#is there even a tag called /copium?

[spilycoris]

I saw your tags, the animation is great and your art style is fantastic.

TELL US ABOUT YOUR LAMB.

THANK YOUUU and thanks for the ask. this is me rubbing my hands like a fly.

my deary my wonderful my baby. my LAMB. moros! i've already went into detail for the name moros a while ago, but. they actually have a second name!

lament! the expression of grief and sorrow. lamb or lament? how about both. lambment (gets a brick thrown at my head) @7-ferrets-in-a-coat was much more big brain than me so i shall put their comment in here

as you can see from this wonderful drawing i have made (:^)) they have tattoos! or are they markings? who knows, they appeared after they beat narinder's ass—much like their red eyes! also rings for their lovely partners narinder and faris (the goat). yeah,,...

grabs clipboard. i do not remember if i've ever mentioned any of this so excuse me if i repeat myself from previous pots. pulls out??? facts??? good lord almighty. err...

they're a cannibal. they don't even need to eat. there's literally no reason for them to eat. they just do because it makes them feel like a predator rather than the prey they used to be. copium? absolutely.

despite that they're very much against cannibalism in their own cult (which fun fact is called the ewe-nion in my canon!) NO VIOLENCE...... only peace... they make sure everyone in their cult is loved and cared for. stuffs grass into their mouths

their earring is meant to reference both the mystic seller (amaris) and faris. moon... red star... PURPLE star... yeah.

knight esque outfit because 1. uh. pushes away my knight obsession. 2. crusader. YEAH THE OUTFIT ISNT CRUSADER LIKE I DID NOT WANT TO GIVE THEM A SURCOAT. it's MY oc and i get to do what i want

i lied i don't have that many fun facts i wouldn't even KNOW where to start. lamb bless

[squidpedia]

HI I’M PEDIA, MASTERPOST AND TAG GUIDE UNDER THE CUT BUT READ MY FAQ, BOY!!!:

Boundaries on reposting, dubbing, and pfp’s?

Dubs and reposts are ok just let me know please so i can check it out (and give credit duh)! Send it to my inbox or dm’s or something, anything, pleaseeee I’d want to see!!!!! PFP’s also don’t need permission, just include credit somewhere like your bio!

I sent you an ask a while ago/tagged you in a post but you never responded

I’M AWFUL AT RESPONDING TO ASKS AND TEND TO MISS A LOT OF NOTIFICATIONS I’M SORRYYYYYY. ITS YOU AND LIKE 150 OTHER PEOPLE I PROMMY IM JUST TERRIBLE. if you tagged me in a post don’t be afraid to rb it and tag me again, sorry for that!

I sent you a dm but didn’t get a responce

I mainly keep my messages open incase of questions/concerns, but otherwise when it comes to just casual chatting in the dm’s I prefer to limit that to my 18+ mutuals. I’ll probably leave you on read otherwise, sorry nothing against you!

I liked x thing you made. Can I make fanart, redraw it in my style, write a fic relating to it, make something inspired by it etc?

YEAH!!!! Flattered and happy I inspired you in that way!! Just 1) credit me and tag if youre posting it on tumblr, I would be so sad if I didn’t see it and would love love love to rb it and 2) if it’s a redraw, try to link back to original post if possible! 3) in regards to fics (wtf. fic writers ur too cool for me) still give credit, let me know, ask any questions and i’d be happy to elaborate on literally anything. If it involves any of my fallen human designs just know they all go by they/them and u should be fine

Socials?

Youtube, Twitter (lurking only at this point), Instagram (not active really.), Bluesky, Switch (SW-2670-2211-5056) (thats not a social but idgaf)

Pronouns?

Anyyyy

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TAGS:

#Undertale Heart to Heart -> posts talking about my designs and thoughts regarding my fallen kid OCs. Its mostly lilac sorry. individual kids got their own tags like #aimee hth but I'm not linking them sorry you have to find those yourself

#Happily Ever After and Then Some (HEAaTS?) -> copium everyone lives au idgaf please let me have shameless fun and be extra nice because im probably shaking in my boots sharing any and all headcannons relating to this. based on the events of uty

#Phantom integrity au -> Narrator Integrity basically. its not really “canon” to lilac lore but i like drawing lilac as a ghost so🤷‍♂️. Ps if you wanna make your own content based off this concept, please go for it. You don’t even have to use lilac, i call it the phantom integrity au and not narra lilac just in case someone wants to yoink the concept for their own integrity. I think that’d be cool

#Kanako Integrity Duo -> kanako and integrity brain conversations. this is more canon to lilac lore actually

#Pedias art -> yuh

#Other peoples art -> you should check them out please 🥺

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OK PEDIA UTDR/UTY COMICS MASTERPOST

(uty comics are highlighted in orange if you’re more interested in the strictly utdr stuff)

Clover’s Memories (ongoing - i prommy)

Hiatus :(

Silence | Memory 1 | Memory 2 | Memory 2.5 | Sound | Memory 3 | Discrepancy | Memory 4 | Static

Clover’s Hat (post revive au)

Part 1 /// Part 2 /// Bonus

Kanako Integrity Duo (really short mini doodle comics)

Reconciliation // Introductions // Ceroba // Chujin

Miscellaneous:

Kris Clover Interaction // Kind Soul // Frisk vs. Clover’s POV // Bedtime // Who’s Your Friend? // Pipe Down // Family Visit // Unwell // Letter // Humor // Gamer // They // Kicked Out // It Keeps Happening // What’s In A Name // i dont think chara berdly and clover should be in a room together (i’ll probably make a cleaner version later) // Banter // Time // Block Out

[fern-writes-stories]

My Star

MINORS DNI !!!!!!!!!

♡ [a/n]; I am so fucked up from S2 still oh my god 😭💔 huffing so much copium you have no idea lads

✧ Pairing: Aziraphale x Crowley

✧ Word Count: 4,781

✧ Summary: Aziraphale and Crowley enjoy a nice day out of town. Crowley has never told Aziraphale that he cannot see the stars. Eventually all of this leads to sex somehow.

✧ Warnings/Tags: third POV, Crowley snake eyes theory, minor emotional angst, fluff, eventual smut, Crowley has a vulva, Aziraphale has a penis, softdom Aziraphale, oral (m receiving), praise kink, p in v sex, fingering, orgasm (f and m), queer sex, foreplay, beta read, lmk if I missed any!!!!

✑ You can find all my stories here!

✑ My request guide is here (and you can place a request here)!

✑ Like what I write? Consider leaving me a tip here!

-

It was a nice day. Crowley hated those. Well, not really- he hated them in the same way that landlords hated affordable housing. A habit created by the profession, a habit that sticks with you long after you’ve resigned. A habit that you can’t quite shake.

No, good days weren’t all that bad, really. After all, they were a perfect excuse to spend time with Aziraphale. Though Crowley again noted that he didn’t much need excuses anymore. Another habit he couldn’t quite shake.

Aziraphale had called that morning and proposed that the two partake in a road trip to somewhere a town or two over, and who would Crowley be to refuse such an offer? He adored driving his angel around in the Bentley.

They had set off at around 10 and had arrived in a quaint little town around noon. They had lunch in some small local cafe and Crowley had indulged in an extra, extra, extra, extra, extra long black coffee while Aziraphale had tried an assortment of the establishment’s homemade pastries and cakes.

Crowley didn’t care much for eating but couldn’t help himself from trying a nibble here or there at Aziraphale’s earnest request. He simply couldn’t find it in him to refuse the angel, and the bright smile he always received for gingerly consuming a morsel of whatever Aziraphale had offered made it all seem worth it in the end.

They had spent the rest of the day mostly walking hand in hand through the streets, Aziraphale occasionally dragging them into lame little knickknack stores or local grocers. Now they were meandering around a small park together, Crowley listening intently as Aziraphale chattered away about some book he’d been reading.

Crowley glanced at his watch when a moment of quiet passed over them. “We’d better be on our way, soon.” He pointed out. “Getting late.”

Aziraphale seemed to become nervous for a moment. “Oh, is it? I hadn’t even noticed. I suppose we should.”

They continued on their lap around the park until the Bentley came into view, pulled up in front of a very obnoxious-looking “NO PARKING” sign.

Aziraphale pulled ahead suddenly and moved to stand in front of Crowley, their hands still linked.

“…Yes, angel? What is it?” Crowley asked suspiciously after a moment.

“I was just wondering,” Aziraphale began, trying- and failing miserably- not to fidget with Crowley’s hand. “You drive the Bentley an awful lot.”

“Yes. It is my car, funnily enough.”

“Well, I have driven it once, so doesn’t that technically make it our car?” Aziraphale argued.

“I don’t like where this is going,” Crowley grumbled.

“Come now, Crowley. Always so dramatic,” Aziraphale teased. “Won’t you let me drive the Bentley home just this once? Please? You’ll be right there to monitor my speed, and there’ll be no funny business on my end, I can assure you. I know you take driving the Bentley very seriously.”

Crowley couldn’t half tell if Aziraphale was mocking him or not.

“Ffff… ffffffine,” Crowley all but spat out through gritted teeth. “But you will not make her yellow,” he said firmly.

“Of course not,” Aziraphale agreed, bringing their entwined hands up so that he could place a delicate kiss on Crowley’s knuckles. The demon couldn’t stay mad at him no matter how hard he tried, using his free hand to push his glasses farther onto his face.

Before Aziraphale could point out the sudden redness in his complexion Crowley moved to open the driver's side door for him.

“Come on, then. Let’s get this over with,” he said.

“Thank you, dear,” Aziraphale replied warmly, climbing into the car before Crowley closed the door behind him again.

【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】★【☆】

It had taken barely ten minutes before Aziraphale took a turn that Crowley wasn’t anticipating, throwing the demon for a loop.

“Uh. Angel. You do know that we didn’t take this turn on the way out here, don’t you?” Crowley had sat up noticeably straighter.

“Yes, Crowley, I am aware,” Aziraphale responded carefully, continuing down an unpaved country road.

“There’s a sign right there that says ‘private property’. Can you see it?” Crowley pointed to somewhere ahead of them from behind the windshield.

“Yes, dear, I can see it. Rest assured this property has been abandoned for many years- I doubt it is even owned. Though, I find your comment amusing. You’ve never been one to obey the rules, hmm?” Aziraphale gave his demon a sly smile.

“Yes. Sure. I’ll give you that one, but it doesn’t make me any less worried about where you’re taking us.” Crowley had begun to tap his finger nervously on the dashboard. He didn’t like changes in plans very much.

They had begun approaching the end of the lane and a chained-closed gate was in sight. There was another one of those “PRIVATE PROPERTY” signs attached to the front of it.

Aziraphale waved his his hand rather quickly and suddenly the chains fell to the ground, the gate beginning to push itself open through the overgrown greenery.

“Don’t worry, dear, I won’t get a scratch on the Bentley,” Aziraphale seemed to voice Crowley’s concerns, patting the steering wheel affirmingly.

They drove through the gate and continued until there was no longer a road to drive on, ending up atop a grassy hill that was gentle enough of an incline that Aziraphale could get the car to the top. When they stopped and Aziraphale put the car into park, Crowley looked at his watch again.

“Angel, I don’t know what you’re planning, but if we don’t leave soon we’ll be driving home in the dark. I know you don’t like it very much when we drive at night.” Crowley looked up to see that Aziraphale was fiddling anxiously with his hands.

“I know, dear. I do appreciate your concern, though.” Aziraphale smiled brightly and leaned over to  Crowley, putting a hand on one side of the demon’s face as he leaned in to give his beloved a peck on the lips.

When he pulled away Aziraphale noticed that Crowley seemed flustered again. He suppressed a chuckle. 

“Stay here a moment, will you? And please close your eyes.”

“Ngk,” Crowley complained, though was too dazed to argue further as he obliged his angel and closed his eyes.

“And no peeking!” Aziraphale added, and Crowley heard as he exited the car and his footsteps began to trail away.

Some amount of time had passed before Crowley was jolted awake by the passenger side door opening. He caught himself before he could fall out of the car, thankfully.

“Darling, were you asleep?” Aziraphale asked. “I wasn’t gone more than five minutes.”

“Nonsense,” Crowley snapped. “Just caught me off guard, is all.”

Aziraphale tried to hide a playful smile behind his next words. “Well, come on, then.”

Crowley stepped out of the car finally and closed the door behind him, taking a moment to stretch his stiff limbs in the dusk air.

“Right, then, what is it you wanted us out here for, angel-?” Crowley stopped short once he’d laid eyes on what was ahead of him.

Aziraphale was standing beside a large picnic blanket that had been set out- tartan, of course- with a picnic basket and a couple of wine glasses laid out by battery-powered candlelight.

“Oh.”

“Is it too much?” Aziraphale had begun to fret. “I can miracle it away if you’d like,” he added quickly.

Crowley stood still for a moment, stunned.

“Oh, you don’t like it, do you? I’m terribly sorry, my dear. I just thought that it was such a nice day and it was supposed to be a clear night as well, I imagined that maybe we could do some stargazing and look for those odd star patterns that the humans had made up- oh, what are they called?” Aziraphale had started muttering to himself in a tizzy.

“Constellations,” Crowley added suddenly, causing Aziraphale to fall silent.

Aziraphale walked tentatively closer to the demon. “Yes, well, I know how much you love your stars… and I know they are often obscured by the city smog and light pollution, so I thought that… maybe… you would have liked to come out here to see them. With me.”

He reached out to take Crowley’s hands.

“But if you’d rather we go home then I do not mind.” He smiled softly, almost apologetically, and Crowley faltered for a moment.

Crowley glanced up at the night sky. It was dark. Like it always was. Dark and empty. Save for the moon, ever-present and mocking him with every night that passed.

He looked back down to Aziraphale, meeting his gaze. How could he tell him without breaking his heart? Crowley knew that his angel would feel terribly bad. Not just about the botched date idea. About how Crowley had been denied the beauty of the stars he had created. All these years and Aziraphale had never known.

At least he would understand why Crowley didn’t often like talking about the night sky.

“I- No, angel. S’great. Lovely. Looks very lovely. Thank you for this.” Crowley moved to place a kiss on Aziraphale’s forehead.

He didn’t want to ruin the moment now.

Crowley led Aziraphale over to the blanket and they both sat down, the demon moving to pour them both some wine.

“How long have you been cooking this one up for, then?” Crowley asked, gesturing around them.

“Well, it has been on my mind for a while, now…” Aziraphale took the glass offered to him and gingerly took a sip from it. “And there’s been a bout of good weather lately, so I started planning this at the back of my mind. Scouting for places we could stargaze from, not too far from a quaint town where we could spend a lovely day out. And not to toot my own horn, but I do believe that everything turned out quite nicely.”

Crowley couldn’t agree more. It had turned out quite nicely, perfect, even. He suppressed a sigh as he spared another glance above, seeming frustrated.

“I’m sure you’d be able to see an awful lot more if you took your glasses off, dear.” Aziraphale pointed out suddenly. Crowley realised he had been more or less scowling at the sky and turned quickly to take a large gulp of his wine.

“Come here, darling,” Aziraphale said softly, and Crowley slowly turned to look at him. The angel reached up to grab the temples of his glasses, pausing for a moment, before Crowley bowed his head slightly in compliance.

Aziraphale delicately removed his glasses to reveal that Crowley’s eyes were brimming with tears. Crowley glanced at the sky again. Empty. Dark. The same as it had always been for the past 6000 years.

“Crowley,” Aziraphale began, the demon dragging his eyes back down to look at him. Aziraphale’s voice was frail and worried. “What’s wrong, my love?”

They sat in silence for a moment as Crowley thought, his head held gently in Aziraphale’s warm hands.

“I… I can’t see them.”

Aziraphale was quiet.

“The stars, I mean,” Crowley clarified. “I can’t see them.”

��Really?” Aziraphale’s voice was small and somewhat apologetic and Crowley felt his heart clench. What a perfect way to derail a date- make your boyfriend feel guilty about something nice he tried to do for you. Not a regrettable decision whatsoever. Nice one, Crowley.

“Yeah. S’my eyes. After I fell, she-” Crowley stammered for a moment before swallowing the lump in his throat. “Heaven took my eyes. Changed them to these odd snakey ones.”

There was a small pause as Aziraphale scrambled for something to say. Crowley thought of something first.

“Did you know that snakes can’t see the stars? Their eyes are better suited to the dark but they can’t focus on small details very well. Guess that includes stars.” Crowley laughed dryly, a tear spilling down his cheek.

Aziraphale wiped the tear away with his thumb. “Oh, my dear, I’m so- I’m so sorry. That’s horrible. And especially after you… and all this time… oh, dear boy…”

“S’okay. Not your fault, Angel. You weren’t to know.” Crowley felt bad for dumping this onto his angel so suddenly.

“Why didn’t you tell me sooner, dear?”

“Dunno. Didn’t want to think about it, s’pose. Makes me sad sometimes.” Crowley chuckled again and moved to put his hands on top of Aziraphale’s.

“S’not all bad, though.” Crowley sniffed, trying to recompose himself. “I can still see one star. The most important one, if you ask me.“

“Oh, really?” Aziraphale perked up, turning to look back up at the sky expectantly. “Which one?”

“You,” Crowley replied breathlessly. Aziraphale faltered as he processed what his demon had said.

“Oh! Well… thank you very much, my dear,” Aziraphale replied meekly, pulling his hands away and turning to hide his flushed face. “Though I’m sure I couldn’t be nearly as bright as the stars you’ve created.”

“S’true. Dwarf my stars in comparison, you do.”

“Oh, how you charm me, my beloved serpent,” Aziraphale replied warmly.

“Look at me, angel,” Crowley cooed. He grabbed Aziraphale’s face gently with one hand and turned him.

Aziraphale’s eyes shone brightly in the moonlight, his face flustered with adoration.

“There’s my star,” Crowley purred delightfully. He leaned over until he was on top of Aziraphale, the angel holding himself up on his elbows by this point.

“Crowley,” he chided, though made no attempts to stop the demon as he leaned down to place a delicate kiss on his lips.

“What’s wrong, angel?” Crowley said, pulling away and moving to straddle Aziraphale’s hips. “I mean, I can stop if you want me to…” he teased, though Aziraphale knew that Crowley was absolutely serious.

“Well, I never said that…” The angel replied sheepishly. He leaned upwards to kiss his partner again and Crowley deepened the kiss ever so slightly.

“That’s my angel,” Crowley murmured against Aziraphale’s lips. He tangled the fingers of one hand into white curls while his other hand began trying to pull off the angel’s coat.

“We should really find somewhere more private,” Aziraphale crooned, gasping slightly as they parted.

Crowley chased after his lips, his next words dripping with longing and that of someone whose mind was clouded with need. “Sure. Yeah. ‘Course. S’whatever you want, angel,” he said breathlessly.

They met each other again in the middle and Crowley used his free hand to snap his fingers, and at once they were on the large bed in Crowley’s apartment. Aziraphale trusted Crowley to take care of what they’d left behind on the hill.

Crowley shouldered off his jacket and Aziraphale sat up to do the same, though while the angel miracled his waistcoat and outerwear into a neatly folded pile on the nightstand, the demon threw his haphazardly across the room. Their shoes quickly followed in similar manners before they both returned to the bed, kneeling in front of one another.

Crowley began to unbutton his shirt and found himself with his lips on Aziraphale’s again. Aziraphale had moved forward and pressed a thigh between Crowley’s legs, causing the demon to let out a loud and involuntary moan which he was bound to deny in later discussions.

Aziraphale grabbed Crowley’s waist with both hands and the latter began to loosen the angel’s bow tie. Then suddenly Aziraphale’s mouth was on Crowley’s exposed neck, kissing trails up and down his jawline and back and forth along his collarbone.

“Ngk, angel,” Crowley moaned again, faltering for a moment before he finally finished unbuttoning Aziraphale’s shirt.

“What is it, my dear?” Aziraphale asked, sucking lightly at a particularly sensitive spot on Crowley’s neck.

“Ngh,” Crowley replied.

“Come, now, use your words for me, lovely.” Aziraphale pressed his thigh further between Crowley’s legs and felt him begin to grind softly against it. “Now, one more time for me, dear. What do you need?”

“Y-You,” Crowley eventually moaned out. “You, in me.”

“Now that’s a tad crude, don’t you think?” Aziraphale teased, but Crowley didn’t much care. Instead, he responded with another strangled sound that seemed just as eager to escape his throat as all the rest before it.

Crowley’s hands had found their way back to Aziraphale’s hair and the angel delicately began to trace his fingers along the waistband of Crowley’s pants. His hands eventually met at Crowley’s belt buckle and made quick work of unfastening it before moving to unbutton his pants next.

Crowley groaned into Aziraphale’s hair and gripped his shoulders. He opened his mouth to say something but all thoughts were lost the moment that Aziraphale slipped his hand down the front of what remained of Crowley’s pants, delicately pressing a finger to his slicked pussy.

“A-Angel,” Crowley moaned out, stopping himself from rolling his hips into Aziraphale’s hand.

“So wet for me, hmm?” Aziraphale murmured into his ear. It was all Crowley could do to nod absently in agreement.

“So needy, aren’t we? So needy for me, Crowley.” Aziraphale moved his hand so that his finger could begin stroking lengths against Crowley’s vulva.

“B-Been thinking about you all day, angel,” Crowley admitted, eyes fluttering for a moment at the sudden stimulation. “Like this, with me,” he groaned out.

“Is that so?” Aziraphale teased, his voice low and smooth. “You’ve always had such an active imagination. Would you care to reenact some of your devilish thoughts with me?”

Much to both of their surprise, Crowley had managed to overcome his arousal enough to softly push Aziraphale off of him and back against the headboard. He caged the angel in with his arms.

“Angel, I’ll do whatever you desire of me,” Crowley muttered, his eyes half-lidded and eager.

Without waiting for a response he leant down to kiss Aziraphale’s forehead, then his flushed cheeks, his neck, and his exposed chest; slowly moving farther and farther down with every peck from his lips.

Eventually Crowley reached Aziraphale’s lower stomach and continued to kiss until he was met with the fabric of the angel’s pants, trailing along his clothed thighs and sending a pleasant shiver down Aziraphale’s spine.

Crowley looked up from between Aziraphale’s knees, making careful eye contact with the angel as he moved to place an especially soft kiss to the prominent bulge that was forming between his legs.

Aziraphale buried his face into the crook of his arm and suppressed a whimper as Crowley began to prod the fabric of his crotch with a serpentine tongue. 

Crowley was always like this. He liked to be in total control whenever Aziraphale gave up even the slightest hint of dominance. Not that Aziraphale minded all that much.

Crowley’s fingers snaked up to unbutton the angel’s pants and wasted no time in removing the remaining layers that Aziraphale was wearing, turning back to his erect cock with a certain amount of pride.

“Mm, I’ve been anticipating dessert all day,” Crowley drawled, leaning forward to kiss the weeping head of Aziraphale’s penis. He began stroking the length of it, slowly, deliberately, trying to drive his angel to the brink of insanity.

“C-Crowley, please,” Aziraphale moaned out suddenly, and that was all the demon needed.

Not even a moment later Crowley had buried Aziraphale’s entire length deep into his throat, as far as he could physically take it, leaving it there for a moment as Aziraphale gasped and groaned fervently at the feeling of Crowley’s warm, wet mouth encapsulating his cock.

Crowley hummed his approval when Aziraphale reached to grasp fistfuls of his red hair, feeling the angel’s cock twitch against his tongue from the vibrations his voice had caused. 

Then without warning Crowley began bobbing his head at a steady pace, listening intently as Aziraphale moaned out his name again and again. 

“S-So perfect, my dear, always so perfect,” Aziraphale managed to murmur, gazing down at his demon with adoration.

Crowley, upon realising he was being carefully observed, hollowed his cheeks and used one hand to stroke the remaining length of Aziraphale’s cock, already slicked with drool.

“C-Crowley,” came Aziraphale’s broken voice, his head turning away slightly.

Crowley hummed again in response, feeling his lover twitch below him at the action. 

“Crowley, I’m…” Aziraphale cut himself off with another moan, but the demon already knew what he was meaning.

Aziraphale’s grip on Crowley’s hair grew more earnest as his whole body began to tense, the demon not letting up his furious pace for even a moment. Suddenly Aziraphale cried out in a mixture of a muffled scream and a moan and Crowley felt hot strings of come hit the back of his throat, gulping down every last drop ardently.

Aziraphale was left panting and gasping a few moments later as he came down from his high, the demon slowly beginning to remove himself. Crowley sat up and gazed at his angel with a satisfied look on his face, using the back of his hand to wipe his mouth clean.

“Such a good demon for me, Crowley. Always so well-behaved,�� Aziraphale murmured lovingly after he’d recovered. “Though I must say, I much prefer it when you end up a mess.” He put a hand on Crowley’s chest and pushed the demon back until they had essentially swapped positions, Crowley now lying flat on the bed while Aziraphale hovered over him.

“Now, what may I do to return the favour?” Aziraphale added sensually.

“Well,” Crowley’s throat bobbed for a moment. “If you must know… I’d rather like if you would just get on with it and shag me already,” he replied cheekily.

“What, and skip all of the fun?” Aziraphale complained lightheartedly.

Crowley hummed. “Thought you already had plenty of fun,” he joked. Aziraphale blushed a little harder.

“Well, my dear, for your information, I’ve barely gotten started,” the angel said, leaning down to kiss Crowley’s chest. “Quite peckish myself, actually.”

He looked up at Crowley through his eyelashes and the demon felt his breath hitch.

“Ngh,” Crowley said.

Aziraphale tugged at Crowley’s pants, which were still in the act of being worn (more or less).

“Though I’m afraid that either way I’ll have to remove these,” Aziraphale said, and Crowley spared no time in kicking them off and tossing them to the floor.

“Much better,” the angel thanked him, beginning to trail his hands over Crowley’s bare body. 

“Mm,” Aziraphale hummed after a moment of thought. “I need to return the favour, I think. Just fucking you isn’t enough.”

Crowley felt his pussy throb at even just hearing Aziraphale mention sexual intercourse. He wanted him so badly. In every way, all at once. Though he knew that was quite impossible.

“Ngk,” Crowley said again, though this time it was a much more choked sound. Aziraphale smiled at this.

“Surely you’d spare me a moment, my love? Sometimes I drive myself mad simply thinking about the way you taste, how you feel against my tongue. So delightfully tempting and incomparable to anything else I’ve ever known.” Aziraphale slowly began trailing his hands down Crowley’s body until he could grab him by the hips again, rubbing small circles with his thumbs.

“You’ve been so good for me, darling.” Aziraphale moved one hand to start stroking Crowley’s clit, the demon arching his back suddenly at the unannounced stimulation. “Allow me to return the favour, won’t you?”

“N-Ngk,” Crowley moaned out, trying to settle himself. His freshly recollected thoughts were scattered again when he felt Aziraphale slip two fingers into his aching vagina.

“Just like that. So lovely for me, Crowley. So well-behaved. So many lovely sounds falling from your tongue. Say my name, won’t you?” Aziraphale was cooing from above the demon.

“N-Ngh, A-Aziraphale,” Crowley managed to squeak out, earning more approval.

“Well done, Crowley. So obedient, hmm? So obedient for me. I love making you feel good, my beloved. It’s always such a treat, seeing you like this.” Aziraphale continued spilling praises to Crowley, working him up more and more with each word.

“P-Please,” Crowley whined. “Fuck me, Aziraphale. Please.”

Aziraphale seemed as though he were considering the request- not that Crowley was aware enough to observe this fact.

“Hmm… Well, I suppose so. I’ll just have to treat you on another occasion, then,” he concluded fondly.

Crowley felt an abrupt absence as Aziraphale removed himself, about to complain when suddenly he felt himself being lifted amid the haze in his brain.

“Is this okay?” Came Aziraphale’s voice, and Crowley opened his eyes to see that he was now kneeling over the angel, one leg on either side of his hips.

“Yeah,” Crowley replied affectionately. “Perfect.”

He wrapped his arms around Aziraphale’s shoulders and they both guided Crowley up and then gently back down onto Aziraphale’s waiting cock. Both parties took a moment to adjust, letting out their respective gasps and moans, before Crowley looked back up to focus on his lover.

“You ready?” He asked, and Aziraphale nodded.

“Whenever you are, darling.”

Crowley set a slow pace at first and Aziraphale let him have total control over that aspect of the situation. Aziraphale had also resumed his steady grip on the demon’s hips, aiding him slightly where necessary.

There were barely any words from Crowley past that point, replaced instead by a cascade of whimpers and moans and gasps.

“You’re doing so well, love- perfect, just like that. You’re doing so well for me, Crowley,” Aziraphale murmured warmly between huffs. “Oh, you feel so lovely, my dear. So perfect, hmm? Never was there another creation of god so perfect as you.”

Crowley buried his face into the crook of Aziraphale’s neck, struggling to form coherent thoughts as he quickened the pace until it was steady and fast. He snaked his hands back up to the angel’s head and tangled his fingers into the fluffy white hair there.

“Ngk,” Crowley whimpered as he continued to bounce up and down on Aziraphale’s lap. Suddenly he began to roll his hips with each thrust and they both let out graphic moans.

“A-Angel,” Crowley gasped. “Ah- m’gonna…!”

“Me too, love,” Aziraphale replied, breathless. He dug his fingers into Crowley’s hips and the demon let out another loud moan, coming undone at the action.

Aziraphale felt Crowley tighten around him and came a moment after, the both of them crying out in ecstasy as their bodies gradually stilled from the overstimulation.

Crowley all but collapsed against the angel and Aziraphale let out a breathy chuckle, the both of them exhausted.

“You did so well for me, hmm?” Aziraphale said softly, pulling Crowley back so he could look at him. “So pretty and loud for me, darling. Are you alright?”

“Mrrrnng,” Crowley replied, eyes closed as he leaned into Aziraphale’s touch. Aziraphale laughed again and let Crowley fall back against his chest.

“We need to get up, dear,” Aziraphale reminded him after a few moments.

“Hng.” Crowley said.

“I need to clean you up, hmm?” Aziraphale pointed out.

“Hrrfk.” Crowley said. He opened his eyes slowly. “Thought you preferred it when I ended up a mess,” he added sleepily. He couldn’t see it from where he was, but Aziraphale had begun to blush again.

“Do you mind if I move you?” Aziraphale asked, avoiding the question.

“Ngh,” Crowley said. (“No, I don’t mind.”)

Aziraphale gently lifted Crowley off of himself and guided the demon to lie down on the bed.

Crowley dozed off for a moment and when he woke up again he realised that Aziraphale had cleaned the both of them up (probably using a miracle, he’d thought) and was lying beside him now.

“Everything alright, dear?” Aziraphale asked, reaching out a hand to cup Crowley’s face.

“S’Perfect,” Crowley murmured, leaning into his touch. “S’Always perfect with you, angel. My star.”

“Well I’m glad to hear it,” Aziraphale replied brightly, moving to kiss Crowley’s forehead. “But please know that I am sorry about earlier…”

Crowley thought that Aziraphale was the only person on the planet who could manage to fret over something so unrelated during sex.

“I wish I had known, though I do understand why you did not tell me,” he continued. 

“M’sorry I didn’t tell you sooner,” Crowley said, moving closer to Aziraphale so he could bury his face against the angel’s chest.

“Not at all, my love,” Aziraphale reassured him, running his fingers soothingly through Crowley’s unkempt hair. “I’m sorry for the distress I caused you tonight.”

“I wasn’t upset with you, angel,” Crowley clarified. “Was just upset that I couldn’t enjoy the date you’d planned. I really did like it, though.”

Crowley tilted his head so he could kiss Aziraphale on the cheek.

“That does put my mind at ease,” Aziraphale chuckled. 

“I love you so much, Aziraphale,” Crowley said suddenly, squeezing his angel in an embrace. 

“I love you too, Crowley.” Aziraphale wrapped his arms around his demon.

[siodium]

celebrated my colleague's birthday with lunch at altro zafferano. it's a rooftop bar on the 43rd floor with a breathtaking view of singapore's skyline. my eyeballs nearly evacuated their homes when i saw the price tag on that 3-course meal. as expected of the finest dining. even the tableware called me poor. (*꒦ິ꒳꒦ີ)

i got the burratina starter (chi likes this one), mezzi fusilli with walnut pesto (not green like i was expecting but the nutty flavour is nice), and vanilla ice-cream. there were also unlimited breads for us to snack on, and for me to distract myself from the impending financial damage to my wallet.

the food and ambience were good though (copium).

[girlmetalsonic]

WHOAB NEW TOH EPISODE SO GOOD!!!!!!! BUT ALSO RIPPING MY HAIR OUT PLS WHY CLIFFHANGER

[ranboo5]

The Beeduo Meta

So, c!beeduo is unimaginably hard to analyse for the same reason the entire SMP is hard to analyse, especially in post-Doomsday DSMP when a lot more Offscreen Time became relevant: there are different backfilling assumptions. This is also complicated by the fact that it’s, well, a dynamic, and this fandom has an unimaginably hard time dealing with dynamics, because of “show me the clip” analysis being the norm. This kind of emphasis can be unsuited to dynamic analysis, because individual interactions cannot be taken as by themselves definitive of a dynamic without examining the framework they exist within. 

My aim with this post is to establish the patterns we see in c!Ranboo and c!Tubbo’s interactions, to examine each successive one with the context of established precedent in mind, and to assert the thing I have known since February 2021: the framework assumed by the fandom and the framework that actually exists and makes sense to exist (regardless of authorial intent!) are incongruous, to put it lightly. 

Will be dropping character tags from now on, but obviously all c! and /rp

Disclaimer also that this is very much coming from a c!Ranboo main – I am trying to do c!Tubbo as much justice as I can but being a boober is going to influence how I come at this, pretty obviously

Ranboo will be referred to with it/its pronouns in a couple places throughout, a) for clarity and b) because I want to

Under a readmore because it’s unimaginably fucking long there is a TL;DR at the bottom

Beeduo starts with imbalanced expectations because of the situation Ranboo shows up into and how Ranboo interacts w/ situations he considers high risk. In New L’Manberg, Ranboo quickly becomes functionally the only one in Tubbo's corner in several important respects. They are genuine friends, dgmw, and at this point it hasn't quite spiraled, but from the start the established dynamic is Ranboo thinking he has to care for Tubbo bc no one else will, and Tubbo ending up with Ranboo being the only one who really appears to respect him as president and stand by his side. Even before the cabinet actually has tensions in it, this is a suspected thing, which is evidenced in the manner in which the cabinet’s dynamics deteriorate as New L’Manberg wears on 

Even before this deterioration, this setup is immediately extremely high stakes for Ranboo. One of their first interactions, while Ranboo is still calling Tubbo honorifics uncertainly (which Ranboo doesn't even do generally man is still throwing spaghetti at the wall in terms of how to interact with him), is Ranboo having to talk a tripping-balls Tubbo off a cliff edge while he's standing there high and rambling. Stakes of this kind are not immediately damning, but they can be something that complicates matters if handled poorly. They will be handled poorly. 

This precariousness is also immediately dangerous for Tubbo, because Ranboo is a yes man. It knows it needs to comply, or appear to, to maintain its safety and autonomy. In other words, this is a tendency to partial duplicity and disingeniety in the interest of one’s own safety. Ranboo’s apparent alignment with anyone or anything cannot be assumed to be exclusive or even genuine. At this point he genuinely does think the best of Tubbo and his decision making, but this does not last, bc Ranboo takes ppl on good faith and gets disappointed.

As Ranboo befriends like 30 enemies of the state and is also repeatedly reminded of the danger he faces (the Butcher Army, the armor thing, "be loyal"), the stakes only get higher, especially as Tubbo gets more and more unpopular. This culminates in Ranboo’s statement on Doomsday about how he's literally expecting to be executed. This Is Indicative of the stakes he has been and continues to be living under. 

Tubbo, meanwhile, has had it told to his face with receipts that Ranboo is a traitor... and immediately enters copium central, blaming it on Ranboo's memory issues. This is setting out a pattern that will continue all the way to Tubbo absolutely refusing to implicate Ranboo in Tommy’s death and beyond – Tubbo cannot consider Ranboo to have the capacity to be a threat. This will be bad for both of them.

For now we go into Snowchester. It is important to note Ranboo is actively afraid of Tubbo at this point. The urgency in his mind ebbs some by the time they get married, but at this point he is actively considering Tubbo a more-than-latent threat. The tower scene happens, which is a continuation of Tubbo being ableist to Ranboo, this time to the point of trying to experimentally cure its memory issues against its wishes – people will say Ranboo said yes technically, and it did, but again remember: Ranboo is a yes man, and it is residually afraid of what Tubbo might do to himself or to Ranboo if it missteps. Consent given under threat is not consent, and it is extremely indicative of what Ranboo actually feels about this happening from his initial resistance, his attempts to weasel out of the procedure/leave early throughout, and his reaction after. In true fashion of a yes man who is trying not to set off alarm bells while keeping his head, he is resistant without openly refusing throughout. To be clear: this is not Tubbo intentionally violating Ranboo's consent (nor are any of the other ensuing experiments and/or proposals). This is their heldover power dynamic. Tubbo is not evil or malicious or anything – the two of them just have a fucked set of expectations, and that set of expectations is not going to improve, because neither of them have the framework to challenge it. Even if Ranboo recognizes something is wrong on a conscious level (which he refuses to as part of the strat), he will not acknowledge it, because of aforementioned tendencies, and Tubbo will not recognize something is wrong, because Tubbo does not have the healthiest ideas abt individual consent and personhood in general, because when in any of DSMP history has anyone shown Tubbo that as a priority? In fact, What Tubbo Thinks about a situation has been repeatedly dismissed, and at this point he has long learned this. To the Joker Tubbo this is just a normal interaction, and he continues to see Ranboo as someone who is at least mostly reliably in his corner, and at least mostly reliably his friend (especially after Exile fucked up his relationship with Tommy), so he has no reason to believe this would be a problem. Bringing this up as an issue is a threat to the stability of their relationship and the surrounding circumstances, which is not tenable; Tubbo has been looking for stability this whole time and is not interested in losing it again, and Ranboo is staking a lot of self-convinced morality on the fact that he's being good to Tubbo technically, and also is still extremely afraid of what Tubbo might do if he isn't there to catch him.

(Literally catch him! There is a scene where Tubbo jumps off a roof shouting for Ranboo to catch him, which idk if cc!Tubbo thought he was in character for, but cc!Ranboo definitely was. You do not react with off-trailing closed-off genuine fear and worry to your friend maybe doing a clown in video games. I know my little guy’s voice that was c!Ranboo I know it was.)

In the absence of being able to unpack the problem, they go for the next best solution to this threat of losing stability, which is to codify that stability by getting married. Michael is part of this. We never got a deeply in character discussion for why they decided to adopt Michael, which leaves us with the interaction where Tubbo is (jokingly?) threatening to “commit adultery,” and Ranboo replies that he can’t because “Michael is our son, Michael is our adopted son." This is evidently news to Tubbo – unsurprisingly, because this is the first time Michael is referred to as anything more than a pet.

Again, absolutely do not get me wrong – both of beeduo are genuinely affectionate for and extremely attached to Michael (Ranboo has so much sentiment and love and kindness in his hearts). The aforementioned scene is also dubiously canon at best – I only mention it at all because the essence of it is consistent with the previous established dynamic and with how it keeps going. They care, and it’s absolutely ridiculous to pretend they don’t, but Michael’s ultimate importance outside the (again, very extant) sentimental aspect is as a prop in the game of house these morons are playing because they are so so so afraid of losing everything – in Tubbo's case, of losing everything again, and in Ranboo's case, of failing to be there for Tubbo and prevent whatever Tubbo does.

Including with the nukes! I didn’t forget about the nuke scene! We’re talking about the nuke scene!! 

For those who do not remember the nuke scene, a summary: it takes place shortly after the silo’s inception, before the marriage. Tubbo, obviously jumpy and nervous, asks a visiting Ranboo out of the blue if he wants to see smth secret, and  says he’ll just stress Ranboo out to make him forget it afterward. Ranboo, to this offer, says no, he would rather not be intentionally triggered into situational memory loss. This was, however, not an actual offer, as Tubbo ignores him and leads him into the silo anyway.

Tubbo’s literal world destroying weapons bolster the stakes I’ve mentioned earlier that Ranboo perceives in this dynamic; Ranboo, trying to hang on to what could become an extremely dangerous complicating factor, goes to write it down and Tubbo tells him to put the book away. When Ranboo hesitates, Tubbo threatens him. Tubbo is counting on Ranboo’s memory loss here to be able to trust him, after all, as he has before and as he will again.

In fact, this is relevant in the literal next arc beeduo have relevance, which is outpost arc. 

I've gone off abt Ranboo's ideology 40 million times and I'll go off abt it more; for Ranboo to function safely he needs an environment where he does not feel surveilled/scrutinized, where he is not subject to others' whims, and where he is not expected to be specifically and exclusively allegiant. See earlier discussion of his yes-man tendencies – he doesn’t want to be that way! These are character flaws and he knows it! But he must keep yes-manning for the sake of surviving in a society that will not give him the ability to breathe!! Ranboo is a mf anarchist for a reason he needs his agency!!! 

And you will notice this is not raising green flags for his dynamic w/ Tubbo. Outside of the implicit coercion elements, Ranboo has actual positive motivations to align with Tubbo: he shares Tubbo's desire for peace and stability, and he feels genuinely sentimental and affectionate to Tubbo. Both of them want the same things, because wanting to have a peaceful happy life is a generally appealing goal, and they want to have it together, because they’re friends and care about each other. Unfortunately, they have a radically different understanding of most everything about how to get there, including in regards to personhood. Including what it means to value someone. What it means to be happy. What it means to love someone. 

Ranboo does not want to confront this, but outpost-burger arc beeduo is where this conflict makes him. This is the arc where it is made absolutely unambiguous that Ranboo and Tubbo have a dynamic where neither can love the other like the other loves him, because they have fundamentally philosophically different understandings of what that even means. "Maybe he built those walls to protect me" KILLING ME WOULD HURT LESS, RANBOOLIVE 

(While we are here, and I am getting a glass of water to calm down, re: the love point: the romanticity, platonicity, queerplatonicity, etc. of it is not the relevant part the point is that it's philosophically in com fucking patible. Are we clear. Are we clear this is not relevant discourse. Good. Okay)

Ranboo is suffering increasing confusion and confabulation and stress as the arc goes on, almost certainly bc he is again in a political situation; he makes explicit that this is another instance of it "happening again", like he did at the worst parts of his spirals irt his situation in New L’Manberg. Tubbo is not the only factor in this; Ranboo has complicated dynamics w/ Quackity and the cookieduo (Ranboo and Slime) arc is also relevant, but Tubbo is Ranboo's first priority and Ranboo is putting his brain thru the blender for him! We do not see him in a comparable consistent state like this at any point except New L’Manberg! Ranboo is fucked up in outpost arc!! And Tubbo obviously is too; the entire arc is about his lash-out and he is obviously paranoid doing it. And both of these only make it clear that the unbalanced expectations the whole dynamic was built on, of reliance on Ranboo as specially in Tubbo’s corner, are still fucking there

Ranboo’s behavior is extremely worth scrutinizing here. When Q sends Fundy and I am pretty sure Foolish? to go check out the outpost and they trash it on the way there, Ranboo cleans it up (and leaves threats, which is not a Hinged Action and is something he knows is self-compromising, which goes to show his state of mind) w/ the explicit motivation of keeping it from Tubbo. Ranboo talks to Quackity abt Tubbo and repeatedly makes excuses abt how Tubbo is neurodivergent and a minor, and sure, it says the same thing about itself, but then it continues saying similar shit to rationalize Tubbo's behavior on its own. Ranboo has very expressed interest in portraying Tubbo, both to any audience it has AND to itself, as someone who is not responsible for his actions, because he’s Going Through A Lot, and it has been doing that since the mention of the experiments/tower scene in character.

Tubbo has to cling to the idea that Ranboo's treasonous tendencies are tied to his memory loss. Ranboo has to cling to the idea that Tubbo’s erratic and violent behavior all doesn't really matter bc Tubbo is ~ twaumatized ~, because he “has a lot of problems,” and they both have to cling to their ableist copium, because if they don’t, then each has to admit that his husband would hurt him, and in fact has.

Outpost arc is also where we get "you'd tell me if I was a bad person right" "yeah I’d tell you if you step out of line" – I talk about it in connection to the things I’ve discussed earlier more in depth here, but further: it’s extra chilling when you consider 1) Ranboo does not genuinely concur with Tubbo's philosophies, is not kept safe by them and he knows that when in his right state of mind as evidenced by his active ever-present weaseling-out-of-this maneuvers; 2) that Ranboo is demonstrably extremely good at aforesaid weaseling; and 3) that he is extremely ideologically critical and fiercely independent and arrogant, all the time! And this is the evidence point for what I say in the tags of that ask: Tubbo is the closest on the server to come to ever having control over Ranboo ideologically

Ranboo is so good at 5D chess. Ranboo outmaneuvered Wilbur and Quackity and Dream. Ranboo, increasingly freely, is able to disagree and bring up concerns to Phil and Techno (not fully obv but more than everyone else he talks to lmao), whom broadly he agrees with and has seen the benefit of the philosophies of, but still doesn’t think are Fully Correct, because he doesn’t think that about anyone but himself. But with Tubbo, Ranboo conceded so much that he could have lost the game if Tubbo hadn't proceeded to fold during the burger arc. And Tubbo didn't even know! He didn't even realize anything was off!! 

That fold is the next relevant point in this torrid saga. Tubbo reaches a breaking pt with Wilbur's return; Ranboo gets even more visibly freaked out at all times bc of the complicating situation; it’s here when we get the conversation where Tubbo talks abt the outpost and having signed it over. 

This hits Ranboo in a way Tubbo is going to miss, because, again, when has anyone on the DSMP given Tubbo a precedent for caring about that? He has literally 0 example reason to consider all the work™ that any individual put into a project as far as he’s concerned that’s not going to work. Ranboo, unfortunately, not only does, but also has RSD. This already hurts. And then Tubbo makes the to-him extremely innocuous statement that yeah, now that he has a job and a faction and a direction that he isn't buckling under the weight of losing, he's finally happy

Ranboo, who is extremely dubious abt LNV's labor conditions anyway, fully hears that Tubbo never needed him. Tubbo is finally happy in service to the exact construct that Ranboo has repeated concrete evidence fucks himself and everyone around him, Tubbo included, up. Ranboo hears that he has been soundly cucked by the concept of sides, to put it a little facetiously. He has been checkmate liberals’d.

(This, understandably, does nothing for his mental state.)

And before I continue I must mention again: Ranboo and Tubbo do care about each other. They do legitimately want the best for each other. They have legitimately bonded, and are genuine friends (&c). 

But you also have to remember that Ranboo is extremely calculating, and if you’ll also recall, he is still in a high stakes and high delicacy political situation where he has to be making a lot of those calculations. Now, he's just heard that he was never needed for one of his primary goals. Yes, this hurts, but it carries an important second significance to those calculations: if keeping Tubbo stable was never Ranboo’s doing, this is a reason to deprioritize it.

And that is how we go into Hitting on Sixteen/The Wilbur Van. That is why Ranboo is able to snap at Tubbo in Ho16/TWV. The sheer contrast between the "I'll tell you if you step out of line" agreement and Ranboo dismissing and yelling at Tubbo in this is the biggest and clearest indicator – and the deciding difference is that in Ho16, Ranboo has the goddamn burger van interaction in his information bank, the one where Ranboo was told that his concerns were useless and could be deprioritized. He has been functionally dismissed from his post – he no longer has to worry about appearing good and trustworthy and respectful to Tubbo, and with greater things hanging over his head than maintaining those appearances, he goes full mask off. He prioritizes mitigating Wilbur over mitigating Tubbo in that scene, and he feels bad about it bc he likes Tubbo, and he feels bad for yelling at him, especially considering he is lying – dismissal of everyone who isn’t himself aside, Ranboo knows just fine that Wilbur is dangerous and doing something harmful! He is lying!! 

But that's the thing with Ranboo. Ranboo will lie to fucking anyone. It will lie to your motherfucking face with full confidence, and then it'll feel soooo bad about it later, it'll tear him up inside, and you will hear about none of it, and he'd do it again, because it'll be another calculated concession. Because Ranboo is a yes man and a survivor and a political agenda haver and is balancing like 478363 conflicting priorities at any given time because he has to

So it lies. It mansplains Wilbur Soot to Tubbo (and I do not use that word as a joke I use it as shorthand) and it lies and it can do this so immediately because it did not have to lose or shake a long-standing respect for Tubbo – at that point, its initial wisps of respect for Tubbo had been disintegrated and gone for months. He was never trustworthy to Tubbo – Tubbo put his trust and his reliance in a liar and a traitor, because Ranboo's lies were the only semblance of respect and understanding he got, and it was against what both of them wanted for Tubbo to realize that ever. Tubbo is married to a motherfucking stranger.

Tubbo appeals to a better person that Ranboo isn't, to a loyalty Ranboo never really had, and bc Ranboo doesn't have to pretend to respect him anymore Tubbo gets berated and condescended to, again. Like I cannot emphasize this shit enough! Ranboo was shit to Tubbo in that scene, and even if he had sacrificed himself for Tubbo, it wouldn’t have done fuck anything to address how awful he was in that moment and why it was so deeply such. And Ranboo didn’t even “sacrifice himself”! People made that up! 

Yes, Ranboo's political motivation was in large part that Tubbo, someone he cared about, was being repeatedly endangered and used as a prop from where Ranboo was standing, and Ranboo found that kind of mistreatment of a person he cared for the wellbeing of untenable. He cared about that, genuinely, because he cares about people and about their individual safeties, and even when he hurts them it’s, again, a concession. It’s something he wants to avoid. So Tubbo is in danger and Ranboo acts in the capacity of his care for Tubbo and gets Tubbo out, makes sure that materially his loved one is safe – and then, having dealt with the danger to people, turns around and deals with ideology.

It's not for Tubbo that it kills itself, because Ranboo, again, cares about people. Ranboo killing himself did nothing for Tubbo, and it fucking knows that; Ranboo’s critical eye is extremely good at seeing past the notion that benefit to some ideology is necessarily the same as benefit to some person without being able to draw a clear line to the effects that ideology has on that person. The division between effect on people and effect on system – the concept that the ideologies one live under affect people rather than breathe as them, and that they thus have to justify that effect being good rather than having symbolic gestures take priority over individuals – is the whole motherfucking point of people not sides.

Ranboo killed himself as a symbolic gesture in service to a rhetorical point he was making to Wilbur and Quackity. Ranboo killed himself to win at 5D chess. Ranboo thoughtlessly made it so his husband watched him die, because after saving Tubbo, he had bigger things to worry about.

Ranboo killing himself is, extremely intentionally both in universe and out, evocative of Wilbur doing so because in a sense it was for Wilbur, and it was thought out. Ranboo’s suicide was not nonsensical revenge; it was not emotional protectiveness; it was the callous, cruel, condescending, twisted logic of a man who has shown this flaw in its ways of thinking again and again and whose lack of sleep the night before was specifically emphasized. Ranboo reaches drastic action and violence when he finds himself when he finds himself desperate and alone in the corner he’s backed into, and left with his own mind and only his own mind, he thinks himself into the deranged awfulness of the brainspace he was in when he made the decision. Though the choice itself was likely spontaneous, it was a culminating manifestation of a thought process that had been building for this kind of opportunity the whole time.

Yes, Ranboo is emotional; yes, Ranboo is sentimental; Ranboo does, however, think with his fucking head. He does it too much, in fact, and here he thought with his head into deprioritizing Tubbo, and functionally leaving Tubbo behind while he pursued his own agenda – which is really what he had been doing all a-fucking-long; he'd just been lying about it out of worry and fear, and Tubbo had believed him out of desperation. 

The love was there, but it didn’t matter. What mattered was the need, and the desperate belief from both of them that the other could fulfill that need. 

TL;DR: - Beeduo is based on a fundamentally imbalanced dynamic where Tubbo trusts Ranboo to be in his corner in a way no one else really is - This is bad because of the expectations it places on Ranboo and because of the way that it’s not something that Tubbo can actually rely on - The second Ranboo was no longer coercively held to pretending, everything fell through - Both of them clung for the longest time to ableist copium that dismissed the other’s capability to harm him to get away from the fact that they have already hurt each other and continue to - While they care about each other, their understandings of personhood, love, relationships, agency, and happiness are fundamentally at odds

TL;DRTL;DR: Ranboo is a liar and Tubbo is an auth

[calchexxis]

Hey! Thanks for the shoutout!

Re: Lightcannon as a fandom, it’s kind of a weird story. Bear in mind that Flashbangs & Frag Grenades started pre-Arcane and had something like a hundred thousand words worth of ongoing fic when Arcane did release, and likewise, at the time I started writing, there were less than 100 fics even in the Jinx/Lux tag at all. It was very much the definition of a crackship up until Arcane came out.

Before that, there was very little content about them whether in fic, fan art, or anything else. And what little there was almost invariably was Star Guardian-oriented because that was the progenitor of the ship.

Speaking from experience, at the time there were no consistently updating Lightcannon fics except mine. Jinx was kind of a meme in the community as a sort of wish.com Harley Quinn, and with other more popular ships like Cait/Vi (called Piltover’s Finest back then), Diana/Leona, and of course the K/DA ladies present. Even my own work was pretty sparsely viewed before Arcane came out and people came doggedly searching for cute sapphic copium in the angst-ridden wake of Arcane’s ending.

But that ending changed everything.

I can’t explain how weird it was to see hundreds and hundreds of people suddenly appearing and commenting, then seeing my own personal story tags like ‘Lux is Crazier’ appearing in other fics I had no input in. Even my own personal world creations like the fictional Zaunite language of gutlau being referenced started appearing in other stories. That was to say nothing of the characterization of Lux in almost all of the newer stories being parallel or outright identical to my version of her in Flashbangs where she’s more or less a sociopathic spy wearing a mask of Disney-princess-esque gentility.

To this day, I’ve only ever suspected this, but I can’t help but wonder how much of Lightcannon specifically stemmed directly from Flashbangs, if only because it was, again, the only thing there was to read that was still updating. It was pure luck even if that IS the case, because I had no input on that and it caught me off guard more than anything, but it’s still very weird to think about.

So, thoughts on the whole Jinx x Lux shipping popularity blowing up? Why it happened, do you think it can work, especially with the context of Arcane involved?

I don't actually know the history of that ship, so I can't tell you much about that (someone else please reblog if you have a good timeline!)

I know it certainly bloomed with the Star Guardian skins, casting Lux and Jinx SPECIFICALLY as opposites and bitter rivals who nonetheless come together when it matters because they are bound by bonds of deep affection and mutual need, which, in the context of magical girls which are sapphic as F*** at a baseline, obviously was going to set some things in motion.

Their dynamic also works pretty well just on the trope level. Lux is a optimistic, bright ray of sunshine who wants to see the best and the good in everyone and everything but struggles tremendously feeling inadequate to her responsibilities, and Jinx is a sardonic, detached, self-destructive force of chaos who aggressively refuses to take anything seriously, and whose carefree demeanor hides a deep well of hurt and sorrow.

That's in Star Guardians, mind you, Jinx is... a bit all over the map as a personality across her incarnations, but they generally work well together as contrasting opposites with something meaningful to offer one another.

In Arcane, I have no idea what Demacia would be like, but assuming it goes like it does in the main canon, Lux and Jinx certainly would share some foundational traumas, both of them on the receiving end of rejection and systemic abuse by oppressive hierarchies, and experiencing severe rejection and abandonment by parental and sibling figures.

[ilynpilled]

Fave jaime line?

Well I do like many of his lines. He can be very witty and has the Tyrion esque sardonicism which is extremely entertaining to me. Anyway, this is not my first choice but a post did show up on my feed recently as i follow his tag that made me think about this one in particular again. I think it was some anon on another blog commenting on the “there are no men like me. only me” line and how cringe it is lmao. & like i do agree with that to an extent but i think that is pretty purposeful bc there are more layers to it. Like it follows Jaime going reddit atheist mode mocking Cat for her rationalization of the existence of shitty things and the horrors of the world through her belief in gods and the existence of eventual divine judgment against evil (like Jaime for example). & i do like Cat’s response back of bringing human agency into the argument and taking a dig at Jaime for his cringe moral nihilism that does result in human misery caused directly by his actions. His response is interesting though bc on the surface it is truly pure arrogance and very in character with what we expect from him in the series so far. Cat’s next thoughts immediately state this but she does miss the likely involuntary confession of loneliness (which makes it infinitely funnier) within that line that is also pretty much confirmed after Jaime gives in and calls for her desperately just as she is about to give up and just leave him in the tully bdsm dungeon. Like i do think the core part of that line is Jaime’s isolation. His cynicism and disillusionment has metastasized over the years and resulted in that horrid amorality and state of feigned detachment which put him where he is right now: completely alone next to a bucket of his caca. He copes with his self hatred and loneliness in a very Lannister typical way: pretending that he is above it all and fully distinctive (im not like other girls), a lion above the sheep or whatever ok copium overdose. I also love how that line is then deconstructed and how integral it is to his humanization. He does see himself in others, and he does have empathy, even when he desperately tries to convince himself otherwise. Like even in that very convo he compares himself to Brandon. Then he does it later with the Smiling Knight, Loras, etc. It is so funny like “there are no men like me” *proceeds to provide us with a list of men that are exactly like him, usually highlighting their negative aspects because he recognizes his own flaws in others constantly bc of his crippling self hatred*. Jaime’s delusion regarding himself and the persona that he presents to other characters is constantly contradicted by none other than himself, as usual. truly pathetic man

[khalimaa]

Intro post!

I already have an introduction page but I decided to make an intro post anyways.

Hi! My name is Khalima, most people call me Khali. I also have a summary of my dni below the cut, in case you're too lazy to look at the carrd.

They/them/theirs. Pin/Pink/Pinks is also welcomed!

Aroace Lesbian. I don't feel romantic attraction + only find myself craving/considering queerplatonic relationships with women n all that.

I'm a minor. So please keep this in mind as you interact with me.

Pro/comship blog! I do RB discourse: as in you'll see ship/syscourse like every other post but it's mostly a [blank] is valid kind of thing.

Personally monogamous but currently in a polyweb. In a QPR with @maddie-kakes109-blog!

DID system host! Soma, a co-host who's more frequent on tumblr, kicked me out of his account so here we are (crying

Thanks to DID and also me being a total dumbass in general I'm like really forgetful so like. Bear with me. If not: cope ig /lh

This account is shared with my twin and best friend ever Vasilije (AroAce, he/she/ver), he's not as active on tumblr, so he'll sign off with #🫀.Vasil in the tags when he's here.

DNI:

General DNI: homophobic, racist, xenophobic, classist, ableist, generally discriminatory towards any religion (islamphobic, antisemitic, etc.), pro-life, breaks boundaries, rape culture etc.

Under 15: For my own comfort. Doesn't apply to mutuals.

Transmeds/Truscums.

Radinclus/Radqueer: Mspec lesbians, "contradictory" identities, also dni if Transid. Men aren't lesbians. MOGAI/Xenos and NB lesbians pls interact, though. He/Him lesbians too— pronouns ≠ gender.

Zoophiles/MAPs/AAMs or similar branches: to clarify, I'm not against paraphilias at all (we suffer from it ourselves) but pls realize that asking, for example, adults to contact you for sexual purposes can be super dangerous. Real people/things should not get hurt as a part of copium. PLUS: being into minors isn't a sexuality.

Endo systems/supporters.

Antishippers/Fanpol/anything anti pro/comship.

Anti kink/Sex work: This is a SFW blog but if you think kinks/sexwork is inherently immoral, DNI.

Supports harassment: Anon hate, doxxing, cyberbullying, ANYTHING like that towards ANYONE is wrong. Even a total dickwad. Report and move on. Don't feed the flames.

Hates on my likes/interests: Honestly you shouldn't be here in the first place if this applies HELP

[thetoxicgamer]

See S-tier Destiny 2 loadouts with this fan-created website

Players can rapidly share and display their loadouts to their peers thanks to a new Destiny 2 loadouts website. The website, which a Reddit user last week published to the DestinytheGame subreddit, enables Guardians to rapidly display their in-game loadouts, which may include mods, armour, weaponry, and other details useful for creating S-tier setups in the FPS game. Reddit user SmashBoy originally shared and claims to have created the site, which is called blackarmory.app. The name is a homage to a secret weapon foundry run by Ada-1, and the only surviving member. Anyone can view the website, and those who want to post their loadouts can log in with their bungie.net accounts and select which loadouts to publish. Guardians can also add a description and use tags such as ‘PvP,’ ‘Raids,’ or even ‘Fashion,’ which help viewers quickly filter builds and allow them to sort them by ‘Latest’ or ‘Popular.’ Players cannot include seasonal artefact mods or non-core loadout components such as Sparrows, Ghost shells, and ships, but fortunately, SmashBoy plans to add those options in the future. See S-tier Destiny 2 loadouts with this fan-created website: A Guardian uses Strand abilities in combat.While Destiny Item Manager (DIM) has options for people to create and compare loadouts, this site functions differently as it operates as a centralised place for players to get ideas for builds based on what others have posted. For many, this is tremendously helpful as it can be challenging to keep track of what Exotics provide boosts to abilities, what mods are the most useful in PvP or PvE settings, and what weapons will do the most damage given Bungie’s regular balancing updates, such as the one coming with this week’s midseason patch. In an undated update to the original post, the author suggests it’s been a “crazy 24 hours” but that the site is now live for mobile devices. At the time, they said the site had more than 6,000 website visits, 500 authenticated users, and more than 150 loadouts created and liked. The site’s top build is titled Orpheus copium, a Hunter Void build. It leverages the Shadowshot: Deadfall Super ability and the Orpheus Rig Exotic leg armour, providing energy for targets tethered by Deadfall anchors. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zr70cyLnO8k If you’re struggling with buildcrafting in Bungie’s popular multiplayer game, check out our Destiny 2 subclass guide to get an overview of the differences in character archetypes before heading to the Black Armory site. You’ll also want to see our guide to Destiny 2 Lightfall Exotics to see how to incorporate them to develop the most powerful builds of the season. Read the full article

[tuixlaa]

Except it's not even the manga writer said it's a what if. They had to say her age multiple times now because the backlash was so big but can't even be bothered to edit in tits for your 12 year old queen. It's not trending ever because Shitrise realized you n your band of braindead idiots are a vocal minority and they shouldn't of picked this trash up. Oh btw how's that Canon love story goi- Oh wait that's right y'all got a bunch of images of an 8 year old in a guide book that has to steal motifs from every other couple because anything else would get them fined and how's Rumiko's acknowledgment of it- oh that's right "Inuyasha for me is completed and finished. Sesshomaru is a guardian not lover"

Your Canon was so shit it got the first season director fired and set the stage for recons so blatant it's rewriting the original series over again for the second time.

Cry more and keep begging for scraps of a deadbeat broke bozo who gave such little shit for his so called lover he left her ass at her grandma's house after birth. His mama in your Canon don't even want his ass.

Imagine being so stupid and crying your totally real ship is Canon in a tag on a dead website like you're a badass when not even the parent company gives a shit anymore and is doing everything to retconned it. The copium is real.

Haters be like we hate yashahime we hate sessrin but they post about them and watch anime like crazy seriously guys get a life or a doctor because you have a very dangerous obsession..or you know what..go to Kagura's grave to get some solace