#in spotify organising hell

[ghostighostly-oldaccount]

shout out to songs/artists/albums with names that dont fit on my screen gotta be one of my favourite genders <3

[silly-sirenz]

could you do some Chaggie headcanons general daily stuff

Thank you for asking! 🖤

Of course!! I love these two.

Charlie × Vaggie Headcanons

● Charlie is a morning person, but that's only because of the 8 alarms Vaggie sets.

● They take turns to make each other breakfast.

● Vaggie sees Charlie as a bit of a style icon. When they first met she definitely took inspiration from Charlie to fit in in Hell.

● Vaggie's bow was a gift from Charlie, it's her favourite article of clothing.

●They'll often watch films together. Vaggie points out any inaccuracies, and Charlie listens dotingly.

● Charlie shows a lot of affection through acts of service and physical touch. She'll hum a tune for Vaggie whilst massaging her shoulders at the end of a long day.

●She has also made Vaggie several playlists on Hell's equivalent of Spotify.

● Vaggie is more about quality time, often being Charlie's emotional rock when things go south. She'll offer advice and generally be by her side. Vaggie knows how horrible it is to feel alone. She never wants Charlie to feel the same way that she did in Heaven.

●Vaggie often organises small suprise dates for Charlie. Some of their previous dates have included picnics on the rooftop, taking Charlie to a jazz bar and doing dramatic reenactments of Charlie's favourite books together.

● When they go to bed, Charlie is the big spoon. She is a very physically affectionate person, which usually Vaggie is not fond of. However, she enjoys being held when she's held by Charlie.

[umisha]

The Prince of Egypt - London Musical

Ages ago now I went to see the West End production of the Prince of Egypt. And I've honestly not been able to stop thinking about it since.

I went back and watched it like three times. I watched the cinema release and I listen to the spotify album religiously.

So imma organise my thoughts here.

Before I saw it the first time I was kinda worried I'd be disappointed or that it wouldn't live up to the animation. I think the first time, I was inspecting it so much that I couldn’t enjoy it as much. But I still loved it to the point where I went again (musical tickets are expensive).

The story and characters were slightly to the animation. And when I first watched it I wasn't sure if I was going to like these changes. But honestly, I think the changes somehow managed to make the story 10x more profound. 

If you watch the interviews of the cast on YouTube, I think it's mentioned that they focus on humanising the characters. And to see them more as normal people experiencing the extraordinary. And you really sense that watching it.

The one thing that used to bother me about the film is the part where the first born in all of Egypt are taken. And I think adding Moses’s distress towards this made it seem so much more human. And well raw in a painful sense. There is a part in the song where Moses compares himself to a solider blindly following orders and I just loved having this inner conflict added. 

I think the main change I enjoyed was Remases character. They moved away from a stubborn villain character of the animation. And made him this misguided and lonesome character.

There's a particular scene that stuck with me, where Ramesses’s father dies and Rameses wife’s first reaction is to bow to him as pharaoh. The actor looks at her almost as if to say “what the hell” before turning to comfort his mother who instead of taking his hand also bows down to him. And he just kinda drops his hand. I don’t know but I could real feel his loneliness in this moment. Feel that he almost lost his mother in becoming pharaoh. And how this changed all his relationships.

There was also more fleshed out women characters than in the animation. The queen, Moses' adoptive mother, plays a much bigger role. There was a scene during the plagues where she speaks to Moses and it's just so painful on both sides. Then there's also the addition of Nefetari (Rameses' wife) who is also an interesting character.

Other than these changes in story and character writing, I also really enjoyed the way the stage was set up. So, the stage was quite simple and there were very minimal props. Most of the movement and scenes were created by an amazing ensemble. Like really, they played elements such as fire, sand and water as well as a chariot and horse and a variety of characters. It was really something.

Also the music (I almost forgot the most important part). There were some new songs and some adaptations to the soundtrack but all were amazing. Honestly I could write a whole post on just the music but this is already too long. Maybe another time.

The animation used to be one of my comfort films that I was watching on almost a weekly basis. But after watching the musical I've barely watched the animation. Because the musical was actually SO good that the film just doesn't hit the same. It’s just a shame it's not running anymore.

[zoroshonkingbazonkadonkas]

✰ about me ✰ ao3 ✰ fic masterpost ✰ send me zosan fic requests<3 ✰ spotify ✰ goodreads ✰

small very tiny intro: Navya, she/her (they/them is chill too) adult, in name if not game fair warning: there are a Lot of spoilers on here (especially one piece since im on my rewatch) a more expansive intro's here

Tagging system was so far non existent, but i'm trying to be a Little bit more organised so here's some tags:

#my beloved - for things i like- art, fanart, some beautiful post etc

#one piece rewatch 2024- the tag im using to tag one piece posts bc im rewatching it

#toe & aftg hell yeah

#things im so fucking grateful for - self explanatory

#letters - for asks

#imp - for things that are important

#save- for. stuff? interchangeable w imp

#whoa (for whoa)

#nav shenanigans- a tag i will be using when ive done something (it could be funny or horrible or something im proud of, def one of those)

#later- for stuff i need to read/ watch later

#avi shenanigans- for stuff my brother does

#cute

#nav rants lowkey- for tiny rants

#nav rants highkey- for major ones (there will be colourful hindi cussing involved in both most times)

#art ref

#achievements

#writing ideas

Links I find important under the cut >:]

Daily click for palestine

Fundraiser masterpost

Resources for palestine, sudan etc

Dealing with executive dysfunction

important reminder wrt creating

Hacks to feel better physically quickly

basic cooking

A bunch of very very important links

Life advice??

expressing frustration

Pain scale, Fatigue scale, mental health pain scale

cute little VERY important writing post

essay writing

i. dont know how to explain this. cat and writing

writing advice

writing fight scenes

more writing advice (imp)

something (writing)

ao3 filter guide more ao3 filtering

how to google effectively

commenting on ao3 when you dont know what to say

murder strut

dealing with worst case scenarios

this blew my mind. multiplying kudos on ao3!!!!!

you can leave FAN ART in the COMMENTS of a fic on ao3

becoming an adult cheatsheet

interesting games to play improv

what to do when you see reposted art without credit

FREE online courses

things to eat when u dont have a lot of food at home

cute pokemon reminder stickers

WRITING NEEDS this looks very promising

stuck on a writing scene

kudos crab for when you need it (to bless ur writing endeavours)

how to format your story, a crash course

bongo cat

resources? for artists i think

cat candleholder

dialogue tags

for writer's block

colour thesaurus!!!!!

writing skin

southern accent

gemstones

CRACK PROMPTS SNDXWS D

how to navigate web pages having paywalls etc

documented historic names

search engine alternatives

pro tip for trans ppl that kinda changed my life

disney + pirating

things u can do on ao3!!!!

[2manyfandoms2count]

In anticipation of THE TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT I've been (obsessively) relistening to Taylor's albums, making friendship bracelets and lurking around for clues and crumbs (RIP to us who don't have Apple Music/Threads), and here are some thoughts I've been having, in a not necessarily very organised fashion (forgive me, I'm on less than 4h of sleep, but I needed to write this down)

The vibe of the album: obviously the fact that it's very black and white kind of reminds me of Reputation and Folklore, but listening back to Lover, there's also something devastating about looking at it with Daylight in mind :

I once believed love would be (Black and white) // But it's golden (Golden)

I could probably write an essay on what I imagine black and white could mean in this context, from something you only see in old pictures (in black and white), something that's completely clear-cut (no grey area, either there is or there isn't, either it's good or it's bad), to something that's associated with some kind of mourning. But there was a period of time when love, for her, was golden - shiny, solid, scintillating, unvaluable, that can't rust.

And now we're back to black and white.

---

The quotes we've been privy to from the Spotify library: I haven't been able to not draw parallels with other lyrics...

As she was leaving, it felt like breathing When I was drowning, that's when I could finally breathe

I want to hypothesise this quote is from Clara Bow, simply because of the use of "she". Beyond the link to breathing, there's just a vibe there I can't shake.

Except that whoever she is walked away, unlike what Taylor did in most situations she describes in her songs, ending up drowning in the aftermath (adding to the death imagery linked to breakups).

It also has a Why She Disappeared vibe.

Lost the game of chance, what are the chances? Luck of the draw only draws the unlucky

Again, Daylight. I am so, so afraid of the parallels there are going to be between Lover and this album (starting with the obvious London Boy and So Long, London parallel), mostly because there was so much love in the lyrics of Lover, so much faith in this love. Look at All Of The Girls You Loved Before. It's no wonder a lot of songs are in Taylor's Denial playlist. The uncertainty from his part was already quoted then (Cornelia Street, to only quote one), and yet they, she, went for it. And it's awful to look back and see the signs were actually there, before even Folklore/Evermore. That she maybe had an inkling that she'd be the unlucky one, already.

Screaming, crying, throwing up, etc.

One less temptress, One less dagger to sharpen Took this dagger in me and removed it

Okay so I don't know if this is just me reading into this because afaik it's the only two times she mentions daggers in her songs. The way I read this is that she perhaps feels like she was a temptress in a situation, stabbed as a result, but the person she's talking to in Tolerate it looked beyond it and even helped her heal from the situation, before turning away, leaving her to wither away.

Even statues crumble if they're made to wait I think he knows he better lock it down Or I won't stick around, 'cause good ones never wait

This one is the one that hurts most, but maybe it's just me projecting. Because it reads a hell of a lot like she was trying to convince herself she was one of the "good ones", pretending she could leave, when she was already too attached. So she waited, making herself a statue, (e)motionless on the outside, slowly but surely crumbling away at the lack of reciprocated love (and maybe the other person did love her; just not enough - after all, "you know there's many different ways that you can kill the one you love; the slowest way is never loving them enough"). And in this situation, you can't help but wonder why you're waiting, because ultimately, if "the good ones never wait", but you do, then does that make you one of the bad ones?... (Again, this resonates a little too much with me atm and it might be me reading too much into it).

Come one, come all. It’s happening again.

This one is giving The Story of Us; the story-telling aspect, this time inviting us to listen in, like a Bard would usher people to listen to their tales. A (Tortured) Poet inviting us to share their woes.

---

And, finally:

We Hereby Conduct This Post-Mortem

It's not just the post-mortem of her relationship we're invited to. It's her post-mortem, as per You're Losing Me. Dissecting where it all went wrong; and seeing what's left after it- agony, grief, and poetry.

I can't wait to hear the full album 🤍

[dramatic-and-damned]

Ah hello and welcome to this hell I have created~

Important links and such-

My carrd

My Spotify it's useless I'll be honest with you

A List of my Fandoms

My Family and other relations of this hellsite

Unfortunately I shall be on a semi-hiatus because school~

My other blogs~

@thevictorianwriter - My writing blog

@thevictoriansaestheticblog - My aesthetic blog

@nikolalalalai - a BSD blog without me complaining about my life

There are more but this is all you will know for now

Some shit about my blog~

There is no organisation here. None.

The main purpose of this had been to post memes...that didn't exactly happen much.

My main fandom that I post about is BSD but I sometimes do others as well.

This is nothing but a messy hell hole.

Some shit about me~

I have been visited by self-realization once more and have come to know I am in fact a Fyodor and Nikolai kinnie

Bisexual, poly, aromantic and genderfluid

I have chosen my names to be Mika/Micha/Gale/Onyx/Aspen/Aurelius any of them are fine

My usual pronouns are they/them.

I am a vampire god(so I have been dubbed)

Desi~~~

Matching icons with my beloved fellow fyodor @townfire

[edgeofsunset]

Chapters: 10/10 Fandom: Julie and The Phantoms (TV 2020) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Julie Molina/Luke Patterson, Alex Mercer/Willie (Julie and The Phantoms), Alex Mercer & Julie Molina & Luke Patterson & Reggie Peters, Flynn & Alex Mercer & Carlos Molina & Julie Molina & Ray Molina & Luke Patterson & Reggie Peters, Carlos Molina & Julie Molina & Ray Molina & Reggie Peters & Aunt Victoria, Flynn & Julie Molina, Flynn & Julie Molina & Carrie Wilson, Flynn/Carrie Wilson, Alex Mercer & Julie Molina & Luke Patterson & Reggie Peters & Willie, Flynn & Julie Molina & Nick & Carrie Wilson Characters: Julie Molina, Alex Mercer (Julie and The Phantoms), Reggie Peters (Julie and The Phantoms), Luke Patterson (Julie and The Phantoms), Flynn (Julie and The Phantoms), Willie (Julie and The Phantoms), Carrie Wilson, Carlos Molina, Ray Molina, Aunt Victoria (Julie and The Phantoms), Caleb Covington, Nick (Julie and The Phantoms) Additional Tags: Julie Molina and The Phantoms as Found Family, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Found Family, Good Parent Ray Molina, Post-Season/Series 02, i know season2 doesnt exist yet but i do what i want, The Hollywood Ghost Club (Julie and The Phantoms), the molinas and flynn and carrie and nick can see the ghosts, Songfic, Kinda, Grief/Mourning, Rescue Missions, Found Family Feels, Flashbacks Summary:

Julie Molina's life has been going pretty damn good for the past six months; her friends/bandmates came back to her (and now her family can see them!), she made up with her former best friend-turned-enemy (who's now dating her other best friend), her band is taking off, she's pretty damn sure the guy she likes likes her back, and they got rid of that creepy evil ghost hell-bent on destroying them all.

Yeah, life's good.

Too bad Caleb Covington didn't let the good last.

For the Julie and The Phantoms Big Bang 2021! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ it’s finally here!! months and months of hard work and finally this fic is here! along with some lovely art and a beautiful edit by ryn and syd respectively!! thank you so much to my team for picking my fic and sticking with me through this and i’m so thankful to everyone who’s encouraged me throughout! lots of love to the organisers for making this event amazing! hope you guys enjoy!! please drop comments either on the fic or in my inbox!! <3 <3 <3 author: @edgeofsunset (me)

artist: @thesunwillart 

cheerleader: @jenscotts 

art by @thesunwillart: link here

edit by @jenscotts: link here 

playlists by @edgeofsunset: spotify link here | youtube link here (note: youtube is a better option as it has a specific mashup that inspired the fic while spotify only has the constituent songs)

[artifactseeker-myr99]

So, uh… I’m currently somewhat hyper-focusing on The Magnus Archives and while I have the Scriptbooks for Welcome to Night Vale I didn’t yet continue listening to WTNV past Ep. 120

Apparently a coherent and actually visible progressing storyline/plot is what keeps me hooked and had me tear through the entirety of MAG 41 to MAG 152 (so far) in less than two months (finished season 1 on the 27th December, will continue with MAG 152 today (8th February))

I should get to the point… any podcast recommendations? I was wondering about maybe something fantasy pirate adventure thingy? I might give The Penumbra Podcast and Wolf 359 a try anyway but…

Usually my go-to genre is thriller and crime, mostly murders and/or thievery (I’m a huge Leverage-fan), not so much of a horror person - which means anything in that category that doesn’t have sexual content at all or frequent abuse is also in the realm of being interesting - I do demand a coherent storyline, though

:readmore:

I mean, I would just go through what Spotify recommends me based off of what podcasts I already listen to (which are solely TMA and WTNV) but I’m German and Spotify knows I’m in Germany and so it only recommends me German Podcasts and… ain’t nobody got time for that?!

It honestly feels like the entire selection one gets when it comes to German podcasts is… unsatisfying. I mean, it feels like the entire MEDIUM of Podcast is utilised in such a radically different way in German language area. If there is “entertainment” rather than infotainment/education at all it all seems to be… a talk-show including their host straight from TV, or it’s personal blogging by some C- or D- or YouTube-celeb I am somehow supposed to have heard of. But the broad majority of German podcasts seem to be educational and/or from newspapers, news channels, some other kind of real-life reporting or about economy…

The actual, honest to what’s holy, entertainment podcasts in German language seem few and far in between, unless you are willing to pay German TV channels so they can shove even more of their content down your throat. Sure, the Podcasts on FYEO might not be connected to the TV in-house productions of ProSiebenSat.1 Media SE… still it’s a company mostly producing stupid and useless content that would get my money if I were to make a paying account on their podcast app, which is necessary to listen to their “exclusive” in-house productions at all

Okay, more differentiated opinion since I freshly looked up “radio play” podcasts on FYEO… what feels like a fifth of the category entries (because you don’t need to filter inside of “radio play”, how dare you ask for differentiation!) is audio recording of tabletop RPGs. Sorry but recording your (tabletop/pen-and-paper) RPG sessions doesn’t really cut it as a “radio play”. The next notable part we get is short story collections. Which, yea, that floats as radio play but still… would’ve expected that more niche. Then we have the fan-podcasts, such as reading out fanfic/making podfic, which somehow seem concentrated in the H-rry P-tter Fandom. Also, apparently, it seems to be called “radio play” now if someone simply reads out and comments on existing/more or less well known books and stories. So my point seems to stand… unless I’m willing to pay I am not getting a coherent podcast in German language anytime soon. And that particular app won’t let me filter enough to find something anyway.

HOW the hell is Spotify better organised with categories and sub-categories for podcasts? And that self-proclaimed “podcast-app” can’t even auto-play the next episode.

[beingdreeyore]

I posted a lot yesterday. I’m not going to post as much today. Yesterday I needed to let it all out.

I look like hell this morning. I haven’t slept. I spent so much time crying yesterday that I am puffy today still and I have a headache.

But I am in a cute dress that’s been hidden in my wardrobe since I got here. It’s never been worn and today is the day. I have on underneath that ridiculous underwear I bought that my friends keep hassling me to wear to dancing because it’s slightly x-rated. I have the Spotify Halloween Throwback Thursday song list giving me life. I’ve organised to see my friends this weekend. Just a couple, just the ones who will give me space if I need it. I’m doing my radical acceptance skills at what feels like ten minute intervals and it’s only 7:30am. I will get through this, I always do. I am distracting by forcing myself to think of other things, ridiculous things like which outfit I am really going to wear for the Christmas dance show (even though I never actually go and never perform. I could do an entire Christmas show on my own with the outfits I already own though…).

I’m not letting myself think about things like the show that was on last night. The one he encouraged me to watch and that I have previously given him a running commentary of. I’m not thinking about how I lasted only five minutes before turning it off.

It’s awful to be here again. It’s awful to have more evidence that I’m just unlovable. It’s awful that it played out this way and that no matter what I did I will never be good enough. As always, I am the person on the sidelines making up for the deficits and patching the holes.

But I am forcing my thoughts elsewhere. Physically I’m doing the stuff that would suggest I’m okay - hair washed and new dress. I should want better for myself than to waste another minute on someone who has spent half the duration of his relationship emotionally cheating with me and who claims to not feel the same way about me that I feel about him. Half the duration. I should want better. I should demand better. But so should she. And he should demand more of himself. You don’t spend a year emotionally cheating on your partner and then tell lies like they’re the person you want to be with and you’re happier with them. You don’t behave like that if you’re already in a relationship with the person you want to be with. He did better this time, he really did, but he also prioritised my happiness over hers. Why? Why, when he didn’t want me but he did want her?? No wonder I was and am so confused. He tried so much harder this time but we still ended up in the same place. The place where he says it’s her he wants despite his actions.

I know I’ll get through this. And I know that over time it will probably come to mean nothing because he has demonstrated that I was never good enough. I tried to bend and contort myself into the friendship role so we could remain in each other’s lives and yet here I am again. He becomes just another man who loved how I made him feel but who didn’t love me. It’s going to be a very long, slow journey, but there will be another side eventually. Probably a very long way down the road. Somewhere like 2023. I am a slow heal and my feelings were the really big kind.

Knowing we will never see each other again or speak again is incredibly painful right now though as my feelings are what they are. So I keep reminding myself, on repeat, that he never felt the same. It forces me to accept that this is the really real end. Because if he felt the same, after everything that’s happened and his behaviour over the year, if he felt the same he would be with me. But he isn’t. So this is nothing more than a one-sided heartbreak I could’ve saved myself from if I’d stopped letting myself think I meant more to him than I did. I could’ve saved myself from this. Why didn’t I? Why did I let myself end up here again?

On repeat. “It is what it is and I just have to accept it.”

[yvaineseleneposts]

Kiss and Make up, pt 8

A/N: Loosely based on the film “To all the boys I’ve loved before” as requested by @teehxk

This is part eight of a series and the final part

Pairing: Ashton Irwin x Reader

Word Count: 727

Warning(s): swearing

After the talk with my big brother, I felt more comfortable but I still couldn’t really think. My mind was as cluttered as my room. So I picked a playlist from Spotify and decided to clean my room. And I don’t mean the ‘oh, look what I found. This is from 5 years ago’ cleaning, I mean the taking everything out of the closet and drawers and Marie Kondo the shit out of it. During this massive cleaning spree, I thought it would be a great idea to take a walk. I drove myself to the beach and spend almost an hour there, the sand felt so great between my toes and the sound of the waves crashing really calmed me down. I hadn’t been to the beach for so long, I forgot how much I loved it. Then I drove myself home and organised the rest of my room.

It took me two whole days to clean and organise my room how I wanted it. During the second day, Kyan stopped by to apologize. “So you didn’t really love me?” he asks. “Well, I always thought you were attractive, if that makes it any better, but I believe I was more in love with the idea of dating my brother’s best friend”, I explain to him. “Do you love Ashton?” Of all the things he could’ve asked me, he had to ask this and truth be told, I didn’t really have an answer. “I don’t know. I thought I was, I mean we were so good at acting. Sometimes I pretended that it was real, that he actually loved me. It’s so strange really, I send all of those letters and I never got a love letter back”, I chuckle and look at Kyan. “Maybe you just never noticed.” After this commend, he just leaves and I am flabbergasted. What the hell is that supposed to mean?

I walk back to my room to finish the cleaning when I notice the old shoebox sitting on my desk. I open the box and inside I find all the notes Ashton has ever send me. It dawned on me what Kyan meant by “maybe you just never noticed” because all of Ashton’s notes where in fact small love letters. I didn’t think anything of them at first, some I had never actually read, simply because we were pretending and there it was, a note written with a different colour pen and the date written above it from a few days before the ski trip. I looked over to the clock on my wall, five thirty-five Ashton was still at basketball practice. I quickly freshen up and change my tracksuit for something a little more attractive. Then I run down the stairs and yell at my dad that I might be home for dinner around seven. As I step into the car, my nerves start to kick in.

I make my way to school as quickly as I can, while still following the rules, of course, we wouldn’t want a speeding ticket when I have to declare my love. As soon as I arrive at school, I don’t even bother parking the car, I just stop the car and run as fast as I can to the basketball court.

“Luke! I yell across the field, “have you seen Ashton?!” “I think he went to the dressing rooms, because we’re already finished for the day”, Luke replies and I make a B-line towards the changing rooms. As I walk in calling for his name, I feel like Hilary Duff in that Cinderella film with Austin Ames, where she delivered that bad-ass speech. Suddenly, I see him, a towel wrapped around his waist and his hair still wet, surrounded by a few of his mates. I don’t think about it twice, walk right up to him and kiss him on the lips. “I love you too. I am so sorry that I didn’t realize it sooner, it’s just that Cam was fucking with my mind and I didn’t know if I co-” and right there and then he stops me and kisses me on the lips. (honestly to be honest the biggest cliché ever but eh it’s not so bad when it’s you getting kissed) “So what now?” Ashton asks. “No more contract, no more weird ass situations, just honesty and us.”

_______________________________________________________________

Hiii guys,

So this was the final part, I want to thank you guys for being so patient with me, school and internship have been killing me slowly… but yeah anyways I hope you enjoyed the series. And request for blurbs and one short are always open.

All the love, me xx.

[joecartwright]

JOSEPH “JOE” CARTWRIGHT ( HARRIS DICKINSON) is an EIGHTEEN year old from PENWORTHAM, LANCASHIRE. HE is known around the island as THE GOLDEN BOY because he is DUTIFUL and COMPASSIONATE but can also be WEAK-WILLED and CREDULOUS. 

BASIC INFORMATION

NAME: joseph christopher cartwright

NICKNAME: joe. he can't stand being called joey but he won't correct you or outwardly show his irritation

BIRTHDAY: september 20th

AGE: 18 

HOMETOWN: penworth, lancashire  

BIRTHPLACE: preston, lancashire 

RELIGION: catholic 

ETHNICITY: white

NATIONALITY: bri*ish it really is chewsday innit

EDUCATION: year 13 

RELATIONSHIP STATUS: single

SOCIAL CLASS: lower

PHYSICAL CHARACTERISTICS

HEIGHT: 5ft11

EYES: blue 

HAIR: light brown and closely cropped 

BUILD: athletic

DISTINGUISHING MARKS: he's a freckly bastard especially on his shoulders and in the sun. he also has a scar on the lower half of his right leg from when his 12 year old self thought it was a good idea to take a short cut that incuded jumping over a fence covered in barbed wire

NOTABLE FEATURES: an awkward but bright smile

PHYSICAL DISABILITIES: n/a 

ALLERGIES: lactose 

PERSONALITY & BEHAVIOR

HOBBIES: jogging, swimming, playing video games and making sure The Lads don't die or intimidate old ladies

LIKES: actual football, apple flavoured vodka, his quad bike, when films are under 2hrs and getting complimented because he is so desperate for any kind of validation 

DISLIKES: his routine gets disrupted, sitting still for long periods of time,  hot weather, when his older sister insults their parents and psychological horror  

QUIRKS: swears frequently but can’t say the word hell out loud and trying and failing to diffuse situations with finger guns 

STRENGTHS: he’s a pretty athletic dude and on his college’s football team so stamina, dexterity and being a great time player

 WEAKNESSES: hot weather, he easily gets sun burn and sun stroke. he also has the spine of a jellyfish so he’s easily pressured into doing things he doesn’t agree with. he also isn’t naturally intelligent and fails to pick up context clues (for years he thought archibald asparagus was a piece of brocoli even though he’s literally called archibald asparagus)

 POSITIVE TRAITS:  altruistic, organised  and affable 

NEGATIVE TRAITS:  needy, insecure and he has a saviour complex pheobe bridgers would be proud of, no son you can not fix him 

MENTAL DISABILITIES: n/a but there is a lot of things he should talk to a therapist about 

SHARE 5 FUN FACTS ABOUT YOUR CHARACTER

he has a spotify playlist of bro approved bangers that's full of edm, hip hop and crowd pleasing 00s indie rock. but his own personal playlists are full of folk songs and sad female indie darlings wailing out their feelings. he's a mitski stan (derogatory). he also loves a bit of dolly and tammy wynette ,which is all the fault of his mam,.

everybody thinks he's terrible at video games but really he purposefully loses so that the other person gets the satisfaction of winning. the only time he tries is when he plays mario kart with his younger sisters. he mains bowser or walugi

he thinks paddington 2 is the pinnacle of cinema and he's right

he has a fear of seagull and pigeons. the fear of pigeons comes from his grandad making him go into his pigeon coop to feed them. the stench of the coop was digusting and being a small boy trapped in a tornado of swopping monstrosities was traumatising.

the twilight of adam flight was his first time on a plane. his family were camping holidays or nearby seaside towns only people. his dad blames a holiday to whitby for the goth phase joe's 15 year old sister is currently having. his fine motor skills are better than hers so he's the one responsible for her eyeliner.

WHAT WAS YOUR CHARACTER WEARING ON THE FLIGHT?

a plain dark blue tshirt

a st. christopher necklace underneath his shirt that his never takes off for sentimental reasons

dark grey adidas jogging bottom shorts with blue stripes down the side

grey nike ankle socks

black adidas trainers

this ugly windbreaker that i can't properly describe. it stinks of weed so he's been trying to cover that up with lynx dark and his mam's laver scented washing powder. it's obviously not his. a friend left it at a party and when joe tried to give it back he said he could keep it .

3 PERSONAL ITEMS

cards against humanity cards he stole from his older sister in a plastic bag because he couldn't take the huge box she has.

irn bru inside of a red water bottle with a faded liverpool fc logo on

a packet of pickled onion flavoured monster munch

[thekillerssluts]

WILL BUTLER: GENERATIONAL, DIVIDED

With Generations, Will Butler presents an album with dark themes but eclectic and engaging music.

With Generations, released a few days ago, Will Butler is the third member of Arcade Fire to put out an album this year. Recorded in his Brooklyn studio, Generations is an eclectic work, with varied colours, sometimes closer to the vitaminized punk or the exhilarating flights of Arcade Fire, and other times not very far from cabaret song, a kind of antimony or emotional paradox between the engaging side of the music and the darker themes that are evoked.

In the five years since the release of his debut album, Policy, which served as a sort of tentative premise for the more assertive Generations, Butler hasn’t been idle. He travelled the world as a solo artist, then released the live album Friday Night, went on to design and record Arcade Fire’s Everything Now, travelled the world again, earned a master’s degree in public policy at Harvard, and organised a series of town-hall discussions to debate issues such as police contracts, prison reform, paid sick leave, voting rights, and so on. He also spent a lot of time playing father to his three children.

Sitting on a couch at home in Brooklyn with a mug in his hand, Will Butler is there to talk. Smiling, very comfortable and above all affable, it seems to give him pleasure to talk once again about his album, and to invariably answer the same questions about Arcade Fire that all the journalists ask him…

PAN M 360: During the last five years, you’ve done film, recorded, studied, you are the father of three children… With such a busy schedule, how did you find the time to conceive and produce Generations?

Will Butler: I’ve been building up songs over the last two years, and mostly playing them live when I can, at shows, and figuring them out. I hadn’t had time to sit down and figure out if I was doing another record or not, and last year I knew that I would have time in the summer to sit down with my touring band and record some demos, to see what these songs feel like. So I have a studio in a basement in South Brooklyn, and we recorded for a week, and at the end of those sessions, I was listening back to the takes and said, “this is the record, It sounds great! We have six songs here, we have a couple more, so let’s keep moving!”. So after the band sessions, I would take everything and put that on my laptop and work drafts of lyrics, cross some words, write other drafts… And I did that for about nine months, and the record was done. My last bit of recording was March 9, and then New York shut down on March 14… (laughs). So yes, it was a bit long between the two albums, but so much has happened in the last four or five years. (laughs) Not just in my life, but in the whole fucking world.

I knew I needed a stretch of peaceful time to process all that. And my wife and I, we have an older kid and we had twins two years ago, so you know, all this takes up a lot of brain space! But it was also trying to synthesize what was happening in the world since my last record. 2015 was a year of protest, there was Ferguson and Baltimore and then the election and the shit show since 2016, and now it’s the same thing again, with the pandemic on top… So I was basically trying to figure out how to respond to that with art.

PAN M 360: Who worked on the album with you?

WB: There was Miles Francis (Antibalas) on drums, who has been playing with me for the last five years, Julie Shore and her sister Jenny, who is also my wife, and Sara Dobbs. Everybody sings on this record, and the rest of it is a lot of synthesizers. Miles also took care of the guitars, and I played a little bit of guitars too, as well as some piano and keyboards, and I took care of the recording and producing. I did a bit of everything!  

PAN M 360: What are the main themes on the album? It feels like you touch on fatality, despair, but also hope…

WB: Yes, there is a lot of despair on this record, especially in the lyrics. I don’t think there is much despair in the music. The music is always pretty forward-moving. But the songs are the words and the music, so there is always a tension between what your mind is thinking and what your body is doing. (laughs). I’ve always absorbed the lyrics last, so I always process music through my body, and then it ultimately reaches my brain. Besides despair, it’s being overwhelmed, like not even knowing what to do or where to turn or how to begin to formulate an answer to the questions that have been posed, particularly in political life, but it’s the same on the personal side. You know, some of the songs, like “Promised” or “Surrender”, are about friendships that have broken over the years, or have faded or twisted, and not knowing what to do with someone that you love but that has fundamentally lost you. So what do you do with that besides feel bad about the past, or wish that things were different? So both on the political level and the personal level, I was overwhelmed by giant forces, and trying to figure out what the hell is going on.

PAN M 360: There are several shades of sound on this record. It starts out a little punk, and then slides into the indie rock and pop that we know from Arcade Fire, it flirts with Bowie, LCD Soundsystem, to finish with something more reflective, cabaret even, à la Destroyer… It’s a very interesting pacing on this album.

WB: Yes, there is a strong A-side, B-side feel. It doesn’t mean you have to listen to the record on vinyl, I listen to everything on Spotify anyway, but it has a first act and a second act. The first act is a little more urgent, a little more punk, whereas the second act is a little more electronic, and then “Fine” is like the afterword or something, it’s like an author’s note.

PAN M 360: Seems like you’ve worked on your voice since your first album. You seem to have a lot more confidence and emotion.

WB: I think that comes from very deliberately working out most of these songs on stage, learning what the core of the song is. Policy was more something that was created in the studio… I don’t know… I was experimenting. The bulk of Generations is something like, “we’re here, we know what we’re doing and we’re doing it.” As nebulous as the lyrics can be, there is still a musical mission. And I’m a better singer, I guess. From having to sing as a frontman, you just become a better singer (laughs).

PAN M 360: Looking back, how do you perceive Policy, how would you compare the two albums?

WB: Policy, to me, is like a bunch of different characters. Like every song is like in a different suit or skin. This record sonically changes a lot, but it’s still one perspective, whereas Generations has a bit more of a coherent vision. The record as a whole has a bit more of a sonic arc. It’s not a concept record but it’s tied together both sonically and lyrically.

PAN M 360: Would you say that your solo work allows you to express yourself in a way that you couldn’t with Arcade Fire?

WB: Yeah, I think that’s true! But also, Arcade Fire lets me express myself in ways that I can’t on a solo record. Update one is that I don’t write any words for Arcade Fire (laughs). That’s like a very big difference. And there is a slight difference in ethos, and in approaching recording… Generations is a collaborative effort but I’m more the director, and Arcade Fire is more fighting with co-workers, in a creative way. But to me, it’s also like the same project. You know, it’s like Marcel Dzama, who sometimes does movies with Amy Sedaris and sometimes does paintings, but they’re all from the same body of work, a little bit.

PAN M 360: And what does your brother think of your music?

WB: I think he likes it. In the band, we all think we’re all talented. We like each other and we trust each other. So if they wouldn’t like it, they’d tell me.

PAN M 360: How’s it going with the new Arcade Fire. Should we expect a record soon?

WB: We can’t really work separately. We can do a little bit online, but we’re not good at it… So if the virus stays calm, we’ll get back together and be basically on track… It takes us so long to make a record anyway, it takes us a year or a year and a half. The timing has been different, the process has been different, but the process is always different…

https://panm360.com/en/interviews-panm360/will-butler-regeneration/

[pars-ley]

Until Tomorrow | Part two

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader

Summary: You’re a happily single magazine editor in London, that is, until you’re set up with a handsome musician, who’s not exactly forthcoming about being in the biggest boy group in the world. But with your days together numbered, will this blossom into something more or crash land, leaving your heart broken.

Genre: Idol!au / Fluff / Romance / Comedy / Slight hint of smut 

Rating: 15+ (sfw)

Warnings: Mentions of sex and sexual activity / Kissing

Word Count: 6413

Part one | Part two Notes: Beta reader @ditttiii​ Thank you so much for your help, you are such a queen! 

I knock lightly against the boss’ door and wait. 

Janelle Rogers is the editor-in-chief for our magazine, she’s brilliant but also a bit eccentric. She always has some kind of wacky blazer on and yet, somehow always manages to look professional. She’s also the messiest person I know, resulting in her desk always being untidy, but she claims it to be organised chaos instead.

Who am I to argue with that kind of logic? 

She’s tough and a lot of her employees are terrified of her, but if you work hard and do a good job she usually notices and shows her appreciation in some way, which makes her quite pleasant to work for. 

I get on with her well on a personal level too. We’ve been out to dinner a few times and it’s always fun. It also always turns into a late night drinking session. Going out with her, usually means I am in for a two day hangover, which is why it doesn’t happen all that often.

“Come in!” She calls.

Swinging open the door, I step in. 

Janelle is pacing back and forth, phone tucked under her ear, as she searches through the papers in her hand. Hearing me enter, she looks up and removes the phone from her ear, before she says, “Y/n, I heard you wanted to speak to me, please come in. I won’t be long.” 

She indicates to the empty seats across from her desk. 

I sit down and cross one leg over the other, trying not to listen to the heated discussion she’s having. 

“I appreciate that I do, but I need that piece before the end of the week.” She says, her tone clipped. I see her jaw tense as she grits her teeth to whatever response she gets. “And I understand that, nonetheless, you’ve had plenty of time to figure it out. Your story needs to be in by the end of the week, otherwise I’ll use someone else’s. End of discussion.”

She hangs up the phone, almost slamming it back down onto the base unit and sighs. 

Sitting down, elbows on her desk, she gives me her full attention. “Some people will use any excuse to avoid a deadline.” She shakes her head and then meets my eyes. “Please tell me you’re here to give me some good news.”

I grimace slightly. “Well the magazine is on track...mostly. The music segment however…” I pause. “It’s unfinished.”

Her face drops. “What?” She mutters, her voice low, brimming with anger. “What do you mean, it’s not finished?”

“Only half of it is complete.” 

She slams her hand on her desk. “God Dammit, Toby.” She runs her hands over her hair, smoothing her tight, black curls. 

Toby was one of our writers, mostly for the music assignments. He did interviews with the artists, went to gigs, reviewed albums but recently had gone on a holiday for some kind of meditation retreat. ‘No phones permitted and no contact from the outside world’ kind of place, not my type of holiday but who am I to judge?

“Can’t we just use one of our other music pieces?” I ask, knowing the answer before she gets the chance to respond.

“No, we need that segment. Our sales were up last month because we featured that story about the k-pop group selling out Wembley, now we need to report what the shows were like.” She sits back in her chair. “BTS are very current, it’s what we need. They’re our ticket to the younger generation buying our magazine.”

“Well, that’s why it’s not finished, the concerts are this weekend and Toby’s obviously not going to be here for them. He didn’t seem to have tickets for them either.”

She lets out a long, drawn out breath. “Ok, well we need to get our hands on a ticket.”

I put my hands up to stop her. “I’ve already got people on it but I need another writer to rewrite the segment.”

She nods. “Toby won’t like it but that’s not my problem. I’ll get George on it.” She picks up the phone and within seconds it’s all arranged and passed over. 

I stand and make my way to the door.

“Y/n?” She calls as I open the door to make my exit. I turn back to her. “Good work, keep me posted, we need this story.”

I give her a sharp nod, not sure how possible it will be to achieve this but of course I’ll try my hardest to make it happen.

I head back to my desk, sending more emails and making more calls, when my personal phone vibrates against the wood. I glance down at the screen and my stomach flips when I see who the message is from.

Taehyung [14.09]: So, how’s your day going?

A wide grin spreads across my face. He’s thinking about me. My chest swells at that thought alone and I type a quick reply and press send.

Y/n [14.10]: So far? It’s a day from hell. What about yours?

His reply is  immediate.

Taehyung [14.11]: 😥 I don't like to hear that. My day is fine. Will be better later, hopefully I can cheer you up...If you’re still free?

I smile at my phone. I couldn’t wait to get out of here and meet him. It’s the only thing keeping me going through all of this work, knowing that he would be there at the end of it. And clearly he was looking forward to seeing me too; my ego was quite inflated. 

Y/n [14.11]: Of course, can’t wait. What time?

I put my phone down and carry on clicking through my emails, relieved to discover that I’ve sent and replied to all I needed to, for now at least. I decide to take a much needed break. I put my earphones in and shuffle my Spotify playlist of metal and rock songs that I had put together and turn the volume up to as loud as it can go. 

The ear buds thrum inside my ears as they blare out classic 80’s rock sounds with ‘Pour some sugar on me’ and I lose myself in Def Leppard. Turning in my seat, I look out of my office window. 

The landscape of London is truly something to marvel at, and I would never tire of this view. The way the entire city reflected in the windows of the high-rise buildings, the way the sun bounced off the river and the classic style of our oldest landmarks. London is a remarkable place. 

I sigh and put my feet up on the low window ledge, crossing my ankles. My phone vibrates in my lap and I smile as I see his name on my screen, reading the message.

Taehyung [14.21]: I’ll be working for a while, is 7 too late for you?

I sigh, I had another early start tomorrow but I can’t pass up the chance to go on a date with the only guy I've been interested in for two years. Who knows how long he’ll be over here for? I can deal with being tired for a few days.

Y/n [14.22]: I can make an exception for you. Let me send you the address.

I sent him the link with all the info of Yoshi’s restaurant. If he was anything like me, he’d be looking over the menu and planning his meal.

Taehyung [14.25]: Then I am flattered. See you there :)

I grin at my phone like an idiot. God, how old was I? I’m sitting here embarrassing myself, acting like a seventeen year old love sick teenager over a guy I barely know. 

I kept picturing his face, his smile, the way he raises an eyebrow so seductively, or the way he runs a hand through his dark brown hair. I’m not sure if my memory of him does him justice. 

I pause my playlist and quickly dial Yoshi’s number, waiting for him to pick up.

“Yo! What’s happening, jelly bean?” His usually cheerful voice rings out.

“I’m wondering something?” I ask hesitantly.

“Wondering...if I’m as good in the sack as people say? Why yes, I am.” He quips.

I roll my eyes. “No one says that and I would never be wondering that.” 

His laugh vibrates my ear. “Your loss. So what are you wondering then?”

“Well, do you have a table for two for tonight at seven?” I bite my lip, waiting for the response.

“If the table’s for you, for sure! Who you bringing with you this time? Taylor?” He asks, mentioning one of my oldest and closest friends who has been with me to his restaurant many times.

I hesitate. “...No. I’m bringing a...date, actually?” I hold my breath as I wait for his reaction.

“Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat!” He exclaims, so loud I have to quickly turn the call volume down before he deafens me. “Hold up, you can’t just drop a bomb like that on me! Who is it? How did you meet? It’s the tourist guy you bumped into, isn’t it? I told you y/n, I told you he thought it was a date.” He bombards me, laughing out of excitement.

“Actually,” I cut in, “It’s not him.” I hear the groan of disappointment on the other end. “It’s his friend.” I laugh.

“Well damn girlfriend! I’m impressed. I can’t wait to hear more about this. Your table will be ready at seven, don’t worry, I got you.” 

I smile. “Thank you, I really appreciate it. And Yoyo?”

“Yea?” He waits, the grin in his voice audible.

“Please, nothing embarrassing.” I practically whine.

He gasps. “Would I ever?” He pauses. “On second thoughts, don’t answer that. Heart crossed and hope to die, I shall be on my best behaviour.”

My shoulders relax a little. “Thank you. See you later.”

I hang up and remove my earphones, releasing a long, slow breath. That didn’t go as badly as I had imagined it would, he let me off surprisingly easy. Maybe going there tonight won’t be as mortifying as I’m imagining.

My work phone rings and I push the thoughts of Taehyung and tonight’s date out of my head and get back to work.

The afternoon goes slow, my eyes constantly finding the clock to see how much time has passed; counting down the hours till I could leave and meet him. 

I wade through my workload; like trudging through mud. I haven’t had any luck with finding a ticket to the BTS concert at the weekend. Any hope I did have was fading fast, well aware of the fact that I was running out of time. I had 3 days until the concert took place, I couldn’t give up; my boss wouldn’t allow it. 

I work past my usual time, wanting to get as much as I can done today, so it might allow me some more freedom for the rest of the week.

At six o’clock I am strutting out the door, after touching up my make-up and fluffing my hair in the washroom. I had decided to take the underground to ride the few stops to the restaurant. Once out of the stuffy tube station, I send a message to Taehyung letting him know that I’m walking from the station and will be there shortly. The text I get back however, has me practically running to the doors of the restaurant.

Taehyung [18.47]: I’m inside :)

My heart drops. But surely Yoshi wouldn’t have any idea who my date was or what he looked like, so Taehyung should be safe.

I yank open the heavy, double doors frantically searching for him. When my eyes finally find him, I gulp. Him and Yoshi are both sitting at a table, deep in conversation. I quickly rush over, interrupting them.

“Taehyung, I see you’ve met my friend, Yoshi.” I smile nervously, as they both stand up to greet me.

Yoshi gets there first, pulling me into a tight hug and squeezing me hard. I pat him on the back. “Ok, I tap out.” I wheeze,and he releases me. “Try to not injure me before my date, will you?” 

He laughs. “Introductions have already been made, so you don’t need to worry. I was just filling  Taehyung in here, about some of our adventures.” He winks.

I scowl at him. “Ok, ok, enough embarrassing stories.” I take my bag from my shoulder and put it with my blazer onto the far side of the seat in the booth. 

Yoshi grins. “Ok, I’ll leave you to it. Taehyung, very nice to meet you. Someone will be over soon to take your order. Enjoy guys!” He says with another wink, before he quickly proceeds to leave us alone.

We both stand there smiling at each other before I lean in, kissing him on the cheek. I linger there for a moment but I stiffen when I feel his breath at my ear. 

“Nice to see you again.” He greets softly. His deep voice like silk, doing things to my body I didn’t expect. 

I pull away, blushing slightly. “Shall we?” I indicate to the seats in the booth. He nods and we slide in. 

One of the best things here was the decor, it gave us a lot more privacy than other places I’ve been to. The booths had partition doors which I could close completely or leave open slightly. The partitions behind our seats were completely covered with painted japanese murals and there were beautiful, pink blossoms hanging from the ceiling.

“Were you here very long?” I ask, trying to gauge how much time they would have had to speak to each other.

He shakes his head. “Long enough to hear how you met each other and the story about the time you spilt a drink in your lap at a theme park and he told everyone you walked passed, that you had wet yourself.”

I laugh and roll my eyes at the memory. “That’s Yoshi for you. Never passes up the chance to embarrass me.”

Taehyung smiles. “He also said some very nice things about you.”

“That is good to hear but he has to, he knows I’d bully him otherwise.” 

He laughs at that. “You two seem very close.”

I nod. “We are. He’s been my best friend for a long time.”

“It’s good to have someone like that.”

I nod again, agreeing. “Do you have a best friend?”

He smiles. “Yes, his name’s Jimin.”

“And would he embarrass you like Yoshi does to me?”

He shakes his head, then leans in closer. “Worse, much worse.”

I chuckle. “Well in that case, I hope I get to meet him one day.” I reply, a smirk playing across my lips. 

He fights his smile. “Perhaps you will soon.”

I raise an eyebrow at him quizzically. “Is he over here also?”

He nods slowly. “Yep and yes, he’s another musician.”

He answers my unasked question and I lean back in my seat, surprise evident on my face. “Really? I’m guessing you still don't want to tell me about your job?”

I notice a flicker of sadness flash in his eyes, before they look down and away from my questioning gaze. I feel immediate guilt in my gut. “Hey, it’s ok, you don’t have to tell me anything, you just seem quite secretive about it. I was saying it more as an observation.” I reassure.

He looks up, eyes wide, “I’m not secretive!” He exclaims, shocked. “I want to tell you but—”

“Hey,” I cut him off, “No need to explain. Don’t worry, you can tell me whenever you’re ready.” I give him a reassuring smile and a gentle pat on the hand he had placed above the table.

I see him stiffen for a moment and my response is to do the same, until he turns his hand over, so we're palm to palm and gives it a little squeeze. His shoulders relax and so do mine, even though my heart hammers wildly with excitement. I can feel my palm starting to sweat the longer his touch lingers on me, it feels like a lifetime before he finally lets go and pulls his hand away. 

I can breathe and think straight again.

While I was more than happy to wait for him to tell me about his work, I found myself growing increasingly curious about the subject. He’s so mysterious, I can’t understand why he won't talk about it. I would assume that being a musician would be a  cool profession to divulge about,  most would probably gush till their heart's content, given the opportunity. 

But, in a way I’m glad he’s not like that, I don’t think I would be able to  stand the egotistical bragging.

“Can I take your drink order?” A sweet voice asks, stepping in between the sliding doors. I look up and recognise the server as Emiko. She’s worked here for a while now, and is always pleasant

“Oh, hi y/n! So nice to see you.” She beams her usual toothy grin.

“Nice to see you! How have you been?” I ask.

“I’ve been good!.” She giggles. “I won’t disturb you too much, what can I get you two?”

I order a lemonade and Taehyung orders a coke. I did contemplate an alcoholic beverage, but I don’t want to be the only one drinking on a date, that’s how I'm sure to embarrass myself.

I pick up the menu and skim through it, even though I'm sure I know it by heart by now. 

Glancing up as he too studies the menu, my eyes rake over his broad shoulders, the light beige shirt he wears falls flatteringly over his broad chest, clinging to all the right places. His black cap conceals his hair, but I can tell it’s all swept back off of his forehead. I watch the way he juts his jaw to the side as he mulls over what to order. His tongue dances across the inside of his lips, my eyes trained on it, mind drifting off again to wondering how soft his lips would feel. How that tongue would feel moving against mine...or other places. He looks up at me and instantly a flush of red travels up his neck. 

“What?” He asks quietly, giving me a bashful smile.

“Nothing,” I look back down at my menu, feeling flustered myself. “What are you going to order?” 

“Hm, maybe the Yakitori chicken skewers, any recommendations? Yoshi told me you’ve tried everything on the menu.”

I laugh. “That is true; I'm a big fan of his cooking. And yes, you should get that, it’s—,” I give a kiss to the tips of my fingers, chef style. 

He laughs and leans back in his seat. “So tell me, why was your day so awful?” He frowns, genuine concern on his brow.

I roll my eyes and groan. “Work is a joke at the moment, I’m covering for someone so I have twice the usual work load and that’s not even the worst of it.”

Emiko returns with our drinks, interrupting me. I pause as we order our meals and some sushi to share, then she leaves in a rush.

He raises his eyebrows at me and leans his chin on the palm of his hand, listening intently and waiting for me to continue. 

“Ok, so, my boss is hellbent on this particular story. The writer of said story has gone off on an unreachable holiday and it's only half done. So, now I have to try and get a ticket for a show that is apparently so high in demand, it seems impossible, so we can finish said story.”

He frowns. “I’m confused. What’s the story?”

I sigh as I fiddle with my napkin. “About some boy group and their shows at wembley.” I have a realisation then. “You’ve probably heard of them? BTS? They’re from South Korea too.” I’m not sure but for a brief moment I think I see him stiffen out the corner of my eye. His expression unreadable. 

“Yes, I’ve heard of them.” He says, nonchalantly. 

“You don’t like them?” I ask, wondering why his face suddenly looked so solemn. “Don’t tell me they’re your musical rivals?” I tease attempting to lighten his mood.

He smiles and some of the tension seems to leave his body. “No. They’re cool. So why do you need a ticket?”

“So the writer can review the show and tell the readers all about it. Our boss is trying to appeal to the younger readers and she’s convinced this is the way to do it, through this group.”

“What will happen if you can’t get the ticket?” He asks, eyes wide with worry.

I shrug. “My boss will be very, very pissed. I don’t plan on finding out though. I’ve got a few more days, it always works out in the end, one way or another.”

He watches me carefully. “I’ll keep my fingers crossed for you.”

I grin as our meals arrive, steaming hot and smelling incredible. We eat in silence for a while, enjoying the taste. I watch as the noises and faces Taehyung pulls assure me of the fact that he’s very impressed and my chest swells with pride for my friend. 

I do, however, let my mind wander into thinking about hearing those noises of appreciation in other aspects. Like me...on my knees...underneath this table. Snapping myself out of less than innocent thoughts, I focus on my meal. 

Why couldn’t I control myself? Why did everything about him appeal to me in such a powerful way? Is it because I haven’t had sex for over a year? Or is it simply that he is just the perfect specimen of a man? Maybe both.

“That was amazing. I’m blown away.” He sat back in his seat, wiping his mouth with a napkin. 

“I’m glad you liked it! Yoshi will be thrilled.” I beam and take a long drink of my cold lemonade, hoping it cools the heat inside me. I could feel tiny beads of sweat forming down my back and along the nape of my neck. 

We sit and talk until Emiko returns to clear our plates and Taehyung asks for the check. 

“I’m afraid, I cannot stay out late with you tonight.” He says solemnly.

I try to ignore the disappointment I feel; not ready for this date to be over. “Ah, that’s ok, I know you’re busy.”

He shakes his head and puts his hand on top of mine, leaning forward. I mirror him automatically. The warmth of his palm slowly flows through me and my eyes can’t help but float down to our touching skin. His hand feels soft and yet strong with his long, delicate fingers enveloping mine. I look back up to his intense eyes blazing into mine.

“It’s not that, It’s just—” He pauses looking away, my stomach drops as I’m left wondering as to what on earth he’s going to say. He doesn’t want to see me any more? He’s not attracted to me? He sees me more as a friend? What excuse is it going to be this time?

“...I turn into a pumpkin at midnight.” He says, his face so serious it takes me a few moments to register the words that have just left his mouth. Relief swamps me as I feel myself relax back into my seat and laughter vibrate through my body. He joins me, his boxy grin spread across his face but as he does, he lifts my hand, turning it over and laces his fingers through mine. 

My laughter fades, and I look down at our entwined fingers. Normally, an action like this so soon after meeting would have me running for the hills, but with him, it just felt...right.

“Is this ok?” He asks hesitantly, a crimson shadow forming on his cheeks.

I nod and swallow; my mouth suddenly dry. “Yes.” I reply simply, frozen in shock.

He relaxes a little and leans forward on his elbows, his thumb gently tracing small circles on the back of my hand.

“I should go back to my hotel…”

“But?” I query.

He side smiles, looking up at me seductively through long lashes and the sight is enough to make my belly clench. “I really don’t want to.”

My heart knocks violently against my ribcage at his admission. “I don’t want you to either.” I blurt out, surprising myself.

His eyes widen slightly before he side-smiles again and squeezes my hand. “I’m glad it’s not just me. I cannot tell what you think about me.”

I let out a small, slightly nervous laugh. “Is it not obvious?” I raise an eyebrow, surely he must be joking. I have never been so red, flustered and embarrassed with a guy in my whole laugh.

He shakes his head. “Not really, sometimes I think I know where your head is and yet at other times it’s hard to read you. I wish I knew what you were thinking.”

It's almost a question; giving me the option not to feel obliged to answer, but I don’t want to leave him hanging and wondering. Maybe laying my cards out on the table wouldn’t be such a bad thing, before I get in too deep.

I lean on my elbows that rest on the table and angle myself towards him slightly. “Ok, just so you know where my head is at…” I shift slightly under his now intense stare, as he hangs on my words. “I like spending time with you, and even though we’ve only just met...I feel I’ve known you for a long time, which is rare for me, to have such a sudden connection. I find you insanely attractive that it’s hard to think straight when I’m around you.” He beams at that and a deep crimson glow burns his face. 

“We seem to have a lot in common and I’m definitely enjoying our time together and getting to know you. You have an air of mystery about you and to be honest, it just makes me more intrigued to find out more about you. Since I met you at the museum, you have been on my mind more than I was expecting and this…” I lift up our joined hands. “would have frightened me to the point of running and hiding, if it was with anyone but you.” I say, quite fast, the words leaving me in a rush, as the urgency of having to say them takes hold of me. 

I exhale and hesitantly meet his stare.

His boxy grin is wider than ever as his eyes sparkle with excitement. I find myself mirroring his smile.

“I’ve got to admit, I was not expecting that but a part of me was hoping you felt that way.” He beams. “When I’m with you, I feel like I can completely be myself, no personas, no hiding, just me. I’m not too experienced in matters of the heart and this is a first for me; feeling this way. You’re so beautiful that it’s distracting especially because I find you fascinating and I want to know every little thing about you. Every story, every thought, everything but when you talk or smile, I can’t help but want to kiss you.” He stops, leaving that last part hanging heavy in the air.

His tongue darts out to wet his lips while he watches me. My stomach tightens with anticipation, hoping he will, waiting for him to lean in and do it. I stare at his mouth, heart beating so hard that it’s all I can hear pounding in my ears. 

He leans forward until he’s just inches from my face, his scent swirling around me, his soft, plump lips inviting me, calling to me, when the screen doors to our booth open abruptly. 

Taehyung is back against his seat in a flash, his hand no longer touching me and I suddenly feel cold without his skin against mine. 

My head snaps up, only to be met with Yoshi’s grinning face.

“Hey guys, I hope you were happy with your meals?” He asked, eyes eager for approval, completely oblivious to the moment he just disturbed.

I slump back in my seat. “Perfect as always, Yoyo.” I smile, trying to hide the disappointment that swells inside me.

“Yes, it was amazing. I will definitely be returning before the end of my trip.” Taehyung says softly, offering a bow of his head.

Yoshi slaps him on the back, the action making Taehyung’s eyes pop with surprise and I muffle a laugh behind my hand.

“Thanks man, I really appreciate that. You’re welcome here anytime, just drop by and I'll make sure you’re taken care of.” 

Taehyung smiles and nods. “That’s very kind of you, thank you.” 

“Here’s your bill.” He places the little, leather book with the paper inside on the table. “Well, I’ll let you two love birds get back to your date, we have a ‘no fondling, foreplay or sexual activity’ rule here though, so be sure to take that outside if the mood strikes.” 

My icy glare burns into him as he grins and closes the doors before I can throw something at him. I hear his laughter and his footsteps as he leaves.

I look over at Taehyung who is fighting a laugh himself. 

“Don’t you start.” I warn, resisting the smile that twitches the corner of my mouth. 

He laughs out loud. “I love it when you scold me.”

I shake my head at him, feigning shock and unable to hide my amusement anymore. “You’re not supposed to enjoy it.”

He shrugs and gives me a bashful grin, then checks his phone and groans. “I really do have to go. I’m really sorry.” 

“Hey, don’t worry, it’s fine.” I grab my bag as he glances at the bill. 

“I’m getting this, no arguments.” He says sternly. I smirk at the authority in his tone, wondering if he’s that commanding in bed too. Mind out of the gutter.

He places his cash down with a very generous tip, that has my eyes practically bulging out of their sockets.

I grab my blazer and slide out of the booth. “Lets go.”

I lead the way over to Yoshi, who is busy entertaining the customers sitting around the counter where he cooks and chats away. I wave to get his attention.

“We’re off Yoshi!” I call out. 

He nods, drops everything and rushes around to us. He pulls me into a quick, tight hug and before he’s even let me go he’s reaching around to shake Taehyung’s hand. I squeeze out of his grip and return to Taehyung’s side.

“Nice to meet you, man.” Yoshi waves.

“You too, thank you again.” Taehyung replies.

“My pleasure. Call me later, doll.” He points gun fingers at me and waves as he returns to his station. 

We head to the doors, opening them to the heavy, night air; warmth swirling around me in a complete contrast to inside. I hear Yoshi’s voice behind me call out. “Use protection!”

I put my middle finger up behind me without even looking in his direction. His laugh bellows out before the doors shut behind us. God, I really hated him sometimes. 

We walk to the car that had arrived to pick up Taehyung, the driver waiting patiently behind the wheel. 

“Jump in and we’ll drop you off.” He said, opening the door for me. 

I slid in across the comfy, fabric seats. Taehyung spoke to the driver then climbed in next to me. I was surprised to see the black partition between us and the driver and the small, dark curtains covering all the windows. I’ve never seen a car with these before, how odd.

My thoughts are interrupted by his hand on mine, the heat from his soft skin, searing through me. I look over to find he’s watching me from the corner of his eye, he gives me a side smile and I thread my fingers through his.

“You know, Yoshi did say something before you came in…” He says into the quiet. 

My stomach drops, nervous with apprehension. “What?”

“He...mentioned your ex.”

I felt a small flare of anger course through me. How dare he speak to Taehyung about him. Why bring up my past with someone I might have a future with? I let out a long breath. “What did he say?”

Taehyung looks hesitant. “Not much, honestly. Just said you dated a real arsehole, who broke your heart in the worst way. Then you came in, he didn’t get to finish.”

Thank god. This was my business to talk about, not Yoshi’s. I nod slowly.

“I think...” Taehyung cuts in quickly, worrying he’s upset me. “I think he was warning me not to hurt you, that’s why he brought it up.”

That was probably the case but I’m still pissed off at him. “That does sound like Yoshi.” I reply, quietly.

“And while I would like to hear about your past, including past relationships, I will wait until you’re ready to talk.”

I nod again, mulling that over. “Tomorrow. I’ll tell you about it tomorrow, if you want to hear it.”

He squeezes my hand. “Only if you’re sure.”

I smile at him, my anger slowly extinguishing, not wanting to ruin the moment with Taehyung because of something Yoshi said.

“Do you get a lunch break at work?” He asks, randomly into the silence, breaking any tension left.

I nod and my brow furrows. “Yes, of course. Why do you ask?”

“I have a packed schedule tomorrow evening, so I cannot see you but I need to.” He hits me with that intense stare again. If I weren't already sitting, my knees would be trembling trying to hold me upright. “Are you free to meet me on your lunch break?” His pleading eyes melt my insides.

I feel heat race from my chest to my cheeks as my blush spreads. “For you? Of course.”

He smiles, genuine excitement in his eyes and he looks down at our joined hands. Sitting this close to him, arms and thighs almost touching, so close and yet, so far. The urge to shift closer to him is almost overwhelming but for some reason I resist. There’s an invisible current I can feel from his body to mine, almost electric, sending tingles through my body.

“Taehyung, we’re here.” A voice sounds out from a speaker somewhere making me jump and interrupting my thoughts. I realise then, the car has stopped, too focused on the sheer magnetism I could feel towards him.

“Come on, I’ll walk you to your door.” He climbs out, hand only leaving mine for a second before he’s grasping it again to gently pull me out the car. He leads me up the steps to my door and when I turn to him to say goodnight, we’re suddenly face to face, inches apart. 

My heart knocks rapidly against my ribcage, even as my lungs seem to stop working and my breath stills. His hand comes up to push the hair off my shoulder and I feel him linger on my neck. Warm, long fingers slide up to hold each side of my face, as he tilts his head and suddenly, before I can think, his lips are on mine. Gentle, soft and magical. 

My senses go crazy for a moment, overloaded with stimulation before I reciprocate eagerly. The taste of him like nothing I’ve ever experienced before, I want more. 

He pulls away suddenly, still close enough for me to feel his harsh breathing against my face. 

“Sorry, I should have asked first.” He says breathlessly.

My core is on fire, I feel ready to explode as I grab his light shirt by the collar and pull him against my lips again. My hands find their way to his neck, as I grip to keep him close to me and yet it’s not close enough. His hands wind around my waist holding me tight against his body. Heat and fire replace my thoughts, as I can only focus on my erratic heartbeat and the painful throbbing between my legs as his perfect, angular lips dance with mine. 

He breaks away to breath, sending a trial of kisses across my cheek to my ear.

“Until tomorrow.” He whispers breathlessly, before gently releasing me and taking a step back. He captures my hand, brings my fingers up to his lips, like he did that first night and places a gentle lingering kiss against them.Then he’s turning abruptly, dashing down the stairs and into the car. 

I stand there, dazed. Wow. Did that just happen? 

I fumble with my handbag, my head feeling fuzzy and unable to control the rest of my body.

I eventually find my keys and clumsily let myself in, walking through my apartment in a trance. I mechanically get ready for bed, my body on autopilot while I replay the kiss over and over in my mind, unable to think of anything else. As I lay in bed, my phone vibrates against the top of my nightstand, pulling me out of my Taehyung daydream.

Taehyung [22.30]: Made it back in time, no pumpkins here—

I laugh. Attached to the message is a close up photo of him laying down in bed, resting on an arm, his almost ebony eyes wearing a smile and staring straight through the phone into me. He looks gorgeous. Did I just kiss him? How on earth did that happen? 

My grin starts to hurt my cheeks but I can’t seem to stop it. I try to force it into just a regular smile, nothing too over the top or creepy, I fluff my hair out on the pillow and take a mirroring selfie, hitting send after.

Y/n [22.32]: Good to know, none here either 😊

Taehyung [22.33]: Haha! Good. I’ll let you get some rest, see you tomorrow lunch time. Goodnight! 😉

I reply, wishing him a goodnight in return, just before my eyelids finally start to droop. As I drift off to sleep I replay the images of his lips moulded on mine, my fingers in his hair and his warm hands on my face, hoping he will appear in my dreams tonight.

Thank you so much for reading, if you could leave me some feedback it would be much appreciate, even if it’s just a little comment to tell me what you thought 🖤

[blue-eyed-korra]

Yeah that comic I was spamming last night? Well I would have spammed more but unfortunately there isn’t a lot of content to spam. 

So I’ve decided to fix that and spread the word about it!

Anyways, Purple Hyacinth is a fantastic crime thriller comic by Ephemerys and Sophism that’s being published on Webtoon! Basically it’s about a cop and an assassin coming together to take down a crime syndicate that’s tortured the city for a decade. Why is it so good tho? Let me explain!

Our main character Lauren is this super capable badass cop who can somehow tell when people lie. She’s also got that whole tragic backstory that ties into the criminals she’s trying to take down. Lots of conflict with trying to serve justice vs seeking revenge and all that good stuff. She’s got these striking eyes that the guys she dates always bring up (much to her dismay).

The assassin (aka the Purple Hyacinth) is the most deadly assassin in the city, but he wants to take down the very organisation he works for for *reasons* (probably similar tragic backstory shit but we don’t know details yet). He got the name cause he’s known for leaving a purple Hyacinth at the scene of his crimes which, if you know anything about flowers and their significance, is interesting.

Also I need to take a second to talk about his design because he’s fucking gorgeous like??

This design??? Jesus. Well done guys

Obviously there’s a lot of sexual tension between them like... they’re either trying to kill each other or having light banter at any given point and it’s amazing. The whole dynamic is basically a ‘Reluctant partners working together/ Enemies to Lovers’ type situation which I positively LIVE for. Sprinkle in a bit of angst, drama and comedy and it’s pretty much everything you could ever want in a story.

What more could you ask for?

Intriguing plot with lots of mystery? Yes

Interesting setting/aesthetic? Yup

Leads with a ton of chemistry? Check

Fun and interesting side characters/relationships? Bingo

Music that plays with basically every chapter that fits the mood perfectly and yet is beautiful in its own right? Hell yeah

Is the music available on Spotify and Apple Music? Yes sir

Great comedic art and timing? Right you are

Sexual Tension?

Fuck yeah

If you’re interested please check it out on Webtoon’s website or on the app! As of right now there are 22 episodes up and updates are every Tuesday (9pm Monday EST).

Sorry for the rant but it’s been like a week since I’ve found this and I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it!

Hope you guys enjoy it!!!

[nouvelis]

#  CELLPHONE TOUR  /  PAK SEOJUNG — VII.

how many alarms they have set: fifteen, sometimes he gets up from the first one, sometimes he needs them all, boy’s a mess

their favourite app(s) to use: voice memos and notes, for when inspiration hits/diary entries when his thoughts are too loud, likes to practice his singing when he’s alone in the car too

their most used app(s): spotify and socials, he’s either on them A LOT ( which does not end well, either making a fool of himself by exposing his chaotic side or getting sad from criticisms ) or like right now, ignoring the whole world 

someone they have blocked: crazy fans who somehow found his number, sometimes uriel when he’s being annoying as hell, bandmates and manager too — maybe not, he doesn’t want death yet ( lies???? ). oh and his trash of a mother. honestly puts his phone to sleep mode a lot lol 

the last person they texted: uriel, who suspects seojung is planning some shenanigans behind his back. it’s true, he’s trying to organise a surprise birthday party for uriel but now he’s Stressed™ and wants to give up

soft headcanons: photos taken when uriel was on tour in the states and seojung showed up in to surprise him, spent a weekend in san francisco together being dumb tourists. if he could he’d use his pretty bf as his wallpaper, but since he can’t, he uses a pic uriel took of him and it’s a running joke among his bandmates how much he loves his face ( not a lie ). but it actually shows how uriel looks at him and serves as a reminder to try harder to keep himself together, so he can become someone who deserves to be loved this much (ノಥ,_｣ಥ)ノ彡┻━┻  SEOJUNG BEST BOI!!!

just cause i’m still ruined by this hc @synthes 

[adewild1-blog]

Just Another Indy Muso Trying To Break Even (Part 1)

I have been involved with the music business in one form or another from the late 70’s until the present day, purely as an Amateur or Hobbyist if you like.  Playing in numerous bands over the years as a guitarist/vocalist, and covering many genres of music.  I’ve also written my own music from about the age of 16, but I’d never seemed to be able to find the time to do anything with my original material, which had been piling up in my head over the years.  Fast forward to hell of 2020, which had put a stop to most of my musical activities, but allowed me to concentrate on what I’d hoped may be some sort of solo musical career.  With this in mind I decided to take a bunch of songs that I’d recorded over the past 18 months and put them on general release.

My debut solo album “Ghosts of my Past” was totally self-funded and was recorded solely at “Towpath Studios” in Sebastopol, South Wales by Mike Hopkins, who also Mixed and Mastered it, and with the help of my good friend and Bass Guitarist Wayne Morgan.  All songs were self-penned, most of them were written between the ages of 19 to 30, and were all inspired by my musical heroes The Beatles, Peter Frampton and Jimi Hendrix, to name but a few, hopefully I’ve done them justice.

This album went on general release on 13th June 2020.  It was done a bit hastily, I didn’t really put much thought into organising promotion etc. as Initially the idea was to promote the album through a series of gigs over the following year.  Obviously that idea was swamped by the Covid/Lockdown situation.  So I just wanted to get the album out.  I used a distribution company called “Distrokid” to do this, who for a fee, will handle the distribution of your musical releases to all of the major “Digital Streaming Platforms”, you know the culprits, “Spotify”, “iTunes”, “Amazon Music” etc. 

Continued in  “ Just Another Indy Muso Trying To Break Even (Part 2)”, coming soon!