#is this the minions anon was talking about

[the-lonelyshepherd]

any time someone annoyed you tag me I'll kill them for real

i’ll keep this in mind

[oldbutchdanielcraig]

The s3 idea I've had this week is Daniel gripping is pen as Lestat goes on and on about Armand and being like "I didn't realize how /involved/ he was". Either for emotionally tormenting Daniel (not wanting to think about his erstwhile maker day in/day out)(Armand wrapped up the lesmand in like half an hour or whatever) or that it's triggering memories. The bitchy levels, the emotional torment, Assad on our screens, all delightful.

YESSSSS. and i have to believe they will give us something like this due to the mere fact alone that the "i'm guessing you haven't heard from my maker?" is so similar narratively and as of yet basically the only real devil's minion we have (LMAO). i mean lestat is going to tell daniel all of this because he's pissed that armand did it in 30 minutes and literally refused to mention gabrielle but i also like the idea that he's doing it to torture daniel by bringing up his maker. daniel will, of course, be aptly tortured by this. armand armand armand armand armand until it's pounding in his brain like a hammer. so to speak. i also like the idea that nobody really knows about daniel and armand's past and so lestat is triggering memories left and right which he doesn't know or gaf about, and daniel has that old man kicked puppy look on his face as he's haunted by thoughts of armand blowing his back out 50 years ago

[desertfangs]

The Armand/Daniel throwaway is insane because while I don’t see it as canon, (and I don’t think it’s meant to be taken as such), I do believe it makes their lore a lot richer and more poignant. Anne hit gold with them man, she really did. And in a way we’re pretty lucky. We got the best chapter OF ALL TIME written about them, followed by the weirdest, messiest breakup plans that never came to fruition, followed by a few one liners about them getting back together. Who knows what would’ve happened if she had decided to flesh out their story further and I’m scared to consider the possibilities. We know what we need to know and now the world is ours 😌

Yeah, it's not meant to be canon. Canon is anything published in the text itself. Anything else (notes, drafts) are things Anne chose not to include for whatever reason and while it can help us all inform the text if we so choose, she as a writer decided against using these in the final versions. It sure is fun though!!

AND YES IT IS INSANE!! Because even though I agree some of the dialogue does not sound like Daniel or anything he would say, their dynamic is there!! That is THEM. It's weird and it's messed up but you totally get shades of them in those notes and maybe a finished, polished version would have really done them justice. We will never know!

But you're right! We are so lucky. She really hit lightning in a bottle with Armand/Daniel. It's such a great story, they are such fascinating characters, and Devil's Minion is such a wild chapter. Their parts in QotD really tell us so much about them and how they interact and what they love about each other, even though it's so few pages.

It will always break my heart a little that Daniel was tossed aside in the final trilogy. I get that he wasn't really part of the story she was trying to tell, and that's why he gets a line here or there about being with Armand, but is otherwise not mentioned after Prince Lestat, but wow, I would have loved to see Daniel there to comfort Armand after Marius calls him a child or he bears his soul to Lestat, or any of that stuff. And of course I would have loved an actual reunion chapter beyond just "they're out hunting together." (Of course I think we got the same thing with Marius and Armand in the QotD... 😒😒)

But--and I've said this before--part of why I was scared to read the final books was a deep-seated fear that she was going to kill Daniel off. It felt like she had no use for him and I was terrified for his safety. So even though we only get a few lines about him being back with Armand, we know they've reconnected, and honestly, that's more than I had hoped for.

And the playground is ours now, absolutely! I've loved seeing how other people flesh out this stuff in fics and headcanons and art, and I love doing it myself. So while I regret the lack of Daniel in the rest of the series, there's so much potential for stories to tell, and this fandom has really stepped up to the plate on that score. 💖

[inkykeiji]

“go grab me a beer”

- any dabi talking to his infant son

LIKE LITERALLY THO LMAOOOOOOOOO

[nightcolorz]

If you could change one thing in TVC book canon, what would it be?

This is a really good question! It’s difficult bcus there’s just so many things I’d change lol, so settling on one is the hard part. I suppose I’d probably eradicate David Talbot. For one, out of all the things that I dislike about canon or wish weren’t a part of it, he’s the most prevalent, since in some books he’s a genuine main character. I really dislike David Talbot, and unlike other characters whom I dislike, there’s literally nothing interesting about him or his role in the story that justifies him as a character . Like, for example, Marius. Hate the guy, but I don’t wish he didn’t exist bcus he’s a valuable and significant part of the chronicles and a genuinely interesting character. Can’t say the same about David Talbot. Every time he’s around I can’t help but feel like I’m reading about someone’s awkwardly inserted oc in a bad fanfic. You know how they’re always just there, not doing much bcus the author didn’t know how to organically fit them canon? Then the author tries to convince us that the oc and the canon characters have bonds and relationships, but their attempts at writing those just come off as unnatural and unconvincing, bcus the oc sticks out so plainly among all these pre-existing characters with established relationships. That’s how David Talbot comes off to me, lol. If not eradicating David Talbot I’d choose to eradicate the VC and Mayfair Witch crossover books, for obvious reasons ha. Otherwise, I considered it, but I don’t think I’d choose to get rid of or change the “problematic” aspects of canon bcus I don’t believe that’s a helpful or progressive sentiment. Choosing to purge the chronicles of their uncomfortable, weird, and offensive aspects, though I understand the appeal, I think wouldn’t result in the reform we assume it would. I think instead we’d just have a more sanitized and less nuanced book series and fandom. When it comes to being a fan of these books, taking the good with the bad and making sense and meaning of it all is an important part of the experience, and it’s not really an experience that many other fandoms require. I guess what I’m trying to say is that all the problematic, weird, bat shit stuff in TVC creates a culture in this fandom that encourages us to think critically and complexly about the media we are engaging with. And I think that culture is very special, and not very common in many other fandoms, so I don’t think I’d choose to eradicate the problematic bcus it would take away from that. Does that make sense? Thank you anon sm for sending the ask ❤️ it really got me thinking. I’m sorry for going on a bit of a side tangent, lol.

[astradyke]

please never stop talking about loverboy phil

anon i do everything for you

thinking abt how phil was there when dan dropped out of law school. thinking abt how phil argued to bring dan on the jamaica trip that dan was not supposed to be on originally so phil could be with him. thinking about how dan comes to the lesters for the holidays, "tagged along to a lester thing", how dan came to phil's family home and how phil's family accepted dan with open arms. how hyper and annoying dan is in some of the younger era videos (like old cooking videos, the tree etc) and how it makes phil smile. how phil bought him a tonberry and bought him that fancy candle and won him a plush from a claw machine. how phil keeps bringing up dan's solo work not even just in the videos focused on them (think haircut vid, dan is leaving me, etc) but in all other videos-- like dan's book kept getting brought up by phil. an underrated moment in wdapteo 2 that i think about CONSTANTLY is the fact that at the end phil plugs some of dan's merch too and does his little smile as he does. "for treating us with your presence". how in the date night video when asked what animal dan would be phil immediately went with bear. wdapteo 3 where phil is wearing one of dan's viewers pick my outfit sweaters, and how we would see years later that phil took like 100 silly photos of dan in the minion fit from that video (which proves my belief that half of phil's camera roll is just dan). how dan walks faster and ahead of phil but phil takes photos while dan is walking like the one in türkiye. how phil made him spaghetti when he was ill. how constantly phil talks about dan needing to wear color. him hyping up gay but not proud (and also BEING in gay but not proud). him being in the audience of dan's one off comedy routine about being gay. him being in the we're all doomed audience. him probably being dan's first subscriber. love eyes lester which is SO LETHAL it's so lethal. how dan will ramble and get annoyed at phil and phil will just giggle and laugh. phil playing with dan's hair. "you > everyone in the universe." the recent press the button video where phil said (when given the option to live forever alongside all of his now immortal loved ones) that dan would be immortal. "i haven't seen you for 10 hours i wanted to tell you about my lexicon". texting dan nonsense in wdapteo 4 for 3 days straight and not receiving a reply and pouting about it. taking the photo outside his window when dan asked to see if he could see him. being endlessly the no.1 sister daniel fan, accepting dan's experimentation with sister daniel relentlessly. there's so many more. there's so many more.

i'm really normal about htis by the way.

[inuiiwonderland]

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE HEAR ME OUT..

Y/n who falls out of love when [twst character of your choice #1] doesn’t show interest, and when Y/n does fall out of love they get all sad because they DID really try for that person. But then comes in [twst character of your choice #2] who comforts Y/n and then they kinda just fall in love from there. BUT what Y/n DIDNT know was that [twst character of your choice #1] knew that Y/n was in love with them and also had feelings for them but didn’t know how to express it

IS IT vISIONINGN?!?!?

—🐍anon

ISNSNDKD YES I SEE THE VISION ANON!!! I had a really fun time writing this so enjoy!🤍

Sorry if it’s ass. I haven’t written anything in a fat minute🥲

Dead and new feelings

Character pairing: Ace x gn! Reader (feat. Azul)

Words: 1.5k

-

A huge frown was shown in both of the boys' faces as they watched you fawn over the octavinelle housewarden. Ace brows furrowing even further seeing you talk highly of the octo mer and having a deeper frown the more he heard you call him “cute” and “amazingly smart”.

Yuck

He can already feel the throw up in his mouth

“He’s so cute and smart!”

“You mean a bitch?” He says. Arms crossed over his chest as he gave you a disgusted and judgmental look.

“Ace!” Deuce says as he quickly looks around to make sure said housewarden or his minions aren’t nearby. He’s still traumatized by the events that occurred not so long ago with octavinelle housewarden and his two companions.

“What?! Don’t act like I didn’t hear you calling him a bitch the other day when he walked past us in the halls” The boy shrieks as he slams his hand over Ace's mouth.

“Shut up!”

“Ew get your hands off me!” You rolled your eyes as you continued to day dream about Azul.

“What are you two doing?” The three of you both scream as you all turn around to see the heartslabyul housewarden.

“Housewarden!”

“Riddle!”

The young boy raises a brow.

“I thought you two said you were going to be studying”

“We are! Look see” Deuce shows him all the books and papers as he gave his housewarden an awkward smile. Riddle sighs. Clearly annoyed.

“You two must be in the dorm by 3. Don’t be late or else it’s off with your heads” The two freshmen nod. Ace mutters a low “bitch” under his breath as you kick his foot from under the table.

“You got it housewarden!”

Satisfied, he leaves without another word.

“Ace you could’ve gotten in trouble if he heard you!”

“IF! But he didn’t” You smack his shoulder before standing up and gathering up all your things.

“Well then, I’ll be leaving now”

“What?! Why?” Ace whines as he tries to pull you back down to your seat.

“Because unlike you, I have very important things to do!”

“Lameeee” Deuce smacks the back of his head.

“It’s not lame if the prefect wants to focus on more important matters!”

“Ugh lame! Both of you!” This time, he gets two smacks from the both of you.

-

It wasn’t a secret that you have a thing for octavinelle housewarden. All of your friends knew about this “little” crush on the second year boy.

Even Floyd and Jade know about your crush on their housewarden. Much to your embarrassment.

You blame Ace for that. You came to his basketball practice after class since he was BEGGING you to come and watch. When they went on break, he jogged over to you as you handed him his water bottle.

“How was class?” He asks as he takes a sip of his water.

“Amazing!” He raises a brow at you, motioning to you to tell him more.

“Today in Mr.Crewel class we had to pick a partner to do this small little assignment. I was going to ask Silver if he wanted to work with me but before I could go up and ask him Azul came up to me and asked if I wanted to work with him!” You squealed as you repeatedly punched his arm.

“He definitely wants me!” At that, Ace lets out a LOUD cackle which causes him to choke on his water. This obviously caught the attention of a certain eel who then made his way towards the both of you.

“Heyyy shrimpy are you telling jokes? I want to laugh too!” You froze as Ace continued to just cackle. Without thinking, Ace turns to Floyd and repeats the same words that you told him.

“They said that Azul wants them because he picked them as a partner for a quick assignment!” You gasp and your blood runs cold.

Oh you're definitely going to kill him

“Ace! You fucking idiot!”

“Ow! What the fuck did- ohhhh” He stops laughing and looks up at Floyd.

“Uhh…you're not gonna say anything…right?” Floyd just laughs as he runs away from the two of you.

So yeah, that’s the story of Ace being a loud mouth and blurting out your crush's name to one of his friends.

You remember being paranoid for WEEKS thinking that Floyd might’ve told Azul after he found out. You ignored him for a while after but once you saw that he wasn’t acting weird or different whenever he was around you you knew Floyd didn’t snitch.

Which you remember being grateful for

But that was in the past! Azul hasn’t been in your mind in a long time. In fact, you were starting to move on from your silly little crush on the octavinelle housewarden!

It did hurt at first. You truly did like Azul! But it was slowly starting to just become a little….draining? And a little embarrassing?

You did so much to make him notice you and the feelings that you had for him. But he was just not interested. You would even try to go out of your comfort zone for even a tiny piece of his attention! But you soon gave up afterwards knowing that your feelings aren't reciprocated.

And you remember feeling sad the day you realized that he doesn’t have the same feelings for you as you have for him. And that day was a tough day. You had grim and the ghosts comforting you that night as you cried your little heart out.

You remember Ace's comment the next day. The moment you entered the classroom with red eyes and a blank expression. He decided to be an ass that morning and make a comment about how you looked like shit.

You looked at him for a second before taking your seat next to him and remaining silent for the whole class period.

Obviously, Ace being Ace did in fact NOT like how quiet you were and how you didn’t react to any of his jokes or snarky comments when someone dared to try him. You remember him pulling you into an empty classroom that day and was ready to interrogate you about why you were so quiet today in class and why it looked like you were crying before class. But before he can continue with his rambling you broke down crying in front of him which immediately shut him up as he froze.

“Woah hey are you okay?” He grabs ahold of your shoulder as he leans his head down to get a good look at your face since you were facing down.

“Azul….” The first year immediately knew where this was heading and just pulled you forward in a hug.

“Ugh…I knew this day would come” You smacked his chest.

“Not now you Jackass”

“Oh! This is how you treat someone who’s trying to comfort you?!”

“Well you aren’t doing a good job at it!” He gasps in mock offense.

“Well excuse me for not meeting your expectations!” You both stayed silent before breaking into a fit of laughter. Ace hugs you tightly one last time before letting you go.

“But seriously I knew this day would come. Azul is an ass and he has ZERO experience in the love department” you raised an eyebrow at him.

“And you do? Didn’t you ghost your ex girlfriend-” He covers your mouth with his hand.

“Anyways! I’m sleeping over tonight. I can’t have you bawling the night before and appearing like a zombie the next day- OW WHAT THE FUCK!?”

“That’s what you get jerk!”

And that's when your moving on from Azul journey begins.

You were grateful to have a friend like Ace. Yes he can be an ass sometimes but when you were dealing with your unrequited love for Azul, he was there to comfort you in the end.

The two of you were close, yes but out of all your friends (minus grim. That’s your son), you were closest to Ace and Deuce.

During this time, you and Ace grew closer together. He would walk you to your classes, carry your bag even though you told him multiple times you’re capable of carrying it yourself, sneak out of his dorm late at night so the two of you can do movie nights, skipping class with him at times so the both of you can just snack on whatever stuff he bought from Sam’s shop.

He was helping you forget about the love you used to have for Azul. And you were grateful for that.

And you don’t know when it happened. But the two of you slowly started falling for each other. And months later, you two started dating.

And for Azul?

Well

He was in shambles

He was busy with some paperwork for the mostro lounge when Floyd suddenly slammed the door to his office wide open as he blurts out the news for him.

“Shrimpy and crabby are together! I saw them being all lovey dovey in the halls! Yuck”

The color drained from his face as he just sat there in complete disbelief.

“Pardon?”

This is impossible! He knew that you liked him. It was obvious! And he also likes you too! So how can you be dating ace?! Ace of all people?!

Now everytime he watches you and Ace walk past in the hallway. Goofing off while the two of you run hand in hand so you wouldn’t be late for class. He watches with deep regret.

Regret that he never was able to show or tell you that he likes you too.

-

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

Okay so i wanna see some more headcanons of the farmer ready to kick someone's ass so how about this:

Someone who is jealous of the farmer or like someone on like the enemy side, decided to kidnap their spouse to try and either ransom them or lure the farmer out, thinking it will be an easy win.

Then suddenly the next moment, the farmer already arrived before they could send a message to them (either the farmer got help from Mr.Qi or they track them down themselves), absolutely filled with rage and is now seconds away from beating the kidnapper.

How would the SDV/SVE bachelors and bachelorettes react to that?

I probably got the fastest rush of inspiration because holy cow, this is such a funny and cool scenario. Thank you so much, dear anon, for your ask! Enjoy! 💕

_____________________________

The bachelors/ettes reaction to their kidnapping for revenge/ransom, where their spouse Farmer, furious, comes to rescue them

SDV bachelors/ettes:

"You're demanding... 500 gold bars for me? I'm worth twice that, you know, even more! That's just insulting..." The kidnappers had already regretted their scheme before Farmer arrived to rescue Elliott, because the writer's outrage is already giving them a headache. Even with a gag in his mouth he's still talking! And just when they think the day can't get any worse, Farmer arrived quickly and kicked their asses. "Can you believe it, they only asked for 500 bars for me! I'm worth more than that, right dear?" Elliott was indignant to the core. Farmer grinned as they freed Elliott from the ropes, confirming that he was worth much more than that.

Sebastian did not think that in such a situation he would feel so... annoyed. Sure, being stolen by strangers had instilled fear at first, but when the leader of the gang started telling a self-pity story about how "I deserved everything, not Farmer, now I've stolen their lover and they're gonna pay!", Sebby thought the leader was some kind of cartoon villain. How absurd. Farmer who came in a couple of hours later also looks annoyed when the leader started telling their "villain arc". But before they can start, they get a fist in the face from Farmer, going straight to the realm of dreams. This was where Sebastian chuckled, at least something here was funny.

Shane's kidnapper was confident and said with a snide smile that either Farmer paid 500,000 gold for Shane or Farmer would "get their spouse in pieces". "800,000 gold and I'll ask Farmer not to kill you specifically." The kidnapper was a little taken aback by those words and the fact that the chicken man was completely calm. It was as if he didn't care. When the leader heard the noise and shouts of his minions, whose voices were quickly silenced, he turned to Shane in a panic and pleaded: " I only have 100,000 gold! Please, mercy!" "Alright, deal." Enough for the coop upgrade that Shane and his spouse have wanted for a long time.

"Heyyy, chill bro. Let's just talk, ok?" Unfortunately, Sam's smooth speech was met with only a rude "shut up, worthless musician!" in his direction. "I'm actually pretty good on guitar... So rude.." he muttered. When Farmer, angry as an ox, entered the room where their husband and the leader of the kidnapping "party" were, the kidnapper tried to soften the situation for themself. "They called me a worthless musician." The kidnapper turned around in horror at a smirking Sam. "And they also hit me." It wasn't true, but the kidnapper was already pale as ghost when Farmer turned red with rage after Sam's last words.

"Let me go now, or I'll kick your asses!" Though the ropes around Alex were tight, the athlete was unwilling to give up without a fight and continued to break free. "Shut up! You're going to pay for what your stupid Farmer-" "Don't you dare say that about my spouse!" The bravery was commendable, but the kidnapper was losing patience by now and wanted to send him into a knockout. But ended up knocking out themself as they didn't notice Farmer behind them. "What an asshole. I would have punched them!" Farmer reassured their really angry husband, as if it was Alex who was saving Farmer from bandits, not the other way around.

"Oh, Yoba..." Harvey would never have thought he would be kidnapped by anyone, but here he is - tied to a pole, surrounded by the six thugs. "Now we have to send a letter to that Farmer, and wait for the ransom, hehe. Easy money!" Harvey had been here for half an hour and was starting to get a little worried, but then he saw something in the distance that helped him gain confidence. "I hope, my friends, you stole my first aid kit too." "Need a sedative, doctor?" The leader didn't even have time to laugh at their own joke before they felt a chill run down their spine and turned around to see Farmer, sword in hand and an angry look in their eyes. "Not for me. For you."

Neither the gag nor the ropes helped - Abigail, irritated and angry, kicked, bit, punched and screamed as hard as she could, not giving her captors a moment's peace. Even with her sword taken away, the fighting girl put on quite a show, which made the bandits decide that the idea of ransoming Farmer wasn't such a great idea anymore. They were just thinking of letting Abby go free when Farmer came in, just as angry as their purple-haired wife. Abigail took back her sword and stood beside her spouse. The kidnappers made a note that they (if they survive) vow to themselves not to steal any more adventurers.

"So much negative energy around you... My friend, you can't live like that!" No matter how much the kidnapper tried to say that Emily wasn't their friend, but enemy's wife, the blue-haired girl insisted on helping her captor. Yes, she realises she's been kidnapped, but the lair she wasn't kept in was so dark and stuffy that of course this poor person is only thinking evil thoughts! Farmer who had made a huge hole in the wall with a furious punch had at least brought in some light. To the villain lying unconscious, Emily would leave a note with "get well soon!", diet tips and exercises for mind and body.

The criminals who had kidnapped Haley decided that if they were going to get any money for the already-not-so-easy job, they were going to spend half of it on hearing care. Because Haley was screaming so loudly that it looked like the kidnappers' eardrums had already burst. Plus the girl didn't spare her manicure and scratched the gangsters' hands, and someone's face. The leader was already tired, but Farmer literally breaking through the wall of their lair made it clear that it wasn't the worst yet. And Haley, freed from the ropes, ran to hug Farmer. Of course she wasn't afraid, for she knew her spouse would rescue her!

Penny sat as quietly as a mouse, afraid to anger the two thugs guarding her cage. She still can't understand how she was just walking from the farmhouse in Pelican Town to get groceries and a minute later she was kidnapped and ransomed from Farmer for 100,000 gold. Yoba, she's so scared, where is her spouse...? The answer to her question was not long in coming: Farmer kicked open the cell door, knocked out the guards, and took Penny in their arms as they both left the room. The girl was still scared and confused, which made Farmer want to kick the kidnappers' arse again. But their beloved wife came first, everything else - later.

To Leah's credit, before the gang of kidnappers could tie her hands, the artist managed to knock out two of them and throw a sculpture hammer at the head of the gang leader. Even being kidnapped, the girl did not lose her courage, giggling a little at the leader, who, already with a bump on their head, goes back and forth and promises that she and her spouse will pay for all the "humiliations they have suffered in the past". What those "humiliations" were Leah didn't have time to ask (and didn't really want to know) before Farmer broke into the room, knocked out the rest of the bandits and put another bump on the leader's head. All this to Leah's cheers. She wasn't scared at all.

Maru kept calm and thought of an escape plan. "Okay, no big deal. I memorised the path when they dragged me here. Now I need to break the ropes on my arms, sneak past the guards, turn left and-" Maru couldn't think of her plan any further as her spouse, furious at their wife's kidnapping, kicked the wall completely and started punching all the bandits left and right. "Oh, alright then." Considering she had only been kidnapped for less than half an hour, Maru didn't even have time to be frightened before she was already free, making her way around the kidnappers who were lying on the ground unconscious.

SVE bachelors/etter:

To be completely honest, Lance wasn't even that angry at his captors so much as he was slightly ashamed that he, the second in command of The First Slash Clan, had allowed himself to be captured by the amateurs, even if they had used magic for this. He made a note to himself to resume certain training. The pink-haired man already wanted to burn his ropes with magical fire, but his beloved spouse Farmer, agitated and angry as a swarm of wasps, kicked all the bandits' asses with sword and magic. Lance broke his ropes and joined the fight as well, though at first, the adventurer wanted not to rush his release, but to watch Farmer in battle with admiration and love.

"Again?" No need for Magnus' kidnapper to be so surprised - he is already old wizard, so he's seen a lot of things in his life and has been kidnapped before. Once even by mages from Gotoro, but that's a story for later. And while the kidnapper was able to take the wizard by surprise and strip him of his magic, it wouldn't work that way with his dear spouse. To which the villain shouted "I'll take away the Farmer's magic too!" Maybe, but Farmer would just start beating them with their bare hands. Which is exactly what happened half an hour ago. The enraged Farmer didn't leave a wet spot on the poor fella, so Magnus even cast a healing spell.

"Scared, white collar? Will you call your mommy for help? Or your spouse? Ha!" In any other situation, Victor would really be shaking with fear and not understanding whether the kidnappers would really hurt him if Farmer didn't pay for his ransom. But his spouse was Farmer, a man who just yesterday had slaughtered a hundred serpents at Skull Cavern as if it were a routine outing. "I'm afraid you're the one who's going to need help." And immediately after those words, Farmer burst into the room, angry and covered in blood (not their own). The kidnappers were pale, and Victor hurriedly closed his eyes, because he'd never seen Farmer so angry before. Which meant the bandits would get hurt. A lot.

"This is outrageous! How dare you take me against my will and steal my jewellery! Dragging me here, in this damp and filthy place where rats run around! Disgusting!" If the kidnappers were expecting cries for help, tears and pleas for mercy from Olivia, they will be quickly disappointed. She's a combative woman, and even huge bullies can't intimidate the ex-Joja accountant. She's dealt with worse, believe her. Well, the thugs think they'll at least get their money's worth, Olivia's dressed rich. Yeah, right... they'll just get a hit from an angry Farmer who turned up as soon as they found out where the bastards had taken their wife.

"They will pay... For all my creatures of darkness that they destroyed in Badlands, for all their exploits that made me unable to take over the Valley. Farmer will pay. And you're going to help me do it! When they come for you, I'll- Hey, are you even listening to me?!" Please forgive Claire, but the poor girl was so tired (work + family) that she slept through both her kidnapping and the gang leader's speech. The cashier woke up already when she felt someone carrying her in the arms. Her spouse looked at Claire with a smile, saying that she should immediately take a vacation and rest. Lying on the ground criminals, unconscious? Um, that was... part of a dream, yes. Just a strange dream.

"I advise you to let go, because when the Farmer comes here, you'll be sorry." At Scarlett's attempts to reason with her captors, the gang only mocked the girl. "We're waiting for Farmer, dumbass, it's an ambush!" Scarlett just sighed tiredly and waited - she had no choice. The bandits had already set traps everywhere, but Farmer was not only good at fighting, but also smart, and made an ambush on the ambush. Then caught the kidnappers off guard and kicked everyone's ass. "Warned ya," Scarlett even felt a little sorry for the bandits - they wouldn't be walking normally for a while.

Not knowing what was happening, trembling at the predatory grins of the strangers, Sophia cried quietly, trying not to make too much noise so as not to anger her captors. The villains haven't had time to get the ransom yet, and already they're arguing over who gets more gold. Farmer broke through the wall, shocking everyone. The tears on their pink-haired wife's cheeks were enough for Farmer to see red, and all the kidnapper-losers were knocked out. Before Sophia could even realise what had happened, she was already, freed, clinging to he's spouse's neck as Farmer carried her in bridal style. "Just like a fairy tale.... 💖"

[iguessweallcrazyithinktho]

So it's come to my attention a little birdy @judegossip has been lying about shit on here. I'm honestly ok with most gossip account everyone is on their own thing, it's cool, but this girl in particular is a fucking mess.

First off I make a post saying y'all need to be careful with what you're posting on here because rightfully so, football player teams look on social media(especially Jude. This isn't an opinion or a guess it's a fucking fact) to see what bullshit y'all say to damage his reputation and what not, And not even a few hours later she makes a post saying Toby messaged her.

BUT ACTUALLY HE DIDN'T! She got someone else to message her and make it seem like it was Toby

Don't read any further if you don't like gossip. You've been warned!

The account (who I have no problems with btw) made up a fake story at her request and she proceeded to post acting as if Toby was the one who sent that shit to her ass

Not only is she deranged but she's also clearly lying and her anons are obviously making fanfictions against Jude. Now I want to tell you, as someone who has had a gossip account before I know for a fact you can send anons to yourself through desktop. And people lie because it's easy. Not only is she trying to make it out as if Jude is gay she also keeps making claims Jude has had a 3some with Toby and she has a picture of said 3some taking place. And Jude is some shitty ex boyfriend because "someone close to Jude" came to Tumblr and told you.(I've heard that one before too lol)

My momma didn't raise a fucking fool. As I stated people make stuff up and I have once or twice lied about knowing something or having something when I didn't for attention (stupid right? I know. I was young and dumb)

Also her talking about toby potential nose job why do you gaf exactly? She clearly has some weird beef with Toby for no fucking reason at all. Here she is continuing to feed into this shit, lying to her anons as if she wasn't the one making this up

She's homophobic and also she's a zonist apparently (the account who messaged me has proof of that). I doubt this woman is a real jude fan the way she talks about this man and his family and friends.

Now idgaf if her or her little minions come at me( nothing you say will hurt my feelings. Everything is funny to me) but I refuse to sit here and let someone do this shit. Not only is it deranged but clearly she's a serial attention seeker who ego is driven by people anonymous messaging her. I don't know if you're a fucking child or something but you need help babe and I hope you get it because you need that shit

I don't want to be a gossip account so I won't answer too many anons on this. Instead I'll answer something via tags or message me and I'll explain. I will also not be tagging any post after this unless necessary to do so. The tags are supposed to be a fun place, not a shitty one. (also I don't care if you share this anywhere else other than Tumblr)

[armandology]

DM fic recs tonight? DM fic recs tonight queen??

devils minion fic recs tonight anon!!!

domestication of the species by blueskiddoo

It’s not how Daniel expected to find him. Ever, really. Even at his lowest, shaken up by Daniel’s little coup d'etat in Dubai, he’d been panicked but somewhat put together, at least compared to this. This is gone off the rails right off the deep end. Did anyone actually arrest him, or did he break in for this little tableau? How dramatic do you have to be? “Hey, c’mon.” Daniel says, snapping his fingers. “Let’s go, pal. I’m busting you out of here.” armand spirals and daniel gets tapped in to pull him out of it. it's not exactly the maker-fledgling reunion he prepared for.

like a butterfly, i will collect you and capture you by oxmox

“I want to learn everything about you,” he says earnestly. “You’re my firstborn.” Daniel’s chest tightens, but he tamps down the emotion so that Armand can’t feel it. Instead, he shrugs off his leather coat and hangs it up despite the blood drying the collar. It’s a problem for tomorrow. “Yeah, well,” he mutters, crossing the room to get into the kitchen. “That’d be a lot easier to do if you stopped running out on me.” or, Armand likes traveling, so Daniel suggests a road trip. It helps that Armand can’t run away with him if he’s stuck in a car.

there are enough beds in daniel's apartment by sburator

There are enough beds in Daniel's apartment - and yet. Armand invites himself to Daniel's apartment after the divorce blow-up in Dubai. Daniel endures.

no choir by mercuryhatter (aka @armandposting)

Louis checks in on Daniel while he and Armand are having a night in.

tell me it was inevitable i’d end up with scars by oxmox

“Nuh-uh,” he breathes against his maker’s bitten-pink lips. “Nice try, but I’m playing nice tonight.” Armand frowns; this time, it’s truly a pout. Daniel’s heart swells up with fondness at the sight. He nuzzles their noses together- pets a hand up Armand’s bare flank, feeling the warmth of his skin. They’d fed mere hours ago. “I know,” he can’t help but tease. “I know, I’m so awful, wanting to be gentle with you for once.” alternatively, Daniel wants to be gentle with Armand because no one else ever has.

sip the gossip, drink 'til you choke by andrealyn

It's only fair. If Daniel's allowed to hang out and talk shit with Armand's exes, then why shouldn't Armand get to do the same with Daniel's ex-wives?

[sgiandubh]

Poor boo hasn’t seen dad in 2 months

Dear Poor Boo Anon,

Yeah, yeah, same bullshit you've been peddling around for ages. Talking in circles, desperately waiting for your co-minions to validate with likes and comments whatever idiocy you might be writing, without a single clue, ever.

Because you just know, right? And how might that be, pray tell? You people never had any solid inside information about this (and good for Them, for once!) and always gobbled up the official discourse on everything, no questions asked. Coming here to make this kind of unsubstantiated claims is rich, don't you think?

Let's no break with tradition, Anon. And so, fuck off!

[biancadoes1]

To anyone who still has doubts about the Spain pics I‘d add one more thing to what our favorite anon has just said. If this was a romantic getaway those two would want to spend time together. Yet in both Luke‘s story and Antonia‘s pic there is only one lounge chair in use and it‘s the same one. So they are not laying out on that balcony together like any couple would but rather taking turns or A just went there to take a pic. If I was on a trip with my partner I‘d wanna spend time with them and not go somewhere else and do stuff on my own…Also, we are the only ones making that connection and I‘d assume that is on purpose. That balcony pic was only on his story, so it was temporary. People looking at it now without knowing the story existed at some point weeks ago wouldn’t even make the connection that those 2 were there together. She managed to connect it just enough to make a point to a very specific group of people but not actually make a definitive connection, and I find that highly suspicious.

She's trying to fuck with people.

She always has.

And her other minions help her out.

The fact that you're letting a bunch of 23 year old dancers fuck with your minds this much is insanity.

I'm really done talking about her, too. I don't care about the girl. Hope she's well, but I just can't bring myself to give a fuck about her.

So lettuce move on, please.

[oldbutchdanielcraig]

Do you have any DM fic recs perchance....

anon i have sooooo many. here are a few random ones for tonight's reading pleasure:

cranefucker island circa '82 by katplanet

this one's part of the most crazy awesome series of all time, and i'd recommend the whole thing, but this part and specifically the last chapter made me so overwhelmed with DM feelings i genuinely wept and got nauseous. been thinking about it a lot so much lately

love me like you did (i'll give you anything) by pinkmoons aka @armandology

think about the end of this one often and it restores my hope in love and the world and the future to be honest

crawl into the birdcage by englishsummerrain aka @dykemarderozan

i've recced this one before AND I'LL DO IT AGAIN!!! can't express how much this changed my real world view of tv verse devil's minion. and the writing is crazy as always

Baby you can drive my car by Thunder__Puss

to be honest i read this one high as shit in the car with my boss but it was so awesome and enthralling i was like ohhh my god. oh fuck. holy shit. all the way through. i think i felt like i was there due to the quality of writing and the fact that i was high. i would like to reread it and you also should

immortal and life size by anonymous

i think i've slyly recced this one before but i can't rec it enough. we NEED to talk about corpsefucker daniel way more often than we do. and this one based off of a song from luke brandon field's daniel playlist no less. it's crazy work

[desertfangs]

Oh you know they had to had driven to Area 51 and Roswell at some point, that was their version of a road trip. Well, Daniel drove, Armand was his navigator and he insisted they stop at every single gas station to buy candy and cheap souvenirs. And yes to Loch Ness DM fic! Honestly it could even be set in modern times and it would be equally amazing. It’s the type of thing that sounds right up their alley. I think it’s even mentioned that they even visited the Mayan ruins at some point? Imagine doing that at night with a hyperactive 500 year old teenager, god. Every single sentence in that chapter could be its own chapter I swear :’)

Oh my gosh, Daniel and Armand on alien and UFO-themed road trip would be hilarious. Armand wanting to listen to Carl Sagan's Cosmos on cassette, while Daniel would prefer they listen to music for at least part of the drive. Armand making him stop to take photos of the mountains and plateaus. Armand making him stop so he can get out of the car and touch a cactus. ("That's sharp! See, now you're bleeding." Armand: *offers him the bleeding finger*)

Random stops at gas stations for cigarettes while Armand asks the guy working the counter inane questions about the weather, or why he lives in the desert, and suddenly they're engaged in some long discussion about local history and Daniel has to drag him away so they can get to their next stop before sunrise.

And yeah, you know... I'm adding the Loch Ness Monster quest fic to my long, long list of shit I need to write. I think it works better in the 70s before we learn for sure the famous photo is a hoax, but it could be fun in modern day, too. It's one of those things I don't think any of them believes is really there but they'd find it fascinating to talk to locals and people who've seen it and get their stories.

I think they do! They definitely travel through jungles and strange places. It's so true that every sentence of Devil's Minion could be, at least, a long story, if not a book in its own right. Truly incredible work in that chapter, it constantly amazes me the little things I keep finding there.

[flicklikesstuff]

How about rambling about your top favorite Epithet characters?

Uh oh, I’m afraid you’ve unleashed a great beast my poor, poor Anon….. But if you insist :)

Introducing My Top 5 Favs:

AND full doodle page ;)

(⚠️HUGE EE Spoilers below⚠️)

1. Rick Shades

UGHHHHHHHHH. LOVE this man 💖💖 A pathetic and pitiful wizard dude with one of the coolest epithets! My favourite bit of him is that he’s introduced as some creepy weirdo who sounds like he’d backstab you BUT turns out to be a really fcked up guy with no social skills and genuinely really does want friends. I LOVE it when stories twist expectations for a character and Epithet Erased just keeps doing it a lot.

While Rick is mostly silly and used as comedy relief through POP really, his tragic backstory adds in so much depth and the narration treats the horrors he went through with respect. Chapter 8 has repeatedly dug my grave each time I listen to it. I’m going insane with any Rick/Toidei thoughts. There’s so much I could say about how his traumatic childhood affected him so much and how it shows through his mannerisms and behaviour that we’d be here all day. (Oh wait- I’ve already indulged into his character in like 4 posts.)

Anyways, in general, I would offer my soul to the scary magic man and treat him to a nice day at the beach.

2. Dr. Sylvester Ashling

Sylvie was the reason I got into Epithet Erased in the first place 😂. My favourite thing about him is his DESIGN and POWERS. The swirls and cloud/sheep motif looks sick and his epithet showcase in the museum arc is beyond awesome. Like omfg, it’s just so genuinely amazing to look at.

He seems fun to bully, especially with that pretentious grown-up attitude he puts up. But underneath that, Sylvie’s character is just depressing to the point where it’s intriguing for me. The choice they made to quickly grow up and skip childhood? I wonder what made them decide to do that. Despite what he says, Sylvie really just wants someone to talk to and he really does care for people. He’s just scared to loosen up and become vulnerable in front of anyone.

Sylvie wanting friends but having trust issues and not knowing how to make some? Honestly, what a mood-

I got too insanely happy hearing his short little cameo in POP, even though they weren’t around for too long. He was in there waiting and looking for his only friend awwwwww.

3. Molly Blyndeff

Molly my CHILD 🥺🥺!! Her bear motif is adorable and her character arc within the museum is so wholesome and satisfying to watch. Reading POP just cemented her as my top 3rd fav because her inner dialogue and way of thinking hit way too close to home for me. I was so close to tears many times throughout and I just LOVE her.

Molly just overall learning to stand up for herself and making it very clear she’s no longer taking any sh*t? She’s the character I wished my younger self got to know earlier because it’s what she would’ve needed at the time.

4. Giovanni Potage

Is it much of a surprise he’s in my top 5? Why wouldn’t I like this total sweetheart who would lift the earth for his minions? I adore how he has like one of the lamest-sounding epithets but his insane level of creativity makes up for it completely. I also really found his unique view on bad guys really interesting. The stark contrast between being evil but also absolutely wholesome makes for a great character I love seeing interact with everyone!

Hoping he gets some sort of character arc though. So far, he’s still the same Gio we know from the beginning and it would be very interesting to see him go through a struggle or make tough decisions.

5. Ramsey Murdoch

Haha funny ratman. As I’ve mentioned before, my expectations for him were twisted and I LOVED it. My fav character in the Redwood Run Arc because poor dude isn’t allowed to catch a break. Even outside the show within the streams, he gets absolutely bullied by the plot. This is entirely what he gets for being 1 of 2 people (the other is Molly) that have the braincell to question the bizarreness of….well, everything.

Ramsey is an impressively intelligent character who just has the hilarious misfortune of having things almost never go his way. He’s entirely the reason he and Percy manage to survive Zora and he STILL gets screwed over by getting arrested. Anyways, yes. I love his dynamic with Percy being a subversion of the typical buddy cop trope. Looking forward to having more of him in the next book: Sweet Escape :33

…………..

If you haven’t noticed already, this ask led me to go through multiple trials of tests to see which brushes and colouring process I prefer digitally.

Rick’s was my first attempt and it’s just… terribly basic really. I wasn’t used to Procreate at that point 😅.

Sylvie’s was next and after watching basic tutorial videos, I turn to really like the colouring style I did for them. Wasn’t fond of the rough outline though.

Gio’s was the exact opposite of what I’ve done with Sylvie. While I liked how it popped out in a comic-style kind of way, I wasn’t a fan of the solid shading.

For Ramsey’s, I was a lot closer to finding out my preferences. I pretty much just combined what I liked from Sylvie and Gio’s drawings. Softer shading and a smoother, thicker outline.

Molly’s was my last attempt and one I’m heavily satisfied with! :D It’s the same as Ramsey’s, but I added a lot more detail to the eyes, coloured in some outlines and even added an overlay!

The whole trial and error process was so much fun and very much worth it too! X3 💖💖

[nightcolorz]

I would love to hear your thoughts on autistic Armand, if you haven’t already spoke about this! Imo he’s very autsitic coded, and it’s very precious to me as an autistic iwtv fan :]

OMG!!! RUNS AROUND. Yes lmao I talk about this a lot actually it is one of my favorite Armand things to meta about bcus I’m also autistic and he is my special interest🙏I was trying to find some of the stuff I’ve written about autistic Armand but tumblrs search engine makes it near impossible to find anything so I gave up 😭, but believe me they r out there. Even tho I talk about this a lot I would love love love to talk about it some more for u anon because I can never get enough of armandtism.

I first figured Armand was autistic when I was reading the vampire Lestat because when he is first introduced he is completely non verbal and only communicates through the mind gift. through further explanation it’s very much implied that he does this because he finds putting his thoughts into words hard and he considers just projecting them into peoples brains much easier. Armand speaks out loud for the first time like more than halfway through the book, and lestat is surprised to hear him lol. This is super autistic I feel like that’s obvious 🙏 it’s basically the vampire power equivalent of using a non verbal communication device. Armand having trouble with connecting with people, understanding how to “fit in”, and talking r prevailing parts of his character throughout the whole series (not just tvl) which solidified my headcanon into basically a canon fact in my mind lol.

When Armand is first introduced in iwtv his strangeness is chalked up to his vampirism, but it’s soon revealed throughout tvl and qotd that Armand is considered a strange outcast by other vampires. The things he struggles with r unique to him and r not representative of vampires in general. His otherness/strangeness can also not be chalked up to his trauma or his age turned because Armand was also an outcast as a young child. It’s described in the vampire Armand that Armand was not understood by his parents or his community because he was obsessed with and freakishly good at painting. His community interprets his unusualness as a sign of some divine intervention, the priests believe he is a saint or a prophet sent to earth, even at times saying things implying that he is “not human”. Unusually high quickly developing skill in childhood is an autistic trait, as is hyper fixation on an activity/topic that becomes a core identity factor and prevailing obsession. The affects of Armand’s trauma only worsen the severity of his autistic traits. C-ptsd and autism often overlap and coexist in autistic people who were traumatized in childhood, which seems to be Armand’s case.

in queen of the damned Armand is at his peak autistic lol, I feel like this is when most book readers gain that head canon. The Devils minion chapter revolves around Armand using Daniel as a guide to help him learn how to be “normal” and to blend in to the modern age. Armand can’t seem to figure out how to blend in on his own because he is unable to understand social norms of any time period enough to integrate himself into society. Armand is in love with technology and what most would consider monotonous sensory experiences. He stares at his own reflection for hours, he loves kitchen appliances and watching ingredients whir in blenders, cameras, he watches the same movie over and over again and never gets bored of it. The way Armand fixates on technology really reminds me of how a lot of autistic people played as children. He enjoys repetitive, sensory behaviors over “fun”. For Armand this means watching the same things repeatedly, which is a form of visual stimming. There r moments where Armand is trying to understand his world, but is so blind to what he is trying to understand that he goes about his discoveries wrong. Such as in qotd when he tries to interrogate strangers to gain information on societal norms but he only gets uncomfortable glances. Armand is desperate to understand and to connect but he is consistently inherently alienated, whether it be from humanity or from other vampires or from himself.

Armand also can not process his memories comprehendingly. This is part trauma part autism, but autism is def a factor. Because of his repressed trauma induced memory loss Armand finds it difficult to talk about himself to people. This is worsened by Armand being unable to comprehend the aspects of story telling that he needs to be able to tell people about his life. Armand explains to Daniel that he vividly remembers small details, such as dates and weather, but he could not tell Daniel what “things were like” because he “doesn’t know what that means”. Literal thinking, the inability to grasp vague, fiction based concepts like narratives and metaphor, and strict fixation on minor details like numbers, are all autistic traits!

Armand also struggles heavily with emotional regulation. He is described as often having intense and extreme meltdowns where he cries and screams and breaks things. Armand is easily bothered, in tva he mentions that he covers his ears when he is overwhelmed. The vampire Armand begins actually with Armand becoming overwhelmed in public and trying to escape to an attic so that he can be alone in silence. Armand copes with his intense emotions by putting on a mask of neutrality. He is often described as expressionless and blank, uncanny. But this is a mask, and when Armand can no longer mask and his disguise lapses his facial expressions r described by lestat as being so over the top and emotional that they are disturbing and weird. Over the top unnatural facial expressions as well as blank unreadable ones are both autistic traits. For Armand he is naturally overly emotive to the point of being considered horrifying, and he hides this by taking the opposite extreme. Either way, either expression Armand puts on causes him to be socially outcast.

Armand often describes feeling like there is something wrong with him that causes him to be isolated from others and he’s not sure what it is. In prince lestat he tells Gregory that he doesn’t know why it’s so hard for him to have relationships when other vampires are fully capable of doing that. In the vampire Armand he explains to David that he’s crazy because his mind isn’t built right and his senses are tripled so he shouldn’t bother trying to understand him. I rlly relate to this as someone who felt like I was from another dimension as a child bcus i didn’t know the unspoken life rules everyone else did.

Armand is often treated like a child by the other vampires and assumed to be emotionally immature and too fragile and insane to be helpful. Armand says in the vampire Armand that he doesn’t consider himself an adult because he can’t function like one. This could be due to the age he was turned, but it’s shown to us that characters like Benji and even to an extent Claudia r able to self regulate and function appropriately despite being turned even younger then Armand was.

in conclusion, book Armand is an autistic person who was never given proper support or understanding because the environment and the time period he was born in decided to alienate him further rather then work to help him socialize and learn appropriate skills, and because of the necessities he has been deprived of and the horrible trauma he endured Armand is never able to learn to function in the way he was likely capable of. this recessive quality in pair with his autism caused Armand it be unable to cope or self regulate or learn ways to understand himself since he wasn’t given a chance to in his formative years. He’s a great representative of what many autistic people who experienced intense child abuse experience.

Im rlly happy with the shows portrayal with Armand so far partly because he is omg, so autistic. Show Armand shares so many of book Armand’s autistic traits. inability to understand himself or others, fixation on small details but inability to understand the big picture, etc. even his iPad is autistic asf! My ipad is my comfort item that I carry around with me to self sooth, and this is def the vibe Armand’s iPad gives me in the show. Even assads performance is autistic! He is able to play Armand masking and Armand unmasking, the stilted expressions he gives and the blank stares, the uncomprehending earnestness. AGHHHH!! Assad stims with his fingers when Armand is nervous too which is just an amazing touch. I hope the show explores Armand’s autism, because that would literally be a dream come true. Even still, for now I’m satisfied.

thank u so so much anon for the ask this made me so happy 🙏❤️ autistic Armand means so much to me and has gotten me though some tough times. Understanding and analyzing Armand helps me understand myself better and feel more comfortable with how I am. Earlier this year I gave myself a concussion because I was harmfully stimming during a meltdown, and while I was in the emergency room I was holding the vampire Armand and imaging that he would relate to what I was going through. So yeah he is very special to me too! And once again it makes me so so happy that u got me to talk some about it. I hope this was coherent or interesting lol I felt like I was all over the place