#in terms of community and of taking the source text and making it something entirely new but still familiar

[feyarcher]

It's the loss of community from all the social media site distasters of the last year that really gets me. Musk blew up twitter because ????? and I lost a huge source of my regular connection to certain communities and the world generally. Reddit is now fucked because its owner has decided it is cool to be a mini musk or something and so many communities are getting destroyed.

Some people leave immediately when the ship starts sinking. Some people are forced out because the lack of accessibility literally steals their community spaces from them. Others stay to laugh at the asshats in charge. And bad actors come in to make the remnants of the communities into cesspools.

And what are we left with? There is no other platform that entire communities can move to in the exact same way they were before. There is no way to track where every single person who brought value to your community chooses to go. And the scatter remnants are different, forced from text based to [whatever the fuck tumblr is] based or fucking video based. (The turn to video based content with your real identity attached is a whole thing for another time). Or private discord forums that you have to already know about to be able to find because message boards where you can find community and answers with an easy search are gone.

Our communities have been wonderful much of the time (if you can manage to filter out the awful and the rage bait and curate your experience), but we built them on private companies that somehow don't give a fuck about the users who drive the entire value of their site. They focus on advertisers and data collection and never improving the actual experience of the users who mean everything to their stock prices.

The undervaluing of mods, the highlighting of asshats paying $8 to spout off nonsense, the complete lack of caring about what actually makes their platforms useful. And the collateral damage is me, losing communities and news sources and amusement that I have relied on for years. In order to what? Impress investors who are equally stupid and refuse to focus on building a good product and instead focus on what? Ads half of people block anyways? Appeasing the ego of a guy who should take his halfassed spaceship to Mars and not come back?

And the only real short term option we have to fight back is to leave. To not give them our engagement. To tank the stupid metrics they care so much about. At the cost of communities. Of easy information access. Of discovering new people and ideas completely by accident that change your whole world.

Sure, in the long run we can work on shifting to "better" sites. Ones that are open sources or ones we build ourselves. Make your own website. Get involved in modding not for profit sites. But none of it brings back the communities, the connections, the people that we have lost along the way. And today, I'm just fucking sad about it.

[sheydgarden]

Question: I am ethnically Jewish, though not culturally (complicated family history). I read your book on the roots of Antisemitic origins of Solomonic magic and wanted to ask:

If working with the Ars Goetia as entities themselves may be problematic: could reframing and restructuring the paradigms to re-imagine the listed demons and create new demons to work alongside be a better solution? I do enjoy the recent demonological work I’ve started but seeing some of the origins, it makes me wonder if my workings could be adjusted by basing my rituals in values I personally have and reframing it away from the work found in Solomonic Texts.

You had said in your Zine you yourself had worked to strip the Antisemitism from the Solomonic Imagery and parts of the practice and I was wondering if you had any advice on that process because I do find it fulfilling to ritually work alongside entities like this but am wondering how to do it in a better way?

hi! i'm gonna answer this one publicly so that i have something to refer folks to here when they ask me this same question (which i've gotten before), hope that's cool! also, apologies for the length of reply, but that's what happens when you open this particular box with me, haha.

i'm just gonna give it to you straight (and this is my opinion, of course, i know there are plenty who disagree with me! but you asked me) - i don't think there's anything you can do to "Solomonic" magic to render it not antisemitic. the antisemitism isn't a nasty veneer you can scrape off to get at some good stuff underneath - it's baked in. the entire premise of a book about a "powerful Jewish magician" who worked with Christian demons (who themselves are just a mish-mash of names & concepts from various cultures) is antisemitic. in the case of the Lesser Key specifically, we're talking about a book most likely written & distributed by Christian clergy (that's who had access to the education & tools required!) who were at the same time actively contributing to Jewish genocide. it's the foundation of the thing.

when i talk about my sigil artwork that uses grimoire-inspired imagery, i'm talking purely about holding onto an aesthetic, a visual language of lines. i can take out antisemitic visual signifiers easily because i'm only working with an image out of context. i don't think it's possible to remove antisemitism from the concept or the practice of Solomonic/ceremonial magic, at least not without completely altering it at its core - and then why bother basing anything on it at all? (i'm a Jew, not a western occultist, so i haven't tried)

i think really considering what exactly it is you've been getting out of this might make things clearer for you in terms of how you want to proceed. if it's the "Jewish" flavor, there's a whole world of actual Jewish folklore & mysticism, complete with demons of our own - you mention having Jewish ancestry, but not being culturally or religiously Jewish, so i would definitely recommend making a connection to Jewish community & learning a lot before you dive into any kind of Jewish spirituality. if it's just the concept of calling on entities via ritual work - why these? why not your own inventions? the demons listed in the Lesser Key were pretty much invented during the Renaissance, even if some of their names come from older sources. occultists combined, embellished & invented them to fit into a Christian theology, using a faux-Jewish origin story in order to lend them both more credibility (in a time when Jews were literally equated with demons!) and some spicy exoticism. i'm pretty baffled as to why so many folks still want to base a spiritual practice on that, beyond the fact that they're considered cool and/or sufficiently edgy if you grew up Christian.

if i'm being more blunt here than i was in the zine, it's because we're solely in "personal opinion" territory, and my honest opinion is that whatever folks find enjoyable about ceremonial magic could be better put to use in a framework that leaves Judaism alone entirely (and either honestly calls itself Christian - which it historically is - or creates a new cultural/religious system to operate under). i hope this was helpful - thanks for taking the time to read it!

[duckprintspress]

Fandom Lexicon: R

We’re in the home stretch on updates to our main fandom lexicon! Today, check out the entries starting with “R”!

View the entire Fandom Lexicon posted to date.

See something we missed? Notice a mistake? Let us know!

Lexicon Entries Starting with R: (read more)

RACK: Abbreviation for “risk-aware consensual kink.” A term used by members of the BDSM community who engage in more dangerous power-exchange activities to emphasize the importance of being educated about the risks associated with that activity before engaging in it. See also: PRICK. Read more about RACK.

Ravatar: On Ravelry chat boards, a person’s avatar is often called their “ravatar” as a joke on the name of the platform. See avatar.

RB: Abbreviation for “reverse bang” or “reblog.”

Re: [Thing]: Shortened way of saying “In reply to [Thing]/As regards [Thing].” On social media, Re: precedes discussion of [thing], usually as a means of circling back to [thing] after talking about something else or to make it clear that a point being made is directly related to a specific previous thing that has been mentioned.

Reader Insert: Stories written so the reader might imagine themselves as the protagonist. Often use Y/N or YN (both short for “your name”) to refer to the protagonist. Reader inserts are tagged as “Reader” on AO3, for example: Reader/(Character). May also be referred to as “x reader” fics. Read more about read inserts.

Reblog: Tumblr lingo that refers to sharing a post written by another blog using the “reblog” function, which ensures the content remains connected to the original blog. Not to be confused with a repost.

Rec List: Shortened form of “recommendation list.” Like a mixtape of the creator’s favorites in a given category. Could be fanfic, movies, books, TV shows, blogs to follow, etc. There is no upper or lower limit on how many things can be in a reclist. Can be very specific (e.g. only works featuring a precise trope of a specific ship in a specific fandom) or very broad (e.g. “my favorites”).

Redacted: A term that means the previous text has been removed for Reasons (specified or unspecified). Within fandom, this is typically used facetiously to refer to information that fans are not supposed to know (or not supposed to share), assumptions that may or may not be correct, unpopular or controversial opinions, or simply for the laughs. Read more about redaction.

Reddit: A forum-esque social media platform. Visit reddit.

Remix: Mixing up the elements of a source material. Fandom usage can refer to art, writing, video edits, music, or pretty much any other media imaginable.

Repost: Copying an original post (most often artwork – including photographs – or animated gifs) and posting it to one’s own blog, rather than using the reblog function. When done without permission, this is a form of content theft. When done with permission and credit, it’s fine. Don’t take other people’s hard work without asking! Not to be confused with a reblog, retweet, or other platform-based forms of post-sharing.

Reverse Bang: A collaborative creation event in which artists create an art piece and write a small amount about it to offer guidance, then writers sign up to write a story for that piece, usually with a minimum length of at least 5,000 words. See also: big bang, creation challenge.

RN: Abbreviation for “right now.”

RPF: Abbreviation for “real person fic.” Fanworks about people who actually currently are alive or have been alive in the past, rather than about fictional/made-up characters. A lot of RPF involves shipping real people together. Sports fandoms and bandoms are big, popular examples of RPF communities, and it’s also common for lead actors who play popular fictional ship characters to get shipped together (for example, the actors Jensen Ackles and Misha Collins from Supernatural who play Dean Winchester and Castiel, the very popular ship Destiel, are also often shipped together as the popular RPF ship Cockles). Read more about RPF.

RPG: Abbreviation for “roleplaying game.” A game in which individuals create characters or play a game-assigned character and play the role of that character throughout. RPGs can be played via any venue/channel/platform that allows individuals to interact with each other or with a gaming system. See also: JRPG, MMORPG, TTRPG (pending).

RPS: Abbreviation for “real person shipping.” See RPF.

RT: Abbreviation for “retweet” on Twitter or “retoot” on Mastodon.

Rubberduck Debugging: Explaining a problem to an unresponsive target in order to identify and fix the origin of that problem. Originates from The Pragmatic Programmer. Read more about rubberducking.

The Rules of the Internet: The Rules of the Internet is a loose, unofficial list originally spawned from 4chan. The list is memetic and subject to change, and a few specific rules have been widely adopted in fandom. Read more about the Rules of the Internet. Rules most often mentioned in fandom spaces:

Rule 34: If it (whatever “it” is) exists, there is porn of it. No exceptions.

Rule 35: If there is no porn of it, porn will be made of it.

Rule 36: No matter how fucked up “it” is, there is always worse than what you just saw.

Rule 63: For every male character, there is a female version of that character, and for every female character, there is a male version of that character, and there will always be porn about both versions of that character. This is by far the most widely spread Rule in most fandom spaces, and “rule 63” is a common tag used on content of this type. See also: genderbend, genderswap.

Rule 64: There is lore for everything that exists.

Rule 65: If there isn’t lore yet, there will be imminently.

Rule 66: The longer a piece of lore is, the weirder it will get.

[creature-wizard]

...Okay so, I didn't notice this at first, but the list that Schnoebelen gives is actually different from the one posted on the site I linked. So for reference, here's the version Schnoebelen quotes in his book:

Witches do not do evil. They believe that doing evil and harm is against the Universal Law. Witchcraft tells us, “An it harm none, do what ye will.”

Witches do not worship Satan. They do not have a Satan in their deity structure.

Witches wear clothing of every style and color. They come from every socio-economic and ethnic background…

A male Witch is not a warlock. This was a term used by Christians during the “Burning Time” to designate male Witches.

Witches do use spells. A spell is a thought, a projection, a prayer or an enchantment. Other religions use prayer, meditation, projection or ritual to produce an intended result. The word ‘spell’ does not equate with doing evil or harm.

Witches do use magic wands… they are used for directing energy, as in healing…

Witches do use Witchcraft as a Science, an Art and a Religion. They use their knowledge and magic in harmony with the Universe and Nature around them. The word ‘magic’ comes from the Greek word ‘magi’ meaning ‘wise. In the origins of many languages, the word ‘Witch’ was part of a constellation of words for ���wise’ or ‘wise ones.’…

In Witchcraft as a Science, we view the pentacle as the golden section, a geometric shape and a talisman. In the Religion of Witchcraft, the circle surrounding the star represents God/Goddess — the total intelligence refracting and reflecting all light. Light gives us wisdom. The five pointed star (pentagram) represents the human body and the earth. In combination, the star surrounded by the circle represents the human body surrounded by the protection of the God/Goddess force. The pentacle is the symbol for Universal Wisdom.

Witches do concern themselves with Ecology…”

He claims that he quoted this from the Witches’ League for Public Awareness tract, which was apparently printed in 1988.

So, next, he claims that Laurie Cabot is in denial about witches worshiping Satan, because Satan and the Horned God have so much in common. The items he lists:

Both are lords of death — and the source of death.

Both rule in an “underworld” kingdom of some sort.

Both represent bestiality and untrammeled lasciviousness.

Both are known as Lucifer in some circles. 6

Both are believed to be the source of Light.

Both demand commitment by oaths and covenants.

Both seek to draw their worshipers away from the Bible’s God.

So, regarding item one - the Horned God relates to the cycle of the year. Of course death is involved, because have you ever seen what happens in autumn and winter, Bill? God that has something to do with death =/= Satan.

Regarding item two - an underworld kingdom is kind of a natural association for earthly fertility deities, ya dingus.

Regarding item three, see: the entire concept of fertility deities.

Regarding item four - according to whom? And why should their opinions matter any more than any other oddball with a fringe opinion in the witchcraft community?

Regarding item five - Schnoebelen is citing Aradia: The Gospel of the Witches, which... while influential on Wicca and the neopagan movement, isn't exactly a central text for most people. Just because some people in "some circles" are calling the Horned God "Lucifer" because of this, doesn't mean that it's the Horned God's "true" identity.

Regarding item six, this is partly because Wicca was modeled after conspiracy theories about what witches did back during the witch trials. This is because Wicca was taking cues from Margaret Murray, who believed that the "witches" were actually cryptopagans worshiping a pre-Christian deity. Also, oaths and covenants have existed in many traditions (including Christianity), and so their existence doesn't make Wicca "satanic."

Regarding item seven - you're literally just whining about other religions having the nerve to exist, dude.

Next he tries to be like "Nuh-uh! You're wrong!" over Laurie Cabot's assertion that male witches are not warlocks. And like, sure dude, it's valid to point out that there were magical practitioners of the time actually calling themselves warlocks, but the core issue isn't "Laurie Cabot is lying!", it's "Laurie Cabot is making presumptuous statements about other magical practitioners."

Regarding spells, Schnoebelen claims:

It is the ethical difference between asking God to relieve you of a repressive husband under whom you must live and going up to the man and blowing his brains out with a pistol.

Buddy, if there's a chance that your god might maneuver someone into a severe automobile accident, the difference isn't as big as you claim. The way you talk about the alleged outcome of Bank Lady's prayers, praying to God is basically playing Russian roulette. According to you, all the lady did was pray for you in the name of Jesus and the next thing that happens is God arranges serious violence. Just because you outsource the responsibility, doesn't mean you don't bear that responsibility. Personally, I don't think I could feel comfortable praying to a god who might commit severe violence on a number of people when literally all I wanted was for them to give one person a little nudge in a positive direction.

Because if you aim a gun at a person and pull the trigger and the gun does not discharge because you failed to realize it wasn’t loaded, you are still guilty of the intention of murder! The court would still convict you of attempted murder.

Says the man who sees nothing wrong with playing Russian roulette with somebody else's head.

Oh and if you're wondering why your spells aren't working, Schnoebelen has an answer: Jesus!

You might ask, “If Wicca is so dangerous and is run by demon power as you say, why doesn’t it work all the time?” The answer to that, my friends, is that there is another “Game” in town. Jesus Christ is infinitely more powerful than the “Old Gods” of Wicca, and He can intervene whenever it suits His sovereign purposes.

So you're saying that sometimes it suits Jesus's ~sovereign purposes~ to interfere with a college student's "help me get a job so I can survive this capitalist hellscape" spell? If so, I think Jesus needs to sit down and reassess his sovereign purposes. Honestly Bill, you really make it sound like God and Jesus need to sit down and learn about the concept of "the ends don't justify the means."

Next, Schnoebelen tries to demonize Cabot talking about the light in item 8, because light is Lucifer is satanic!!! Because it's not as if "light" is a common term/metaphor when talking about knowledge and wisdom in general, that extends well outside of Christianity. Basically, he's making tinfoil hat reaches here.

Next he talks about witches (Wiccans/neopagan witches, of course) who vehemently tried to distance themselves from satanists (as a lot of them did as a direct consequence of the Satanic Panic), and to refute them, brings up...

Mike Warnke.

If you've been keeping up, you know that Mike Warnke is an exposed fraud. If not, you can read the Cornerstone Magazine article on him here. The TL;DR is that Mike Warnke was a guy who claimed he'd become a satanist in college, discovered that satanism was part of a world-controlling conspiracy, committed a lot of SRA, got kicked out over a drug overdose, and found Jesus. "Claimed" is the operative word, because when the people who knew him at the time were actually interviewed, they all called bullshit - but did mention that Warnke loved to tell tall tales about himself.

At this point I have to wonder, just how much are these people aware that the others are all frauds? Does each one think that they're the only fraud and it's just luck that nobody else catches them on it? Or do they have some sort of mutual understanding and just support each others' lies and scams because calling out the others would attract too much scrutiny to themselves, and the entire house of cards would come down? Like, what's going on here?

People can, of course, go from Wicca to some form of Satanic spirituality, but William "Bill" Schnoebelen claimed that Wicca was actually created to recruit naive spiritual seekers and gradually indoctrinate them into the beliefs of a worldwide Satanic conspiracy.

In Wicca: Satan's Little White Lie, he tries to present himself as an innocent man seduced into dark powers, but the way he actually talks about himself, it sounds more like he just wanted power and would go along with pretty much anything so long as it seemed to offer more power.

So now he's claiming that Wiccans who desired "more wisdom" would be taught that the Horned God was actually Lucifer, and from there be led into LaVeyan Satanism, and from there, be led into "hardcore" satanism; IE, conspiracy theory satanism.

He claims that:

The man who was my immediate superior was a strange, but powerful satanist from Chicago with all sorts of connections in politics and industry. I was amazed at the people of power I would meet at the sabbats.

I figured I had it made and my ship was finally coming in. I signed a pact in my own blood with Satan. He received complete control of my body and soul. In return, I got seven years of whatever I desired: money, sex, drugs or power! It could all be mine!

Familiar fairy tale trope is familiar, lol

Then, Schnoebelen claims that he'd sent a check in to the Church of Satan, and it came back with the words "I'll be praying for you in Jesus's name" written on it. And apparently he knows it's a woman's handwriting because it was "delicate and feminine."

And then he claims:

Within days, things began to happen. I lost my job, my wife got sick, I got sick, and my satanic mentor, so powerful and self-assured, got in a serious truck accident and ended up in the hospital with grievous abdominal injuries. His previously limitless supply of money from California dried up, and I was effectively cut off from all my powerful new contacts.

I'm sorry... what? That's... that's awfully vicious behavior for the deity who's supposed to have the moral high ground, my dude. Are you saying that all this lady did was pray for you, and God just chose violence?

Later, Schnoebelen claims:

Much of my personal story as contained in chapter one is radically different from the current public relations image being promoted in the media by witches and Neo-Pagans.

Like the PR material for any deceptive religious cult, they wish to present as positive an image as possible. They deal in non-issues rather than the central points which really matter in an eternal perspective.

Goddamnit, this is another one of those things where the Christians act offended because the people who aren't Christian don't subscribe to the whole "you need a savior to save you from your sins" thing, isn't it?

Anyway, Schnoebelen quotes Laurie Cabot's list of Witches' Do's and Don'ts, and proceeds to gripe and complain that witches aren't actually morally pure as all that.

Again, we're dealing with a relatively new spiritual movement where people are bound to make idealistic statements that won't hold up upon meeting the complexity of the real world, or that people just won't always live up to because people aren't perfect. And quite frankly, Christianity is no different; y'all have your high-minded ideals, but in the day-to-day you make a lot of concessions and compromises. And you have to, because your survival depends on it. You can't always give your boss your "honest opinion," and it's not prudent to give away everything you own.

What about magic? As I mentioned in my own story, the ethics get a bit nebulous when you decide if you’re going to heal someone without their permission, or do a love spell on a person without their knowledge. You see, this is all so vague it is meaningless. Suppose you have a relative with Alzheimer’s disease. Would it be alright to put a spell on him to kill him and “put him out of his misery?”

Some witches would say yes, others would say no. To whom do we turn to settle these things? In some older witch traditions, being a homosexual was a “no-no,” yet other newer witch groups celebrate “gayness.” Did they get a direct line from the “Universal Law” to change the rules? Is it alright to cheat on your “lady?” If she doesn’t know, she isn’t harmed, is she? You see how misguided and useless this kind of ethical system is? It allows for all manner of exploitation and evil, and believe me - I knew some awfully selfish and exploitative “Wiccans” in my day. One of them stole my high priestess’ wedding and engagement rings!

Man, if only there were people who ask these hard questions and search for ways to deal with these issues without appealing to a higher authority... if only people had been interested in wrangling such things since ancient times... if only there were such things as philosophers and ethicists... if only...

By the way, Bill, if Christians are supposed to be all loving and harmless, is it correct to pray for someone knowing that your god might likely inflict violence on them? Is that really any better or different than straight-up siccing a violent demon on them?

And then Bill claims this about the Threefold Law:

For example, if you perceive that someone has injured you in some fashion, either magically or physically, you have the “right” by Witch Law to hurt him three times worse. What often happens is that witches are injured in some real or imagined way and believe they have the right to hex the offending person three times worse!

This is literally not what the Threefold Law is about. The Threefold Law is one of those kinda culturally Christian "what goes around, comes around" kind of deals. Retaliation isn't supposed to be necessary because the universe will supposedly hurt the original dickbag three times worse.

He claims that a young woman stole the HP's jewelry, and the HP "invoked the law of three" and supposedly, the young woman fell down a stairs and was paralyzed from the neck down:

We did not curse her and say, “Goddess, make her fall down a flight of stairs and be paralyzed.” We just invoked this “Law” upon her. To end up a paralytic for life for ripping off jewelry is a bit severe. This was done when I believed I was a “white” witch and would never have considered cursing someone or seeking power from the devil.

Dude... may I remind you of what you claimed happened when Bank Lady prayed to Jesus? Literally how are Christians any better, in your reckoning?

Schnoebelen claims that magical fights will inevitably escalate and may I remind you, Schnoebelen, that Evangelical Christians see themselves as being in the middle of a spiritual war, waged against everyone who isn't like them. You, Schnoebelen, apparently believe it's justified for Christians to pray to Jesus to inflict violence on anyone who isn't a Christian. The crowd you're appealing to prays for horrible things to happen to everyone they've made their enemies every day. The crowd you're appealing to thought AIDS was God's punishment on the gays.

You don't have the moral ground you want everyone to think you have.

[sortarapunzel]

clawing at the walls every time i come across a new sansûkh song. this time maybe by half alive

[pysksos]

Hi! Okay. So. I preface this with the fact that I don’t use my tumblr anymore except to browse, but I came across your blog in trying to research Cornish polytheism/Bucca. You mention in your pinned post about not really liking/trusting Gemma Gary’s stuff, which is valid, but she’s one of the only people I’ve been able to find actually talking about Cornish craft and Celtic deity stuff specific to Cornwall. My family is Cornish for generations on my mother’s side (I was born in the US) and as a witch I deeply deeply want to connect to my actual culture and find resources for learning about it. Would you be able to share any of where you’re learning from? Again, the only Cornish polytheism stuff I’ve seen discusses the Bucca (as the Devil), and then it’s only Gary and her contemporaries. Are there other gods? Is all the evidence in folktales or are others publishing about it? Also if you’d rather not answer publicly that’s okay!

Hello,

A few notes on Gary's work to clarify myself – her general books are interesting and a useful starting point as, to my knowledge, she does live and practice in the region, and her cited works (while sometimes...mis-cited) are useful for further research. For me her work falls short in that it doesn't recognise Cornwall as region with Celtic heritage, history and culture which has lead to her conflating Cornish traditional & folk practices with wider English traditional and folk practices. Hence Bucca's conflation with the Folk Devil. This is something to be aware of in all facets of researching anything pagan/occult/pre-Christian to do with Cornwall. It was one of the earliest regions to have assimilation attempted.

Cornish ancestry is not a requirement for Cornish polytheism or paganism, as a heads up, and generally Cornish polytheism & paganism is focused on bioreigonality & the Cornish landscape. This extends to deities – practitioners & pagans from the USA I talk with that follow other paths have experienced some difficulty in contacting the Bucca without any hitches. This is certainly something to keep in mind along with engaging with your ancestors culture should include engaging with the regions current struggles & political issues respectfully and putting the voices of Cornish people first (I'd argue this is important for anyone engaging with their ancestors culture) - without a current day Cornwall doing well, how can it's land-tied deities and spirits be honoured and beloved.

The main resources I can recommend are folkloric ones – here is a drive of Cornish folkloric resources that I have (includes some language ones & Cornish Arthurian Legends). Not included is The Cornish Traditional Year by Simon Reed, which I would also strongly recommend because it has a good basis for a calendar for Cornish polytheism. They are unconverted to PDF but I also currently reccomend Cornwall's Pagan Heritage by Richard A. Courtney. There's also this list.

Cornish folklore is an important part of Cornish polytheism for the dual reason of 1 – there are no texts or central record of pre-Christian pagan practices that are easily accessible and 2 – Cornish folklore was largely oral and spread by droll tellers, making it hard to censor or remove any leftover pre-Christian pagan figures or narratives. Of course, don’t take folkloric sources at face value. I use them as starting off points for ‘direct’ research (astral journeying, putting out feelers to communicate or set up a line of contact, ask the Bucca to expand on folkloric stories, etc) along side note taking to seek other resources (I’m unaware if Kresen Kernow has any online resources available internationally, but it’s worth having a look).

In terms of other deities there is a very narrow pantheon (entirely due to above assimilation). Ankow is a shared figure between Breton & Cornwall (spelt differently, of course), an attendant related to death that escorts people from the land of living to the world of the dead (psychpomp would be an appropriate category). It is also easy to extrapolate from the sister region Wales that a lot of deified or deific figures would be, on some level, heroes elevated to that status.

In my personal practice I venerate a pair of deified lovers from the Zennor Mermaid myth and an unverified deity related to land fertility specifically. I’m aware these things may not translate to a polytheist in the USA though. Of course the Bucca is a currently central figure, and if you’re interested in experiences of Them outside of the folk devil lens, let me know and I can collect my notes and type them up for you. I'm also working on my own resource for/of Cornish polytheism for sharing, and I can also let you know when that is finished if you would like.

Thank you for your ask :-) I hope this has been helpful!

[booklovertwilight]

☕️ thoughts on different fanfiction sites perhaps? (AO3 vs Wattpad vs ffnet vs whatever else there is lol)

Hi friend! Sorry for the late reply, one of my posts blew up and the notification avalanche scared me off the site for a few days.

So I've been writing fanfic for *checks watch* 13 years now. I've posted it on AO3, Wattpad, FanFiction.net, Reddit, DeviantArt, YouTube comments sections, and blogs I set up myself. I'mma cover the first three individually, and do the others as a sort of collective.

I started off writing on FFnet back in 2009, and even back then I was aggravated by how much work it takes to do something as simple as post a new chapter. The UI to search for and read fic is fine, I guess, but as a prolific writer (I posted over a dozen stories on that site), the fact that it takes like ten steps to post a chapter is just Bad™. Like you have to 1) open your author profile 2) go to the side column and expand the 'works' tab 3) go to 'manage works' 4) scroll through your entire list of fics to find the one you want to add a chapter to 5) click the chapters list 6) click the add chapter button .... etc etc AAAAAAA. I have not written anything on the site in years and I still remember this stupid process. Btw the menus still look & act like this. In fucking 2022.

Wattpad is much nicer in terms of user interface. In fact it's got an option to add cover art which will be displayed front and centre along with the title and summary in search results, which, as a writer/artist who draws his own covers for his fics anyway, I thought was great. Generally, the process of posting new works / new chapters to existing works is a lot more seamless here than, actually, any other site on this list. It's also got this neat feature where you can comment on a fic line-by-line, by highlighting the text, which is a lot more user-friendly than having to copy the text and paste it in quote marks into a comment. But the nice UI/UX can't make up for the fact that -- at least in 2014, which was when I briefly tried writing there -- Wattpad was a cesspool of the most annoying human beings to ever exist. I wanted to post my writing to a community that would give me interesting comments and useful feedback, not write incoherently-spelled rants about how I was taking the source material too seriously. I lasted on Wattpad about 5 months.

After I quit FFnet and Wattpad I went around posting fic to a bunch of random forums, none of which really worked well because they hadn't been designed for that purpose. Posting long-form stories (which is pretty much all I write) to either Reddit or DeviantArt is an absolute nightmare of comment-section-linking. And posting fic to my own blog requires I have some way to bring people to see it, which is remarkably difficult to pull off and requires a lot of work. And on top of all that, there's no community, really, so you get whatever bottom-of-the-barrel internet trolls think it would be funny to harass you.

AO3 is where I post my fic now (@booklovertwilight on there too, in case there's still anyone following me who doesn't know that), and for good reason. I've tried a lot of stuff (perhaps too much stuff) and it's all-around better than anything else available. Its UI isn't the best, but it's manageable. Its site design is pretty good. But crucially, the community on there is just wonderful. Part of this is the fact that the Death Note fandom in specific is just a lovely place to be (nowadays), but even when I've posted fic for larger or more militant fanbases (*cough cough* Sword Art Online), even the criticisms have been coherent and well-thought-out. I felt less like I was being ridiculed in a school cafeteria and more like I was being given a constructive critique by a fellow english major.

There's also the factor of legal recourse. I used to write long disclaimers at the top of my FFnet stories saying things like "I make no money off all this, all rights belong to [creator of canon], please don't sue me I'm broke". Everyone did. I absolutely love the dignity in being able to post fic without having to grovel to the copyright overlords, knowing some lawyer I pay for with my yearly donations is doing it for me. The community is what brought me to AO3, but the legal safety is what's gonna keep me here.

Hope that answered your question, friend! Thank you very much for the ask, this was a lot of fun to think and talk about <3

[thesophiades]

[Review] A Single Ouroboros Scale

A Single Ouroboros Scale, by Bez

I talk a lot about my own bleeding disorder (hemophilia) and its associated injuries below. If you think that might make you uncomfortable, I’d suggest not reading this post. Only text follows, there are no videos/audio/visuals etc.

It’s a tricky thing, speaking about semi-autobiographical works, as I never want to offend or strike a raw nerve unwittingly- especially if it pertains to a topic that I don’t feel as if I can relate to. It’s easier to sit with someone’s grief if you feel like you have a connection, your own source of experiences to fall back on while discussing their creation. It’s part of why I was able to write some thoughts about Let’s Talk Alex, as I have experience with leaving an abusive relationship- and not Sting, as I’m fortunate enough that I’ve never had a brush with death outside of my own near-death experiences.

Still, I figured I’d try. I’m disabled, and have grappled with the feeling of having my illness take away from me relentlessly: not only my general quality of life (it can be excruciating to have joint bleeding: the blood stretches the capsule to its limit, displacing the bones- causing severe, accumulative arthritic damage: as if it weren’t a slap to the face enough to have your joints set ablaze from the heat and tear wrenching pain of the spontaneous bleeding itself) but also my means of creative expression- whether it be from literally losing the ability to hold a pencil and having to slowly relearn how to draw/paint and radically changing my entire process and art style to accommodate, or being in a fog from being in so much pain my brain is mush and writing is out of the question.

It’s hard. It’s devastating. Unless you’ve experienced that loss of not only yourself, but also your means of interacting with the world through self expression- it’s hard, I guess, to explain the terror of losing months at a time to the endless sea of pain. Of not wanting to be defined by only your capacity to endure, but struggling to be a person when you’re barely clawing onto existing. You aren’t as sharp when you’re sobbing and trying to desperately unbend your knees because they’ve locked up into place from internal bleeding. So while I may not be able to relate on the particulars of cognition Bez mentions here- I’ll be approaching this from the perspective of a creative who has had their sense of self and work threatened by major illness.

This game made me sad. That sounds like a rather childish way to express how I felt- but I really struggled to find any dressed up metaphor or simile that rung as true as just… sad. My experiences with my genetic disorder are not ones I’d wish on anyone- and it’s always sad to see when someone else has experienced similar difficulties. The inevitability permeating the piece- the deletion impending no matter how you choose, the lack of real, meaningful change you can make in their fictional community: it reminds me so much of the way walls seem to close in with depression, or long term illness- how no matter what you do, it feels as if it doesn’t matter, because things are awful and out of your control.

I wrote a metastudy paper this semester for one of my courses- on the impact of stress on depression, and while knowing about the typical globalization of negative thought patterns associated with the illness is comforting in an abstract way: knowing the answer behind something doesn’t change the emotional processing part of things, I guess.

I know what it’s like to be so hopelessly down a hole that you can’t see a way out. How the world keeps rushing on without you- the fear and sorrow at being left behind, of being forgotten. That is such a hard thing to handle, let alone with grace. I try to strive for strength and grace in my own troubles, but I fall short of the mark so often- I am so thankful for my loved ones and medical team, and their perpetual patience.

I was a little puzzled by the poems included in the bottom links, but I did listen to one of them, and sat for a little bit to let it sink it. I can see how it ties into the piece- the question of immortality, stars going out, a universe rushing endlessly forwards, but I missed them at first blush since I don’t believe there was any mention to poetry in the actual game. I did bookmark the site though, it’s always nice to find new ways to engage with, and pull others into engaging with, poetry.

This is a complicated little piece- not because of any technowizardry that was impenetrable to me, but because I feel as if I’m at a loss for how to really express how I felt, besides sorrow. I hope too, that one day Bez is able to look back at this game and be able to have a bit of a chuckle at a past self- that the situation won’t be as dire or harrowing in the future. I can’t promise that it will be. I can hope, but I also hope that Bez is able to make it through things OK, no matter how things shake out.

[pumpkinpaix]

a few notes on translation

hey everyone, in light of some of my recent posts (here and here) making the rounds, I’d like to say a few things.

first, I want to say that I am not interested in trying to find a satisfactory english translation of zewu-jun at this time. I know everyone means well and is sharing different ideas out of excitement. that’s great!! I’m very glad I could get you all to consider the complexity of the title and all the pitfalls that come with trying to translate it! however, I do not wish to receive any more suggestions on how to translate zewu-jun. as I said, forcing one language into the shape of another is never going to work perfectly. that’s the nature of the thing.

I understand the impulse and temptation to try to find words in your own language to describe something that you care about, of course I do. but sometimes, you won’t be able to find those words--perhaps they elude you, or perhaps they don’t exist at all. there’s a discomfort in that, I know, but I hope everyone reading this can forgive me for saying that I want you all to live in that discomfort. after all, I have lived here my whole life. when I speak to my family, I do so knowing that I am constantly interacting with them through translation. that no matter how good my english is, it will fail me when it comes time to transmute my thoughts into chinese words.

not gonna lie, it sucks.

It occurred to me sometime in college, I think, that many people don’t experience this: the inherent alienation of not sharing a native language or culture with your parents. I was fiercely jealous, suddenly. I think about all the times my mother and I failed to communicate because of this barrier. I think about all the times that failure hurt. it all felt very unfair.

in a sort of roundabout way, I suppose my current refusal to provide, or even search for, a simple translation of zewu-jun is my attempt to force some of you to experience this, just a little. the feeling of not being able to capture your thoughts in words. the feeling of not being able to communicate. maybe that’s unkind of me, I don’t know.

every time I translate seriously, I think about how lawrence venuti described the violence of translation:

My use of the word “violence” here has been questioned by a professional translator ... Yet if by this term we mean “damage” or “abuse”, then my use of it is neither exaggerated nor metaphoric, but precisely descriptive: a translator is forced not only to eliminate aspects of the signifying chain that constitutes the foreign text, starting with its graphematic and acoustic features, but also to dismantle and disarrange that chain in accordance with the structural differences between languages, so that both the foreign text and its relations to other texts in the foreign culture never remain intact after the translation process.

Translation is the forcible replacement of the linguistic and cultural differences of the foreign text with a text that is intelligible to the translating-language reader. These differences can never be entirely removed, but they necessarily undergo a reduction and exclusion of possibilities - and an exorbitant gain of other possibilities specific to the translating language. ... The aim of translation is to bring back a cultural other as the recognizable, the familiar, even the same; and this aim always risks a wholesale domestication of the foreign text, [oftentimes serving] as an appropriation of foreign cultures for agendas in the receiving situation, cultural, economic, political. Translation is not an untroubled communication of a foreign text, but an interpretation that is always limited by its address to specific audiences and by the cultural or institutional situations where the translated text is intended to circulate and function. [emphasis mine]

-- Lawrence Venuti, The Translator’s Invisibility, 2nd edition p.14 [line breaks added for readability]

it’s wordy, I know, but I think very important in a time when english is becoming/has become the world’s lingua franca, and brings with it its history of imperialism and colonialism. we have to acknowledge that the act of translation comes with violence, sometimes intentional, sometimes not. i don’t agree with venuti entirely--I think translation always damages, but does not always abuse. regardless, i have a very hard time taking this lightly, which is why I don’t do this for a job lol can you imagine.

i bring this up because it’s something that I want people to consider: that the very act of translation is violent. that the fact that we can experience this story at all is violent. that the constant search and demand for the “right” translation is, indeed, violent. that’s okay. it comes with the territory. i’m here too, and I’m glad to have met you. 💛 but I want us all to be able to acknowledge the fact that every time we talk about the source text in a different language, we are holding knives.

i obviously do not think that translation is bad, far from it. i think it’s wonderful and wondrous to be able to communicate across cultures and across time. i read mdzs in translation first, after all. I had to, much like most of you. without it, I would never have been able to experience this story that has become so important to me! translation, for all that it damages, also creates. it makes beautiful things. it is necessary. I love doing it, I love trying to find the right balance so that someone else can also fall in love with this thing I love.

whether or not you agree that translation is inherently violent is ultimately up to you: this is a philosophy, not a truth. I am not particularly well-versed in the discourse of translation. it’s possible that this is considered a truth in translation circles. as of writing this, I wouldn’t know. however, it is a philosophy that I subscribe to--it ensures that I keep my ego in check and reminds me that, like pretty much everything, translation is inevitably political and that it can have significant ramifications.

i want to end this by cycling back to the beginning of this post. all of the suggestions I’ve received are innocuous and well-meaning. I don’t want anyone to feel bad about sending them. i hope you don’t by the end of this post! like I said, I appreciate that they’re all coming from a place of enthusiasm and love. i promise you, I get it. but I won’t be responding to any others.

if you’ve gotten to this point, i urge you all to read @hunxi-guilai‘s notes on her translation process here. she and I have very similar approaches and concerns when we try our hand at mdzs/cql translations, even if we don’t come from or end up at the same place. Though we have a similar cultural background, we have very different wells of knowledge. she does things I can’t, and I do things she can’t. we prioritize differently. but in that post, you can see a practical application of what I’m trying to say here.

and finally, remember, like hunxi said in her disclaimer: we are human, subjective, and fallible. and, in this case, we are both american. do not take our word as law, do not assume that our heritage makes us experts, or gives us a pass. it’s vital to apply your own reasoning to our posts, including this one.

in summary, here is what I want to say: 1) translations will always fail, 2) translations are always violent, 3) the way many people in EN fandom continue to try and find “the perfect translation” for terms and names is part of that violence, 4) if you like the things I post and talk about, then I hope you’ll think about this too

thanks, everyone 💛

[duckprintspress]

Fandom Lexicon: U, V, and W

We’re in the home stretch now – only two more posts after this one! Today, we run through three letters at once. I’d love some more terms for V if any of you can think of some!

View the entire Lexicon posted to date.

Know a term we missed? Notice a mistake? Let us know!

Lexicon Entries Beginning with U:

Uke: In Japanese fandom, the uke character is the one who bottoms during sex. See also: seme.

UNF: Abbreviation for “universal noise of fucking.”

UTC: Abbreviation for “under the cut.” On social media platforms such as Livejournal and Tumblr that have “read more” functionality, UTC would mean there’s more information if you click the read more, referring to the dotted separation line as a “cut.”

Usenet: A collection of text-only discussion boards that fans used to communicate in earlier stages of internet development. The original usenet instance is closed, but the same structure exists on other providers today. Read more about Usenet.

UST: Abbreviation for “unresolved sexual tension: Refers to fanworks or source materials that contain perceived or actual sexual tension that is never addressed/satisfied. Less used is the abbreviation RST, “resolved sexual tension.” Read more about UST.

UwU: An emoticon of a cute face, indicating cuteness/fluffiness, often to a point of excess/annoyance. Popular with furries. Can also be used to refer to a cutesy manner of speaking.

Uwuification: The act of making something cutesy. This may be used positively or negatively; when it’s used negatively it’s generally to express frustration that something or someone has been made cute/sweet/innocent in defiance of their perceived “actual” canon characterization. Read more about UwU and uwuification.

Lexicon Entries Beginning with V:

Vine: A short video service; vine video compilations are still available on YouTube. Read more about Vine.

Lexicon Entries Beginning with W: (read more)

w/a: Abbreviation for “writing as.” An abbreviation used in writing circles when an author uses more than one name to write under and are public about doing so; especially common when an author has transitioned and some books are in an old name or deadname.

WAFF: Abbreviation for “warm and fluffy feelings.”

Wank: Originally slang for jerking off, wank has come to mean nonsense/rubbish in the UK, and from there, in fandom it’s come to mean trolling/drama/discourse that’s seen as pointless nonsense or just a term for such discussions in general. Using wank to apply to discourse generally implies that the person calling it wank considers it, essentially, pointless. Read more about usages of the term “wank” in fandom.

Wattpad: A writing platform used by some fan creators to post their writing, with monetization options and some shady language in their terms of service. Visit Wattpad.

Wayback Machine: Another name for The Internet Archive, a website that allows users to see older, archived versions of websites, including webpages no longer available elsewise/that have been deleted on their original servers. Named after Peabody and Sherman’s machine in The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle. Visit the Wayback Machine.

Webring: A collection of discrete websites that are loosely affiliated with each other by a common purpose or theme, who agree to link to each other so users of one site might easily find the others. A fixture of the old web, when search engines were much less reliable. Joining a webring often involved an application process, and member webpages would include a graphic associated with the webring and link(s) to other member sites, in an order that’d loop (as in, visit next page -> visit next page would eventually take you back to the beginning), hence the name “ring” in the name. Read more about webrings.

Weeaboo: A usually derogatory term for a Western fan who is extremely into Japanese fandoms. Often shortened to “weeb.” Though it’s use was originally always negative, some people have assumed the name by choice and embraced it. Read more about the term “weeaboo.”

White Knighting: A behavior in which someone wants to be a white knight, so “rides to the rescue” of an underdog or oppressed group, and then continue to force their help others no matter how little their supposed benefactor wants the help – and then often getting upset that their help wasn’t more appreciated. Read more about white knighting.

Whitelist: A list of entities that are exceptions to a given rule, filter, or objection. Sometimes used to indicate that the entities on the list should be prioritized. Some social media platforms include “whitelisting” functionality; entering a term of the whitelist ensures you’ll see posts that include that term even if they’d otherwise be blocked because of other filters in use. See also: blacklist.

Whitewashing: When depictions of characters are portrayed as whiter than they are in their original iteration. Examples: lighter skin, anglicized names, white actors cast for BIPOC characters, erasure of culture, etc. Read more about whitewashing in fandom.

Whump: A genre in which pain, often gratuitous, is inflicted on a character or characters. Frequently paired with hurt/comfort. Read more about whump.

WIP: Abbreviation for “work in progress.”

WLW: Abbreviation for “women loving women.” A term for romantic/sexual attraction between women. See also: MLM, Sapphic.

Woobie: A woobie is a character one feels sorry for, sometimes with cause, sometimes without. To woobify a character is to take a character and remove everything that might make them morally gray, controversial, problematic, etc, and is similar to uwuification. Often used derisively when an individual feels sorry for a character for reasons that are a) not actually sympathy-provoking and/or b) not based in that character’s canon reality. Some people use woobification to mean imply feminization of canonically male characters or infantilization of characters of any gender. Read more about woobies.

World Heritage Post: 1. A Tumblr post that has achieved some level of consistent fame/infamy, such that references to it have entered common Tumblr vocabulary. 2. A post, regardless of applicability of the first definition, that has been reblogged and tagged by Tumblr user world-heritage-posts. 3. [Thing] Heritage Post is the same, but for [Thing], often a fandom or other popular thing (for example, there’s a blog that reblogs “boob heritage posts.”)

Writblr: The writing community on Tumblr. See [Thing]blr (pending).

Wuxia: A genre of Chinese fiction focused on martial arts. Read more about wuxia.

[feralphoenix]

SWEET DREAMS ARE MADE OF THIS: The Mechanics of the Infection

welcome back to feral’s essay tag where the hot takes don’t stop from keep being hot!

this particular meta has a Lot of citations from canon, and my plan is to have them as actual footnotes in the dreamwidth mirror when that goes up (as i always crosspost my meta there in case my layout text is too small for any folks accessing these from computer and not mobile).

CONTENT WARNING FOR TONIGHT’S PROGRAM: This essay contains discussion of body horror, cancer, and many of the darker aspects of Hallownest’s society.

ALSO, AS USUAL: I read Hollow Knight as anti-colonialist fiction and all of my meta approaches the text from that angle. This essay is strongly critical of the Pale King and Hallownest, and affords sympathy to pre-Hallownest societies & native characters, including Radiance. If you come from a Christian cultural background (regardless of whether you currently practice the religion or not), some of the concepts I am going to discuss may be challenging for you. Please be responsible in your choice whether to engage with this content, and also, be respectful here or wherever else you’re discussing this essay. Thanks.

SWEET DREAMS ARE MADE OF THIS: The Mechanics of the Infection

If you’ve ever looked through my Hollow Knight tags, you have probably seen me joke about the Infection like a lot, usually along the lines of Radiance casting Level 9 Inflict Tang on Hallownest, or “(radi voice) the End of EVA will continue until you Let My People Go” or some such. In addition to being some of the most beautiful body horror I’ve yet seen in fiction, its appearance also makes it a veritable meme factory.

It is also something that inspires a lot of very wild theorizing amongst fans, because canon tells us WHY the Infection exists but doesn’t ever directly explain WHAT it is. To name just a few of the guesses I’ve seen, people have posited that it could be some sort of pupa juice, or maybe some type of parasitic fungus.

I have my own guess, though, and it’s based on hints we can find in-game. I would like to share it with the class today, so let’s take a quick look through the sauce, starting with what we already know!

WHY

We learn why the Infection happened from Seer and Moss Prophet, and this is also summed up more directly in Team Cherry’s dev notes attached to Seer.

The Pale King wanted to be the only god of light in the crater,* so he tried to kill Radiance by thralling her children - attracting the moths with his light and making them forget about her,** assimilating them into Hallownest. Radiance survived because some moths still remembered and tried to preserve what they could of their original culture,*** and eventually she attempted to reassert her existence and communicate with the bugs of the crater by speaking to them through their dreams. However, the Pale King realized what was happening and ordered his worshippers to shut her out.****

Radiance did not give up, and continued to broadcast her message through dreams. This unstoppable force VS immovable object conflict could not last forever - something eventually had to give, and what gave was the mortals.***** The Infection was an accident that Radiance did not initially intend, but presumably chose to weaponize after the fact as a way to attempt to pressure TPK into releasing the moths and leaving her alone (or, barring that, a way to thoroughly destroy his kingdom at the very least).

SOURCES:

* “No blazing kin. Only one light shall shine against the dark.” - Lore tablet hidden beside the Pale King’s throne in the White Palace.

** “None of us can live forever, and so we ask those who survive to remember us. Hold something in your mind and it lives on with you, but forget it and you seal it away forever. That is the only death that matters.” - Seer’s 1200 Essence dialogue.

*** “But the memories of that ancient light still lingered, hush whispers of faith... Until all of Hallownest began to dream of that forgotten light.” - Seer’s 2400 Essence dialogue.

**** “The King and the bugs of hallownest resisted this memory/power and it started to manifest as the infection.” - from Team Cherry’s dev notes attached to Seer.

***** “Light is life, beaming, pure, brilliant. To stifle that light is to suppress nature. Nature suppressed distorts, plagues us.” - Moss Prophet's dialogue.

HOW

Now that we’ve recapped why the Infection exists, let’s examine the process of how the Infection works. We see some examples of this with various characters in-game, and the Hunter also shares his observations of the Infection’s mechanics in his commentary on the Infected Crossroads entries.

Since we’ll be bringing up the Hunter's Journal here, I want to first examine three entries to establish its dual authorship and how trustworthy it is: The Shade’s entry, the Lightseed’s, and Radiance’s.

We know that the bottom section of the Hunter’s Journal is the Hunter’s personal notes on each creature because the game itself tells us so. So who writes the notes on top that give a brief explanation of what each creature is? It’s a common fan theory that Ghost writes these, which I believe is indeed the case.

First let’s look at the Shade, which is automatically unlocked when we receive the Hunter's Journal in-game regardless of whether we have died and fought the Shade or not. Mechanically this is important because if the Shade weren’t unlocked by default it would be impossible to attain the Hunter achievements without dying at least once - this would REALLY suck for anybody who likes to suffer enough to try to complete the journal in Steel Soul mode.

The Shade’s entry reads:

Echo of a previous life. Defeat it to retake its power and become whole.

-

Each of us leaves an imprint of something when we die. A stain on the world. I don’t know how much longer this kingdom can bear the weight of so many past lives...

Notice that the top text knows exactly what the Shade is and how it works. In story terms, this would imply that Ghost has died and come back enough pre-game to understand the mechanics of how their revivals work.

The Lightseed’s entry reads:

A single-celled organism, completely infected. Scurries about simple-mindedly.

-

Strange air has been seeping down from above for years. Some of the air became liquid, and some of that liquid became flesh, and some of that flesh came to life. I don’t know what to make of it.

In this entry, the top text assumes that Lightseeds are a Lifeseed-like creature that has been infected, and the Hunter’s notes reveal that this is incorrect and the Lightseeds were actually born from the Infection itself. From this we learn that the top text isn’t omniscient and can be mistaken: It’s written from a limited perspective.

And here’s Radi’s entry:

The light,* forgotten.

-

The plague, the infection, the madness that haunts the corpses of Hallownest... the light that screams out from the eyes of this dead Kingdom. What is the source? I suppose mere mortals like myself will never understand.

Here, the top text has information that the Hunter doesn’t, and which only a handful of bugs are privy to anymore.

From these three examples, I believe it is safe to say that Ghost is in fact the author of the journal entries’ top segments.

It’s important to remember that the observations these characters make can be not wholly correct, and I’ll bring that up when I believe it to be relevant, but for now let’s build a picture of how a case of the Infection generally progresses by looking at the Hunter’s commentary on Infected Crossroads enemies, and at a handful of characters whose Infection we directly observe: Bretta, Sly, Myla, and Moss Prophet.

The Hunter describes the broad arc of Infection progression in the Violent Husk's entry: “First [the bugs of Hallownest] fell into deep slumber, then they awoke with broken minds, and then their bodies started to deform...”

The two NPCs who we can save from becoming Infected, Bretta and Sly, are initially found emitting orange fog and mumbling to themselves. In Bretta’s case, when listened to, she initially talks about being left behind and forgotten** as she assumes that all people will treat her this way even though she craves affection and attention; Dream Nailed either before or after being listened to, she mentions a “shining figure”.***

Meanwhile, Sly speaks about his pupil Oro and someone named Esmy, and when his symptoms subside he identifies that he was led to the Crossroads village ruins by a dream.****

Listening to Bretta and Sly completely brings them back to reality, after which they leave the underground area entirely to return to Dirtmouth. However, when the player encounters Myla after defeating Soul Master and obtaining Descending Dive, listening to her does not cause any change in her condition despite that she is not yet hostile.

During these encounters, Bretta is surrounded by orange fog, Sly is surrounded by orange fog and his eyes have also begun to turn orange, and Myla's eyes are glowing but there is no fog around her. So, we can deduce that for as long as the orange fog is present, a bug may still be awoken and cured (Bretta and Sly both show no signs of relapse over the course of the game), but once the fog disappears the bug can no longer be saved by external means.

The "deformation" that the Hunter mentions in the Violent Husk entry refers to the large blobs of Infection that develop on the bodies of creatures that have been infected for a long period of time. We observe these upon the Infected Crossroads enemies, as well as on Hollow and the Moss Prophet. We also see that these Infection tumors can eventually kill bugs once they grow too large and impede bodily functions, just like real cancer: The Moss Prophet and Mossy Vagabonds are all discovered in this state after the Crossroads become infected, as are the Husk Guards in the Crossroads.

So, the progression we can see here is that bugs become infected through their dreams, and while they can initially be woken, if left alone they will fall into too deep a sleep to wake up. Some time after this they will start to move around again but will be hostile to any creatures that are not infected. And, if left in this state for a very long period of time, they will develop tumorous growths which are potentially fatal.

Potentially fatal. This is an interesting contradiction to a basic assumption that most players - and even Ghost and the Hunter - seem to hold about the Infection: That is, that the Infection functions like a pop-culture zombie plague, and infected creatures are all undead (reanimated dead things that can't be killed); thus that the enemies that respawn after resting or going offscreen are the same ones that Ghost just murdered, and have simply been reanimated by the Infection once again.

But infected creatures can die of the Infection. What’s more, bosses and unique instances of generic enemies (such as Myla and the Moss Knight at the pier of Unn’s lake) do not respawn once killed. And it’s definitely not that Ghost killed them that counts: Traitor Lord dies whether Ghost fights him solo or whether Cloth is brought along, in which case she always gets the final blow. This creates the argument that the respawning generics are NOT in fact the same individuals reanimated over and over, but different individuals of the same enemy class, and that their different respawn rates speak to how plentiful those creatures are - small animals respawning faster because a new one will arrive in the recently killed one’s territory sooner, for instance.

Ghost and the Hunter both seem to assume that infected enemies are all undead - many creatures are identified as “husks” or “the remains of [whatever specific bug]” in the Hunter's Journal. But we’ve already established that sometimes Ghost and the Hunter are wrong.

So, if infected creatures aren’t undead, then what are they?

SOURCES:

* I find it a very interesting tidbit of characterization for Ghost that they refer to Radiance as the Light, as native bugs do, rather than calling her the Old Light, as Hallownest bugs did. This has some fascinating implications for where Ghost feels their allegiances to be, but that's neither here nor there right now lol.

** “Ohhh... please... don’t leave me behind! You... forgot about me...? I knew you would... everyone always forgets about me...” - Bretta’s dialogue, Fungal Wastes encounter

*** “...Shining figure...So bright...” - Bretta’s Dream Nail dialogue, Fungal Wastes encounter

**** “...ugghh, Oro you oaf.... You wield your nail... like a club... ...Esmy... how much deeper do we have to go... Oh! What?! Who are you?! ...I see. This old village. What a strange dream, to have led me down here! If you hadn’t found me, I don’t think I would’ve ever woken.” - Sly’s dialogue, Crossroads village encounter

WHAT

In a move very on-brand for Hollow Knight, there’s actually a line from Seer that gives the whole game away - and I mean this incredibly literally, she declares her loyalty to Radiance and says Fuck Hallownest and also hints at what she hopes for from Ghost all in two breaths!! - except that most players are never going to see this line because Seer only says this if you screw up platforming in the Forgotten Dream and yeet yourself off a platform before picking up the Dream Nail.

I do not doubt that I could wring a whole essay out of this one line by itself (and Seer deserves an essay from me so maybe I will), but today the part we’re concerned with is the third line of this dialogue, i.e. how she describes the Dream Nail to Ghost: “The power to wake this world from its slumber[.]”

Its slumber.

The Infection doesn’t only spread through dreams. It is a dream.

To put it in a more meta/video game mechanics sort of way, the Infection is a status ailment. Sleep exists as a common status ailment in RPGs, strategy games, and even some adventure games and platformers. Usually the status ailment of sleep is a mild nuisance that wears off after time, when a character is struck, or if the requisite curative is used; in comparison the Infection is Sleep But Bass Boosted. Appropriate, for a glorified status ailment that’s inflicted by the literal actual god of dreams.

The Infection can only be cured in the very early stages. Once an infected creature has fallen into a coma, there’s no longer any hope of a third party breaking the curse... and also, infected creatures sleepwalk. Violently.

This may also provide an explanation for why mummified bugs in the catacombs have been infected, too: If they were freshly dead and their lingering spirit was still attached enough to their corpses, and that lingering spirit retained enough of a mind to dream...

Aside from those mummified bugs, though, I believe it likely that most if not all of the infected enemies in-game are very, very much alive.

Beyond all the dialogue and lore crumbs pointing to the Infection simply being a cursed sleep, this explanation makes the most sense when thinking about Radiance as a character. She is the literal embodiment of dreams as well as the sun, so inflicting eternal slumber with bonus malignant sleepwalking is a natural extension of her power and a way to use it offensively without being directly violent.

(I've written about this at length elsewhere, but signs point to Radiance having been a pacifist prior to the Pale King’s invasion. Short version: The Moth Tribe were pacifists and Radiance was the center of their culture so it would be odd if she were an exception; she is incapable of inflicting any physical harm whatsoever in a game where lack of contact damage from an active enemy indicates helplessness and such enemies always flee from Ghost unless they have a tool they can use to fight with; her behavior in her boss battles indicates a lack of combat experience, and her nail-generating spells seem to be based on Hollow’s abilities. Real-life adult moths cannot fight - they defend themselves with flight, camouflage, mimicry, and I’m Poisonous So Fuck Off coloring.)

Now, I don’t want to downplay the harm the Infection causes - it doesn’t have to turn bugs into literal undead zombies to be devastating. What we can glean of Hallownest’s ruins suggests that as a state it was heavily dependent on labor to run its industry, so incapacitating the laborers would have turned the whole country on its head, especially because those laborers cannot be woken. The Infection also created an intense atmosphere of terror throughout Hallownest as bugs tried to discover ways to cure it or at least protect themselves. And as the Hunter observes,* because of how the Infection is caused, the harder you try to block Radiance out, the worse the Infection will get.

(A sidebar: Interestingly, the Infection's progress seems to be very slow when a creature willingly accepts it; Moss Prophet has Infection tumors when met but doesn’t die of them until the Crossroads is infected, though many Crossroads bugs are found dead of tumors immediately. Traitor Lord and his followers opted in to the Infection long ago, but Traitor Lord is still at the “orange fog” stage and could theoretically be cured, if he wanted to be. Both Traitor Lord and Moss Prophet are still completely lucid, too.)

Radiance may not have committed any direct violence against Hallownest, but the Infection does incite violence: infected creatures become hostile to and will attack the uninfected. And as we’ve discussed, the Infection itself can become fatal once it’s progressed far enough for tumorous growths to form.

A god smiting the shit out of her people’s oppressors by nonviolently but thoroughly disrupting their kingdom, Especially if that kingdom is a genocidal colonialist slave state,** as a Let My People Go And Leave Me Alone :) ultimatum is not unreasonable. (And Moss Prophet tells us point-blank that literally just listening to Radiance in the first place would have prevented the Infection before it began!) But despite that Hallownest as an institution is unambiguously awful, Hallownest bugs victimized by their own state (such as the maggot slaves and other menial workers) probably saw much less benefit from Hallownest’s genocides than the rich and nobility, and likely deserved the smiting way less than said rich and nobility.

Meanwhile Hallownest’s neighbors - all native nations who are just as much victims of TPK’s bullshit as the Moth Tribe - did not deserve to get caught up in the smiting at all.

Lateral harm in Hollow Knight is another topic that deserves its own essay - and more than that, lots of in-depth conversation! - but, again, that’s not the topic we want to focus on today. I do want to make it clear, though, that infected creatures being alive and theoretically wakeable if the curse should end doesn’t suddenly mean the Infection was actually no big deal. If you want your jimmies rustled, try Dream Nailing enemies that pull from the generic Dream Nail dialogue pool: They are on some level aware that they’re dreaming and can’t wake.***

Clues that the Infection is literally a dream are littered all over the game, from Elderbug’s initial dialogue**** to the name of ending 3, Dream No More - not only named that because that’s the ending where Ghost sacrifices Radiance’s life as well as their own to end Hollow’s suffering rather than only sacrificing their freedom.

Some of what Bardoon and Moss Prophet have to say about the Infection is suggestive of the nature of this dream, though. Moss Prophet appeals to their audience to find unity through the Infection,***** and Bardoon also remarks on this, though he cautions that this comes at the cost of being reduced to instinct.****** Dreaming does tend to come hand in hand with lack of inhibition and suggestibility, but I’m more interested in what Moss Prophet and Bardoon mean by unity, since infected creatures’ thoughts are different depending on what they are and what they were already doing while awake.

There's less specific hard evidence for this aside from how we can observe that Infection blobs are connected to Radiance, transmitting her heartbeat and birthing the Lightseeds, her unintended creations. But given that those blobs do originate from Infection fluid according to the Hunter... Radiance is not just the embodiment of dreams but the heart of THE Dream. So could the Infection be a forcible pseudo-immersion into that capital-D Dream, the Dream Realm itself?

Whether my hunch here is right or not, I can’t in good faith end this essay without bringing all y’all’s attention to absolutely my favorite bit of The Infection Is A Dream foreshadowing: The way multiple parties mention the fact that the Infection smells and tastes sweet.*******

You know... it’s sweet... it’s a sweet dream... get it.........

And now that you can no longer unsee that brilliantly awful pun, I think I'll see myself out!

SOURCES:

* “The infection that swept through Hallownest so long ago... they say that the harder you struggled against it, the more it consumed you.” - Hunter’s commentary, Slobbering Husk Hunter’s Journal entry.

** I’m referring, of course, to the maggots. See: “Weakest members of the kingdom of Hallownest. Generally looked down upon and forced to do menial labour.” (Ghost’s commentary) and “If they try to bargain for their life, just ignore them. They have nothing to offer.” (Hunter’s commentary) from the Maggot Hunter's Journal entry as well as False Knight/Failed Champion’s backstory. Remember also that maggots are the larval form of flies like Sly (you’ll see the resemblance if you compare Sly’s features to the maggot siblings’), meaning Hallownest employs child slavery. In more cheerful news Sly’s backstory must be absolutely goddamn wild.

*** “I’m not...Dead..” “Am I...Sleeping?” “I can’t....Wake up...” - Dream Nail dialogue from generic Hallownest bugs (Wandering Husk, Leaping Husk, Horned Husk, Husk Bully, Husk Warrior) and from God Tamer for some reason

**** “Perhaps dreams aren't such great things after all...” - Elderbug’s initial dialogue

***** “Embrace light! Achieve union!” - Moss Prophet’s dialogue

****** “Theirs is a different kind of unity. Rejection of the Wyrm’s attempt at order. I resist the light’s allure. Union it may offer, but also a mind bereft of thought... To instinct alone a bug is reduced...Hrrm...” - Bardoon’s dialogue (Listen four times, not counting other dialogue flags)

******* “A thick orange mist fills these walking corpses. It has a sweet, sickly taste to it. I find it foul. After you kill these creatures, I suggest you do not eat them.” - Hunter’s commentary, Husk Bully Hunter’s Journal entry, just for one example.

[bakubabes-and-ramble]

Headcanon: The Gundalian culture is based on individualism, the Neathian culture is based on collectivism

Race interpretation part one: Neathia

Summary: The Neathian culture is built on the core values of communities and collective thinking. While conformity within the society is of a high level, they pursue a 'closed gate' diplomacy towards other races - resulting in a 'bubble' phenomenon and becoming vulnerable to losing their sense of belonging. Centralised urban system, with regional reciprocity and redistribution, whereby the Queen plays a coordinator role, and exists as a unifying symbol along with the military.

(Wall-of-text warning ; with block-breaker illustrations, but a huge amount of information ahead.)

Okay, this topic is something I was thinking about for a long time, and I finally hit the point to collect my thoughts and write them down. I've seen a lot of people trying to build up/further and enrich the cultural and social-political features of the alien races we've seen in the series (namely Vestals, Neathians and Gundalians), and I felt some inspiration to put my take on these things into words.

It's not only intriguing to try one's hand on the world-further-building, but I felt, I have to explain how I imagine the build-up of the Neathian and Gundalian culture and society to make the story of the 'Neathian Special Squad' ('NSS') more understandable 'symbolically' and from the aspect of a 'cultural clash'. /For those, who follow the NSS: This is something that definitely happens later on, you just don't know about it yet./

I have to put a small disclaimer here: This entire piece of writing was conspired out of fun and passion towards the series. It was not meant to be a 100% professor approved scientific research, but a seemingly logical untangling of my personal train of thoughts concerning the fantasy creatures of the third season. And this means, there is going to be some personal opinion mixed in as well (especially at the rewriting parts).

I wish the readers to enjoy reading it regardless. You are always free to disagree or not to take it seriously. :) To me, headcanonizing and imagining things always meant to be fun.

Side note: I'll add canon elements as examples or refer to the events of Gundalian Invaders, although I have to admit, I'll do this mostly from memory. So If I get anything wrong, or just remember incorrectly, you are welcome to add-in or correct me! :)

Season: Bakugan: Gundalian Invaders (and Mechtanium Surge)

Language: English dub

Okay, let's go!

Gundalian Invaders - Slightly rewritten

The first and foremost reason I actually started writing this post, is because I had some issues with the characterisation of the Gundalians and Neathians in the third season. One side is depicted blatantly, purposelessly and one-dimensionally evil, while the other is portrayed to be the goodie-two-shoes victims with no backlashes. I wanted to swing over this simplicity and make an attempt at explaining, how I imagined these races to function. These interpretations were explored with the intention of both keeping the main features of the races, staying canon-compliant where possible, but change canon elements/propose ideas to turn the races into interesting (and on a theoretical level functioning) societies.

For these added or assumed ideas to work, some lore elements have to be changed or removed: For example the way Bakugan got to be on the planets. For this explanation see: a further point below.

This post discusses only Neathia for now. (Gundalia will probably get it's own post, as there is much more canon-divergence to be talked about.)

Neathians

1. The beginnings and core values

Due to the power of the Sacred Orb, almost the entire planet have relished in a lush fertility since the beginnings. (And this is why there are huge plants in their jungles. The wildlife also experienced a great upsurge by the life-force of the Orb.) This prosperity quickly enabled the Neathian race to organize into a peaceful and sharing society, because the wars over resources became redundant and unnecessary. The established racial mindset reallocated the focus from the individual needs to the communal efforts, and gives a ground for the Neathian values and collective thinking up to even the days of the season.

Neathians think mainly in groups: Let those be pairs (e.g. Fabia and Jin as fiancés; Linus and Neo Zipperator as brawling partners), teams (Neathian Special Squad; Friendship circles), communities (Castle Knights), and the biggest of them all, their entire race. These are all bigger or smaller communities within communities, and they play a major role in how Neathians perceive the world and themselves. Being in these relationship structures defines their place, grants them their basic mental frame, which they are able to think in, and not only their resources, but also their goals are shared with each other. This kind of goal assimilation is what makes them really efficient team players, and also provides them a strong social support from a mentalhygiene perspective. This important role of the sense of belonging makes Neathians both empowered while being in close social constructs , and extremely susceptible to losing these connections.

Thinking like this, when Fabia lost her fiancè or Linus lost Neo, their grief extended further than their deaths or the traumatic events. Losing strong bonds like these put Neathians in a technical identity crisis, as it is a part of their personal perception and mental frame which were dismantled through these events. We have seen Fabia going to extremes to retrieve Aranaut - and to retrieve that part of her, which was lost with Jin. Just as when Rubanoid was handed to Linus, a new connection was formed to either replace or continue the old one in a different form. Fabia's communal bonds were successfully restored, when she also became a member of the brawlers.

The Neathian society is based on caring and cooperation to achieve a collective well-being. This is why communities play such a major role in their self-perception and world-perception.

2. Open-sources, but enclosed diplomacy

For most part, I've always imagined the Neathian race as an although proud and generous, but closed society. They share commodities with each other - within their society -, but it is very important, that only within it. The outside world (meaning outside of their habited planet) is fundamentally shut out of these transactions.

I often refer to this phenomenon of enclosedeness as the 'Neathian bubble':

Not only their mindset operates in closed communities, but their diplomacy too. They are generally passive towards other races, missing trust and a reason to pick up the communication /Up until the Gundalians came and the war started/. This perspective could be applied to understand, why could they be more insistent on and better at operating defensive mechanisms (layered shield generator), than initiating communication with the rest of the universe (Unlike Gundalians, Neathians have no ships or bigger means of transportation. Yes, teleportation is accessible for them, but I don't think they use it that often outside of Neathia.)

I treat this as an explanation for why Neathia had only asked for outside help after the second shield generator went down - the situation became desperate and already being involved in the conflict, it was time to try and reach out for aid. According to these headcanons, I also think, Serena wasn't putting - or at least shouldn't have put - faith in the Brawlers so easily. The reason they weren't tested to prove their trustworthiness further than one question, is because she trusted Fabia's judgement. Without the support of a Neathian, outlanders are almost automatically dismissed. Their (or their Queen's) empathy and compassion may overwrite this code, but even by then they have to be made certain by proving the cause.

Just as when Fabia accepted Ren, because she had seen how much he tried to prove himself. Winning Neathians’ trust is supposed to be a big and determining moment, because they ‘internalise’ you into their scoiety.

Neathians are capable of empathy and kindness (this is something they actively practice among each other), even towards outsiders, they just need time and proof to accept them. Trust is just not automatic towards them, and even so they keep their distance until they get used to it.

3. Personal paralel counterparts - Night elves and the Highborne of WoW

When I think about Neathians, I often put them into paralel with the Night elves and the Highborne from World of Warcraft. For most part, I use their artistic motives, architecture, fashion and cultural approach as an inspiration for Neathians, as they are recognised as 'The pretty space elves' in my book too.

Beside the above mentioned, what could be imported from their WoW counterparts is a rather matriarchal social apparat. For example, Neathians traditionally having a Queen, and women being present in the military or in higher positions, playing important roles. //Just as by the Night elves leadership, religious and military roles being traditionally occupied by women (priestesses, wardens, sentinels).//

Another elven impression, which is more or less universal, is their sense of pride (I like to say it as the expression of 'Neathian pride '). Highborne in World of Warcraft are a quite prestigious race and are usually said to be a little 'aristocratic'. I can imagine the Neathians being lightly less, but somewhat similar on these terms, when it comes down to interacting with their own or other races: For example being proud of their appearance (Emphasizing their unique V-shaped forehead with adequate clothing and accessories), structuring buildings and constructs based on aesthetic instead of real functionality (using diamond as the main material of construction, structuring buildings with elegant but futuristic shapes), or being confident and showing immovable standing and opinion on things (towards outsiders).

As far as I know, the Warcraft elves used to be similarly passive and uninitiative - even mistrusting - towards other races too. And in this, it played part, that they also had exclusive access to a powerful source of power and prosperity, the Well of Eternity (an almost one-on-one counterpart to the Sacred Orb).

While the half-tribal connections of the Night elves derive from their ancient bonds with nature and druidism, the Neathian society feels more likely being based on a futuristic envisionment of these social relations. A civilisation that perfectly blends technology (teleportation technology, communication devices) with classic fantasy elements (knights), while still remaining tribal in the core (shared communality is just put into a modern environment). /Although I like to lean more into the fantasy setting, the technical advancement is undeniable there./

4. Overall economy

If we wanted to negotiate about their economy, I would say reciprocity and localised redistribution are the dominant mechanisms of it. The basic definition of economy builds on the premise of distribution of scarce resources. In this case, resources are not scarce, in fact, due to the Orb they are very much prosperous and renewing. This accessibility discounts the value of the traditional market trading, and supports the establishment of semi-centralised recollection and redistribution. The semi-centralisation here means regional production and consumption, whereby the accomodation of the population happens mainly territorialy, but these regional centres still have a connection to each other and the capitol. This economy is based on caring and well-being, and the high level of conformity and trust within the collective society results in a lack of currency usage (so, my headcanon is basically, that they don't use money).

5. Urbanisation and territorial layout

The reason we talk about a more physical apsect of the planets, is because the core values of the races both play a role, and mutually affect how I imagine their civilised hubs being developed. Communities form hubs and cities with strong connections - just like their society!

When I mentioned localised redistribution, I was also refering to the urban structure of the Neathian planet. Important to note, that Neathia is not just a city, or a country - just like Gundalia, it's the entire planet. What we've seen in the show is the capital of their urban system - which makes sense to be technically built around / in the immediate enclosure of the Sacred Orb, for it's the source of the relishing power. Assuming this, along the capital there could be a centralised territorial layout with rural areas (cities, villages), and untouched wilderness (due to the overflourishing flora and fauna; the urbanisation doesn't affect the entirety of the planet, there are a lot of uninhabited/uncharted areas).

Here is a simple schematic illustration of the above.

The rural hubs not having physical connection with other centres due to the dangerous and untamable wilderness (see: Giant plants in the show) could have lead to the advancement of the teleportation technology. The cities are connected through this port-system, and also with the capital, which serves as the centre of the network.

6. The role of the queen and the military

The main purpose of the current Queen is an overall governance with the direct help of a council consisting of the local leaders of the hubs. The queen bears not only a political, but a symbolical importance to the people. The concept of the Queen is a unifying symbol, someone who watches over the nation. The Neathians can stand behind her and being represented by her. But it's important to note, that her status is not as glorified as to be a despotic being, and her power is not extending much further than overall policies, diplomatic representation and helping the transactions of the local leaderships. There is much more power and independence shifted into the regional governance, rendering the Queen's position to be an effective coordinator between them and unifier, who keeps the nation together. /Still thinking about the way the queen is chosen/comes to the throne, but I had the idea of the next Queen being elected by the current Queen, so the order of succession is not based on the Queen’s family, nor being a community vote of the people./

The peace-oriented existence in itself doesn't require a military to exists, therefore I treat the Castle Knights as a mainly defensive organisation. This military serves as Neathia's defenders, bearing symbolic and community building purposes. Among the Castle Knights - just as the name itself suggests - the traditional medieval knight values show up primarily, such as loyality, humility, courage, faithfulness and the act of mercy. In their comprehension, being a Castle Knight is an act of service towards their country and the Queen, and is not mainly for warfare reasons. (To some extent, I assume martial arts and other forms of fighting - even brawling - is essentially a spiritual activity, which they pursue in order to keep their inner- and physical balance.)

As we've seen it the show, I assume the Palace also functions as the military's operation base. The head of the military is the current commander (formerly Jin, recently Elright), and under them operate several divisions with captains as division leaders. The separate divisions are Physical Fighting (both with weapon, like those defensive shock-sticks the guards are using - formerly offensive melee weapons until the fall of NSS - and hand-to-hand combat, e.g. used by Fabia), Technical staff (operating the shield generators and overseeing their areas) and Bakugan Brawling (this headcanon part is still under construction, but Elright used to be the former leader of this, and the reason he was promoted to commander after Jin’s death, is because the Neathians' realisation of the war swinging in favor of the Bakugan fights, so it was logical to put him as the next 'general leader'). /There may be other divisions outside of these, I just put out some ideas here./  Every guard receives education to some extent in all of these fields, but they end up specialising in something.

//The Neathian Special Squad (NSS) had it’s own divison under Captain Pyrehart, they were a special strike team with a unusual task: Staggering, forcing back or just divide the Gundalian leadership’s attention from focusing on their assault. Basically poking them with melee weapons until they either go away, or can’t concentrate on helping their Bakugan on the field and their monsters get defeated. According to the story - made up by me of course - after a tragedic mission this unit wasn’t restored, and the war effort shifted onto long-range fighting with Bakugan, Gear and Bakugan Assaults.//

7. So...where are the Bakugan?

They have been mentioned here and there, but I'm sure, whoever made it this far into this theorising information dump, may wonder at this point: 'But what about the Bakugan?'

My simplest answer is, that I firmly want to believe, both Gundalia and Neathia had a civilised and established culture before the Bakugan appeared there.

According to the original lore, Bakugan existed on the planets since almost the beginnings. Now, this is part of those lore bits I would definitively change during a rewrite: I want to believe, Bakugan only appeared in their very recent history, almost as recently, as on Earth and Vestal itself.

Perhaps a Bakugan lore- and GI rewrite explanation deserved it's own post, but for the further understanding allow me to explain here a little: A similar event of raining cards - what the first season started with - occured on Neathia and Gundalia too, caused by the dimensional boom of Michael Gehabich and his transporter. The twist on this - and the effective solution to the problem of possible timeline inconsistencies - is that although the explosion caused this interference at one point in time, across cosmos and universes time flows differently. So technicaly the result of it - the raining cards and Bakugan being transported into the particular worlds - could happen at different point of their relative times - even years earlier or later! On Neathia and Gundalia it could happened a few years before on Earth, which covers most of the questions of the timeline-consistency /such as Ren being assigned to watch over Linehalt as a child etc./

Bakugan coming to these places has only an added effect: Just as on Earth, they are not (yet?) integrated into the society and culture of the planets so deeply to be any kind of pillar of their existence or basic civilisation. There could be a start (as having specialised researches, technology revolving around Bakugan, taking part in the war,..) regarding this internalisation process, but it still runs on the surface, and not in the 'veins' of the culture.

I hope this breakdown made sense in some form or another. I just felt an urge to pour out the content of my head. Looking back,this became longer and more detailed, than I originally intended, while also surely missing things because there is no worldbuilding without holes or further questions. The attempt to lay down the basics was made regardless haha!

As always, feel free to disagree and follow your own visions concerning the races and worldbuilding. :) This post was made to reflect back my personal interpretation of Neathians - just for fun and thinking out loud.

For the very end, I leave a disclamer here, which was supposed to go at the beginning, but it felt redundant to put there, so here it is:

I tried to approach it from a more sociological side, as focusing on a bigger, overall picture, common features, than create exact statements. (I would rather call this a speculation regarding the features of the races themselves, their core values, common attitudes, mindset - and this doesn't mean other questions are fully out of the picture. We are just discussing things, which can be derived from the features of the society itself, and make up a more or less coherent chain of thought for now. Other 'for fun' or miscellaneous headcanons, like fashion or physical traits will be covered another time.)

Thank you for coming to this TED mambling!

[lord-king-saint]

QUARANTINE MOON MAGIC

-----------------------------------

aries moon: cardio, write a revenge fantasy, CARDIO, generate fursonas or gemsonas or OCs, CARDIO, play videogames, wear absurd outfits and take cringe selfies, cardio, plan for emergencies, make memes

taurus moon: read erotica, take your sentimental items and gifts out of storage or your closet and place them around your room and bed, listen to your guilty pleasure songs, watch your favorite childhood movies, cook the foods that smell the best, choose a favorite spot to habitate, moisturize, do gentle movement stretches rather than static stretches

gemini moon: binaural beats, write a letter to your ex without sending, duolingo, word vomit as a self-care practice, make contact with old friends and get the gossip, network people together through common needs (I cannot stress this one enough) ie: connect a yoga teacher whose starting an online class to isolated yogis or people who need to stretch, collect reaction gifs, send those risky texts

cancer moon: read tarot, create a check-in routine with a close friend, download an app that puts tiny amounts of $ into savings after every online purchase, set up group videochats, movies and books are essential, low-stress videogames, cook family recipes, practice asking for sympathetic listening

leo moon: dramatize your emotions, make funny videos and send them to your posse, go through your closet for cute relics and memories, ask someone how you can support them and meet their needs, take theatrical selfies, moisture your entire body, do something magnamious for your home, massage your scalp in the shower, shine the spotlight on someone else's accomplishments, accept worship for your quarantine fashion statements

virgo moon: let someone read to you, limit your phone time, drink tea, eat your fiber so your nervousness doesn't back you up, learn self-massage techniques, schedule check-in routines with close friends, indulge your wildest cleaning/health strategies-- but dont involve other people or it will just be another mess to fix, two minutes of diaphragmatic breathing after every meal, become a plant daddy

libra moon: clean your room, send people songs that remind you of them, dress creatively (it will have an amazing effect-- no matter how shallow it sounds), take longer inhales, lipsynch your favorite songs in the mirror, emotionally support people who value your judgment, read and circulate smut, join forums, make memes, talk on the phone, adorn your space with beautiful objects, ask for favors

scorpio moon: attend to those in crisis, lead by example, make an oath with a friend, watch scary movies or dramas that feed your need for intense situations, write letters to your exes but dont send, start an occult practice, watch "The Skin Deep" videos, take an inventory of your scars, take a trip down memory lane, eat spicy food, masturbate with a mask on-- but imagine its the face of your object of desire

sagittarius moon: send porn to your friends, hyperfixate on an animal and learn as much as you can, watch documentaries, edit your bucket list, contemplate the higher purpose of the quarantine in spiritual terms, then write about it, take the time to review and question your spiritual beliefs, after evaluating start a practice, harness your righteous anger with friends, fact check and disemanate information, take walks or drives but wash your hands, meditate on the power of soil

capricorn moon: protect your inner circle, read self-help books that help you acquire new skills, choose a mentor figure who has similar goals and study them meticulously, read "How To Make Friends and Influence People" again, find innovative ways to resume your craft, take an inventory of your goals and see whom among your social circle is a valuable resource (which may sound sinister but many people want to feel useful right now and need direction), let yourself be a resource to others, play close attention to your elders

aquarius moon: listen to podcasts, make playlists, experiment with the law of attraction, devote yourself to your friends, word vomit with others as a self-care practice-- even if your thoughts and emotions are confusing, keep a video diary for your more esoteric thoughts, moisturize, explore ways to create altered states of consciousness, open the window, cardio for circulation, eat spicy food, communicate with an ex with telepathic images

pisces moon: candle gaze, drink tea, watch trash tv, devote time to affirmations because spoken words are the only way to truly harness lunar pisces energy without confusion, use your intuition to find the source of love within you and serve it, let people pour their stories into you and recover with more trash tv or escape into music or film, indulge your weed products, be silent and breathe with your partner on the phone until you can feel the tension, spoil your pets and plants, pray out loud for the world

TAG YOUR MOON SIGN💕

[5-falsehoods-phonated]

Hey @vindicatedvirgil remember this prompt you sent a while back that was supposed to be Rociet but I changed my mind? I finally finished the original!

At the Last Second

Summary:   Inspired by Snowing in Venice by Elizaveta. In an attempt to get as far away from their hometown as possible, Janus decides to go to college in Venice, Italy. Roman is conflicted over his feelings about it and doesn't know what to say until the last second.

Warnings: asthma mention. Please let me know if there are more

Ships: Janus x Roman, Rociet

WC: 1, 985

General Taglist: (ask to be tagged generally or in specific writing.) @im-an-anxious-wreck @logans-library @janus-is-an-adorable-snek-boi

Maybe my song, isn’t happy enough but I

I see it take flight with the snowflakes above

My coffee gets cold, as I’m staring enthralled 

At the snow that keeps falling outside

-----

Roman snuck another glance at Janus when they thought he wasn’t looking, seeing him still smiling slightly and nodding along to whatever song was on that Roman couldn’t concentrate on right now because they were looking at Janus. It wasn’t as if this was a new occurrence, they looked at Janus all the time. When he took half assed notes during class, pushing his soft, straight hair out from in front of his eyes with practiced impatience. When he glided along beside Roman on his skateboard while they tried desperately to keep their eyes on the sidewalk lest they flip over the handlebars of their bike. When he walked towards them with that signature crookeds smile, straight backed but casual and always ready with some biting quip they would both laugh at. And now- when he was driving to the airport for college, Roman sat beside him destined to waste away in the small town they had grown up in, alone and forgotten.

Admittedly that was dramatic even for them but it felt true all the same. Roman had never really gotten along with Janus until high school hit, when Roman had actually started looking away from their own little bubble and out towards everyone else’s. For the life of them they couldn’t imagine why they had ever been enemies. Janus was smart, scarily so sometimes, often getting into debates (arguments) with Logan and Virgil in any given class and always seeming to have just the right phrase or quote or research paper handy to pull up on his phone that drove his points across. He could sing, though Roman didn’t admit they had heard him while he painted the theater sets one day until many months later; his beautifully haunting baritone filling the theater as if he was the only one ever meant to sing in it. He was also incredibly caring, helping Roman through rough patch after rough patch and letting Roman do the same for him. They had become nearly inseparable from ninth grade on but now-

Janus had always been smart and always wanted to move as far away from their hometown as possibly- namely his family but that was another topic entirely. Roman had helped him research colleges when they were in eleventh grade, jokingly saying that with all his dramatics and flair he should go to Paris to study, citing it as a place to find the romanticism he alway put into everything anyway. Learning he had taken that to heart as a possibility to get even further away, eventually enrolling in and getting accepted not to anywhere in Paris, but instead Venice, Italy had nearly torn Roman in two. They had been so incredibly happy for and proud of their friend but they selfishly wished he had stayed just a little bit closer. Roman dreamed of a teaching job, somewhere they could help out in the creative department helping kids like them come out of their shell and discover new talents and passions. They didn’t need to go overseas for that- they didn’t want to and was in the process of preparing to move a state over to go to a community college to start out that path.

So Janus was moving thousands of miles away for who knew how long (four years at least) and Roman would then only be furthering that gap with his own move, leaving them to letters and skype calls as the primary source of communication rather than their trips to the cake shop or late night talks at the local park. And Roman knew that should be enough, but he was already missing the weight of Janus’ hand in their own and his warmth at their side during movie marathons and their smile and laugh and stupid, sarcastic sense of humor. They snuck  another glance over but realized with a start Janus was looking at them, his hand off the wheel and- when had the car stopped? They couldn’t possibly be there already could they?

But they were, and Janus was looking at them with that all knowing look that always infuriated Roman to no end but he said nothing, instead reaching over and squeezing their hand before moving to get out of the car. The airport wasn’t really that far away from their town, just an hours drive to the edge of the city but Roman still felt they had just wasted it pouting instead of actively being there for their best friend. Janus wouldn’t say anything though, he probably knew how Roman was feeling before they knew themself but the knowing silence was somehow worse, filling the space between them that was about to get so much longer with too many words and not enough time to say them. Nevertheless they grabbed up a bag and smiled at the other, shutting the trunk after him and following to the waiting area. They had made good time, having a little over an hour to waste before Janus would have to board, which Roman had previously been ecstatic about but now it meant they might actually have to talk and they didn’t think they’d have the common sense to keep their mouth shut when it came to how they actually felt about him leaving.

“Roman, did you leave my medical bag in the car?” Janus’ concern pulled them out of their head as they looked around where they had decided to sit, sure it had been among the things they had picked up but they didn’t notice the unmistakable bright orange anywhere.

“I’ll go check, you stay with the bags so they don’t get stolen.” Janus nodding to give them the go-ahead had them turning on their heel and hurrying back towards the parking garage, twirling the keys around their finger as they went.

One thorough search of the car later and Roman was frantically texting Janus that they must have left it at the house, though how either of them had managed it they couldn’t fathom. 

Roman: I’ll just drive back and get it. Text you when I find it.

Janus: Hold on, let me get there since you left me with ALL THE BAGS

Roman: It’ll be faster if I just go. Let me be the dashing prince to rescue your trip!

Roman started the car up and quickly put it into reverse, not really thinking about practically stealing Janus’ car from him. Their phone buzzed from the passenger seat as he glanced in the rear view before pulling out completely, wincing as he saw Janus standing there where the car had just been parked. Several buzzes later and the car fell silent, making them bite back a laugh at the ridiculousness of the situation. They had wanted an out from the tense hour that waiting for the flight would have been, they just wished it had been something a bit more low stakes than forgetting a bag with Janus’ epipen and inhaler inside. Settling further down into the seat they concentrated hard on the road, praying there wouldn’t be any traffic.

-----

Ten minutes.

Roman practically face planted on their way out of the car, swinging the bag up in triumph of finding it or fear of breaking it they didn’t know and was too busy to think about at the moment. Tearing through the air port as fast as they possibly could they finally found Janus standing near the line people were in to board the plane, glancing at his phone before looking around for any sign of Roman coming with his bag. In their haste they had forgotten to text him but they were here now- sweaty, gross and aching with all the things they wanted to say but didn't have time to even though they probably wouldn’t have taken the chance when they had it anyway. As much as they so wished this moment to be their happily ever after it was too soon in both of their lives for that and they’d have to come to terms with the fact that long distance anything was hard and they would both be busy with their own lives.

Pushing their bangs away from their face they finally reached Janus and held out the rescued bag, chest heaving from running through a house and then an airport. 

“You truly didn’t have to go all the way back on your own to get this Roman, but thank you.” Janus squinted at him and chuckled. “It’s a good thing I have this, do you need my inhaler?”

“I’d have to keep it since looking at you takes my breath away already.” Roman blurted, opening their mouth before they could think.

Janus blinked, then scowled playfully. “Roman Sanders, was that a pick up line? You waited until I’m about to leave the country to flirt with me?”

“No! ...well, yes but- I’ve flirted with you plenty before!”

“Jokingly!” Janus shoved them before grabbing at the front of their shirt and stepping closer. “You are insufferable.”

Roman hardly dared to breath as Janus leaned in closer, hands fluttering nervously at their sides as they stood still and waited. Smiling, Janus leaned up slightly. “May I have a kiss goodbye then?”

“If you don’t I will scream so loud security will take you and then you’ll have no choice but to stay here longer.”

Chuckling Janus stepped closer, erasing any pretense of space between them. Finally deciding their hands would feel less awkward resting on the others’ hips, they pulled Janus forward gently and tilted their head with his. The general din of the airport faded away as soft strands of feather light hair tickled their nose and Janus’ hands came up to tangle in their own somewhat frizzier hair at the nape of their neck. There was an announcement that vaguely sounded like Janus was being called to board but they were only held tighter as their lips finally, finally met.

And oh.

They almost wished they could sue Disney only on the merit that it had set their expectations for a first kiss entirely too low. There were no fireworks, no choir to set the mood further. It didn’t feel like the climax of their life nor like coming home after a long and tiring journey. It was soft, so very soft. A simple brush against their lips that filled them with an indescribable amount of joy for such a small action; and then they were being pulled and they followed willingly, pressing against the other just a little tighter. Their noses bumped despite the angle and Roman’s hands still felt awkward even if Janus hadn’t brushed them away but it felt like nothing and everything they had always dreamed it would be because it was Janus so it was good and perfect and like nothing they had ever experienced or wanted to experience in their life.

It only lasted a couple seconds, Janus pulling away only to peck their nose and whisper a quiet “see you later” against their lips and he was gone, hurrying towards the plane as the last call for his appearance was announced. Roman stood there, dumbfounded with a burning face but a chest that was burning  ten times hotter, hands still slightly outstretched where Janus’ waist had been moments before. Shaking themself out of it they turned swiftly and made their way over to a bench by the windows to watch the plane take off. Four years in Venice for Janus, four years in Pennsylvania for Roman.

They could do that.

-----

Maybe my song isn’t happy enough but I

I see it take flight with the snowflakes above me

My coffee gets cold as I’m staring enthralled 

This work is also available on AO3!

At the snow the keeps falling outside

If you like this please reblog! Reblogs helps creators get their work seen!

[wsgeon]

hey everyone! ummm this is peyton (also the mun of lee hyeon) taking a second shot at a second character — i have a lot of muse for this one, so i swear he’ll be around for a while… 🥵 this is ryu geon, yes his name rhymes with hyeon’s & no i do not care ♥️ he’s the lead guitarist/vocalist of meta and also the son of a former nobody rockstar, but i’ll get into all that below! like this post if you’d like for me to come into your ims to plot, click the read more for more info on geon, and/or click here to be taken to his pages: CAREER, DOSSIER, PINTEREST.

HISTORY.

born in autumn ‘97 to a “budding rockstar” (translation: “no yeah i swear our band’s really starting to take off, we sold twenty-three tickets to our last show!”) & a woman with commitment issues ♥️ geon’s dad always told him that his mom left because she had some dire matters that needed to be taken care of and SWORE that she cried the last time she held her dear baby boy, but all of his dad’s bandmates say that she was just some groupie and had to be persuaded into carrying her child to term… who can say for sure?

naturally, there are no pictures of this mystery woman. there was one (1) of her holding infant geon, but then he found out that that was actually a sound tech who worked for his dad’s band… and he just never corrected geon’s assumptions LOLLLL

anyway! he was always really close to his dad, considering they were a two-person family. he has a set of grandparents, an aunt and a couple cousins but they were never involved with geon’s life because his dad is the #blacksheep of the family. geon and his dad against the world, am i right?

uhhh geon was also kind of a black sheep growing up, but he didn’t really notice? he was a happy kid, very energetic and enthusiastic. a lot of adults in the area looked down on him & his dad, but he was SOOOO blind to it because his dad’s a god in his eyes and HE’S always been nice to everyone, so why would they not like him??? because his clothes smelled a little like dad’s cigarette smoke??? big deal

wasn’t troublesome (beyond talking too much), but a lot of people still expected bad things from him :/ “his father’s a dirtbag, i’ll be surprised if that boy doesn’t end up in jail by 20”, “he won’t amount to anything without a proper role model in his life”, “his dad is teaching him how to slack off”, “he won’t contribute anything to society”, etc. he kindaaa picked up on this as he got older but pretended not to because it was more rewarding to play dumb and keep being a good kid(tm) to prove them wrong

was basically a mini version of his dad. same style, similar features, birthmarks in the same places, same “live today, die tomorrow” approach in life, same affinity for singing & playing rock music. ummm he loved his dad a lot. a lot. a lot. wanted to make him proud SO BAD, started his first band when he was 15 and they sucked so bad but his dad was their biggest fan… you know how it is. a lot of people misunderstood him, but he was a very good guy and such a great parent

TW DEATH unfortunately he passed away just shy of geon’s 18th birthday and your boy still hasn’t forgiven the world for taking his dad when he was in the middle of his angsty teen phase — had he known that their time together was dwindling, he would’ve been so so so much better to him END TW

his dad’s band actually rocketed into the charts after he passed & suddenly they were getting loads of publicity, lots of “what a shame that he went under-appreciated” which pissed geon off SOOOO bad because why couldn’t they have had that energy when he was still alive? he’s still mad about it five/six years later

this is getting kinda long, so uhhh tl;dr, he ended up staying with the drummer of his dad’s band until he was old enough to live alone/READY to live alone, but he changed quite a bit. was really going through it, quit his band, stopped putting effort into school. barely graduated. went from being a social butterfly spending every weekend at a gig or with friends to spending all of his time on a pc or in front of a tv, playing console games. the internet comforted him when nobody else would/could and then he met the future members of meta <33333333 #newbeginnings

present day geon is still struggling, has to go to counseling bi-weekly but he’s coming back out of his shell! he wants to fall in love with life again, just wants to tread carefully... outgoing & will talk to absolutely anyone, but he still spends most of his time alone. hard to reach by text, so if you wanna talk to him, you better call/facetime LMAO. talks a mile a minute, especially if you get him going abt something he really likes. laughs a lot, smiles a lot, more habitual than actual signs of happiness but yk. ummm he has a really loud voice, mostly controlled nowadays but he still gets carried away sometimes. an absolute menace during long drives/flights, sorry meta.

funny but only when he’s in large groups. feeds off of other peoples’ energy, really good at reading a room and breaking the ice/making everyone comfortable, but if you meet him 1-on-1, none of his jokes land quite the same.

i envision him as being the kind of guy who carries himself in such a way that you’d assume he’s really popular/out of reach/maybe even full of himself, but he’s... not like that... at all... in fact, he’s kinda irritating when you get to know him. the personification of a flood followed by a drought and vice versa, always either too much or not enough. gets used/ghosted/dropped/dumped/whatever a lot because he’s soooo fun in the moment (if he isn’t in his feelings), but draining long-term.

really emotionally intelligent, in touch with his feelings in a way that a lot of people never thought he would be (probably thanks to counseling tbh). he’s very very rarely the type of person who will make you wonder what your place in his life is — he’s communicative, kind, honest. ummm he thinks that intimacy between friends needs to be more common, so he’s really affectionate with the people in his life. type of guy to tell you he loves you every chance he gets (calling you when he’s drunk, sounding like a clingy ex type beat) & greet you/depart with a hug. losing his dad kinda fucked him up in the way that he won’t leave/hang up until his friends say “i love you” back, gets kinda (re: very) upset if he’s denied that and/or a hug.

TRIVIA.

has been playing the guitar “longer than he’s been walking” (not really, but he swears it’s true).

uhhh he really likes nail art, but he’s kinda hesitant in what he tries? mainly sticks to black polish (or other plain colors), but sometimes he’ll get little designs added in as well. mainly does it himself because he still doesn’t feel comfortable in salons... if his work looks bad, leave him alone <3 he’s trying

inspired by people like kurt cobain, nicky wire, yungblud, billie joe armstrong & damiano david in the fact that he’s not against wearing dresses or skirts on stage. doesn’t do it ALL the time, but often enough that it doesn’t go unnoticed. some people say that he does it for attention because he doesn’t dress like that elsewhere and tbh they’re probably kinda right

interested in history (only SOME... dinosaurs, ancient civilizations, specialized areas like the history of circuses/clowns/skateboarding/punk, stuff like that yk), stand-up comedy & documentaries. could spend a whole day watching documentaries and would say he had fun, has a lot of useless knowledge that nobody gives a fuck about and is kinda dumb when it comes to things that matter

when it comes to music, he prefers playing really fast and heavy rock or punk over anything else, but he actually listens to a lot more soft indie on his own time... he’s too tense these days to be listening to anything else RIPPP

the vibe: homemade tie-dye, ripped slipknot t-shirts, frosted tips, neon crocs with alien & peace-sign charms, chipped black nail polish, calloused hands, cheesy pick-up lines used NOT to land a date but to pull a smile, driving until he’s lost, stupid socks paired with pressed suits, dramatic poetry in an iphone note, etc. 

PLOT IDEAS.

people he met through online support groups about coping with grief

uhhh an on & off relationship that’s been going for who-knows-how-long. the reason for this is up for discussion, but i imagine that he hasn’t given up yet because the constant highs and lows are a good source of inspo 🤪 artists must suffer for their art!

opposite side of the coin — someone he’s interested in, but he’s NOT disloyal so it’s a pattern of persistent courting when he’s single vs intense friend-zoning when he’s not and they’re getting tired of trying to figure out what he wants from them

someone else who likes nail art & can convince him that NOBODY cares if he goes to a salon

someone (probably female but doesn’t really matter tbh) who feels like his feminism is entirely performative… maybe they attack him directly for it or maybe they just REALLY don’t like him and they’re super vague about it idk. either way, please tell him that activism is much more than recommending one female artist a year and saying “clothes have no gender 🤪” so he can be praised for the bare minimum (his heart is in the right place but his skull is empty)

someone super introverted who comes out of their shell with geon! uhhh maybe they think that he’s the one doing them a favor, but in reality spending time with them has been doing wonders for his mental health

other people who like to skate. let’s congregate at the local skatepark and scare the middle schoolers away

someone who inspires him musically, for whatever reason. lots of late nights in studios, idly strumming his guitar and writing lyrics that definitely aren’t about how their eyes look in these dim lights… umm maybe he thinks he has a crush on them but really doesn’t and ends up hurting them eventually, maybe he really DOES have a crush but will (probably) never do anything abt it or maybe it’s entirely platonic and he just admires them a ridiculous amount

someone who likes to make music as a hobby, prob won’t publish/release any of it but it’s fun to imagine. spontaneous meetings with geon in the middle of the night, recording songs together and keeping the WORST takes for the laughs. there’s probably a diss-track of them going in on each other floating around somewhere even though geon can’t rap for shit

night owls who keep him company on the phone, even if they can’t be there physically. them talking really quietly vs geon shouting at them while he plays games LMAO

gaming buddies. come over, maybe you can carry geon through his game of the week or you can both fail but have fun while you’re at it… or you can scream while he fends off that hoard of zombies behind you

i’m typing this at the last minute (literally) so i’m gonna stop here, but i will get a proper plots page put up asap with a wider variety of connections!!! but as always, please do let me know if you have any other ideas. i’m always happy to plot and write with you all 🌚

[starscheme]

Only You

Chapter Twenty-Four: Garnet’s Secrets and Steven’s Dream

After hearing the news of Connie and the Off Colors, Garnet excused herself to rethink a few things. Inside her Temple room, Garnet was pacing the floor. For a while now, she'd been silently watching as her little family fell apart and it was difficult to remain together through it all. When Steven and Connie returned to the beach house with Spinels shattered Gem, Garnet was not surprised. Nor was she surprised when Steven insisted that Sodalite stay with them. However, the news of Connie being taken was news to her. Finally. It was what she had been waiting for.

Though Garnet felt bad about it, she was secretly elated over something she didn't see coming. There was a reason for this. Despite telling the others that she couldn't see anything regarding the creature, she had lied. In fact, Garnet could see many paths that involved this creature, but they all ended in tragedy. Tragedy that she wasn't willing to accept. She refused to tell the others what she saw in fear that they would dive headfirst into danger. Steven and Pearl especially. the others would surely hate her once they knew she was hiding information from them, but Garnet was waiting for something, anything that might change their fates. This was it. Connie had never been involved like this in the futures she saw. The problem now was figuring out how to proceed. She could see a few options, but she couldn't see very far. Eventually, the paths all went dark. This was also something new. So far, it had all been clear, but now things were uncertain. Was this a good sign? Did it mean that they really could change the futures she saw? All of which ended with more dead than she would have liked.

So far, Garnet had been trying to keep Steven within Beach City. She did her best to curb Pearls need to lead the searches, insisting that she needed to be there for Steven now. It wasn't fun to manipulate her friends like this. It wasn't fun going on searches and intentionally taking them places she knew they wouldn't find anything. However, Garnet felt she had no choice. She had to protect them the only way she could.

When Steven brought in Sodalite, Garnet knew it was not going to end well. Sodalite was using her power so much that it nearly drained her and Steven was so dependent on Sodalite now that he never let her leave his side. This was also something she had seen. It wasn't the most ideal path to take, but it was one that would keep Steven calm and inside of Beach City. The long-term effects of Sodalites help would be something they could deal with later. It wasn't going to be pretty, but it was the far better option.

What Garnet had to concern herself with now was how to proceed with everything taking Connie and the Off Colors into account. Since she couldn't see too far down the new paths that had been laid out for them, everything she planned would literally be a shot in the dark. All she could hope for was that these new paths meant the old ones had changed with these new variables in the mix. Without Steven knowing, Garnet had taken his phone, hoping to intercept any calls or texts he might receive from Connie while she was under the creature's control. As long as Sodalite was there to sedate him, he wouldn't noticing. So far, there was no indication that she intended to contact him at all.

After taking a moment to meditate on the problem, Garnet left the temple to make sure that things were still going as planned. She needed to set them on a certain path, one that may have been uncertain, but it was better than the alternative. The first step in keeping them on the path she chose, was to find Pearl and get her phone. She also had to make sure and send Amethyst away on some wild goose chase. There was also the problem of Steven and Sodalite. Especially Sodalite.

It didn't take much effort to find Pearl since she was anxiously pacing the floor of the observatory waiting on news. Though the slender Gem seemed a bit hesitant, she trusted Garnet enough to hand over her phone. No problems there. It was also an easy task to send Amethyst off. The only issue now was to keep any news from reaching Steven's ears. With this in mind, she made her way to Steven's bedroom, conflicted to see Steven looking rather sedated as he laid against his bed, staring up at the ceiling while Sodalite knelt at the side of the bed holding his hand. Garnet really didn't like just letting this happen, but what else could she do? This was the only way to keep Steven safe.

"How is he?" Garnet asked as she gently knocked at the door, hoping that she wasn't about to startle the Gem.

Luckily for Garnet, Sodalite seemed too tired to react as she normally would. She had been purifying Steven non-stop for days since the news about Connie and she was nearly at her limit. "...he...he's been...very upset..." replied Sodalite weakly.

The Gems tired voice was also a small source of guilt for the fusion. She was using this gem to serve her needs. What's more, she was here today to make sure that Sodalite didn't hear the news about Lars today. "...thank you for all you've been doing."

Sodalite smiled a bit, waiting for Steven to finally close his eyes before she released his hand and turned to Garnet. Though she wasn't able to look the fusion in the eyes, she appeared rather nervous as she spoke to the floor, wringing her hands in her lap. "A-actually...I-I...was wondering...if it was possible...for-for me to go and-and see L-Lars...? J-just while...um-just while My Steven is...is sleeping?"

This was what Garnet had come here for. "No," she replied at once.

The freckled Gem immediately deflated. "O-oh. ...but...I-"

"You are not to leave Stevens side," ordered Garnet adamantly. She felt bad for being so harsh with the nervous Gem. Sodalite had surely earned a break to see someone she loved, but if she went into the city today and saw what happened at the bakery, they would be flung down a path that wasn't good for any of them.

"...I understand..." answered Sodalite sadly.

Garnet glanced towards Steven, who seemed to be having a bad dream, stirring in his sleep with tears running down his cheeks. He was reaching out as if trying to reach someone and though she couldn't see his dreams, Garnet had a fair idea of what this nightmare was about. Spinel had been by his side all his life and once he realized his romantic feelings for her, Garnet knew they would have a hard time of it. Both Steven and Spinel had so much to work through, but she could never have seen this monster coming and tearing them apart like this. What made this all so much worse, was that Garnet knew Steven didn't have to suffer quite this much if she only told him what she'd been keeping to herself all this time. Spinel was alive. She knew this since the moment she was presented with the Shattered Gem Steven and Connie believed to be her old friend. Unfortunately, Garnet had to keep this to herself. What the others perceived as mourning, was Garnets anger and sadness over knowing that this creature had taken her friend and devastated the others with her cruel trick. What's more, Garnet knew exactly where this creature was hiding out, but if she told the others, it would be the end. More specifically, the end of Steven, Sodalite, Pearl, and Connie. She couldn't, she wouldn't let that happen. "...just...take care of Steven," Garnet added, pulling out Steven's phone to check it since it was buzzing relentlessly. The mayor, Lars' parents, Sadie, and the police department were apparently trying hard to reach him and Garnet knew exactly why. "I have to go. Stay with Steven and don't use any communications."

Sodalite nodded her head and turned her attention back to Steven. Though she didn't have the energy to fully make the nightmares vanish, she took his hand and did her best to help. If only she could do more.

While Sodalite did what she could, Steven was lost in his nightmare. He found himself stuck in a neglected garden, much like the one in the temple, but far more spacious. The flowers had all but withered away and the stone structures were falling apart. He wasn't sure why he was here, but he didn't like it. The garden felt empty and there was this terrible anxious pit in his stomach. As he looked around the pitiful garden, he could hear someone laughing. A laugh he had heard all his life.

"Spinel?!" Steven called out. "Spinel, are you here?!"

"Did you come here to play with me?" Spinel's voice rang out.

"What? I-No! I came to find you!"

"Are you sure?" Spinel asked, suddenly appearing behind Steven as she stepped out of the dark.

Steven whipped around at once, shocked to see Spinel standing in front of him now. She looked nearly the same as the last time he saw her, but her hair seemed a bit disheveled as if she had been tugging at her pigtails, and her eyes were wild and desperate. Though Steven knew this was a dream, he couldn't help hoping that perhaps he and Spinel had finally connected in some way. It would mean she was truly still out there. Without hesitation, he lunged forward and wrapped his arms around her slender frame, holding her tight as his shoulders trembled.

"I-I've missed you so much!" Steven choked out, not bothering to stifle his tears. "I've been trying to find you! Please-Please tell me where to find you! I'll help you, I'll bring you back home!"

Spinel said nothing at first, nor did she react to Steven's embrace. "You replaced me..." replied Spinel finally, her voice flat and tired.

"No," insisted Steven. "I wouldn't. Not really," he pulled back to see her face but kept his hands on her shoulders. "I thought it might lure out-"

"-you replaced me too." Interrupted Connie as she stepped into the garden.

Steven gasped lightly, glancing at Connie over Spinel's shoulder. Connie looked rather banged up. Her clothes were torn and her hair was a mess as if she'd been in a fight. Admittedly, her words stung, but they weren't entirely true. "N-no," Insisted Steven as he shook his head, "I didn't replace you. I...I just..."

"You just threw me away the second you found someone else," snapped Connie. "I loved you...and you said you loved me too. Everything we went through together...it meant nothing to you."

"That's not true!"

"Then why," demanded Connie, "why was it so easy for you to toss me aside? So easy for you to be happy with Spinel as if I never existed?"

The pit in Steven's stomach was growing larger and it hurt. Is this really how Connie felt? Did he truly hurt her so much? "It-It wasn't like that. I just...I realized..."

"You used me to feel more human..." Connie finished for him. "You just thought you needed a human partner."

"NO!" Steven barked, feeling as if someone was trying to pull his heart from his chest. "You're my friend! My best friend! Just because my feelings changed, doesn't mean I regret being with you! I just...I never realized how I felt about Spinel because-because she was always with me..."

Connie frowned, glancing down at the ground before she hugged her own shoulders. "I-I know that."

Steven wasn't sure what was happening now. Was this a nightmare? Was it really Connie and Spinel trying to reach him? Either way, he was feeling worse the longer he was here. The pain was getting worse and now it was harder to breath, as if someone was pressing down on his chest. He turned his attention back to Spinel, who seemed almost lifeless as she stood there. "Spinel..." breathed Steven weakly, struggling to keep his grip on her shoulders. "...please just tell me...what to...find you..."

"She can't!" Connie shouted, dropping to her knees. Blood began to leak from her nose and mouth, clearly having trouble breathing as well. "St-Steven...if you don't hurry..."

"So tell me! What do I do?! Where can I go to help you two?!"

Connie took in some deep haggard breaths, trying hard to keep her focus as she spoke. "T-take Sodalite. ...Lars...Garnet can...she knows..."

As Connie struggled with her words, Steven could everything begin to fade around him. He could no longer keep hold of Spinel as her image began to vanish. "W-wait! Not yet! I still need-"

"You have to hurry," screamed Connie as everything turned dark. "You have to-"

Without warning, everything was gone and Steven woke up with a gasp. Covered in a cold sweat, he had sat up in a panic, his arm reaching out as if he was trying to keep the dream from leaving. He panted for breath and gripped his chest, feeling his heart pound rapidly.

"M-My Steven...?" Sodalite began cautiously, afraid to touch him after his sudden spring from sleep. He looked terrible.

"...I'm fine..." mumbled Steven before he turned to look at the freckled Gem. The dream was strange, but it felt real enough. Connie was trying to tell him something at the end. Something important. She said that Spinel couldn't tell him and Connie looked as if she were struggling to tell him anything at all. She'd mentioned Lars and Garnet. So that's where he would start. "...wanna go and visit Lars today?" Steven asked Sodalite, already knowing the answer he would receive. Of course, Sodalite nodded vigorously and helped Steven out of bed. He felt a lot like he had in the past when his Gem was separated from him, but he wasn't about to let that stop him. Connie told him to hurry, so that's just what he'd do.