#innie bellybutton | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

jxtina-86 · 2 months ago

Text

Strong

There's a nursery to be built, promises to be made. Promises that I'll be damned if I break. RomanReigns/Alexia. See here for the rest of the series/order to read.

Warning: Language/Hints of smut

Rating: MA

Italics = flashback

Because we need each other We believe in one another I know we're going to uncover What's sleepin' in our soul Acquiesce, Oasis

I lean against the doorframe and watch as Lex slowly packs away the final pile of baby clothes. All that remains is the white chest of drawers and the boxes of furniture left to be assembled. The room still carries the air of fresh paint, despite the windows being flung open for the past few days. Three walls are now coated in a pale grey, the fourth covered in grey and white chevron wallpaper – the shade matched by Lex's expert eye and carefully applied by a professional, despite my own willingness to undertake the task myself. Although that was before I realised how difficult it would be to match each sheet to the next in order to keep the pattern in line.

I did win the task of painting though. Mainly because Lex had been banned from undertaking any such job by Dr Ash, who'd looked aghast at the suggestion that she'd be putting together the nursery together single-handedly in my absence. Turns out Pregnant Lex is feistier and more determined than ever.

“All the tools are here,” Lex turns to me, pointing at the box on the floor. “And please read the instructions before you put together the crib because I don't want to come back to find that half the screws are missing because you just guessed or something.”

“Would I do that?”

She raise an eyebrow. “You put up a shelf last week that fell down after twenty-four hours because you didn't follow the instructions.”

I push off the doorframe and step towards her, taking the bag of clothes from her hands and pulling her into my arms instead. “I promise to read the instructions. And not to let Seth near the power drill. Or let Dean near a hammer. Happy?”

She scowls. “I'm being a total control-freak aren't I?”

“Wouldn't have it any other way, baby girl.” I lean down and press my lips to her forehead, my hand curling over her waist and across her ever expanding belly.

“I just feel so useless,” she murmurs against my chest, her own hand coming down to rest on her bump as well. “I told you we were jinxed by calling this one Pumpkin. Why didn't we stick with Blueberry?”

I chuckle. “And I told you we grow 'em big in my family.”

“Yeah, don't I know it.” She rocks against me. “What time is it?”

“Almost ten. They'll be here soon.”

She nods, stifling back a yawn. “I swear I'm going to fall asleep in the middle of my pedicure. They turn that chair massager on and I'm a goner.” She pokes her belly. “All because someone decided that 3am was the perfect time to start practicing somersaults.”

“Why didn't you wake me?” Guilt and frustration washes over me. Guilt because I slept through whilst she was awake. Frustration that I missed out on seeing our baby move, the actions becoming more and more visible every time. Actions that I've witnessed once or twice in real life, but mostly on video with Lex's giggles in the background.

“You were tired,” she shrugs.

“You know I wouldn't have minded.”

“I know,” she smiles up at me. “Next time. I promise.”

I lean down and kiss her softly, groaning as I hear the doorbell sound. “Perfect timing as ever.”

Lex grins. “Like that was going to turn into anything else.” She winks at me, pulling back to head towards the door.

I watch her go, my head titling to the side as I take her in from behind. Her body is fuller than ever, but in the best way possible. She might complain about her swollen ankles and feet, the puffiness around her cheeks, the stretch marks working their way over her belly, how her bellybutton has gone from innie to outie, but to me she is more gorgeous than ever. There's more of her to love and hold, my hands stretching over her belly whilst I nuzzle at her neck and whisper how much I adore her and how incredible she is. I sound like a walking cliché, but I don't care. I may be on the road, working hard to provide for the three of us, but that's nothing compared to what she has done over the last eight months, growing and nurturing our baby inside her.

I promised her that I would still love every inch of her no matter what and I make sure that I do just that every time I come home. Even if recently, that's just been through kisses and hugs because Pumpkin has become so big that it's difficult to anything else. Not that I am complaining, no way. I'd rather spend an evening with Lex snuggled against me on the couch, than put her through any discomfort just to get my rocks off. Although sometimes she surprises me, like this morning when she joined me in the shower, leaning against me with a lazy grin on her face as her soapy hand grazed against mine.

“You coming?” Lex calls out to me from the stairs and I quickly follow her, reaching the bottom as she opens the front door.

“Are you sure you're not having twins?” Siobhan exclaims as she pulls Lex into a hug.

“Nope, just those Reigns genes doing wonders,” Lex shoots me a grin over her shoulder. “Pumpkin's getting the cardio in already, gonna come out of me already crawling knowing my luck.”

“Gotta start 'em young,” Seth chuckles as he too hugs Lex before reaching out to bump my fist. “Hey man, Dean and Becca are just pulling up outside.”

“Thanks again,” I tell him. “Appreciate it.”

He waves my thanks away. “Whatever. But you're paying us with beers later, right?”

“Of course, bro.”

“Take it we've got strict instructions from the boss?”

“I heard that, Rollins,” Lex pipes up, but Seth is saved by Becca coming through the door, closely followed by Dean, who nods at us over their heads.

“You're not allowed near the power drill,” I tell Seth, who scowls. “Hey, don't look at me man, I don't make the rules!”

“We've known that for a while, dude,” Dean chuckles as he claps me on the back. “You okay?”

“Yeah, man. You?”

Dean nods distractedly and I inwardly smirk as I watch him eying up Becca's hand on Lex's stomach.

“Not you as well,” Seth groans, causing Dean's eyes to cut to him.

“What?”

Seth cocks an eyebrow. “The misty-eyed look, bro.”

“You're one to talk.”

Seth opens his mouth to retaliate, but Siobhan pipes up instead. “So, how long do you need us to keep Lex out of here? A couple of hours long enough for you to read instructions, ignore them, mess up, start again and finally finish?”

“Such lack of faith,” Seth shakes his head. “We are completely capable of putting together a crib and shelving unit.”

“Considering past experience...”

“That wardrobe's still looking good though?” Dean points out.

“You never told them huh?” Lex raises an eyebrow at me.

“Told us what?” Dean queries.

“The wardrobe door fell off about a month after you put it together,” I confess with a smirk as Dean and Seth frown.

“Wow, way to crush 'em,” Becca giggles before reaching out to rub Dean's arm soothingly. “Just maybe make sure those screws are extra tight on the crib, yeah?”

“You not gonna stick up for me?” Seth asks Siobhan, who shakes her head.

“Nope. The day we put together that TV unit will haunt me forever. I had to wrestle the tools away from you before you caused a fatality.” She glances around with a grin. “And now that we've successfully bruised all your egos, maybe we should go?”

Lex steps towards me, reaching for her purse on the table behind. I take the opportunity to pull her into my side as she passes.

“We got this, don't worry,” I tell her. “Just enjoy today.”

“Hard to enjoy when I'm imagining every worst case scenario of you three with tools and flatpack furniture.” But her tone is light and she's smiling softly when she looks up at me. “Thanks,” she murmurs quietly. “I know it means a lot... For you to do this.”

She leans up to kiss me, her breath warm on my cheek and then my lips. I fight hard not to linger, but I can't help myself, my arms wrapping around her for a second longer than necessary. Her bump presses against me, her giggle soft against my lips as I shake my head when she tries to draw back. But her hands grasp mine and pull them apart. She looks up at me with a knowing smile.

Goodbyes have never been our thing. No matter for how short or how long.

Hello is where we're good.

My hands feel clammy as I walk up the narrow stairs, my suitcase scraping loudly against the wall, the bag on my back feeling awkward and heavy. I feel like I'm in high-school all over again, walking up the stairs to pick up some girl for a date, my tongue thick in my mouth, my mind blank of anything coherent.

Only this isn't high-school.

And it's not a date per se. In fact, I'm not sure what this is. I haven't been sure of anything since I first saw her. I do my best to keep things as normal as possible. The last city we met up in, I tried to keep us away from the hotel for as long as possible. I took her out for dinner, the conversation easier than I imagined and I found myself wanting it to last longer. So we walked around afterwards, her hand slipping into mine the second we left the restaurant, her body brushing against mine at any given opportunity until eventually, I couldn't help myself and I pulled her hard against me, my mouth claiming hers. I'm still so desperate to prove that I can be the ultimate gentleman, but the second her body is pressed against mine, reminding me of all the delicious ways it dips and curves and how incredible it feels in my hands, I can't help myself. I want to feel all of her on me. I want to taste every inch of her. I wrap her around me, groaning as her legs grip my waist tightly, her fingers digging into my hair as I splay my own hands across her back, down to her waist, her ass as I slide her up and down my dick with ease.

And when I have her like that, the only gentleman thing I can do is make sure that it's ladies first.

I round the final curve of the stairs and pause. Setting my suitcase down with a thump that echoes around the hallway, I wipe my hand on my jeans. I'm about to knock when I hear the lock click and the door slowly opens. My heart pounds furiously, my mouth going dry as Lex appears, her long dark hair pulled into a loose braid that hangs over one shoulder, her fingers plucking at the loose end as she bites her lip. She leans against the doorframe, one bare leg crossed over the other, the hem of her black silk robe resting mid-thigh, the matching belt cinching in her waist, the neckline plunging to reveal the swell of her breasts.

“Hey,” Lex breathes and my gaze flickers up to her face again. She smirks and I can feel my face flush.

“You look amazing,” I blurt out before I can stop myself, my need to have her so painfully obvious in the rasp and roughness of my voice.

“Thanks,” she smiles. “You look good too.”

She steps back to let me in, her hand brushing over mine as she takes the handle of my suitcase and wheels it inside to set by the door. As I turn to close the door, I can already feel her hands on my shoulders, easing the straps of my backpack away and setting it on top of my case. I exhale slowly, as I roll my head forward to release the tension in my neck.

“Better?” she asks, her hands sliding down my back.

“Yes.” I turn back to face her, but my gaze is drawn to the room behind her. Normally, I would never pay much attention to our surroundings, one hotel room is the same as another as far as I'm concerned. But today is different.

Today I'm stood in her lounge, taking in the couch strewn with cushions and blankets, the coffee table covered in magazines and papers, flowers in jars on the window sill, pictures of friends and family decking the walls. The kitchen lies to the right, the refrigerator door completely covered in old postcards, take-out menus and polaroid snaps and on the counter next to it, I spy an empty glass of wine and wonder if she is just as nervous as I am about being in her personal space.

“Sorry, it's a bit of a mess,” Lex murmurs.

I shrug, my arm automatically moving to around her shoulders, pulling her against my side. Wisps of hair tickle my hand as I lower my other to slip my fingers under her chin and slowly rock her head back so she looks up at me. “Don't apologise. And anyway, I didn't come here to see your apartment.”

She raises an eyebrow. “Is that so?”

I chuckle. “Ain't not use in playing innocent with me, Lex. Not when you're all dolled up this...”

“Dolled up like what?” she shoots back as she unwraps herself from my arm. She turns to face me, but takes a step back so she's out of arm's reach. “I wear this all the time...”

“Then how comes I've never seen it?”

“Maybe because you're so damn impatient every time we get behind closed doors?”

“I'd say you're as bad as me.”

To her credit, she blushes but she's quick to correct herself, the coolness never leaving her voice. “But this time, we've got all the time in the world.”

“True.”

“We've got time to appreciate all the little things...”

“Lex, you know full well there ain't anything little about me,” I grin as I take a step towards you.

She giggles. “Oh, I know that, big guy,” her eyes pointedly drop to my crotch before they drag up slowly, roving over my arms and chest before settling back on my face. “And now I've got all the time in the world to make sure I cover every inch...”

I swallow thickly as I watch her hands drop to her waist, her fingers slowly untying the knot. “Yeah?”

“But it's all in the details,” she tells me. “Like how you bite your lip when I trace your tattoo with my fingers... Or how your eyes squeeze shut when I lick from your hip down to your thigh... All those little things...”

I take a step towards her, my hand reaching out to slide around her waist. Only this time, I feel bare skin, the silk slipping back to reveal...

“Fuck, Lex...” I groan as I take in the blood-red lace that covers her breasts, the panties in the same colour that hug her hips.

“All in the details,” she smirks against my lips.

“Stop dicking around and pass me the damn drill!”

“No fucking way, bro. If Lex said you can't using the drill, then I'm not gonna argue.”

I chuckle to myself as I make my way upstairs, beers in hand.

“Scared of Lex, Ambrose?”

“Fuck you, man. I ain't scared of shit.” There's a brief pause. “Just don't fancy pissing off a pregnant lady.”

“Wise man,” I tell him as I round the corner into the almost completed nursery. “And you,” I turn to Seth. “Should know better.”

He huffs as I pass him a beer. “So what's the point of me being here if I can't actually do anything.”

“Hold shit together, pretty boy, whilst the real men do the work,” Dean grins as he accepts his own beer.

“Real men, huh?” Seth scowls. “How's that crib coming along?”

I flip him a finger in return. “Just fine.”

“Yeah, Lex'll be real impressed with the progress you've made.”

I look at the corner of the room, where it's taken me around an hour to construct the base of the damn thing. The instructions are already well-thumbed, the staples holding them together starting to loosen from the amount of times I've gone back and forth through them trying to make some sense of the diagrams.

“Fuck you,” I mutter under my breath, causing both of them to chuckle.

“We're nearly done anyway,” Dean nudges Seth to move his hand that's blocking one of the screw holes on the shelving unit. “We can give you a hand.”

“No, it's cool. I got this.”

“Why are you so determined to do that shit on your own?” Seth asks.

“I promised Lex.”

“She's not going to know if you let us help though.”

“Not the point.” I take a swig of beer and pick up the instructions again.

“Leave it,” I hear Dean mutter and then louder: “Becca said that Shiv was gonna stay down here for a bit with you guys.”

“Yeah,” I reply distractedly. “Just in case I'm not here when it all happens.”

“You know Lex sent her a pregnancy book to read,” Seth says. “Have you seen those things? Jesus.”

“Hang on, so if you're not here, Shiv is gonna be with Lex throughout the entire thing?” Dean asks.

“Pretty much. I mean,” I frown at the instructions and then reach for what I think is the correct piece of wood. “It's not like I don't want to be here...” I trail off.

I don't like thinking about it. I don't like the idea that I'm going to miss the birth of my first child. I don't like the idea of Lex going through this without me. I have every faith that Siobhan will make a great birthing partner for Lex, but it's not the same. Lex and I have discussed this many times over the last few weeks, but it still doesn't make it any easier.

“Surely the company understand though, right?” Seth says quietly.

“Sure. I get a couple of days extra off to be with her and the baby, but it's just not so easy to predict when. It's only a few weeks till her due date. It could happen next week or it could happen two weeks after the due date.”

“Sure, sure...” I can hear him chewing his lip. “Pretty shit though if you were to miss it.”

“Yeah,” I exhale. “Missed so much already. Classes, check ups. Oh and this...” I stand and tug my phone out of my pocket and thumb through it. “Lex filmed this the other week.”

I hand the phone over to Dean, who hits play. I turn back to the task in hand as I hear the sound of rustling coming from the phone and then Lex's voice: “Look who says hello...”

“Holy crap,” Dean breathes. “I didn't think you could actually see them moving.”

“Yeah, that was the first time you could actually see it. I mean, it's happened again when I've been here. But I just... I dunno. I wanted to be there for the first time. Not watching it on a recording, a few hours after because I've been driving or something.”

“I doubt Lex will let you miss out on anything though, bro,” Seth hands me back the phone over my shoulder. “Your phone is always kicking up a storm with texts and photos from her. Pun intended,” he chuckles.

I crack a smile of my own. “I know. But the birth is different.”

“I hope you're not suggesting my girlfriend films your wife giving birth.”

“What? No!” I cast a scowl behind me. “I missed out on being there right at the beginning, when Lex found out. I don't want it to be the same at the end.”

“Sure, I mean, you guys don't know what you're having either right?”

I don't answer Seth, faking interest in the next step of the instructions, hoping he doesn't notice.

“Yeah, I wouldn't like to find out over the phone or something,” Dean agrees with him. “Dude, you'll be there.” He reassures me. “You'll make it. Even if it's not for the beginning, you'll be there for the end.”

I grunt in response, desperate to pull all my thoughts back to here and now, where I can control what does and doesn't happen.

Because that's the worst thought of all. Being completely and utterly helpless, whilst Lex goes through pain that I can't even begin to imagine. I can't bear the thought of watching her suffer, no matter how amazing the end result will be. And if things go wrong... I shudder at the thought.

I don't want to admit to Lex that I feel like this. Every time we talk about it, I can sense she's holding something back and I wonder if she thinks the same of me. But this what Lex does. She buries away her fears, because she wants to show me she's strong. She's determined not to crack, not to show how vulnerable she can be.

My phone starts to ring just as I exit the rental office, keys in hand. I grin as I see Lex's name flash up on screen.

“Hey, I'm just about to get in the car.”

“Ro... About that...” she pauses. “I'm just going to be honest with you.”

“Okay...”

“These next few days aren't really a good time for me.”

I frown. “Something come up with work? That's cool, Lex. I can occupy myself during the day if that's what you're worried about.”

“No... It's not work. It's me.”

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I'm fine...”

“So...”

There's another pause.

“I'm on my period, Ro.”

I chuckle and I can almost see the scowl forming on her face. “What's so funny?”

“Lex, you don't have to cancel on us just because of that.”

She snorts. “If you think there is a slightest chance–”

“What? No, Lex. C'mon, what do you take me for?” I reach the car and unlock the trunk.

“Then why would you want to still see me?”

“Why do you think, Lex?”

She pauses and I can hear chewing her lip. “I don't know.”

“Yeah, you do.” I load in my suitcase and carry-on and slam the trunk shut. “I'll give you a few hours to figure it out. Do you want me to pick you up anything on my way?”

“Ro, seriously. You don't have to come out here.”

“I know I don't, but I want to,” I tell her as I climb into the driver's seat.

“I have no make-up on, my hair is a mess and I'm in oldest, dirtiest sweats.”

“Perfect.”

“I'm not moving from the couch all weekend.”

“You're really not saying anything that's putting me off, Lex. You gotta try harder than that,” I grin.

She sighs. “You really want to spend an entire weekend with me, when there is absolutely zero-chance of getting any?”

“Yes.”

“I don't believe you.”

“Then let me convince you otherwise.” I start the engine. “You didn't answer me earlier. Do you want me to pick anything up?”

“No,” she sighs again. “Let me know if you come to your senses.”

“Not a chance.”

A few hours later, I'm climbing the now all-too familiar stairs to her apartment. When I get there, the door is on the latch and I push it open tentatively. “Lex?”

“Told you, I wasn't going to move from the couch.”

“Fine, fine.” I make my way inside, placing my bags by the door as usual before stepping over to the couch where Lex is splayed out. I reach out and brush my fingers across her temple before leaning down to kiss her. “You okay?”

“I guess. Still don't know why you're here though.”

“Isn't that what boyfriends do?”

She raises an eyebrow. “Boyfriend?”

“Why not?”

She doesn't answer me, just shrugs.

I shift her legs off the couch and sit down, reaching to pull her up and against me. She whines softly, but lets me anyway, her hair, which is bundled up into a haphazard bun, tickling my cheek as she nestles against me.

“So you really don't know why I'm here?”

She's silent.

“I care about you, Lex. I know this all started out as a bit of a fun, something casual, but I think we both know it's a bit more than that now. I like hanging out with you, just being with you, watching TV, walking around the city whether that's here or Tampa or somewhere else entirely. I like doing stupid shit with you, like playing video games or going bowling or to the movies and just messing around just so I can touch you and kiss you and just be normal people getting to know each other. You make me laugh, Lex. You make me think about things I believe and what you believe and I like just shootin' the breeze with you. And sure, we have absolutely first-class sex as well,” I pinch her side softly and she squirms against me with a small giggle. “But that ain't just what this is anymore. The sex, I mean. It's that and everything else in between.”

“And today?”

I shrug. “I just wanted to see you. I haven't seen you in two weeks. And as much as I love seeing you all dolled up, you are just as beautiful in sweats and nothing else.” I lean down and brush my lips against her temple. “And if all you want to do is curl up on the couch and watch TV and sleep and eat, then I am more than happy to keep you company for that.”

Her eyes flicker up to meet mine. “You're too good to be true sometimes.”

“But all that is the truth, Lex.”

She chews her lip. “I... I guess I just didn't want to admit it.”

“Admit what?”

“That I feel that way too... Like I really did want you to come here today, but I was afraid that if I didn't tell you, you'd have been disappointed”

“I never turn up here expecting anything other than to just see you.”

“The times where you've kissed me hello and it's immediately escalated into so much more says otherwise.”

“I think we're both guilty when it comes to that, don't you think?” I whisper, feeling her shiver in my arms.

“Touche.”

I chuckle and lean back against the couch. “So, what are you watching?”

“See, now you're really going to regret coming here...” she grins back at me as she reaches for the remote.

But she couldn't be more wrong. As she settles back against me, I couldn't think of anywhere else I'd rather be than right here.

“You really finished that all by yourself?” Lex's voice is incredulous as we stand in front of the finished crib.

“Of course,” I tell her. “I mean, the guys held some of it together for me so I could get the screws in properly, but apart from that...”

She eyes me suspiciously. “Seriously?”

“We weren't allowed to do anything other than hold shit,” Seth pipes up from behind me. “We even filmed him for posterity's sake.”

“And so we don't get blamed if it collapses in a few months,” chimes in Dean.

Seth hands Lex his phone and she watches it with a raised eyebrow. “I'm impressed.”

“Full of surprises, right?” I grin at her.

She moves closer, passing the phone back to Seth before wrapping her arms around me. “Always have been, big guy.”

I lean down to kiss her and she smiles against my lips. The floor creaks as Dean and Seth make their way back out and downstairs and I'm about to follow when Lex stops me.

“Thank you for doing this. I know it meant a lot to you, but it means a lot to me too that you wanted to do it.”

“Anything for you and Pumpkin,” I tell her, my hand dropping to rub at her bump.

“It feels weird.”

“What does?”

“This.” She gestures around the room. “This is only going to be empty for a few more weeks. And like dinner tonight, it'll be the last time we're all together just the six of us. That's not weird to you?”

“I'd say surreal.”

She chuckles. “That's just a fancy word for weird.” Her hand slips into mine and she pulls me towards the door. “It's just... Did you think a year ago or even two years ago that this would be happening?”

“Sure,” I smile down at her. “I told you our time would come.”

“Maybe I should I have more faith in you,” she nudges me softly as we make our way downstairs.

“I've been saying that for years and you finally figure out that I'm right,” I tease back.

We enter the kitchen to find Becca and Siobhan unpacking cartons of take-out, Dean and Seth already helping themselves. Siobhan passes us both plates and there is a few minutes of commotion and laughter as we all load up our plates and grab drinks before taking a seat at the table.

Lex shifts her chair closer to mine, one hand slipping under the table to rub at my thigh as she picks at her food. I slip my arm around her shoulders and watch her lips twitch into a smile.

“So that's you guys all prepared right?” Becca asks after a few quiet moments.

“As we'll ever be,” I squeeze Lex's shoulder.

“What about names?” Becca asks. “You've both been incredibly secretive about that.”

Lex glances up at me. “Yeah, we've got that sorted.”

“Yeah,” I smile back, my heart beating faster as I think of the name we settled on a few weeks back. A name that we've now started to refer to Pumpkin in private.

“Oh man, you guys are such a tease,” Siobhan groans. “We've taken bets though.”

“Bets? On what?” Lex asks.

“Boy or girl, name, weight and due date.”

Lex glances up at me with a smirk. “And we weren't included because...?”

“Well, you know the names you've chosen.”

“Sure, but we don't know if it's a boy or girl...”

I'm trying my best not to laugh at Lex's poker face as she reasons with Siobhan.

“Okay, fine. You gotta write it down though – we all have. No-one knows each others answers.”

“Perfect,” Lex looks up at me again and winks.

“No offence, Lex, but don't you have kind of an unfair advantage when it comes to the weight?” Dean frowns.

“Excuse me, Ambrose?”

Dean's face flushes. “Well, you've had scans and shit, don't they tell you how much the baby's gonna weigh?”

“Perhaps but I think it's only fair seen as you've all been staring at my bump and trying to guess how much weight I've put on.”

“I think you'll find I've been quite nice in my estimate,” Dean pouts.

“You asked me how much a baby normally weighs and then you looked horrified when I told you,” Becca laughs. “For Lex's sake, I hope that you asked that before rather than after you wrote down your guess.”

Siobhan gets up and walks over to the refrigerator to tear off a piece of paper from the notepad. She hands it over to Lex with a pen.

I watch as Lex writes down the sex, weight and due date. “Really?” I ask her as I see the date. “You better hope that's not the date. I'm on the other side of the country that week.”

“Just our luck then.” She folds the paper in half and hands it back to Siobhan.

“Don't worry,” Siobhan tells me. “I've read the book and everything. Totally prepared.”

“You were all pale after you read the labour chapter,” Seth comments, ducking his head as Siobhan's hand rises to clip him.

“Oh, great,” Lex says dryly. “You'll be just like Ro then. They showed us a video in the class and all the first-timers looked scared shitless.”

“You included,” I remind her.

“Well, excuse me for being slightly anxious about the prospect of squeezing this out of me,” she squeezes my thigh. “You'll be fine, Shiv,” she reassures. “Just hold my hand and tell me to keep breathing.”

“That's the bit I'm worried about,” Siobhan grimaces. “Losing my hand.”

I pull Lex closer to me. “You'll both be fine, I'll get there. I'll be there.”

“Did you mean what you said earlier?” Lex asks as I pull back the sheets on my side of the bed. She's propped up against a mountain of pillows, her shirt rolled up to just beneath her breasts as she rubs moisturiser onto her bump.

“What's that?”

“You said you'd be there. For the birth.”

“Of course I meant it.”

“And if you don't, are you going to ever forgive yourself for missing it?”

“Lex, I'll be there.”

“Ro...” she pauses in her actions and turns her face towards me as I roll onto my side. “Be realistic. Despite your assertions that I'm wrong, you never keep your phone with you at shows. Once you've warmed up and changed into your gear, it gets buried under all your crap in your bag. And even if that doesn't happen, there'll be at least a couple of hours when you won't have it with you because you'll be doing meet and greets or meetings with Steph and Hunter or in the ring itself. But that's okay. You can't always have your phone with you in those situations.”

“But someone else can. I can leave my phone with Dean or Seth, any number of people and they can get a message to me.” I move closer, my hand resting over hers. “This isn't the first baby born to a wrestler, baby girl. There are ton of guys who've been through this and they made it.”

“But some didn't.”

“Sure, but I'm not going to let that happen.”

“But what if it does? Ro, c'mon, be realistic. Say you get the message from Shiv an hour after she calls. You bust your gut to get to the airport, there's traffic, there's a flight delay. You've got a show in Seattle a week before my due date. That's a five hour flight. Obviously, the labour could go on for hours, but what if something happens and they have to take me into surgery?”

“I'll be there.”

“You're not listening to me,” Lex says irritably. “What if that happens? What if, for reasons that neither of us can predict, you don't make it in time, are you going to let that hang over you forever?”

“I think the chances are highly–”

“Roman!”

I look up at her and see her face starting to crumple. “Hey... Baby girl...”

“For fuck's sake! Have you any idea how hard it is to sit here and listen to you tell me that it'll be okay and that you'll be there when all I can think of is all the situations where you don't make it and I'm there in fucking surgery, panicking because the one person I want to be there with me at that moment is stuck in traffic or in an airport on the other side of the country or even in a plane where no-one can get hold of him to tell him what's going on?”

I scramble to sit up, pulling her into my arms as tears start to spill down her face. “Hey... Lex, ssh... Don't do this to yourself. C'mon, breathe. Don't cry...”

“I can't help it,” she mumbles into my chest. “It's all I keep thinking about when you're not here. I keep thinking what if it happens now. What then? What am I going to do? Siobhan doesn't move down here for another week, what if it happens then?”

“You know what you do,” I tell her. “You call Dr Ash and tell her what's happening. And then you call a cab or an ambulance, whatever she suggests and then you call me once you're on your way and I will stay on that phone for as long as possible.”

“What if I can't get hold of you?”

“Then you call Seth or Dean and one of them will find me or get someone else to find me.” I work my fingers through her hair gently. “We've talked about this, Lex. We have a plan, right?”

“Things can still go wrong. What if–”

I press my lips to her head. “Someone will let me know Lex. Someone will find me and I'll be on a plane or in a car as soon as I can. The most important thing is that you get to hospital where they can look after you and the baby. That's all you've gotta worry about, just making sure that you and Pumpkin are in safe hands.”

“I don't want you to miss it,” she murmurs. “I want you there, Ro.”

“Hey,” I rock her back so I can see her face. “You know it's gonna take a damn act of God to stop me from being there, right?” I cup her face in my heads, my thumbs brushing across her tear-stained cheeks. I kiss her softly, easing her back onto her pillows before plucking the moisturiser from beside her.

Her fingers stroke through my hair lazily as I pour a small amount of moisturiser onto my fingers and slowly work it into the taut skin of her belly. I lean down further, my lips brushing across the stretch marks that curve up from under the bump.

“Anyway, me and Pumpkin have a deal.”

“A deal?” Lex asks dubiously.

“Yup, no appearances until Daddy's in the room.”

She giggles and then sniffs. “I'm still going to worry, Ro.”

“I know you will.”

I glance up to see her smile down at me. I kiss her bump again, breathing in the scent of cocoa butter. There's no point telling her I feel the same, no need to confirm her worst fears by saying they're mine as well. There have been many times over the years where Lex has been my rock, my anchor, my never-ending source of strength. And now it's my turn to do the same for her.

Even thought, ultimately, she's the strongest out of the two of us.

I roll over and switch on the bedside light, rubbing my eyes at the brightness.

I can't sleep. I've been in bed for almost an hour, just tossing and turning, my mind racing, adrenaline still pumping through me despite the three hour car journey from the last town to here. Not even the hot shower could soothe me, not even jerking off to the thought of Lex could calm me.

Reaching out for my phone, I flick through Twitter and then Instagram and my emails for a few minutes and then pause. My mind races through the calculations and I realise that calling her is not an option. Fuck.

I could really do with hearing her voice right now. Even just for a minute or two. She has this way of relaxing me, making me forget my aches and pains, the long days, the weeks that go by where we can only communicate via our cellphones. I mean, I'd give anything to have her in bed beside me right now, just to feel her in my arms, to be able to run my fingers through her hair, to be able to kiss her and hold her. That's all I want right now. That's all I need.

I miss her.

The sensation wraps around my spine, taking a strangle-like hold and I'm so engrossed in the feeling that my eyes go out of focus and I realise too late that Lex's name and face are flashing up on my screen. I'm a second too late in answering and I curse loudly as I hit re-dial instead.

“I woke you up,” she greets me. “I'm sorry. I didn't mean to.”

“No, it's fine. I couldn't sleep.”

“Long day?” She pauses. “Stupid question.”

I grin up at the ceiling. “S'okay. It was alright, I guess. Just still pumped up.”

“I caught the end of the show. I was out at a late dinner, but made it back to my hotel room in time.”

A warm glow washes over me. “I didn't know you did that.”

“Did what?”

“Try and watch my matches when you're away.”

There's a rustle of sheets in the background. “I like watching you, but... Oh, never mind.”

“No, tell me.”

“I...”

“Lex...”

“I like watching you, but then, I dunno... I feel a bit down.”

I frown. “Why?”

“I dunno. I guess...” she pauses. “I guess I just miss you.” Her voice is barely a whisper.

I can't help but chuckle.

“I know, silly right?” she sighs.”Ignore me, it's late, I'm tired.”

“I wasn't laughing at you,” I tell her. “I swear. It's just funny because...Well, just before you called I was thinking the same about you.”

“You're just saying that to make me feel better.”

“I miss you, Lex,” I tell her softly, slowly. “I really do.”

There's a long silence.

“I feel...” she starts and then stops.

“Go on,” I encourage gently.

“I feel bad for admitting it though.”

“Why?”

“I knew what I was getting into and I feel like I'm guilt-tripping you if I say I miss you, because there's nothing either of us can do to change any of this.”

“Don't feel bad about it. None of this is your choice.”

A wry laugh echoes down the phone. “It is though, Roman. I made a choice the second I gave you my number. You didn't push me into this, I chose this too. I knew what this meant and I feel silly for thinking that it would be easy to switch off and on.”

“You don't have to hide away from me, Lex. It's okay to tell me how you feel and if you miss me, you miss me. You can't help that.”

“I know. I just thought, I dunno... I just thought I was stronger than this.”

“Just because you miss me, doesn't make you weak,” I tell her gently.

“But it's not fair on you.”

“And you don't have to be strong for me,” I continue. “But I like that you want to be. I like that about you, Lex. I like how you care.”

She's quiet for a moment, her voice small and vulnerable when she speaks again. “Sometimes I feel like I've lost control, like I shouldn't be telling you all this.”

I shake my head. “It's who you are, Lex. I told you, you don't have to hide from me.”

She pauses. “Do ever feel like that? Like you've lost control?”

“With you,” I tell her. “Always.”

Five weeks later

I make my way down the corridor, back to the locker room. The place is alive with technicians and production staff all packing up to make a quick getaway to the next town. All I want is a long shower before Dean and I hit the road ourselves.

I push open the door and head inside, grateful for some peace and quiet. I slump onto the bench and close my eyes for a second, listening to my heart pound hard and fast. Cracking open one eye and then the other, I roll my neck slowly and then reach for my bag. Digging around, I curse as I realise I left my phone here, rather than handing it over to Seth or Dean like I always promised Lex I would.

I press the home button and my blood goes cold.

Siobhan

Missed call (10)

Voice mail (1)

I swipe frantically at the voice mail, entering my PIN wrong on the first and second attempt, cursing loudly.

And then:

“Shit, Roman, why aren't you picking up your damn phone? Look, Lex is in labour. Call me. Oh and get your ass back here. Now.”

Fin x

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