and now it's time to play that ancient game of mine -- moments in my fanfic scribblings that wound up kinda mirroring canon!!
(this is totally just for my own amusement. don't mind me!)
ofmd 204 & 205 spoilers!
this was my fix-it fic that i wrote in a deranged haze the day after 1.09 & 1.10 aired, and then never posted because there were a few small transition scenes in between all the meaty emotional stuff that i was just too lazy to ever finish up. upon rereading, i actually kinda like it and wish i'd finished it though!!! maybe i will one day, and just post it as a historical relic from march '22.
*****
(Ed and Stede meet at last!)
“What’ve you been up to?”
“You haven’t heard?”
“I’ve heard a bit. But I’d rather hear it from you.”
“Oh, you know. Plundering, pillaging, being the punishment this sorry world deserves. That sort of thing.”
“Very neat. And what’s with the–” Stede gestures awkwardly to his own chin.
Ed touches his kohl-painted face. “Wasn’t going to wait for it to grow back in before I got back out there. I’d wasted enough time.”
“Right, yes.” Stede lets out a wistful, slight laugh. “I was starting to get used to your bare face.”
“Really? That’s not what scared you away?”
“I wasn’t scared away.”
“Oh, so you just decided to abandon me for some other reason. That’s great. It feels great, knowing that. Life’s so much better now than it was ten seconds ago. Wait. Fuck.” Ed stands abruptly, shaking the table. “I swore I wasn’t going to do this. I’m fucking Blackbeard, I’m the kraken, I’m hell on waves, I eat babies for breakfast.”
“Oh, Edward.” Stede stares up at him, aghast. “Please tell me you haven’t had a breakfast baby.”
“Obviously I didn’t really,” Ed says impatiently. “It’s just an alliteration thing. It’s the vibes.”
Stede puts a hand to his heart and exhales. “Thank God.”
(okay, with this one i mostly just wanted the breakfast baby joke to finally see the light of day. but there's a slight overlap!)
*****
(Ed and Stede make up very quickly, and then try to make the crew feel cool about that!)
“Hey, Blackbeard.”
“Hey, Black Pete.”
“Oh, it’s just Pete now.”
“Cool, cool. I guess it’s just Ed now, too.”
“Welcome back, Ed. If I could just, uh, say one thing?”
“Sure, mate, what’s up?”
“VENGEANCE!!!” Pete screams, and pushes Ed overboard.
The crew bursts into cheers.
Stede can’t really fault them, all things considered.
“That was just a bit of vengeance for you, babe,” Pete tells Lucius.
“Thanks, babe.”
*****
Once a sopping-wet Ed’s been recovered, there’s the general consensus from all non-Stede crew members that he’s going in the brig.
“We’re really happy for you, Captain,” says Frenchie, “but he’s been a menace.”
“Obviously acting out of deep-rooted pain and some unprocessed childhood trauma,” says Lucius magnanimously. “But all the same, he’s been a massive bitch.”
“I think everyone should get a turn punching him in the face,” says Jim.
“Nobody’s punching anybody!” Stede says, in his clipped captain’s orders! tone. “But you’re right. I’m sorry, Ed; the people have spoken, and the brig it is.”
“No, I get it.” Ed holds up his hands in surrender. “Super fair. And hey, Jim, you can go ahead and punch me if you like.”
“They won’t punch you, they’ve just got hurt feelings–”
Stede is cut off by Jim punching Ed right in the stomach.
Wow. They really don’t waste any time.
“Sucker punch,” breathes Ed through what must be a dizzying amount of pain. “See, I was expecting the face, ‘cause you said the face–”
“Surprise,” says Jim.
****
and this is from a fic i actually posted! [x]
Stede decides to risk getting shot, and puts a hand on his arm. They stand still together. “I wish I’d gotten it right the first time. But this, right now, it’s the next best thing we’ve got. I’ll keep fighting if you want to fight, and I’m pretty sure my crew and I will win our ship back from you and your sorry lot within the week–”
“Pfft.”
“--but while we’re fighting, Ed, just know that I lo–”
But before he can say the words, Ed interrupts. “Nope. Don’t.”
“But I–”
“No.” Ed meets his eyes. “I mean it, mate.”
Stede listens. He lifts his hand from Ed’s arm. “That’s all right. You must know what I mean, if you don’t want me to say it that badly.”
“Of course I want you to say it,” Ed mutters. “That’s the problem.”
“Ah, right. Terrible.”
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come on there’s gotta be at least 3 sete/vale rivalry appreciators (you me and pedro acosta)!! haven’t seen 2003-05 seasons in full but mugello 2004 alone was so great.
vale and gibernau finished 1&2 on the same podium SEVEN times in 2003, the only ppl who did it more in a single year (since 2000, was too lazy to look back further) were lorenzo/pedrosa in 2012 when they swapped 1&2 places 9 times on the podium.
I love you anon
listen, I know some people need their rivalries to be more balanced than this, but in terms of actual on-track battles it's like. one of the very best this century. (I'm trying to hold back from calling it the best this century but I don't not believe that?) also some might argue that the 1-2 achievement is even more impressive in 2003 than in 2012, given more riders were capable of fighting for wins and the field spread was way less dramatic. sete's 2003 season in particular is so underrated, man's scoring an average of 17.3 points per race, four wins, 10/16 races on the podium, only two races where he was worse than fourth... serious pace plus consistency! out of nowhere!
anyway, here's every notable on-track encounter between sete and valentino, with * to **** asterisks by how worth watching it is for the fight between those two specifically. (for most of these, of course you can find more details in the sete post and the valentino race recs post.) using italics I've indicated which races are available on youtube (or on facebook, in the case of phillip island 2004):
welkom 2003**: the first race after kato's death, and the one where sete secures his unlikely emotional victory. valentino applied heavy pressure on sete in the late stages, but sete stood firm
le mans 2003***: yes, valentino was unlucky when the race was interrupted by rain - but the resulting battle between sete and valentino in the last few laps in tricky conditions is fantastic. multiple overtakes on the last lap and both riders off-track at the final corner
catalunya 2003*: valentino looked locked-on for the victory until he made two mistakes, the second of which has him go off-track and drop several places to hand capirossi the win. vale finds some crazy pace to catch up with biaggi and sete and pass them both
sachsenring 2003****: valentino gets a big enough lead you think it's surely over... but then sete catches him, leading valentino to let him go by so he can study him from behind. a dramatic final lap that prompts a bit of an existential crisis from valentino
brno 2003****: valentino shows up after the summer break with red hair, a determined smile and a mission. this race is a thriller, a proper dogfight between 3-5 riders with plenty of twists and turns - before the whole thing distils into an all timer of a final lap duel
rio 2003*: valentino sticks behind sete for a while, but it feels like he was just biding his time. once he gets past, he pushes hard and pulls away for a comfortable win
sepang 2003*: the match point race, after valentino had run away with the season post-brno. valentino gets a middling start and has to hunt down sete, but once he does he again pulls away
mugello 2004***: MY BELOVED. this is where the momentum in that season really shifts, courtesy of one hell of a chaotic race. there is an excellent sete/valentino duel in this race, but it's far from the only thing going on. all of it's brilliant
catalunya 2004****: a race long duel! I love catalunya duels because so much of it is about tyres getting chewed up and the riders wobbling and sliding more and more. sete's home race and psychologically a very important race... one hell of a show
assen 2004****: the turning point of the relationship! I still FULLY believe this set up everything that happened next, even if nobody talks about this race any more. the fight slaps!! the last lap slaps!! the podium with bad vibes slaps!! valentino in that presser!!
brno 2004*: sete badly needed a win here, and in the end it's not particularly close. the early battle with those two and biaggi is fun, but eventually sete's newly upgraded honda has the clear edge
phillip island 2004****: the first duel post-qatar curse - so these two now hate each other. it's also a match point race! banger of a start, sete is proper feisty here leaving valentino to hunt him down. banger of a final lap too
valencia 2004*: last race of the season - and even though the title's been sealed up, wouldn't it be nice to get a morale-boosting win to take into the new year? at sete's home race too? ah, you know how this goes. the way valentino gets past sete is pretty funny
jerez 2005****: well of course! again, fierce start, and it takes a bit to get rid of everyone else so it's just those two again. the last lap is something special, as is the post-race drama
catalunya 2005***: back on sete home turf!! and sete rides such a good race, he's really doing his very best - except of course valentino is hunting him down again. there's a brutally dismissive quality to this victory
le mans 2005***: edwards streaks off in front until valentino catches him - and vale's content to sit on his teammate's rear tyre until sete catches them both. the race from there is a joy
sachsenring 2005***: another goody! hayden features quite prominently in this one, and crucially valentino never manages to make a break for it. sete leads going into the final lap
brno 2005***: the fun of this one is in remembering it's sachsenring // summer break // brno... and the duel here immediately picks up again with valentino brusquely cutting past sete on the first lap. really makes it feel like sete is trapped in some sort of a hellish time loop... the end to this one is proper CRUEL
qatar 2005***: one year anniversary of that race and of course sete is desperate to repeat his success. the more of these you watch the crueller they get, not least when it really does look like he's built up enough of a lead. melandri also plays a big part in this one
mugello 2006**: you just know how badly sete would have loved to win this (and so did the commentators). entire race is excellent but sete mainly features in the starting dogfight, not the latter stages
phillip island 2006**: this is a chaos bike swap race and there's a lot going on, all of which is very relevant to the title fight. relevant to this post is that sete and valentino end up fighting for the last podium place on the very last lap. their last duel before sete's career was cut short by injury
obviously, if anyone's looking to watch the full sete/valentino story, there's a few more races you'd have to add in like 2004 welkom, qatar and sepang. anyway, this rivalry slaps. hopefully soon a fourth person can be recruited to the cause
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Tag Game/Get to know you better
Tagged by @merfilly
3 Ships:
N/A. I tend to prefer platonic fics, and when i do read other stuff I'm not loyal to any given ship over another. If anything I'm a crack-shipper.
Last song: currently listening to a one piece ost mix. I tend to cycle through soundtracks in general.
Last movie:
Howl's moving Castle, rewatch (comfort for the sick). I think Nimona might have been my last new movie, but it was a while ago.
Currently reading:
The Apothecary Diaries
Next reading:
The Apothecary Diaries
Currently watching:
The Apothecary Diaries
(haha. No, mostly I'm watching this season's anime simulcasts. Last season's didn't interest me much, but there's some good ones this time around)
Currently consuming: lunch was an hour or so ago. 2 Four and Twenty butter chicken pies.
Currently Craving: cake. Executive Function. Health and wellness.
I'll tag @tkwritesdumbassassins @mirrorthoughts and as a wish upon a prayer @midnightluck
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