#incorrect lbp quotes

[x--willow-chan--x]

(The secret word is "pizza"!) Vex: Okay, an Italian dish! Newton Pud: Pasta! Vex: No, it's round and flat! Newton Pud: Calzone! Vex: No! It's flat, and has pepperoni... Newton Pud: Flat calzone! Vex: Grr, no! Listen- Newton Pud: Mean Italian guy? Vex: No, it's FOOD! It's round- Newton Pud: I-talian donut hole! Vex: Grrr... Newton Pud: Hmm... Crankypants! Vex: (growls angrily) Newton Pud: A grizzly bear! Vex: (growls even more) Newton Pud: Sea monkeys! (buzzer sounds) That was hard.

[thehyperrequiem]

Avalon: What do you think Herbert will do for a distraction?

Clive: He’ll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. That’s what I would do.

*Building explodes and several car alarms go off*

Clive:...or he could do that.

[sabrina136666]

I made a incorrect quote in the discord server

And then drew it

[littlebigkatamari]

SABA/LBP Incorrect Quotes #6:

Marlon: Say... What do you got there, champ?

Newton: (Pushing the Titan teat tin) ...New invention.

[incorrectlbp]

[c0smiccom3t]

Vex and Stitcher’s incorrect quotes Part 2! (ft. Newton as a henchman to Vex and a sidekick to stitcher)

Vex: I know you snuck out last night, Stitcher. Newton: Play dumb! Stitcher: Who's Stitcher? Newton: NOT THAT DUMB!!!

Vex: If Stitcher and I were drowning, who would you save? Newton: You two can’t swim? Stitcher: It’s a hypothetical question, Newton! who would you save? Newton: my time and effort.

Vex: Are you the big spoon or the little spoon? Stitcher: I'm a knife. Newton, from across the room: He’s the little spoon.

Vex: I really like this whole ‘good guy, bad guy’ thing you guys have going on. Stitcher: It’s not an act, it’s just that I’m mean and Newton isn’t

Vex: I trust Stitcher. Newton: You think he knows what he’s doing? Vex: I wouldn't go that far.

Vex, negotiating with Stitcher: We have Newton. Give us ten thousand dollars and they will be returned to you unharmed Newton: Whoa, whoa, wait, you think I’m only worth ten thousand dollars? Vex: Newton: MAKE IT ONE MILLION– Vex: NEWTON STOP

Vex: Newton, keep an eye on Stitcher today. He’s going to say something to the wrong person and get punched. Newton: Sure, I’d love to see Stitcher get punched. Vex: Try again. Newton, sighing: I will stop Stitcher from getting punched.

Vex: If I die, my funeral is going to be the biggest party ever and you’re all invited Stitcher: If? Newton: Great, the only party I’ve ever been invited to and they might not even die.

Vex: What do you think Stitcher will do for a distraction? Newton: He’ll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. That’s what I would do. *Building explodes and several car alarms go off* Newton: ... or he could do that.

Vex: Come on, I wasn’t that drunk last night. Newton: You were flirting with Stitcher. Vex: So what? he's my partner. Newton: You asked him if he was single. Vex: Newton: And then you cried when he said he wasn’t

Vex: We need a distraction. Newton: Is anyone here good at jumping up and down and making weird noises? Stitcher, whispering: My time has come

Vex: Here’s a fun Christmas idea. We hang mistletoe, but instead of kissing, you have to FIGHT whoever else is under it. Newton: Vex no. Stitcher: Mistlefoe. Newton: Please stop encouraging him.

Vex: HELP! I TOLD STITCHER I’D COOK DINNER TONIGHT BUT I CAN’T COOK! Newton, pouring milk directly into the cereal bag: And you thought I could help?

Vex, driving Newton and Stitcher: So how was your day? Stitcher: We almost got surprise adopted! Vex: What? Newton: We almost got kidnapped. Vex: Oh, okay. Vex: *slams on the breaks* WAIT WHAT?!

Vex: How's the sexiest person here~? Newton: I don't know, how are they~? Vex, flustered: I- Stitcher, from across the room: I'm doing great, thanks!

Vex: I’m kind of crushing on someone, but I’m worried about telling you who it is, because you’re not going to like it Newton: Just rip the bandage off. Vex: It’s Stitcher. Newton: Put the bandage back on.

Vex: Newton, can I talk to you for a second? Newton: Yeah, what’s up? Lemme guess. You and Stitcher are having problems and you want me to teach you how to kiss? Vex: What? No, stop that. I know how to kiss. I’ve read books.

[incorrectlbp]

It's not an incorrect quote but it needs to be here

“I’m allergic to drowning! I come out in these big… big… well death…”

— Newton Pud

[x--willow-chan--x]

Vex: (to Newton) I'm gonna punch your face in the face. Newton: (was worried) Vex: (slowly) IN YOUR FACE! Newton: No! (Vex punches Newton's bulb)

[x--willow-chan--x]

Sackboy: We gotta keep it quiet. (Newton's tummy begins to gurgle) Newton Pud: Tell my parents I love them. Sackboy: (puts shoves a riceball into Newton's mouth, puts on some earplugs) Hit the dirt! (ducks for cover and covers his ears) (Newton Pud lets out a huge burp)

[x--willow-chan--x]

Newton Pud: (to Clive) Which door?! There's more than one! Sackgirl is behind the door shaped like this! Avalon: I told you!!! (Avalon, Clive and Sackboy start fighting) (Newton Pud face palms during their argument)

[x--willow-chan--x]

Vex's opinion on screaming YouTubers:

Vex, pointing at his lap top: There were screams in there!

[x--willow-chan--x]

Vex in the bath: [notices Newton Pud walking into the halls needing to use the bathroom] What are those Neanderthals up to? Don't they know I'm busy spoiling myself?

[Newton opens the door while Vex is bathing]

Vex: [starts screaming thrice] [stops screaming then panting]

[x--willow-chan--x]

Newton Pud: HOLY FISH PASTE!!! What is that?

Sackgirl: (about the rice ball she made) That's the appetizer.

[x--willow-chan--x]

Vex: Running out of ideas, Clive. Think of something that would make me look good. Clive Handforth: (to Newton) Newt, BE CAREFUL WITH THAT!! (sighs) Why do I care, the orbs aren't candy. Newton Pud: Sackbulb of helms! Dive! Dive!!! (eats 3 titan spirits) Clive Handforth: Newton, what have you done? Open it. Open it! Newton Pud: (opens his mouth wide) Ahhhhh... Clive Handforth: You have know better than to eat the titan spirits. Just think what you did for your digestive tract. (pulls the titan spirits out of Newton Pud's mouth) Newton Pud: I can't wait to see that part, Clive! Clive Handforth: Yes, well. Let's see and say we did, Newton.

[thehyperrequiem]

Random Incorrect Quotes - Last Friday Night with the Alliance

Clive: Let me show you a picture from last night that really upset me 

Herbert: Okay, but in my defense, Avalon bet me 50 cents I couldn’t drink all that shampoo man. 

Clive: That’s not what I wanted to- you drank SHAMPOO?!

Herbert: 🫧

[thehyperrequiem]

[Sackboy and Newton playing around with arm farts]

Avalon: Hey, guys. Come on. What are y’all? Three years old? This is how a man does it.

Larry: You chaps are so gross! Besides…THIS is how you do it!

Herbert: Hey, folks! Get a load of this.

*Farts so loud it could clear up the room, good grief Herbert, what have you been eating?*

Larry: Dr. Higginbotham! We were using our arms! Herbert: Oh…Excuse me man…