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mourn-and-watch · 8 months

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no but essek's abnormal behaviours in the last arc and especially in episode 140 are my roman empire. which is ironic because aeor is something of a roman empire itself. but in all seriousness, it was the episode that made me realise i love essek and his development so much and it kinda summarised it even before caleb's epilogue.

and i mean the "it's not fair" scene specifically. it's like, an epitome of his whole character progression from a person who put An Objectively Important Goal above all else without hesitation to someone who can't help but care for people around even more than his goal, no matter how big and relevant it is.

the mighty nein - and he alongside them - pretty much saved the world and freed an ancient city from thousand-year-long suffering. they defeated nine extremely powerful menacing entities who managed to stay out of everyone's sight for years and were so close to achieving their goal and dooming exandria in the process. they did the impossible and became heroes and somehow, they survived, even though they had bidden farewells a couple of hours ago because they had already understood what they had been facing. and nevertheless. they made it.

and none of them was celebrating.

mighty nein are basically essek's only friends. he knew them to be very unusual people, to put it lightly, loud and stubborn and completely inescapable once they consider you to be one of their own. and they showed him so much kindness and put so much faith in him, they were here playing the most atrocious music ever and digging clay in his backyard for a spell they invented just to help one of theirs and asking him if he could bring them pastries the day after they found out he was lying to them and had started a war. they were chaotic and weird and sometimes unbearable but most importantly they were carrying so much hope with them all this time - a hope they could end the war, a hope they could stop the angel of irons cult, a hope they could get better, a hope he could get better, and now, finally, that they could save their lost friend.

and that hope shattered, just like that, the moments after they'd already made the impossible. they saved so many souls - and then could not get back just that one.

for essek "my intentions were never good they were important" thelyss it just. shouldn't have mattered. they won. it could have been worse. people die and when they die they rarely come back. they should've been happy everyone else barely made it alive.

but for some reason, mighty nein being so defeated after they saved the world exposed him to that overwhelming feeling of injustice and unfairness. and i mean, there were many things essek considered to be unfair, but when i watched his first appearance and his interactions with mighty nein later on til their reunion in aeor arc, i wouldn't dare to guess that one of the things on that list would be something that personal. and personal not even to him.

the thing is, essek didn't even know who that guy was. why mighty nein cared about him so much. he had an idea, i guess, that he was their friend once, or someone in that body was. it was also a person who wanted to unleash a terrifying horrific aberration onto the material plane. it was a person very dedicated to killing essek and his friends - and they still didn't take any pleasure in fighting him. essek didn't feel strongly about lucien or molly, because he never knew them.

i don't think he mourned his death and failed resurrection. he mourned mighty nein's hope, the one they put in him when they had no reason to, the one they offered yasha in the cathedral and the one they kept after the spell for veth failed and the one they carried til the very end because they wanted it to reach molly. they had saved people with this hope. they had saved nations. they had saved the world. but they ended up feeling like it hadn't even been worth anything.

how desperate would it feel, witnessing people who for some reason always saw good in you when they absolutely shouldn't, who made literal miracles out of nothing, who ended wars and fought gods and tricked the hags and freed cities from horrors beyond anyone's comprehension purely because they thought it was the right thing to do and also loved their friends this much, silently crying over a dead body they couldn't bring back to life? how desperate would it feel to realise that with all your knowledge about time you dedicated your life to and threw away any principles for, you can't undo this? no one can. some things are left to fate alone and this time it wasn't kind to them. no matter how much good they did, they still got slapped in the face.

and it was, i think, such a genuine moment of empathy. like, essek is the character who prefers to put up a facade and act distant and self-composed but this time he just. walked away unable to watch this. the could only say to fjord that it wasn't fair. even when he was caught off guard in nicodranas he was able to explain himself and his motives to an extent even though he was a nervous wreck whose extra important plan went to hell the second the only people he cared about appeared. this time he had nothing to elaborate on. it just wasn't fair. it wasn't fair his friends didn't get what they wanted the most. it wasn't fair he couldn't do anything to make it right.

it is such a sad and beautiful and even cathartic scene because it is about person who started a war that destroyed so many lives - and then met this ragtag group of weirdos who saw a lonely stand-offish guy and said "hey, let's be friends!" and didn't even wait for him to answer. he saw them being serious and calculated and he saw them being ridiculous and extremely stupid, he saw their mistrust to outsiders and their loyalty to each other, he made spells with them and paid a visit to their hot tub, he ate their stale pastries and drank their hot chocolate mixed with whiskey, he was welcomed amongst them and in their wonderful home, both in xhorhas before they even found out what he had done and in the tower when they already knew - and then, he saw them mourning their loss, defeated and helpless, and he, a person who believed there were things more important than whole nations, let alone just one life, couldn't help but share the pain they felt. a pure display of compassion from someone who detached himself from it, who didn't believe he could grow into a better person capable of it again, but became one nonetheless without even realising it

#sorry. i cannot shut up about this. this scene stuck with me the moment i saw it and i just couldn't get it out of my head #i mean. i liked essek well enough. i just got attached to other characters more. but then 'it's not fair' happened and it sealed the deal #it was just. so beautiful. so sincere. so important for a character who just started to learn how to care about people #his reaction wasn't intentional. it didn't change anything. but it showed how humane he had become. how deeply he cared #mighty nein are no joke pal #they're gonna make you feel all these unknown emotions like sympathy and love and affection even when they're incredibly painful #essek experiencing closeness and attachment in all their forms. as something beautiful and something aching. is so important to me #they saved him because they had good hearts! and these good hearts sparked so much joy around them!#but if a good heart grants you an ability to experience joy so profoundly. it makes everything else feel like that #you get it. i hope you get it. anyway e140 did so much psychic damage on me i probably will never recover #in a good way mostly <3 but yeah. yeah. it makes me feel a little insane #the mighty nein #essek thelyss #critical role

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sepublic · 10 months

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In lieu of my latest reblog about people taking compelling characters and projecting their writing onto some other (usually white) dude, I want to bring up a post I had drafted all the way back from April, but never posted because at the time I still had enough patience not to. But now is different. I do think this analysis is a bit outdated because it doesn’t consider the mediocre white dude angle of Belos that I find paramount, but it’s good enough for my repurposed point.

I find it funny when some people complain that the narrative was unfair to Belos despite his “trauma” and circumstances, like there aren’t multiple characters out there who parallel his issues, and get sympathy AND a redemption, in all but one case! Belos is narratively condemned not for what he has in common with others, but for what sets him apart, particularly his stubborn ego. Cases in point;

“Belos deserved to have sympathy for having an unhealthy attachment to his more confident sibling that was mixed with resentment over being abandoned for someone else, culminating in guilt over hurting them and regretting it!”

Lilith exists. She’s motivated by a massive inferiority complex with Eda, Gwen favors her. She’s clearly salty about Eda going off to have fun with Raine, and claims to Luz that she’s Eda’s ‘real’ family. She cursed her sister and felt enormous guilt over it… But in the end, Lilith IS given sympathy by the narrative, and the chance to redeem herself. And she takes just that.

A lot of the people claiming Belos deserved better theorize that stabbing Caleb was an accident, and you know what? So was the permanence of Eda’s curse, Lilith expected it to only last a day and certainly not transform her sister. But Lilith still owned up. And she learned to make other friends while respecting Eda’s boundaries.

“Belos was an orphan raised in a culture that encouraged genocide and a hatred of wild magic!”

Caleb exists, he went through the exact same childhood as Philip, but still chose to change. And while they weren’t orphans at the time, Hunter and the Collector were also raised on genocide, taught to find wild/Titan magic apprehensive. But they loved it instead.

“But Belos actually lost his brother, his loved one died!”

So did Hunter’s! And he was shown to be snappy and aggressive, pouring himself into a mission to cope! But he still owned up, apologized to Willow for rebuking her. He lost Flapjack, and instead of making replicas of his lost loved one to keep to himself, discarding anyone that wasn’t close enough, Hunter made a diverse array of palismen for other kids, to give them the loving relationship he lost! Even his own palisman was clearly carved to be different from Flapjack, reminiscent but still their own thing.

Then there’s Darius, who lost his mentor the previous Golden Guard; His own ‘Caleb’, so to speak! And he was also unpleasant about it, he took his grief out on Hunter, who had nothing to do with this! The canon audio diaries even confirm the apprehension has been going for a while… But Darius realized he was wrong to have projected onto Hunter, made up for this by practically adopting the kid and giving this kid the happy ending his mentor didn’t have; Passing the cycle of kindness the Golden Guard started. And his own grief is pointed out to the audience by Hunter himself.

“They should’ve shown how having a hero complex and a desire to live out a fantasy can corrupt anyone!”

Luz and the Collector. Luz herself makes these comparisons for Belos, and there were times where she hurt her friends trying to live out her fantasy, and/or planned to leave them under the impression she was doing the ‘right thing’. Luz makes a legitimate consideration that she could’ve been Belos, if she refused to listen to others and change. But Luz owned up! As did the Collector, whose escapism and wish to play the role of the ‘hero’, in this case Luz, causes them to do some pretty terrible things. But they still change after being called out, and are still given sympathy over the loneliness and trauma that fueled their escapism, as was Luz.

"Philip struggled with getting over a different type of fantasy, one that relied upon him conquering and hurting others!"

As did King! And King got over that, he quickly learned that other people would always be more important than his fantasies, even if the 'sacrifices' were a lot more minor. King started off the same, the difference is that he still grew up and that's why we judge his antics as so much more light-hearted.

“Well that’s not fair, Philip’s examples were more extreme!”

How about Eda’s curse? Belos never brings up his other sources of trauma as an excuse for his actions, but you know what he does invoke? His curse, claiming to Hunter and Luz that it forced him to act certain ways. But we see Eda, who got a rawer deal with her curse; She didn’t bring it upon herself, as Belos did. She legitimately loses control when it takes over. She scarred and disabled her father because of it, and you know what?

Eda never uses her curse as an excuse. She never lets that justify what she’s done to people, and she even befriends the creature at the source of her curse, the Owl Beast. The curse she deals with is objectively worse, objectively more unfair, than Belos’. But it’s only Belos who actually cites his curse as an excuse, and the palismen at the source of it? He kills them.

“Belos’ cursed form is treated as ugly and evil!”

The palismen amalgam in his mind looked almost exactly the same, to the point where Hunter, who had seen Belos’ cursed form in person before, thought they were identical. But in the end, the palismen amalgam, despite resembling Belos’ cursed form, is a sympathetic and tragic victim who is murdered. Luz and Hunter mistaking him for Belos is justified, but it’s also still regrettable that they are judged by appearances.

“It hurts people to sacrifice their morals for the greater good, you know!”

Raine did that, they felt compelled to drag Darius and Eberwolf (one of whom was a childhood friend) into a murder-suicide, because as far as they knew, they were already going to be caught and executed, so may as well take their oppressors down with them! And they aren’t called out for it, because they couldn’t have known about Darius’ actual intentions…

Because in the end, sometimes you have to punch a fascist, and sometimes you have to oppose a friend or loved one because they took the fascists’ side. It’s why Lilith is expected to change for Eda, not the other way around. Raine is not the aggressor here, it’s all from the principle of self-defense for themselves and the isles as a whole.

And in the end, it’s because Raine is approaching from a place of actual good intent and moral concern that there are lines they still refuse to cross; As soon as they learn about Luz and King, they sabotage their own plans because they refuse to orphan these kids they just found out about for the ‘greater good’. When one of those very kids, Luz, makes Raine promise to keep Eda safe, you can see the conflict between their morals and their obligations in their eyes as Eda accepts the Bard sigil, and ultimately Raine powers through the draining spell to save Eda’s life, simply because Luz asked them to.

I’ve talked since their debut of how Raine has some similarities to Belos, in particular how they both work their whole lives to infiltrate a group from within to topple it, even as they publicly support it as a celebrated leader. They both had to lie and work under the radar, and make effective rhetoric; They each wear their own masks. Raine has to constantly lie to and rebuke Eda about being brainwashed, and we can see the moral agony it gives them!

But Raine is opposed to a legitimate threat, whereas Belos is completely making one up; Raine has to work under the micro-management of tyrants with control over them, Philip has been free from his colony for centuries, and even after finding out Gravesfield gave up on its witch hunting mission in the present, still traps himself of his own will. Belos feels no guilt for any of his ‘necessary evil’.

Raine had actual morals unlike Belos that they did sacrifice, for an actual greater good, and they actually hurt over these choices. They dedicated their whole life to stop a dark and twisted parallel, which makes their inclusion in the finale as the only person outside of the core trio to help against Belos all the more deserved; They even help deliver the killing blows. And Raine is rewarded for all of their effort, allowed to see it come to fruition and rest happily afterwards, because they really were sincere, and actually did make sacrifices, something Belos preaches but never follows. Most importantly, Raine knew they couldn’t justify everything even for their morally-justified mission.

“Belos was still legitimately wronged by Caleb for nothing, he didn’t deserve to be abandoned!”

Even if we believe Caleb did ‘abandon’ Philip or whatever; The Collector was legitimately wronged by the Titan, imprisoned and isolated for millennia despite being innocent. But while he justifiably calls the Titan a bully, he never takes this out on King, or any other Titan for that matter, remembering the rest with love. Nor is the Collector expected to forgive the Titan; The Titan accepts she made the wrong call. After all, imprisoning the Collector left them in a vulnerable state to be exploited by Belos, and give him the draining spell…

The Titan and Caleb’s mistakes were very much that, but the Collector matured for others, without needing an apology from the dead person who wronged him. And based on what we see of Belos’ memories, Caleb probably DID get to deliver that apology when he was alive, and Philip still insisted on being bitter!

“His only childhood friend just ditched him for someone else!”

That’s what happened to Willow, and that’s how she understood it for most of her life; Amity leaving her behind because she was too weak, and kids like Boscha and Skara were more popular, stronger, etc. But not only does the show say her rage against Amity is totally warranted and that the onus is on Amity to apologize, even if she didn’t choose to leave Willow (keep in mind she still saw Willow as a weak person to protect without input, as we later see in Labyrinth Runners)…

Willow is still kind. She still opts to be compassionate to Gus, and to Luz, and in general a nurturing person despite her abandonment. And when Willow is given the chance to take revenge on Boscha by stealing her glory in Grudgby, she doesn’t kick the girl while she’s down to do so; But Willow is also allowed to still hold anger towards Boscha, as we see in Season 3. And assuming Caleb wasn’t malicious about leaving Philip behind, we clearly see how he welcomes his brother back and wants things to get better, just as Amity does; He had his own side of the story. And Willow doesn’t kill Amity despite being primed to very easily do so…

"But imagine finding out they CHOSE to leave you, when you thought they didn't!"

Camila?!?! In fact, Camila was THE precedent for this, and people went and applied her tragic scene to Philip to make HIM into some angsty sadboi! And last I checked, Camila didn't exactly murder Luz... Plus, Philip had infinitely more time to see Caleb and Evelyn interact, and thus figure out that Caleb wasn't being kidnapped or brainwashed; Compare that to Camila who is just dunked into that situation out of nowhere, and is barely even adjusting to Vee's existence on top of finding out Luz was someplace else the entire time, and dealing with Jacob.

"A lot of family members at least start off as well-intentioned when hurting loved ones, they could've shown that!"

Bold of you to assume that Belos' selfish entitlement towards Caleb is the same as Camila or Gwen's legitimate concerns for their daughters; They did unconditionally love and they were misguided. But when shown they were causing pain, they actually shifted gears instead of focusing on how they were fight because they knew better. And what they were doing WAS still harmful, even though they DID care.

“Belos was probably a weirdo himself, and suffered from internalized hatred for his deviancy!”

Lilith dyed her hair to fit in with the coven, and be taken seriously. Amity suppressed herself to be a stoic perfectionist, constantly trying to justify her own existence as she says; She had to work to be good at magic while others like Gus, Emira, and Edric were naturally talented, and was made to hate those who weren’t successful as witches. Hunter too loathed his own lack of bile magic!

Most tellingly, Camila herself was taught to hide her weirdness, grew up thinking she was successful for doing that, and even tried to impose the same on Luz because of that misconception! But Camila realized what was done to her was wrong, and the same applied to her daughter; Accepting Luz’s weirdness meant accepting her own.

“Even if he still chose to double down in villainy, Belos could’ve at least been given a moment where he was sympathetic, where his sadness was shown, before nevertheless deciding his fate!”

Kikimora had an entire episode where she agonized over her obligations to a mother that seemed low key abusive, given her threat to disown her. We see her hesitate, cry, and be legitimately disappointed when she’s rewarded for staying with Belos by ‘getting to live’, a reward that doesn’t even last by the Day of Unity! Even after Kikimora makes her choice to betray Luz and Amity, we still get a final scene of her looking uncertain and even regretful of her decision, before she commits. Kikimora isn’t redeemed but is still humanized, despite being less human than Belos, so to speak.

She’s even a dark parallel to Lilith, having jealousy towards the Golden Guard, an emotionally abusive mother, and an inferiority complex towards other members of the coven despite working directly with Belos! And she is given many chances to escape Belos, a few months where she is legitimately free from him, and chooses to remain in her ways because Kikimora’s difference with Lilith isn’t that life was more unfair to her, it’s that she refused to change.

Now this is a bit out there, but there’s also the other Coven Heads! Mason, Vitimir, Hettie, and Osran! The show was shortened, so who knows what they could’ve provided for the story… Mason, Hettie, and Osran especially, since they’re not included amongst the coven head loyalists who still cling to power, even after Belos’ death. The show could’ve easily set up sympathetic moments to indicate a possibility of change, paying off in the epilogue; But because of Disney, you can’t blame the writers for not delivering everything they could’ve.

“How about a character who was just… an asshole, no outside reason given?”

Boscha, who was popular and privileged. While she does allude to some pressures that motivate her, as far as we know, there wasn’t really anyone or anything that made her be so cruel towards those she perceives as lesser. But despite this, Willow doesn’t see any point in trying to take Boscha’s spotlight as a Grudgby captain, when offered by her teammates; She doesn’t kick Boscha when she’s down. And Boscha is ultimately still recognized as unhappy with the loss of her friends, so even if she does do egregious things during the Collector’s reign, Amity offers Boscha the chance to become better and improve, as she did. And she takes it!

“Well, none of these characters had to grapple with having done things nearly as bad as Belos!”

And why do you think that is? Why are Belos’ sins so monumental in comparison, how did they get so bad? Because he kept refusing to change, kept refusing each opportunity, and got worse because of that. His first confirmed murder was Caleb, who right beforehand embraced his brother during what appeared to be a manifestation of the curse. But Philip still chose to commit his first sin despite receiving such unconditional sympathy, because he wanted control, not happiness. He didn’t start off as a genocidal dictator, he worked his way up to that over centuries.

“They make it seem like Belos was born evil!”

Our earliest chronological appearances of Philip are as a happy, carefree child who plays games with the brother he loves and looks up to; That isn’t the portrayal of someone ‘born’ evil. This is the portrayal of someone who became that way, over time, because he refused to concede anything to anyone, and wore away what decency he had across centuries, until we see the Emperor that Belos is when the show starts.

An evil dictator who ravaged an entire world for hundreds of years came from an innocent little kid, and Luz becomes self-aware of how this can apply to her, even as she’s reminded that she also ISN’T like Belos because of this critical reflection and willingness to listen. Belos, on the other hand, consciously cultivated an echo chamber for centuries, killing any Grimwalker he felt disagreed with him, despite their unconditional love and support. He deliberately shut himself off from the isles and ignored the kindness of others.

Bump reminds Faust that it’s disingenuous to project malice onto children who often simply don’t know any better, and just need to be given a chance to be taught and educated. But kids also have to take initiative to mature when they get older, hence why we hold adults more responsible; The established logic is that Belos wasn’t an evil child, he was simply a child who never grew up and that’s where his evil came from, rather than being some pre-existing source.

To be honest, I think the narrative doesn’t bother showing sympathy to Belos over his trauma because he’s already HAD more than enough sympathy, across centuries, from his brother, the Grimwalkers, his followers, even Luz and the Collector! So the story doesn’t feel the need to waste tears on someone who already got them, and instead focuses sympathy to characters who haven’t received as much, if any; People like Lilith, Amity, Hunter, etc.

Belos is the culmination of other characters’ traumas (who prove you can still choose to be better and happier despite these things), and was practically coddled by the people in his life for it. But he still chose to be bitter, never opened up to accept help, and his rejection brought even more pain that he could only blame on himself. Belos’ only tragedy is his refusal to change for the better; Even the narrative has made it clear he had chances, tears wept for him by people he knew.

He is a mirror to so many characters, what could’ve happened if they looked at their own pain and used it as justification to continue lashing out, because clearly they are the underdog heroes who have been wronged and are fighting against an injustice, right? The hero of their own story, if you will. Hell, we still also get that with Kikimora, as I just said! What I’ve listed is not a double standard, but rather proof that Belos was not uniquely condemned by his circumstances, for he is alike many characters as I mentioned. And Belos does not need to be portrayed “sympathetically” in order for the audience to understand the relevance of these parallels; Namely, that Belos has no excuse to still be like this when those similar nevertheless choose not to be cruel, and will accept others’ compassion.

And besides, with how the show was shortened… Who’s to say the writers didn’t plan to throw Belos a sympathetic moment of genuine loneliness, before doubling down? Not that they really would’ve needed to. But if they planned it, the writers had to leave it out to prioritize the weirdos this show is actually about, due to the shortening.

#the owl house #emperor belos #philip wittebane #lilith clawthorne #caleb wittebane #the owl house hunter #darius deamonne #Luz Noceda #the owl house collector #king clawthorne #Eda clawthorne #edalyn clawthorne #raine whispers #camila noceda #the owl house boscha #fandom salt #white favoritism

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waltwhitmansbeard · 1 month

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the way matt’s voice wavered/broke when keyleth said “and he is in *pain*” in the last episode fucking broke me… the anger and grief warring in that one word

the way matt embodies keyleth (and the rest of vox machina but especially keyleth) is a love language in and of itself

so something that i find very interesting about the way that matt plays his players' previous pcs is that i think he's the worst at getting marisha's characters' voices. i'm talking in a very practical sense, like i think his grog was spectacular and his pike and caleb and percy are all very good, but when he speaks as keyleth, he doesn't really sound like keyleth.

but.

he may not sound like her, but by god does he understand her. it is so clear to me that matt understands keyleth in a way that the obnoxious twitch chat from c1 never, ever could. i think the fandom has a tendency to babygirl keyleth, which is fair, bc she is babygirl, but matt knows her anger, her frustrations, her stubbornness, because he married them. he cherishes and uplifts those parts of keyleth bc those are the parts of his wife that she brought to that character, and he loves his wife. his keyleth, the voice acting is whatever, but the portrayal is first and foremost a love letter to a character his wife put her heart and soul into that got shit on for the better part of three years, and for that, i will always, always love him.

#ask #Anonymous #critical role

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wysteriaisapenguin · 5 months

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If I were to give the voices their own names

Harlow the Hero

“Contra” the Contrarian (Real name is a mystery~)

Simon the Smitten

Spencer the Skeptic

Caleb the Cold

Percival “Percy” the Paranoid

Bruno the Broken

Steven the Stubborn (Do not call him “Steve”)

Hunter the Hunted (It hates the irony of its name…)

Oswald the Opportunist

Chester “Ches” the Cheated (He prefers “Ches”)

And of course, Jonathan Crowe, the Narrator

#wysty's thoughts #wysty's headcanons #slay the princess #stp voices #stp narrator #nah his name is totally not based on someone we already know lol

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enchantedchocolatebars · 1 month

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Fic Request: Kid Philip is sick from the mold, so Caleb, Evelyn and her parents are taking care of him. Maybe add a moment of Kid Philip not wanting to take the medicine.

Common Mold Medicine

Summary: Kid Philip won't take his common mold medicine unless...

Ao3 version

Thank you for the help, @talisman975!

Enjoy!

"Little sips, Philip," Mrs. Clawthorne gently instructed the unwell boy as the mother held a straw to his lips.

He was currently dealing with a case of common mold while laying down on the guest room bed inside the Clawthorne household.

After sipping his water, he murmured a soft thank you when Mr. Clawthorne wiped his chin with the corner of his blanket.

After slipping a bowl of pre-cut flesh and blood fruit into Philip's hands, which the sugars in the sweet, exotic fruit would help his human immune system out, Evelyn changed the damp washcloth on his forehead.

Philip closed his eyes and snuggled into his blanket once his brother finished fluffing his pillow, and he felt the elder's hand gently pat his head.

"Don't worry, Philip," Caleb whispered with the softest of reassurance.

"I know things seem to be unpleasant now, but you're going to be okay. This illness is something you can overcome."

Everyone was making every effort to lower Philip's fever.

...

Philip turned his head away from the spoonful of cloudy brown-colored medicine being held to his lips.

"I don't want to take it," a stubborn and stuffy-nosed Philip pouted as he crossed his arms in defiance.

"It smells icky," he huffed.

"But, Philip, it's crucial that you take this," Mr. Clawthorne said calmly and carefully as he pulled the spoon back, not wanting to rile up the brunette.

"It will aid in your recovery," Mrs. Clawthorne tried to persuade with a sweet smile.

However, Philip frowned and shook his head.

"Caleb...," Evelyn whispered as she and her parents looked to the blonde in hopes that he could convince Philip to take his medicine.

"Oh, Philip, won't you please take your medicine?" Caleb asked with a small smile as he took a seat on the side of the bed, his tone lively.

At first, Philip wouldn't budge, but then Caleb proceeded to bring out the overly pleading puppy dog eyes.

"Pleaaaase? For me? For your big brwother?" he implored in a sticky-sweet voice, his eyes big and full of sparkles.

After some silence, Philip finally sighed.

"... Fine," he agreed with another huff, frowning about the fact that he had given in so easily as Caleb and the Clawthornes released breaths of relief and smiled at each other.

"But," he continued, developing a giant smirk on his face as he was about to make a deal, pointing a finger at everyone.

"You all have to take it with me."

Those certainly weren't words that Caleb, Evelyn, and Mr. and Mrs. Clawthorne were expecting to hear.

"But, Philip, we're not sick," Mr. Clawthorne gently stated with a tender yet visibly nervous smile, which only made Philip return to crossing his arms.

"I won't take that medicine unless everyone else takes it with me!" he declares assertively and adorably, causing everyone to sigh.

It looks like they didn't have a choice.

...

"... Mmm!" Philip hummed in delight as he sucked up and swallowed all of his medicine, removing his spoon from his mouth.

"Wow, that actually tasted really good!"

The medicine possessed both a sharp burst of tartness and a sweet, apple-like flavor.

"More, please!" Philip politely requested as he held his spoon out, smiling an innocent, closed-eyed smile at everyone with cheery, flushed cheeks.

Meanwhile, Caleb and the Clawthornes had extremely exaggerated puckered faces as a result of taking the medicine while healthy.

They appeared as though they had all sucked on the sourest lemon ever for a considerable amount of time.

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idoodlestuffsometimes · 8 months

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I initially wanted my take to be accompanied by a funny haha drawing, but I am too busy rn and the brainrot is too strong.

For a long time I tried to understand WHAT makes your version of Belos far scarier than he is in the show. It was so weird but it added to the angsty atmosphere perfectly, making the situation seem more hopeless.

But! Now I have a theory. (Little disclamer: I describe the reasoning through purely subjective lenses and how I came to understand the character from the original show.)

Your Belos is far scarier because he hadn't lost anything. Caleb is right there! Alive and "well". There is no buttons to push to trigger any emotional human response. Your Belos has no tragedy that would be painful enough to make him in any way irrational.

Even the grimwalkers are created with cold calculated reason in mind. They are not the irrational impulse to get his dead brother back. Philip just can't have any possible attachement to the blond boys. He doesn't see them as the extension of Caleb and therefore cant care less if they betray him or not. Pure manipulation of the tool.

Philip wasn't alone for 4 hundred years. He had the "fellow human" by his side the whole time. And that human is also the reason for the whole ordeal. So your Philip would care less about other humans, because he doesnt have this longing for the connection. Cross him? Bam! No mercy, even if you are human.

The same goes with his relation to the human realm. Your Belos wouldnt give a shit that the world has changed. Caleb is with him and that would is enough. Again, no buttons to push!

My mind is a mess, but I hope my points are understantable.

You think my boy is scarier than canon?

[IMAGE ID: Belos looking smug, saying, "You flatter me..." /End ID]

Ah! Meta discussion in my inbox! I LOVE getting to see how people react to the stuff I make and why. It's half the fun, honestly :) Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts.

For my own part, I would say the tragedy that makes him irrational is his prejudiced upbringing and his stubborn adherance to it no matter what. He was taught to never question or reconsider. The beliefs he absorbed are always, always right, and those who disagree are always wrong or misled or evil.

Even when it's a fellow human. Even when it's Caleb.

What compels me about writing my version of Belos is that he's a version of the character who wants to have his cake and eat it too. Caleb is alive. Caleb is "bewitched." In his beliefs, it would be kinder to kill him. To save his soul. To return him to God.

He doesn't. Perhaps he's more hopeful than he is in canon. Perhaps he's more selfish. Perhaps he just got lucky in a fight that was never intended to end in Caleb's death.

Either way, this is a version of Belos who refuses to take the quick and "merciful" way out. He wants to adhere to his beliefs and keep his brother at the same time, even when it means that Caleb must suffer.

#brother's keeper au #doodlereply #doodle art

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wallflowerwritesstuff · 1 month

Text

Memory Lane (i.)

After Caleb and Grandma's demise, you're left with more questions than answers.

Zayne finds himself in the same boat, questioning the past and whether fate or man has led you both to where you are now.

TW: Mentions of Illegal Experimentation/Blood/Injury, References to Large-Scale Tragedy (Chronoshift Catastrophe), Implications and Direct Reference to Death of Characters, Temporary Character Death (Past), Canon-Typical Violence in a Canon Divergent Timeline

dividers by tsunami-of-tears here on tumblr :)

He hadn’t wanted to go.

There wasn’t a bribe in the world strong enough to convince him back then to go to the center willingly, let alone spend his days there when he could be more productive elsewhere. Even as a teenager, Zayne had preferred structure to his day, his parents insisting this would still be structured, just…different. His parents seemed to have forgotten one important detail when attempting to convince him.

Zayne hadn’t ever been a fan of different.

And yet, for reasons outside his control, he’d ended up sitting in Ms. Josephine’s office away from prying eyes and hushed whispers, reading books he’d brought along and eventually, some of hers when he’d completed his own. It was a quiet time apart from hearing the faint footsteps of people walking in the hallway and the occasional beeping of machines. When it wasn’t, however, it was ear-piercing. Zayne remembered freezing up when screaming voices and loud banging were heard outside the door, listening and hoping the noises in the hallway didn’t devolve into something more serious.

He wouldn’t have been able to see it coming with how the shades were always closed in her office.

“It isn’t as bad as you’d think,” she had reassured after finding him glued to where he sat. Her gaze had been weary, deeply apologetic, and full of concern. “Being here, I mean. I question why I’m here, too, sometimes, but fate works mysteriously. Don’t you agree?”

‘No’ he’d thought at the time while gazing into his mug, the feeling remaining years later as Chief in the hospital where he’d met you for the first time officially.

Because you, in true Hunter fashion, had come crashing into his office with information that even Zayne hadn’t known about. Information that reframed much of the childhood he'd once regarded fondly apart from the usual missteps.

What he once believed had been coincidental and lucky now felt contrived and shrouded in doubt and skepticism. The lingering questions he’d always held close remained unanswered, only proceeding to spur on the theories swirling in his head.

Theories that he’d know would cause you undue pain, though you’d probably attempt to smile and insist it was better to know. You’d avoid his eyes if the time ever came for him to tell you his thoughts on your peculiar childhood, doing your best to put on a strong face until you were no doubt alone.

He wondered how often you’d cried with no one to support you, positive it was more times than you remembered. Not only because you often wept in your sleep, but because your memory has always seemingly been an ongoing issue.

And yet…

You hadn’t forgotten anything since Ms. Josephine had found you at one of the local shelters.

Your memory had been above average, almost photographic, in fact. Your ability to pick up on whatever you put your mind to after observing once was impressive. It was how you’d become such a reliable hunter despite your young age and unordinary heart.

He had made it known during your first check-up he hadn’t been thrilled about your career choice…but he also couldn’t help but feel proud of you after watching you nearly lose the light in your eyes as a child. You were thriving and had grown even more stubborn when talking about what you wished to achieve. This only provided more fuel to Zayne’s suspicions.

Despite what Ms. Josephine had insisted, memory loss had never been one of the conditions you'd suffered from.

It was a symptom.

A symptom that often only occurred in extreme cases such as childhood trauma and situations in which a person had—

Inhaling deeply, Zayne removed his glasses. He used his fingers to dig into his eyes in an attempt to ease the ache, though dry eyes still burned beneath closed lids.

He wouldn’t go further down that train of thought, knowing it was nearly impossible for it to be true. For one, you were still here. Still breathing, talking, laughing, worrying, and caring about him while not offering the same basic courtesy to yourself.

His inkling would never serve as definite proof that something had happened to you, meaning that pointing fingers and making baseless accusations would only send him backward rather than toward the answers he sought.

You know, by helping her, you help yourself.

The statement, to this day, confused him.

He wondered why she’d entrusted you to him when he'd partially failed already. He hadn’t kept contact with you, her, or Caleb after getting early entry into his program, though he’d never get a chance to ask about it now. He could only attempt to make up for the lost years by making sure you were safe, fed, and aware of the fact he’d support you wherever you went.

(it was working almost too well if every flutter of his heart whenever spending time with you meant anything.)

If he wanted, he could approach it as logically as he did everything else since you were now both adults—spare the feeling of helplessness that only grew as time began to trickle like water through trembling fists. But that would only confuse you, perhaps even make your impulsive nature grow tenfold like gasoline tossed into an open flame.

Zayne knew that the answer had to be somewhere, though. Perhaps he’d missed something back then, too carefree despite his attempts at remaining diligent and in control.

Leaning his head back, he shut his eyes, letting out a soft exhale and beginning to search. His memories had to be a step in the right direction, even if he’d vowed to leave the past where it belonged.

Because for you, the rules were worth breaking.

No matter the consequence.

Want more?

Follow the fic on my blog using #memorylanewithzayne or on ao3 for updates :)

Live, laugh, love (and deepspace) 🤭

-🌻

#love and deep space #lnds #l&ds #zayne love and deepspace #l&ds zayne #lads zayne #zayne x reader #love and deepspace zayne #lnds zayne #zayne lads #dr zayne #love and deepspace #memory lane with zayne

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