#isaac in denial lol

[himeofshyness]

After SVE 2.0 Update...

Isaac: Look I'm not in love with Farmer. I like them just as much as that next monster I killed.

Lance: .... ಠ◡ಠ

Isaac: I mean, I clearly have feelings for them, but feelings don't mean love.

Jadu: .... ಠಿ_ಠ

Isaac: Do I have feelings for Farmer? Sure! But that doesn't mean that I.... I-! Oh mygawd! I'm inlove with Farmer!

Alesia: .... (눈‸눈)

Isaac: *slams desk* Why didn't you tell me!

Lance: *chuckles* We thought you knew.

Isaac: Wha-! WE!? (●__●)

Camilla: We all knew. We talk about it all the time. (๑¯◡¯๑)

[m00nsbaby]

Glitter & crimson.

Marc Spector x F!Reader.

Next part.

Tags - warnings. College AU, no mentions of Jake/Steven, suggestive but not smut, cheating.

For my Pedrito Pascal / Oscar Isaac girlies I’m so sorry but Joel is indeed based on Joel Miller pre-outbreak lol.

Word count. 2.1k

Summary. "Marc is clever. One word I wouldn't like to use is manipulative, but I wouldn't be lying; he knows exactly when and how to do things.” 

He knows Joel is watching, that one misplaced look and the false confidence he puts in him will be gone, so he carefully chooses his words and makes everyone else believe he would never cross the line with you.

You seemed to be in denial of the obvious, because above all the bad that could be behind that puppy face, there was the fact that he was your best friend, and you loved him, no matter if he was a good or bad person.

A talent he didn't know he had until he met your boyfriend was that of acting. Choosing which mask to wear on each occasion to his advantage.

When Joel was with you, he always kept his distance. After greeting you with a hug, you wouldn't feel Marc's hands on you again until the moment he was about to leave, giving you the most insipid hug he could manage as a way to say ‘goodbye’.

When you were alone, the story was completely different, and both, like two peas in a pod from the first time you exchanged words, spent time together as if you needed each other to breathe.

Though, for Marc, that's exactly how it felt.

The fact that Joel was older than you didn't help. Not so much older that your relationship would be something weird, rather enough for him to have slightly more adult concerns like work and taxes while you were still suffocated by university worries.

You saw each other maybe two or three times a week, but neither of you minded. (Marc didn't mind either; the farther apart he was, the better.)

"The couple of the century." Applause greeted you as both joined the party. You rolled your eyes, knowing they were just teasing, Marc, on the other hand, pretended to bow with one hand while the other rested on your lower back.

Apart from your group of friends, there were at least ten more people, nothing too wild. More like a typical party for young adults, students with enough budget to survive the next two weeks.

"Do you want something to drink?" Amidst the music and noise of the crowd, Marc had to lean in close to whisper in your ear.

His hand never left your body.

"I’ll have whatever you have." You smiled, leaning in enough for him to hear you.

You felt the stares of others fixed on you. Even at this point in your lives, you were not exempt from gossip.

And it seemed that you both were determined to feed the rumors; you, unconsciously, and Marc, enjoying pushing the narrative that you were an adorable couple without a care in the world about a guy in his 30s with a stupid job at a construction company.

When Marc returned with your drink, he sat next to you on the couch, tapped your glass before taking a sip of his, and his free hand rested on your thigh, specifically on the part where your dress didn't cover your skin.

You were used to it. To him. To his hands.

"And when will you make it official?" Someone asked, breaking the moment of intimacy between you both.

"Make what official?"

"Our thing, silly," Marc replied with a teasing smile on his lips.

"But we're not..."

"Soon," he interrupted, this time looking at the girl who had asked, someone from the classroom, one of those who said out loud how much they wanted 'a Marc in their life.'

You rolled your eyes, smiling, and quietly sipped from your glass.

You didn't question it. Little did you know that Marc took every opportunity to make you look like his to the eyes of others.

Gradually, the party started to take shape, you felt more and more crowded among the people, and the volume of the music began to rise until you couldn't continue chatting.

"Let's dance." You nodded immediately as the sofa began to fill up with strangers, and you let Marc pull your hands to get up.

"I can't stand this dress anymore." You said, adjusting the hem of it with your fingers.

"I'll help you take it off later." his lips brushed your ear as the number of people on the impromptu dance floor forced you to bump your bodies together.

"Idiot," you said, laughing, while your hands held his, and your hips began to follow the rhythm of the music slowly.

This was Marc's favorite part, even though he always ended up struggling with his tight pants for reasons beyond his control.

"Is tonight still on?" He whispered when he had you close. You were facing away from him, and your hips continued moving against your best friend's, his hands slowly traveling up and down your waist.

"When have I canceled a sleepover?" You raised your voice, looking over your shoulder at him.

Poor Marc was about to have an orgasm in the middle of his university friends, but could anyone blame him? Your body rubbed against him in that short, tight dress.

He mentally thanked the loud music for silencing his moans every time you moved to the perfect rhythm.

"I-I just wanted to be sure."

"Are you tired?" Your movements slowly stopped as you planted a kiss on his cheek. "You're sweating."

"I'm hot." It came from his throat as if someone were strangling him. He even cleared his throat. "Very."

"Let's have a drink and come back." You gave him a little push to make way for you, and he walked behind you, one hand on your hip as an excuse not to lose you among the crowd.

A sigh of relief escaped both of you when you entered the kitchen, closing the door behind you. There was no one else, and the music felt noticeably quieter.

"What do you want? I'll treat you," you joked as you looked at the grouped bottles of alcohol next to the soft drinks. You grabbed two plastic cups.

"Give me the house specialty."

"Say no more." You served two glasses of mineral water without hesitation. When Marc noticed, he couldn't help but laugh as he held his cup.

With a jump, you climbed onto the counter table, spreading your legs to make room for him. It was as if your body worked automatically when it came to Marc. Like clockwork, he settled between your legs to continue drinking from his glass.

"I can't believe I used to hate mineral water before I met you."

"It's spicy water. How could you hate it?" You tried to stifle a laugh.

He laughed with you. One of those silly laughs where the alcohol in your system speaks for you, and the dream of being with someone you love makes things twice as fun as they really are.

The laughter died down little by little, Marc rested his forehead against yours and kept his eyes closed, along with that silly smile.

"Everyone is talking about us." you whispered after a few seconds of silence.

"You're my fake girlfriend after all." you laughed again.

"You have to stop, you'll get me in trouble with Joel.” Just the mention of his name made Marc's stomach churn. He bit his lower lip to avoid saying what he really thought.

"Oh, really?" He opened his eyes again, moving his head slightly to lightly brush the tip of his nose against yours, making you smile. His fingers pressed against your thighs, and you gasped when he pulled you closer to his body with a single tug. Now you were sitting on the edge of the counter.

"Marc?" You swallowed hard when you noticed his gaze fixed on you. The playful and teasing air had suddenly vanished.

"Uh-huh?" He licked his lips, and your gaze dropped from his eyes to his mouth. You had felt this kind of impulse before, but you always did your best to ignore it. Even before you met Joel.

He noticed the change in your expression and almost smiled triumphantly. After years, you were beginning to let your guard down. Without waste time; his body leaned forward, and suddenly his lips met yours. You had waited so long for this that you almost stole a moan from each other.

Marc's lips were delicious, even though it hurt you to admit it. Beyond the taste of beer and mint, you could feel him in your mouth, and that was so much more intoxicating than every drink he had prepared for you throughout the night. 

It was desperate, as if he wanted to show you just how much he had desired you over the past years. You felt his tongue exploring your mouth, his teeth nibbling your lower lip, and his hands roaming from your waist to your thighs again and again.

His jeans became uncomfortable again when he managed to make you whimper against his mouth. With you on the edge of the counter, it wasn't hard for him to push his hips against you, grazing your thigh in an attempt to find some relief to his growing boner.

For a moment, he considered it might be a dream; it wouldn't be the first time he had this kind of dream about you. But his alarm always managed to bring them back to reality just as he was about to reach the best part.

Just like now.

Oh no, wait, that wasn't his alarm.

It was your ringtone.

Like a bucket of cold water, he had to snap out of it. You pulled away from him, cheeks flushed, breathing ragged, and lips swollen and moist from Marc's hungry kisses.

"It's Joel." Of course, it was him. It was always him.

You didn't even give him a chance to fully react as you hastily escaped from his embrace and left the kitchen. It felt like the walls were closing in on you, and you felt suffocated.

The garden seemed like a better option.

"How's the party going?" Your boyfriend's cheerful voice on the other end of the line made your stomach churn.

As you licked your lips, you could still taste Marc.

"Amazing, love." You looked at the pair of guys lying on the grass, tipsy and probably about to fall asleep.

"Is Marc there with you? Will you both come back together?"

You swallowed hard.

"Yes, I... yes." A few seconds of silence. Joel was used to your chatty version, the one who started conversations in the worst situations.

"Oh..." More silence. "I'm glad, it's safer that way." His tone of voice indicated he was serious. Another blow to the stomach knowing the trust he placed in both of you. "Will I see you on Sunday?"

"Of course, love." You took a deep breath, closing your eyes for a few seconds as if trying to console yourself.

"I won't interrupt you anymore, sugar." As if sweeping away that uncomfortable atmosphere, he returned to his playful and affectionate tone, one that you rarely didn't hear. "I love you, can't wait to see you."

"I love you." You were out of breath. "See you."

You waited in the yard until Marc got tired of your absence. You didn't function well without each other, and in social situations, this was no exception. He came out silently, not asking anything, and you were grateful he didn't.

He placed his red jacket over your shoulders before taking your hand, and you didn't reject him; you never could. You intertwined your fingers together, and it was you who led him to the car.

The car that belonged to both of you, if that made any sense.

The ride back home was silent.

Despite the heaviness in your chest, you couldn't help but let things flow with Marc. Even if you wanted to, you couldn't give him the cold shoulder or ask your body to feel uncomfortable with him.

Both of you prepared to sleep in the usual way. He didn't look back as you took off your dress, and you stood side by side at the sink while brushing your teeth. He did his best to ignore that you were wearing Joel's T-shirt to sleep for days now.

With a gentle push from Marc when it was time to go to bed, you laughed a little and felt a bit more at home with his company.

You followed the routine; he opened his arms to welcome your body, and you snuggled up to him as closely as possible. The way he held you made you sigh with relief.

This was definitely your favorite place. Your home was in Marc Spector's arms.

"I love you, you know that, right?" He whispered in your ear, silently praying that his scent would linger in Joel's stupid shirt.

You nodded slowly, unable to contain your smile.

"I know, Marc." A shiver ran down his spine as he felt your breath on his neck. "I love you too."

If only you said it in the way he wished.

He fell silent when the screen of your phone lit up, partially illuminating the room. He squinted slightly and, as he identified the small heart on the contact name of the text message, he knew who it was from.

Rolling his eyes, he tightened his hold on you, eliciting a playful groan from you. He kissed your hair before snuggling with you, a smile on his face.

Was this going to become a competition? Then so be it.

[beevean]

@hypermascbishounen

Interesting how the concept of the gifted child and the consequences of being favored is at the core of all the major rivalries in CV.

Hugh seethed when his father gave the Hunter Whip to Nathan and not to him, which lead him to feel worthless, and Camilla used that jealousy to corrupt him.

Maxim wanted to become better than Juste, but for the sake of relieving him of his "cursed" fate, so he took it into his own hands... which lead to nothing but disaster. Of course, Evil Maxim implies that he was born also from Maxim's own resentment against Juste and the "wall" that had been erected between them once he got the Vampire Killer. I also find fascinating that the worst ending has Juste technically accomplishing his fate as a hunter, but utterly failing as a friend, cursed by Evil Maxim to hunt for the rest of his life because that's clearly the only thing he's good for.

Isaac was jealous of Hector being Dracula's favorite, but Hector himself hated being Dracula's favorite because it came at the price of his self. This jealousy is what makes him obsessed with Hector and wanting to defeat him, but there is also the irony of the favorite one being the one who threw everything away because being appreciated simply wasn't worth the turmoil, the guilt and the dehumanization.

And at first Albus is framed as being jealous that Shanoa got to be picked for the Dominus ritual over him, but in reality, he wanted to protect her from it - being Barlowe's chosen one meant that she was to be sacrificed. (I see the parallels with Dracula and the Forgemasters so clearly but I can't word...)

HoD as a prequel to RoB/SoTN shows well the cracks that were starting to form in the family. Juste's own theme is not called "Successor of Fate" for nothing. However, Maxim seems to be more concerned than Juste is: and while on the surface it might seem that the latter is not very fleshed out, to me he seems to be rather... hyperfocused at best, and in denial at worst. He wants to get the job done. He has no time for Maxim's doubts: they have to save Lydie. And after Lydie is saved, well, you don't want to trouble her, do you, Maxim? Let's leave all of this behind us :) it's all fine :) we won and now we're happy together :)

(which is why I find the worst ending fascinating, on top of it being utterly depressing. It's the only ending where Juste can't hide his own feelings: not only in the best ending he outright prevents Maxim from telling Lydie what happened, but in the "mid" ending, she convinces him that blaming himself is the same as blaming Maxim, so Juste can put on a mask for her sake. In the worst ending, it's only him, his guilt, and the rest of his life)

I'm not sure if Juste was deliberately meant to evoke Alucard as a character (Juste may look like Alucard 2.0 because that's Kojima's type lol, same with Hector being Masc Alucard), but Alucard himself was meant to echo the Belmont legacy and its issues, with Richter being the symbol of them - as I said, Alucard himself feels pressured to honor Lisa's wish, even if it causes him great pain. But while Richter eventually could not deny that his sense of self-worth is tied to his destiny to fight... Juste still has the chance to hide from what his name entails, and be nothing but the perfect Belmont successor.

[lauriejamesgrace]

i'm currently suffering and sick in bed, so with the release of the new season i've used my time to rewatch all three seasons of heartstopper, and both tao's reaction to nick and charlie in season one, and isaac's reaction to elle and tao in season three have got me thinking about the value i place on my own (platonic) relationships;

does anyone else know what i mean when i say that you can be fully, wholly, entirely in love with someone without any desire to make the relationship sexual or even romantic?? because like

my best friend is the actual LOVE of my whole entire LIFE

(don't worry they know all this this isn't some dramatic love confession i'm keeping from them but regardless,,)

'cause like i've always been someone who greatly values platonic love, but until the past couple years i always thought that romantic love was inherently stronger than platonic?

i'm in one of those stereotypical queer friendships where literally everyone is convinced that we'll either end up together, or are already together, or are at least in an unrequited love situation (either way around lmao it varies), and when i say everyone, i mean everyone, as in like especially my dad? he's convinced we're meant for eachother and that we'll never meet anyone else that gets eachother the the way we do one another, and my mum's convinced that anyone either of us date will undoubtedly have a problem with how close we are, even though it's a well established fact that anyone that has an issue with our friendship will not be a candidate for someone i'd be with, and to top it off they were the first person i 'dated' at the fresh-out-the-womb(or closet sidfjhs) age of 12/13

and because we then broke up it was obviously awkward for a little while, and we weren't as close for two or three years after that, but shared social circles meant that we remained at least partly friends, and then come year 10 (14/15 years old for anyone not british lmao) we became decidedly best friends again, but even then it was just your average, secondary school, best-friendship. my love for them continued to grow across our gcse years and sixth form, but it was across our first year at university (seperate unis!!!!) where i truly fell in love

we'd made jokes about our 'unhealthy closeness', and 'codependence' for a while, but when i say i made a total of zero friends that first year, because i was perfectly happy spending every spare minute on the phone to them, i am being completely serious, and i'm not even mad about it

either way, i'm sick and getting bored of typing so i won't go on about just how much i love them, but i assure you that they are my best friend for life, regardless of who else i meet in my future, and i can't help but refer to it as a platonic relationship rather than 'just' a friendship, because at the end of the day we are in love! and it'll never be romantic or sexual in any way because that's not what either of us want, but that doesn't diminish the strength or importance of the relationship we're in

(also we have discussed how we probably could fall in [romantic] love without much difficulty if we only tried, but we aren't feeling that way naturally, and we have no desire to change our dynamic as it is now so why would we ?! <3)

anyways where i was meaning to go with this was that part of me has been secretly terrified that i'm just in denial of my 'true' feelings, and that how much i love them can only be justified by a secret desire for romance. i was genuinely so stressed about them (or me for similar reasons) getting into a [romantic] relationship, and me suddenly having a realisation that i'll never truly be happy without being with them like that, but they recently HAVE gotten into a new relationship, and i am pleased to say that i am genuinely nothing but happy for the both of them

sidenote going back to the intro of this post lol: i was also terrified that in the event i'm not in [romantic] love with them that i'd end up acting exactly like tao, or isaac, as in like mad, or bitter, or jealous (not that i think their feelings were invalid, but they still hurt their friends by feeling that way and that ain't what i wanted), but i'm not even feeling jealous so i think i'm acting okay lol

thanks for reading xoxo

[blanche-elizabeth-devereaux]

I'm sorry to annoy you but can you tell me about your Arthur x Molly modern au headcanons?

ah no, of course!!! I love ranting about all my fav ships and headcanons, so you're the one indulging me ♥️ it's kind of a general au rather than separate headcanons lol

background: Dutch owns a mechanic shop that used to be a front for money laundering until they supposedly went straight

Arthur is a mechanic & Molly was the receptionist.

was, because she quit after an argument with Dutch (which resulted in their messy breakup)

her & Arthur got to know each other since he used to spend the few breaks he had sketching in a chair behind her desk bc she was the only one who wouldn't beg to look through his journal

Molly writes poetry and also knits!!

(she might make a scarf for Arthur eventually lol)

they were usually just friendly or civil with each other until one day she happened to see what he was drawing & a convo struck up (them bonding over art is consistent across every universe for me btw 😂)

they realize they have a connection but both refuse to act on it - Molly bc she's in denial & Arthur bc the guilt is too much.

they'd spend so much time talking about everything from art to family - the homes and people they still miss.

after she left, Arthur spends all his break time avoiding everyone in his truck, something Hosea definitely notices

Arthur's truck is his baby btw. he has a smaller, kid safe car that he hates driving & only uses it when he has Isaac on weekends.

SO!! Molly knows nothing about cars. she was only there bc of her relationship with Dutch (something some other employees/gang members were bitter about)

of course it's after she's cut out Dutch that she starts having car troubles and breaks down on the side of the road 👀

she calls the only person at Outlaw Autos she feels comfortable with... Arthur ♥️

and of course Arthur would never leave a lady stranded, so he comes to help in record time.

it's a little awkward at first but soon enough the ice breaks & convo flows again.

Molly admits that the fight was just the catalyst for an inevitable breakup

Arthur casually slips in his she should've ended it a long time ago & that she deserves better.

it doesn't help that Arthur's an attractive man fixing her car & there was already tension between them (he's gone full Hot Grease Monkey)

she invites him out to eat as a thank you for fixing her car

one meal turns into two, then three, then before they know it they need to admit that it's no longer a nice meal between "friends"

I choose to mostly forget that Dutch exists in this au 😂

[icaroid]

are you willing to offer the sacrifice class syllabus to the masses?? or at least a book list?? it's just that the topic is v interesting.

Hi!! I did look up the old syllabus, I'm not going to put it up in its entirety, but here's a list of the readings that we did:

Articles/Excerpts:

Lewis Hyde, The Gift: Creativity and the Artist in the Modern World

Walter Burkert, Homo Necans: The Anthropology of Ancient Greek Sacrificial Ritual and Myth

Jukka Jouhki, "Orientalism and India"

J. van Baal, "Offering, Sacrifice and Gift" in Numen, Vol. 23, Fasc. 3 http://www.jstor.org/stable/3269590

Alan Morinis, "The Ritual Experience: Pain and the Transformation of Consciousness in Ordeals of Initiation" http://www.jstor.org/stable/639985

Lawrence Babb, "The Food of the Gods in Chhattisgarh…" http://www.jstor.org.remote.slc.edu/stable/pdf/3629382.pdf

Sigmund Freud, Totem and Taboo

C. G. Jung, “Transformation Symbolism in the Mass,” in Baum, Mannheim, Campbell et. al., eds., The Mysteries (Papers from the Eranos Yearbooks, vol. 2)

Euripides, The Bacchae (Lattimore translation)

Abraham's "binding of Isaac" Genesis 22:1-19

Sophocles, Oedipus Rex https://records.viu.ca/~johnstoi/sophocles/oedipustheking.htm

Nathaniel Hawthorne, The Scarlet Letter. http://www.planetpublish.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/11The_Scarlet_Letter_T.pdf

Victor Rosner, "Fire-Walking the Tribal Way" in Anthropos http://www.jstor.org/stable/40458234

Jean Varenne, Yoga and the Hindu Tradition.

Yael Bentor, "Interiorized Fire Rituals in India and in Tibet" in JAOS http://www.jstor.org/stable/606619

Sati: A Review Article by Werner Menski, Bulletin of the School of Oriental and African Studies, Univ.of London, Vol. 61, No. 1 (1998), pp. 74-81. http://www.jstor.org/stable/3107292

Wendy Doniger and Howard Eilberg-Schwartz, ed., Off With Her Head!: The Denial of Women's Identity in Myth, Religion, and Culture.

Joseph S. Alter, Gandhi's Body: Sex, Diet, and the Politics of Nationalism

Mohandas Gandhi, My Experiments with Truth: Autobiography. http://www.columbia.edu/itc/mealac/pritchett/00litlinks/gandhi/index.html

War poems of Wilfred Owen—see " The Parable of the Young Man and the Old" and "Strange Meeting" http://www.rjgeib.com/thoughts/abraham/abraham.html

Shirley Jackson, "The Lottery"

Kevin Rushby, Children of Kali: Through India in Search of Bandits, the Thug Cult, and the British Raj

Books:

Henri Hubert and Marcel Mauss, Sacrifice: Its Nature and Functions

Rene Girard, Violence and the Sacred

C. Marvin and D. Ingle, ed., Blood Sacrifice & The Nation

Sakuntala Narasimhan, Sati - Widow Burning in India

there's a focus on India bc that was the professor's area of expertise! hope this is helpful (its gonna b helpful for me in my writing abt jellowpackets lol)

[cbsghostsmetasandtrevor]

Episode 3x6 Live Reaction / Thoughts

AHHHH it's Trevor's Episode and I was SO worried I was going to miss it live. And then be spoiled because people don't use the spoiler tag.

but I'm here, baby!

OOOOh, Snow! So we're looking at like January?

DINOS!!! Isaac doesn't know they're real.

Love Sass.

AW HOW DID Trevor not know about this??

I'm sad that Jeremy isn't a twin. But awww, Jeremy wanted to believe he wasn't gone. Also, why bring up the memorial? I guess it makes sense. I do like the idea that he WASN"T Ready to say goodbye yet.

Oh, Carol... caves? Flirting? What is this????

Aw, Sass/Thor supporting Pete. LOUD MUSIC????

Sass - NOT WATCHING THEM PLAY HIDE THE ARROW.

LOL Sass/Hetty winning and funny.

That's WEIRD! Trevor's in denial.

Awwww, Jeremy got fired. Trevor is so confused. Jay let him down.

Trevor's like - you two are not helping.

Carol trying to get Pete to cave. OMG. SUCKING FINGERS.

Trevor just following J-dog around. OMG YOUNG TREVOR. That was NOT a great casting choice. T-Money BEFORE college.

OMG BAD JEREMY.

Trevor's just excited to see his brother so he doesn't even feel bad for Sam/Jay - > TBF he has earned them a lot of money recently.

It's interesting that Hetty's around a bit despite saying "oh no there's another one" at the start.

Awww Trevor's like "keep him." All he wants is to see his brother.

Isaac's excitement about the meterior. Hetty's story about the rats.

Awwww Trevor. :(

LMAO at Sass/Thor at Pete's WE'RE BACK TOGETHER.

Isaac with the Dino book. So silly.

Trying to smoke him out. Trevor's excited! AHHHHH Trevor's face at Hetty. That was great!

LOL at Jeremy being the world record holder. Trevor's excitement at this! He's just so happy. Honestly, poor Trevor - no one's being supportive of his want to get to know his brother - AND he hasn't even done that thing that the other ghosts have done - focusing Sam to be weird with questions.

Also Jdog didn't find it weird that Sam looked up at Sass?

NO you can't use the ghosts to cheat! I will be very upset if they do it. They should be loyal to Trevor here!

Also, Carol trying to get with Thor! OMG.

Loyalty test!

LOL THOR.

I hate Hetty and Isaac and Sam and Jay cheating with the game.

LOL at Isaac's plot and fail.

OMG Pete is in such denial. THOR SLEPT WITH CAROL???

"Nothing wrong with enjoying your job."

YAY! PETE YELLING AND STANDING UP FOR HIMSELF. PUNCHING THOR!!!

LOL - at Hetty getting into it.

Awww, Jeremy got fired for not taking over the company. Because he thinks he was just being nice.

Awwww, this Trevor being like so supportive. And giving the play away.

Isaac being like WHY NOT HELP???

OMG TREVOR Giving him a wet willy!!! And Sam says "Thanks Trevor" and claiming she calls Jay that! OMG.

see if Jay had followed up at the beginning then they wouldn't have had to deal with the stress of someone trying to stay forever.

"Heaven on Earth" -> commercial. "Sucks for ghosts in purgatory."

Pete's afraid! Thor APOLOGIZE! He likes the physical violence.

AWWWWW Trevor is still supportive. LOL Jeremy not being understanding.

LOL Isaac and stupid dinos and everyone walking away in different directions.

OKAY OKAY> WHY WAS JEREMY NOT WONDERING WTF HAPPENED with the wet willy??? Why was there no back and forth with Trevor having Sam ask questions??? WHY didn't Jeremy get to know something!!!!

I do like the episode but I think there was so many possibilities.

[hornmaster3000]

I'd do anything for you, for you(it's always for you and never for me)

Isaac sighed, shutting the door behind him. She glanced over at Oscar, who had whirled around and was now staring at the freckled teen.

"So, what were you planning to tell me?" Oscar smiled at the ginger, almost as if he were threatening to make his heart melt. Isaac gulped, running his fingers through his curly red hair.

"Uhm, you were gonna tell me something too right? Maybe you should start first?" He tried to ignore the nervousness that was pretty obvious in his tone, hoping Oscar wouldn't notice.(Although not noticing seemed near impossible, atleast in Isaac's opinion.)

"You sure?" Oscar asked him, his face lighting up so much you would've thought he was sparkling.

"Yeah." Isaac reassured him.

"Well then- you might have to sit down for this." Oscar plopped down onto his bed, patting the spot next to him. Isaac quickly sat next to Oscar, looking for any signs of uneasiness on the chubby boy's face. He found none.

"You know how me and Raj have been... pretty close lately, right?" Oh god. Oh no. Isaac bit his lip, slowly understanding where this was gonna lead, but still staying in denial.

"He kind of, told me he liked me the last time we hung out while you were grounded? So I guess we're like, a thing now. Sorry for not telling you any sooner, I was just waiting for the right opportunity." As Oscar finished, Isaac felt his heartbeat pick up along with him. Oh. It felt as if time had stopped, and Isaac was all alone. He felt jealousy and anger sprouting in the pit of his stomach, slowly making its way up. Isaac felt cruel, being jealous of Raj- who was one of his best friends. But he couldn't help it, could he? He had been in love with Oscar for the longest time, and he was(n't) sure Raj's crush on him didn't date back as far. He felt as if Raj had purposely stole Oscar from them, even though he hadn't told him that he was in love with Oscar.

"Uhm, are you okay?" Isaac must've had a devastated look on his face, so much that it concerned Oscar. The freckled teen's lips parted, ready to reply, but nothing came out of his mouth. He curled his hand into a fist, digging his finger nails into his palm. You should be happy for them, a voice inside her head told him. They're your friends. Isaac hated that it was right. He wanted nothing more than to break down right then and there, even though he had no reason to.

"Isaac?-" A hand placed on his shoulder, pulling the shorter teen away from his thoughts. Her eyes met Oscar's, seeing the worry in them. They wanted nothing more than to dip his hands into the softness of Oscar's hair, to carress and ruffle it till it became messy. Just the thought of it alone made Isaac's cheeks turn a soft shade of pink that was visible from the outside due to his pale complexion.

"You never told me what you were gonna say."

Isaac blinked. "Huh?" He tried not to notice the way Oscar rubbed his shoulder soothingly, as if he knew something was wrong. "Oh- I forgot." Was all he could say.

☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆☆ ★ ✮ ★ ☆☆ ★ ✮ ★

Here's a short Istock drabble I wrote based off of a prompt I found on tiktok!! This might suck a little because I haven't written in a while and I wouldnt be suprised if my skills became rusty over time, but I hope you enjoyed it nontheless!! Lets just pray the characters werent too ooc lol

[thedivinevera]

HEY ! HEY ! HEY ! Why don’t we give Isaac from ZsakuVa some attention… like to hear how he develop feeling for the listener against his will… watching them over the cameras … studying them … smiling at them when they had there back to him … small gifts like a book or chocolate … fighting his feelings just to notice it’s so late …. and being overprotective when guests came PLS PLS PLSSS

Fucking right babe, that man gives a lot of protective and obsession vibe than everything, Isaac experience lost many times, from the dead of his parents to the dead of his friend, so it's just natural that he never want to loose you. You become too close, to nice, to sweet, to seductive to his liking at it messed up his entire moral code.

The first symptoms of obsession is just a simple morning, hello, how are you until it turns to "where are you going", "don't leave, it's to dangerous", "stay with me it would more safer" and finally blossom to stalking and watching you behind the hidden camera. He of course would deny it, his in the stage of denial, thinking that this is normal (no it's not) "its just for their safety, they trust me and its my job to protect them" that's what he said but in reality it's start of a flare of real obsession

Second symptoms is the gift giving. It's normal at first, little trinket there and here because you've been a good, until he become addicted to your smile that he would give you random gifts just to see your smile, the reason this is second is because it becoming more visible, and you've becoming aware of the action and weird affection you're getting to your boss

And the last and crazy of all is the feral action from him, like his some sort of territorial wolf that would attack anyone who would hurt their mate, the difference is no is attacking you and you're not even his mate... Last time a man flirt to you jokingly, asking Isaac to give you to him which in Isaac reply to his joke is a full strength, hard punch that turn this poor man's nose into a flat coin. You need to apologize to the man many time and treat his injury which make Isasc jealous it become worse when you give him cold treatment, too scared because of his feral action which makes Isaac beg you to forgive him

And for the grand finale the realization, man... It really takes a flat nose just for him to realize that his completely in-love and obsessed with you, he's now becoming more clingy and romantic which makes you feel the ick because wtf, why your cold boss just suddenly turn into a dog, asking for your attention and approval

But of course it doesn't mean it's always this confusing and scary sometimes it's adorable and cute like just what I said, he act like a dog. He would always call your name and show you so project of his, remember the time he said that he likes literature, yeah he would make you read tons of research, poem and wait for approval, if he has a tail it will definitely wiggle. He would also want to be with you at first it's all just presence bit now he wants to touch and hug you and it will definitely become worse once you admit that you like him to. He's is a silly man:))

(hellyy sorry for late reply, I'm honestly not really a Isaac man, I have a one side rival with him because you cannot convince me that this man already move on about his ex (Andrew Marston) and as an Andrew fan and simp, this is not good..... But maybe I'm just delulu, so again sorry for being inactive from zsakuva fandom lol)

[draganwhorror]

3, 8, 27, 55, 74, and 95!

3. If you could have one superpower, what would it be? Teleportation. I love traveling and going to different places, but sometimes I swear it's so expensive just for the sake of being expensive. Being able to just teleport where I wanted to go would be awesome.

8. What are your current goals? Uh, to not die anytime soon? haha. No, but seriously, I think right now, my current goals are to get my passport renewed and update my WIPs on A03. Nothing too exciting, but considering I'm a slacker and procrastinate a lot, those are lofty goals for me. lol

27. What was the last book/movie that really impressed you? Hmm... the last movie I was impressed with that I can think of off the top of my head was probably Eddie Presley. I know I'm probably biased because it's a movie with Ted in it, but honestly, after I finished it, I couldn't stop thinking about it. Especially the ending. It got really heavy and emotional there, and it just kinda hit harder than I expected it to. It may have been slow to start, but it impressed me more than I thought it would. As for a book, that's a bit tougher. I think I'd have to go with... Hell Spring by Isaac Thorne. It's a horror novel set in rural Tennessee in 1955. At first, I found it a bit too weird and confusing, and I didn't think it was going to be a book I could finish. But after I got through the beginning and into the meat of the story, I was hooked. It's not a book for the easily offended or triggered. There are themes involving self-mutilation, questioning religion, domestic violence, hints of racism, and a character in denial over his sexuality. It's not an easy read, but it is a good read. There are some interesting elements to the story as well. Like the manipulation of time. I don't want to say anything to spoil things, though. That's the last book I read that I think actually impressed me with how good it was.

55. What is your favorite flower? Easy! I love sunflowers and daisies! I'm a simple girl. haha

74. Favorite candy? I'm a sucker for chocolate. But I think my favorite candy is Reese's Peanut Butter Cups. If we're talking non-chocolate, my favorite is probably... Swedish Fish. Or those vanilla flavored Tootsie Rolls.

95. Share your favorite quote. Uh... I've always been fond of the quote, "Don't dream it, be it."

[infiniteorangethethird]

hi i decided i want to come into your ask box

idk what to ask though

oooh you've watched heartstopper now, right? how did you feel about isaac's arc? because i think it was done really well, if a little sped run (but that's fine, this is a series, everything is a little sped run) especially compared to loveless (obviously not the same thing just the same type of rep from the same person and i doubt georgia's story will be adaptated so i like the wonder about the similarities and the differences between the two characters) but loveless was a bit of a trainwreck. well her coming to terms with what's going on with her. but like, fair and also it's probably one of the best things about the book. denial is very relatable lol

i miss loveless :c one of my (ex-?) friends borrowed it but i don't think she wants to read it anymore but i don't want to meet up with her that much anymore but i want the book back but i am too much of a coward to ask about it (i will i swear i just need to ready myself i guess)

have you read radio-silence? i bought it like a week ago but i haven't started (because i also bought the new version of i fell in love with hope and i was fangirling about that).

anyway how are you doing? any stargazing that happened in the past two weeks?

hi hi hellooo bestie I'm doing fine all things considered thank you for asking! Sadly I haven't done any stargazing, without friends to joke around with there's a not insignificant chance of me just straight up falling asleep out on the fields which. Not exactly optimal 😂

so uh funny story I haven't actually watched heartstopper s2 yet (don't even ask how I managed to let it get this far) but if all goes according to plan I'm gonna fix that problem today! I'm really looking forward to that Isaac arc tho & will return with opinions afterwards (you cannot escape me hehe)

I actually read all (I think?) Oseman books so yes, Radio Silence too! It's been a hot minute since then tho so ngl I don't remember much of it, I really gotta reread it and all the others as well heh. I do remember it was overall a good read, definitely would recommend! (Also I just skimmed I Fell in Love with Hope's summary and man color me intrigued 👀)

anyway what about you, how you doin' these fine kinda rainy summer days? found some interesting new constellations recently?

(ps if you need some butt-kicking to get your book back, you know you can count on my (sadly only virtual) support <3 good luck facing your ex? friend regardless I know you got this <3 <3)

[beevean]

Oh, I love everything about this <3 I always joke that Dracula doesn't like Isaac that much because 1) he looks too much like Walter for his tastes lol and 2) he doesn't care for sycopants... but him subconsciously seeing his Mathias self in him and rejecting him as hard as he rejected his human self? Brilliant <3

Now, of course in canon it's not like Dracula outright disrespects Isaac, he's fairly civil towards him and he's still a formidable Devil Forgemaster. But yeah, Drac very clearly gravitates towards Hector more :) Hector is talented, even more than the actual sorcerer :) Hector is always efficient :) Hector is, in a meta sense, Dracula's good counterpart :) Hector is his protégé :) Hector is very pretty and everyone crushes on him--

Speaking of which!

(yea Hector didn't came out unscathed from his Lord's appreciation)

What do you mean by this, specifically? Are you going for "being a golden child is also being vicitm of abuse"? Maybe Hector got crushed under the pressure of not only going against his morals, but also the expectations of being perfect in a way Isaac, the perpetual inferior one, didn't have to deal with? or are you implying something else <3

And oh yeah, the MF manga barely touches on this and the PtR doesn't explicitly, but how much of a hit to the heart was for Dracula to see both son and son figure/protégé leave his insane ass behind for the same reason? That would have been a great moment to think "welp, I'm clearly doing something wrong here". But no :) he's still the same emotional, hypocritical, deep-in-denial Mathias Cronqvist :)

I am thinking about... Dracula and his biases regarding his opinions on his two forgemasters

This is mostly just me and myheadcanons but: Dracula seeing traits of his former life in his two apprentices. Hector is the perfect extra competent man, cold and in control of himself, the person he wanted to be and thought of himself to be. Meanwhile Isaac is someone who's smart and hardworking but dramatic and keeps getting dragged around by his too strong emotions. And that last part does not bother Dracula bc he never lost control of his emotions as a human w his intelligence making it it worse, he did not dishonored the two people he loved the most and did not coldly planned the murder of an innocent kind woman who just wanted to help him, he did not created his nemesis in the VK and the Belmont clan, and he definitely did not cursed his own being and soul for eternity. Besides, he is a perfectly controlled and reasonal vampire lord now and not a simple animalistic human, he's beyond those things now.

So basically Hector, aside from being a special little guy and looking like his hot ex, reminds him of the traits he favored of his human self, while Isaac reminds him of the traits he disliked. And Dracula, an expert in denial and carefully crafted self delusions, probably doesn't realizes this, but at least on a subconcious level he isn't happy with Isaac.

And i'm sure he mostly kept this to himself, after all this kid is still excelent at his craft, blindly loyal, and it's always better to have two forgemasters rather than one. The people around him (specially Isaac) would still be able to notice but it's nothing out of the norm.

But after Lisa died and he went mad, he very openly manifests his favoritism to the detriment of both forgemasters (yea Hector didn't came out unscathed from his Lord's appreciation) and it gets worse after Alucard, him and Lisa's child and his number 1 specialest little guy, decides to oppose him. He's on a bad mental state and the last thing he'd want to see is the reminder of his lack of control, of how much yet how little he has changed.

[smellslikemultifandomimagines]

literally begging for an isaac lahey nsfw alphabet 🙏🙏

✦ pairing: isaac lahey (18+) x fem!reader

✦ smut warnings: nsfw alphabet, mentions of kinky sex and rough sex

✦ headcanon

✦ request guidelines✨

✦ 🌻masterlist🌻

✦ smut night masterlist 💦

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

ahh omg isaac is like a human (well half-human lmao) teddy bear

he'd make you feel so safe and comfortable — make you feel like royalty honestly aha

would run you a bath with bubbles

would offer to make you something to eat

perhaps he'd even heal any pain/uncomfortable areas

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

your smile!!

as cheesy as it sounds, isaac loves knowing that you're safe, cosy, enjoying what he's doing to you

your smile and small giggles is generally a sign that everything's okay and it's one of his favourite non-verbal communication

as for him, i think he likes his hands

the way they look when he's fingering you, holding your hands, literally just the way like look on you

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

isaac loves having your legs tremble when you cum — it’s one of the most satisfying things to see

he’d worship and praise you so much while you cum: “good girl, that’s it”, “such a good girl for me”, “you’re doing so well, baby”

there’s nothing more sexier than having you grip onto him while you arch your back too oh my

i don’t think isaac would really care too much about where he’d cum — it’s hot either way lmao

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Sometimes thinking about having sex with you can calm him down — especially during a full moon

Like bitch you’re his anchor, literally anything you do makes him calm and centred

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Imo, Isaac is definitely the kinkiest and is so down to try just about anything (more in other sections listed here lmao)

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

I don’t think position matters very much to him

Isaac is all for trying new ones

Would even watch porn or google images to show you and see if it’s worth trying

Or even those sex positive youtubers that talk a lot about positions

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

I think Isaac is super giggly during sex — doesn’t matter how the sex is, whether it’s more romantic or kinky

Like I’ve mentioned before, he loves seeing you smile and when he can make you laugh, it’s literally the best feeling in the world for him — in any given context mind you aha

Would definitely use humour to lighten the mood if you’re nervous about trying new things and would make you feel so safe while doing so

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

I think Isaac likes to look presentable and would make an effort to groom himself

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Isaac loves expressing his love for you when it’s more of the slow and sensual type of sex

He’s so thankful to be with you, knowing that you’re the best thing that’s ever happened to him

The way that you’re so patient with him and understanding about issues that he might have is something of true importance

He’d be a bit more quiet with the dirty talk though — wouldn’t do it as much and might just keep it to “you feel so good” kind of talk

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He’d do it mainly when you’re on your period and he’s literally so desperate — would never expect you to do anything if you’re not in the mood

Or if you were away and not in town lmao

But I don’t really think he’d do it that often tbh

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Isaac has literally a plethora of kinks

Orgasm play — denial, edging, overstimulation, even those for himself

He’s literally the biggest switch ever omg — like adores the whole power balance thing

Would be up for bondage

Perhaps choking too lol

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

I dont think he has a specific favourite place to fuck you

I think anywhere works lmao — and if it doesn’t, he’ll make it work

But the bedroom is truly one of the best places for kinky sex lmao

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Literally just you can turn him on

Whether you’re gazing at him with such sultry eyes, or you touching him, hugging him, literally anything

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Isaac is always one to treat you and your body with the utmost respect

Anything you’re not willing to try, he’s already putting on his own ‘no’ list

And as kinky as he is, anything that’ll put you in harms way is an absolute no — last thing he wants is for you to get a sex-related injury lmao

He definitely knows your limits and doesn’t do anything to exceed it

Also wouldn’t be into humiliation — sex, for him at least, needs to be a safe space and humiliation just doesn’t do it for him

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Isaac loves the pride of claiming you — of having you tremble and beg him, having you cum for him and him only, and of having you pull his hair and grind against his tongue

He’s truly a master at eating pussy lmao

One of the most exciting sights to see though, is having you on your knees

You love seeing him at your mercy and begging you to cum — honestly, there’s nothing hotter than seeing his head thrown back and hearing his breathy moans and grunts

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

You know it really depends

As much as he loves fast and rough, sometimes hard and slow is better

He loves being able to take his time with you, give you countless orgasms and so when he’s too rough, it can be a bit too much to handle with that

That being said though, Isaac is always up for slow and sensual — sometimes romantic sex is so much hotter than kinky sex lmao

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Isaac can’t help but fuck you at parties, or just before a meeting, let alone before you have to leave for work/college

The way he can just wreck you and leave you wanting more, but obviously in those situations, you can’t

He’s most certainly the type to not be able to keep his hands off you!

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Ooh yes!

Taking risks such as quickies, toys, positions, experimenting is such a big thing for him

He sees sex as a thing to be enjoyed, which ever way possible lmao

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Isaac has quite the impressive stamina

He would literally go for hours, ruining you until you’ve had enough

The first round is always so good and he’d love trying all kinds of positions to see which is the quickest you he can make you cum

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Vibrators / vibrating panties

Handcuffs

Definitely would try a satisfier pro on you

Wouldn’t mind trying a fleshlight for him

Like literally any sex toy you see at a store, he would be up for trying

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Isaac is quite the tease — the way you squirm and beg for him as he leaves you hot, bothered and so desperate for an orgasm is something that’s quite amusing to him

He’d love whispering (or even texting) dirty things to you, especially during Pack meetings

And would find it so cute when you squirm and press your thighs together to relieve some tension

Isaac loves know that the power of his words can get you wet, and he loves being able to smell the arousal off of you

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Isaac is very much the grunting type

Though he’s such a whiny little thing when you’re teasing and edging him

He’d love dirty talk and saying things like “keep going”, “just like that”, “you feel so good on my cock, princess.”

Lots so swearing too haha

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Isaac loves to wind you up and provoke you sometimes

The intense, hot, lustful sex is something that he craves for

The way that you ride him so aggressively, gripping his so tightly and stretching at his skin

He’d love to spank your ass and grip your hips so hard, it’ll leave bruises

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

isaac is not one to disappoint!

big in girth

pretty average in length lmao

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

not too high, not too low

but he can be pretty needy sometimes — especially in times of intense fighting or planning how to take down the monster so the two of you wouldn’t really get much time alone. whether that’s for date night or even time to have sex, it can be really difficult in those times lol

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

isaac isn’t one to fall asleep fast

he takes him time to fall asleep as he’d want to stay by your side and take your presence in

requests are closed

═══════*.·:·.☽✧✦✧☾.·:·.*═══════

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═══════*.·:·.☽✧✦✧☾.·:·.*═══════

[beevean]

So I've never watched SU, but lemme get this straight:

That show is fascist propaganda because its dictator villains are not killed in the end

But when NFCV revives its genocidal villain alongside his wife just to give him a happy ending, complete with the showrunner saying that he's pretty much the hero of his own story, that's ok because he's a sad wet cat of a man?

Yep, you got it! :D

Which is just hilarious to me, because N!Dracula is just male Blue Diamond:

A weeping dictator made ineffectual by his grief, but still cruel enough to spread his misery everywhere he can.

And I actually remember when some fans used to consider her the most sympathetic Diamond precisely because she cried a lot, while Yellow expressed her grief through anger, denial and war (so basically being game Dracula lol), even though Blue had lovely lines such as "I want to know what [Rose] thinks we're going to do with her... because I want to do something worse."

Villains with emotions are still villains, guys! It's not a hard concept! A kid's show trusts its audience to get it! So how come the deepest game adaptation of all time expects you to feel sorry for the poor bapyboys and bapygirls just because they're a little sad, not only asking you to ignore all the atrocities they committed but even lowkey blaming the victims because they were stupid?

Dracula didn't even go through a redemption arc! Pass Isaac who in theory had a character progression, and pass Lenore who you can imagine had time to think off-screen and you can interpret the story changing her personality as her deciding to be softer on Hector (although you know I have my doubts). Dracula had none of that! He died only because he realized that in his fury he was about to kill his son, but his feelings on mankind sure didn't change! The only thing that changed was that he got his wife back! And... what, is that enough to erase his misanthropy and genocidal sentiments? So basically he was throwing the mother of all temper tantrums, but I'm still meant to celebrate that he got his candy, without understand what he did wrong?

Say what you want about the Diamonds speedrunning their "my God what have I done" realizations, but they had them!

Oh but fucking tell me more about how Mathias is so bad that he doesn't even deserve to be reincarnated as Soma. Again, the only difference between the two Dracs is that the show version is more "sympathetically" depressed... and the setting implies he was in the right in slaughtering humans because hey, they're stupid anyway.

[dongofthewolf]

Dancing in the Deepest Oceans- Chapter 3

Abby Anderson x Fem!Reader

Your first date with Abby doesn’t go quite as planned.

Warnings: mentions of blood and injury, swearing, angst, hurt/comfort, uhhh yea I did that

Here’s chapter three! It definitely took way longer than I expected to do since I really wanted to get a lot of those requests done, so I’m v sorry about that.

Also I kinda cheated and included someone’s request for a bath scene with Abby in this so shhhhh it’s fine I’m just lazy productive like that okay LOL. I hope you all enjoy (esp if you requested the scene) ! :)

Read the previous chapter here

You couldn’t believe this was actually happening. You felt like the protagonist in one of those cheesy rom-coms from back in the day; the ones where the girl suddenly stumbles into the arms of her true love and everyone sings a happy song, except this isn’t a movie and also it’s kind of the apocalypse or whatever. You didn’t care though, this was the closest thing to rom-com perfection you were getting and you couldn’t complain, because it was with her.

Though you had only known Abby for a few short days, something inside you couldn’t help but feel like you had known her your entire life. The intimacy of those few stolen glances, the slight brushes of your shoulders, the way your hand fit perfectly in hers; it all felt so natural. You just hoped she felt the same way. 

--

She should be here.

You glanced down at your watch again, it was 8:15. Maybe you had heard her wrong? No, she definitely said eight o clock. Your mind swarmed with possible excuses as to why she wasn’t here; perhaps she thought you were meeting at seven and now she was the one who thought you were standing her up, or maybe she thought you guys were meeting at your room and this was the fault of some kind of miscommunication, or maybe she simply forgot. You racked your brain for any possibilities as to why she wasn’t here, trying your best to neglect the most obvious reason out of denial or maybe fear.

The hallway was dark and quiet, the tile floor cold against your skin as you sat with your knees tucked tightly against your chest. Your back ached from leaning against the steel door, and you had become increasingly more embarrassed every time someone passed by. Their lingering gazes made you want to disappear into the earth beneath you. 

For at least an hour, you sat outside her door contemplating whether or not you should wait for her. Was this whole thing a mistake? Your heart began to sink at the frightening possibility that she had been toying with your feelings this whole time, that you were just a naive girl with a childish crush on this person you barely even knew. God, how could you have been so stupid? This is exactly why you never formed attachments; they always ended in heartbreak, disappointment, or both. As more time passed, the fear and sadness that occupied your thoughts slowly began to fade into frustration.

This was dumb. Why were you waiting around for her like some lost kitten? You scoffed at how pathetic you felt. Anger began to rise in your chest as you thought of all the things you’d say to her when you saw her—how you’d scold her for standing you up, dreaming up this gigantic speech about how if she wasn’t interested she should’ve just told you. Or maybe instead of yelling you would just never speak to her again. Give her the silent treatment for the rest of your life. That is what she wanted anyways, right? 

As you sat there arguing silently with yourself you heard a pair of heavy footsteps headed towards you. You craned your neck to try and see who or what was approaching you, but the hallway was too dark to get a clear view. Panic quickly replaced the anger that had been occupying your heart just seconds ago as you stood up from your uncomfortable position. You could hear the adrenaline pumping in your ears as you squint your eyes at the dark figure headed towards you. A sudden rush of relief fell over you when a familiar face appeared out of the shadows.

“Y/N.” Manny emerged from the darkness. His hair was slicked back into a bun and he wore a nervous expression on his face. The sole of his boots were caked with a thick layer of mud that left a trail of footprints in the hallways, and you pitied the poor soul who would have to clean it up.

“Where’s Abby?” There was a sharpness to your words. You knew you should've been a bit more conversational (Manny had done nothing to you after all), but after sitting on the floor for an hour, you didn’t feel like wasting time on bullshit small talk. If Abby was going to send Manny to get rid of you instead of doing it herself, then the last thing you cared about right now was seeming polite.

“Right, about that…” You raised your eyebrow, Manny’s expression was difficult to interpret and you could tell he was here to break some kind of news to you, but for some reason it felt like whatever bomb he was about to drop was far worse than what you had expected.

“Manny, what’s going on?” You took a small step towards him, searching his face for an answer.

“Isaac sent Abby and I on a supply run this morning. Nothing too difficult, just transporting a few things to another base but…” Manny looked down at his feet as he contemplated his next words “but we ran into a group of scars on our way back and we got separated.”

You suddenly felt a tinge of guilt for thinking all those things about Abby. “W-what do you mean you got separated? Where’s Abby now?” 

Manny’s eyes were fixed to the floor as he delivered the news, his thumbs twiddling together nervously. “I uh… well, I don’t know.” Manny noticed your face twist with anger at his answer and tried to diffuse some of it “But Isaac’s already sent out a group to find her. It’s going to be okay Y/N, Abby is one of Isaac’s top soldiers and you know he’ll do whatever he can to find her.”

You were speechless, but more than anything you were frustrated. Frustrated at yourself for thinking such horrible things about Abby—for having such little faith in her. You wanted to scream at your past self for being so ignorant. Tears began to well in your eyes and Manny’s words did little to comfort you.

“I should be out there.” You marched down the hallway determined to find Abby but Manny was quicker.

His hand grabbed your wrist and pulled you back “You can’t go out there Y/N, you’ll die. Abby’s smart, okay? She’ll find her way back.” 

You tried to resist his grip on your wrist even though you knew he was right. You weren’t a soldier nor did you have the proper training to leave the outpost alone. And while a large part of you knew it was stupid to try and leave, a much bigger part of you didn’t care. You had to find Abby; you were willing to do anything, even if that meant putting yourself in harm's way. 

“I don’t care, I have to go out there.” You managed to yank yourself free from his grip and booked it towards the door but Manny was quick and caught you. Wrapping his arms around your stomach and hoisting you over his shoulder Manny carried you into his and Abby’s room while you fought and cried like a little kid. 

“Fucking let go of me Manny!” Tears stained your cheeks as you sobbed into Manny’s shirt. 

When Manny finally set you down on his bed you were exhausted from crying; the only thing left in your heart now was an overwhelming feeling of helplessness. You weren’t even allowed to leave the outpost to look for Abby, and the only thing you could do was sit in this wretched room praying she didn’t get mauled by a clicker or hung by a Seraphite. 

Manny didn’t feel any better about this than you did, in fact it was his job as Abby’s partner to watch out for her and he failed. Now his best friend was missing and it’s all his fault. The guilt weighed heavily on Manny as he tried to comfort you while you wept silently into his pillow. Even though he couldn’t have possibly predicted the surprise attack, he still felt like this entire thing was his doing. He tried to plead with Isaac to let him go back out and search for Abby but he refused, so Manny figured keeping you safe was the least he could do. 

Hours later you got up from Manny’s bed to use the bathroom, and he was nowhere to be found. You figured he probably went to bother Isaac about Abby or something, he was persistent like that.

You splashed some cold water on your face before tipping your head under the faucet to help ease the dryness in your throat. When you brought your head back up you almost didn’t recognize the person staring back at you in the mirror. Your eyes were red and puffy and there were dark circles under your eyes like you haven’t slept in days. You looked like a mess. Your hair was wild and unruly but at least with that outfit you had spent way too long picking out, you still looked pretty cute. 

At least you were a hot mess.

The longer you stared at yourself in the mirror, the more unrecognizable your face became. And then for reasons you couldn’t explain, you started laughing. A hysterical laugh that echoed off the walls in the bathroom like a sick symphony fell unwillingly from your mouth, and you couldn’t stop. There was something so incredibly sardonic about the events of these past few hours, that your body just decided to break out into a breathless cackle. It was a twisted reaction to a terrifying situation but for some reason it wouldn’t go away. Your stomach began to ache and your throat was dry and sore again. It felt like this sickening nightmare would never end. 

You felt tears begin to well up again when you heard something that immediately shook you from your shocked state: the rattling of the doorknob.

Your heart swelled with hope as you ran towards the door, not concerned about waking up the people in the rooms next door with your loud footsteps. The door creaked open, flooding the dark room with a pale yellow light that blinded you, and from that light emerged a figure you knew all too well— one that you had become intimately familiar with.

Abby limped through the door, at first not even realizing you were standing right there. You were looming in the darkness like some kind of monster, and you tried to speak but nothing came out. The only thing that snapped you out of it was the sound of Abby’s voice, hoarse and hushed like she was speaking into the darkness rather than you. God, you almost forgot how much you loved the sound of her voice. 

“Y/N?” Abby wasn’t sure if she was imagining this. She thought maybe the expired pain meds had some hallucinatory side effects and you were just what she wanted to see the most. Abby’s doubts faded into nothing when you took a small step into the light. In that moment she knew that this was real—that you were real.

When your eyes finally adjusted to the harsh lights you saw her face and gasped. To say Abby was in rough shape would be putting it lightly. There were cuts and bruises all over her face and body, and her clothes were absolutely filthy, but you couldn’t be bothered with that right now. You ran into her arms to embrace her tightly and Abby winced at the contact. Quickly you pulled back out of fear you hurt her, but Abby’s arms wrapped around your shoulders, pulling you back in.

Abby let out a loud exhale and for a small moment the jabbing pains all over her body ceased to exist. The only thing occupying her mind was the warmth of your body—how she could feel your heart beating with how tightly she was holding you, and she could finally exhale.

When you pulled away, a flood of emotions suddenly began to flow through you, filling you to the brim until the only words you could manage to mutter out through choked sobs were “I thought you were-“

“I know. I’m sorry.” There was a somber expression on Abby’s face as she wiped the tears from your cheek with the pads of her thumbs. 

You sniffed, looking up at her, you cleared your throat before speaking “Jesus Abby, your face.“ you softly grabbed Abby’s chin, examining her injuries in the light. There were crimson slices all over her face, and she was beaten black and blue. A particularly deep cut on her forehead had been stitched carefully and there was a cotton bandage wrapped around her left forearm. The state of your distress now seemed like peanuts compared to Abby’s state.

Without thinking you hugged Abby again tightly, revelling in the comfort of her embrace. Abby’s eyes were closed when you wrapped your arms around her, her eyebrows were furrowed and you weren’t sure if she was about to cry or scream. Though you didn’t know much about Abby, you did know she was a soldier—a warrior who wasn’t disturbed easily. You had no idea what she had just been through, but whatever happened had shaken her up pretty good. 

“Here.” Bringing your arms up to the strap of her backpack, you helped her ease it off her shoulder. She let out a breath of relief as you lifted the weight from her back and placed it near the door. 

Looking at Abby now you finally realized how dirty she was. There was mud and grime all over her clothes and her braid was loose and unruly. 

“Hey, uh I’ll run a bath for you, just wait here.” Considering her state you figured a bath would be more relaxing than a shower. Besides, you needed to feel useful right now, and if that meant taking care of Abby for a bit? You didn’t mind at all.

Hesitantly, you made your way to the bathroom and laid out a small towel on the tile floor. Turning on the faucet, you placed the plug in the tub and made your way to Abby, guiding her to the edge of the tub. “Let me know if the water is too hot, okay?”

Abby nodded as she ran her hand under the running water, letting the warmth fall between her fingers. When the tub was full, you turned off the faucet and stood up, using Abby’s shoulders to help steady you as you started for the door but something stopped you. 

“Wait-“ You stopped, Abby’s hand was over the one you placed on your shoulder, securing it there so you wouldn’t leave. She looked at you with pleading eyes as she spoke “Can… can you stay?” Abby didn’t say anything more but you could tell by the look in her eyes she needed you here. 

“Sure. I’ll turn around and you can get undressed.” You turned to face the door, looking down at the tile floor as you traced the crevices with your finger. The only sound that could be heard was the droplets of water that fell from the faucet echoing against the walls and the soft rustling of Abby removing her clothes. Eventually you heard Abby lower herself into the tub, she let out a loud sigh as the tension in her muscles dissipated from the warm water.

“You can turn around now.” Abby’s voice was quiet when she finally spoke.

Slowly you turned around to see Abby sitting in the tub, her legs tucked against her chest as she hugged herself tightly. Her eyes were fixed on the floor of the tub while she rested her chin on her knee. It broke your heart when you saw her injuries in the light. There were deep purple bruises along her shoulder blades and scabbed over cuts along her arms and legs. You also saw scars, a lot of them. Some were old and faded, while others were new, probably sustained within the last couple of weeks.

The steam from the water floated up, fogging the mirrors and warming the room. You made your way to the edge of the tub with a small washcloth, dipping it into the water just slightly. “Here.”

Bringing your finger to Abby’s chin you lifted her eyes to face yours. Her features softened when you met her gaze and lightly you brought the washcloth to her face. Careful to avoid the stitches on her forehead, you rid the dirt from her face, dipping the cloth into the water every once in a while before bringing it back to her face.

Her freckles were more prominent in the light and her eyes stuck attentively studying your movements. When all the grime was gone, you couldn’t help but notice a whisper of a blush on Abby’s cheeks. 

“One hell of a first date, huh?” Abby spoke seriously but you could see a hint of a smirk on the edge of her mouth. A bit of her normal self was beginning to return.

Sitting up more straight now you gave her a small smile. “This is definitely the most interesting one I’ve ever been on.” 

You reached for her braid, undoing the elastic and separating the strands from each other while Abby spoke. “Oh so you’ve never bathed someone during a first date?”

“I can confidently say that this is my first.” Grabbing the small bar of soap from the dish in the corner, you dipped it into the water and lathered it between your fingers. 

The soap filled the air with the scent of pine and rain and you sighed at the smell. It filled your senses and reminded you of the first time you saw her. Not the time in the cafeteria but on that rainy day when you bumped into her for the first time. You inhaled deeply; it smelled like her.

Gently you began massaging the bubbles into Abby’s hair. Weaving the blonde locks through your fingers, and purposely taking longer than necessary. Watching closely as Abby’s muscles relaxed and her eyes fluttered closed from your touch. 

“Lean back.” Shielding her face from the water you grabbed a cup and poured the water over her head, letting the bubbles wash away from her scalp and into the water. “Is this okay?” 

Abby hummed in response and you took that as a yes. You repeated the process while you washed the soap from her hair, doing it a couple more times than needed because you knew it calmed her. 

The bathroom was quiet again, the only sound coming from the steady flow of water from the cup onto her head, and into the water. It was peaceful, and the both of you were content in this familiar silence. Appreciating each other’s company without the need to fill the air.

When you were done you sat up and laid out a towel for Abby, drying your hands on your shirt. “I’ll grab you some clean clothes, just give me a sec.” 

You left Abby to dry off while you searched for some clean clothes. Grabbing what you assumed was a clean shirt and a pair of sweatpants, you made your way back to the bathroom. Standing outside the door, you knocked lightly. “Can I come in?” 

Before you could wait for an answer, Abby opened the door a bit, hiding herself behind it. You handed Abby the clothes and she gave you an appreciative smile, it was small but genuine. “Thanks.” 

You sat beside the bathroom door waiting for Abby and trying not to think about the fact that she could’ve died out there. She was here and that’s all that mattered for now.

Your mind wandered as you picked at your sleeve, you noticed there were a few wet spots on your shirt from the edge of the tub. The cool air made you shiver and you regretted not bringing a sweater, even if this was supposed to be a night in. 

When Abby finally emerged from the bathroom you quickly stood up, unsure of what to do next. Her hair was still damp and spread across her shoulders; this was the first time you had ever seen her without that signature braid and you were in awe of how beautiful she looked. It was such a strange thought but it was the only thing occupying your mind. There was something so rare about seeing her like this that you couldn’t stop the flutter in your heart when it happened. 

Grabbing her hand, you led her to the bed on the opposite side of Manny’s and pulled the covers back so she could slip in. When she settled under the sheets you neatly tucked her in before standing up again. 

You didn’t know what to do now. Would it be rude to stay? Abby clearly needed the rest, but something in you desperately wanted to stay. You decided to let her sleep and started towards the door when you heard a small voice from beneath the covers. “Stay. Please.”

Abby’s voice was quiet and you could hear the exhaustion behind it. You looked at her with a smile and sat down on the bed next to her, pushing a strand of hair from her forehead before smoothing it down softly. She looked at you apologetically as you caressed her head, and  you gave her a look of reassurance even if you were scared out of your mind. Her eyes fluttered closed and her features softened from your touch. You stayed like this for a while, continuing even after her breathing had slowed and you knew she was asleep.

You stayed up watching her sleep; studying the way her mouth was slightly agape as she let out small breaths. She looked so peaceful.

A small teardrop escaped from your eye, and you quickly wiped it away. You knew this wasn’t going to be the last time she’d be like this; battered and bruised and fighting a war that seemed to never end. It hurt your heart to know that she was on this path of self-destruction, but what hurt most was knowing she’d likely never stop. 

You tried not to think about that right now. Eventually letting your attention fall onto the wet shirt that was still stuck to different parts of your body. Removing the item you walked over to the drawer where you had found the clothes for Abby and slipped on one of her t-shirts. It was devastatingly oversized on you but it was warm and smelled like her. 

You settled onto the space next to Abby’s bed, ignoring the ache in your back as you lay flat on the floor beneath you. Though the pain was worth enduring with the knowledge that Abby was here, and that’s all that mattered to you right now. 

While you lay on the floor you began thinking about how different things were just hours ago. It wasn’t long ago that you were practically dancing like an idiot in your mirror because you were going on a date with Abby. It’s strange how many emotions you had gone through in one day, you were almost positive you had broken some kind of record. You chuckled at yourself; surely no one was going to spontaneously break out into a song like in the movies, but you didn’t mind. This was enough— being here with Abby was enough. 

Eventually, exhaustion overtook your body and you quickly felt your eyes becoming heavier. The floor was beginning to feel a lot more comfier than when you had sat down and before you knew it, you had fallen into a deep slumber.

[trafalgar-lavv-blog]

I've recently gotten back into Naruto so I started watching it from the very beginning and I am in so much denial about all the deaths that have yet to happen. This show is gonna wreck me