#in other words thanks for keeping me sane around here !!
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somebluemelodies · 6 months ago
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currently going through the duality of fandom in which while one fandom i’m in (this one) is absolutely wonderful to me and i adore so many of the people i’ve met and want to hug them all, and with the other one (undisclosed for all intents and purposes), almost every ounce of joy and whimsy is met with 4-5 people whose walls i want to hide in and shake their shoulders begging them to be kinder (not to me, to other people)
like sure you’re allowed to dislike something, that’s your human-given right, but holy shit some people could stand to not be so mean😭
anywhomst’ve thanks for coming to my tiny tedtalk LOVE U GUYS <3
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carebearbussy · 9 months ago
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ᥫ᭡ thinking about heian era! sukuna having a heavy breeding kink, seemingly out of nowhere.
you bring up a mere idea at dinner, the conversation quickly turning normal, to you bringing up an idea he had never given a second thought to.
"do you ever want kids with me, 'kuna?"
you would ask him, innocently enough, a sickeningly sweet tone hidden beneath your words. but you would already know the answer to this question. he would look up at you, then back down at his food, annoyance pondering his mind. eating a slab of salmon sashimi, he took a bite, chewing slow enough to hint at his potential answer. placing down his chopsticks, he would look back up at you, scoffing to himself at your foolish inquiry.
"those small, annoying humans that require too much attention for their own good? no thank you, i have better things to attend to."
he says, focusing on the meal before him. but his thoughts soon get the best of him. and now that he thinks about it, he will need an heir eventually. and not only that, but what would you be like? as a mother specifically. you would require more attention than most of the time. which was something he secretly enjoyed indulging in, despite his negative reasoning towards infants. how would you look?
you would be more swollen than usual, you stomach would grow larger by day, your breasts will most definitely become more full by the day. the bigger picture, which was you, enticed him in a way. something about seeing you round with his child really had his head going.
and so thats how you ended up here, you knees tightly locked against your stomach, as sukuna absolutely plows into your already stuffed cunt.
this was the seventh time? eighth time? at this point, you couldn't keep track. but he had came wayyyy too many times more than an average man should be able to. it was excruciating, really, the whimpers leaving your mouth, his hands bringing your knees closer to your chest with every move of his hips.
his seed was leaking out of you, glop by glop, dripping down your bottom even more, as he kept going harder and rougher. splashes of your juices paired with his cum stained the bed, the squelching of your pussy becoming deafening with every smack of his heavy balls against the rim of your ass. and the tight grip he had on your locks wasn't helping his case.
"hah, you're gonna give your king his offspring? yeah? r' you gonna be a good little mother f'me? make me an heir?"
he asks, your head barely able to focus on anything other than trying to stay sane. you felt sooo full, but this apparently wasn't enough for sukuna, or his heavy urges to breed your sloppy cunt. you nod eagerly, not wanting him to go any harder than he already has. but with the way he kept abusing your womb, it seemed like you were enjoying it, as sukuna relishes in your facial expression, your eyes rolling back, your mouth hung open wide enough to stuff two of his free fingers in.
"you'd be such a good mother, so obedient too. you wanted to rile me up, didn't you? i'll give you what you want, woman."
moaning into his fingers, you swirl your tongue around his digits, making him hum contently. you try to focus your vision onto his eyes, but the way he pushed his chest further into yours, had you practically cross eyed. hitting a new angle, you felt yourself completely let go, officially adding onto your list of orgasms you had previously had that night.
he released his fingers from your mouth, a coat of your saliva stringing upon release. he ceases to pull out of you, instead letting himself nuzzle nicely into your warmth, releasing yet again inside of you, earning a whine of complaint on your behalf. he playfully slaps your cheek with his wet hand, trailing it down to your pussy, playing in the ring of his semen around his cock. you squirm slightly, as you watch him then bring his cum coated fingers up to your mouth, pushing them back inside your mouth, making you taste his seed, some of his cum pooling around your lips.
"does that taste good? i bet it does, since you seem to love my seed so much. i cant wait to see you so full, besides from right now, of course."
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miniseokminnies · 2 months ago
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the subtle art of stirring the pot —- l.sm
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⭑.ᐟ pairing: lee seokmin x fem!reader ⭑.ᐟ theme: coworkers to lovers, annoyances to lovers, sous chef!seokmin ⭑.ᐟ w/c: 9k ⭑.ᐟ warnings: 18+ MDNI, mentions of food, stressful work environment, insults, jealousy, switch!seokmin, switch!reader, semi public make outs, protected sex (that's a yes yes), marking, fingering, multiple orgasms, slight angst, miscommunications ⭑.ᐟ a/n: written as part of the Lonely Hearts Café collab put on by @camandemstudios - make sure to check out the full collab masterlist here send over some love! (haha get it) thanks a million to my lovely beta readers: @tomodachiii and @lovetaroandtaemin and a special shoutout to @seungkw1 for betaing and overall keeping me sane
Ring ring ring
The chaos of a kitchen is only aided by the sound of orders being put in.  Saturdays are statistically the busiest days of the week, and being a restaurant in New York City, Quartz and Serenity is no exception.  You had been frantically chopping carrots for the better part of an hour.  
“Y/N!” The head chef called out to you, “Go get more mushrooms, chicken, and sherry for me please.”  Without another word you jogged toward the walk in refrigerator to retrieve the ingredients.  The last few years you’ve spent in this kitchen has allowed you to map it all out to a science, which in a way it was.  You felt like a part of this well oiled machine and you handled the pressure with ease.  
You piled the ingredients in your arms and pushed out of the walk in.  You began to unpack the items on the counter next to the chef.  He instructed you to take them out of their packages and begin chopping them for him.  While the dinner service ran smoothly, there was an air of stress that always comes with being short staffed. You always pulled it off though, and tonight was no different.    
The moment you crossed from the hallway into your apartment, you dropped your bag to the floor and kicked off your shoes. You smelled like grease and sweat.  The apartment was bathed in the yellow light above your stove you left on this morning.  There were dishes in the sink and cook books stacked up around the kitchen.  
Sighing, you dragged yourself to the bathroom.  You dropped your chef’s coat into the laundry pile and waited for the water to get warm.  Once hot, the water ran over you, loosening your tight muscles.  You stood in the stall staring at the wall for several minutes, mind wandering to what ingredients you had in your refrigerator and whether or not you should just order something.  
The water sputtered and threatened to turn cold all too quickly.  You rushed through your routine, savoring the last few drops of warm water.  It went straight from warm to ice cold in seconds as you were rinsing your conditioner out of your hair.  
Clad in pajamas, you stared into the boiling water on the stove.  You dumped probably too much pasta into the water and turned to the other burner.  You mixed together ingredients in a pan over the fire to make a sauce. This was a typical meal for you after manning the kitchen at Quartz and Serenity because it was easy and not on the menu.  
No matter how much you enjoyed cooking, you always tended to get tired of the food that you worked around all day.  Customer complaints and repetitive pressure did that to you.  You wouldn’t change a thing though, this is what you loved.  
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“Everyone!” You heard the booming voice of the head chef call through the kitchen, “I have someone to introduce you to!” The staff and yourself meandered to the center of the kitchen where Chef Choi was standing with a man you didn’t recognize.  He was around your age, maybe a bit older.  His features were so striking, you almost missed the chef’s coat he was wearing.   
“This is Chef Lee,” your boss smiled, clapping the man on the back, “He is our new sous chef!” You didn’t hear anything he said after that, you felt like the walls were closing in on you.  You could feel eyes on you but you stared straight ahead.  You could feel your jaw tighten as you bored a hole into Chef Lee’s stupid head with your eyes.  
Once you were dismissed back to your stations to prepare for dinner service you saw him hovering near your station out of the corner of your eye.  
“Can I help you?” 
“Oh!” He smiled sheepishly.  “I just wanted to introduce myself to everyone individually! You can call me Seokmin.” “Okay, can I get back to what I need to do, Chef Lee?” You looked back to your knife.  
“Uh, sure…what is your name first?”
“Y/N.” You gestured to the nametag pinned to your coat.  He nodded and wandered away towards the wait staff.  You rolled your eyes.  
Throughout the night you were tasked with showing your new coworker the way things run at Quartz and Serenity and much to your displeasure, he was very excited to be there.  Every so often he gave you room to breathe by floating around the kitchen, observing everything.  However, everytime he returned to your side you thought you might punch him.  
Somehow you made it through the dinner service.  It wasn’t your turn to clean up the kitchen tonight so you bolted to the bus station as fast as possible.  You didn’t say goodbye to anyone, knowing that you might get sucked into doing something with your coworkers.  
Once on the bus you check your class schedule on your phone, only to realize with horror that you have a test tomorrow.  Your stomach turned with the dread of having to be up all night studying, again.  
—-
“Need any help with anything?” Seokmin’s sickly sweet voice offered at your side.  
“No.” You were already on edge today, you made it through your test by the skin of your teeth and your professor made that abundantly clear.  You had no time, or patience, for him right now.  
“I saw you prep yesterday, I could do part of that for you,” he pushed.  
“No thank you, Chef Lee.” You asserted through gritted teeth.  “I would ask Chef Choi if I were you.” He slinked away like a kicked puppy while you continued chopping vegetables.  It’s not your fault that he is completely out of his element and didn’t know what he was doing.  
However, when orders came pouring in you noticed that his confidence seemed to double from last night.  He was able to keep up with different elements, even without knowing the recipes very well yet.  
The kitchen was louder than it had been in months, the new addition to your team taking it upon himself to fill the room with music, from his own mouth, to your dismay.  You weren’t sure how much of his relentless optimism you could take, especially today.  He floated around the kitchen with a carelessness that you would never be able to comprehend.  
To your horror, at the end of the night Chef Choi announced that tonight was the most efficient night the restaurant has had in several weeks.  
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“You’re singing.” You deadpanned without looking up from the vegetables on your cutting board.  
“Y/NNNNN” Seokmin mused, “How was your dayyy?”
“Don’t ask me how I’ve been.” You forced your knife through a carrot, “Just do your job, and stop singing.” There were exactly three seconds of silence before Seokmin moved from singing to humming.  You slammed your knife down onto the cutting board.  “I’m taking a five!” You huffed and turned toward the walk-in. Seokmin stopped humming.  
The tears started as soon as the door closed behind you. Your back slid down the wall, the coldness biting through your clothes.  It was stupid to cry, but you couldn’t help it; he was so infuriating.  You had no idea what Chef Choi saw in him.  The tears sliding down your cheeks smudged the swipe of mascara you put on this morning? Yesterday? Couldn’t have been more than two days ago…
The door opened. 
“So, what’s up?” Seokmin asked softly, leaning against the wall next to you.
“Oh my god!” You cried, “Can’t you leave me alone for a single second?”        
“I did,” he blinked at you, “If I had it my way, I would’ve followed right away.”
“I’m in here because of you!” Your voice cracked, a new bout of tears threatening to spill, “I would have loved it if you didn’t come in at all!” 
“Well….technically, I’m…kind of your boss.”
“God, ew, no not really,” you scrunched your face in a look of disgust, “Chef Choi is our boss.” 
“Y/N, what did I ever do to you?”
“The kitchen ran smoothly without you!” You informed him, “Everything was fine without you!” 
“Now wait a minute,” there was an edge to his voice that you had never heard before, “I have never messed anything up.” 
“Well–” 
“No,” he cut you off, “Seriously, you may not like how I operate, that’s fine, but you aren’t going to sit here and tell me that I’m a problem in this kitchen.”  His words were firm but it was hard to miss the tears swelling in his eyes. 
“This is serious to me.” You hardened your gaze.  
“And it isn’t to me?”   
“Doesn’t seem like it.” 
“God,” He sighed.  “Y/N, maybe this can be a lesson for you.  No one is ever going to do things exactly as you expect them to.  That doesn’t mean they’re wrong.” He stood up to leave.
“You can’t just walk away after you talked down to me!” You shot to your feet. “You think I’m some dumb kid!” He turned to look at you, you chose to ignore the glimmer of a tear on his cheek. “I’m at the top of my class! I know what I’m doing!” 
“What are you trying to prove?” His voice rose now too, “I never said you didn’t know what you were doing! Do you want me to?” You blinked at him.  “You couldn’t even julienne the carrots today! Why? All because I was singing?”  He wiped the tear away from his skin angrily.  He moved toward you and crowded you against the wall.  The proximity forced you to look up at him, his face was stone.  “What’s your problem with me, Y/N?” He whispered, looking down his nose at you.  The cold of the refrigerator made the warm breath fanning across your cheeks even harder to ignore.
“We have a kitchen to get back to…” You tried to avoid looking at his lips.   
“You don’t think I’m serious about this,” he planted his hand on the wall next to your head, “So does it matter if I get back to that kitchen?” 
“You said I didn’t know what I’m doing! So I guess the kitchen doesn’t need either of us at this point!” You jutted your chin up defiantly.  He chuckled sarcastically.  
“You’re being so ridiculous right now, are you like this with every new hire?”   
“No, only the ones I find irritating,” and incredibly attractive, your thoughts wandered.  Rookie mistake, your eyes flit to his lips before you had time to think.  When your eyes returned to his he was looking at you, absolutely bewildered.  Then, in one swift motion he smashed his lips to yours.  The way he kissed you was just as angry as the way he was talking to you moments ago; his lips moved with a fervor that was almost malicious.  
Your fingers found the front of his chef’s coat, you attempted to pull him closer.  He whined into your mouth at the feeling of being wanted.  The sound awakened something in you and heat settled in your stomach.  You shifted your weight trying to ignore it.  Seokmin nudged you with his knee until you parted your legs slightly for him to slot his thigh between.  He was firm and muscular pressed against your core and it took everything in you to not rock against it.  
With a jolt you remembered where you were and who you were with.  You pushed against his chest until he moved away from you.  Eyes wide and cheeks flushed, Seokmin seemed as though he realized the same thing.  
“Come out when you're ready,” he nodded and left the walk-in without looking back.  You tightened your ponytail and took a deep breath before following him out.  You returned to your station and picked up the knife you abandoned before the ordeal.  “Thin as matchsticks, Y/N.” Seokmin reminded you through kiss-bruised lips.   
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“Table 13 sends its compliments to the chef!” Soonyoung comes barreling into the kitchen carrying plates to deposit into the wash.  
“That was the last table right?” Seokmin breathed a sigh of relief.  
“Yup!” Soonyoung popped the “P” and punctuated the exclamation by dumping the dishes he was carrying into the sink.  You had the day off and Seokmin felt the pressure of your absence throughout the entire day.  
The encounter he had with you was heavy on his mind all day, the first day he’s spent in this kitchen without you by his side.  He still couldn’t figure out what it was that he could have possibly done to you in the short time you’ve worked together.  
“Hey Soonyoung?” He called without thinking.  Soonyoung turned to him with a questioning look on his face.  “You’ve been here a while right?” “Yeah, why?” Soonyoung reached around Seokmin and grabbed at the carrots, earning him a slap on the hand.  He winced and pulled his hand to his chest.  
“Can you think of any reason Y/N would dislike me?” 
“Hm? Y/N?” Soonyoung mumbled, “Oh! The scary one.  Yeah I try not to talk to her much.” 
“Because she scares you?” “Because she scares me.” Soonyoung nodded.  
“She wanted your job.” One of the waitresses, Jeongyeon, asserted from the doorway.  Seokmin switched his attention to her, almost begging her to clarify.  She sighed and adjusted her bag on her shoulder.  “She’s about to graduate, the position was vacant for so long that she was under the impression that Chef Choi had decided to hold it for her.” Seokmin moved across the kitchen to beg her to tell him everything.  
“Why would she assume that?” He pleaded.  
“You have no idea how long your position was vacant, do you?” She turned to leave, “She was acting as unofficial sous chef for almost a year.  In her opinion there’s no reason she shouldn’t have your job by now, diploma or not.”  He looked down at the floor. "Oh, and stop looking at her with those puppy dog eyes, she'll chop your fingers off."
Eventually, Seokmin dragged himself home.  His apartment felt too big, too empty.  He wished he could stop thinking about you, if he was honest.  He stared into his pantry and quickly decided he had no desire to actually cook.  He popped an instant ramen into the microwave and went to go change his clothes.  
The microwave was beeping four minutes later, he pulled the cup out and narrowly avoided burning his hand on the outside.  He set the ramen on the counter and dug through the refrigerator in search of something to drink.  There was not a lot to be found, besides a full pack of wine coolers he bought weeks ago in hopes he could invite some people from work over to celebrate working together, clearly that never happened.  
About two hours later, Seokmin was crying to the credits of Dear Evan Hansen with five empty wine coolers on his coffee table and a sixth to his lips.  Whether he was crying over the movie or something else entirely, he wasn’t sure.  
He still couldn’t stop his mind from wandering to you, he had new information to mull over, but he still couldn’t understand why you hated him.  He would’ve talked it over with you if you just came to him with the issue instead of giving him the silent treatment.  Even worse, he couldn’t stop thinking about the feeling of your lips on his.  
Your lips and the warmth of your body against his had been running through his mind since it happened.  He continued to sip from the bottle as he thought about you.  He admired you in a way, so headstrong and willing to go after what you wanted, even if that got him yelled at.  He didn’t really care, he realized you were pretty even when you were insulting him.  
Soon the bottle was empty and Seokmin’s eyes were closed thinking about your mouth.  He knew he would never live it down if you knew, but that didn’t stop him from delivering the soft initial touches over his shorts.  Eventually pulling them down, letting his semi hard cock spring free, and pumping himself until he was stiff.  
His voice surprised him, sounding foreign to his ears, whispering your name to his empty apartment. Everything became muffled as he heard the blood rushing in his ears, he felt his own hips sputter and he picked up his pace, fucking up into his hand.  He thought about the pretty way you said his name with an edge to your voice and he was quickly undone.       
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You pushed the french fries around in the basket, the parchment paper soaking up the grease they left behind.  You barely got three bites into your burger before you felt sick again and resorted to just pretending to eat.  Maybe an entire bottle of wine to yourself last night and sleeping until 1 pm was not your best idea, but desperate times call for desperate measures.  
You checked the time, you have to be at work in a little over an hour, and you knew you had to eat something for your stomach to stop swirling.  You sighed and picked up the burger again, and took a bite.  Your body tried to protest but eventually you felt your stomach calming, thankful to have food.  You laid your head back onto the back of the booth and closed your eyes for a moment, taking deep breaths.  
“Rough night?” You cracked an eye open to see Seokmin standing over you, a basket matching yours in hand.  “Me too,” he lifted his basket in a gesture of comradery.  “May I sit?” You nodded, not having the energy to argue with him over it.  You sat up and studied his face briefly.  He had bags under his eyes like you, his hair was more askew than normal, and he was wearing the biggest hoodie you had ever seen.  
“What got you so hung up?” You asked, selecting another fry from your basket.  
“Oh,” he didn’t look at you, “I just have a lot on my mind, you?”
“You.” His eyes snapped to you, clearly surprised by your boldness.  
“What?” He sputtered around a mouthful of his burger.  
“I’m sure this isn’t the first time you’ve annoyed someone to the point of drowning in alcohol.” 
“I mean, maybe,” he dropped the burger into the basket, “but no one has ever been so bold as to tell me outright…” 
“Are you pouting right now?” Seokmin crossed his arms over his chest at your words, once again refusing to look at you.  “See!” You scoff, “this is what I mean, you get everything you want and when someone calls you out on your bullshit you can’t handle it!” You pushed your food away from you with a huff.  
“I get everything I want?” He raised an eyebrow at you.  “You know I graduated from culinary school, just like you’re about to?” He leaned his elbows on the table, getting closer to you.  “I worked hard to get where I am, and I was hired because I come highly complimented from previous bosses.” 
“What is this? Your resume?” 
“Let me show you, come to dinner with me on Thursday, we both have the day off” 
“So you can brag?”
“No,” he cracked a smile. “So we can get to know each other better, and maybe put this behind us.”
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You stared up at the facade of the restaurant.  This building had been your dream for years, since you moved to the city.  Now, because of Seokmin, you were able to dine here? It almost doesn't seem fair. 
“Hey!” Seokmin’s voice pulled you out of your thoughts. “Sorry I’m late; I hope you weren’t waiting long!” You turned to him and shook your head.  “Oh good, shall we?” He ushered you inside, lightly touching the small of your back.  You tried to ignore the feeling in your stomach at the small gesture.   
Once inside, he let his hand drop but stayed close to you.  He leaned around you to speak to the man at the host stand.  “Table for two, the name Lee should be on your list?” The man flipped through a few sheets of paper before stopping to read through a short list of names. Seokmin’s hand returned to your back, pushing you to follow the man through the restaurant.  
The decor was almost enough to distract you from the warmth of Seokmin spreading through your body as he pressed his hand against you more firmly.  The ornate light fixtures bathed the room in a soft light, making everything feel more dreamlike and romantic.  
Seokmin pulled out your chair for you as the host was informing the two of you that a waiter would be with you soon.  As Seokmin took his seat, you had a moment to take him in.  You had never seen him wearing anything besides his chef’s coat.  He had the sleeves of his collared shirt rolled up, showing off his watch and his toned arms.  
“See anything you like?” 
“What?” Your eyes widened, and a blush creeped up your cheeks.  He pushes a menu towards you.  
“Anything?” He smiles, choosing not to bring attention to your obvious staring.  You shoved your face into the menu and began to study it intently.   After a few minutes of silence the waiter provided glasses of water and a promise to return in a few minutes to take your orders.  You laid your menu flat on the table and looked up at Seokmin.  
“What do you like?” You asked sheepishly.  He chuckled to himself and set his menu down.  
“Well,” he pointed at the wine selection, “I was going to order us wine. Do you like white or red?” 
“White, usually,” 
“Okay, so,” he looked at you over his glasses, “you know enough about wine pairings to know what dishes a white wine rules out.” You nodded. “They have a lovely creamy pumpkin penne dish that pairs nicely with chardonnay, and we could share a brie sampler for an appetizer?”  
“Honestly, that sounds wonderful,” you smile at him. You let him order everything for the two of you.  He lets the silence linger for a few minutes while you wait for your wine.  Once the glasses are poured, and he’s confident no one will bother you for a while, he breaks the silence he crafted.  
“You’re much more shy outside of the kitchen,” he observed.  
“I’m out of my depth,” you admitted quietly.  He raised an eyebrow and took a sip of his wine, inviting you to go on.  “I’ve been waiting to eat here since I moved to New York, and you just happen to have your name permanently on the list?”  
“I know the chef,” he muttered into his wine.  
“I know how highly qualified you are,” you informed him, “you’re experienced out of the ears and I’m just some kid in culinary school.” 
“Well,” he tipped his glass forward to clink it with yours, “you can legally drink, so you’re not a kid.” He watched you smile, “And for what it’s worth, I think you’re really talented.” 
“Oh don’t say stuff like that to me,” you rolled your eyes and picked up your wine glass, “You might get me to come around to you.”
“Oh God forbid, we can’t have that.”
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“Where’s Y/N?” Seokmin was frantically moving through the kitchen.  “Dinner service starts in 40 minutes, why aren’t any of you telling me where Y/N is?” 
“She’s in the dining room, damn…” 
Seokmin knew that you closed the restaurant last night, opened this morning, and the two of you were closing together tonight.  So, when he found you asleep in a booth in the dining room, he wasn’t surprised.  You often used the few hours Quartz and Serenity was closed between breakfast and dinner to catch up on studying.  
Your head was resting on your arms, your ponytail was loose and strands of hair were falling in your face.  He reached to brush them away from your eyes but stopped short when he read the papers under your hand.  Application for Employment. He read it over and over with his hand hovering above your head.  He felt his stomach drop so fast he was afraid it would fall out of his ass.  
Taking a deep breath he let his hand settle on top of your head. He rubbed your hair softly with his thumb for a few moments, hoping that you would wake up.  When you didn’t stir, he moved his hand to your shoulder and shook you lightly.  
“Y/N,” he leaned closer to you.  Your eyes opened slowly.  “Hey,” he smiled, “dinner service starts in 30. I would let you sleep, but we need the table.” You jolted upright at his words, knocking his hand back to his side.  
“In 30?!” You began to shuffle your papers back into the folder and snapped your book closed, “why didn’t anyone grab me sooner?”  Seokmin didn’t have time to answer before you were breezing past him toward the kitchen.  He watched you until you disappeared into the back room, agonizing over what he would do if you actually left Quartz and Serenity.  
The entire dinner service was spent the same way, Seokmin becoming flustered when you assisted him.  If he was being honest with himself, he would be impressed with how easily you were able to bounce back to routine.  It was almost as if the hiccup from before didn’t even happen. 
You moved through this kitchen like you’ve been in it your entire life, Seokmin truly could not imagine this place without you.  He didn’t want to think about the fact that he didn’t want this kitchen to run without you.  But you deserved to run a restaurant in his opinion.  He wanted you to call the shots and to be successful, even if that meant he and Chef Choi would be competing against you after your graduation.  Then it hit him; he also wanted to be selfish and hide you away for himself.  
“Can’t you move any faster?” You shoved a soapy dish towards Seokmin.  The two of you were the only people left in the building after a successful Sunday.  You were eager to get home and sleep after the worst lineup of shifts.  You picked up a shift from a coworker because you desperately needed the money, but you didn’t think ahead to how your bones would ache after it all.  
“If you would rinse the soap off I could,” he sighed.  He pulled the faucet head toward the dish in your hand, spraying you lightly with the water.  
“Seokmin!” You squealed in annoyance. Grabbing the faucet back from him, you angled it towards him.  The water rolled off his exposed forearms, his coat sleeves long pushed up over his elbows.  He raised an eyebrow at you, almost like a challenge.   He plunged his hands into the sink filled with soapy water and splashed it up onto your coat. 
It wasn’t like you to sink to his level. Any other day, you would put a stop to this, get the dishes done, and go straight home.  However, you’re not stupid and didn’t miss a single look in your direction through the entire day.  Seokmin looked at you like a lovesick puppy everytime.  Something about those looks lit a fire in your belly, and you didn’t care to find out if it was anger or interest. 
So, you followed suit. You cupped your hands around a gaggle of bubbles, lifted it high above your head and smoothed the soap into his dark hair.  He stood motionless for a moment, looking down at you in disbelief as his hair dripped onto the floor.  Finally, he swiped his hands through his wet hair, slicking it back and exposing his forehead.  Somehow it seemed like his features became more sharp and striking with his hair pushed away.  Your eyes followed the sharp slope of his nose down to his lips and back to his dark eyes.  
He moved toward you quietly.  The tension hung thick in the air. He cupped your jaw with his wet hands, eventually moving to thread suds through your ponytail.  Any part of him that thought he might kiss you was dampened by the water you suddenly hurled out of the sink at that exact moment.  He yelped and moved away from you. 
“We have dishes to finish, Chef Lee.” You smirked.  The dishes in question were finished and dried in complete silence.  The water and the clattering of the glass were the only sounds in the room.  
“Let me take you home,” Seokmin broke the silence.  
“What?” You gaped at him.  
“No…” A blush creeped up his neck, “not like that.  You take the bus, right?” You nodded at him.  “You’re all wet, just let me drive you to your place.” 
“You don’t have to do that…” 
“I know,” he smiled sheepishly, “but I want to, please?” 
Somehow, he convinced you.  You were panicked, too panicked to even make fun of him for being the kind of person who lived in New York City and owned a car.  He passed his phone over to you and instructed you to put your address into the maps app.
The ride was silent, your leg bounced as you watched the location get closer and closer. You nearly threw yourself out of the car when he parked in front of the building.  
“Bye! See you Tuesday!” You blurted as you ran towards the lobby of the building.  Seokmin waved, confused, at the back of your head. 
“You need to stop telling people you live here.” The front desk attendant deadpanned.  
“I know, Jane,” you ducked to spy out the window.  
“Who is it this time? Bad date?” Jane was used to you showing up in her lobby every few weeks at this point.  You were lucky that she loved to gossip or else she would have banned you from the building months ago. 
“Ugh, no,” you watched Seokmin’s car pull away from the curb, “My coworker.”
“Why do you care if your coworker knows where you live?” 
“Honestly?” You stood up and moved toward her desk, “I’m not sure…”
“Hm,” she holds out a lollipop to you, “might want to unpack that.” 
“Yeah, yeah,” you unwrap the candy and pop it into your mouth, “whatever.” You exit the building with a wave and begin the short walk to your actual apartment.       
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“Red wine this time.” Seokmin declared as you slid into your chair.  
“Feeling bold today are we?” 
“Well,” he chuckled, “It’s a steakhouse, so we have to pair correctly!” This was the second installment of what Seokmin had started calling Seokmin's Surely Spectacular Suggestions .  You were starting to realize that he knows a lot more than you thought he did.  He always seemed to know someone at every restaurant, if not multiple people.   
“Oh my god!” A woman’s voice pulled you from your thoughts.  You looked up and the waitress was smiling at Seokmin. “It is so nice to see you!” 
“Oh!” Seokmin smiled widely at her, “I didn’t think you worked on Thursdays!” 
“Ugh!” She put her hand on her hip, “I don’t usually! Dosie needed the day off and as a good friend I took the shift.” She laughed and rolled her eyes.  You watched Seokmin’s face contort into a laugh.  Something panged in your chest watching them laugh together.  Suddenly, you were extremely interested in the menu in front of you as you tried not to think about what that could possibly mean.  Seokmin and the waitress chatted for several more minutes before she bounced away.  She never looked in your direction the entire time she was at the table.  
“Ordered us wine, hope that’s okay.” Seokmin knocked on the table in front of you to get your attention.  You hummed affirmatively. “What’s wrong? Have you decided you hate me again?”
“No,” You didn’t look at him.  You felt him stare at you from across the table, you held strong and did not look up from the menu.  It didn’t matter that you had read the words 8 oz wagyu beef steak and garlic potatoes six times, you couldn’t look at him.
The same waitress from earlier came back with your wine and a basket of bread. She placed everything down on the table and turned to Seokmin again.  
“Are you ready to order?” She smiled.  
“No, we need a few minutes.” You snapped before you had time to stop yourself. Seokmin shifted his gaze to you.  
“Oh, uh…okay.” The waitress blinked at you and turned on her heel without a second look.  
“What was that?” Seokmin was looking at you like you had grown a second head at some point in the last thirty seconds.  
“Nothing, she was pushy.” You shrugged, feigning nonchalance.  
“No she wasn’t.”
“She was!” You finally looked at him, he looked like a confused puppy, “You just didn’t see it because she was flirting with you.”   
“What are you talking abo–” His face contorted into a smirk, “Are you jealous?” He dropped his voice to a whisper.
“I’m going to the bathroom.” You declared, pushing out of your chair.  You all but stomped all the way to the bathroom, mentally cursing yourself for being jealous in the first place. A hand encircled your wrist as you turned the corner to the hallway that housed the bathrooms.  You turned to find Seokmin latched on to you.  He pulled you into the bathroom and locked the door behind you.  Looking him up and down he looked almost as shocked at his own actions as you felt.   
“Were you jealous?” He whispered, “I have to know, because if you don’t tell me it’ll eat me alive for the rest of my life.” You couldn’t help but think he was being just a little dramatic. You slotted your hand into the hair on the back of his head and pulled his lips to yours anyway.  
It took him a few moments to respond properly.  When his brain caught up to what was happening he kissed you back hungrily.  His lips moved roughly and he wrapped his arms around your waist. He pulled you as close as possible and swiped his tongue along your bottom lip.  You deepened the kiss and allowed him to explore further with his tongue.  
Seokmin had a way of putting every emotion he was feeling into his actions, it was evident when he kissed you angrily weeks ago, and it was evident now.  It felt like weeks of anger and bickering had melted off the two of you and now what was left was want and attraction that was left unsaid.  
He detached himself from your mouth and moved to kiss over your pulse point.  You squeezed your eyes shut and threw your head back to give him better access.  Experimentally, he sucked gently on the skin below your ear, earning him a quiet moan.  He did it again. 
“Let’s go home,” he panted into your skin. “Please.”  
“Seokmin we’ve only had wine,” you whispered  
“I’ll make you pizza at home, I don’t care, I just need you.” He whined.  
—-
Seokmin fumbled with the key to his apartment, his thoughts were elsewhere at the moment.  Finally, he unlocked the door and ushered you inside.  You tried not to think about the fact that his apartment was about double the size of yours.  He kissed you again once he had the door locked and you both inside.  His hands found your hips and he pulled you closer as he was licking into your mouth.  He tasted like wine, the same one you knew was on your lips as well.  
“You owe me pizza, Chef Lee..” You whispered, breaking away from his desperate mouth. 
“Oh my god, Y/N,” he groaned, “I can make pizza with my eyes closed.” His confidence was attractive, it was rare for him to be cocky like that.  
“You didn’t buy me dinner, and I’m a lady.” He scoffed and rolled his eyes before grabbing and lifting you up, forcing you to wrap your legs around his trim waist.  You yelped in surprise, you had no idea he could do that.  He plopped you down on the kitchen island and moved to the other countertop.  You watched as he rolled out pizza dough.  His arm muscles bulged as he put in effort to flatten it.  “Not even homemade dough?” You teased, “Some chef!” 
He sent you a glare out of the corner of his eye, but the blush creeping up his neck gave him away.  Suddenly it clicked, “oh my god, do you get turned on when I’m mean to you?” You smirked.  
“Shut up…” Seokmin muttered while opening the pizza sauce.  
“Well…better hurry that prep…” You smiled wickedly, spreading your legs.  Seokmin glanced over at you and nearly moaned at the sight of your panties under your dress.  He frantically pressed the buttons to preheat the oven.  Once the pizzas were ready to be put in the oven he slotted himself between your legs and captured your lips once more.  
You guided his hand to your breast and encouraged him to squeeze.  He placed his other hand on your exposed thigh.  He trailed his fingers slowly up and up towards your center until the oven beeped.  He groaned and ran over to place the pans in the oven and set the timer. 
“Take your pants off.” You stated simply when he turned back to you.  He nodded and stumbled out of his jeans, the thin fabric of his briefs left little to the imagination as he was hard by this point.  He moved toward you and you ran a hand over his clothed cock, he hissed at the contact.  
“One second,” He blurted before disappearing down the hall.  You contemplated touching yourself while he was gone, but he returned in a rush before you had the chance.  He wiggled a small foil package in his fingers to show you why he left.  
“Who said you could hit?” 
“I–well I just figured…”
“I was about to start without you just now, I could still do that.” You could tell that Seokmin was weighing his options, knowing it would be so hot to see you get yourself off, but needing the feeling of being inside you.  
“No, no!” He sputtered, “I got you!” You grabbed his wrist and moved his hand to your clothed cunt.  
“Prove it.” 
He started slowly, the pads of his fingers circling your clit through your panties. His lips attached to the sensitive skin below your ear.  He kissed the skin slowly, letting his teeth graze your neck every so often.  He hooked his thumbs under your underwear and pulled them off gingerly, letting them flutter to the floor.  
He ran his fingers through your folds, savoring the wetness there just for him.  Experimentally he slipped a finger inside, earning him an arch of your back and a sound so delicious it could be the only thing he heard for the rest of his life and he would be happy.  
“C’mere,” he grunted, his voice deeper than you had ever heard it.  He moved you to the edge of the counter and inserted a second finger.  You couldn’t help but rock your hips against his ruminations.  He reached that delicious spot inside of you and you felt yourself hurtling off the cliff.  “You talk a big game, but you’re so desperate for me.” Seokmin snaked his free hand over his cock, teasing himself as he finger fucked you into an orgasm.  
Once you came back to Earth he slowly removed his fingers.  Before he had the chance to wash them off, you took his hand and guided his fingers into your mouth.  He watched with wonder as your tongue swirled around his digits, cleaning them.  You pulled them out, a string of saliva connecting you to him.  
“Who’s desperate now?” You breathed watching him continue to tease himself over his briefs.  
“Can I please fuck you?” He whined.  You helped him out of his briefs, you watched his cock spring free, the tip red and angry.  You leaned down and thumbed his leaking slit, earning you a delicious moan.  You spread the mess down his shaft.  
He opened the condom with his teeth, you watched as he rolled it down.  He pulled you to the edge of the counter again and lined himself up with your entrance.  He pushed himself inside of you slowly, allowing you time to adjust.  The stretch was delicious.  He slowly began to thrust, whining in the process.  
“You’re so warm,” he cried.  You felt every inch of him as he slid in and out of you. His hands anchored you to the countertop as you draped your arms across his back.  Seokmin found his rhythm once you wrapped your legs around his waist, he felt so surrounded by you.  He swore he could live with you wrapped around him for the rest of his life.  
“Why didn’t you fuck me in the restaurant?” You breathed.  His hips stuttered for a moment.  
“In public?” He bit his lip.  
“Yeah?” You swiped a hand through his hair and gave it a tug.  He moaned into the crook of your neck.  
“I uh-” He whined, “I didn’t think-I don’t know?” “Oh you really can’t think when your dick’s busy, huh?”  He whined into your neck again, the vibrations and the warm air fanning against your skin left goosebumps behind. Seokmin’s hands trailed down from your hips to your thighs and he began to knead your soft skin with his nimble fingers.  
You leaned your head back, enjoying the feeling of him all over you, inside of you.  With better access to you he experimentally captured your skin between his teeth.  Your sounds spurred him on and encouraged him to begin sucking and biting a bruise into your skin.  With this your hips bucked up to meet his thrusts.  
The idea of being marked by Seokmin would have appalled you just a few weeks ago, but now you couldn’t bring yourself to hate the idea of people knowing you have had him like this.  Like that stupid waitress.  “She wanted you.” You muttered between moans.  
“What?” Seokmin breathed into your skin.  
“That waitress, she wanted you.” 
“Oh well.” Seokmin bit you again.  He was marking you, even after you told him that another woman wanted him like this.  The coil in your stomach threatened to snap at that alone.  You could envision yourself falling off the edge soon.  Seokmin was still massaging the underside of your thighs, pinning your legs around his waist.  Suddenly everything was overwhelming, everything was him.  You felt like fireworks were setting off inside you.  He continued rolling his hips into you through your orgasm.  Shortly after he was releasing into the condom, moans rattled your throat the entire time.
He pulled back to look at you, his eyelids were heavy over his eyes, his lips puffy.  Before either of you had the chance to say anything the oven beeped.  Seokmin’s eyes grew wide, both of you obviously forgot about the pizza.  
“Get your dick out of me and turn that off!” You laughed.  He nodded and slowly pulled out of you.  You watched him slap the off button on the oven, trying not to laugh at him being naked from the waist down.  
Once both of you were cleaned up and clothed, Seokmin cut the pizza and put it on plates.  You were waiting on his couch, dressed head to toe in his clothes.  To him you looked like a dream.  
“Stay the night.” He handed you your plate and sat down next to you.  
“No.” You stated simply, picking up a piece of pizza.  After several seconds of silence you looked up at him, he was looking at you dumbfounded.  “We have work tomorrow.” 
“I’ll drive you!” 
“And walk past Jeongyeon after showing up with you and smelling like sex? No thanks.” 
“You can shower here, I’ll even walk in ten minutes later, please?” He looked like a puppy again.  
“I don’t have my work clothes, and no yours won’t fit me.” You gestured towards his clothes that were far too big on you.  
“There’s extras, you know that.” 
“Fine…” You wouldn’t mind showering in a nice apartment for a change. “You walk in fifteen minutes after me, and you shower with me.” “You have a deal!”               
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Finals week was upon you.  The only week out of the year that work came second to school, you were so close to graduation you just had to make it through a week of practical exams.  You were confident in your ability to pass but your mind was elsewhere most of the time.  
You wondered how the kitchen was fairing without you, how Seokmin was doing without you.  As much as you hated to admit it, he did know what he was doing, but being absent was eating at you.  You flipped through the pages of your textbook without reading a single word wishing you could pick up your phone and hear about the days you’ve missed.  
Across town Seokmin was doing just about as well, he knew your name wasn’t on the schedule and he was dying to know where you were.  He was chopping carrots to have for dinner service when he decided to go straight to your apartment tonight.  He didn’t care if he had to get on his knees and beg the woman at the desk to tell him your apartment number.  
He all but sprinted out to his car once the kitchen was clean for the following day.  He parked on the curb in front of the building after the short drive.  He practiced what he was going to say to the woman at the desk on his way into the lobby.  He took a deep breath and approached her.  
“Can I help you?” 
“I’m looking for Y/F/N Y/L/N!” He blurted.  “She hasn’t been to work in a few days, she isn’t scheduled but she didn’t tell me she wouldn’t be here and I wanted to make sure I didn’t do anything wrong and I–” The woman was laughing.  Sure he went off script, but how would she know? He looked at her, confused.  
“She doesn’t live here.” Now he wasn’t expecting that.  
“What?” 
“I told her this would happen eventually, somebody would come looking for her and I would have to be the one to break it to them.” She sighed.  
“She just…lies to people?” 
“Yeah all the time.” She began digging in her desk for something.  “You said you worked with her?” “Yeah, I dropped her off here after work once…so I just thought..” Seokmin rubbed the back of his neck with his hand.  
“Oh you’re the one she was weird about!” “What?” “What? Nothing.” She began scribbling something on a slip of paper. “Here, this is her address, tell her Jane sent you.”  She handed him the paper and two lollipops.  
—-
A cautious knock rang through your apartment, which was confusing considering no one knew where you lived.  You unfolded yourself from the couch and padded to the door.  Seokmin was standing in the hallway and you almost slammed the door in his face.  
“What are you doing here?” You almost shrieked.  He held up two lollipops silently.  “Fuck, okay, uh…come in.” You stepped to the side allowing him entrance.  He shuffled past you, seeing another person standing in your tiny apartment was odd to say the least.  
“Hi,” Seokmin offered quietly while you were intently staring at the ground.  “It’s nice to see you.”
“I’m sorry my apartment is gross and cluttered and small.”  You muttered.  Seokmin looked around the apartment.  The cookbooks in the kitchen were piled almost as high as the refrigerator, the pink throw blanket on the couch made him smile, seeing a softness that no one else gets to see.  The living room was bathed in lamp light that made the shadows in the room look exaggerated and long.  The apartment was uniquely you and he loved it.  
“What?” He chuckled, “I don’t care what your apartment looks like, is this why you lied?” Your head snapped up at him calling you out so directly.  
“I never lied, I told you to drop me off there, not that I lived there.” You pointed out.  He gave you a look.  “I didn’t lie.”   
“Sure, maybe not,” he sighed.  
“I’m sorry,” You whispered, Seokmin had never seen you at a loss for words like this.  
“Look,” he took your hand, “that’s not why I’m here, it doesn’t matter.” You led him to the couch, moving the open textbook so that he could sit down.  Seeing him sitting on your couch was strange, seeing him here was not something you thought you would ever see.  “Are you okay?” He blurted out.  
“What?” You were taken aback, “of course, I’m fine.”
“You just haven’t been to work in a few days and after…the activities at my apartment I thought maybe you hated me, and–” “Woah!” You smiled, “why would I hate you? Seokmin, I took the week off to focus on finals week.”
“Oh.” He looked at you sheepishly. “Uh, well, how are they going?” You rolled your eyes.  
“Fine, I’ll pass, I miss work though.” You shrugged.  
“Just work?” “No, I miss the way Soonyoung runs out of the kitchen when he sees me.”
“Oh…” He dropped his gaze dejectedly.  “Hey!” He exclaimed as your fist connected with his arm.  
“I miss you, dumb ass.” “So you didn’t quit?” “No,” you looked at him, confused.  “You know you could have asked literally anyone where I was, right?”
“No one was talking about it! I thought we were all super sad about you quitting! I don’t know!” He gestured wildly with his hands.  “And…ugh, okay, you remember that one day like a month ago? When you were asleep in the dining room and I woke you up?”
“Yeah?” “I, uh, I saw what you were working on…the job applications.” He lowered his volume as if he was afraid you would explode.  “I thought you might’ve just up and left, you never liked me anyway, so you didn’t really have any reason to let me know.” 
“Oh,” you sighed.  “I’m sorry…” “Tell me you’ve changed your mind, you’re not leaving us.” “Seokmin….” 
“Is it because of me?”
“Maybe at first,” You started, you could see the tears well up in his eyes. “But now…if anything you’ve made it harder to leave.” 
“Where are you going?” He met your eyes again.  You reached out to swipe the tears that managed to escape.  
“I have a few offers, I don’t know yet.” 
“Of course you do,” he laughed sadly, took hold of your wrists,and rubbed the back of your hands with his thumbs.  “You’re so talented any restaurant would be stupid to not offer you a job.” 
“That’s not what you said a few months ago.” You pointed out. 
“Well, you know how to julienne the carrots now.” 
“Hey!” You tried to push him away but he held you in place.  He glanced at your lips before leaning in to kiss you.  He kissed you softly, his lips tasted vaguely of salt and honey chapstick.  He let himself linger without deepening the kiss until he suddenly pulled back, looking panicked.  
“Those offers are for sous chef positions right?” 
“Of course they are, watch out, Chef Lee.”    
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Three years later
You stretch out on your couch after making the most of your day off.  With your recent promotion to head chef at Diamond you haven’t had a lot of time to relax.  With your new hectic schedule you were shocked that you were able to make it the entire day without getting a single call about the restaurant.  
A hand squeezed your calf gently.  You hummed at the contact.  
“I’ll make dinner tonight, love.” Seokmin mumbled sleepily from the other end of the couch.  
“No.” You stated simply.  
“Um, why not?” 
“‘The only thing worse than the tacky decor at Quartz and Serenity is the incompetence of the kitchen. If you’re looking for the exact opposite of what you asked for, this is the restaurant for you.’” You rattled off.  
“What are you doing?” Seokmin sat up, knocking your legs off the couch. 
“‘I would give them zero stars if I could!’” You stared at him, “‘I ordered a steak and it came out barely cooked at all! Will not be returning!’”
“Okay! In my defense on that one, she ordered a well done steak!” He threw his hands up.  “Who does that?” 
“MichelleJo1965, obviously.” You deadpanned.  
“When did you have time to dig through our Yelp reviews?” Seokmin scoffed, “I didn’t realize dating the competition meant I would have to defend myself at home.” 
“Step up your game, Head Chef Lee.” You shrugged.  “But seriously? She ordered a well done steak?” 
“She did! It’s not my fault she has no taste.” He shrugged.  “By the way I have plenty of great reviews, and I seem to remember my girlfriend really liking my cooking.” “You’re alright, I guess.” You shrugged.  “When are you going to ask me by the way?” 
“What?” He tried to stay calm, you could be talking about anything, certainly not the ring that has been staring at him from under his underwear for the last six months.  
“You really need to figure out where to hide things where I won’t find them” Wordlessly Seokmin got up from the couch and stomped into your shared bedroom.  For a split second you thought you might have pushed too far until he returned with the small velvet box.  
“I hope you at least left me one secret, you didn’t look at it did you?” He smiled sheepishly.  
“No, Min, I have no idea what it looks like, swear.” 
“Good,” to your surprise he sank down to one knee, right there in the living room. “You never were good at leaving well enough alone, I had a grander plan, but this seems much more our speed, huh?” You laughed.  “Will you marry me, even if my Yelp reviews suck sometimes?” He popped the small box open to reveal a ring.  
“Of course I will, you idiot.”   
614 notes · View notes
ceesimz · 2 months ago
Text
Wings (part one)
You return to the Norway National Team. (autistic!reader)
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Reverie fics here! I've put a lot of time and care into this one as I wanted it to feel absolutely right because it's been a plot point since the very first few paragraphs of the original reverie story. So, I really hope I've done it right and done it justice and that you all believe it fits too🙃 (and a p.s. thank you to @pickledwoso for coming up with some perfect ideas for me to work with and keeping me sane whilst writing, v v v grateful <3)
“Ingrid, I have something to tell you.”
It felt right to tell her the decision you’d come to only a few hours before, in a cable car somewhere in Norway; the decision you never thought you would be able to make again. A decision you knew Ingrid had hoped to hear for years.
“Okay.” Ingrid said sceptically, dragging out the ‘y’ at the end as she did so.
You held the phone away from your ear for a second, taking a deep breath and pinching the bridge of your nose. 
Bringing up the idea to Alexia had been one thing. Telling Ingrid about your intentions was another. It made it… real. Very real. And the words felt alien on your tongue, you sort of felt like they didn't belong to you. But, as Alexia and your family had encouraged you to the highest degree, welcoming and respecting and celebrating your decision with open arms, they did belong to you.
“I…” That deep inhale came right back out. Your mouth was dry and when there was a lump in your throat that prevented you from speaking clearly, your voice trembled and cracked with nearly every syllable in your next words. “I think I might try to… come back to the national team.”
For Ingrid, who was some hundred miles away in the same country, that might have been the last thing on earth she thought you would say in that moment. Not because she didn’t believe in you, of course not. That couldn’t be further from the truth. 
“You are serious!?” The dark-haired woman exclaimed, almost leaping out of her chair where she sat at the dinner table with her family. Her brother rolled his eyes, used to her theatrics, meanwhile her parents glanced up at her with an anticipatory look.
Ingrid had been thinking about your situation with the national team for quite a while. She was certain that, at this point of your life, she could put her hand on her heart and say you would flourish if you went back. But you never spoke about it, so she never spoke about it, because it was a line she didn’t want to cross as it could have been catastrophic if she did. You had spent months thinking about your decision to leave all those years ago, you were a shadow of yourself as you struggled with the hectic nature of the career you’d delved into once the popularity of the women’s side grew, as well as the unkind and unfair treatment of the staff at the time. You almost didn’t come out the other side of it. 
Your best friend had had a front row seat to how beautiful your life had turned out after your move to Barcelona. And this, well… she knew it would make your self-esteem, your confidence, your faith in yourself, it’d all sky-rocket. She didn’t have the words to express how utterly proud she was of you; it consumed her whenever she saw you smile, laugh, joke around with your teammates without overthinking everything or just going mute to prevent the possibility of an ounce of embarrassment. Whenever a tough situation came your way, you took your time to figure out the best way to get through it, and faced it head-on. You’d taken these last few years to discover yourself, to find out what you needed, what you were best at, and who you wanted in your life. There wasn’t a more perfect time to take advantage of all those lessons learnt, and tackle the one final thing that weighed on your mind.
“I think I might be.” 
The squeal you were met with was deafening. However, despite how the pitch of it almost made your ears bleed, it overwhelmed you with relief. It didn’t matter that your fellow Norwegian hadn’t actually said anything yet, because that reaction spoke volumes. Literally.
“I am speechless.” Were the words she finally did land on. There was some hushed speaking in the background before you heard her excuse herself, followed by the sound of quick and heavy footsteps until it sounded like she slumped back onto her bed with a dreamy sigh. “You are joining the national team again.”
“Might, Ingrid. I might.” You corrected her, cautious that she was getting ahead of herself. Then, she had the audacity to click her tongue like it was you in the wrong. “There needs to be a lot of thinking going into it. I can’t just do it on a whim. I need to plan, and talk about it, maybe meet with the staff, I need to see what support they can give to me and h-”
“Okay, okay. I know this. Just let me be excited for a moment, let yourself be excited.” You could hear the smile on her face as she spoke, and you’d be lying if you said it didn’t ease your anxiety a little. “We can plan it all another time, not right now. Be happy for yourself, this is a big milestone.” 
Alexia, who had stepped out the room a little while ago to give the two of you some privacy, walked back in at that moment when you let out another deep breath, trying to will away the pit of nausea in your stomach. She expected you to be done on the phone now considering it had been a bit of time, however she was none the wiser to the twenty minutes of hesitation you had at pressing the call button. The door closed softly behind her and she leaned back against it, waiting and giving you the space you needed. 
Honestly, having her there as you talked with Ingrid was comforting. Much more comforting than you thought. You weren’t sure why that was and when your opinion about such a situation had changed; normally these were situations where you did need to be on your own. It was a subtle change, it happened without you knowing, but it was a pretty big one. Having Alexia there helped to remind you that you could do this. 
“It is.” You placated quietly, tracing your finger along the scratches and dents in the wooden desk that’d been in your bedroom since you were a teenager. “I am excited. Just very worried, and… stuff.”
“I am so proud of you.” Ingrid rushed out suddenly, and there was quite a significant amount of emotion in her voice then. “So proud. I- oh my god.”
“What?” You said, somewhat concerned at the slight shock she seemed to be experiencing. It was all explained when, no less than a second later, Ingrid bursted out into full-on sobs. “Ingrid, are you okay?”
“Yes! I’m okay.” She blubbered, to which you turned to Alexia with a slightly amused glance until you felt tears brewing as well. “Just proud. So proud. I can’t even say how proud.”
“Alright, alright. I get it.” You mumbled shyly whilst she continued to cry. It was all very… dramatic. But it also couldn’t have gone any better than it did. 
“When we get back to Barcelona, I’m gonna come see you and I’m gonna hug the life out of you, okay?” Ingrid said sternly, and it was that determination of hers that made your first tear fall. “And then we’re going to make a plan together. We’ll get whoever we need. Me, you, Ale, maybe Caro or Esmee or Frido, whoever you need. We’ll sort things out and make sure you get to do this how you want, how you need. I promise.”
“Okay.” You nodded though she couldn’t see you. Another tear fell, and you realised you felt way too many things then to be able to express what you wanted. It was a flaw you loathed, but a flaw other people accepted. So you learned to accept it too. “I love you, Ingrid.” 
“I love you too. I know you don’t like phone calls so I’m going to let you go, but just in case you didn’t know already, I am really proud of you for this.” You let out a huff of amusement and smiled at her. “Please text me whenever you need to about it, no matter when or what it is. Anything you need, snuppa. Always. I’ll see you soon.”
You thanked her, bid her goodbye, hung up, let your phone fall to your lap, and covered your face with your hands. Alexia waited a minute or two, trying to gauge your feelings, a frown on her face at the sporadic sniffles that came from you. She cautiously took a few steps closer as you leaned forward and took your hands away, resting your arms on the desk and your chin atop them.
“Ingrid is really happy about it.” You murmured, breaths stuttering as you told her. Alexia smiled and came to stand beside you, going to put a hand on your back before hesitating, and opting for the back of your chair instead.
“That’s good.” She hummed, to which you nodded. “Are you?”
“Yeah.” 
Her smile doubled in size and she moved behind you, her arms wrapping around you and her hands landing on top of yours, her chin on your shoulder as she pressed her lips against your cheek.
“You should be. You should be so proud. We’ve all got you through this, I love you.”
You would never tire of hearing that.
Ingrid really wasn't lying when she said she'd hug the life out of you next time you were together. In fact that might have been an understatement. 
At your favourite café, the one you had your first date and were soon to plan your biggest personal milestone at, you were nearly hugged to death by the person that'd watched you grow and had helped you get to this point. Alexia laughed quietly from her chair at the surprise on your face, clearly having underestimated the truth in Ingrid's promise. But then the three of you sat down together, Ingrid across from you with Alexia beside you, and delved straight into it. They didn't hover on the novelty of the decision, knowing too much attention on it might cause you to shut down and close off about it. 
You spent almost two hours with them, making a plan and discussing what accommodations and support you would need to make sure things went as well as possible. An initial list was written, and once you had spent some time thinking about it and finalising everything, then you'd tell the staff at the Norway National Team that you intended to return. Your target was the February international break, but you hadn't written off the possibility that might be too soon. Ingrid and Alexia did well to remind you that it didn't matter when you went back. All that mattered was that you felt you were in a place that you wanted to go back. That was enough of an achievement in itself.
Some days you woke up determined that you could do it, it’d be a breeze, and nothing could dim your excitement. Other times, you were wracked with anxiety. So much so, it was hard to think clearly about it, which is where Alexia and Ingrid came in. Any time you got too overwhelmed at the fucking gigantic obstacle that stood before you, they brought you right back to reality. They gently eased your concerns, offering solutions and words of wisdom and comfort and rationality, to the point you wondered why you’d gotten so worked up in the first place. That happened countless times over breakfast at the café, and you got through it with the end result being a plan to get you back where you belonged.
“I think this is a good starting place now, no?” Alexia smiled over at you and Ingrid whilst you put the lid on your pen and slumped back in your chair, inhaling deeply.
The list was fairly long, featuring things like you getting to choose who you room with or even maybe rooming on your own (though you were sure you’d most likely want to be Ingrid for some peace of mind), making sure there was no pressure to participate in anything you didn’t want to do social wise, being able to drop out of camp at any point should you need to, having the final say in if you want to play in the matches or not, and a number of other things too. It was a good starting place, you were satisfied with the things the three of you had brainstormed so far. Though, it hadn’t done a thing to ease your overall anxiety. Sure, these things might help, but it’s still a terrifying thing to go through with.
After all, what if the staff there just say… no? To your requests? You can ask for help but you can't choose how people decide to help you, which makes such a crucial step so petrifying to approach. Especially when they had no qualms in doing so in the past, and it was probably why you never wanted to tell anyone at Frankfurt about your disability.
You’re an adult, you don’t need these things.
It’s unfair if we make these accommodations just for you and nobody else.
You’re being ridiculous and unnecessary, you have nothing to be so anxious about. 
If you can't handle it, maybe you don't belong here.
Those were the kind of things they said to you back then and they still echoed around your mind anytime you thought about asking for support from anyone. What people don’t understand is that they have a much longer lasting impact than most realise. For the people saying them, they’re just a momentary thing, they’ll forget they said them an hour after the conversation ends. That’s not the reality for you. Hours, days, weeks, months, years after, their words will continue to taunt you and mock you, adding fuel to the fire of the malicious thoughts your brain musters up whenever you’re struggling.
The fact that your entire experience anywhere in the world lies in the hands of the reactions and opinions of other people, both in terms of support and general behaviour, is… there’s no words to describe the fear it induces. A large portion of the world won’t ever need to even worry about having to go through that, yet they’re the ones controlling the puppet strings. It’s very ironic, and unfair.
“It is. Anything else?” Ingrid asked you gently, to which you shook your head. Your face communicated differently, like you still had a million and one things on your mind, which didn’t surprise either of them. “What are you thinking? Anything for right now or shall we finish up?”
The two of them gave you your space to think as you decided whether to voice these fears or not. They’d heard them a hundred times, Ingrid especially, but you still had them anytime you did something new and it would always be this way. 
Your mouth opened and closed a couple times as the last remnants of hesitation slipped away, before you took a sip of your water and spoke afterwards.
“There is so much that’s out of my control.” You began, talking almost in a whisper as the weight of your fear prevented you from speaking any louder. Like, if your voice was half a decibel higher, the staff at the national team all the way in Norway would come storming into the cafe with pitchforks at the ready. “I tried for years to advocate for what I need and they hardly gave me anything. They could just do the same again.”
Alexia knew that was something Ingrid would have to answer to; not only because it was the team Ingrid played for as well, but also because… she’d had to fight for things at Spain camp too, everyone knew that, and everyone knew that things didn’t go well and still weren’t going well. So, instead of floundering to find the right words she didn’t have, she reached out to put her hand on your knee. Within a second, your hand slipped under hers, and she squeezed it instantly to offer some more comfort. You glanced at her and just one look at her face, at her soft smile that spoke volumes of her confidence in you and her eyes that were so loving and free of judgement, it grounded you. How was that possible?
“The staff that are there now aren’t the same as who were there in the past. There has been a lot of reshuffling over the years to try and make it a better place for everybody and I’m certain that it is much better. I would never lie or sugarcoat that, I mean it absolutely.” Ingrid answered honestly, and you could tell by the seriousness in her face that she did mean it absolutely. You looked at Alexia again for a moment, feeling extra secure in the response to your question when she nodded, even if she had no idea whether Ingrid was telling the truth or not. “The only person that is still there is Heidi, who you-”
“She does the best kjøttkaker med potetmos!” 
At the mention of the one person that still worked for the national team, your face and mood lit up. Ingrid grinned and nodded, whilst Alexia chuckled softly with a shake of her head. Even in the time you’d been with her, which was years after you last played for Norway, Alexia had heard all about Heidi’s, one of the chefs hired by the team, excellent cooking, especially for one of your favourite safe foods from back home. 
…surely, in only a few years, she hadn’t lost her talent?
“She’ll be so happy to see you again, kjære.” That reminded you of another worry you had.
“What about everyone else?” You mumbled sheepishly, insecurity clear in your tone that had your girlfriend frowning beside you. 
“Trust me, they will all welcome you back with open arms. Please don’t doubt that for a second.” Ingrid said firmly, ensuring she didn’t leave any room for you to still fear such a thing. 
It was understandable, of course it was. Both Ingrid and Alexia knew why you would be worried – in situations like that, the people you’re surrounded by could make or break your experience entirely. Regardless, it still killed them to hear you sound so uncertain if your return would be well received, and it hurt them even more that they couldn’t swear on their lives that it would, because it was just an unknown where the only way to tackle it was… by going through it. 
If they could change the world to make it a better experience just for you, no matter the cost for their own livelihoods, they would do it in a heartbeat. They didn’t believe it was fair you had to live with these anxieties all the time, but if they could help by at least being there for you, then they would settle for that.
“Don’t forget that you aren’t doing this alone, engel.” Alexia chipped in softly as her hand squeezed yours once more. “You will have Ingrid there, Caro, Frida, Maren. There will be some you haven’t met or spent much time with and it’s normal to be worried about meeting them, but you won’t have to do that alone. You’ll have people there that love you. And I will only be a phone call away, for anything.” 
These were all things that, when you were in the right mindset to think rationally, you knew. The anxiety that’s experienced with autism is a hard thing to describe, it’s different to a general anxiety disorder. Anxiety from an autistic perspective doesn’t involve just the fear of the unknown, it’s the chaos and the unpredictability of what is known. You know there’s people out there that hate you because of how your brain works, they could be next to you and you wouldn’t know until you do something that ‘provokes’ a reaction from. You know there’s people out there that believe you’re weak, that you’re worth less than the average human because of some minor things you can’t do, that are waiting for you to trip up so they can make a laughing stock of you. You know there’s people out there that are looking for an excuse to use your disorder against you. And there’s almost nothing you can do about it.
Nothing, but live your life how you want to. So that’s what you’ll do.
“Okay. I think that might be it for now.” You decided as, by that point, you were a little overwhelmed and in need of some time to process everything that had been discussed and planned. The two of them nodded, but they didn’t say anything. Ingrid especially just… looked at you. Very peculiarly. “What’s that face for?”
“Nothing.” She shrugged, though it was very clear she was fighting off a rather large grin. Then, it hit you what she was thinking and dying to do.
“Don’t say i-”
“I’m just so proud of you.” She beamed, and it was a miracle she didn’t start running laps of the café judging by the excitement on her face. You groaned and rolled your eyes, covering your face with your hands as Alexia laughed and put an arm around your shoulder to pull you into her side. 
“I’m so proud of you too.” The blonde murmured, her lips grazing your temple in a soft kiss that had Ingrid rolling her eyes at the hopeless state of you both. 
“We’re done. Home time.” You told them, shy and a little embarrassed under their constant praise, standing abruptly in your chair. They laughed, not at all offended because it was so you, and stood up too.
The three of you tucked your chairs in, you folded up the piece of paper your list was on, slipped it into your pocket, then suddenly found yourself in the centre of a group hug.
“Gruppeklem!” Ingrid called out a tad too loud for the small café you were in, though you didn’t find yourself caring. As they wrapped their arms around you and embraced you tightly, literally surrounding you with their love, you realised you couldn’t care less about the people around you when these two were by your side at all times. 
Despite how well the planning had gone, the topic was still on your mind for the rest of the day – a day which was relaxed, with no plans, to allow you the time to come down from your stresses and process the onslaught of information you’d taken in over breakfast.
Luckily, you had the perfect solution to all your problems that evening.
A combination of two of your favourite love languages: physical touch and quality time. However, it wasn’t quality time in the normal sense, rather for people like you, it was more commonly called parallel play. Being in the same space as Alexia whilst you both did your own individual things, in your own worlds, was something you adored and wouldn't ever be able to describe why. And you both were in your own worlds; you playing a video game on the TV whilst Alexia had her nose stuck in whatever true crime book she’d chosen that week. 
The midfielder was lay back against the sofa cushions as you sat against the arm of it, your legs across her lap and her hand on your thigh trailing her fingers absentmindedly, the only time she stopped being when she turned a page. Dinner had been and gone, it was late evening by that point, and a good forty minutes had passed since you last exchanged even just a word with each other. Because it wasn’t necessary.
On the other hand, Alexia knew that your mind was going a million miles per hour, she swore she could almost hear it. Instead of disturbing you, she let you be, like always. You would come to her if you needed it, which was exactly what you did. Even though you knew you were probably getting a bit repetitive at this point, sometimes you just needed a single reminder to put you at ease.
When you paused your game, Alexia noticed, but she didn’t react. You seemed hesitant to speak, though she knew you would eventually, so she didn’t push. You were almost certain you didn’t love anything else in the world more than how well Alexia knew you.
“You seriously think I can do this?” You whispered. 
In an instant, her book was closed and her attention was on you. Her now free hand reached out for yours, her head dropped back against the cushions, and she gazed at you with a smile that revealed her answer before she even spoke. 
“I have never been more confident in anything in my life, than I am in you right now.” 
Well, what more could you ever need?
“That’s a bold statement, Ale.” You teased her lightly, a hint of a smile on your face with some pink cheeks that Alexia swore was her favourite sight in the world. 
“It is one I believe in and you should too.” The look she fixed you with was a mix of sternness and softness, but it did little to settle you much. With a sarcastic roll of her eyes, she gently pushed your legs off of her and shuffled closer to sit on the edge of the couch, putting her hands on either of your cheeks. She kissed your forehead, a featherlight brush of her lips that caught you off guard with the pure tenderness of it, before she gave you that same look from a moment ago. “Stop thinking for tonight, okay? It’s not doing you any favours, so stop. Give yourself a rest. What can I do to help?” 
You shrugged, not giving yourself a second to consider it because you didn’t want to ask for anymore from her. Until she raised her eyebrow at you, a light scolding that made you laugh quietly.
“Can’t we just… lay here, together? You help without even having to do anything.” You sounded incredibly shy as you answered her, she couldn’t help but grin in turn. Though, secretly, that was an admission that she was sure she would remember forever; it was all she could wish for. 
So for the rest of the evening, that’s exactly what you both did. Alexia instructed that you lay on top of her with your head on her chest, which you were more than happy to comply with, and she resumed her story as you put on a show on the TV. One hand held her book whilst the other slid under your shirt, splaying out on your back and soothingly tracing shapes with her fingernails up and down. Then, the two of you retired to bed later on, and you woke up the next morning without feeling like an elephant was seated right upon your heart. God only knows where you would be without Alexia.
February came around much sooner than you anticipated, which meant it was time to leave. You decided a few weeks before that this was the right time to go, and with some back and forth meetings with the necessary staff, your accommodation requests had been met. Without any hesitation or argument or frustration. It went… oddly smooth.
The meetings and video calls were not good for your heart due to the anxiety they caused, but Alexia was there by your side when she could and you got through them all like they were nothing. Most importantly, you stood your ground. If someone suggested something else or wasn’t sure if it could be done, you hardly flinched, and assertively told them exactly what it was you were asking for. It was kind of hard not to be distracted during them when Alexia would grin like a proud maniac off camera every time you advocated for yourself.
And fortunately for you, by some miracle, the day you both had to leave her flight was later than yours, so you managed to spend the morning together where she helped to make sure you were absolutely ready to go, both in the sense of packing and how you were feeling mentally. You’d never reach a perfect state of mind about going, you were still an anxious wreck, but it was more nerves than anything else. You were prepared, you were ready, you wanted to do this and you were going to do it. Not only that, you were going to try your damned hardest to make sure it went well. 
When you received the call that you were officially part of the lineup for the next camp, and when you saw your name in the call-up announcement, it was an unmatchable feeling. Sure, you already knew that you were going to be part of it considering it was all you thought about for weeks, but having your name down with your teammates, old and new, there were no words to describe it. 
You were minding your business when the email came through, in the physio room after training for Barça when your phone went off with the notification. With no idea what it could be, you opened it, only to gasp so intensely you could have actually created a blackhole in the room for a second. Where in the past you would have kept that moment to yourself, you couldn’t help but turn to Esmee on the bed beside you and show her it. Her reaction was somewhat like yours, just a little less oxygen-stealing and a bit more reserved. She hardly had time to give you a hug before you were darting out the room and beelining straight for the locker room.
In the midst of your rushing, you nearly knocked over three different members of staff, all of which received flustered apologies from the culprit, you, who was already rounding the corner and out of sight. You hadn’t ever run so fast in your life outside of a football pitch, and you then gave each teammate the fright of their lives by how utterly loud the door slammed open. But it was worth it to see you so consumed by joy, it was written all over your face the minute you walked in. You didn’t exactly mean to announce the news to everyone in there, you only intended to tell Alexia and Ingrid what had happened, but in your excitement you sort of forgot to keep your voice at a minimum. That meant that one second, everybody was quiet and intrigued at what had caused such a reaction, and the next they were all surrounding you with their pride and their congratulatory words when you burst out the news. 
You knew the time would come at any point after you had your last call with them, yet it still took you by surprise. It was one of the best feelings you ever had. And for once, the anxiety didn’t completely overboard you, you were on cloud-nine and your mind let you. 
Until you actually had to leave, and the moment you were stood by the door with your suitcase, heart racing unbearably fast as you said goodbye to Alexia, it all came flying straight back. 
You were, on paper, back where you belonged. But you had to actually get there first, which was a challenge in itself because it felt like the second you stepped out the door and closed it behind you, there really was no going back.
Though, you had to do it eventually as no amount of stalling with minutes spent in Alexia’s embrace was going to hold off the inevitable. It’s just that… two weeks apart from her sounded really unappealing. This international break felt different than the rest – whereas beforehand you would stay in Barcelona as Alexia went to Madrid or whatever country she was playing in for Spain, this time you were obviously heading to Norway. You were grateful that both games for you were played at home, but god you were going to miss her during the break more than you ever had when you’d been apart.
With a sickening amount of reluctance, you eventually did manage to drag yourself away from her and down to the car where both Ingrid and the driver had been waiting a bit longer than they’d hoped for you.
Then, a couple hours later, you were in Norway.
“I can’t believe I’m actually here.” You breathed out shakily as you and Ingrid stood before the hotel the team had booked in Oslo.
“You are actually here.” Ingrid beamed beside you, her arm linked through yours and nudging you out of excitement.
First order of business was finding your room, that was easy. But after that, there was a whole team dinner. Hell.
“I think I might be sick.” You swallowed nervously as the woman beside you laughed and shook her head.
“We’ve got this! Are you ready to go in?”
“‘Ready to go in,’ she asks.” You scoffed, though you contradicted yourself with how you headed towards the entrance. Ingrid tried her best to control her excitement, but she was very self-aware at the fact she probably looked somewhat in pain due to the intense smile she was holding off. Thankfully for her pride, however, you stopped in your tracks just outside the doors to go in, and in turn she frowned a little. You glanced at her, then the doors, and back at her again. “You’ll stick with me always?”
There was only one suitable reply from Ingrid.
“Like glue, søster.”
If there was anyone that stuck to their word, it was her. And it was that final push that gave you an ounce of confidence that was enough to go inside. 
Luckily, the two of you were some of the first to arrive, and the others that also had were already up in their rooms, which made your first order of business just that bit easier. Introductions could be saved for later, at dinner.
A whole team dinner. Where the whole team would be. The team you hadn’t seen in years, or hadn’t even met. The team that could either love you or hate you for not representing your country once in the last few years. The team where each person would do anything for the crest on their jerseys, the names on their backs, and the anthem that played before each match.
What on earth had you done.
“Ingrid, I don’t know if I can do this.” You fretted a little later in your room after spending some time there, unpacking and overthinking, before you were due down for dinner. Time had gone far too fast for your liking. 
Ingrid had a hand on the door handle as you stood behind her, shaking with nerves and sick to the pit of your stomach. Even forgetting what felt like your inability to socialise and greet people in that moment, you probably wouldn’t even be able to stomach a forkful of food during the meal either. It was merely a recipe for disaster.
“You can, I believe in you. I’ll be there the whole time, alright? You know that. Once you get there and get sat down, we’ll be okay.” She reassured you. 
God knows how many times she’d uttered those words or similar over her life, yet she had no qualms doing it then and probably forever. It never failed to amaze you how much patience this woman had.
At that, you followed her out the room and down to the hotel restaurant with a feigned confidence that you wore like armour. If you told yourself you belonged, maybe you would start to believe it. So that’s what you did; you walked in, head held high and a calm expression on your face that you hoped worked as a good disguise for the absolute reactor meltdown happening inside your mind. Alarms going off, red lights flashing, system on overdrive, workers in hazmat suits running riot like headless chickens, buzzers beepi-
“Is this table okay?”
It was one of the ones at the back of the room, a little bit away from the front where Gemma, the manager, would stand with the rest of her staff to welcome everyone back. 
Oh fuck. Would she welcome you back and make a big deal out if it?
“Kjære?” Right.
“Sorry, yes, here is fine. We’re the first ones here?” You asked, looking around at the sparse room apart from the cooking staff setting up off to one side.
“Looks like it.” 
Over the next ten minutes or so, your teammates slowly began to trail in. Each one came over after spotting Ingrid first, until they spotted you. And every time, their faces lit up immeasurably more when they realised who they'd bumped into. 
They were happy to see you. Or at least they seemed it, you weren't a mind reader so could only take their kindness at face value. One by one, they took their time to catch up with you or to properly introduce themselves, bright smiles on their faces and their tones welcoming. Maren and Ada gave you a huge hug, Caro wandered over with a quietly proud look in her eye, Frida immediately took a seat beside Ingrid and delved the three of you into conversation. Karina, Teri, and Celin filled the rest of the table after greeting you, followed by a couple others coming over before finding their seats within the room.
And as simple as that, the hardest part was over.
Did your hands tremble like a magnitude 8.0 earthquake? Yes. Did the amount of strangers in the room terrify you? Undoubtedly. But did you make it through regardless? Of course you did.
You were capable of so much more than your anxious mindset gave you credit for. It was cruel and it was evil, the tricks it’d play on you to make these sorts of things seem much more daunting then they were, but some things would never change and the terror that filled you in the anticipation and the build up to a nerve-wracking occasion was certainly one of them. 
You’d built the situation up in your head so much that when you got through the ‘scariest’ part, you didn’t exactly know what to do with yourself or where to go next. All your focus had been on meeting everyone again, when it was over, it all felt very… anticlimactic. T’was a little humbling.
“You coming to get dinner? There’s someone there waiting for you.” Ingrid grinned slyly. Apparently you were so deep in your daydreams you’d missed how everyone had left to go collect their meals. That was a habit you could never shake off. 
You stood and trailed behind the dark-haired woman, queueing up along with the team and slowly padding your way to the front. You heard her gasp before you saw her.
“Look who's back!” Heidi. God was it such a relieving sight to see someone you knew, someone that worked for the national team that didn't resent you when you asked for what you needed like they all did in the past. It was refreshing, relieving, and the exact perfect reminder that it wasn’t all doom and gloom, if at all.
The older woman didn’t hesitate in rounding the corner of the buffet setup to engulf you in a bear hug that felt comforting, like a warm welcome back. 
“It’s so good to see you again.” You told her, only for her to squeeze you harder, almost forcing the oxygen out of your lungs with the sheer strength of it.
“You don’t say!” She let out a hearty laugh, and despite the years that had passed, not a single thing about her had changed.
Her hair, silver-streaked and woven into the neatest plait on earth, was hardly tucked away under the net she wore and the cool colour of it did nothing to distract away from the warmth her demeanor oozed, nor did the ice blue of her eyes. She was the picture of what living a true, kind life could lead to; one could only hope to age as well as her. Wrinkles dotted her face, though they weren’t from age alone, they were from decades of time well spent, laughing and smiling with people she truly valued, people like you. People whose lives she made a hell of a lot better by being who she was. 
There was something about her that, upon first meeting, made you feel at ease, like you had at least one person who understood you in an environment where most didn’t. And years later, you still felt that way and more in her company. Even just her presence gave you a spark of hope, which would sound strange to some, but she was the type of person that restored one’s faith in humanity. The talented chef had stories for centuries, and somehow each had a different life lesson that left every listener dwelling on it in awe the rest of the night. She’d lived through some hardships, many more difficult than most could grasp, yet there was no bitterness in her. 
Only when someone dared to mention retirement to her. 
“You will never understand how happy I am that you are here.” After she let you go from her embrace, her weathered hands cupped your cheeks with a delicateness only someone like her possessed. They trembled the tiniest bit as her thumbs ran along your cheekbones, gazing up at you in wonder, as if you joining the national team again was like the second coming of Christ.
“Took me some time but nevermind.” You smiled shyly, only for her to tut at you with a stern eyebrow raise and a shake of her head. 
“None of that. I have something for you.” Before you could stop her, tell her there was no need, she was rounding the counter and ducking down to grab something from the hot cupboard. She stood up straight, in her arms a silver food platter. And when she took the lid off to reveal a steaming hot meal, there was only one thing it could be. “Your favourite!”
It wasn’t on the menu, not at all, yet she went out of her way to make it anyway. No matter how small a gesture it may seem to others, it meant the world to you. Heidi didn’t have to do that, she didn’t have to treat you like her own blood, but it was just in her nature to be that kind of person. It turned your whole day around. 
“Heidi!” You exclaimed, looking at the dish with an ecstatic expression. Single-handedly, she had just solved your food concerns for that evening, because the offer of a safe food cooked by the best that made it was simply no match for whatever tricks your anxiety tried to pull on you. “I can’t believe you! Thank you!”
“I also will make your favourite breakfast tomorrow too, the best vafler in the land.” The wise lady grinned coyly with a wink. “Think of it as a welcome back, to get you settled in, okay? I’m proud of you for coming back, now go sit yourself down before you miss the briefing. Come find me afterwards for a catchup.” 
Speechless. You were utterly speechless at her kindness. Every time you saw her again, she seemed to one-up herself without fail. 
Internally, Ingrid marvelled at the smile on your face as you sat back down with your food and took a photo of it to show it off to Alexia, before immediately digging into it. It was like night and day, what that one act of kindness had done, because suddenly you weren’t stuck in your head overthinking everything, and instead were just happy to be there. You hardly even flinched at the small message Gemma gave in her briefing at your return, you simply smiled and forgot about it when she moved on to the next topic. 
Some things were so simple and easy and small, yet somehow always made the biggest differences. If more people understood that, how far a little kindness could go, God only knows what the world could look like not just for people like yourself but for everyone. For now, however, you were happy to settle for some incredible kjøttkaker med potetmos and the warm, bubbly feeling in your chest at the fact you were surrounded in your life by people that adored you so wholeheartedly, they’d even get excited at a fairly bland meal whilst they were hundreds of miles away in a completely different country. 
Alexia decided to refrain from telling you about the teasing she got as a result of checking her phone every minute in the hopes of a text from you, and the gigantic smile with a pink tinge to her cheeks she adorned whenever she did get a message. That was information you would never let her live down.
With little fanfare and fuss, the first training session the next day was… fine. It was good. It was different from Barcelona and Frankfurt, every team’s training was wildly different, but you found your groove fairly quick. Some of your teammates and staff even went so far to say it was like you never left, you adjusted that well. Which felt like the highest compliment you could receive, and it was, considering the way it never left your mind for the rest of the day.
What came with your list of amendments and accommodation was the freedom you had to choose how your days went, aside from the football related activities. So once training finished and the cool down in the gym, where you were left alone from anyone you knew previously with a bunch of the players you’d newly met, went off without a hitch and the tactics discussion for the upcoming game came and went, you had the rest of the day to do whatever you wanted. 
Initially, you floundered at the overwhelming prospect of plans thrown around by the people you and Ingrid hung around with, as well as others piling in their suggestions, so heading back to your room for a little while seemed like your best bet for the time being. 
In your mind, as you sat on the edge of your bed, every idea someone had was an opportunity to try and fit in socially with the team. Slotting in well on the football side was good, best case scenario really and all you could ask for, but feeling like you belonged as a person and not just a player would be the cherry on the cake. So you thought through each suggestion, approaching them like they were tactical styles for a game and trying to guess which one would end in the best result for you, your hands tapping endlessly on your knees as you stared out the window in front of you. 
Going out with Celin, Teri, and Karina could be fun, but they were a loud bunch. You were notoriously shy around people you didn’t know, you didn’t want to bring the mood down by being with them. So you could tag along with Caro and Guro and Sophie and a few others, though again apart from Caro you didn’t know them all that well. With people you don’t know, you can’t prepare for hanging with them, which opens up a world of awkwardness. There was Maren who wanted to catch up with you, Frida wondered if you and Ingrid wanted to go to a cafe she liked in the area, there were so many possibilities yet you had no idea where to start. It felt like you had too much to do with too little time, even though it was only the first full day.
Ingrid kept an eye on you from afar, ensuring you didn’t work yourself up too much, until that exact thing happened and you stood abruptly with a groan.
“What’s bothering you?” She prodded gently, dropping her phone to the bed and fixing you with a reassuring look.
“I don’t know what to do the rest of the day.” You sighed, pinching the bridge of your nose as Ingrid smiled. She stayed silent, giving you space to think. A moment later, you collected your thoughts and tried your best to construct them. “I just don't know. There's so many choices, I didn't know what was on the agenda for today so I couldn't really think in advance. I also don't want to drag you away from whatever you want to do, so that ma-”
“You know by now that I don't care about that. And if I ever did, if there was something that I was unbelievably desperate to do, I would tell you. But there isn't. I love spending time with you, that'll never change, you're my best friend. So, talk it through with me. Do your thinking out loud, it'll help rather than keeping it all stuck in there and overwhelming you.” Her interruption was stern but with good intentions, a minor warning that ticked all the right boxes.
“Okay.” You nodded, took a deep breath, and sat on the end of her bed, facing her with your legs crossed. “I want to get to know everyone if I can. I want to fit in as a person, not just a player. But I don’t know where, or who, to start with. Everyone is so welcoming and I didn’t really expect that, and now I don’t want to disappoint anyone by not seeing them today.”
“We have two weeks here, remember? We don’t have to do everything possible in Oslo today. Take it easy for today, do what feels right, what you want to do and not what you think everyone else wants you to.” 
You considered it for a moment. Then decided that actually made a lot of sense.
“Getting coffee with Frida sounds good.” You stated sheepishly. You’d made a big thing out of nothing, once again. Though, you didn’t spend too long dwelling on that because to the people that mattered, they couldn’t care less about it. In a good way, that is.
“It does. So that’s what we’ll do.”
And that’s what you did. 
An hour after your momentary blip, you were out walking the chilly but sunny streets of the capital. You hadn’t been there in a long time, so spending your first day refamiliarising yourself with the city with Frida and Ingrid was a good way to ease into the next fortnight. The young blonde midfielder was great company, and honestly you were glad to finally have the opportunity to get to know her more. Ingrid had sung her praises plenty of times, so to be with her now as well as the dark-haired defender as a buffer was perfect. 
The whole afternoon was perfect. The three of you spent hours, dipping in and out of different trinket shops and cafes, whilst conversation flowed easily throughout. Most importantly, you didn’t feel the need to mask much, and that was always the best sign of a budding friendship for you. So when you trudged back to your room, bidding Frida a goodbye as you went your separate ways with Ingrid, you felt you’d had a pretty successful first day. Really, it couldn’t have gone any better if you tried. 
There was just one niggle in the back of your mind as you slipped your shoes off and slumped down onto your bed; it was only the first day, and already you missed Alexia a million times more than you thought. You would have done anything to be able to have her waiting for you in the hotel room, ready to welcome you back with open arms and endless reminders of how proud she was. But no, she was in a different country, doing her own thing with her own team on her own schedule, and there was no getting around that. You took a glance at your phone to see it void of notifications from her, just to top it all off. 
As a result, despite the day you’d had, you were left feeling pretty flat. 
Unfortunately, when you got stuck spiralling, your mind was your own worst enemy. You took your longing for her as a sign that you possibly relied on her too much. Without giving it much thought, you decided that had to change. She didn’t need you nagging her, constantly talking about yourself and how your day went when she had to pull her team and its dividedness together. Distancing yourself from her was for the better, for her sake, or so you thought.
Not much could get past Alexia, however.
“Hi!” The Spaniard said down the phone the second you picked up a couple hours later, after dinner when you were just about to get into bed. Then she cleared her throat, trying to quell her unbridled excitement. “Hola, engel. How was your day?”
“It was good. Nothing… nothing much.” The first red flag of the phone call.
“Oh, really? Your first day training with Norway again was nothing?” She teased lightly, not quite catching the gist of your plan. 
“Yeah, it was.”
There was an awkward silence as Alexia frowned in confusion where she waited in the elevator for it to reach her floor. She'd ran from the dinner hall the moment she could get away, just to talk to you. She was expecting an upbeat version of you, not the one she got.
“Are you okay?” She murmured. All she got in response was a half-assed hum.
Ingrid, who was gathering her things from her suitcase to have a shower, couldn't help but eavesdrop. She knew exactly what you were doing, hell, she'd been on the receiving end of it a number of times in the early days of knowing you. 
Other people's opinions terrified you, and one sub-topic of that was how scared you were of people thinking you were incapable of doing anything on your own. Incapable of being your own person, of not depending on anyone, of needing your hand held through every little life event. And as someone that hadn't ever been in such a serious relationship before, and had also been called childish and other insults a million times for apparently ‘lacking’ independence, the line between missing someone and being too clingy was blurred for you. Consequently, you did what you did best: avoiding situations that made your chest ache and your mind spiral.
Except that was hard to do when you were doing it in front of two people that knew you best.
“Are you sure you're o-”
“Yes, I'm sure, Alexia.”
Alexia thought she might have been sick, it was so far from how she pictured the day ending. When she called you, she swore she could almost hear you relaying your day with a shy excitement to your voice before you'd even picked up the phone. As it turned out, things couldn't have been further from the truth.
On the other hand, the outsider in all this rolled her eyes. When emotions weren't tied into a situation, it was actually pretty easy to see the real picture.
With absolutely zero hesitation, Ingrid dropped her things on her bed and marched over to you. She could vaguely hear Alexia fumbling a response that you weren't paying a single bit of mind to, but before the midfielder could finish, the phone was snatched from your hands and put on speaker.
“Ingrid! What the hell are you do-”
“Alexia, please don't be discouraged by her. She's panicking because she misses you. And she's worrying because she's never had anyone to miss before, she doesn't want you to think of her as clingy or anything. When we both know she's not clingy, she's in love. So, be her girlfriend, tell her you love her, and get her to tell you how successful her day was. Thank you.”
Just like that, she handed the phone back to you and headed into the bathroom, the lock clicking behind her.
For a few seconds, the line was silent between you and your girlfriend. You were frozen in place where you lay, whilst Alexia had her hand on the handle of her hotel room, a small, amused smile beginning to make its way onto her face at the strange turn of events. Although it upset her to hear what you were really thinking, it was fixable, with only a few words of reassurance. And it just so happened to be that expressing how much she adored you was one of her favourite things to do.
“Is that true?” She asked, finally stepping into her room and leaning back against the door as it shut. There was another pause, until you scoffed lightly, and Alexia broke out into a grin.
“...Maybe.” 
Some soft laughter down the phone had you groaning and slapping a hand over your face, whilst the culprit of your embarrassment slumped down on her bed and kept the grin on her face.
“Why would you think that, engel? I told you before you left that I want to hear from you, always, whenever you want. I have my phone notifications at full volume so I don't miss any of your calls or texts.” The blonde recalled the teasing she'd received the night before after Laia called her out for her attachment to her phone, the same teasing she was adamant she wouldn't tell you about. Well, she'd do just about anything to make you feel better. “Everybody keeps teasing me for being on my phone so much, apparently I don't leave it alone.”
“Apparently?” You joked, a small smile growing at the chuckle she replied with.
“Sí. How do you know I'm not checking the weather all the time? You know I hate the rain.”
“No, you just miss me too much.” You weren't wrong there.
“I do, and it's normal for you to miss me too much too. There is no such thing as too much, amor. You're not clingy. I want you to tell me everything, I wish I could talk to you all day every day, I wish I could be there in the cold with you. So please, tell me everything. Even all the boring things. Nothing is boring or too much with you, because it is you. Do you understand?” She spoke earnestly, not an ounce of judgement or mockery in her tone. She spoke with every intention of getting you to believe her, and you fell for it everytime, it was impossible not to.
“I have never missed anyone as much as I miss you right now.” 
It was an admission you weren't expecting to voice but one you believed with every fibre of your being. It came out quietly and shyly, because you were sharing a certain truth that scared you. Alexia didn't scare you, that couldn't be further from reality. But sometimes when you thought about it, when you thought about how she was the first person in the world you showed every single part of yourself to, it terrified you of what she could do with all that. You hadn't done that before, ever. 
Then she walked into your life, strolling over to you on your first day at Barcelona with an ease to her that gave you butterflies, and all of a sudden half your life was merged with someone else's. You'd spent years building up a wall between your heart and the rest of the world, something you didn't have much of a choice in if you wanted to protect your sanity and will to live. Someone was on the other side of that wall now, had your heart in the palm of their hands, and whilst that was the scariest thing you'd ever done, more than rejoining the national team, when you stepped back and remembered who it was, there wasn't a thing about it you would change. 
The back and forth of fear and serenity was tiring, but it was happening less and less. This time, however, you knew it wouldn't happen again when-
“I feel the same way.” She stated definitively, leaving zero room for you to disbelieve her. “I would do anything to be there to watch you play in a Norway jersey with my own eyes. If I wasn't one more thing away from being kicked off the national team then I'd be there for you, of course I would. I really would give anything to be there in person.”
“Really?” You mumbled sheepishly.
“Yes! Yes I would. Without a doubt. I know it scares you that you feel like this, it scares me too. But nothing truly good ever comes without it being at least a little terrifying. Like now, you’re in Norway, playing for your country. It was the scariest thing you’d ever done but you’re there now and in only a couple days you’ll be out on the pitch, doing what you’ve wanted to do for the last few years. It’s always worth it in the end, no?” The last sentence was said with a knowing, soft intonation behind it. 
To hear she felt the same was surprising. She was Alexia Putellas, someone that never appeared to show a bit of weakness or fear in anything she did. There was you, who could barely stomach the thought of going to a farmer’s market on a busy day. None of that mattered when you were on the phone with that very ‘fearless’ woman, who was openly admitting that the things she felt scared her, though she knew it was worth it. That you were worth it. 
“I had no idea you felt the same way.” Again, she let out a little laugh, a sound that made your heart skip a beat even if that was an incredibly cliche thing to say. You were quickly learning that love actually was quite cliche, and you weren’t the slightest bit mad at it. As someone that never had anyone to experience the cliches with, you wanted to experience all of them, no matter how sickly sweet.
“This is why we talk about things, engel. It’s just me. You know I will never judge you for anything you say to me.” 
“I know that.” You told her. Then you went quiet for a few moments, because something that you’d realised a couple months back suddenly made itself known, and in a second it felt like it became a life or death matter to tell the very person it concerned. “Ale, you’re my safe person.”
The woman in question didn’t know what that meant. It still made her blush nevertheless, and she lay in bed with a redness to her cheeks and a coy smile on her face like a lovesick teenager. 
“What does that mean?” 
It was your turn to blush as you turned to momentarily hide your face in your pillow even though she couldn’t see you. You weren’t embarrassed as such to tell her such a thing, but in your world it was a pretty big title to give someone. Hell, it was the biggest.
Like you had your safe foods, safe routine, safe places, Alexia was the encyclopedia for all that, as well as your best friend and someone you didn’t need to mask around and someone you were madly in love with. If telling her that didn’t scare her off, you might just have to start believing that she did in fact want to spend the rest of her life with you. 
However… that didn’t seem like such a shocking thing to you anymore. Maybe in her books, it was a year too late to start thinking that for yourself. But it was new for you, unheard of actually. It brought you immeasurable amounts of comfort, contentment, and pride. It was one of the first notable steps of progress you could recognise within yourself that you felt deserving of, and that was sure to give way to a world of possibilities for your confidence. 
She definitely was your safe person, there was no denying that, and you didn’t want to deny it. You didn’t want your insecurities in the way anymore. Ale loved you and that feeling was unrivalled; you couldn’t wait for a lifetime of it.
“It means… I love you. More than anyone or anything. It means that being with you is the greatest comfort of my life and nothing could compare to it.” You started, and Alexia swore she could feel herself growing emotional. “You make the world seem quieter and feel safer. You make me feel like I can do anything because I have you, whether that’s when you’re beside me or just on the phone. I’m more myself around you than any other person on the planet and I’ve never experienced that before. Even better, you love me like that. You love me. The true me. Not the masked version where everything people normally don’t like about me is hidden. You love me even when I don’t love myself and that makes me feel safe. Because in that I feel valued, adored, all those kinds of things and the security that gives me is something I've never had before. Now, I… don't know what I would do without it. I certainly wouldn't be here right now.”
Coincidentally, to Alexia, it was also the biggest compliment she could ever receive. All that you said, was all she could ever dream of hearing and achieving. There was a rush of emotions she felt as a result of your short ramble, too fast for her to identify anything so soon, but there were two outliers that she’d be able to recognise no matter what; love, and pride. God, she felt so much pride towards you and towards herself, because you had gotten yourself where you were then, and because she was the exact person she wanted to be in her relationship. The worries and doubts she had at the start with you couldn’t be further away, there was no world they could exist in when you were saying such unimaginable things to her. Fortunately, she didn’t have to imagine them, they were the truth. They were the reality of the dynamic of your relationship. 
Neither of you could ever ask for anything more – from each other, from the world, from your lives. Everything you needed was within each other.
“I will always try to be that person for you, engel. There is nobody else I would rather be.”
That was a pretty big statement in itself. 
She didn’t care for being a footballer, for being Alexia Putellas. All she cared for was being your girlfriend, your safe person, the best version of those two she could be. The rest were just bonuses to her now. The gravity of what she just said wasn’t lost on you, it was perhaps the greatest verbal demonstration of her love she had ever given. You were pretty sure your life peaked in that moment.
“So, stop making me cry and tell me how your day went.” Alexia said, and you heard her sniffle quietly afterwards. You laughed, and she laughed too, both nearly delirious with the affection you had for each other. “I only have so long before Irene comes back and she is not seeing me like this. Hurry. I want to hear it all.” 
At her request, you spent the next half hour relaying the events of your day, whilst Alexia lay there on her back, staring up at the ceiling, a hopeless and proud smile on her face and a hand over her heart, trying to calm the fluttery feeling in her chest that only increased with every bit of good news you revealed. She would simply never be able to vocalise how proud she was, the short five letter word simply wasn’t enough for her.
But with a miserable amount of reluctance, there came a time where you had to hang up for the night. And as silly as it may seem, going from talking to her, albeit on the phone, and having the comfort of her again, only to hang up and have nothing but an empty bed was a downer. Thankfully though, you did still have the woman that led you to have that conversation with you.
After you dropped your phone to the bed with a grumpy sigh, you looked to your left where Ingrid was on her bed, earphones in on her laptop. It seemed you were filled to the brim with adoration that night, because you got up and went to join her. You slumped down beside the dark-haired woman and rested your head on her shoulder, though opted out of speaking. This, Ingrid knew, was a silent way of saying thank you for her intervention earlier. She smiled slyly, leaning her head down on top of yours.
“I did it for you, you know. Not to be against you or aggravate you. There was no way I was letting you sit there and prevent yourself from letting her be there for you just because you were too worried and caught up in your own head. She loves you, she wants to be there for you. You love her, so allow her to be there for you, alright?” You smiled and nodded, though it quickly turned into a fairly dramatic frown at the mention of the woman you’d just had to say goodbye to.
“I miss her.”
In another country’s capital, a certain Spaniard was in the exact same position. She hadn’t moved from where she was when she was on the phone to you, and the smile on her face hadn’t shifted either. Just her luck that Irene walked into the sight, and Alexia had no choice but to sit up, slide one of her hotel slippers off her foot, and lightly launch it at the defender, who laughed at her for the dramatic Romeo and Juliet-esque scene she stepped into. 
When Alexia went to sleep that night, her cheeks aching from the sheer amount of time she spent smiling, it was to the sounds of her brainstorming of all the ways she could show off her pride when she had you back in Barcelona. 
But before then, you had a game to think about.
Part Two
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mcuamerica · 10 months ago
Text
Loving Flames | Part Two
Pairing: Eris x Reader
Summary: You leave Under the Mountain, going back to the Night Court... but there's a certain red head that still plagues your mind Requested by anon here.
Warnings: 18+ only, canon level violence, alludes to SA, Rhys is an asshole in this, a bit of angsty fluff and a lot of angst, slight claustrophobia, PTSD, (not proofread), let me know if anything was forgotten...
Word Count: 4k
Disclaimer: I do not own SJM’s characters, only the ones I create for the purpose of this story. This is a work of fiction. I do not give permission to repost my work on any other platform or medium. Please be respectful.
Dividers from @saradika
Part One
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You were in that room for the next 8 years, only going out when Amarantha commanded you to watch the tortures she knew you’d be tormented by the most. The faeries that had wings. Children. Families. You stood by Eris’s side, forced to watch as you clung to his arm. Your nails dug into his biceps so often when she was the most brutal that he had small scars there.
And his back, now. When he came back to the room from the healer that night, his entire back and chest was bandaged.
“You shouldn’t have done that.” He said to you when he found you with tears in your eyes, sitting on the bed.
“I couldn’t let her hurt you anymore. Not when it wasn’t your fault.” You said.
“She could still hurt you. She could command you out and force you to be whipped.” He said.
“I’d rather me than you.” You whispered, your knees tight to your chest.
“I wouldn’t.” He whispered. “I won’t be able to stand back and watch if she hurts you.” He said.
“Then kill her.” You simply stated, your eyes unfocused on the rug beneath the bed. “She can’t hurt you. Can’t have anyone else hurt you. Kill her and the threat ends.” You said.
Eris swore, ensuring the door was shut. He walked over to you, kneeling at your side. You felt him take your cheeks in his hands, forcing you to look at him. “You can’t say things like that out loud… you have to be careful.” He said. “I won’t let her hurt you… and I promise to get you out of this room one day.”
Eris wasn’t able to keep that promise. Not until Feyre came along. But, with the tensions between the Autumn and the Spring Court, he didn’t help her at all. And you were confined to your room for all of it other than Feyre’s trials.
When Amarantha finally died, thanks to Tamlin, you felt your tattoo dissolve against your skin. You nearly collapsed on the ground at the thought of leaving this gods-forsaken mountain. Of never seeing it again. Of never being trapped in a bedroom again, or any room. Of feeling the wind against your skin.
But that meant leaving Eris. Once Rhys told you when you would leave, you went to the room. Your prison and sanctuary for so long. “Eris.” You whispered.
He turned around from where he stood before the dresser, contemplating if he wanted to burn the clothing. “I thought you’d be gone by now.” He said.
“I can’t leave without saying goodbye.” You said, nervously playing with your fingers. “I’m going to miss you…” you whispered, silver lining your eyes.
Eris looked at you again, immediately before you. He took your cheeks in his hands. “Don’t do that.” He whispered. “Don’t lie.”
“I’m not lying. I don’t want to go to the Night Court if it means I can’t be with you.” You whispered. “You were the best thing about this Mountain. The only thing that kept me sane.” You said, tears falling from your eyes.
Eris, tears welled in his own eyes, shook his head. “You will go to the Night Court. And if the Autumn Court ever needs an emissary, you will always be welcome.” He whispered. “You will live a good, happy life. One you don’t want me in.” He said.
“But I do.” You whispered. “I need you in my life, Er.” You said louder.
“Then come find me once you’re settled. You’ll be welcomed. But if for one moment you resent what you went through down here, if you resent me for what I did, please… spend your time with your family. In your home.” Away from his family. Away from the cruelty you would endure under his father. Especially if he knew you were mates.
You sniffed, wrapping your arms around his neck as you buried your face in the crook of his neck. "Thank you. For everything." You whispered, holding onto him tight. He held onto you like his life depended on it. This may very be the last time Rhys lets him see you. And he would remember the moment for the rest of his life.
You finally pulled away, wiping at the tears in your eyes. "I'll come back for you, Eris Vanserra." You said to him, cupping his cheek.
"And I'll never forget you, Princess." He said.
You let out a watery laugh before letting go over him, taking a few steps back before you turned around and left to the upper levels of the mountain. Where you would go home with Rhys. You knew in your heart, in your soul, that you would see Eris again. And not just for courtly activities, but as friends. And maybe... if you found the strength.. more.
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You stayed in the Night Court, in Velaris, for four years. Meeting with Eris only for court purposes. And even then, Azriel, Cassian, or Rhys would be by your side, leading you away from them. No matter how much you tried to convince Rhys, and the others, that Eris never harmed you Under the Mountain, no one believed you. Expect for Mor, surprisingly. She was pretty easy to convince he did nothing to you, never laid a hand on you to harm you.
You were serving as the ever dotting Princess of the Night Court when the events with Feyre and her sisters happened. While each one of them tackled a challenge of her own, and ended up with their mates. Everyone was happy... You had a nephew and a family that adored you. And yet something was still missing.
You secretly wrote to Eris every week, it becoming your favorite time when one of his letter's would appear next on your nightstand. They became increasingly intimate, but never crossed the line of love.
One day, just a few months after Elain and Lucien's wedding/mating ceremony, Rhys said the Court would be meeting with Eris at the House of Wind. And while you were to stay in your old bedroom up there, you were not allowed to see him.
"Rhys, I'm not a child." You said, crossing your arms. "I'm the Princess of the Night Court. I should be there when you plot with our allies."
"Eris is not our ally... we have a tentative agreement with him." Rhys countered.
"That's the definition of an ally." You retorted. "And besides, I know him better than you all."
"You know him from the time he held you captive-"
"The time Amarantha held me captive," You corrected.
Rhys ignored you, continuing on, "You are biased."
You took a deep breath. "I will not be kept from this courts happenings because you believe me to be fragile. And I am certain Feyre will not agree with you locking me up in my room while you talk with the Heir to the Autumn Court." You said.
Rhys narrowed his eyes, but caved and said he would allow you to be present. Only if Azriel stayed by your side the entire night. You agreed, as Azriel was one of your closest friends and hadn't been as protective as the rest of them when it came to Eris. Maybe it's because his shadows detected you were telling the truth. Maybe they were keeping an eye on you all Under the Mountain for all those years. But either way, you didn't argue with having Azriel by your side.
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Taking a deep breath, you smoothed down the loose pants and tight fitting shirt you had on. Your flats matched the attire perfectly, incorporating Night Court black with Autumn Court red. You even did your makeup and hair a little bit more like the Autumn Court style. You hadn't seen Eris since the war with Hybern two years ago. While you kept contact with him, you were excited to see him.
You walked out to the main sitting area where the meeting would be held. Eris was standing there, in an Autumn green tunic and tight fitting pants. His red hair was tousled slightly, and shorter than the last time you saw it. Lucien was next to him, and the rest of your family was scattered around the room.
As Eris turned to you and gave you that smile you missed so much, a string snapped on your gut. Your eyes widened slightly as you felt the bond become even stronger than before. He must have noticed, because you saw his breath hitch.
“Eris,” you whispered, tears brimming your eyes. “It’s good to see you.” You blinked a few times, taking a deep breath to keep your composure. If you and Eris showed any affection here, Rhys would probably throw Eris off the balcony.
“You too, princess.” He said it just above a whisper.
The rest of the room looked between the two of you, all of the tension in the room because of you.
“Come on,” Azriel said, causing you to flinch at his un expected touch. “Let’s sit down.” He whispered and then walked you over to the couch. You kept your eyes on Eris, heart beating out of your chest. To the rest of them, they probably thought you were terrified to see him. Even if you had been completely fine with seeing him in the past.
Rhys walked in with Feyre, narrowing his eyes as he saw Eris staring at you. And you staring back. But you were sat next to Azriel, Eris on the other side of the room, so he let it go. “Okay, let’s talk about how you’re planning to kill your father.” He said.
“Thank you for your warm welcome into your home.” Eris said, voice dripping with sarcasm as he finally tore his eyes from you and looked to your brother.
“My home.” Nesta corrected. The House of Wind was her and Cassian’s now. Azriel was in the Town Home with Gywn and you stayed with Feyre and Rhys in the River House.
“You truly have a plan to kill your father?” Lucien said. Your father. As he recently learned Helion was his dad and not Beron.
“Yes, it’s been in the works for sometime. And Autumn is in a good position right now for a take over.” He said, leaning back in the single chair he was in.
Cauldron, he looked magnificent. He had bulked up more, his biceps threatening to tear the undershirt he wore. You wouldn’t put it past him to wear a tighter shirt to show off. Or was it to impress you? Either way, you couldn’t help but admire him. The way his hair fell onto his forehead, even though it should’ve been slicked back. How the pants fit his thighs just right. And gods, the way that smirk played on his tips as he talked about his plans. He was happy to kill his father. He was doing it for you, though you didn’t know it.
You barely heard a word of what they said as you watched Eris. Your eyes never left him. To the others, again, it looked as if you were scared. But as Azriel glanced between the two of you, and caught some stolen looks from Eris to you, he knew it wasn’t fear that was keeping you quiet. It was affection. You couldn’t think of what to say, so you sat quietly and listened. Or, Azriel thought you were listening. You were just admiring your mate.
Eris was your mate. And you couldn’t wrap your head around it. He must have known… and not told you because of the tensions between Autumn and a Night. But still, how long had he known? Did he know when you were Under the Mountain? Before? Is that the only reason he was kind to you?
Thoughts raked your brain as you spiraled down into your mind, and Azriel was the first to notice your short breathing. “(Y/N)?” Azriel whispered.
You looked up to him, finally breaking your stare from your mate. “Do you want to leave?” He asked.
You shook your head, leaning back in the love seat as you finally started to listen to what they had to say.
Eris would kill his father within the week. And he was requesting help from the Night Court to help him do it. It would be by poison, at an Autumn ball in three days. That each Night Court member would be at. And everyone would play their part.
So, as you listened to the plan, you couldn’t help but wonder what this would mean for you. Would Eris want you to be his mate if he was High Lord? He certainly didn’t say anything to you… maybe he was just being nice because mates shouldn’t hurt each other. Maybe he doesn’t want anything to do with you.
You blinked as everyone stood up, and Rhys shook Eris’s hand tentatively. He whispered a ‘if you betray us, you die’ that wasn’t even a whisper, everyone heard it. And then Rhys walked out. You glanced to Azriel as everyone else walked out besides Eris.
“Az… can you give us a moment?” You asked quietly. Azriel looked between you and Eris skeptically. You noticed as his ears perked and his eyes widened slightly as his shadows told him something.
He gave a slight nod. “I’ll be right outside.” He said before turning around to leave. Once he was out of the room, you ran over to Eris. You slung your arms around his neck as he pulled you close to his chest, his arms around your waist in an instant.
“I’ve missed you.” You whispered against his neck.
You felt him smile against the top of your head, pressing a soft kiss there. “Me too, princess.” He whispered.
“How long have you known?” You asked as you pulled away. “About the bond?” Your voice was shaking, your eyes hoping for a good explanation.
“Since before your mother died… your first introduction to the Courts with your father. It snapped for me the moment I saw you.” He said and cupped your cheek when you pulled away. “I didn’t want to tell you because I knew we couldn’t be together. Your father would never allow it. Your brother certainly wouldn’t.” He said.
“You didn’t think to tell me Under the Mountain?” You asked. You weren’t hurt about his secrecy, surprisingly. He had been protecting you for years. How could you be mad at him?
“I did… I wanted to so many times. But I didn’t want to force it on you down there. Or make it seem like I was trying to win you over. I just wanted you safe. And if Amarantha knew you were my mate, she might have done something to hurt you…” He said.
“I’m sorry I didn’t see it until now.” You said, leaning your forehead against his.
“I don’t want anyone to know. Not until my father is dead and he has no chance of using you against me.” Eris whispered.
“I want to accept it.” You whispered. “As soon as we’re both safe.” You told him, searching his eyes.
Neither of you had been remotely intimate. Hugging and sharing a bed was the extent to how you interacted Under the Mountain and after too. But now, you wanted to do everything with him. Wanted to kiss him, feel his warm lips on yours. You wanted him inside you, his flaming body against yours as you connected in a way no one else could. You wanted him to be your mate, officially. You wanted everything with him. Including children. A kingdom to rule, if he’d have you as his Lady.
Eris’s face at your words softened even more, tears lining his eyes. “Soon, I promise. But we will wait until after my father dies.” He said. “And when I am High Lord, we will accept it in whatever way you want. A large ceremony. A small one. You could give me a tree nut and I would be happy.” He said. “As long as I can be with you.”
“I don’t care. I just want to be your mate.” You told him.
“I’m glad we agree.”
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After that week, and after the ball where Eris's father "unexpectedly" died from a heart problem, Beron's powers were passed to Eris. And now, the heir of the Autumn Court was no more, instead, he was the High Lord of Autumn. Your mate.
While you wanted to immediately mate him, Eris wanted to establish his court before announcing his Lady of Autumn. So, you needed to distract yourself. And it happened that Tarquin invited you to the Summer Court to help strategize their rebuilding of the city. In reality, you were going for a vacation to relax. And distract yourself.
So, as you were packing your bag, Rhys knocked on the door.
You turned, giving your brother a small smile.
"You sure you want to leave?" He asked you.
"Yes, I can't wait to lay on the beach and relax for two weeks." You said happily.
"I'm sure it's been hard for you this past week," he said.
“Why?” You asked, zipping up your bag before turning towards him.
“Because… of having to be around Eris.” Rhys said, as if it were obvious. Though, while it was hard being around Eris, he thought it was because of how Eris hurt you. For you, it was hard because you wanted to tell the world about your mate. And you couldn’t.
“It wasn’t, not for the reason you’re implying.” You said. “I like spending time with Eris. And I’ve told you countless times before, he never hurt me.” You said.
“He locked you away in a room.” He said.
“Amarantha locked me away in a room.” You said.
“Because of Eris. Because he was trying to get you outside.”
“Because of her. Not Eris. He was being whipped and I made a decision to not let him suffer.”
“Why?” Rhys demanded. “Why make yourself a prisoner for him? Why not let him bleed? He’s not a good male.”
“He is!” You said. “You see what you want to, Rhys. You can assume all you want to but I spent 50 years with him. He never once touched me without asking. Never once crossed a line. And he didn’t even do it because he was scared of you. He did it because he respects me. And he cares for me.” You said.
“Why would he? When you’re the sister of his enemy? He wouldn’t do anything if it wasn’t for his benefit?” He asked.
You took a deep breath. “He’s not as selfish as he seems, Rhys.” You said, crossing your arms. “Why did you help Feyre when she was the betrothed to your enemy?” You asked.
“That’s different. Feyre is my mate.”
You paused for a moment, trying to choose your words carefully. “But no matter how cruel of a male you seemed to the outside, you were always kind to her… other than making her drink on faerie wine and parading her around at night.” You said. “Eris never did that to me…”
“He still kept you with him all those years. He could’ve given you away, let you stay with me. He could’ve-“
“He was protecting me.” You simply stated.
“Why?”
“Because I’m his mate!” You yelled. You knew you were screwed the moment the words left your mouth. Why did you just say that?
Rhys blinked. The only way he showed his shocked. “No, he isn’t.” He said.
“Yes he is. The bond snapped for me last week.” You said. “Before he was High Lord.”
“He’s tricked you. You can’t be his mate.” He said.
“My walls are stronger than yours, Rhysand. He couldn’t trick me if he wanted to. I am his mate. And he is mine. And he took care of me when no one else did.” You said, holding your head high. “As soon as I get back from Summer, I am going to Autumn and offering him food.” You said.
“And what? Leave your home? For that family? For him?” Rhys growled.
“For my mate. For the male that protected me and helped me and kept me sane for 50 years. For him, the male I love.” You said.
“No,” Rhys said, shaking his head. “He isn’t your mate. He must have tricked you… you won’t be going to Autumn.” He said.
You rose your eyebrows. “And how are you going to stop me?” You asked.
“I won’t let you leave.” He said.
“What are you going to do? Restrict me to the Night Court?” You asked. “You wouldn’t.”
“I would.”
“Why?”
“To protect you.”
“That’s not protection, Rhys. That’s imprisonment.” You said, searching his eyes. It occurred to you then that he might not be kidding. Rhys was notoriously protective of you. And he would go to far lengths to keep you from harm in his mind.
“You won’t leave this room, (Y/N), unless you promise you won’t go to Autumn.” He said.
“I won’t promise that. I’m not going to stay away from my mate.” You said. “And you can’t keep me here.”
“I will.” He said, taking a step out of your room.
“And what are you going to do? Block my path all night?” You asked, seething.
“No. There are wards around your room now. If you try to leave, you’ll see what happens.” He said.
Your eyes widened at the thought of being trapped in a room. “What?” You asked, your voice cracking.
“Unless you agree to never accept the bond with Eris, you’ll be in this room. And the wards won’t let anyone else but me in and out.” He said.
Your breathing started to quicken, walking towards the door but stopping right in front of it. “Rhys, do not lock me in this room.” You said, tears brimming your version.
“Do you promise to not go to Autumn? To not mate with Eris?” He asked.
“No.” You said quietly.
“You’re meant to be gone for two weeks. I’ll come back then to see if you’ve changed your mind.” He said.
“Rhys, please.” You begged, stepping forward again. You watched as he walked away, your breath catching in your throat.
“Rhys!” You yelled, taking a step to leave the room but coming in contact with a clear hard wall. “Rhys!” You sobbed, backing on the invisible door. You took a step back, trying to find your breath. “Rhysand!” You yelled again, only for your door to slam shut in front of you.
You fell to the floor, banging on the door. “Rhys!” You begged again, leaning your forehead against the. Your vision blurred, the walls closing in on you. Suddenly, you were back Under the Mountain. Trapped in that room with no wind or no windows. Eris healing from his wounds.
Your sobbed shook your body as you tried to breath. You closed your eyes as you sunk to the floor, pulling your knees to your chest.
"Rhysand!" You let out a scream, so primal and raw that your throat strained.
You continued shaking, sobbing, hyperventilating as you rock yourself back and forth. You tried to convince yourself you were safe. You weren't hurt. But you couldn't leave. Couldn't get out of this room if you tried. You couldn't see your mate.
Your sobs overtook your breaths as you lost focus, shaking at the feeling of desperation. You were trapped in this room. You couldn't get out. Wouldn't get out unless you promised something terrible to your brother. Your brother who you thought loved you. But someone who loved you wouldn't do this. They wouldn't trap you in a room after what happened Under the Mountain. What would Feyre do when she found out about this? Would Rhys keep you here longer than 2 weeks? Would you be trapped here forever.
The walls continued closing in on you as your mind spiraled deeper and deeper. When you had the strength to open your eyes, the room was dark. Your powers couldn't get you out, but they consumed you. The darkness wasn't welcomed though. It only made your breath quicken more. No light. No windows. No Eris.
How would you live like this?
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Part Three
A/N: GODS this was a good one to write... can you imagine what Eris is going to do when he finds out what Rhys did????
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delilahsturniolo · 2 months ago
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! ! sweetheart!matt helping out at barista!reader’s cafe when things get too overwhelming . . .
the café is chaos this morning. the line is out the door, people buzzing with impatience and caffeine cravings. you’re behind the counter, trying to keep up with the orders flying in from every direction. steam rises from the espresso machine, the sound of milk frothing filling the air as you work quickly to get everything just right.
you catch a glimpse of matt as he walks through the door, his usual grin already in place, even in the midst of the madness. he’s not in a rush, like the others. he’s not impatient. he just waits, leaning against the counter, watching you with that look in his eyes that always makes your heart skip a beat.
“hey, beautiful,” matt says, his voice cutting through the noise. it’s soft, just for you, and somehow it makes the chaos feel a little less overwhelming. you glance up, flashing him a quick smile. “i guess you’re the only one who’s not in a hurry today, huh?”
“someone has to keep you sane,” matt grins, his eyes twinkling with amusement. you feel your heart flutter at the words. you wish you could give him your full attention, but the morning rush is relentless. you hand off a latte to a customer, trying to move quickly, but the pressure is mounting. your nerves are starting to fray. you can feel the weight of the orders building up, the anxiety creeping in.
and then you hear him again, his voice a calm presence in the storm. “need some help?” matt asks, stepping closer to the counter. he’s looking at you with a small, teasing smile, but there’s something more there—something warm, something reassuring. you laugh, trying to hide the stress. “you don’t know how to make coffee, matt.”
“doesn’t matter,” he says, his smile widening. “i’ll figure it out, can’t be that hard, right?” you roll your eyes, but you can’t help the smile that tugs at your lips. before you can protest, he grabs an empty cup and starts scribbling something on it. “this one’s on me,” matt winks at playfully, sliding it toward you. “a special order.”
you look at the cup. your name is written in neat handwriting, but there’s more. a little heart drawn next to it. it’s the smallest thing, but it’s enough to melt the tension in your chest.“you’re ridiculous,” you mumble, the smile never leaving your face. “just trying to make you feel better, love,” he says, his eyes softening as he watches you. “one heart at a time.”
you lean over the counter for just a second, not caring about the chaos around you, and press a quick kiss to his cheek. it’s the only way you can steal a moment of peace before the next order comes in. “thanks,” you whisper, your heart full in a way that has nothing to do with caffeine. he grins, unaffected by the crowded café, like it’s just the two of you here. “anytime.”
the line is still long, and the orders keep coming, but somehow, with matt there, it feels a little easier to handle. you’re not alone in the rush, and maybe, just maybe, you don’t mind the chaos as much when he’s around.
© delilahsturniolo do not copy, re use, or modify any of my works.
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a/n 💌: omg i missed these two :( anywhooo i’m posting the next fic for the writing marathon later i’m in such a writey mood
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n0tamused · 2 months ago
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Hello (  ̄▽ ̄) CONGRATS!!!(*^▽^)/★*☆♪
Kdbskannsa how did i not see that you had an event going ○▽○???¿¿
But if you're still taking requests, can i see what you'd do for the last kiss and angst promt #12 with Sunday, Diluc and Al haitham?
A/n: Heyy pookie! So happy to see you here, thank you for stopping by <3 I had to do this request asap bc I had really nice ideas for it. I really hope you like this! Lemme know what you think.
Prompts: 15.Last kiss + 12.“You’re the one thing keeping me sane right now.”
Contents: Sunday, Diluc, Al-Haitham x Reader(separate), angst, gn reader
Words: 368(Sunday), 441(Diluc), 462(Al-Haitham)
Ko-Fi |  1.5K followers event
₊˚⊹Sunday
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“Do you have to leave..?” 
Your words came soft and hushed, drowned out by the whirring and the loud, raining noise of a dozen glowing panels and screens. Sunday stood before you, clad in robes you hardly recognized him in, wearing the most honest and broken expression you saw on him. 
You knew he couldn’t stay, understood the reasons why, yet you hoped against hope that something would change, that this nightmare would loosen its hold on you. Why couldn’t you go with him?
Sunday’s lips tighten and his shoulders go slack, his gaze falling to the ground in shame. The alley is not as dark as he wished it to be. The moment was drawing to an end, he wished it wouldn’t end. He wished things were different. He wished for many things.
“Yes..” he whispered, but even that felt too loud for his ears. Nothing pained him more but the feeling of being the one to draw the blade of words through your heart. It reeked of betrayal. Another one, commited by his hand. You were the only one keeping him sane throughout all the years he knew you, but not it all felt like another spiraling staircase down. 
Your head fell down and slowly you inched towards him, and he accepted you in his embrace without a question. His hand feels heavy, but far away, like a distant dream. “I’m sorry..” he whispered with a heavy heart, his arms circling around you and you hugged him tighter as if that would keep him near. 
“I’m sorry..” he whispered again, into your hair, holding you close as tears welled in his eyes. “I’m sorry..” his words held a plea, silently begging for time to stand still, but fate would never be so kind.
In a hopeless, clumsy way of comfort, a desperate way, you pulled back just enough to raise your head and look at him, both of you staring at each other with tear stained cheeks. His lips moved to utter another apology but he was cut short by your lips on his. He could sense the faint hint of salt on your lips, he held his breath and held you. Perhaps for the last time. 
₊˚⊹Diluc
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“Death awaits you past that door” you told him as he turned to face away from you, a heavy bag wishing to pull his shoulder down, but just as he was in the midst of your prior argument, he stood unmoving and stiff as rock.  “Do you really crave it so much that you’d throw yourself into it?” your tone dropped into a concoction of anger and gnawing sadness. There was an underlying question, and you knew that he heard it too: do you crave a lonely death more than a life with me?
Diluc sighed, turning to face you once more, his eyes deep braziers of angry fire. Tears welled up in your eyes as his silence prolonged, unyielding to your silent plea. He looked angry at the world, at everyone, at you. 
“Why..” you croaked, plucking up what sanity you had left to hold your tone from shaking, biting back the bitter tears.
“I have to..”
“You.. You are the only person keeping me sane right now.. Do you think you’re the only one that suffered through this? I am trying to help you, yet you throw all my efforts away, you pushed everyone away! Diluc… Can’t you see reason?” you stepped closer in a bold measure of hoping to reach him, but stopping half way across the room. 
“You suffered.. that is further reason why I must go” he replied, tone firm but finally showing cracks. The smallest of shifts that gave you an inkling of hope you’re getting to him. 
“Please..” whispering you close the distance, grabbing his gloved wrist and pulling it to your cheek, pulling all your walls down and being desperate in one last attempt to make him stay. Stay, make him stay, please stay.
His hand presses against your cheek, warm and inviting. But his eyes harden, glistening with unshed anger and tears and a lake of regret.
“..No..” he shook his head, his nose brushing against yours, and you let your tears fall. He has fortified his walls while you’ve torn yours down.
“I can’t..” he added, his warm breath fanning against your cheek before he kissed your forehead. “I’m sorry… I will write to you, as often as I can.. I promise you. You will be safe here”.
You couldn’t look at him, but couldn’t turn away from him either, this is the last time you’ll see him. He was marching towards revenge, towards his death. 
His vision sat heavy in your palm, and with what little forgiveness you had in that moment you leaned in and sought out his lips. His breath hitched, but he granted you one last kiss.
₊˚⊹Al-Haitham
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“Al-Haitham..?” you sigh as you look up at him, his eyes looking more puzzled than you’ve ever seen. Frustration to understand his own puzzlement frustrated him further, casting him in a fae circle of frustration and not understanding. He opened his mouth to say something but then closed it when he found nothing.
“I will be back… some day..” you said slowly, hoping to ease the tension within him. You knew he was not angry with you, he wouldn’t be even if this was of your own doing. “I will write to you. The place is known for their messenger birds, fastest in all the lands too” you said with a dry chuckle, but that fleeting and feigned joy faded all too quickly, leaving you feeling more sorry than before. 
Al-Haitham sighed, his eyes falling shut for once, and his chin dipped down. “...I understand” he spoke before looking up at you again, his gaze having softened by then. “This was an unavoidable outcome.. You were the only thing keeping me sane here” he added, sounding defeated.
You couldn’t help your heart from cracking at the sight. The man everyone perceived as so stoic and steadfast, stubborn as a mule, even rude - he looked nothing like that now. He looked soft and lost and distant all at once. 
“Oh… Al-Haitham..” you cooed, softly and quietly, moving closer to him as your hand reached out to caress his upper arm. He looked at your hand, like a big wounded animal. “I am not going away forever.. And hey, maybe we can visit one another some time too.. I know you don’t get too much vacation time, but who says it's not doable?” 
He sighs again and looks up at your eyes. He doesn’t entertain your attempt at a hopeful outlook, he can’t share it, he doesn’t know how to.
“Allow me to see you off tomorrow” it was a simple request, but it weighed more than a bleeding heart.
“Of course..” you told him, your small smile tugging at your lips as you wondered how you’d live without Sumeru, without him. It seems so daunting, a nightmare about to come true. But you’d overcome it if it meant seeing him in the future.
You notice Al-Haitham’s eyes flickering to your lips, then back up at your eyes, a mellow gaze asking your permission, mercy. As your hand climbed up to his shoulder, his hand fell at your hip and he leaned down to kiss your lips, slowly. He lingers and doesn’t move, doesn’t breathe, perhaps hoping against hope that this moment’s time wouldn’t move, that it would stay frozen. But he knows he’ll see you off tomorrow, with words he finds hard to say lodged in his throat and in want of another kiss. 
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Ⓒ n0tamused/jarttavia_. Do not repost, translate, edit, and/or copy any of my works. Likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated.
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rubyuji · 1 year ago
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Treat (Kim Mingyu) ୧ ‧₊˚ 🍰 ⋅ ☆
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“So Y/n, I see you noticed the cute baker in the kitchen. Any plans on getting to know him?” °❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・
Genre: Fluff
AU: University!au
Pairing: Culinary Student!Baker!Mingyu x Medical Student!reader
Warnings: None just tooth-rotting fluff
Synopsis: An average medical student getting by who meets the cute baker from the small bakery across the street in front of her university.
Note: This used to be a TXT fic but I edited it and now it’s a Mingyu fic because I have a bunch of wips that I’m dying to finish. Here’s something for me to post at least, happy reading! As always, don’t forget to like + reblog as a way to support.
WC: 5.4k
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Being a medical student was a pain in the ass and was way worse than how people would describe it, it cost money, time as well as your mental and emotional stability. It’s not like anyone would want to study the anatomy of a human in a dull lecture hall with like forty other people, or know how a whiff of a cigarette could even kill you.
Yet here you were, already going the works of med school, and there was no turning back from it all, because although you were passionate, you still had a limit to how much you could take, even if you had always dreamed of becoming a pediatrician to keep you motivated.
“Oh my God Jihyo, I don’t think I’m ready to take this exam. I’m probably going to flunk this semester and I’ll be stuck as a receptionist in scrubs at a local clinic if I don’t get my head straight” you say tearfully.
Your friend Jihyo chuckled as she patted your back comfortingly, assuring you that you would do just fine and that you had already done enough studying the past few days. You weren’t stupid, just dramatic.
“You’ll be fine Y/n, don’t worry about it otherwise you will start to feel even worse. You’ve studied like crazy so it would be insane if you didn’t do so well, like you always do” she smiled softly in reply.
You shoot Jihyo a weak smile back and sigh once again, at least one of your best friends kept you somewhat sane, you couldn’t say the same for your appearance though. With heavy eyebags and eyes that looked as hollow as your soul, anyone would probably mistake you for a psych ward patient if you were caught walking around by yourself.
“Thanks, and good luck to us once we step into the exam hall. We’re gonna need it, me especially” you sigh after gathering the rest of the materials you’ll need for the exam itself.
When an hour passed, the exam completely drained you of all the life you had left. You stepped out of the exam hall with Jihyo groggily. You just wanted to go home and sleep all your problems away, but if you were already struggling as a freshman, how much more would you be in the future knowing you still had thirteen more years to go?
“Is it too late to change careers and become a full-time sugar baby or stripper?” You ask your friend and roommate, Rosé, who was just as drained as you were.
“I don’t think so. Let’s go on that sugar baby website” she chimed back in exhaustion. Chungha laughed at you both on the couch before setting down a pizza on the coffee table in front of you, along with a few drinks and a huge bottle of coke.
“Cheer up ladies, we’ll get through all of this before you know it. Now eat up, the food’s getting cold” Chungha hissed.
You and Rosé helped yourselves without another word, the three of you scarfing down all the food and complaining about midterms just to get your system going.
In the middle of the conversation, Rosé had suddenly brought up the bakery that just opened across the university.
“By the way, a new bakery opened up across the street from our school, do you guys wanna try and visit tomorrow?” She chirped.
You guys didn’t have anything to lose, so you and Chungha agreed before setting a certain time to meet after your last exam. That was when you realized it was getting late so you all cleaned up and started to get ready for bed.
“Goodnight you two! Good luck as well, we’ll need it for our last set of exams” You bid your roommates goodnight as you retreat into your room.
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“Whew! That was exhausting, I’m glad everything is over with because chemistry should be the least of my problems for now” you cheered.
Rosé groans and runs a hand through her hair in frustration. Chungha was late, and it was because her boyfriend Jungkook wanted some alone time with her.
“God if Chungha doesn’t come in like five minutes I’m gonna assume they need their ‘THEM’ time” she huffs. You laugh and just grab Rosé while giving Jihyo a call. If Chungha getting it, at least someone else can take her place, for now, her boyfriend probably needs a lot of relief.
“Jihyo can come, she’ll be there in like ten. For now, we should order in advance” you say, as you both enter the bakery.
The interior was very cute and minimal, everything was white marble, be it the racks and tables with checkered flooring. On the ceiling hung two crystal chandeliers that reflected light causing a blur of rainbows to scatter across the room.
“Wow you were right, this place is adorable Rosie! Let’s go order drinks and pick our bread” you squeal and drag her over.
Behind the register, you see a guy with black hair and another guy with light brown hair bickering about something.
“Jeonghan, I swear to fucking God if you—“ the black-haired male was cut off after seeing you and Rosé walking over.
“Go serve the customers first, I’ll be waiting in the back” The brunette smirked, and retreated into the kitchen behind the counter.
At the counter, the guy greets you with a charming smile, just about charming enough to get you flustered, but you didn’t want to look like a mess right now so you browsed the menu behind him.
“Hi! Welcome to Carat Cravings! What can I get you two today?” You read his nametag and saw that he was named Seungcheol. ‘Cute’ you say to yourself and smile back at him.
“Can we get one fruit and egg tart with a margarita pizza for here, please? And for the drinks one caramel macchiato and one americano, both iced with a fruit ade please” Seungcheol punches your orders into the register and looks up at you both again.
“Will that be all?” He asks, and you nod as you hand him your card. Rosé looked at you almost frazzled and was about to refuse your offer to pay, but then noticed that you had caught wind of another guy from behind in the kitchen.
As Seungcheol hands you your card back, you and Rosé make your way to a table near the window. “So Y/n, I see you noticed the cute baker in the kitchen. Any plans on getting to know him?” She giggled softly.
You looked at her with a glare and shook your head furiously. No, you weren’t the kind of person to date because you always prioritized your studies more than anything, but you had to admit, the baker was just so cute.
He was tall and had beautiful sunkissed skin with jet black hair and had a face that almost resembled a puppy, and maybe you also couldn’t help but notice that he had nice hands that kneaded the dough so well. You’d imagine what his hands would do if they were—
“Y/n! Hi Rosie!” Your thoughts were cut short as Jihyo entered the bakery and called over to you both excitedly. She was beaming as you made space for her to sit beside you.
“Hi Jihyo, you look happy for someone who came out of our hour-long exam” Rosé eyed her suspiciously. Jihyo only laughed and waved off what she said while staring both of you down.
“My sister called right after and said the hospital she’s working at is accepting part-timers! I just came here feeling happy about it” she says excitedly.
You and Rosé were shocked but also happy for her knowing that having a sister who worked at a hospital had its perks too. Jihyo was just one of the lucky ones, but everyone starts somewhere.
“Sorry to interrupt ladies but here are your orders! If you need anything else you can just call for me or the other guy behind the counter, the one with light brown hair” Seungcheol placed your orders on the table and the three of you thanked him politely.
When Seungcheol had finally walked out of earshot, Jihyo had lowered her voice into a whisper. “This bakery is cute but oh my god, I never expected the workers to be cute as well,” she says in a giddy tone.
You laugh at her and take a piece of the pizza while sipping on your caramel macchiato, Jihyo still ogling at Seungcheol as Rosé gives her a disgusted look.
“Come on you two, what happened to putting our studies first? If you date during your freshman year you are going to end up as a receptionist in scrubs you hear me” Rosé says sarcastically, but you were too busy staring at the baker who just came out of the kitchen.
He was talking to the two other males behind the counter and sighed. That was when you noticed that he had eyed you up and down too before looking away.
“Y/n? Hello? What the fuck, oh wait it’s that baker” Rosé says with a huff. Jihyo giggles and shushes her, noticing how flustered you became all of a sudden.
The two knew you were never one to talk about guys or wanted to date since high school, so seeing you all worked up over someone you didn’t know would only make teasing you even worse.
“New motivation to go to class every day? I know you have evening classes, so maybe I could ask them what time they close” Jihyo says with a smirk.
“Oh shut up, the baker is just some stupid eye candy you know. I can’t let that go to waste” you try to brush it off, but in reality, you two were practically checking each other out without your friends noticing.
On the other hand, Mingyu also seems to have noticed you and how you stared at him from across the room. Opting to check you out too because you didn’t look that bad either, and because he needed a break from being in the kitchen since the morning.
“Mingyu? Are you alright? Don’t tell me you’re checking out that girl over there with her friends, I was planning to get first dibs because she looked the most interesting” Jeonghan whined.
Seungcheol smacked him on the back of his head and went to tidy whatever was on the counter until a few more customers came in, but then he turned towards the two.
“I mean, you’re not wrong. She looks really pretty, but Mingyu seems to put her on edge. They barely even know each other, but you can feel the tension between them, just go talk to her Gyu” the older male grins.
Mingyu rolls his eyes at the two and notices that Jun has also come out from the back to get a breather. Business was a bit slow today, but they did just open so there was no harm in being a bit laid back.
“Are you guys talking about the group of girls over there? We just opened and you’re already ogling at our customers, be more professional” Jun says nonchalantly.
“Well I need a girlfriend, the girls in my major aren’t all that so ogling at the bakery respectfully would seem better than asking out a girl who wouldn’t know how to interact with me” Jeonghan rolls his eyes and drags Jun back to the kitchen where he’ll be taking over for Mingyu, whilst Wonwoo takes his place at the front.
In the midst of this all happening, you notice the other boys by the counter and rip your eyes off Mingyu to focus on what Jihyo and Rosé are talking about.
“The food is so good here! I can’t believe they just opened, I want to gatekeep this place forever” Jihyo gushed. Rosé nodded in agreement and turned to you, to which you replied with a confused expression.
“Well, we are done. How about we head home so we have more time to relax? I’m sorry if I’m rushing, but I have a show to catch up on” Rosé blabbered. You laugh at her and nod as you all collect your things.
“See you tomorrow Jihyo! I’ll call you” You smile and wave as the three of you part ways, you and Rosé going home together since you were both roommates.
“Alright! Stay safe you two!” Jihyo then turned and walked towards her apartment, which was about two blocks from the bakery itself.
At home, as you’re studying on the living room floor, you notice Chungha sitting on the couch behind you. “I heard from Rosie that the pastry maker from the new bakery caught your eye” she joked.
You roll your eyes and shake your head at the accusation, is it not normal to ogle at people once in a while? And how did word travel so fast?
“Trust me, he’s just eye candy. It’s nothing personal” you sigh, whilst highlighting a sentence in your book. Chungha huffs and takes a sip from her mug, smirking at you.
“I doubt it, you’re such a nerd Y/n. You already work your ass off at school so why not live a little and date? Come on, this guy is probably just as studious as you are, considering he works at a bakery with his friends” she says matter-of-factly.
“So working at a bakery that he started with his friends makes him a nerd like me? I’m so impressed Chungha, you should’ve taken criminology, to be completely honest,” you reply sarcastically, which earned you a slap on the back of the head.
“Come on, if you’re going by tomorrow at least talk to him. I mean, what do you have to lose? You’re smart, pretty and you’re kind. Not to mention, wasn’t he also checking you out?” You felt your face grow hot, guess you weren’t that slick after all if Rosé noticed it too.
Before you could retaliate, the two of you heard the soft pattering of feet and a laugh coming from the hallway. It was Rosé, and it seemed like she’d overheard your conversation through the paper-thin walls of the apartment.
“Y/n! You should go see him! It’ll do you good I promise” she squealed. Chungha laughed and nodded along with her, it seemed like your roommates were some of the most insufferable people in the entire world.
“If I do it will you guys finally leave me alone?” You say weakly. The other two nodded eagerly with wide eyes and you mentally facepalm.
If a simple conversation was gonna get them off your tail, then so be it. It’ll be quick and it’s not like it’ll be a routine part of your day.
The next morning, you couldn’t be any more wrong. You woke up earlier than you should’ve for your first class of the day, and as you fixed yourself in the mirror, you thought about the baker and why you ended up just mentally thanking your friends for the challenge.
“Good morning Y/n, you seem chipper this morning” Rosé greets you from the kitchen. You smile shyly at her and look away, which gives off the impression that you maybe were anticipating the morning more than you thought, compared to the night before.
“Looking forward to talking to him now? Seems like a culinary major so maybe you’ll find him easier than you’d think” she continues.
“Yeah, yeah maybe I am a bit excited since he is cute. I bet he has a girlfriend though and I’ll prove you guys wrong, maybe his eyes just wandered” you laugh while Rosé only gives you a smirk and a scoff.
“When you start dating this guy, I bet you’ll thank us for setting you up like this. Studies can always come second, and who said you can’t multitask?” you bid your goodbye and race to the elevator of your apartment building, sighing from the intense teasing, but before the elevator doors could close, a voice had called over from the end of the hallway.
“Hey! Wait up!” You quickly press the open door button and lo and behold, there stood the exact baker you and Rosé were just talking about this morning, except he was in a chef outfit. ‘Maybe she was right’ you chuckle.
“Thanks for that— Wait, you were with your friends at the bakery yesterday” The tall male recognized you as you nodded back and gave him a friendly smile.
“I’m surprised you even remember me, but I’m even more shocked that you live in the same apartment building” you reply with a laugh. Mingyu scratches the back of his neck awkwardly and nods.
“You guys were one of our first customers, so it’s honestly hard to forget since it’s kind of special in a way” The elevator doors open and the two of you walk out, still engaged in a conversation.
“Oh before we do part ways, I’m Y/n! I had plans to head to the bakery later but it seems like your shift won’t start ‘till the afternoon it seems” you say cheekily.
“I’m Mingyu, it’s nice to meet you. Don’t worry, I only have one morning class before the others take over for the night, so you will be seeing me right after” Mingyu chuckles. Your face heats up so you immediately bid the male goodbye and walk over to your bus.
Microbiology was probably one of the worst classes to ever have in the morning, so a coffee fix for the rest of the day was just what you needed. You offer to buy your other friend Nayeon one too since you needed someone to go with you, just to lessen the effects of being around Mingyu at least.
“I’m starting to get sick of studying fungi and bacteria all day, can you believe every fucking surface we wipe a swab on has some form of disease” you grimace.
The bell of the bakery chimes and you already see a familiar head of brown hair behind the register. “Hi welcome to Carat Cravings! What can I get you guys today?” It was still fairly early in the morning, so you guessed that the ones working the morning hours mostly had evening classes just like you.
“One americano and one caramel machiatto, both iced. While we’ll get a breakfast platter please” Jeonghan punches in the order and you hand him your card, once again, to pay. At that exact moment, Mingyu had come out of the kitchen to greet you.
“Wait you know her?” Jeonghan suddenly asks. Mingyu nods and you greet him back shyly, you two had only just met by chance at the elevator of your apartment building.
“She lives in the same building, anyways Y/n this is Jeonghan. Since you’ll be coming here more often, I assume, then you should get to know us” he grins back at you. Jeonghan gave you both puzzled looks but you nodded in reply, a grin also plastered onto your face.
“Go ahead and find a seat then, your orders will be out in a few” You and Nayeon make your way to a window seat in the corner and take out a few of your notebooks just to go over what was discussed in your lecture.
You are writing down another important note on your iPad when you hear the clinking of glasses and see another blonde beside your table, you guessed this was the other guy named Jun.
“Here you are, let us know how you feel about the food before you go by the way! Also here’s something from Mingyu that he wanted me to give you” he handed you a note and you looked at him confused, then looked over at the counter where you noticed the man as he ran back into the kitchen.
Jun walks away as you open the note, your friend Nayeon is confused as as you are. “Oh—? It’s his uh number?” You say in a flustered manner. ‘Let’s get closer! Here’s my number since I’m too shy to give it to you :)’ it said.
“Aww! Y/n that’s so cute!” Nayeon squeals as you look away shyly to bring out your phone to type in his number. “Hey, he’s just being friendly don’t be like that!” You deny it, but Nayeon wouldn’t let up.
After that day, Mingyu had pretty much become a routine part of your life, except that one phone call after a few weeks of talking to each other.
“Y/n? I didn’t expect you today since you seemed so busy, how was class?” Mingyu chuckles from the other line. You smile at his words before replying, no matter how busy, Mingyu always manages to ask you about your day.
“Well it was pretty ok I guess, I’m just sad I couldn’t stop by the bakery today because it rained too” you reply sadly. You hear the line go silent and hear a few muffled jeers and laughs in the background. ‘Cute’ you thought.
“Don’t mind the guys. Since you called, I wanted to know if you were free this weekend? Jun’s taking over for me” Mingyu asks.
“I am actually! I don’t have anything planned right now. What do you have in mind?” You reply a little too enthusiastically. You hear another chuckle on the other line and cover your mouth in embarrassment.
“You’re so cute, let’s go to a café! I don’t want us to feel so lost since it’s our first time hanging out personally” Mingyu smiled on the other line before hearing Wonwoo gag from behind him. You blush at Mingyu’s comment and try to contain the urge to scream.
“Alright then, text me the time and I’ll put it into my schedule for the week. Bye, Mingyu! Good luck at work!” The other members all smirked at Mingyu and he bid you goodbye as well, this time with reddened ears.
The taller male then turns to his friends who go back to cleaning up before they close the bakery soon. “Yeah, it’s nothing. I just made a friend I swear, besides, she lives in our apartment building so it’ll be weird if I didn’t at least make acquaintances with her” he tries to convince them.
“Yeah right, I’d ask my cute neighbor out on a date if I were you too. Cut the bullshit Gyu, we know you like her” Wonwoo says while laughing.
Mingyu looks away, they definitely weren’t wrong and even though he did have dreams of becoming a top pastry chef one day, he also couldn’t risk not seeing you again.
“It’s always studies first, but I overheard she’s also one of the top students in her major. You bagged the beauty and brains Gyu!” Seungcheol exclaims.
Jeonghan looks at his friend in confusion as to how he even knew this information, but the older only chuckles in response.
“I got this information from Jihoon just so you know, he’s pretty close to her other friend Jihyo I think” Seungcheol concludes. Mingyu sighed and went to fix the pastry display, he was in for a rough week he supposed.
On your end, your two roommates had also overheard the conversation and squealed just as you ended the call. “He asked you out on a date?! Y/n that’s wonderful!” Rosé screams, immediately engulfing you in a bear hug.
“Guys it’s just a regular hang out between friends! He’s just our, cute, neighbor and baker you know” you stifle out. Chungha gives you a look of disapproval and flicks your forehead.
“Yeah, yeah. We all know you two are whipped for each other and it’s been two weeks since they opened up, you two will probably make it official before you even start the second date!” She huffs out. You frown, were you really in denial? You wouldn’t know for sure.
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The date (if you could even call it that), came by faster than you could blink and now here you were, standing in front of the mirror, with your makeup done and in a pretty white dress with matching white ballet flats.
“Why do you look so dolled up? It’s a friendly date isn’t it” Rosé teases. You turn to her and see her leaning against the doorframe, a soft smile on her face.
“I just wanted to look presentable you know” you squeak out, knowing you were caught red-handed. It was autumn so you had to take your last chance to at least wear something pretty before layering everything.
“Anyways, tell me the details once you’re back! And take A LOT, and I mean a lot, of pictures with him ok? You two look cute together” Rosé runs away before you can reprimand her, and you suddenly hear your phone ping.
“Y/n! Someone’s at the door for you!” Chungha calls out lovingly. You stiffen, was it necessary for your roommate to act embarrassing at the most inconvenient time? You walk out of your room and make eye contact with Mingyu from the hallway.
Mingyu’s eyes widen at your form, the two of you were wearing matching outfits, both white and looking like you had dressed for the spring instead of the cold autumn weather.
“So?—“ Chungha was cut short as you sprinted and grabbed Mingyu’s hand, leading him down the hallway hurriedly with a laugh.
“I’m sorry, my roommates can be a handful sometimes. Now, where are we going?” You grin. Mingyu’s ears redden after realizing your hands were still intertwined, but you didn’t seem that bothered so he led you to his car that was parked in the basement.
“Are you planning to kill me?” You joke. Mingyu shakes his head and you laugh. “No, no! Just taking you to my car since the café is in the uptown part of the city. It’s a bit far but I guarantee you’ll like it” he replies in a flustered voice.
“Are you sure you’re not some murderer plotting my demise and you’re secretly taking me to your getaway house with your actual girlfriend” you blurt out. He looks at you in confusion and now it was his turn to laugh.
“I don’t think I’d be here then if I had a girlfriend, trust me, I’m more into my studies and passion than you think. So, consider yourself a special girl” Mingyu unintentionally flirts. You hit his shoulder out of habit, but he didn’t seem to mind either as he continued to laugh at you.
“Why’d you ask me out anyway? My other friends are way prettier and way more interesting than me, and don’t think I’m saying that out of pity, I’m just confused since I’ve always had my head buried in books as well” you admit shamefully.
“In all honesty, I just felt an instant connection with you, call it whatever but I’ve never felt like this with someone before” The street lights illuminate his face and you thank the gods above that he can’t see your flushed face in the dimness of the light.
“Oh, we’re here by the way. Let me park and don’t get out until I open the door for you” Mingyu parks the car at a spot in front of a very comfy but also expensive-looking café, before getting out of the driver’s seat to open your end.
You get out and thank him bashfully, the two of you heading inside. It didn’t seem too crowded for a weekend, which relieved you a bit since the ambiance was much more peaceful this way.
“Good afternoon! Welcome to Nabi’s, what can I get you two today?” The cashier smiles. You turn to Mingyu, and he looks at you with another grin, immediately ordering since you aren’t all that familiar with the place.
The cashier punches it in and Mingyu pays for everything, leaving you flustered for the umpteenth time that day. ‘What a gentleman, and he doesn’t have a girlfriend?’ You tell yourself.
“Your orders will be out shortly, you can take a seat and we’ll bring it right over. Have a good one, and here’s your change sir” Mingyu gladly takes his card and leads you to the second floor of the café.
Upon stepping into the seating area, you were immediately greeted with a beautiful view of the city. “Mingyu this is amazing!” You run over to the seat next to the window, and this causes Mingyu’s heart to race. How could you be so endearing even in the smallest aspect?
“It’s nothing, it’s a place I like to go to when I want to be alone, but I brought you here because it’s special to me” he admits while sitting down in front of you.
“Thank you honestly, I feel very special now that I’ve earned enough trust from Kim Mingyu to be able to go to one of his favorite places” You giggle, your stomach full of butterflies from how he treated you.
“Well, I did want to say this and I’m afraid it might be too early, but here it goes” You look at him curiously and stay quiet so you can listen to him better. You were always one to make anyone feel heard and comfortable.
“I like you Y/n, as if it isn’t obvious enough. The day I saw you with your friends at the bakery, something just stood out to me about you, and after getting to know you, it made you a hundred times more attractive to me. It might be a bit early but I wanted to let you know that I’d be willing to wait for you as long as you let me” Mingyu says wholeheartedly.
You were shocked, you liked Mingyu just as much as he did you, but his confession and sincerity were so out of the blue. Was this guy sure about not having a girlfriend?
“Mingyu, I don’t know what to say. I like you too! At first, I was pretty in denial about my feelings since I didn’t want to end up as a receptionist in scrubs and only really stuck to my studies, but you opened up my heart in a way. No need to wait, I’m willing to be your girlfriend” you confess as well.
You stare at Mingyu and notice his ears turn red while a huge smile starts to make its way onto his face. “You don’t understand how happy you make me Y/n, I won’t disappoint you” he holds your hand from across the table.
The rest of the day went by in a blur, Mingyu and you talking for hours on end about everything you missed out on during the first few weeks of getting to know each other, what you guys had in common, and even planning out the second date.
Mingyu and you walk through the basement of your apartment together as he takes you home for the night, dreamy smiles on both your faces and hands intertwined with each other’s. It felt magical almost that you’d even met this guy, he came straight out of a storybook.
“I had so much fun today, thank you Mingyu. I’m so happy,” you say in the elevator. Mingyu engulfs you in a hug and nuzzles his face against the crown of your head, you two did seem like a lovesick couple already.
“Thank you for today as well Y/n, I couldn’t have asked for anything better. Now let’s take you home so you can rest well, even if I don’t want to let you go just yet” he says cheekily.
The elevator dings and you realize that you are already on your floor. You start to feel sad but Mingyu still walks you over to your apartment down the hall, the two of you constantly exchanging glances as you get to your door slowly.
“Goodnight Mingyu! Thank you again, boyfriend, I’ll see you tomorrow at the bakery after class?” You quip. Mingyu nods and you kiss him on the cheek before typing in your door combination.
“Boyfriend huh? Goodnight then Y/n, sleep tight love. I don’t want to let you go just yet” he pouts. You laugh again and give him one last peck, this time on his lips, which causes his eyes to widen again.
“You’ll see me tomorrow! Now go rest up sleepyhead, you always work so hard” After you finish that sentence, you open the door and bid him one last goodbye before he walks away, and you walk into your apartment.
Once the door is closed, you hear the shrieks of your roommates and massage your temples. You were going to be in for it tonight, but at least you finally had the man of your dreams.
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© rubyuji 2024’ -. no part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any manner without the permission from the publisher.
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banzaitaka · 7 months ago
Note
Hello! I was wondering if you could write some fluff for Dr stone please?
Could you write about Ryusui and Tsukasa ( separately) making reader ( gn please?) Cry of worry for them?
They are both a bit crazy, tsukasa fighting anything and Ryusui just diving in any adventure would make me worried sick, specially if they became stone again or something.
I hope I made sense! Thank you!!
[I forgot you said “fluff“, oops. I dunno how to make that fluffy, I‘m sorry edfgieoigj These are just the moments (Y/N) is worrying. So hurt, no comfortish (there is some comfort from other characters). I wanted to focus on the turmoil itself, so for the comfort you can imagine anything fitting with the storyline]
Characters: Tsukasa Shishio, Ryusui Nanami
No pronouns, gendered terms or description of body used for reader.
Spoilers for season 2 & Special 2 - Ryusui
Dr. Stone_Masterlist
Worrisome
Tsukasa Shishio
You didn’t move from your seat near the cave. You couldn’t. The sheer amount of stress made your body shut down as a defense mechanism. You felt dizzy. Your mind was numb. The situation was just so utterly unbelievable. There was just no way. Just when everything started to light up.
Mirai was sitting besides you, letting you hold her to your side as she cried, her voice being muffled by your clothes.
After years, Mirai finally woke up. After months, the Empire and Kingdom of Science were at peace. There was no reason to fear the other party anymore. And how long did that last? Hours? Minutes?
Tsukasa’s wound was fatal, so Senku decided to essentially kill him himself by freezing him up like leftovers. To save him, sure. But he is dead. Tsukasa, your boyfriend, is dead. For however long, he wouldn’t be there. Wouldn’t be there to hold you, to assure you, make new memories with his sister he has missed so much for forever.
You were scared. So scared. What if Senku’s plan didn’t work? What if everything went downhill from here on out? What if Homura and Hyoga escaped and went on a killing spree?
It was all so scary to think about, you nearly went crazy. Mirai was the only thing keeping you sane, she didn’t know you, but she knew how important you were to her brother. And thus you were important to her too. And the same the other way around.
You pulled her a little closer and rubbed her shoulder, as you were at a loss for words to comfort her. That was when Senku emerged from the cave where it happened. His expression wasn’t much different from yours, but there was a certain determination twinkling in his eyes. As he stepped closer, you noticed him carry something. It was the lion’s fur Tsukasa had draped over his shoulders before making peace with the Kingdom of Science.
Wordlessly, he paused infront of you two and wrapped both of you up in it.
“It’s cold.”, he said after a beat of silence, “I’ll bring him back. And that’s a fact.”
Ryusui Nanami
Your eyebrows were already furrowed when Ryusui ended up being one of the three to test the hot air balloon. Sure, you trusted in Senku’s abilities - you’ve seen what that mind of his can accomplish - but there was still room for unexpected errors. Errors that could lead to very horrible things you did not want to think about. Regardless, that adventure addicted man never missed out on a chance to make you age an additional ten years with his antics.
And as much as you would love to smile lovingly into the distance and say you wouldn’t have it any other way- Well, you couldn’t. You didn’t dare take away such a significant chunk of who he was, but you’d still appreciated it if he would slow down every now and then.
That poor heart of yours was on the brink of explosion almost every single day.
If only that stupid, stupid man wasn’t the love of your life.
For the nth time you looked up into the sky, in the direction the hot air balloon took off in. The stress was messing so hard with your brain you would constantly stop in the middle of your tasks, “Must be a real ain p-ay to deal with, huh?”, Gen appeared on your side, a half-amused, half-sympathetic look on his face. You shared eye-contact for a moment, before humming and looking back into the distance. He followed your gaze, “They’re all going to make it there safely. Senku wouldn’t have it any other way. And that man of yours doesn’t seem like the type to die easily.”, he tried to comfort you.
In return, you offer a sad smile, “Yeah, you’re right. He always comes back to me.”, you pause with a shaky breath, trying to surpress the tears that only seem to dwell up when you talk about your fear, “But…There can always be something.”
“Gen! We need your help over here!”
Nodding in understanding, you urged him to go see what’s up, assuring him you’ll be fine in time. As soon as he left, you let yourself sink to the ground, pulling your knees to your chest. The bustling noise in the distance started to feel like static, leaving you alone in an unbearable silence. Or were you too deep in your own head to hear anything? Either way, it started eating at you. Gnawing on your heart and mind.
You didn’t notice the tears at first. Only when the hiccups began did you realise you were crying.
That dumb, dumb, idiot.
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tiramissyoucake · 2 years ago
Text
Bimbo doll
MINORS + AGELESS BLOGS DNI, Satoru gojo x reader, all characters are 18+, reader is heavily bimbo coded and loves pink, satoru's gross here, 1.3k words approx
CW: Masturbation, satoru gets horny over reader sending him pics of her dresses, satoru has fantasies of reader and she's unaware, again satoru is gross here you've been warned, some proof reading but very little
Notes: I'm so sleepy and I'm too lazy to fix any other mistakes so if you see mistake no you didnt. had to write sth for Satoru, as wit all of my creative works I hate this but I hope u like it though!!
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Satoru thinks you're absolutely adorable. From the moment he was blinded by the absurd amount of pink you were wearing, he thought you were the cutest thing on this planet. The coordinated color palettes of your clothes that always had a splash of pink, that shiny layer of gloss on your lips that you regularly reapplied, he gets so happy when he hears the clack of keychains because that means you're near.
Of course he couldn't keep himself away and you both exchanged numbers at one point, you gladly gave it to him after he shot you a lame pick up line— to which you laughed and smiled, simply telling him "you're funny! Sure!"It was almost too good to be true.
You got along well with each other, you both liked sweets, complimented each other's fashion sense, shared a similar sense of humour— when satoru asked you to describe him, you told him that you love being around him because he's fun (you said something about how he 'gets it', a quote about girls.. getting it and others not getting it..? He didn't understand, but he deduced that you like him, and that's all that matters.)
Satoru notices you love sharing tidbits of your day, and most of the time, you usually share a photo related to it in some way along with multiple typos, abbreviations, and emoticons.
"(Name)💘: Toru omg look at these shoes! Super cute right :3" Attached image sent.
"(Name)💘: I went 2 that cafe u told me, the strawberry shortcake is soooo good" Attached image sent.
"(Name)💘: I have 2 go 2 a party tonite, which dress should i choose!1!!??" 4 images sent.
Being friends with you had its benefits, you were comfortable with Satoru, so comfortable that he almost dropped his phone when he opened the images you sent; all of them were minidresses, all of them different shades of pink, all of them hugging your figure so tightly and snuggly he was tempted to stalk your social media to know where this party is.
He couldn't see the details that differentiated each dress, or at least he didn't focus on them as he felt his cock throb in his sweatpants.
"Ooooohhhhhfffuuck..." he mumbled longly to no one in particular, Satoru almost choked on his spit as he sat up from his position in his bed, all the heat rushing to his face as he examined your photos closely. Your poses so cute as you stared at your phone screen in the photos with a small pout, you had the pretty sparkly gloss on this time, that's his favorite..
(Name)💘: TORU OMFG PLZ ANSWEERRRR MY RIDES ALMOST HERE >:(
he almost forgot your little dilemma.
"Sorry lol I was eating, go with this one!!" he forwarded one of the four dresses with his response and sent his text, he felt guilty about lying but what was he supposed to say? 'My bad! You were so hot I got a little hard like some Virgin!' No way in hell.
You answered back quickly, how did you type quicker than he did with nails longer than his? He has a hunch it's because you don't care about typos but the dedication is admirable.
(Name)💘: TGANK UUUUU ill text u after the party!
(Name)💘: thank* lol
He let out a small laugh at your typo, scrolling back to the photos he zoomed in on one of the four he hadn't picked, and the reason why he didn't choose this dress is that he knows no sane rational person with a sexual libido would be able to resist you in this.
You looked so cute, so perfect, Satoru let out a small sigh as he pulled his dick out of his pants hissing at the cold air, his thumb smeared the precum over his tip. He should feel bad– terrible even, but how can he resist? There's no way you have no idea what you do to him, he tried justifying in his mind as his cock throbbed desperately in his hand.
Biting his bottom lip, the image of you in his phone fueled his imagination as he envisioned arriving with you at this party you mentioned, having such a pretty thing like you on his arm would be a major ego boost too. The length of your dress could easily allow him to pull down your panties (did you even have a pair on under that dress?), bend you over the host's bathroom sink and slam his cock balls deep inside you, relentlessly filling you then demanding you to pull your panties back up and come back to the party with him as his cum would be dripping between your thighs.
As Satoru bucked his hips up into his hand, he stopped briefly to spit into his hand, deciding there's no time to look for lube, he went back to fucking his hand to the thought of you. If only you knew your new friend got off to these innocent pictures you sent him, if only you knew what he wanted to do to you– he's confident you wouldn't wanna be friends anymore. Shaking his head he pushed aside those thoughts and focused on his current pleasure, his fantasy, his goal of cumming from the pictures of you in those dresses you handpicked to show him.
He mumbled words of encouragement as if you were there with him right now bouncing on his dick instead of the reality of his hand moving up and down, mutters of 'good girl's and praises like "so good, baby" and "yeah? You like that?", desperate to convince himself of his fantasy. Satoru tossed aside his phone long ago after making sure the photos were engraved in his mind, he wasn't expecting you to update him until sometime near midnight.
his eyes closed as his other hand slid up his stomach pushing up the material of his shirt until it reached his collarbone, his fingers trying to find any weak points on his body to rub, pinch or entice as his hand rubbed his dick to the pace of his imaginary storyline; where he dreamed of driving you back home and stuffing you full of his cock until the only word that was in your vocabulary was his name.
"Yesyesyes, (Name)..! Mmmmmhffuck..!" He groaned out as he felt his end near already, his face warming up to a soft reddish pink reminiscent of the tip of his dick as he fucked his hand, soft gasps and groans escaped him as he imagined all the filthy things he could do to you, all the filthy things he wanted to know about you.
What type of panties do you always wear? What type of men make you horny? Who have you been with? Would you let him fuck you? 'Please lemme fuck you, lemme fuck you..! Wanna fuck you..!'
The vulgarity of his desperation made him blush but brought him dangerously close to the edge, squeezing the base of his cock Satoru covered his mouth instinctively, he bucked up his hips as his cum coated his abdomen, stomach and some droplets even reached his chest. He moaned behind his hand as he felt the waves of pleasure shock through his body. He slowed his hips, mumbling for the imaginary you once more. "Take it, take it all, baby.."
He didn't want to move, he knew he had to but he wanted to relish in his fantasy a little longer, he wanted to pull you close and sloppily kiss your cute glossy lips and praise you for being a good girl, taking his load like that. He imagined his cum oozing from your slit but he wouldn't let it go to waste, he'd use his finger to slide it back in where he knows it belongs.
He remembered to save those photos for.. 'next time', reaching over to get his phone, he paused as he received a notification.
(Name)💘: party was lame, coming 2 ur place!! >:3c
Sitting up, the sweat that collected at his back from his 'session' cooled him off, he cleaned himself up and couldn't help but grin at your adorable message.
You don't need to worry, he'll entertain you more than any dumb party could.
1K notes · View notes
playboysaleen · 5 months ago
Text
Through Ash and Iron (10)
Jinx x Reader x Caitlyn
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Summary: Through Ash and Iron plunges you into the heart of Piltover’s gritty streets, where you’ve always felt the weight of your family’s failures. Rejected from the Junior Enforcer Program, your anger burns brighter than ever—until one fateful punch changes everything. The eyes of Piltover’s elite may look down on you, but it’s the wild eyes of Jinx that truly see you. She’s chaos personified, and you’re drawn to the destruction she promises. But that’s not all. Caitlyn Kiramman, a poised enforcer with a soft spot for rebels like you, offers you a chance to rewrite your future—if you can control the rage you can’t seem to escape.Torn between the order Caitlyn represents and the dangerous freedom Jinx offers, you stand at the crossroads of two worlds. As your power grows, so does the tension between these two women. One promises a chance at belonging, while the other ignites a fire you didn’t know you had. But the choices you make will change everything—not just for you, but for both cities teetering on the edge of war. Who will you choose? And how much of yourself will you lose along the way?
Warnings: Violence duh, gay panic(lol), cursing, all that jazz (whatever you seen in Arcane is what you gon see here)This is also a slight AU.(She/her)
Word Count: 4.1k
A/n: Blessed yall with a little some<3
___________________
The walk back was quiet at first, each step labored but steady. Jinx broke the silence, her voice soft but teasing. “So, uh, you planning on pulling any more crazy stunts? Or is this the last ‘explode-the-lab’ gig?” 
You chuckled weakly, wincing as you leaned more on her. “No promises.”  
Caitlyn shot Jinx a pointed look. “She’s been awake for all of ten minutes, and you’re already asking for trouble?” 
Jinx smirked. “Just keeping her on her toes, cupcake.”  
You smiled faintly at their banter, your gaze falling to Isha, who was fiddling with the clasp of her helmet. You tapped it gently, drawing her attention. “You kept me sane too, you know.” Your voice was soft, almost reverent. “Thank you for waiting for me.” 
Isha giggled, her helmet bobbing as she nodded.  
When you finally reached your apartment, you paused at the threshold, leaning against the doorframe. The others watched you closely as you looked around, taking in every detail. The familiar, worn furniture. The cluttered workbench. The drawings Isha had left by your bedside. It was home, and yet… it wasn’t.  
You walked inside slowly, your movements deliberate. Caitlyn and Jinx exchanged worried glances as you moved to the center of the room and stood still, your hands brushing over the edge of the table.  
“I felt… stuck,” you said suddenly, your voice breaking the quiet. You didn’t turn to face them, your head bowed. “When Viktor took control, it was like… I wasn’t me anymore. I was watching everything happen, but I couldn’t stop it. I couldn’t stop him.”  
You turned then, your expression raw and open. “I was lost. But the two of you…” Your voice cracked, and you swallowed hard. “You were the thread keeping me tethered. Keeping me from slipping away completely.”  
Jinx’s lips parted, her eyes glistening as she opened her mouth to speak, but you shook your head, smiling faintly.  
You reached down, brushing a strand of hair from Isha’s face and tapping her helmet once more. “And you, too, kid. You reminded me what it was all for.” 
Isha grinned, wrapping her arms around your waist.  
You let out a shaky breath, looking between Jinx and Caitlyn with gratitude shining in your eyes. “Thank you,” you whispered, the words carrying the weight of everything you couldn’t say.  
Jinx looked away, her hands on her hips, muttering, “Don’t make me cry, damn it.” 
Caitlyn smiled softly, stepping closer. “You don’t need to thank us. We’re just glad you’re here.”  
But your expression shifted, a quiet determination settling over you as you began gathering a few belongings—a satchel, a jacket, and a small notebook.  
Jinx frowned, stepping forward. “What are you doing?” 
You slung the satchel over your shoulder, turning to face them both. “This isn’t my home.”
Caitlyn blinked, her brow furrowing. “What do you mean? You’ve lived here for years.”  
Your eyes softened as you stepped closer, reaching out to take both their hands in yours. “Home isn’t a place,” you said quietly, your voice steady. “It’s with you. Both of you.”  
Jinx’s breath hitched, and Caitlyn’s lips parted, her eyes searching yours.  
“Wherever you go,” you continued, “that’s where I belong.”  
The room fell silent, the weight of your words sinking in. And then, Jinx let out a quiet laugh, pulling you into a fierce hug. Caitlyn followed, wrapping her arms around you both, her head resting against your shoulder.  
For the first time in a long time, you felt whole.
The pillow fort was a masterpiece of chaos and comfort, a cocoon of mismatched blankets, glowing string lights, and plush pillows stacked haphazardly. You sat cross-legged inside with Isha, who was busily coloring in her sketchbook, her tiny hands moving with careful focus. Jinx, perched a few feet away at her workbench, tinkered with one of her gadgets. The faint hum of machinery filled the room, blending with the soft scratching of crayons.  
You glanced up from Isha’s drawing—a lopsided rendition of you holding hands with her and Jinx—and found your gaze drifting to Jinx. Without thinking, you stood, brushing off stray bits of fabric, and wandered over to her.  
Jinx didn’t look up as you approached, her hands deftly adjusting screws and wires. You slipped your arms around her waist from behind, pulling her close.  
She stiffened slightly before leaning back into you, her hands pausing mid-movement.  
You pressed a kiss to her temple, your voice soft and warm. “Come spend time with us.”  
Jinx tilted her head, glancing at you out of the corner of her eye with a smirk. “You’re needy today.”  
You chuckled, resting your chin on her shoulder. “And you love it.” 
She set down her tools with an exaggerated sigh, swiveling in her chair to face you. “Fine, fine. But only because Isha’s better company than you.”  
“I’ll take it,” you said, grinning as you tugged her toward the fort.  
Jinx plopped down beside Isha, stealing a crayon and starting to doodle with a mischievous grin. The three of you colored in companionable silence, the occasional jab or laugh punctuating the calm. Jinx would nudge your elbow just as you were drawing, or Isha would scold her for coloring outside the lines.  
After a while, Jinx leaned back on her elbows, her gaze flickering to you with a faintly teasing glint. “So…” she started, drawing the word out.  
You didn’t look up. “So what?”  
She tilted her head. “You’ve been quiet about Caitlyn.”  
That got your attention. You glanced at her, your brow furrowing slightly. “What about her?” 
Jinx rolled her eyes, tossing the crayon she was holding. “Oh, come on. Don’t play dumb. You haven’t seen her in what… a week? Two?”  
You looked away, your fingers tightening around the edge of the paper. “She’s busy. I didn’t want to bother her.”
Jinx snorted. “Bother her? You think she doesn’t want to see you?” She sat up, fixing you with a look that was both playful and serious. “You miss her. Admit it.” 
You hesitated before sighing, your shoulders slumping. “I do,” you admitted quietly. “I miss her more than I thought I would.”  
Jinx grinned, satisfied. “Then go see her.”  
You shook your head, though your resolve was already crumbling. “It’s late. She’s probably—”  
Jinx cut you off, leaning in and pressing a firm kiss to your lips. When she pulled back, she smirked. “You’re going. Isha and I’ll hold down the fort. Just be back by tomorrow afternoon, alright?”  
---
The streets of Piltover were quiet as you made your way to Caitlyn’s home, the cool night air wrapping around you. You hesitated briefly at her door, your hand hovering over the wood. Finally, you knocked softly.  
It took a moment, but the door creaked open to reveal Caitlyn, her hair slightly tousled and her silk nightwear catching the faint light from inside. Her blue eyes widened in surprise.  
“You’re here,” she said, her voice soft with disbelief.  
You didn’t respond—not with words. Instead, you stepped forward, cupping her face in your hands. Her breath hitched as your thumbs brushed against her cheeks, and before she could say anything else, you kissed her.  
The world seemed to stop as your lips met. Her hands flew to your shirt, clutching the fabric as if she feared you’d vanish. You poured everything into the kiss—all the longing, the unspoken words, the gratitude for her unwavering presence.  
Caitlyn melted against you, her fingers twisting in your shirt as she pressed closer. Her lips moved against yours, tentative at first but growing more confident. She tasted faintly of tea, her warmth seeping into you like a balm.  
When you finally broke apart, she rested her forehead against yours, her breath coming in soft, uneven pants. Her hands still clung to your shirt, her eyes searching yours.  
“I thought I’d lost you again,” she whispered, her voice trembling.  
You shook your head, brushing a strand of hair from her face. “I’m here. And I’m not going anywhere.” 
Her eyes glistened, and she nodded, pulling you into another embrace. You held her tightly, grounding yourself in her presence.  
This moment—this intimacy—felt like coming home. 
The warm morning sun streamed through the window, casting a golden glow across the room. You stirred, the light warming your skin and coaxing you from sleep. Instinctively, you reached out for Caitlyn, but your hand met only cool sheets. A pang of disappointment settled in your chest as you turned, only to see her standing in the doorway, framed by the soft light.  
She was dressed in a loose robe, her hair slightly disheveled, and her blue eyes were fixed on you with a mix of warmth and something deeper.  
“Couldn’t sleep in?” you asked, your voice still heavy with sleep.  
Caitlyn smiled softly, stepping into the room. “Not with you here.” She leaned against the doorframe, her gaze never leaving you. “Having you by my side last night… in your arms… it felt like everything I needed.”  
Your heart ached at the vulnerability in her tone. You opened your mouth to respond, but she continued, her cheeks tinged pink. “I spent hours just… watching you sleep. Memorizing every detail. It felt selfish, but I couldn’t stop myself.” 
You held out your hand to her, and she crossed the room without hesitation, slipping into the bed beside you. You pulled her close, tucking her against your chest.  
“You know,” you began, your voice soft, “I used to think about the first time we officially met a lot.”  
Caitlyn tilted her head, her curiosity piqued. “Oh?” 
You nodded, a faint smile playing on your lips. “That fight with Garret? I swear, I thought you were about to throw me in a cell and toss the key. But then…”  
“Then I brought you food,” she finished, laughing gently.  
“Exactly,” you said, chuckling. “And it wasn’t just food. It was damn good food.” 
Her laugh filled the room, light and musical, and it struck you how much it affected you—how it melted some unspoken part of you.  
“Then there was the time I made food for you,” you continued, teasing. “You didn’t even blink before going in for seconds. That’s when I knew.”
She raised an eyebrow, amused. “Knew what?” 
You smirked. “Knew you definitely didn’t have a boyfriend.”  
Caitlyn’s laugh came louder this time, and she buried her face against your chest. You could feel the slight shake of her shoulders, and it was impossible not to smile.  
Her laughter faded into a comfortable silence, and she looked up at you, her expression softening. For a moment, it seemed like she wanted to say something, her lips parting hesitantly.  
“What is it?” you asked, brushing a strand of hair from her face.  
She shook her head slightly, but her eyes betrayed her. They flicked to your lips for the briefest moment, and you caught it.  
“You’re overthinking again,” you teased, your voice low.  
Before she could protest, you leaned down and kissed her softly. The kiss was tender, unhurried—a silent promise. Caitlyn melted into you, her hands coming up to rest against your chest as she responded, her lips moving against yours with a sweetness that stole your breath.  
When you pulled back, she smiled, her cheeks flushed, and you couldn’t help but press another quick kiss to her forehead.  
---
Later, as you dressed to head back to Jinx’s and Caitlyn got ready for work, the air between you was filled with a quiet longing. You caught her watching you more than once, and each time, she looked away with a faint blush.  
At the door, you both lingered, unwilling to part. Caitlyn hesitated, her fingers brushing against yours. “Will you come back soon?” she asked softly.  
You nodded, a small smile tugging at your lips. “I will. I’ll talk to Jinx—figure out a way to spend time with you both.”  
Her eyes lit up at your words, and she reached out to squeeze your hand. Just as she began to speak, you stepped forward, your hands finding her waist.  
“Wait—” 
You cut her off with a kiss, one that was deeper than before, filled with the promise of your return. When you finally pulled away, you grinned, your voice light with teasing warmth.  
I’ll see you soon, Commander.”  
Without waiting for her response, you slipped out the door, leaving her standing there, her fingers touching her lips, her heart racing.
->
The morning sun cast a radiant glow over Piltover, and for once, Caitlyn strode into the Enforcer headquarters with a spring in her step. Her usually composed demeanor carried a newfound brightness that hadn’t been there in years. Enforcers exchanging reports or standing guard noticed the change immediately.  
“Morning, Commander,” one of them greeted, a hint of curiosity in his tone.  
“Good morning,” Caitlyn replied, her smile soft yet genuine. It was a smile that left those around her exchanging glances.  
Even as she walked through the hallways, handling her duties with her usual efficiency, there was something unmistakably different about her. She hummed softly under her breath, her posture loose and relaxed. She felt lighter, as though the weight of the city’s struggles had shifted—at least a little.  
Ambessa Medarda watched all of this with sharp, calculating eyes. She leaned against a pillar near the training yard, her arms crossed, her imposing frame cloaked in a commanding silence. The woman’s keen sense for power plays and shifting alliances tingled as she observed Caitlyn dismissing officers with quick decisions and navigating problems with ease.  
When Caitlyn finally noticed Ambessa’s presence, she sighed inwardly but kept her composure. “Ambessa,” she greeted, her voice polite but firm. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”  
Ambessa stepped forward, her expression unreadable but her tone pointed. “You’re glowing today, Caitlyn. I’d even say… radiant. Care to share the secret?”  
Caitlyn’s lips quirked into a faint smirk. “Perhaps I’ve finally found a moment of peace.”  
Ambessa raised a brow. “Peace, you say? That’s a dangerous word in a city on the verge of collapse.”  
The older woman’s probing gaze was relentless, but Caitlyn held her ground, her confidence unwavering.  
“And yet,” Caitlyn replied calmly, “it’s a goal worth striving for. I’ve been working to ensure Piltover and the Undercity don’t just survive—but coexist.”  
Ambessa’s eyes narrowed. “Coexistence? Do you honestly believe that’s possible, Caitlyn? You’ve seen what they’re capable of.”  
Caitlyn’s expression softened for a moment, her thoughts drifting to you and the quiet determination in your eyes. “I’ve seen what they’re capable of, yes. But I’ve also seen their potential when given the chance.”  
Ambessa stepped closer, her voice dropping to a low, deliberate tone. “Do you think those alliances you’re building will hold? Jinx, of all people? She’s volatile. She’s dangerous.”  
Caitlyn’s jaw tightened slightly, but she remained steady. “Jinx is more than what people see. She’s capable of change—of building something better. And we’ve already taken the first steps to bring down the barriers that separate us.”  
Ambessa scoffed. “The borders between Piltover and Zaun are there for a reason, Caitlyn. You think tearing them down will lead to peace? It will lead to chaos.”  
Caitlyn took a step forward, her voice steady and sharp. “The chaos has been here for decades, Ambessa. It’s the borders that fuel it. For the first time in years, there’s a chance for hope. For trust. And I’ll do whatever it takes to protect that chance.” 
Ambessa studied her, searching for any sign of weakness, but found none. Caitlyn’s resolve was unshakable, fortified by the quiet strength she had found in you.  
Finally, Ambessa’s lips curved into a faint, humorless smile. “You’ve changed. I wonder… who’s responsible for this new Caitlyn?”  
Caitlyn met her gaze with a quiet confidence. “Someone who taught me that peace isn’t just a dream—it’s a choice. One I’m ready to fight for.”  
Ambessa stepped back, a glimmer of respect in her eyes, though it was tempered by her ever-present skepticism. “Then I hope, for your sake, that you’ve chosen wisely.”  
Caitlyn watched as Ambessa strode away, her mind already turning back to her plans. She thought of you—your warmth, your determination, the way you bridged worlds with a strength she couldn’t help but admire.  
As she returned to her duties, the vision of a united Piltover and Zaun became clearer in her mind. It wasn’t just a dream anymore; it was a future she could almost touch, one she knew she could help build—with you by her side.
The quiet hum of the city filled the air in the small rooftop apartment you had kept—a neutral ground, perfectly straddling the line between Piltover’s gleaming towers and Zaun’s gritty sprawl. You sat at the modest wooden table, papers spread out in front of you, your hood pulled back to let the dim glow of the streetlights outside illuminate your face.  
Jinx sat cross-legged on the opposite end of the table, one of the treaty drafts in her hands. Her eyes darted across the text, but every now and then, she glanced at you, her lips twitching into a small smirk.  
“You know,” she said, her voice playful, “if you told me a year ago that I’d be sitting here reading Piltover paperwork with you, I’d have laughed in your face. Maybe blown something up for good measure.”  
You didn’t look up from the page you were reading, but your lips quirked into a faint smile. “Funny, I was thinking the same thing about you knowing how to read.”  
Jinx let out a dramatic gasp, clutching her chest. “Oh, the audacity! You wound me, babe.”  
“You’ll live,” you teased back, still focused on the treaty.  
She stuck her tongue out at you before settling down again, though her gaze lingered on you longer this time. After a few moments of silence, she spoke again, her tone softer. “You know... this is kinda crazy, right? Piltover and Zaun trying to make peace? After decades of blowing each other to bits?”  
You finally glanced up at her, setting your pen down. “Crazy doesn’t mean impossible. You’re proof of that.”  
She snorted, but there was a warmth in her eyes. “Guess you’re rubbing off on me.”  
“About time,” you quipped, earning a laugh from her.  
Jinx leaned back in her chair, holding the paper up and tilting her head as she studied it. “You really think this’ll work?”  
You looked at her, the weight of her question settling between you. “I think... It's a start. A small act of peace can lead to something bigger. And for once, both sides are willing to try. That’s because of you—and Caitlyn. The two of you taking that first step.”  
Jinx’s expression softened in a way you rarely saw. She set the paper down and stood, walking over to you. Without a word, she slid into your lap, her arms draping around your shoulders as she rested her forehead against yours.  
“You know,” she murmured, her voice low and intimate, “I don’t say this enough... but you’re kinda amazing.”  
You raised a brow, smirking. “‘Kinda?’ I’ll take it.”  
She rolled her eyes before pressing a tender kiss to your temple. Her lips lingered there for a moment, and when she pulled back, her gaze was serious. “I mean it. You’ve done something no one else has ever been able to do. You’ve made me... care. About people. About Zaun. About this stupid treaty.”  
You cupped her cheek gently, your thumb brushing against her skin. “Maybe I just reminded you of what was always there.”  
Her lips found yours in a kiss that started soft but quickly deepened. The warmth of her body against yours, the way she clung to you as if grounding herself—it was rare for Jinx to show this level of vulnerability, but with you, she let the walls fall.  
When you finally pulled apart, her breath warm against your cheek, she whispered, “You know... I’ve been thinking.”  
You tilted your head, intrigued. “Should I be worried?” 
She smirked, but her tone was serious. “I want you to take Sevika’s spot.”  
You blinked, caught off guard. “What?”  
“I’m serious,” she said, her hands tracing idle patterns on your shoulders. “You’d be perfect. You’ve already got both sides listening to you. Zaun trusts you. And if you do it... I’ll be there. By your side. We could do this together.”  
You leaned back slightly, searching her face. “Jinx, this isn’t something I can just decide on a whim. Caitlyn doesn’t even know about this.”  
She leaned in closer, her lips brushing against your ear. “She’ll understand. She loves you. And this? This isn’t just for Zaun. It’s for her too. For both of us.”  
Her words hung in the air, heavy with meaning. You were quiet, your mind racing, but as Jinx rested her head against your shoulder, her arms tightening around you, you felt the weight of her trust and belief in you.  
“You don’t have to decide now,” she murmured. “Just... think about it.”  
You nodded slowly, pressing a soft kiss to her temple. “I will.” 
And as you held her close, the world outside the apartment seemed a little less daunting, the path forward a little clearer—if only for a moment.
The air buzzed with the sound of chatter and the clinking of tools as merchants worked along the border markets. You found a quiet contentment in assisting a small stall, helping an elderly man and his crippled son stock their wares. It was something you loved—bringing a little ease to those who needed it.  
The old man gave you a grateful smile as you carefully arranged the fragile jars of homemade oil on the wooden table. The boy, his leg bound in a crude brace, watched with wide eyes as you handed him a small, polished toy you had whittled in your spare time.  
“Here,” you said softly. “A little something to keep you busy.”  
His face lit up, and his father clapped a hand to your shoulder, his gratitude unspoken but clear.  
The peace of the moment didn’t last long. Garrett, flanked by a few junior enforcers, strode through the marketplace with his usual swagger. He spotted you immediately, his lip curling in disdain, but his attention quickly turned to the small stand you were helping. With an exaggerated huff, he swiped his hand across the table, knocking several jars to the ground. Glass shattered, oil spilling onto the dusty cobblestone.  
The elder man gasped, his son flinching at the sound. You straightened slowly, your gray eyes narrowing as you looked at Garrett. Your face betrayed no anger, only a cold, neutral calm that sent a ripple of tension through those watching.  
Before Garrett could step away, you crossed the distance between you, your movements deliberate. With one swift motion, your hand clamped around the back of his neck. He yelped in surprise, his bravado crumbling as you dragged him unceremoniously through the market.  
Caitlyn, overseeing the Junior Enforcer Program nearby, caught sight of the commotion. Her sharp eyes immediately locked on Garrett—and then on you, your expression unreadable as you approached.  
You stopped in front of her, releasing Garrett with a firm push that sent him stumbling. Caitlyn’s brow furrowed, but when her gaze met yours, she understood everything in an instant.  
“Enforcer Garrett,” she began, her voice calm but commanding, “what do you think your role is here?”  
Garrett hesitated, his usual arrogance faltering under her piercing stare.  
“To... uphold the law,” he mumbled.  
“Exactly,” Caitlyn said, stepping forward. “To uphold the law. To protect and serve. Not to intimidate. Not to destroy. Your actions today are a reminder of why the divide between Piltover and Zaun exists in the first place.” Her voice carried across the marketplace, drawing the attention of merchants and passersby.  
She turned to the crowd, her gaze firm. “Peace is not just a word. It is an action. A choice we make every day to rise above our differences and treat one another with respect and dignity. If we want a future where Piltover and Zaun can coexist, we must hold ourselves to a higher standard.”  
The crowd murmured in agreement, heads nodding. Garrett looked down, shame written across his face.  
You watched Caitlyn with a quiet pride, a faint smirk tugging at your lips. She was commanding, grounded, and resolute—a far cry from the officer you had first met, yet still very much the woman you had come to love.  
As she finished her speech, she extended her hand to you. You hesitated for only a moment before clasping it firmly, your smirk softening into a genuine smile.  
“Well said, Commander,” you murmured.  
She returned the smile, her fingers lingering against yours for just a second too long.  
The crowd, moved by the display, broke into applause. Piltover and Zaun merchants alike clapped, their cheers echoing through the market.  
You and Caitlyn exchanged one last glance—loving, unspoken, yet entirely professional. The understanding between you was clear: this was just the beginning of what you could accomplish together.  
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Okay, if you think Cait and the reader slept together? No, not yet- Im saving that for a way better time. Enjoy!
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biblical-chronicles · 4 months ago
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Washing machine
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where Noel gets asked a ridiculous question about you in an interview, and the two of you decide to show the press how it really is.
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When the journalists filed in, bright-eyed and clutching their recorders, Noel offered a small, polite nod.
The questions started simple enough: the tour, the setlists, his creative process.
“Yeah, yeah, the gigs have been decent. Fans’ve been loud, so that’s a good sign, innit? Better than people standing there like they’ve been dragged in at gunpoint.”
It was routine, nothing too exciting, but he knew how to play the game.
Then the conversation took a turn.
“So, Noel,” one of the interviewers began, leaning forward slightly, “we’ve noticed you’ve been seen out and about with your girlfriend recently. How’s she doing?”
Noel’s face softened instantly. “She’s alright, yeah. Keeps me sane, that one. Proper good laugh, you know? Got more brains than me too, which isn’t hard, but still.” He chuckled, visibly relaxing as he spoke about you. “She’s busy as ever, but she’s always making time to come out when she can. Don’t know how she does it, to be honest.”
The room chuckled along, sensing how much he enjoyed talking about you. For a moment, it seemed like the interview had taken a genuinely pleasant direction. But then, another journalist jumped in with a question that made the air shift.
“So Noel, there’s been a bit of chatter about her wardrobe actually.” they started, a tone of forced nonchalance in their voice.
Noel squinted, the beginnings of a frown forming. “Her wardrobe? What about it?”
“Well,” the journalist continued, clearly enjoying the setup, “there’s this idea floating around that she’s always wearing something new every time she’s spotted. Some people are saying she’s spoiled and blowing through your money, you know, buying new clothes constantly. How do you feel about that?”
The silence that followed was deafening. Noel’s eyebrows shot up, his head tilting slightly as if he couldn’t quite believe what he’d just heard.
“What?” he said flatly.
The journalist hesitated, but pushed on. “I mean, it’s just—some people are wondering if—”
“Hang on,” Noel cut in, sitting up straighter. “Are you suggesting me missus is some kind of gold digger? Is that what you’re trying to say?”
The journalist stammered, clearly unprepared for the shift in tone. “No, no, it’s just—”
“No, no, no,” Noel interrupted, his voice rising slightly. “Let’s get this straight. First of all, she’s got her own job, alright? Makes her own money, does her own thing. She doesn’t need me cash, and she’d be fine without me, thank you very much.”
The room was tense now, the other journalists exchanging uneasy glances.
“And secondly,” he continued, leaning forward, “we've got a bloody washing machine, alright? She takes care of her things. You lot just see a few stitched-together pictures and think it’s some kind of bloody fashion show. It’s not me fault the press can’t specify Monday from Friday.”
He paused for a moment, shaking his head in disbelief. “And even if she did wear summat new every day—which she doesn’t, by the way—what’s it to you? How is that anyone’s business? Between you and me, I’m probably the one who re-wears stuff less. So maybe ask me where all me shirts go instead of coming for her.”
The journalists sat in stunned silence as Noel stood up, visibly fuming.
“Unbelievable.” he muttered, running a hand through his hair. He shot a glare at the journalist who’d asked the question. “You lot need to find better things to talk about. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m done here.”
Without another word, he stormed out, the door slamming shut behind him.
Noel had barely kicked off his shoes and slumped onto the couch when you appeared from the kitchen, carrying two brews. You handed him one before curling up beside him, your legs tucked beneath you.
“How was the interview?” you asked, taking a sip.
Noel gave a dry laugh, rubbing his face. “Christ, where do I start? It was the usual bollocks at first, but then it took a proper nosedive into the ridiculous.”
You raised an eyebrow. “Oh? Do tell.”
He turned to face you, his expression a mix of amusement and disbelief. “They started asking about you—how you’re doing and all that, which was fine. But then this one knobhead pipes up and goes, ‘Does she wear her clothes more than once?’”
You nearly choked on your tea, setting the mug down quickly. “Wait, what? They actually asked that?”
“Swear on me life,” he said, shaking his head. “Apparently, the press reckon you’re wearing something new every day and spending all me money on it.”
You just started laughing. “Oh my god. That is—what? Who even thinks of that?”
“I know.” he said, grinning now that you were in on the joke. “Told ’em we’ve got a washing machine, didn’t I? That shut ‘em up for a bit.”
You leaned back, clutching your stomach as the absurdity sank in. “This is gold. I really want to see what headline they come up with. Summat like… Shocking! Noel Gallagher’s girlfriend owns more than one pair of kecks!”
That set him off laughing. “Bang on, that. I’d bet me last quid they’ll write summat daft like that.”
Grabbing your phone, you started scrolling through some of the usual clickbait sites, searching for any fresh articles.
“Found it.” you said, holding the phone up. Noel leaned in to read over your shoulder.
The headline read: “Noel Gallagher Defends Girlfriend Over Lavish Spending Rumors: ‘We’ve Got a Washing Machine!’”
You both burst out laughing. “Oh my God, Noel,” you wheezed. “Would you have imagined, that one day you’d be clarifying that you own a bloody washing machine?”
“I’ve done some mad interviews in me time,” he said, catching his breath. “But this one? This is a new low for journalism.”
You were still laughing when you scrolled further down the article, but the humor faded as you spotted a particularly biting section. It was a line speculating that you might be using Noel for his money, complete with some snide quotes from “anonymous sources.”
Your laughter trailed off, and you set the phone down, biting your lip.
“What’s up?” Noel asked, noticing the shift in your mood.
You hesitated, then looked at him. “Do they really think that? That I’m some sort of gold digger?”
Noel’s expression hardened instantly. “Oi, don’t let that crap get in your head. They don’t know you. They don’t know us. It’s just noise.”
“But—”
“But nowt.” he interrupted, shifting closer and taking your hand in his. “Listen to me. You’ve got your own job, your own life. You’ve never taken a thing from me that you didn’t need or couldn’t give back tenfold. Anyone with half a brain can see that.”
You nodded, but the sting lingered. Noel, sensing that, squeezed your hand and softened his tone.
“Tell you what,” he said, leaning back and draping an arm around your shoulders. “Let me take you out tonight. Somewhere nice. No cooking, no cleaning—just us, yeah? You’ve probably had a long day as it is.”
You smiled despite yourself. “You don’t have to do that, Noel.”
“I know I don’t,” he said, grinning. “But I want to. Come on, let me spoil you a bit. And if the press wants to chat shit about it tomorrow, they can bloody well crack on.”
His words made you laugh again, the warmth returning to your chest. “Alright then.” you said.
As you arrived the two of you settled into a booth near the window, Noel immediately scanning the menu.
“This place alright, then?” he asked, glancing over at you.
You nodded, a soft smile playing on your lips. “Yeah, it’s perfect.”
The two of you fell into easy conversation, but as you glanced out the window, something caught your eye—just a flicker of movement, the faint gleam of a camera lens.
“Oh, for fuck’s sake.” you muttered, turning back to Noel.
“What’s up now?” he asked, his brow furrowing slightly.
You gestured subtly toward the window. “Look who’s decided to capture yet another outfit of mine.”
Noel followed your gaze and let out a low groan. “Bloody vultures. Can’t give it a rest, can they?”
You sighed, leaning closer to him, trying to make yourself smaller. “I just don’t want to give them owt to work with, you know?”
Noel turned to you, his expression softening as he sensed your nerves.
“Alright,” he said, his voice low and teasing. “If they want a show, let’s give ’em one.”
You blinked at him, confused. “What? Noel, what are you—”
Before you could finish your sentence, he leaned in, his hand sliding gently around the back of your neck as he kissed you, and it wasn’t just a quick peck to shut you up.
Your hands gripped his jacket, pulling him closer without even realizing it, as the kiss deepened. There was no space between you, no time to think about the press or the cameras or anything else.
When he finally pulled back, his face still inches from yours, you were both breathing harder, your cheeks flushed. Noel grinned, his eyes sparkling with mischief.
“Well,” he said, his voice low and rough, “now they’ve got summat better to put in the papers, don’t they?”
You snorted, shaking your head as you tried to catch your breath. “Oh, yeah, that’s gonna make a great headline: Shock! Noel Gallagher kisses his own fucking missus!”
He barked out a laugh, leaning back slightly but keeping his arm draped around you. “Not bad, but I'd add summat.”
“Oh? What’s that then?”
"“‘and they both look great while they’re at it.’” He winked, the grin on his face so proud you couldn’t help but laugh.
“Unbelievable.” you muttered, still laughing as you shoved him playfully.
“Oi, don’t knock it,” he said, feigning offense. “Just tellin’ it like it is.”
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big thanks to @ngmyfav for the request, hope you like it love !! (and the rest of ya lot too ofc) xx
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sc0tters · 1 year ago
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Three’s the Crowd | Nick Moldenhauer & Luca Fantilli
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summary: at a team party two boys get the chance to have you, but what happens when you want them both?
request: yes/no
warnings: sexual themes, p in v, oral (m and fem receiving!), mild degradation, threesome, swearing.
word count: 5.02k
authors note: the Nick and Luca threesome is finally here and I’m embarrassed to admit how long it took me… @fantillisdaylight thank you for trusting me with this idea and I hope I have done it justice! this one gets hot people, that was the aim so let’s all hope I did it!
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You had always been someone Luca kept in his mind.
Becoming best friends with Adam when the boys signed to the Chicago Steel was probably one of the best things that had ever happened to you. He was the reason the University of Michigan went from third on your list of potentials to first. The Fantilli boy quickly became your person as he knew you like the back of his hand.
That’s why you ended up a little lost when he made the jump from college to the NHL. The man who kept you sane was no longer there and that what made you sink into the crowd as you needed a new sense of direction. So when Nick showed up it felt like your calls had all been answered with one swift movement.
Luca grew envious by how quickly you rekindled your friendship with the Moldenhauer boy who everyone swore had a crush on you. The thoughts were things that you had heard and anyone would have lied if they said they didn’t enjoy hearing how guys felt about them. But a level of greed seemed to seep into your mind as you turned into a glutton, taking the boys flirting yet still wanting more from other guys.
You thought you were slick as you would have multiple guys in your phone as you basked in the attention, but you had your favourite’s. Your main rule was that you never had these boys in your room, you could flirt but nothing was allowed to cross any lines as you were having fun.
Yet by the time the cold and icy air that January brought, so came a level of frustration that not even watching snow fall outside your window could cure. You were sexually frustrated and after weeks of contemplating and having to accept that your vibrator wasn’t strong enough to cure it. With the help of your friends you came up with the idea that would make you irresistible and if you were lucky more than one guy would end up in your trap.
Just as you hoped from the moment you walked into that party heads turned to watch you. Your black skirt was tight around your ass and your white cropped polo was barely keeping your bra hidden. Luca and Nick each stared at you from where they stood and you did little to hide your smirk “hey boys.” You stopped in front of them as you smiled.
You swore the boys had to be stupid to not see the way you had both of them in your hands “come here with anyone tonight?” Luca asked as he scanned the path behind you only to see a few of your friends from your dorm building walking on together “couldn’t I come see my favorite host alone?” You teased as the sophomore hockey players were hosting tonight after a run of big wins came from the team “you know I won’t turn down seeing you sweets.” The boy had given you the nickname years ago yet somehow it still brought a blush to your cheeks after all this time.
Nick resisted the urge to roll his eyes as he watched the sight before his eyes “you want a drink?” The question slipped from his lips reminding the sophomores that he was there “only if you’ll have one too.” The wink you sent him made any and all jealousy that he had practically vanish from his mind.
He let his hand lock into yours as he pulled you towards the kitchen. A smirk formed on Nicks lips as he could feel the glare that Luca sent him “happy to see you tonight princess.” Nick mumbled sending shivers down your spine.
Luca let a scowl form on his face as bile built up in his throat, if Nick wanted you to play this game then he was going to have a worthy opponent in Luca.
The party continued on and now with a slight buzz and a beer soaked shirt from when Gavin bumped into you. The bathroom seemed to call your name as you pressed your hand against the wall keeping you upright “you enjoying making a mess sweets?” Luca teased turning his attention from the blonde girl who had been up against the wall next to him.
You shook your head as you groaned “Gav did.” His face hardened as he left the girl irritated “gotta help my girl.” Luca shrugged as he sent you a smile.
His hand pressed to the small of your back ignoring her complaints as he ushered you into the bathroom “didn’t need you to come with me.” You mumbled as the door shut behind you “missed you tonight sweets.” Luca smiled as he watched you strip out of your white revealing your sticky pink bra.
He’d be lying if he said that as he watched you pat down your sticky skin, Luca felt his cock throb as his eyes trailed down to your skirt that seemed even shorter “clearly you did.” You scoffed as you shook your head think back to the girl who was next to him not even a few minutes ago.
A laugh left his lips as you furrowed your eyebrows “you jealous?” Sure she was a pretty little blonde, and sure she was exactly his type but she wasn’t you. And for Luca that mattered the most “please you think I care about what you do with some-” you were cut off as his lips hit yours.
His hand reached up as it tugged in your hair “lu.” You moaned leaving your mouth open as it gave him a chance to slide his tongue into your mouth “mhm.” He groaned pushing you against the sink as you sat up on the counter.
He pulled away giving him the chance to see your swollen lips as you looked up at him “some what?” Luca smirked as you sent him a glare “you gonna let me have you pretty girl?” He asked dropping his head to your neck as he began to nip at your skin taking in the taste of the beer.
A whimper left your lips as you pressed your thighs together “you have me Lu.” You nodded as the pool within your panties became far too much for you to handle “fuck who knew I needed to kiss you to get you like this?” The hockey player teased dropping his hand between your legs letting his fingers dance against your thighs.
He watched in awe as you bit your lower lip “fucking do it before I find someone else.” The warning made his eyes go sharp “like who?” Luca didn’t want for your response as he began fiddling with your panties “Nick.” A penny dropped in his mind as Luca ripped the fabric that covered your cunt like it was nothing “Luca!”
Your groan echoed off of the walls as the boy laughed “c’mon you know I’ll get you another pair if that’s what you were worried about sweets.” Luca clicked his tongue as he finally pressed his fingers against your cunt.
You shuddered at his touch feeling himself drive his fingers up and down your slit “you’re fucking soaked.” He gasped into your ear before he went to suck at your ear lobe “please.” You whimpered pushing your hips closer to him.
Luca rolled his eyes as he began letting his lips nip at your skin. Your eyes screwed shut as you were lulled by his actions. His lips moved down your chest as he kissed between the valley of your breasts “just fucking do something god.” You grumbled as you were ready to unclip your bra for him to speed it up.
The boy shook his head as be smiled “you gonna let me taste you before you start acting like a brat?” Luca quipped back making you nod your head repeatedly as though he couldn’t see you.
He didn’t take long as he dropped to his knees hooking his hands under your legs pulling you closer to the edge of the sink “such a pretty pussy.” The hockey players mumbled kissing up your thighs as he made sure to not miss a spot “god please.” You begged feeling his breath against your cunt.
Time seemed to stop as your body almost double downed in pleasure when his tongue lay flat on your slit “that’s how I got to shut you up?” Luca clicked his tongue as he let out a chuckle. The boy squeezed your legs as he moaned at the mere tug of your hand through his hair.
His tongue focused on your clit like you were his last meal “right there.” You mumbled rolling your hips against him. As his cock now hurt in his boxers Luca didn’t even care about it as he watched you have that fucked out look on your face.
In fact he was so focused on you that he didn’t notice the door opening “oh.” Nick looked at the sight with wide eyes and as he spoke it made you use the little energy you had left to look at him “fucking shut the door!” Luca groaned replacing his tongue with his thumb on your clit.
Nick was quickly brought back to wart as he was reminded of the fact that there was a party literally on the other side of the wall “c’mere Nick.” You cooed curling your finger in your direction as you looked at him “we won’t bite.” You added letting your lips form a loose smile.
He nodded finally shutting the door making the effort to lock the door “this what you wanted baby?” Luca teased pulling his head back to your cunt where he went back to his meal “wanted to both.” You confessed making Nick smile as he finally walked over to you.
You watched Nick as he cupped your jaw “want to kiss you.” You mewled as Nick finally listened to you. His lips were rough against yours as you melted at his touch.
Luca couldn’t help it as he pinched your hip reminding you that he was still there “fuck!” You groaned pushing your head against the mirror “enjoying this baby?” Luca teased bringing you back to the image of him between your thighs.
Nick continued to kiss down your neck as he sucked at your sensitive skin “so much.” You whimpered as the boy reached behind your back with one hand to unclasp your bra. Both boys looked in awe as your breasts were freed from their constraints as your bra was thrown to the floor “you been hiding these from us?” Nick let out a grunt as he rolled your nipple between his fingers.
The room grew hot as you had one nipping at your breast and the other between your legs “you see how fucking needy she is for us?” Luca’s rough voice had you shivering as your thighs squeezed his head “can’t wait to see what she’s like around a cock.” Nicks vulgar words made Luca laugh as he kissed your cunt.
His tongue lashed against you and with each swipe your strength wavered “more?” You whimpered now infatuated with the idea of both boys sending you over the edge as their cocks stuffed your cunt and your mouth. Nick seemed to be on the same wavelength as you as he nodded “go make a mess on his tongue pretty girl and then I’ll let you get a taste okay?” The freshman watched in awe as your hair began to stick to the back of your neck from swear as your body shook almost overwhelmed from the pleasure you felt “Lu I’m gonna come.” You announced and you swore it only made him increase the pace of his tongue.
Feelings overwhelmed you as your mouth fell open yet it seemed that not a single sound left your lips as your eyes rolled back “fuck she’s a needy little thing huh?” Nick laughed as he kept his hands on your shoulders forcing your body to stay still as you came “fuck off!” You groaned making him scoff “gonna make you wish you didn’t say that.” Luca was too focused still lapping up the taste of your release to even notice that Nick had his hand pressed against the shell of your ear as he whispered.
As you tugged on Luca’s hair once more he finally pulled away as he was reminded of the fact that he wanted at least one more orgasm out of you. A smirk laced his facial expressions as his chin glistened from your juices that had made a mess on his face “you’ve got such a sweet fucking cunt.” Luca announced as he ran his fingers through your folds separating them in the process “look at how soaked she is.” Nick swore he had gone to heaven when he got the chance to look at you.
A look of almost shame found itself on your face “all for us isn’t it baby?” The freshman spoke in a hushed tone that had you just about ready to roll over and turn into a puddle “I need your cocks.” You groaned as the sudden feeling of Lucas fingers teasing your hole and Nick’s thumb on your cunt growing too overstimulating for you.
That was all it seemed to take from you to have Nick helping you off of the sink as you stood up straight “who do you want first?” Luca palmed his boner through his pants “want him in my mouth.” Your eyes locked with Nick as the image of Luca between your legs became just as strong.
The movements were quick, like in the blink of an eye and you were between both boys with Nicks hands around your neck and Luca’s one pinching into your hip “god you don’t know how much I’ve wanted this.” Luca felt like he forgot to breathe as he guided his cock to your clit spreading his precum over the sensitive nub as he teased your slit.
Your mouth far too occupied to complain though as Nick had his lips against yours. If this was any other moment Luca could have possibly found it in his heart to see the boys joy in the fact that Nick was finally getting with the girl of his dreams. But as you paid little attention to Luca it made him grow jealous, so with that he didn’t hesitate to slam his hips against yours as he gave you little time to adjust to how your walls swallowed his cock “fuck!” You moaned almost watching your legs give out as surprise mixed with amusement and you began to feel your mind go numb.
You let your hand brush down Nicks torso as it slid beneath the drawstring of his shorts “you want me that bad princess?” It took everything from Nick to not pass out in that very moment as he watched your eyes go full as your breasts bounced each time Luca bottomed you out.
It seemed that Nick was no longer going to try to have you in his tough guy act as he instead gave you what he wanted pulling his boner from his boxers as he let it hit his pubic bone “bro you should have gotten this pussy.” Luca groaned as he slapped your ass.
As your mouth fell open Nick took the opportunity to slide his cock into it “there you go pretty girl.” The freshman cooed as he clutched his fingers into your hair as it made you moan out in pleasure “think this is what she wanted all along?” Luca asked as the squelching sounds of your cunt that mixed with the sounds of your gags were like music to his ears.
You couldn’t help but let your cunt clench around him as your walls squeezed his length as you attempted to look up at Nick “looks like you fucking love being our little slut don’t ya?” When you didn’t answer him his hand tugged at your roots unintentionally making you open your mouth wider “hmm.” Your voice came with an inaudible moan that sent vibrations through Nicks body.
Luca let out a grunt as you hadn’t let up on the squeeze around his cock “fuck sweets if you don’t loosen yourself I’m not gonna last.” The warning made you whimper as you swirled your tongue around Nicks cock forcing your back to arch as you tried to take most of his cock forcing yourself to breathe through your nose.
This new angle also meant that Luca was hitting a further spot within you and with that came even more pleasure for all three of you as your throat loosened as the strain on your neck softened “think she deserves her second?” Nick had pushed his fingers to the base of your scalp forming a makeshift ponytail to get better control of his thrusts as he fucked your face.
The Fantilli boy shook his head as he heard you moan at the offer “no I think little sweets here should make you come first.” His words came with his hand on your clit like a bit of encouragement to get you to make him last longer than his younger teammate.
Your eyes were close to rolling back into your head as you gasped swirling your tongue around Nick’s cock like your life depended on it “don’t stop pretty girl.” The coo had your legs shaking as you were left certain that without Luca hand gripping at your hip you would have had your face in the floor “I’m gonna come fuck!” Nick let out a groan as he let his cock slide out from your mouth before his hand replaced where your tongue was “open those pretty little lips f’me.” As his hand began to jerk himself of Nick finally hit his release.
He watched in awe as the warm sticky ropes of his release shot from his aching cock and began to paint your lower face and even found as far as to land on your collar bones only making you moan louder as you felt it. Luca kept his hand locked in your hair as he kept your face from dropping “you close sweets?” The boys wanton expression made you mewl as his other hand stayed pressed against your stomach forcing you to feel how deep his cock went in your cunt.
A flurry of incoherent words flew from your lips as you nodded “so big.” Was the only thing that either of them could understand “is that a yes princess?” Nick let out a grunt as he found his lips hovering over yours as he took the moment to see the mess he had made on your skin “please.” The relentless pounding of Luca’s cock had your legs shaking as your ears rang.
The boys laughter taunted you “know you can beg better than that you.” Nick clicked his tongue as he pecked your lips watching your eyes flutter “want to make a mess for you please.” You whimpered feeling your cunt throb around his teammates cock “let yourself go then pretty girl.” As Luca huffed the words out wondering how much longer he could last within the bounds of your heavenly cunt.
You didn’t need to be told twice as Nick let your lips go as your moans echoed off of the walls as Luca’s orgasm was brought on by yours “right there sweets.” The sophomore grunted as his cock coated your walls fucking you through your orgasm.
Your chest heaved as you came down from it still feeling your core full as his thumb drew faint circles on your clit “enough.” You squirmed feeling a level of sensitivity build up between your legs once more “since you asked so nicely sweets.” Luca teased sliding his cock out of you letting you fall into Nicks arms.
The younger boy placed a kiss to your head as he smiled “Luca you in there!” Rutger groaned as he knocked on the door reminding the three of you that the party was still coming on downstairs.
Luca couldn’t help but groan as he watched Nick smirk “yeah.” Luca raked his fingers through his hair “we’re downstairs playing beer pong so hurry up!” the blondes words made a smile form on your face as you laughed “maybe leave the girl in there though.” He trailed off making your eyes go wide as you were reminded of the fact that they could hear you.
The Fantilli boy sighed as he pecked your lips reaching down for his shorts that were on the floor “stay with me?” You croaked out throat still raw as you looked at Nick.
He nodded as he lifted you back onto the sink as you both watched the older boy leave before Nick locked the door again “how are you feeling pretty girl?” The words made you smile as a giddy feeling built in your chest “this your version of after talk?” You let out a laugh as you watched him walk over to you.
The way his eyes stared at you made you feel so exposed, even as you were naked “liked making a mess on you.” He confessed as he brushed his fingers over your collarbone when he smiled.
Your hand was as placed over his as you nodded “it doesn’t have to end there Nick.” Your proposal made his ears perk up in surprise “what do you mean?” He mumbled as you cupped his face letting your hands squeeze his cheeks.
His eyes intently stared at yours as he waited for your answer “just that I wanna spend just a little more time with ya Nicky.” You cooed letting your lips hover over his “don’t know if I can do it.” His confession made you frown as he feared he had done the wrong thing “you trust me to walk you through it?” Your strong demeanour was replaced by this soft one.
A smile sat strong on his face as he nodded “have me just how you want me tonight.” Nick mumbled as you were fully in control of him. He was surprised as he watched you tug at his shirt “then it’s not fair that I’m the only one who is naked.” There was a hint of amusement in your words as you helped him get rid of his shirt and his shorts.
Just like before Nick was attractive to you as you couldn’t help but smile “you’re such a pretty boy.” You cooed letting your saliva drop to his cock as you began to run your hand up his length as you pumped his cock in an attempt to get him hard again “just for you.” Nick groaned as you kissed his lips reminding him of the fact that he was now the centre of your attention.
It took a few more pumps of your hand for him to grow hard again and you did a few more just to tease him “I’m not gonna last if you keep doing that.” He gasped letting his teeth sink into your shoulder as his cock began to throb in your hand as the precum oozed from his tip “watch this f’me pretty boy.” You ordered feeling a sense of power over the boy as he nodded practically lapping up your demands like they were nothing.
You drove the swollen head over your clit making you both shudder in the process “please.” Nick whined desperate to have more of you “since you asked so nicely.” You teased sliding his cock down your slit before you let it slowly slide into your cunt.
The air around you both grew warm as you both watched how your soaked pussy swallowed his cock like it was nothing “fuck!” You gaped biting down on your lip as you saw his pubic bone hit your clit as your legs went up on either side of him to accommodate him.
A smile formed on his face as he let out a little laugh “you good princess?” He asked as he let his hands setting on your hips “think I should be asking you that.” You quipped back finally losing your strong expression as he pinched the flesh of your ass.
It made him roll his eyes as he began slowly pulling his hips away from you before he brought them back “you can go harder pretty boy.” You mumbled wrapping your arms around his neck.
The thought was hot in your brain as you realised that Nick was fucking you with Luca’s come as his lube since it still coated your cunt “you still so needy after all that?” Nick let out a dry laugh as he began to taunt you “f’you.” You swore your brain was being rewired as it only made his confidence grow.
Nick began to pick up his pace as he nipped at your throat “was waiting to get you like this.” The freshman revealed as his voice was a low rasp “had to watch you be his girl.” He grumbled making his efforts stronger as it caused your breasts to bounce with each thrust.
A low moan left your lips “wanted to have you be all mine but you just had to be a little slut and want us both huh?” Part of you was surprised at how vocal he was “wanted to be your girl too.” You mewled bringing your hand between you two as you began to rub at your clit still feeling sensitive from your first two orgasms.
The sound of your squelching cunt echoed off of the walls “you get to show me that now.” Nick had been jealous the entire night having to fight Luca for every bit of your attention and he had now grown tired of it.
His cock pulsed in your core as his hands kept you planted on the counter “you’re so big.” You whined locking your legs on Nicks hips “should have let you fuck me in Chicago.” He tensed at the mention of your home city but as it made you moan he thought he was unnoticed.
Nick grew tired of kissing your neck as he swatted your hand away from your clit as he replaced it with his own “you don’t know how long I have been thinking about this pretty little cunt of yours.” You clenched around him as you heard his words “but I think you already knew how good you are.” He scoffed pinching your skin as he knew how the other guys were around you.
You were keeping your eyes screwed shut as you felt your stomach tighten “I’m gonna-“ the words couldn’t leave your lips before Nick cut you off “fucking hold it.” The hockey player growled having other things in mind for you.
A whimper was stuck in your throat “you wanted to come then you have to fucking beg.” Nick spat as his free hand was pressed up against the mirror behind you.
If this was any other moment you would have put up a fight but as your cunt was clenched and your body was close to losing it “I just want to be your little slut Nick.” You announced pressing your head against the glass behind you “make a mess on your cock and make you feel so fucking good.” Your promise made him smirk as he kissed your lips letting his teeth nip at your lower lip “make that mess.”
It was as though the heavens opened as you swore you heard the sounds of prayer bells playing in your ears “don’t fucking stop please.” You begged using the little strength that you had left to writhe your hips against him “come in me.” The words left your lips washing away any nerves that the boy might have had.
The room felt warm as your eyes fluttered “shit shit shit!” You chanted as you came clenching his cock as you spurred in his orgasm “right there!” Nick gritted as he continued to fuck you through your orgasm.
As he finally slowed down Nick watched your chest heave “you okay pretty girl?” His voice was soft as he kissed your cheek letting his cock slide out of your cunt “I’m good.” You mumbled as you nodded.
It was sweet as Nick smiled “you want a moment up here or you ready to go down?” He asked as he reached down for your panties “let’s go.” You felt your heart grow full at the gesture and you were going to be excited to learn that his levels of aftercare would only grow to improve from that night onwards.
You had felt weird the last few weeks. Sure the memory of that night was on replay in your mind as you started seeing the boys more frequently, both together and alone. So like any normal and responsible young adult you googled your symptoms and found three different things you could have been going through. One was something that you were about thirty years too young to be experiencing, the second was one you hoped it wasn’t. And the third was one you could have proven wrong with the simple action of peeing on a stick.
Truly you thought it was going to be nothing. Which is why you didn’t mind waiting for those three minutes to run right by. Of course though luck was never meant to truly be on your side as this was college and what better way to add stress to your life than a baby. But it didn’t end there, you didn’t even know who the father was because you had been sleeping with two guys who were also best friends.
So as the two thick lines stared back at you as though it was trying to mock you, you couldn’t help but groan “fuck!” As you slammed the test on the ground hoping that it would erase your current reality.
That wasn’t going to work though as this baby wasn’t going anywhere and you had somethings you needed to figure out, starting with whose goddamn baby, were you carrying?
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kiryoutann · 6 months ago
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Before reading, please check series masterlist to read the warning(s), disclaimer, and to make sure you’re on the right chapter. Minors do NOT interact.
If you enjoy this, you can buy me a Ko-fi :) Likes, reblogs, and comments are greatly appreciated!
TRIGGER WARNING: PAST SUICIDAL IDEATION, attempts of physical abuse (throwing objects), basically reader's mother being a really horrible narcissistic abusive person.
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[Please read while listening to this.]
Listen to that. The opening strains of that old Elvis classic began to swell; a hush fell over the assembled guests. All eyes were drawn to the dance floor where Sabrina now stood, radiant in her lovely gown, and Andrew looked at her with such veneration, as if she had hung the very moon in the sky. In the arms of her now-husband for their first dance as a married couple, the newlyweds shone brighter than the stars outside the manor.
Sabrina’s cheeks flushed rosier than any wine—joy, adoration, and yes, a little champagne too—had left her glowing in a way you’d never seen before this man came into her life, and your heart swelled with happiness for her.
When at last the song ended and they shared a lingering kiss, you joined the room in applause. Someone handed them a mic, and the two tried to pass the mic to each other until Sabrina was the first to give a speech. Andrew squeezed her hand, gave her an encouraging smile, and nodded.
Clearing her throat, Sabrina spoke into the mic. “Hi, everyone,” she began, voice ringing out sweet and clear through the speakers. “I just want to say thank you all for being here on this special day. Sharing it with my family and friends who mean so much to me has made it truly magical.” Another applause returned her gratitude before receding again when she was about to continue.
With misty eyes, Sabrina then turned to her step-father. “I want to thank Jim, for raising me as your own since I was little. You’ve always been the best dad a girl could ask for.”
Then, you watched her smile at her mother. “And Mom, where do I even begin? You've been my rock since day one. From keeping me sane while wedding planning to celebrating with me every step, you know I wouldn't be here without you. I wouldn't be the strong, independent woman I am today without you and Jim. I love you both so much.”
When Sabrina's parents—Jim and Joyce—approached her and gave the couple a big hug, another round of applause arose from the guests. But as Joyce placed a final kiss on Sabrina's cheek before stepping back, the world seemed to dim around you.
Suddenly, everything is so foreign—the image in front of you was never presented to you. Aunt Joyce looks genuinely happy for her daughter, and Sabrina hugs her like she cannot imagine life without her mother—which, at some point in your life, you did believe too. Mother’s words, “You won’t survive without me,” ring like angry bees.
Yet now, the thought of sharing a roof with her again feels unbearable.
Joyce and Sabrina look... uncomplicated, despite your mother's statements about how your aunt wasn't prepared for motherhood. And suddenly, everything feels numb, and you're disconnected.
In your reverie, you missed some of the speeches, only blinking back to reality when Sabrina and Andrew’s enthusiastic cheers echoed through the room. The crowd roared as the romantic notes of the new music played, “Until I Found You” inviting guests to join in the dancing.
As you do at the few parties you’ve been invited to in your entire life, you stay away from the dance floor and become a loyal wallflower. However, this time, with a companion—a better people-watcher than you, Simon. The man sweeps his brown irises around, examining people before one makes him chuckle under his mask.
“Look at that old man, still got it in ‘im, eh?” He commented, his tone tinged with amusement.
Your gaze trails Simon's. Among the dancing couples were your other uncle and aunt, their smiles highlighting the lines on their seventy-something faces, clearly having more life in them than many of the younger ones. You chuckled to yourself.
“Actually, that’s Uncle Mick and Aunt Sarah,” you reply, watching the old couple share a laugh amidst the music. “They’ve been married longer than I’ve been alive. Slow dancing is kind of their forte.”
More people-watching, but you fail to notice how often Simon steals glances at you between his own. And by the luminosity of your eyes, he is drawn like an insect in a blazing fire. His slow, "near-dying" heart has yet to realize the change in him. Simon plays on the edges of the rotting wood.
Straightening his gaze, he strikes up a question: “If that old bugger can still cut a rug, why ain’t the famous ballerina ‘avin’ a spin, eh?”
You couldn’t help but laugh at Simon’s gruff invitation, the sound bubbling up from deep in your chest with a foreign carefree ring that you didn’t recognize. Meeting his eyes, you saw amusement there but also something that told you he was serious. Heart tiptoeing at the edges of your ribs, your fingers busying themselves with their own bustle.
Biting your lip, you gazed up at him through your lashes, feeling a smile curling the corners of your mouth. "I don't know," you shrugged your shoulders. “I might suck at slow dancing.”
Simon scoffed. “Absolute bollocks.”
At his disapproval, your smile widened, teeth peeking out from behind those pretty lips. You gazed up at him, searching for something intently.
Somehow in that moment, the noisy celebration around you seemed to fade into a blur, narrowing your world until it was just Simon standing before you. Your chest warmed, as if caressed by the sun on a lush spring day. Capillaries rushed, painting your bones pink. Pink.
Gathering your courage, you mimicked Simon's invitation. “Unless... you're willing to be the judge of that yourself?”
The question came out just above a whisper, heavy with promise. With your heart dangling at the tip of your throat, anticipation mixed with anxiety gnawed at you faster than any termite. Simon gave a subtle nod towards the dance floor with his chin.
“Come on then,” he rumbled.
As Simon led you, you couldn’t help but feel like Cinderella herself; this room made a fairytale for you. He wrapped his strong arms around your waist, pulling you close so your bodies swayed as one. You shyly wrapped your free hands around his neck.
The romantic music continues to flow, caressing your ears with the singer's warm voice, Stephen Sanchez, if your memory serves you right. The merciless thumping in your ribcage persists, and you wonder if Simon feels it, if he has his own version resonating in the hollow of his chest. Settling into a slow sway, you feel his shoulders relax.
“You’re not gonna turn into a swan on me now, are ya? Would be a right shame to ruin such a lovely dance.” Simon asked, tone lighthearted. After mentioning your upcoming ballet performance, he doesn’t slow down his series of jokes about it.
You threw your head back in laughter. “You know that’s not how the story goes.”
Simon's grin grew wide beneath his mask. Cocking a brow, he said, “Oh yeah? Enlighten me then, love.” He challenged.
Taking a deep breath that lifted the smile still on your face, you began the long story of Swan Lake—about what happened to Odette and her flock by the sparkling lake and mostly things you had memorized many times. "So when Siegfried finally learns the truth, it’s too late—Odette ends her life by jumping from a cliff.”
“Fuckin’ ‘ell,” he reacts, and you let out a girlish laugh. “That’s tragic.”
You shrug. “I always thought it was kind of romantic.” You giggle again—God, the way this man can make you giggle like a silly schoolgirl—when you see the reaction reflected in his eyes.
“You’re a right bloody psycho, you know that?”
You deadpanned. “I’m not a psycho.” Your tone was flat, trying to be serious but the stubborn grin that followed ruined it.
“She should’ve just gone for another bloke.”
You rolled your eyes. “No, she can’t. She’s been cursed to be a swan forever.”
“Then she should’ve just lived out ‘er days as a swan then,” he said with pragmatism, very much lacking the charm of a fairy tale with all those logics. “Should’ve chased that arse’ole prince all over kingdom for revenge instead. Give ‘im a good peckin’.”
You exhaled in exasperation, but your lips held back a smile. “Please just stop talking.”
Simon chuckled, and fortunately, for his own good, he did. The music was nearing its end, but you were still swaying. Something caught his gaze over your shoulder. He looked back at you, raising a brow to make a suggestion.
“Should we do a spin?” he asked.
“What?”
He nods his chin behind you, and you follow suit—a young couple laughing as they twirl. “Should we give it a go?”
It's somewhat whimsical, somewhat absurd, that not only is this hulking man dancing with you, but he also wished to twirl you like you were partners in some grand ballroom. Yet, as you stare into his smiling eyes, you swear there’s a hint of excitement in them. And what good is a ballerina without a performative twirl?
“Okay,” you accepted his offer.
You placed your hand in his, feeling the rough calluses of his fingers but somehow right against your skin. At your subtle cue, Simon raised your joined palms, spinning you outward in elegance and then back into the solid wall of his chest.
“One more time.” You said, and he did as you asked.
You cup his mask-hidden jaw, feeling for each woven polypropylene against your fingers. The plum of your smiling lips swells with desire, and without thinking, you press your lips to his cheek. Your heart skips a beat, gripped by a jolt of trepidation, fear, and regret that perhaps you have crossed a line, that you might drive him away.
But Simon doesn't.
Instead, he seized your waist and drew you close, eliminating any distance between you. The air was snatched from your lungs in a stolen gasp with the force of his possessive move. Like a lover accompanied by passion as he reaps longing.
(I swell with hope, in the sweet desire of a girl seeking love.)
“I’m dyin’ for a smoke.” He confessed.
You glanced around at the lively party still swirling around you. Turning back to him, you suggested, “Should we slip out the back then?”
“Sure.”
Smiling up at him, you gave his hand a gentle squeeze before untangling them from your waist. “You go on ahead—I just need to swap to flats real quick.” You gestured to the high heels that had been enveloping your throbbing toes for hours.
As Simon nodded and turned to go, you hurried off the floor, limping just slightly. The celebratory noise faded as you stepped to the left side of the manor, where the hallway to your room stretched in silence. You turned the doorknob, and the old wood swung with a low creak.
Walking to your suitcase, you flipped it open, took out your Mary Janes, and replaced your high heels with them with a sigh of relief.
Just as you moved to stand, you heard footsteps approaching, then a shadow fell across the open door. Too small to be Simon. Looking up with a start, your heart nearly dropped when you found your mother standing there, arms crossed in a frown full of distaste.
“I've been watching you all night with that… man. You're getting far too comfortable, are you?”
That tone—that same tone that you had heard countless times growing up, signaling the beginnings of an argument. Your shoulders tensed. The pulse inside you quickened as your defenses began to rise, readying themselves in anticipation of the barrage of barbed words that might come next.
The oceans dividing San Francisco and London were supposed to end whatever connection existed between you both—to pretend that it didn’t exist. It should have been a clean finale, allowing you to simply live as a normal girl with normal reactions to everything, as if nothing bad had ever happened to you.
Yet, look, your traitor body is gearing up for battle just the same. Your mind may lie, you may lie, but the wound bearer presents the results of years of being forged beneath her. 5,351 miles stretched, but you are still the same sixteen-year-old girl who bit her tongue, holding her words like a criminal about to be executed on the spot.
What a mother-daughter relationship you have.
You watch warily as Mother begins circling the room, her high heels clicking ominously, slightly showing the red soles beneath them. Louboutins, you remember. You also remember all too well how much those had cost—the very shoes you had “helped” fund years ago when you foolishly still let her access your bank account, even after you turned nineteen.
“Do you know why he’s here?” Mother tries the first question, testing the waters.
Like a frightened little girl—that same little girl from that sunny day so many years ago—you deflect the real question, “Because I invited him.”
Mother, unimpressed, casts you a sharp look, as if daring you to dare her. “You know what I mean. Do you know why he’s here?”
You bit your lip, grasping at straws. “He’s… my boyfriend.”
Mother scoffed mockingly. She turned to you, face contorted in amusement as if you had just told the funniest joke. “Boyfriend? Please. Is that what you think?”
You flinched back as Mother suddenly whirled to face you, her sculpted features twisting into a reflection of pure, unbridled rage. The similar pair of eyes glared at you wide. She buried her nails deep into your epidermis, and you gasped from the sting.
“The only reason a man would want you is between your legs. You think you found love, but really he's with you only because you're easy. You’re just a cheap fuck to him, (Y/N).”
The hot, stinging droplets gathered and spilled over without your permission. You hated yourself for fueling her twisted satisfaction. Hating that she still knew exactly where to aim her barbs to find their mark after all these years.
But nothing compares to the fact that she is your mother. She is your mother, and yet, how could those words come out of her mouth so easily? As if her criticisms had festered within her mind and she was finally allowing them to escape. There's a small, broken part of you that can't help but wonder—and why do you even wonder? You know yourself better than she does, surely.
Or do you?
Or is it true that there really is nothing to take beyond your body like the unloveable, worthless child she always says you are?
You felt a spark of anger flare. “How could you say that to me?” you choked out, baring your wounded heart. Wrong move—you know this, proved many times that showing emotion had never gotten anywhere with Mother before.
But the younger, wounded teenager in you would always crave some kind of validation, some sign she truly cared. Perhaps hidden beneath the person she's become, she still holds a flicker of the warmth she once felt for you. You’re her daughter, and she’s your mother—shouldn’t that be enough for her to finally treat you like one?
“I’m only telling you the truth so you won’t be naive. Do you think he’ll love you when there are so many girls out there who are much prettier than you?”
At times, the wiser you knew not to take Mother’s words to heart—your survival instincts, born of too many experiences, told you not to let her poison seep into your skin. But more often than not, you didn’t know better. Right now, you don’t know better.
(Prying my mouth open, she dripped her bitter blood until we were indistinguishable.)
Clenching your fist, you say through gritted teeth, “You don’t know him.”
Mother’s features bent in hate at your rebellion. The young daughter no more, grown into someone who dared to talk back rather than just gulping down her every word raw.
“And you do?” she spat. “How long have you known this man? Don’t be stupid.”
“It’s none of your business,” you retorted, but not convinced enough for her to see the gap in your expression.
“Not my business? Of course it’s my business – I’m your mother!”
Summoning the last of your courage, you mumbled, “You’re not… my mother.”
Her neat eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “What did you just say to me?”
It was a second chance, one she rarely gave. For a moment, you considered taking it back—rewording your reply to something less confrontational, something safer. But you were sick of it—years of carrying her wounds you hadn’t even caused, weighing your body down and sinking them deeper into pitless hell. Of always looking past her anger and ego, finding justifications and reasons to tolerate her. Of being under her control when the young girl inside you needed her anger represented.
And you repeated it without rewording: “You’re not my mother. Not anymore.”
As it left your lips, you saw a flicker of change in Mother’s expression—was that hurt in her eyes? So foreign was her expression that you almost doubted yourself. Regret seized you along with the guilt and self-loathing that gripped your heart.
Then, the hurt blinked away as if it was never there. “Look at you,” she hissed, “throwing away your mother, the woman who birthed and raised you with great difficulty, all for some worthless man. I'm not even surprised if you end up pregnant in a few months, or maybe you already are. Don't say I didn't warn you when he leaves you with a bastard child.”
And they were right when they said that anger is the most effective key.
Moments ago, you can still find the shadow of that sixteen-year-old girl remains within, with pieces of her innocence—a bit of a child’s grin. Her body is still in fear, yet her eyes are always yearning for praise from her mother’s voice.
However, as the grown woman you are ignites in a seething cauldron of fury—disagreement with Mother’s treatment—the little girl begins to fade, reduced to ashes amidst the fire. The “why” question echoes loudly with demands. I'm your baby—you made me; why do you hurt me?
“Why? Why are you so sure only bad things will happen? Why can’t you believe I can find happiness?” Warm tears welled up, tasting salty on your lips as you asked.
Mother raised a warning finger. “Don’t use that tone with me.”
But you’ve passed the point of backing down. “Why? Why are you so convinced I’ll always be unhappy? WHY?!”
(As if it had been written long before my creation.)
Taking a sharp, short breath, you feel self-control slipping away. Your lungs hitched with condemnation, constricting you, trying to escape the hell Mother handmade just for you. You’re crossing the line; something scolds (the same voice your mother planted early on) inside your head, but you refuse to give in.
The dim red light between the cracks in your skull grows brighter, and the next thing you say are the words you've been holding back for so long:
“I’m not you! And what happened with Dad was not my fault!”
And finally, silence fills the small space between you, followed by the faint echo of your voice. As the last syllable faded, the words that had been spoken left you feeling conflicted. That little girl would consider this disobedience—the result of the doctrine your mother spat at her every day—but all you know now is the strange lightness in your heart, as if shedding a massive burden that you didn’t realize you had been carrying your whole life.
Mother took a sharp, hissing breath, and you saw the subtle quiver in her clenched jaw. “You're out of line,” she said.
“I'm out of line?! You were the first one to cross that line, over and over, hurting me for years, but now that I finally do it to you, now I'm the one who's out of line?!” The words tumbled out of your mouth in a rush, all the pain and anger that you had piled up erupting to the surface. “You've always hurt me, said awful things, made me feel like nothing! But the second I did it to you, suddenly I'm the bad one? That's not fair!"
In the blink of an eye, she extends her perfectly manicured hand to grasp the first object within her reach—a heavy crystal paperweight on the table. Your eyes are glued to it, feet ready to flee when she hurls it at you.
“You fucking ungrateful bitch!” she screamed.
Some distant, rational part of you knows you should dodge. But a darker impulse held you frozen, as if welcoming the blunt object to damage your epidermis and even more so to become evidence of her abuse. And perhaps, once the crimson drips from your split temple, it will be enough to reveal the true identity she has been hiding—to destroy the loving mother image she has carefully built for years.
You will make a spectacle of the wound, perhaps even exaggerating it a bit like Mother always did.
It came so close when it landed on the floor next to you. You let out the breath you didn’t realize you were holding. Mother’s face flushed like the devil as she shouted, “I should never have given birth to you!”
Strange, that relief is what washes over you when her words land in your ears. Because for the first time, the two of you agreed on something – she wished you had never been born, just as you had so often wished the same.
Those “precious” teenage years were filled with alternating fantasies—some days hoping she might die, others wishing it was you instead. But you were never able to go through with killing her, or yourself. Because being without Mother meant being utterly lost and alone, and you were too cowardly to cut your wrist open. More days though, you regretted it—how it might have all ended sooner if only you had been braver.
You wonder who's to blame to just make sense of it—perhaps Mother's mother had been cruel, and she thought she had broken the cycle. Perhaps Joyce, for always being the golden child despite everything. Perhaps Dad. Perhaps you.
All those long, drawn-out years, you stayed, you suffered for her. Because the little girl in the bright pink shoes—the color that matched Mother's favorite dress before she threw it away—loved her mother so much. Always making excuses for her. Maybe she didn't know how to love me, or I didn't understand her way of loving me. Maybe somewhere in her anger were kisses in her own language.
You stood frozen as hollowness spread through your chest, as if the eruption had cleansed you until nothing but an empty clarity remained. Even when Simon entered the room, you didn't notice his presence until he spoke.
“Fuck’s all this?” His question didn’t really wait for an answer as he rushed to your side.
Mother smoothed her hair imperiously, then said: “We were just having a talk.”
Simon’s brown eyes scan the scene: the shattered paperweight, Mother’s suspicious fist. He then turns to examine you carefully, searching for any injuries and only letting out a slight sigh when he finds none.
“Go wait in the car. I’ll sort our things.” Simon orders, and without argument, you nod, walking out of the bedroom.
The room felt heavier with tension after you departed, leaving Simon alone with your seething mother. He moved with purpose, in a quick and efficient mind, as he gathered your things—a toothbrush and hairbrush from the bathroom, dresses from the closet, pulling out drawers for any other items. After throwing them into your suitcase, he tidied up his own things with even more haste and less care.
As he picked up his abandoned tie, Mother cleared her throat. “You don’t need to do this, you know. I know my daughter better than anyone, and she’s not what you really need.”
For a moment, Simon paused, jaw working as he reined his temper. Mother thought she had his attention—finally getting him to listen to her. But soon enough, he resumed his task as if she hadn’t spoken at all.
Undeterred, she pressed on. “There are prettier, worthier girls than her. Ones who won’t cause you so much trouble.”
Simon’s hands stilled at that, Mother thought she had succeeded in making him consider. Slowly, he turned to face the older woman. But what she read in his eyes was not a realization or even a spark of curiosity. No, it was a look that suggested he knew a lot about people like her, had seen a lot despite him being a decade her junior.
“That what you tell ‘er then?” He began, hate raining down like hail in his voice. “That she ain’t good enough, or pretty enough? That she’s nothin’ but trouble?”
The woman met his gaze, and Simon noticed how her eyes were shaped like yours, except colder, full of twisted conviction whenever she talked about you. “I only speak the truth, for her own good. Someone has to keep that headstrong girl in line before she comes to ruin.”
At that, he let out an impolite scoff, but Simon gave zero fucks. “Yeah? Cause all I see is you tryin’ to keep ‘er under yer thumb.”
Simon watched as the woman's face contorted into an ugly frown of dislike; her mask had been abandoned somewhere. He wondered how you survived all those years at home, how you could still say you “love her to bits” on your first meeting.
But he supposes that’s how children are. Misplaced unconditional love for their lifegivers. Sometimes, his critical mind thinks it’s a shame for the Man in the Sky to give little humans to people who don’t deserve them—to abusers, addicts, snakes like this one right here. But then again, Simon had no right to complain when he stopped believing in any of all that years ago—after he lost everyone that mattered.
"I'm her mother." She repeated.
“And she’s yer daughter. Not yer pet or yer little dog to order about.”
As Simon returned to tending to the bags, the woman took a slow, deep breath. "I know men like you," she replied. “You think you're protecting her—you think you're saving her, but all you want is a girl to use and toss aside once you've grown bored.”
Simon’s tedious task came to a halt, the zipper of the bag half-open. He furrowed his blond brows, brown eyes focused on nothing. Before long, he gathered the bags and shouldered them, his free hand dragging the suitcase as he walked through the gaping door. That woman spoke again, but he turned a deaf ear to her venomous spit.
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mssorceressupreme · 9 months ago
Note
Hiii
I heard your requests were open 👀👀👀
Your writing is sooo amazing, it's addictive, like I can't get enough 😩🤚
Could I request a Minho X reader, reader is from Maze B, superrr close with Aris, and she's confident, sassy, sarcastic, loud and laughs a lot, total morale booster, she also cracks a lot of that's what she said jokes.
Since she's close W Aris, the boys might get the wrong idea and think they're a thing, but they clarify they're not lmao
You can ignore this request if you want, I just think you write so good, and so many people would love to read smth like this, I feel like some authors forget they're just teenagers ykwim?
It's so nice to see active Maze Runner blogs, especially when they write so bomb like you 😘
I hope you have a good day, never stop writing ♥️♥️♥️
Of course love, I’d be more than happy to write this for you 🥹❤️❤️❤️ Thank for the kind words, it really keeps me motivated, you’re such an angel 😭😭🫶🏼🫶🏼 Hope you have a great day too lovely!! 😘🥰 (also so sorry for the delayed post, I’ve been so busy with assignments lately 😭 I hope this satisfied your prompt 💓)
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Who is She?
Pairing: Minho x Reader
Summary: Sparked with curiosity, Minho follows you one day. And your relationship takes a turn.
Warnings: none really, it’s a sweet imagine I like to think
——
The dining hall was a strange blend of sterile and vibrant. It was filled with chatter and the clinking of cutlery, the usual dinner routine. To you it was the most ‘normal’ atmosphere in this whole facility, the only time you felt sane. At least people weren’t shoving needles in your face, or interrogating you.
At one of the tables, the boys from maze A—Thomas, Minho, Newt, Frypan and Winston—sat together, their eyes scanning the room occasionally while engaging in conversation.
They were still trying to figure this new place out, especially the people in it. One of those people was you, confident in spirit and as sassy as can be, currently sitting with Aris. But they didn’t know his name, he was just a quiet kid to them, or your “boyfriend”, or so they thought.
“Whatever, I could take on 50 of those guards at once, they look like they’ve got no balls.” You sneered, while chewing on your food.
“Keep it low Y/N, we don’t want anyone overhearing us.” Aris warned.
“If I could set this whole place on fire, I would, but Stella won’t let me do shit. Don’t you think it’s time we try to escape?!” You huffed. Stella, one of the girls from maze B, was the bossiest girl you’ve ever came across. (aka the Gally of Maze B, before his redemption lol)
Mind you, she’s only alive to this day because you saved her from a griever…unfortunately. Sometimes you wished you left her in the maze.
Aris sighed, he too, disliked Stella. “Anyway, you should eat up. You’ve barely eaten since we got here.”
You slide your plate over to him, “Today’s your lucky day, I’m not hungry.”
He shrugged and began indulging in this second helping. Aris wasn’t much of a eater but boy, this is the first time you guys have had real food and he wasn’t going to turn down the opportunity.
“Look! An opening, I’m going to check it out.” You whispered, standing up as the guards walked away from their previous post.
“Y/N! Get back here!” Aris whisper-yelled, but you were determined to get through the other side of that door.
——
“Where is she going?” Minho observed as you made your way towards the door.
“Who?” Winston swiftly turned around, accidentally knocking over a cup of water in the process.
Newt chuckled, while Minho pressed his lips together. “Sorry, Minho!” Winston exclaimed, grabbing napkins.
“You’re alright man. I’ll be back.” Minho gave Winston a reassuring back tap, before leaving to find the bathroom. Or, maybe he just wanted to follow you.
——
You managed to get past the doors. This was a way easier attempt than anticipated, you thought to yourself but shrugged it off.
However, you couldn’t help but feel like you were being followed. Regardless, you didn’t care, the only thing that mattered was finding out what these people were really behind.
You halted your tracks, observing your surroundings. It seemed to be a never ending grey hallway with millions of doors, great, that makes it sooo much easier for you doesn’t it!
As Minho turned a corner, he bumped into you, nearly knocking you over.
“Woah, watch it!” You exclaimed, steadying yourself.
“Sorry, I didn’t see you there!” Minho was quick to defend himself.
You furrowed your brows, the newcomer from maze A. “Were you…following me?”
Minho scoffed, “Pft of all the people here, why’d you think I’d follow you.”
You shot him a look, “Oh come on, I’ve seen you newbies. You guys watch Aris and I like a hawke.”
One of the doors dinged, about to open, so Minho quickly reacted by pulling you by the waist into one of the tiny cracks in the hallway walls, adequate enough to fit two people.
“Stop touching me!” I grunted, pushing his hand away.”
“I’m barely even on you!” He retorted.
“Why were you following me anyway?!” I whispered, “You shouldn’t be here.”
“I had to use the bathroom! I’m wet if you can’t tell!” He responded, but it came out a bit too wrong. Minho immediately regretted how that sounded.
You held back your laugh, “That’s what she said.”
With a tiny bit of banter, Minho managed to break down your walls, all too quickly, something you weren’t really used to.
“So what are you up to anyway? Sneaking around like you own the compound.” Minho smirked, while keeping an eye out for any guards.
“I’ve seen them move bodies in and out of here like clockwork. Aris and I don’t trust these people.”
Minho’s eyes narrowed. “Oh yeah? You should get back to your boyfriend then. I don’t think he’d be pleased to know you were in a confined space with another man.”
You rolled your eyes, “Oh, no. Aris isn’t my boyfriend. He’s more like a brother to me.”
There was a moment of silence as you stared at each other, the air thick with tension. Before either of you could say more, you heard footsteps. A guard was coming your way.
Minho quickly grabbed your hand and pulled you into what seemed like a nearby closet, closing the door behind you. You stood close together in the dark, barely daring to breathe.
The guards footsteps echoed past you and faded away, earning an exhale from the both of you.
“That was close,” You whispered, “and wow here we are in another ideal place to be in right now.” Boy, you are one sarcastic girl, Minho thought.
“I know I love it here.” Minho’s breath warm against your neck.
In the confined space, your proximity made every small movement noticeable. He could feel the heat radiating off you, and your scent was intoxicating. You looked up at him, your eyes reflecting the dim light filtering through the cracks in the door.
“Why did you really follow me?” You asked, voice soft but filled with curiosity.
Minho hesitated, then decided honestly was the best approach. “I don’t know. I guess I was curious. You seem like someone we could trust, Thomas doesn’t trust the people here either.”
“Thomas?”
“Grey shirt, brown hair?” Minho described him, hoping I would recognise him.
“Ah yes, I saw his little incident yesterday. Attempting to fight a guard in the dining hall is daring, he’s got some balls.”
“Sure does.”
“You seem to know the place really well, we could learn a thing or two from you.” Minho added.
You smiled, a genuine one that made Minho’s heart skip a beat, “Well, maybe we both have a lot to learn about each other.”
Minho could see the flicker of something more in your eyes, a spark that mirrored his own feelings. He leaned in slightly, feeling the magnetic pull between them.
Before anything could happen, the reality of your situation came crashing back. You couldn’t afford to get distracted, not with so much at stake.
“We should get back,” you whispered, though your eyes said you didn’t want to move.
Minho nodded reluctantly, “Yeah, we should before anyone finds us here.”
You carefully slipped out of the closet, the hall now silent and empty. As you made your way back together, Minho couldn’t help but feel a new sense of determination.
You were in this together now, and he would do whatever it took to protect you and figure out a way out of her.
“Yo, Aris!” You called out as you re-entered the dining hall. Aris gave you a questioning glance, as you appeared with Minho, you simply nodded, signalling that you were fine.
Minho returned to his friends, who eyed him curiously.
“What happened?” Thomas asked.
“Just…getting to know our new friend.” Minho said, glancing back at you. You were already back at your table with Aris, but you shot him a quick, knowing smile.
Minho then gestured for you and Aris to come join them which you did.
“Don’t be shy, you can sit next to me if you’d like.” Minho smirked, gesturing to the empty seat beside him.
You scoffed, “As if.” But you bit your lip, hiding back a smile.
“Careful, her boyfriend might not like that.” Newt warned, glancing at Aris to see his reaction.
“Oh no no, we’re not a thing.” Aris was quick to respond, “She’s like a sister to me.”
You chuckled, “Besides, I’m more into leaders, I like a guy who can lead.”
“Someone like me?” Minho teased.
You rolled your eyes, “Yeah you wish. Who was the one leading you around just now?”
“Uh actually, if I can recall, it was me who had the reigns.” He hummed, smiling when he saw you get all worked up.
“Stand down maze boy, this is my terrain. You guys want a way out, Aris and I can help you.”
“Alright, so what’s the plan?” Thomas agreed, leaning in closely.
Minho shot you a smile, and you returned it, thought a bit cocky, he did manage to grow on you or whatever.
And for the first time, you actually felt a spark of hope. With extra manpower, you might be able to break out of this place.
You might be in a dangerous situation, but at least you weren’t alone. And Minho knew deep down, that together, you could face whatever came next, for once, everyone at that table felt hopeful.
The safe haven felt closer, and so did your friendship with Minho. But could this friendship blossom into something more, you often pondered.
Perhaps so.
You smiled, watching as Minho lead the next discussion. You could get use to this, it felt nice to be relaxed and not take the lead for once.
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merrybloomwrites · 2 months ago
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Hope You Feel the Same Way
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Summary: Losing your virginity to Niall Horan from One Direction wasn't the plan, but when the opportunity arises, you're so glad you take it.
Word Count: 2.5K
CW: drinking, p-in-v sex
AN: Thank you to the anon who requested this! Writing this kept me sane during the Eagles vs. Commanders championship game haha
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This wasn’t the plan.
The plan was, wait outside all morning, get a good spot in the pit, scream your heart out to One Direction, then go back to the hotel to sleep.
But no, your friends had other ideas. The post-concert adrenaline fueled the decision to keep the night going. Which is how you find yourself at a club, loud music playing, lights flashing, people dancing up against each other. 
Not exactly your scene.
Your friends have been trying to get you to open up more, get out of your shell a bit and experience new things. Because of this, you try to remain positive. Maybe this won’t be so bad. Sure, your ears will probably be ringing for days, but that could also be blamed on the concert you just left. 
You head to the bar and order a drink, your third of the night. Enough to loosen you up, but not enough to get truly inebriated. Your friends drag you out to the dance floor and you go along, actually letting yourself feel the music and let go.
It’s as you’re finishing your drink that your friend gasps, loud enough to be heard over the loud music. You turn, worried that something is wrong. But it’s clearly the opposite.
As you follow her gaze, you see the group that’s just walked in. You’re all speechless as you fully absorb the fact the boys of One Direction are here, at the same club, casually starting to mingle with people on the dance floor. 
“Just act cool,” Mari says. “If we’re chill we won’t scare them away.”
“You are the least chill out of all of us,” Roma answers. 
“I know. I’m telling myself,” she replies, causing you all to laugh. 
It’s that moment, when you’re mid laughter, then you turn and lock eyes with none other than Niall Horan himself.
You blush furiously and turn away, taking deep breaths to remain cool, just like Mari said.
And by some grace of god, it must work. Because a minute later, Niall starts making his way over to your group. 
“Can I have this dance?” he asks you. Okay, no beating around the bush then.
“You can,” you reply, sounding five thousand times more confident than you feel. One of your friends must take your empty glass from you, because your hand is now empty. Or it is for a second until Niall gently takes it, leading you deeper into the crowd on the dancefloor.
He guides your arms to loop around his neck, and his hands find your waist, gripping gently. There’s still a bit of space between you, and you appreciate it, wanting to ease yourself into whatever it is that’s happening. 
The two of you dance, feeling the music and swaying to the beat. After a song or two leans in, and says into your ear, “Turn around f’me.”
You do as he asks and this time, he pulls you flush against him. Your back presses against his front, and his hands move first to your hips, then run back and forth along your belly. 
Each touch is electric, your skin feeling on fire while butterflies erupt throughout your entire body. He rests his head on your shoulder then starts to press gentle kisses to your neck. It’s unlike anything you’ve ever experienced before, and it’s happening with none other than Niall Horan. You cannot believe this is happening to you.
After a few more minutes of this sensual dance, he says, “Why don’t we take this somewhere more private?”
You mind reels, knowing the unspoken implication of his question. You’re nervous, having never been intimate with someone before. But you cannot turn this down. Sure, you always thought that the first time you have sex would be with a long term boyfriend, but that’s only because everyone says that’s what you should do. So screw that! 
“Okay. I’ll just let my friends know,” you say.
“Tell them you’ll be at the Wilshire, that’s where we’re staying,” he instructs.
You nod and then the two of you make your way back to where you’d last seen your friends. You’re happy to see them chatting with Zayn and Liam. You and Niall explain that you’re heading back to the hotel. It’s obvious to everyone what’s happening, but you truly don’t care. Mari gives you a serious look, asking if you’re sure, and you reassure her that this is what you want. 
“We’ll be tracking your phone,” Roma says, loud enough for Niall to hear, a clear warning not to pull any shit. 
Once that’s settled, Niall leads to a car waiting outside. The tension is palpable for the whole journey, but neither of you say anything or make a move. You’re nervous, of course, but excited, looking forward to the possibilities of what’s going to happen next.
Arriving at the hotel, Niall keeps an arm around your waist as you make your way up to his room. It’s surprisingly neat inside, which you attribute to him never settling down enough to unpack. He flicks on a lamp and turns off the main light, leaving the room bathed in a gentle glow. 
You stand there, waiting for Niall to take the lead, which he happily does. He comes up to you, his hands caressing your face before cupping your cheeks. Slowly, he leans in until finally, his lips are on yours. He’s gentle, and it’s nice kissing him. You feel pleasantly warm as his mouth slides against yours. You part your lips just enough to invite him in, and he happily slides his tongue in, leading to an intense makeout session. 
When you pull back for air you take in his flushed cheeks, his swollen lips, and you feel proud that you led to him looking like this. 
“C’mon, let’s get comfortable,” he says, taking your hand and walking you to the bed. You lay down, and he rests on top of you, picking up where he left off. As he kisses you, his hands slip under your shirt. 
“Can I take this off?” he murmurs against your lips.
“Yes,” you reply breathlessly. He helps you out of your clothes, leaving you in just your bra and panties. You feel exposed, but only for a second, since he quickly removes his shirt and pants as well until he’s equally undressed, his briefs the only clothing left on his body. 
You hope that you’re not drooling as you look at him, appreciating every inch of skin revealed to you. Reaching out, you run your fingers down his chest, feeling the muscles there, and truly taking your time to enjoy this. 
When you can’t wait any longer, you pull his face back to yours, leading the kiss. Niall presses his body against you, and you can feel his hard length, separated from your core by only two flimsy pieces of fabric. He starts grinding against you as he moves to kiss and bite at your neck. 
You throw your head back, letting out a moan that’s unlike any noise you’ve ever made before. The kisses move lower, down to your chest, and you arch your back, inviting him to take off your bra. He does, whispering praises at what he sees before moving to kiss and suck there as well. 
You’re truthfully a mess beneath him, never having felt anything like this before. As the pleasurable sensations run through your body, your hips start to move of their own accord, canting up to meet Niall’s, subconsciously inviting him to take the next step. 
His lips move lower and lower, until they ghost across the waistband of your underwear. After checking in with you, Niall slides the fabric down your body. Before turning back, he removes his underwear as well, leaving both of you completely naked. 
“Beautiful,” he says when he looks at you, and you try to cover up, but his hands gently move yours away. “Don’t hide, love. Let me see you. That’s it, gorgeous.” It’s nice how much he compliments you. But now that you’re getting closer to actually having sex, the nerves start setting back in.
You try to brush that off as Niall kisses and caresses you again, but he can tell how tense you’ve become. Pulling back he looks at you, his brows furrowed in concern.
“Everything alright?” he asks.
“Yea, totally fine,” you reply, but even you can tell that wasn’t convincing at all.
“Talk to me. Tell me what’s going on,” he implores.
You take a deep breath, sitting up on the bed, and admit, “I just haven’t done this before.”
“What, had sex with a member of a boyband?”
“Or with anyone.”
“Oh.” He pulls back a bit more, and you regret being honest. This is it, the moment you ruin everything and he sends you away, both of you disappointed.
“Well, that's alright,” he adds. “We can stop if you want. But I promise to be gentle if you want to continue.” 
“You don’t care that I’m a virgin?” you question.
“Care? Of course not. Honestly I’d be honored to be your first. I’m just glad I know so I can, you know, help you through it.”
You smile and reply, “You’re a really good guy.”
“I do try my best,” he says with a laugh. “Do you want to keep going? If not, we can order room service and watch trash TV.”
“As fun as that second option sounds, I’d like to keep going.”
“Perfect. We’ll save that plan for later,” he says, winking. “Wait here one second, I need to grab a couple things.” He presses a kiss to your forehead and hops out of the bed. He rummages through a bag before coming back, holding what you recognize as lube and a condom.
You try not to blush at the sight of those objects, but it’s clear to Niall that you’re still feeling shy. He vows to make this good for you. He may be a popstar, able to have any girl he wants, and he has had a few one night stands at this point. But he knows he’ll remember this night, remember you, and how special this moment is. 
“Just relax, and let’s have some fun,” he says. “Oh, and please speak up if anything feels weird or you want to stop. Seriously, if you want to stop at any point, for any reason, we stop, no questions asked. Got it?”
“Got it,” you reply, feeling so much more at ease now. 
“Do you want me to explain as we go?” he asks.
“I mean, maybe warn me before you stick it in, but no need to narrate it,” you answer, causing both of you to laugh, effectively breaking the remaining tension. 
“Will do!” he exclaims.
You both chuckle and then Niall casually rests his hand on your thigh. His fingers tease against your skin, and he says, “Lay back for me.”
Once you're settled, Niall hovers above you, holding himself up on one arm while his other hand continues to gently stroke your thigh. 
“I’m gonna make sure you’re ready for me,” he says, causing you to tense involuntarily. “Relax, petal,” he says, leaning down to kiss you. You melt as his lips caress yours, and he teases a finger at your entrance. “Can I?” he asks, and you reply with a quiet, “yes.” 
He kisses your neck while sliding a finger in, causing you to moan again at the multiple sensations. “That’s it,” he murmurs against your skin. “Just enjoy it.”
Slowly he adds a second finger, then a third, making sure you’re ready to take him. When he’s satisfied, he moves away for a moment to slide on a condom and coat himself in lube, explaining that he just wants to be extra prepared. 
“You ready? Still sure?” he checks one more time.
“Yes, I want this. Want you.”
At that he smiles, pressing a sweet kiss to your lips before he lines up with your entrance. “I’m gonna start, okay? Just relax and let me take care of you.”
And oddly enough, you are relaxed. You’re not nervous, or worried, but rather just excited. Niall has been such a sweetheart so far, checking in and making sure you’re okay. He has you completely at ease. 
It’s weird at first, the feeling of him stretching you and he slowly slides inside. But also, it feels right. He praises you the whole time, saying how good you’re doing, how well you’re taking him. It’s definitely strange, but you get used to it quickly. Once he’s fully inside he gives you a moment to adjust, but you grow impatient and urge him to keep going.
He starts thrusting, slowly at first but then picks up the pace at your encouragement. Curses fall from both your mouths and he settles into a rhythm that has you seeing stars. You hear him talking about how tight you are, how good it feels as you clench around him. 
Pleasure builds inside you, and the whimpers and moans he’s punching out of you grow in volume. He can tell you’re getting close, and his hand moves to rub circles at your clit to help you reach the edge. 
The two of you lock eyes, and he thrusts one more time, sending you careening into your orgasm. You come with a shout, back arching off the bed as he finishes as well. He works both of you through the waves of pleasure, until you’re too sensitive and he carefully pulls out. 
He kisses you sweetly, then ducks into the bathroom for a moment, throwing out the condom and bringing back a wet cloth to clean you up. Once that’s done he lays next to you, holding you close as you bask in the afterglow. 
It’s nice, but after some time you wonder if he’s expecting you to leave so he can go to sleep. Unsure of how to proceed, you say, “I guess I should get going.”
“What?” he asks, confused. “I mean, you can go if you want to. But I wasn’t joking before when I said we could get food and watch TV after. That’s still on the table. And this is your first time, you should know that post-sex cuddles are truly fantastic. So what do you say, spend the night with me?”
And really, you can’t turn that offer down.
Niall gives you some clean clothes and you head to the bathroom to freshen up as he calls in the order for food. You send a quick text to your friends, assuring them that you’re okay, more than okay, fantastic actually, then make your way back to the bed where you find Niall lounging, now dressed in just a pair of joggers.
As promised, the two of you relax, eating overpriced food and watching trash TV until your eyelids start to droop. Noticing this, Niall shuts the light off and the two of you crawl under the covers. He holds you close, your head resting on his chest. He presses one more kiss to your head, and sings quietly to lull you to sleep.
You know you’ll leave in the morning, and your paths will likely not cross again, but that’s okay. It’s been a perfect night, one you’ll never forget. 
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AN: Thank you for reading! I have a couple more Niall requests & ideas but feel free to send in more requests!
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