#is for me it's more like this show feels empty of meaning like it exists only to be content for a popular ip instead of it being because the
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notachair · 1 day ago
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I think... this puts to word some of what I felt was kinda of with how handled things. Some anyway. I've been trying to articulate what feels... off. It's rough so bear with me trying to untangle more of it... and I'm so sorry but this is a wall... on your post... tell me if you want me to make my own and just link to this instead.
When it comes to Jayce's little speech there's this line, as an example...
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And what got me immediately here is... when have we really been shown that to be true, to "always" be true? I felt like this was an assumption put onto Viktor by the writers. Internalized ableism is a bitch, but I think they're doing a lot here with the implication of "always". Disabled folks all have our own journeys with it, but I don't think moments of falling prey to it- is something that should define his whole historic relationship to his disability. (Also one's allowed to vent about one's experiences with one's disability and the realities of how one's met with in the world, without it being taken as a diminishing of one's own worth.) And as you say, none of that really address the whys of the structural aspects affecting him both physically and mentally. Like (in regards to the internalized ableism) what is it that is constantly trying to make those shards of pain and inadequacy they'd put in him- to expand and consume, despite whatever fight he'd put up against it on either the internal or external front? And then there's also the difference between wanting to manage one's disability and... you know, hoping to cure one's *terminal* illness in fear of death's face.
I won't deny other disabled people feeling any comfort in those words. I do think there's something delicate and meaningful in having someone care for you and remind you of your worth when those shards, unwittingly or not, have spread and festered a wound in your self perception, because people keep saying it should be there and trying to create it if it's not. It's not that it can't be or isn't impactful, but... was that it? The big message? In combination with everything else, it felt more... preachy? And to a certain degree patronizing? The issue is that I felt *talked at* from someone's able-bodied* perspective. *Yes, even if Jayce no longer is non-disabled himself, that current commonality isn't emphasized, and even so- disabilities and disabled experiences aren't 1 = 1 (this applies to me too), never mind the *terminal* aspect, his leg's also an acquired disability.
Okay so what only ever Jayce apparently managed to have Viktor see, was essentially: "only you can show me that perfection perceived is not something worth seeking- an empty reward. There's beauty in imperfections", or something right? And his mode of attack was... that. Idk I am left unimpressed. I understand the point of putting value on perceived "imperfections", and that Viktor (could... actually... I had a whole section on internalized ableism I removed lol. But.)... that his disabilities could be and was perceived as "imperfections" within his new framework (btw, I saw him using the hexcore on his bad leg as a means to test out his chances for curing his terminal illness- 🤔 not really as a "I kinda just really wanted to cure my leg idk", and it would make for the most obvious results if it worked without messing with the vital organs of his torso, though he was only allowed to keep it for so long by that hexcore). But also, the philosophy he presents was more about than just his own disability or actual terminal illness (!!), it's about a flawed perspective on the general human condition, put to the extreme after Viktor became increasingly isolated (despite being surrounded by people mind and body, "we are one") and grew further detached, partly to the nature of his new existence* (*thoughts to be had here though, and also, whatever happened to the build up and clarification of to whatever degree the hexcore itself influenced him?).
Motive: on his desire to help others, emotionality.
A core part of Viktor's character is his desire to help and aid people, particularly those of the Undercity, and with Jayce it becomes about helping people through the science of hextech (a renewable and non-exhaustive energy source, I think there's a Point there) (tho I've gotta say... their presented products in S1Act2... can't say it's impossible for geniuses to be kinda dumb, it wasn't what I expected anyhow lmao). Act 3 Viktor, post-"imperfections of emotions and individual agency leads to pain and strife, as the other inextricably bound side of the coin = humanity's self-corrupting contradiction" conclusion, basically ended up out there trying to calculate himself to solving human suffering on an evolutionary level (truly Singed's apprentice that way), which was just eugenics in the end.
Even if that point of validation, of acceptance, is nice, especially when previously thought something forsaken to you... and despite what some would previously read/portray him within fandom- he DOES care about the interpersonal, like there's a reason he clings onto that goddamn tattered blanket 😭 And he continues to make a point of wanting Jayce by his side again in both act 2 and 3. But I still feel like it misses the "point" when the majority of the focus ends up on "you're doing this because of internalized ableism but I'm telling you that you matter actually, to me". I feel like it simplifies a lot to draw such conclusions of the matter, and make that the most effective point of "attack". I mean- seeing himself and what he was about to make the world into- kinda did after the mask broke a bit. But- other than Viktor's lines of "why do you persist? After everything I've done?", the "you were never broken" ends up defining this important built up scene. And I dislike this focus that completely overrides the structural issues involved, and basically works as a good-feel band-aid. I dislike the way Viktor's character motivation feels reduced to that point, with that "always" in particular, as well as the "only you" when that was the conviction made. Combating ableism 101.
Like I get he's attacking the personal projections that could drive the conviction, but he sorta kinda didn't hit all the marks there. Uh- not to say that I don't know he's just being sincere here as well, in expressing his care and love for Viktor. But I feel like it works as a deflection that shouldn't have been entirely effective on its own (yes the future-vision, but it's not emphasized in a way I'd like), story-wise anyway. I thought maybe they'd emphasize more on the emotional part, of his overall self-perception and of Viktor hurting (and not just in the "internalized ableism" way) despite however unaffected he might or might not seem (def not all gone). I can see Viktor in his state of upset and alienation of his body (and mind?)... see that hurt (grown from affection) as something, on a personal level, that holds or has held him back from actually follow up on those dreams of helping people (which become *that* in result). And with the access to the power that he has... conveniently think to attempt ridding himself of it, distancing himself, rather than process it. There's a certain... distancing happening just from that nature of having access to the experiences of so many people too, through that hivemind even if it's the most intimate thing as well and would stir a lot of emotion within him. And then there's him getting offed by Jayce in act 2 where he has his whole "two sides of the same coin" moment, and in the end, seeing "the glorious revolution" as a final calculated solution to strife (and- perhaps his own internal strife). There's something too to that "the line" sequence after being rejected in episode 8. But yea, there is a point here that could have been made in terms of valuing "imperfections" of the human condition, but it's... not really being made? "They're part of everything that makes you you, and everything that I admired about you" (paraphrasing), sure, but what about some emphasis on other things idk. He's more than that and all that, but I feel like they ironically made everything about his disabilities instead, and I'm dreading the state of readings and depictions🧍
(Btw on that note of "part of what makes you you", I did like that even the herald still had his braces and ect. fused to his body, and even glowing up in the astral plane. I liked that the ones that were "cured", was not left unmarked by the change. Of note- a lot of those people seemed to have had similar conditions to Viktor, in the sense that they affected the limbs. Pretty sure that one kid who led Jayce was the kid in a wheelchair beside Ekko in ep 7 when watching Heimerdinger's performance)
Also, I would... have liked... more of him taking a side with the Undercity though... and agency, non-agency, death, transformation…go rage some my guy 🔥
Motive: on Piltover / Zaun, the structural.
So on another point... a very important aspect here for Viktor IS that initial dream of theirs WITH the sociopolitical circumstances. Before all of the cult stuff, the main tension between Jayce and Viktor is the matter of the Undercity and how they're dealing with the hextech (I've kinda wanted to make a post about it). And similarly with catvi and the story otherwise, that element does not get as acknowledged, and it suffers for it. Their dynamic and history is not removed from its sociopolitical context. And there... is something to that shard of insecurity impacting him more than he'd thought. But what it comes back to- is the structural injustices he has been faced with both as disabled and a Zaunite/someone of the Undercity. Like his terminal illness was literally fucking because of the damn injustices Piltover inflicted upon them, majorly didn't care to fix and would punish people for protesting. And as I said, their common initial dream, was essentially about helping people through the science of hextech, like- people of the Undercity. Something which they failed to follow up on, and then Viktor was dying, accidentally involved Sky in his own risky business that resulted in her death and him getting suicidal, then- died from Jinx's attack- frankensteined in violation of his agency (!!!)- and then Viktor leaves Jayce *after seeing the hextech weapons plans* (double betrayal). And there really is something to Sky's significance here... But yea, Viktor leaves with a totem to those hopeful dreams, in order to try to help or aid people of the Undercity with the new abilities he had. Like he's not wrong for wanting to do that, I get why he'd just up and leave. His philosophy about things resulting into the idea of a "glorious evolution" to solve human strife and the details of those transformation do essentially just become eugenics in the end though (btw, whatever was their choices with "all those willing" to forceful turning...?).
I think there are ways they could have explored further nuances around all of this, but like with the other things, the journey was cut short and simplified. In a sense I'm glad he had more agency than people were speculating, but at the same time... And I think there is a Choice done in making Viktor's "glorious evolution" the bigger bad (together with Ambessa and whatever she was doing all of that for), AND that it served as a way to override majorly every other conflict by presenting a bigger bad for Zaun and Piltover to "unite against a common enemy" for. If they'd emphasized more on him being a reaction to those injustices, with a hexcore boost, to Piltover's structural injustices against the Undercity (which includes that social model of disability), then maybe it could work more. AND with it having a presence in the Viktor-Jayce confrontation/resolution. But it's more "both sides"-ing the issue, with its favour in Piltover's hands despite it all. And like- "I dreamt about giving magic to the people-" yes, but what was the reason why? I'll give him points for the "now" in "now I only want my partner back" anyhow. Idk, I don't see the disregard of the implicit "wanting to help people" part as a win. Though it's presented through the emphasis of "magic" which has been demonstrated as... sinister to a degree, but also... not? Potentially. But the magic was never THE issue.
Even on just the interpersonal level between the too (which it's not restricted to at all)- I, again, dislike this focus that completely overrides the structural issues, and works as a good-feel band-aid. It needs to extend further, and sure it does in a sense on the individual basis with his choice to stay with Viktor even when he gave him an out. But as an important message moment? It doesn't demonstrate enough to extend outside of it, because we don't see it applied in different contexts, like properly addressing his whys. And with Viktor's one line of "why do you persist? after everything I've done" "because I promised you"... it's not that what Viktor did and was about to do wasn't Fucked Up (and he was having a lot of guilt about accidentally having Sky killed, I can see him getting fixated on trying to "make up for" it somewhat after being brought back to life in his alienated body, and in a sense uh... overcompensating), but idk.. I wish there was something that extended Jayce's way too? That addressed those points of tension in their history? I am not a Jayce-hater, but I don't think he's an uncritical "hero" here. Viktor ends up having little voice at this level despite his speeches (we barely hear him talk after the mask fractured some). And the matter of his forceful transformation, is not really brought up other than potentially with "this chain of events, started with you" in that one council room confrontation. "I never asked for this!"- neither did he <3<3<3. Anyway.
THERE IS SO MUCH TO SAY. But I gotta round it up eventually, so I've cutting off all my other things that found its place on this reblog while I've had it in the drafts.
Agency, disability, biomechanics and transhumanism is a TOPIC though. A topic with many fine lines.
Thank you so much for incredible disability representation!! Huh? Uh, yeah, I guess it's okay that there's no acknowledgement of the social model of disability... Oh, our character's feelings about his body and the treatment he faced aren't really discussed in detail? I guess that's alright. 'You were never broken... there's beauty in imperfection... they made you who you are'? That could be appropriate given context, yeah! Oh, no? Not addressing his pain or the discrimination against him or the fact his disabling factors were preventable?
No acknowledgement of how the world should be made better and safer for people who actually have disabilities? Only a message of 'disabilities don't make you inherently broken' that feels aimed at abled folks? ...Okay.
Anyway... thank you for the incredible disability representation.
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pinkieroy · 3 months ago
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I watched two and a half episodes of the rings of power and just feel like there's something missing?? Like passion?? That show feels so plastic (?) like it looks good, and it was obviously expensive to make, but where is the love for storytelling, which I feel like is what makes me enjoy lotr in the first place, like idk I'm going to try to push through some more episodes but eh
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wereh0gz · 2 years ago
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Holy fuck
#ramblings#sonic prime spoilers#i just watched all of sonic prime that's out so far and just. holy fuck#i like how it's all over the place but like not at the same time#like there's a formula here. it's just a lot for me to keep track of#also. now i know shadow didn't just attack sonic for no reason#he had a reason and basically that reason was he thought sonic was gonna do something stupid#also now we know why they didn't show the last world with the fourth shard#because it's empty. it's fucking empty#idk what they're gonna do with it? tails said stuff about that being a blank slate where they can build a good future or whatever#but i don't think that's what's gonna happen#also. how are they gonna fix things?#when rusty rose saw black rose they had a weird reaction#so is bringing all the alternate versions of the characters together gonna fix everything?#hm#also also. i don't dislike how shadow's being written so far! surprisingly!#like yeah he's angry and fighting sonic but he has a reason for it#i mean. sonic kinda poofed his original world out of existance basically#i'd be pretty mad too if that happened#and the animations is consistently pretty good! there's only a few bits that i feel are kinda awkward and could use a little more polish#and the designs are pretty great#the voice acting is really good too. deven mack is killing it as sonic and shadow's voice is just. so good#can't wait to see what comes next#anyway i should probably do my school work. i have a bit to catch up on
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fanaroff · 5 months ago
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DP X DC Prompt: It’s In The Cave
There’s an animal in the cave. At least, that’s the closest approximation. It cannot be caught on the cameras and any noises made only translate into static. Dicks says it’s green. Tim says it’s black. Stephanie insists it’s white. But Damian knows it’s all three.
The others can’t see it as well as Damian can, for the moment. It’s not a cat, but cat-like. It’s not a snake, it’s snake-like. There’s big, shining green eyes with their color not dissimilar from the Lazarus Pits. Tufts of flowing white hair white a body black body that trails off into a tail and pointed ears that flatten and raise. It looks alien. It looks like an animal. It feels familiar. Damian keeps it.
When it first appears, it’s only noticed at first because a few things are moved around in its haste to find shelter. That, and the little spots of green that trail after its first entrance inside. The green spooks them all, at first, thinking it’s Lazarus water. There are similarities, but it’s not quite the same. After a time, the green fades to red. There’s no recognizable DNA from any creature in it. They settle on it being an “alien.”
It’s always watching, always peeking. Snacks left for it are eaten quickly and sometimes vanish into thin air right in front of them. The longer they go without attacking it or trying to root it out, the more it seems to become comfortable with them. (Not for Damian’s lack of trying anyways.)
Dick tells him to “pspspsps” at it like a cat once, softly patting at the ground. When no one is around, he tries it while crouched between the cave wall and a piece of machinery he saw a movement between. The little thing “pspspsps” right back. He even sees a tiny paw with tiny claws mimicking his motions from under the machine. Damian decides right then and there that this thing will be protected.
Eventually, it starts getting comfortable enough to start showing itself more and soon they’re having to scoot it off of the keyboards in the Batcave. It’ll drag itself about, climb, and sling itself around their shoulders and gnaw with little teeth and claws on their gloves. (They go through gloves much quicker once this starts.) even Batman melts when it starts purring.
Originally, they were worried it was injured but after the time it was there, hidden, it seems to have healed from whatever it was. (Or they get to fawn over the little injuries and fix them up best as they can.)
It will only take food from Damian’s hands though and he lords this over the others with immense pleasure. Often, it can be seen wrapped around one of his hands and forearms like a snake, wiggling away and batting at its own tail-tip. Its growls sound like little blips of static and gargled nails.
Damian names him Phavadi (Marathi meaning that could mean a pickle or a mess, let me know if this is incorrect, it’s not my language.)
They aren’t able to find out what Phavadi is, at first. The Green Lanterns don’t recognize it. Martian Manhunter has never seen it and states that he is unable to read its mind. Like there is nothing there to grasp. (This starts a round of the birds cooing at Phav, calling him brainless, no braincells between them big ‘ol eyes, no thoughts head empty.) Starfire doesn’t know what he is, but is absolutely enamored.
It starts floating. That’s surprising, but also not. They knew Phav has some powers, it could go invisible after all. Gravity has no hold and now it happily makes its nests on top of their heads. When Phav somehow floats his way into the manor, this starts a frantic chase through the mansion to catch it and Phav thinks it’s a game. Winking in and out of existence, waving its tail from a chandelier. When Dick makes it up there to grab it, Phav just plops to the ground scaring the shit out of everyone. Uninjured, thankfully. Phav scoots off into the kitchen and is caught by a heavily scolding Alfred.
Sufficiently cowed, Phav is returned to Damian and the little thing starts sleeping in his room.
They don’t know that this entire time Phav has been following them on their patrols. Staying out of sight but watching with glowing eyes to make sure they’re all safe. An in-grained confusing feeling.
It’s when there’s a big-bad that things come to a head. The entire Justice League is called in and eventually Justice League Dark. The Robins insist on helping as well, they need all hands on deck.
Mid battle, Damian is about to take a hit he can’t dodge.
This can go one of multiple ways—
Angsty: little baby man Phav takes the hit and gets pretty injured. Left limp and unmoving to the distress of everyone. Constantine, seeing this thing is like “Oh. Oh shit. That’s a baby eldritch. That is an INJURED baby eldritch we are so FUCKED.” Because he knows that with this happening, its momma is about to come soon. Phav’s form starts to destabilize, little body starting to goop into a puddle of green. Damian is distraught. All he’s left with is a light blue, cold, glowing orb the size of a marble.
Ghost King: Suddenly, tiny Phav isn’t so tiny anymore. He’s grown to the size of a two story house, hunched and hissing. Eyes wildly glowing, claws out and very large, teeth dripping green, tail long and curled around his bats and robins. Constantine, upon seeing this, shouts “YOU DIDN’T TELL ME YOU HAD A BLOODY FUCKING ELDRITCH??!”
Feel free to add more or use this!
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maskedbyghost · 2 months ago
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Heyyy, it's me again, but this time we're talking situationship!Simon—aka the biggest fuckboy you'll ever meet. Honestly, girl, I have no idea why you're still putting up with him!
you can’t even define what you two have, but one thing’s for sure—he knows how to use his dick, and you're both free to mess around with whoever you want. but of course, you had to fall for him, for that stupid smile he swore only you were special enough to see, for the gentle touch that lingered on your skin during those rare nights when he stayed longer than usual. you fell for the way he made you feel like you were the exception, even though deep down, you knew better.
you fell for how he made you feel like you were everything, even though he’d always leave just as quickly. he knew exactly how to keep you hooked—giving just enough to make you believe in him, but never enough to make it real. you wanted more, but every time he left, you remembered that his promises were as short-lived as his visits. still, you couldn’t stop going back, hoping that maybe this time, he’d actually mean it.
but he never did. you’d have fun for a few hours, but then he’d leave, acting like you didn’t exist around everyone else. he’d flirt with other girls right in front of you, not even bothering to hide it when he left with them, almost like he wanted you to see.
and every time, it hurt a little more, but you couldn’t bring yourself to end it. you told yourself you didn’t care, that it was just fun, but deep down, you wanted to be the one he stayed with. yet, no matter how much it hurt to watch him with someone else, the moment he came back, all that anger faded, and you let him in again, caught in the hope that maybe someday he’d truly see you as more than just a temporary fix.
one night, you tried to have a serious conversation with him, hoping that if you laid out your feelings, he might finally understand. but he dismissed your emotions with a shrug, listing reasons why he didn’t want a relationship: he was too focused on his career, he wasn’t ready for commitment, and he just didn’t want to deal with the complications. simon insisted that keeping things as they were was the best option for both of you.
afterward, as you lay together, a clear realization hit you. even though you were physically close, you couldn’t ignore the emptiness you felt. that night you made a silent promise to yourself: this would be the last time you let him in, and the last time you let yourself be trapped in this cycle.
and, being the dumb man he was, simon only came to realize what he had lost after you were gone. a few weeks after your last conversation, he saw you a few times out with other guys, laughing and flirting as if you were moving on. it hit him hard—a painful mix of jealousy and regret. he realized that he missed you, but at the same time, he knew he had no right to these feelings. not after treating you the way he did.  
he managed to keep his calm for a few more days, but the weight of his regret grew unbearable. finally, he snapped and called you into his office late one night, claiming he needed to discuss the upcoming mission with you.
as soon as you walked in, simon felt his heart tighten in his chest. seeing your face calm, confident, like you had already moved on, stirred something deeper than he expected. there was no trace of the vulnerability you used to show around him, no lingering affection. he realized, in that moment, just how much he had pushed you away. regret surged through him, sharper than he imagined, and he knew this conversation wouldn’t be easy.
after talking about unimportant stuff for a few minutes, simon took a deep breath, trying to steady his voice. “i know i messed up, and i’m sorry for how i treated you. i’ve been thinking a lot about what happened, and i realize now how much i regret it. i was wrong to push you away.”
you looked at him, your expression guarded. “it’s a little too late for apologies, simon, don't you think? you had plenty of chances to get it right, and now you’re just trying to fix things because you see me with someone else.”
he tried to reach out, his voice softening. “i know it’s not enough, but i want to make things right. i can’t stop thinking about what we had.”
you shook your head, stepping back. “you had your chance, and you threw it away. i’m not going to be your second choice or your backup plan.”
"y/n-"
"no, simon!" you sighed, closing your eyes briefly to gather your thoughts. when you spoke again, your voice was steady, "you know, some people never fade from memory. they leave a mark that lingers just beneath the surface, no matter how hard you try to move on. but to be honest, i’m not in the mood for any more humiliation or heartbreak. so, this is my final goodbye to you."
you could sense that he wanted to say something, but you couldn’t let him speak before you had your say. “go ahead and fill your life with new faces, as if i were nothing but a distant memory. enjoy your freedom and let others wear you out as they please. i’m done being part of that. keep moving forward, and if you ever try to reach out, know that i’ll let your calls go unanswered. for now, i’m celebrating the end of our chapter.”
even as he heard you declare the end, he couldn’t shake the feeling that he still wanted you in his life. he was stuck between guilt and the lingering hope that maybe he could still fix things. despite your rejection, part of him struggled to accept that he had truly lost you, and he felt powerless to change the situation or let you go.
simon’s face twisted with a mix of desperation and anger. “you think you can just walk away and erase everything we had? you think you can move on and leave me behind like I’m nothing?” he took a deep breath, trying to steady himself, but his voice was filled with raw intensity. “don’t fool yourself, i still want you, and i won’t just let you go. you’re mine, whether you like it or not. i know i’ve made mistakes, but i’m not done fighting for what we had. if you think you can find someone better, go ahead. but know this: i’ll keep groveling and doing whatever it takes until you take me back. i’m not going anywhere, and i’ll make sure you remember what we had.” he took a step back, his hands clenched into fists at his sides, and ran a hand through his disheveled hair.
you just smirked, turning on your heel to leave. as you reached the door, you glanced back over your shoulder with a cold, confident look. “i can’t wait to see you on your knees,” you said, your voice sharp. then, you walked out, leaving him alone with his mess.
game on.
(I WANT HIM TO GROVEL FOR MONTHSSSS)
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@daydreamerwoah
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babyleostuff · 7 months ago
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call me back
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fluff (+ a bit of angst) 𐙚 established relationship 𐙚 idol!hoshi x fem!reader 𐙚 wc: 1.6k
. . . fighting with you is never easy for hoshi. especially not when an ocean is separating you
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was fighting over the last piece of cake stupid and immature? yes. did it feel like hoshi’s whole world was about to collapse when he noticed you ate it? double yes. while your boyfriend wasn’t known for his great patience and non-existent anger issues, he never took his anger out on you, no matter how frustrated and annoyed he was.
well - until last week. 
hoshi came home tired and very, very hungry, nothing out of the ordinary, though you could clearly see he was a lot more agitated than usual, so you did what you always did when he came back exhausted like that - gave him space. you were just about to start your nighttime routine when you heard your name being yelled from the kitchen, and not in a happy “baby, my love, my darling, please come hereeee” kind of way. 
you didn’t even get a chance to take a breath as you entered the kitchen, coming face to face with soonyoung and his angry pout. “where the fuck is my cake?” he asked, and now, a week later, his words were still echoing through his head. 
it was never his intention to lash out at you like that. obviously. he was tired, and hungry, his muscles were aching, he felt like a bad boyfriend for spending so little time with you, and he forgot to buy a gift for his mom's birthday - not that it mattered, nothing could excuse him for being so mean to you. to make matters worse, instead of acting like a man and begging on his knees for your forgiveness, he chickened out and just left. 
“man, why don’t you just don’t call her and apologise?” woozi sighed, throwing his head back because it had to be the tenth time he had to listen to hoshi’s story of how he decided to act like the biggest dick over an overpriced piece of a strawberry cake. 
“i did but she’s not answering.” 
“no shit, i wouldn’t have answered either.” 
and that exactly was the biggest problem - it was hard enough to go through a fight while he was home, but now that he was overseas, a thousand kilometres away from you it was impossible. yes, he could send you flowers and shit, but it would only piss you off even more. there was no way for him to show you how truly fucking sorry he was. 
“i know you’re angry with me right now, but please,” hoshi took in a shaky inhale. he couldn’t remember the last time he felt so… sad. “please, just call me back,” that had to be the tenth voicemail he left you ever since he left home. 
you, on the other hand, weren’t doing much better. you felt like slapping the shit out of him that night in your apartment, and although you were able to control your sudden surge of violence, you didn’t hold back on cursing him out after he left. you even thought about burning his side of the closet but if you did that you’d lose all of your favourite hoodies and flannels, so you gave up on that too. 
after your short rage situation, you sat down at kitchen island, and stared at the empty plate where soonyoung’s cake was supposed to be. how were you supposed to know he’d act like that over a cake? obviously you wouldn’t have eaten it then. you figured your boyfriend must’ve had a really bad day at the rehearsals. the past couple of days were really harsh on him, and if you could you’d wrap him in bubble wrap, a couple of blankets, and cuddle the shit out of him for being so strong through all of this. 
all of those excuses for him and still - you couldn’t bring yourself to answer his calls and texts, no matter how much listening to his voicemails broke your heart. 
“so, um, i know we’re not talking but i’m just calling to tell you good morning. remember to eat, and um, have a great day, baby.” 
the boys were slowly losing their patience too (seungcheol asked mingaho if he could share some of his calming tea) because a grumpy hoshi was never a fun hoshi, plus - they hated seeing their best friend constantly beating himself over your fight. there was something lacking without their performance team leader’s spark. 
“should we just call her?” mingyu looked over at soonyoung, who was sitting by himself in the corner of the room. “he looks pathetic, moping around like that,” he snorted. 
seungcheol groaned, banging his head on jeonghan's shoulder. as they started to get older he started to feel less like a leader but more like a therapist (he really thought about resigning the day seungkwan came whining about a love triangle he got himself into). “they are adults, they should figure it out between themselves.” 
“oh come on, do we have to remind you what we had to do for you when you forgot about your girlfriend's birthday so she would forgive you?” mingyu snickered, and pulled out his phone. 
you didn’t know what to expect when you saw mingyu’s picture flash over your phone screen. it definitely had something to do with your boyfriend, that much you gathered, but you weren’t sure you wanted to hear what he had to say. your boyfriend’s words really hurt you, and no matter how much you wanted to forgive him, you weren’t sure you could do it yet. 
eventually, you clicked on the green button with a shaky finger. “yes?” you took a deep inhale and prepared yourself for whatever you were about to hear. 
“okay, so you know exactly why i’m calling. your boyfriend looks like a kicked puppy, he stopped saying horanghae, he’s dressed all in black and he looks like he drank an entire bottle of soju. i mean, don't worry, he didn't do it because he would be reeling now, but you get what i mean. whatever happened between the two of you, give us back our hoshi."
"well, that was very tactful," you heard coups' voice in the background.
“can you shut up for one second?” 
“no, in fact i can’t.” 
“okay, boys, i don’t want to interrupt whatever is going on, but i really need to know if he’s doing as bad as you're saying.” 
“bad” didn’t even come close to what hoshi was feeling. at this point he was so angry and frustrated at himself for acting like he acted, that seriously had to be one of his lowest points of his life achievements. now you were going to dump him, and he’d have to drown himself in soju, and grow a beard, and write a sad love song that he’d hear at the radio for the rest of his life, and-
there was no way you were calling him right now. and yet, “h-hello? babe?” 
“no, the fucking pope,” he’d have to add a cabin in the woods to his list of what he’d do after you’d break up with him. “kwoon soonyoung, you have to be one of the most insufferable, impatient and immature people i know. all this because of a piece of cake? do you hear how childish that sounds?"
loud and clear, honey. 
“that’s why i didn’t apologise in the first place. i immediately realised how fucking stupid i acted, and felt so ashamed of saying all of those awful things to you, and so i just left.” 
you sighed defeated. you kind of anticipated him saying that - your boyfriend had a habit of doing things before thinking them over, and as much as you understood him being exhausted and overworked, you still couldn’t forget how small he made you feel that night. 
“look, i really don’t want to fight, being away from you is hard enough, but…,” you ran a hand over your face. what were you supposed to do? you spent the last three nights on the couch because you couldn’t fall asleep in your shared bed, and there were so many times when you wanted to text him about the most unserious things that only he’d get, but you just couldn’t. “your words really hurt me.” 
“i know, shit, i know, and i’m so fucking sorry. whatever i’ll say it won’t be enough, i should’ve apologised right away. fuck, your boyfriend is such a loser,” you heard him laugh, but it was not the usual soonyoung laugh that made the flowers bloom, and sun shine. “i understand if you want to take a break.” 
“that’s the thing, i don’t want to take any breaks. i miss you so much. i miss talking to you every night, i miss our silly conversations, i miss getting my daily hoshi boyfriend pics. i’m sick of seeing your face on twitter and not over face time,” you pulled the sleeve of his sweater over your hand, like it would make you feel any closer to him. “let’s take it slow, maybe?”
you could swear you heard soonyoung exhale, “yes, yes, let’s do that. whatever you need, babe,” he said immediately. “my poor baby must’ve been so nervous.” 
“i love you, you know,” you whispered. there was no point in making things worse and pretending that you didn't miss him, and even though it would probably be a while before everything went back to normal, you didn't want him to doubt whether you still loved him as much as you did before.
“i love you too. very much,” he whispered back, finally sounding a bit happier. “and baby? thank you for calling me back.
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pinkthrone445 · 29 days ago
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-My wife-
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Pairing: Agatha Harkness x Reader
Gender:SMUT, hurt.
Warnings: Witchy SMUT! Strap on use, magic, insults. Spoilers from the series.
Summary: after loosing your wife, you beg the witch to take you to the road to find her.
An: Thank you @neverfindmegone for the icon babyyyy ❤️ I love it so much
-"Agnnes... Love... Wake up baby..."-a soft voice sounded on the ears of the woman, that voice was sweet, inviting, peaceful-"Please wake up Aggy" - The soft pet name made her smile in her dreams, soft hands caressed her arms-"I'm begging you, wake up, I need you..." - The voice distorted, making her frown on her peaceful dream-"YOU ARE FREAKING ME OUT, COME BACK! WAKE UP AGATHA!!" - a pair of hands grabbed her shoulders and shook her, a high pitch scream made her wake up, sitting straight on the bed, her heart beating like a drum. She looked around the room scared, everything was empty, quiet, dark. Her chest raised along with her scared breathing. She tried to remember the sweet face that pronounced those soft words in her dream, but she couldn't quite place it. She looked at herself and she was completely naked and confused, she felt like she where slepping for 3 years straight.
She remembered something about a case, founding a dead body... Then a girl slipping into her house and interrogating her, getting her arrested. Also another detective talking to her... Something about a morgue and she reliving all the stages that Wanda made the hex live through... Fuck! How long she had been trapped there?
She got up from bed and ran outside still naked, talking to her neighbors she found out that she had been trapped on that fake  reality inside the hex for 3 years and she didn't remember anything from it.
She went back to the house and tried to use her powers but nothing happened, her house was a normal home and the only thing she recognized there was her rabbit.
From the basement she heard noises inside the house, grabbing a spoon, she went to investigate. She pinpointed the surce of the noise from a closet, ready to strike, she open the door, only to find you there, a girl she didn't knew but that she remembered from the night before when she "arrested" you. You were on your knees tied up and with tape on your mouth, your eyes showed a little fear and something else behind them
-"Ah, so that arrest was less like an arrest and more like a kidnapping" - she said looking at you-"But if you are real and not an invention of my prisoned mind, that means..."-at that moment the door bursted open, a girl in black that you have seen at the house the night before, attacked Agatha using a knife and her powers, she was clearly winning, but Agatha was incredible persuasive with her words and she managed to convince Rio to wait for her to get her powers back so they could have a fair fight. The scene was brutal but sexy at the same time, full of passion and sexual tension that made you feel sick on your stomach.
When the lady in black went away, Agatha payed attention to you again
-"Oh right..."-she left you there and went to change muttering a few nonsenses and worries. You started jumping trying to follow her- "The house is yours random girl, make sure to tell the revenge seekers that I said hi"-she said without any intentions to untie you before leaving. With your tongue you manage to unstick the tape on your mouth
-"Take me to the road"-You yelled at her and she stoped on her tracks walking to where you were
-"Come again?" - she told you getting closer, taking the tape from your mouth
-"Take me to the witches road" - You repeated-"Please?" - You smiled at her
-"The witches road doesn't exists..."-she spoked with a anoying face
-"You are lying" - You knew she was
-"Am I?" - she played dumb
-"That's just what real witches say to keep the amateurs out"-she seemed surprised to hear that-"The road will give you what you desire most if you make it to the end... And I can. I will" - You said surely and she looked you up and down, but after a few seconds, she left you behind again
-"The road is no place for a teen" - she told you without looking at you
-"I'm in my latest 20!"-You screamed but she didn't seemed to care
-"I don't know where you heard from the road..." - she began to explain
-"Books, the balad, legends, lore, my wife..."-you tried to explain but she continued talking
-"But it will kill you" - she assured
-"It didn't kill you" - You replied
-"I'm exceptional" - she said arrogantly
-"That's my point... I know a lot about you and that's why I came here last night... To break that spell you where under..."-You confessed and she seemed impressed
-"Well, if you can break a spell made by the Scarlett witch, why do you need the road?" - she asked and you sat on her couch, jumping so much around made you tired
-"I don't seek power... I seek someone... The road promises that what you are missing, will wait you at its end... She is what I'm missing..."-You said honestly and she thought about it for a second, but then she stood and walked away
-"Nope, too risky, no time" - she left you behind again
-"This people that are seeking you are dangerous, do you think you can outrun them with no power at all?"-she turned around after hearing you. That seemed to convinced her, because she brought a par of scissors and told you that you were driving.
She explained that you needed a coven to get to the witches road and that you could find one practically close.
You ended up finding the first one on a pretty cheap store that could tell your future. After some very good tactics of Agatha, you found out that she truly was a witch and she ended up joining her coven, also she gave you the names of the next witches and you found them all, convincing them in different ways, mostly blackmailing them or making them feel shame, but at the end all of them appeared on the house ready to walk the road.
You had a near death experience but at the end you all finally found the road and used it to escape the Salem seven.
The road felt weird, the constant fog and the dark sky, felt like if someone was constantly following you or watching you and it made you act weird too. You decided to say close to the only person that you knew following Agatha every where, and that didn't went unnoticed by the others.
As soon as Sharon or Mrs Heart began to talk, everyone started bickering about each other, about being followed by creepy people, about what trials were about to happen and about how everyone was powerless
-"She is here and clearly she isn't even a witch" - One of the youngest members of the coven spoke pointing at Agatha's neighbor
-"You just need to be a witch to open the path, but no to walk the road..."-you murmured without stopping walking
-"Talking about no witches, who are you anyway?" - one of them asked, you weren't sure what they names were yet because you had only known them a few hours
-"I'm *blurred words*"-for you, what you just said was clear as water but they weren't able to hear you
-"My oh my, someone put a sigil on this girl" - Lilia, the older one said and you looked at her with confusion
-"A what?" - You asked confused and they all turned to look at Agatha.
-"Don't look at me, I didn't put that fancy glam on her, sigils are beneath me" - she said with a disgusting face
-"Is sigil a spell?" - You asked them
-"It's a redaction spell to hide something, in this case you from witch folk" - Now it made sense why when you told all your life to Agatha while you were on the car, there was no reaction at all from her part.  -"Looks like Agatha brought a little mystery with her, probably trying to get her all to herself" - The one with the punk vibe said and you suddenly felt threatened but Agatha covered your body with hers, protecting you from them
-"Look, we don't know why someone put that sigil on her, she could be something special or she could be a pest that a cranky witch tried to hide under a rock, we can crack her open later. The real value lies at the end of the road..."-she tried to get their attention away from you
-"What are you trying to find at the end of the road? "-one of them asked looking at you
-"My wife..."-you whispered
-"The road can't bring dead people back" - all of them said at the same time
-"She is not dead. She is just... Lost" - You confessed
-"Do you ever think to talk to the police about a missing person instead of risking your life here on the road?-the tallest spoke and you signed
-"Nobody believed me, her body was there, but someone else completely different was inside, she doesn't even recognizes me... I just want her back" - You talked looking at Agatha sideways and Lilia's noticed but she said nothing-"Wait, where is Mrs Heart?" - You asked at the same time a scream was heard, leaving you subject behind and running to find her.
When you found her, the road was almost swallowing her but you managed to help her and took her out to continue down the road.
When the first trial arrived, you found a gorgeous house but you couldn't shake the feeling that something was watching you. Everyone started to drink wine but you quickly refused
-"I can't drink, I... I was an alcoholic" - You lied, scared of them pushing you to drink
-"Who wasn't?" - Agatha jocked and walked away with her glass on her hand.
Soon you found out that they had been poisoned, but following the instructions of the potions witch, you could make the antidote, but it wasn't enough for your ex neighbor that sadly passed away.
Mrs Heart death didn't affected the purple witch, but you couldn't avoid feeling a deep pain on your chest, and rage because Agatha didn't even cared a little even though it was her fault that she got there.
The potions witch took you to a side after burring Mrs Heart to warn you about getting close to Agatha, but even though she was nice for doing that, you knew her a lot more than what they knew, even though she wasn't acting like the person you used to know.
As the time began to pass, you started to get a little mad at Agatha and her careless reaction to losses and pain. Also another thing that contributed more to your anger was the summon of Rio, when she appeared she started to hoard all the witch's attention. It made sense for them to feel attracted to each other, powerful witches, both had many years and they seem to have some kind of history together, but you couldn't avoid to wonder if Agatha really didn't remembered her past life at all. You didn't knew what would be worse, if she didn't remembered at all or if she remembered something and decided not to pay attention to it.
Your soul craved for her attention, for her touches, for her caresses, for just a love glance towards you, but you were getting none of that.
One particular night, after having a talk between you all around a fire, Agatha stood up and you thought it would be a good opportunity to talk to her alone, to see that even with that stupid sigil she could understand anything that you were trying to say. But the road was a tricky place and you got lost, and by the time you found her, Rio and her were about to kiss, thing you couldn't watch and decided to walk away with your clenching heart on your hands.
You were feeling so bad that you tried to stay alone for a bit to avoid crying in front of the others, but the loneliness didn't lasted long, because after a few minutes you heard something walking to were you were. You were supposed to be scared, but you didn't cared much about it at the moment.
After a few seconds Agatha sat beside you on the excluded part of the road, smiling like she always did
-"So... Why are you angry?" - she asked picking a little branch of the floor but you didn't answer to her or even look that way-"It's because you saw Río and I almost kissing?" - she asked and you looked at her surprised but still mad-"Yes, I saw you spying through the branches..." - she said in a mocking tone
-"And what?" - You asked trying to ignore the pain in your heart
-"Nothing, I just fund it funny... You know, you always get mad when I call you pet, but the moment that I turn my attention to someone else, you trow a tantrum like the little whiny pet you are" - she spoke with the same confidence that she always showed
-"I can't believe how disgusting you are" - You grumbled
-"You can't blame me, you are the one that got into my house looking for me. You always say that you are looking for your wife because you love her so much but I found it funny considering how obsessed you are with me. Pet" - she used that name again and your blood boiled, she was such a mean and awful person to you and all the people, that she deserved a punishment, she deserved to feel how painful it felt to be near her. You lifted your hand ready to slap her but she caught your hand mid air and pulled you closer, your face mare inches from hers-"See? You are not even trying to get away from me. You are obsessed with me and I bet that no matter how much you hate me, you can't stop thinking about me fucking you and making you mine" - she said in an arrogant and mocking way, pulling her lips out towards you. In your mind you kept repeating how she almost kissed Rio and how much you wished it were you, and before you could convince yourself how wrong this was, you connected your lips with hers. You always liked slow and full of emotions kisses, but with Agatha, that wasn't an option. Her lips were soft but her movements where rough, she sucked your lips, she bit them and when you opened your mouth, she easily slipped inside to declare dominance.
No matter how much you tried to convince yourself that this wasn't rigth and that you should stop, your body would react in the opposite way.
You wanted to run away, but your body keept releasing sinful low moans every time her teeth pulled your lip. You wanted to stop but your hands kept pulling at her coat trying to make her be close to you. You wanted for her to show you any little bit of affection before doing this but you could feel how ruined your panties were with how aroused you were thinking about she fucking you roughly.
Even though you were walking for a little while trying to get far away from the others, the road had a mind of its own and you knew you were close to the others no matter what you did and that in any moment they could walk where you were and find Agatha and you making out, but for some reason that only made it more exciting.
The witch lifted you from where you were sitting and placed you on her lap, making your legs fit around her waist. Even when she was powerless, her hands were still powerful. With incredible precision, in one pull, your entire blouse opened, leaving your breasts clenched by your bra in full view, your breathing was hectic and that only made the up and down of your chest just sexier. You could see how Agatha's mouth literally filled with saliva looking at you, she licked her lips and her hands squeezed your waist trying to control herself somehow. Her mouth opened and she started sucking your neck, biting it, marking you as her, your eyes closed and you let your head fall back just to give her more access.
Her nails scratched your torso, from the valley of your chest to the end of your abdomen where your pants made her stop, sending chills on your body. Her expert hand pulled your boobs out of your bra without having to unclasp it and started to squeeze them, making it a little painful but so good at the same time. Her mouth started to suck your other breast while murmuring something that you couldn't quite place, making a mess on your chest, letting her saliva drip down your body, making you feel sticky and more sinful that what you already were.
With great strength, she lifted you up a little from her lap and pulled your pants down, letting you only on your underwear. She seemed rushed but you didn't wanted her to stop so you didn't said nothing.
The air on the road made you have chills and your body shook with desire, thing that didn't went unseen from her and made her smile arrogantly again.
Still holding you up, with her other hand she opened her clothes and you were surprised to see a bulge on her panties
-"I still have a few tricks on my sleeve"-she moved her panties to one side and pulled out a big purple strapped dildo and you realized that while she sucked your boobs, she was conjuring a spell to get that toy. Still surprised and lost by that, she carefully touched your panties, she immediately could feel the pool that you had between your legs-"And you keep saying that you hate me?" - she asked and you rolled your eyes trying to not giving her the satisfaction even when she was right. She let you drop on her lap, making you feel preasure between your legs because of the big toy and a moan escaped your mouth, her hand quickly went to your throat grabbing it lightly-"Behave pet, don't roll your eyes or you will regret it" - she told you and you nodded, completely at her mercy. You thought about teasing her, but you were really neddy and you were scared that if you pushed her too much, she would leave you rigth there alone.
Her hand went from your neck to your jaw and she pulled you for another hungry kiss.
Your hips, with a mind of their own, started to move against the big toy that was between Agathas legs, making her groan this time too.
One of her fingers slipped inside your panties, between your pussy and the toy and began to expertly masagge your clit making you see stars. Her thumb manteined her pace on your clit but her longer finger found your entrance and began to tease it, testing how open you were and finding very little resistance when two of her fingers easily slipped inside your wet entrance, your body trembled in her arms, adjusting to the feeling. She made a few pumps inside you building that orgasm that you were so close to reach, but then she suddenly stoped, taking her hand out of your panties and sucking her fingers with the cockiest smile that you had ever seen and you whined for the lack of contact
-"You are fucking delicious, keep lying to yourself that you hate me, I've bet you had never been this wet for someone else" - she said and slipped her hand inside your panties again, moving them to the side so she could make the toy grind against your soaked pussy making it fully coated with your juices.
She easily lifted you a little and found your entrance again, slipping slowly inside you, grinning as the purple dildo desapeared inside you. It was surprising how big it was and how easy you were taking it inside.
As you completely sat on the purple dildo that now was inside you connecting you fully with her, you grabbed her face, making her look at you, looking for something deeper in her eyes than blind desire, for a few minutes you thought that her walls were coming down, but she shucked her head out of your grasp and hid her face in the crook of your neck close to your ear, slowly starting to move her hips
-"Will you be a good pet and make me hear your little whimpers that you were doing earlier and gets me this hard?" - she spoke in a deep voice, clearly aroused. You knew that toy inside you was part or of her spell, but apparently she made it possible for her to feel it too inside you.
You began to move your hips along with her following slowly every movement. You could clearly see the preasure of the big toy inside your lower on your stomach, making you moan lauder.
As the pace began to encrease, your movements became sloppier and you reached a point where you were completely riding her strap, with your boobs bouncing and your hands scratching her back hurting her but in a pleasure way.
Her arms find the depth of your waist and hold you, making your ridind easier.
While you climax was getting closer hers too, and you could swear that you could feel her pulsating inside you.
Her mouth went to kiss you again while you desperately ride her and in a few seconds you came, your pussy clenching so hard that it was difficult for her to keep moving any longer and she came with you too, with the toy inside you, feelings your every move, every clench.
You collapsed on her body and when you could feel your hips again, you lifted yourself from the toy and tried to put your clothes on sitting on the log that you were at the beginning.
-"F-Fuck Aggy, that was amazing" - You said trying to catch your breath beside her, but she frowned and stood up from where you were making the purple dildo desapear and closing her clothes again, looking at you confused and remembering that dream that she had before coming to the road, the one where someone called her name, "Please wake up Aggy"... She looked at you
-"What did you said?" - she asked a little mad and lost
-"I said that this was amazing... Are you okay Agatha, you seem pale"- You sat more straight watching her, not fully trusting your legs to stand up yet
-"Yes... I... I will see how the others are doing" - she left you there confused and alone.
After a few minutes you went with the other too.
As time began to pass (you weren't sure how time was inside the road but that perpetual night made you feel like if you were stuck on a loop) Agatha started to ignore you and put more distance than before and that hurt you, specially because you thought that after sex a spark of connection would revive, but nothing happened.
Trying not to let that affect you too much, you stayed near to Lilia because for some reason she made you feel safe, safer that what the purple witch made you feel.
-"So... How was your wife? Like was she a good woman?"- The older asked trying to make conversation and take you away from your sad place and you smiled
-"She is...was... The best. She always treated me with such care, she was always protective. Every morning she woke up earlier to make my favorite coffee before going to work. She always brought me flowers, the most gorgeous bouquets, always with some little purple flowers like lavender between the other bigger ones..."-when you mentioned the color, Lilia frowned, like trying to find something behind the original gesture-"... She held  my hand in the most soft ways and she always hugged me when we watched movies together or to sleep, she always complemented my food and she always brought the dessert when I cooked..."-your voice was full of nostalgia and sadness and your eyes kept wandering off to Agatha every time you spoke and Lilia couldn't avoid but noticed that. She was about to ask something else but she yelled instead
-"You are pregnant?!"- You looked at her confused and everyone turned to look at you. After a few seconds Lilia's mind came back and she smiled at you - "She sounds so lovely..."-everyone keept looking at her "What?" - she asked unaware of what she said before
-"You are pregnant?" - Rio asked and looked at your belly, instinctively your hands went there in a protective way and everyone realized it was true
-"You ARE pregnant?! I mean, I knew my dick was pretty magical but I didn't knew it had that much power" - Agatha made fun of the situation and you frown feeling vulnerable, you didn't wanted them to find out that
-"Please don't give yourself too much credit, this happened before coming here" - You said avoiding looking at her
-"You two had sex here?" - Lilia asked and you didn't even dared to look at her-"Oh honey... What about your wife?" - she seemed truly concerned- "I didn't imagine you as the cheating tipe..."-she seemed disappointed and you felt sick about talking with them about this
-"I didn't cheat... I would never" - You said looking at her eyes, for some reason you cared for her approval
-"Keep telling yourself that but we both know what happened..."-Agatha said in a mocking tone and you roled your eyes
-"I'm not a cheater! Why you don't fucking remember me Aggy?" - You looked into the witch's eyes
-"Oh god..."-Alice said with the pieces falling into place
-"... You didn't cheat, Agatha IS your wife..."-Lilia said and Agatha opened her in surprise-"The stolen glances, the love in your eyes, the constant search for her attention..."
-"That... It's not true... I don't even know you, the first time I saw you in all my life it's when you broke into my house..."-she said no sure about her own words, she didn't remember anything from her last 3 years after all. When Agatha understood why you were there and why you went after her, even if she didn't belive you, you finally felt how a weight was lifted from you, the sigil was broken
-"I didn't broke into your house, it is our house! We lived there for 3 years! But the last days you went crazy and didn't recognize me and kicked me out... And I came back for my clothes when you started chasing me down the road yelling that you were a police woman and that you were going to arrest me... You worked at the supermarket for God's sake! That's how we met... "-you said mad at her
-"That can't be... You are a liar" - she insisted
-"Who do you think that made you food all those years when you couldn't cook even to save your life?! Who do you think that made you company and kept you safe an loved? You truly don't remember my hand holding yours? Many nights spend slepping together? The way how our bodies fit perfectly together?! Nothing?! - You yelled and her eyes went everywhere trying to stop the memories that were appearing on her head
-"All that reality wasn't me, wasn't real! I was just a puppet, a prisoner of my own mind" - Her voice trembled looking at you
-"It was real to me!" - You snapped back and you felt pain in your stomach, you knew you had to calm down
-"I... I'm not that woman and I'm not your wife... And I don't know how that baby appeared, but it isn't mine..."-the witch said standing firmly in front of you and you signed
-"The baby is yours even if you don't want to accept it, I even bet it will look more like you than me, but you are right... You are not my wife anymore... She is not longer there, the only thing I can see in your eyes is your selfinesh for power and I know you will kill anyone in your path to get it, even if it's your baby or your friend, like you had Miss Sharon killed... There is no point for me to keep going down the road when who I'm looking for is dead"-You said with hurt in your voice and started walking on the opposite direction when you were going
-"Where are you going?!" - Lilia yelled
-"To find an exit to this stupid place" - You yelled back and all the witches turned back to look at Agatha
-"She won't last a day alone..."-Jennifer said with consern
-"That is not my problem..."-she flipped her cape and walked on the opposite direction to were you went.
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interruptedtrance · 1 month ago
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Papaya rules (lando x reader x oscar)
Smut; 18+
contains: exhibition, voyeurism, anal, threesome, butt plug, calling lando and oscar daddy and sir, calling you princess, female body anatomy, she her pronouns
rough sex after the hungary gp
masterlist
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the deal in your relationship was whoever wins gets to do whatever they like, today oscar won. 
opening the front door, lando is met with your whiny moans. of course you two are already celebrating oscar’s win, it’s like you have forgotten all about his existence. not wanting to disturb you two he  makes his way to the living room silently praying you two can’t be heard from there. 
mustering up all his strength, he plops himself into the soft sopha and tries tuning out all the noises. hearing you whine to oscar about lando’s lack of presence makes him sit up straight with his heart skipping a beat, so they finally remember me, lando thinks to himself, making his way to the bedroom with a hasty step, almost taking the door off its hinges from how hard he has slammed it open, making both you and oscar jump a bit. 
there you two are, in the middle of your guy’s fluffy bed, oscar with his back leaning against the headboard and you with your legs wrapped around his waist and arms wrapped around his neck, all flustered and red in the face. 
“lando! come and join us” you say quickly
“yes princess”, lando grins, “i see you are waring your toy today, it looks nice in your ass” he praises with a slight smirk.
“thank you daddy, but my ass would look nicer stuffed with your cock” you say as innocently as you can, you know your plan has worked when you feel oscar twitch inside you, and hear lando’s sharp inhale.
“princess, do you think you are ready?” oscar asks, moving his hands from your ass to your waist showing a bit of concern and hesitancy in his eyes.
“i think i am sir”, “please daddy, can we try” shyly you ask, giving lando puppy eyes.
“okay, let’s try” lando says confidently walking over to the nightstand pulling out lube and sitting down on the bed, “come oscar, let them off for a second”
“or we can do this while princess here is sitting on me” oscar said it more as a command than a suggestion, “i mean her tight pussy feels too good to even go a second without it”
“fine, are you alright with that princess?” he asks giving you the most concerned look ever.
“i am, just please go slow” you whisper, tucking your face into oscar’s chest, with him moving his hands up to your back as an extra piece of comfort.
“i will, i promise” and so lando began prepping you, slowly taking out the plug, you moan at the sudden empty feeling, which is soon replaced by one of his lubed up fingers entering you, whining again into oscar’s neck gets you reworded with a kiss from him to the side of the head, and praise form lando with more promise he will go slow, and he does. 
he moves his finger in and out of you, curling it a bit as he enters you again, once oscar feels you relax in his arms he gives a little nod of go ahead to lando to add another finger. with a little shudder coming from you, and even more praise from the guys, lando maneges to put in a second finger, he continues the slow repetitive motion of moving his fingers in and out and slightly curling them while he gets you all comfortable for him.
“please daddy, can i have your cock now?” you ask almost fucked out of your mind “i need you, i might cum soon”
“yes princess let me adjust first” and so he takes his hand away, sits down, legs following yours and going over oscars, gently he places both of his hands against your waist alongside oscar’s and lifts you just a tiny bit, so he can adjust his now very well lubed up cock against your hole, “ready?” he asks worry still lacing his voice
“yes daddy” you say determined, and so lando lowers you back down, where in your pussy you are filled by oscar and in your ass by lando, “yes, thank you daddy, thank you sir” you moan out in pure bliss, with a slight pant in your voice you tell them to move. 
they start moving in sync, slowly and slowly pace growing faster and harder, especially when both can feel the other move inside you, urging each other to hit the perfect spot inside you, with each thrust from them your body feels more lip, especially now that your head is supported by oscar’s shoulder and you're just a moaning mess, no coherent words can be pulled from you. 
“princess, are you close? i can feel you tightening around me” oscars says, nicely moving his head so he can get a glimpse of your expression.
“yes sir, please don’t stop” you say no louder than a whisper.
“don’t worry princess we won’t” lando says sincerely, “cum when you have to, i know you are our good girl just waiting for permission”
“thank you daddy” before you are able to finish your sentence you release around oscar, the tightening around him makes him release with your orgasm, and lando hearing oscar groan from pleasure with a final thrust releases in you. 
“let me go get a towel” lando says, removing himself swiftly from the mess of limbs all you have become now. with a little whine you look at oscar, it’s like he can read your mind. before lando returns to the bedroom from the on suite bathroom, oscar picks you up in his arms, slowly sliding out of you and carefully making his way over to where lando is. he gently places you down on the countertop, and lets you go with one final kiss on your lips. he makes his way to the bath, letting it fill with water and bubbles from the soap he has put in, until the bath is full you three share small short intimate kisses.
“come, the bath is full” lando says between kisses, picking you up in his arms he makes his way to the bath, letting oscar go in first so he can gently lower you into his arms, and lay your back against his chest, with a final kiss to your forehead he joins the bath behind oscar.
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fancyfeathers · 7 days ago
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How would the batfam react to the daughter darling not becoming more cold towards them but slowly starting to distance herself away from them cause she’s suspicious of them? Like she’s sweet to mother darling and so everyly loving and affectionate to the mother darling but the moment Tim walks in she pretends he doesn’t exist.
Daughter darling if she found out the black mail.
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Yandere Batfam w/ Wife/Mother!Darling & Daughter/Sister!Darling Masterlist Lmao ya she is about ready to throw hands for her mother, but I think I covered it a bit here
But she is going to be fed up eventually, she had a perfect life with Mother!Darling and she looked up to her mother so much before this all happened, a celebrity, a fashion icon, and yet the perfect mother who always had time for her little girl. Like the time they were at their home in New York City because Mother!Darling, being the well known icon she is, was going to host some sort of party perhaps even something like the Met Gala and she was watching her mama be interviewed before the event proper as she was to be hosting it and the way she carried herself with so much confidence and charisma was amazing.
“Oh I will be wearing a necklace that has been given to me on lone by one of the jewelry houses of Paris.”
“How many carats is it?”
“Enough.”
“Could you buy it?”
“I mean I certainly could, but I rather spend one hundred and fifty million dollars on my daughter and buy her the world rather than a necklace.”
When her mother marries Bruce all that side of her mother goes away, she feels like a dead version of who she wants was, only having energy to care for her little girl who so desperately clings to her mother. She forces smiles for the cameras and laughs for the interviews but she just lets Bruce put on most of the act of charisma she used to on behalf of the happy couple.
She watches everything as she grows up and then by the time she is in her preteens she is painfully aware of everything, secret identities, the behavior. She’s just done with everything and she completely shuts everyone and everything out, especially after she learns about the blackmail.
She attempts to run away, leaving the manor while everyone is out on patrol and Mother!Darling is having some late night tea with Alfred. Waiting at an empty train station and she knows it’s all over when she sees Dick in his Nightwing costume come up to her. Despite her clear anger he is calm and patient with her, sitting down next to her, wanting to talk it out as if it was just a child throwing a fit, but it ends in him forcibly dragging her off while she cries and screams at him.
Now since is is going to find out when she’s older and smarter it isn’t like when she was a child and she had to go the corner for being disrespectful, she actually knows information that could be used against them, their secret identities along with the blackmail. She can try and distance herself all she like that doesn’t change the fact of what is going to happen, strict schedule, when she’s at school she never leaves Damian’s sight because she needs to go in order to keep up appearances (even if they are different ages they can have her bumped up a class or two, work through those grades with extra homeschooling or summer classes), at home she is either in her room under lock and key when no one is with her (and no she cannot be alone with Mother!Darling anymore), and when she is out and about one of her brothers or father is always with her (it is honestly so embarrassing to her when Bruce introduces her as his darling baby girl when she has to go with him into work at Wayne Enterprises, she’s sixteen now, not seven). Then the worst time is after the Justice League knew Batman’s identity and an emergency meeting came up when he was taking her to a museum for a school project so Batman just shows up with this teenage girl who looks pissed off as hell and looks like she is going to bite the next person who treats her like a child.
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seniswriting · 23 days ago
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Compliqué | LN4
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Pairings: Lando x Secret Friend!Reader & Lando x Girlfriend!Magui
Summary: Lando was known for his playboy reputation and people thought he just enjoyed being the center of attention, and the thrill of going from a woman to another. In the end, rumors are just rumors and they were never completely true. But such manners can only ever be detrimental to one's life...
Warnings: cheating, a little bit angsty, mentions of drinking and inappropriate themes
Note: This derived so far from what I initially intended to write...
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"Don't look at me like that, please..."
He said with a pained expression as he sat on the tiled floor of his bathroom, leaning against the wall. He looked like a wreck. Not a human, but a shell.
I was sitting on the closed lid of the toilet, resting my elbows on my knees, with a glass of water in my hand, while looking down on him with a frown. I hated the sight even though it was nothing too unfamiliar.
I knew he despised it when I gave him those eyes. It felt like a reprimand to him. He knew I was judging him in the slightest, but I didn't mean to make him guilty for having fun. He just pushed it too far tonight. As far as Max Fewtrell having to call me to pick him up, even though he has never even met me before.
"Don't you remember what we talked about? No more using alcohol and sex as means of escapism. Yet, look at yourself."
The words came out harshly, showing just how exasperated I was due to his behavior. Just a month ago, he had promised to never fall into excessive drinking again. But surprise! After weeks of not communicating, the first thing I hear about is him getting shit-faced drunk at Jimmy'z?!
And like every time I have called him out on his attitude and lack of clear judgment, Lando simply glared at me in apparent annoyance. We spent a few minutes staring at each other. The silence was heavy. It was weighed by unspoken complaints from me and baseless excuses from him. As if to make peace, I just gave him the glass of water and stood up.
"I will call Margarida so she can come over and take care of you."
I knew he wouldn't want her to see him like this, but I couldn't just leave him alone and neither could I stay over. And like I knew it would, the protest came out of his mouth the second I mentioned his girlfriend.
"What?! No. Why would you do that!"
I hit the nail. He didn't want anyone to see him in a vulnerable state. He wanted everyone to think he was just a reckless fun guy, not a broken mess hiding behind prodigal tendencies. I didn't know exactly why he drank so much yet. But I had my idea because it was always the same thing. He was lonely. He didn't know why but he was. Despite having so many friends to hang around, he never felt attached to most of them. It were as if all he could make were fleeting connections. As if nobody ever reciprocated his feelings. So he shut most of them down from the public and kept anything too sincere at an arm's length.
How did I figure it out? Ever since we met a year ago, Lando kept me as far as possible from his usual group of friends. I never met them and we rarely talked about them. He rarely sought out for me but when he did, he became a very distinct person from whom he was on the racetrack or whom he was with his friends and family.
He wasn't the sunshine to my shadow. He was as empty as one.
"You can't be left alone like this, and you know it. Have a good night."
I finally stated. I didn't wait for his response. I just walked out of his apartment and if I expected him to chase after me, he didn't.
It wasn't new. It was normal for us. We were the closest sometimes, but most of the time, we were just two people who knew of each other's existence.
I used to want to keep us constant and stable but he told me it was unnecessary. That we weren't meant to be pressured to maintain communication. That we were the best kind of spontaneous, even though it wasn't all that joyous.
We were us, but we weren't together. I was hurt. I didn't let that deteriorate our connection though.
If I called, he would be there. If I didn't, he wouldn't be there. It was simple.
If he called, I would be there. If he didn't, I wouldn't be there but I would always have him in the back of my mind.
That's what I told myself until I couldn't help it. I returned back to my old ways. He didn't question it. He just went with it.
He was right when he said I overcomplicated everything. But didn't he do the same too by running away from his emotions?
A few days following the night I picked Lando up from the club, I sent him a text to check up on him.
He didn't even call me once after I had helped him, but it was normal. We always needed to let things simmer before talking it out. And usually, I was the one in charge of initiating the impending conversation.
"Hey, are you okay? The hangover must've been terrible..."
The key to getting a response from him was to start off sweetly, as if I were sorry for whatever had happened. Then, I would only have to wait for a few minutes before getting a reply.
I was proud of our communication pattern, even though it wouldn't be ideal for anyone else. I cracked the code and I took pride in it. Lando was still a man. He left most women on 'delivered' for several hours before responding; but not me.
I always tried to talk to him at the same time on Friday nights, when I knew he couldn't be drinking. He needed to be sober for his races and time zones were mostly in my favor as it was broad daylight wherever he was.
He was also aware of my texting routine, and it became a silent agreement that he needed to reciprocate my effort of keeping in touch every once in a while, when we weren't pushed together by misery.
However, the latter part never worked because the only thing we could bond over was our personal suffering. And there was no one to blame for our ephemeral status, apart from ourselves.
"Yeah it was bad. Cant believe you left me"
The notification made my screen light up and I was met with the very answer I had expected from him. I didn't believe in matching the energy of your interlocutor, so I stayed true to my typical wording. That was the charm in our relationship, after all. Together, we were ourselves. We didn't need to walk on eggshells. We could set the temperature as we wanted.
"Don't be dramatic. Magui helped you, didn't she?"
"She didnt even come home"
"Oh... Uhm, sorry... Do you want to hang out?"
"Meet me in 5?"
"How do I even get there in five minutes? But sure, just for you xx"
He didn't need to tell me where I was supposed to go. We were familiar to the point most things were unspoken and natural - whether it was bad or not, I didn't care much, we weren't committed anyway.
I arrived at what I had secretly started calling my second home. A place etched with memories of us. A place of comfort for my loneliest moments. It wasn't exactly mine though.
Lando was already there, scrolling on his phone while laying on the large sunbed on the
front dock of his yacht. I quietly went up to him to lay down by his side. He didn't acknowledge my presence for a second, but then he put his mobile down to finally look at me.
We stared at each other in silence before his gaze flickered down; that was when I felt the need to speak up.
"What's happening with Margarida?"
He grimaced at the cold interruption of what he probably wanted to do for quite some time. I was aware of his physical attraction to me, but I didn't want to indulge too much in what a man who had a partner and a million fans had to offer. I was not going to stoop that low; being his friend already seemed scandalous enough for us to keep ourselves in hiding.
"Don't even bring her up right now, love."
Love? That must have been a slip-up but it sounded quite natural to him. But who was he kidding? He was reputed for being a flirt. I wasn't going to let myself be one of his generic victims; so I told him off on the inappropriate use of the nickname, which did not faze him in the slightest. Instead, he joked about my princess side coming out again.
He slowly wrapped his hand around my waist and pulled me close to him. I knew where this was going and I didn't know if I hated or loved it. I felt his hand inch lower and lower, until I stopped him once again despite the tension that had built up in the air. His hand was right on my inner thigh as I looked at him with suspicious eyes. He knew I wanted this though, and the only thing that held me back was my conscience. I wasn't the kind of girl who took any chance she got, especially if the man she loved already had another waiting for him somewhere.
I gently pushed him away and sat up to watch the beautiful sunset view offered by the monégasque coast. He didn't resist it, neither did he complain. He simply mimicked my movements and silently watched as the sky painted the end of another day, of another story.
When the night had completely fallen, a unified sigh escaped our minds. We knew we had to end our journey there. We knew there was nowhere else we could go; that caring so much from the start was a mistake.
We held each other tightly for a moment. We held onto whatever there was left of us.
A tear encapsulating every conversation and every emotion we had ever shared slid down my cheek. It landed in a loud thud on the leather. It felt like a bucket of cold water. We were not what we used to be, and reality finally caught up on us.
It was not about being lonely together anymore. It was not about confessing our deepest pains anymore. We were about to cross a line that shouldn't be crossed. What we thought was sympathy had somehow turned into more than what we could both handle. We started seeking for salvation in each other.
Lingering glances. Crippling tension. Bottled attraction. Little touches. Things we pretended never happened. Everything we ignored slowly burned us down into nothing. And if we didn't want the world to fade away with us, we had to let go.
"Always so damn complicated."
"Only with you."
That was our goodbye. Just like how we started, we ended with no real closure. We walked into each other's life like it was a hotel and checked out, paying the price of a separation that was overdue. It was thoughtless and casually intimate, until it went bordering on the edge of something.
I knew I would fall when he approached me, and I bet he knew he would eventually join me.
Knowing doesn't mean anything though. The theoretical loses on the material. And in reality, the socialite never commits to the prettiest loner.
-
Note: I liked this when I first finished it, but it kind of feels lacking now that I've read it again... I don't know how to feel about it, but I really enjoyed writing this. Don't hesitate to share your opinion, I would love to get some feedback ^^
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girliemattitude · 6 months ago
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-- Guilty as Sin?- - M.S - -
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A/N (1): I saw someone on @mattscoquette account saying how Matt was so ‘Guilty as Sin’ coded so I had to do it 🫶🏼 A/N (2): This turned out a little longer than what I expected because it has some introductory stuff at the beginning but I swear you’ll get what you came here for <3 💋 A/N(3): this is my work, please don’t steal it :)
………………………………………………………………………………….……………………
Me and my boyfriend Langdon have been together for about eight months now. I was never the type who wanted a serious relationship, everything about love cringed me out but there was something about him that intrigued me a lot, maybe It was the fact that he’s very tall and confident or his dreamy green eyes but I don’t know.
Our relationship was very good in the beginning, my friends used to make fun of me saying that I became what I swore to destroy because I acted like those annoying girlfriends who can’t shut up about their boyfriends, so annoying right?, anyways now I realize that what I felt wasn’t real because I didn’t really know him well so I idealized him and fell for a perfect version of him who I created but only existed in my head.
Is not like he’s a terrible person but he’s definitely not a good boyfriend, at first he was very attentive and sweet but as the months passed he started to be more distant, it seems like he’s not very interested in me anymore, we barely talk, when I ask about his day he answers with a quick “it was a’ight” but never returns the question, we don’t go on dates, we don’t even cuddle, all we do is hang at his apartment but he’s always to busy on his phone to pay any attention to me so I just stare at the tv pretending I’m interested in the show or movie he put on and at night sometimes we have sex, On the weekends he usually goes MIA and I won’t hear about him until Monday just to find out he was ‘out with the boys’. The sex has change too, he used to make me feel good and wanted, like it was an enormous privilege to have me, he always make sure I got cleaned up afterwards and that I received cuddles or water or whatever I wanted but now it’s always so dull and dreary, I feel used afterwards, he doesn’t make eye contact with me, it’s like he’s only concern is himself and his pleasure so I just lay there, during he asks if I’m okay, he states how good he feels and after he’s done he asks if I came, I never do but I always lie to him, he puts his shorts back on and then goes on his phone again, so I go the bathroom,I clean myself and then I go back to bed feeling empty.
I tried to talk to Langdon about it, I told him we have a problem but he brushed it off saying that I’m nuts and that we are better than ever. I’ve gotten used to it by now, I know I could just break up with him but there’s a tiny bit of hope that thinks he’ll change so I stay.
Lately I’ve been feeling some type of way about my friend Matt, I’m very close with him and his brothers, I mean we’ve known in each for a long time now and yes I used to have a little crush on him but that was ages ago and it went away so I convinced myself that what I was feeling currently was the same silly feeling I once had and that it will go away just like last time, the problem was that this time was different it was harder to ignore, it was more intense and it filled my mind with crazy thoughts. It started one day at the warehouse, I was sitting on a large table typing the last details of an essay when all of the sudden my laptop shut down even though it was completely charged, I was freaking out when Matt entered the room, he asked what was wrong and after I answered him he position himself behind me, both of his arms were on each side of me and I could feel his scent on my nose and his warm breath on my face, he was trying to figure out what had happened to my laptop but all I could focused on was his hands, holy shit they’re veiny and his fingers looked so long pressing buttons on the keyboard, my breath hitched and I know should’ve but i didn’t look away, I tried to I swear but when I gazed to the side I saw his tattooed arm and I pictured myself tracing the lines of them, I heard him murmured an almost none audible “fuck” that sent vibrations to my whole body, specially in between my legs. I still don’t know how long I was zoned out but suddenly the laptop was back on and he said “there you go sweetheart” and give me a soft smile.
That night I was in my bed alone and I couldn’t stop thinking about those hands, my heartbeat started to race as I imagined how it would feel to have his hands squeezing my hips as he pulls me in for a kiss, I thought that I would bet millions of dollars he’s a good kisser, would he bite my lip?, how would does longs fingers feel inside of me? . I couldn’t stop wondering, my head was fuzzy, my fingers went from resting on my stomach to under my panties and before I realized what I was doing I touched my clit with my middle finger, slowly and in circles, Matt and how his warm breath felt against my skin never left my mind, a familiar sensation of pleasure overflowed my body and I let out a moan which put me out off my trance and I stoped myself from going further. I kept on telling myself that Matt’s just a nice guy who happens to be very attractive and that I was confused because I felt horny and lonely, but that didn’t stop me because the next morning while I was showering my mind went back to Matt and I pictured him in there with me, he’s wet hair and naked body, he’s dick pressed against my back, his lips on my neck leaving messy and sloppy kisses, one of his hands all over my boobs and the other inserting his fingers inside of me and I couldn’t stop, I imagined him talking me threw it until I came undone screaming the name of one of my closest friends. After that I avoided the whole crew for I couple of days, I felt so guilty, I avoided Langdon too but that wasn’t that hard, it’s not like he was eager to see me either.
Yesterday I saw my friends again we went to a scape room and I tried to avoid Matt as much as I could, after that we went to a pizza place, as we were waiting for the pizza Nick and Chris went to the bathroom and Madi was on her phone, I was pretending to be on my phone too so I wouldn’t have to speak to Matt, he was sitting in front of me and I felt him stare but I didn’t looked up. He quickly switched seats and sat beside me, I ignored him again, I thought I succeeded when I saw Nick and Chris approach us but I was wrong, Matt got even nearer to me and whispered in my ear “is it just me or a you avoiding me today?” I told him he was crazy and that we were good but I don’t think he believed me, I’m a terrible liar but even if I wasn’t I know he noticed how my body froze when he whispered to me and how my eyes didn’t locked with his even once, he didn’t talk much after that little interaction between us. I know him, I know he was overthinking about why I was acting this way towards him, and I felt terrible but how I’m suppose to tell him that I’m the worst person alive because even though I have a boyfriend I can’t get him out off my head, that I keep recalling things we never did, that I can’t look at him in the eyes without having an unbearable need to kiss him, that I want him to hold me at night, or how we’ve already done it in my head and how that was the best orgasm I’ve had in the longest time or how it’s not only a sexual thing but also the fact that I’m pretty sure I’m in love with him?
Right now it’s the next day and I’m in my boyfriends couch, he’s beside me playing some video game, I’m looking at the screen and I hear gunshots and one of his friends yelling from the headphones he has on but my mind is on Matt once again, everyday day that goes by I feel worse, I know he’s frustrated because he knows something’s wrong but I can’t tell him, and my stupid boyfriend is next to me and doesn’t know shit, which makes me feel even worse, Langdon swears we are perfectly fine and I can’t help but feel like a cheater, I hate cheaters yet I am one, I haven’t touched Matt but mentally I’m full of sin.
Last night I told everything to my friend Madi, who stayed the night at my house to keep me company ‘cause “I seemed off”, of course she noticed too, everyone did, even Chris who’s always distracted asked me what the fuck was going on with me.
After I told Madi she stated that I shouldn’t feel guilty about anything,that we can’t control our thoughts but we can control our actions and I haven’t done anything wrong, she also told me I should break up with Langdon and tell the truth because i would be surprised to know what Matt feels too, I still don’t know what Matt feels, she wouldn’t tell me but it doesn’t matter, I can’t do that, I know Langdon hasn’t been the best boyfriend but he’s not a bad person, I just don’t want to hurt anyone but I guess that’s inevitable. Maybe our relationship is just in a rough patch and If I put more effort into it we’ll work it out and possibly light up the fire again. Yes that’s probably it, In a couple of days everything will go back to normal and I’ll stop getting those crazy thoughts.
Langdon gets off his game and asks me if I’m hungry, I say we should go out to eat since we haven’t done that in a while but he doesn’t want to so I offer to cook us something instead and he agrees, I smile big at him and suggest we could make dinner together but he just says “nah” and goes back to his game, but it’s okay I’m not giving up. I make some quick mac and cheese and we eat in silence, he offers to wash the dishes and I let him, baby steps I think to myself.
I stare at him as he’s cleaning the counter and I analyze him, he’s way taller than Matt, and more muscular, he’s eyes are green, not blue, he’s hair is lighter and slightly longer, he doesn’t have any tattoos and his hands are bigger. Overall they are both completely different people, even their personalities don’t match but weirdly the two of them are my type, which doesn’t really matter because I shouldn’t be comparing them anyway.
I walked over to Langdon and I intertwined my hands over his shoulders, I gave him puppy eyes and I stand on my tiptoes to give him a kiss, a genuine kiss he laughs and says “what was that for?”
“I just felt like kissing you, is there something wrong with that?” I reply with and innocent tone before I kiss him again, this time is a longer kiss, it gets heated pretty fast, he pulls me into his hard abdomen, grabbing my ass with both of his hand and I start to feel the bulge between his legs getting bigger. I pull apart out of breath and I ask him to take me to the bedroom, he doesn’t waste any time as he lifts me up effortlessly, my legs are up in the air and I’m being carried to his room. I can’t help but to think about how Matt wouldn’t lift me up as easily as Langdon just did and how I would tease him about it, (c’mon Matt I’m not that heavy) a giggle at the thought and my boyfriends looks at me weird; “what’s so funny?”, oh fuck, I gotta stop, “nothing don’t worry about it”. He puts me down on the bed and gets rid of his all of his clothes, except his underwear, I do the same and we go back to kissing, he’s laying on top of me, he starts giving me kisses on my jaw and goes down to my neck and collarbones, I support myself on my elbows so he could take my bra off, he squeeze one of my boobs and gently tease the other one with his mouth, murmuring things I can’t understand, all I I can do is moan at the feeling. I decide to take a little bit of control and I switch our position, now he’s laying on his back and I straddle him, I give kisses on his abdomen, down to his happy trail and before I reach his boxers I lick him sensually all the way up until I meet his lips again, I kissed him and I bite his bottom lip, “you are such a tease you know that sweetheart”, sweetheart, he never calls me that, that’s what Matt calls me, why I’m a thinking about Matt again?, I shake my head trying to brush off the thoughts and I remove his underwear, he sits up so we are chest to chest, I take a look at his hard cock and I stroke him a couple of times before I put my panties to the side and I aligned myself into him, I sink into him and the both of us let out a sigh of relief once he’s all in, he kisses me and I start to move back and forth slowly, he guides my hips until we found a nice rhythm, he’s groaning and I moan, my moans gets even louder once i start bouncing up and down on him, and it feel so good, he grabs my ass and my hands are on his shoulders for support, i close my eyes and suddenly I’m in Matt’s bed instead, his brown hair is sticking to his forehead, he’s blue eyes are lock in mine and they look much darker now due to his pupils being dilated, his cheeks are tinted pink and his mouth is open, I see his horse necklace moving along with our movements, his chest moves at a rapid pace as well considering that he’s out of breath. I whine so loudly and I rolled my head back at the overwhelming feeling and his left hand goes to my neck bringing me back to him “press harder, pleeaa-ssee” I say between heavy breaths, “yeah? You want me to choke a little do ya’?” “Omg, yess” , “all you had to do was ask baby”. My only response being the sounds leaving my throat, I place one of my hands on top of his left one that’s choking me and my other one goes to his forearm arm caressing his tattoos. I swear I could stay like this forever; “fuck, you’re so pretty, so perfect, just for me, shit I’m gonna cum babe ” “nonono, wait for me, I’m close”
I feel how his dick twitches a little inside of me, my movements increase even more and I start to tremble as I hit my climax and finally that familiar knot on my stomach pops and I came harder than ever, my eyes are close as I ride off my orgasm, my breaths are still irregular and when they’re about to go back to normal I hear “That was so good baby” and my eyes go wide open in shock. Langdon has a fucked out look on his face but he’s smiling at me with a huge grin and once again I feel like absolute garbage, I get off of him and i quickly go to the bathroom, tears are filling my eyes, am i allowed to cry?, my heart is full of guilt and regret, I cannot believe I fucked my boyfriend thinking about Matt but what surprised me the most is that even though i feel terrible, the back of my mind is thinking… ‘if I just came this hard just by the thought of him, how good would it feel to actually have sex with Matt? Does that make me mad? or bad?’ I have no clue all I know is that Madi is right, I have to break things off with Langdon.
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3liza · 1 month ago
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what tumblr is *actually* really particularly good at as a group rather than as individual famous posters (such as dril on twitter), and this is something we share with 4chan, is originating and then popularizing particular jokes and meme phrases. we are good at coining things. "coining a phrase" means to say something with a particular flourish or carefully-chosen compositional attention in an effort to make the phrase "stick" in some way. for example, "stop trying to make 'fetch' happen" (which became a meme in of itself) is a response to a person attempting to coin a phrase--in this case, referring to things as "fetch" (adjective)--in a way that is not working. i think that tumblr, as a group, is very good at making fetch happen.
"blorbo" is a perfect example of a word that was made up on tumblr and has now become widespread over multiple social networks and is in (limited) use in irl verbal conversation. whatever our personal individual feelings on it (and a lot of us are fed up with it/find the term annoying because it got REALLY saturated here) it's so good that it will likely (i think! this is my prediction) become a permanent resident in american slang as long as it is useful, and this is because there was an empty space where that term was needed: a term for a person from a work of fiction that the speaker (the person who says "blorbo from my shows" in the hypothetical scenario invoked by the post) is particularly interested in, but whom the listener (the hypothetical "you") has no familiarity with.
fandom as an activity is extremely old at this point (no not dante's inferno fuck off) so it's likely we have had terms like this before that either weren't successfully coined, deprecated out of common usage, or which i personally am not familiar with. but when the blorbo post was made, there was an empty space where that term WAS needed in many conversations that were being had. oh yeah, blorbo from your shows. all my friends have blorbos from their shows. i do not have a pre-existing term for this, i would have just referred to that concept as "characters from shows i havent watched, which my friends talk about all the time". it is convenient to have the term "blorbo" for this, and it was particularly canny as a choice of phonemes because it references how fucking stupid all the Star Wars Expanded Universe names are (and always have been, speaking as an old school SWEU fan [NOT ANYMORE]). ponda baba? sebulba? max rebo. the intergalactic jizz wailers. sy snootles. fuck off
coining a phrase successfully actually uses marketing principles, or vice versa really, to launch a word that "sticks". we can use "fetch" as the counter-example: there was no demand for "fetch" in that market (the setting of the film).
this is a sort of cousin to the now-deprecated phrase "it's all greek to me", which meant "i don't understand this, it is as unfamiliar to me as someone speaking greek, a language i dont understand [and which is considered by my culture to be difficult to understand and/or archaic]". but instead of invoking an actual language to exemplify
EDIT 6:19AM PST: i apparently just hit "Post" before finishing the post. i think i had more thoughts about "its all greek to me" but i dont know what they were and its not important
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perfectlyoongi · 5 months ago
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FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
ㅤ↬┊synopsis ... you had to write a poem for a class and, when your creativity betrayed you, you decided to ask your boyfriend for help.
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ㅤ⚘.fandom ... bts. ㅤㅤಇ.ft. ... yoongi x afab!reader. ㅤ⚘.genre ... one-shot. ㅤㅤಇ.content ... childhood friends & lovers (established relationship), fluff, just the complicity between u and yoongi. ㅤㅤಇ.word count ... 2k. ㅤ⚘.fandom ... ik as much abt writing poetry as ik abt quantum physics so u get no poem shoo shoo !! ps. dont mind the cringe :3 hope u enjoy ♡
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“Come on, Yoonie!” you let out a small laugh when Yoongi grimaced as he shook his arm out of your hands. “Help me.”
“So annoying,” Yoongi prolonged the last word in a dramatic cry that made you laugh one last time. “Okay, I’ll help you.”
You quickly sat down on the black sofa in Yoongi's studio, on your lap a small notebook eager to be filled, in your hand a pencil half corroded by your thoughts. Yoongi sat next to you, in his hand a bottle of partially drunk water, in his eyes a sparkle that only appeared when he was with you.
“What do you need to do?”
“The professor asked for a poem and we had to draw the theme out of a hat.”
“And you got…”
“Love.”
Your response was accompanied by a frown on your part.
Since you remembered that you were submerged in a vast ocean of verses and stanzas, all the themes that could exist building little huts in your heart, creating fragments in your soul that would be forever united by your love for writing. And you wanted to know more about this art. You wanted to be able to create like so many others before you. You wanted to give your creativity a purpose and, with Yoongi's encouragement, you joined creative writing classes at your university.
But, as with everything, the dream became more fantastic than reality.
It was part of the challenge and it made you excited, more eager to create. But it was also tiring, spending days and nights pondering words and themes that could very well carry with them empty meanings and silent beauties. You wrote in constant fear of not being interpreted, of not being worthy of interpretation, of creating something too vague to have any value.
Everything was challenging for you, all the poems you had written to date being the result of too many thoughts and too little passion. So, when you got a theme as common and used as love, you only saw a solution to truly create a piece of art – after all, love only existed for you with Yoongi by your side.
“I kinda feel offended by your reaction,” Yoongi forced a frown and you smiled.
“Don’t start, please,” you opened the notebook and took a deep breath. “How am I supposed to start?”
“You can start by…” Yoongi was thoughtful for a moment, involuntarily playing with the bottle in his hands. “Trying to describe what love is to you?”
Your silence was capable of speaking louder than any words you could have said – and that only made Yoongi let out a small laugh.
Adjusting himself on the couch to get closer to you, Yoongi looked at you curiously. You had a serene expression, but your eyes showed that all the threads inside you were trying to interconnect to form a simple description. Leaning his arm against the back of the sofa and holding his head, Yoongi looked at you amused.
“Do you need help?” Yoongi asked cordially, a smile lacing his words, his voice gently echoing through the studio.
“You know I’m terrible with feelings.”
“I’m no better.”
“But you write songs.”
“Because you inspire me!”
You already knew that. Yoongi had already told you countless times that great inspiration for his songs came from you, from the feeling he had for you; but that didn't stop you from reacting, completely embarrassed by your boyfriend's confession.
“Then give me tips!”
“I don't know!” Yoongi opened his arms in a dramatic way, fanning them to emphasize his speech. “I just feel it and the words come and the song gets written.”
You snorted to hide a smile and calmed down again, your back leaning against the sofa, your eyes jumping from the pencil to the blank page.
“And what do you feel?”
Your question hung in the air for a brief moment as Yoongi contemplated your words.
In Yoongi's mind, dozens of words began to appear quickly, constantly running over each other, wanting to be the first to be pronounced. In Yoongi's heart, dozens of emotions began to gently blossom, taking root in Yoongi, assuring his feelings for you.
The pause wasn't long, but for you it was an eternity.
The eagerness for an answer made your heart race. You were looking forward to Yoongi's words, not only to inspire you for your poem, but also to hear once again what you meant to him – it was always good to be reassured.
“At this moment…”
Yoongi's voice was hoarse, deep, gently sung by his delicate lips. The words were steeped in care and serenity. You could feel Yoongi's thoughts in his pronunciation, the way he was precisely selecting each word he spoke bringing a smile to your face.
“At this moment, I feel like a kid again.”
“A kid?” you gently tilted your head – of all the strings of words Yoongi could have said, that wasn't one that had crossed your mind.
“Yes,” Yoongi let out a laugh, nostalgia clinging to every syllable, memories of easier times clouding his studio. “Doesn’t this situation remind you of anything?”
Yoongi continued to look at you in love – there was no other word to describe it. The sparkle in Yoongi's eyes was completed by the genuine smile that slightly curved his sweet lips. Yoongi's words were filled with a gentleness that only existed when he spoke to you, about you.
You pondered Yoongi's words. Your boyfriend's voice echoed in your mind with some care, stretching out the syllables, trying to search your memories for the words you should say. And then you remembered.
“The first grade!”
You spoke happily, memories of your childhood painting nostalgic pictures in your head, vibrant colors of happy moments radiating warmth to your heart.
“The first grade,” Yoongi repeated between small laughs as he adjusted himself on the couch. “We spent our afternoons trying to learn math together.”
“And we were never successful.”
Your laughter settled into two broad, longing, passionate smiles.
“I never told you this…” Yoongi was the first to break the silence that rested in the studio, going back to shuffle on the sofa, playing with the bottle a little more. “But, I think I started to like you at that time.”
Your eyes opened in awe, your boyfriend's confession bringing a little warmth to your heart.
“Come on, Yoonie. We were kids. It’s impossible to like someone that way.”
Accompanied by laughter, your words shaped the atmosphere of the studio into a place of comfort, of safety, of confession.
“I’m serious,” Yoongi placed one of his hands on your leg, stroking it gently. “Already at that age I knew that I wanted to stay with you for the rest of my life.”
Like a dove's feather hovering gently on a hot summer day, Yoongi's confession remained in his study as it got to know every nook and cranny, spreading its warmth across the room and nuzzling your heart.
Stay with you for the rest of his life.
In a way, those words danced in your mind, a complex waltz of possible futures moving through the halls of memories. In a way, those words gave you a shy smile, a gentle curve of embarrassment beautifying your face. In a way, those words settled in your heart, a homely comfort soothing your soul.
For the rest of his life.
“And how did you know?”
Your tone of voice was provocative, causing Yoongi to smile smugly.
“Because it was when I was with you that I could see the world in colors.” Yoongi let the bottle fall into his lap, one of his hands shyly searching for yours. “I believe that my life only began the day I met you. I woke up every day looking forward to go to school just to see you. And it was when we started dating that I started thinking about a future for me, for us.”
There was a passionate smile on your lips, a shiny curve that infected Yoongi and encouraged him to gently caress the soft skin of your hand.
“What was love like as a kid?”
“Weird,” a wistful laugh left Yoongi’s lips, his eyes locked on a long-lived past. “I just thought about annoying you just to have an excuse to talk to you.”
“Is that why you always stole my pencils?”
Yoongi shrugged his shoulders with a false air of innocence and you laughed. “But when our friendship started to become more natural, I only thought about you. How it was only with you that I could be myself. How it was only with you that I could really have fun. How you were the only one who gave me a purpose to wake up every day.”
“Do you have any songs about me that you haven’t shown me yet?”
Yoongi laughed, a strong, pink tone taking over his cheeks as he let go of your hand and returned to holding the bottle.
“Let's take it easy. We were talking about your poem.”
“Come on, Yoongi,” you smiled and gently pinched his stomach. “Tell me your secrets!”
Your boyfriend sighed as he let a smile be etched on his face. “I have two. One of them I wrote when I was at school.”
He got up carefully, walking to his desk and picking up a black notebook that was already quite corroded by time: the pages were damaged by humidity and water, the cover was a little torn and folded – that notebook seemed to have been loved.
“I carry this notebook everywhere,” Yoongi sat down next to you again and placed the notebook on his lap, encouraging you to come closer to him. “It’s where I have my first thoughts and songs as a dreamer. Among them the first song I wrote.”
“Rest of my life”, you read Yoongi’s handwriting like an incantation, your lips pronouncing each syllable with the flavor of importance and passion seasoning the title of that song. “Why didn’t you ever show me?”
“I was ashamed. It’s not my best work, y’know?”
“But you still keep it.”
“Because it is my most genuine and heartfelt song.”
Yoongi looked at you and you returned the look. In the shine of your boyfriend's eyes you saw your future together, a home and a family, an eternity of passion and complicity; in the curve of your boyfriend's lips you saw your shared past, infinite stories and memories, an extensive melancholy of a passionate history.
Before you kissed Yoongi, you smiled.
Your lips touched lightly for just a moment but it was enough to send warm waves through your body. It was incredible that after so many years of friendship and dating, Yoongi still had that pleasurable effect on you.
“Can I read it?”
“No,” Yoongi laughed again and closed the notebook.
“Come on! Please, Yoonie.”
Yoongi looked at you thoughtfully, seeing in your pleading eyes and your innocent smile the whole reason for that song. “It was because of you that I started dreaming of a future.”
Somehow, you noticed in Yoongi's shy and reserved tone that those words weren't random, that behind each letter and timbre there was a memory dear to him, a memory of something that was reserved forever in his heart.
“The seeds you planted bloom in my heart. Gardens of tulip petals adorn my desire for a future. I always daydream immersed in swan lakes about a tomorrow with you. I only ask that you stay with me for the rest of my life.”
Even before Yoongi finished his quote, you kissed him again, passion and magic joining your lips in a new promise of love.
“You’re right,” you placed your forehead against Yoongi’s and let out a small laugh. “It’s not your best work.”
“I’m gonna hit you.”
Between laughs, Yoongi kissed you again, pulling away quickly when the memory of the reason for your visit appeared in his mind.
“We’ve already talked about me, let’s go back to the poem.”
“I think I understand what I have to do,” your pencil twirled in your hand as words began to unite a web of thoughts inside your heart. “I just have to remember all the ways you love me and make me feel loved.”
Yoongi kissed your forehead before leaving you immersed in feelings and phrases, a little encouragement from Yoongi before he returned to his work.
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ㅤㅤ♡ feedback is appreciated ♡
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astrcmoni · 2 months ago
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ੈ✩‧₊˚Avec toi, je suis chez moiੈ✩₊˚
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pairing: billie eilish x fem!reader
warning- none except that you might cry(?)
wc: 1.8k… i don’t think i’ll ever write anything under 1k
authors note: if you don’t know what the title means it’s french, meaning “with you, i am home”.
edit: idk if i like this anymore🧍🏾‍♀️
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Nervous. That’s what you felt as you rushed through the bustling streets of Chicago, your heart pounding in your ears. You looked around frantically, weaving through the crowd, eyes darting across each building until you finally saw it—the stadium. It towered over you like a beacon, glowing under the night sky. Breath hitching, you stopped for a second to catch it. That’s when you heard it. The melody of her voice. The thrumming of the beat. The vibrations of the bass. It all floated through the glass doors and straight into your body. each note vibrating in your chest, pulling you like an invisible thread.
Pushing through the entrance, you approached the front desk, showing the clerk your ticket. Instead of tearing it and handing you a stub, she shook her head, almost smiling. She motioned toward the backstage area, her intentions clear. But you gently refused her kind gesture, insisting—almost pleading—to let you join the general area, where you could be in the crowd with everyone else, feel the energy firsthand.
After what felt like forever, she sighed and relented, her brows furrowed like she couldn’t understand why anyone would give up such a golden opportunity just to be squished in a pit with a bunch of sweaty, screaming fans.
The screams grew louder and louder as you made your way toward the heart of the stadium. The chant of thousands rising up to the rafters, vibrating through your bones.
“Billie, Billie, Billie…” They sang her name like a prayer, like a hymn to their goddess.
The theatre came into view, and you had to stop yourself from gaping at the sight. People were packed shoulder-to-shoulder, the space bursting at the seams with bodies and voices. You murmured small “excuse me’s” and “sorry’s” as you squeezed past, trying not to step on too many feet or jostle too many shoulders until you finally found a good spot near the front.
Walking through rows of bodies, you murmured small “excuse me’s” and “sorry’s” as you brushed past shoulders and accidentally stepped on toes. When you finally found a good spot, you rooted yourself to the ground. The stage loomed ahead of you, stretching wider than you’d imagined—an expanse of sleek black and shimmering lights. But before you could take it all in, the house lights dimmed, casting the stadium in a sea of darkness.
A soft guitar strum filled the air, the first few notes fluttering like a heartbeat. Then, from somewhere high above, a black platform began to lower, and there she was—in all her effortless glory. Sporting yet another one of her oversized jerseys along with a baseball cap, Billie’s silhouette cut a striking figure against the smoke and spotlights.
“i’m trying my best, to keep you satisfied...”
Her voice was more than angelic—it was otherworldly, like it could reach deep into your soul and fill every empty space. It made your entire body go still, goosebumps rising along your skin. It was as if you’d been yanked out of reality and thrown into some surreal dream, like she was your guide to a place beyond pain or stress, where only her voice existed.
Feeling as if you’d ascended into the heavens and were being welcomed by God himself, each note wrapping around you like a warm embrace, soothing every ache you’d been carrying for the past two months.
Every time she sang, it was like she poured her entire heart into each note, every syllable dripping with raw emotion. She moved around the stage with an ease you hadn’t seen in so long, lying on her back, staring up at the sky, just… lost in the music. Seeing her like this—completely at peace and at home—made something warm bloom in your chest. You couldn’t help but beam with pride, feeling like you were going to burst with how happy you were just to see her again.
It had been almost two months since you’d last seen her in person. College and tour had become separate worlds, tearing you apart and leaving this gaping rift between you two. The balance you used to have was shattered into a million pieces, no matter how much you tried to pick them up. It wasn’t that you weren’t both trying—of course, you were. It was just that time zones, schedules, and everything in between made it near impossible to connect.
Nights turned into weeks where you’d wear her hoodies to sleep, drown yourself in her favorite scents, and even try her diet, just to feel something like her presence. But instead of getting closer, you found yourself grasping at straws—like trying to hold onto water slipping through your fingers.
When you found out about her show in Chicago, you packed your bags without a second thought. You’d rushed your assignments, booked the earliest flight, and somehow managed to snag a last-minute ticket. That’s how you ended up here, front row, heart pounding as you watched her sing.
Being in the crowd was different from watching backstage. Here, you could truly see her, raw and unfiltered. You could feel the way she poured every ounce of herself into her performance, connecting with every person in the audience as if they were the only one there. The passion she poured into her performance, the way she moved with every beat, the way her voice soared through the stadium—it was truly and utterly captivating.
Smoke erupted from hidden vents, and strobe lights flickered through the air as the platform started to lower again. the music filtering the air.
“I loved you, and I still do. Just wanted passion from you, just wanted what I gave you…”
Billie’s voice reverberated through the room, and as she sang, her gaze swept over the crowd. She looked at faces, at outstretched hands, until—suddenly—her eyes landed on you. Everything around you seemed to freeze. Her lips parted, a flash of recognition sparking in her eyes. And then she moved.
In one swift motion, she had jumped down from the stage and was running toward the crowd. People screamed, confusion rippling through them as they watched her dash forward, seemingly abandoning her performance. But she didn’t care. She didn’t stop. And each second felt it dragged on forever, every breath sticking in your throat until she finally reached you.
Flashes of red and blue seared through the smoke as she collided into you. Her arms wrapped around you so tightly it was like she was afraid you’d disappear if she let go. She buried her face in your neck, and you could feel her body trembling against yours, hearing the soft, choked sobs that escaped her lips. Her grip was fierce, almost painful, like a child clinging to their favorite doll at the park, afraid someone would take it away.
“Hi, baby. oh my god hi, my love.” you whispered softly into her ear, cradling the back of her head and rubbing soothing circles down her spine.
“I know, it’s okay i’ve got you..” You could feel eyes on you, phones pointing, trying to capture this intimate moment between their idol and her lover. But right now, it didn’t matter. In this small, fragile bubble, it was just the two of you.
She pulled back slightly, leaning her forehead against yours. Her hands caressed your cheeks, thumbs brushing away tears you didn’t realize were falling. She stared at you like she couldn’t believe you were real, eyes wide and glossy. Before you could say anything more, she leaned in, capturing your lips in a kiss that tasted like salt and honey—tears mixing together a bittersweet reunion.
The kiss was a breathless, desperate collision of emotions. Her lips were soft but urgent, fierce but tender, carrying the weight of every “I miss you” and “I’m sorry” neither of you had the chance to say. She kissed you like she was memorizing everything about you—the way you felt, the way you tasted, the very essence of you that she’d missed so much.
She deepened the kiss, and it was like two waves crashing together, a powerful force that left you both breathless and wanting more. Her hands got lost in your hair as she tried to pull you closer, as if she couldn’t get enough. But even as you strained against each other, the metal gate between you felt like a cruel reminder of the distance that had kept you apart.
The crowd around you screamed at the scene, their excitement transforming into frantic movements that jostled you both, forcing you to pull away. You stayed close, though, foreheads pressed together, breaths mingling in the small space between.
The crowd roared in excitement, the energy around you reaching a fever pitch. The intensity of their reactions pushed you, jostling you both until you had to pull away. Foreheads still touching as your breaths mingled in the small space between, eyes locked and smiles wide.
“Sorry for stopping the show, guys,” she said, voice crackling through the mic. She glanced back at you, eyes still glowing with joy and relief. “But, you know, my girlfriend’s here…” She turned back to the crowd, a sheepish smile tugging at her lips. “Oh, and if anyone has that video, please send it to me.”
The crowd erupted in cheers and laughter, awe and admiration radiating off them in waves.
“Why didn’t you tell me you were coming?” she asked softly, her fingers brushing a lock of hair behind your ear.
“I didn’t know I was till I got here. It was a last-minute thing.”
Her gaze traced every inch of your face, memorizing the way your hair was slightly disheveled, the way your eyes shone with nothing but love and admiration for her. She looked at you like you were the only person in the world, like she wanted to capture this moment and keep it safe forever. You looked at her the same way—seeing her not as the girl on stage, but just as her, the girl you loved more than anything.
“I’m so glad you’re here, mama. You have no idea.” she breathed, thumb swiping gently across your lower lip.
She closed the space between you again, this kiss softer but no less meaningful, more sacred than the last. This kiss was slower, softer, filled with a tenderness that made your heart ache. It wasn’t just a kiss—it was a promise, a vow whispered in a language only the two of you understood.
It was a dance of emotions, each touch speaking volumes. A conversation without words. A yearning poem written in the press of lips and the brush of tongues.
The air around you crackled with electricity, thick with unspoken words and feelings. This kiss, this moment, was everything you needed to remind you that no matter how much time and space separated you, this bond, this love, this electric, soul-deep connection, was the golden thread that would always stitch you back together.
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authors note: I wrote this at like 1 am after seeing a video of her performing the greatest at her first show and finished it this morning, i’m so tired😭.
i wish i could go to a show so bad but not this round unfortunately 😓. ngl i wanna write in french more.
remember to take care of yourself, stay hydrated, and stay safe. love and light🫶🏾- vay
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paiges-1vur · 4 months ago
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pt. 1. | from across the crowd.. as always, enjoy loves <3 *prologue posted* 🏀⚡️🪩
“what.. you guys, why are you all looking at me like that!” my words led to only more strange looks. my friends all sat around me, mouths open. “tiff. oh my gosh. are you joking!” my friends all start bombarding me with insults and “i can’t believe you’s”
i seriously had no clue this girl even existed until my friends had shown me her.. ten minutes before the game started. while i didn’t even know of her existence, my friends seemed to know her whole life story.
“okay guys but should i put it on?” i ask the group around me. i mean, i was genuinely cold. i had goosebumps forming on my arms and legs from how cold it was in the stadium. i should have noticed something was off when i left my apartment and nobody else was in going out clothes.
my closest friend madisen, who also seemed to know the most about paige encouraged me to put it on. “she wouldn’t have given it to you if she didn’t want you to wear it.. right?” she says shrugging. i slowly pull the hoodie over my head, immediately feeling warmed up.
the hoodie says uconn basketball on it, and has paiges number and last name on it. im immediately flooded by her scent. she smells… really good. like a mix of musk, wood, and smoke. as the rest of the game plays out all i can think about is the fact that i’m wearing her hoodie. i didn’t want the moment to ever end. but it unfortunately did when the buzzer sounded and Uconn was announced the winner.
me and my friends decided to stick around after the game for a little while. they got up to throw out our trash, and empty drink cans while i tried to find paige. i wanted to thank her for lending me her hoodie. its the least i could have done.
as i get up to search for paige, i see her walk out of the locker room.. and walking up to me. she was smiling, standing in front of me, practically towering over me. to be fair, i am 4’11 but that is only due to terrible genetics, and a very short mother. “hey” is all she says, but its enough to make my heart beat faster.
“hey, your name is… paige right?” i say to her smiling innocently, pausing before saying her name, not sure if i had remembered it totally correctly. honestly i could forget my own name right now if she asked me for it. she laughs slightly before responding, “yea thats my name, you remember me?”
I try to play it cool. “well my friends wouldnt shut up about you the whole game” i say laughing. “i didnt even know who you were before i got here.. well they dragged me here, and then almost killed me when i didnt know who you were. long story” i say, trying to explain the crazy night i’ve had. she laughed harder than me, surprised at my confession. “oh.. so you’re telling me you just showed up here, not even knowing who i was?”
im slightly embarrassed, and i hope its not showing on my cheeks. “well.. I’ve never been a fan of basketball, so my friends knew i wouldnt come to the game. they told me we were going out to the bars tonight, and dragged me here. that’s why i was wearing such a… revealing outfit before you gave me your hoodie. bad outfit planning on my part. and yea to be honest i had never heard of you in my life” I try to explain clearly, but I’m not even sure if i believe this all happened in one night.
“oh, wow so you really had no idea who i was?” she sounds almost surprised at this fact. “no.. not really, why?” I say, a slight bit confused. i wonder if i should have known her.
“oh, here’s your hoodie, by the way” i say, pulling it off and folding it into my hands. im now left in ny old outfit. my jean mini skirt and Uconn tank top leave quite frankly, little to the imagination. im not very proud of how i look in this moment, but the least i can do is give paige her hoodie back. “nah, don’t worry about it you can keep it. you look..” her eyes roam my body quickly, “cold anyway. and it looks better on you than me.” i smile at her and slip it back on. the hoodie reaches my mid thigh, its so oversized. “thank you so much- again im so sorry i didn’t know the stadiums were so.. cold oh my gosh.” i say laughing.
she laughs too, looking down at me and smiling. she bites her lip, like shes thinking hard about something before she speaks again. “can i, ask you a question?” im suddenly intrigued why paige bueckers would want to ask me a question but i bite. “yea sure, go ahead.” i say smiling at her, awaiting her next words.
“you probably have a boyfriend.. right?”
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carussadiane · 4 months ago
Text
easy to love
SARUKA HAKURA. 1,9k word count. fluff, it's full of sweet and fluffiness. self-indulgent.
Summary: he's the embodiment of love, while you have the lightest tounge in the world
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All of his life, Sakura only knows one path, and that is the thin line in front of his eyes. The tightrope looks fragile, easily snapped under an overwhelming weight. One wrong move, his life will end in a blink of an eye. 
His breathing is heavy everytime he exhales. His hands are shaking while steadily keeping all his weight balance on the tightrope. It’s the only path he has, so complaining was a waste of time. He has to prove his value in other ways. 
That’s why he moved to Makochi, transferred to Furin High School to show his value is much greater than everyone thought. His existence is much more than just a bi-colored freak or a troublemaker. The strongest–he could prove his life in that city, to show his life has much more meaning than all those little things that people have thrown to his head. Sakura will bring himself to the top.
That environment fits him. He’s the trashiest person in his hometown, that boring place full of ignorant people didn’t move him. Furin was the greatest decision he ever made.
Well, that was the first plan before he saw the reality was much different than his expectation. 
In just a few weeks, everything changed. His fist has reason whenever he raises them. All violence he ever thow now has a purpose–to protect the city, the school, his friends. Sakura would never have thought he found his place after all the harshness and scorn he has to face before. It feels so warmth, comforting. Does he deserve all of this? 
Suo and Nirei always take him somewhere on their day off. Sometimes, they come to the rooftop, meeting Umemiya and other senpais. Umemiya never takes off his chance to show off his vegetable garden, and keeps saying it will be fun if Bofurin members could do a barbeque party someday. The delicious omurice in Cafe Pothos that Kotoha always cooked whenever he came to visit. His classmates, other Bofurin members, and the townsfolk too. Why is it so easy for them to show kindness to someone like him?
Those thoughts slowly eat his mind. Scared. Sakura is not a stranger to that feeling, but he never knew that dreadful feelings could swallow the happiness he felt with just one gulp. It’s scary. He can feel his hand shaking abruptly, chest heavy like there was someone pounded his body with a heavy boulder. It’s uncomfortable.
How can affection turn into something so… suffocating?
How can…
“Huh, Sakura-san? What are you doing out here late at night?”
A soft familiar voice cut through his train of thought, like a wind bell chiming in the summer, clear and ringing through the whole house. 
His head never turned around that fast, except in a fight, just to see who that voice belonged to. There you are standing with a bewildered face, holding your guitar case strap a little tighter before running quickly towards Sakura, who is still standing with a shocked face. Both of you have the same thought; didn’t expect to cross each other late at night.
“Huh–?! Speak for yourself!” He shouts, offended.
“Well yeah, but I’m not the one with my head in the cloud,” you shrugs lightly. “Are you having a little night stroll? Can I join?”
“No, go home! You just finished your gig, right? You���re gonna get into weird shit if you keep hanging out at night.”
Sakura frowns goes deeper when your smile grows fonder. Little giggles falling out between your lips. “I didn’t know you can be a worrywart too!”
An air chokes up from his chest. “What?! It just pisses me off some small fry making a ruckus at night like some rat!” He can feel his face heating up. “And you’re gonna drag me into this if that happens!”
“To be fair, you’re the one who dragged yourself that day, Sakura-san,” you snicker, “Just admit it, you care about me.”
Sound of crickets can be heard in the distance, filling the empty streets. Wind blows lightly towards their way, making the wind chime through the night, and sweeps out a few strands of your hair until its covers your sight.
You want to laugh out the embarrassment because the stupid wind couldn’t read your cue. Maybe Sakura has a different perspective, but you try to build a calm yet friendly persona to your new-found crush, covering up your loser side so you wouldn’t shame yourself someday. It seems nature has other plans, even though it’s just a small gush of wind. Curse you, wind.
Red bruises catch your eyes. When you want to reach out to look at it clearly, Sakura pulls his hand out of your sight, making you caught off guard. 
Sakura looks much more surprise than you, like a deer saw his mother getting shot in front of him. “Stop it!”
“But your hand–did you just get caught in a fight?” There is no single doubt Sakura could handle a few guys and bruises in his skin, but that doesn’t stop you from worrying about his state. “Let’s get you patch up first. The place I work still open this–”
“Worry about yourself,” he snarls, wary filling his gaze. Even so, you catch a different spark passing by in his eyes, is it anxiety? “This is normal after beating people up. It’ll probably heal tomorrow morning.”
Sakura turns around to see your hand holding onto the back of his jacket. You purse your lips before opening them up again, but no words fall out.
He wants to pull his jacket back then run back to his house, ignoring whatever silent plea you want to let out. Yet, he can’t. Sakura just stands there, couldn’t bring himself to run or ignore you, and holds his gaze to your fidgety hands.
“It hurts, right?” You smile, brows scrunch slightly. “Let’s treat it before you get infected. Okay?”
And, he can’t bring himself to reject when your hand gently takes his, pulling him towards the lit up building.
Cozy interior greets his eyes when you swing the door open. The cafe you work with has different aesthetics compared to Cafe Porthos because of karaoke settings and live music corner is the main entertainment in that place, but it has the same homey vibes for anyone who wants to spend their time, even though you came here alone without any company.
You lightly push Sakura to sit in front of the counter, while you’re heading back to ask your manager where the first-aid box is. Sakura scoffs when you reassure him you’ll be back before he knows it, like he was a kid that didn’t have enough patience to wait for 5 minutes.
This is not his first time visiting your workplace. The first time, well, he was getting dragged by you with reason as a form of gratitude. You were persistent, not accepting any answers except “yes” or “fine, i’ll come along”, and that attitude still stays in your smile. Content in every soft word you say.
“I’m back!” Sakura flinches from your booming voice, like there was no one else except both of you in the spacious room. You laugh softly seeing his reaction. “Sorry for startling you. Now, shall we get started? Clench your hand, please, but not too firm. Got it?”
“You’re treating me like a child,” Sakura scoffs, but he pulls out both of his knuckles to your gaze obediently, showing the reddish bruises from punching people in the gut. Heat slowly creeping up to his cheeks, feeling the softness of your hand brush his skin while you’re dapping the red medicine full of care.
The burning from red medicine makes him hisses through the pain. You notice how Sakura quirks his brows, grip the chair he sits to ground himself from running away. Physical touch with no malice or brutality is foreign to his skin, but you smile fondly as the blush exposes more clearly in his pale skin. Maybe you can call this a development.
“Open your hand?” you grip his wrist before letting go to wrap the bandages around his hands. It’s for formality, but you’re scared the medicine effect wears off faster if exposed too long with the wind.
Sakura knows all people in the town are weirdos, but you’re much more weird. What kind of a person who drags a stranger to watch their gig as a form of gratitude? You’re the only one who’s capable of doing that, and Sakura was the victim of your blatant words that day. Well, he got weird food while watching how you sing accompanied by slow music.
After that, you’re acting buddy-buddy around him. Greeting him good morning while you pass by with your friends. Offering him bread you just bought from the local bakery. He really can’t forget when you tell him everyday stories like he’s your close friend. You’re friendly, kind, and it’s suffocating to be around you. Does it feel like a waste to be spending time with him? He can’t give you the same energy.
“Why are you so kind to me?” That question rolls slowly from his tongue. He can feel the weight of your gaze burning, hurting him. “Not just you, other folks too.”
You hum softly. “Is it weird?”
“Of course it is! I’m a newcomer in this city, and just happened to help you guys because I hate seeing a weak ass not knowing his place.”
“Do you think you’re hard to love, Sakura-san?” No reply came. You peek from your lashes, see how dumbfound Sakura is from your words.  
You huff out, a small smile appears in your lips before continuing bandaging his palm. “To me, it’s like lifting a finger. You’re pure and kind-hearted, even though you didn’t realize that, but everyone around you does. Yeah, you have a very harsh way of saying things, but I kinda understand where that habit came from.”
He’s been alone for his whole life then affection starts to feel foreign. Caring started to feel like a luxury he couldn’t afford even with money. Kindness was a trap in his eyes. You understand his wariness and confusion to accept the townsfolk thank you gifts, but it’s sad to see that Sakura thinks he’s unloveable.
“It’s so easy to love you,” you declare, “Like breathing or drinking or walking. It's like an everyday routine. They just didn't know you close enough, that you're much precious that you can't ever imagine.”
“W–What?! Stop spewing nonsense like that!” Sakura raises his forearm to shield his blushing face from your peering eyes. It’s a mocking lie. Everyone leaves him alone in the dark, so he has to fight his way to find a place–just for him to show his value. There’s nothing worth to like from him. And yet…
How can someone like you–so easy to laugh without a single care in the world, giving kindness with no heavy weight in your arms, and look at him full of love and care–declare something like that? You already see him beating someone up with no care from his bloody nose and aching gut. It’s painful. It’s unbearable. But you still bandage his hand full of concentration, hold his hand to give some of your warmth.
He doesn’t deserve this.
“It’s not nonsense.”
He doesn’t deserve you.
Affection spilling from your eyes, while your smile never falters from the first day you met. “I never feel this light before I met you, Sakura-san,” you chime, “I wish you could see yourself the way I see you.”
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