#is it true stupidity tho if it works?
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Izuna's Secret Technique
Shinobi: Seems like you have two of the world's most powerful men wrapped around your finger. Madara's your brother, but how did you manage to tame the Senju's White Demon? Izuna: *Smirks* I suppose it's a combination of both intelligence and charisma. Using those two things you can persuade anybody.
~Later~
Tobirama: No Izuna: -lease please please please please please please please Tobirama: ... Izuna: *Breathes in* Tobirama: Okay fine.
#tobiizu#he's a little bit stupid your honour#look I hc Izuna as cunning and competent and sly#but you've gotta balance it out with a fair amount of sheer dumbheadedness#is it true stupidity tho if it works?#what Izuna learned growing up with Madara: be annoying and or adorable enough and you can get away with anything#somehow he has yet to be proven wrong#in my ideal world this somehow also is what lead to peace between the clans#He decided to be annoying and/or adorable at Tobirama#Which somehow causes Tobirama to go: 'well I can't NOT fuck him'
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I disagree with all of the takes about how elphaba was less into glinda than glinda was into elphaba, if only because imo of all the ways to make sense of wickeds bizzare politics "elphaba's just down that bad for glinda", is by far the easiest and simplest. imo.
#elphaba randomly deciding at the end what the animals *really* need to save them#is a radical centrist who's spent her political career as the wizards biggest cheerleader#is maybe the most insane part of wicked to me#actually the most insane part is that it actually works#those two woman are BOTH stupid about each other#and that's how u know it's true love :)#(in the book i do think glinda being wayyy more down is true tho srry book glinda)#wicked#gelphie
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yaz’s turn. to break, to talk, to be told you did it and you can rest now
or, a slow quiet self-indulgent meditation on self-destruction in which i bend english into shapes it isnt supposed to go, call the doctor a psychologically disturbed rhesus monkey, and let yaz be held enough to maybe start to make up for all the times she hasnt been
#i had a lot of fun with this and i think it shows. 50% dumb (affectionate) poetryprose 50% quickfire dialogue#100% incomprehensible#i did add a couple footnotes for the most fun words :)#hate to admit that what they say abt editing is true. does make your work better when you let it simmer for 2 months#who has the time for that tho#fixed my body language description problem#scrapped almost all dialogue tags which is smth i shouldve done ages ago#the religion stuff is undoubtedly shallow and immature but seeing as im young and stupid im gonna forgive myself for that inevitablity#and hope i said nothing so bad that anyone who reads it cant too#anyway i shouldve been asleep 2 hours ago. goodnight
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Going through this early Yatagarasu stuff and laughing at the antics to immediately falling into despair knowing how things work out for all these people.
#a shadow's rambles#“oh this is so cute........ oh yeah things do work out like that tho :)........ (´;ω;`)ウゥゥ”#I'm torturing myself#stupid classic tragedy#also the author confirming that The Horrors of the Second Part were planned from the start#in true tragedy fashion this was always going to End Like That
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guy trapped in a hell of his own creation: haha ive never done anything wrong in my entire life. and im always right:] anyway. why did my little brother move out:(
its so funny to me that at first glance tashi seems like hed be the most 'normal' out of all the clones but at least all the others are slowly healing n shit while hes just getting more and more insane each day and one day hell snap and explode and maim someone
#my art#my funky guys#HES SO FUCKING STUPID.#tashi im sorry ily but youre literally the dumbes fucking motherfucker ive ever seen. and a cringe loser. never change king<3#like. this guy realised he was a clone when he was a month old and decided to base his new personality entirely#on the idealised version of the original he made up in his head.#like he did this to himself!!! he chose to revolve his entire personality around being a 'perfect flawless mom friend'!!!!!!!#in his head hes like the most selfless & altruistic person to ever walk the earth but in reality hes a sad selfish mess who just wants to#be loved.#he started out as a pretty nice and level headed guy who wanted to help ppl but then it just spiraled when he made that his entire#personality bc of his inability to move on from a lie he really wanted to be true.#he percieves shiro as this perfect flawless leader figure and he wants DESPERATELY to imitate that. deep down its not enough for him to#simply coparent and share responsibility w the others. no no no he has to be The Leader and do everything himself!#this mindset results in him later on starting to dismiss and undervalue his familys work and commitment to keeping them all alive-#esp soup. like sHE WAS THERE W HIM FROM THE VERY BEGINNING THEY ARE EQUALS THEY ARE BOTH EQUALLY IMPORTRANT#AND HES SO FAR UP HIS ASS HE FORGOT. somewhere along the line he forgot. he missed the point. he spiraled too deep.#and he knows. he knows but hes so terrified of change and growth and admitting he CANT do this alone.#he wants to be a cool epic capable solo leader AND he craves family and connection soooo badly he cant live w/o his loved ones.#so yeah. hes an angry little pathetic freak<3 i love him#despite all that hes not a bad person. just a flawed guy thrown into a situation so stressful and traumatising that he clinged to the only#coping mechanism he had at the time and just sorta. ran with it.#dw he gets better tho! it takes a lot and his and sticks relationship is strained for a LONG time but he slowly gets better. good for him
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Everyone keeps making really angsty points about what kipperlilly’s motivation behind her worldview and eveyrthing could be and while I agree it’s possible to me she is so ‘entitled white woman’ coded to me…
#stupid snake talk#like..? do u understand what I mean#it’s mostly the ‘people in hardships only are better than me cause they get special help or have ways around the system’#she seems like the girl who hates scholarships that’s are given to low income families or like minority groups#‘well everyone should have an equal chance I don’t get why they get special treatment just because they’re less fortunate..’#‘if you work hard they have as much as a chance as everyone else..’ (NOT TRUE)#sorry for random kipperlily hating in defense I hate her lol#it’s not like I’m an adult or smth I can hate a teenager.. we the same grade I’ll fight her after school tf#u will not see me being the bigger person to some white little preppy shithead#sorry!! idc tho ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
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posting your artwork publically can be so rewarding and so motivating but most of the time it just results in psychological turmoil inflicted on yourself
#like oh my god girl help#im so sad and over my confidence to do with my art being paper thin and fragile but nothing changes no matter how much i like a piece#i hate the idea that artists only draw for interaction bc i definitely do not do that id have to be stupid to with the stuff i draw#but i also hate the idea that artists shouldn't want interaction on their work? like it's a very human emotion to want your work to be seen?#i just wish people liked my stuff more truly. im aware my style is specific and to a particular taste and ik that my work isn't the like#high flawless standard of most traditional art that gets posted. like ik that and like god i wish i had that skill level but i don't!!#i like what i do tho i just wish it felt like a lot of other people did idk maybe that's vain or something. I don't know!!#i wish i did digital art but i hate working digital lol#ppl don't believe me when i say that digital art is preferred over traditional online but i rlly believe it's true#and if your traditional art does well it's at the level of digital art flawlessness#im simultaneously like im too young to be crazy good like other people online but also im too old to be on the path to getting good. yk#i blame it on a small fandom sometimes but that's unfair bc art within small fandoms still does really well#idk i think im just a flop probably but also i think im insecure. schrodinger's online artist crisis#anyways sorry ignore this im just running my mouth don't pity reblog my shit or anything i don't want that#idk what i want but it's not that lmao#i think i want to be better at art and i want people to like my art. which i have like minimal control over.#being an artist is fun until the turmoil sets in
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There is literally no way to crop my drawing that isn't both an instant dox and also idk not allowed because of disclosure, BUT I am selling one of the first products I designed. 5 year job anniversary is today!
#totes bro#i recently went through my personal tag 'totes bro'#and i really am happy i made so many stupid personal posts over the years because 10 years later its fun to look back#wish i could show my products lol#sometimes its very surreal to know people buy things that i design. not that its like complex or anything#i was watching some videos about like idk art/industrial design idk from people who major in 'design'#i will be real i have no idea if i work in 'design' as a space tbqh because theyre talking about a lot of stuff that i dont encounter lol#well thats not completely true i do have 'pushback' prohibiting me i guess like sometimes people dont buy the thing i design#i don't think people who work in design have like hundreds of products they design it sounds like they work on teams for a dozen or somethi#not me tho i just draw up some stuff and go 'this is your only option'#recently i designed like a product line for a guy only to find out he completely lied about volumes#i also design a commodity product so nothing is like special i think this one is like a dozen lines#with my dolls i try to make scenes like the rooms that architects live in lol#they have such particular spaces which are the literal opposite of my life#where everything is cheap and sometimes disposable. nothing is meant to be looked at.#my house is kitch and filled with stuff
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#wait wait wait. both of shadows games like. have smn that doesnt exactly STICK in canon#shadow the hedgehog has multiple endings so u technically cant count most of the endings as canon. like killing eggman 💀#and shadow gen is canon but all of the powers he got arent usable outside of that hub world with black doom#which we find bc he tried to use it against sonic but it didnt work? and ofc that means after black doom is defeated and it all disappears#hes back to being regular shadow the hedgehog without the doom upgrades bc the current timeline where black doom is defeated is restored#and ig this isnt just shadow but 06 was big on showing off sonic shadow silver. and that just didnt stick at all.#also erased from the timeline 💀 why do they keep doing this LMAO#06 was just weird though💀 sth and sxsg was cool and sth does have a true ending#considering shadow says he defeated black doom once before. that ending sticks#also crazy for someone to go “all of shadows sxsg bosses are basically shadow” it sounds stupid but they kinda cooked#biolizard is made w the same purpose as shadow#metal overlord literally copied shadows dsta to become the “superior sonic” type shit#mephilis took shadows form after being released by shadow#am i missing someone.. anyway black doom is literally shadows bloodline so yk 🤷♀️ theyre all shadow ig!#44597#like im really simplifying it but it mostly has to do w copying shadow or aligning w what shadow is abt OR in mephi's case. going against i#they also made interesting pointd abt tbe stage choice and honestly. fair#i was wondering why theh didnt use any sth stages tho? like we even visit radical highway every distortion but like#if u wanted another city. actually maybe westopolis wouldnt work idk#uhhhh yeah maybe not.. idk! the lineup is good but i was just curious bc thats literally his game so 🤷♀️
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many philosophers are posers as fuck they're like ohhh what if. but don't even feel it themselves. unlike me. i feel and truly believe every asinine theory about the world i post on here. aahh. aaaah. aaaaaahhh i'm scared lol
#the humble delusion enjoyer waking another day to come up with another theory about how it all works to keep him alive#no two truths can exist at the same time btw :/ I've been told. so yeah you can't respect other religions otherwise ur not a true believer#luckily I'm not religious#I see religion as a cultural symptom of meaningless. but it may also be a narrative interpretation of a very real force we are all#perceiving simultaneously. which would explain why soo many religions are so similar despite developing independently#either way I believe atheists to be quite stupid and annoying#ohhh I only believe what I can see with my own eyes. ok smart guy who gave u those eyes tho#how can u know they do not deceive you. dumbass. mf hoe
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I love to talk but I rly do feel like we have to be talking for a minimum of 8 hours straight before I feel like I can even begin to rly broach things on my mind or that have been bothering me a lot that I actually want to talk abt without being vague or deflecting or omitting or lying and if the conversation takes a break at any point it resets back to 0 and its still nice regardless but.
#we're all just desperately chasing each other around for a semblance of connection in this cold bleak world#but unfortunately due to the relentless crushing pressures of capitalism we also have to work so no time for that#man. sorry just frustrated n miserable now. wish i was capable of feeling close to other ppl wish i could give other ppl that connection#but instead we're just ships in the night passing by or whatever#and i have to settle with not rly being known or wanted or important in other ppls lives and its forever. btw#bc even if ppl do think they know me or do want me around or i am important to them in some way.. the specific torture labyrinth i call#home is constructed in the most elegant and precise way that im incapable of believing them to be sincere anyway#so thats all on me! if I tried harder and made more of an effort to communicate with or trust ppl i wouldnt feel this way!#but i dont so better luck in the next life i guess! this is why i dont think abt this shit bc it makes me want to kms#whats even the point man#dont even worry abt me im fine just need to fucking vent bc i dont have time to allow myself to feel anything bc i have plans tmr#so i need to go to bed early. and ill just try my best to keep distracted forever so ill never need to face how pathetically desperate#i am for any kind of emotional intimacy whatsoever and also physical contact but im not normal enough to fulfil any of my own needs#yeah well. its my life that i have to live and im the one making it this way. digging my grave and lying in it innit#its fine tho bc they make repressed fictional characters that i can project onto instead of confronting any of my issues#so ill just be here in my labyrinth doing that. while everyone else gets to see sunlight and grass and whatever#im just so tired i dont want to do this i want to pretend i dont care and dont need it and maybe itll become true. its too much for me#let me know when they need me to pilot the jaeger and drift with someone and thru our mindmelding i can finally achieve intimacy and trust#well anyway. that was embarrassing. hope it works out for everyone else#hope my flatmate gets her ideal life w our other old flatmates and finds a convenient way of discarding me from that like they want#except im going to make it as difficult as possible for as long as i can for them to get rid of me bc im selfish and want what i want so.#my obligate parasite ass. or whatever. im going to throw up if i keep thinking so thats a good place to stop and go to sleep probably#.vent#dont interact im being stupid as fuck and dont care just leave me alone thanks
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new peanuthead au 😭😭😭😭 cant stop putting these beasts into situations
extras + au deets below cut



essentially this au is where current petey and older petey switch bodies and they get up to various shenanigans . LOL . theres not That much of a plot and not much rlly changes perse . its just a silly situation .
current petey is after he starts living w dog man long enough such that they got a routine going . atp petey secretly likes how domestically hes been living and he has Not been handling that revelation well LMFAOOOO
older petey is married (probs about 10 years atp) + he basically just sent lil petey off to college before the switch and he was handling it poorly . LMFAO me when im in a struggling competition and my opponent is petey t cat
lil petey saved him and petey knows that Very Very well. caring for him became his new purpose and helped him turn his life sround so now that lil peteys off living his own life hes kinda lost and it freaks him out really badly . he misses his son so damn bad bru 😭😭😭😭 bro was not prepared for empty nester depsair
thats why he gets so emotional in the comic LOL . seeing lil petey as a little baby again is basically a dream come true for him . he misses baby lil petey so bad 😭😭😭😭
the switch happens bc (current) petey makes some new body switching invention boogaloo and he thinks that it didnt work and calls it a day but it Did work it just took effect overnight instead of immediately like he had expected . also the body switching invention was across universes instead of within a single world like he had intended. LMFAO His stupid baka life 😭😭😭
older dog man is retired at this point. hes also kinda mellowed out bc hes older . older dogs are chiller and that applies to dog man too LMFAO . he doesnt have the stamina to be that high energy anymore
older dog man can recognize the switch almost Instantly bc peteys demeanor is waaaaayyy too different and too similar to how he used to act 15 years ago .
older dog man tries 2 be understanding and give petey space bc he knows that hes not his petey anymore but he gets separation enxiety really bad and he misses his petey Really Really bad. especially bc atp lil peteys not living w them anymore so he js feels Really lonely. my goat 😭😭😭😭
older petey is having the time of his life. his baby is a baby again and his body is light and he doesnt have back pain anymore and he doesnt need glasses to see . however he Knows his dog man gets separation anxiety and needs his daily quota of physical touch (never underestimate a mf whose love language is ohysical touch) and he knows that the past him would Not give him that . so he Is having a good time but hes also constantly worrying about how his dog man is doing .
current petey meets older lil petey at some point and he feels a crushing sense of despair about it 😭😭😭 in my mind dog man comforts him and tells him his petey also didnt handle lil petey growing up very well .
eventually the two peteys sync up the body switching thingy and go back to their og worlds . i assume when they switch back older peteys reached peace abt his empty nest despair probs thanks to lil petey . and current petey has a bit of a different perspective on both dog man And lil petey . smth smth valuing the time he has w them Now. yah. #corny but thats how i like it YAYYYYYY
lil petey can immediately tell that older petey isnt His papa . he can do that in canon so he can do it here too lol . id assume it kinda confuses him tho bc he can tell its petey but hes too different to be PETEY ygwim
ok thats it i think
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Do they purr - genshin non-humans
៚ Zhongli ✧ Xiao ✧ Wanderer ✧ Albedo ✧ Venti
Notes: Holy hell how do I have 50 followers??? THANK YOU EVERYONE FOR SUPPORTING MY SILLY MUSINGS. This literally was just my way to learn how to write smut and post self-indulgent head canons but I’m glad people are enjoying this with me :DDDD
𝐙𝐇𝐎𝐍𝐆𝐋𝐈 ᥫ᭡
Yes, 100%. He will deny it every time but lay on this man’s chest, maybe press a kiss to his jaw, and his chest is going like a fucking engine. He will insist that it’s not a purr, it’s simply a content growl— or perhaps a rumble, at most. He isn’t some measly cat, after all, he is a mighty dragon, the Prime Adeptus—
It’s definitely a purr.
Get him a cat ear hairband. He will give you the most long-suffering, unamused look while he wears them, but he will wear them. Anything for his beloved ♡~
𝐗𝐈𝐀𝐎 ᥫ᭡
No, unfortunately. You have found no evidence that your stone-faced Yaksha is capable of emitting a purr, or purr-like sound (though certainly not for lacking of trying).
However… there is the matter of whether he is able to trill or coo like a bird, given that is his true nature.
He gets annoyed when you ask him, adamant that is not something he can do, and how dare you even entertain such a notion. Have you no respect for the adepti? Hmph.
…but you swear you’ve heard him chirp when you catch him off guard: kissing him without warning or praising him unabashedly.
It seems this will require further investigation.
𝐒𝐂𝐀𝐑𝐀 ᥫ᭡
Not purring, but whirring!! Got this idea from @seabirdtxt ‘s Glitch in Irminsul fic (it’s SAGAU focused on the diff vers of scara existing at the same time, go read it it’s great) and it just makes so much sense to me.
As a mechanical puppet, and an advanced one at that, Scara has tons of machinery going on inside of him. Though it usually can’t be heard, if you get especially close to his chest— a privilege only reserved for you and maybe Nahida during hugs —you can hear the whirring and clicking of his moving parts inside. It doesn’t sound the same as a purr, not exactly, but it’s pretty damn close.
Most of the time it’s pretty faint, but sometimes Scara might just make it louder— it’s got nothing to do with the way your face lights up or how you smile when you hear it, don’t be stupid.
Of course, the only way he can make the noise louder is by overworking his system, making the parts inside move faster than they’re supposed to. If he does it too much or for too long, well…
You’ll know it’s time to lecture him on taking better care of himself when he starts burning up. Overheating is the first sign he’s about to overload his system and shut down (or from everyone else’s perspective: pass out).
You’re the only one who can make him stupid enough to be willing to break his own mechanisms just to see that adorable ridiculous expression on your face. (He might come back to his senses in a petulant huff if you start calling him a cat, tho)
𝐀𝐋𝐁𝐄𝐃𝐎 ᥫ᭡
Sadly, purring is not a feature homunculi come with. But this is Albedo we’re talking about, he can definitely figure it out.
He won’t tell you just what idea you’ve sparked with your question— you always worry when he starts self-experimenting —but it’ll be fine! He takes all the necessary precautions, limits any risk, because there’s always some risk in life, and downs a concoction or two in his quest to see if he can change the makeup of his own body. As an artificial life form, he’s less delicate than an organic one, so he doesn’t need to worry about pesky issues like rearranging his (non-existent) organs in a fatal manner.
And it works! Well, sort of. You come back home to a boyfriend that is fully capable of purring!! And also!! Has, uh, cat ears…
Albedo would consider it a success— he accomplished his goal, even if there were a few side effects. And you get a pretty catboy equipped with the cute, twitching ears and a fuzzy blonde tail; everybody wins! ♡
Of course, there’s always the chance his experiment just turns him into a cat entirely… but it wears off after a day or so, so it’s not the worst thing Albedo’s done to himself.
Either way, congratulations, he can now purr for the next 24 hours. And regardless of his cat-to-boy ratio, he will be expecting pets. Get to it~
𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐈 ᥫ᭡
He has bird vocalisations! Except he’s worse at hiding it then Xiao may or may not be. It’s not outright chirping, but it is a cooing trill in the back of his throat, too vibrational to be a regular hum.
It’s the sound he makes when he’s perfectly content, laying in a warm patch of sun on the soft grass, sat atop a roof with alcohol warming his veins, and curled up in your arms, round cheek smushed against your chest. He takes in a deep breath, filling his lungs with your scent, and then releasing it in a sigh, accompanied by the musical tones of his little trill.
He makes shorter ones when he’s pleasantly surprised; when you unexpectedly toss him an apple or pat his head. He’ll grin or lean into the touch and make that sound in his throat. Too quiet to be heard by the people around you over the din of the town, but you’ll hear it. It’s a sound just for you ♡
#salemwritesathing#genshin hcs#genshin x reader#zhongli x reader#wanderer x reader#scara x reader#scaramouche x reader#xiao x reader#albedo x reader#venti x reader#genshin fic
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Hi! I hope you’re doing well and have a nice day, you deserve it with all the amazing stories you have written. I love the way you write villain characters so much. Can I request a story between a villain x sidekick/ someone who works on their side? Your wrote the conflict feelings when the hero falls for the villain so well, I’m curious to see how you explore a relationship where the villain falls for someone who he doesn’t have to hide/ compromise his ideas for? No pressure tho!
"Have you considered," the villain said, "chasing after someone who isn't your boss?"
"Is that a request or order for me to stop?"
The villain considered their sidekick for a moment, at that. They were a bright young thing, as sidekicks so often were. Beautiful and powerful and eager to sink their teeth in the world and leave all the bloody marks of a legacy. Passion-sparkling. Not yet tired. Their fury still a forest fire.
The villain should have said yes. Stop. It was the only smart thing. The only reasonable thing. Bright young things should be with other bright young things, and if they were chasing something else it was probably a trap.
At their silence, their sidekick smiled. Quick and pleased and more confident than the villain ever remembered being at that age. They took a step closer in the villain's study, stepping in between the villain's legs, looming.
"I think you like being chased, boss," their sidekick said.
The villain raised an eyebrow, glad their face betrayed nothing of their pounding heart. "I think I like escaping heroes and leaving them looking stupid."
"Deflection."
"Truth."
"Truth can be a deflection. You taught me that."
Despite themselves, the villain's lips twitched in a smile. "Did I."
"Do you want a truth?"
"I think you're better at lying."
"True," the sidekick said shamelessly. "I think you're the most gorgeous thing I've ever seen."
The villain swallowed. They willed their face not to flush. By the way their sidekick's eyes lit up, they suspected they failed. Their sidekick leaned in, they pressed the advantage, just as the villain had bloody taught them. Their hands settled on the arms of the villain's chair, as if the villain was someone who could be bracketed in and caged.
"I think," the sidekick said, "that you go for what you want. So it's curious that you deny yourself me. Normally I'd be flattered to be an exception, but in this case..."
"You think I want you?"
"I have eyes. Tell me you don't. Make it convincing."
"Now who's giving who orders?"
The sidekick's smile turned to a grin. Feral. The villain wanted to bite it, kiss it, claim it. It was delightful. They wet their lips and there was a giddy thrill to the way the sidekick's eyes followed the movement.
Of course, the sidekick, and most of the world, always followed the villain's every movement. Just in case.
"Obviously," the villain said, "I want you. That doesn't make kissing my mentee, my employee, a good idea. I have - power over you."
"Oh, do you? Does a person like you have power? Gosh. I hadn't noticed."
"Brat."
"Boss." The sidekick's hands inched closer, dragging tantalising up the villain's thighs.
The villain should have shoved them away, but once again they held damningly still. Once again, the sidekick rewarded them with that smile.
"I don't want to take advantage of you," the villain said.
"I would love for you to take advantage of me, so is it really taking advantage? I'm not a child. I know my own mind. You're the one taught me I should go after what you want."
"Did I."
"Uhuh." The sidekick pouted at them, eyes glinting with mischief. "No takesie-backsies just because you never imagined I'd want you."
The villain's breath hitched.
Why do you want me was an absurd question to ask? The villain knew all the reasons that people chased them. Power, connection, the things the villain could give. To stop them, to own them, to ruin them.
Their sidekick's eyes spoke nothing of those things. Their mouth, when it finally descended on the villain's, promised only sweetness. Only desire. Only things that the villain had never thought they'd be able to have again, because it was lonely at the top for a reason.
"I considered chasing after someone else, sure," the sidekick whispered, "but you're the one I want. So let's not make a good thing more complicated then it has to be, yeah?"
It was a bad idea. A terrible idea. A reckless idea, of the sort that the villain hadn't allowed themselves to indulge in a long time.
And, yet, the villain grabbed a fistful for the sidekick's hair and reeled them in to kiss them. Again, and again, and again.
Their sidekick was right, after all.
The villain always got what they wanted in the end.
#villain x sidekick#sidekick x villain#writing#story#story snippet#writing snippet#original writing#writeblr#villains
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✮🃜🃚🃖🃁🂭🂺✮
striking a deal (sevika x reader)
contains: sevika being a jackass (what's new tho I still love her), gambling, reader sort of being a hater against gambling due to the negative impacts its had on their friend, enemies-with-a-bit-of-desire sort of vibe going on, reader is called a "girlfriend," very sfw, not much explicit romance and just a bit of flirting + attraction
a/n: hiii pookies so this is my first fic for miss sevika!! I hope it's accurate to her character and you all enjoy <33 would love to hear what y'all think hehe
art: four gentlemen of high rank playing primero
✮🃜🃚🃖🃁🂭🂺✮
"hey, do you know where I can find sevika?" you tentatively ask the bartender. he's some nervous looking kid who's probably going to quit after two weeks of witnessing the shit show that is the last drop since vander was killed.
not that you can blame him. you rarely frequent this part of the undercity, avoiding it for both the sake of safety and your own sense of sanity. you couldn't stand half the crap that went down here -- all the drunken fights, the sloshing of alcohol spilling and soaking through nearly every visitor's clothes, the lewd public displays that sent your face burning and ducking down -- and, of course, the gambling.
the damn gambling you had been imploring your friend, zafar, to put aside for almost half a year now. ever since he had lost his younger sister to an "intervention" enforcers had made at a party a year ago, every bad habit of his that had once been a small spring in the ground, roots shallow, had blossomed into a rotten, ugly plant that had spread faster than the blink of an eye could capture. you tried to be there for him, you did, but you also had your own family to take care of, and with his new friends being nothing but a bunch of enablers, he had now landed himself into a world of debt.
why, you ask? he had made the stupid decision to play with one of silco's little henchmen, sevika, whose reputation at cards is so notorious that even you've heard of it from your dinky little corner, far away from this place. you had heard rumours of her, some admiring, others downright terrifying. her help in smuggling shimmer, the ass-whooping she did for silco, how she was a constant presence when it came to the drug lord. that was enough to drain you of any admiration you could've beheld for such a strong woman. you had seen what shimmer did, the power it had in crumbling people's bodies, mental states, and their ability to keep living. you don't approve of anyone who's involved in the horrors of it.
the only reason you're here now is because zafar came to you sobbing this morning, grief heavy in his eyes over the money he had lost. he claimed sevika cheated it out of him, and while you still aren't sure as to how true that is, you'd at least try to set the record straight with her. you want to do something, anything, for standing around and watching zafar self-destruct no longer feels like a valid option. you promised him you'd try to see if you could convince her to return his money, under the condition of him avoiding gambling as best as he could and beginning to work part-time at the shop where you worked so he could have a more reliable source of income.
you can only hope this shitty plan will be in your favour. already, your stomach is tightening with anxiety, the knot circling and circling to bulge against your gut and make you slightly nauseated. but, you try to, at least physically, keep your cool, schooling your features to be calm, levelled and devoid of any jitters or twitches.
the bartender cocks his head to a dark corner near the jukebox. "right there. why, you've got business with her?"
a spring of irritation flickers through you at his prodding. the less he knows, the better. "in a way." you nod your thanks, then make your way to her.
you had seen flashes of sevika before. rallies, protests, gang fights. a blur of dark hair, a murky red cape and swinging fists. that's all she ever was to you. so, now, to behold her in her full state, feels... intimidating, to say the least. she carries herself as though the rickety wooden boards and worn out hinges of this place are her prized palace and she's the hailing king, rightfully seated on her throne. her dark lips are twisted into a leering smirk, haughtily bringing her cigar to them and taking a prideful puff from it. you swallow hard. you're definitely out of your league.
you linger nearby, watching through the crowd and awaiting an opportunity to approach her. when the men around her slam their palms down on the shared table, groaning and shutting their eyes in clear loss, her arm tossing towards them cockily, you stiffen up. you have an opening.
as the losers begin to file away, shoulders slumped in defeat, you can't help but feel a twinge of pity for them. everyone in this city struggles, one way or another. to have those struggles tied off with a loss in poker is a downright cursed fate. you try not to meet their eyes, sliding through the sweaty bodies until you reach her table.
you pause in front of her, hands twiddling as she collects the coins. you wait for her to look up, and when a few seconds pass and no such thing happens, you clear your throat.
eyes still casted onto the table, she speaks. her voice is like sand that's fallen through the surface of the ocean, rough and textured, impossibly deep and smooth. "you waited your turn long enough. what do you want?"
you flinch. "waited my turn?"
she tilts her head in the direction you came from. "you were lurking there. just watching, or is there something you need?"
jesus, and here you had thought you were at least a bit subtle. "oh, I--"
"didn't think I'd notice you?" she scoffs, scooping up the coins and pouring them into a small sack. "you almost fell head-first when bunny-face bumped into you."
your eye nearly twitches. "okay, well, good observation, I guess." honestly, it's impressive. you had expected her to be all brawn, no brain. "I'm here to talk to you about something."
her eyes finally meet yours. they're nearly silver, a dark grey that flashes under the colourful lights. her gaze is piercing, punctuated all the more by her dark eyebrows that are drawn in curiosity. "make it quick."
that's all you need. "okay, well, my friend, zafar, gambled with you last night."
"okay."
"well, you won, and took a bunch of his money." you wobble on your feet, hesitation seizing at you due to the accusation you're about to lay out. she could probably snap your neck in less than a millisecond. you've heard of her ability to totally crush any enemy designated to her by silco. definitely not a person whose bad side you want to get on. hopefully, nothing of the sort will happen if you express yourself in enough of a civilized way. "he, I don't know if it's true, but he says you cheated." you avert your eyes, the hand in your pocket gripping tightly onto the handle of your dagger. you haven't had to use it, not yet, at least, but in the undercity, it's better to be safe than sorry. and, frankly, you're expecting the worse from her.
which is why you nearly flinch when the corner of her lip twists up, and she says, "a common scapegoat for losers."
protectiveness immediately kicks in, searing through your body and urging you through your fear. you know it's hypocritical, considering you, too, don't fully believe him. but, still, you at least know his character, whereas she's just riding off her assumptions. "he could just as well be telling the truth."
"oh, yeah? is that why he sent his little girlfriend to save his ass?"
gross. the insinuation feels nearly as offensive as her insults towards him. "I'm not his girlfriend. and I volunteered to come here myself."
her eyes flicker up to you, and you rear back when they linger on your face, skimming over your features before settling back down to the table. "and while that's nice, and well, pretty stupid of you, I didn't do any cheating. anything he lost was because he couldn't play his hand well."
you grit your teeth together. "I'm not stupid. I just came here for a friend."
"a friend who clearly is a sloppy poker player and likely to lose to anyone who has the playing ability of a child." she snickers, and you catch sight of the split between her two front teeth, a little gap protruding. you force yourself to meet her eyes. the last thing you'd want is for her to catch you staring at her mouth.
what's worse is that you can't even argue back with her on this. for all you know, zafar very well may be a shit player. probably is, in all honesty. it wouldn't surprise you -- he always was impulsive as hell, and you wouldn't bat an eye to discover that challenging sevika had been an in-the-moment decision of his. but, you know what he's been through. you know how down in the dumps he is financially, and just how desperate he's gotten. his mourning has only made it worse.
"okay, well," you trail off, not really knowing where to continue. you didn't really lay a plan for yourself, and now that she's swiftly shut you down in a manner which you have no rebuttals for, you're not sure how to proceed.
"was that all?"
"no." you force your shoulders to straighten, hoping you sound somewhat firm, maybe even dignified. "is there any way you can return his money? he's been through a lot this year, and--"
she cuts you off with a bark of laughter, the raspy noise of it harsh and grating to your ears. the anger it's stirring in you probably isn't helping either. "okay. listen, friend of...?"
deadpan, you respond, "zafar."
she nods. "yeah, whatever his name is. this game comes with risks, and one of them is losing all your shit if you play with no tact."
you suck in a sharp breath at the condescension in her tone. "I'm well aware of that. but, listen, he's had a hard time of it lately, and--"
"and what? we've all had a hard time of it lately. if he chose to put his life's worth on the table, that isn't my problem."
"I'm not saying it is, but c'mon, can't you have a little empathy now and return his money?" you stick an incredulous finger at the table. "you have enough as is! no need to drain every zaunite of their hard-earned money before you're satisfied."
her eyes flutter in what seems to be exasperation, but you firmly planted, both on your feet and in your stance. physically, you can't do shit against this mass of muscle. but, maybe, just maybe, you can verbally get somewhere.
she stares up at you, elbows propped on her knees. "if it's so hard-earned, why did your friend gamble it away? are you asking me to return someone's money because they were an idiot?"
frustration begins to gnaw at your stomach, a burning sensation swarming through your insides and making you tense up. "I'm telling you, he's not in his right mind right now. things have happened in his family lately, and it's been hard for him."
"are you forgetting where you live? things happen in every family here. being smart is how you survive. if your friend can't do that..." she shrugs, continuing to sweep the coins into the opening of the sack. "then, that's not my problem."
"being a decent person helps in surviving in this place, too. being there for each other and our community. don't you care about that?"
her movements halt for a second, eyes flicking between you and the table. you nearly crack a grin and do a little rejoicing dance. bingo.
you add a sticky sweet tone to your voice, pleading and coaxing. you've heard she frequents babette's brothel, and if that's any indication about where her romantic interests lie, maybe you'll be able to woe her into complacency. "c'mon, I promise, he'll never gamble with you again, and if he does, take anything and keep it. but, please, just this one time, help him out, hm? do it for him, do it for your people."
her face, which was stoic only moments ago, shatters into a loud round of laughter, her palm smacking against her knee. "I gotta hand it to you, the 'for your people' thing was a nice touch." she stands up, and you try not to blink too hard at the sight of her towering over you. jesus, she's gigantic. no wonder people are scared shitless of her. no wonder you were scared shitless of her. "now, be honest. was the money yours? boyfriend left you and stole from the cookie jar? told you you had to come and get it back yourself?"
the more she talks, the more you get the sense that to her, this conversation is simply something to toy with, and just engage with as a playful little pastime. it only causes more anger to ooze within you, fiery and hot within your guts, like lava. this isn't a game. this is about people's lives, people's financial sustenance. she must earn a decent amount of time for her work for silco, and yet here she is, milking the people of zaun who don't know any better or who are too entrenched in their habits to put a stop to their gambling.
you want to make a jab at her that's as harsh as the blow to your ego was. it might risk you a limb, but you're praying the surprising amount of calm she's shown so far is a sign that your safety is secure. "you know what? I was stupid for coming here in the first place. to think one of silco's little servants would actually have a moral compass."
unfortunately, her irritatingly cool collection not only keeps your physical wellbeing in check, but does the complete opposite to your pride. for all she does is stare down at you, the long, blue scar seeping through her cheek curling as she chuckles, the noise husky and rough, like crushed velvet. "ouch. good one. anyone else might've gotten offended by that." her stormy eyes skip to your lips for a split second. "quite the mouth you have on you."
what the fuck is that supposed to mean? is that a pass or a genuine comment on your temper, which is very much flaring up? either way, you're determined to try harder to goad her. "yeah, well, I'm sure it has no impact on you, right? after all, you spend your days contributing to half the shit going down in this fucked up city."
her jaw suddenly clenches, mouth pressing together. you would've thought someone in this business would be a bit more discreet with the physical manifestations of their moods. but, sevika is like an open book, grey eyes wide, and eyebrows sunk down, her newfound disdain clear as day. "what the hell is that supposed to mean?"
"the shimmer," you answer, squinting at her, praying the expression conveys how stupid you think she is. "your little boss has just tossed it to this city and watches the damages of it unfold without doing shit. wasn't his glorious plan to make this city a better place, not fuck us over even more?"
"the shimmer is helping," she retorts, her voice harder than before, lined with a firm pressure that had been absent in her prior teasing and casual dismissal. "we have something that topside could only wish for, something that gives us an advantage."
"an advantage?" you laugh bitterly. the injustice of it all, the agony you see your people in everyday -- it all floods your insides, wracking you from within. "it's been years since it's come about, and nothing has changed. piltover is still on top, and in addition to that, they have hextech." you make sure your eyes pointedly lock onto hers, hoping she feels every single fibre of your rage. "just admit it. you guys haven't done shit."
"and what exactly are you doing?" her voice is lowered to a heavy whisper, and you feel the noises surrounding you two melt away into a light, background buzz. the iciness of her voice feels almost worst than any other stupid tone she's taken since you started interacting.
"something you and your boss don't seem to be helping at all with." you give her a tight-lipped smile, your gums aching with how hard your teeth press in together, the disjointed shapes of them uncomfortable and crooked as they mash at the edges. "trying to survive."
her nostrils flare, her burning glare pulsing through the barrier of your skin and making your insides turn from the onslaught of anxiety that enters. god, will she unleash some goons on you now or something?
"sevika!"
you jerk at the sudden sound, whereas sevika simply blinks down at you, gaze unrelenting. "what?" she calls out.
uncomfortable at having her eyes still pointed at you, you turn to the voice, seeing a man with small, rectangular glasses hanging off his nose looking awfully mopey.
"you promised us another round," the guy wails, tossing his hands in the air.
you swallow hard at the silence that ensues, still feeling her stormy eyes hooked onto you. after a moment, she says, "maybe later."
the man's shoulders sag as he heaves a dramatic sigh, turning to who seems to be his friend, whimpering, "she's too busy with her date."
you grimace at the mistake, though the disgust you feel at it is fused with an irritation directed at the way your stomach spins at the word 'date.' you're not stupid -- sevika is, objectively, pretty attractive. hot, some people might say. but, jesus, she's a bitch too. and working with silco, which makes for a very unappealing combination.
"come on," she drawls out. you turn back to her, the anger from before now replaced with a wide smirk, one sharp eyebrow lifted up inquisitively. "I can't be all that bad, can I?"
you roll your eyes. this conversation has strayed too much as is, and you're not about to let it tiptoe off into flirtatious territory. "are you going to give my friend back his money or not?"
"hm," she ponders, and lifting a hand to stroke her cheek. you can immediately catch a whiff of the falsehood in the gesture, and tap your foot, waiting for her to just solidify your assumption. "no, I won't. but, do give him my regards."
you grunt, shaking your head. despite your expectancy of it, you can't help but feel a stone of disappointment sink through the waters of your body, falling to the bottom with more impact than you'd like. you shouldn't expect anything of her, there's no reason for you to feel disappointment. your expectations shouldn't have gotten this high in the first place. "of course. have a good day."
as you whirl around to leave, she grabs your forearm, callouses brushing against your skin. "hey, I just turned down a poker game for you."
"uh, yeah, and as a reward, you get a departure from me that doesn't include a kick to the shin." you snatch your arm from her grasp, trying to direct your thoughts to her shitty words as a desperate attempt to ignore the warmth in your stomach. "you're welcome."
with her snarky laugh ringing in your ears, you practically dash to the door, wanting to get out as soon as possible.
it's awful, but at the opening, something in you whispers for you to look back once more. it's okay -- it's reasonable, right? you barely frequent this place, anyone would want to catch one last glance at such a notorious woman in your city, no matter how degenerate and callous she is.
the only con to this is as soon as you find sight of her through your tentative search of the crowd, she's already staring back at you. at being caught, you internally cringe, the feeling only intensified by a tenfold when she tips her head at you with a grin.
ugh. never again.
two weeks later, you find a crisp envelope laying out on the mat outside your front door. in neat, cursive writing, it reads:
A thank you gift for the free business consultation. Do with it what you will. Whether you or someone else needs it. - S
#also hehehe sevika called off the game when talking to read both: to continue talking to reader. and because she actually reflected on#some of what reader said when criticizing her#s.writing#sevika x reader#sevika x you#sevika#sevika arcane#arcane x reader#arcane x you
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Hi, could I please request jealous and possessive Chishiya? Thanks
Paring: Chishiya Shuntaro x fem!reader
Warnings: Aggressive guys, reader gets kinda uncomfy, mentions of showering together lols
A/n: Hope headcanons work, totally willing to expand this, tho just lmk ♡
The type to lowkey stalk you before dating
He wouldn't think of it as stalking tho. He would just want to know more about you
He would claim he doesn't get jealous, but he does
Arisu getting a little too friendly? Oh boy
He'll find a good moment to briefly pull him to the side
Arisu is innocent, he just gets a talk
It's possibly a scary one, but better than a random guy touching you up sometime
Don't they know you're his?
Well, they do now!
And he'll try to keep you out of the loop
Though you may question where he got split knuckles, he'll brush you off
He might get a little clingy after
At least, for Chishiya
"You know you're mine, right?" He'd say, not really asking
"Are you jealous?" You smiled
"That's not what I said."
You might decide to hang out at the pool for a little
but you know that never lasts long
After one too many people hugging you, or a few more guys talking to you than Chishiya would prefer, you'd feel two hands on your waist, and a swift exit would be made
He'd have a huge glaring issue
but he doesn't care, nor is it an issue to him
It scares off most problems people, though
He's the type to get silent revenge
He's not one for making a scene, usually, but if it's the easiest option, well...
You were sipping a nice tropical drink, sitting by the pool with your legs in the water, when a boy walks up to you, clearly checking you out as he sits beside you.
"Hey there." He smiles at you. He seems innocent enough, and he probably isn't aware that you're not up for grabs, but Chishiya isn't one for the benefit of the doubt. He knows how this will end, but he watches from the shade to grasp how much he could get away with.
"Hi!" You smile, waving back. The boy quickly breaks his soft exterior and rests his hand on your shoulder, smirking at you. It's almost funny if you weren't so uncomfortable.
"Wanna go catch some shade?" He stands up, pulling you with him a little aggressively. His serenade is cut short, though, as he feels a harsh sting shoot up his calf as he stumbles into the pool. A hand briefly covers your eyes from the splash, and you don't have to think twice when you're being pulled away by Chishiya, leaving a commotion behind you.
"A little aggressive, no?" You ask him. He simply shrugs in response.
He'd almost never get upset at you because you never flirt back with anybody but the man himself
Sometimes, though, he can mistranslate a situation and get upset
He usually gives you the silent treatment until he'll finally breaks, snapping something at you
"Do I not satisfy your expectations? Am I not enough for you?" He'd say angrily.
"Chi-Shi, you know that's not true. Stop it!" You'd plead.
"If you're so interested in other people, go on then." He doesn't mean it. He never does. He knows if you tried to leave, he would beg if he needed to. He truly can't live without you, but you'd never hear him say that.
Whenever he's jealous, you can tell.
He'll always deny it, but he's got a darker look in his eye, and he's probably a little clingier
Very touchy, in private more than public
He'll hold you in public if he wants to send a message, though.
When you're spending time with him (often) he probably will struggle to let you up
"I need to shower. Please let me get up." You'd smile, whining.
"Only if you let me join." You wanted to wipe that stupid smirk off his face as you struggled and eventually gave up with a sigh.
A/n: Hope this works, Anon! I was trying not to surpass the line between possessive and yandere, but I assumed it wasn't too big of a deal ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ also had some NSFW ideas for this too, so lmkkk
~🍡🍡
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#chishiya shuntaro#alice in borderland#shuntaro chishiya x reader#chishiya x reader#chishiya x you#aib#aib x reader#aib x you#alice in borderland x reader#chishiya#chishiya alice in borderland#mocchii writes
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