#isn't she just sexy

[manglam-marfach]

dyke!Chilaios has me understanding breeding kink all of a sudden

[irregularcollapse]

i am (a bit against my will, but in a friendly way) reading a hetero romance book by a currently-popular author, and i need a male-attracted woman to clear something up for me please

is this a sexy thing to say? does this sound sexy to you? like imagining a man saying this out loud, you wouldn't think it was. unappealing and lacklustre? a bit lame? sort of cringeworthy?

[timoothy]

Working Boys Billted cut <3

[saccharinescorpion]

hey DENA, you know that thing that you do where you make a ship between two Pokémon characters that seems really random but then you realize it’s perfect, here’s a freebie:

[vegaseatsass]

Pick your fave of my faves!

Challenge: make a poll with five of your all time favourite characters, and then tag five people to do the same. See which character is everyone’s favourite. (ty @ameliarating!) I was so excited to do this meme but I have so many favorite characters from so many different types of media so... because the BL bracket's "most unhinged" polls lit up my brain let's just do 5 favorite balls to the wall characters. (Absolutely do vote for your favorites, though, not who you think the most OTT is or anything. Trying to give Mishil and Ming a fighting chance)

No Vegas because I wish to sidestep the KPTS bias in polls, but I absolutely long to see him and Xie'er swap tactics and become atticwifing-their-dad besties. Tagging @turtlesocksv2 @toomoonfic @lugarn @returning-spring and @timetoboldlygo!

[notasapleasure]

"well of course I said you had to translate the lesbian-adjacent sexy middle aged woman book, it should be no one else but you!" - my Geo teacher, paying me the closest thing to a compliment since she said in exasperation that I was არაჩვეულებრივი.

[variousqueerthings]

I note that I don't, and I never, was much of a fan of doctor-and-rose as romance, but that I -- rather than get annoyed at the romantic-coded scenes -- had a tendency to simply read them from a totally different perspective, and really maybe should have been a sign of sooomething different about me, that I continuously felt that the doctor's concepts of connection must be so alien, that to call it romance would be to diminish the actual Thing that they had, which was presented as such onscreen (to my mind then, now I realise what was happening, but I prefer what I had going on), which is basically that the doctor was a shell of a person, hurtling towards destruction (he would have died without rose in ep1), desperately lonely and sad and traumatised, and she retaught nine -- and by extension ten -- how to love the universe, at the same time as nine and ten taught her the same. (I think about the scene in father's day, where while they're arguing, rose says that she knows how sad he is, and he'll just hang around the tardis waiting for her -- she knew!)

and then on top of that with sarah-jane (which, I never watched the classics as a kid, so I didn't have that context for her beyond what the episode presented) it felt like that was sort of confirmed and made even more canon through this idea that the doctor is constantly mourning the inevitable deaths of their companions and would rather simply leave them behind at some point than watch that happen (and they've seen that happen before, although dying for a cause versus just... dying, because you die, while they don't, they just continue on and on, always seeking connection, always knowing that time will take them away, that's a whole other thing)

and then of course there's ten's... I would call it "sex appeal" because it's david tennant and with his performance there's immediately a bit of a focus on oh he's quite pretty and he faints/is knocked unconscious in both of his first episodes, and a lot more flirting, and the people want to see sparks or what have you... but the doctor as portrayed and written is still... not coming at it that way. yes yes girl in the fireplace but also, once again, doesn't work for me, because I find it soooo much more interesting that the doctor would imprint on A Life - and a life that they admire -- and speedrun the exact thing that they're most afraid of with their companions... that she ages and dies and it's the one thing that the doctor simply cannot stop

meanwhile rose is quite young and swept up in this whole massive adventure and very much reads the doctor not as an alien (frequently surprised by their alien-ness) and gets jealous of sarah-jane as if she's an ex, and renette as if she's... a replacement? but really it's more that the doctor met her at the point when she was about to accept her life as it was. not an exciting life, not a bad life, but always having to ignore the idea that there must be more to it than this. and the idea that she might be unceremoniously dumped back in that after seeing just how This the this could be, of course that's terrifying. and of course she's simultaneously taken with the dashing doctor and the jetset life, and worried she could be replaced, because to her the doctor saved her at 19 years old. in some ways the doctor created her (considering who she becomes after dooms day)

contrasted to martha who initially has a similar kind of experience, but the doctor doesn't meet her at the space she's in with them -- ten is leaning on her, like they did with rose, but not giving anything back unless kicking and screaming and traumatising her whole family. martha's trajectory is so so tragic, because she barely gets a taste of the splendor versus the horrors and the latter marks her for life. but she also knows to walk away from those overwhelming feelings, rather than give into them, she knows they'll never be rewarded and she also grows beyond wanting to be a crutch for the doctor (the fact that she then ends up as a soldier, well... ouch)

and then of course donna, who never has those fucking awe-feelings to begin with and whose connection with the doctor is explicitly de-romanticised but never placed on a lesser pedestal as if there's a hierarchy of alloromanticism. topples those pillars, never sees the doctor as anything but what the doctor is. good old donna. (sobs.) (but also... cautious hope for the specials.) (but also sobs.)

my point being. just don't buy alloromantic doctor, they're a near-immortal alien. it's such a dull simplistic way of reading their relationships to other beings. other point being. all those women who were making heart-eyes at ten, wish they'd met thirteen and had a... "yeah, this still works for me," moment. their horizons, too, are broadened by seeing More. (that or they realise they were never actually "in love" but just thought ten was a sexy skinny little snack and it blinded them.) (although jodie whittaker, too, is a snack.)

and lastly lastly ofc, is that if the doctor has a longterm (by doctor time measurement) intense relationship with anyone, whatever that might be called, it's the tardis. and that relationship is also so alien it cannot be quantified by human words for concepts

[francesderwent]

I figured it out. actually only the first two seasons of Greys are good.

[thedreadvampy]

so me and Sam FINALLY watched the last season of Capaldi's Who

and tell me how, after literally over a decade and for perhaps the first time in his fucking career, Steven Moffat wrote a not just tolerable but really actually good two-parter and fully stuck the landing. like the editing and pacing were still a bit off but the storyline was original, fun, interesting and emotionally invested, and most importantly, rather than ending on a damp fart or the most furious autofellatio in history, the final part didn't fumble it and ended in a way that felt emotionally satisfying and like it made sense for the characters. like the last time he successfully wrapped up a multiparter in a way that didn't feel cheap and hollowly disappointing to me was literally The Empty Child/The Doctor Dances, and a) that was in 2005 and b) tbh The Doctor Dances is about a tenth as compelling and memorable as The Empty Child.

so after 12 years of either hackery or great ideas that fall apart in the second act, Steven Moffat writes what I would genuinely consider to be a memorable Good Doctor Who serial. it ends with bittersweet pathos, a solid closer for all the main characters, and sends Moffat's showrunning career out on a genuine high despite failing ratings and budget cuts (and the fact Doctor Who hasn't been consistently good since about 2009). good job Steve. with grudging respect I admit you pulled it out of the bag on this one.

wait what's this there's one more episode left? and it stars Mark Gatiss? and you literally spend the whole episode inexplicably just shitting all over the legacy of Doctor Who by inventing a version of the First Doctor that bears literally no resemblance to the character that William Hartnell actually played, just so you can spend the whole episode saying misogynistic things to run yourself off to how much more Totally Feminist your version was than the version you made up in your head of what Doctor Who was like in the 60s? and it added literally nothing to the season except to take all the wind out of the sails of the actually good finale you already wrote?

even when he writes a good episode this fucker still finds ways to disappoint me.

[moongothic]

Hey anon, I'm so sorry but your ask is obscenely long so I'm cutting it down to bare essentials

Most of the Original Ask was just a copypaste of this forum post, quickly highlighting this comment too

LOOK WHAT IT SAYS ABOUT MORIA, YO! "Defeated by Gellard and returns in the Final Scenario with an even more grotesque appearance than when you first met him."

But yes, I am aware, I have read that exact same thread before (when I first learned about the Romancing SaGa inspo on r/OnePiece and wanted to learn more), and I did briefly discuss the Seven Heroes when speculating about Cross Guild and wherever the fuck that plotline is going

And I'm now going to add onto that original post, because boy howdy do I have some additional thoughts to get out of my brain

Okay so yes, Doflamingo would be the OG Iteration of Bokuohn, the puppeteer who manipulates people. But in the context of Cross Guild... That's Buggy. "Bokuohn is in control of the majority of the Seven Heroes' forces. Situated in the Steppes region, he owns a large landship, complete with an innumerable amount of slaves." That's literally just Buggy. Like he's not a master of psychological manipulation nor can he forcefully manipulate anybody like literal puppets either (the way Mingo could), but. Like scratch out he RoSa2 terms, replace them with the relevant OP terms and it's a perfect description of Buggy.

Bringing that up because I'm still interested in Cross Guild becoming Shichibukai 2.0 But Without The Government This Time, but if we wanted to have exactly seven former Shichibukai to make up Cross Guild and make sure we had like ones who could actually fill out the roles of the Seven Heroes from RoSa2... Yeah there's going to have to be some replacements Not just because otherwise Doflamingo would need to be broken out of Impel Down somehow (which I doubt will happen, also I don't think Crocodile would want him working for him anyways), but also. Jinbei's with the Strawhats. And I don't think he's ditching Luffy any time soon for Crocodile of all people, not when he finally fucking joined the Strawhats for realsies.

So Doflamingo could be replaced with Buggy, cool, sure. What about Jinbei then? Who will take up the role of RoSa2's Subier?

So a while back I wrote this speculation post about if the Burn Scar Man (who has the final Road Poneglyph) could be a Fishman.(PERHAPS specifically Davy Jones?) Bringing that up because during Kuma's flashback we did learn that Kuma got the Shichibukai Slot after Ace defeated one of the seven at the time. And we specifically got to see Ace talk to Jinbei about it, Ace being surprised Jinbei of all people was glad the Shichibukai slot was being filled again. Now obviously, our Firefist Ace defeating a Shichibukai makes for one great candidate on who the Burn Scar Man could be, as Ace could very easily leave someone with some severe burn scars. This is platantly obvious lmao. But it's the conversation with Jinbei that actually interests me, because like. Sure, Jinbei being a fellow Shichibukai, it might be odd for Ace to hear Jinbei be glad that one of his fellow Warlords is being replaced. But that comment could make twice as much sense if that Warlord had ALSO been a fellow Fishman and/or a Merman (and perhaps someone Jinbei might've known better?). Now indeed. We are going to meet the Burn Scar Man eventually, 100%, it's mandatory for the plot to move forwards. Which means we're going to find out who that guy is, and if the Road Poneglyph gets stolen from him, he might have to find something else to do with his life since there won't be any point in guarding it anymore. And hey. If Mr Burns does turn out to be a fellow former Shichibukai who also happens to be a Fishman/Merman and a master of Fishman Karate... Oh hey, what's this? "Subier - A half octopus merman who controls the flow of the ocean to use as a weapon." Like. IDK I think we could have another Cross Guild member on our hands here.

(Honestly, currently the only problem we have is Dantarg, whose role currently being held by Kuma. Like the only other known Shichibukai we have who could be "available" is Law but he hasn't really done any "bodymods to become stronger" and thus doesn't fit the description. Hell, that description fits Kid more than anything but he was never a Shichibukai either. Guess we gotta keep on hoping Kuma somehow survives and just doesn't return to the Revolutionary Army for some reason)

Hilariously the most interesting thing you pointed out was that comment in the forum thread about Moria, 'cause I hadn't even realized this before but

So we know Blackbeard had captured Moria and held him hostage for... weeks, months? Until he was freed by Coby as per Perona's plea during the raid on Fullalead. Interestingly though, although theoretically we know Moria and Perona should have escaped the island by now, we have not seen either, now have we? Which is kind of suspicious now that I think about it. Because like. It'd make perfect sense if Blackbeard and co had been torturing Moria during his time in captivity, right. Have they been feeding my beloved goth onion well? Realistically, probably not?

Like. Thinking about it. We know Moria got chumby after the trauma of losing his crew and all, so what are the odds he might have lost that weight now during his captivity??? What if he looks more like his younger self again, the one see clash with Kaidou??? Or, the more horrifying option. I mean zombies aren't like an inherent part of Moria's DF abilities, just the Shadow Manipulation. But for all we know Moria could have lost a limb or two, and depending on where the fuck Hogback is (dude is supposed to be a competent doctor, he should be able to stitch Moria back up)... I mean theoretically the next time we see Moria he could look like one of his zombies. Or worse.

[fair-fae]

whomp whomp

Ngl I get the need to be cognizant about characters that are technically "adults" but are purposely infantilized while also fetishized to look like/evoke thoughts about minors, or characters that are minors but are sexualized, especially in media coming out of Japan (though the west definitely has our own problem with sexualizing underaged characters) but like. I hate when people take a character who is obviously an adult and not presented to look like a child in any way and pick apart why they're, I guess, secretly supposed to look like a kid or "minor-coded" or something lol especially in anime-ish styles where most characters look "young" by default. "They're short" "she's flat-chested/has small boobs" "she has a babyface" "she has a high-pitched voice" "they like cute things" "they have a fun and youthful personality" "she doesn't have the most exaggerated hourglass shape in the world" "they're not big and ripped with muscle" "she wears girly clothes" Like, cool! You just described me. A real life fully grown, 30yo adult woman with sexual agency. Guess I shouldn't exist. Guess anyone who has ever found me attractive is a pedophile. Like what the fuck lol. (Bonus points for a new one I recently heard: "she has pigtails." Ah, yes! Women already get harassed IRL for wearing their hair in what should be an innocuous really basic hairstyle they might think is cute. But let's sexualize and infantilize it further! You're really a champion of the women and children.)

[see-arcane]

I might have pitied this deformed woman

With all due respect ACD why is everyone calling someone with a limp deformed... Also to be honest I would have felt more horror from the story if Gilroy found her attractive and/or charming and enjoyed her company and work relationship but also did not love her for whatever (non-physical) reason, because then there could have been a potential inner conflict and guilt, instead of ''this is out of my hands she is icky-looking and a crone (Gilroy you are 35) so I have no self-doubts about being in love involved on top of it all yay''. Having him vehemently dislike her all the time minus during hypnosis removes those layers.

It isn't 'everyone' in the story who calls her deformed, though. It's just Gilroy. No one else is mentioned deriding her for her disability or her looks or anything else beyond Penelosa's talent.

Considering ACD's comparatively progressive track record with the Sherlock Holmes stories--a series notable for how often it takes the side of oppressed parties, including abused or preyed-upon women--I can't see Gilroy's ageist and ableist views as anything but an intentional setup for the narrative payoff of his disgust as well as his anger and fear.

The story does feel slightly karmic at the start and, to give ACD the benefit of the doubt, I agree with you that having Penelosa not be an attractive hypno-dominatrix likely played a part in Gilroy's initial revulsion at her controlling him into playing paramour. I think this was intentional for the character's buildup, but also for the audience's. Even in the present day, there's no ignoring that there are demographics out there who are Highly Interested in the erotic implications of hypnosis. BDSM for the brain, puppet master kinks, et cetera.

If Miss Penelosa had been hot, or even just pretty, I wouldn't have been surprised if the horror story ACD was trying to put together would lose much of its punch in his era's audience. Sure, it's still icky that Gilroy's a man being Controlled By a Woman (!!!), but having her be attractive would 'soften' it for them. Still, all this is only in play if ACD was really truly adamant about selling the horror of 'A Stranger Now Owns My Free Will and Is Planning to Violate My Life in Intimate Ways.'

It could also have just been intended as an eerie scientific*** what-if adventure applied to a then-popular (and wildly overestimated) practice of the time. Or maybe he meant it as a straight-up supernatural escapade in the vein of vampiric mesmerism from a psychic monster. I don't know, I can't ask him.

All of that said, the horror is soured a bit by Gilroy being a haughty skeptic snob who had some comeuppance heading his way in the first place. Similar setups are common in horror flicks today, where we get to cheer at least once in a movie when the Big Villain takes down a more commonplace bad guy. There's no scare there, just vindication.

And me being me, that's not enough. Because I am all about two things.

One, adding more horror to everything, always, forever.

Two, making life harder for Jonathan Harker.

Jonathan 'Holiest Love means I Will Walk Backwards into Hell to Protect/Stay with My Wife Whether She's Mortal or a Literal Monster' Harker is not about to shit on anyone for a bad leg or some crow's feet.

More importantly, we've already seen his reaction to sexy sexy undead ladies trying to hypnotize him into compliance so they can take certain bloody/eternally conscripting liberties with him.

To judge by the 1000+ Dracula adaptations that show the directors' fetishes in full view, Jonathan being preyed on by the hot vampire Brides is seen by many people as...you know. Hot. Enough to rewrite and bastardize his character every time to make him seem like he was genuinely tempted by them.

But He Was Not.

He was being hypnotized into artificial attraction and paralysis so the ladies could take their turns with him without his fighting back or trying to run. Which he does later! More than once! Every time this voluptuous trio tries to hypnotize or corner him again, Jonathan catches on and sprints in the other direction. He is not into that shit no matter how pretty you are, ladies.

Specifically because, as I and Bramothy Stoker cannot stress enough, Jonathan Harker is strictly Minasexual. All Mina all the time. 24/7 Mina lockdown 365 days of the year. Mina, Mina, Mina. Mina? Mina. (I personally headcanon him as demisexual with shades of biromanticism and ace, but that's beside the point.)

The point is, even if Penelosa was a knockout, Jonathan wouldn't notice. He wouldn't care. Just as his love would not have been stopped by Mina turning into an actual monster; he would rather be damned and in love than slay her and be holy. You can bet your ass if Mina suddenly had a handicap he'd still be enraptured with her to the point of blasphemy. You know he's going to still be heart-eyed as they grow older. Jonathan Harker is made of unconditional and extremely focused love. It is all-encompassing and yet it belongs to a single person. It's the kind of love we all wish we had for ourselves.

It's the kind of love that someone like Penelosa--who latched onto a random handsome prick of a professor after she had known him LESS THAN AN HOUR and started plotting to groom him into her personal Ken doll--would do anything to have for herself; Jonathan Harker, the true Prince Charming, the gallant beloved, the guileless charmer who holds the One He Loves above himself, above God and Devil and the world itself...being wasted on some pretty young thing who hardly needs such a treasure.

It isn't fair. Mrs. Harker will never appreciate dear Jonathan like other, more deserving women would. Not like her. She would show him. Help him through the motions until he learned better; learned to love in the right direction.

Her direction.

Only if given the opportunity, of course.

(👁)

In short, yeah, Gilroy was not the best option for a sympathetic horror story protagonist who we could feel real fear and empathy for. We only really get a glimpse of that toward the end, when Penelosa escalates enough to start injuring innocents and tries to make Gilroy throw acid in his fiancée's face. A big scary leap, but also too late in the game for a proper punch. Especially with the abrupt copout of the ending. Bleh.

I think we can do better than that. Say, with a protagonist who can balance on the pro-and-con line of keeping the supernatural puppet master of their life happy enough to not act rashly, who knows the value of dancing on eggshells in a tight spot, who could tug the heartstrings of villain and audience just enough to let fuller and far more frightening machinations come to light as time goes by.

Especially with certain other powers lurking in the shadows, which might make a trifle like death a far less permanent end to their ~romance~ than it ought to be.

Don't you agree, Mr. Harker? ❤

P.S. Gilroy's still absolutely getting his ass handed to him in this take, don't you worry. He's been demoted from crush to chew toy to minion. RIP sir, but you're not off the hook just because Jonathan's distracting her with his dreaminess. Get to work.

[colorfuldream]

Since we've calmed down after the last Splatfest, I can finally bitch about some Shiver fans' takes.

My God she did NOT try to "change the subject and try to make Frye comfortable".

Shiver SUCKS. She's greedy, she brags when she wins, she'll say anything she has to to get vote. That's WHY SHE'S FUN! Every member of Deep Cut Kinda Sucks. That is the point!

Big Man does get a little carried away and sometimes gets worked up (though he's still being nice) during the fests announcements. Frye barely even tries to make an argument (her job!) because she's too busy being silly.

None of them give a damn about the results. They're here to party and have fun. Sure, they like to win but they don't care if they lose. Almost every single time, the winner says something along the lines of "all three options are nice though" or "let's do all three!"

Shiver did exactly what she did for the Nessie vs Aliens vs Bigfoot festival: lie her ass off. This time, instead of lying about seeing Nessie, she pretended that her choice was better because she legit doesn't know how to do a fist bump. It's silly! It's endearing! She's a loser! Girlfailure! She doesn't care if it's embarrassing, she came clean because it's no big deal and she won! She won eight fucking times in a row, she gets to brag if she pleases.

It's fine for your fav to not be perfect. You don't need to go out of your way to mischaracterize an entire dialogue because you need to defend her from the "haters". And quite frankly, wouldn't it be worse if she was babying the other members (or singling Frye out) because they didn't win for months? Don't you think it would be condescending? Her lines were implied to be prewritten. None of them have a problem with what they have to say. They might even write them themselves for all we know!

Deep Cut are all good friends. That's why they don't give a single flying into space fuck about who wins, the things said to win, or the things said after they won.

And, finally, ofc it also goes for Frye and Big Man fans. Neither care if they lose. Frye doesn't even try (ie: she had less than 10% of the bite for Team Fame and had no reaction, especially when she could have made great arguments for it since it logically beat the other two teams (sorry for breaking Splatfest law guys, it needed to be said)), Big Man is just happy to be there (though he probably really wanted Love to win... But alas capitalism triumphs all). I'd LOVE it if Nintendo finally wrote them some spicy dialogue instead of the bland and boring "eh gg" we've been getting for over a year. I'd LOVE the acknowledgement that Frye is incredibly unpopular and has gotten brutal loses. They did it in Splat1 and 2. I want my girl to go on a rampage or for Big Man to impose himself. But it's not that big of a deal. We ain't getting angst. Deep Cut is too busy sharing their one braincell to decide what meal they're gonna have to care.

It's not that deep. It doesn't matter in the end. What fucking matter iS TO STOP KILLING YOUR TEAMMATES DURING TRICOLOR WHY THE HELL ARE YOU SHOOTING AT ME WE ARE IN THIS TOGETHER—

[giantkillerjack]

So incredibly pleased to see fans sexualizing not just old men but fat old men!

Something inside me just sings to know that Pat from BBC Ghosts could inspire such a large amount of lovingly crafted pornography on AO3!

As a fat fellow who hopes very much to be a fat old man myself someday, what a gift!!

(Actually, as a short fat white boi with brown hair, I bet could do a pretty easy cosplay! OMG AND MY TALL WIFE COULD BE THE CAPTAIN. OMG. DEAD MUSTACHE HUSBANDS. OMG.)

[moinsbienquekaworu]

I'm sorry I'm going to be insane for a second, avert your eyes

[bunnyhysteria]

there is a dearth of wriosige out there.... need more cougar x her puppy boy toy....