#incorrect selfship quotes

[zombieplaguedoc]

Estonia: *does something on the computer just as his brother in law Jerome walks in* Alright, my account is almost complete, now I just need to think of a password.

Jerome:

Jerome: *smashes keyboard a few times*

*Your password is now strong enough*

Estonia:

Estonia: That works too.

[v-sansings]

ENA and Moony. ENA's trying. I believe in her

platonic f/o: look me in the eyes and tell me you're not in love with s/i romantic f/o: *looking lovingly at s/i across the room* romantic f/o: i'm not in love with s/i platonic f/o: that was not anywhere near my eyes

[selfship-quotes]

S/I, pointing a camera at F/O: There they are, my sweet baby.

F/O, holding a cigarette and a beer: What-?

[angelthedrummer]

Celebrity or Royal F/O: I won’t date a fan. Too many of them are crazy obsessed weirdos who you could never have a real relationship with.

S/I: *Walks into the room*

Celebrity or Royal F/O: *Blushes* Okay, with ONE exception.

[l0v3sickl0s3r]

s/i: hey f/o, i made us some friendship bracelets!

f/o: oh. well i’m not really a jewelry person…

s/i: you don’t have to wear it.

f/o: no i’m gonna wear it forever fuck off

proship dni >:(

[rosieshipper]

Stan: *picking up a toy phone* I’m gonna call the bogeyman

Rose: *trying to grab the phone from him while he’s dialing the numbers* No no! Call Santa!

Stan: I’m not calling Santa, I’m calling the boogeyman. Yeah eat her toes cause she’s bad

Rose: Noooo I’ve been good

Stan: Yeah. Take her fingers and toes

Rose: *starts wailing*

Ford: Really, Stanley? Must you torment her?

Stan: What? It was funny!

Tags: @astralshipper @arickaandherfictionalothers @shibasparklez @wolfofthedead

[platonic-fo-quotes]

S/I, T-posing in the doorway: Greetings, [familial f/o].

Familial f/o, not looking up from their coffee: Good morning, problem child.

[selfshipping-haven]

S/I: I don't know if I can take a nap here. There's no lumbar support.

F/O: Then get off of my lap.

S/I: Never.

[daily-selfship-questions]

Which of your F/O(s) are the type to ask "Does the cheeseburger come with only cheese or does it have meat on it too?"

[shyvien]

Y’know the pen!s game? The one where you just say pen!s louder and louder until someone chickens out?

Imagine being like “so there’s this human world game…” to the OM! boys

I feel like Dia would be hella into it, giggling like the goofy idiot he is, ecstatic to be trying out such silly human entertainment. The risk would be p!ssing off Lucifer who’d be within earshot of the yelling game

[inkwell-selfships]

Gender reveal:

Paul: I’m the dad Julia: And I’m the mom Both: And we think its gonna be a boy Ted: I’m the uncle and I think your gonna be nonbinary  Charlotte: I’m the aunt and I know the gender  Wiggly & Wilbur: Hi were the gay uncles and we think it's gonna be a girl Nibbly: I’m your cousin and I think your gonna be a stick

[zombieplaguedoc]

2p America: Hey dad?

Davy Jones: Aye?

Me: Can a person breathe inside a washing machine while it's still on?

Davy Jones:

Davy Jones: Where's Hawaii?

BONUS VERSION:

Hawaii: Hey Aunt Alcina?

Lady Dimitrescu: Yes?

Me: Can a person breathe inside a washing machine while it's still on?

Lady Dimitrescu:

Lady Dimitrescu: Where's Alaska?

[yandereloveraw]

☀️🔪 Yandere Delight Intimidation🔪☀️

-------------------------------------------------------

Yan! Delight: What the hell do you think you were doing there?

Y/N: Wha-

Yan! Delight: Shhh. No talking, just listening. I'm giving you one warning. Nova is off limits. If I see you try something like that again, I will come for you. Are we clear?

[Source: Sao Abridged]

[selfship-quotes]

F/O: *turns on the kitchen light*

S/I: *sitting at the table, eating bread*

F/O: It’s four in the morning.

S/I: Turn the light back off.

[angelthedrummer]

F/O: S/I, please go to bed a bit earlier tonight. I don’t want you to lose any sleep.

S/I: Awe, alright! I’ll see you tomorrow.

F/O: Stays up until 4:00 AM doing whatever it is they do

[labselkie]

i’m having feelings

the replies to sky r jjj and probably an osborn