#inner child reading

[moooncats]

✿ Pick A Card ✿

✿ What Does Your Inner Child Think Of You? ✿

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✿ Pile 1 : Imagination , Chakra Clearing. ✿

Wow! This Pile so far is one of my favorites right off the back. Like seriously I RARELY ever pull out this elusive card and right off the bat.... blam! Haha what incredible energy we have here. So I'm hearing that your inner child is so stinking happy of the person that you've become. They love how you revel in the wondrous, mysterious, most beauteous power of your imagination, and let it whisk you away on a right-brained roomp through all things nonsensical, Suess plays Wonka style. To them, you're an off road adventurer, playing in the upside- down, glow-in-the-dark woods of posibility. There is no "no" here. Only "whoa!". And "flow". And "Holy moly, here we go!". (Hmmm maybe there was something in your brownies? c; ). Your inner child feels heard from you and is attentively hanging out with you feeling affirmed by every journey you set out to. I'm hearing "Your the best friend I could ever ask for." Omg pile 1 this is so effing sweet like seriously, they think you're such a cool, magical person. They wouldn't have it any other way! (:

✿ Advice From Your Inner Child ✿

Chakra Cleansing: Archangel Metatron: "Call upon me to clear and open your chakra's, using sacred geometric shapes. Your inner child want's to make sure that you are taking care of yourself and not over extending your energy ♡. Please make sure to cleanse your aura every once in a while. You can take a bath with essential oils, sage/paulo santo's your body and area, or do a salt water cleanse in a lake or beach. The water can be very cleansing and healing. As a native from Hawaii the beach would be my go to cleanse preference. (✿◠‿◠) 🌊

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✿ Pile 2 : Open Heartedness , Prioritize ✿

Wow pile 2 lemme give you a hug okay? 🫂 Seriously, you have been through some stuff. I'm picking up on heavy energy here. Your inner child is amazed at how unjaded you are. They have seen you go through some people who were absolute bummers. Did that experience make you salty in any way? Heck no. They see you as a strong warriror who always chooses to not let unhappy chapters make you into a monster. They appreciate that so much. If you let negative experiences turn you sour, then the jerks and bully's win. So you move on with an open and hopeful heart, if only because you hate losing to jerks. Pile 2 you are winners. 🏆💗 You kill people with kindness and don't let their bad energies mix in with your pure and thoughtful heart. Your inner child is so sweet, they tell me that they give you hugs and love that you are the person they have become. I'm hearing "We are misunderstood and not everyone will get us, but our hearts are always pure".

✿ Advice From Your Inner Child ✿

Prioritize: Archangel Metatron : "Focus on your highest priorities. I will help you get orginized and motivated". Pile 2, your inner child is amazed at how many ideas that you get from time to time. However, they want you to manifest your thoughts from the 4D and materialize them into the 3D. Proper planning and prioritzing will help you with that. Take out a sheet of paper, and start writing your goals, plans, anything that has to do with your future. They want to make sure that you at least have them written, so you can start "scripting" your dream life. If you don't know what scripting is, it's a form of manifestation that helps you with your ideal dream life. Try it out, it's free and does wonders. Your inner child wants to help you realize your power. I'm hearing your quite popular in the dream realm, you may have astral traveled before or have been looking into it. This is your sign to continue on that path. Congratulations pile 2! This is so far the longest pile that I've done so far. So many messages! ʕ￫ᴥ￩ʔ ♡

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✿ Pile 3 : Honouring Ideas , Clear Intentions ✿

Interesting indeed. This pile I'm hearing unlike pile 2, you are the type to go for your goals. Your Inner child is quite impressed with you! They love how many silly, serious, & whack a doodle ideas you come up with! Lmao, I'm hearing a specific scenario for every event in your life. What an amazing brain you have. This is my pile who always has their head stuck in a book, ears listening to a podcast, and an head full of wonder and ideas. When an idea comes to you, you honor it by doing your best to bringing it into being. You are a master manifestor. Ideas to you, are like children, and you proudly nuture them, knowing they'll grow and develop, and eventually make their way out into the world without ever really acknowledging how much time/money/love you shelled out for them. This is my piles who may be entrepreneurs. Seriously keep that ish up, you are definitely trend setters! Your inner child loves how smart and buisness minded you are. They are definitely proud of the person that you are and have become. (. ❛ ᴗ ❛.) ♡

✿ Advice From Your Inner Child ✿

Crystal Clear Intentions: Archangel Michael : "Be clear about what you desire, and focus on in with unwavering faith". Pile 3, I'm hearing that any idea you have will be brought into fruition. How lucky! The gods are definitely in your favor when in comes to Manifesting. Please do not stop dreaming, all your dreams will surely come true with the right intentions. 🌌☁️✨️

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[angelical-dreams]

☁️Guidelines:

✧ Send me a message (not an ask) with your name and the reading you’re choosing (or we can make a special mix for you) ✧ Let me know if you have a topic or question in mind. ✧ Payment is done through PayPal before the reading.

Please note: I won’t answer questions about third parties or give any kind of medical advice. I won’t predict exact dates. Readings are meant to be for advice and used as a tool.

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Don't be afraid to ask if you have any doubts! :) Keep reading for an introduction ~

I'm Bri, a 21 year old witch. My path is very eclectic, but I focus mostly on dreams, nature and music 🌊 I realized I could read auras at 12 and I've been doing all kinds of readings for 5+ years here on Tumblr ✧˚୨୧⋆ I still have so much to learn! But there are many clients that keep coming back and from what they have told me my readings are very helpful, honest, transparent, sweet yet concise and unfiltered (thanks for the lovely reviews btw!) 🕊️

So, if you're struggling, you need Divine advice or to connect with your intuition, if you want to connect with a specific spirit or deity or you need any kind of advice, come get a reading from me! :) I want to help you.

[lets-talk-spirituality]

Hi! Can I please ask for a channeled message from my younger self. I had to grow up way too young and never got to be a kid and now I’m suffering with all kinds of trauma. I don’t know if she hates me or is understanding but I’d like to hear from her.

Thank you in advance I am P.

Hi! I’ve never tried a topic like this before so let’s see what comes up.

Seeing a shy young girl, maybe 5, blonde, she’s holding her hands in front of her and swinging back and forth, wearing a blue denim dress with a red undershirt, shoulder length hair, we don’t hate you, she’s not looking at me, mischievous, it’s just we want to play more! Catch me, she’s running away and giggling, I want to be free (Penelope? Pippy? Pennie?) immediately thought of pippy long stockings, did you used to like playing with dolls? If so I’m being told you should play with dolls to appease your child self but that this playing can be a way you manifest for yourself by having the doll live out things you want for yourself (hmm that’s interesting and never come up before, new manifestation hack?)

she’s giggling and now being tickled (I’m viewing this looking down as if I’m engaging with her) and rolling in the grass, stop! Okay I’ll tell you the secret. You’re too mean to me, like mommy, I’m not mad at you, I’m scared of you sometimes, you can be so harsh and cruel and I want to run away, I want to hide where you can’t find me, you aren’t always mean, and I like you better when you’re nice and you ask me how my day was and we get ice cream and we go explore! I want to explore, huffing arms folded over chest, bigging up her chest, I love exploring and you never take me! All you care about is work. You never even want to play in the river or jump on rocks anymore. You’re scared to play because it makes you realize how much you’ve deprived us of this joy and it’s a painful realization for you to reconcile how you’ve treated us all this time. I love you so much, I just want to spend time with you, sad, rubbing eyes, seeking a hug, sometimes it’s like I’m not even here and I wonder if you’d be better off without me, I know I’m not always the best kid, but I don’t think I’m bad. I think you should love me and I need to be consoled over these feelings of being neglected by you, (like I’m feeling deep feelings that they eat to be held close and comforted over these feelings) I want to cry and you tell me you love me and I’m not bad and that you’re sorry, I want you to be my friend and make us matching bracelets (seriously maybe make a friendship bracelet that symbolizes the connection between you and your younger self, again something new I’ve never thought of before). I just want to be loved (is your core wounding around unlovability because the child coming through feels misunderstood and unloved and is dying to be seen and cared about)

I’m gonna link to this inner child processing I found on YouTube that I’m gonna recommend you try.

Card Pull—Fairie Oracle

Let yourself believe in magic again, that’s why the fairie oracle asked to be used by your inner child, they want to go to the forest and see fairies and find magic again.

Light— the Fairy Queen of light comes to shed love and light onto your current situation, and to remind you that light can penetrate the darkness

Hidden Depths— something hidden is about to come to light—perhaps a secret or memory at the back of your mind. When we expose what is hidden, we become free.

So one I feel like shine a light on the darkest parts of yourself to penetrate the darkness and to dissipate it. Second the processing method I sent, when I tried it, I had a memory come up I had forgotten about so maybe that processing will facilitate something coming to light. Oracle was spot on. I also feel that you doing this work is part of your light work, will allow you to feel lighter, and also to shine brighter. It may be painful, light can burn, but it’s better than being blind.

Ultimately my advice is to remember things you liked or wanted in your childhood and find ways to engage with that more. Say yes and give them what they want as much as you can, now. For me, if I see chalk and want to draw on the sidewalk I do, I play in the sand and with the waves, I got my belly button pierced because 8 year old me wanted one so bad. It feels scary at first because it’s like what if people think I’m crazy or weird?? But your inner child work is more important than that.

Wishing you the best of luck, my fellow wounded healer baby! Inner child work is fucking hard and I commend you for this question and what you’re doing for yourself. Sending you all the love and magic you can handle. Mwah 💋 ✨💕

PS would love feedback about this since I’ve never done one like this before.

[the-tarot-witch22]

Messages from your inner child - Pick a pile

Pile 1/ Pile 2/ Pile 3

My Paid Readings | My insta | My October goal

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Hello everyone ! This is my another pick a pile or pac reading so please be kind and leave comment or reblog, and let me know if it resonated with you!

Note : This is a general reading or collective reading. It may or may not resonate with you. Please take what resonates and leave what doesn't. And it's totally okay if our energies aren't aligned!

How to pick : Take a deep breath and choose a pile which you feel most connected to! You can choose more than one pile, it just means both pile have messages for you!

I worked really hard on this pile please show some love by leaving comments, likes and reblogs!

Pile 1

(The cards I got for you guys - 3 of pentacles , 6 of wands)

Okay so the first thing i feel and heard is you inner child is quite proud of you and your growth, i also heard "in the process of healing" so many of you could be already healed or trying to heal, your inner child feels complete from this accomplishment of yours, I also heard for some of you, your inner child say "the love you always craved was already inside of you", why worry, when things are starting to fall into it's place, i know its hard but know the way i see you grow, from all those phases, hardships and you grew to be that exact person i always wanted to be, so own up to it, you deserve it all, and much more, for some of you your childhood could have been harsh or one of your parents too hard with you. I feel happy when i see you smile or laugh or when you bright up the room, i know someone worthy of us will see it, you have learnt a lot, haven't you? i see that growth in you, how mature you have become, but one thing hasn't changed is, your kindness, i am glad to see that in you, I feel so grateful to you and others around you that they love you, i see you walking towards your goal, path. I see our work we put in at times, became so rewarding and fruitful, all thanks to you. i also hear your inner child saying "don't be lazy okay?, we have so much to achieve" but along with that rest, don't stress too much, i feel and know you would do great! You could be the elder sibling or parent type of your loved ones~

with love.

Gosh your inner child is quite sweet and yet gave mature vibes, this pile gave me earth sign and Aquarius sun/moon/rising energy.

Pile 2

(The cards I got for you - king of pentacles, 9 of wands, 4 of pentacles, the empress)

Okay so the very first thing i feel and heard for this pile is, you could have had lots of expectations on you from very young age, like you would have to understand the family situation, and this group had "mature beyond your years" and the energy of this pile is heavy you could be the most emotional and sensitive and yet you learnt to hide it better, or there were times, grown ups around you didn't listen to you, or most of the times you were misunderstood, I also feel this pile could have gone through hard school life or home life, contemplating if you are not perfect you could not be loved, this group might also had big dreams when you were a child and wanted to see yourself in luxury, and experience what your inner child could not, I also feel there some people around you who "bullied or teased" you like making comments that are hurtful and them still making it or making it seem like it was a joke, which could have lead to your insecurities. Anyhow, let's dive into your reading. I heard your inner child say "you are perfect and more than enough as you are, you don't have to try to fit in because were never meant for that", "you were meant for more, to be unique", damn to those who were against you and your dreams, and know i am proud of you, and we will reach where we always wanted to be, i see your inner child being emotional and the energy here is heavy and mysterious, like i feel you did emotionally go through a lot, but i see your innerchild giving you some messages i am hearing "we got this", "we did it", "we made it", "we have to be successful", such a determined energy here, but i also hear , to go easy and be kind to yourself, you don't always have to the bigger person, you can make mistakes that is okay", i also see you patting your inner child back and them giving you a reassuring hug. Like they are telling you its all going to be okay, I also feel you could always have had liked luxurious items. A very random message but anyways, i feel your innerchild telling you it's okay to not be okay at times, you are also a human, be kinder to yourself everyday, love yourself the way you love others. Your inner child talks a lot, and its adorable and i also feel your voice or emotions could have been shut out. So they feel proud when you stand up for yourself.

That's all my lovelies, *i am closing the reading by sending virtual hugs to you pile 2*, just keep going~

Pile 3

(The cards I got for you - 9 of cups and page of pentacles)

Okay so the very first thing i feel is your inner child being totally satisfied. for some of you in this pile could have been the naughty kid lol they love your chaotic yet that honest energy, they also like that you have been healing and working on your growth, they like your chill energy and the friends you have made, they like how you trying to be more confident in your body, they feel so loved and cared for, your inner child is literally beaming with satisfaction, i also feel some of you could fulfulling your childhood dream more likely studying or making a career or name for yourself, I also hear your inner child says that they love you, all those tough times actually helped you becoming better, i see and feel your innerchild loves creating art or express themselves through the same like art, music to express how you actually feel. Okay so random, guys did you ever manifested something like something close to you and your innerchild or wrote it in journal i feel its going to be coming true! but anyhow, this pile has light hearted energy and your innerchild still is inside you so embrace it, and do try to once in a while pamper them~ I hear your innerchild say "good changes and your wishes will come true, just be true to yourself".

Thats all for you pile 3~

Thank you for stopping by! Take care and remember you are loved <3

[otaku553]

Haha

[positivelyadhd]

i have been reading through the diary I kept from ages 14-17 and realising how helpful it can be to keep a record of how you're feeling at different moments.

not only is it helpful to write down and process how your feeling and give yourself time to truly think about it, it's nice to have something to look back on. to not just remember how you felt about a certain situation but to actually have yourself from that time tell you.

and also, from an adhd perspective, it's really lovely to have reminders of things I'd almost entirely forgotten. it's easy to think that your life right now isn't interesting, but in 5 years time? to know what songs you were listening to or book you were reading or even that Thing that you were so worried about but now you can't even remember the details. it's nice to have a physical reminder that time passes and things really can get better.

[auset66]

What your inner child wants you to know (Never heard before specific messages). 🎯👼

1. The Orange Girl 🍊

I see that you are a very practical and hardworker person. Past few days or weeks I feel is you are having some problems related to health or things just not going your way. I see the mental fog you cant pin point but things are just going wrong. A lot of confusion. You are also doing everything practical you can to deal with this but the thing is it is the matter of emotions and heart. 🧊🧹

Now the inner child of you wants to be free and have free flowing emotions. Now I feel you are that person who has been very emotionally detached from yourself as long as you can even remember living. Like you go and work hard and make things right physically. You might be that A class person "cold hearted" who is always about work work work. So why have you been like this? Because there is this fear of expressing yourself. Now I don't know if it because of seeing poverty or because of your parents being so strict not letting you be freely yourself. It could be many things, but the main energy the main source I see here is fear. That is now ingrained in your mind since the very young age. But you are exhausted now and your physical reality your health your body is giving out these signs. Calling you out to let your emotions flow free be the wild animal and live life freely in peace in happiness. What you can start by doing is maybe writing, drawing or even just try crying. It might be very very out of comfort zone but you can give it a Try. One thing you can do is write your feelings down everyday or everynight in the dairy or note app anywhere without any filters. Do what "feels" right. Very foreign to you rigth? And offcourse if you can I highly highly recommend consulting a therapist, not a psychiatrist, a psychologist. A good therapist can really understand all your problems and will help you out through this. That's their work afterall. What you need is therapy not medicines. Goodluck ✨️❤️

2. The blue walker. 🌧

Okay, so the first feeling I feel is happiness. Yeah I know you will be like... what happiness I literally hit rock bottom this time. Yes you did. I see a relationship or something very long term even could be your long term work it all breaking off. You lost something for sure or even someone. Whatever it was you made the decision already and are feeling a lot of uncertainty now about the future and everything. But (yes don't forget this reading) in few months from now you will see you feeling happy that type of happy you never even thought you could feel. You changing drastically growing naturally feeling natural and almost at peace. I feel whatever situation you left there was a lot a lot of masking up, a lot of chaos, people especially, lot of you doing and gaslighting yourself to do feel things you never wanted to. So this thing that ended your inner child is almost happy and thanking you actually that you finally let it go. All you have to do right now is to be patient and breathe. Rest. Let it flow. Whatever you doing right now you are doing right. You will see the change in yourself that you never even thought could happen. The change in your life the reality. Then look back at your life you had when you were in this "cage" I should say. And one more thing that I never say in my reading but it was strong so I see a person a good person entering in your life yes a romantic intrest. With this person you won't have to beg for attention or love or even have to pretend that you are Not clingy or that you are very cool person. You can just let be and this person will do everything without you even asking. You will be happy and feel free. Good luck. I honestly see a very bright and happy future and days. ✨️❤️🍃

3. The Green Rain 🍃

So I see you are a person who actually is really in tuned with their emotions. A good person a nurturing person. Having compliments about your motherly nature and being a caring person is not something new. So I see there is this calling in you which wants to make things right. Make the world a happy place. You love people and you are a humanitarian person. The thing is this energy is put on the people around you. Relationships, friendships and you know just these people. Most if not all these people are very immature and wants you to keep on giving and giving without expecting anything in return. Now the problem is you, that you think you feel that it is your responsibility to mother them, to nurture them to bring Them back to path. You feel like "give me all your pain let me alchemise it for you, because I know how it feels how to deal with it". You put yourself in others shoes, but the problem is these people are not giving the results back. They are just keep on becoming more dependant on you keep on taking all your life force out of you. Why you still think it is right even when you are so emotionally Intelligent? It is because of your childhood trauma of having irresponsible parents, huge mother issues. You feel if you won't do it everything will fall out. Your worth is only when you "protect" these people. What you can do? You should know that there is a line. The truth why you are still keep on doing it? And the truth is the trauma response not the empathy in this case.

The inner child in you wants to put this energy into something that will give the results back. What do i mean? Give a try to NGO work or becoming a clinical psychologist or world health or even teaching anything everything you can think of that will actually give the results back. Not the big manipulative corporations but the actual things that can help people not them keep on falling back to same cycle with you repetiting the same. You want to give to the world and you want results back. If you invest money in charity you want them to be invested in what charity told it will be invested it and not in their bank accounts becoming black money.

And yes the person whoever it is you are romantically involved in yes even if it is just a situationship. leave.You and me we both know how sneaky and immature this person and won't ever grow and especially never with you. The happy family dream... this person is far from that. Don't waste your wisdom and energy on these energy Sucker people in your life and put them into those who actually needs it. That's what your inner child wants. To make things equal and right. The change in world won't happen if you keep on mothering a litreal adult with mommy issues. Goodluck. 🍃❤️✨️

[cosmic-ghost-hermit]

Pick a Card: Message from your Inner-Child

Your inner baby needs you to listen. This reading will help them speak their mind clearly. Will you hear them out? Take what resonates and let go of all the rest but be willing to accept new experiences.

☀️Donate to my CashApp🌙

(fund my inner child's joy)

Feel free to drop any reading suggestions in my inbox. I'll keep them in mind when divining the wisdom that needs delivered to y'all's lil ears. Thank you in advance for all your help and support!

Decks used are The Kawaii Tarot, Pure Magic Oracle, Romantic Lenormand and The Karma Cards.

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PILE ONE

Astrology: Capricorn, Aquarius, Libra

Song: Pantsuit Sasquatch by Molly Lewis

Vibes: Green, red, night sky, thorns, bouquet, red flowers, chess, star gazing, alligator, aroma therapy, herbal remedies, apothecary, rabbits, snake skin, olive branch, Zues, Demeter

Cards: 6 of Swords, Saturn, Tower, Lilies, Herbal Craft, Hallowed Heart

Hello, pile 1. Your inner child is really tired of having to be the adult for people who are older than them. They are tired of playing mentor for those who should be mentoring. They want to be done with those people. They are holding up a building with their tiny arms and their shaking frame. As if someone put the world on their shoulders and asked them to carry it with bones that were not developed enough to hold it and without the mental fortitude to withstand the pressure. They wish to rest. They wish to lash out at the adults who relied on them before they were ready or willing. I see your inner child resembles Alice in Wonderland. After the wicked adults in your inner child's life grew white flowers, they demanded it was your fault and made you paint the white roses, red. They took their purity. They hurt you a lot.

The main message I am hearing from them is, "Please be gentle with my little heart and my small frame. I was treated harshly purely for being alive. I need healing. I need time to rest and recuperate. Please do not yell at me for my mistakes. Please do not hurt me for my shortcomings. I did not ask to be here. I only wish for it to get better than it is now. I'm sorry I wasn't mature. I'm sorry I've been impatient but I have been patient for so long. I've spent so much time waiting for my caretakers to do their jobs. Please. I don't need structure. I need relief."

They do not hold you accountable for everything that happened to you, my dear. They are reaching their little hands out for you to help them up. They want to be more present in your life. They want to have fun again. They didn't have enough of it as a child. They want to play outside. The last message I'll leave you with is some advice I find very important.

"Play is the psychological opposite of Trauma."

____________

PILE TWO

Astrology: Scorpio, Gemini, Cancer (maybe libra)

Song: Burn Your Village by Kiki Rockwell

Vibes: Grey, pink, purple, corvids, pinecones, sage, lavender plant, grizzly bear, spider, scorpio, eagle, hummingbird, long hair, video games, D&D, law, Zephyr, Eurus, Callisto, Artemis, Hecate

Cards: Justice, Clouds, Bear, Hecate's Path, Songbirds, 8th House

Hi, pile 2. Your inner child is full of vengeance. I see that without the vengeful energy they are very respectful and kind. Their anger is extremely understandable and a reaction induced by the environment they grew up in. Your inner child has an intense sense of justice. They know they have been treated unjustly by the authority in their life. Those in control of their circumstance took their autonomy and right of trial. The authorities judged you harshly for no good reason and were unpredictable. The authority would explode at random instances making them hard to anticipate. They were dangerous. Purely because they wanted to make your life miserable to cope with their own miserable life. Your inner child did not deserve that. Your inner innocence was corrupted into a furious and resentful person. They are aware they deserved better. They were conscious of their mistreatment. I see they could have been mistreated because of their race or gender.

The message I am hearing the loudest from your inner child is, "Those filthy horrid people deserve to atone for their wrong doings. No one helped me. They didn't even listen. They took that authorities word for truth and no one heard my side of the story. I am not a liar. I am not guilty. I did nothing wrong and now my older self doesn't even believe me either. The people who did this to me will pay. They will face justice if I have to be the one to dish it out. I hate them. I hate what they turned me into. I was pure. I was innocent. Now look at what they have made me. This isn't fair. This isn't right! Why was I treated this way!? Why does no one believe me?! I will never abuse power like that person did. I will end this cycle of abuse. I release and remove everyone who blamed me without learning the whole story. I am letting go of the pain they put me through. They do not deserve me or my kindness. They only deserve my hatred and resentment. I hope they burn."

Your inner child begs you to protect them from the people who did this to you. I can feel they are still in your life. It might be a father or a brother or an uncle. I also see it could be a pastor. Your inner baby will continue to lash out at random times because they have no where to aim all this negative emotion. They want to be free of guilt that shouldn't be theirs. They want to be free of judgmental eyes. Free them from the illusion that this authority laid over everyones eyes. I leave you with one last message.

"The weakest link will target the strongest link to avoid that they're useless."

_________

PILE THREE

Astrology: Virgo, Leo, Sagittarius

Song: Heart of a Dancer by The Happy Fits

Vibes: Blue, pink, forest green, androgenous, duality, 2b hair texture, robins, blue jays, coffee mugs, sculpting, yin/yang, balance, rose quartz, pearl, magnolia tree, gardening, bonfire, 3rd eye, Aphrodite, Hermaphroditus, archangel Samuel, Lucifer Morningstar, Baphomet

Cards: 8 of Cups, Birds, Woman, Pyro-kinesis, Closing Circle, Virgo, 7th House, North Node

Hey there, pile 3. I feel many complex emotions from your inner child. I see how they were conditioned is much different than how they genuinely are. They were conditioned to be quiet, serene and passive. But when they are acting genuine it is exact opposite. They are loud, angry and active. There is a need to walk away from their conditioning and those who conditioned them. They don't know how to ask that of you because of how they were taught. They do not speak unless spoken too and this makes it difficult for them to communicate with you. They are anxious they will be punished if they ask for anything of you. Invite them forward and allow them to speak their mind. They hold back a lot of emotion that needs to be expressed. You need to be open to hearing what they have to say.

The important message I need to tell you from them is, "You will benefit from our collaboration. I'm sorry for speaking up but you are not following your heart anymore. You are following what you have been told. This is not authenticity that you display. It is fake. Even if it is well-meaning you are not yourself. You are pretending to be someone else. Please let me express my rage. Please let me express my heart. I can't hold it anymore. I don't wanna feel this way anymore. Let me chatter and chirp and yell and scream. I wasn't allowed to when I was young. I need the freedom to do so now. Allow me to open doors I was never allowed to enter. Please see me in my full complexity. I am more than just a pretty face. I am more than my body. I am a person. I have personality. I have beliefs. I am a benefit to society when I can speak. I am not a waste. I am good as I am. I don't need to bottle my true self to make others comfortable. Free me, please."

They are asking you to allow yourself and your inner child to be themselves. They deserve space to exist freely without having to hide themselves away. I honestly don't need to say much more but I will leave you with one more piece of advice.

"Authenticity is the most powerful way to exist."

___________

PILE FOUR

Astrology: Taurus, Aries, Pisces (maybe aquarius)

Song: If My Heart Was a House by Owl City

Vibes: Muted colors, yellow, orange, fairies, sunflowers, barn owl, cat mint, raptors, vase, eyes, beards, lotus, candles, chimneys, diamond, playing cards, hobbits, anime, Apollo, Athena, Aphrodite

Cards: King of Pentacles, Sun, Owls, Ancestors, Gnomes, Aquarius, Venus

Hello and welcome, pile 4. Your inner child is asking me to tell you that you won't find the love you are looking for in other people. You won't find it in romance. You won't find it in friendship. At least not until you can find it in them. They didn't have the luxury of building their life on an identity that was theirs. They don't even know who they are. You need to explore them. Discover yourself in them. Be friends with them. They long for connection and the only one who can give that to them is you. They spent their whole life just trying to survive that they found identity in the pain they experienced. There is so much more to them than victimhood. So much more than their trauma. They are bright as the sun and immensely smart. They are funny and creative. Let yourself and your inner child grow beyond your collective pain and become something more. Your family isn't the pinnacle of humanity. I have a feeling that your family might have a narcissist among them. They are only a facet of humanity, my friend. There is so much more to your life than being approved by others. You are made of magic. You need to see that.

The message I hear from your inner child is, "I'm done striving for love from people who never intend on giving it to me no matter how perfectly I perform. I'm tired chasing something I'm never going to catch up too. I've always known I'm better than that. They made me feel so small though. They made me feel so pointless and useless. I worked so hard for their love but they will only ever love themselves. They will never have enough room in their heart for me. They make me feel like I'm not enough. I want to give myself the love they never could afford for me. I want to be loved so much. I want to be held and cherished the way I deserve to be. I am enough even if they say I'm not. I've always been enough even though I'm small. They are a giant black hole of emptiness and nothing. They are jealous of my light. I wish my older self could see that. I'm not selfish for wanting to be loved. I'm not wrong for wanting to be adored. I'm worth the effort. Please, see that it's true. I want to be known for who I am. I want to be discovered. I wish so deeply to be seen and appreciated. I'm the only one who can do it."

Your inner child is asking something of you. They ask you to take the role of mother and father for yourself. A role that was never filled even if you had your parents in your life. They neglected you. So much so you felt like you didn't deserve love but you desperately craved it. My dear, I will leave you with one last message and then the rest is up to you.

"You are worthy of being loved by you."

[puddii-ng]

a nostalgic feeling ♪

[elialys]

ANNA TORV as Olivia Dunham (Fringe) | 1.15 Inner Child

BONUS:

[tarotwithavi]

Messages from your inner child 🎁🪐

How to choose a pile?

Close your eyes and take a deep breath and ask the angels to show you the right pile for you and open your eyes. The first pile that catches your attention is the right pile for you.

Masterlist

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Hello if you're reading I hope you have a great month ahead!

Pile 1

Hello I hope you are fine I just want to ask you how are you coping up with it. We promised to be a kind person did we not? Are you still that kind person? I am not talking about how you treat others I am talking about how you treat yourself. Are you being kind to us? I just get upset sometimes when you don't treat yourself the way you treat your good friends because I am your friend too. Are we doing our dream job? Are we doing what we dreamed of? No? Do we have the friend group that we always desired? Are we popular now? Are you putting enough work to get all that we desired? I am not blaming you I am just reminding you that to get what we desire we need to put in the same effort. You know you are capable of all that you desire, you're worthy of all that you desire but things will not be served on a silver platter for you.

I see that a lot of you have been hurt and yourself healing from all those experiences. I also see that some of you may have been through a miscarriage or death of a child. Your inner child just wants you to know that everything will be okay and you will be fine. I also see that some of you need to take action to fulfill your dreams. You have the idea that you just need to put it to work. Follow your dreams, are you the person your inner child will be proud of? Ask yourself. What can you do to be the person you always dreamt of becoming as a child?

Pile 2

Hello! I know you have been really stressed lately. I know things did not work out the way you thought they would or the way you wanted them to but I just want you to know that the upcoming days are a blessing. You have done enough for us now it's your time to take a rest and finally give yourself the credit you deserve. I do not feel good when you overwork yourself. If you look closely we are currently living one of her childhood dreams you just need to acknowledge that. You are already doing enough to become the person you are meant to be and sometimes life does punch us in the face but we have to stand strong. Do not be harsh with your words, do not look yourself in the mirror and say harsh things because I live inside you. Yes, things are really bad. Yes we do not have the money to get some work done but it will be alright. Remember “This too shall pass”. The people the times the beauty all these things are temporary with the only thing that is permanent is your mind. People leave you, time changes and beauty becomes not so beautiful with time but it is only your brain that remains the same. Yes it does go from frequent changes but in the end it's your brain that is going to stay with you forever. so keep that positive and do not let those negative thoughts get to you.

Alright so this may be a really specific message but I am getting that if you used to have a twin who couldn't survive , they are now one of your spirit guides. I also want you to know that you are going to reap the fruits of what you bore in the past. For example if you did a good thing and forgot about it then you are getting the good Karma back but if you did a bad thing then this is just the karma getting at you. For some of you you are about to meet your soulmate and have a long term relationship with them however I would suggest you to not obsess over the thought of having a soulmate because that may repel them. I also see that your inner child is proud of you actually and they really want to give you a big hug. Imagine your child self hugging you and patting you on the back.

Pile 3

Hello!!!!! Do not be sad, we have to prove people wrong, right? We have to prove that we are enough and we have to prove that they have been wrong for a very long time. They have been wrong about the world, they have been wrong about us, they have been wrong about what beauty is. Honestly I don't think there is anything they have been correct at. Just keep doing what you are doing. I am really proud of you and you should keep being yourself. Show them your sarcastic side and talk back to them. You are doing enough I said and that's the end of the topic. They can be the one to speak or to start a conversation or even an argument but we will be the one who ends it. You are here to break generational curses . What people say should not bother you. In fact what people say should not bother anyone because they don't pay our bills. I don't know how you become so anxious because this is not you, we are carefree, we are cheerful and we are beautiful.

Alright so your inner child seems sassy so to say. I also see that you have been receiving messages in your dreams or your about to. I also see that if you are thinking of starting a new business or giving a job interview or filing for a job then you should definitely do it but be really careful of what information you share. Some of you may be having nightmares recently because your room is really cold. Things about to change life will turn drastically. It's like you are about to shift realities. Right now you may be doing two jobs or maybe managing work and job and may be really stressed about yesterday's work and your personal life but you're about to shift into a reality where you will not have to worry about these things. You are about to shift into a reality where your manifestations will come to reality within seconds.

[finleycannotdraw]

trying out a different brush pen for coloring!! this is a scene from chapter 10 of With All the Hope and All the Doubt by QueenScarletTheKing on ao3 :) it’s part 2 of a series, and I highly recommend checking it out for a fun au, hilarious and emotional writing, the boys being dumb, nimona being a cat, and a great journey of how anxiety is different depending on how you’ve lived!!!

not gonna lie, I drew the kitchen the way I’ve been picturing it in the fic but I have no idea if it’s accurate

[lets-talk-spirituality]

Trigger warning!

Hello I’m S. Can I get a message from younger self? I have PTSD and I believe I was SA when I was young. My brain is foggy about that day, I only remember bits and pieces. But my question mainly focuses on how my younger self is doing and what messages she has for me.

This is a very important topic to me. Im hoping you could answer but if not, I totally respect that.

Thank you I will leave feedback. -S. Cancer. Libra. Pieces

Hi! I know this was sent in May. This summer was really rough for me so I got a bit behind on my reading requests, but I’m hoping that this is still something relevant that can help you.

Younger self of S, what do you want to say?

Hi, I’m scared, scared of the world, it’s so big and I feel so small, like I can’t do anything I want to, I know I shouldn’t be so afraid but what if I die or someone I love dies? I can’t handle loss. I really just want to play and have fun and be free like those other kids but I’m not like them. I feel so different that no one will ever understand me (they’re talking in baby voice but they’re very verbally expressive of emotions, this feels like this child is about 4/5) I don’t mean to be different (looking down and fidgeting). I don’t think other people like that I’m different but I can’t change either (frustrated) so I just don’t know how to be so I keep to myself and play imagination games.

My favorite? I like to pretend I’m an astronaut, I love space, I hope I can go there someday, the sky is so big and beautiful, I like my own stories I can create, I like getting to be all sorts of things. I wish I had more friends in real life but I have a lot of imaginary friends I talk with and they keep me company when I’m lonely. I feel lonely a lot. Mommy and daddy don’t even understand and I don’t want to upset them so I just be a good kid, play in my room, stay out of the way. I’m scared when adults yell and get angry, I’m scared they might hurt me and I’m scared of being hurt. I just feel so scared all the time, like I’m only safe in these stories I create, I’m happier there and I like it there so much more. I wish I really lived there all the time. (Seeing them spinning around outside in grass, to me it’s showing they feel free and joyful, peace in these places they created)

How can big S help you little S?

I want to be less scared! I want to know it’s all okay and we’re okay and that nothing bad is gonna happen. I want S to protect us, to be careful with us, to not do anything too dangerous, the right amount of risk.

But what exactly can they do?

Dream, daydream, let’s make stories again! We love stories, dreaming of all we can be. We don’t do that enough. We’re more about reality these days and I hate it. Because the world is so scary I just feel more scared.

Notes: what’s coming through is like your younger child is very anxious and scared, so I’d say stay away from the news or things that will scare and upset you, really cultivate peace and safety in your space so that you can help ground her more in the present, maybe write out the stories, what did you want to be when you grew up? Spend some time thinking and creating stories around this.

In terms of SA, that didn’t come up exactly. It felt like they are generally fearful of making someone upset so that tells me some adult must’ve been really upset at them and it scared them like they said, they’re really into escaping into fantasy lands which tells me they lack something in reality, it seems they feel isolated from their parents, like they can’t tell them something, and something happened that makes them feel different from other children, these could all be a result of SA but that didn’t come up because whatever the event is, it’s foggy to your inner child too so idk if they are too young to remember or if it’s that far back in the subconscious. All they know is they’re scared and that’s the main thing I was shown. They fear adults, and angry male adults particularly, that came through strongly, they felt shy but more like fearful not like anti social but more like just scared and happier with just being alone with themselves.

Card Pull—Chakra Exploration Deck

What can S work on healing to help their inner child?

It took a minute for these cards to come out, so I feel like this information is somewhat hidden from you, maybe by yourself or your inner child, but like these are deeply buried things to work on, more subconscious.

Throat Chakra— in what situations or settings do you withhold or dim your expression from fear of judgment?

Mantra: “I allow myself to be untamed in my impulses for expression and release the fear of judgement, knowing they have nothing to do with me”

Throat chakra healing makes so much sense with how much your inner child seems to not speak up from fear of angering people. You need to do healing work around speaking your truth to people.

Throat chakra— when and with whom do you feel safest to express your unfiltered and undiluted self with? What does this version of you look like?

Mantra: “I am eternally safe to express the deepest, truest and rawest versions of myself that long to be witnessed.

Love when card pulls confirm the channeling. Your inner child is so fearful of being who they are, I’m feeling there is some shame they carry like they are responsible for whatever happened to them. You may have some issues with codependency (aka, making other peoples feelings your responsibility). Can you be your must true self with yourself? At the least? That will help you see more clearly how you tame yourself around others. Notice ways you even perform yourself to yourself.

Heart Chakra— to what are you keeping your heart closed? What steps can you take to feel safe and open?

Mantra: “I keep my heart open, willingly and joyfully, to the full spectrum experience of life.”

I figured a heart chakra card would come up which to me signals unresolved grief. This card again confirms what I channeled. It seems you need to really work on opening your heart and creating safety within yourself to be yourself, aka try to heal your self critical and judgmental ways. That voice that criticizes you in your head is not you! It’s programming from others and society. Start talking back to it. That will help heal your throat chakra and empower your inner child. I think the more you speak your truth—hearing you should journal, just write and see what comes through— the stronger your inner child will grow and that may allow you to be able to unlock some of those memories, should you want to!

I super hope this helps you! Thank you for letting me read for you and for your vulnerability in asking what you did. I think it’s so beautiful you want to connect with and help your inner child. Would love to hear how/if it connects and thanks so much for your patience! Sending you all the love sweet S. Mwah 😘

[lala-blahblah]

I absolutely cannot sit down and write a nice version of this bc my brain says no, but i would like to let you all know I'm thinking of a fanfic where older Edgeworth is moving back to the US (or japan, whichever universe you subscribe to) and runs into Nick in the store while buying mass produced art to hang on the walls of his new house.

And Nick is like "dear god do you want your house to look like a dentist's office. Please do better" (in a friendly way, they are too old for rivalry at this point) and so Nick invites Edgeworth to come over and take any of his old artwork from college, since it is just sitting in a portfolio in a closet somewhere. And Edgeworth agrees to come over and look through Nick's old stuff together. There are themes of 1) growing older and like reflecting on the past and 2) Nick's character trait of finding meaning in challenges vs Edgeworth's tendency to stick with what he does well. In my head I imagine that Nick was good at art and it came somewhat easily to him and that bored him, and he was drawn to law in part because it was hard and it excited him and made him want to try harder. And i think tying that in with fatherhood, like it being unexpected and hard but something he thrives at because he feels good when there's a challenge. Potentially also touching on how like, when he lost his badge he felt very listless and depressed because he wasn't being challenged anymore, there wasn't anything to drive him and motivate him. And I think Edgeworth would be impressed by seeing Nick's old pieces (I assume he hasn't seen much of his art before) and wondering why he didn't choose to pursue art further. He also thinks about how art had always put him off personally because he couldn't get it "right" right away, and on the other hand how the structure and logic of law came easily to him, which led him to become a lawyer. I think he measures his self worth by his success in his field because he never had the support to believe he had intrinsic value as a person and maybe wasn't so good at making emotional connections with people. So that big contrast between them is so interesting... I think Edgeworth would be jealous of Nick's bravery in pursuing something he was bad at without giving up and Nick would be jealous of Edgeworth's success in law, but in a subdued way as they've grown older.

A far as actual scenes in the fic, I think I would use Nick's art as a conduit for my own agenda to have them talk about topics that are of interest to me... I would like Edgeworth to feel out of his depth for once and for nick to be the confident one as he talks about something he is well versed in, and for edgeworth to have to face that discomfort and also be a little impressed intellectually with Nick. I think I would do that by having them look through some abstract art Nick did (my intro painting classes were all abstract so we could focus on color mixing and getting comfortable with the medium). Edgeworth compliments Nick on a painting with a bunch of colored squares in gradient clusters and then gets embarrassed when Nick tells him those were just color mixing swatches. Alternatively, in my mind they are both asexual and I think even though this feels like a hallmark cliche I would have Edgeworth flounder and be very embarrassed over Nick's old figure drawing piece. I feel like Nick would be like "no you don't understand it's all very professional and normal when we draw them, like it's just about learning the shape language" and Edgeworth would be like "this is very improper and I don't know how to react can we please not look at naked people!". I don't think i would do both, but something to upset the power dynamic for a moment would be interesting! Nick is always the awkward one I want to see him shine for just a moment enough for edgeworth to go "wait what... i've known him for so long but perhaps i don't really know him at all..."

I would want Edgeworth to end up taking a series of 3 canvases Nick did in an oil painting class that were still lifes of objects the teacher had set up around the classroom. I headcanon that Nick actually far preferred drawing people to objects and rebelled against the assignment by hiding his reflection in one of the objects in each drawing- the top of his head is hidden in an ornament on a christmas tree, his eye is reflected in the shine of a china vase, etc. So it's a little secret, and Edgeworth kind of likes that... it is sweet in a way to see a much younger Phoenix captured in time like that. Something Edgeworth will be reminded of when he sees the paintings but nobody else will catch onto

I would want to layer this with a fatherhood storyline... I think i would frame it as nick inviting edgeworth over to dinner with him and Trucy and Edgeworth stepping into this domestic family life as a visitor and witnessing how its transformed Nick, like seeing him from a different lens. I think after they pick out paintings and have dinner they sit around talking. Trucy had been sitting with them, earlier she showed off some magic tricks and gave Edgeworth a picture of hers from the fridge to add to his new art collection (it's a rainbow dolphin and a sea turtle wearing top hats. Nick says she's in her Lisa Frank era). But she's been quiet for awhile and Nick realizes she's fallen asleep and it's like 11. He's like, crap, i screwed up i should've paid attention and gotten her put to bed, I'm a bad father and I have an audience for this failure. And on top of that, I already failed at being a lawyer, no matter what I try I always disappoint everyone. It's an unexpected moment of vulnerability there... like he's seemed so put together and grown up to Edgeworth this whole time like a whole different person, but he's not a different person he just has different sides to him. And this moment is one where edgeworth can be like hey, no, you're a great dad, and I'm impressed by you and everything you achieved. And I think that could lead into vulnerability from Edgeworth about his relationship with his dad and how he misses him/how he feels like he hasn't really been loved by anyone since his dad died, and how Trucy is lucky to have someone like Nick in her life.

Nick excuses himself to carry Trucy to bed and Miles starts cleaning up the kitchen. I would give a moments pause here to talk about the strange intimacy of going through someone else's kitchen cabinets and drawers, you feel like a stranger there trying to put yourself into someone else's shoes to understand how they live in this space. Maybe he guesses the right drawer for the silverware first try and he feels a little spark of connection. like "we are different in many ways but we are alike enough that we look in the same place for our spoons". Details on the kitchen too about the kid safe plastic bowls and knives that indicate a child is part of the household, that the household has been built around the child, in fact. Edgeworth lives alone and I imagine things are kind of fancy for him (he's a man who wears a cravat so he probably has fine china right). It's completely different from this shabby mismatched cutlery that Nick has, but this kitchen has personality. Maybe he wouldn't mind having a kitchen like this so much. This is a hint at him being lonely, being included in this family unit just for a day has given him this curious sense of longing, for what he isn't sure... does he want kids? Does he want Nick? Does he just want to be part of a family? These are confusing questions and he would much rather not feel anything at all, but unfortunately it is late and he did have a glass of wine with dinner so emotions are Happening.

He hears Nick sigh tiredly as he comes into the kitchen, and Edgeworth starts to ask him where his tupperware is when suddenly Nick is wrapping his arms around him and Edgeworth is Very Tense because he's never good at knowing how to act in situations like this and he and Nick have never been on a hugging level before and he's not sure what this is even for. Then Nick is like "I keep thinking about what you said earlier, about feeling alone ever since your dad passed away. I didn't know, that's such a long time to feel alone. I don't want you to think you're on your own". Edgeworth relaxes a little bit because now he knows what the hug is for and what he's supposed to feel from it. Its very kind of Nick to worry but its unnecessary and he says so. He has colleagues he's friendly with and people from law school he keeps in touch with, he's alright. And Nick says he knows but he also knows it's difficult living the way they do, and what he means is single and in your thirties. Because everyone else is getting married or living with a long term partner or at the very least dating and their lives are focused on that relationship as the center of their being. And when you don't have that, not only is it harder to relate to the people around you but it is harder to feel like you matter in people's lives, because they all prioritize their partner before their friends. And maybe their situations aren't exactly the same (Nick has a daughter while Edgeworth lives alone) and maybe their choices were made for different reasons (Nick used to date and didn't mind it but didn't see a need to prioritize it. Edgeworth found himself unable to distinguish with certainty whether or not he was actually romantically interested in people, and rather than make the wrong choice he decided he would rule out error by choosing no one at all). But regardless, they both know first hand the isolation that comes with trying to carve a path for themselves that does not include a life partner in a world where everyone else comes in pairs. And Nick is reaching out across that emptiness saying hey, we might both be building different lives, but there's room for you to be a part of mine if you want.

Outloud, Nick says "Really, Miles. You aren't alone in this." and Edgeworth says "Well, Phoenix, neither are you". And he stands there and lets his friend hug him, and it doesn't feel like butterflies but it does feel solid and warm and good. And he doesn't even worry about whether he's supposed to let go by now or not, because it's nice, not being alone.

They stand there in comfortable silence for a long moment before Nick speaks again. "hey, remember when you used to hate me? And look at us now." Edgeworth turns his head sharply. "I never HATED you, Wright. I simply thought you were foolish and a waste of my time." He realizes a little too late that this is probably a rude thing to say to the person that just gave you a pep talk, but Nick just laughs, his head still resting on Edgeworth's shoulder. Looking at him from this angle, face almost fully hidden, Nick could be any age at all. It's easy to imagine for a moment that he's the same nervous version of himself that stood across from him in the courtroom for the first time all those years ago. The only thing breaking the illusion is the subtle streaks of silver that cross his temples. Not entirely sure why he does it, Edgeworth kisses the top of Nick's head. He feels odd about it the moment he does so, realizing it comes across not as a platonic or romantic action but as a gesture suited for a dog or pet of some kind. Nick looks up, looking confused but not displeased. "What was that for?" "It was a thank you I suppose". Miles steps away now, still uncomfortable with perceived failures even if those failures are just in social interactions, and begins to gather his things while Nick gets down a tupperware from a cabinet. "Thank you, for the dinner and for the paintings." Edgeworth continues. "I'd like to repay the favor once I get settled into the new house. Trucy's invited too, of course". As he says it, he realizes he genuinely is looking forward to seeing them again. Nick walks him to the apartment door and they say their goodbyes while Edgeworth tucks the paintings (and Trucy's dolphin drawing) under his arm.

He gets halfway down the hallway when he hears Nick calling after him. "Hey! Miles! Take an art class with me sometime" Newfound friendship or not, Edgeworth just looks at him in disdain. "what, so you can show off your superior art skills? No thank you, Wright" "No, for fun. You can make things of your own to hang on your walls. We can do something I've never done before so we're evenly matched. Like printmaking? Origami? Um, pottery?" Edgeworth bristles at the suggestions but takes a moment to acknowledge why he's feeling that way; again, it's that fear of failure. But he's enjoyed himself today and deep down he thinks it could be fun to try something new, not with the goal of being perfect at it but with the goal of spending time together. Nick surprised him today. Maybe he can surprise himself. "... I would consider pottery" Edgeworth admits. And Nick looks really happy about it. "Great. I'll book us a session then. It'll be fun, you'll see. Edgeworth shakes his head, but there's no malice behind it. "Have a good night, Phoenix" "You too. Get home safe Miles".

Edgeworth gets home a little before midnight and props the three canvases against the moving boxes still stacked up in the foyer. Tomorrow, he'll figure out where he wants to hang them. Right now though, he walks over to the bare fridge and carefully pins up Tracy's dolphin drawing. There's a lot more work to do, but it's already starting to feel like home.

[owlwinter8]

I bound “The Lives Worth Saving” by cywsaphyre, my favorite Naruto fic!! Despite having been abandoned well over a decade ago, this fic still has a warm place in my heart. It was the first fanfic I really became obsessed with and even after all these years, it’s amazing how much of the story I've been able to remember beat-for-beat 🧡 Cover art creds: 頂上 by @my_nameisyoon

[antigonenikk]

modern day liebgott is an uber driver who exclusively plays chief keef on his busted out speakers. his car is a 2004 toyota corrolla that smells like cigarette smoke and axe body spray. the rubber is peeling off of two of the doors. the left blinker does not work. a door handle has been mysteriously ripped off and the windows wont roll down. he has ten parking tickets he refuses to pay off and does not care about right of way. if hes delivering your food for uber eats you can count on the fact that he has eaten some of your fries. in spite of all of this he pulls more bitches than all of his friends combined.