#incorrect sdv quotes
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incorrect-stardew-quotes · 8 months ago
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sdv-iq · 7 months ago
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Alex: I need a doctor’s appointment
Maru: Okay, does 10 tomorrow work?
Alex: No, I don’t need that many
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deluzionalfantisea · 1 year ago
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Sam: You fucking chainsmoker
Sebastian: Ew I don’t like that band
Abigail: No this is an intervention
Sebastian: For the chainsmokers? Yeah you should intervene with their shit music
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Farmer: "I will now torture you." Shane: "Kinky." Farmer: "I think you are sweet and beautiful." Shane: "Wait." Farmer: "You deserve to be cared for as much as you care for others." Shane: "No." Farmer: "Your feelings and needs are valid and deserve to be heard." Shane: "I need a safeword!"
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bookishnewt · 2 years ago
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The Farmer: I would do anything for money.
*later*
The Farmer, covered in blood: THE STATEMENT STILL STANDS!
———————
Who’s blood is it? You decide.
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sam-himbocanons · 2 years ago
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seb: sometimes i like to put random things in sam's food and see if he notices seb: you wouldn't believe the shit he eats anyway
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seb: i got a burrito for you sam: oh thanks! sam: *bites off a chunk of creamy nut butter and beef* what woul' i do wifout you shebby this is delicioush seb: want some juice with that? sam: sure! wow you're so kind today seb *slurps suspiciously chunky orange juice* sam: if i didn't know any better i would think you're up to something! sam: wait sam: these aren't poisoned or anything right?
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*horrendous noises coming from sam's bathroom* abby: excuse me why is sam shitting out of both ends seb: must've been something he ate :)
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marce-mallow · 2 years ago
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Alex: I just saw two primary school kids in a fistfight, so obviously I had to step in.
Penny: Oh, good for y—
Alex: They didn’t stand a chance >:]
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theambivalentagender · 2 years ago
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Emily: Are you the big spoon or little spoon?
Shane: I’m a knife
Farmer, from the pool table: He’s the little spoon
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timdrakesbussy · 5 months ago
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ryliith · 5 months ago
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It's all Joja's fault !
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incorrect-stardew-quotes · 9 months ago
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Alex: What are your pronouns?
Farmer: They/them. Why?
Alex: Oh, thanks. I'm gonna go home and complain about you later and I don't wanna get it wrong.
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theambivalentagender · 2 years ago
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We don't get enough of the JojaCo coworkers.
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sdv-iq · 1 year ago
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Pierre: So let me get this straight-
Sam: More like let me run this bi you
Abigail: Let’s see how this pans out
Sebastian: Let me ace-ess the situation
The Farmer: I’m gay
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terrifiedscarecrow · 4 months ago
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these were revealed to me in my delusions
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iwouldmovetostardewvalley · 2 years ago
Conversation
Farmer: "Look, I just need to know how to get out of the sewers."
Krobus: "There is no way out!"
Farmer: "*Gasp!*"
Krobus: "Just kidding. The door's right over there."
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moeblob · 5 months ago
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Someone pointed out "Alex is the glass half full guy and Shane is the glass half empty but he's working on it guy" and so true.
I think Alex is a finger guns kind of guy and I have nothing to support this claim but I'm gonna stand my ground on it. (Alex also just kinda lost on if the blushing or the tearing up is more important and did HE PERSONALLY mess up saying this because he sure as heck doesn't know.)
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