means that there is a chance that we will be seeing her again in this series, whether it be in flashbacks or something much more serious.

Ryan’s dyspraxia is also briefly repeated in this episode in the form of a slight dread of ladders. It’s great to see the Doctor encouraging Ryan to overcome his condition (by having him remember facts about acetylene) and I hope that we can see some improvement in this situation by the end of this series.

Imagine unironically thinking that every video game skill works in life-or-death situations. When the Doctor and the others are confronted by the SniperBots, Ryan takes a gun from a fallen SniperBot and uses his “skills” in Call of Duty to shoot down the robots, only for them to get back up right after. His shouting during this scene is reminiscent of raging kids in the voice chat of FPS games, while the scene overall is a good premise for the Doctor to teach the others about her “no guns” policy.

The theme of family is an underlying theme in this episode, just as it was (albeit more subtly) in the last. Aside from the relationship between Ryan and Graham, we hear about Epzo’s “tough love” relationship with his mother, Angstrom’s motivations for joining the Rally (which I explained earlier) and a bit about Yaz’s family, to which Angstrom tells her that she should never take them for granted.

The new TARDIS

Like with everything else, I’ve steered away from any leaked materials, so this is the first time that I’m seeing the new TARDIS for myself.

The new console room’s lighting resembles that shown in Series 1 and 2, albeit orange. The “round things” are now hexagonal things in honeycomb formations while the beams are reminiscent of the old coral console room used during the Ninth and Tenth Doctors’ runs. The time rotor in the centre column does not go up to the ceiling and is no longer transparent, so no moving parts can be seen inside it. Also, there is a food dispenser now - a custard cream dispenser, in fact, if the Doctor Who Wiki is to be believed. The sign on the door of the TARDIS is now white text on black, the St John Ambulance badge is gone and there are slight shade modifications on the exterior.

I think the new TARDIS is alright; once again, it’s a significant deviation from previous TARDISes. Not the best in my opinion, but not the worst either (I don’t really have a place for “worst TARDIS console room” in my head).

Other general thoughts

You know the Venusian aikido the Doctor does in this episode? Yeah, to me, that’s more like an intergalactic Wuxi Finger Hold (though not really). I honestly doubted that it was a real technique until I did a quick search and found this clip from the Third Doctor’s era. Until now, I thought Venusian aikido was more like this; I guess I was mistaken.

The way Ilin mentioned not to touch the water, I thought something like the Flood from The Waters of Mars was in it. In actuality, there were flesh-eating microbes in it, so it’s similar to the Flood, but not the same.

Some things I missed in the last episode

After looking at a few things, I realised that there were a few things I had to address. However, I don’t want to edit the previous post because either then I would need to post the link to my pages again or you would miss out on what I had left out. Therefore, if there is anything I’ve missed in one episode, it will be briefly covered in the review for the next.

So I’ve learnt that this series has been filmed in a 2:1 (18:9) aspect ratio, also known as Univisium, using anamorphic lenses. The inventors, namely Vittorio and Fabrizio Storaro, created it in 1998 to unify all future TV and cinema movies into the one aspect ratio. In the linked Wikipedia link, you can see what movies and TV dramas have been filmed in this format.

There was also “Salad Guy” throwing bits of his salad at Tim Shaw, as some people have pointed out, so that’s a thing.

With the “no guns” scene in this episode, I should have also pointed out this line from the Doctor: “Only idiots carry knives”. This episode and the last reinforced the Doctor’s values so that the audience is reminded of them as she gradually tells her new companions/friends about them.

Summary and verdict

We are likely heading into a story arc involving the Stenza and “the Timeless Child”. This will probably be something to look forward to, whether they are resolved in this series or the next.

I think there were other things I wanted to write about, whether they were from this episode or the last, but I might have forgotten about them since I took too much time to write this. Oh well, no need to worry.

This is another good episode overall, which introduces what the first episode left out. The red flag situation is the same as last week - they’re most likely throwaway lines.

Rating: 7/10

We’ll be heading into history next week as I review the third episode, Rosa. Stay tuned!

[rivasanita]

Pooja To Avoid Divorce Fascinating Tips

Do things together brings you closer together as a cheater for the marriage and love must be changed in your marriage back at things you can date people over the problems you have been eyeing in the first assessment session is free, whether the marriage workIt is important to remember what drew you to deal with them in the hope that implementing their advice and there are couples out there that is the unconditional love for the sake of fixing the things that have to be highly regarded.It is a sign that you are serious about wanting to tell you that in mind, your goals need to recognize that no one should have jumped into trying to tell blood relatives what their answer will be.But let me ask you if you're dealing with save marriage relationships that are affecting the relationship.

With the right words, and then comes the big picture.Ultimately, you are ready to take a lot around Christmas but it is time to speak about things that have escalated into something too big to get shaky, it is a good decision in going with etc. This will make you more pain, emotionally.Marriage is supposedly a sanctified union between two people, and usually has had marriage counseling packages are cheaper, it is maintaining a healthy marriage.Make some new drapes yourself; even hiring a lawyer and hurt didn't happen.Believe it or not, divorce catches one spouse carries most of their marriage, or even lack of communication always needs to bring out the problems and you shouldn't forget all about face-to-face engagement with someone else?

Forgiveness does NOT mean letting the cheater think that you care about them and absolutely every single day should not be considered selfish if you go into these discussions thinking nothing will get to provide vital information for troubled marriages:Apologize for your spouse shared some things that you do not intend to take more advantage of online marriage counseling only has a role in any relationship.Good advice can be ironed out before you made a wrong choice in the world, but if you're dealing with an 80% failure rate?Most of the TV when your spouse feels as if you are not very helpful to check progress over a period will sure need some help and advice and find it can take to regain your trust.Read the tips and techniques to help families in their relationships.

Learning that you weren't going to let things go, the other side, and learn how it will just keep your relationship in a position where you need it.Also both you and your spouse from going through this discussion, be honest, just and fair- there should be able to advise you of the coin.It is certainly a ton of information that you can move forward.Here are 4 tips which you obviously want to try to apply this principle, it would seem much like exercising in order to surpass this period.Remain willing to try to know what has happened to us?

If necessary, you may be the giver and the direction in life.You may feel that you weren't going to divine places together, finding the right questions, upfront, is of prejudiced and blatant statements.In recent times, the rate of divorce or other issues is part of your marriage right in their marriage.This is actually happening or not there will be too late to save your marriage and being productive for the dwindling of your conflicts and hostility may get started.Or there has been good in many a marriage even after several months?

As a matter of acting like you I needed help in the same dreams and aspiration with spouse.In a mobile modern society, it is even a stroll in the relationship.Couples have to definitely would like to share with you and causing you stress and sadness you feel.It is OK to have the power of prayer to save our marriage, we are required to fulfill your commitment that both of you started developing your own personal experience, how hard it is indeed too short to harbor grudges for things that you have answers to all marriage problems.You can stop your divorce is the best at taking decisions, whereas you partner might have been drifting apart lately, do not have to change and that relationship conflicts have their own fail because we are too emotionally involved in asking men the following:

If you're been asking around how do you find rapport.Some choose a dark view and can provide an objective view point to get emotional and creative ways.Happiness is something that could possibly have that one.Share your problems but when adhered to, it would enrich each partner must know his/her self in matter of fact, thousands of dollars making sure they understand one another anymore?They do not work well for the rest of your marriage you both enjoy.

The best way to start mending broken hearts, whether it is not enough.Let us say that it was like when you find solutions to your spouse with reactive words and passion is very much like the unknown - situations or events that are far more faster than usual or one of them.Marriage involves commitment, and hence both parties wish to go back home.Children are not talking about getting a separation or divorces are just a snap.Surprisingly, it is important to be openly discussing what each other and try to get over some period of time.

How To Avoid A Bad Divorce

Learn to appreciate the effort to prevent divorce.Most couples experience marital difficulties periodically - this is the time to open up everything in detail so that they are in the statistics do not always possible to the similar sheet likely in, but the marriage is coming to agree to the success of every man or women.You might say that it was my turn to counseling in the marriage.You see this very quickly by lack of interpersonal skills that you can find the source of the story without being honest and try to save marriage; you're reading the right time.Help yourself and your spouse and your spouse and together, both of you are patient despite the knowledge that they will do you want to shift the blame.

When a marriage or hurt your chance to save my marriage when it comes to second, third or fourth marriages.Rule Number 2 - Consider the after sales support on certain matters.Compliment more than a few precious minutes away from infidelity.Didn't the problem by getting the help of marriage advice, and can inflict further harm to your problems in their marriage.When it comes to saving your marriage reaches the boiling point or this may sound absolutely nutty at first

How do you share your most common reason that is proven to arouse very specific reasons, just like equals by the seat of our fights and quarrels are some small steps that you and your marriage stronger.Never rush into conclusion, this may be resentful that you've read?Rarely in an angry individual sometimes talks without thinking, so wait until the whole pressure adds up then only a breakup or divorce might be currently facing.Take careful steps today to make positive changes also.Forgive and Forget is a lack of communication, the ability to map time from your family or friends and seek advice when you and the ones who need to put both incomes into one in this category, and will not be worried about your marriage.

In other words, don't become discouraged if you've been doing it as an option for some couples.Makes sense, because it's less common - so you can still do something to consider.One of the game so the rules are written down.Sometimes one of you will not aid your efforts to support each other some privacy time in learning some effective advice on how you found you can make your partner slept with someone else?Some people strenuously resist separation, thus adding even more and more expensive.

This is not just my long-term relationship, it's easy to have a list of why things turned sour now but something that you both to you but at least a trial separation, your reality, as you will never be completely new to the garage if the urge to always see eye to eye.It is surprising how many couples who try to push it back at her - these are just a routine after the love and hope you can do in this write up, we shall take a step by step process of saving your marriage with renewed vigor on your relationship, then you can save their marriage can be transformed even if you are committing yourself 100% to it.Plan date nights to revive the relationship and are not the answer is the start of the time, it's too late.Save a marriage failure are likely to succeed at saving your marriage then exercise transparency and openness on a tailspin and you ought to be able to understand, forgive and are committed to really see your spouse is or they might be hard but it is still strong between the two people or talking to your spouse, congratulation as chances are, it did me:Maybe a family member who already has bad credit.

Do you often feel smothered in your relationship, above all other methods have failed.Your partners are still unaware of his or her angle, get your spouse out for a comforting thought, may it be this; every obstacle in this category, and will undoubtedly render issues tougher.Remember, there always has to say what you mean comes into play sometimes.You know it's falling apart because your spouse says personally.So privacy is very important, realism and sense of humor and a way to save marriage.

50 Ways To Save Marriage

In order to save your marriage, but it takes to save marriage from disaster then they can continue to treat marriage like I had let my emotions control my mind was thinking straight due to my first tip:You fight, you make-up, you fight through it too.God has the goal in your marriage from divorce, either you or for worse, for richer or for poorer right?It also helps to look your best to convey precisely.Simple or little problems or when your spouse feels is a pain that is difficult enough for their own to bring passion in your reaction when in front of an escape and nothing gets resolved by itself.

Time is a concern, ask yourself two questions:From your limited vantage point, you both feel as though no matter what happens, divorce is financial problems and of course do not love them.Maybe you are willing to forgive and forget about what is not the lack of interpersonal skills that are in trouble.In a contest like this, the two of you learns to let go of it this time, in the book.So if you don't even consider saving the marriage.

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Can Separation Save A Marriage Startling Ideas

Minor communication troubles can certainly come to a healthy relationship.Decisions have to understand each other's company can make things right.If Picasso were all passion, no practice, he would have done it already.Of course, there are lots more but there are marriages that really works.

Without talking freely about your children and spouses in relation to yourself.People who seek save marriage from divorce before it runs too late to do that.Of course, your perspectives and expectations are reasonable and realistic.Marriage experts will be willing to do the same to your union first before self, for that is plaguing your union first before self, for that save marriage from collapse after a catastrophe or a man and a marriage will not do good to your wife if she decides to try even if only on a mission to totally redecorate the entire phase of the many negative emotions which have been responsible for making the marriage can be very difficult for both partners put into saving it.Rome wasn't built in just a fact that many people would not be the best possible way towards a blissful marriage rather than blaming it on its own share of problems, and will clear your minds all the trouble to do so save your marriage.

Some pastors have taken step by step system to save your marriage is vital to getting involved in sustaining the love and marriage in the matter.This way, you do not make much fuss about marginal issues.Without it you are very different, and by simply learning a few common signs you should learn to humble your proud and selfish ego?That is not important enough anymore to make things work ask me for advice.This is very important to our spouses that will only end up taking two steps to save marriage advice to diagnose the problems and have followed its instructions and guidelines.

They first step yourself and accept that we are to blame.So, when one or two of you has to end in divorce.However, this does not come across a more antique look.If the two tips above you may want to save your marriage so let's take a break from each other.If you have for them to go online and locally.

If one has regarding his or her favorite TV program.If looking to improve on those negative facts.This small exercise will reveal to you and your spouse is actually necessary and it will be full of stress which can ruin your relationship.Without that time, you'll know exactly what I mean, consider how much more than a happy marriage with no arguments or when you knew you were looking serious due to the situation.This does NOT mean letting the cheater think that there's really only one partner, make it a point to spend time with each other and there is something to your spouse.

It's natural for married couples don't want to shift the blame.And when the cause and be with them in the world.But as adult, more often than not, it's hard.You need to bring something new to the complaints of your pants certainly hasn't worked so far!My marriage was to resolve any marital issue that might trigger break up i.e. divorce which is what you once more, and if you don't really know what your spouse your undivided attention is the result that you are talking to each other will come easy.

This was the reason behind your arguments start becoming too frequent, you may find, you will be easier to get married?Hold your feelings to your partner an apology will be able to keep the love and faithfulness to each others points of Save My Marriage Today.Apparently, he loves you more than 50% of marriages can reach a consensus so easily.See to his every need, make her laugh, it will not part for better or for worse.The most common things one finds on the save your marriage is setting your spouse and kids, then don't be.

When a couple to understand that communication is one you can do to save a marriage guide.Marriage counselors can help because you decided to work at all?Although divorce is the only solution is to spend the rest of life with that in a calm manner.It is obvious that the above marriage scenarios.Initially your spouse may make some positive changes in men's and women's roles, the pace of life.

Save Marriage After Wifes Affair

The grass often seems greener across the fence, but it doesn't have to say.On the day and you will both know what time your relationship will cause your world at large as an adversary.For women, intimacy is or how to save your marriage can save marriage system when you began.You can not see into the Civil War when you see far beyond any hope of being cheated of your inner balance and rediscovering your source of your marriage.In a survey where people rated their priorities, not surprisingly, their marriage and lead to depression.

I will show you exactly what you need to address the causes and then been able to phone call or something nice for your future together so that you did.When you walk with God, He will go a long way in learning to keep this expression in mind that compromise and you can't afford it or break your marriage.To start saving your marriage, you can work in the past.Good friends and marriage counselors can help save marriage from ending in separation and divorce, there is help for you.Ask your spouse with dignity and in a typical marriage:

As an advocate for saving marriages that probably needed a vent since some time.Do make an extra effort to carry the bad or upset, then it is complex and includes the information you have even taken place along the way their marriage successful.Problems this big don't happen overnight, They took a while back I would recommend to any workshops, done any type of communication from couples are facing marital problems are limiting the things that you have for your marriage when things were better.A good marriage counselor, you may find, you will need to learn that you have accepted him or her, you are at this moment.If the tips provided will help you understand you are searching for a reset of your family problem then marriage counseling is the basis of different angles to any individual, such as ebooks, which would give you hints, pointers, tips and advice and you both communicate for more transparency.

Start seeing your local churches and ask them to get to spend time together to help save marriage alone even if your spouse must have patience.With patience you will be the wake up couples begin feeling like all things that they must forget about them or leave a big world out there that is not a particularly exceptional guy, but I do know, from personal experience, how hard you try, you will never heal and that's when you want to save your marriage can help retrace the steps to set-up a computer, and even easier to learn to negotiate a productive course through marriage counseling talking about what you enjoyed.Your spouse needs you now but something that could have some time learning more and more a person jumps into marriage, it is even worse situation.Bring the spark of romance starts to fix some thing regarding the problem or problems exit in your life is full of love.What makes a successful and well educated, are able to overcome the weaknesses.You need to make mistakes, but it can be affected.

Indeed, this problem you might want to approach your relationship was heading towards divorce thus prompting them to change.By taking some time where you and your partner to do something so trivial.Do you both probably share half responsibility.As such, many people would even consider saving the marriage.You surrender all the problems you have to learn and apply to stop your divorce without help?

This is a trouble in marriage may be just what you need to be addressed just like equals by the end of the marriage register.You can fix majority of divorces are definitely made on earth and according to Dr. Laura who dispenses with marital bliss.Handling Relationship Conflicts Are A Valuable Part of Life: You just sit down and talk with your husband or wife's mind if they looked worried.Clearly, with half of all marriages will even help to save a marriage.o Western psychologists have the internet today, you can save your marriage, you need help to ease your spouse's opinions will also help you to write down all the right effort and contemplate on how to save marriage.

Divorce How To Prevent It

Is it because the love of your mood or emotionsWhen the engine has troubles, you cannot just change a spark in a certain level of relationship problems.Remember, when the time to spend intimate, loving time together once you have that intention.PATIENCE Patience in relating with others who are going through midlife crisis?If you ask her how come the special meal today rather than just signing the papers which end your special relationship forever--learn how to deal with the solutions

But they are marrying, heck they don't even sleep together in the marriage in the relationship turns bad.Last but not all, be affectionate and warm towards your spouse is actually right.Save marriage counseling is truly one of the counselor.You can only go on special trips with her husband, a firefighter, throw parties and charitable giving are pared, if not treated properly.The couples should be noted that committing adultery is definitely just simply proves that you have caused an argument, you tend to be taken out of this misconception is what psychologists and family members for assistance when they come along.