#incase anyone was wondering who our POV is

[gladerwolfstarkimagines]

Imagine coming out to your boyfriend Bolin as asexual and him being completely understanding and supportive

Being rich kids both Prince Wu and Asami loved throwing big parties as an excuse to get the gang together again and this time it was Asami’s turn. Her house (if you could call it a house) was decorated extravagantly and filled with all the friends you’d made over the years. The cute part was the gang would always gravitate together no matter how big the party was and tonight was no exception...well apart from Bolin, he’d been cornered by the Biefongs but you knew they’d release him eventually. Meanwhile you all chatted and caught up on what you’d missed in the months you’d been apart. “How are you and Korra?” you asked Asami and she smiled blushing “we’re prefect, she’s perfect, i’m so happy”. Asami blushed as Korra beside her smirked and you grinned as Asami pushed her. Korra smiled adoringly at Asami before turning the question to you “What about you and Bolin, how are you two?” she asked and you smiled “we’re great! I know it’s only been 4 months but it’s been perfect so far!”. Asami and Korra both smiled “that’s great y/n! You two really deserve each other, you’re both so kind and adorable”. You blushed and went to thank her when Wu spoke. “Not to mention what a hot couple you make! I don’t know how you get anything done when you’re alone together”. You paused confused “what?”. Wu smiled “I was just making a joke y/n about you and Bolin being a physically attractive couple...I was just being crude” he clarified but you were still confused. “He was talking about your sex life with my little brother” Mako said angrily and Wu looked away from the fire bender’s glare. You immediately felt uncomfortable, your throat went dry and your heart raced. You’d been fine until that comment and now you felt like you were hiding something. You smiled along with the others and waited a few minutes until you could excuse yourself without looking suspicious. “Sorry I’m not feeling great I need some air” you said rushing away. You walked outside Asami’s house and breathed in the night air. Everyone just assumed you’d been physical together but you hadn’t. That didn’t bother you in the slightest, you loved Bolin so much, you just didn’t express yourself physically and Bolin hadn’t pushed you to, so it had been fine. But when other people made comments or had expectations about your relationship it worried you and made you realise just how much your sexuality differed from the norm and made you question your relationship. If others were making assumptions about your sex life surely Bolin was too and wondering why you hadn’t ever initiated anything with him. You should’ve told Bolin before you started dating you were asexual you supposed, but you hadn’t been sure before and honestly hadn’t even noticed the lack of sex in your relationship until Wu made his comment. To you your relationship was full but maybe Bolin didn’t see it that way and that worried you. It wasn’t like you’d lied to Bolin, you’d both been happy so you felt no need to discuss the intricate details of your relationship and considering Bolin seemed content you’d been happy to leave it but now you knew you couldn’t do that much longer. Bolin might be unhappy with how your relationship was and because you hadn’t asked you didn’t know. Given how much Bolin didn’t like to upset people that could be a real possability. You knew he was too sweet to pressure you by asking but that didn’t mean you should just ignore him and leave him in the dark. You should tell him and as much as that terrified you it had to be done.

You found Bolin with the Beifong twins and managed to catch his attention right away. “Y/n” he smiled “are you okay? Mako said you seemed pale earlier”. “Kind of but can we talk? There’s something I need to tell you”. Bolin nodded “of course” and took your hand leading you into a side room which was empty. He shut the door and turned to you. He could tell you were nervous so didn’t push you and just waited. “I’m asexual” you said simply and Bolin frowned “you’re what?”. You coughed the explanation all prepared in your head “I’m asexual, that means I do not experience sexual attraction to other people, I can feel romantic attraction and can function sexually from a biological perspective but I do not desire or feel the need for sexual intimacy with others”. You finished your definition and Bolin nodded along “okay so...what does that mean for us, do you, still like me?”. You nodded your head “of course! I still experience romantic desire and attraction and I am attracted to you romantically just not sexually”. Bolin nodded his head still processing it all “So you like me, you’re interested in me and you’re happy for this relationship to progress just not sexually?”. You nodded your head hating the awkwardness and were aprehensive of Bolin’s reaction. “I don’t experience sexual feelings so for me sex is not necessarily enjoyable or needed in a relationship but I wanted to tell you incase sex is something you need in a relationship and if it is, that’s okay! It just means we’re not compatible”. Bolin could see your body language and how nervous you looked and cautiously, giving you time to move away if you wanted to, put his hand over yours. “Y/n I don’t need to be physical with you to know I love you, I know sex is a way some people show their love but that doesn’t have to be us, I love you and I am happy not pushing our physical activites further”. Your eyes shot to Bolin’s and you searched his face to see if he was being honest “are you sure because Bolin this won’t work if you’re not. This isn’t some phase I’ll grow out of and if sex is something you need then we shouldn’t be together for the sake of it”. Bolin shook his head “I’m not lying y/n and i understand this is who you are and I love it about you too. This isn’t something i’m giving up for you, I’m not losing anything because I have you! Having you is the best thing in my life and I don’t need anything more from you than you’ve already given me”. You smiled and didn’t even realise you were crying until Bolin wiped your tears away “y/n did I say something wrong?”. “No” you smiled “you did the opposite”. Bolin grinned and hugged you. You wrapped yourself in the hug feeling so safe and loved in Bolin’s arms. You felt whole and secure, you felt validated. You pulled away and smiled at Bolin “thank you” you sighed. Bolin shook his head “you don’t need to thank me, i’m not doing anything nobel or worthy of appreciation, i love you and we have decided this works for us, that is all, no gratitude required” Bolin said simply and you nodded taking his hand again. “Thank you for feeling comfortable enough to tell me” Bolin said soflty “I’m pleased you felt like you could confide in me about this”. You nodded “well I love you i wanted you to know”. Bolin always physically brightenned when you told him you loved him and now was no different. Bolin grinned happily and kissed your hand. “I love you too y/n, so much”. You smiled and nodded resting your head against his “I know and I feel like the luckiest girl in the world”. “Well we should put on the lottery becase I feel like the luckiest boy in the world” Bolin retorted and you laughed outloud. Bolin grinned seeing you smile and looked at you carefully “are you ready to go back to the party or do you want more time?”. “No” you said wiping your face “I’m okay, i feel a lot better even though i’m sure my makeups run, do I look okay?”. Bolin looked at you and grinned “you look beautiful”. You blushed and took Bolin’s hand stepping back into the party.

----

My first asexual fanfiction!!! I was so happy to write something from an asexual pov and chose Bolin because I think he’s one of the most open minded characters on the show (and he is my dream man but anyway...). 

Side note  - this is not to say this is how every asexual relationship/person dating an asexual individual has to act or feel! I am asexual and this is something from expereince I know works for me but that doesn’t mean I speak for the whole community so please don’t pidgeon hole anyone whose asexual as having to be this way. I just thought it would be nice to see some ace reperesentation and to portray asexual relationships in a positive happy light and to show asexuals can be in loving romantic relationships!!!

Also I hope this isn’t necessary but no asexual hate is welcome or will be tolerated here. Being asexual is beautiful and valid and we deserve treating as such! :)

[loudlyunladylike]

-Interest Ask-

Ok I said thr Christmas SMP ask would be my last one for today but then I remembered more Outsiders stuff so... yeah that was a lie.

So Apo has recently started putting their POV on YouTube and released kinda a trailer for it which I'll link, here:

https://youtube.com/shorts/jXb1_RbRIA0?feature=share

So there's another POV to watch now! Now Apo, Owen, Bekyamon, Squidney and Graecie all have YT series on Outsiders if anyone ever wants to check Outsiders out! And also I found someone who downloaded Apo's old Outsider streams, so now people can go back and watch his old streams!! Here's the link to the playlist:

https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLcoN5T9q4cmqu-taxCG6ZxOf_vgE57pqj

There's also a site called PogU.live where you can go and watch deleted streams! It only works in desktop mode though. It seems safe enough and I haven't got any viruses yet so ���. Maybe have an ad blocker on or malware protector just incase.

But back to the trailer!! It such a good trailer for the series and you can get a glimpse of the acting and the setting!! The Maze you see is the Maze they have! Its huge compared to them, and it really makes them seem so tiny. So insignificant. And the acting!!! The way Apo really sounds scared, how angry and distraught Owen sounds! Like cc!Owen's acting in that scene is incredible, holy shit. Also that's a very iconic line for Outsiders, it's basically our "Are we the Bad Guys" or, more accurately, "We had some laughs. It was fun. Ya know, all good things must come to an end eventually." The quote basically makes Outsiders fans very sad. It's our "Fallen Down", where someone says it and we just start crying.

Also the music playing is one Apo played during lore, which is very rude of them. I wonder if they put that in there on purpose to mess with those who watched the lore on his Twitch already.

But yeah, now we have an Apo POV series!! Which is really cool and there's only a few episodes so it maybe easier to watch the couple he has then just watch new episodes as they come out. Just a suggestion though, no one has to!

ask sent: december 20th

Oooooooo that all sounds very exciting!!! Like straight up every factor of this ask made me go oh👀 very very cool. And YO?? Just watched that Trailer and it looks SICK!! Big agree on all the stuff you said like the maze looking so big and the people looking so small! and the acting!! actually gave me chills phew, sounds heartbreaking ouch. The “to watch” list may in fact be growing uh oh👀

[link to trailer] 

[link to playlist]

[thefemalethatwrites]

Take Care (Damian Wayne x Reader)

Request: No

Prompt: You and Damian have feeling a for each other, but neither of you know. There’s also a Charity event to go to.

Relationship: Damian Wayne/Robin x Reader

Warning: Cursing, Fighting, Blood? Injuries

Word Count: 1849

A/N: Heyo! I’m not dead!! I’ve just got two jobs a BF who I adore 🥰 Send in requests cause I need to get back into my writing cause I miss you guys!!!

Damian and Reader are 16/17

~~~

(Y/N)'s POV

"Morning" Damian greeted as he sat next to me in the classroom, jolting me awake,

"I swear I wasn't asleep" I mumbled quickly followed by a yawn,

"Why are you so tired?" He questioned,

"I had to do several projects these past few nights because other people in my group didn't do and left it for me to do" I explained, he grunted

"Inconsiderate di-"

"Good morning class" Mr Harrington greeted cutting Damian off as he entered the classroom, there was several grumbles in response, "As many of you know tonight is the night of the charity party that we will be fundraising for the unfortunate people of Gotham" he announced, some people cheered while others groaned, I just sighed resting my head on my hand, while Damian rolled his eyes.

***

"Come on baby" Nate cooed at Leanne pinning her against the lockers, which she didn't look comfortable about,

"Nate, I've told you no" Leanne retorted as she shoved him backwards,

"Who the fuck do you-"

"Back the fuck up before you get shown up" I threatened pulling him off her and standing in between the two, he glared at me with his nostrils flared, "Go on try it. I dare you" I sneered, he huffed and stormed off, I turned to Leanne "You okay?" I asked, she nodded and gave me a small smile,

"Yeah thanks" she replied before we made our way to lunch.

"So we're all going to meet up at mine and get ready then go together" Gia stated,

"What time?" I asked as I sat with them at the lunch table, the girls all looked at each other,

"Sorry (Y/N), I completely forgot to tell you that there's not enough room in the limousine for you to join" Gia replied,

"Oh, that's fine. I'll find another way to get there" I commented, truthfully I didn't have a clue how I was going to get there, this was a punch to the gut that hurt a lot, "I'll see you there" I said getting up and leaving the hall, I sat on a wall outside the school and sighed looking up to the grey sky,

"What's up?" Damian's voice hit my ears, I turned to him giving him a slight smile,

"Gia's just been nice enough to inform me that I don't have a lift to the charity party..." I trailed off, he sat next to me,

"Why do you hang around with them girls? They're nothing but selfish and they use you" he sighed,

"How do they use me?" I scoffed,

"For protection, you're the only girl in school that's willing to kick anyone's ass" he stated, I hummed,

"Willing? I can kick anyone's ass" I retorted making him chuckle before it fell silent, "(Y/N)" he said gaining my attention, he brushed a strand of hair behind my ear, "Would you care to travel with me to the party? Not as a date, just as companions" he questioned, I smiled and nodded

"I'd be more than willing to join you" I answered, he nodded

"Very well, Pennyworth will be picking us up after school to take us to yours for you to grab your things then you can come get ready at the manor with me and stay overnight too" he asserted, I nodded in agreement.

***

I was sat in front of the vanity desk in the guest room that I'd been given for the night,

"My little Dami is growing up!" A older male cooed,

"Let go of me Grayson!" Damian hissed,

"Oh come on Demon, she's not a bad catch" Another male commented making my eyes widen, they were talking about me,

"Todd I won't hesitate to kill you" Damian threatened,

"(Y/N) (L/N), grade As and a few Bs all across the board, however she does have a bad track record of fighting" Another male voice chimed in,

"You searched her?!" Damian yelled,

"It's the first female you've brought home and we wanted to make sure she was good" the same male replied,

"You has no right Drake!" Damian snapped before a lot of commotion occurred, I sighed and exited the room to see the four boys all together,

"What exactly are you all doing?" I questioned, they all straightened themselves out,

"Nothing" they replied, I hummed as I approached them I looked them all up and down, "I'm going to take a guess and say you're his brothers. Dick Grayson. Jason Todd and Timothy Drake" I commented, their jaws fell open making me chuckle, "You're not the only one who did a background check" I winked before entering the room again.

***

There was a knock on the door,

"Yes?" I called out, Dick came in through the door

"Damian is wondering if you're ready" he asked, I nodded placing my lipstick in my clutch before following him, I was wearing a emerald mid-thigh dress with a trail along with silver clutch and heels, as I made my way down the stairs Damian's jaw fell open causing his brothers to chuckle, Bruce closed it for him as I approached them,

"Wow..." he breathed out,

"What?" I asked,

"You're beautiful" he whispered, I felt heat rush to my cheeks, Alfred cleared his throat

"If we're to arrive on time for your party I suggest we leave now" he informed, we both nodded and hooked up before making our way to the car.

***

I was stood with the girls at the side of the dance floor as we watched Gia dance with some random guy from our year,

"So what's the deal between you and Damian?" Leanne questioned, I raised an eyebrow towards her,

"What do you mean?" I questioned,

"It's obvious you like him-" I tuned Melody out as I noticed Gia stumbling all over the place,

"How much has Gia had to drink?" I asked,

"Oh no don't try changing the subject" Lizzie retorted,

"No seriously look" I mentioned how the guy was dragging Gia out of the dance, "Come on" I asserted as I lead the group though the dance floor and the back corridors before finding the guy hovering over Gia who was almost unconscious on the bed, and he began to unbuckled his pants, "Get off her!" I snap as I pulled him back and right hooked him on to the ground, "Get her out of here" I ordered the girls, before making my way over to the guy and kicking him in the stomach, multiple times as the girls escorted Gia out of the room, moments later I heard multiple footsteps and was tackled on to the bed away from the guy, my eyes widened as Nate pinned me to the bed, I gritted my teeth as his face hovered over mine, before I swiftly head butted him making him let go and get free from his hold, I put my back against a corner of the room as a group of Nate and his friends surrounded me.

***

I made my way to the back garden of where the party was being held as all the girls were sat there,

"(Y/N) oh-"

"I can't believe you!" Gia snapped cutting off Leanne,

"What do you mean? I've just saved you're ass" I retorted,

"No what you did was cock block me! I was finally about to get some but you came and destroyed it!" She screamed, my eyes widened in horror,

"Cock block?! You was about to be raped! Gang raped at that by Nate and his low life friends!" I yelled, she slapped me across the face making the girls gasp and me stop in my tracks, "You know what? Fuck you all! All you do is use me! Just for protection but then when I do, I'm in the wrong. I can't win with you bitches cause you're all stuck up each other's ass!" I snapped before walking away,

"Don't walk away from me! You need me!" Gia called after me making me laugh,

"No you need me!" I called back before sticking my middle finger up to them, I sat on a wall and gingerly held my dominant hand as it was now starting to throb a lot, I heard footsteps approach me,

"There you are" Damian sighed in relief as he stopped in front of me, "(Y/N) what's up? Look at me" he pleaded, I did so and his eyes widened in shock before they filled with rage, "Who did this?" He growled clenching his fist,

"It doesn't matter" I replied lowering my head again,

"Yes it does! You've got cuts, bruises and scrapes all over your face, your hand is swollen meaning you've either dislocated or broken something. You're a woman for fuck sake you shouldn't be in this state!" He snapped, I stood up

"What does being a woman have to do with me being in this state?! Is it because I'm a woman I'm not allowed to fight?! Well tough shit! It's who I am! And I said it doesn't matter because I dealt with it. They're all laying unconscious in a back room somewhere" I snapped before throwing myself back down, he sighed before crouching down to me, taking a hold of the non-dominant hand,

"I didn't mean to insult you, I just hate seeing you like this, it's not how a woman like yourself should be treated" he said,

"Oh yeah? And how am I supposed to be treated?" I asked,

"Like a queen" he answered making me scoff, "Let me finish. You do so much for everyone else that you never take care of yourself. That's why you need someone who's always going to put you first" he explained, I hummed,

"You know anyone?" I questioned as a joke, he nodded and smiled

"In fact I do. Stand up" he replied making my eyes widen as he helped me stand up, "Close your eyes" he ordered, I raised an eyebrow but did so anyway, a few moments passed before something was pressed against my lips making my eyes shoot open to see Damian kissing me, I smiled into it, closing my eyes again, wrapping my arms around his neck as he placed his hands on my waist pulling me closer, we broke apart to catch our breaths, "That wasn't the reaction I was expecting..." Damian commented, I chuckled,

"I like you a lot, incase you didn't realise. Have done for a while..." I confessed lowering my head, he cupped my face lifting it back up as he ran a thumb over my cheek,

"I've liked you a lot more than friends for a long time, (Y/N) but I've always been too scared to reveal my true emotions towards you, due to our friendship" he rambled, I smiled and kissed his palm, "Pennyworth is out front waiting for us. I'll have him look at your wounds when we get home. Then I'll let you in on a secret..." he trailed off, I nodded and took his hand with my non-dominant one as we left the venue.

[benjaminjofaiho]

The Captain Next Door Ch.3

Summary: You’re a doctor who also just so happens to be a fan fiction writer. You love lots of fandoms but Captain America is by far your fave, so what happens when you get a new job, move to Brooklyn and realize that the brownstone you bought is right next door to Captain America? Obviously shenanigans ensue.

Warnings: Swearing. Light Mentions of NSFW material.

AN:  I’m sorry for the super late update. I am actually in London right now for vacation so I thought it would only be right for me to post an update. Hopefully this will be the last time I have to take a hiatus like this. Thank you for all your reblogs, comments and likes. Your feedback is always welcome and I love hearing from y’all. It’s worth noting that I do not care for or abide by the timeline, there are some people mentioned that haven’t technically been brought together yet [ As per Winter Soldier ] but I did it anyway.  P.S. I do not currently have a beta and the ‘f’ and ‘u’ keys on my keyboard are messed up so incase you see repeating letters anywhere they aren’t supposed to be feel free to let me know.

“It’s my genuine pleasure to be here Y/N, and please, Steven is far too formal, ma’am. Steve is just fine. Thank you for your befriending Sam-” Steve started.

           “Samuel! Samuel, yes, Sam, Samuel. Samuel Wilson. Wilson comma Samuel on government documents right Samuel?” You looked at him like a fire that needed to be put out. Grabbing the bottle from Captain America who was, literally standing in your foyer looking like all of the things that your fanfiction fantasies could hope for. However  there was a look of something on his face. It was an emotion you couldn’t place. He looked down and rubbed his strong arms over his neck and your eyes jumped to his biceps.

           “Please,” you said out of breath, and gesturing to your living room “make yourself at home, I just need Samuel’s help in my office with that thing I told you about earlier. Remember Samuel?” Grabbing his collar like a drowning child. Steve quirked a brow.

           Laughing and prying your fingers from his shirt “Aww come on Doc we’re back at Samuel? I thought we were friends Y/N-”

           “Samuel PLEASE” you screeched wringing your hands around the wine bottle.

           “Alright, alright fineeee I’m coming Doc” He rolls his eyes and juts his thumb out while sticking out his thumb at you and Steve laughs a little. You both start up the stairs and to the left into your office. Closing the door and turning swiftly and taking in a sharp breath you prepare to give Sam the haranguing of his life.

           “Samuel Wilson!  If that even is your name!” You accused, pushing his chest “How could you not tell me?! You know I’m basically in love with him right? Why did you not tell me you were roommates with Captain Fucking America?”

           “Listen Doc, I’m going to be honest with you. Getting to know you these past few weeks, we have our fun but I’ve never seen you flustered… and I’m a little bit of a prankster. Plus the added bonus that whenever you talk about how great the Avengers are you always focus on Cap really made me want to be able to have a front seat to this reveal without you being able to prepare yourself and be composed. ”

           Unable to help it your shoulders start to shake lightly and then uncontrollably and before you knew it you were open mouth laughing. “Ok, ok. You got me but I just want you to know that you’ve started a prank war. You brought this upon yourself, Samuel! And you owe me! You have to be super nice to me for the foreseeable future because that was just cruel and unusual punishment.”

           “Still with the Samuel?!” He laughed along with you “C’mon, Doc!”

           “Fine, Sam. Let’s go down stairs, I think we’ve kept him waiting long enough.”

====================Steve’s POV=======================

           Stepping out of the shower Steve was happy to be back in his own home after another strenuous mission. He was supposed to be on vacation. Matter of fact, Falcon was the one that was meant to be handling things for about 3 weeks but hey, when the your country needs you, and Nick Fury personally calls for you, what are you going to say, no?

           Usually when he comes back home from a long mission he goes to Sylvia’s in Harlem and picks up a plate and continues to make it through his to-do list. Next on the list was season 2 of Friends, which from his googles he learnt was maybe a rip off of a show called Living Single? Never the less it was added to his watchlist. He was unusually happy though because his roommate Sam told him all about their new neighbor who apparently was very blessed when it came to throwing down in the kitchen. Speaking of his loud roommate he heard him shouting over the Troubleman soundtrack that he didn’t want his food to get cold. Pulling on a plain white shirt and some khakis he put on some sneakers he jogged down the steps he quickly got a bottle of wine out of the fridge and followed Sam out of the house and locked the door behind him.

           Meanwhile Sam was skipping like a child on Christmas. He knew Sam loved his food but he felt as if this excitement was a bit over the top. He’d eaten with her several times. Was the food that wonderful? Why did he look so happy? Standing behind him on her stoop he was getting more and more confused. Raising an eyebrow at Sam who was almost bouncing out of his shoes, Sam turned around and gave him a large gap toothed grin.

           “You alright buddy?” He asked gently placing an arm on Sam’s shoulder.

           “Yeah, sure man. Just really happy about what’s about to happen” before he could respond, the door swung open and a tantalizing aroma started wafting out as he heard Sam say exactly what he was thinking. The house smelled amazing. Before he knew what was happening he was being asked if he thought you looked nice. He could have sworn that he heard his favorite song, Unforgettable by Nat King Cole playing while she spun in what seemed like slow motion and stopped to look at him. He heard his mouth saying she absolutely did look gorgeous. While they were having whatever exchange they were having the music in his mind was still playing and he couldn't stop looking at her like the magic she was. Slowing drawing his eyes over her umber skin, this dark yellow-brown that looked so warm and inviting. He looked at her eyes like onyx and was getting lost in them in the best way possible. She was tall for a woman, around 5’8 at least, and she was definitely what the internet told him was thiccc. Looking to the top of her head he wanted to run his hands through her hair and then twist it around his hand and pull back and expose her neck and pepper kisses there. His eyes were pulled to her breasts and as he watched them rise and fall he thought about palming them and taking a Hershey’s Kiss into his mouth and  all of a sudden his member started to wake after such a hibernation. He had to snap out of it. This was grossly inappropriate, this respectable woman invited him to her home being neighborly and here he is, violating her in his mind. Imagining terrible sinfully delicious things he could do with her, and to her. Imagining pulling her dress up and finding that she forgot to wear panties. He caught her looking at him crazed and to be honest he hadn’t been listening or even hearing anything said between her and Sam. His eyes shot down to the floor and he rubbed the back of his neck. He had to convince himself that she couldn't read minds. Yes he had met some special people with special abilities but he had to just pray to Christ she wasn’t one of them. Feeling guilty he continued looking at his feet. He heard her tell him to sit and she took the bottle of wine from him. Her long beautiful fingers briefly grazed his and he felt as if he was diving into that ice cap all over  and there’s the music again! That same song! What the hell was happening? Okay she was beautiful and ethereal and quite frankly looked like a painting that someone slaved over and like she was made out of love and light, but so what? He’d been with other women since Peggy, sure, but none of them made him feel this way. None of them made him hear music for Pete’s sake. While she and Sam went upstairs  he was grateful to be able to adjust himself without anyone seeing. He took a seat on her sofa.

           Looking around Steve was loving the ambiance. He looked around and then stood up to get a closer look of everything. Laughing to himself he saw the record player propped open and spinning with Nat King Cole’s smile looking up at him. At least he wasn’t completely crazy. Okay, well maybe he had to get laid? It had been a while admittedly. He let out a stressed sigh and continued to look around. He saw pictures leaning up against the wall in frames and the nosier part of him got the best of him and he started thumbing through them. He saw little girls and a teenage boy, assumedly her family. Her parents and then her. There was one of her smiling with her white coat and remembered that Sam does call her the Doc. Thinking of Sam he turned wondering what was keeping them, listening keenly he heard hearty laughter. Sam came down first and held a hand out to help her down the stairs. She clutched her imaginary pearls and in an exaggerated Southern Belle accent said

           “Oh my, thank you kindly sir! You’re just too sweet! ”

           “Of course darlin’! Anything for you!” Sam said in a likened manner. “ Plus you know our agreement and all. I’m yours until you say so”.

He caught her wink at him. What was she winking for? Why was Sam hers? He just met her for crying out loud how close could they possibly be? In an instant he felt something in the pit of his stomach. What was that? It felt heavy and uncomfortable. He actually shifted in his seat thinking his stomach started acting up when he was about to have the meal of his life. More importantly he wanted to know what the hell was going on with Sam and Y/N. All he knew was Sam needed to back the hell up. Why was he getting so angry? Why was he feeling so…so…- that train of thought was cut off immediately when he saw her smiling and her lips moving with no sound coming out. It was as if a shining light was upon him and in an instant he felt better. Like any issue he had could be solved. What was this?

           “Captain” She said in a voice as smooth as silk “Are you ready?”

He wasn’t sure what she was asking about but he knew right then he would do whatever and go wherever she wanted. He would follow her to the ends of the earth if she smiled at him like that.          

           “Yes ma’am. And please it’s Steve!” He said giving her a patented Captain America smile.

           “Well if I have to call you Steve you have to call me Y/N. Dinner’s ready and the table is set. Are you ready?” She repeated.

           “After you” He said with an out stretched arm.

           Seated at the table he was admiring her while she whizzed around the kitchen. He didn't know how long he was staring at her before he heard Sam clearing his throat. Turing his attention back to his roommate he caught him with a mischievous smile on his face.

           “What is it?” He inquired

           “Nothing man, just looking at that stupid grin on your face every time you look at the Doc. You like what you see?”      

           “Sam, I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

           “Mmhmm, yeah, sure, whatever you say Cap”

           “I hope you guys brought your extra loose pants because there’s a lot of food here!”

           Turning his head to the sound of her voice he found himself getting up.

           “Can I help you with anything ma’- I mean Y/N.” He corrected

           “That's so sweet of you Steve.” She said passing him a big plate of fried chicken in one and a bowl of mashed potatoes in the other. “Sam why don’t you come get some plates as well?”          

           “I think the Cap’s got it”

           “It’s no problem, helping out is the least I can do.” They said in unison. She laughed at their harmony and agreed. After a 2 more trips to the kitchen the table was set and they were all seated around it.

           “Everything looks delicious Y/N, I can’t wait to try it” He said.

           “I’m more than happy to oblige. You both were so helpful the first day we met, Sam has been really handy around the house as well. It's the least I could do, plus he told me that you loved soul food. Although he didn’t tell me you were Captain America, it was a little bit of a surprise. Kept that little bit of information for himself.”

           He looked at her tentatively “I hope it was a good one, hope you’re not disappointed”

           “Absolutely not” She rushed out. A silence fell in the room and he was getting lost in her again.

           “Well!” Sam’s voice irrupted, shattering the moment “Now that the cat is out of the bag, lets dig in!” He snapped out of  whatever daze he was in and for the next hour they ate and laughed. He had his fill of the most amazing fried chicken that was just spicy enough, corn bread, mac and cheese,  greens, black eyed peas and things he’d never even tried before. He looked at her and realized he hadn’t stopped laughing all evening. She was a fantastic host,  just as he’d thought.

           “The chicken is amazing Y/N”

           “Thank you! You don’t think it’s too spicy? She asked.

           “Not at all” He started “ I actually added a little bit of Frank’s hot sauce on it”

           “Don’t listen to that mad man” Sam said “Mr. Boner was right, the chicken is hot.”

           “Mr. Boner…?” Steve said confused.

           She laughed“ Sam means Dr. Boner, the bone man. He’s just my work husband and lowkey a little bit of my husband, husband. We were friends back in med school and now we work together. He was the one that recommended me for the job. And I’m sure as you remember from the first day we met, I can do most things by myself, however when I really do need help and I’m completely out of my depth I call him.” For some reason Steve started to feel that thing he felt when he was watching Sam help Y/N down the stairs.            “Wow,” he breathed “So you both must be close”

           “Yeah what can I say? He’s…peculiar but he’s always there when I need him. He’s one of the people I think I depend on second to my family. In fact I would love for you all to meet officially one day.”

           “Officially?” Steve inquired.

           “Yeah Sam here has spoken to him a couple times on Facetime and they make fun of me and Boner tries to tell him some embarrassing school stories.-“

           “Yeah! The Doc here is trying to keep this calm and collected façade up and I would like to know what she was like before she turned into this statue of constant perfection” Sam said rolling his eyes.

           She kissed her teeth “Boy please, I’ve been perfect from the day I came out the womb!”

           A comfortable silence fell over them and Steve imagined to himself that there probably wasn’t a time she wasn’t perfect,

           “I hope y’all have space for desert! I’m keeping it real simple with apple pie, homemade  vanilla bean ice cream sprinkled with pralines.” She started to push her chair backward from the table but Sam told her he would do get it. Did he really know her home thatwell? After a little back and forth and a lot of  convincing she decided to stay. It was only the two of them at the table and then she turned  her full attention to him.

           “So Steve, tell me about yourself.”

======================Your POV=======================

           Try and act normal Y/N , please Y/N, please please, please I am begging you just be normal for once in your life. Try to act like you didn’t fall asleep after rubbing one out to this man last night.  Think of anything. ANYTHING else. Anything but how you want  to be devoured by him and how you want to eat him up too.

           “So Steve, tell me about yourself” Nice one Y/N! Way to fucking go! tElL mE aBoUt yOuRsElF. What the hell is this? 60 minutes?

           “That’s a really broad question…” He started. Of course it is! Here I fucking go trying to be all Fox and Friends, meanwhile there is a whole ass museum about ‘himself’ that I now have to act like I’ve never been to.                                                  

           “That's fair” you said, trying to save face “How about what do you like to do when you aren’t wearing the stars and stripes?”

           “Hmm. I enjoy the internet as whole. So much helpful information on there. I like that when I become a fan of something in real life I can meet people who also love said thing and they can give me more information about it and even new recommendations. I enjoy painting. I consider myself a little bit of a foodie. I like going to movies that are barely full so I can get that theater experience without so many people around. That’s all I can think of off the top of my head.”

           “What forums are you a part of? What do you like to paint? Are you into realism or do you kind of just do your own thing?  I love making food and eating it even more. I do that theater thing too! I want to be able to cry without anyone seeing my ugly crying face.”

           “I highly doubt anyone would ever consider you ugly”

           You looked down quickly thanking God for the melanin because chile, the blush. He probably is this nice to everyone he meets. He is, after all, THE Captain America.

           “I kind of just like random stuff,” he continued “probably nothing you’ve ever heard about. And as for my paintings I also just do whatever comes to mind. And drawing and painting things that are fandom relevant.”            

           “Fandom?” You said with the quirk of a brow “You sound like someone from Tumblr. Now I’m really curious. What do you get into online Captain Rogers?” You noticed a redness creeping up on his face. Hopefully you hadn’t upset him by getting too flirty. He was from the old school after-all. Before you could put your foot in your mouth any further, Sam came out with the desert.            

           “Now listen here!” Sam boomed “ I had to take just a sliver of this here pie to make sure it was good. In our line of work we have lots of enemies. One can never be too careful. I did this for the greater good. I did this for my country! That being said I don’t want to hear anything about this further! We’ve spoken about the missing piece long enough!”

           After a brief second passing between you all, laughter broke out and you told Sam to sit his ass down. You got up and served Sam first, since he did ‘work so hard to insure the pie was good’. Next you turned to Steve and served his up. You served yourself a plate last and sat down to wait for the verdict. You heard a deep moan coming from the Cap and turned to see him with his eyes closed. That moan was definitely going to be thought about later.

           “You like?” you asked. The only response you got was a slowly nodding captain savoring your food. You were on cloud nine at this point. He opened his eyes and looked at you. You started on your pie as well. The night continued and you brewed some coffee for the gents and a nice cup of honey ginger tea for yourself. You all eventually moved to the living room and were all laughing like old friends. It was as if even though you just met you had some type of rhythm going. A push and pull of sorts.

           “Well” Sam slapped his hands to his knees standing up “Thank you so much for dinner Doc”

           “It was great to have you as always Sam,” turning to Steve “ And it was an absolute pleasure to meet you. I hope to get to find out eventually what exactly you’re into Captain Rogers.” There goes that redness again. You had to get this shit under control and stop making him so uncomfortable in your home.

           “Trust me Y/N, the pleasure was mine.”

           “I hope we can do this again sometime soon”

           Shutting the door behind them you leaned up against it and let out a squeal. You couldn't believe it you actually had the Captain America over at your house.  For the last few hours you wined and dined him. Now all that was left was to 69 him. You laughed at your immaturity and went to clean up the kitchen.

           The next day you went into the hospital. You had unofficially started and not everyone knew you yet. The guy that had your old position’s name was still on the door. You walked into your office and greeted your assistant, Sonia. She was from the UK and had everything and everyone in the hospital on lock. She knew everything about everything, how to get what you needed, and if she couldn’t get it herself she always ‘knew a guy’ who could. Usually you had a rule about not mixing business with pleasure, but for her you were thinking about making an exception.

           “Good morning Dr. Y/L/N. How was your weekend? She said in her beautiful voice.

           “Nothing much, just had some friends over for dinner”

           “And I didn’t get an invite?” making the cutest pouty face, you had to laugh.

           “Damn” You said with a contemplating look on your face, raising a Tupperware with her name on it “Now what am I gonna do with this? I mean I thought I was going to bring this to my wonderful super ADULT assistant but all I see is a little baby. Little baby? Do you know where my assistant is?”  

           Straightening her back and stretching out her arms with grabbing motions “ Gimmie, gimmie! I’m a big girl!”

           Laughing even more you hand her the Tupperware. You lean on her desk and prepare to ask for your messages when a man walks in.

           “Sonia, my darling, do I have any messages?”

           “I didn’t know you were his assistant Sonia” You said turning to her.

           “I’m not” she remarked making a biting motion at the gentleman. Completely ignoring you he rolls his neck.

           “Christ. I had to cut my vacation short. I heard the new boss has started up. He wasn’t even supposed to start for another 2 weeks. Since I got passed over for the whole promotion to head of Cardio at least I could make a good impression with the guy and be a sturdy number two. I’ve heard his work is flawless and I’ve heard he’s developed his own technique for plaque removal and I want a front row fucking seat. What’s his name again? Dr. Y/L/N?  From the what I hear we have a new cardio god in our midst. It’s about time. I really needed that deep tissue massage too. I hope he notices my efforts, fuck.” You scoff and he rolls his eyes over to the schedule wall as he squints. “There’s an angioplasty scheduled?  I need to be in on that. Sonia, babe, you have to get me into that.”

           With your chin in your arm casually leaning on the desk and looking out the window you remarked “ I don’t think you’ll be able to Dr. Daniels. Seems like you’ve had your own procedure scheduled for the same time.” He finally turns to face you, while you continue to look out the window at the Manhattan skyline.

           “How’d you know my name?” he asks abruptly. You lazily turn to him and tap a finger to his badge. “Right you are…ma’am. Well I can understand that this is a little complicated for you.  medical schedules were difficult for me to read when I first started working here–”

           “Dr. Daniels” Sonia tried to interrupt. He put his hand up to silence her.

           “As I was saying I understand how complicated medical jargon can be for...” How did he manage to look like he was undressing you yet belittling and patronizing you at the same time? “someone like you.”

           “Dr. Daniels!” Sonia said a little louder this time.

           Cutting a look at her he continued “Even though it seems that I have a scheduled procedure I would like to move it as something more important would be taking place at that time.”          

           “More important than patient care?” You questioned “Seems like bad doctoring to me.”

           “Again ma’am, I am sure this all has gone over your head and I would be happy to get someone to explain this in layman’s terms to you-”

           “Gerald!”

           “Sonia please! I have been trying to explain to this… woman.” He looked you over again, this time with more annoyance than anything else. Starting to mumble he started “ Honestly these people watch one lifetime special and get a WebMD membership and think they’re doctors now. Honestly I didn’t go to John’s Hopkins to deal with this bullshit.”

           “That is no way to talk to a patient” You remark “that how you talk to all your patients?”

           “First of all, you aren’t my patient ma’am; I am just trying to be curious to you, and you’re making that pretty difficult by the way. Secondly you come in here acting like you know everything because what? You read my name super fast and can read a procedure board? Thirdly, you’re putting me in a foul mood when I have an important meeting any minute now. Quite frankly I am done with this conversation so good day. He’ll be here any minute” He said straining and looking past you, down the hallway while adjusting his jacket trying to look his best.  

           “Well then this is as good a time as any I suppose” You reply. Fully turning to face him you badge dangled from your neck. “ I’m ‘Him’.  Hello Dr. Gerald Daniels. My name is Dr. Y/F/N Y/L/N. You can just call me Dr. Y/L/N. I’ve heard I am the resident Cardio God.”

           He looked as if he was going to shit a ton of bricks. All that could be heard was Sonia snickering and when you turned to look at her she was typing jibberish on a blank word document. You had to laugh at her antics. Flinging your coat onto the couch in her office, you called over your shoulder “Sonia my messages in 5 please. I’d like some tea as well. Surprise me.” You slammed your door closed and sat at your desk. Damn it felt good to be the boss.

           The rest of your day went by without a hitch and at 4:55 you heard a knock coming from your door.

           “Come in!”

           The door opened slowly to reveal a humbled looking Dr. Daniels with a blueberry scone in one hand and a cheesy mug in the other. You didn’t want to laugh but you did. You loved bad jokes.

           “Dr. Y/L/N, listen I am so sorry about this morning. I was really amped to meet you and I went about things the wrong way.  I would like us to start again… If that’s alright with you. Please don't let my poor behavior taint your opinion of me. I get a little high strung with a  mix of competitive and it usually doesn’t manifest in the way it did today and I cannot stress how sorry I am about it-” You put your hand up cutting him off.

           “ Look dude. You were totally an asshole and should actually be reporting to HR. I was going to report you myself but I asked around about you and apparently you aren’t usually that way with patients. In fact doctors and patients around seem to love you, I couldn't get one bad thing said about you. So I’m giving you a second chance, because I believe in those. But you’re on probation with ME.”

           “Thank you Dr. Y/L/N! This is such a relief for me!”

           “But tighten up! I don't want that kind of trash in my halls again, Daniels! I mean it!” Looking at the clock “And after hours it’s just Y/F/N. Are those for me?

           “Of course!” Handing you the scone he got a packet of heavy cream and jam and gave that to you as well. “Blueberry tea. I sort of have a thing for blueberries and I grow this myself.”

           Nodding you took a sip. It was delightful. It tasted as if you could bottle up the feeling of a country afternoon eating a picnic on some grassy hill with cows roaming over yonder.

           “Daniels this is delicious. I’m going to have to get the leaves from you sometime.”

           “If I give them to you, could you lift my probation?”

           “Don't push it!” Throwing his hands up he made a ‘no offense motion and laughed’ backing out of the office he said he would see you tomorrow.

           Officially off the clock you brought out your laptop and logged onto Tumblr. You sent your beta a message.

MSG to Jay: Jaybaby. I know this is coming late. I know, I know. Works got me swamped but on the up and up I’ve come up with some new heat and I’m sure the readers will love it.  Here are the next few chapters. Could you get them back to me within the week? Love ya big time. X

           You sent that and started with your new fic. This one was about a girl moving next door to captain America and basically falling in love with him. It’s going to be super fluff and light hearted cuteness. There’ll probably be a situation where oh no! they have to sleep in the same bed or some trope shit like that. Before signing off  you heard a ping and it was a couple jpegs from Rod. It was a picture of you this time. Well part of you anyway. You had your identity to worry about but your icon was a picture of your eyes and part of your hair  behind your glasses. He made the most beautiful rendition of it. He also sent a couple of pictures of T’challa, Aquaman for your amusement. Attached you found a note:

Doc. You were one of the first people to start reblogging my pictures and you were the first person to write a fic based off something out of my imagination. You really gave me great feedback and support and I’ll always be grateful for that. Take care for now and happy writing.

           You changed you icon to the one he painted and closed your laptop smiling. You turned off the lights to your office and started on your way home.

Tag list.

@champagnesugamama @smooth-sunflower @queenwinchester27 @hamilboots @trees-are-friends (y’all didn’t ask to be tagged explicitly but I assumed you may want to be, If not let me know and I’ll remove you from the taglist xx)

[5hfanfiction]

Love Will Remember

Chapter Thirty Six: While I Was Gone

Camila’s POV

*Flashback*

I had someone once, who made every day mean something. But now, they weren’t around anymore and it was all my fault.

I am lost.

And nothing means anything anymore.

She made me see the beauty in the little things. She made the sunrise much more than the beginning of just another day. It meant that I had the opportunity to be with her another day, to enjoy this life with her. But now, the thing that hurts the most, is when the sun sets and I didn’t have her hand to hold, her lips to kiss, I didn’t have her anymore.

I always asked her, “What if you hurt me? What if you left me?” But the irony of that, was that I did the hurting. I’m the one who left. I’m the one who destroyed her heart. I promised myself, that I would’ve took good care of it. Because having something as precious as her heart, it deserved to be treasured.

I didn’t deserve her, but I wanted her. I wanted her so much that it physically ached. It had been three years since I saw her. I’m not sure how she’ll react to seeing me. I don’t even know if she’ll want to see me.

Why would she?

But a part of me couldn’t help but think, that maybe she wanted to. Maybe she longed for my presence, as much as I wanted hers. Maybe she craved my body, as much as I craved hers. Maybe she yearned to hear my laugh, as much as I missed hers. And fuck, the intoxicating song that was her voice, I missed it badly.

Maybe, just maybe, she loves me too.

“Camila?” I looked up from my lap, and when I laid eyes on my old friends, the tears that glistened their eyes, quickly turned into a stream. “Oh my god…” Dinah whispered out and ran towards me. I didn’t have any reaction time to process what was happening. I felt her arms envelope my body, then another, another, until I was being crushed by my friends.

We didn’t say anything. We just stood there, hugging one another and crying. Their arms felt like home. It felt as though, I was finally home.

Don’t get me wrong, Maggie and Ariana; who were a couple now, were the two best friends anyone could ever ask for, but I missed this. I missed Dinah’s hugs. I missed Ally’s cheerfulness, I missed Normani’s sass and I missed Mendes’…Mendesness. These girls, well women now, were from the better part of my life. They would forever be embedded into my heart.

After a few minutes, we pulled away from each other’s embrace. Maggie and Ariana, were standing on the sidelines, not wanting to interrupt our moment.

Both Ally and Dinah’s eyes were still filled with tears. Normani and Mendes both smiled at me. That genuine smile, that was contagious, I couldn’t help but smile back. God, I missed them.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry for all the pain and hurt, I put you guys through,” I started my apology, but Dinah shook her head furiously.

She placed a hand on my shoulder and looked me dead in the eyes. “Don’t apologise, Camila. Don’t apologise for doing what you thought was best for you. We’re just glad to have you back. Alive and in one piece.”

Normani nodded. “Dinah’s right. I still think you could’ve called and saved us the heartbreak over the years, but, we understand what you did and why you did it. It’s not easy going through what you went through. But we get it.”

I smiled. “Since when do you agree with Dinah?” I laughed softly, trying to lighten the mood.

“Those two still don’t get along,” Mendes butted in. “They’re always at each other’s throats. But I don’t blame, Mani. Dinah is annoying.” Everyone laughed.

They’ve all grown up, physically and mentally from what I could tell. Dinah was always understanding but never this understanding. She would’ve smacked me and told me that what I did was dumb.

Ariana cleared her throat to direct our attention to her, “So, I think you guys should catch up. Tell Camila about whatever she missed out on, and then we’ll finish up our plan okay?” My friends nodded. What plan were they talking about?

“What plan, Ari?” I asked dumbly. “I thought I would be getting to see Lauren?”

Maggie pushed off from the wall and nodded. “You would be. Hopefully if she decides to come here,” she gestured toward our old apartment. It wasn’t occupied after the girls moved out and I couldn’t help but wonder why. “But you guys should catch up. Then we’ll go from there. It’s still really early, so if you want, you can take a nap.”

I shook my head ‘no’. “I’m fine. I’ll really like to know what’s going on in your lives. How’s everything?”

Maggie and Ariana decided to leave us to bond and said they’ll return soon.

I got to know about my friend’s lives. They were doing really well and I was beyond proud of them. What touched my heart, was the fact that Ally named her child after me. She told me, that she wasn’t sure where I was, but this was the closest she’ll ever be to me.

“Guys?”

“What’s up?” Mendes poured herself a glass of orange juice and took a seat on the arm of the recliner.

I ran my hands through my hair. “What about Don and Meryl? Do they know that I’m back? Can you take me to see them later?”

Everyone’s expression went grim and I became confused. What happened? Did the Streeps hate me for leaving? I should’ve called them and told them not to worry about me. I wasn’t worth it. They did so much for me. They took me under their wings and I had hurt them.

Normani sighed. “Camila…” she paused and looked at me. What happened? Why we’re they acting like this? “Don and Meryl…they’re gone.”

“Gone? Did they leave?” I asked dumbly. But when I saw her shake her head, that’s when I knew what she meant. “Dead? They’re…dead?” My voice broke at the end. “How? What happened?”

Ally sighed and shook her head sadly. “When you disappeared, they were beyond devastated. We tried visiting them, but whenever we did we couldn’t get as much as a sentence out of them. They stopped going to the studio eventually. Don died a year after you were gone and Meryl passed away a couple months ago.”

They were devastated because of me. They were sad because of me. They died because of me. It was my fault. My stupid stunt of running away caused two of the people dear to me to lose their lives. When was I going to stop hurting people? I assumed that when I left, people’s lives would’ve been easier, but it wasn’t. I ruined it even more. Maybe I shouldn’t have came back.

I stood up abruptly. They were lying! They had to be lying. “No. No. No! You’re lying! They’re not dead. I want to go see them. Are they living at the same house? Can I borrow your phone to call them?” I asked no one I particular. I started towards the door and felt a wrist pull me back.

“Mila, we’re not lying. They’re gone,” Dinah looked at me with the saddest of eyes. She knew how much I loved them. But what did I do? I hurt them. I always end up hurting the ones I loved.

I tugged away from her and ran out the room, with her trailing behind me. I ignored her shouts of protests, telling me to stop and asking where I was headed. I had to see for myself. They couldn’t be dead. They couldn’t have died not knowing where I was. They just couldn’t! I passed Maggie on the way and her shocked expression was enough for me to know, that she would’ve been following after me as well.

I headed into the direction I knew all too well from that old apartment. I took it on many days to stop by the studio and when I had to work there. I slowed my pace when I saw the all too familiar building. Approaching it slowly, I saw that it was locked and there hung a photo of both Meryl and Don with the words scribbled above it; “Gone but not forgotten.”

And that’s when the song of guilt hit me so harshly in my chest. They were really gone. It was my fault.

So I let the tears flow. In those salty trickles were the person who I am. A person who feels. I wish it was possible to turn my tears off, or switch off my emotions. Perhaps just save it until I’m alone, but that wasn’t the case. I cried so many times in these past few years of my life. My emotions swirled around inside me like an ocean’s current, deep and strong. Sometimes, I’m terrified to dive into it, just incase I don’t make it out again, but I can’t. It’s hard to bottle up these emotions, so I let it out.

I placed my hand on the glass over the picture and continued sobbing until I felt a pair of arms wrap around my waist. I turned around and buried my face into the crook of Maggie’s neck. I didn’t care if I was going to soak her shirt with my tears and she didn’t seem to care either. She kept whispering that she was there in my ear and that was all I needed. I didn’t need her to say anything comforting, because truth be told, I felt like pure shit. And I didn’t think I could feel any better.

She slid us down to sit on the pavement. Dinah approached us shortly and sat next to us. She took my hand in hers. We just stayed there in silence, until I spoke up.

“Why are you two here? Haven’t I hurt you enough?” My voice was barely above a whisper. I couldn’t take it anymore. I couldn’t stand constantly hurting the people around me. They didn’t deserve that.

Maggie took my other hand and rested my head on her shoulder. “Camzii, you need to chill. Haven’t I proven to you how much you mean to me? How much I care about you?” I sighed heavily.

We’ve been through this conversation so many times but I was growing tired of it. I didn’t deserve them.

“No, Maggie. I don’t deserve this. I don’t deserve you, Arii, Dinah, the rest of the girls, Lauren and I definitely didn’t deserve the Streeps. Everyone around me keeps getting hurt.”

Dinah groaned. “Camila, I’m not going to lie and say you didn’t hurt us or you didn’t hurt me. You did. You tore my heart out and it fucking sucked. But it doesn’t mean you don’t deserve us. We love you, we will always love you. The Streeps, shit, Camila. They loved you like their own daughter. This building?” She gestured at the studio with her free hand. “They left it for you. Before Meryl died, she handed over everything to Normani. She said in hopes that you were to ever return, she wanted you to have it because it meant so much to them and you meant even more to them.”

I remained silent. Why would they leave this for me? After all that I did to them, why?

“I don’t know who these Streep people are,” Maggie pulled her hand away from me and I took my head off her shoulder to look at her. “But they sound like amazing people. Amazing enough to know just how much you’re worth, Camzii. They must’ve loved you till their dying breath and I can honestly tell you, that I’ll do the same. Even if something happens between us, and we don’t talk anymore, I’ll always care about you. You’re my best friend and I love you.”

She placed a kiss on my forehead. I couldn’t help but smile. I still felt extremely guilty over what happened, but at the same time, my friends always made me feel as though I was worth it. Even though I didn’t think I was.

“As much as I hate to admit it, Maggie is right. You’re worth it, Camila. You were worth every sleepless night I had to endure. Every tear that I cried. Every moment I passed by the diner hoping I’ll see your dumb face singing some dumb song,” I chuckled and tried to hold back my tears, but it was no use when I saw that Dinah’s eyes were beginning to fill as well. “But you’re my Walz, and I love you so fucking much. I can’t see a life without you. I’ll go through it all over again, if it meant that I’ll get to have my best friend back at the ending of the day. I wish you didn’t think you were such a shitty person, because you’re not.”

I sighed softly. “What did I do right to deserve you two?” I threw my hands around them both and brought them in for a hug. “Honestly, guys. Thank you.”

“For what?”

I shrugged. “For everything. For putting up with me. For loving me even when I think I was deserving of it. Even though I still think I don’t deserve it. Thank you for never giving up on me, even when I, myself had given up. Just, thank you.”

Maggie clutches her chest dramatically. “Aw. Camzii. Stop. You seriously don’t need to thank us for anything. Right, you bitch?”

Dinah reached over me and smacked Maggie. “Don’t call me that, you bigger bitch,” I laughed. “But, the hoe is right. You don’t have to thank us for anything.”

It was now Maggie’s turn to smack Dinah. I rolled my eyes. Why didn’t I expect them to react like this? They were practically the same person just in separate bodies.

I grabbed both of them. “Would you two stop acting childish?”

“But…But Dinah started it!” Maggie pouted like a five year old. “She’s always starting it!”

My Polynesian best friend scoffed. “It’s not my fault you’re so annoying and deserving of a smack!”

I laughed and pulled both girls up with me. I turned and looked at the picture of Meryl and Don. Was I going to do this place justice? It was obviously still in business by the looks of it. But, I just didn’t think I was going to make them proud. Something caught my eye just under their picture.

It was an envelope, addressed to me with a small blue velvet box next to it.

“Dinah?” I asked without tearing my eyes away from the items. “Do you happen to have the keys to the studio?” She didn’t answer. I just heard the jingling of keys as she placed them in my hands.

I quickly unlocked the doors and was hit with a wave of familiarity when I stepped into the studio. Everything looked the same, but it didn’t feel the same anymore. I went straight to the window and picked up the envelope, Dinah and Maggie trailed behind me, confused as to what was happening.

I tore open the envelope and was greeted to Meryl’s cursive scrawl. I smiled sadly when I saw it.

Dearest Camilita,                             Don and I don’t know if you’ll ever read this. We don’t know if you’ll ever come back. We have grown old, Mija, so one can’t tell how much time we have left. But, we want you to know that wherever you are and if you were to ever come back, you were truly the second greatest thing we could’ve gotten in this lifetime. When our daughter passed away, we didn’t think we would’ve ever been happy again. That’s why we didn’t try to have another child, but God blessed us with you and we found happiness again. And it’s time you found yours.                                 Do you remember when we were walking in the park one day many years ago? I told you to just hold on. You deserve happiness, Camilita. So much happiness. I don’t want you to lose out on one of the best things that could ever happen to you. I don’t want you spending time in the future wondering about “what if you took a chance.” “What” and “If” are two words as non-threatening as words can be. But put them together side-by-side and they have the power to haunt you for the rest of your life: What if? What if? What if? I don’t know how your story will end, but if what you felt then was true love, then it’s never too late. If it was true then, why wouldn’t it be true now? You need only the courage to follow your heart.                                 Open the box. It was a family heirloom that was supposed to given to Trisha. But we want to give it to you. Be brave, Camila. True love only happens once in a lifetime. We don’t have to tell you who it is, because I’m sure you were thinking of her while you read this. Grasp it while you still can. You have our blessings.

Lots of love, Abuela Meryl & Abuelo Don.                                     PS. Camilita, don’t feel bad about how our ending turned out. We love you dearly. You were everything and more.

“Wow,” both Dinah and Maggie exclaimed when they finished reading the letter. I wiped at my eyes before picking up the box. I studied it carefully before opening it.

A ring.

It was an engagement ring.

Maggie gasped loudly, “Holy fuck. Look at the size of that rock!”

Smack.

“What..? What did they mean by giving me this?” I stuttered out.

Dinah tilted my head to look her in the eyes. “Camila, I know you’re not dumb. I know you know exactly what the purpose of an engagement ring is and I know you know what the Streeps said by grasping your true love while you still can,” she looked at the ring then back at me. “So I’m sure you know what they wanted you to do with that.”

“But..I..Lauren…Would she?” I stuttered. Fuck. I always saw myself getting married to Lauren. I never wanted to be anyone’s wife besides hers but with this ring in my hand and my heart hammering against my chest, I didn’t know what to do.

“Would you?” Maggie countered back at me.

I ran my hand through my hair. “I would,” I smiled looking at the ring. “I really would.”

*End of Flashback*

***

I’m horrible. It took forever to update and I don’t have a legitimate excuse, so I’m not giving one. 😆

For real this time, Camren is happening next chapter and the fic will be coming to an end really soon. There’s like five chapters left to go.

Hope you enjoyed it 🦋

[nekomasmanagersblog]

Candy canes, Akashi Seijuro

*Reader POV*

“Candy cane” you said handing out candy canes wrapped in cute little bows, your classmate gave you a small smile before taking one, the reason you were handing out candy canes is because you like to brighten everyone's day, because of this, you were know as the school sweetheart, always helping out and trying to make everyone smile.

Since the holiday was approaching fast, you were determined to give everyone at your school a candy cane, you had only a small amount of people left, that being the basketball and football team, you did the football team first as you know they wouldn't mind you disturbing their practise, now for the basketball team.

You slowly made your way to the gym plucking up your courage to actually go inside, you were not that worried and were happy to give them the sweet, it was the captain you were worried about, Akashi seijuro, you knew that everyone thought he was intimidating, you also thought that, but when you said everyone was getting a candy cane, you meant that EVERONE was getting one, even the intimidating Akashi Sejuro.

you opened the doors to the gym to see the team taking a small break, one of the members had taken immediate notice to you, jogging over to you before speaking.

“(l/n)-chan, did you decide to watch our practise” Kotaro questioned giving you a grin, one which you returned.

You shaked your head, “I came to give you all some candycanes” you answered reaching into your bag bringing them out.

Kotaro gave a small frown “Sei-chan will be angry if you give these out” you gave a small laugh.

“I know, but that wont stop me, I will be quick” you said stubbornly, then walking over to the rest of the team, handing out the candy canes getting small thank yous back, you felt a dark presence behind you. You turned around to see Akashi glaring at you, which in turn you gave an innocent smile.

“Is there a problem Akashi-san” you said looking at the red head, he gave you a mean stare.

“what do you think you are doing, interrupting our practice to hand out stupid sweets” he spat, you glanced back at the team, they were staring intently at you and Akashi, wondering what will happen. You turned back around opening your mouth to speak.

“I give everyone at school candy canes, that includes the basketball team and yourself, I refuse to leave anyone out”  you said bringing out another Candy cane from your bag, pushing it into his hand, you gave a small bow towards Akashi and the team, turning around to leave the room only to be pulled back to face Akashi.

He put the Candycane back into your hand, “I dont want it, I dont care if you hand them to everyone, interrupt the practise again and I will end you, got it” Akashi glared letting go of your hand and walking away.

Angry you look into your bag, grabbing a bunch more candy canes chucking them at him, one at a time, Akashi and the rest of the team froze, the team standing up (except Mayuzumi) prepared to step in, incase Akshi hurts you.

But before he can do anything, you storm up to him, until your face in right infort of his, chucking a handful of candy canes in his face.

“I AM TRYING TO BE NICE TO YOU AND YOU THROW IT BACK IN MY FACE, YOU ARE AN IGNORANT BASTARD YOU NEEDS TO LEARN SOME MANNERS, WHEN SOMEONES GIVES YOU SOMETHING, YOU SAY THANK YOU, IF YOU DON’T WANT IT THEN FINE, BUT DON’T BE A PRICK ABOUT IT” you shouted before storming out the gym leaving Akashi and the rest of the team staring at you.

 “wow” Kotaro said before getting a small wack on the head by Reo, they all started at Akashi waiting for his reaction, he stands in shock before going after you, the team debating if they should go or stay.

*scene change* 

You sat yourself under a tree, bringing out a candy cane eating it angrily, you see a shadow looming over you, already knowing who it is you continue staring at the ground, but a hand grabbed you chin forcing it up.

You lock eyes with Akashi, you could tell he was angry as you didd just scream and him and chuck candycanes.

“Im sorry” akashi said, softening his eyes, shocked you stare back at him, not knowing what to do, “it was rude of me to reject your offering and threatining you when you were only being nice” he continued, he sat down beside you, pulling out a candy cane probably one you threw at him before eating it, you both sat in silence eating the sweet.

“Im sorry for shouting at you” you muttered looking straight, from the corner of your eye you could see Akashi turn his head to face you, he gave a small smile.

you returned it, finishing your candy cane you got up ready to leave as did Akashi needing to return to practise, he stopped for a second before speaking “seriously if you shout at me again I will not hesitate next time” before walking towards the gym, staring at him in disbalief you let out a small puff beofre beginning to walk home

 *what a bastard* you thought to yourself, looking up at the sky as it began to snow, you pulled out another candy cane eating it *I have a problem with candy canes” you thought, wondering if you were obsessed or not.

*back at the gym*

“you really pissed her of Sei-chan” Kotaro said, earning a glare from the Captain.

“Kotaro another hundred laps around the gym” Akashi barked, turning to face the door Akashi’s mind trailed back to you, no one was brave enough to talk to him, let alone shout, Akashi gave a small smirk.

“ooohh Sei-chan has a crush” Kotaro teased nugging his elbow into Reo, “he will hear you” Reo whispered.

“ KOTARO TWO HUNDRED LAPS” Akashi shouted, “too late” Eikichi said giving a small chuckle returning to his own training.

I think the ending was pretty bad, oh well, please do request as the request box is open. Hope you all enjoyed this one shot and sorry for occ and grammar mistakes.

[bb-bigbang-org]

EPISODE 3 - “The bottom line: I really hope that this is the week where Drew goes.” - CODY

DESIREE

Daily Thoughts for Day 10:

Parting Words: Before the eviction, Ashley DMed me with some parting knowledge. She said she knows she is being evicted, but to make sure I watch out for Joe because he is well-liked and a "wild-card". She said he's close with Brooke, Kayla, Mandi, & Frosby and they may feel like they owe him. None of this surprises me, it is similar to what Austin told me yesterday. I do wonder if there's another alliance that Frosby is in with Joe. I do still trust Frosby and I believe that he has my best interest at heart, even if there is something else going on. I may just ask him straight up if there's another alliance.

Eviction: Ashley was evicted on a unanimous vote. I don't have much to say about this. She must have gotten herself in a bad position with both sides of the house. That's unfortunate. I wonder what's going to happen with her dying star. She messaged me before leaving so maybe she likes me, and she might give it to me. But I don't necessarily want it because I have a chance of getting the disadvantage too…

AUSTIN

Omg yessssssssss! Lukas winning is one of the best outcomes that could ever happen for me this week.  Having a second alliance with mandi and drew I feel will be good for me long term in the game as well. I like everyone in the game but they are some ppl I dont trust.  Brook, joe,frosby,and katrina are ppl I'm watching out for. ik trying to keep brook close to me tho just incase maybe she actually does wanna work together.  

CODY

I’m loving this idea that Lukas has come up with about getting the house to cast votes on who they want to go. Because my blow up with Drew I think did plant some seeds that he’s not really an asset in this game. And from what I’ve heard people are looking to throw some votes at him, which means that if he finishes in the top 2 of this. And Lukas is a man of his word, then Drew goes up on the block

The downside is that I’ve been the biggest character so far in this game. It’s been majorly impossible for me to slide under the radar though I have tried ever since I got saved. After Austin saved me I’ve been trying to be super chill and I think I’ve done a good job at it so hopefully people will realise that there’s bigger fish to fry in this game than myself. I actually think the fact that I’ve been on the block twice in this game could be something that people won’t respect and I might be able to twist it in my favour and say that I’m not going to win because everybody keeps nominating me “I’m such a joke”, who knows it might actually work. Will just have to wait and see...

Lukas did express interest in wanting to save me last week had he won power of veto however he did approach me after the blowup with Drew saying it probably wouldn’t be a smart move for him however my argument would be that if Drew is truly playing a bad social game I don’t think saving me would have been that big of a hindrance in the game

The bottom line: I really hope that this is the week where Drew goes. He’s my biggest liability in this game and has no allegiance to me or any of my people. And the longer he stays in the worse off myself and my people are....

DESIREE

Daily Thoughts for Day 11:

HOH Strategy: I am wary about winning the HOH this week because I feel like I am sort of sitting in between two sides of the house. Austin seems to trust me and come to me with information, but I have an alliance with Cody, and they are enemies. For the comp, I tried to get decent scores that I didn't think would win. Last time I tried that, I placed 2nd out of 16 players though... I'm nervous!

HOH Results: Lukas won HOH again. He is probably putting a target on his back winning 2/3 HOHs, but that's not my problem. I'm okay with this win. I don't think he'll come after me because he talks to me fairly often. He may go after Cody because he's already put him up and it'd be safer than putting new blood on his hands. But I think we'll have to just see what happens. He just said "This HOH is going to work a little different, so stay tuned!" What does that mean??

Lukas's Announcement - Lukas has decided to put his nominations up to a house vote. That's probably the smartest way for him to mitigate risk from being HOH twice already. I feel even more okay after this because I feel like there are definitely bigger targets in this house than me. I feel pretty safe from nomination this week...

Andy's Realization: After discussing the nomination votes with the Syndicate alliance, Andy brought up a really good point about this Lukas thing. He may be trying to put a smaller target on his back by asking the house who they want out. But really he's gaining a lot of information from everyone about who they want gone. He could figure out what the alliances are based on who answers the same. So, we are going to each put slightly different votes to try to deflect suspicion.

Brooke: Apparently Brooke messaged Cody saying she's going to suggest that I go up because I never reply to her DMs. I want to be upset by this but she's kinda right, I don't really answer her DMs because usually she doesn't say much so I don't have anything meaningful to respond to…

ANDREW

I’m going to start with this. I hated Lukas “google form” on how he’s going to make his decision. Nevertheless, He was “a man of his word” and made his decision based on how the house voted. I’m really surprised with the results. Or am I? 

I got 0 votes, that is wonderful, my under the radar (UTR) strategy is going great. SYNDICATE is my main alliance, but I know it can die. WHATS THE TEA is my spy alliance, I want to keep Brooke close, I trust mandi 100%, she talks straight up, but Brooke is very calculated with her words, I can’t trust her, so I need someone I can trust with someone I don’t, to make them feel comfortable, and when I have the opportunity, strike. LONG CON. FUNFRESHFAB is my underdog alliance, I’m very certain this two girls are alone in the game, and if not, is good to have all wild cards in one room. I like small alliances, right now. With these two alliances. I can pick off at least KAYLA  and DREW. 

More later.. xoxo 🥥 

DESIREE

I keep losing track of if I submitted...sorry if this is a duplicate

Daily Thoughts for Day 12:

I was nominated over Cody...are you freaking kidding meeeeeeeeee? Ugh I'm super annoyed right now. I hope that I'm not the target here. Lukas's HOH strategy is just a mess, and if the intention was to stay without blood on his hands, it really backfired. We see through this strategy and recognize how much information he just collected. I don't know what I'm going to do, though... I just have to try hard for POV. If Austin wins, I wonder if he would use it, and if so on who? I'm guessing he's closer with Kayla than with me, but we do still talk game often...so I don't know..

CODY

Well shit I got put on the block for a second time in this game

And I genuinely don’t have much hope whatsoever that I’ll be saved sadly...I am still trying to scramble however it’s just not likely and I’m at peace with it. It does suck that Drew is gonna get the last laugh on me I really wanted to send that guy home after he screwed me and then went on to alienate himself from me and my people

DESIREE

Daily Thoughts for Day 13:

POV Competition: That competition had me majorly stressed. I spent hours preparing and I still didn't do as much as I would have liked. If time was a factor, I'd be screwed. But, overall I think I did okay. My strategy was to try to cut the pool in half with each question.

Pre-POV Results Thoughts: Austin said he would use the POV on me if he wins because he wants to work with me. I'm not sure if he actually will, but if he does win I need to prepare my allies for the possibility of him using it on me, so they don't think I'm doing something sneaky behind my back. I never approached Austin to work with him, but he messages me every day telling me his plans and now wants to help me, so why would I turn that down? I could use that to my advantage and help my allies.

POV Ceremony: I was sooooooo close to winning that POV and that frustrates me a lot. Brooke won, who is buddy buddy with Kayla, so it was obvious that she would take Kayla off the block. My only saving grace is that Cody was the replacement nominee and I think it's pretty obvious that he's a bigger threat than me.

Campaigning For Votes: I have talked to the other members of the Syndicate alliance and they have both agreed to vote Cody out instead of me. Austin also messaged me and said that he is for sure voting Cody and he is pushing for others to do the same. Kayla told me even before the POV ceremony that she would vote for me to stay over Cody if she had the option. I have also heard that Chloe and Katrina are voting out Cody as well. So, if everyone is telling the truth, then I'll be safe. I won't feel safe until the votes are read, though.

FROSBY

So ya with Cody and Desiree up on the Block for this elimination this just fucking sucks for me right now. Like really is the worst for my game. I mean I knew Cody would eventually go, that's why I was keeping him around was to be a vote shield for as long as I could keep him around. Now it looks like he is gone for good which I mean is better than seeing Desiree go, and I mean at this point with how many people voted for Desiree she might just become me and Andrews new vote shield. All I know is Andrew and I were sitting pretty in our 4 man alliance with Cody and Desiree and now this whole vote thing Lukas did really screwed over the Syndicate alliance. The good news is the alliance is designed to be the under the radar players all teaming up and working together without anyone knowing about us. That plan can still work without Cody, it actually might be a lot easier to work without Cody, because if Desiree can slide back into the shadows after this vote us 3 can quietly make a Final 6 if we play our cards right and not make any enemies and I know Andrew is good at not making enemies as for Desiree, seeing 6 different people vote for her in the Lukas poll makes me think she isn't as Under the Radar as I thought.  Oh well we will see how this vote goes, I'm thinking about making a play to just vote against Desiree with Katrina, just to make the vote 9-2 but then both of us just deny it like crazy and act like we have no idea who those 2 votes are and create more chaos in the house that I, Katrina and Andrew can all use to hide under. (again this idea is in the back of my mind but I probably won't do it idk yet, I might feel a little silly when I cast my vote this afternoon so we will see)  

MANDI

i wish we could get the votes to flip again. that would really stir up the house.😂 but only 2 other people are on board with me.

DESIREE

Daily Thoughts for Day 13:

Smear Campaign: I woke up today to the news that Cody has been running a smear campaign against me. He is telling people that I was the one pushing to vote Kayla out. Meanwhile, Cody was the one who first mentioned targeting Kayla. It seems like they aren't believing the lies, which is great, but I wonder what else he's saying that I haven't heard about...

Eviction: So, the vote was 10-1 and Cody was evicted. Thank goodness. I mean, I figured it would go that way, but you just never know. Before Cody left, he said he was lying about it being his birthday. What a piece of work... Getting to know him he seemed like a good guy, I just wish he didn't play the villain so much.

HOH Competition: That competition was so hard and I need to work on my typing skills. Pretty sure there's no way I'm winning this one.😞 Hopefully one of my other alliance members wins…

WEEK 3 CAST ASSESSMENT 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u39yg_9iHUQ

[calwh7]

Shadows of the past

series of Klaus x Liz oneshots/drabbles - Part 1

Not really feeling this one, sorry if you get offended that Liz smokes in this one but it does kinda tie in with some character development of hers. Really don’t like this one so I’ll probably work on my other oneshot of the class assignment because I think I’m doing okay with that one.

—————————————————————

Liz POV

The halls were packed full of people and carts carrying mail, something that rarely happened in my department. My department was pretty elite, most employees of the ministry didn't even know it existed. But today was the day that my boss decided that it would be fun for us to work with the other departments of the Ministry of Magic. Ugh, I just hope I can avoid Klaus. Incase you are wondering, my department focuses on changing the past. We are all time travellers you see. It's little things we change though but they can eventually become huge. I primarily focus on changing the lives of dark wizards and witches. Making them all good and stuff. I also forgot to mention that I am head of the department, that means I'm the one informing the new comers. Walking down the corridor I popped a cigarette in my mouth, igniting it as I squeeze my way through. I could see the door to the auditorium up ahead, better I go outside for a few minutes before entering. I take long drags and admire myself in the glass reflection of a window. I had cut my hair a bit shorter, it's now in a bob. That's what the hair lady said anyway. Oh crap, I'm probably going to see Klaus today. I'll probably have to talk to him, teach him! I wasn't ready for this. He's most likely forgot about me, what could 13 days do to him anyway? I still love him, I hope he doesn't get to much of a shock when he sees me though.

Scraping my cigarette end against the wall, I disposed of it and headed for the auditorium. Waving to my colleagues I walk through customs, through the doorway and to my desk. I shared the desk with 2 others. I place my briefcase I was holding onto the polished oak and clear my throat. Great, they’re all male. "Good morning, boys. My name is Liz, but you'll all call me Miss Hart. From now on, I'm you're boss. Let's start off straight, how many of you can actually time travel using a natural gift?" No hands went up. "How many of you can travel using a turner?" 43 out of 67. Not too bad. "Well, at the end of this meeting I'd like those that put there hand up to register with me and those who hadn't register with Ian-" I pointed towards him. "This work will be dangerous, you'll get a proper briefing tomorrow before you go into training. 6 o'clock sharp. Any questions, you can ask now" Holy shit! Thousands of hands went up. "Yeah you?" I pointed to a brown haired lad. "How far have you gone back?" His curious gaze was met with other onlookers. "79 AD, anyone else?" A loud chorus of ooh and ahh filled the auditorium. "When will we be able to jump that far?" I heard a voice in the audience. "Most likely never" "What were you doing there?" A young boy with a bright face inquired. "I was in Misenum, near Pompeii and Herculaneum during the eruption of Mount Vesuvius. I was a servant to Fleet Commander Pliny the Elder and I had to steal an alchemy book from his nephew during the eruptions of 79 AD. I was successful and now we don't have another dark wizard on our hands" I smiled at everyone's enthusiasm. "Unfortunately I now have to leave you all. I will see you tomorrow morning, before I go I want to register the people I mentioned before and Ian will do the same" I picked up a registering paper and pen from my suitcase and the boys all made a neat line in front of my desk. "Name, age, month and year of birth and state of residence please" I asked the first man politely. "Charlie John Bennet, aged 26, born 22nd March. Current residence of apartment 46 of Whiteside street, Gedonelune City" I scribbled down the names as fast as I could.

The last name I received caught me off guard. "Klaus Goldstein, aged 28, born 26th January. State of residence is Goldstein Manor, Gedonelune City" I hesitantly looked up and met his gaze, piercing purple eyes bore deep into mine. “Ahh, yes, umm, sorry. I’ll go write that down” I was in such a fluster that I dropped my pen in front of Klaus. He picked it up and handed it to me in one swift move. “You really ought to be more careful, Miss Hart” Klaus smirked back at me, turning me slightly red. God, how could I of missed out on this?! I took the pen from him, accidentally brushing against his hand with my own. In that moment I felt like holding his hand and kissing him like we had done all those years back. Well, judging by his behaviour I think he still recognises me. “I’ll visit you in your office later tonight” Klaus whispered so him and I could only hear. I visibly blushed back at him. Waving at his back, he turned around and when he reached the doorway he winked at me. Ohh! Now that was sexy! I could see that he had changed a little. Maybe he has just gotten to be a little womaniser or maybe he’s just getting more flirtatious around his love interests. Wait, am I still one of them? Well of course Liz, he just said that he’d meet you later in your office. “The great Liz Hart embarrassed by a Goldstein? Pretty funny if you ask me” Ian giggled away to himself. “Oh shut up Ian”

[thatchoiboy]

Congratulations | 2jae

📝 summary : “Congratulations, you’ll never come back to me.”

📝 pairing : Jaebum, Youngjae (GOT7)

📝 genre : angst

📝 word count : 1k

📝 notes : uhm, ik a lot of people dont like first pov but i wrote it in first pov because it gives more emotions so yeah, enjoy :)

➢ 2

➢ 3

Chapter 1 : Why

It’s been 3 months since you’ve left me hanging on the phone. I was completely bewildered. Winter was always so warm with you, but ever since you left, it was cold, freezing even. You always knew what’s best for me, you were the one who convinces me to rest when you think I’m working too hard, you put up with my shit a lot, especially when I accidentally yell at you after going home from work and took my stress out on you. Yet you were still there for me.

I miss your cuddles, it made me warmer even at the coldest winter. I miss your scent, your sweet kind-of strawberry smell when I sniff your head. I remember watching you argue with someone at the grocery store for that specific shampoo, you literally scared the shit out of that poor kid. 

I miss the cute little faces you make, mainly the one you make when you’re frustrated. The pout you make adds to your cuteness. I miss kissing your moles, I’ve always love the giggles you make when I kiss them every morning when you wake up.

I miss your smile. They always make my insides warm in a comforting way, I would kill anyone just to see you smile. I miss everything about you. After I met you, my life seemed complete. You were the last missing piece I needed to complete my puzzle. But more importantly, I miss you. 

It hurts when I think- no, know, that you’re never coming back.

I’ve always wondered where we went wrong. I thought we were going to last forever, I mean, even your parents loved me, but I guess I was the only one who thought of that. Pathetic. 

I wish you could’ve explained why you just suddenly left me like that. One explanation could’ve sufficed, but you didn’t. Now I’m here like a fool waiting for you incase you ever come back.. will you?

If I ever have a chance to see you again, the first thing I would ask is why. Why did you leave? Why didn’t you answer my calls? Why did you have to disappear out of my life that night? Why? I have so many questions but so little- to no answers.

I could’ve been cuddling with you right now, having you right in my arms where I want you to be. I’ve always love the numerous times you would fall asleep on me, and that I’d have to carry you to our bed. 

I love covering you with thick blankets and wrap my arms around you like a you’re little baby who needs protection. I love calling you cute nicknames, especially sunshine. You made my life brighter. I don’t think I even need to go outside anymore since you alone shine so brightly.

I love the nicknames that you call me. ‘Bummie’, that was my favorite one. I love your cute eye smile, just seeing it makes my day a hundred times better. I love taking care of you when you’re sick, even though you sometimes puke on me and boss me around, but by the end of the day, I would still love you, smothering you with kisses causing me to get sick the next day and you taking care of me.

I love the way you steal my hoodies and wear them, they would look so adorably cute on you since it was too big that it makes me want to pinch your cheeks and kiss it when it gets pink from embarrassment. 

I love you. I’ve always known you love me too, but ever since that night, I’ve been wondering. Did you really love me? 

Let’s take a break, you said. Let’s think about it, you said. What was there to think about? Why take a break? Those words of yours haunted me every single day and night. You don’t know how much sleepless nights I had thinking about you.

Whenever I try to eat, I ended up throwing up. Your homemade meals were so much better. Eating with you is so much better. I barely go outside anymore. Coming home from my job being greeted by silence made me even more depressed. Work became too stressful that I quit. I’m jobless, and without you, I’m lifeless.

Jackson came by sometimes, trying to cheer me up. It never worked. All I can think about is you. But of course I would fake a smile here and there but I’ve never really smiled after you left. How can I smile when you were the reason I smile every single day?

Jinyoung would also come a few times, since we’ve known each other longer, he could tell I was faking it. My smile, my bitter laugh, and almost every emotion I have. It’s sad. He forced me to go out. The sun that was shining so scintillating reminded me of you, you always shone brighter.

Jinyoung took me to the park. Little did he know that was where we first met. It was considerate of him to try to comfort me to get over you.. but I can’t. Your face that was oh so mesmerizing haunted me and caused me anguish. I can’t cure my disease that is to love you. Never. No matter how much it aches, I can never erase you out of my memory. I love you. I love you so much that it hurts. And I broke down. I cried like a little kid who lost their toy, but for me, I lost you. I lost the love of my life.

When I was done weeping and went home, I thank Jinyoung for taking care of me and told him not to worry about me. It’s always nice to know that someone is still there for you. But, its not the same if its not the one you want.. not the one you longed for.

My other friends would still stay in contact with me and would give me little hope. They told me to get over you and find someone else. I tried considering it, but my heart would clench at the thought of cheating on you even though we broke up.. Did we really break up? I’m not so sure anymore. You’re like an enigma that can’t be deciphered. 

They told me I could live without you. But you were my sun, and I was your moon. And without the sun, how can the moon function? Without you, how can I function? 

Without you, how can I live?

[xiumin-on-this-shit]

I Am An Alpha Ch 5: She Comes With Directions

Sehun’s POV

I stare down at my mate, my mate, as she wraps herself around that mutt I captured. Anger and jealousy boil in my chest, why is she holding him? We are her mates! She should be running into my arms so I can finally breath in that delicious scent I know is from her. There is traces of it in the air but it’s coming from the mutt and that makes me even more angry. She marked him, how could she mark another with that sweet vanilla scent of hers? That is meant for us and our pups. I can’t hold in the growl rumbling in my chest and neither can any of my hyungs.

She looks up at us with her fangs bared and I stop. My heart clenches before my wolf rears it’s stubborn head and I return the action. How dare she growl at us because of that mutt. I want to rip that disgusting mutt to pieces, I should have killed him in the forest and went after her than and there. I’m still mad at myself for grabbing him instead of her, we could have avoided this whole thing. My blood boils at the sight of him grabbing her face and forcing her to look at him and only him. He is whispering stuff to her and I see her body slowly relaxing into his embrace. That should be me.

Her pack comes running out of the forest toward her and soon my hyungs and I are racing to them ready to tear them a part but one of her pack members beat us there. It’s the one she is always hiding behind, he blocks us from our mate, teeth bared, claws out, ready to attack.

“Out of the way!” Kris commands but the man doesn’t budge.

“You cannot separate them right now,” He advises us.

“Why the hell not?” Baekhyun snaps this time.

“She will not go to anyone until she wakes up. This always happens after a panic attack, she will only go to me or Jungkook.”

Kris scoffs, “Move, I will get my mate and you will leave before I stop being nice and slaughter you all.” He pushes the tall man out of the way to reach her. I watch as my hyung places a hand on her back only to receive a fierce growl from our sleeping mate. He pauses for a moment before trying again, this time quicker, he slides his hands on to her stomach and pulls at her gently and gets the same response this time with a few little whimpers when he pulled harder.

“Get your hands off her,” One of her members barks pushing Kris away. “If you want her to be okay, you will leave her alone until she wakes up.”

“You can not tell me how to take care of my mate!” Tao snarls.

“Everyone please calm down,” Their leader says calmly but sternly mostly to his own men. “We can’t just expect them to understand how big of a deal this is for her, they don’t know anything about her.”

“She is our mate,” Kai reminds them harshly.

“And what do you know about her beyond that? Do you even know what happened to her just now? Or anything that has happened in her life?” Hoseok questions.

“We haven’t even had the chance to have a conversation with her yet, we shouldn’t be expected to know everything about her right away,” Lay reasons in a soft but strong tone.

Their leader nods in understanding, “There are some things you should know before you try to just dive into this with her, is there anyway we can explain some things to you?”

Kai shakes his head, “We can take care of her ourselves.”

“We will take what ever advise you can give us,” Lay answers flashing Kai a terrifying glare that has me backing down.

“Hyung, are you really going to listen to these guys when they are just trying to run off with her?” Baekhyun scoffs.

“Baekhyun hyung is right, they may trick us,” Tao agrees.

The leader shakes his head, “This is no trick, Insoo has had an interesting life and so she has to be handled with a certain amount of care. She isn’t like any normal omega incase you can’t tell.”

Kris nods, “She with stood the force of all of our dominance for a long time, many can barely handle one of us for more than a few seconds.” We watch him struggle with a internal debate before running his hand threw his hair and letting out a sigh, “You can come in, but only to explain.”

“Of course, we just want to make sure we are leaving her some place safe.”

None of us say anything as they help their pup stand up with our sleeping mate his arms. It was a bit satisfying though when one of them touched her and she has the same reaction that she had to Kris. We lead the way past the glass double doors into one of our sitting rooms. There is a massive couch that was made to fit all of us but it is not big enough for me to be far enough away from those mutts, which leaves me standing against the wall along with Kai and Tao. Lay is sitting on the far edge of the couch away from where the strangers sit with Baekhyun next to him. Kris is standing in the middle of the room looming over the strangers as the pup settles deep into the couch while the others are sitting on the edge. We are going to have to clean the whole thing to get their scent out of here.

“Now please explain what happened to our mate,” Lay says politely.

“She had a panic attack,” The leader, Namjoon responds. “She has them every once a while but this is her second one in two days and that has never happened before.”

“Why does she have them?” Baek wonders.

The second in command answers this one, “Usually it’s because of something that reminds her of something brutal that happened in our past. But these ones are most likely from the stress of meeting you guys.”

“I’m very curious what kind of past she has,” Kris sighs as he begins to pace, never taking his eyes off our mate. “What were you doing in that village that night? The blood red army was there, were you residence of that village who happened to escape?”

The group shares a look before letting the second continue to answer, “We were actually scouts for the blood red army.”

“What?” We all basically yell.

“They were the most brutal army in history, they have slaughtered thousands of innocent people and those they didn’t were forced to be sex slaves or soldiers,” Kris tells us.

Namjoon nods, “That was us.”

“What about our mate?” I choke out. It is a hard question to get out when I’m horrified of the answer. We are all on edge as we wait for one of them to say something.

“She was with us, that is why we call her hyung, she has spent her whole life as a boy,” One of the younger ones say.

I let out a breath I didn’t even know I was holding, “For how long?”

“About seventy years with the army before you guys wiped them out but she was so used to it that she didn’t want to go back to being a normal girl. That is one of the things I really want you explain to you,” The second glances at our mate with a soft gaze. “She is not a normal omega you are going to have to realize that you can not treat her like one.”

“What do you mean? You want us to act as if she is an alpha?” Kai scoffs.

“Yes I do. Because in her mind she is an alpha and if you want her not to run away within the first two days you can’t treat her like a fragile omega. She has been through wars and dealt with some horrible things, she is a warrior. If you are affectionate with her you should know that she will not respond properly right away. She hasn’t received kindness from anyone but us so having it come from someone else is going to be different.”

“How many of there are you?” Another asks.

“Twelve,” Kris answers.

The man’s eyes go wide, “And all of you are her mates?”

We nod but Kris responds, “We are assuming so. The little whiffs we are getting from the pup confirm that the six of us are.”

“If I can suggest something,” The second interjects.

“Might as well, I’m not really sure how to handle something like this,” Kris admits. He’s right, none of us are built to deal with stuff like this. We had always assumed our mate would appear and be a sweet, normal little omega that would be the perfect little mate but now I’m not so sure what fate has in store for us anymore. The more we learn about her the more frightened I become, what if I can’t take care of her? She has been through so much for an omega, and from what I’ve noticed she needs a lot of care.

“When are the others coming back?”

“Tomorrow.”

“When they come back, introduce her to them one by one, all of them at once will be way too much for her and without us here I don’t know how she will react. For tonight, after we leave have her spend time with just one of you so she can have a solid connection with at least one of you.”

Kris cocks a brow at him, “Why just one of us?”

“It gives her someone to lean on, someone solid for her to go to if she feels overwhelmed. When she feels that way or scared she likes to hide her face in your neck so she can get better access to your scent. That is what usually calms her down.”

Baekhyun snickers, “Who should it be?”

“Obviously me, as head alpha I can protect her the best,” Kris snaps.

The second quickly shakes his head, “Anyone but you.”

“Why?”

“Because she associates your scent right now with the day you tackled her and bit me and she gets really scared when the memory pops us, if I had to pick someone it would probably be this new one,” He points to Lay.

“Why him?” Baekhyun, Tao, Kai and I all demand together.

He rolls his eyes at us, “Because when she thinks of the first time she caught your scent she will think of you threatening to slaughter us and kidnapping her favorite pup. This guy so far has no bad connection to his scent. He is probably our safest bet.”

Kris sighs and runs his hand threw his hair once again, “Any thing else you need to tell us or any other suggestions?”

“Actually yes,” Namjoon buts in, “I would like to suggest visitation, cutting off all connection with her will be stressful for her and my pack.”

Kai is quick to shut that idea down, “You’ve got to be kidding me, absolutely not.”

“Kai,” Kris warns.

“You can’t seriously be considering this, they are just going to take her away. What in the world would make you think this is a good idea?”

“The fact that our mate basically needs directions to take care of her. She is not a stable person, she will need all the stability she can get to get used to living with us. I do not want her hating us for cutting off her pack. As head alpha I’m okaying this. You will have one hour with her every day until I know she is used to all of us. There is a cabin you guys can stay at in the southern corner of our property until then, after that you are gone, got it?”

“Got it.”