#in/for what situation do you think laurent asked him about the things damen likes?

[laurent-ofvere]

Rereading the training of Erasmus and I think Erasmus would’ve been able to describe everyone in detail had we gotten more of his pov. I wonder what he thought of Laurent’s appearance. I would love to have read their conversation bc it’s very obvious that Laurent asked Erasmus about what Damianos liked (as in his favorite epics, and stuff not the sexual stuff)

ugh dude YES!! I really enjoy the training of erasmus bc honestly I feel like we got more overall descriptions and little insights on all these things in that one short story than we did in the entire trilogy

[magiclamd]

I’ve been thinking of that scene, between Laurent and Torveld, in the first book.

Torveld is trying to make Laurent feel special, saying it’s been years since a young man distracted him, and Laurent brushes it off with “I think you get distracted more easily than you admit.” We know Damen reads what happens there as Laurent trying to manage a difficult situation, but actually, this scene plays out in the opposite way to so many flirting scenes that happen later, between Damen and Laurent. Instead of managing what is indeed a difficult situation, and trying to keep Damen both close but also at bay, like he should have if he had been trying to manipulate Damen, Laurent is usually both the initiator but also the one who pushes things further and further. When he flirts with Damen, it’s nothing like what he does there with Torveld. He’s honest, he’s teasing, he lets himself be himself because there’s no way it can be used by his uncle against him. 

There’s only really one time when Laurent is the one who pulls the plug on the flirting, rather than Damen, and it’s when he asks Damen to teach him how he’s supposed to instruct a bed slave. Damen skates the thin ice until he then, for some reason, goes “fuck it” and right as he has his hands in Laurent’s clothing, lets his voice drop and starts to make a suggestion that Laurent doesn’t even let him finish, in his panic. Laurent doesn’t deal with it diplomatically; he tells Damen to step back. Damen suggests he go and get some firewood; Laurent tells him, "Go.” 

But the thing with that balcony scene with Torveld, that both Torveld and Damen miss: Laurent speaks of Torveld’s attraction to him as though it has nothing to do with himself. It’s not even wrong; Laurent is very pretty and Torveld likes pretty young men. It could be any pretty young man. Laurent substitutes a convenient slave, and Torveld is happy.

It’s the absolute opposite for Damen. “It’s different with everyone”, he doesn’t even say to Laurent, when they’re talking about what sex is like, because he thinks it’s so obvious. For Laurent, who watches himself replaced with pre-pubescent child after child, again and again, the fact that Damen knows the very worst bits of Laurent inside and out, and has suffered from them, and yet wants him; that Damen can pre-empt his needs, even before he realises them; that he watched Damen refuse to fuck by the coupling fire, and the slaves once he’s back in his rightful place, and didn’t even think twice about how much he could have had the adoring Pallas, means something to Laurent. 

To Damen, Laurent is not replaceable. 

I just love the way this series plays out similar scenes again and again, and the differences are what shows us where the characters and the relationships are. 

[thickenmyblood]

hi maca!! can’t believe hiuh finally ended, thank you for all your hard work! i was wondering if you could say more about what were the “wrong aspects” that laurent liked about maxime? also very curious in general about what paschal thought about laurent being with maxime or getting back together with damen. thanks!!

hi there!!! so, i didn't write maxime as a villain or anything in this fic so I don't want anyone reading this to think that he's Mr. Evil or a literal step-in for Laurent's uncle.

having said that, I love the idea of maxime toeing the line, you know? like he's not abusive but he's not attentive either. he's Into the Patriarchy (TM) in a different way than Damen, so not only does he not think to ask what laurent likes in bed or what his limits are, but he also has a rougher approach to sex (think typical porn video titles, "likes it rough" vibes, maaaaybe refuses to wear a condom like nicaise implied throughout the fic and laurent never denied).

so the "wrong" aspects laurent might have liked about maxime have to do with not having to really think around him (not bc l's being vulnerable, but bc he just disconnects and dissociates from the entire situation.) see: they go out for dinner, he doesn't even have to pick a place bc maxime will do it, doesn't have to pick a dish bc maxime will do it, doesn't have to think about sex positions bc maxime will just jostle them both into what he likes, etc. aaaand last but not least, laurent likes that it hurts. it's a form of self punishment, too. "you THOUGHT you could have nice things? you thought sex with people who aren't damen was going to be good? ha" and, later on, when he starts realizing damen is changing and getting better every day and growing, it turns into "this is your reminder that you fucked up".

: ) hope this was interesting to read!!!! thank you sm for the question!!!! 

[wimbledon2008]

so i just finished the captive prince series about a week ago and am rereading it now. just finished the hello lover scene and honestly im still so confused over what's going on in laurent's head lmao like??

was he previously compartmentalizing his resentment so well that real feelings developed, but now he finally has a chance to truly let his anger out, he's locking down the positive feelings?

was he being truthful about manipulating damen the whole time (highly unlikely to me)? or was the cruelty in and of itself a play, either to push damen away despite not actually wanting to, or some other convoluted reason? bc damen really would have done anything he asked, trying to outmaneuver him like that was unnecessary.

my first theory feels the most right to me, and he just needed more time to process and purge his desire for revenge but idk im a taurus and very akielon coded. i love laurent but i do not understand that man lol

okay, disclaimer, i haven't read the books in quite some time so this probably isn't the fullest or deepest analysis. i welcome any additions or corrections from those who are better at meta than me <3

so the hello lover scene is incredibly complex and nuanced, a standard of pacat's writing that makes his works so infinitely re-readable. based on my personal understanding of the scene, there are a few key things that help to explain why laurent behaves the way he does in the tent scene:

1. laurent needs damen and the akielons to win against his uncle, which he very much wants to do. charcy didn't go how he'd originally planned, and he knows damen is pissed about it and probably thinks the worst of laurent right now - that he intentionally abandoned the akielons at charcy for his own purposes. so laurent is being manipulative; he is trying to outmaneuver damen. because what damen says is true: laurent has no allies, no friends, he's ruined his reputation by aligning himself with akielos, etc. we as the readers know that damen cares deeply for laurent and wouldn't just abandon him, and if laurent simply explained what happened and asked damen to help him, damen wouldn't hesitate to stay at his side. but laurent doesn't think damen has any reason to trust him, so laurent can't trust damen either. so instead of being honest, he chooses to be cold-blooded, to assert control over the situation and force damen's hand to ensure that the alliance he worked so hard to establish stays intact. he could've just asked, but this is laurent, and there are other factors at play, such as the fact that

2. laurent is already in love with damen by the tent scene, or at least most of the way there. but laurent can no longer pretend damen is anyone other than the person who killed his brother. damen walks into that tent as prince damianos, in full akielon regalia, covered in blood, with a sword. laurent has been doing some aggressive compartmentalizing, especially in order to have allowed himself to sleep with damen. who killed his brother, which was the inciting incident that made laurent's life a living hell. laurent has not forgiven damen for auguste, and he's having to really confront that hatred and anger for maybe the first time since the first book. and laurent is also punishing himself for caring for and sleeping with damen, his brother's killer. can you even imagine? it's better not to. laurent probably hates himself as much as he hates damianos in that moment. so he shoves all those glimmering, positive feelings down because he wants to hurt damen, and himself too. and none of this is particularly rational because

3. laurent is very upset at the beginning of king's rising. this is an understatement. he's still reeling from nicaise's death, which he blames himself for, he's losing damen, the only person he trusted, he was recently stabbed, and everything is spiraling out of his tightly held control. and when laurent is upset he's cruel. he's not at his best in the tent scene. he's clinging to his own self-preservation, and he's making it up as he goes along because whatever his original plan was got blown to hell, which is clear because he's saying shit that doesn't even make sense. see, e.g., this post about him allegedly enduring damen's "fumbling attentions" to win a battle he didn't even know about at the time. while laurent is being cold and ruthless to secure his position as best he can (see no. 1), he's also acting from a place of emotion instead of strict rationality, which is how he typically operates, and how he prefers to act. he's on the defensive, he's deeply confused and unable to cope with all of his conflicting feelings about damen, and he's lashing out - protecting himself before damen can hurt him first. and then damen literally sticks his thumb in his stab wound. basically: our boy laurent's going through it in a major way.

going back and re-reading your message i realize i've essentially just reiterated everything you initially said but with a lot of extra words. so i guess the long and short of it is: you're right. honestly there are so many ways to interpret the tent scene and everything else laurent says and does, which is what makes him so fascinating! so thanks for giving me the opportunity to dive back into his psyche for a little while <3

[makedonsgriva]

Hi, do you mind if I ask, what do you think are Damen and Laurent’s greatest personality strengths and weaknesses? Why? What do you love about their dynamic? Thanks if you want to answer....

HI! Thanks for this ask because I have SO MANY thoughts, feelings and emotions about these two princes, it will take a lifetime for me to get it all out of my brain. Anyways, here we go:

Damen

In my opinion I think Damen's greatest personality strength is his unwavering optimism, will power and courage. Man was shipped to the enemy nation as a slave to his biggest enemy and he came back to his own nation to fight for his right with the said enemy ending up as his lover???? I don't think anyone understands the sheer INSANITY of this situation. Like I am being 200% honest here, I would have survived not a day in Vere had I been in Damen's position so y'know I gotta admire my man's sheer power of will and courage and hope.

As for his greatest weakness I feel like it can be attributed to his impulsiveness. Once angered, it is very difficult for him to assess the situation and take action calmly. He is hot headed and violent. And we see this impulsiveness of him getting him in trouble multiple times in the series.

Laurent

I think it's easy to say his biggest strength is that beautiful, boggling, labyrinthine brain of his. Laurent is smart. And when I say smart, I mean every letter of it. He uses his wits, he relies on his cleverness and he is not afraid to play dirty to win unlike his righteous husband. He knows that to fight twisted and sick people like his uncle, he has to come up with more twisted plans of his own. You gotta love a smart motherfucker.

His greatest weakness has to be his complete inability to ask for help and rely on others. Although I can't completely blame Laurent for this since as soon as Auguste died, he found himself surrounded by people who only wanted to take advantage of him. He HAD to be self reliant. Yet, just when I started to believe that he might be starting to trust Damen to take his help and win alongside him, he turned himself in to his uncle in Kings Risng lmaoo like I get the self sacrifice and there was no other way or what not but jfc my dude you don't have to do everything by yourself.

Lamen

Every other book I have read has rivals or maybe like one of them dislikes the other while the other person is "I never actually hated you." And I get the charm of it okay, I love that trope too but Captive Prince? The enemies to lovers we get is ELITE. We go from two dudes wanting to VISCERALLY end each other to ready to die for each other. From the absolute hatred, lack of trust, various murder and torture attempts to forgiving each other and falling in love. Realising that whatever the other did was justified and the only thing they can do is move past it. Overcoming all that hurt and pain to build something so strong, beautiful and intimate. That's THE SHIT okay. That's what makes Laurent and Damen's dynamic so special. The way they both grow together and come together to become an unstoppable force. They help each other so much, both in terms of achieving their respective goals and to have great character developments. They bring out the best in each other and fill in the weaknesses of the other. Damen is impulsive but Laurent knows how to reign him in. Laurent doesn't know how to accept help but Damen is there for him every step of the way. From reluctant allies to friends to lovers to divorced era to I'm gonna die for this man, they have it all. Captive Prince has the BEST enemies to lovers arc of all the books I've read till date. PERIOD.

This really got me yapping I'm sorry lmao!!! But yeah here we go. Hope you liked this!

[kybelles]

hi love! I'm feeling devious so for the choose violence asks, 24 and 25

HIII BABY 💞💞 i sincerely hope you don’t mind me answering everything via your ask 🥹 i just didn’t want to spam the tl with my non-stop posting!

1.the character everyone gets wrong

JOKASTE!!! 😩 sooo many times in fan creations she’s a mustache twirling villain and look i get it! she needs to go in order to lamen to be together but i don’t know why each time she needs to cheat on damen…. people can break up for other reasons yk…..

i feel like people don’t really get how much jokaste holds damen in such a high regard. the first time she talked to laurent she was full of praises for damen and yes although the majority of the reason was to taunt laurent, it was too heartfelt to be faked entirely. i find her a quite tragic character honestly. in another world she would be proud and happy to be to be damen’s queen 🙁 i wish more ppl cared about her OR stop portraying her as this cold unfeeling girlboss who was sooo sick of damen’s bs that she punished him by gleefully fucking kastor….. i really really don’t think that’s who she is. she loved damen in her own way. she was also a sentimental woman. (her last letter to damen will never make me not emotional….)

3.screenshot or description of the worst take you've seen on tumblr

SCREENSHOT OMG hats off to any brave soul who actually posts it….. also the collection on bad takes is so rich idk what to choose… ok i got one: so i genuinely don’t remember the details but a few years ago there was a post circulating about how laurent was actually Good All Along (yes even in book one where he drugged damen and then threw him into a rape ring and also had him whipped after intentionally setting him up 🙂 ) and it had so many likes…. i’ll never ever understand the need to whitewash book 1 laurent’s actions. like why do you even stan a controversial character if you don’t like his controversial aspects…. i really believe this is quite the disservice to such a multidimsensional character like laurent. :/

7.what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how the fandom acts about them?

hmm i wouldn’t say hate but some posts i read about auguste made me sorta dislike him  😬 idk when and where i read it but there was one post in particular that said they wish auguste would come back to life and beat the shit out of damen and i was like WOAHHH??? you want the mc (who you spent three books with) to be beaten brutally by some canon fodder?? for what crime???  i was honestly weirded out.

there’s also the fact that i genuinely HATE l*uguste (despite not being an anti shipper in general or anything! this ship just rubs me the worst way bc laurent experienced so much trauma from the way ppl made up incest rumors about him and auguste) so any interpretation (even if they aren’t written as a romantic pair intentionally) where auguste and laurent have this unhealthy codependent bond with auguste acting like a ferocious caveman to any potential romantic suitor of laurent and laurent being all meek and allowing this treatment is a big no for me. ✋ so yes even tho i don’t hate auggie boy i can’t say i care a great deal about him. sorry baby i’m sure you are just dandy.

8. common fandom opinion that everyone is wrong about

that damen is an unreliable narrator 😩i talked about it in my previous post!

12.the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them

EGERIA THE MF QUEEN OF AKIELOS 🗣️🗣️ i actually like every member of the akielos trio (theomedes-hypermenestra-egeria) sm because their situation reminds me of turkish harem dramas. 🤭 the lack of canon information about them allows me to make various hcs and backstories and idk i just think it’s fun!

13.worst blorboficiation

JFC i’m SOOOO old i’m ANCIENT bc i have no idea what this means….. i’d be happy to answer it if you give me some clarification (hiding my face in shame)

16. you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc)

oh luckily i already answered it here!

17.there should be more of this type of fic/art

I’m always a huge advocate for bottomianos even though i myself shamefully haven’t made a contribution 💔 as for art i’m beyond grateful for our wonderful artists and i humbly would like to see more of the old gang! (theo, egeria, aleron, hennike etc.)

21.part of canon you think is overhyped

hmm i unfortunately can’t think of an answer for this one, i’m sorry!

24.topic that brings up the most rancid discourse

OH DEAR… so one of the first times i actively participated in the fandom i made a post about how frustrating it was to see theomedes portrayed as an absent father despite the glaring lack of canon evidence while aleron got off the hook much easier despite laurent actually confirming he was an absentee and said i think it was about the way people perceive them (theomedes=brown and toxic, aleron=white and tastefully distant) anyways, some user whom i never talked to before (and they’re still blocked to this day despite the fact i pretty much never block anyone here) said i was “making it up” and right after i blocked them after they continued talking to me in a very rude manner some asks ✨mysteriously✨ appeared in my inbox and the person who sent them called me an “illiterature white bitch” who made up nonexistent drama…….. so yes i guess the colorism issue really ruffles some people’s feathers :) i wonder why :) 

25. common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing

“why didn’t damen figure out the regent’s abuse of laurent sooner is he stupid” setting aside the 574619 different pacat interviews where she talks about how damen needed to be oblivious bc otherwise laurent would never open up to him, why is it so wild to think damen wouldn’t assume the regent would do something like that to his own nephew? as if the entire canon events didn’t happen bc damen believed families would never hurt each other…. just wow

[rosyandraw]

Hi I love you. I’ve been carefully waiting for you to update 🤍 but also I do have a question! I noticed that you made Damen a Scorpio, and Laurent a Taurus in NMFY. Was this intentional? Because I saw on capri twt someone made a timeline to show Damen & Lauren’s 6 year age gap, and their most likely birthday. And Damen being a Scorpio and Laurent being a Taurus totally fits 😭🤍 In case it was totally intentional and you wrote it based on the books, you’re absolutely brilliant and I love you more. I wanted to know whether you’re into zodiac and have opinion to their zodiac compatibility pairing

I LOVE THIS AND I LOVE YOU FOR ASKING (also I just updated when I said I was going to lmao, for once!)

Sorry my answer is so long. But here is my essay on Scorpio Damen and Scorpio/Taurus compatibility.

I haven't seen the timeline, so I did it based on the books and then my own opinion of their characters. I'm really into astrology. I'm into spiritualism too and I'm an eclectic neopagan (not that you asked lmao)

Laurent is late spring, so can only really be a Taurus or a Gemini based on the information we're given in the books. And I think Taurus is more Laurent's vibe.

We know they're 20 and 25 during the books which kicks off around June time but by Marlas, which would have been early spring/March Damen was already 19 and Laurent was approaching 14. So Damen's birthday has to be later than September as the books only span 3 months (being generous) but before Spring (battle at marlas).

Then it was just a matter of deciding what I felt vibed best with what we know of them. I toyed with a few for Damen but none of them felt right -Capricorn, Sag, Libra- they just don't fit him very well.

I think Damen fits a Scorpio for so many reasons, mostly because they're incredibly deep but don't really show it. They're charismatic people quite naturally but they can also be ruthless. They're also -like Taurus- extremely loyal.

Scorpio people feel very deeply, they can be great leaders, resourceful, passionate when something is important to them, they love challenges and tend to be fucking fearless when they see obstacles.

You’re probably thinking "but Scorpios are manipulators" and yes. They can be and I would argue that Damen isn’t the kind of person that manipulates on purpose but, as with most scorpio’s, he is charming when he wants to be and often charming people don’t recognise their influence on the people around them. He is also smart and strategic and his manner of looking at things coupled with a natural charisma often influences situations and the people around him without him purposefully thinking let me manipulate this. Manipulation doesn’t always equal sneaky, sometimes it references a natural sway and I think Scorpio is often this kind of person. Especially because they are almost always confident they are right and confidence is everything when you’re influencing a situation or person, whether you know it or not.

Scorpio is often calm and collected. They feel deeply but don’t show it the way you associate with the other water signs. They can be violent when pushed and can be relentless with it, whether it’s a physical fight, a slanging match, or a cause they believe in Scorpio is IMPOSSIBLE to fight with. They keep their heads, they aren’t prone to lashing out or to displays of emotion but they can and will absolutely ruin you if you get them there. If they were a sin I’d say it might be Pride.

We know from Canon Damen is very cool and collected in high stress situations. He compartmentalises to a fault, he doesn’t EVER let his situation get the better of him in terms of his emotions. I am talking explicitly about his ability to keep his shit together when in fight or flight and his decision making ability in high stress situations. And of course his penchant for not letting himself feel the horror and sadness of everything that has happened: Kastor, Jokaste, his dad dying, being stabbed by his brother, the post, Ancel etc.

He feels it very deeply but he doesn’t let it show, he doesn’t let it rule him and he doesn’t acknowledge it pretty much all the way through the books.

Scorpio is deeply self aware (not always emotionally) and there isn’t a single instance in the book where Damen doubts himself. Not even in chains. He doesn’t even really doubt Laurent even when Laurent throws test after test at him. There’s a loyalty and surety there.

In terms of sex and romance scorpio is the sign of sexuality which matches nice with Taurus because they are the sign of sensuality. We know Damen’s only two outlets in terms of his emotions are fighting and fucking. He is a deeply DEEPLY sexual person and he has so much passion in him that he literally walks into the lions den with an I love you and some big fucking balls. Like??? Who else but a scorpio would have the AUDACITY to do that shit?

Prone to one-night stands and expression through their bodies Scorpios will only truly be satisfied when they find the ONE which again -so is Taurus. And when they do they are loyal and passionate and tend to spend their teen years and 20s being fuck-boys and hoes until they realise they want more.

Sound familiar? The second Damen fucks Laurent there is no going back for him because he’s found the person that can satisfy both his intense needs: sex and the emotional intimacy he’d been craving (but ignoring) his whole life.

When Scorpio’s find the one they want the literally merge their lives and hearts and become the power couple WE kind of people.

Intelligent, loyal, strategic, dedicated to the people they care about, they work well under pressure, are focused, resourceful and hardworking. They enjoy the chase; they are competitive and they like a little mystery in their romance. When in love they are unshakeable and loyal and passionate above all else. Their kind of love can be too intense for most people but Taurus WANTS that security and the assurance, Taurus thrives on being the centre of someone’s world and no other zodiac sign will do it quite as well as Scorpio

Taurus and Scorpio have a lot of sexual energy between them and natural compatibility. So I think it makes a lot of sense, Laurent and Damen's chemistry on page is stellar and it is INSTANT.

I think any time I read an enemies to lovers I assume they have birth charts that are compatible because Love and Hate are so closely aligned. Hate is such a passionate sentiment, I don't think it's possible that two people like that don't have some natal compatibility/facets that make for glorious tension.

Anyway, sorry for the ramble and thank you for this because it was so so much fun to word vomit about it haha! 💕💕

[dreamdropxoxo]

Hi,.....if you don't mind me asking, can I ask your top 5 (or top 3) favorite characters from Captive Prince trilogy? And why do you love them? And your top 5 favorite moments from the novels? Sorry if you've answered this question before....Thanks....

Hello lovely!

Thank you so much for your ask and sorry that it took me some time to actually answer. Currently, I'm not able to invest as much time into my writing and blog as I'd like. 😩

My answer is so freaking long, I'm so sorry 😂

To answer your question, and be prepared for the disappointment 😂, I'm not very inventive. My favourite characters are:

Damen -> I simply love him as a character because he actually goes through a deep and difficult development. His starting point is a very black/white worldview. For him, there are only good and bad people, nothing in between. Circumstances don't matter to him and he has absolutely no empathy for the powerless. Not in a spiteful manner or in a I-don't-care-about-the-"good"-weak like Erasmus, but as in he never was powerless and has absolutely no idea what that does to people and how that can influence people to do "bad" things. He was never really desperate in this ugly, I'd-do-anything-to-get-out-of-this-situation kind of way. So, he doesn't understand how some people can let that influence them and that makes him an asshole to people who are not in his "good" corner. He's judgmental and arrogant and his charm and physical power seem to support him in everything he does and says. However, as the story progresses, I think his simple, and somewhat childish, worldview gets shattered, most of all by Laurent himself, who he had firmly placed in the "bad" corner but manages to get out of this place in Damen's mind slowly but surely until he comes to love him with a depth he had never experienced before. That he can admit that he changed his mind on some things and people and would handle some things differently shows a strength of character lots of people don't have and I admire that deeply.

Laurent -> I've been at the point many readers have been probably in that I didn't like him at first. Damen's viewpoint influenced me so badly that I disliked Laurent a lot at first. And then everything changed. Laurent came to be one of my most admired characters in media. His mind, his perseverance and his humanity made him a beloved figure in my heart. He's such a sweet and caring person, driven to the very edge by his uncle, greed of others and loneliness and yet, he fights with everything he has, protects the people he can protect. He humbles himself, he endures the discomfort that comes with being the "bad" guy and "useless" heir to the throne as his uncle makes him out to be, he doesn't allow himself to give up although that would have been easier. For me, he is one of the strongest characters I've read about. He displays an ability for forgiveness I admire a lot, especially considering how often he was hurt and betrayed by others. Forgiving someone and seeing them for who they really are, after having a very clear picture of them because they hurt you badly (like Damen hurt Laurent), is one of the absolutely hardest things imaginable. For me, Laurent is a deeply inspiring character.

Nikandros -> My reasons for liking Nikandros are much simpler 😂. Nikandros' loyalty towards Damen made me adore him, his plain view of Damen's failures made me love him. Why? Well, first of all, Nik isn't in a position where he needs Damen's favour or where Damen rescued him from less fortunate circumstances. Nik is one of the most powerful men in the kingdom by his own right. His loyalty to Damen comes from mutual respect and love and I absolutely love that (yes, I'm a big fan of friendships xD). And yet I believe that Nik is one of the few people who don't hero-worship Damen but sees his flaws. He's stubborn and prejudiced but mostly because he saw Damen do one stupid thing after the other while ignoring his advice at every turn. Imagine having a friend who does stupid shit and you tell them they're doing stupid shit and they do the stupid shit even harder just because? I mean honestly, I admire Nik a great deal.

Jokaste -> Aw yes, Jokaste, she's great. Woman in a man's man's world... So much potential, so much greatness, so much intelligence, but no possibility to achieve the things she wanted to achieve by her own simply because of her gender. As a result, instead of giving up, she decides to do something about it and if people get hurt/are a means to an end, then so be it. It's not as if she got spared hurt and disappointment. I totally stan a woman like her.

My favorite scenes:

When Damen throws his freaking sword to save Laurent. I mean the visual alone!!!

The scene where Laurent confronts Aimeric with his treachery. Goodness, the emotions. I'm going to freaking die.

The scene where Laurent kills a man with a chair (badassery at its finest)

The Okton (does this even need words?)

The moment where Damen almost fainted because Laurent put his boot on his chest in bed? Yeah the good shit xD

I loved this ask so much (I could have rambled on forever) but I think I have to stop here otherwise you will be bored to death 😂. How about you? What are your favourite characters and scenes?

[gildedgaze]

Just want to say, thank you for your blog and fanfics....Love reading them....

If you don't mind, can I ask something from Captive Prince? What do you think are Laurent and Damen's greatest personality strengths and weaknesses? Why? What do you love about their dynamic? Sorry if you've answered these questions before.....Thanks......

Aw this is so sweet😍 Thank you so so much for reading my work! 🥰🥰🥰

Ou, I have not yet answered these fantastic questions!

Hmmm,

I think my favourite thing about Damen is his fierce loyalty and conviction when it comes to what he considers wrong and right. I think the latter is both a weakness and strength.

His loyalty extends in so many instances; like when he chose to fight at Charcy and meet up with Laurent at the end of Prince's Gambit, beginning of King' Rising. He had every liberty to leave, but didn't. The way he professed Laurent's innocence before his trial in Ios. Such a loyal, loving man, i melt. We must recall, 'I think if I gave you my heart, you would treat it tenderly' 😭🥺😩💛 SIR. I WISH A MAN IRL WOULD. 

In terms of seeing situations in a sort or black and white, right/wrong, the very reason Jokaste felt the need to send him to Vere (and may i add ✨SAVE HIM✨ from Kastor) was that he refused to believe his brother was capable of such evil (Patricide), even when Nikandros insisted his brother had it out for him, and believed the throne was rightfully his. Damianos' loyalty and blinded innocence and rejection of blurred lines are my fave character traits.

What I love most about Laurent is his reputation of being frigid/cast-iron bitch, and his intelligence. Such a stellar combination if you ask me 😂✨ Of course we know his demeanour is a coping mechanism as a result of his abusive childhood, but God, do i love smooth-talkers and people who are one step ahead, most esp in the context of political intrigue. 'It was like watching a man smile as he surrendered himself to drown in deep water' IM SORRY CAN U JUST ENVISION HOW CHARMING LAURENT CAN TRULY BE IN THE CONTEXT OF COURT. 

Laurent being bookish was something alluded to in book one, and I love expanding on that facet of him within my fics! I'm an avid reader and any character who loves reading, i usually love too!! 📚💛

Ugh and their dynamic, where to start??? I think their biggest appeal as a pairing is the way that they're such opposites, and as they say, opposites attract. Pacat has taken the concept of 'enemies to lovers' and turned it on its head!! If you really think about it, it is crazily illicit to find yourself in love with the person who murdered such an integral figure in your life, a brother. That illicitness makes their dynamic so delicious and appealing, it’s like, their history is so messy but that’s what makes it also beautiful...

Also, there's another wonderful post floating around here on Tumblr which addresses the way that Damen can have sex with many people and not get emotionally invested, while Laurent, of course, is the opposite. When I first read the series, I found that there was something about reading their sex scenes which feel almost uncomfortably intimate, like I was watching in one something I shouldn't, because of Laurent's pure vulnerability.

GOD I LOVE THEM SO MUCH! 😭😭

Thanks for asking me this, my lovely!

(My inbox is always open to chat about capri xx)

[laurentspup]

17. “I’m pretty sure she/he’s my soulmate.” but NOT a soulmate au 😈

Hi anon!!!!!! i'm so so sooooo sorry for making you wait so long because I have no time management skills whatsoever but no matter what, I do and I will get things done!!!

Just wanted to tell you I had so much fun with this one especially wracking my brain to decipher "but NOT a soulmate au" lol. I hope this is what you meant by that??? But if it isn't... i actually have another idea for this same prompt which I will be writing too because why not!! But for now, I hope this makes you and everyone who will read happy!!!!

Fluff Prompts from this list. Asks are open if anyone still wants to send prompts. It will take me forever but I will get them done!

Enjoyyyyyyyy

17.

“I’m pretty sure he’s my soulmate,” Damen says, staring at the most gorgeous blonde sitting at the far end of the bar counter.

“I’m pretty sure you’re drunk as fuck,” Nikandros answers him and takes a swig of the scotch he’s been holding since the beginning of the night.

“No, you don’t understand,” Damen says after he takes a shot. His… third? He’s not sure. “We’re meant to be.”

Nikandros shakes his head at his best friend. He looks at Damen as if he is insane, which, Damen thinks, might be right.

The blonde he thinks is his soulmate is Auguste’s younger brother. Auguste, technically his boss and business partner. Though they have been friends since their high school years and their families have been close for a long time, he knows there is an unwritten rule somewhere that dating a friend’s younger brother is… not encouraged. Unless Damen wants to be punched.

Maybe he wants to be punched.

But he can never do that to a friend. He shouldn’t. Then again, it is Laurent, and Laurent is all he ever wanted.

And now, after a few drinks and seeing Laurent talk to Torveld, Damen cannot, will not contain his feelings anymore.

“I’m telling him today,” Damen declares after another shot.

Nikandros snickers. Damen pushes him with a little more strength than he intended. Nikandros pushes him back, but it isn’t enough to make him fall off the bar chair.

“You’re telling him today?” Nikandros is mocking him.

“Yes,” Damen answers like Nikandros is a child. “Today’s the day I make Laurent want me back.”

Damen stands and shakes his head and body. He prepares as if he is about to enter a boxing ring, which, he thinks with a shudder, is accurate.

Nikandros shakes with laughter on his seat. Damen doesn’t know how this situation is laughable, but he ignores him. Honestly, he’s tired of Nikandros’s negativity tonight, but he doesn’t care anymore. He’ll deal with Nikandros after he kisses the blonde beauty talking to his brother.

Right. His brother, Auguste. Auguste, technically Damen’s boss.

He’ll cross that bridge he’s about to burn when he gets there.

Auguste sees Damen approaching and waves. Damen nods to him and smiles, hiding the buzzing nerves threatening to consume him. When he arrives, Auguste pats him on the back and he stumbles. That pat is a little too hard. It’s a bad sign. Shit.

“Alright, I’m just going to the restroom,” Auguste tells both of them, staring at the direction of the bathroom.

“Funny, I just saw Nikandros walk to the restroom,” Laurent says with a knowing tone.

Damen watches Laurent’s face as he teases his brother. He is intoxicated in those blue eyes, the way they twinkle in delight at his brother’s discomfort. His luscious, pink mouth is in a smirk, teasing, happy, and content. God, Damen wants to kiss those lips until they’re even pinker and smiling for him and because of him.

“Ha ha.” Auguste is unamused. “I’ll be back,” he says and slowly walks away.

“It’s a one person restroom, you know?” Laurent shouts and Auguste glares. “Use a condom!”

“Shut up!” Laurent cackles as Auguste disappears from view.

Damen slides in next to him. Laurent is as gorgeous as ever. He’s wearing a sparkly, dark blue top with a plunging neckline, oddly familiar to Damen. The top is accentuating Laurent’s pale skin color. Despite the glitters and shiny sequins, it is Laurent who glows in Damen’s eyes.

“Hey,” Damen starts, with, he’s certain, the biggest, dumbest smile on his face.

“Hey,” Laurent says back, staring at him with eyebrows raised.

Damen is a little afraid of that look. His heart pounds against his chest. Bad signs. Bad signs everywhere.

“You look so pretty today,” Damen still continues, voice impossibly dreamy.

“You already told me that,” Laurent tells him, eyebrows furrowed. He looks confused, as if Damen is lying to him. Laurent’s standoffishness is messing up Damen’s game, but he wills himself to power through.

“I did?” Damen asks, genuinely confused. “Well, I thought I should tell you again.” He smiles, hoping his charms on full blast would work on Laurent.

“Why are you here?” Laurent answers instead, and Damen’s smile falters. “Weren’t you having a conversation with Nik?”

“Yeah…” Damen sighs, honestly hurt that Laurent is being distant already. “But he was being annoying.”

Laurent snorts. “He’s like that everyday,” he says matter of factly. “What’s he being so anal about this time?” He picks up his drink and puts the rim of the glass in his mouth to take a sip. God, why can’t that glass be Damen?

Damen chuckles. “Well he is getting anal right now so…”

Laurent shows a hint of a smile behind the glass. “Was that it? He wanted some?”

“Nah. I told him I wanna tell you that I like you, but he just said it’s dumb.” Damen says casually, pretending he isn’t dropping a bomb on Laurent.

Laurent chokes on his drink. Damen wishes it’s his—

“You what?”

Was he angry? He sounded angry.

Damen gulps but still looks Laurent in the eye. “You didn’t know?” He’s still being casual, like his heart isn’t threatening to escape out of his chest. “I thought I was being obvious.”

“Damen—” Laurent doesn’t sound happy.

“Like genuinely.” Damen’s tone is serious, so Laurent knows he is serious. “I think you’re my soulmate. For real.”

“I’m not—”

“Look,” Damen interrupts, afraid of what Laurent is about to say before he could even pour his heart out. “Before you reject me—which I know you will—just hear me out, okay?”

“No, Damen, listen—”

“Please?” Damen throws in a pout he knows Laurent could never say no to.

“Okay.” Laurent sighs exasperated, but he doesn’t frown. Finally, a good sign.

Damen inhales. Exhales.

“Laurent.”

“Damen.” Laurent looks back at him. There is a hint of amusement in his voice. It annoys Damen a little, but who is he kidding? This is how he liked Laurent.

“I’ve liked you since…” Damen thinks about it for a second. “Forever.”

“Mhm.” Laurent nods. He looks like he doesn’t believe Damen, and that crushes Damen’s heart a little.

“I do,” Damen repeats. “I also genuinely believe you’re my soulmate—which is something you don’t believe in... or believe,” He says when he sees Laurent’s look. “But for me, that’s how I truly feel. Like… like all those times I was dating other girls it was like… I’ve never seen myself with them the way I see myself with you. You get me?”

Laurent shakes his head, his lips pursed. Damen wants to dig up a hole, shrivel, and die, but he started this and he has to end it. God, he hates it when Nikandros is right.

“I like you, Laurent. And I hope you give me a chance,” Damen says shakily. “But if you don't, it's cool.” He feigns relaxation when he is anything but.

Is it getting hot in here or—

“Damen, can I—” Laurent begins again, but Damen is too nervous to let him finish his rejection.

“AAAAND,” Damen interrupts once more. Laurent stops, annoyed. “If you don’t want to talk to me ever again, that’s fine. I’ll be sad but that’s fine. I’ll get over it. Like maybe after a really long time but I will get—”

“Damen.” Laurent says loudly and puts a hand on Damen’s mouth.

Damen’s eyes widen. He’d prefer a kiss as a way to stop him talking, but this is still physical contact, so Damen considers it a win. Laurent can’t resist his charms after all.

“How many shots of vodka did Nik force on you?”

“I don’t know... five?”

Laurent looks at him with eyebrows raised. He doesn’t believe Damen. “The truth.”

“Maybe more than that— I don’t know. Why are you asking me that? How is it connected to me liking you?” Damen asks, super confused.

Is this how Laurent flirts back? Did Damen do it then? Did the soulmate line work?

Laurent, incredibly, looks at Damen fondly.

“Babe,” Laurent says, tone serious.

“Babe?” Damen answers loudly.

“Sorry, did you want to be called my love? Darling? Honey?”

“What—”

Laurent laughs —he is so beautiful, Damen wants to be the reason that expression is painted on his face every single day.

“You’re so drunk,” Laurent says in between laughter.

“No!” Damen says defiantly. “I’m being serious here. Stop playing— stop laughing.”

Laurent laughs even harder. Damen can’t even get mad at him, because he’s happy he made Laurent happy.

Still, to Damen’s shock, Laurent takes his left hand in his, then raises both their hands, showing Damen matching rings on the fourth finger.

“Love, you're wasted. We’ve been married for two years.”

[fanficandtheories]

Let’s talk about Damen’s grief (Part two)

(Part one, part three)

There are all these moments in pg, where Damen is inevitably falling for Laurent and also denying himself any opportunity to mourn his father. Any instance where he is faced with his true identity, he takes the insults and the jeers that come along with it. He turns all of his grief into ambition. But there are still moments, when Damen comes face to face with how he really feels, friendless and grieving in a hostile country with nothing but flimsy hope to go back home. It’s so easy to forget that because of his can-do attitude and adaptability to hostile situations.

And then there is this! He said this in knowing Kastor threw him out, but he didn’t know Kastor killed his father. Ofc, Laurent had the pleasure of telling him that too, in between barbs about his barbarism.

It’s unfortunate if you don’t factor in Damen’s losses when you read the books. The tension is heightened because of this more than the lies and the attraction. It’s what makes Laurent and Damen stand on the same level. It begins ofc at Ravenel, when he apologises to Laurent (something Laurent never does later for the flogging or forcing Damen’s hand at Fortaine)

Damen felt Laurent’s grief, while belittling his own, apologising for it, feeling smaller with every thought of the past. Laurent was definitely falling too, but that did nothing for Damen’s grief. Not right away at least.

He never expects Laurent to respect him, or to love him for who he is, because clearly he stands there and takes Laurent’s scathing words about his father. But then, after Charcy, he learns that Laurent always knew who he was and Laurent pushes him away for who he is, makes him feel all the trepidation of their shared past. He never assigns a single piece of blame to Laurent, if anything, he internalizes all of the brutality. (He doesn’t even think of Arles and Laurent’s cruelty as things that have happened to him, when Nikandros asks!)

I’m so glad nikandros shows up at this point in the story because that’s the only comfort Damen can get. He literally goes out to say that friendship and loyalty feel new! He is the fucking rightful king who never did anything to deserve what he gets in life. He still moves for his throne and his home. The narration gets so depressing in these scenes even though the story progresses.

And then, and then!!!!

Jokaste! And her fucking child.

Damen fully feels the weight of his losses in that moment. The full spectrum of his loneliness. This scene was right after Kastor manipulating Damen’s reputation into patricide. He doesn’t expect Laurent to understand. Ofc not. Laurent never gave him a reason to think other wise when it came to Damen’s family. He literally reels back from Laurent like he won’t be able to handle whatever he’ll say! When Laurent shows up, he fully expects him to strategise past the missing son. But then everything changes✨😭💞❤️ the point of no return in their story. (Part three)

[damianosismyking]

from the prompt list: 3 or 6 for lamen :) love your writing sm!

Hello dear anon! Thank you so much for the prompts and kind words <3 Unfortunately, this turned out a little long. I hope you enjoy it anyway.

|Prompts chosen from this list! |

#3: “Come with me to the other room” – “We are not going to talk about this now.”

#6: “Here, take my jacket” – “I told you I’m not cold” *shivering*

~~

[1,9K words]

It had everything to be the perfect night, but of course, fucking Aimeric would ruin it.

Laurent had been impossible to convince, deadly opposed to getting out of the house unless it was indispensable, and more so getting out of the house to be somewhere loud and crowded.

In the end, Damen managed to convince Laurent through bargain: if he came with him to this one party his friend was throwing, just this time, then Damen would spend the next three months giving Laurent as many back rubs as he wished without complaint.

More than anything, Damen was just happy to get Laurent out of the house. It did him well to be around people that weren’t Damen or his coworkers for a change. To talk about things that didn’t include slide presentations and spreadsheets and whatever he saw on the TV or read on some site. Shake things up a little.

And it worked wonders. Laurent had found a clever girl with whom he connected and had been chatting for a while. He even allowed himself a soft drink (which didn’t have enough alcohol to qualify as an alcoholic beverage). Damen’s heart lurched as Laurent smiled politely, very obviously entertained.

Convinced that Laurent was fine on his own, Damen left the room to witness a drinking competition unfolding in the backyard. He fully intended to take part in it when the lightweight college boy on the left inevitably passed out.

It couldn’t have been more than five minutes. It was just enough time for Damen to step out to the backyard and see the college boy hurl his insides on the grass, and Laurent was poking Damen’s back with a brutal force.

The light quality that had been on Laurent’s face a moment ago had vanished. His jaw was locked, and Laurent seemed angry like Damen hadn’t seen in a while.

“What happened?” Damen asked, but as soon as the words were out, the reason materialized into the backyard.

Aimeric. Fucking Aimeric.

He came hand in hand with an older guy who was not Jord but might as well have been, greying beard, receding hairline and all. Aimeric’s hair had grown long enough to tie up into a bun since the last time Damen saw him. He greeted and smiled a very politician smile at some folks by the pool, making his way to them.

“What are you doing?” Laurent clutched the front of Damen’s shirt. His eyes on Damen were piercing, and Damen knew it was in an attempt to not let them travel east, to the last person any of them expected to see there.

If only Damen had known, he’d never have invited Laurent along. “Let’s go home,” he suggested.

“No,” Laurent replied steadfastly. “I want to see what you’re doing.”

Damen pulled Laurent to his side, a protective arm swung over his shoulders to keep him from view. The issue was that even trying to keep Laurent from harm, the harm had already reached him. Before Damen had a say in it, Laurent was stepping into the place emptied by the college kid, asking the host to explain the rules for the game.

Calling after him resulted in nothing. A second after, Laurent’s hands were tied back, and he was bending over shot glasses placed at the table, grabbing them with his mouth and tossing his head back to drink. He dropped the glass unceremoniously at the table to mouth the next one and the next one, down the line like it was water.

Laurent won, finishing his shots first. The next opponent took the place of the girl Laurent beat. Once again, Laurent won. He was getting ready for a third round when Damen stepped in.

“Come here.” Damen pulled Laurent closer reaching behind him to untie the hands.

“I was playing a game,” Laurent protested but ultimately allowed himself to be untied and dragged away.

Damen returned inside the house, guiding Laurent by the hand. The shots hadn’t hit him yet, but they would soon. Finally, they made it to the kitchen in search of water.

And there was Aimeric too, like a bad presage. In his heart, Damen prayed Laurent would overlook Aimeric with the back pressed to the stove talking to some guy who very evidently drooled over him.

Of course, Damen wouldn’t be so lucky, and Laurent would gulp his water while burying Aimeric with a deadly glare. It certainly didn’t help that Aimeric met the gaze and leaned into not-Jord’s ear to whisper something and giggle.

It certainly didn’t help that it happened again and again. One too many times.

If it bothered Damen, who objectively had nothing against Aimeric, he could only imagine what it did to Laurent to see his ex-friend magically pop up at every location they ran to and very conveniently start whispering to the nearest drooling idiot.

Laurent’s pupils were blown wide already and his lids heavy. It would get worse, and when it did, it was for the best if Aimeric wasn’t anywhere within Laurent’s sight.

“Come with me to the other room,” Damen whispered into Laurent’s ear.

“We are not going to talk about this now,” Laurent’s groggy response. He didn’t even bother masking that he was intently staring at Aimeric, who laughed carefree with not-Jord’s hand in his back pocket.

“Who said anything about talking?”

Laurent tagged along with Damen, wavering behind him. They crossed the restriction rope to make it upstairs, to the room area Pallas may get angry at him for invading.

But Damen knew the place, and he knew that in Pallas’ parents’ room, there was a nice balcony with a bench where he had sat more than once to get high with his friends throughout high school. It opened to the view of the sleeping neighborhood and blocked the noises from the party happening downstairs.

The night was chilly, even for late Autumn. It ruffled the tops of the trees and shifted strands of Laurent’s hair.

Damen started to remove his jacket, but Laurent rose a hand to his face. “I’m not cold.”

Laurent walked right past the bench and propped himself up to sit at the balcony with a leg hanging off each side. Damen went to stand beside him, in case Laurent lost balance.

Laurent breathed in deeply, his head lolling against a column. “I hate drinking,” he said, squeezing his eyes.

“Do you need more water?”

“No. I need to be sober.”

“Water could help you with that,” Damen pointed.

Laurent shook his head lazily. He swayed until his head hit Damen’s chest. “No.”

Damen tilted Laurent’s chin up to peck at his lips. Laurent’s mouth tasted disgusting, but he leaned in with a soft sigh, and Damen kissed him deeper. It went on for some time. When Damen pulled back, Laurent shivered.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Damen offered, tucking a strand of hair behind Laurent’s ear.

“About what?” Laurent said. His speech was even more dragged than before, but he knew precisely what Damen had referred to. “There’s nothing to talk about.”

“Laurent.”

“There is nothing to talk about.” Damen recognized a sign to drop the subject when he saw one.

He knew, however, that the fallout with Aimeric was still a sore spot for Laurent. And that regardless of his claims, he missed his friend. Aimeric had been one of the few people Laurent trusted enough to befriend, and after the blown-out fight that resulted in them never speaking again, Aimeric changed drastically into the role of one of Laurent’s fiercer – if not to say most dedicated – antagonists.

Laurent had been telling Damen for months that Aimeric fed people lies about him and twisted his secrets to tarnish Laurent’s image all around. Damen had thought it was the paranoia speaking, the way sometimes Laurent thought people were looking at him a certain way or laughing behind his back. But, as it turned out, Laurent had been right. The realization curled Damen’s stomach and boiled his blood.

“Are you going to tell Nicaise?” Damen asked, running his fingernails lightly up and down Laurent’s nape.

Laurent smiled. “I don’t want him to kill Aimeric.”

“Wise.”

Laurent’s eyelids grew heavier with each passing moment. His pupils were so wide his irises were reduced to little blue bands. He shivered, losing a battle against his trembling jaw. “Here,” Damen said, “Take my jacket.”

“I told you, I’m not cold.” A strong shiver followed the statement.

Damen wrapped his leather jacket around Laurent and pulled him close, resting his chin at the top of Laurent’s head, blond strands tickling his neck. There was a good chance Laurent may fall asleep like that, and Damen would have a tough time getting him off the balcony. “Are you going to throw up?”

“No. I think.”

Damen laughed into Laurent’s hair. “Come lay down.”

“I’m not in the mood tonight, Damen,” Laurent frowned.

“I meant actually lay down. You’re barely awake as it is.”

“I’m awake,” Laurent said, but he swung his leg over the balcony and hopped off, staggering on his feet.

It was an easy task to take off Laurent’s sneakers and tuck him in bed, always so impossibly pliable when he had a little too much to drink. He was reaching the worse of his drunkenness, barely capable of keeping his eyes open anymore.

“Please tell me if you need to throw up,” Damen said, sitting at his bedside just to look at him. Even poorly illuminated and wholly wasted, Laurent managed to be the most beautiful thing Damen’s ever laid eyes on.

“Lay with me,” Laurent whined.

“In a minute,” Damen said. He planned to go back downstairs once he was sure Laurent had blacked out, to explain the situation to Pallas and try to save face, but Laurent didn’t need to know that.

“You think Ric is going to hate me forever?” Laurent’s eyes were closed, face going lax. The chances he’d remember that conversation after he woke up were minimum.

Damen ran a finger down Laurent’s cheek. His face was flushed red and warm. “Will you?”

Laurent nuzzled Damen’s hand, pinning it in place with his own. “Probably.”

Laurent’s breathing evened out. He didn’t stir when Damen pulled his hand from under his or when Damen stood. To make sure, Damen whispered, “I’ll be back in a minute,” into Laurent’s ear just to see if he’d react. When Laurent remained the way he was, without a muscle on his face twitching to indicate any part of his subconscious remained awake, Damen snuck out with silent steps.

He’d bring a bucket up with him when he came back. And a bottle of water.

Before that, though, he may have a thing or two to solve with a certain brunette.

[mfingenius]

Hey! I absolutely love your writing and was wondering if you could something with Damen constantly talking about Laurent where he works and Laurent sounding too good to be true so none of his coworkers believe him (or the roles reversed)?

The thing is, Damen isn’t crazy. 

At least, Nikandros thinks he isn’t; they’ve been best friends for over twenty years, and he knows Damen is usually a very realistic person, if naive and optimistic. Apart from that, Damen has no trouble getting people into bed. He’s never wanted a serious relationship, and he’s always enjoyed sleeping around, and it’s never really been a secret. 

Which is why Nik doesn’t understand why he’s making Laurent up.

From other people, people who can’t get a date, he gets it, but from Damen?

And what’s even worse, Damen is refusing to even tell him that Laurent is made up! Nikandros has always been in on his lies before, however few of them, so this is an entirely unprecedented situation, and he doesn’t know how to deal with it.

“So,” he asks, carefully. “How’s Laurent?” 

Damen smiles blindingly up at him. “Good. He just got a promotion at work.”

“Right,” Nik says dubiously. He clears his throat. “And, uh. Where is he?”

He’d come over to Damen’s in an attempt to finally get this to stop; after Damen had told him they’d moved in together, he knew this had gone too far.

“He went back to Vere for a couple days,” Damen says sadly, eyes flicking back to the TV where they’re watching a football game. “To visit his brother.”

“Oh,” Nik says. “Right.”

He wonders if it’s time to talk to a psychiatrist.

*

“You don’t bite your pens,” Nik says with a frown, when he takes one from Damen’s coffee table to sign one of their work documents. 

“What?” Damen asks, looking over. “Oh. No. Laurent bites things when he’s nervous.”

Nik squints at him. “Right.”

*

“What the fuck, Damen?” Kastor asks, when Damen takes off his shirt; Nik and Damen go to the gym together regularly, and, sometimes, Kastor joins. Nik turns around to look at what he’s looking, and catches sight of telling scratch-marks down his friend’s back. “Who did this?”

Damen grins sheepishly. “Oh. Laurent. He has sharp nails.”

Nik is beginning to think Laurent is not made up, but a very hostile cat. 

"Right,” he says. 

*

“He’s making Laurent up, right?” Lazar asks, squinting; they’re all huddled outside of Damen’s office, watching as he talks to ‘Laurent’ on the phone, grinning so widely his dimple’s showing. “There’s no way this guy is real.”

He just can’t be; from what Damen’s told them, Laurent just keeps sounding less and less like a real person; apart from the fact that he seems to be taken straight out of Damen’s every fantasy and dream, he just cannot be real; he’s too much of a contradiction, too many unanswered questions, a person like that simply does not exist.

“We all think so,” Pallas agrees. “But why would he do that? He’s never done that before.”

“He’s stopped sleeping around.” Nik says, because that’s the weirdest part of this. “I think this might be a serious problem.”

“Someone has to ask him,” Pallas says.

“We can’t just tell him,” Aktis says. “Let’s invite him and Laurent over. When he doesn’t show, we can try to talk to him about it.”

Nikandros nods.

*

Laurent, evidently, doesn’t show; Damen tells them he had a migraine, and then begins babbling about how kind and great and gorgeous his boyfriend is, so no one really has the heart to tell him he’s making it up. 

So they don’t.

They just go along with it, and continue inviting him and Laurent to things, to which Laurent never shows.

Until he does.

*

“I’m sorry I’m late.” The blonde doesn’t have a single drop on him, despite it being pouring outside. “I couldn’t get out of work.”

“They need you there,” Damen smiles widely up at him, and gladly accepts a kiss on the lips; Nik’s, Pallas’s, Lazar’s, and Aktis’s mouths are hanging open. “Guys, this is Laurent, Laurent, these are - why are you all staring like that?”

Nik can’t bring himself to close his mouth.

“You’re Laurent?” he asks, strangled. 

“Yes?” Laurent raises a perfectly manicured eyebrow, and Nikandros doesn’t know how, but he already fits Damen’s contrite description so well he cannot possibly be a hired actor.

“You exist?” Lazar asks.

Damen frowns at them. “Why wouldn’t he?”

“We - we thought you were making him up!” Pallas exclaims. “You - it was all too suspicious!”

“Suspicious?” Laurent asks.

“Yes!” Nik says defensively. “You never showed up to anything, you’re literally taken out of Damen’s dreams, and you’re - you don’t seem real.”

Laurent’s other eyebrow raises. “I’ll take that as a compliment.” Before Nik can say otherwise, Laurent continues calmly. “I never showed up to anything because I’m Vere’s ambassador in Ios and my work is crazy, I assure you I’m not literally taken out of Damen’s dreams, and I am real.”

“Also, there are pictures of him all over my desk.” Damen points out coolly.

“What?” they all ask.

“You have some very poor observational skills for a private security company,” Laurent remarks mildly, and Nik can only stare blankly.

----------------------------------------------

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[mrs-amber]

Your fake dating au is giving me life <33 and Damen definitely needs to actually look at the reality of his life for once! I feel like there might be other promopts in the list that might fit the continuation better, but I feel like 9 would be sth Damen would say when he understands his feelings? I'd like to see that if it's sth you feel up to writing!

Hey, my love! Thank you so much for sending me this prompt, I hope you like what I did with it! Hope you enjoy the last chapter, it’s the longest one so far :)

I can’t believe this story is over, but I’m so glad that I got to write it!!

9. “I can’t lose you again! Please, don’t make me lose you again.”

Laurent kept on hiding and avoiding Damen at all costs and Damen was so confused about it, especially because whenever he was confused he would go to Laurent for help, he always understood him in a way not even Nik or Auguste had managed, but how could he talk to Laurent about Laurent himself if the blonde wasn't talking to him? This made him even more confused.

And with confusion he also became quieter and more stressed with little things, he snapped at people in a way he didn't before. He got sad when they lost games, he got mad when their training wasn't as tough as he expected, he lost it when Nikandros called him out on it.

"Hey, man! I don't know what you've been going through, but maybe you could talk about it for your friends to understand a little, huh?" Nikandros held his hand up on his sides, exasperated.

Damen sighed, he knew Nik was right again, and that he had been too stubborn to ask for help when he knew he still had friends who cared about him and would help him if he needed. With how much he was missing Laurent these days, it was hard to remember and think about anything else.

He was sitting on a bench in the locker rooms after one game, he had taken out his shirt all drenched in sweat and had it partly folded, partly smashed tightly between his fingers. He couldn't bear to look up from the floor after realizing how bad he had been behaving and the way he had just treated one of his best friends when the only mistake he had made had been to care about him talk about it. Nik had waited for everyone to leave before coming to talk to him, expecting some bad reaction and a foul mood. And he was right.

Damen left out a choked sound looked up to where he found Nik's expression settled somewhere between worried and daring. Daring him to talk and to let it out, so he did.

He told Nik everything that had happened and that he didn't already know, and even the things he had talked about before, he talked again. He expressed how he felt about all of it, he told him how confused he was and about the way Laurent had been behaving the last week's, the way he confessed he loved him.

By the end of it, Nik was also sitting in the bench beside him, eyes wide open as he heard about Laurent's feelings and mouth left agape. And when he saw in Damen's face, so helpless and confused and hurt, realization dawned in him and he started to laugh.

Damen looked at him, from head to toe, puzzled.

"You really are dense, Damianos." He clasped his hand on Damen's shoulder as he stood up, the sound of skin hitting skin echoing through the empty room.

"What do you mean?"

"What do you mean what do I mean?" Nikandros was changing clothes, putting his dirty and sweaty ones back in the bag, and taking out clean ones. Damen was still looking at him, waiting for an answer, he hadn't moved much since they began talking.

"Come on, Damen. Do I have to spell it out for you too? Haven't you learned your lesson from Laurent yet?" Realizing that yes, he would, Nikandros sighed and sat back on the bench by his side. "Damianos, for fucks sake. You love him."

Seeing the still puzzled expression on his friend's face, Nikandros continued. "You're feeling this lost without him, you hate that anyone would talk anything bad about him, and for all that I can tell, you really wanted your fake thing to be a real thing. That's why you're so lost these days." He stood up again, "in fact, thanks. This makes a lot of sense, and now I can understand why you're being such a douch for the past weeks."

----

Damen parked his car after his own house, closer to Laurent's house, but not so close that it would be easily visible from his room or any other place of the house. He took a deep breath and tried to keep in mind everything he had agreed with himself he would do once he met Laurent. He had checked with Auguste to know if the younger man would be at home later in the evening, but now he couldn't seem to find the strength he needed to get out of the car, walk the few meters left and knock on the door.

He considered calling Nikandros, just to be sure that what he was about to do wouldn't be something really stupid. But he already knew what the answer would be, and the stupid thing would have been picking up that phone and making the call in the first place.

Instead of following that trail of thoughts, he opened the door and got out, setting up the alarm as he walked in the direction of the house.

He changed his weight from one foot to the other as he waited for someone to answer the door. He was hoping it wouldn't be Laurent's parents. It was Auguste.

It only took one second for his friend to assess the situation and the expression on his face when he said "I'll go call him" and walked inside the house again to fetch his brother.

Laurent took his time, and when he arrived it wasn't with a happy neither satisfied expression on his face. Instead, he looked tired, the bags under his eyes more prominent than usual and his hair seemed to have been brushed recently, but Damen could still see the messiness in it. It made his heart sink and swell in his chest at the same time, fondness filling every inch of his body.

If what Nikandros had told him before still hadn't felt exactly right, and even if he was still reluctant about it, he could understand how it made sense now.

Laurent just looked at him, holding his weight in the doorknob at the same time he blocked his way inside the house.

"I've been thinking about you," he started. "I miss you. And now I understand why you acted like you did. It seems like everyone understood before I did. Even my mother. Even your brother and Nik. Even you." He wanted to take the single lock of Laurent's hair that was threatening to fall in his eyes and tuck it behind his ear, but he didn't. "And I'm so sorry I treated you the way I did."

"I'm not sure I understand what you're trying to say, Damen." Laurent's voice was barely louder than a whisper.

"What I mean to say is that I love you. And I'm so so sorry it took me losing and hurting you to realize what had always been right in front of me." He stepped forward and reached to take that lock of hair away from Laurent's face.

"Yeah, you were very stupid." Laurent giggled and looked up, chasing Damen's eyes.

Damen cupped his face and Laurent leaned into the touch, closing his eyes and slowly exhaling. His shoulders slumping, relaxed.

"I'm glad you're here, though," Laurent said while his eyes fluttered open. "Do you want to come in?"

Damen nodded, but instead of stepping forward when Laurent opened the door a bit further, he reached for his hand and pulled him into a hug. One hand caressing Laurent's back and the other cupping his head and stroking his hair, until Laurent brought his own arms around him.

“I can’t lose you again. Please, don’t make me lose you again.” Damen whispered as he held him tight.

"You won't."

[goldencuffs]

the tape

tw: a sex tape is filmed and released without consent.

Damen didn’t expect to wake up on Wednesday morning to the headline: Famous Football Player Caught in Tantalising SEX SCANDAL, Scroll for Video — but, well. He sort of knew it was a possibility.

 Julius had been a sweet little thing at Ernesta, the club Damen and his teammates frequented after a game or a training session or anything, really. Damen had caught sight of Julius’ blonde hair under the strobe lights, and had made his way over, tipsy and light, and just horny enough that he could last a full conversation with minimal wandering hands.

 Julius had been a ‘huge fan’ and pretty enough that Damen neglected his one rule: which was to never hook up with fans. They’d made it to Damen’s penthouse within half an hour, and Julius must have set up his phone to record them when Damen went to the bathroom after the first round.

It had honestly been the most average sex of Damen’s life — which was the only reason why he had been upset that Julius had leaked the tape at all. Damen hadn’t even tried very hard to make Julius cum, and he’d still been mostly hard throughout it all, his own release unsatisfactory.

 When he tried to explain this to Laurent later that day, during lunch at their favourite brunch place, Laurent’s face twitched. He looked furious, and then upset, and then both those expressions slowly absolved, until his expression was a flat, distant thing that unsettled Damen.

 In fact, it unsettled Damen so much, he began talking, without quite meaning to, “I just wish he’d told me he was going to film a whole tape, you know? That way I could have busted better moves. Or, made suggestions with the lighting or something. Look here — my entire body is blurry, so it’s like, what’s the point? What the fuck are we supposed to be looking at?”

 From his phone, Julius’ breathless voice panted, “Yes, harder, oh you’re so good for me.”

 It wasn’t loud enough to be heard by the other patrons in the cafe, but Laurent put his knife and fork down and hissed, “Will. You. Put. That. Away.”

 Damen did, swallowing. For the first time since he had read the article, seen the tape, and responded to the dozen or so text messages from friends about the tape, he felt embarrassment.

 Laurent wasn’t looking at him anymore. His eyes slid away, to the busy road outside, his mouth turned.

 Damen turned back to his food. Neither of them said anything else for the rest of their meal.

 *

 Damen genuinely didn’t mind the release of the tape. Julius had wanted his fifteen minutes of fame; Damen had wanted a lay — it was a win-win situation.

 No one else cared too much about it either; his teammates made sly jokes about it in the locker room, Makedon slapped him on the back with a shake of his head, and even Kastor let it slide.

 But there was one thing that did bother Damen — and it was that the love of his life, the man of his dreams, his soulmate, Laurent, was ignoring him.

Laurent had been downright hostile any time someone mentioned it; he’d eviscerated Nikandros verbally during dinner when Nikandros had made a joke about it, and he refused to look Damen in the eye.

 That was the worst part, thought Damen. Laurent was now skittish around him, like the thought of being around Damen too much nauseated him.

 He’d always known Laurent was reserved when it came to sex. He made jokes about it, talked about it as much as a healthy, twenty-seven-year-old man did, but it was never on a personal scale. When it came to Laurent’s own sex life, he was always tight lipped, even though sometimes Damen wanted to know, purely on a masochistic level. It honestly killed Damen when Laurent came in last summer to review his legal contract, briefcase in hand, and a bright red hickey on the white spot beneath his ear. It was the first time Damen had thought he might kill someone — rather violently, too.

 So, that was one of the reasons Damen used to justify Laurent’s behaviour. He was probably embarrassed about seeing… so much of his best friend. Damen wouldn’t have minded seeing Laurent naked, but that was only because he had been in love with Laurent for the last four years now.

 The second reason was that Laurent was so disgusted by Damen he didn’t want to be friends anymore.

 Damen didn’t like thinking about the second reason — so he didn’t.

 *

 A week after the tape, Damen invited Laurent over to dinner, at his family home. Theomedes was obsessed with Laurent, which Damen understood wholeheartedly; he was constantly wondering why more people didn’t fall in love with Laurent three seconds into meeting him.

 At first, it had seemed like Laurent might refuse. He was doing that a lot lately: skipping plans, cancelling so last-minute Damen couldn’t cajole him to reconsider, or in most cases, just flat out saying no.

 It seemed like today, the latter would be the possibility, so Damen said, panicked, “Please. I’ll make your favourite dessert.”

 Laurent perked a little at that. “Really?”

 “Yes!” Damen said, perhaps a little too aggressively, but it had Laurent nodding, a quick, stilted movement.

 Damen ruined the first three batches of chocolate mousse, but the fourth was decent, and the fifth was a bit better than that, so he went with it.

 Laurent arrived at seven sharp, straight from work. He had his favourite suit on, the charcoal wool suit that made everyone realise that Laurent was about ninety percent leg, and he was wearing the bright, spotty tie Theomedes had gifted Laurent about three Christmases ago.

He was so beautiful, Damen’s chest hurt. “Hi,” he said breathlessly, unexpectedly shy.

 Laurent’s gaze was unimpressed. His mouth did something strange; it compressed in on itself, until it sat in a straight line, and his eyes hovered over Damen’s shoulder.

 “You have something on your face,” he said.

 Damen tried a smile. “Well, get it off for me then, sweetheart.”

 He leant forward, very desperate suddenly for Laurent's touch, which in the past, Laurent had been very generous about.

 Laurent shoved the wine bottle he was holding into Damen’s stomach. Damen stepped back with a surprised oof, fumbling to catch it, and Laurent made his way past him, into the kitchen to talk to Theomedes.

 Damen stared after him, at a complete loss.

 He sulked in the bathroom for a while, and only came out when he was sure he could no longer avoid his father’s calls anymore.

 Laurent wasn’t looking at him when Damen returned, but he didn’t shuffle away as Damen took his usual seat beside him.

 Dinner was so pleasant, Damen almost forgot about how strange Laurent had been acting. Even Laurent had loosened, and he gave his first proper smile to Damen in a whole week when he tasted the mousse. It was a small smile, but Damen was going to remember it for the rest of his life, since they were so rare now, apparently.

 Of course, just as Laurent had completely relaxed, Theomedes said, “Do you think we’d have a case if Damen were to sue the tabloids and the man in the tape?”

 Laurent stiffened so much it was like he’d been propped up by invisible string. His shoulders tensed and pulled back, and his back was so straight Damen was sure he could run a smooth line down it.

 Haltingly, Laurent said, “I — don’t. I’m not quite sure.”

 “Why not?” Theomedes said.

 Damen said, “Dad. I’m not going to sue. He was just a dumb kid.”

 Laurent seemed to stiffen further at that.

 Theomedes frowned. “But surely —”

 “I’ll ask someone at the firm for you, sir,” Laurent said, in a polite, contrite tone that wasn’t like him at all. “I only deal with sports law so I — I’d have to ask.”

 That settled Theomedes. Damen relaxed a little too, until Laurent pushed away his dessert, despite having more than half of it left.

 It was such a depressing thing to see, Damen couldn’t finish the rest of his either.

 *

 With how jumpy Laurent was, Damen expected him to leave straight after their plates were cleared, but Laurent lingered, drinking his wine, and talking to Theomedes about the Lions chances of winning this season.

 Damen barely listened. He was upset, and his stomach had been rolling tumultuously for the last hour.

 He excused himself to his bedroom and sat on his small, single bed for a few moments, feeling sorry for himself.

 When that didn’t make him feel better, Damen went to his desk and pulled out a well-read book. Book was perhaps an overstatement; it was a small collection of poetry Laurent had written for him a year after they met. He had handed it to Damen after his birthday party, when everyone had left, and they could have some privacy.

 “You don’t have to read it,” Laurent had said, bashful, when Damen had paused in stunned silence. That was when Damen knew — and over the years that feeling had only solidified.

 The binding hadn’t been the best, so Damen had rebound it himself. Along the way he’d marked a lot of the poems too. The love poems were a source of both serenity and torture, since Damen daydreamed that Laurent had written about making love in moonlit sheets about him, but.

 He was surprised when there was a hesitant knock on his door. Laurent peeked his head through, and then he was stepping inside, wine glass topped up and his tie loosened.

 Damen’s heart lurched.

 “What are you doing?” Laurent asked, and the wine must have made him forget that he was mad at Damen, because he sounded curious, joyful.

 Damen gestured to the curling cover of Laurent’s book. Laurent flushed heavily, the colour vining his cheeks and neck and ears.

 “You kept that?”

 “Of course I did,” Damen said, affronted.

 “They’re terrible,” Laurent said, shaking his head, still red. “I don’t think I’ve even read enough poetry to justify writing so many.”

 “They’re wonderful. See.” Damen flicked through the pages and showed Laurent all his markings, scribbling along the columns of Laurent’s poetry.

 Laurent watched with hungry eyes. But he said, “Oh, Damen,” with so much sadness, Damen went, instinctively, to touch his shoulder.

 “Hey,” he said, unsure.

 Laurent stepped away from his grip, but he sat on the edge of the bed, facing Damen.

 “What is it?” Damen asked, because Laurent’s face was pale, haunted.

 “Nothing,” Laurent said, attempting a small smile.

 Damen tried to return it but couldn’t.

 They sat in awkward silence for a while — which was foreign, between them. Damen talked enough for four people at a time, and Laurent, though he said otherwise, liked that.

 Eventually, Damen said, “You’re coming to Nikandros’ party on Saturday, yeah?”

 “Oh,” Laurent said, surprised. He blinked. “This Saturday?”

 “Yeah,” Damen said, his stomach knotting when he realised Laurent was most probably going to say no.

 It was worse than that. “Ah, shit, I’d completely forgotten…” Laurent trailed off. “I didn’t realise when I — I have plans.”

 “What plans?” Damen frowned, because Laurent had approximately three friends, including him, and they were all going to Nikandros’.

 Laurent flushed again, a finger tracing the rim of his glass. “Armand from work — do you remember? I mentioned him a few times at — anyway. He. He asked me on a date and I said yes.”

 “Oh,” Damen said, so flatly he didn’t think he had even made it sound like a word.

 “Yes,” Laurent said, flushing even more, not looking at Damen’s eyes. “We’re going to Charls. You’ve been there, haven’t you? Is it any good?”

 “Hmm,” said Damen.

 “Oh,” said Laurent, awkwardly. “That’s good.”

 He left ten minutes after that. Damen smashed a penholder.

 *

 The days leading up to Nikandros’ party were the worst of Damen’s life. It wasn’t as though Laurent hadn’t dated anyone for the last few years, but the fact that he was going on a date with Armand, rich, successful, handsome Armand, who cracked dry jokes and said things like, My supervisor would kill me if I said this but did you know… He was just so boring. Laurent could do way better.

 Nikandros’ party was, thankfully, a wonderful distraction. It was as raucous as ever, and the cacophony of noises prevented Damen from thinking too much. Damen drank, he danced, and he thought of flirting with Naos’ sister, but decided against it.

 He was on the alfresco, smoking, trying to ignore the couple in the corner who were three seconds away from having sex, when Laurent opened the sliding doors.

 Damen was so surprised, he almost dropped his cigarette. Then he tried not to get his hopes up. He was either so drunk he was hallucinating, even though it had never happened before, or Laurent had ditched Charls to bring himself and Armand here.

 Laurent was drunk, or at least getting there. When he saw Damen, he smiled wide, his teeth showing.

 Damen swallowed, eyes following Laurent as he made his way over. Laurent surprised him even more; he sat close to Damen, until their thighs touched and rested his head on Damen’s shoulder.

 “Hey,” said Damen, his heart racing, confused and hopeful all at once.

 Laurent propped his chin on Damen’s shoulder. “Hello,” he said softly.

 Damen’s mouth was dry. Laurent plucked Damen’s cigarette from his fingers and placed it in his own mouth.

 Damen asked, “Armand?”

 Laurent exhaled. “He was a dick. And not in the nice, sexy way.”

 “There’s a nice, sexy way?” Damen said, amused and relieved.

 “There can be,” Laurent said, handing the cigarette back to Damen.

 They shared Damen’s cigarette for a while, fingers brushing up against each other. Laurent was still on his shoulder, and this was so achingly familiar, Damen had been afraid he’d lost it forever.

 A few moments later, Damen asked, “Was he a jerk to you, Laurent?”

 “Not really,” Laurent said.

 “Good,” said Damen.

 Laurent propped his chin on Damen’s shoulder again. “What would you do if I said yes?”

 Damen said, too seriously, “I’d kill him.”

 Laurent’s breath caught. His eyes searched Damen’s face, and Damen tried valiantly to keep his expression as neutral as he could.

 Laurent pulled back. His eyes flickered to the ground, then to Damen, and then away. “I should probably go. I have a huge headache.”

 “Okay,” said Damen.

 Laurent squeezed his hand quickly, then dropped it. He made to leave the alfresco, his movements unhurried, a little disjointed.

 At the doors, he paused. Damen saw him hesitate, and then Laurent turned around and asked, “Are you free tomorrow?”

 “Yeah,” said Damen, even though he had promised Kastor they’d have lunch together.

 Laurent nodded. “Good. Come over for dinner. I’ll make lasagna.”

 “Sure,” said Damen, now smiling so wide his cheeks hurt.

 Laurent smiled too. “See you,” he said, before he stepped through the doors, into the crowd.

 Damen watched him go, his heart settled and his smile only widening.

[zmediaoutlet]

in support of wildfire relief, @theactualpiemaker donated $50, and requested Laurent/Damen, with sub!Damen. Thank you for donating!

to get your own personalized fic, please see this post. 

A month before Laurent’s official coronation, there is a brief but bloody revolt in Barbin, and Damen thinks for a brutal and world-greying hour that he’s lost him.

The Veretian contingent, with a full complement of an Akielon ambassadorial party, had sailed from Ios many weeks before. Ios was more-or-less stable; the kyroi had reassembled, under Damen’s kingship and Nikandros’ steady honesty, and the seeds had begun to be sown. A peace, made between two kings. An alliance, forged from trust and the love-story that couldn’t be kept quiet, considering how many had been witness to Laurent’s trial, and to how Damen had rather aggressively ignored sense to try to save him. To try to save them both. In meetings of their very small private council—Vannes and Laurent for Vere, Damen and Nikandros for Akielos—Nikandros had despaired. No one, he said, will trust now that it is a true alliance. Gossip, he said, and stories that grew bigger with the telling. Like Laurent somehow besting forty men alone on a mountainside, except that now it was somewhat to do with how Damianos’s cock must be mighty enough to win over a frigid northern princeling.

Vannes had laughed, at that. Laurent had looked as cool and remote as a mountain peak. Let them tell it, he’d said, while Damen had his face in his hands. But let’s give them a few more details, to tell.

In every situation, Laurent found an advantage. There were whispers—from Pallas, from Lazar. To Akielons: the blond prince smiled for Damianos when he would not smile for another. To Veretians: the barbarian king protected Prince Laurent with his life, even with his own kingdom on the line. The long enmity between one country and another dissolved, in their two heads bent close together, in the gentle words they exchanged. To the smallfolk, and the servants, and the soldiers low in rank—was it not something to hope for? Love, they said it was. Love that could stop a war.

Not as easy to sell a love-match to the lords of Vere, to the kyroi of Akielos. That had to be done with diplomacy, with displays of advantage. Look what we gain by having the barbarians on our side. Most of Damen’s conversations became about trade routes. Wiser heads understood there was more to be gained from diplomacy than from war. A whisper, passed from servants to Vannes to Laurent, who lay half-dressed in Damen’s great bed at Ios and whose mouth curled, recounting it: if wheat tariffs will go down as Damianos goes down, then all hail the ice-cock of the Prince of Vere.

The Council of Vere had returned home after a chilling and deliberate series of meetings, in which they were closeted with Laurent and Laurent alone. Laurent said little of them, except that he had made his points clear. Damen kissed his jaw, when he said it, and didn’t ask. When Laurent left later with the Veretian ship Damen held him, on the harbor, in front of anyone who cared to look, and Laurent gave him that small unexpected smile and touched his cheek, and when the ship left his bright head was visible for a long time, glinting gold in the sunlight.

Damen’s ship followed, after a month. Time for each of them to rule, for a little while. To be seen as competent, apart. An official invitation was extended for the King of Akielos to attend the coronation of the King of Vere, and it was all the excuse he needed to get Laurent back in his arms. It was also a very public journey, with public stops publically planned, and they were—Damen can’t believe it—too confident.

In the spirit of that first allied campaign, they were to meet on neutral ground. Barbin, with its rolling hills, its farmland, the orchards heavy with apples. A festival in the Veretian style, to greet a visiting monarch, but away from the shadow of the looming castle at Arles. Damen moved more slowly, as king. His entourage was small, but he’d brought advisors, diplomats. Guards, and he never knew relief as he did when he remembered the decision to ride ahead with half of them, to get to the meeting grounds early. That they were there when the fighting started. If they’d been later—if they’d stopped—

The melee wasn’t brief. A planned attack, in three stages. Damen understands the details later, through a fog. What’s stuck in his mind, the detail that matters, is the way he’d seen Laurent’s pennant, the starburst on blue, stagger in the distance and then fall. He’d stood in his stirrups and shaded his eyes, and when he realized—when it was happening—

He’s told that he killed—many. Many. He stands in a tent, one of the brightly pennanted gaudy Veretian things that hadn’t been destroyed in the fighting. He’s attended by a low-ranked soldier who’d been a servant, he said, before he joined the army. He lets the boy remove his armor, carefully, and lets the boy wash the blood from his hands and arms and face, and he stands with his eyes pinned to the blue-silk wall and thinks of Laurent. Riders have spread throughout Barbin and the second there’s word he will be told. He knows this and can’t think past it. He’s waiting, to receive word, that after all their trials and the cruelties of the last year, that here in this godforsaken stretch of muddy farmland, the prince—his prince—

A noise, at the tent-flap. A muffled discussion. The boy-soldier disappears, reappears. “Exalted,” he says, softly, and Damen closes his eyes.

He can’t make the words come out of his mouth. The boy seems to understand—he’s clever, Damen thinks, the thought very distant as though it is all the way back in Ios, and when they finish here he will recommend that the boy be promoted—and there’s a pause, while Damen stands with his clean empty hands, half-stripped to his leather skirt, waiting to be told that Laurent is dead.

“Not how I wanted our reunion to go,” he hears.

His heart’s cracking, in his chest. He sways and there are cool fingers on his wrists, a strong grip, keeping him upright. Blue eyes, above a half-scarf of rough grey wool, and a wink of gold, on the hand matched with his.

“Steady,” Laurent says, his voice gentler, and Damen grabs him, crushes him close. His name is on Damen’s lips but he can’t say it. It’s—it was too close. The pennant falls, behind his eyes.

“I thought,” Damen says, finally, and Laurent says, “I know,” very softly. His fingers curl against Damen’s throat and Damen presses his lips to Laurent’s hair, the foolish disguise of the scarf pulled away. Damen says, “I can’t leave you again,” and Laurent’s slower, that time, to respond, and Damen pulls away to find Laurent’s eyes somber, and he says, “No,” but of course Laurent says, “Yes, you must.”

A plot, he explains. He’d seen shifts. A lord, loyal to the Regent. Whether because he believed the lies the Regent had told or had helped to sow them, Laurent doesn’t yet know. The love-stories and the wisdom of the alliance hadn’t swayed him and he’d thought to lop the head from Vere, to blame the visiting barbarian king. The timing of the attack was a surprise but the fact of it wasn’t, and he’d hoped they would have more time. Still, it could be fixed. But: “This time,” Laurent says, and Damen’s chest aches to hear how carefully he says it, “I really must go alone. I must. You’re too important now to scramble under the trees with me. If the King goes missing, at the same time that the Prince is dead—”

It’s logical. Damen hates it. “Take a guard,” he says, and Laurent shakes his head. “Please—please, for me. I can’t—”

“You can,” Laurent says, with a ruthless sort of compassion. “And you will trust me, and I will be back. Two hours. I swear it.”

It is a genuine, physical pain to end their embrace. Laurent’s hair is mussed from where Damen had gripped it, too tight. Longer, now—to his shoulders, nearly. He tucks it behind his ears, pulls the scarf again over his head. He’s in stolen clothes, somehow—grey woollens, like a farmhand. The jacket makes him shapeless. He lifts the scarf over his face, and then pauses, and lifts on his toes to grip Damen’s hair and pull him into a kiss—a kiss, their first kiss in more than a month, and it’s hard with Laurent’s teeth behind it but Damen clutches him, breathes him, before Laurent wrenches away and turns his face to the side, breathing out, the air shaking. “Two hours,” he says, after a moment, and tucks the scarf over his face again, tucking it back so the only way to recognize him are those remote, cold-sky eyes. Damen clenches his jaw, and lifts the tent flap for him. He watches Laurent disappear between the soldiers trying to organize themselves in the churned-mud battlefield that had been a parade ground, and then closes the flap, and settles to wait.

*

It rains. Damen listens to the patter on the tent, watches the brazier with its dark orange coals. He has left Meniados and Lycaeus to manage the camp. Everything is paused. The only order he gave was that no one was allowed to leave—no riders for distant forts, no word sent back to Arles. He lies on the pallet made for him in the tent and is alone, to think. To hope.

When he comes it isn't through the flap. There's a rustle, against the other side of the tent, and when Damen turns his head he sees a knife slice through the thick silk, a slice carving through just enough to admit a slim body. Damen sits up, heart in his throat. Laurent slips through and in an instant pins the flap of fabric back into the earth with his knife, and crouches there on the far side of the tent, just for a second, breathing hard.

"Is it done?" Damen says.

His voice sounds strange, thick. Laurent looks at him, sharply, and there's a pause while he pulls the scarf from his head, his hair tumbling out pale and shining in the glow from the brazier. "Yes," he says, simply, but he's frowning.

Damen has one foot on the bare earth but can't seem to stand. Laurent drops the scarf to the ground, slips off his wet shapeless jacket, and comes across the tent to him, and puts his fingertips to Damen's jaw. His eyes searching, his brow furrowed. "Damen," he says, and it's soft, and Damen turns his face into Laurent's palm, hiding himself. Behind his eyes the pennant falls and it isn't enough, that Laurent's here in front of him. These two hours—three, nearly, because Laurent is a liar—they haven't—he's trying to drag up words, but he—

Laurent's other hand touches his hair. "Quiet, now," he says. Calm, but firm. That tone, when he's giving orders and is confident they'll be obeyed. Damen sits, quiet, and Laurent drags his fingers through Damen's hair, gently untangling the curls. "Let me," he says, and Damen nods, his eyes closing. He'd agree to anything, if Laurent's hands stay on his skin. If he just stays and doesn't leave, again.

Laurent unpins the chiton Damen had half put on as a ward against the Veretian chill. The cloth slips away, to lie with Laurent's jacket. He unbuckles the leather skirt and Damen lifts his hips just enough that it can be dragged away, too. He's left naked, other than his golden cuff, and Laurent urges him down to his back with soft touches, and when he's flat on the pallet Laurent sits beside him, and leans over, and kisses him on the mouth, very gently.

Nothing like their kiss, before. He opens his mouth and Laurent licks inside, his hand on Damen's jaw, but when Damen lifts a hand to touch Laurent's hair it's stopped, and pressed slowly but firmly back against the pallet. He's left to lie there, to be kissed. Laurent kisses as he always has, with simple affection, and it's making the heat rise behind Damen's eyes, his chest slowly turning into a complicated, sore tangle.

A shift of weight, a slide. Laurent straddles Damen's hips, still wearing his damp trousers. His thumbs drag over Damen's cheekbones and Damen's fingers curl against Laurent's thighs, holding. He's allowed that, at least. The warmth of Laurent, through the damp wool. The flex of the slim muscle, the confident seat of a rider, as he leans over, carefully shielding Damen from anything outside the heat he's so-slowly stoking between them, here on their shared pallet.

The rain beats hard, above. He can still hear Laurent's breath. A slow touch, over his shoulders, his chest. Massage, he realizes after a moment, his brain working at some lower speed. Laurent carefully working the muscle, gentle circles. His hands frame Damen's ribcage, his thumbs smearing slow over Damen's nipples, which were half-budded but tighten further at the touch. Not as sensitive as Laurent's, not nearly, but he breathes out heat at the tent's canopy when Laurent's mouth touches one, liquid furl, and then the other. His abdomen, then. His hip. Laurent's weight and touch shifts, easy, and when he moves away enough that Damen can no longer hold his thighs his hands curl empty on the pallet, waiting. He feels—drugged. His heart thuds slow and heavy in his ears as a drumbeat.

Laurent's mouth, on his cock. His thighs are spread, easy confident hands on his knees. He drags in air and somehow it isn't even a surprise, when always before Laurent had approached this act as a challenge. Damen had been honored by it, before. Now he melts, into the thin down pad, his mind swirling away. His cock had been half-roused, just by Laurent's presence and the fact of his touch; he rises fully, now, and Laurent's easy, meeting it. Not teasing, not the practiced skill of before. He licks into the slit at Damen's cockhead and then sinks down immediately, sucking steadily, his head bobbing. Damen's thighs flex and his hips lift, thoughtless reaction, and instead of pushing him back down Laurent allows it. Encourages it, one hand under Damen's arse and the other holding his balls, rolling them soft and warm, the touch tender. Damen's fingers curl against the mattress and his hips lift, and again, and Laurent makes the smallest sound, some chest-noise, and stays still while Damen fucks helplessly upward, fucking into the wet liquid heat of him, his mind drained away and all that's left this simple physical pleasure, this knowing that Laurent is here with him, has worked him to this place, has opened himself so that Damen's cock smears the back of his throat. Laurent doesn't choke, doesn't move, only holds Damen's hips in the lightest grip and makes himself soft, and when Damen comes he doesn't expect it. His balls clutch, his heart thudding. He grips the mattress and makes some sound, says something he hardly hears. Laurent's mouth holds him, through it, suckling softly to prolong the pleasure, and prolongs it far enough that Damen's cock hardly softens, just pulsing gently against Laurent's tongue, in his throat. A minute—longer—Damen doesn't know. Time is something outside of him. He drags in air and it feels cold, inside his overheated body. He pools empty, on the pallet.

When Laurent finally pulls his mouth away Damen's heart has slowed, quiet as a sprawling sluggish river. A kiss, to his hip, to the stretch of stomach under his navel. He feels the sensation of Laurent crawling upward, his body stretching out over Damen's, and he expects to be kissed but instead Laurent lies on him, and draws his fingers through Damen's hair, and tucks his face in close, by Damen's ear. He's talking, Damen realizes, after too long. Very quietly, but he's talking.

"You did so well," he's saying, when Damen finally hears him. "You did just as I wanted. You're perfect. I'm so glad of you."

He's speaking Akielon. His accent better, but still with that exotic lilt of Vere. Damen never wants him to smooth it away. "I," Damen says, and feels Laurent's attention sharpen, his body shifting. Damen licks his lips and yet no more words come.

Laurent lifts up, enough that they can see each other. His hair falls over one shoulder. In the low light from the fading brazier his eyes are very dark, enough that Damen can hardly see the blue. "You're here," Laurent says. Damen blinks at him. "Damianos. Here, with me. We're safe. The danger has passed."

Damen comes back to himself in stages. Laurent waits with him, patient. He lifts a hand, at last, and brushes his knuckles against Laurent's fine ivory jaw. "I saw the pennant fall," he says. His voice sounds as rough as if he hadn't spoken in days. "I thought…"

Laurent doesn't answer. His eyes are enough. He holds Damen's neck, his throat, very gently. Damen could lie here for a week, just like this. With the fact of Laurent's heart, beating in his chest. With the body-warm press of the gold they share against his skin.

The rain slackens, against the roof of the tent. The world turns. Damen licks his lips and tries to be a king, and not just a man whose world nearly ended. "What happened?" he says. There are dead to deal with. Orders to be given. He touches Laurent's chin. "Can we—"

"Later." Damen's mouth shuts. Laurent's mouth curls, just a little, at how quickly Damen obeys. He slips slightly to Damen's side. Damen immediately misses his weight. "There's—half an hour, perhaps. We have time, for this."

Damen turns his head and Laurent's looking at him with a tenderness he can hardly bear. He knew that Laurent could hold his heart. He hadn't known, until that moment when Laurent ordered him so gently to be quiet, that Laurent held his body, too. His mind. Every part of him, surrendered. It will be a joint kingdom, he thinks, but really, there will be only one ruler. It is calming, to think it. He bows his head, when Laurent touches his jaw, and lets his forehead settle against the soft rain-smell of Laurent's hair, and sighs. Laurent says they have time. They have time.