#is mean and unpleasant as a way of ''''explaining'''' that behavior

[musical-chick-13]

My God I am so tired of people only talking about mental illness and/or disability in fiction/as a literary theme when they can use it to back up their terrible male faves by saying that they Weren't That Bad, Actually and They Belong To A Marginalized/Unfairly Demonized Group, So You Need To Be On Their Side.

[chobunz]

── movie night monday. ( sjy + psh ) ּ 𓂅 ⋆ 📼

๑ What you thought would be a casual night over with your best friends at their dorm, you should’ve known that they had other plans than just watching movies..

pair: jakehoon ㅊ f!reader | warnings: smut, pwp (kinda), mentions of cheating, threesome, lowkey possessive behavior, slight size kink, objectification, blowjobs, raw s.x, edging, degrading/praise, one face slap, fingering (in both holes), oral (f. rec), yn got that grippy, video recording, spanking, c.m eating, creampie, here to spread the hoon being obsessed w ass agenda | words: 7.9k

a/n. i was getting jakehoon brainrot and js wanted to post smth here since i been away for a lil bit >< btw, i never written threesomes before so m’sorry if this isn’t the best (╥﹏╥)

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

“you’re late.”

sunghoon couldn’t wait to scold you the minute you arrived, greeting you with an agitated look his face. he’s leaned against the door he just opened, eyeing you up and down as his other hand disappears into the pocket of his shorts. you recognize them to be his basketball ones, his favorite and lucky pair of shorts.

“i know, i know m’sorry !” you shoot a quick apology before passing by him to enter his dorm room he shares with jake.

even though he’s supposed to be upset that you showed up a good fifteen minutes late, his eyes fixate on you once more, lingering on your body shamelessly. you’re already dressed for the sleepover, having chosen to wear your sanrio themed night shorts with a random anime t-shirt you owned since high school.

movie night monday; it’s been a tradition where you dedicated every monday 7pm sharp that you, jake, and sunghoon watch a movie together. though, today isn’t monday, it’s actually friday. since all three of you have been pretty busy all most of the week and when either of you had free time, the other wouldn’t have any time to spare. so, movie night friday instead.. ?

you turn around, accidentally locking eyes with sunghoon who’s been staring at you this whole time. fortunately, you’re weren’t that bright so you don’t question him. you barely even noticed that his eyes were on you anyway.

“where’s jakey ?” you ask him, voice pouty and disappointed to not see your other best friend in the room with you..

after he closes the door behind him, he makes his way back to you. he almost wants to laugh at the height difference you two share. he can see the top of your head, well, he would if you hadn’t had your head tilted upwards to look at him.

he loves the fact that he’s a lot taller and larger than you. it does something to him. is he old fashioned for preferring his women shorter than him ? maybe, but who cares. it attracts him, he can’t deny it, especially when the woman in question is you.

“he’ll be back soon,” he reassures, watching how your hold on the strap of your backpack twitches when he steps closer to you.

“he went to take a quick shower. didn’t wanna be all sweaty after practice,” sunghoon further explains and you nod, quickly backing away and throwing your bag on jake’s bed.

he doesn’t intentionally mean to make you anxious. it’s not his fault if his proximity cuts your breath short, but he finds it cute. really fucking cute.

jake’s bed is positioned to the left side of the room while sunghoon’s bed is on the right. their dorm is minimalist in terms of decoration because in terms of mess... it’s the opposite. typical of a man’s room— of a two young men’s room.

it’s not super messy where you can’t even see the floor beneath your feet, but a box of empty beer bottles is chilling beside their mini fridge and clothes scattered everywhere as well as school furniture.

but as unpleasant as it seems, you feel good in their room.

and anyway, they know how to clean, they just don’t really do it. but what’s new ?

“sorry for the wait !” jake exclaims as he enters the dorm, coming in with his used towel wrapped around his shoulders. he shook his head, attempting to get his wet hair away from his face.

“the shower i normally use was broken, so i had to use the other one down the hall and the damn curtain kept trying to stick to my ass,” he loudly complains and removes his slides by throwing them in a corner near the entryway, walking up to you.

“that’s why i don’t pull the curtain,” sunghoon says, always having the best but also weirdest advice. “doesn’t bother me anymore.”

jake cringes, flashing him a dirty look. “y’know you’re fucked up for that,” he accuses his friend, laying his towel on the back of his chair so it can properly dry. “the water gets everywhere if you don’t pull it..”

“and you make weird eye contact with people,” you chime in, jake agreeing with you with a ‘yeah’ and a nod of his head.

sunghoon rolls his eyes as if you and jake were the weird ones when everybody knows damn well it’s fucked up to not pull the shower curtain.

“nah, just close your eyes,” he persists, believing he’s in the right and you both are in the wrong. “and anyway, it’s better than having the curtain sticking to your ass every time someone enters the shower room. plus, there’s a drain for the water, so fuck you.”

you gasp offendedly when he insults you, giving him a tap on the chest to scold him for his bad words. he only smirks at the hit, wanting to tell you it tickles as a way to tease you, but he knows you hate it when he laughs at your lack of strength.

“don’t say that !” you reprimand, staring at him severely and he thinks you just look so cute when you’re mad. it’s unfortunate how he’ll never take your anger seriously.

he grabs ahold of your wrist, stopping from giving him another hit as he can’t help but laugh at your flustered expression. “i wasn’t saying it to you, babe,” he rectifies, pulling you closer to him by the hold he has on your arm. your face is then but a mere inches away from his, the corner of his mouth curling up, as always. “just to him ‘cause he deserves it, but not you.”

you look him in the eyes, breath quickening as his plush lips seem way too close to yours. you notice his gaze shifting between your lips and eyes, quickly catching on to the idea he has in mind. you don’t let him think about it too much though.

“you’re so stupid,” you mumble, detaching yourself from him, putting a safe distance between you two.

you glance over in jake’s direction, hoping he didn’t just see how sunghoon was literally trying to kiss you, but he’s busy tidying up his hygiene products he brought to his shower.

sunghoon’s eyes haven’t left your form, still looking at you with a smug smile on his face, but he stops when his friend turns around.

“kay, so... what movie we gonna watch ?”

๑ ๑ ๑

“sorry y/n but there’s no more soda,” sunghoon announces, looking inside their almost empty mini fridge. that meant it would be time to go do some more food shopping.

“but i need one !” you whined from where you are laid down on sunghoon’s bed, previously sandwiched between them two with jake’s laptop on your lap to watch a movie. “i’m thirsty and water won’t hit the same...”

sunghoon sighs, knowing he’ll give in to your whims. how can he resist your adorable face and your pouty voice ? you’re their pretty, spoiled best friend, after all.

“i’ll have to go to the convenience store...” he explains, hoping it’ll make you change your mind and go with water instead of a soda.

you upheld the same expression, big rounded eyes and corners of your lips tug downward. “yeah ?” you say back, not bothered at all to make him walk miles just for a little can of soft drink. “please, you’d be a sweetheart, hoonie,” you flatter him, using compliments to make him give in and it works, as usual.

“mmh... fine,” he sighs yet again, upset for being so weak with you. you deserve it, but he’s not really willing to leave you alone with jake, especially with the smug look he has on his face right now.

“bring some candies, too !” you ask while he’s searching through his wallet to check if he has enough for all that.

“and chips,” jake adds in, smirking childishly. “oh, and ramen, since we’re at it !”

sunghoon narrows his eyes at him, well aware that his friend has something in mind, but he can’t tell what exactly. “do you have the money for all that ?”

“you do,” he replies quickly, snuggling himself closer to you.

“i’m not paying for your shit, jake,” sunghoon spits back, putting the money in the pocket of his basketball shorts.

“ah, come on, please !” jake groans, but his friend doesn’t wanna hear him.

he picks up a pair of jeans off the floor, knowing that jake likes to hide some of his cash in there. he pulls out a couple dollars, not really caring if he takes more than he needs to.

he quickly puts on his sneakers and brings his phone and keys with him, heading out the door. “don’t wait for me !” he yells back before exiting the room, door shutting loudly behind him.

just as you’re about to hit the spacebar to resume the movie, jake closes his macbook, extending his body over yours to drop off the laptop on the floor.

“what’re you doing ?” you furrowed in confusion.

“waiting for sunghoon.”

“but he said—”

he cuts you off, putting his index finger over his lips. “shut up, will you, princess ?” he smiles when you listen and dare not to open your mouth again, looking at him with doey eyes and pouty lips.

he hovers over you, one hand supporting his weight on each side of your body. he rapidly settles himself between your legs, lowering himself slowly, looking deeply into your eyes. your heart accelerates and your stomach twists, starting to get nervous about what jake is about to do.

he carefully lifts your pajama top over your belly, making you involuntarily flinch when his lips brush up against your skin. he glances at you when you move, but he doesn’t say anything. he just looks at you with his piercing gaze as a warning or maybe as a way to reassure you, telling you that you don’t have to be anxious.

you swallow in a whine when his pillowy lips lay on your stomach, leaving you bothered and hot by just the simplest action, yet the most meaningful at the same time. he kisses your skin, his lips trailing down until they reach the band of your night shorts.

you shiver, swallowing again, the area between your legs heating up as he embeds more soft kisses to your tummy. they are wet and warm as well as intimate and sensual. he presses his plump lips down on you, the tip of his nose touching your skin as he gets terribly close to your core. you’re flustered by the way he explores this area of your body you never knew was this sensitive until now.

his large hands eagerly grip the sides of your hips, gripping hard, but it doesn’t pain you. it cuts your breath short and makes you feel possessed, like he owns you. owns all of your body, owns your emotions because there’s nobody else at the moment other than him who’s making you feel this way. the hold he had on your hips soon shifted down to your clothes that separate you from his lustful mouth. it’s as if it’s searching for you, searching for your core that’s turning wetter as the minutes pass by incredibly slow.

his lips travel between your thighs and you didn’t hesitate to open them for him, not thinking once about anything else than his mouth on where you need him most. his fingers tease you by slipping under the band of your shorts before slipping back up, doing it over again. he pulls them slightly down, but stops ‘cause he likes to toy with you.

“are you gonna... um…” you lose your words, a loud gasp leaving your lips when his mouth finds your bud of nerves, already aching from the lack of contact.

he doesn’t stay like that for too long, stopping when he feels your muscles tightening underneath him, pulling down on your shorts by hooking two fingers under them at the front. “yeah,” he whispers, confirming your doubts.

you feel his hot breath fanning on your skin, locking eyes with him as he continues to pull, bringing your panties along down with them. “like... like the last time ?” you ask in a tiny voice, which makes jake smirk at your cuteness.

“mhm.. like the last time,” he repeats before concentrating back on his task.

he attacks your stomach in kisses, distracting you from the fact that he’s working overtime to use his two hands to get your shorts and underwear off you. it works, you don’t try to resist or fight back, only choosing to bury your fingers in his thick soft hair. rapidly, your clothes find a spot on the floor, being long forgotten about the moment jake puts his mouth on your pussy. he licks a long strip from your leaking hole up to your clit, wrapping his lips around it. he passes his arms around your hips and your legs propped on his shoulders, clad feet touching his lower back.

he nibbles on your clit, suckling on it, making it all puffy and swollen. he sucks avidly on your bud and million tingles pass through your body. you buck your hips upward by instinct, pushing down on his head and gripping a fistful of his hair between. you moan sweetly, jake’s cock hardening in his shorts at the melodic sounds you let out each time he sucks and licks, giving you the impression that he’s literally making out with your pussy.

you imprison his head between your plushy thighs and he likes the feeling of it, he loves it actually. he’s happy to know he makes you feel good. so fucking good. you nearly suffocate him between your thighs, you do this because you’re agitated, squirming around under him and moaning, sounding almost like cute little meows.

his head of silky dark brown hair peeks out from between your legs and your stomach flutters at the sight, your mind numb and fuzzy from a thousand little clouds. he laps at your clit and you lack the words to even describe what you’re feeling, but it’s wet, so wet. his tongue is everywhere, teasing and licking like it’s second nature to him. at this very moment, you believe jake was born to simply eat pussy and nothing else.

he ruts his hips up against the mattress and lets out a deep moan, cock aching from being restricted in it’s confines. the wet sounds your cunt produces turn him the fuck on, badly, dick painfully hard at the way your pretty moans swam through his ears and at the way you shove him against your pussy as if his head wasn’t already completely buried between your legs. it’s a lot for you to handle, your fingers are no match in comparison to his mouth— they would lose instantly. if sunghoon knew what you two were up to right now, you can’t imagine what his reaction would be. you wonder if he knows about last time, there’s no way he doesn’t, jake never hides anything from him..

you two hooked up only once before— while he still had a girlfriend. though, she eventually broke up with him because he seemed to be far more invested in you than he ever was with her. she thought you were a nice girl in the beginning, just assuming that you all had a very close relationship since childhood. but the dynamic between you all seemed a bit too close for comfort than just a regular friendship, and little did she know that her suspicions were completely true.

she wanted to brush off the fact that jake would always post you on his socials but never thought to post them together, hell, he practically acted like he was single most of the time. neither jake or sunghoon put anyone above you, so if someone were to date either of them they were just going to have to accept the fact that you come first, no matter what.

but on second thought, if sunghoon already knows, then why would he leave you all alone with his friend who’s incapable of keeping his tongue in his mouth, away from your cunt ? no wonder why he was so hesitant on leaving. now you feel bad, you shouldn’t be doing this behind his back.. no, you shouldn’t be doing this at all. or should you?

you can’t help but think if sunghoon’s tongue as skillful as jake’s ? as wet and warm ? surely, with those pretty, rosy lips of his you can only dream what they would do to your poor little clit. you moan at the thought, twisting jake’s hair in your small fists, coming closer to your release. it doesn’t take you a lot, a few licks and he has you over the edge. with skills like his, you’re bound to be in seventh heaven really quickly.

so quickly and intensely that you don’t even hear the door opening and closing, nor does your best friend..

“jake, what the fuck !?”

your brows knitted at the sudden exclamation, but don’t give it much importance as you feel your high approaching. your pleasure is soon cut short and you get frustrated really fast.

“no, no, no,” you stress in a panicked state, feeling jake’s mouth leaving your pussy. you pull on his hair to have him back against you, but he doesn’t budge.

“what ?” jake responds nonchalantly, looking at sunghoon who has just entered the dorm with all the snacks and sodas purchased from the convenience store down the street. “don’t you want the poor girl to cum ?” he smirks like the situation is totally normal.

and maybe it is normal. it’s not the first time he’s gotten his way with you, it surely won’t be the last. you’re stupid enough to not see the way your friends look at you, how they’re always undressing you with their eyes or how they salaciously lick their lips whenever you find yourself in a compromising position. they were both huge pervs, but with you they are more than that and you’re about to find it out.

you turn your head toward sunghoon who’s standing beside the bed, a crease between his dark, thick brows. his gaze sharp as a knife, mad at you for being such a whore, but how can he really blame you when jake’s lips are so tempting, literally breathtaking.

“oh, please, hoon— !” you beg, clit throbbing. having jake’s mouth ghosting over your cunt is utterly agonizing, so hurtful when he could soothe the ache between your legs in less than a second. it’s pure torture.

“what’re you begging for, hm ?” he taunts, voice low and husky, making your stomach twist. you whine, eyes watery from how badly you need this release. “can you tell me instead of crying like a little slut ?”

jake looks at you from his spot between your thighs, smiling devilishly with no intention of helping you unless you follow sunghoon’s order. you find it unfair and kind of dumb because if he had come in just a minute later, you would’ve orgasmed by that time. and it would’ve been magical.

sloppy kisses are given to your inner thighs and you swear jake is doing it on purpose. wiping your eyes with the pads of your thumbs, taking a deep breath before adverting your gaze to sunghoon. “please, can i cum ?”

“i dunno,” he responds curtly and you frown even more. he approaches you and leans over you, cupping your jaw, angling it in his direction. “how badly do you want it ?” he whispers, his pink lips so close to yours, you can’t help but stare at them.

“i- i,” you stammer, totally braindead and on the brink of tears. it shouldn’t be that hard to say a complete sentence, but right now, it is. you surely did look pathetic, crying for a stupid orgasm. “please, wan’ it badly.”

“atta girl,” he purrs when you finally say the words he wanted to hear. “yes, you can, sweetheart,” he gives his approval and your eyes light up.

jake doesn’t wait to dive back into you, lips already on your clit when sunghoon let’s go of your face. you both look down at where jake’s mouth operates, slurping up your arousal and flickering your little bud of nerves with his pink muscle.

you whine and grip his hair, tangling your fingers in it. jutting your hips upward in his face, his licks and sucks much more powerful than previously.

you’re brought back to the edge of your orgasm in little time, mouth agape as you close your legs around jake’s head. sunghoon takes the opportunity to insert two of his fingers in your mouth, going deep and pressing his digits down on your tongue. you close your lips around him and you ask yourself if he’s verifying how much you can handle at once. if you can take his long fingers, you’re surely more than capable of taking something else way bigger.

you drool all over yourself and wince at the wet sensation, not really accustomed to it. you moan around his fingers as you rock your hips in jake’s face, the knot swelling in your stomach ripping apart. the pleasure is intoxicating and ten times more intense. who would’ve thought jake’s mouth can turn such a little orgasm into a literal tsunami.

you cum hard while still having sunghoon’s fingers knuckles deep in your mouth. you hear jake groaning at the pain you inflict on him by pulling on his hair, but he loves the pain and loves even more your pussy grinding in his face.

jake unhooks your thighs off his shoulders and pushes them over your stomach. he savors your arousal dripping down from your hole, drinking it like a thirsty man as if it was his only source of water. he makes out with your pussy and this time it’s not just an impression. he’s opening and closing his mouth on you, sucking on your lips like he would do if he were kissing you.

sunghoon retracts his digits from your mouth and slaps the side of your face with his wet fingers, holding your jaw within his grasp. “happy ? you got what you wanted, greedy little girl,” he rasps out, gritting his teeth.

he’s so hot when he grits his teeth. he has this look in his eyes, one that makes goosebumps spread down your spine. he seems mad, upset you’ve let jake get into your panties so easily without a second thought. or mad because you didn’t wait for him. well, according to jake’s it’s what you were doing, but you shouldn’t have started without him. if only you knew you were about to start that..

“yes,” you nod, muttering the word. sunghoon holds your face tightly, fingers pressing on your cheeks, jutting your lips out.

jake gets up on his knees and your heart almost does a backflip in your chest at the view of him with his hair all messy, knowing you’re the cause of this beautiful mess. his lips and chin are caked in your juices. he licks them clean and wipes his chin with his hand, flashing you a devious smile after.

“she’s just a dumb little girl, now,” he teases, bulge very apparent in his shorts. “did you have a good time, hm ? grinding on my face like a deprived virgin ?”

sunghoon frees your face to cup your cunt instead, slapping it a couple of times, making you squirm out of overstimulation. “she sure did,” he agrees, licking your arousal off his fingers before speaking up again. “look at her. no thoughts behind those pretty eyes.”

you want to say something back, but you can only produce a pathetic whimper.

jake is about to lower his shorts over his crotch when sunghoon stops him. “the hell are you doing ?” he scowls at the other man.

“well, it’s my turn,” he answers casually, but sunghoon doesn’t seem to agree with him. “i got her all wet, i deserve this pussy.”

“yeah, and you did it behind my back. it’s only fair i get to hit it first—”

“no…” you grumble, interrupting your friends. they both look at you, intrigued with what you have to say. “stop fighting. i get to decide who fucks me first !” you roll over, getting on your stomach and then on all fours to escape jake. you sit up, flicking your eyes between the two men. “and nobody will.”

“what !? why !” jake exclaims while sunghoon scoffs. it’s stupidly easy to piss them off.

you place yourself over the edge of the bed, your back facing sunghoon and your feet hanging off the mattress. positioning jake’s hand to bring him over to you. you sit on your calves, opening your legs wider and leaning on your hands while jake is placed on his knees, back up straight.

you look over your shoulder and point at sunghoon where he should be. “kneel here,” you instruct, pointing to the spot just behind you.

you smile when he gets on his knees and he grins back at you, knowing your greedy little pussy wants more. two pairs of plump lips on your cunt on the same day ? blissful.

but you should know sunghoon isn’t really the type to follow orders, far away from obeying to your selfish little rules. he’s the one who commands, not the opposite. never the opposite.

“jake,” you tug on his sweats, making him look down at you.

he smiles sweetly, cradling your face in his warm hands. “yeah, princess ?” his lips pursed as if to blow you a kiss. “wanna suck on my dick ? is that what you want ?” he coos, saying such lewd words in a soft, tender voice.

“please.”

he groans appreciatively at your pleading, his cock twitching happily in his briefs. “get rid of that first, baby,” he demands, pulling your pajama top off of you, revealing your breasts to him. “perfect...” he purrs, fumbling your tits in his palms before reaching for the band of his pants.

at the same time jake’s pulling his cock out, you feel your asscheeks being pushed apart and a big glob of spit falling down between them, dripping down over your puckered hole. you gasp when a thumb comes to stroke the muscle, lubricating it.

you can’t really focus on what’s happening behind when jake’s angry erection stands proud just before your eyes. you moan at the very sight, having never thought that seeing your best friend’s dick would’ve been so arousing.

he’s perfectly girthy, his head a cute shade of pink and glistening in pre-cum. not super veiny, but you can sense the weight of it. looking at it makes you hungry, salivating like a puppy in front of a bowl of food. jake was freshly shaven and you love it. his well defined v-line accentuated how slim and toned his body is. a few veins pulse out on his abdomen, going down to his pelvis, and you want to pass your tongue over each one of them.

you open your mouth, jake guiding his cock toward your mouth, but it’s at that moment that sunghoon plunges two fingers in your sopping cunt. you moan out, knitting your brows as he reaches a sensitive spot right away. he scissors your insides, and even if you said nobody would fuck you, you think he’s stretching you out exactly for that.

“shhh,” jake tries to soothe you, patting your head in an endearing manner. “keep your mouth open, baby.” you do so and he doesn’t hesitate to stuff it, moaning in relief as he puts a hand at the back of your head to keep the pace steady.

he keeps a hand around his base to guide it in your mouth and you lax your jaw, letting him bury you full of his cock. you want to reach the end so bad, pleasure jake like he did with you, but he feeds you his cock slowly, too slowly.

you never been more eager, so impatient to suck him off. you wanna make him cum, satisfy him. you want him to use you, use you like you’re worth nothing more than a sexual object. he can ruin you, fuck your throat with his fat cock, you only care about his— their— pleasure.

he holds your head, letting go of his cock when he considers he’s far enough in. “ah, what a good fucking whore,” he praises breathily, watching the way your lips wrap tightly around his stiff shaft, drool spilling down on your chin from being so full.

you bat your lashes up at jake, feeling your eyes stinging. he growls when your eyes connect, his fluffy bangs covering his beautiful almond shaped eyes.

you can’t see sunghoon’s movements, but you can feel everything. his breaths, the calluses on his hand palming your bottom, his long fingers pounding into you, his thumb teasing your rim, you feel it all.

he lays his tongue flat over your cunt where his fingers operate, licking a long trail until he reaches your other hole. you clench around him, a little bit taken back by his obsession with your ass, but still really turned on.

it’s nowhere near uncomfortable, though it’s not an area you usually explore when you’re alone. you keep your jaw slack for jake as he starts to thrust in back and forth at a slow pace. he doesn’t move much, most of his length stays in your mouth. it’s enough friction for him to enjoy, hearing his soft moans above you.

you arched from the sensation, chasing after your pleasure and he groans pleasantly, having his head buried between your cheeks. he curls his fingers in you and pat gently the spongy spot in you, making you moan obscenely around jake’s thick cock. it sends shockwaves throughout jake’s body and he opens his mouth in pleasure, pushing his cock in deeper. he frowns adorably while his mouth ajar, watching his meaty length disappear and reappear between your swollen lips.

sunghoon’s traces your empty hole with the tip of his tongue, teasing you and making you contract around his fingers so hard he has difficulty to move in. he slaps your ass and your whine is muffled because of jake’s cock in your mouth. you unclench and he can finally move in freely.

he pulls on one cheek while he kisses and licks around your rim, sometimes going in just a little. you push your behind onto sunghoon, eliciting another groan from him, angry or maybe satisfied, you truly have no idea.

you’re trapped between your two best friends and you don’t know what to think, mind so dizzy, potentially ready to explode. one feeds you his cock, the other eats your ass while fingering your pussy. how can your brain function correctly in this situation ? well, it cannot.

“so fucking impatient,” sunghoon hissed, now entering a bit of his thumb into your hole. the stretch is weird, but it tingles at the same.

he removes his two digits from your drenched pussy, making you whimper around jake, spreading your wetness over your puckered hole after he retracted his thumb. you feel the dampness between your cheeks, purring when sunghoon brings up more arousal.

he pulls your two globs of flesh apart, coming to lick your ass again. you feel his nose pressing down on you and the teasing tip of pink muscle tickling your tight hole. he almost cleans you off of your juices, leaving only his saliva and the insatiable hunger he has for your ass. your eyes roll to the back of your head and jake sees it, grabbing your hair at the top of your head in a tight fist. you let out a painful elongated whine, loving the burning sting and the stretch of your ass sunghoon offers you.

jake guides the bounces of your head on his cock, doing long and rhythmic thrusts. he groans deeply, the sound coming from his throat, and you mewl in return. his face deeply focused in concentration, cheeks colored in red, breaths shallow and lips dried. he licks them, swallowing in a breathy moan after. he looks delectable, his dark gaze planted on you, never once looking away unless it’s to watch his thick cock entering your mouth at a relentless pace.

you feel digits stroking your rim, teasing a bit before sunghoon spits on it. “maybe i should fuck this tight little ass,” he states as he spreads his saliva, dipping in his thumb slightly. “teach you a lesson for being sneaky and fucking with jake behind my back.” he passes a finger over your slick, noticing how wet you are.

you want to protest, hearing sunghoon standing up on his feet after his scary, but tempting threat. you’re about to pull out when jake pushes down on your head, keeping it in place. “ah, shit...” he hisses, feeling you swallowing around him.

it’s not long until you sense a long cock sliding over your drenched cunt and you look worryingly at jake, but he only smiles at you, still holding your head down.

sunghoon pushes his tip up against your tight ass hole and you clench around nothing, heart beating faster. you wonder if he’d really dare to do it, but you know he’s not the kind of guy to do it the... messy way. he’s just teasing, as always.

“stop whinin’, baby,” jake coos, stroking your cheek delicately. he moves in slightly and you flatten your tongue under his cock. “relax, m’kay ? there’s nothin’ to worry about, it’s just us,” he reassures you and you close your eyes, letting him use your mouth as he pleases.

you finally feel his cock inside you, sliding in your pussy in one motion. your wetness allows him to enter you with ease, making you moan around jake’s hard dick. one hand strokes your back, big palm caressing your dewy skin, passing over the bumps of your spinal column.

“she’s fucking tight, suckin’ me in like crazy,” sunghoon rasps out, smacking one of your asscheeks, making your flesh jiggle from the force of the hit. “acts like she doesn’t wanna get fucked, but that’s all she’s been dreaming about...”

an idea would soon strike jake’s mind, thinking of another way he could potentially humiliate you. reaching for his phone that’s sat on the corner of the bed, he quickly unlocks it to go straight to the camera app, recording a video of you sucking him off— this’ll make the perfect jack off material for him later.

you whine out, wanting to say something, but you can’t while having a mouth stuffed full. “such a nasty girl, aren’t you, princess ?” jake purrs, lips curving upward into an evil smile, panning the phone down to catch this beautiful sight underneath him.

he refrains a lewd moan from escaping his mouth by biting down on his bottom lip, fist pulling harder on your hair. you do your best to breathe through your nose, focusing on your gag reflex and hollowing your cheeks to maximize his pleasure.

“ah, fuck—!” jake cursed through gritted teeth, almost making the device slip out his hand, too close to his high to continue fucking your mouth. he yanks your head back, pulling out of you in an instant.

his cock twitches after he analyses your face, looking absolutely destroyed. you breathe with difficulty, cheeks stained by your tears and chin by your drool. you blink several times, looking back into the camera before moaning out loudly, leaning yourself on jake.

sunghoon doesn’t miss your sweet spot and it’s too intense for you, holding on to jake for some emotional support. you tug the sides of his t-shirt, sticking the side of your face to his chest, crying against him all while you’re getting fucked into oblivion by one of your best friends.

jake can’t help but play with your dangling breasts, fumbling the plushy flesh in his rough palms and pulling on your nipples. it makes you arch your back even more, leaning on jake’s touch and pushing your hips against sunghoon’s.

the man behind you holds your hips tightly, sinking his fingers into your soft flesh, leaving your poor skin sore and the marks of his fingertips behind. he snaps his hips against yours roughly and he seems to never get enough, driving his cock into your wet pussy like a mad man.

jake’s erection stands just before your eyes, glistening in your spit and hard as rock. he sees you looking at it so he grabs it, guiding it to your lips. “wanna suck it, baby ?” he asks in his sweet voice and you glimpse up at him, drooling on his t-shirt, looking totally braindead. “c’mon don’t be shy, open that pretty little mouth of yours...”

you part your lips to mouth at the reddened tip, suckling on it gently. jake hums, stroking your hair delicately, the opposite of sunghoon’s actions who pounds into you with force, using you to get himself off.

suddenly, he steadies his hips against your ass, stopping his vigorous hip thrusts. he pulls out and your legs turn pliant, no longer strong enough to stand on their own without him holding you up. you cry, letting go of jake’s cock and glancing over your shoulder to see sunghoon getting rid of his long-sleeved t-shirt.

“do you wanna switch ?,” jake questions sunghoon and this time he nods, catching his breath.

“yeah,” he breathes out a positive answer.

jake smirks down at you, recording yet another video. “c’mere, baby,” he softly instructs, grabbing your forearm and bringing you to the head of the bed. he takes off his sweats before stretching out his legs and leaning his head on the pillows. “spin around, show me that little ass.”

your form straddles his lap how he wants it and you see sunghoon following you, gently tugging at his aching cock covered in your juices. he’s long and curvy, but he looks less stiff than jake, you suppose he’s the type to get more length when erect.

“c’mon, princess, put it in,” jake smiles and you crane your neck to look back at him, shuddering in desire at his words. “sit on it,” he insists.

“okay, jakey,” you sigh out of exhaustion.

you take his wet cock in your hand and angle it toward your leaking hole, moaning softly once you fully sink down on him. the stretch of your cunt is good, feeling completely full. he twitches inside you, extending his arms to grip your hips possessively.

you moan in unison, jake letting out a long grunt and you a loud whine. he doesn’t reach as deep as sunghoon, but he fills you up really well.

“oh, fuck,” jake curses, biting down on his bottom lip out of pleasure. “go ahead, ride me, baby.. just like that” he softly demand and you oblige happily.

you start doing a grind motion, leaning on jake’s thighs to keep your balance. he runs his palm all over your body, making sure the camera gets every angle, appreciating your curves and the way you move your hips on him to pleasure yourself.

sunghoon grips your chin, making you face his angry erection, his hand wrapped around it. “show me how good of a slut you are, sweetheart,” he sings, tucking a wild strand of hair behind your ear.

his long fingers stroke his cock, but they stop at the base when you tilt your head down, catching his swollen tip in your sticky mouth. he hums appreciatively and passes his fingers through your hair, now wet by your sweat, collecting your hair in an improvised ponytail, keeping them away from your face.

you bob your head over his long cock, stroking the base with one of your palms since you can’t fit all of him in your mouth, your other palm still resting on jake’s thigh. you hear the beautiful, raspy moans of sunghoon, proud of yourself for making him feel good.

he is also smoothly shaved, skin soft and sturdy under your tongue and fingertips. you love the sleek feeling of him, although you equally adore the feeling of jake’s against your skin. you grind and spin your hips on jake, doing little motions that are more pleasurable to you, but he still approves, muttering a ‘fuck yeah’ while directing your hips.

you’re sucking off sunghoon as if you were actually in a porno, bobbing over his length and moaning around him exaggeratedly. you don’t know where this sudden rush comes from, but you won’t complain. surely not when he looks impressed, in total admiration.

“fucking slut,” jake slurs out, pupils dilated and filled in a fog of lust at the sight of a white ring forming around the base of his cock coated by your pussy.

you whine around sunghoon, disagreeing with him, or maybe agreeing. it doesn’t matter anyway with the way you clench around him each time he throws bad words at you. you like how they treat you, as if all those insults were deserved and justified. but they know damn well none of the things they say are remotely true, that’s why it’s so exciting.

you move in slow circles, jake’s hands grabbing and slapping your ass. your juices are everywhere, dripping down his balls and sticking to his pelvis. it feels a little bit dirty, but you don’t think anyone in this room really cares. it probably smells so much like sex and you wonder how long it’ll take for the odor to go away. knowing your friends, they could probably never open the windows just to keep the smell of you in.. you would dissuade them from it, because come on, but the thought secretly makes you wanna smile.

“fuck, that little mouth of yours is doing wonders,” sunghoon compliments, relishing in the praise upon hearing that. “don’t know how long m’gonna last, baby,” he announces, looking down at your lips gliding smoothly over his long, curvy cock.

“same..” jake adds in, voice raspy and breath erratic.

you’re encouraged by that, pleased to know you’re making them both feel really good. you use your full potential and lift up your hips, dropping them back down on jake’s dick. you love the stretch, love how his cock pushes your walls to make room for himself, being so big your pussy just can’t keep his size.

you take sunghoon’s length deeper in your mouth, slurping and swallowing around him. he groans, telling you how much he likes you and your wet tongue.

“okay— fuck,” sunghoon begins, but curses when you cup his balls, innocently glancing up at him. he puts a hand on the top of your head and pushes you away from him, his cock slipping out your mouth.

“i’m taking her pussy, now,” he says, still looking at you even though he’s addressing jake.

“what ? no ! why ??” jake complains, groaning loudly in disagreement.

“because i want to,” he simply answers back, too stubborn to even proceed with a further explanation.

“well, you’re gonna let me finish first.”

as you lift up your hips, jake’s cock pulls out of you, he’s quick to reposition and turn you around, lying you down on the bed where he was previously. sunghoon lets him, rolling his eyes at the childishness of his friend— even though he’s not acting very maturely either.

jake straddles your waist, stroking his cock just over your breasts, licking his lips. you watch him snap a few quick photos while his hand runs up and down his shaft rapidly, all coated in your wetness and saliva of earlier.

“shit, shit— ‘m cumming,” he hastily warns, fingers wrapped tightly around his dick. he was already close when he was in you, so it doesn’t take long until he’s brought back close to his high.

his eyes are blown out, looking at your tits like there’s nothing sexier on this earth. his hips stutter and you place your palms on his bare thighs, feeling how hot his skin is.

“mmh ! fuck,” he chokes on his words, angling his cock toward your boobs. you look up at him as he empties himself on your chest, long ropes of milky white cum landing on your breasts. he keeps stroking obsessively until he spills out everything, little white beads falling from his wet and reddened tip. you look so fucking good like that, he’s gonna have a camera roll full of you by the end of this night.

he whines a little when it starts to hurt because of overstimulation. eventually he finishes, passing a hand through his hair, removing his wet bangs from covering his eyes. his chest heaves rapidly as he tries to regain a normal rhythm of breathing.

“go away, loser.”

jake sends a death glare at sunghoon before clearing the way, sitting down, back against the wall.

sunghoon enters you again, locking your shaky legs behind his back. you gasped when he pounds in immediately, not once missing a beat. you sneak a hand between your legs, circling your pulsing, puffy clit left alone for too long now.

with your other hand, you swipe a finger in jake’s cum that were caked on your boobs, picking it up and bringing it to your mouth. sunghoon watches you eating his friend’s cum and he squints his eyes at you, perhaps maybe a little jealous..

“oh ! hoon,” you mewl, the coil in your stomach tightening from his tip brushing against the sweet spot inside of you and your finger drawing more quick circles to your clit.

you lick more cum off your fingers, arching your back and closing your walls around sunghoon’s long cock. you moan loudly when you reach your high, milking his dick and clenching repeatedly around him, bringing him close to his high as well.

“fuck, you’re s’fucking tight, angel,” his hips snap against yours and like earlier, they steady on you, cock twitching inside your pussy.

he doesn’t pull out this time and paints your insides white in his cum, spurting every last drop he has deep into you. you sigh of contentment, loving the hot sensation of his cum in your pussy.

“‘m so full, hoonie,” you purr and he slips out slowly, looking at his seed dripping out of you as your hole keeps quivering and clenching from your previous orgasm.

he wets his lips, wishing he could see this everyday of the week; you full of his creamy cum. but of course, he’s not the only one to want this. he’d have to share.

“next time, i’m the one cumming inside,” jake says from where he is, catching a glimpse of the white substance dripping out your hole. “you selfish prick,” he mutters to his friend.

later on, after sunghoon passed a cloth between your legs and jake cleaned the mess he made on your tits, you fell asleep in sunghoon’s bed. the boys ended up finishing the movie without you since you were rightfully too tired too join, eyelids closing on their own. they stayed up late at night, playing video games and eating ramen, sometimes giving each other stupid challenges like how many amount of push-ups they can do in a determined time.

they didn’t really disturb your sleep since you were knocked out. though you sometimes woke up from their voices, you went back to sleep easily. in the morning, you woke up with sunghoon’s arm wrapped around your waist and jake coming back with breakfast.

in simpler terms, it seems like movie night monday was a success, though you might not have finished the movie, you ended up making one yourselves..

(╯✧ ∇ ✧)╯

@pshbites @leeechin ♡︎

[kichiyosh1]

"I made it with you in mind"

wanderer x reader

to think he'd end up finding joy in such a childish activity

✧: he ends up being mean at the beginning but he apologizes in his own special way, slight hurt/comfort but nothing major

(I'm back ig? idk :3)

He couldn't believe the absurdity to which you and the young archon were subjecting him to.

The sins committed by the former harbinger are things he won't refute or deny. Indeed such actions musn't go unpunished, but perhaps he's underestimated the extent of the dendro archon's mercy.

Mind explaining what all of this is supposed to be?" he knows, with just a single glance, he grasped what was about to unfold, he just couldn't believe it. There displayed before his very eyes, a colorful assortment of beads lay scattered across a wooden table.

"You've dabbled in arts and crafts before, haven't you? You could say I proposed the idea to Lord kusanali as a way to keep that evil little brain of yours occupied"

'What evil is there to be done in bracelet crafting of all things, huh?' he deadpanned while simultaneously picking up a bead, examining how it reflects the light that's passing through the crystalline windows.

He let out a scoff.

"Have you forgotten who I am? A being of celestial creation, lessened to do recreational activities such as these? how amusing." Pathetic was the word he was looking for. Seriously, do you really expect him to just sit down quietly and start passing beads on a string without complaint to how this is a hit on his pride? It'd be more fitting if you locked him up for all of eternity, but this, this was just mockery.

It was the warmth of your hand that snapped him out of his thoughts. Eyes widened before squinting, but he dared not move, curious to what it was you were doing. You had started to fasten a piece of string to his wrist, gentle with your touch, measuring it so that it'd fit securely, but not too tight to be uncomfortable.

"Who gave you permission to lay your hands on me?" The warmth of your touch was strangely starting to get to him. He swatted your hand away, any more of that and he wouldn't know how to react.

Both of you were now glaring at each other. "Is it that hard for you to accept someone's act of kindness? I'm just trying to help." You could've sworn there was a slight change in his eyes when you said that, but was quickly replaced by an irritated smirk on his face. "I don't recall ever asking for your help, go give it to someone who actually needs it." He waved you off before plopping himself down on one of the stools before suddenly picking out random beads and charms like he wasn't against the idea a moment ago.

With furrowed brows and your mouth left slightly agape by his rude behavior, your face settled on a frown. You were used to the wanderer's arrogance and unpleasant attitude towards people, but there are times where even you are left puzzled. You went out of your way to make sure the activities kusanali planned out wouldn't overwhelm him, she'd ask you if you were doing this out of pity for him. You firmly shook your head.

You simply cared for him, that's all there was to it, but it didn't seem like he reciprocated the motion. The last he's heard from you was a sigh, before the sound of your footsteps slowly leaving faded.

You haven't visited him since. I mean how could you? if he was going to act like a brat while you spent your time there then might as well steer clear out of his way. No, you weren't being petty, and even if you were, you most certainly had every right to be. You nodded to yourself, justifying your actions as wanderer just being an asshat and you being the more mature one in this situation.

It wasn't easy. There were times where you would cross paths when he was on break from his duties (and bracelet crafting), or times where he himself is actively seeking you out, and before he could even call out your name, you're already making a bee line towards the exit.

You sat yourself down, exhausted from all this running around. Another successful day of not coming into contact with the wanderer.

"Doesn't he have other businesses to attend to?" If he had time to be going around looking for you then surely he was slacking off, right?

"As far as I'm concerned, you are my business." Speak of the devil and he shall appear.

"So how long do you plan on avoiding me?" he was standing behind you, face leaning down above your head as you met his gaze from your position on the bench.

You put on an air of annoyance before flicking his forehead, causing him to hiss and reel back from your attack as he rubbed the spot. "Hey! you deprive me of your company for days and now you dare assault my face? you-" you were already walking away, with the esteemed wanderer quickly following closely behind you.

"Hey", he reached for your hand, but you batted it away. It was definitely worth it to see the offended look on his face, but there was a small pang in your heart when you saw how his face faltered. "Who gave you permission to lay your hands on me? don't go acting all buddy buddy with me now." you crossed your arms, throwing back what he had said to you a few days ago.

"ah, you're upset with me about last time." You kept a stern look on your face, expecting for more, but if he failed to deliver then you'd have no trouble turning away from him again.

His mouth kept opening and closing similar to that of a goldfish, but no words came out. He looks conflicted. It took him a whole minute to sort out his thoughts, and with a deep sigh he spoke.

"The way I reacted, it was uncalled for. Like you said, you were only trying to help and I should have, I, it's just the way you held my hand, it made me feel weird." his gaze turned downcast feeling a little embarrassed by getting riled up by something so minor as physical contact.

you don't know that of course, you'd just assume he was really really ticklish in some areas

Would you mind closing your eyes for a moment? I promise It'll only take a second", the soft spoken tone he's taken on is foreign to you, but not unwelcome. You were hesitant but complied. And if he does anything funny you'll make sure to write a full on report about it to kusanali.

You could only feel how he softly held your hand, how he delicately glided his dainty finger in order to tie what you assumed was a,

a bracelet?

You opened your eyes and that's when he leaned in, his soft breath near your ear "It was supposed to be a surprise gift, but an apology gift works too." your face felt warm, and your hand did too (to which he was still holding). Was this the weird feeling he was talking about.

A moment after, you examined the accessory on your wrist.

and my was it beautiful.

The main colors of the bracelet were your favorite colors, accompanied by beautiful white pearl beads and crystal flowers and cute charms. Truly something you wouldn't expect the wanderer himself to make.

You released a small laugh, happiness spreading throughout your system. "Did you really make this?" You were starting to look too happy for his liking, but of course you always looked more beautiful with a smile on your face. He scoffed in order to hide the ever creeping happiness that was also starting to spread across his face.

"Is it that hard to believe? I had you in mind when I made it after all, so if you're going to complain about its design then the person used as reference is at fault." You were just about to complain to him about him complaining that you'd not dare complain about it when he added on.

"again, I'm sorry for disregarding your help. Whether I needed it or not, I wanted to make the bracelet solely on my own so that it'd be more meaningful of a gift to give to you." This time he held your gaze, determined and truthful about what he said.

It seems you had judged him wrong, well not entirely. True he had a unique character, but that's just what made him, him. You held his hand, and the colors from earlier are returning to both of your faces. You held it there before pointing to his wrist, "It's only right I make you one as well, right? that way we'll be matching." You then intertwined your fingers. He was gonna combust.

EXTRA:

"I didn't think wanderer would be that into bracelet making" Kusanali peaked from the corner of the room. He was deeply concentrating on what he was doing and she did not want to disturb. "A little peek into that mind of his wouldn't hurt". After using her skill, a flurry of thoughts from wanderer flood her mind.

'Is this too much? or maybe too little? is [y/n] a minimalist or a maximalist?'

'This reminds me of you, this one too, and this one.'

'This charm is cute, like you. Wait no you're most definitely more cuter'

'this bracelet should be honored to be worn by you'

'maybe i'll make you a necklace next'

'I hope you'll like it'

[fumifooms]

Analysis of Laios’ succubus and theories on what it means - deep dive on Laios’ desires in human connections

Laios’ succubus is a very odd incident. I have some particular interpretations of why it was Marcille, and why things went down the way they did.

We know that a succubus shows what one desires, stated in canon as “an alluring form”; yes often in a romantic or sexual sense, as seen with Chilchuck’s succubus being entirely set on looks and seduction, meanwhile Marcille’s does have a focus on chivalrous noble demeanor as well, showing romantic behavior and personality. BUT with Izutsumi we also see that the liaison doesn’t have to be romantic or sexual at all, either, in Izutsumi’s case it’s a familial bond she craves. So perhaps we can say that the succubus exploits a desire based on connection, in whichever form that takes. Marcille wants an emotional connection foremost(which is also reflected in how it’s a character she knows very well and not a stranger. Perhaps romantic.), Chilchuck wants pleasure(a simple pleasure not unlike alcohol, perhaps such a connection is free of the more risky or unpleasant parts of a relationship, he doesn’t have to worry or to think and can just let himself go. Sexual.), Izutsumi wants a mother figure that can offer her warmth and comfort with who she doesn’t have to be tough (Familial), and I believe Laios’ is platonic and centered on his desire to have people with who he belongs and can be himself with…

But Laios’ case is more complex, it has layers. The thing is, even if Laios wanted to have someone able to turn him into a monster—which it didn’t even have to be, could straight up have just been a monster with such powers—, it didn’t have to be someone he knew. You could say the succubus wanted to disarm Laios’ suspicions with someone he knew and that was nearby, but the succubus seem very direct in every other case, simply appearing with someone’s greatest appearance even though both Marcille and Chilchuck were fully on guard and the succubi knew it. "Believability" isn’t an important factor. No, his succubus being someone he knew was important. It being Marcille was important.

There’s a TLDR at the end of this if you want to cut it short. For everyone else, strap in everyone, if you don’t know me hi I’m Fumi and I made this 3k words long analysis and theorizing bc I am autistic much like the character in question and I think this is both fascinating and has a lot to say. In this I offer both platonic and romantic reasonings and I do go rather in depth in Laios’ psychology and relationships to dissect what ever could this damn cryptic event MEAN. Spoilers for the succubus chapters obviously and also the last few arcs of the series so… Spoilers for the series as a whole!

—

So attraction wise it’s kinda unsure where Laios stands. He does sort of logically list off aesthetically pleasing traits of the orc’s wives, but besides that… Not really, or he never voices it anyways. He and Marcille never share like “omg you’re pretty” moments or anything. Senshi gets more compliments than either of them through the series lmfao. Maybe Laios is asexual, maybe he simply doesn’t show outwardly his attraction much or even maybe isn’t self-aware about it, regardless… Laios HAS implied preference for Marcille’s looks in the past. With the orcs, he said that “tallmen like long ears”. Laios’ shapeshifter of Marcille has her hair down just like her succubus, which by Kui is explained to be because she had it down when she revived Falin and it really marked him, though it could also be interesting to see it as his mental image of her as her most authentic self, I’ve seen it theorized that it’s a preference too but I think that’s disproven. But of course the most damning evidence itself… The succubus scene. It could have been anyone else in the party, certainly Senshi shares Laios’ interest in monsters much more already. We shouldn’t discredit the way Laios was blushing madly once she revealed she was a monster, that made her more attractive to Laios for sure, but he still wouldn’t have reacted that way if it was just anyone. The contexts are very different, but we can compare it to how Laios reacted when Lycion turned into a wolf man in front of him for instance. Laios certainly doesn’t act that way with Izutsumi- and it’s confirmed like a page later that he does see Izutsumi as a monster already. AND!! Laios starts blushing madly BEFORE she says that she can turn him into a monster- and we can safely assume that the blush isn’t out of simple fluster but out of desire/infatuation since he clearly wants her to bite him in the next page and his blush does not relent at all.

There’s something we could say about Laios’ liking of Marcille being born out of companionship rather than aesthetic attraction, on familiarity and intimacy. As members of the same party they’ve spent a lot of time together and we’ve seen that Laios trusts in her and relies on her for her skillset and avice. If Laios’ interest in her developped more naturally and gradually, valuing the familiar bond they have, I don’t see why he’d be acting all blushy and lovesick every time they interact or whatever, which is the explanation I have for Marcille genuinely being Laios’ most alluring form but him not freezing at the sight of it. That could also be a reason why he physically rejects succubus!Marcille instinctively, because something about her feels off or different (which is sorta the most direct interpretation of the scene, since Laios’ first thought is that it can’t be Marcille and must be a monster).

 [Edited in: Oh my god. The picture above is the last page of the dullahan chapter, chapter 57, a chapter that centers around Laios and Marcille’s relationship through flashbacks as Laios is on the brink of death and sees his life flashing before his eyes (he remembers how they first met, etc, which is also interesting to note that on the brink of death he reminisces about her the most). The last page of that chapter, more or less the thesis of the chapter in which we see Laios opens up about the real reason he and Falin go dungeon diving to her after them having a rough meeting but she turns out to also have an interest in dungeons, has Laios go "she starts out frowning but she ends up smiling! Wether its’s about eating monsters or about me :)”. That chapter is the one right before th succubus chapters. Laios’ most alluring form wasn’t “just” Marcille, it’s a SMILING Marcille. Which is why the succubus had such a weird and off demeanor right away (which gets knocked off once it doesn’t work and becomes a more Marcille-like Marcille)! It was only focused on smiling because it was the angle it was working from.

Oh my god it makes sense. It’s a direct narrative link, it’s as explicitly put with its story structure without Kui just stating it, besides, you know, the many times Laios says how precious her smile is to him. He’s like “I love her smile” and right next chapter the succubus is like “yes this is what he likes seeing most”. But… This also does mean that the focus might be less romantic, like Marcille’s significance doesn’t diminish, but then the alluring form might be less about her and more about the smile itself. About having a friend who looks at him like that, about someone who smiles after eating monster dishes or surpassing obstacles together… Or it can actually be so much more romantic. Like, maybe the smiling Marcille doesn’t work is because well, it’s not like Marcille, she wouldn’t just be smiling like that and behave like that (esp since his musing is about how her smiles are sort of “earned”, that she doesn’t smile right away but it’s sort of like a rewarding sight when she does). So then the most alluring form of Marcille doesn’t work because she doesn’t convincingly BEHAVE like her. His most alluring form isn’t a Marcille-lookalike, it’s her as a whole. More on the succubus shifting/switching in its approach later.]

Anyways.

Where was I. Ah yes, “It could have been anyone else in the party, certainly Senshi shares Laios’ interest in monsters much more already.” But then that’s the point isn’t it. I think Laios’ succubus being Marcille is because his wish isn’t so much focused on her, or on becoming a monster, but on not being alone. On being understood. On having others finally share his interest. On not only becoming a monster, but having someone to share that with. A trusted friend, a companion, or a lover, it matters little in my interpretation, the bedrock of it stays the same. And this is why it’d be someone he already knew instead of someone new, because it’d defeat the point, and it was maybe Marcille because she’s the most vocal about finding monsters disgusting: it’d have finally been a shift in her that she now liked monsters. And again this brings back to when he talks about her smile, when he says that she starts out unhappy with eating monsters, but ends up smiling by the end of it. Her smile itself represents that though first impression or reflexive dislike, someone can turn around and end up liking it anyways, it’s hope for his interests to be liked and perhaps for him to be lovable as well, that it’s possible to be accepted.

But I do think it would be a mistake to say that there’s absolutely no romantic interest, that it’s plainly platonic or another kind of interest misplaced and idealized in her. What we saw with the other succubus is that they 100% act in ways that the person desires, sure Izutsumi’s start attacking after a while, but that was after pushing them over the edge, and succubus Marcille wasn’t being agressive nor did she have a reason to be (even when she could have with Laios’ choking, she didn’t turn to violence, so she was 100% still in seduction mode). Ultimately the goal of the succubus is to make physical contact to be able to suck their essence, but the way they go about achieving that is tailored to the individual’s desire, Marcille’s kissed her hand and Izutsumi’s offered a hug.  The succubus can identify and embody complex desires, often subconscious ones, shown with Izutsumi’s. They go straight to it without complex subterfuge either. Chilchuck’s succubi were very direct because that’s what he wanted, Marcille’s was courtly because that’s what she wanted, Izutsumi’s offered motherly comfort and affection because that’s what she wanted, and Laios’ is Marcille attempting to kiss him. Let that sink in.

Laios why are you choking the supposed key to your heart?

Ok so the theory that Laios’ desire is to have a deeper companionship from an existing companion is pretty tame and surface level I’d say, but strap in… The way Laios reacted violently to Marcille trying to kiss him is VERY interesting. The first thing he thinks about is that she isn’t Marcille so she must be a succubus, then confusion at to why it’s her. He’s even afraid of what the others would think, feeling… Shame? With how he imagines Marcille would be horrified that he likes her that way. Fear of rejection?

But no no, what interests me is the shift that the succubus makes. It seemed very confident at first, went straight in, but when overpowered shifted the direction it was going in- shifted from a desire for Marcille to a desire for a monster Marcille and whatever deeper desire that hides. But??? Succubi did not make mistakes as to what someone wanted thus far, possibly that has never ever happened before by human records. Could the succubus truly have miscalculated what Laios desires? It’d be hard to imagine that the succubus would misunderstand what type of companionship someone wished for or what approach to take, since it’s done complex cases before too, Izutsumi being very much in denial before it & at first. In Izutsumi’s case, even with her complex feelings over it and her two souls desiring different things, the succubus did not miss its mark, and ultimately it was having a second soul for who the succubus wasn’t alluring that allowed her not to be frozen to the spot. But with Laios the succubus fully switches strategy.

The thing is that succubi don’t usually need to switch strategies, because the form and approach they take always work and always leave the victim frozen. Izutsumi bypassed this because of her two souls, but was still frozen and struggling to reject the succubus at first. And yet? Laios did. A succubus’ victim is supposed to be instantly frozen, and yet Laios acts on instinct and defensively agressive as soon as his reaction time allows. And well, it’s hard to really come to a logical conclusion as to why, since we have no idea of what rules can override a succubus’ temptation besides multiple souls… C’mon regular Marcille can’t be the winged lion/kenksuke’s desire bc of the loose hair being Laios’ mind-Marcille we’ve gone over this /hj Although, since it’s confirmed that the winged lion was watching with the dream Laios gets induced right after, maybe he’s what allowed Laios to be moving? It’s possible that it’d have frozen him otherwise, even if Laios with his full rationale wouldn’t have accepted the kiss faced with supernatural allure he might have gotten paralysis from being overwhelmed, similarly to how if Chilchuck had his full rationale he wouldn’t allow a woman like his succubus to kiss him (he’s always stayed faithful to his wife even after 4 years of separation, give the guy his earned credit). Getting somewhat offtopic, but something to say about how if that’s the case once again the theme of ‘irrational desire you crave vs what you truly want/need’ that is present throughout the manga would be reflected.

My best guess however on why Laios reacted so quickly and forcefully is: trauma. The more recent arcs with Laios suggest that Laios has deep-seated trauma over humans. He dislikes humans as a whole, that was like, pretty much stated, though perhaps exaggerated. As a kid he fantasized about monsters wiping out human towns. We know Laios has been ostracized for most of his life by others, in his village and in the military, and beyond social rejection it’s shown he got beaten in group too and it was implied that it happened regularly. But damn, disliking humans to the point of wanting to be a monster and murderous genocidal reclusive envies and all of that stuff? That is massive trauma, massive identity & belonging issues and hint at massive trust issues.

So then, the negative reaction could be because of Laios’ deep trauma with humans. Because of trauma getting activated, not due to a miscalculation on the succubus’ part but due to a contradicting dislike of the desire that makes the form inherently and straight out of the gate un-alluring, Laios’ repression being so strong that he’s able to affect his own desires in that way, or an instinctive defense response to the trigger (a human).   Even though Laios hides it well, once again recent arcs (and some other moments) make it clear that Laios still has some innate dislike of humans, which in canon is a term that all races like elves fit in. He has a bias against them, perhaps even an innate distrust of them. Who knows how aware he is of it, or how much control and will he has over it. What if Laios reacting agressively to it was his defense mode tied to this kicking in, a survival and security instinct, stopping any possibility of Laios wanting a romantic relationship with a human? Any chance of that human getting close and being hurt by it, either rejected or stabbed in the back? It’d then make sense if Laios is unaware and doesn’t understand his attraction to Marcille then, if it’s a sort of self-made blockage, denial. And that’d make full sense with how, when Marcille is suddenly a monster, then all of Laios’ reluctance is gone and he’s fully enthralled, all that it took was taking away that one blockage for Laios to be utterly charmed. It takes away the trigger element, humans, and replaces it for something safer. A desire for connections, but connections with people that are ‘safe’, people who also don’t fit in with society, who are part of his interest in monsters, who would accept and understand him. I think that Laios does desire human connections, specifically, but can’t allow himself to pursue them either from conscious or unconscious trauma, so though he does desire it he can’t accept that he does/can’t accept the relationship even if it’s handed to him on a silver platter.

Conclusion

The succubus’ shift could then be either that it switched from one wish, a wish for Marcille, to another, a wish for companionship in monster-liking, or that it stayed on the same fundamental wish, but had to improvise with the new information (that Laios is human-averse)(not bc it didn’t exist previously but bc it wasn’t manifested) to take out of the equation the thing that was holding Laios back (from giving in).

But well, the fact that the rest of the party is included does lean towards the former, but in any case that doesn’t erase all I’ve spoken about, all about how Marcille is 100% the focus of this whole thing. It could still be a bit of both. But it is interesting that he worries about the party’s reaction to seeing his succubus being Marcille, and when she shifts into monster Marcille he *still* worries about the others: “b-but what about the others?” He’s a mess, with his most alluring form seducing him, and he still has a shred of resistance in him to question how the others would react, and it’s only when she says that they’re already monsters too that he truly gives in. Is he really so afraid of ostracization? Of losing the people he cares about due to judgement? Then the mention of the others in the party can simply be something the succubus added on top to unlock another “blockage”, the same way she added Marcille being a monster on top of the basic premise of Marcille; Take out the immediate dismissal of humans first, and then the fear of loss and judgement from other friends so Laios can finally stop worrying and give in. That worry/framing I’d say makes the latter more credible, because it’s not the premise of the alluring form but an extra.

In the end, like the recent arcs kind of spell out, the thing central to Laios’ character is less so a love for monsters and moreso a dislike for humans, and this is what this puts on full display.

Laios’ most alluring form is Marcille, a human that doesn’t understand his interests and thus him, and regardless of everything else that Marcille is, that is so traumatic to him that all of his being immediately rejects it.

—

Thanks for coming to my ted talk! I’ve spent so much time thinking about this and wording and rewording this same train of thought, also it’s the end of my college semester and I’m going crazy

Tldr: My personal fav theory for Laios’ succubus is that Laios really values Marcille’s smile a ton like it’s often mentioned, and that’s what his most alluring form centers on. I’ve got a ton of different interpretation on the why it’d go for a kiss? Since it tailors its approach to the person’s desires, but obviously something goes wrong with Laios’, which is really interesting because even with Izutsumi who resists because she has 2 souls so one part of her can always remain unaffected, the succubus hit bullseye on her most alluring forms. But regardless of that, I think his desire for Marcille (either her or what she represents, wether as a platonic ideal or something else) isn’t wrong/untrue perse, but that Laios has such a complex with humans and intimacy and connecting with others that his defense mode kicks in and that’s when the succubus has to shift into a different, safer desire: one that doesn’t involve humans but that still shows connections and acceptance and belonging. Also Laios realizes that it isn’t Marcille when she goes in for the kiss, which if his allure for her is based on familiarity since they’re friends and all could make sense that it’d break him away from it, or since it’s a liking based on familiarity he doesn’t freeze, or maybe it’s because the winged lion has its eye on him. I think that’s so much more likely with how Kui makes even her jokes be character moments or at least consistent, and also with the tension of the scene, than just the scene being a gag about how Marcille doesn’t mean much to Laios actually.

I think there’s a lot to be said about why Marcille is special to Laios, why her smile means something to him, etc, and I don’t think saying Marcille is special to him is exaggeration or reaching at all. Laios, Marcille and Falin are the golden trio, she’s the deuteragonist, she’s the only other character in the main party whose goal in going back for Falin is Falin and who has a bond with her and Laios outside of being coworkers, in post-canon they live together, happily, in the anime’s ending they’re emphased on by dining out all three together... I could go on.   Marcille has the benefit of being very trusted by Laios, not only with the time they’ve spent together but how she was Falin’s friends first, the person he himself feels so protective of and has been so consistently ostracized throughout her life. Marcille represents a positive odd one out that’s like, the good example of "humanity can be good and safe and warm actually".  Which is a big reason why imo Marcille is like, the secondary protag and with Falin they form the golden trio. She’s central to the story in many ways including making Laios see that humanity is worth saving and sticking with, but that’s a topic for another analysis. One such reason is how his first meeting with her went: it started really badly but ended with her coming around and unexpectedly sharing their interest in dungeons, which made him and Falin open up about the real reason they go dungeon diving, perhaps for the first time. There is just so much that goes into it but Laios seems generally very expectant of rejection: in the climax chapters after he transformed back as a human and was hiding out in the woods, pre-canon in an extra where we see him battling himself on if he should suggest eating monsters or not. But another one, the one I truly want to bring up in this post, is how genuine Marcille is! And funnily enough, how dramatic she is, and how her elf ears change position depending on her emotions. Like, let me compare her affectionately to a dog for a second, but dogs move their ears and use whole body language to communicate, and I think that part of Marcille, really strong emoting, with her ears and body language on top of her often dramatic facial expressions, reassure him. Like ok, maybe he can’t tell when Shuro and Kabru would lie to him, but Marcille? She wears her heart on her sleeve and her feelings on her whole self. And that takes away some of the stress and trauma he has with humans, explains why her smiles would “put him at ease”, doesn’t it?

I don’t remember wether I’ve mentioned this somewhere or just in my reblog linked at the end of the post, but while at first I thought the succubus going for a kiss on the lips heavily implied a romantic desire in Laios,  now I have a couple different theories on why the succubus would have gone for that approach. I think the most likely is that, if the principal allure of his succubus is her smile, the succubus is like "as long as he sees her face right up until i can suck up his blood and he passes out I’ll be gucci", so it’s not about the kiss but about him seeing her face all the while until the very last moment, so he stays charmed.

Btw chapter 34 explores Laios’ relationship with touch too imo, and we see that he is uncomfortable with touch to some degree, very unsure and hesitant and tense. I feel like it’s something more shown in a bigger picture sense with his whole struggles with humans and extras, than just in any one page so go reread the beginning of that chapter if you want I’d say, but putting a page below as example anyways. I think it’s notable that it’s a character moment shared with Marcille too, she acts sort of like a bridge to humanity with social propriety and being extroverted in many cases. In the chapter Chil and Marcille point out how awkward he is with touch, but he learns to be casual/comfy enough about touch to do healing magic with her (something that was also enforced through him having to practice magic on Marcille turned to stone, he got a lot of touch exposure and magic practice done in those days. Dammit Laios, MArcille and touch is worthy of a whole analysis of its own). She’s just like, his human comfort zone, even if they aren’t that close at least at first, besides Falin he has literally like no friends and I think that itself shows how he doesn’t fit in well socially and that it’s a significant struggle for him. But yes what I was saying here is I believe there’s setup for him recoiling from touch like he did with the succubus (due to an instinctive aversion to touch made especially intense due to the succubus’ oddness and forwardness).

I have even more theories and rambling on details on the succubus here in a reblog, but unless I want to put in some pictures of Laios repressing himself around others and such I don’t think I’ll be touching this post again in a while

[hollowed-theory-hall]

I was wondering what you thought of the Dursley’s and their treatment of Harry, I know some people think the abuse was a negative affect of the Horcrux, do you agree or do you think they are just bad people

Hi 👋

Yeah, I'm familiar with the theory that the Dursleys were affected by the Horcrux in Harry, I don't think that's the case. We don't see anyone else being mean to Harry for no apparent reason. Ron and Hermione spend just as much if not more time around him and they never seem affected by any Horcrux magic.

The Dursleys are just bad people. Bad people I can understand the motivations of, but bad people nonetheless.

The text literally explains to us what Petunia's deal is. She's jealous:

“You knew?” said Harry. “You knew I’m a — a wizard?” “Knew!” shrieked Aunt Petunia suddenly. “Knew! Of course we knew! How could you not be, my dratted sister being what she was? Oh, she got a letter just like that and disappeared off to that — that school — and came home every vacation with her pockets full of frog spawn, turning teacups into rats. I was the only one who saw her for what she was — a freak! But for my mother and father, oh no, it was Lily this and Lily that, they were proud of having a witch in the family!”

(PS, 41)

Vernon is an all-around unpleasant guy who likes it when things are normal. He loves his family in his own way, but he's incredibly intolerant of anything he doesn't consider the epitome of normal.

As he sat in the usual morning traffic jam, he couldn’t help noticing that there seemed to be a lot of strangely dressed people about. People in cloaks. Mr. Dursley couldn’t bear people who dressed in funny clothes — the getups you saw on young people! He supposed this was some stupid new fashion. He drummed his fingers on the steering wheel and his eyes fell on a huddle of these weirdos standing quite close by. They were whispering excitedly together. Mr. Dursley was enraged to see that a couple of them weren’t young at all; why, that man had to be older than he was, and wearing an emerald-green cloak! The nerve of him!

(PS, 6)

Dudley is more complicated, he was a child, with his very shitty parents who were the worst possible rule models for him, you can easily understand why he turned out the way he did. We also see he is capable of growth:

“I don’t think you’re a waste of space.” If Harry had not seen Dudley’s lips move, he might not have believed it. As it was, he stared at Dudley for several seconds before accepting that it must have been his cousin who had spoken for one thing. Dudley had turned red. Harry was embarrassed and astonished himself. “Well . . . er . . . thanks, Dudley.” [...] “But he hasn’t said thank you at all!” said Hestia indignantly. “He only said he didn’t think Harry was a waste of space!” “Yeah, but coming from Dudley that’s like ’I love you,”’ said Harry, torn between annoyance and a desire to laugh as Aunt Petunia continued to clutch at Dudley as if he had just saved Harry from a burning building

(DH, 40)

The fact Dudley’s treatment of Harry changed over the years and he became a better person thanks to knowing Harry proves the Horcrux didn't affect the Dursleys' behavior towards him. After all, if it did, Dudley wouldn't improve like this.

But the main reason I oppose the Horcrux made the Dursleys bad theory, though, is a narrative one.

I mean, shrugging all of the Dursleys' abuse of Harry to magical nonsense cheapens it. It gives them an excuse and basically absolves them. It means Dudley and his parents don't need to change, they're fine, it's just evil magic affecting their brains. It makes Dudley's small turnaround at the end worthless.

And worse than that, in my opinion, is how it makes Harry the cause of his own misery. I think it sends the completely wrong message to say that the abused kid is causing their own abuse by a magical halo that makes people evil to him. Like, that idea in itself is something I find incredibly vile.

Like, child abuse is awful, children in these environments often think there is a reason they are treated that way. That there's something they can do to make their treatment better. To make their guardians like them...

But there isn't. It was never their fault and the treatment isn't fair. There is no justification or reason that makes it okay.

I think giving the Dursleys a justifiable reason to abuse Harry goes against all of that. It cheapens the narrative, excuses Harry's suffering, weakens Dudley's mini-redemption, and it makes me feel super icky.

[tumblingxelian]

Chloe Bourgeois - Not a Typical Mean Girl

No, I am not going to sit here and talks about Chloe's family, or issues, or one writers seeming obsession with her. No!

I am here to discuss what I think is a very common misunderstanding about Chloe's character and the show in fandom that often crops up in discussion regarding her.

Namely that the thing Chloe needs most is to be chastised, rejected & punished for her mean behavior, that will sort her out!

As though that wasn't already a thing that happens?

Bear with me and I'll explain that claim first:

The school does not like punishing any students. The only reason Alya was punished for coordinating an effort to break into Chloe's locker is because Chloe threatened the principle. The only reason Marinette was almost expelled was because Lila framed her for cheating, theft & assault all in one day & she still needed to make a scene of the whole affair. There's one teacher that punishes students, but she does so unfairly, cruelly and haphazardly and in season 1, Chloe was not shown getting any special treatment from her. Special treatment from the faculty was not a thing unless we are counting later retcons.

So now that the faculty is out of the way, wat I mean is that Chloe is not a typical mean girl because she is not popular.

In stuff like Mean Girls, Heathers and so on, the usual standard is that the mean girls are mean, but they are also revered, beloved, popular in one way or another despite their horrible behavior.

This is not the case with Chloe.

Even in Season 1 where only Marinette & Nino seems to start the season disliking Chloe. (Her presence unpleasant but hardly traumatic given the Origins level bickering) Chloe was still not widely well liked by the class or school.

She had one friend in Sabrina and a second oh so briefly in Adrien, which did let her absorb some of his celebrity by proximity. But within 48 hours of having him she lost him; with Adrien becoming more distant to divorce himself from her behavior.

That's it and while one can say her haughty attitude and ego are the reason we know from season 2 she is aware everyone hates her & it upsets her.

S1-Chloe did get invited to some class events, but even then her presence was not largely welcomed with most far less prone to be patient with her than they were with others even if they exhibited similar behavior. Such as Kim bullying Ivan, or Nino expressing blatant frustration with Mylene, ETC.

By late season 2 she was pretty much entirely segregated from her peers, barring Sabrina, and her presence welcomed with shades of disinterest, disdain or outright hostility. Sometimes evoked on her part or just in general.

This is a big difference from the usual Mean Girls = Popular Girls trend but I often don't see it acknowledged in fandom discourse.

This especially feels to be the case given so often I see people arguing Chloe "needs" to be rejected, or told her behavior is bad, or that no one likes her... But she is, all the time, she is entirely aware people don't like her and unhappy about it.

The issue is not that her bad behavior is being rewarded in school. The issue is that bad behavior is what she was taught at home and what is encouraged there and what is shown to work for her parents. But it doesn't work for her and she doesn't know why, because no one really bothers to teach her why. hey just get angry and snap at her or ignore her.

& sure you can say its not her peers job to explain morality o empathy to someone who was explicitly taught by their father how to cheat at & win elections by intimidation. But the fact is no one at home is going to do so because they are modelling, encouraging & teaching the opposite up until it impacts 'them' personally.

Not sure if there's a greater point to this, but...

I often find people acting like the thing Chloe needs is for her bad behavior not to be 'rewarded' or 'indulged' by her class and to instead be 'rejected' and for her to face 'consequences'.

But she does! That's basically all she does; & When she doesn't usually an Akuma tries to murder her anyway!

So yeah, Chloe isn't a typical mean girl.

She's actually deeply unpopular among classmates and the school has a discipline issue all over, it didn't come from her.

More negativity is not going to magically make her "better".

[3grey-morals5]

hcs-scp/035&049🤩🤩🤩 (hc1)

uhh...idk I'm just putting shit here atp. Just kinda putting stuff down as I think abt/remember it. Please note this is a bit shippy, but it isnt like.. Dumbed down and cutesy. i try my best to give both chars a more mature and thoughtful feel - stay close to the scp aEsThEtIc of seriousness

THIS IS ALL MY IDEAS FOR IT. NO IT MAY NOT BE TRUE TO TH3 CANON.

-035

this pertains to the collection as a whole, but it's kinda like. There was a original 035 right. That was the jester/black lord consciousness, and it was alone until they left alagadda and the mask started having more hosts. Each new one added the consciousness of that host into the "hivemind" of other hosts.

Due to this system of consciousness , past memories from the other hosts and original, the BL(black lord not boy love) are sorta like a weird game of telephone. For example, the bl liked 049 in alagadda, and that got passed on- but through the different telling of stories the perception changed. So, they mostly recognize 049, but don't know why he's so important so they're left guessing.

smells interesting. Like those dried flower things that give of a nice smell but also to a point it's too sickly sweet or has a unpleasant after smell. Coupled with the hosts smell ofc, but the mask on its own smells like that and a bit earthy too. It's seems nice at first but the more you smell it the more it deteriorates into ...eugh.

This is kinda relevant more to my alagadda hcs, but explains the "goop" coming from them. In alagadda, ESPECIALLY in lords, their is a surplus of unwanted (or wanted, that will be gotten to in the future) humors. For example, the red lord has too much red humor(blood I beleive?) That overhauls all other emotions or humors into JUST mirth. They physically cant feel anything other than that. This goes for the Bl too, there was just so much black bile causing anguish that that was all they could feel. Thus, deteriorating them mentally and physically bc..I mean if you were in constant upset it would take a toll on you. How to fix this? Bloodletting! Er, BILE letting. It helps balance out the humors, to be able to feel more than just their assigned humor. Somehow in the transition from alagadda to the "real world" there was a constant flow able to break through the mask, thus 035 is able to switch emotions very fast and not dwell on just one. Well not more than a normal being would.

In constant mental turmoil due to contaiment,multitude of hosts, nature of said hosts, ect. Causes extreme mood swings, lashing out, psychotic behavior, ect. Like. Not even a headcanon really but they're actually insane. Prone to rash decisions that don't consider future repercussions, unhealthy attachments, Yada Yada Yada.

Moral compass is completely fucked but still tries to do what they pertain as GOOD. Leads to alottt of awkward situations with the staff bc like. Got a Lil dirty secret? Mask mf knows. And you know very well he WILL leak that shit like a furry fandom beware but with 10x more salt in the wound.

will lie withought shame. Not really a headcanon cause this is common knowledge but I just wanna push that this mf is NOT a truthful bitch. 100% a scam artist in a modern setting, and at one point swore up and down that they invented an idea or product just for the fun of seeing how far it could go.

fun fact: Dýo (THE Scp035) actually came up with the idea for the bicycle far before it's alleged creation? The mask states: "My dearest ------- is so slow in his gait! I beleived it would assist him in an easier - and if I may say, more amusing way of transport"

Alagadda related, but..haha. lord. Emo ass lord./pos Look at you all "cut my life into peices" and wearing all black with black hair and a black feather but still got that pale ass face like uve seen a ghost thrice in the last few seconds. In my version they're the youngest of the 4 and...certainly act like it. At least from the media, me being an only child I don't know what siblings are like.

Despite their very VERY disturbing looks, the bl is actually a fairly nice guy(keep in mind this is BEFORE all of the new hosts so it's just one conciousness). The most pessimistic guy you will ever meet, but still a nice one. The palace is dreary asf but is quiet and relatively easygoing as long as you follow some set rules. Anguish dosent like going out much, prefers to stay in doors and refuses all their fellow lords(mainly mirth) attempts to have them join in on the "fun" preferring to instead stay stuck in the past and wallow in self pity. The only way this was turned was at the start of the bile-letting by a doctor (049) and that gave him the actual capacity to feel other than anguish- growing fond of his "savior" and attempting to court him (eventually succeeding. They had a relatively good relationship before all went to shit) he still had alot of sadness, but was more active and lively much to the suprise of palacegoers and dismay of other lords - and of course, the ambassador.

There is much more I would like to add for 035, them being my favorite for...5 or so years now? Has given me plenty of thinking time to develop new ideas for them. I still have much left to say but this is getting upsettingly long and I wish to move onto 049. (Then for a treat, you may have some hcs of their relationship- the good and bad)

-049

Im not gonna assign mental illnesses or disabilities i know nothing about to characters, but there is certainly something going on here.

Began with small signs at childhood. Normally level headed but could snap at family and friends out of the blue, anxious behaviors, visions/illusions or whatever they're called, along with hearing voices and following impulse. They eventually were housed in solidarity by their parents out of worry for their child, (now around teenage) worsening their condition. Sometime during the start of the plauge, they were able to escape and made their way into society.

Really does think he's doing good! Like.. really is trying!! But it's not good at all!!! Primarily self taught with shit he finds around and learning from other doctors, which ahem, eventually are killed to use as patients when the mental instability sets in again and he starts to view them as sick or evil in some way. Not sanitary(obv) but even worse so because he is constantly mucking around in body pits trying to do something covered in rot and gross never changing, rarely eating..just a real sight.

Some way or another made it to alagadda. Yay? Something in the way the city feels is calming, and depresses his mind into a more manedgable and "normal" state where he is able to think clearly. The peak in his career where he learned the most, did the most good, and was a TRUE doctor.

Spent a lot of time in the library, then wandering around in very little free time usually giving remedies to townsfolk suffering from whatever ailments eith the supplies he had. Eventually supplies were sponsored by Anguish when they grew close, and he was able to make quite a name for himself within the citizen community. Retained humanity and compassion which was relatively new in the city, and that drew many in

All good must come to an end though, and being banished from alagadda back in the normal world (with 035 but he's not as important in this awesomesauce 049 discussion) did a huge number on his health and basically reset all the progress he made. Turning ..well, crazy, once again and running even more rampant with the new knowledge he learned. This is where he began actually being able to revive.

A very gentlemanly fellow on the outside but it's a whole fucking shitshow on the interior. It takes alot out of them to constantly stay in check(a skill he's learned with his years) but every once in a while it slips and he just bursts or goes into autopilot(not good either)

Very insecure and untrusting, and while looking a lot more sincere and well rounded/not impulsive like 035, he really isn't a polar opposite. Lil bro is anxious point and laugh at his dumbass.(relax snowflakes, I have diagnosed anxiety I can make this joke 🥰)

No I don't have as much stuff for 049 as 035, as I find him more tricky to write for and thus am spending more time trying to round out my perception of him. Anyways. Here's some cute and also sad 035x049 shit idfk it's almost 1 am I'm so tired of typing if you're actually reading this ily

-good!!!! During alagadda

was very one sided at first, mainly Anguish puppy dog eyes over his cool goth bird crush who LITTERALLY made him feel something other than anguish with procedures and all.

At last 049 (bless his heart he was so sheltered he dosent have much a grasp on the concept of love or whatevs) was like maybe this guy wanna be more than friends. Much to bls relief this attempt at courting bad been going on for far too long in his humble opinion.

Spend an ungodly amount of time together. Like enough to raise suspicion if they weren't extremely careful with all of it. If thus shit got out...(it did) it would be over for lovey dovey couple

Lots of time spent in the palace gardens...mmm grey lavender is such an appealing smell to experience while you're giggling shrouded by bushes trying to keep your relations with your first love hidden like Romeo and James or some shit. Anguish taught him to dance like the citizens at balls did, and it was very much appreciated - a big pass time of theirs. 049 still kinda has to sleep? Bl dosent, but he likes to just read silently while doc uses his much larger body as a pillow. (And maybe wake him up out of sheer boredom, much to docs dismay)

049 enjoys preening with the use of anguish 's bile as a sort of shampoo. It slides right off his feather and hair and takes all the little mites with him. In turn, doc will scratch places that are "hard to reach " can bl get them himself? Maybe. But he would much rather a professional do it.

Anguish was giddy at the start of their courting and would write poems at their anniversaries (one week, one month, 2 months, ect) doc would always try to read them but eventually would have to have bl read them due to the handwriting. At times bl couldn't even read what he scribbled down only hours earlier. These weren't a few stanzas either, these were LONGASS poems ok. He has alot of free time.

Physical touch is a blessing when you spend alot of you lives being seen as sickly and gross, so they usually will have some sort of contact. That is, if doc isn't in a sour mood and feeling extra prickly.

They sure as hell respect boundaries though. Bl knows the signs of a doc that isn't in the mood to get poked or messed with, and doc in turn sees when anguish isn't in the best mood to be given sass. He is always down to be poked and messed with but God forbid someone roll their eyes at him when he's almost enraged

-bad :(((((( after alagadda

Their worst traits feed of eachother. Bad.

Heh..I'm a fool guys....I like good relationship sm that I forgot to hc bad...oopsies. jk but not ill have them in the future but dawg it 1 30 am I wanna go to bed!!!

If there is errors in this I am very sorry. I am also very sleepy and aore and that is why there is errors. THANK YOU FOR READING THIS FAR ONG??? Hope u enjoyed. Adios :3

[pomegraphy]

How to Guide on Shadow work,

A loose Step by step and simple guide to shadow work.

Before you continue

I know we all saw those tiktok shadow work books and how easy it was! Now, so many people are trying to get into shadow work, but they just don't know how or what it actually is! So I'm here to try my best and explain what it is, the benefits, and the purpose of it! If anything I said is wrong, please let me know! Remember! Everything I say is just what I know works for ME. If it doesn't work for you, create a way that does work for you! Find more resources that can help you!

What exactly is Shadow work?

First, we have to understand what a Shadow is. Carl Jung is a psychiatrist and psychoanalyst who created the Jungian Archetypes. The term Shadow and what we're focusing on comes from Jung's model of psyche. The Shadow is the unconscious part of your mind that has all of the repressed aspects of oneself.

But what does this mean exactly?

It means that the Shadow embodies the unpleasant side of yourself. From unfilled desires, unhealed damage/trauma, and things you consider to be harmful. Also, it can be referred to as self-projecting.

People naturally repress their Shadow because it's things that are socially unacceptable, harmful, or hurts you in some way or form be mentally or physically.

Shadow Work

Now, Shadow Work is actually a type of psychotherapy in psychology. It involves exploring, acknowledging, and integrating the parts of yourself that you've previously repressed or even ignored.

The goal of Shadow Work is to recognize and acknowledge those parts of yourself. It's to learn that the parts you repress is who you are and those parts of yourself aren't good or bad. It's to learn how to accept yourself and who you are at your core.

How Shadow Work helps

Identifying and regulating your emotions (why do I feel this way? Am I angry at you or at myself?)

Improving your self esteem, self acceptance, self confidence, and self projecting

Strengthening and deepening relationships

Learning healthy coping mechanisms that work for YOU

Learning and how to modify self-sabotaging behaviors

Be cautious

It is easy to go down into a self deprecating spiral when doing this! Remember that the goal is to NOT highlight your worst qualities and get rid of them but to accept those qualities and learn how to live WITH those qualities. You are exploring yourself. This means self acceptance. By rejecting parts of yourself you are going down the opposite path!

How to approach shadow work?

Think of all of your 'cringiest/embarrassing' moments and stop thinking about how other people view it or what other people think or how you THINK they thought about it. Think about WHY you felt embarrassed in that moment. Be on your own side. Don't be an enemy to yourself or bully.

If something about a person triggers you (shocked, taken aback at their behavior), think how you would react to yourself exhibiting that behavior? Are you jealous or resentful of someone? Feel that feeling and really get to know it. Know exactly what you are feeling and know the exact cause.

Understand WHY you have negative behaviors. Did something happen in the past that made you develop that behavior? Once you acknowledge and recognize the cause of that behavior, you can then work towards a path of 'healing' in a way that you can accept it and find the next step towards a better sense of self that YOU can accept.

Recognize that the past does not exist. What exists is the present. If you felt embarrassed, something in your 'past' has conditioned you to feel that way. Your mind is still holding on to what has conditioned you. You have to learn to let go because the past is no longer happening right now. It doesn't exist, so there's no need to still feel conditioned to react embarrassed when it's already passed.

Everything you do as a habit, belief, or values that you don't fully understand will form and is your shadow.

Beware that you have things about yourself that you don't fully understand. Take time, reflect, recollect, and understand the things you don't get about yourself. There is never a 'I just picked this habit up.' Why did you pick that habit up? What made you pick it up? Is this a response to something that has happened to you before?

Why do you react a certain way? What caused it? When did you start doing it? What emotions do you feel during it? Why do you feel those emotions?

How do you motivate yourself? Why do you motivate yourself that way? What caused you to do it that way? Is it harmful or helpful? Why?

Integrate your Shadow to yourself. Find ways to express these unconscious things you repress in a healthy way.

Results of Shadow Work

It is important that as you see results that you MUST be kind to yourself. You must be patient and not rush through it. Setbacks are normal. Go at your own pace and take breaks. Everyone has a shadow. Do not feel upset over the things you learn about yourself. Seek help from others. It's okay to find a support system during this process. Whether it be from a professional or someone close to you.

Tips

Journaling your progress.

Be persistent

Be patient

Understand that not everyone goes on the same Shadow working process. Learn what does and doesn't work for you.

[pikuniku53353358]

wait what did a-rabid-snake do?? I heard you guys had a serious argument??

Yes, it's true... If you're so interested in what we quarreled about, then fine, I'll tell you. So... She sent all the members of my group in a telegram several times simply because she was in a "bad mood". And when I say everyone, I mean EVERYONE (there were also her friends and her ex-girlfriend and boyfriend in this group). She was offended by the fact that we did not comment on her art and ignored her, and when we began to comment on them, she accused us of making stupid jokes and in general we offended her (although there were jokes at the level of a Chinese Saint, since once she drew a Saint in a kimano)

And also she sometimes asked us to give her ideas for art, and when we offered her these very ideas, she said that: "oh, why did I ask you at all, you didn't help me in any way" and other similar hypocritical words. Why hypocritical? Because she herself could say rude words to someone and "joke" about my art (and there were already jokes at the level of the fact that when I drew the spear master in my imagination and there he had something like a skirt made of a piece of SRS fabric, she said that the spear master forcibly tore off this piece of fabric from him and when I said, that this was not the case and that it was done voluntarily, she said that "I like my version of events better." Excuse me, but what the hell?! ). In general, she was constantly offended by any trifle, presented herself as a victim and we had to endure her hot-tempered behavior, for which she NEVER apologized. Do you know why she left the group? Because once someone sent her shooting range list with ships with slugcats in Russian Discord server. Some of us were on this server, and when they noticed this, they sent her a screenshot and said, "Snake, did you send your tier list or did someone else do it?" She said that she did not do it. And one Of the members of our group, he said that he knew this person, found such a coincidence funny and began to laugh at it. That is, it had nothing to do with the Snake at all, the person was laughing not at her or her tier-list, but at the absurdity of the situation itself and the fact that he knew this person. But the Snake misunderstood everything, she thought that they were laughing at her, although we tried to explain to her that this was not the case and she left. And instead of keeping silent about this whole most stupid situation, she told about it in the tumblr and made the members of my group look bad and herself a victim. It's terrible. She did not think about the consequences of her actions, she never seemed to think about the consequences at all. But even after that, I tried to treat Snake well. She also wished my friend death once because he had created a meme for my band and one of her artworks appeared there for a few seconds. In this excerpt, no one insulted anyone or anything, this art was in the public domain, and this meme was not published anywhere outside of my group, which is a LOCAL place, and this meme is also LOCAL. But she somehow found out about this video, showed it in her telegram channel, got attached to the fact that no one has the right to use her art in anything like that, and, as I said, wished him dead.

But the last straw for me was that one day in her telegram channel the topic of discussing ships iterators and slugcats began, and one of my very good friends told Snake to just not pay attention to this if it is unpleasant for her to watch. Person expressed his NEUTRAL attitude towards all ships, but the Snake believed that she treats all ships POSITIVELY and that she supports ships with bestiality, pedophilia and incest, although she did not lay such thoughts. She doesn't care about these ships, but the Snake began to say how this person is disgusting. Another friend of mine, who has a real depression, stood up for my friend. And Snake in response literally sent him to hell. Moreover, before that, she left him to the mercy of fate, stopped supporting him in difficult times and, in principle, somehow communicating with him. The nickname of this person is "Just". That is, she began to insult two people who did NOTHING bad to the Snake, and one of the people had depression and she just sent them to hell. At the same time, she herself is offended by any "rude" word said to her. She is hypocritical... As a result, I got tired of enduring everything And after that incident we have stopped to communicate. If you don't believe me, I can provide screenshots with all the evidence.

[delicateflowerss]

Don't Worry, Darling: Three

After marrying the love of your life, Rafe Cameron, you thought you couldn't be happier. But when a murder shakes the island, you learn you don't know your husband as well as you thought. When does Paradise become Hell?

Warnings: 18+, eventual NON-CON, verbal/domestic abuse, dark!Rafe, mentions of murder, mentions of pregnancy/having kids, kook!reader, non-canon ages

Word Count: 3.9k

Series Masterlist

“So, let’s go over that again. You left the office around 11:30, correct?”

Shoupe’s stare is set on Rafe, almost like he’s waiting for your husband to blink at him wrong, anything to show he isn’t telling the truth.

“It was around that time. I don’t remember exactly.”

You can tell Rafe is fighting the urge to tell the police to fuck off, given the heavy annoyance lacing his tone. You worry he might, his impulse control only lasting so long.

Their incessant questions don’t help, going over every detail of the night Rafe last saw Chase alive.

It’s a strong case of déjà vu for you, Shoupe and the same officer as last time, sitting in the exact same spot on your couch. Except, you can feel the gravity of the situation now. A man you know has been killed.

“And nothing struck you as odd about Chase that night? All he said was bye as he was leaving?”

“That’s all I remember. How many times do I have to tell you I barely saw him that night?”

Whatever Rafe was holding back, he isn’t anymore, his anger getting the best of him. It doesn’t sit right with either officer, their meaningful glances toward each other telling you more than they’ll ever say.

As your eyes rake over your husband, you don’t know why he seems nervous, unable to stop the shake in his leg.

You reach your hand out, the denim of his pants rough under your skin as you stop the uneasy movement.

“I think what Rafe is trying to say, is he’s answered all of your questions, more than once,” you placate. “You seem to be wanting an answer he just doesn’t have.”

Rafe watches you, an appreciation shining in his eyes that he wouldn’t know how to voice to you.

“We would love to help any way we can. But he’s told you everything he knows.”

Shoupe mulls over your words, seeming almost annoyed that you’re making a good point.

“Fine,” he concedes, looking over both you and Rafe. “But if there’s anything you could possibly think of, you know where to find us,” he adds, standing up.

 “Of course,” you reply, showing them the way out.

“It’s important to us you find whoever did this,” you say, giving Rafe a pointed look, motioning toward the officers, needing him to show his support.

When he spots this, he nods. “Catch this guy before something else happens. Don’t put our tax dollars to waste.”

He keeps his eyes on Shoupe, his mouth fighting a smirk.

You don’t understand the exchange between the two men, Shoupe’s stare also heavy.

“That’s what we’re trying to do,” Shoupe finally retorts after a few tense moments. He’s the first one to look away, nodding toward you. “Have a good day, Mrs. Cameron.”

Once they’re gone, your eyes find your husband, brows pulled together.

“What was that about?” You ask, trying to find an explanation for his rude behavior.

“What?” Now his unpleasant mood is aimed at you, lips parted, brows matching yours, and you almost regret saying anything. “He’s wasting his time with me. He’s wasting my time. He could actually be out there, catching the person who did it.”

You take in his explanation, arms crossed, eyes glancing to the floor before meeting his.

“I get it. But they’re just doing their job,” you explain. “I mean Chase was murdered, Rafe. You know, the guy you used to see at work every day and liked to invite us over for dinner.”

You try to make it clear to him why he should think about someone besides himself.

He swallows at that, now it’s him who can’t meet your gaze.

You sigh, deciding it’s best to drop it. You know how Rafe is, how difficult it is for him to not only process his own emotions, but others as well.

You step closer, your hand finding his by his side, fingers threading together. You feel the cool touch of his gold, signet ring against your warm skin, along with his wedding ring.

He doesn’t move away, and you can’t help but think he looks like a scolded little boy as he finally looks up at you, hair failing into his eyes.

“I know this has been a lot for you,” you start. “You know you can always talk to me. About anything.”

You watch him, hoping he’ll finally open up to you about this whole situation.

Instead, he just nods, his hand falling from yours before he walks to the kitchen, finding his phone.

You have to stop yourself from sighing, showing your disappointment.

“I talked to my dad earlier,” he calls out, walking toward you with his phone in his hand. “He wants us over for dinner on Sunday. Something about wanting everyone together since Sarah’s back for the summer,” he mumbles the last part, and you can tell he’s trying his hardest not to roll his eyes.

“Oh, that should be nice. We haven’t been over there in a while.” You keep your tone optimistic, hoping it will influence his own outlook.

But by the look on Rafe’s face, it’s not working. He seems more distracted than anything else.

“I gotta take this,” he holds his phone up, excusing himself to his office upstairs.

You’re more than aware of Rafe’s strained relationship with his family. Part of you wants to tell him to forget about his father, thinking it would be best for him to release himself from the shackles of desperately vying for his father’s approval.

But you also know that this house didn’t pay for itself. Even if the name Cameron holds weight in certain places, you’d be lying if you said Rafe could get a job anywhere, especially as good as the one he has now.

You thought Rafe having to work for his father could only help the relationship, and it does seem like they’re friendlier to each other, Ward seeing his son as somewhat competent. But the pressure still lies on Rafe to be good enough.

So, all you can do is keep the peace.

Maybe you have your own motives to keep things nice between Rafe and his family. Sometimes, they feel like the only family you have, even if it’s a bit dysfunctional.

You’re an only child, and your parents decided when you moved out that they were going to spend most of their time on vacation, seeing the world they didn’t get to when you were growing up.

Right now, they’re on a Caribbean cruise, the last time you saw them being your wedding.

You miss them, but you don’t really blame them. Maybe you’ll feel the same one day, when your own children are grown up and married.

They were always extremely supportive of your relationship with Rafe, never seeing any issues. Their happiness at the possibility of their daughter marrying into the Cameron’s blinded them.

You’re glad they didn’t see the things you saw because they might not have been as forgiving. You saw firsthand how hard Rafe worked to clean up his addiction, and to stop the tendency to get into fights with Pogues.

But you wonder if they had known, would they have even batted an eye?

JJ doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to sitting in your kitchen. He thinks you’re only pretending not to notice how much he stands out, because you never seem bothered by it. You just smile as you hand him an ice-cold drink. This time, it’s iced tea.

You were folding laundry when you heard JJ slip into the backyard. This time, he didn’t put up a fight, letting you invite him in.

“So,” you say, sitting across from him at the kitchen table. “I heard Sarah’s back for the summer. Is she still with John B?”

“I thought you were her sister-in-law or whatever, wouldn’t you know?” He asks, taking a long sip of his drink.

“Yeah, well, Rafe and Sarah don’t really talk.”

JJ raises his eyebrows, humming, an understanding washing over his face.

“They’re still together. She’s over at The Chateau almost every day now,” he answers.

You smile, nodding. “So, you still see your friends a lot?”

You were pretty removed from the people Sarah started hanging out with during her high school years. They were younger…and they were Pogues. But you cared about her enough to want to know about her friends.

You also knew them for other reasons, ones having to do with a dumb rivalry stemming from your husband’s hatred of Pogues.

You never got to know any of them, talking to John B the most out of all of them.

Until now.

“Yeah. Everyone’s doing their own thing now, but we get together all the time,” he casually says.

“I’m glad to hear that. I remember you all being so close.”

“Hm.” He stops, his brow furrowing. “You remember that before or after we would get the shit kicked out of us by Rafe?”

Your smile falters, eyes finding the surface of the table.

Before you can say anything, he continues, “but he’s different now. So, I should just forget about it.”

Sarcasm drips from his tone, using your own words against you. He raises his eyebrows again, taking another sip, making his point.

“I never said you should forget about it,” you scoff. “I know what Rafe did was wrong. Do you hold what he did against Sarah too?”

“You can’t choose your family,” he shrugs. “I mean she barely talks to him as it is. You married him.” He pauses, blue eyes staring into you. “That means you looked at all that, and thought, I want to be with this guy for the rest of my life.”

He immediately begins to feel bad when you frown. He sighs, realizing he took it too far.

“I’m sorry, okay?” He apologizes bluntly. “You seem nice and all, I just can’t trust someone who’s married to Rafe Cameron,” JJ explains.

“You don’t have to trust me,” you level with him. “And I can apologize for all of Rafe’s wrongdoings over and over again, because I am sorry. But is that really going to make you feel better?”

He looks to his lap, bottom lip between his teeth. He knows you’re being sincere, your eyes genuinely curious.

“You’re right, there’s no point in holding it against you,” he admits quietly.

You nod, taking a moment before saying, “Good, because I actually like talking to you, for some reason,” you add the last part with a smile on your face.

“I don’t think I’ve ever heard anyone say that to me before,” he says with a smile, the same joking tone.

You’ve been to Tannyhill more times than you could count, and it never fails to impress you.

Rafe has told you more than once, usually when he has a few drinks in him, that one day it will be “ours.” You think it’s somewhat morbid that he’s waiting for the day his father can’t physically have it anymore. But you also can’t help but feel a glimmer of anticipation about being able to call it yours.

As you walk side by side, you can feel the nervousness radiating off of Rafe, even if he tries his hardest to stamp it down.

You say his name, stopping a few feet from the front door, turning toward him.

He looks at you, a question in his eyes.

Before he can say anything, you bring your hands to his firm chest, smoothing out the black polo shirt he’s wearing. You feel him let out a sigh.

“Babe-.”

You cut him off with a kiss, lashes fluttering against his cheek.

“I just wanted to do that before we went in there,” you quietly say against his lips when you break apart.

You get your satisfaction when his lips turn up into a smile.

But your attention is quickly moved when you hear the door creak open.

“Dad said to get the door,” Wheezie says timidly, eyes shifting around.

You meet Rafe’s eyes again, both of you hiding your laughs.

“Hi, Wheezie,” you greet, walking into the cool air of the house.

You hear Rafe say the same right behind you, shutting the door.

“Are you still taking me shopping before Midsummers?” She doesn’t waste a second to excitedly ask you. “Sarah’s too busy and I’d rather go with you than Rose.”

She grimaces at the mention of her stepmother.

“I’ve been looking forward to it. Why don’t we go sometime this week?”

You don’t notice how Rafe watches you make plans with his little sister, an indescribable emotion swimming in his blue eyes.

“We were wondering when you’d get here,” a booming voice announces.

Ward walks into the room with a grin on his face.

“How you doing, sweetheart?” he asks, pulling you into a hug.

“I’m doing good. Nice to see you, Ward,” you reply, still smiling.

As he steps away from you, you notice how Rafe shifts a little, standing up straighter.

“Hi, Dad.”

“Son,” is all Ward says, patting Rafe on the back, his smile more tight-lipped now.

They share a look, something wordless between them before Ward turns to you.

“Rose is in the kitchen, getting dinner ready. And Sarah should be down soon. I’m just going to borrow Rafe for a few minutes. I hope you don’t mind,” he checks with you, eyebrows raised.

“No, go ahead,” you nod, watching them head toward his office.

“I’ll go see what Sarah’s doing,” Wheezie says, also going upstairs, leaving you to wander into the kitchen.

It’s not uncommon for Ward to pull Rafe aside to have a conversation, usually about work. But the glance they gave each other was tense, a seriousness there that you don’t know the reason for.

“This looks delicious, Rose. You’ll have to give me the recipe,” you comment, staring at the sauce she’s stirring.

“My mother used to make this all the time. One of my favorites,” she remarks before being interrupted by Sarah barreling her way toward you.

“There’s my favorite sister-in-law,” she calls out, wrapping her arms around you.

“I’m your only sister-in-law,” you say, laughing, squeezing her back.

“Well, I still think if you really wanted to see me all the time, you didn’t have to marry Rafe to do it.” Amusement dances on her lips. “You could’ve saved yourself a lot of trouble,” she says, trying not to burst out laughing.

“What? You mean, I didn’t have to do that.” Your tone matches hers, and she’s the first one to laugh as you step away from the heat of the kitchen.

“So, tell me all about your first year at UNC?” You ask, eyes on her.

“It was good,” she says with a lack of truthfulness, her furrowed brow giving her away.

“Are you sure?”

She shakes her head, looking around to make sure she’s out of Rose’s earshot.

“I don’t know. I’m just not sure if college is for me,” Sarah says quietly. You nod and she continues, “I just would rather be doing something else with my life. Not being stuck in a classroom with a bunch of other rich kids who are just going to end up working for their fathers.”

You raise your eyebrows, the implication of her words not lost on you.

“Sorry,” she draws back. “That was harsh.”

“No, I get it. You want something different.”

“Yeah. And I want to be with people I actually like.”

“Like John B?”

An involuntary smile makes her lips twitch as she looks down, her cheeks turning rosy.

“Yes, like John B,” she admits, not fighting her smile anymore. “And before you say anything, I know what it sounds like,” she pauses, staring directly at you. “But I won’t be dropping out of college for a boy. It’s for a lot of reasons.”

“I mean, even if that were the case. I can’t really judge you, can I?” You ask, thinking of your own past, and how picking a school was completely dependent on Rafe. “I think you should do what makes you happy.”

“Can you explain that to my dad now?” She jokes, but her smile is appreciative, like it’s all she needed to hear.

Rafe didn’t say much by the time he came back from his dad’s office, just sitting down for dinner like everyone else. You want to ask him about it, but you know it’s best to let him tell you first.

You all eat under incandescent lighting from the chandelier, shining off the silverware and fine china. There has been slight small talk, but things shift when Ward clears his throat from the head of the table, setting down his fork.

“I just want to say, how grateful I am to have the whole family here, together. The year’s not even close to over, and I don’t know if I can express how proud I am.”

Emotion seeps through his words as his eyes rake over the table, everyone intently listens.

“Sarah just completed her first year at college, with straight A’s,” he adds, his smile only growing bigger. Sarah returns the expression, but you can see the slight insincerity to it.

“We also, officially, welcomed Y/N to the family. Of course, I would say she’s been part of this family for years.”

You sheepishly smile, catching Rafe’s eye.

“And Rafe,” he pauses, staring at his son. “Rafe has been working very hard in his position at Cameron Development. Harder than almost anyone, and I’m not just saying that.” He laughs a little. “That’s why, I’ve decided to make him Cameron Development’s new Chief Operating Officer.”

Your lips part with surprise, quickly turning into a smile as you put an arm around Rafe’s shoulders, placing a kiss on his cheek.

“I’m so proud of you,” you whisper, catching the happiness in his eyes.

“I won’t let you down,” he tells his dad.

Wheezie smiles, thinking it must be a big deal, Sarah doesn’t look impressed, and Rose just casually sips her wine.

“Now, I’m not saying I’m expecting any, but maybe an announcement about a grandchild before the end of the year would be nice,” Ward says, half-jokingly.

Your first instinct is to tense up, even if you try not to, your arm moving so just your palm lies on Rafe’s back.

“I think that very well could happen,” Rafe practically promises.

Your face falls a little, trying to keep a sense of lightheartedness in your voice.

“Well, maybe not this year.”

Rafe turns to you at that, giving you a look only you can see. But he bites his tongue from saying anything.

Ward doesn’t push further, saying he’s happy as long as he gets a grandchild. But the damage is done, Rafe not meeting your eyes for the rest of dinner.

Another silent car ride, this time, you can feel the minutes pass by. Rafe doesn’t say a word to you, and honestly, you’re grateful, knowing you don’t want to argue while he’s behind the wheel.

You dread the moment you get home, but at this point, you should be angrier than he is.

He’s still not talking to you when you get home, setting his things down before going upstairs.

He’s almost casual in his actions, but you can tell by the tightness of his jaw and how he can’t look at you, that he’s upset.

You follow him upstairs, repeating his name.

“Rafe,” you call out. “You’re going to have to talk to me. You can’t just give me the silent treatment.”

You find him in the bedroom you two share, slipping off his shoes.

He finally looks at you, and his eyes are ablaze.

“Did you have to say that?” He bitterly asks.

“Say what? The truth?” Your tone matches his. “I just don’t understand why you’re mad. Do you really not want your family to know we’re waiting?”

His teeth sink into his bottom lip, like he doesn’t believe what you’re saying.

“It’s embarrassing, Y/N,” he spits out.

“Embarrassing?” You ask, unsure if you heard him correctly. “It’s embarrassing that your wife gets to decide when she wants to have a baby?”

“That’s not what I meant.” He shakes his head but doesn’t explain further.

“Then what do you mean?” You press.

“It-It’s embarrassing that it looks like we’re not on the same page,” he finally explains, flexing his fingers.

“I agree, Rafe. Then why did you say that? Why did you agree with him when you know I want to wait?”

“Exactly. You want to wait.”

You’re left speechless by his implication, lip almost trembling while you take in his words. This is the first time you’re hearing of this, but you realize certain comments you brushed off might have meant he wanted a baby sooner than later.

“Honestly, it sounds like you don’t want kids at all,” he continues. His face is twisted up, pacing back and forth away from you.

“What?” You ask, your brows knitted together. “I do, you know I do. I just want to be able to grow my career before we have any. You know that.”

“What career?”

You start to feel your chest getting tighter.

“What?”

“You sit at a computer a few times a week. How is that stopping you from having a baby?”

You can feel your eyes starting to sting, not being able to remember a time where Rafe said something so hurtful to you.

“Rafe…” You start.

He shrugs his shoulders. “It sounds like an excuse to me.”

You shake your head, eyes getting glassy.

“Just because you got promoted, doesn’t mean you get to tell me my job doesn’t mean anything.” Rage runs through your voice. “And I hate to say it, but you only have that job for one reason. At least I got my job through my own hard work.”

As soon as the words leave your mouth, regret fills you.

Somehow his eyes harden even more as he steps closer to you.

“You mean the job you barely get any money from?” He asks, getting closer until you have no choice but to step back, your body hitting the wall behind you. “Remind me, who paid for this house? Or for your clothes? Or for-for that stupid soap you insist on ordering from France?”

He’s almost spitting in your face as you feel your shoulders dig into the wall.

“Who paid for all of that?” His voice is loud as he asks again, his fingers still flexing and unflexing as you look up at him with tearful eyes.

It feels like an eternity before you answer.

“Your father,” you rasp out.

You watch in fear as he takes a step back from you, his breathing getting rougher before his fist collides with the wall next to your head.

You flinch, moving your face away as you feel his arm almost graze you.

Tears fall freely from your eyes as he tries to steady his breathing, glancing at his red knuckles.

Finally, you see the realization hit him, his eyes softening at your cowering figure right next to the hole in the wall he made.

“Y/N-.” He begins, stepping closer to you.

“Don’t,” you yell, holding up a hand and stopping him.

He tries to say something, but you speak instead.

“Just go away,” you urge him, and after a moment, he does, leaving you at the scene of the crime.

Tags:

@fangirlwithlou @thebuttofcaptainamerica @lovedetlost @kkmstblog @whorefordrew @gillybear17 @alinaharlow @coriellesmarya

Let me know if you want to be added or removed from the taglist for this series!

[rotworld]

19: Fairy Tale

art by @exorbitantsqueakingnoises

you've forgotten your wild night at a fae festival a week ago, but it remembers you.

->original work. explicit; contains non-con, (magical) drugging/date rape, graphic descriptions of violence, terato, feral behavior, hard vore.

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.

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Your day has been going suspiciously well. 

Despite being a ball of nerves the night before, you wake early and well-rested. Your morning commute is a comfortable train ride and leisurely walk through perfect autumn crispness, the air cool and the leaves colorful. Even the communal breakroom snacks are shockingly delicious today, an assortment of artful chocolate-drizzled, fruit-topped and sugar-powdered pastries almost too pretty to eat, although your coworkers have already decimated the macarons by the time you get there.

Then again, maybe there’s nothing suspicious about it. You’ve been overly cautious ever since the Equinox Faire for reasons that are far too embarrassing to explain to anyone else. You’d have to admit you went to the Faire in the first place—which is fine, by the way, there's nothing wrong with going to a Faire, it’s just not the kind of thing you feel like casually mentioning to your coworkers—and then you’d have to mention that you don’t even remember half of it. Drank so much you got violently ill and then stumbled home by some miracle, waking up in a daze on your living room floor. 

You think something bad happened there, or almost did. Hard to say for sure. Everything’s a blur after sunset. There was live music and handicrafts and some of the most incredible food you’ve ever tasted, sweet, savory, still sizzling fresh off the grill. You met people, danced, partied hard, lost a shoe. Kind of a shame, those were your most comfortable pair of sandals. You have the distinct impression that you hooked up with someone, or tried to. Getting sick in the grass might’ve cut things short. But you woke up with the worst hangover of your life and twenty browser tabs open on your phone with searches like “howf to kno if you rhome for real not a trick/?” and “magic itw ont come off what do u do whenkmlj that happen” and most ominously, “get uncursed.” 

You have no idea what happened or with who, but you do remember that unpleasant tugging sensation the morning after like you were wearing an extra, ill-fitted layer of skin. The internet says that particular blend of bleary exhaustion, lightheadedness and the tactile static of invisible cobwebs is a pretty common sign of residual magic. Someone tried casting a clingy spell, something meant to linger on a person for a while, but it sloughed off for some reason. You’ve been braced every day since for something catastrophic to happen. So far, nothing has. Maybe it was the hangover after all, or maybe it was something you drank. Some people have bad reactions to enchanted wine. You certainly weren’t going slow enough to notice. 

So despite a persistent sense of unease, malaise and waiting for the other shoe to drop so palpable you can barely sit still, you tell you coworkers you’re doing “Great!” and join the pastry huddle by the breakroom counter.

“Is it somebody’s birthday? Who brought these?” James asks, staring contemplatively into the cream filling of his second chocolate eclair. “They’re so good. Like, too good. Are they supposed to be here?” 

Francine shrugs. “Too late now. If DeVries comes out of his office looking for these, he’s gonna have to fight me to death for this tiramisu.”

Harper picks up the half-empty box of cannoli and turns it around a few times before she finds a logo in one of the corners. Her eyes widen. “Seelie Confectionaries. Holy shit, this is expensive.”

“It’s fae food?” James stops chewing abruptly, holding the eclair away from his face like it might bite. “Is it safe? What if it’s enchanted?” 

“It’s for sure enchanted. Not like that, though. It’s just for taste.” Harper shrugs and grabs a cannoli. “I took a fae studies class forever ago. ‘Enchanted’ just means there’s magic in it. All the stuff they ship across the Veil is super strictly regulated—”

“Holy shit. Who is that?” Francine asks. She’s staring past all of you, looking at the breakroom TV on the back wall where the news has been playing at an inaudible murmur. It’s midday and there’s no bright red “BREAKING NEWS” label at the bottom so you’re expecting something inconsequential; local sports, small business puff pieces, cats being cute. You’re not prepared to see the most beautiful man alive smiling serenely into the camera. He’s standing in a park beside a starstruck reporter who can’t stop sneaking glances out of the corner of her eye. He sticks out against a backdrop of college students and dog-walkers in a double-breasted vest made of shimmering brocade, dark green with silver buttons and intricate floral patterns. The long-sleeved dress shirt underneath is shiny black silk with lace at the ends of the sleeves. His hair is midnight blue and long enough to pull back into a neat bun at the base of his neck, the silver pin holding it in place shaped like a wilting rose.

Long lashes, smokey blue eyeshadow, bright amber eyes—you’re getting the itch of deja vu in the back of your brain. Haven’t you seen this guy before?

“Goth or demon fresh out of conservatory?” James wonders. “Take your bets.” 

Harper squints at the TV. “Neither. He’s fae. See the brooch? That’s a guise stabilizer.” 

She’s right. It’s pinned to his left lapel, a silver circle of delicate metalwork and tiny pearls. You can barely see the green flecks pressed and preserved inside the rounded glass in the middle, but they’re definitely tiny leaves. 

Then he’s gone and there’s a slow panning shot of an open field instead. A field that looks eerily familiar, you think. Francine searches frantically for the remote because the caption at the bottom hasn’t changed: “SOCIALITE’S SEARCH FOR LOVE SPARKS NATIONAL SHOE-SHOPPING FRENZY.”

“What do you suppose that means?” Harper muses.

“Not a fucking clue,” James says. “Isn’t that the fairgrounds?”

“Ohhh, I think you’re right! Wasn’t that big festival thing going on out there last weekend?” Francine asks. 

Harper snorts. “You mean the orgy?” You choke on a bite of bread.

“No way,” James says.

“Okay, it’s not literally an orgy but there’s a lot of sex. That’s like half the reason people go.”

“Isn’t it dangerous? Like, super dangerous? With all the enchanted food and stuff.” 

“James, listen, enchantment like the way you’re thinking isn’t something you just sprinkle in real quick. It’s a whole process. They have to know who you are and want to fuck with you specifically—”

Francine nudges you in the side. “You ever heard of anything like this?”

“Absolutely never in my whole life,” you say, coughing.

The camera cuts again and the beautiful man is back again, speaking into the microphone. Francine finds the remote just in time and starts cranking up the volume until you can actually hear what he’s saying. “…don’t often attend events of this nature very often, as you might imagine. But something was different this year. I felt uniquely compelled, as though something was waiting for me…”

Harper makes a joke about him being uniquely compelled by his dick but you’re no longer paying attention to the breakroom conversation. It’s like a dam breaks in your mind. Glimpses and snapshots suddenly come rushing back just from hearing his voice. The night was warm and flickering. Your eyes met across a bonfire. He wore nothing but full-bloom flowers and colorful, rumpled lichen, the forest wrapped around him in winding stripes like a lover’s grasping fingers. His hair was down, waist-length, a woven cord of flowering, leafy vines crowning his head. His hips swayed and his fingers curled under your chin, drawing your gaze up to meet his. 

“My name is Imraude,” he said in a low, seductive purr. “And you are going to be mine.” 

On TV, the camera zooms out slightly to get both him and the reporter in frame when she tilts the microphone back to ask a question. Your attention is drawn immediately to his hands, not resting at his sides but holding something the tender, gentle way a person holds a priceless glass sculpture or a kitten.

That’s a sandal. That’s your sandal. Uh oh, you think.

“And this is all you have to work with?” the reporter asks.

Imraude chuckles. “Yes, this is it. It’s common practice to use aliases or nicknames at a Faire and I don’t begrudge them for being cautious. It does make this much more difficult, though. I know how absurd these public appeals must seem, but I truly am desperate. I would do anything to see them again. We had something special, and I think they know it, too.” 

It was lust at first sight. He was gorgeous, and he must’ve thought you were, too. You drifted back to the refreshments table together to chat and make sure you were both on the same page and his hand settled on your thigh. He was insistent—relentless—that you eat something. “I intend to keep you as long as I can,” he murmured. “You’ll need your strength.” It should’ve been fine. Faire food gets inspected. But did those buttery pieces of bread he pressed against your lips come from the feast on the table or somewhere else? What about those fresh, juicy berries, sweet and tart as he fed them into your mouth with his tongue? You were already tipsy at least and he told you the arcadian wine was the finest vintage you’d ever taste. You were in his lap, you think. You were eating out of his hand and he was purring praise in your ear when everything started to blur. 

“In some ways,” the reporter says, snapping you out of a daze, “your strategy has backfired, hasn’t it? Saying you’re looking for the owner of the other shoe has a lot of eager bachelors and bachelorettes snapping up the exact same design. Stores across the country have completely exhausted their stock.” Unbelievable images of local shoe stores with empty spaces in the sandal section fade in one after the other, followed by online listings going for tens of thousands of dollars. You can’t believe what you’re saying. They’re not some designer brand. They’re just what you had lying around for a night out when you wanted to be comfortable and blend in with the easygoing atmosphere.

“I’m not worried about it,” Imraude assures her. He looks directly into the camera and you stop breathing. “They were unforgettable. When I see their face, I’ll know.”

You remember now. The meadow—not the fairgrounds. He brought you somewhere else. You’d looked up at the sky and even inebriated, even giggling and stumbling and feeling a little sick to your stomach, you’d noticed it wasn’t right. You could barely see it, could barely see straight at all, but you remember how your skin crawled when you looked up and couldn’t recognize the thing you saw every night. Imraude kissed you. He licked into your mouth and clutched your hips against his, and you moaned into his mouth. You tried to touch him—to pull him closer? To push him away? You remember wanting him so badly it scared you. 

But you couldn’t move. Why couldn’t you move? Your arms were stuck in the air above your head and your legs wouldn’t budge. Imraude stroked your shoulders and caressed your sides and dug his fingers into your ass—all at the same time. That doesn’t make sense. You were drunk and it was dark. Is that it? It feels like you’re still forgetting something. 

“Don’t be afraid,” he said. You remember that. Such a gentle whisper right against your ear, but he was rough with you. He grasped you too hard with fingers that were too sharp and too many. He wanted to leave marks. “Ones only we can see,” he promised, smiling against the nervous flutter of your pulse. “So the hungry ones know who you belong to.” He bit you, over and over and over again. Sunk his fangs in—his fangs? Too sharp to be teeth, too thin and precise. It felt sharp and horrible, and then it faded to prickling pins and needles. Tactile static. Tingling, then numb, then good. 

No one has ever fucked you as hard as him. If you’re lucky, no one ever will again. The more you think about it, the more you wonder how you managed to walk away. He was right up against you, fucking you standing. You couldn’t make your body do anything but he was in complete control. He curled his fingers and your legs wrapped around his waist, and then he was thrusting fast enough to knock the breath out of your lungs. His hands cupped your ass and he panted in your ear about how he would fill you every morning, day and night for the rest of time. 

“I will have you,” he murmured. “Your body first. Then your mind. Then your heart.”

He made you ride him. He watched you bounce on his cock while his long, spindly fingers explored the expanse of your chest, groping, caressing, teasing your nipples. He lingered whenever he found something that made you gasp and clench around him, mercilessly exploiting every weakness. You were barely conscious. Your eyelids fluttered and struggled to stay upright. He didn’t care. He tugged your wrist to his mouth and sank his fangs in. 

Or did he bite down, and tear a whole chunk of flesh from your body? He couldn’t have. You don’t have a scar there, not even a puncture. But you remember pain, searing, radiating, the rhythmic sting every time your heart pumped and more blood gushed out, and the redness of his lips as he drank everything that poured out with a groan. 

He fucked you on the forest floor. Had he always been so much bigger than you? You were face-down, your back arched and your hips raised while he pounded into you, a hand on the nape of your neck and a hand on your shoulder and a hand on your hip and a hand stroking your side and more still that are just ghosts of memory. You were bleeding. You were raw and aching everywhere. He was devouring you and you were on the verge of climax with every crunching, flesh-tearing bite. Your stomach churns thinking about it. Was that real, or a nightmare? It’s so vivid in your mind. 

Imraude, with your ankles hooked over his shoulders. He bent you in half so he could kiss you while he rutted slow and deep. 

Imraude, with your neck between his teeth. You trembled and you wept and your head lolled back against his shoulder when his tongue dipped into the wound. 

Imraude, with hands uncountable. He handled you like a doll, a plaything meant for nothing more than his amusement and pleasure. 

Imraude, with—you can’t remember. It hurts to try. You think you saw something you weren’t supposed to. He didn’t make sense. When you saw the haunting, animalistic gleam of reflected moonlight, was that in just two eyes or in four? In six? In more?

He liked to finish inside you. Clutching you by the thighs and hips and stomach and shoulders, he impaled you on a long, thick cock with bumps and ridges and a slender tip that reached uncomfortably deep, and he came for such a long time that you thought you’d never be empty again. Thick, white seed squelched around his length and dripped down your inner thighs as he kept humping and grinding into your trembling body. 

His voice didn’t sound human. It hadn’t since he lured you away from the fairgrounds. It was warped and echoing in your head, unnaturally deep and lightly melodic. “Does it feel good to belong to me?” he purred. “If it doesn’t yet…it will. I promise.”

You should be dead. You’re sure of it. You were more wounds than flesh when he filled you one last time. You shivered and you oozed. Imraude’s tongue filled your mouth as he pulled out one horrible, stinging inch at a time, slipping free from your abused entrance with a sickening squelch and a trickle of cum. He smoothed his palms over all the places you hurt and stole the pain. You felt distinctly that it wasn’t right. It wasn’t real healing. You had gaping holes inside of you, places where he’d stolen something. And then—he left you. Said he’d “prepare the way,” or something like that. The air quivered like a heat haze and then he was gone. 

You rolled onto your side, heaving and retching, clutching your stomach. You tasted bile and acid. Everything you’d eaten at the refreshment table came back up in a stinging watercolor slurry. You felt awful. You wanted to curl up and rot. Fear drove you, hand over hand, one bruised knee and then the other. You crawled out of the meadow. You don’t know where you went or how long it took you to get there, but you knew you had to keep moving. There’s a chasm of time missing; of horrible, furious noises that made the forest shake and the scrape of your fingers through dirt, on and on until they found concrete. You’ll probably never remember everything he did trying to chase you down, but it didn’t matter. With all the food out of your system, the enchantment didn’t stick. He could purr and plead and growl all he wanted, but you were going home. 

“No fucking way,” Francine says. “This can’t be real. His one night stand was gone when he woke up, so now he’s on the news? Make a Craigslist post like a normal person.” 

“He’s rich,” Harper reasons. “Probably paid them to air it. A lot of the fae who end up at the Faire are rich kids from old money. Kind of crazy his family runs that Seelie snack company, though. You think he’s sending out gift boxes everywhere, or does he think his Cinderella works here?”

James tosses his eclair into the trash. “Nope. Too fucking weird. Not eating any more of these.”

You stop chewing. With a sick feeling churning in your stomach, you take another look at the pastry boxes. They’re not in pristine condition anymore, but you see the fanciful wrapping paper crumpled in the trash and the ribbons that had been tied around them. There’s a card in there, too, thoughtlessly discarded. Your name is not on that card.

But your nickname—the one you used at the Faire—is, along with a black heart. 

“You okay?” Harper asks. She’s looking at you. They’re all looking, with worry and confusion. 

You don’t even make an excuse. You just run. Out of the breakroom, through the hall, flinging yourself down the stairs two at a time until you hit the bottom, trying to figure out what comes next. You go home, right? Then what? Pack a bag and go on the run? It’s a coincidence. It’s a wild guess. He can’t know. You emerge in the company lobby where a small circle of people from another department are clustered around the receptionist’s desk chattering excitedly. You see a figure taller than the others. Dark blue hair. Bright yellow eyes. A smile that snags at your heart like a fish hook.

He turns towards you and you catch the briefest glimpse of that wild, possessive hunger you saw the Faire. 

“Darling,” he purrs, your missing sandal clutched in one hand. “It’s so nice to see you again.”

[wangxianficrecs]

Follower Recs

~*~

for the summer recs!! written by our lovely mod kay!! - Anon

[Kay: Thank you so much! I really appreciate it!! 💙]

A heartwrenching start for this series, where Lan Zhan has to deal with the truth regarding his mother's death, and his feelings regarding his family and brother for keeping such information from him, and being responsible for her situation, one way or another.

Personally, Lan Wangji having to deal with the pitfalls of his sect rules, philosophy and behavior is one of my favorite kinds of angst, that can be explored in some many different ways, and I would like to see more.

close the door behind me, i'm leaving

by thelastdboy (@thelastdboyy)

M, 3k, Lan Wangji

Summary: “Wangji,” his uncle began and came over to where Lan Wangji stood. “You have grown up. I am proud of the man you have become,” Lan Qiren said, unusually sentimental – another fact that made alarm bells ring inside Lan Wangji's mind. From the inside of his jacket, his uncle pulled an inconspicuous envelope and handed it to Lan Wangji. “You're old enough to learn the truth about your parents. You mother wrote this letter to you before her death. Your brother wanted me to wait a little a longer until I give this to you, but it is time,” he explained and stepped outside as well.

~*~

The follow up of Lan Wangji's turmoil surrounding his sect, brings him to Yiling, where he finds mysterious and unorthodox Wei Wuxian.

In a masterfully done transposition of the mdzx worldbuilding into a modern setting, Lan Zhan has to battle with his presumptions and prejudices and his continuous desires when it comes to Wei Wuxian ft. Xiao Xingchen and Song Lan with mentions of or favorite yiling siblings Wen Qing and Wei NIng.

An honorable mention for the author's delightful worldbuilding regarding the Burial Mounds and Wei Wuxian, which comes in various of their works and I'm always so excited to see explored.

on my wei

by thelastdboy (@thelastdboyy)

M, 23k, Wangxian & Songxiao

Summary: The driver fell silent for a moment, as if remembering something unpleasant. “The Yiling Laozu is still driving through this area though. You're a cultivator, right? You dress like one anyway. Then maybe try to reach him. He was one too. Earned his money as a driver though. Died during the earthquake. Now he's haunting the streets. Some say, he messed around with the Burial Mounds and that caused the earthquake! I mean, aren't we unfortunate enough already here in Yiling? What are the chances that a quake hits here of all places?" (Or: in the aftermath of an earthquake, the Burial Mounds start spreading and the cultivation world turns a blind eye, but Lan Wangji cannot.)

~*~

(Please REBLOG as a signal boost for this hard-working author if you like – or think others might like – these stories.)

[banjjakz]

➡ Fall asleep.

When you blink back into consciousness, a gentle warmth welcomes you to the land of the living. At some point in your slumber, you pitched sideways to huddle your achingly cold bones in a fetal position. Now, you find yourself struggling to activate your joints after succumbing to a slumber so deep it’s seemed to have left you with rigor mortis.

As you sit up, an unfamiliar layer of fuzzy fabric slides from your shoulders. A blanket! Ah, that explains the extra warmth. But you don’t remember bringing a blanket with you… and you’ve never seen this particular blanket in your entire life. Sure, it’s cozy and high-quality, but the pattern of wide-open eyes littered across the black cloth is off-putting – although, not entirely unpleasant.

Oh shoot, did someone put this on you? Have you been discovered?

“Hello.”

Spooked, you whip your head to the side, where you had not even registered the presence of another living being. “Ahh!!!”

“I did not mean to frighten you. I apologize.”

Are you – are you dreaming?

You must be dreaming. They term isn’t “yumejoshi” for no reason. There is no way Choso squats in front of you, less than a meter away, so close that you can smell his earthy, metallic fragrance. He hasn’t even changed out of his stage costume: his customary white robes are still soaked through with sweat from the earlier performance, gracing the pale fabric a tantalizing semi-translucence. His purple gi is nowhere to be found, which exposes the unholy caverns of his collarbones, the inviting jut of his skeletal sternum. The signature pigtails are also undone, leaving his stringy black hair to metastasize down the sides of his gaunt face, across the barren valley of his jagged shoulder blades. And yet, that solid bar of black remains perfectly applied across the center of his face.

“…Nn?”

“Are you alright?”

Choso stays where he is, head cocked in concern. Quickly, you realize you have two options.

You can tell the truth and admit that you’d been waiting outside just to see him walk a few paces before getting into a nondescript vehicle. Totally normal fan behavior that will definitely go over well.

Or, you can lie.

“I-I don’t have anywhere else to go,” you demure, casting your eyes down in false bashfulness. You would feel bad about this if you were a better person.  “And the memories from ShinShow’s performances always sustain me…I just thought, if I could enjoy the positive energy for a little while longer…I would be sustained. I’m sorry…”

“Why do you apologize?”

One of Choso’s most appealing charming points is his overly formal, somewhat antiquated manner of speaking. He sounds like a historical figure who has been yanked from the past, inserted haphazardly into contemporary pop culture. Very fitting for his lore. But you’d also been under the assumption that this was merely a stage act – is he that committed to his image? Or is it innate?

The thought of Choso simply being Like That is too endearing to bear. You hide your face behind your palms, concealing the tremulous smile that possesses your lips.

“It’s embarrassing… and I’ve troubled Choso-nii…”

The last thing you expect are cold, impossibly cold, hands to wrap around your wrists, kindly (but firmly) uncovering your face. Choso has drawn closer to you, so close that when he breathes, it brushes the bridge of your nose.

His face is impassive, as usual – but upon closer inspection, you notice a strange, wavering quality in his eyes, a slight tremor in his lips. There might actually be color on the tips of his ears. Usually, he appears as though he is so pale there is no blood coursing through his veins that could produce a blush.

Evidently, this is not the case.

“Choso-nii is not troubled,” he states plainly, leaving no room for argument. “The night is no place for a little one to be sleeping unguarded.”

Oh, you could faint here and now. It’s an active choice on your part to remain conscious. “Mn…”

“You will come with me now.”

And so you do.

This is how you find yourself in the back of an unmarked, utilitarian white van. To anyone else the vehicle would appear as little more than a maintenance truck. But you know better.

Inside the living-quarters is a mish-mash of discarded clothing items in varying degrees of cleanliness; discarded guitar picks; empty takeout containers; and a random jumble of electronic chargers. Inexplicably, there is also an abundance of first-aid supplies, with over half of it apparently already used. As he sits you down on one of the distressed leather seats, Choso uses the medical kit to tend to a few scrapes on your legs and arms earned from your impromptu nap on the concrete.

“It’s really not that bad…You don’t have to—”

“Enough.”

Embarrassed, you shut your mouth. How do you even cope with this situation? Here you are, in the back of your oshi’s travel van, as he sits on his knees in front of you, hands impatiently pushing your clothes away to reveal your bare skin. His touch leeches the body heat out of you like a parasite. You want to be sucked dry.

“This will sting.” That’s all the warning you get before hydrogen peroxide is unceremoniously dumped on your fresh scrapes.

Unbidden, you let out a strangled whine, hands flying to the closest part of him you can reach – which happens to be his head. You clutch at his hair to absolve you of your suffering. “Choso-nii! It hurts!”

Ker-thlunk. Glug… glug… glug…

Fuck! Your spasming must have knocked over the hydrogen peroxide…. the upended bottle spills its guts across the floor, drenching the air in an oppressively medicinal stink.

Oddly, no irritancy mars Choso’s features. If anything, he looks more flustered than you feel, which doesn’t make much sense to you.

“I’m so sorry! I c-can clean it up, I promise---”

“Leave it.” He speaks without meeting your eyes. “You are injured.”

Barely, you want to retort. But acknowledging the fact that your so-called “injuries” are very minor surface scrapes would shatter the illusory bubble of realized fantasy into which you have miraculously stumbled.

Before you can reply, Choso continues: “The human mouth is the fastest-healing part of the body. Saliva heals.”

“Okay,” you say, because there is nothing else you could possibly respond with. He can’t mean—surely, he doesn’t—

But there he goes, leaning in close to the supple flesh of your bared leg, breath ghosting along the very surface, raising the hairs that quiver in eager anticipation. “I said I would help you feel better. Please allow me this. It is my duty.”

And then he begins to suck on your wounds.

“Oh-kay,” you squeal, entirely convinced that you have begun to astral project. The scrape on the inside of your knee is laved over by his tongue, which is, strangely, just as chilled as the rest of him. When his eyes flick up at your exclamation, you realize that you have yet to release his hair.

Nor do you want to.

“B-be gentle, please…” You’re laying it on thick. You know it. How could you resist? He’s eating it up – literally – mouthing repeatedly over the sensitive area as though he is spiritually compelled to do so. And just because you’re a little too observant, a little too greedy for your own good, you decide to push your luck: “Will Choso-nii make me feel better everywhere?”

With a wet pop, he unleashes your leg from his wet, red mouth. “Where does it hurt,” he asks, pupils blown wide, nothing more than a twin pair of black holes.

“Mn…all over…I’m sore, from sleeping on the ground…”

Choso rises from his knees to crowd you into the back of the seat. Of course, you willingly melt back, pliant in the wake of his potent desire.

“Do you need Choso-nii to make it better?”

“Please,” you whimper, peering up at him through your dewy, tear-damp lashes.

Holy shit, you can’t believe this actually worked. Two hours ago, you were just one of hundreds of faceless, sweaty fans, screaming their hearts out to some of the most hauntingly morbid lyrics.

And now, you are caged in the unforgiving embrace of your oshi, completely at his mercy, littered in hickeys and lovebites and bruises as he has his way with you. Your sharp cries of pain do the opposite of dissuade him; with each groan and plea for him to slow down, take a pause, ow, ow, it hurts Choso-nii--, he grows all the more impassioned, all the more frantic.

He only pulls away from you when there is not a single inch of exposed skin left for him to mark. The sound of your comingled pants fill the van, fogging the windows with physical evidence of your salacious tryst.

Neither of you speak for a moment, content to simply gaze into each other’s eyes. His hair is frazzled every which way, due in no small part to your rough handling. Is it normal to be turned on by such a trainwreck of a human? Should you really be wet between the thighs at being mauled?

“Do—” his voice cracks in a way you have never heard before, not on any livestream, not in any video, not on any stage. “Do you feel better, now?”

Maybe it’s fate…maybe, somewhere out there, far, far away, there is a benevolent being who wants nothing but the best for you. Maybe they concentrated their divine powers into finding you, in this moment, and directing your gaze to the loose pocketknife innocently resting on the grimy floor next to his clunky black platforms. In this moment, as you pick up the blade, unsheathing it without breaking eye contact with the ghoulish specter hovering above you, an inexplicable wave of love and appreciation washes over you, bathing your half-dressed body in the warm waters of some distant, far-off shore.

It's almost too easy to slice a surface wound – a cat-scratch, really – into the plush swell of your upper thigh.

“What about here, Choso-nii?” You ask, enraptured by the peculiar twitching of his facial muscles. “Can you kiss it better right here?”

Once again, you are right on the money.

Choso dives to chase the rivulet of blood running down your leg like a man stumbling across an oasis in the desert. Devotionally, he tongues at the gory slit, sucking more blood from your self-inflicted wound, moaning as if he is the one being pleasured right now. In a strange way, you think he might be.

Your initial quick-thinking unleashes an outlandish chain reaction which finds you, inevitably, entirely unclothed with a not-insignificant amount of reddening slashes across your naked form. When it’s all said and done, Choso will tend to each and every cut, diligently disinfecting and dressing the disrupted flesh, allowing you to weakly tug at his hair (now pulled back from his face into two twin pigtails) when it burns.

Upon the final swipe of antibacterial ointment, you are halfway in dreamland, barely cognizant enough to recognize that you should probably be getting the hell out of here, at this point. However, shunning reason and common sense is the exact behavior that’s gotten you this far – so you decide to stick to what you know.

“Choso-nii,” you murmur groggily into the leather seat. “Blanket?”

“What blanket?”

His confusion is confusing you. “The one you gave me… ‘s cold…”

“…I did not give you a blanket.” For the first time since he’d picked you up behind the venue, Choso’s voice sounds grounded in reality. Released from the shackles of lust and taboo desire, he speaks with lucid candor. “Was that blanket not yours?”

“Nope,” you hum, blissfully dazed. “Where ‘s ‘t?”

Sleep descends upon your worn, battered form before you hear his answer.

Oh well. As long as Choso-nii is nearby, you have nothing to worry about.

[ROUTE CLEAR.]

next suggested route: okkotsu yuuta

> main menu > prologue > guide

> report an issue

[onesaltyhunter]

Sleep Token x Gender Neutral!Reader HCs

what type of inhuman creatures would they be?

Side note: I've never made one of these before so props to all those people who make these regularly--they're difficult for my 3 brain cells to pop out something in return

VESSEL (I)

VAMPIRE

Protective, yet kind and passionate (he's also moderately awkward but we love that for him)

Tried his best to use his special "mind powers" to make you attracted to him after years of jokingly flirting with you

(It didn't work lmao)

He's still a hopeless romantic so he tried again

it still didn't work but you ended up falling for him anyway (he still believes that it worked)

Has an undeniable urge to hold onto you in some way, whether it may be an arm around your shoulder, waist--holding hands, and even the occasional fumbling with each other's fingers when walking somewhere

he's cold. like SO FUCKING COLD.

You used to jump at how freezing he was to the touch, but you've gotten used to it (for the most part)

If you decide to go to one of their shows and someone looks at you for a split second with even the slightest look of disgust/infatuation, Vessel with put the fear of God into them

He wouldn't tell you what he did, but, you could easily figure it out

bro is HORNY like ON GOD

II

WERECAT

kinda shy--very cuddly though

yeah sure they have a "Holy duty to be constantly awake" but sometimes, II feels a bit eepy

either very energetic or very tired, no in-between

Can barely hold back the urge to wrap his arms around you and nuzzle your neck (even if you're taller than him)

Acts like he needs some alone time every once in a while (lies)

Doesn't really know how to explain to you that he wants to spend more time with you--doesn't want to come off as clingy

Has literally overslept cuddled up to you and nearly missed a show because of it--loves violating his duty to Sleep if it means he can spend more time with you

It doesn't feel like he has to ask to "accidentally" pass out on you, bypassing any means of attempting to ask you if it's alright

You'd always be okay with it though, unless you were nommin on a snack and it felt weird to see him schlumped over your thigh, snoring--which felt weird but eh, its just II being II

After you found out what he was, you jokingly called him a "catboy"

The weird stare off lasted a solid minute

II was a little weirded out by the fact that you were unphased by your reaction to him telling you that he is a LITERAL monster

III

WEREWOLF

sorry if you thought he was going to be some big strong werewolf man--he has the personality of a golden retriever

Needs hugs (SHOW HIM SOME AFFECTION LIKE 24/7 PLS HE NEEDS IT)

VERY ENERGETIC

Fuckin loves running around like a maniac with you on off-days or even after a show

You still wonder how he has the energy to do stuff after bouncing about and toying with Vessel on stage

Will NOT hesitate on making a scene if it looks like someone is harassing you

Will (attempt) stop the ENTIRE SHOW and jump down into the crowd and shove them

if he can't, well--let's just say that he had a very unpleasant snack that night

Comes back acting as if nothing happened

IV

FAE

very chill (as per usual)

loves to dance around

you came home to him jamming out on his own and all of your seemingly dying house plants started living again

(Bro forgot he can do that 💀)

will dance with you until the middle of the night (goblin behavior but we love him fr)

loves taking you to botanical gardens

can't stop bringing you flowers (like no he really can't stop, it almost a problem)

another hugger (you want to hug him--you NEED TO)

[mikuni14]

15 Day BL Challenge - Day 11

Day 11: Breakup That Should've Stayed Broken Up

No surprise here: Last Twilight The last two episodes were just awful, the way Mhok was treated was highly unfair. He didn't deserve it.

Love Area At first I really liked this series and the main couple. When the traditional in BL series fight (only Valen screamed, while Kaitoon stood with a broken heart trying to explain the misunderstanding) and breakup happened, I was unpleasantly surprised by Valen's aggressive and mean behavior. I can't imagine reconciling and getting back together with that person, but of course the series did it. Kaitoon deserved someone as calm, hard-working and nice as he himself.

Privately, I also think that Pluem in Ghost Host, Ghost House deserved a better boyfriend and I didn't like that they got back together after a stupid, unnecessary, painful for Pluem break up - and if I remember correctly, after a 3-year time skip.

I really liked all these series at the beginning and the characters (especially the good boys: Mhok, Kaitoon and Pluem). Their breakup, the reasons for the breakup, how those who broke up behaved towards their supposedly loved ones made that reconciliation feel sour and unearned. I didn't see in it any "cleansing", explanation of misunderstandings, maturity, drawing conclusions of what happened and learning from it, some fucking apologies (Mhok apologized! Mhok! still angry about it), recognizing that someone was treated badly. The breakups were stupid and unnecessary, just for the sake of separating the lovers, and the unfair treatment of the nicest, most devoted and most committed characters like Mhok, Kaitoon and Pluem left such an unpleasant feeling.

[saintverse]

forgive me on possible poor wording on this post (suggestions and discussion are welcome and open) i'm really not feeling well right now and i struggle with articulating myself because of brainfog.

tumblr is an echo chamber but if you say that you're accused of being a fascist or whatever when it's just plainly and simply true. it's genuinely wonderful to have an online space dominated by autistic people and leftists but the disadvantages of such a space rear their head quite quickly when you think about it for more than five seconds.

(there is NOTHING inherently wrong with the way autistic people think vs allistic people think, merely i think a lot of us struggle with the same issues that can sometimes inhibit our understanding of the world around us and experiences different from our own)

autism being the norm is fun and cool until you try to explain the nuances of like, for example, online behavior. because i think a lot of us struggle with black or white thinking that goes unquestioned and it can lead to really unhealthy habits. like yeah terfs are shitty people and we should reject their ideas, but spending your spare time sending random people on the internet gore is really weird, is giving them more attention than they deserve, and is overall a waste of time that can't be good for your mental health. and if you explained to anyone offline that one of your hobbies is sending gore or suicide baiting people on the internet, even with those people being bigots, they will be weirded out. it's not healthy to put that much emotional energy into your oppressor. it's just weird. go for a walk or something, girl. i can't watch this.

(creating public campaigns against specific terfs just gives them more of a platform and a weird victim complex. most importantly, you're putting your transfem friends and mutuals in danger by exposing them to this shit and giving transmisogynists a way to find them!)

(i don't say any of this to be shitty about autistic people i just think our brains are wired or whatever to make it really easy to fall down weird pipelines. hence why 4chan was filled with a lot of autistic white dudes. a lot of us are fairly susceptible to rhetoric if it goes unquestioned and aligns with our personal unchallenged world views.)

another example, if you say the r slur in real life everybody is just going to think you're saying the r slur. the average person (who also is chill with the r slur and probably uses it themselves) will be like haha yeah. and the average autistic or intellectually disabled person will be like oh good god i need to stay away from them. but for some reason people on here think they can reclaim the r slur by using it as a slur online (especially when they themselves are NOT intellectually disabled and have ZERO right to reclaim that term). you've all been infected by 4chan brain and you don't even see it because you've convinced yourself being a coldhearted edgy bully is cool and that being shitty to, for example, people with social anxiety is funny and aligns perfectly with your progressive persona (you reblog posts about social justice but you're a dick to everyone you've ever met and you have no friends because you're a negative person who is genuinely unpleasant to be around)

image credit goes to: @batmanreturnsnineteenninetytwo

and did you know that randomly deciding to make asexuals or polyamorous people (people who deviate from the norm) the butt of your jokes and calling them freaks and shit is actually progressive? everyone has just been slowly and slowly becoming more mask off disgusting and it's wild to me. on tumblr.com, you people are being shitty to anyone who deviates from the norm? i mean. who am i kidding. this website hates trans women and people from the global south more than anything so i haven't believed tumblr was a truly "forward-thinking" space since i was a naïve young teenager.

people who lose their shit about tankies. people who clutch their pearls about misandry and "transandrophobia"... people who accuse all palestinians of being scammers. people who send suicide bait and debate with bigots they should really be ignoring. people who make fun of people with a complicated relationship with sex or with social anxiety. you freaks are everywhere and you're all ridiculously reactionary, you just dress it up as progressivism and how to be cool on the internet or whatever. i'm SOOOOOOOO tired...

100% a line of thinking inspired by this very spot-on post, as well as the interaction that had in the comments with @deepseasmetro - thank you!

tumblr is a flimsy ego-boosting platform that's filled with bullies who hide behind their politics and relationship with oppression meanwhile they don't give a fuck about anyone who has less than them, who has it worse than them. it's all about the oppression olympics, looking cool, and punching down. obviously most of us with a head on our shoulders know this already but it truly never ceases to astound me tbh 😐

it's the same people posting inspiring poetry & textposts about kindness and love and small animals that are out here telling teenagers to kill themselves!

anyway. while you're here please donate to hamada and mohammed and heba and her father bakr ⭐️