#is my brain trying to say something or
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I cheated on Ryuzo last night by dreaming about Genichiro Ashina lmao. What the heck happened.
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Signature. We're good.
#charles leclerc#charlesleclercedit#cl supersonique docu#i could watch him do mundane tasks for hours. idk what that says about me but there you go#i’ll try to gif other bits of this docu later. i was fighting for my life trying to record as much of it as i could#on a crappy livestream that kept buffering#sorry this is such a random scene but like. something in my brain went ‼️ at this#that’s him filling out the paperwork before his pre-season checkup w the team doctor. during which he finds out he’s in fact expecting#TO ME. that’s my bean au truth 😭#*#*mine: gif
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I am a good person. I am a powerful person, I don't believe in evil. I think that evil is an idea created by others to avoid dealing with their own nature. I understand my own nature, good and evil have nothing to do with it.
#this is specifically post canon in a way idk how to articulate and also pertains to super specific headcanons idk how to articulate either.#I'm normal. I'm normal . I'm normal#The implications of Tommy becoming gman didn't do anything to my brain chemistry it's like fine. I'm like. Normal.#[LIE DETECTED]#SORRY . YOU CAN TRY AND ASK ME ABOUT IT BUT ILL PROBABLY JUST. MAKE NOISES AND GESTURE VAUGELY#it's so fucked. It's so fucked up. Oh my god#tommy coolatta#benry#benrey#hlvrai#half life vr ai#half life vr but the ai is self aware#...#tomrey#..........#CAUSE LIKE. OK. its implied gman does Something with Benry at the end of hlvrai. I think he's in some form of stasis like gordon.#do you guys remember. Holly's benry stream. Yeag#BUT LIKE... OKAY.... with Tommy being gman this is again not just some creep keeping anyone in stasis. It's TOMMY.#It's TOMMY and those are his FRIENDS yknow.#Is he protecting benry? Is he protecting everyone else from benry? WHOS TO SAY . who's to say.#I don't knowwwwwwwwwwwww#ouuighhghhh#This could be a companion piece to the Tommy & Gordon one I did months ago. Aoughhh#My art
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Remember: The burning sensation is part of the process.
#Mouthwashing#blood#body horror#Emphasizing here that this is in reference to a media and character and not a cry for help on my end.#Mouthwashing is one of those games that tickles my brain and checks all the boxes for my niche interests -#-but it wasn't something that got the silly comic part in my cortex firing up. My analysis brain is eating well though!#What said...It is impossible for me to see this scene and not say out loud: “Me in the middle of my work day".#While there is a lot more going on with curly I personally resonated a lot with his struggles with burnout.#Burnout feels like mouthwash to me. That you keep rinsing out your mouth trying to get rid of the rotting smell#but it's just surface level solutions. The real cure requires something far more significant to actually make a difference.#The job 'is hard' and 'everyone struggles'. It's part of the process right? You're tired? Anxious? Depressed? Us too! Chin up!#Actually I resonated with a lot of things within Curly (this is a curly positive space - he's not perfect. He's just human).#One thing being his desire to see the good in people and believe in their potential.#Because here's the thing. Some people truly do just need someone in their corner who stands by them so they can grow and improve.#And some people will take advantage of your kindness. You focus so much on their humanity while you stop being a person to them.#The horrifically toxic relationship persists because Curly tries to see the bigger picture and believes in the good within.#Anyone who has lived through constantly trying to reframe the hurt as something else knows-#-just how many excuses your brain will make to avoid cognitive dissonance. It's human psychology.#Jimmy sucks so bad. But we the audience have the privilege of not having years of baggage associating him in our minds as 'friend'.
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Never looking at hands ever again, ugh, fingers should all explode. ANYWAYS: GET REDEEMED LOSER AU! @avisisisis keeps having epic, amazing ideas for my au, SO I FINALLY KNEW WHAT TO DRAW! Basic run down of the AU is this: Evil Mark (Wasp) trying to make Mark worse, while Mark tries making Wasp better. They both think that the other is the weakest version of themselves. They hate each other, they hate themselves, and cain instinct is set on truly homicidal levels of hostility. Everyone looks on in horror, confusion, plenty of concern, and slight, fleeting understanding.
EDIT, bonus song theme because I can: I am drowning. There is no sign of land. You are coming down with me. Hand in unlovable hand. And I hope you die. I hope we both die. (No Children by The Mountain Goats)
#the brainrotsreal's art tag ✧˖°:*♡#get redeemed loser au#they are so precious to me... wasp my beloved mark my beloved#i wanna say something rlly coherent in the tags but my brain is fried rn try tmrw (used all my power for this art and need to recharge)#invincible#invincible fanart#mark grayson#fanart#procreate art#invincible rotating in my mind#mark grayson fanart#invincible show#invincible series#invincible au#digital art#something about this show summons to draw like nothing before this makes me think of BACKGROUNDSSSSSSSS#U KNOW HOW RARE THAT IS
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How do you draw so frequently???
I'm starting to think I probably have some passive ADHD so I end up always admiring ppl who can just constantly do stuff, it's like a dream, your art is also like a dream, Vasco is also a sweet dream, I really like Vasco, he looks really sweet
I set aside a little bit of time every evening just to draw, it's become almost like a wind down routine for me. It helps if I don't treat it as serious 100% effort hard mode art time, I usually multitask a little on the side, watch a movie or take breaks to do little chores around the house and art just sort of happens if it happens. Lately I've been making mostly personal low pressure feel-good pieces.
#this isn't really normal for me either I'm typically way WAY more shiftless#I've been unusually productive during these past few months but I may slow down sooner or later#drawing Vasco/Machete stuff is nice it gives me some badly needed serotonin and results in this positive feedback loop#so I keep making more#I also switched to different antidepressants earlier this year and I'm thinking maybe they have something to do with it#perhaps they reconnected some wires in my brain and suddenly drawing became a lot easier and more enjoyable who's to say#I'm just trying to make the most out of this creative period while it lasts#answered#anonymous#own characters#Vasco
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heartbreaking: this viral post is saying things you completely agree with in the most irritating way possible
#mumbling#goD#thinking about that one cringing = pearl clutching post i saw a while ago#legitimately good points and the only time i’ve ever seen someone point out the linguistic shift#of ‘cringe’ going from verb to adjective and how that takes the blame off of the people DOING the cringing#like yeah! that’s it that’s the thing i’ve been trying to figure out how to say!!#the insidious shift from cringe as an action of the beholder to a property of the beheld is not only worth examining#but demonstrates a seriously important way our brains can be affected over time by language#that was something i didn’t even notice! sure it bothered me but i didn’t know how to express WHY#and i think it’s so cool to see someone finally manage to articulate smth that’s been pissing me off for years#HOWEVER#my god was op’s phrasing annoying the hell out of me for some reason#just written in such a grating writing style i couldn’t bring myself to reblog it even though i really wanted to
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let's drive out
#klance#voltron#vld#this came to my brain via Valentine Texas by mitski but im not offficially linking it bc i have something dif in mind fpr later#and this one is a faithful visual recreation of the lyrics but not an emotionally faithful one so. i can do better#anyway being taken out to camp in the bed of a pickup truck is like. haha. one of my dark twisted evil romantic fantasies#my country bumpkin upbringing showing through#now you guys know how horrible and wild my unhigned crazy thoughts are...... how unspeakably deranged.....#art#my art#bro im such a fucking faker i will fr get on my soapbox about how often klance fight (even romantically) and then draw the tenderist shit#like 40 times over#so let me amend and clarify by saying this was somehow some stupid shit.#like lance set this up but its because theyve been competing for best date (theres a physical scoreboard on the fridge)#and keith was probably trying to act aloof so that lance wouldnt score as many points#but got so comfy he fell asleep (+15 for lance its going on the scoreboard)#+ lance is abt to sharpie a moustache on his face#mitski
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got this reblog on one of my posts were i talked about being anxious about the future of the zelda series after totk and-
i even went back and unblocked them just to check my own post and check twice what they meant exactly- but i still dont know how they got to these conclusions
i never said i 'want a good uwu ganondorf' (bc that would mean hes aligned with hyrule bc thats how goodness works!!!!11!1!!!), i also dont think of any of the zeldas as 'whores' (seriously, where did that come from?? neither me nor the addition of someone agreeing with me said anything like that??? did they think bc the addition called tloz misogynistic means we think zelda is a whore????? huh???)
its also funny how they say they want zelda to stay a simple fairytale rather than have 'people like me' bc .. one point i talked about in the og post was how the evil arab thing VS good white people media likes to do so much is so normalized here that its simply seen as a simple harmless fairytale trope instead of a big underlying issue in general media and the writers might not even realize it (which is worse) bc the most 'generic' appeal is to people who dont think of it as a problem in the first place, because it is so normalized
(huh, i wonder about what kind of person that part was about .. hmmmm)
(ALSO funny they mention princess hilda as nuanced villain ... like ... wow they are so nuanced about purple haired people!!- like guess why we want a nuanced/less badly/less flat written ganondorf and what he, in particular, has not in common with other villains! its not his hair color! .... or was that point supposed to mean .. look we have one female character that is a villain, its not misogynistic! idk honestly)
(and the classic, "you just call it this/dont like it bc its not what you wanted !!!!!!!2!"1!112!!")
also funny how its 'never gonna be progressive enough' like asking for the franchise to maybe put a little more thought and nuance into their white divine right vs evil desert man simulator instead of making it worse is already asking too much
(i dont know what the last point has to do with anything??)
(also yes totk is racist, like most if not all of the franchise and a alot of other media as well, shocker- you can still like it though, i and plenty of other people are still fans of it, we just wish they did a little more with their stuff and maybe not make the racism problem WORSE)
(also yes the hyrule monarchy is also evil :))) )
(and also not so secretly so either :)) )
#ganondoodles talks#zelda#ganondoodles rants#ganondorf#wanted to search my blog for the post at first and tumblr showed me two posts and their reblogs#i have so many more posts in this tag#the fuck#.....im sorry to all the zelink shippers with a brain but i cant say im surprised that they were one#i could go through every point in their addition but tbh its not worth any more of my time really#needed to say something though bc .....#yeah no wonder nintendy dont have to put any work into their story if thats how some people react to mild criticism of it lol#who are you fighting for little man?#defending the big corporation from mild criticism from people that want the media they produce to be better??#....... in the end i kinda did go into every point#or what point i thought they were trying to make which ... was rather unclear to me#anyway#wild to come across people like that here#only had one other i can remember but they went straight to insults lol#(was there ever a divine prophecy that said only gan can be king??? how was urbosa or riju on the throne then??-#(wait was that meant as “see? the gerudo have the divine right thing too!! samey as hyrule so they not bad!!”#i am genuinely so confused
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more capri quick doodles~
#captive prince#trying to commit to a height difference... not sure but getting close to something#as always my brain says “laurent is not a twink” and suddenly i have drawn twinkaurent...#anyways anyways...capri brainrot still has me on its clutches#my art
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Thinking about Yusuf and Nicolò as young men again
#the old guard#kaysanova#yusuf al kaysani#nicolo di genova#siggy draws#it ain't much but it's more than i've drawn in months. i miss this sort of cartoony style. like a dreamworks movie almost lol#my brain conjured an anime ending apparently and i can't explain why#maybe they're too girly looking but i didn't feel like using reference pictures so i guess they're bishounen sdfghfds#ahh i usually have director's commentary in the tags#yusuf is probably around 23-25 and nico is 19-22? though i can't say confidently that yusuf would be able to grow a full beard at 23#but maybe he can maybe he's just that powerful#they're either very sad and lonely or very pensive. or both. maybe they're longing for something more... maybe a true love#i also dk what these clothes are. yusuf has some good clothes on. is probably flourishing as a merchant but still longs for More#nicolo is wearing... a tunic? but it could be a thin gambeson instead. maybe he's learning how to use a sword#i try to capture their best assets in this doodly style: yusuf's eyelashes and cute ears and weirdly shaped eyebrows#and nicolo's nose and heavy brow and the fact that he has almost no lips from the side lol
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Something something about bachelor party buck and Eddie and alcohol lowering inhibitions and therefore allowing them to display the closeness they can’t normally display with one another
Something something about Eddie saying g ‘this changes nothing between us’ only for us to then be shown them behaving very different when inhibitions are not inhibiting - when the truth of how things are changed/changing between them is allowed to exist for a period of time
#I’m not making sense#my brain is still trying to compute#but something about the idea of bachelor party Eddie existing free of his catholic guilt#and therefore free to be far more affectionate with buck#and something about bachelor party buck being able to ‘recognise’ his feelings for Eddie and sort of embrace them#something about it being a funhouse mirror of reality#idk what I’m saying#gonna come clack type it in the morning#911 spoilers#eddie diaz#evan buckley#buddie#911 abc
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you ever just have a lot, a LOT of feelings all at once about a character and not even remotely enough words or brainpower to FORM the words to describe everything you're feeling. so it feels like you may explode. yeah
#sorry i got really into my feelings about mark hoffman again#the very specific version of him in my brain that i really really wish i had the time and energy to properly share with you guys#saw#well until i muster the energy to explode all of my feelings out into a fic. if you want to TRY and understand#know that my three biggest hoffman fic insps right now are as follows#your best kept secret hoffman. a series of mistakes hoffman. and rushed like a dreadful wind hoffman.#there is a very clear throughline just know i am extremely emotionally compromised rn#thinking about theee fics vs the canon path hoffman spirals down#something something the absolute tragedy of watching a man's descent into madness#the transformation of a man into a monster#and what could have saved him from himself and kramer's corruption#sorry i'm rambling so much oh my god i was just having such a crying fit out of nowhere about this#do you think he could feel it happening. do you think he was aware he was losing his mind.#the script version of him fucks with me so bad. the crazed rankings and the longer hair and him not being well kept anymore#it's impossible to think he didn't know he was deteriorating#fuuuck okay i need to either chill or write a whole longfic rn#i project on that guy so much i truly don't know if i could properly write my vision of him#until i do something more substantial the full extent of my hoffman exists for me and my boyfriend only. they get me like no one else#well ginny and jenna also get me. please read best kept secret and a series of mistakes Oh My God#where am i going with this. i like tag rambling actually this is a nice way to do it without forcing EVERYONE to read my delirium#anyways if you've read all of this i think i love you? feel free to dm me about hoffman and my very specific headcanons and aus#maybe soon i'll try and start writing my fics about this tragic man#i could never say any of this on twitter btw they'd string me up for my opinions on him as a sad wet beast who could have been fixed#if only he hadn't been weaponized first#god i'm too tired to even be as embarrassed about this as i should be. thought i unlearned cringe already#but i've been spending way too much time on twitter and they HAAATE hoffman there#rip. i know it's not that serious but i'm sensitive rn and hate feeling lonely in my thoughts#ok bye for real otherwise i'll never shut up. i might tag ramble more often bc this was therapeutic in a way i needed badly#cat chat
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thinking about how hadestown said No answer will be heard to the question no one asks, so I’m asking if it’s true [what they say], and how black sails said If no one remembers a time before there was an England, then no one can imagine a time after it and how Ursula Le Guin said We live in capitalism, its power seems inescapable — but then, so did the divine right of kings and how fat ham said We just gotta…uh…commit./Why though?/Cause this is a tragedy. We tragic./I’m not and how hadestown said the kingdom will fall for a song and how black sails said They paint the world full of shadows and then tell their children to stay close to the light. Their light. Their reasons, their judgments. Because in the darkness, there be dragons. But it isn't true. We can prove that it isn't true and most of all how Hadestown said It’s a tragedy. But we sing it anyway.
#black sails#hadestown#fat ham#ursula le guin#tragedies#anaïs mitchell#James Ijames#do you#do you see it#the themes#I saw hadestown again last night and my brain is rotating these things vigorously#it’s about how the power comes from imagining a better world a different world#from trying even when it seems impossible#from refusing to take for granted that the world is the way it is#from showing people the possibility of something else#do you see it what I’m saying#it’s about taking the narrative or fate or the stupid system you live in#and shaking it until something comes loose#don’t you seeeeeeee can’t you hear it there’s a crack in the wall
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“Do it bad” - heard it before, I’m gonna be upset at the bad job I’m doing, if I’m doing it bad then I won’t be putting effort in (but still good advice and very helpful!!!)
“Do it silly” - new, exiting, and doing something in cosplay, elf ears, or a fun, silly or stupid hat or accessory or outfit or whatever is FUN!!!
Happy your way out of executive dysfunction! Or even better, do it because you’re wearing elf ears and an elf wouldn’t just give up so what choice do you have.
#Sincerely me who’s wearing elf ears rn trying to do something that my brain won’t let me do#…But it will let an elf do#Hopefully#anyway#adhd#Executive dysfunction#Do it in cosplay because if Howl from howls moving castle can’t do the laundry then that’s just kinda silly isn’t it#(Not saying if you still can’t that it’s bad or something- just saying that it helps for me and I hope it helps someone else)#Idk what I’m doing#haha#But yeah :)#my words aren’t really working at the moment so forgive me if this doesn’t come across correctly
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#fe fates#camilla#so i actually drew this a while ago but was gonna shade it and do more emoji things#but welp uh hmmmm im sick and apparently look like I'm dying#which isnt a problem until i sit down to draw and my vision is blurry and yeah thats a problem#so i just attempted to do a doodle and then failed and opted to apply a tiny but of shading to this and give up#but yup uh after a nice of body aches and misery and trying to sleep and failing#i crashed from 10am to 5pm thinking id just rest a lil bit#before anyone says oh you could have taken a day off you know - i technically can yes youre right#however my brain uses art as a coping mech and i need that coping mech really bad right now#which is why i stopped trying to draw something new for today and just went back to a past thing#im not overdoing it i promise#even if my mom and sister think i look like death walking around
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