#in my mind. ive been watching him for years
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Drew gooden the youtuber not only came into my job today but came right up to me and ordered drinks
#i waved over this group just autopilot bc i saw they were in line. and to make eye contact with basically a celebrity#in my mind. ive been watching him for years#just mind blank#i think i kept it cool and didnt let on that i knew him#he was with his wife and family#but i honestly have no idea#i cant even remember#im not someone who ever gets star struck but to say i forgot everything about bartending. mannnn#very friendly guy tho. genuinely one of the nicest groups i served all night
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I love the show The Librarians but I never can forgive the writers for making an entire episode about Ezekiel Jones going through trauma after trauma, learning so many things and growing so much as a person as he fights through a time loop looking for some way to save everyone, having him succeed in saving everyone but himself, and for his fellow Librarians who only know the last loop to bring him back BUT HE HAS NO MEMORIES FROM HIS TIME IN THE TIME LOOP!
Just a character reset and I was so pissed. They didn't even allude to him actually remembering but pretending not to!
#the librarians#the librarians show#Ezekiel was my favorite character and i loved the moments where they let him be genuine#my guy got an apple that turns you into the worst version of yourself and every other mc nearly destroyed the world when they had it#spent the whole episode saying dont let ezekiel touch it#he finally gets it and nothing happens#only person to willing give it up#and without any world domination plans#also saved a dying kid everyone wrote off#helped a girl who accidentally started a cult after being tricked into using an obsession potion#loves his mom and sisters despite them making fun of him for no longer stealing stuff#he saved Christmas with his mom after she almost ruined it and almost got them melted by santas brother#its been years since ive watched the show#but i still have thoughts if you coukdnt tell by the post and my tag rant lol#dont mind the rambles#Ezekiel Jones
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so REVENGE, HUH? or justice, if that makes you feel better. it tastes the same when cooked just right. 'I REALLY WANTED A BROTHER.' such a shame to burn a bridge you so desperately wanted to keep, especially when it wasnt even you who started the fire. especially when you hope that not a single fragment of that bridge ever washes ashore.[MAY IT ROT FAR FROM MY SIGHTS] an unfortunate loss! atleast he has his friends.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi prime defenders#jrwi prime defenders spoilers#jrwi pd spoilers#jrwi pd#william wisp#vyncent sol#THIS ONE IS FUUUUCKIN OOOOOLLDD RAAAHHHHH i made it like. a year ago. but didnt finish it for so so long bc i just wasnt happy w it.#BUT LIKE A CENTURY EGG the decades of being encased in salt n lime n ash have done WELL to bring out the flavores of this piece#i sorta recently cleaned it up and posted it onto twitty. didnt tag it bc it was SO OLD AND SCUFFED(i see so many MISTAKES NOW)#that i didnt want to expose it to the open air just like that#if i show smth to my small circles then it shall only be understood in those small circles.#open air and open interpretation from minds i cannot predict are NOT something i enjoy the thought of. usually. i am brave tho#BUT EVERYONE ON TWITTY WAS SO NICEEE i was like damn... i guess it IS good enough to be enjoyed by the masses...#lets work on being nicer to our art together. THAT BEING SAID. i really love my colors here HELL YEAHHHH#FIRST TIME IN A WHILE COLORIN THESE BOYS.... i dont use proper color enough..I ALSO RLY LIKE MY BACKGROUNDS HERE#i LOVE when the bg is hyperrealistic (i frankestiened stock photos) and when the subjects are all flat colored n cartoony#recently rewatched Making Fiends and they do that similar thing!! soft shading! lotsa details! almost painted? ill paint one day#ive already rambled so much abt the art im runnin out of ROOm to ramble about WWWIILLIAM GODDAMN WWIIIISP. its been a minute since i saw-#-this episode..but i DO remember the funny smoke trick that will did to his funny brother. EVERYTIME U GIVE AN ORDER. THAT BRINGS HARM-#-INDIRECTLY OR NOT. YOU WILL HEAR THOSE SCREAMS. YOU WILL FEEL THAT PAIN. OHHH WHAT A COOL PUNISHMENT THAT IS#its still an olive branch in a sense! a final chance for big bro bell to show that hes NOT an irrideemable piece o shit. and if not#well. to the wolves of psychosis with him!!! i really think william did the best he could here. if i was in his shoes i have no doubt i-#-woulda done the same. IM ALSO GLAD THAT VYN DECIDED TO STICK AROUND N SUPPORT HIM! thas character development baybe!!#i loooove prime defenders.. its been so long since i watched any eps of it but i KNOW it still has such a grip on my heart..GOTTA rewatch i
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have i talked before about how crazy it drives me that in old bdubs videos he would super abashedly talk about his love for making things pretty? because. it drives me crazy.
at the beginning of mc4 when everyone was clearing out spawn so it was a lifeless flat plot of land to build on and bdubs took it personally and added grass and foliage once everything was built to make the whole landscape more lively and cohesive. and how hed get made fun of for thinking about little shit like that.
also when he got asked what hed be doing if he wasnt doing mc and he mentioned music (i think) and basically was super embarrassed to be like “i know its not very manly, but im super into artsy fartsy stuff”. as if that is a bad thing.
anyway im getting so emo thinking about how in hermitcraft, everyone knows and admires bdubs skill as a builder and its not ever something thats made fun of anymore. thinking about how bdubs never talks down about his own abilities anymore and instead of feeling weird about being a dude whose into artsy fartsy stuff, hes really embraced his career as a creator of beautiful things.
#sorry this post is literally so self indulgent#last rb got to me okay#remembering when i first got into bdubs and id see him in other ppls content and was like ‘oh hes silly haha’#but i didnt actually start watching him until i saw his hc8 base and thought it was one of the coolest things id ever fucking seen in mc#i started watching his videos and the way he talked about block palettes and gradients#and the way hed try things i’d never think could work really blew me away#and hes always been like this#i remember even in hc4 with his modern house#the way he used snow to create a slope was like. mind blowing to me.#ten years after he first did it LOL#hes taught me so much about minecraft as an art medium its fucking crazy#anyway#its been a while since ive gushed about bdubs this feels really good actually#i love him :(#edit: i wasnt gonna say anything when this was a dumb little personal post but ppl are actually rbing it#so i will correct myself#in my tags when i said hc4 i meant mc4#lol
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Continuity errors really are the bane of any long-running tv series huh
#little house on the prairie#i could throw other ones in too like h50 but lhotp is what ive been watching a bunch of lately so#tag rant incoming#because i will never not be irked by charles saying 'its a good thing laura and carrie didnt feel the same way' to albert about albert#coming to live with them when he gets upset over something that happened with james because MY MAN#LAURA DID IN FACT RESENT HIM BEING THERE AFTER A COUPLE MONTHS#(i mean rightfully so he was neglecting her but thats not the point here lol)#albert literally ran away over this. charles. charles PLEASE.#also the tv movies. they are not canon to me okay. he doesnt die young. he goes back years later as a doctor. the end.#(i dont even like the last season but thats still more canon to me than the movies lol)#(there are. many other things too. those are just the eps ive watched recently lol)#anyway#random ramblings#don't mind me
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sorry if there's one thing tumblr user gayedmundo will do it's defend gay eddie headcanons
#this has been my url (on and off) since s5....#ive been manifesting for years now....#even when it was more controversial to think of him as gay#i just remember watching the eddie ana breakup and the cage in my mind with gay eddie in it was finally unlocked#and i was like oh.... i understand him so much more now. he is a perfect character.#and i will defend gay eddie forever bc of that
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so.
#i just remembered todays a year since my uncle passed and like. its been A Day like its been A Few Weeks because its been A Few Months and#its been a few Years and so on.........and then i remembered that at like 9pm.#and i didnt like rmr his birthday bc i was so Worried about forgetting it that i Actually forgot and like.#ive been so focused on doing things w everyone in my family lately to like. Exist w them while i can#like esp going thru so much w my grandma and like helping my dad with her#and like. i think a lot about how my grandma has forgotten so much SOOO much already like its not like im talking to my Grandma anymore#anyways . thats another can of worms#but#anyway all that aside . i feel like . watching him go thru his whole life battling the same shit i do but like he fell so so deep#into his addiction bc his life had so much fucking trauma and like. he literally told my mom before he passed like a few weeks#before he entered a sudden fucking coma that he may have never had any luck w like finding love#(and bad luck isnt enough like his love life was a horror show GENUINELY LIKE#there would be a horror movie about it and itd be so fuckig BLEAK like its so bad) but hes always felt very loved#. so . at least i remembered ?#anyways . ill prolly delete this post later im just . Whoa dude! haha#using my blog as my journal as always dont mind me
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Gene Wilder would have fixed me 🥰🥰🥰
#ive been calling him daddy for years#i hope everyone who watches his documentary gets it now#what an incredible human being#what an artist and brilliant mind#gene wilder#my ex person who is most definitely the love of my life reminded me so much of willy wonka and it was perfect#i miss him so much#i hope i am lucky enough to stumble upon another beautiful gene wilder willy wonka infused soul#genes end of life is so heartbreaking tho#goodness#gonna binge all his movies now 🥰
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#ooouuuugghhhhhhh ive spend the last hour making myself sad :(#whyd i have to go catch feelings for someone who Could Not Give A Shit lol#its a blessing that im moving or i would probably just slowly kill myself for the next year#watching him Very Obviously like someone more than me lol#worst part is everyone knows im just some sadsack sidepiece#and like we were never 'together' so idk wtf im upset about!!!#i could go out and do just as much as he does!!!#but i guess i just wish it had been different and that i had gotten closer w everyone else before i had to leave :(#because now i really feel like i could have been spending way more time w everyone if i had stopped waiting for him to invite me to things#he never invited me to shit anyways!! i was ALWAYS the one to ask 'hey are you free sometime'#EVERY SINGLE TIME#killing him with hammers in my mind#i deserve so much better and i KNOW that but hes hot and smart and has such cool friends#and i just really wanted to be part of that group so badly#and i dont have any relationship expirience i dont know how all of this is supposed to Work i just#i dont know i guess i thought it would be different#anyways im seeing him again tomorrow for what might be the last time#and i wont tell him any of the things i should bc ill see his stupid beautiful face and forget everything i wanted to say#you know this mother fucker wont even help me move? more than an entire year together and he flat out says no to helping me#and i know for a Fact he'll never come visit me#and ill probably drive my stupid little ass down two+ hours just to see him#you know hes got at least two guys willing to drive hours just for him#i need to meet this other guy so we can unionize#cus i guarenteeeee hes probably treating this guy not much better than me#and i say probably the last time bc now itll be reliant on him actually making a fucking effort to see me lol#or itll just be at shows and stuff#not like itll make a big difference cus we onky saw each other once or twice a month ANYWAYS#actually makes me so angry why did i spend so much mental energy on this guy#ILL FIND SOMEONE IN ALBANY WHO ACTUALLY FUCKING LIKES ME JUST YOU GUYS WAIT#btw if i know you irl... ignore this... its shameful...
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sometimes i think about interactions boat and i have had and things he's said to/about me over the years and it makes me feel as though i must occupy some little space in his heart. like i live in his mind rent-free the way he does for me, although not nearly to the same extent lmao.
speak of the goddamn devil i just got a steam notification he's playing tf2
anyway i never thought i'd have that kind of effect on a person, much less my favorite content creator. but it sure appears to be that way, and idk. it makes me feel special. warms my heart n all that :)
#was one of two people to give me their phone number when i had to drop off of discord 2 years ago#never took advantage of it though (shy (also we have different brands of phones so texting probably wouldnt work right#other person was an irl friend (never contacted them either#i remember one time YEARS ago when he was wanting to read jjba on stream or smth like that#him: it's like REALLY not family friendly me: well i shouldnt watch bc i am a Child him: no its ok you dont have to skip It's very dirty th#like guy clearly just wanted me there bc he enjoys my company And he's said he does! i remember him saying he likes seeing me in chat#and once again he was the one that wanted me on the staff team when usually the staff pick new recruits and boat has final say#and apparently he's talked about me to his other friends. that's kinda where the old Time to Mod in-joke started#he was using voice to text to talk to whoever and said my username but the thing misinterpreted it#that coupled with the meme drawing i did that he edited so it's him just saying 'pain'. eventually that dumb fucking image spawned#and then there was the night he spammed it and spam mentioned me in chat when he was streaming while i was ASLEEP#once we were in a vc and he was like 'wow i'd forgotten what your voice sounded like' NEVER heard him say that to anyone else. What#dont even get me started with him and my artwork (man would probably flip tf out seeing what i can do now LOL)#guy literally wanted ME to design an official tff logo but at that point they were kinda slowing down so it never happened#but yeahno i just. ugh. our friendship means a lot to me. i am ITCHING to speak to him again you have no idea#and to just give him a big ol hug. been wanting that for such a long time#quite frankly a friendship dynamic like no other ive seen#dont mind me REMINISCING. im sooo sappy about him he's the most important guy in the world to me#if god exists he knew we'd be too powerful if we grew up together
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Every time I walk
Every time I run
Every time I move
Every time I look
Every time I love
Every time I hope
As always, for us
#this song#this fucking song#i adore it i love it so much#my older sibling streamed 2014 Forest Hills Drive unceasingly when it first dropped#i actually only just recently got into seirously bts but ive kept up with them throught the years#from the jump hope has been such an incredible persormer and artist and i love watching persona grow throughout the years without ever truly#losing that superstar jhope quality#i am so touched by this collab#j coles verse really spoke to me where i am in my life right now#and im so so so proud of and happy for jhope#i know getting to make this collab with one of his insperations must be so huge for him#and they made a truly spectacular song#i really really appriciate j cole for this as well like truly#the american rap scene has always from my perspective welcomed and supported the bts rap line#but this is just above and beyond anything i ever expected to see#only rivaled by the suga juice wrld (rip legend we still feel the loss) collab in my mind#just thrilled with this whole situation so so so thrilled#🥹#bts#bts army#Jhope#j cole#on the street#and now maybe people will start to recognize the hope on the street sweater i got for what it is#This song is the most j hope song to ever exist like this is him his verse feels like a farewell and an ode to j hope i love this songggg#Both of their verses omg the theme of the song is just so like i dont even know i just really appreciate it#those last two are texts i sent my older sister and id like to disscus them deeper at some point#i got a strange type of hunger#the more i eat the more it gets stronger#ive never hit 30 tags before lol
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My experience with Hannibal so far:
Jeff the killer: kills people. Mutilates and eats them too.
Me: Yeah that's alright with me (skipping the eye gore tho)
Jeff the evil liar: evilly lies to someone about the cause of their psychosis
Me: I Am Not Okay With This
#i said this#chem watches Hannibal#okay i have a few theories#first of all my grandmother took a medication that made her hallucinate when i was a kid so i spent#a good amount of time considering the horror of not being able to identify reality#not as much as i spent considering the horror of forgetting or of deterioration but it was present in my psyche#(please keep in mind i was just a kid so a good part of what made this disconcerting to me is that i didnt understand it#and nor did it even seem possible to understand as 9 year olds generally get 0 exposure to info about these issues)#secondly the fact that its a dangerous brain problem#i think ive posted that my parents friend#JESUS CHRIST HIS LAST NAME WAS GRAHAM#anywyas he had epilepsy and died of a seizure when i was a kid#so someone living alone with that sort of problem... personally frightening to me#thirdly it could actually be the lying#every since the stuff with w*s went down ive gone back to being a very highly truth-valuing person#and there are also lots of awful stories abt medicial issues being neglected on tumblr#so the combination of those is v uncomfortable#also the betrayal like I KNOW he's an evil liar but this has been the first time it's doing actual harm to someone who cares about him#it could be even more personal than all that:#will KNOWS there's something wrong with him and he's RIGHT but he's being lied to and told there's no evidence#I've been going through it over the past few years figuring out that most of my mental health issues stem from my period#so i have shared a sense that There's Something Wrong With Me#so it's personally disturbing to imagine being lied to about that and let to rot#could also be that it's evidence that will really has nobody in his corner. except for Bev i guess. <3 bev#the idea that he's truly alone in the world and in a victim position like. hopeless.#also spent a good amount of time growing up thinking about situations so bleak there's no escape. so that kind of thing gets me but i was#always thinking more for a group or a side in a story so like. for one person is even more upsetting. darker than what i'm accustomed to#i could probably keep going i love theorizing#will graham: you won't like me when i'm pyschoanalyzed#me: people only like me when i'm psychoanalyzed
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Hi same anon here #imshy but I never mind yap!! I watched the Batman (very late though like last week) and I honestly didn't like it lols but hey Paul dano,,, and same I want to start writing soooo bad but I'm nervous and also I'm like not good 😭😭 I can understand the characters but when it comes to writing my mind is sooo blank..,, and klitz mischaracterization is sooo bad I saw ur rant and like exactly!! I think he's bold if anything

im so shy too lol n e ways idk if id like the batman bc my dad (whos a comic guy) didnt like it but my brother did so we are split 💔
tbh i think the writing thing is scary when you share it but as a personal thing omfggg its so silly to be able to make all my daydreams be more cohesive n reread them. sometimes its a throw whatever and it works out but im not a writer im an artist so idk how they do it 😭 its kinda the same w my art bc even tho it doesnt really look like the person idc sometimes bc i know its the character >:3 also in general fics imo are more self fulfilling over anything so i think even if its bad as long as it was fun to write its a win (also practice is a bitch but its the only option to get better 😔💔)
ALSO I COULD SMOOCH YOU OMGGG guysss klitz would be SUCH a flirt, def the type to make moves. END THE SHY KLITZ PROPAGANDA 🗣️🗣️
#my mind is in scrambles ive been busy lolz#like im ok at understanding media. maybe pretty well but ive watched the girl next door at LEAST 4 times#16 year old me had time to THINK#i will never forgive the fandom for watering him down so severely.#lets see if i watch the batman before the sequel comes out 😍😍#i felt like i was writing an essay with an intro body and conclusion 😭
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Have you ever been assumed to be romantically attracted to someone and even just the thought of that makes you want to throw up . Anybody
#had someone's husband in my dms going on about how i want this bitch romantically and frankly if i hadn't been so busy crying i would've#actually thrown up . absolutely disgusting idea . vile even . horrid concept#anyway tldr im down a best friend because he didn't tell me anything i was doing was wrong after telling me that everything was okay and#then sent his husband after me to call me a creep that was obsessed with him that also apparently tried to make out w him#the same trip that my best friend of five years told me he hated having me in his hometown to see him graduate.#this was after i found out my cat had been murdered and mutilated and thrown in my granma's garden . that day happened to be my birthday#because my ma was kind enough to drive me and my lil brother down there to go see him graduate bc he was also supposed to move in w us the#month after . and he told me right after i got home that he 'didn't think it would be good for our relationship' and apparently#just didn't know how to tell me until a month before it was supposed to happen . bonkers times over here#anyway i didn't want to make out with him . he cried after i wouldn't have sex w him just last december . which i specifically got high as#shit to avoid . and i dont even have like. actual examples of what i was doing wrong to go off of so now i just get to live in mystery#forever ig. like shocker that the person that's been my best friend for five years would tell his husband to say that to me and not say that#shit to me himself . this is a wild to me . i feel like im going insane . can anybody even hear me what's going on#you know its bad when your mama gets so sick of you crying over a friend that she hugs you for the first time in years#also i cant sleep my head hurts . crying is evil . devils liquid . might watch rpdr or something . still nauseous over the idea of being#into him romantically btw . like still nauseous over that . like what a fucking insult to our entire friendship#does saying that we may as well have been made of the same atoms mean like . nothing . does nothing ive said to or about him not mean anythi#ng if its not romantic in nature . what did i do that wasnt enough for him. i fucking told him he outgrew me and that was fine i just#wanted to know if we were still friends or not and he said we were and i believed him. if he told me the sky was green i would make it so#ripping my hair out . am i being dramatic . am i the only person that wasn't expecting this . am i the only one that didn't know#when i had to tell people who knew about the moving plans that he changed his mind the first fucking thing i was told was “i thought it migh#t happen.“ WELL I FUCKINH DIDN'T . AND NOBODY TOLD ME#this is like . the second most humiliating moment of my life . aside from movinggate because at least nobody irl has to know about this#anyway . this boy could've taken my blood and i'd sit there and smile while he did it because he was my best friend .#i was so glad we got to grow up together. i miss him already. im taking my little brother to school my myself for the first time and all im#gonna wanna do is tell him about it . im tired . i want to sleep . im still so nauseous . did none of it mean anything just because ive#never and will never like him romantically. does that make everything less worthy somehow#i hope he never talks to me again. i dont think i could handle this again. he let is fucking husband say that shit to me. not him.#puppmeo misery
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me adding f1 to my bio doing some kind of clown walk of shame because my neurodivergent ass got dragged into it because of an AU in a fanfic. lord save me plz
#OGUH#tbf IN MY DEFENCE#ive been grazing shoulders with F1 FOR YEARS#i knew who Senna was WAY before I knew what F1 was#I've been watching rallye clips since forever#AND I watched Top Gear#and my dad's a mechanic#and I can fix a car if I put my mind to it. probably#like I worked with him a lot of stuff#SO IVE BEEN IN THIS SPHERE FOREVER ESPECIALLY WHEN I TURNED 13 AND BEGAN WORKING WITH HIM ON STUFF MORE#soooooooooooo not suprised at all BUT STILL#this feels concerningly similar to a shitass fucking fandom I was in before it's giving 'out of the frying pan and into the toaster'#but im smarter now so I'll just chill on tumblr and explode twitter with my mind and lght block and bitch tryna start shit#bc honestly? I couldnt give less of a shit#I LOVE SPORTS TOO ANOTHER EXAMPLE OF BE BRUSHING SHOULDERS WITH F1#fucking love hockey. and football (soccer)
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he's the only hyperfixation that never really seems to die
Once again marvelling at the absolute infectious power of Sonic the Hedgehog, as a character and a series. So many of us got the bug from just... watching one playthrouh, seeing him in a crossover game, or parody and spoof dubbing. It doesn't matter.
Because once he gets you, he gets you. Here for life. A brain main stay. Commandeers your obsessive tendencies. Many such cases.
#ive been a sonic fan since consciousness#its started when i was 5#my dad had a playstation 2#before that when he was a kid#he had a genesis#he always liked sonic#he said it took him ages#but he eventually beat sonic 2#then when i was 5#he got mega collection plus#that menu theme is burned into my mind and so damn nostalgic#i never actually managed to beat any of the games#but the games were so so cool#sonic 3 is still my favourite#i then learned about sonic lost world#which had released very recently#lost world is pretty childish and tame compared to the rest of what made the series good#but it was perfect for me to get into#i never had any of the games growing up#i just lived watching the cgi cutscenes#unleashed cutscene is the best#even to my 6 year old self#i remember really liking that one ad#i think it was for insurance#i cant remember#id go to this one site to watch it#i dont remeber which either#but it would have sonic 06 playthrough episodes in the reccomendations after it finished#sonic 06 looked so damn cool#i still love it
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