#also saved a dying kid everyone wrote off

[brain-deadx0]

I love the show The Librarians but I never can forgive the writers for making an entire episode about Ezekiel Jones going through trauma after trauma, learning so many things and growing so much as a person as he fights through a time loop looking for some way to save everyone, having him succeed in saving everyone but himself, and for his fellow Librarians who only know the last loop to bring him back BUT HE HAS NO MEMORIES FROM HIS TIME IN THE TIME LOOP!

Just a character reset and I was so pissed. They didn't even allude to him actually remembering but pretending not to!

[dronningreid]

Between letters.

When reader has been acting weird lately, Reid thinks she's going to break up with him but she's actually terrified because she has to give him some life-changing news.

who? Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

category: angst/fluff

warnings: Reid is hopeless, reader is a little mean because she doesn't know how to deal with the stress of her secret. Both must work on their communication. English is not my first language (if i forget something let me know, this is my first time doing this)

word count: 2.6K

a/n: Hello! Thank you to everyone who took the time to read what i wrote with so much love. I have written books, stories, poems but never a fanfic and i must admit that i enjoyed this a lot. Well, without further ado i hope you enjoy this and let me know if you liked it.

It is said that we should wait for good things. But it is so difficult to wait for them when we find ourselves in such a deep abyss, where we believe that the only thing we need is that warm ray of joy to get us out of the pond, to save us from dying in agony.

Spencer needed that warm ray of joy after Maeve's death. He desperately needed to feel alive again, but he had to wait what seemed like an eternity for you to come into his life.

Yet every devastating event like that leaves wounds that bleed into scars, some take perhaps too long and as the blood pours out, it destroys hope.

That's what happened to Reid. Because the day Maeve died, his hopes of having a wife and children, of having a family, died with her…

You came along a couple of years later. You admit that winning Spencer over was something that took time, it was slow but it was worth every second.

You were also thankful that he wasn't like the other jerks you dated before, who thought you would die for them just because you were the one who made the first move.

And that was the difference between you and Spencer. You never let that get you down, you kept trying until you found the one. Who knew it would be someone with three PhDs? Your trusted tarot reader, duh. But you didn't believe it, the guy seemed too perfect to be real.

But there he was, spinning around in his swivel chair when you first walked into the BAU bullpen.

"Who is he?" you asked with a curiosity you hadn't experienced in years.

"Oh, that's Spencer. One of our resident geniuses." The sweet Penelope Garcia cleared up your doubts.

The name tasted so sweet on your lips, it sounded so right. That was the day you decided he would be for you.

Spencer.

Well no, he actually thought you were a little crazy for staring at him so intently from a distance. And he thought you were weird, but he was too so it just made both fit together like puzzle pieces.

Of course you needed some extra help. You were trying to win over someone who hadn't dated in a long time and was also a bit reserved. Luckily for you, Morgan's advice scared him off so you followed JJ's, although it also helped that he was definitely mhm curious? about you.

The relationship seemed to be going great, both loved each other and he couldn't imagine his life without you. But if Spencer Reid had learned something in his life, it was that happiness lasts much less time than pain.

You were acting a little weird around him lately, you were irritable and he definitely knew you were hiding something.

"I think she's going to break up with me." One day he decided to confess his feelings to Morgan, when they were alone in the conference room.

Morgan frowned and dropped the current case file onto the table. “You’re kidding, right?” But with no response, Morgan knew otherwise. "Reid. She loves you so much it makes me a little sick.”

Reid remained with his worried expression. "She's slow to respond to my texts, she avoids me, and there's definitely something she's not telling me.” He counted your recent actions on his fingers before crossing his arms.

Morgan raised an eyebrow. "Don't tell me you're profiling her."

Reid frowned. "What? Of course not." Yeah, that means of course yes.

Morgan shrugged. "Just talk to her or ask the girls, they should know something." This time he gave some good advice, not like the ones he used to give you.

Reid did as Morgan told him, but absolutely no one knew what was going on with you. Although everyone agreed that you were definitely hiding something.

You took a sip of coffee. "I watched that movie last night. People said it was really funny but I found it boring, although I admit the plot twist made me cry.” Yes, lately many things made you cry and it wasn't because of your moon in Pisces.

Anderson nodded. "Exactly! I couldn't even finish watching. I fell asleep."

“Anderson, would you excuse us for a minute?" Reid's appearance was a surprise, his insistence on talking to you wasn't.

"Of course, see you later." Then once Anderson left, Reid stood in front of you.

"What's wrong?" He got straight to the point, not like the previous times.

"Me? Nothing's wrong, I'm perfectly fine." But the drumming of your fingers on your coffee glass gave you away.

"Oh, of course." He crossed his arms, oh no, it seems his infinite patience turned out to be finite.

You immediately took a defensive stance. "Yes. I was perfectly fine before you came to interrupt my conversation with Anderson."

"About movies?" He didn't say it, but you knew he thought it was a nonsense, at least now that he was definitely irritated.

“Yes!" Your outburst earned you a few glances from the other agents. But both were too wrapped up in the tense conversation to deal with them.

"Sure, you have time to talk to other people about movies, but you don't even say a damn good morning to me.” You had to be careful what you said, you were in unfamiliar territory now, as Reid didn't usually swear.

"You're overreacting." Yeah... That probably wasn't the most brilliant thing you've ever said, but you were trying not to give away your secret, at least not yet.

“Overacting?” He was offended by your words. “You talk to everyone in the building except me. You used to spend as much time with me as possible, did I do something wrong?” A hint of fear and insecurity crept into his annoyed tone.

You shook your head. “Of course not.”

He put his hand on your shoulder. “Then tell me what’s wrong.” His tone was firm, but not harsh. Although it was obvious that he wasn't making a request of you.

"Spencer, I already told you that nothing is wrong with me." You emphasized the nothing.

He exhaled in frustration, he was 90% sure that this would work. "Fine! Then don't tell me anything." His patience had run out and he wasn't going to beg you anymore. It had been a week like this and he couldn't take it anymore, so he let go of your shoulder and walked away without even looking at you or giving you a sweet kiss on the cheek.

∗⋅✧⋅∗

Everything was dark, you reached for the light switch and then the spotlight illuminated your apartment. It was a less warm space without Spencer there.

You sighed before throwing your bag on the couch and closed the door.

You stood there for a couple of minutes staring at the lonely space. Well since you became Spencer Reid's girlfriend there weren't many lonely nights, mornings or afternoons.

You would definitely prefer him to be here right now, rambling or mumbling a foreign language movie to you. But for now you had to keep your secret, and that meant keeping Reid away.

The growl of your stomach snapped you out of your mind, so you headed straight for the fridge. But the smell of something made you nauseous, so you immediately ran to the bathroom to empty the contents of your stomach on the toilet.

Yes. You had to hurry to sweeten this horrible memory with a concerned Spencer who would hold your hair and rub your back while you threw up.

After dinner and take a warm shower, you were tired enough to do anything else, so you settled into bed to sleep. But your brain had other plans…

"You look... not very awake." Tara commented as soon as you dropped your coat on the back of your chair.

"I only slept three damn hours," you nearly growled before throwing yourself into the chair and running your hands over your face. You needed a liter of coffee.

Tara stopped typing on her computer and looked at you. "Is this something to do with your strange behavior the last week?" When she got no response, she said your name seriously.

You pulled your hands away from your face. “I…” you began to fiddle with the rings on your fingers, the burden of unspoken words beginning to weigh on your shoulders. "God, why does everyone suddenly care about my fucking life?" You opted for annoyance as the perfect disguise for your vulnerability.

"Hey. None of us want to bother you, but we care about your life because we are your friends and we love you." Tara used a serious tone, like a scolding, but there was genuine affection behind her words. "Besides, Reid is suffering because of your attitude."

A pang of guilt hit your chest. “I don’t want to hurt him.” You whispered.

“I know.” She walked over to your desk. “But you’re hurting him, even if you don’t mean to.”

You swallowed before looking up. "It's just that there's something..." You took a deep breath, this was harder than you thought. "Things are changing, things are definitely going to change if I say this, it's going to be real and I don't know how to feel about it. I need someone to tell me what to do, because I feel so lost."

Tara placed one of her hands over yours. "Well, if I'm going to help you, I need you to tell me what's wrong." Her voice was warm.

"I want Spencer to know first." But your half-hearted answer was enough for her to know.

"In that case you should tell him, because none of his PhDs include mind reading." She made a little joke that actually made you smile.

"Yeah, I know. He'll probably solve everything out like he always does." Then you looked straight at his empty desk, at the nameplate: Spencer Reid. "But I want to give him a surprise, something that will make him happy. I can't just walk up and say hey…” Then you forced yourself to close your mouth when you realized you were going to say more than necessary, although in reality Tara already had her suspicions.

"Okay, I'll help you." She sounded very determined and you really appreciated her help and that she wouldn't question you as much as the others.

∗⋅✧⋅∗

You spun around in your chair and then had an epiphany, but not like the Taylor Swift song. "Crossword!" Your excitement got you the looks of several agents in the bullpen, luckily one of them was Tara.

"With a secret message?"

"Yes. It's literally the best way." You said excitedly.

But in your mind everything was easier than it really was.

You ruffled your hair as you forced yourself to think more, giving you a splitting headache. "When did I think this would be a good idea? Doing a crossword puzzle for the average person is easy, but not for a genius with an IQ of 187." You dropped your head onto your desk.

"You need help."

"But who's as smart as Spencer?" You muttered defeated, still with your head hidden between your arms and the wood of the desk.

Someone ruffled your hair. “Mhm. Tesla? Einstein?”

You immediately raised your head, only to see the famous Derek Morgan. “They’re dead.” You snorted.

Morgan raised his hands in peace. "Hey, what's the bad mood, baby girl? I just answered your question." He let out one of his signature laughs.

You rolled your eyes. You wished you could turn off some damn switch that was responsible for making you so easily angry. God, WHY? You were starting to get desperate.

"Blake!" Another epiphany, you were really on top of it. You didn't even explain it to Tara, you just ran to the parking lot to get your phone which you had forgotten in the car.

Alex Blake was happy to help you put together a crossword puzzle for Spencer. Although she warned you that he once solved one in about five minutes.

Yeah, well, you were going to take the risk.

Once the crossword puzzle with the secret message was ready, you set out to find Reid.

As you were leaving Garcia's office he was getting out of the elevator, but he didn't even notice you. He continued on his way and god, why did he look so attractive?

"Spencer." You caught up to him as he walked up the stairs.

"Not now, I'm busy." He replied with a seriousness not typical of him.

"With what?" You frowned.

"I said I'm busy." I didn't even look at you as he continued walking to the conference room.

You called out to him, but he ignored you. “We need to talk.” You said seriously, raising your voice.

He turned to look at you, with an expression that betrayed nothing of what he truly felt. "I said I'm busy, we'll talk later." That didn't convince you. “I have to do a geographic profile and you have to work on victimology like Hotch asked you to.”

He stopped in his tracks immediately, freezing halfway. He had never experienced anything like this before, but he knew well what we need to talk meant.

The end was near? You were beginning to doubt and he was very sure, only that he would delay it as much as he could.

∗⋅✧⋅∗

You were about to give up, but you really needed him to know. So you resorted to plan B.

"Derek Morgan, my favorite person in the world." You appeared in front of him, with a big smile.

Morgan let out a light laugh. "Yeah sure, what can I do for you, gorgeous?"

"I think Spencer is upset with me."

"He definitely is." He said it without hesitation and it definitely didn't help the state of your aching heart.

"Okay..." You handed him the crossword puzzle. "Could you please give him this for me?"

He picked up the crossword puzzle. "If you think he's going to forgive you for avoiding him for a week just by giving him a crossword puzzle that he'll finish in two seconds, you might be right."

"Just give it to her, okay?"

"Of course. But in exchange for Penelope being the godmother.”

You immediately frowned, but you reacted a little late because Morgan had already left to deliver your order.

From your desk you watched everything. From how Morgan entered the conference room to give Spencer the crossword puzzle to how the bastard answered it in five minutes. When it took you like three hours to do.

But the best part was when he realized the secret message and ran out of the conference room.

But when he saw you, his quickened steps took on a much, much slower pace.

"Tell me what's true." His low tone sounded like a plea.

A slight smile appeared on your face. "Yeah. That's why I've been acting weird, you know I can't keep secre-"

Your words were cut off when his lips met yours. In a kiss so sweet and soft that it was enough to dispel every single one of your doubts.

A few seconds later, he pulled away from the kiss, leaving you wanting more.

He caressed your cheek with his thumb. "You didn't have to do a crossword puzzle to tell me you were pregnant."

"I wanted to surprise you." You whispered.

A smile that could light up this whole town formed on his lips. "I love you so much." He then kissed you warmly again.

And so it was that the foundations that had crumbled with Maeve's death slowly re-emerged. They began to build themselves again with your arrival and now with this news, their foundations were stronger than ever, because at last he was going to have the family he had dreamed of for a tortuous time.

🏷️ @floraisunwell

[slytherin-pen]

Season of Shadows

A/N: My first fanfic and specifically my first time writing on Tumblr. I hope you enjoy it. Feel free to comment suggestions or recommendations! I wrote this with an OC, but I love x reader fics too so I might give it a try in the future.

Ivy joined the Inner Circle six months ago, just before they went to war with Hybern. Now, a few weeks later, after wounds are healed, the Night Court is ready to celebrate their victory. All but one, one who thought everyone was blind to her fake smiles. She clearly underestimated the ever-observant Spymaster.

warnings: mentions of past death

pairing: azriel x oc

word count: 2.4k

all acotar related credits go to SJM

banner credit to @cafekitsune

The music at Rita’s reverberated in Ivy's ears as she observed her friends on the dance floor. Feyra, Rhys, Cassian, and Nesta moved sensually with their partners, while Mor attracted numerous admirers of both genders.

Ivy remained at their table alone nursing her third glass of wine. She wasn’t much of a drinker but taking a sip seemed to be her nervous tic at this point. Amren was spending the night with Varian, and Elain had stayed home as usual. Azriel had walked off to the bar shortly after the group's arrival. The Inner Circle had endured a lot. After the war with Hybern, several members suffered from significant injuries. Although wings and bones could be mended, the invisible scars often proved more challenging. This was Ivy’s current predicament. No amount of wine could erase the memory of witnessing her childhood best friend perish on the battlefield.

Hybern had infiltrated their village in the Spring Court, demanding the villagers either join them or die. Ivy had already left the village, following her now High Lady during her final escape from Spring. Ivy’s father, a guard for Tamlin, had been left to die for a High Lord who cared little for his people. When Ivy spotted Lucien and Feyra fleeing through the woods, she pleaded to join them, offering her powers in aid. She realized that to help her people, she needed to escape the Spring Court and align with those taking action.

Ivy’s ability to manipulate plants proved invaluable when, minutes after finding Lucien and Feyra, two Hybern soldiers emerged from the trees. Although she was not a fighter, she used the vines on nearby trees to restrain the soldiers, allowing Feyra to finish them off.

Now, as she sat in Rita’s, she reflected on every letter exchanged with Wells during Hybern’s reign over Spring, questioning when exactly she had failed him and her village. Upon joining the Inner Circle, Ivy had hoped to return and help her people, but she had not arrived in time. Wells had joined Hybern, believing it was the only way to save his family, but Hybern did not honor their agreement. Wells became a traitor in many eyes, dying in vain, and now his family and he were both gone.

Ivy could not share her grief openly. Not only was she the only one who knew Wells, but he was also deemed a traitor. Sympathy was scarce for those who had sided with the enemy. Her attempts to speak on his behalf were swiftly dismissed. Most believed that he should have died with honor alongside his family. It wasn’t that simple; he was just a kid, not a soldier. Her efforts felt futile, leaving her to mourn alone, bearing a heavy heart.

She slid out of the booth after finishing her wine. The two couples and Mor continued dancing as she made her way to the back door. She needed a moment to breathe. Being surrounded by joy while she crumbled inside was overwhelming. Stepping into the night, she took a sharp inhale, the chilled air biting her nose and cheeks, flushing her pale skin. A few paces from the bar, she sat on a bench facing a pathway through the town.

Ivy often distracted herself by imagining the lives of strangers based on their appearance. One couple that passed had clearly argued; the female stomped ahead while the male trailed behind, head down like a chastised child. Another woman seemed to have just finished work at a bakery, given her tired demeanor and the white powder on her shirt.

Just as Ivy began to analyze a passing man, she sensed a presence beside her. Azriel sat down, his shadows lingering near his shoulders, with a few tendrils curling around her feet. He remained silent, staring straight ahead. Ivy accepted his company and resumed her people-watching.

A few minutes passed before Azriel spoke. “He’s a farmer.”

Ivy turned towards him. “What?”

Azriel nodded towards an older man with mud-stained knees and a tan stopping at his short sleeves. “That man, I bet he’s a farmer.”

“Oh,” Ivy murmured. “How did you-”

“I’m the Spymaster,” Azriel replied, a slight smirk tugging at his lips. “This isn’t the first time I’ve caught you.”

“Right,” Ivy said, wringing her hands together. Unlike Azriel's leathers, she wore a dress that ended at her knees and a thick wool cardigan. She still wasn’t accustomed to the Night Court’s weather. While it experienced all four seasons, unlike the Seasonal Courts, she thought she’d always miss eternal spring.

“Why are you out here instead of inside with the others?” he asked. His wings were tucked in, and Ivy swore she could see the moonlight streaming through the membrane. This, she thought, is a creature meant for the night.

“I just—” she took a deep breath, “needed a minute. It’s hard to hear your thoughts in there sometimes.”

“I understand,” he said. His hazel eyes searched her face. “Do you want to talk about it? I promise I’m the least likely in the Circle to interrupt you.”

Ivy chuckled at the jab at his more boisterous family members. “I’m sure you don’t want to hear it. No one else does.”

A shadow gently pushed strands of her blonde hair behind her pointed ear, giving Azriel a clearer view of her face. “Try me.”

She looked at him through her lashes and sighed. “My friend Wells. I miss him, or who he used to be, I suppose.”

His eyes narrowed slightly as if sifting through his memories. “The friend who joined Hybern?”

“Yes,” she said, a tear sliding down her face. “That friend. And honestly, Azriel, if you’re just going to tell me to forget about him or curse his grave, I really—”

Azriel took her hands, forcing her nails to release the skin they had been piercing in her tight grip. She could still feel the warmth through his leather gloves. “That’s not what I was going to say. Your friend faced a terrible choice. A choice that none of us have faced nor can we predict how we would’ve reacted. He was your friend, and you’re allowed to mourn him as such,” he said softly.

More tears clouded her blue eyes. “It doesn’t feel like it,” she rasped. “I visited our village a few days ago to see how the repairs were coming along.” Her gaze dropped to her hands still held in his, and he gave a comforting squeeze. “They wrote ‘traitors’ on the door in red paint, meant to look like blood, I’m sure. And the looks I got just for being there... I didn’t even dare try to clean any of it up.”

Azriel’s brows furrowed. “You went to Spring? With who?”

Ivy did not look up from their hands and bit her bottom lip instead.

One of Azriel's shadows crept under her chin, tilting her face towards him. His pupils flicked between her eyes before he asked incredulously, “You went alone, didn’t you?”

Ivy nodded, removing one of her hands from his grasp to wipe her tears with her knuckles. “I had no choice. Do you think if I asked, someone would’ve taken me? Your whole family hates the Spring Court.” Azriel clenched his jaw, swallowing the urge to correct her. They are her family too now, but her not viewing them as such was just a small piece of the puzzle he planned to solve.

“I would have.” He grabbed her hand again and scooted closer until their thighs touched, the leather of his pants grazing her bare skin. “I would have gone with you. Crossing borders alone is dangerous, no matter who you are. Besides, I would have supported you. You didn’t need to do that alone, emotionally either.”

“I’ll remember that next time,” she sniffled.

“Would you like to go home? To the House of Wind, I mean. Everyone else will stay at the River House tonight. Depending on how you want to spend the rest of your night, we could raid Rhys’ wine cellar or ask the House for tea.”

Ivy smiled slightly at the offer. “I’d like to go home. And have tea. I’m putting on a brave face right now, but I rarely drink, and I am feeling it.”

Azriel chuckled as he stood, gently pulling her up with him. “Would you like to fly or winnow?”

Ivy looked up at the sky and then back to Azriel. “I’ve never flown with you before.”

“There’s a first time for everything,” he smirked. He guided her arm around his neck before lifting her, one hand looping under her thighs and the other around her torso. “Hold on tight.”

An hour later, Ivy and Azriel finished their second cup of chamomile tea, courtesy of the House. Azriel had changed into a black tunic and sleep pants, while Ivy had replaced her dress with a nightgown under her cardigan.

The fire in the hearth provided some warmth, but Ivy's fingers and toes remained slightly numb from the cold. Lucky Illyrian, she thought. They were built for this climate. Ivy felt like a snake trying to survive in an igloo. She had settled in front of the hearth with a blanket in her lap, while Azriel sat in the armchair to her left. Some of his shadows slithered across the floor, into her lap, and curled around her hands. As she lifted her hands to observe them, she realized they had formed into glove-like shapes over her fingers.

“Are you still cold?” Azriel asked. Ivy had half a mind to tell him he already knew the answer. He didn’t need to be the Spymaster or use his shadows to notice the shivers she was trying to conceal.

Ivy smiled sheepishly. “A little, but it’s alright. I’ve lived here for six months, and hypothermia hasn’t claimed me yet.”

Azriel smiled as he stood before sitting on the floor next to her. “Well, I’d like to keep it that way.” He stretched his legs out alongside hers, pulling some of the blanket over himself before curling his wings around them. “Better?”

The view of the rest of the room was blocked by his wings, trapping the heat from the fire and directing it back toward him and Ivy. She could barely suppress the shudder of pleasure at the newfound warmth. She hadn’t realized how much of it had been wasted filling the rest of the room. “Yes, thank you,” she replied with a small smile.

Azriel put an arm over her shoulder and pulled her closer. “It’s alright to miss your home, you know? Our family might not like Spring, and its High Lord even less, but we understand.”

Ivy sighed and played with a loose thread on the blanket. “I’d just rather not bring it up. Of course, I sympathize with what Feyre went through, not just the day I found her but before too. I just can’t stand to hear how they talk about it. The Spring I grew up in was nothing like she described, and now it’s all destroyed. It’s not like I could take everyone there now and show them how beautiful it was.”

Azriel was silent for a moment, pondering her words. She was right. The Inner Circle would never understand the beauty she claimed for the Spring Court, and with Tamlin as High Lord, they might never see it until someone else took over, which could take a millennium. “Cassian and I get into fights over Illyria sometimes.”

Ivy frowned as she faced the Shadowsinger. “About what?”

He shifted slightly and stared into the fire. “It’s no secret that Cass and I had our…misfortunes in the camps we called home. The difference now is Cassian still sees Illyria as his home. He still has hope it could be a better place someday.”

“And you don’t?”

Shaking his head, “No, I don’t.” Ivy reached over and grabbed his scarred hand, giving it a squeeze as he had for her. “Here is my home now. Rhys and Cass know that if I weren’t the Spymaster with duties requiring me to visit the camps, I’d never set foot in Illyria again. Aside from all the bad memories, the males don’t respect us, and they never will. It’s very difficult to change a place that sees you as dirt under their boots.”

Ivy fiddled with his scarred fingers in her lap. “So you and Cassian fought about what to do with the camps?”

“Not exactly,” he said, his shoulders slumping. “My point is that having disagreements about our homes is nothing new for us. Cassian and I see Illyria differently. Even Mor battles with herself about the Court of Nightmares. She hates her father and Hewn City, but it was still her home. No amount of hatred, even on her end, will change that. The same way none of our opinions about your home will change the fact that you grew up there. It will always have a piece of you.”

Her lips quivered before she turned her head away. “I wish I— I couldn’t help them in time. I left them alone thinking I was going to be some hero, we both did, and we both failed.” The tears rolling down her face reflected the flames in the hearth. “How am I any better than him? We both thought we were doing the right thing.” Instead of a shadow again, it was Azriel’s thumb that wiped her cheeks gently.

“And you weren’t wrong,” he whispered. “Just because things didn’t go as planned doesn’t mean it wasn’t worth trying. I have failed hundreds of missions in my lifetime. I don’t regret all of them. Some just didn’t go my way.”

“I regret this one,” she sobbed. “He’s dead. It’s all my fault!”

Azriel quickly brought her into his lap and tightened his wings around them. He cupped her face with his free hand as he spoke. “Ivy. Ivy, look at me.”

She continued to sob and gasp but looked at him nonetheless.

“It’s not your fault.” He rested his forehead on hers. “It’s not your fault. And I will take you to the Spring Court if that’s what you need. To help with repairs, say goodbye, pack— anything.”

“Thank you,” she rasped. “I appreciate that.” She attempted a small smile, but it looked more like a grimace.

Azriel smiled softly and kissed her head. “Why don’t we get you to bed? You’ll have a busy day tomorrow. You’re planning our itinerary.”

Ivy managed a laugh and nodded. Azriel easily stood with her in his arms and walked toward the stairs. “Thank you, Az. It means a lot.”

“Anytime,” he whispered as her head rested against his chest and her eyes closed.

[abla-soso]

I loath how they wrote Alicent in her finale confrontation with Rhaenyra (the writers constant need to "humble" Alicent is deeply misogynistic), but at least I'm glad she didn't "give up" her sons like so many people claimed she did.

She said she could convince Aegon to bend the knee and surrender the city (he's too broken to fight back and still wants his mother's approval), and then Aemond - while away in Harrenhal - would be forced to surrender, too.

That's not her discarding her sons to save her daughter. That's her grasping at straws to save ALL her children. She's convinced Rhaenyra will win the war with her new dragons and that this is her final chance to save her sons.

Helaena can be spared imprisonment because she was never involved in the war, but Aegon and Aemond can't. That's why she only offered for Helaena to leave KG. If she knew about the secret plans to smuggle Aegon out of KG, I have no doubt she'd support it.

Was it silly and naive of her to think her sons can be convinced or foreced to surrender? That Rhaenyra will not execute them? Yes. Aegon would rather die than surrender to the people who murdered his kid. Aemond would rather die than admit defeat.

But Alicent was losing her mind with desperation and almost killed herself because of it, and the thought of Helaena getting dragged into joining the war and dying or ending up like Aegon was too triggering, so it makes sense she'd reach this point of desperation and delude herself into thinking she can sway her sons' decisions.

Do I like it? Absolutely not. I dislike this spineless and flavourless Alicent. But I've long accepted that this version of Alicent is nothing like book Alicent, so meh. Whatever. It's shitty writing, but it makes sense for the shitty show version of Alicent. I just wish the writers would stop being misogynistic jerks and allow Alicent to have some dignity. At least they didn't have her beg Rhaenyra out of love for her, ugh. At least she only humiliated herself for her children.

Rhaenyra's hypocrisy and smug satisfaction pissed me the fuck off. How can anyone beilives she has any love or respect for Alicent is beyond me. She just told her to her face that her sons must die and she will not accept any surrender that might save their lives.

But I'm also glad. This will finally kill any love or goodwill Alicent might have towards Rhaenyra. So we might finally begin to see hints of book Alicent in season 3.

Rhaenyra was explicitly shown as a ruthless, narssastic cult leader who cares about herself above everyone, including her own son, in the previous episode. The writers can not back out from this. She will live to regret how she rejected Alicent's offer to surrender.

[princess-of-the-corner]

The Lost Fic 😔

Okay, This is me just spewing what I remember of that fic I mentioned earlier, cause it was real good, and I want to share. If anyone finds the guy who wrote it, or a reupload or something, send the link/name, this thing was real good!

So, like, I forget the exact starting point, but in this fic, Emilie and Gabriel swap roles, so Gabe’s the one dying from the Peacock, and Emilie is the one left behind. So, Gabe uses the Peacock to impregnate Emilie, so they can have Adrien. I think there was a plot point of how Colt used it first to impregnate Amelie, and that’s how it got broken? Like Amelie and Emilie are thinking about using the Peacock so they can have kids, and Colt and Amelie use it first to see if it works, because Emilie had, like, a “weaker constitution”. It works, and they have Felix, but Colt ends up breaking the Peacock to do it, don’t remember how exactly (no one is actually aware of this until later). There’s also speculation in universe if the Peacock breaking while forming Felix is the reason he’s “like that”, but 1) the speculation comes FROM COLT, and 2) everyone else is of the opinion that, ya know, being ABUSED might have something to do with it.

So, Gabe uses the broken Peacock to impregnate Emilie, they have Adrien, and it’s all fine and dandy until Gabe starts to get sick. Like, REALLY sick, faster than Emilie does in canon. Emilie and Gabe are scrambling to figure out why, to find a cure (in this continuity, this is where Nathalie shows up, Emilie hires her to help them find a cure) but no luck. As Gabe gets worse and worse, he pleads with Emilie to try and save him, to do whatever she can. And Emilie at first is all for it! She uses the Butterfly to seek out anything and everything that could help them! But … there’s a middle bit here I think I’m forgetting, but  as time goes by with no sign of a cure, Emilie starts to notice a change in Gabe. Like, a bit of sanity slippage going on. Which eventually culminates in Gabe trying to steal Adrien’s amok, thinking he can use it to cure himself, at the cost of Adrien. Emilie is horrified, and manages to save Adrien’s amok, but in the altercation, Gabe swipes the Butterfly, and uses it with the Peacock to do … something, it isn’t clear at the time, because doing whatever this is causes Gabe’s life to give out, and Gabe dies. Just drops dead, and both Miraculous vanish.

Again, I’m missing some big chunks, but the long and the short of it is that, with the Miraculous gone and a better support system, Emilie goes to therapy to try and work out some of this. There’s a whole chapter dedicated to her working out her toxic upbringing, and how her parents insistence on “lineage” and “bloodline” led to using the Peacock in the first place, as opposed to adopting or something. Emilie has to learn exactly how toxic her upbringing was, and come to the realization that, as much as she loved him, she and Gabriel were feeding into each other’s issues, and they should both have seen a mental health professional at some point. She also has a lot of guilt about Gabe’s death, feeling like it’s all her fault, which she has to work through. For the main plot, it culminates in Emilie realizing she’s taken being protective over Adrien too far, and enrolling him at DuPont when “Origins” kicks off. Also, there’s a bit of drama in her beginning to date Nathalie, partially because she feels guilty for moving on, partly because she didn’t realize she was bisexual until her therapist spelled it out for her.

The plot is mostly the same, except now Hawk Moth wants the Ladybug and Black Cat to “restore what should be”, and Emilie feeling even MORE guilt because she was last person to have the Butterfly, she should have done more, etc, etc. Also, Emilie actually seeks out Fu to apologize and figure out if she can help. Then, around the Season 3 mark, we find out that Hawk Moth is Gabriel … ’s Sentimonster that he made in his image before his death. The Senti!Gabe’s goal, initially, was to steal the Ladybug and Black Cat so he could wish Gabriel back to life, but as time has gone on, his goal has changed, and now he wants to wish himself real. Also, because of the state Gabe was in when he made Senti!Gabe, Hawk Moth has a burning hatred of Adrien, seeing him as “stealing” Emilie from him.

Again, most of this is half remembered, I’m probably not doing it Justice.

Some other bits:

Adrien is about nine when Gabe dies

the reason we don’t have Hawk Moth earlier is that he was apparently “incubating”

Nathalie absolutely fell for Emilie first, and stuck around because she genuinely wanted to help her friend through a tough time

Nathalie and Emilie don’t start OFFICIALLY dating until sometime after Adrien starts school, but everyone agrees they were “more or less” dating already

Emilie’s coming out was her coming home after therapy, accepting a cup of tea from the Gorilla, and asking him “Did you know you can like both men AND women!?”

The Gorilla’s name is Henri, he’s actually Emilie and Amelie’s cousin and Adrien’s godfather

Because Nathalie came in earlier, Adrien has grown up with her. He calls her Auntie Nat, and was convinced from the ages of 5-8 that she was actually the Black Widow (Marvel)

The Agreste Fashion Company mostly belongs to Adrien at this point. Gabe left him most of the stock. It’s all being held in trust until he’s of age, and Adrien plans to either sell it or (much later) hand it over to Marinette

Amelie divorced Colt when she came home early to find him hitting Felix. She had to wrestle Felix’s amok off him - Felix claims it’s the most badass his mother has ever been. Colt is currently in prison at the start of the series, but I think it was hinted he’d become involved later?

Only Felix and Adrien are Sentimonsters.

Kagami’s dad is actually mentioned. He is currently serving time in prison for murder, which he committed in defence of his sister. Tomoe and Kagami visit him regularly, and he’s due out for parole sometime soon.

Chloé has a redemption arc, fairly well written, and becomes a permanent team member along with Alya and Nino. About halfway through, she goes to live with Adrien, (I think after Style Queen?) because her mom yelled at her on national television, and her dad’s response was “you shouldn’t have fucked up, then”. 

Felix and Amelie live in France with Emilie and Adrien, they moved after Colt got arrested. Felix goes to a different school than Adrien, something specific, because Felix was some kind of acting savant. I think it was mentioned he’d been in some stage plays?

Fu was married to his lady love, she used the Tiger to help him out

Marinette and Adrien are endgame

Chloé ends up dating Kagami

Sabrina and Felix end up dating. Chloé gives Felix a shovel speech that makes him terrified of her

Luka is mentioned to have a non-binary date-mate (I think an OC?) that we only meet briefly

After the Bourgeois Screaming Match, Jagged Stone and several other celebs refuse to stay at the Grand Paris

Alya’s mom is Akumatized into “Sue Chef” (it was both a pig pun, and related to legal terms), gets fired from the Grand Paris, and opens her own restaurant 

Lila turns out to be a Sentimonster created by Senti!Gabe, to drum up chaos and fuck with people. They have a father-daughter relationship, and were actually really sweet

The Order comes in as a secondary antagonist at some point after Hawk Moth is defeated, but I can’t exactly remember what their goal was

Hawk Moth’s defeat was basically proving that Hawk Moth didn’t need to use the wish to become real because he was already, and that all our Senti!Characters had been around long enough to become real. Senti!Gabe gets his own name (Can’t remember it) and identity, and officially adopts Lila as his daughter.

Lila has a crush on Alix

At some point, Senti!Gabe jokingly runs for mayor - he wins, because at this point everyone is sick of Andre. Senti!Gabe tries to argue privately that he’s technically only three or four years old, so he’s pretty sure he’s not old enough

That,s all I remember, If anyone finds this fic, send it my way!

-

Okay that’s all fucking GREAT and I hope someone finds this I’d love to read it!

[zeethecatlady]

pjo tv show spoilers!!!

ahhhhh i just finished ep 8 and i have so many thoughts so be ready.

of course across the tv show there are things i love and things i dont necessary agree with but thats lofe and personal opinion so no hate from me here. cause if i too were rick and staftung reading through and adapting something i wrote about what 20 years ago i would change up plot holes and things that i thought would work better too.

i think all the actors were very talented and perfect for there roles.

i love the change of sally teaching percy mythology from a young age thats something i always thought that should of happened to begin with.

i didnt like the characterisation of gabe when watching the show if i hadnt read the books he was almost likeable i thought he was mildly funny i feel like they didnt make him cruel enough to justify the whole medusa thing.

loved the interactions between percy and grover before camp the lighting of percy in school without grover (blue toned) and percy in school with grover (warm toned) really showed how good of a friend he was. grover was so sweet and funny and had great lines cant wait to see him in a wedding dress.

loved percys interaction with mr d i thought it was totally in character and really was quite funny, mr d is just dying for that bottle of wine.

i didnt love the fact that everyone kinda avoided the topic that the gods igbored there children and arw pretty shitty for the majority of the tv show percy kept asking questions like the gods were like the average parent of anyone and no one thought to tell him 'hey percy the gods dont actually talk to their kids so thats why everyone gives you looks when you talk about there parents'.

thalia being pronounced the way it is threw me off but i knlw thats the actuall greek way of saying it so it dosent bother me (i will continue to pronounce it the way i do though)

i thought it was interesting that they had annabeth see the fates and not percy i don't have many comments on this just that it was interesting.

i loved the way they handled medusa and her story but still managed to make her a monster for percy to fight l, its a delicate line that i think they managed perfectly.

the arch i loved the way percy swapped places with annabeth great cinematic moment, i thought it was weird that they didnt have percy jump in trust of his dad xonsidering the way they have changed percys attitude towards gods as parents at the time during the show, but i thought the hand of posiedon saving him was great aswell.

also the arch being a temple of athena was a cool edition i thought they played athenas pettyness pretty good. i did like that annabeth wanted to go becuse architecture but i dont mind the change.

tunnel of love chefs kiss not more to be said really, other than hephaestus he gets it i always liked him as a god.

the way they had grover talk to ares and manipulate him into taking while also reading his emotions so cool i loved the edition so much and it really gave us an in look into both grover and ares as people.

the animal truck was nice i loved the percy and grover interactions about the animals thought it was funny. missed percy not talking to a zebra.

lotus hotel very cool loved the music choice, loved the design, cool that they know its the lotus eaters before they go in. loved the chat with hermes and grover meeting a satyr and playing his hunt the human game. the lost memorys gives a proper view into ehy people would stay there and not leave. also love the little 'bianca' and the two kids who ran past in purple shirts (romans??).

stealing hermes taxi to go to santa monica awesome, i questioned the choice of 4 pearls tp begin with cause i thought 'this will make the prophecy obsolete' but having watched it all now so good loved the choice cause of course posidon would never abandon his queen amongst mortals

the choic of them running out of time on there quest i dont understand was it necessary i dont think them having a day left still would have changed anything that still happened after show wise maybe a few conversations tweeked. (if anyone knows why let me know im curious)

crustys this was the only monster wich i didnt like the way they delt with, i think they had to do it this was as alot of this was percys thoughts in the book which they havent really been transfering to screen that well. i feel like we lost some of percts brutal fatal flaw here with him not killing him and his smarts of him convincing him to get in the bed and trap himself, thats percys thing see if annabeth has plan, persuasion, then fight.

also the underworld not being in DOA :( that was a cool idea so fun and its a pun but maybe for time issues they just resorted to crusty doesnt bother me that much but ill miss it.

percy not bartering with charon again taking away percys skill at persuasion. but not a big deal in long run (missed the drown in bath joke though)

the feilds of asphodel i thought jt was an interesting take, its described in the books as a really busy airports or station of some kind just loads of people standing everywhere. i tought ut was interesting that the souls became trees (does that mean hazel isnt a tree but just wanders amougst the trees?) the fact rhat they made it regrets aste what stick you in asphodel and turn you into a tree i didnt agree with asphodel is the place you go when your life is juat average not bad or evil and not heroic or extremely good, cause u telling me that any hero that goes to elysium dosent have regrets? also annabeth being the one with regrets weird take it should have been grover who regrets alot (thalia for example) but i get they did that cause like the books they were setting it up to look like annabeth was the traitor.

loved the inclusion story about luke hermes and may.

i loved the characterisation of hades i though he was quite accurate to how hades acts in the actual mythology and you can totally see where nico gets it from. just loved the whole interaction.

loved rhw choice of the pearls going back to manutak rather than santa monica.

the fight with ares loved kt was squeeling the entire time, ares beeing cocky and toying with percy, percy showing beast controll of the sea and finally the cut on ares ankle. but what aboutbthe curse! the curse ares puts on percys sword that bexomes relevent not onece but twice. that surely will mess up the fufillment if the prophecy for a possibel 3rd season as thats the whole reason he dosent fight atlas and takes the sky from artemis. so ill have to wait and see how they do that.

annabeth giving percy her beads 😊

calling children of the big three forbidden children its a nice edition that i like (kinda remids me of the fanfic son of seafoam)

the interaction with zeus pretty good liked it the way that zeus appears to be taking kronos somewhat seriously though, well we will se if that lasts.

posiedon stepping in and saving percy and then surrendering-- - my heart cant

pecry going back to camp and being celebrated great as he should. also live the percy luke flashbacks.

now my favourite way the show has changed the percy luke betrayal! i love the way thia changed i always thought that luke should have tried to recruit percy as he does in later books but percy dosent entertain as luke tried to kill him twice but i love that luke was all like percy we could run away and fight the gods. and thevlook on his face when annabeth throws a knife at him and the way percy sliced luke and immediately apologised because although hes angry he dosent acctually want to hurt him. and you can tell why people like luke and join him. obvs the way they have made the gods more likeable from the start means if you havent resd tbe books you probably dont understand lukes motivations as much but jes known the gods are shitty parents for much longer than percy as hed older and percy will get there one day but we all know how that ends up TLO.

percy annabeth and grover all making a promise to meet back at thalia next year so cute

percys dream about kronos really good gives information that made me jump with excitment as a book fan. sally coming to percy with a notebook to note down his dreams is telling in thats not the first time since camp that its happend. also is it his birthday i got the vibe its his birthday. percy telling his mum that kronos told him to tell her shes a good mum made me snort but its sweet that percy is trying to protect her.

over all i have many thoughts and opinions this isnt all of them and if anyone wants specific thoughts on certain things let me know.

i cant wait till s2 they just have to have a season 2!!!!!

sorry for the long post

[margridarnauds]

👻, 🥳, and 💌 please!

Thank you!

👻 What is your wildest headcanon?

Me deciding that Chateau de Peyrol is ridiculously haunted has to be somewhere up on the list -- no canon evidence to support it, but I like to think of Lazare being totally oblivious to his house being a setting from a gothic novel while Ronan is constantly going "Lazare. Lazare. The portrait is staring at me, Lazare."

Lazare secretly loving gossip is based purely on that one moment in the French production when Louis and Marie's marriage is breaking down in front of everyone and Lazare IMMEDIATELY comes in to tell Louis that, by the way, there's a full-on revolt. It's not AS out of pocket, but it is definitely leaning on the cracky side of things, but it also is always funny to have a Lazare who is very critical of the hypocrisy of Versailles, the shallow obsession with gossip, the backstabbing, the intrigues...while he is actively dying on his country estate because he can't get all the hot gossip.

For my Irish mythological things, I decided at some point that the Fomoiri, aka the notoriously terrifying group of people that have been, at various points, described (not by me) as demonic sea monsters who represent pure chaos and destruction, as well as representing various Scandinavian invaders, go out for karaoke once a month as a team building exercise. Themed nights have included ABBA, Britney Spears, Disney, and Taylor Swift. Manannán mac Lir, who is on the other side, gets privileges to come along because he's best friends with Tethra (for Disney night, they did a duet version of "Under the Sea"). They also do a Eurovision watch party once a year, where they root for their various countries of origin (Bres, since he's half Irish and half Norwegian, will root for whoever seems to be winning, going for the UK when he's depressed with both. He might or might not have been culpable for Dustin the Turkey's appearance, which is objectively the most heinous thing he's done.)

🥳 Why did you start writing fanfic?

The very first things I wrote were what I would later recognize were self insert fanfics, where me and my various OCs based on my toys would go into various films and books I was reading to save the day. The Mummy, Barbie: The Princess and the Pauper, Pirates of the Caribbean, and Lord of the Rings were the favorites back in the day (which...really highlights the kind of kid I was), when I was about 5-8. Fanfic, in some form or another, is a natural part of who I am. If I didn't write it, I'd suffocate.

💌 Is there a favorite trope you like to write?

I have been roundly mocked for my tendency to use Significant Chess Games in my fanfic -- you can make a bingo card off of it. In my defense, if it ain't broke, don't fix it.

On a broader scale...it's interesting because when I was younger, I was more inclined to say that I was writing redemption arcs or enemies to lovers arcs, and I think, to some extent, that holds true, but to other extents, there's a lot more in terms of shades of gray -- I work with characters who are at odds with one another for one reason or another and then get them to a point of, frankly, dangerous codependency, and let the dice fall where they may as far as whether it's truly a case of "redemption" or "corruption" or just "becoming increasingly tired over time." Is Ronan a traitor to the revolution for marrying Lazare? Is Margrid betraying some part of who she is by falling in love with Orléans? Would Emma be betraying something if she joined the Tango Korrupti? Is Kitrye betraying her sense of morality by falling in love with Raphael and, honestly, vice versa? I don't know -- I can see why they're irredeemable to some people, no one *has* to forgive the villainous characters for doing villainous things, or the heroic characters for falling for the villainous characters, and I'm not particularly interested in that side of things, but I can also understand exactly why they refuse to give up or compromise, too. That's a very broad arc, but it's definitely a question that I'm always returning to. "The horror was for love" and all that.

[qwixotic]

Accidentally wrote up a huge review of Battle Royale II (my first rewatch)

Just as harrowing as I remember. Almost like Saving Private Ryan (similar kind of atmosphere is depicted). I remember putting off watching BRII for so long because of the whole "Nanahara becomes a terrorist" thing😭 However I still like it nonetheless. I don't have to like everything Nanahara does as a character. Really interesting how, despite what some may consider a silly concept, it is still relevant and representative of society today: People who want similar things in life are still pitted against one another and made to fight fights on behalf of the "bigwigs." The teacher in the movie himself says that there is only good and evil, black and white, no grey zone. It becomes so easy to villainize the other side.

You don't get as attached to the characters as you do in BR I (a big part of that is because they were all lumped together as "rebel, no-good kids"), though members of the Wild 7 are kind of interesting and I would like to know more about each of them. Regardless, I still really like this movie.

Ok EDIT: I wrote the above when I was less than halfway done with the movie. I honestly thought it was about to end.... Little did I know I was merely approaching the one-hour mark and it seemed like a good place to stop. Now at 01:46:15 and this second half (from an entertainment standpoint) seems pretty unnecessary. I guess it does show the atrocities of war, but there is not much variety. Nanahara has become even more unlikable, and I'm not sure if that was the intention or not. If it was the intention, then I can completely respect that choice. I appreciate that he is a complex character. I really don't like how he gave his AK-47 to a kid and told him to protect the others. The kid had been armed with a machine gun for the entire duration of the movie, and that really irked me. Of course Nanahara is a kid himself so maybe he doesn't understand the trauma he is inflicting onto him. But that kid is going to grow up so messed up and his idea of justice will be so skewed, I think. Also it would have been effective if we knew more specifically what the Wild 7 were fighting for, but it's fine, I get the basic idea. But without knowing specifically, it's really hard to defend their actions. Like Mimura(?) (I'm assuming this was Shinji's uncle?) said, killing a few of these guys [soldiers] won't change anything. So even after hearing that, I wonder why Nanahara continued. Maybe it was because keeping at it seemed better than giving up. Maybe there was a sunk-cost fallacy involved.

Also they need to take a page out of Cedric Diggory's book and realize not every important character needs last words said on their deathbed! Cedric's death was the most harrowing for me in the entirety of the Harry Potter movie series because of how sudden his death was. He was there one minute and completely gone the next. No dramatic last words were exchanged. (And then don't get me started on when they finally returned and everyone is cheering except for Harry because no one has realized yet that Cedric's body was lifeless...!! Horrifying.)

EDITx2: Just finished watching it. Why did I start crying when Noriko appeared!!! And with the headscarf!! Ugh...the ending moved me. I do wish the second hour had been filled with something other than just bullets flying and things blowing up, kids dying and people screaming their name, and my wondering "wait who was that again😭" and "was that a student or a Wild 7 member😭"

Also lowkey realized I never really understood Kawada's escape plan in the first BR movie (which I just finished rewatching prior to this week's BRII rewatch). Like what do you mean he was the one who did the hacking and not Mimura. I totally missed something. I want to know what he did ToT I actually don't remember what he did in the book and manga either HAHA. I do love how the book, manga, and movie all differ from each other. (And as I mentioned before I am in the midst of re-reading the book in Japanese!!)

I had tried to watch BR I without subs (eh) and it allowed me to focus on the actors' voices and performances more. They were actually really good!! I love how most of the cast were just random newbies. Something about the cast felt so real...!!! Ugh nothing hits like BR anymore.

[rwqv]

bro mahito was such a good villain like he was the first villain that genuinely pissed me off.,, his writing is soo good i love it so bad but like comeee ONNNN

DADDYJAKU IS CRAZY WORK but i sgree full heartedly

pls im doubling over in pain godd GODDD i luv jjk analyses especially with megumi. no matter how bad i love gojo, megumi will always be my favoeite with his writing. my brother was super annoyed that he kept summoning mahoraga, kept flashbacking to sukuna sayinf "thats kinda a waste of your talents right?" and kept flashbacking to gojo saying hes not using all his potential ... but thats the point!!!!!!!!! hes falling behind compared to yuji and he knows it ... and hes super depressed and hes willing to summon mahoraga so much because he literally does NOT care about his life in the slightest that man actively wants to kill himself... UGHHH AND HIM BEING CALLED POTENTIAL MAN LIKE DID U GUYS EVEN READ SLASH WATCH THE SHOW...... THATS THE POINT hes like a foil of yuji AND a parallel to geto.

yghhh yuji sarcrifuce would tear me apart like i literally gave birth to yuji hes my baby my sonnn ... but i cant lie that would be a great ending

plot twist gojo comes back talking about some "im for real real!" LMFAOOOOOO jk ... as mych as i truth him to come back i think his like character development and arc was at a good enough point for him to die. like nanami's character did seem fully fleshed oht when he died but nobara (at the time) didnt seem that developed when gege killed her. but shes back baby so maybe we'll see more of her (in the remaining 5 chapters ........)

YES OMG UGH the gojo 30 questions was like the smallest glimpse we had of the gojo clan. what do you MEAN his parents are still alive and everythint TELL ME MOREEEUHHH..

did u see getos mom was on the popularity list thing rven tho we've never seen him LMFAOOO i just know shes bad asf

oh my god imb so mad. i wrote up a full lengthy response but i crashed and everythkng got deleted. ill type up what i remember but its pretty bad 😭 i was cooking before it gor deleted

ANYWAYS

i never actually thought of megumi that way holy shit… esp with the fight between toji and him in shibuya… like father: 0 cursed energy, no weapon vs. son: the 10 shadows technique and all his shikigami and he still “lost”. megumi would probably win if he couldve apply himself better. he def feels left behind just like geto did when gojo surpassed him quickly thats horrible

i feel so much more sympathetic to megumi now i feel bad 😢

ALSO ABOUT HOW HES DEPRESSED AND EVERYTHING AND WANTS TO DIE BECAUSE OF SUKUNA INHABITING HIM AND USING MEGUMI AS A WEAPON

i do also think gojos character arc is pretty finished. like i want him to come back but also he feels completed. he was the strongest but he lost (mommyraga saved sukunas ass) . gojo finally did what no one thought could be done, and he could no longer be used as a weapon (not cool yuta 😡) and he died on the same day that geto did + on the most romantic day.. i think gojo should finally truely rest now (with his shitty ass sleeping schedule he needs it)

to add on, gojo killed his best friend and had to watch as his adopted son was used as a weapon to kill him he needs to lay down and sleep. his whole sense of family too is pretty messed up w the clan things and also riko (i think they have a sibling bond but also it seems like he doesnt fully like her but that might just be siblings) and everyone who came close to him died

more things about the clan workings would have been cool too!1 the story only sorta fleshed out zenin but what about kamo? or gojo? like what would gojos parents think about gojo dying and stuff like that? the clans are supposed to be like a big part of jujutsu society but i feel like they barely get any screentime. did he love his parents? did his parents love him? did anyone love him as a kid? how did the clans clash back then?? like PPPLLLEEASSE WHAT ABOUT NORITOSHI AND HIS CLAMMN WHY

my point is gege is leaving so much open like the merger€? more character interactions would definitely allow people to feel better… what about cursed tools backstories? cursed speech clan? international sorcerers? i know everyone was like jjk is dragging on and everything but 5 chapters could not resolve these plotppoints

10 spinoff series with all slice of life fluff now PLS

GETOS MOM WOULD DEF BE A BADDIE all of his genes are from her majestic ahh bro… that nurse kenjaku(geto) relly shows it

OOH MY GOD I THOUGHT I POSTED THIS EARLIER WJOOPS SORRY

[linggluu]

woke up at 7am , wushu at 11.

so i spent all morning watching this documentary of this 102 year old man named 王成松 reuniting with his daughter in 2014.

in 1948/1949 he went out to buy salt and was suddenly forced to become a soldier for the kuomingtang. he wanted to keep his life obviously but he had 2 year old daughter at home. so he gave a relative some money (2 coins) wrapped in cloth and off he went to war. he ending up fighting for many years and then ended up in taiwan. he was wounded/maimed, pretty much illierate and no one could understand his accent from jiang su. it was hard to find a job so he ended up picking up trash/recycling. and later he learned out to make tofu to sustain himself. the taiwanese locals called him "uncle tofu" but no one knew his name, but he'd been around forever.

he tried writing many letters back home but it was as if a child wrote it because he was...almost illiterate. plus in the 70s/80's, the relationship between china/taiwan was tense,the geographical lines in cities/provinces changed it. It was pretty much impossible.

years went by. he didn't give up finding his daughter. one day a lady came and scammed most of his money by pretending she was his daughter.

one his 100th birthday, the head of the village asked what his wish was for his birthday and all he wanted was to find his kid. she put a posting in the paper about his name and details. except due to his accent, she wrote a different them like 汪伯伯 instead of 王伯伯。that posting didn't get much attention. later on she made another posting with the help of local charities with his correct name, the village where he was from , his daughter's name etc. The charity narrowed it down to 200 with his daughter's name.

They narrowed it down even more to women who had no parents/if they had a dad who went off to war. They finally got a hit with the correct Wang Xiu Lan, who was now 69. When she was two, her dad went off to war and he never came back. When she was 7, her mom remarried and left her with her father's 3rd uncle/wife and left her the two coins her dad left.

She was shocked because she had been burning paper money her whole life. Everyone in her family thought her dad was dead - they even received a merit/stipend for him supposedly dying in war.

The whole bus ride to the meeting place in Taiwan, she's crying because even though Uncle 3/his wife treated her well, everyone had parents to love them but she had no mom and no dad. They finally get to the meeting place, and this guy is 30 minutes late. Because he lives in this tiny shack on the side of the road and he locks it up with a lock and then spends 30 minutes wrapping up the lock in twine.

Finally this stopped old man in a walker comes in slowly , she reaches out to help and he's like "wait- don't do that. we haven't even talked yet."

And then to the crowd (people in the charity, the head of his village, he's like "I ask the questions. If anyone interupts me , it won't be good for you!" Because he's already been scammed of his life savings and couldn't stand another disappointment/scammer.

He's asking questions like "Where do you get you drinking water from?" and draws a diagram on the ground asking her specifically to point out where the well was when she said "a well".

He asked about his brother's name. He didn't believe her when she told him because he already put all those details in the paper. He asked about his aunt's name, and she'd be like "i don't know". (she was only two when her dad left lol. also in her defense, i don't know any relatives names older than my grandparents. i don't know my dad's aunt's name either)

he asked about his older brother. and she said "he's gone."

he asked about his 2nd older brother. and she said "he's gone."

and hes quiet. and it's like hes trying to prove shes an imposter.

and finally shes like "do you remember the coins you left? you had someone bring them to me. two coins. wrapped in cloth."

the man is quiet again and then the next thing he does is pull money out of his pocket saying he's going to treat everyone to dinner BECAUSE THIS IS HIS DAUGHTER. and the other thing he said was he wanted to make it up to her because he never did now his baby girl is 70 years old, married, has kids and grandkids of her own.

They later did a DNA test. THEY ARE FATHER/DAUGHTER. He sent up a going away dinner with all his friends in taiwan.

in 2015, his daughter comes to taiwan to bring him home, finally and also because he wanted to die at home. He leaves his little shack on the side of the road one last time. the village chief who set this whole thing in motion goes with them to the airport and she's crying and everyone's crying because she can't go further and the old man is in the wheelchair like "thank you for helping me find my daughter."

he goes home to his home town in Jiang Su which is developed with roads, houses, modern highways and buildings. when he left, all the houses were in the country side, undeveloped roads and shacks.

he see's pictures of his deceased older brothers and their wives. and he's crying because he's finally come home. he thanks them for raising his daughter and he finally came back but everyone's dead and gone. (but sir, thank you god you made it to 102 because this would not have been possible if you hadn't).

he goes to visit his parents graves, but the graves have been lost to him, covered in undergrowth and not even his daughter knows the exact spots now and he's sitting there and crying.

he ended up passing away in 2018, finally home.

anyways, i spent my entire day bawling my eyes out and doing chores, HOW ABOUT YALL?? </3

[violetlunette]

So, I wrote this after I came across posts about Bakagou and Tenya. In these, people would say things like, “Everyone goes on about Bakagou telling Izuku to kill himself, but never bring up that Tenya tried to murder someone,” or “People go on and on about Bakagou, but Tenya’s actions were worse and no one talks about him!” And so on. Due to getting distracted by something shiny, I temporarily forgot this argument. But I remembered it, I’m here, so, let’s get this posted because Tenya deserves better. (Keep in mind that one or two points might be outdated however.)

First of all, why are people comparing the two?? The situations were and are COMPLETELY different. But even if we did compare the actions of the two, I argue that Bakagou’s actions would still be worse than Tenya’s. Yup. I said it, and I’m going to explain why. This is mainly a Tenya defense post, but there are Anti-Bakugou and Bakugou Critical elements below. As I’m talking about Bakagou’s past, I will be kicking a dead horse and bringing up topics I’m sure we’re all sick of hearing by now. Oh, and yes, this is very opinion-based as the whole point is me explaining why I think Tenya has the moral high ground and why his actions didn’t bother me. There may also be some bias as while I don’t hate Bakagou I have an INTENSE dislike for him. Ye have been warned. ACTUAL TRIGGER WARNINGS: I will be discussing bullying, suicide baiting, and attempted murder. If any of these offend you, please move on.

Okay, so here’s the basics of the situation of each and their actions;

During the sports festival Tenya’s brother was attacked by a serial killer named Stain simply because Tensei wasn’t like All Might. He was severely wounded and hospitalized, almost dying. Luckily Tensei survived. Sadly though, he was disabled and injured to the point where he’d have to give up his hero career. Tenya is enraged at the man who did this to a big brother he idolized and worshiped. Blinded by rage and grief, Tenya decided to go after the Hero Killer and take him down. This almost got him killed, and Tenya had to be saved by his friends.

Bakagou was born with a powerful quirk that everyone thought was cool. Even before he got his quirk, Bakagou was shown to be smarter than the other kids, a talent he used to demean Izuku others. Because of these two qualities no one ever scolded him for his actions, so Bakagou did whatever the hell he wanted. Mainly, he bullied a boy his age with BOMB powers even though said boy couldn’t do ANYTHING to protect himself, for their entire childhood. Bakagou always wanted to be the strongest and felt a constant need to prove it.

“Wait a minute! Isn’t the whole point of this post is to explain why Tenya’s actions weren’t worse than Bakagou’s? How can you say that when Tenya tried to KILL someone. Bakagou was just a bully, right? How can you say he was worse?”

Well, let’s get into that, shall we?

First off, Tenya had a VALID reason for feeling the way he did unlike Bakagou (we’ll get to that).

Tenya’s beloved brother, who was also his hero, was almost murdered and severely injured!

Imagine seeing someone you loved at death’s door in a hospital attached to machines, tubes, and the like. Imagine spending hours/days--I don’t remember how long Tensei was in surgery--being able to do nothing except pray that person will live. And by some miracle, that person does live, only to discover that despite all those agonizing hours/days, he’s still going to have lasting injures. That he had officially lost EVERYTHING he spent years dedicating his life to every day. His entire lively hood was stripped away, and why? Because he didn’t meet some guy’s standards of “hero.”

Tensei wasn’t a bad hero. Far from it, he was actually a good hero and a genuine person. We get proof of this in “BNHA: Vigilantes” where we see that he’s a great guy with the best of intentions. However, just because he wasn’t exactly like All Might, Stain decided he wasn’t good enough and decided to end him (as far as I know, Stain meant to kill Tensei).

How would you feel in Tenya’s position? I can’t speak for anyone else, but my fury would go beyond words. So much so that I too would forego justice for vengeance. Would that be right? No, it would not. But here’s the thing; NO ONE EVER SAYS THAT IT IS. 

 No one pushes aside the fact that while Tenya’s feelings are understandable, his acts are NOT okay. He’s called out, scolded, and told WHY it’s wrong, that it’s not heroic of him to hunt someone in cold blood. And oh yeah—there are consequences for his actions. His recklessness and need for revenge almost results in four people getting killed, gets Manuel’s and Gran Torino’s teaching licenses revoked for 6 months along with a pay cut. He also almost loses his arm. The most important thing from all this, though? He learns his lesson and takes active steps to get better, which we SEE in action. Most importantly, Tenya never repeats the actions that got him and others in trouble. Again, he LEARNED his lesson.

Oh, and here’s something that people tend to overlook--

STAIN WAS A FUCKING SERIAL MURDER. He wasn’t some innocent individual. He wasn’t even just a thug! He was someone who actively hunted and murdered people for not meeting his standards of hero-dom.

It was wrong for Tenya to go after Stain because it placed TENYA in danger, and it’s not heroic to go after with the intent to kill. That being said, I’m not going to feel too bad that he wanted to put a crazy serial killer down.

Now let’s look at Bakagou;

As I stated at the start, Bakagou grew up arrogant because he was more intelligent than the other kids, had a great quirk, and was never scolded by anyone. No one even really called him out for being a jerk. (YMMV) Because of this, Bakagou grew a massive ego and wanted to prove that he was the best. As a result, he fought a lot of other kids. (It’s hinted he used to bully others as well, but I’m willing to bet the story changed that to “they challenged Bakagou first” shit.) And who was his main target? A QUIRKLESS child. Bakagou attacked someone over and over again who could NOT defend himself. To top it off, Bakagou got others to help attack Izuku as well. Did he purposely tell others to attack Izuku? None that I can see, but he did lead his friends and took pleasure when he saw others following his lead in class.

Stuff like this went on for TEN years. TEN. YEARS. From 4 to 14.

Time skip to the start of the story to Bakagou’s first interaction with Izuku. At age 14—old enough to have grown a conscience by then—is shown blowing up Izuku's desk, backing him against a wall, and taunting him. (In front of a teacher who doesn’t do a damn thing, btw.) Then when class is over Bakagou destroys Izuku’s notebook, throws it out the window, threatens him with violence once again, and then ends it by telling Izuku to jump off a roof so he can be reincarnated as someone with a quirk.

Why? Because he found out that Izuku wanted to go to UA. 

And the reason for all this? The reason for years of bullying? His hatred of Izuku? Because Bakagou couldn’t understand why Izuku was constantly kind, so he made up a bullshit reason in his head that Izuku was looking down on him. That’s it.

No tragic backstory, no CONFIRMED abuse in the story, nothing. Bakagou was just spoiled by society and felt insecure around a boy who actually acted heroically. Izuku did nothing to earn the abuse Bakagou did to him. Izuku was constantly kind and even risked his life to save Bakagou on multiple occasions. Yet, just because Izuku made Bakagou feel insecure about himself, he would lash out--with bomb powers--while doing everything he could to tear Izuku down.

There are several reasons I’m more sympathetic to Tenya;

First off, the target of Tenya’s rage, again, was a SERIAL KILLER. An adult who could always defend himself. (And did.) Not to mention Stain earned Tenya’s anger through his actions of TRYING to MURDER his brother and DISABLING said brother for petty reasons. That’s a valid reason to hate someone.

Now, I’ll admit that the validity of emotions is subjective, but I don't think that Bakagou feeling insecure about himself justifies years of torment. Especially when Izuku never did anything. All Izuku ever did was be kind and maybe tell him to stop picking on others.

The next reason I sympathize with Tenya and not Bakagou is the state of mind they were in when they performed these actions.

When Tenya went after Stain he was riding high on emotional turmoil. He wasn’t thinking clearly. His mind and judgment were clouded with grief and anger as someone he loved was hurt. It’s hard to think clearly under those conditions.

Meanwhile, every time Bakagou hurt someone his mind was clear. He knew EXACTLY what he was doing and in some cases they were premeditated. With a clear mindset, Bakagou chose actions that caused harm in some way. And why? Because it made him feel better. No one forced him and the only emotion pushing him was envy, it was a clear and conscious choice he made. And these were choices he made FOR YEARS. Hell, he even unleashed a move that he KNEW could have killed Izuku in a “calm” state.

There's also the aftereffect to take into consideration; No one was seriously injured by Tenya’s actions except maybe the murderer who was stopped and locked away. Izuku doesn’t have physical scars, but he does have mental and emotional scars. Before U.A. Izuku was terrified of Bakagou—and with good reason. He flinches instinctively when Bakagou raises his voice. His low self-worth? Result of Bakagou’s bullying. Whether the story is willing to admit it or not, his actions had a lasting effect on Izuku, and they still affected him to the present. (Until the narrative decided to casually push it to the side and hope no one noticed anything.) This brings me to my next—and admittedly pettiest—reason that allows me to forgive Tenya and not Bakagou is how the narrative treats them. As a person who loves stories, I tend to judge how a story reacts to its characters and their actions more than what the characters themselves do.

The story handles Tenya’s actions in a way that satisfying. There is not one moment when the narrative tries to justify, play down, or explain away Tenya’s actions. Every time it’s brought up, it’s mentioned as a failing on his part. Tenya was wrong to put himself in danger. It was wrong for him to go after Stain with the intent to kill. His recklessness not only almost got him killed but almost got him killed. Even Tenya admits he fucked up. And it didn’t take 300 chapters plus 11-10 years to realize this. He learned his lesson and got better. He realized that his actions were dangerous, and he never does it again. Tenya even tries to stop others from making the same mistake in the future. More importantly, he’s never rewarded for his actions.

We don’t get that with Bakagou. After a certain point, the narrative ignores or downplays Bakagou’s deeds, which I made an argument for in a past post.

It’s only recently that we start to address these issues, and even then they’re barely touched on.

Does Bakagou learn his lesson……...debatable, but I’ll be generous and say he has. Yet despite that, he still acts like the same arrogant brat he was in the beginning. He still attacks Izuku and tells him to die. He still charges into danger without thinking things through and has to make it all about him. (YMMV)

Is it all his fault? No. Bakagou was NEVER scolded for his actions. He was never told what he was doing was wrong by anybody. Maybe if SOMEONE had pulled Bakagou aside after he nearly killed a fellow student and told him, “Hey, I know you were playing the villain, however, as heroes we try to avoid killing people, and you went too far here.” MAYBE he would have learned the lesson sooner. Aizawa, All Might, I love you both but was it REALLY that hard to pull the kid aside and scold him? I’m not looking for public shaming here, just SOMEONE to tell him that he was wrong.

And maybe if the rest of the class would stop ignoring his action and treat him the way Class B treats Monoma, Bakagou would get the hint not to be an asshole to everyone he meets. But no one ever did, so it took over 200 fucking chapters for him to finally admit he was wrong.

But here’s the thing that gets me; Bakugou’s actions are usually rewarded, or ignored, no matter how bad they are. Think about it, when does Bakagou ever suffer as a result of his bullying? When does he suffer the consequences of hurting Izuku another?

Told Izuku to kill himself after threatening him with physical harm and destroying his property? Never brought up again. (And no, getting possessed by Sludgy doesn’t count. That wasn’t a result of his actions, it was bad timing.) Tried to kill Izuku while potentially endangering Ochaco and Tenya because he threw a hissy fit? Learns a part of Izuku’s secret and gets the first clue about OFA, then is comforted by the person he tried to kill AND All Might. Seriously, the worse he gets is a “grow up” from Aizawa the next day. (There are other moments as well, but I digress.) The point is that 8/10 his actions are ignored or rewarded by the narrative, which turns any sympathy points I may have had to irritation.

To summarize:

1: Tenya’s reasons for wanting to hurt Stain were valid and earn by something Stain did. Bakugou’s reasons for hurting Izuku FOR YEARS were out of petty jealousy and shit he made up.

2: Tenya went after a killer. Bakagou went after someone who couldn’t defend himself repeatedly for TEN YEARS.

3: Tenya wasn’t in his right mind when he went after Stain. Bakagou was in his right mind every time he hurt Izuku.

4: There were consequences for Tenya’s actions. There are none for Bakagou’s bullying.

5: Tenya learned his lesson right away and apologized to those he troubled. It took Bakagou forever to realize he was acting shitty.

6: The lasting damages of Tenya are minimum. Bakagou’s actions are overreaching the entire story, whether they’re brought up or not.

7: Tenya did it ONCE. And again, it was under emotional distress. Bakagou hurt Izuku time and time again for YEARS out of petty jealousy.

Again, these are two different circumstances and as I said you can’t compare the two. If you’re going to compare Bakagou to anyone, Endeavor’s the better fit.

[darkcircles4lyfe]

Death to All Might, Rebirth to Yagi Toshinori

So about All Might. I’ve been extremely wary of talking about what could happen to him because straight up saying “I don’t think he’s gonna die” is asking the universe to spite me. Plus it also feels like a room full of people turning to stare at me as if I said the Sun isn’t a star. Man has death flags everywhere, I know. 

But, okay, *Bill Nye voice* consider the following:

Mr. Yagi here, if he overheard everything, just received the final nail in the coffin on his career. His time as the symbol of peace is not only over, it was in fact partially responsible for the current state of things, since he once did so much on his own that his absence now makes heroes and civilians alike ill-prepared to cope. I think it was very apt for that one guy to be wearing an All Might shirt--he was acting as a mouthpiece for the latent societal problems embedded in All Might’s legacy. 

We know already that he’s been feeling useless. I love this scene and although I’m not gonna talk about it right this second, remember what Aizawa says about just “being here” being enough:

And we know from conversations with Inko that Toshinori is also reframed his purpose around looking after Izuku. But in the end, Izuku rejected his help, and it was his classmates instead who were able to save him. Now the very progress of humanity is rejecting him too. You may me wondering how on Earth I don’t see the logical conclusion of all this being his death. Hold on. It actually has a lot to do with the fact that we’re all expecting it. Nighteye himself saw it, and despite any contrary convictions anyone might have, the plot doesn’t seem to be veering away from that end. All Might Is Gonna Die, says absolutely everything. 

It’s occurring to me that I have previous experience with this kind of plotline that probably little to no one else in this fandom shares, being that I’ve read a certain book series in which the main character is told in no uncertain terms that he will die (no, I’m not talking about hp). The series in question is T*e Und*rland Chronicl*s (censoring so it doesn’t get put in their side of tumblr) and I’m sorry but I’m about to go on a shameless tangent about it and spoil the ending for you.

So in this series there is a prophecy in every book, each one having something to do with war and conflict, and so far all of them have been right. In the last book [mc] finds out that it’s prophesied that he will be killed. Lots of the things in the prophecies are convoluted and metaphorical, but no, this one literally says “when the [mc’s title] has been killed.” He spends the whole book coming to terms with this, and he gives into it, only to find himself waking up in the hospital instead. “Wow, plot twist. /s” you may be thinking, and yeah sure, the mc in a kids book survived, big shocker. But it doesn't end there. After the war, there are peace talks, but they escalate until the two sides are on the verge of declaring war again. And [mc], bless him, has just been caught in the middle of all of this the entire time. He’s sick as shit of fighting, of watching the suffering and death of people he cares about. He draws his sword against both of them angrily, gives a speech saying he won’t take a side, and then promptly breaks his sword across his knee: “There. [mc’s title in the prophecies] is dead. I killed him.” He’s giving a huge middle finger to everyone there, to the man who wrote the prophecies, to the entire fucked up culture of it all. And so something that was taken literally turns out to be metaphorical. That is, if you still believe in the prophecies at all.

Hopefully you’re catching my drift here. What I’m saying is, even though this other series has nothing to do with bnha, it goes to show sometimes it’s the most absolute certainties that are red herrings, and a “death” can consequently be a symbolic one. In All Might’s case, it could be the death of hero society and a rejection of his own past. In other words, character development for Toshinori himself that reflects on the way the world is changing, too. Also there’s the fact that the mc from that other series I’m trying not to name has an honorary title, and I’m imagining that role he occupied “dying” could correspond to something that amounts to, “All Might is dead. I (Yagi Toshinori) killed him.” 

And here’s another thing: we also have to ask ourselves what good a dead Toshinori is to Izuku, narratively speaking. Yes, Izuku has spent his whole life idolizing even the more toxic parts of All Might, and his idealized vision of his hero does need to “die.” But how about Toshinori as a father figure?  Izuku regretting that his last interaction with Toshinori was to reject his help may drive home the fact that he shouldn’t go off on his own, but at this point it’s kinda redundant. If anything it would negate some of the progress that was just made because it’d make him extra paranoid about losing other people too. To be honest, the whole “Uncle Ben” trope, the mentor/father figure who dies and gives the mc a reason to do better, is so tired. Experiencing the death of a loved one really doesn’t deserve to be romanticized like that. I might as well admit that I’m speaking from experience, and let me tell you, losing someone you love suddenly, when you weren’t around, and with unfinished business--it makes you paranoid as hell that it will happen again. It literally gives me nightmares. Y’all, I cannot stress enough that trauma does not equal character development. Granted, just because I know this doesn’t mean Horikoshi does, but in general he does seem to lead his characters toward healing.

Okay, back to the present. Toshinori is turning away from UA. He likely feels useless and rejected. We can infer that what happens next will involve Stain, and we have a couple of extra clues to go with it: Stain considers All Might a true hero, and has stated that he would let All Might kill him. And since Horikoshi loves his parallels, we also have this fight between Endeavor and this random villain who admires him so much that he wants to die by Endeavor’s hand:

This suggests a confrontation in which Stain challenges All Might to live up to himself as he once was, so that as a hero he can vanquish Stain and symbolically overcome society's perversion of that role. But based on what All Might has learned about the system he upheld, Stain is wrong. All Might is not a “true hero” in the sense that the societal issues Stain witnessed exist not in spite of All Might, but (in part) because of him, because he took too much of the responsibility for himself.

Stain probably had no idea about the personal cost of All Might’s lonely burden until after the fact. Maybe he’s seeing it now. So then perhaps the confrontation would be more about Stain claiming he’s just as fake as the rest. Either way, Toshinori has the opportunity to denounce himself and be rid of “All Might,”  to stop living in his own shadow. Nighteye’s vision has been defied before, and I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if the combination of society shifting + Toshinori’s own conviction is enough to do it again and work fate in his favor.

He is not All Might. He is Yagi Toshinori: quirkless, worn down, and directionless except for his dedication to Izuku. If he survives his interaction with Stain, he can resolve his imperfect mentorship by confessing about his shortcomings and simply supporting Izuku as a part of his family, not as his teacher (as Aizawa said, just “being there”). And that’s how you really get character development, for both of them. I mean, shit, imagine Toshinori straight up telling Izuku to stop calling him All Might.

[raibebe]

Love Is On Air

Genre: fluff & smut Words: 8.722 Prompt: radio host Johnny x secret admirer female reader Warnings: soft dom Johnny, oral (f receiving), safe sex, dirty talk

A/N: Finally: My entry for the February event of my lovely network @neosmutcollective​. This is totally not the fic I planned on writing. In fact this was started way later after I realized I was never going to finish my original fic on time. Not that this one is on time... Special thanks to everyone who sent our lovely DJs some music recommendations @sly-merlin​, @moonctzeny​, @lenaluvs​, @lucas-wongs​, @burtonized​ and to @ncteaxhoe​ who helped me figure out this idea. I hope you enjoy this even though it’s wayyy too late.

You hurried home to your apartment after your last class of the day that was horrifically late because of whoever had fucked up your schedule this semester. Panting heavily, you busted into your room and threw your jacket and backpack somewhere onto your couch, diving straight for your laptop that was perched on your desk. Cursing the old thing, you waited for agonizing minutes until it had booted up and your browser was open. You quickly opened the familiar page of your university’s campus radio just in time to hear the familiar voice saying: “Hi I’m John-D, welcome to NCT Night Night.” After that both hosts chuckled lowly before Jaehyun spoke: “Tonight we’ll read some of the letters you wrote us over the week again and we will try our best to help you out with whatever problems you throw our way.” “Exactly. Right after we play this song that was suggested by evangelie_99 over on our Twitter, it’s Pluto Projector by Rex Orange County and she said that she loves our show. We’re glad you like it so much, darling. This one is for you,” Johnny softly said before the soft tunes of the song filled your little one-room apartment.

Sighing, you leaned back in your chair, carelessly toeing your shoes off. Listening to NCT Night Night was your escape at night from the stress that classes brought you. The two DJs that were on air every Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday were your favorites though. Not only did they have great chemistry but they both could be incredibly funny as well as soothe all your nerves with their calming voices – especially Johnny or John-D as he was called on their show. You might have developed a slightly embarrassing crush on the fratboy with a heart as sweet as his voice from what you knew about him from his radio shows and your shared classes. Since they had started their weekly segment where they would read out letters that students could send them, you had gathered the courage to send Johnny little messages about how you were crushing on him and it had quickly become a running gag on the show. Jaehyun would tease Johnny about it every week while Johnny kept insisting that his secret admirer should just talk to him. But how could you do that? Johnny was everything one could want in a boyfriend. Not only was he ridiculously tall and devastatingly handsome but he was also smart, always seemingly staying on top of his classes and he also went to the gym regularly if his thirst traps on his Instagram stories were anything to go by. When he wasn’t giving out advice in a gentle voice on their radio program, he was out partying with his frat brothers on the weekends more often than not complaining about headaches on their Sunday show. How could you just walk up to him and talk to him? Right. You couldn’t. So you had to resign to sending him anonymous love letters through his radio show.

“Welcome back, hi,” Johnny chuckled once the song had gently faded out and you couldn’t help but giggle along. “That was Pluto Projector by Rex Orange County,” Jaehyun tried to stay on script but you could almost hear the grin on his face because of Johnny’s antics, “If you want your song to play on today’s show, please suggest something over on our Twitter with the hashtag,” Jaehyun paused momentarily and let out a dramatic sigh before continuing, “hashtag JohnDplaymelikeaviolin.” Jaehyun hadn’t even read the whole hashtag out loud when Johnny was already bursting out in laughter and how could you not laugh along with his melodic laughter. “I swear to god I am never letting you choose hashtags for our show ever again,” Jaehyun groaned while Johnny sounded like he was still dying in the background. “Don’t be mean to me Jaehyunie,” he whined and even though today’s episode was not viewable, you could vividly imagine how he was pouting. While the two friends were busy bickering and talking about what they had done since their last show, you pulled up your own Twitter to send a recommendation in.

“Aaaah, I see we’re already getting plenty of suggestions. Sly-merlin suggested us Sexy Dirty Love by Demi Lovato – a great song – and added ‘I wish John-D would actually play me like a violin.” After a potent silence, Johnny broke out in laughter again. “And this is why you won’t choose any more hashtags,” Jaehyun groaned again. “Baby,” Johnny rasped into his mic and even though you weren’t wearing headphones, it sent tingles down your spine, “Just come to our frat party on Friday and I’ll see what I can do.” “Stop plugging our parties on the radio,” Jaehyun scolded the elder, the slap audible over the radio, “Also sly-merlin has to stand in line. You still have your number one admirer who has sent in a letter yet again.” “She still hasn’t come up to me,” Johnny shared, “I can only keep up my chastity for so long. I am saving myself for this girl.” You know he was joking but you were just a simple woman and even in your secluded home, you felt heat rising to your cheeks, your thumbs stopping on your keyboard where you had typed out your song recommendation. Both DJs shared a quiet laugh before Jaehyun asked: “And you really don’t know who she is?” “I really don’t man,” his friend sighed, “Like I have my suspicions because she has to be in my major if she sees me in class that often. That or she’s a stalker which I do not want to think about. But for real, hit me up. I’ll take you out for a coffee.” “Now everyone is going to come up to you and claim that they’re her.” “I’ll take that risk,” Johnny laughed, “Maybe I’ll finally meet the love of my life and settle down.” At that Jaehyun snorted loudly. “The woman that can make you settle down gets free coffee for like a month from me.” “Watch me have a wife and kids at 25 Jae, just to spite you,” his friend snorted, “But up until then, let’s play sly-merlin’s song recommendation: Sexy Dirty Love by Demi Lovato.”

While the song was playing, you finished up your own tweet and hit post before you grabbed your bag that you had carelessly thrown away before to get out your notes. You actually had to start a project for one of the classes you and Johnny actually did share. The professor had announced that he would announce the pairings for a group project tomorrow and you didn’t want to seem like an actual idiot if your group would decide to already meet up and discuss after class. So while you listened to your favorite DJs discuss the questions and worries of whoever had sent them to their email address, you worked through the notes you had taken over the last couple of weeks, trying your best to organize them to remember the key points.

“Oh John-D, I have a very special letter here,” Jaehyun said, waving the paper in front of the microphone so it would pick up the wiggling noises. “What could that be?” Johnny asked with over-exaggerated interest. “It’s from your secret admirer, John-D. So I think you should read it out.” Just like every time, they read your letter, your heart began beating faster and faster in your chest until you were sure, it would break free from your ribcage. “Okay, here I go,” Johnny announced while Jaehyun was playing the same cheesy music he always played when they were reading your letters, “Happy Thursday, John-D. The weekend is almost in reach, keep up the energy for the last day of classes! – she’s so sweet, I’m holding up alright – One of my professors will announce the pairings he made for a group project soon and I am nervous. I don’t have many friends in the course and I’m praying that I will get good group mates I can work well with.” “Oooh, I get that struggle,” Jaehyun interrupted, “I once had to work with a bunch of stoners and ended up doing all the work for a presentation that made up 30 percent of my grade. Worst experience of my life, would not recommend. But we’re wishing you all the luck.” “But you know what’s more interesting about this story?” Johnny tuned in, “Coincidentally my professor for my literature class is assigning our group projects tomorrow as well. Say, my sweet admirer, are you perhaps in the same literature class as me?” In your otherwise silent room, the panicked squeak you let out was loud even to your ears. There was no way Johnny could figure out who you were, there were probably at least 20 more girls with a crush on him in that class alone, so you were safe. “Oooh, so maybe she’s a lit major so that’s why she’s writing love letters.” “Could be but lots of people from different majors are taking that class,” Johnny argued, “Anyways, back to her letter. But I won’t let that disturb me! I will be doing my best regardless! – That’s the spirit – I’ll work through my notes as I listen to your honey voice so I can be prepared. I’m glad you don’t do viewable radios on Thursday’s or else I wouldn’t be able to get anything done, you’re just too distracting John-D,” at that Jaehyun let out a fake gag while Johnny just giggled softly, “Thank you secret admirer, I do clean up quite nicely if I do say so myself. – On last Sunday’s episode you melted my heart when you hid in your hoodie for half the show. – God that was the worst hangover I had in a looong while, I was so miserable.”

“You should have seen him at home,” Jaehyun laughed, “I had to physically drag his whole 180-something-centimeters body first into the shower, then into the car and into the station. He is the biggest crybaby when he’s hungover.” “Don’t expose me like that, Jaehyunie,” Johnny whined loudly, “I was dared to drink a bunch of tequila and my mother didn’t raise neither a quitter nor a coward.” “No, but clearly an idiot,” the younger DJ laughed his deep laugh. “Let me read my love letter in peace,” the other grumbled, “I couldn’t follow for half the show because I was so focused on watching you. Not in a creepy way of course! – Of course not,” Johnny chuckled, “I hope you finished that essay you had to work on after the show in time and still had some time to relax. – I did, don’t worry.” That you already knew when Johnny had handed in his essay in another class you two shared just before you had handed in yours and he had thrown you a little smile that had kept you going through the whole day. “Take care of yourself and keep smiling your beautiful smile, I look forward to seeing you again on Sunday or in classes. And fighting to Jae-D as well of course! – I look forward to hearing from you again, secret admirer. I bet your group project will go just fine, don’t worry too much. If anyone is mean to you, just expose them here and we’ll fight them for you.” “Love that she acknowledged me in one sentence as well,” Jaehyun grumbled, cutting off the cheesy music abruptly. “You’re just jealous you don’t have a sweet admirer who sends you cute messages,” the other teased his friend. “Yeah, yeah, shut up and put that letter in the box under your bed.” “It’s in my sock drawer, thank you very much.”

Giggling, you listened to the two friends bicker, your chest warm with a feeling you were scared to put a name on. “Anyways, I think it’s time for another music recommendation you can still send in via our lovely hashtag JohnDplaymelikeaviolin. This one is from lenaluvies and she says: Please play Hurts So Good by Astrid S thank you. No, thank you for sending something in darling. This one’s for you,” Johnny announced and you couldn’t help but laugh a little pained laugh. That song title hit a little too close to home for your liking. The rest of the radio show went by smoothly and Johnny and Jaehyun tried to help a handful of more students with their problems that couldn’t be more diverse. From a boy who had fallen in love with his best friend which had send him into an identity crisis over to a girl who was failing her classes because she claimed the professor hated her to a freshman who wanted to apply for a fraternity but was scared because of the rumors surrounding them which the DJs quickly debunked since they both were in the same fraternity. In the end they had to cut themselves short, asking their viewers to vote on a poll they would make if people wanted a whole Tuesday episode surrounding fraternities.

“So.” “So,” Johnny copied his friend. “We’re almost at the end of our time with you guys. We couldn’t get through all of your submissions but we hope our team picked a few good ones and at least some of you could get some advice.” “As always you’re free to send us your own stories to our e-mail JohnJaeNNN@NCTU.com to get some advice next Thursday from your favorite DJs: John-D.” “And Jae-D. Every Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday on your campus radio on 127mHz. On NCT-“ “Night Night,” they said their ending together and just like every night with them, you said goodnight to your computer screen, closing the tab which draped your little apartment in silence. Sighing loudly, you looked over your notes that needed a little more work if you wanted to make a good first impression on your fellow students tomorrow. Because you couldn’t stand the silence, you opened your Spotify to play the NCT Night Night playlist Johnny and Jaehyun had made with the songs that had been recommended to them, still missing the new additions from tonight.

The next morning found you in your literature class, sitting two rows behind Johnny, staring at the back of his head while doodling on your paper rather than taking notes on whatever the professor was saying. If you were to let your eyes wander, you’d see that almost everyone in the big room was paying as much or even less attention as you were; the students in different states of excitement and anxiety over the group projects he had yet to announce. “I’m sorry professor,” Johnny’s voice suddenly cut through the room, “I’m sure you have already noticed that no one is paying attention to whatever you’re trying to teach us right now. Could you please just announce the groups for the project?” That moment you swore you would be able to hear a pin drop until your eccentric professor chuckled lowly. “I like you, Suh. I was waiting for someone to mention it,” he spoke, getting the dreaded list out of his bag, “Listen closely now, you’ll be assigned in groups of four and each group will get a specific novel to work on. Deadline will be by the end of the semester and your individual paper combined with the group presentation will make up 40% of your final grade.” That made a bunch of people, including you, gasp out loudly. A group project with this much credit to your final grade was always dreaded. “I don’t want to hear any complaints, that’s how it’s always been. Now listen carefully, I won’t repeat myself but the list will be hung on our blackboard as well.” With that being said, the professor began listing names and novels in the most monotone voice he could muster. To say you were basically vibrating off of your seat was an understatement when he got further and further down the list and neither yours nor Johnny’s name had been called yet. “And lastly, an all-time favorite: Romeo and Juliet.” You didn’t even register anything else after the professor had announced that the group featured both Johnny and you along with two other students you didn’t know. Your brain was reduced to static noise while everyone else was getting up around you to pick up the books that had already been stacked in a corner, probably by a poor TA. Only when a person bumped into you, you broke from your stupor to quickly pick up your stuff as well to hurry down to steps to where a crowd of students had already gathered.

Luckily Johnny towered over most of the other students and you could easily spot him and the rest of your group that were two other boys you didn’t recognize. “Hey, you’re the last one we were missing,” Johnny smiled and handed you over your copy of the book. “Y... Yeah, sorry for making you wait,” you stuttered, clutching the small book tightly in your hands. “No big deal,” Johnny played it off, “Do any of you have any more classes today?” When everyone declined, you all agreed that you should get a head start on your project as it would be hard to make a good project out of such an overused love story. While walking over to the student center to decide on a concept, conversation flowed easily between the four of you even though you were still really nervous to be around Johnny. God, you really hoped he didn’t think you were stupid or something just because you were nervous.

The little study session went by in a blur and only further confirmed that you were so whipped for Johnny it wasn’t even funny anymore. You found yourself attentively listening to all of his ideas and laughing at every of his stupid little jokes and only mildly spacing out while looking at Johnny when the others were discussing ideas which had led to one or two mildly embarrassing situations where you would lose track of what you were actually discussing, your mind blank of any input when they asked for your opinion.

Soon you found yourself parting ways with your groupmates, leaving you and Johnny alone because his frat house and your little apartment were located in the same general direction. “Anything fun you’re doing this evening?” Johnny asked, trying to make some light conversation to fill the silence. “No, I’ll just binge watch some shows maybe or listen to the campus radio,” you shrugged it off. While today’s show wasn’t your favorite, you quite liked the DJs soft and gentle voice. “You listen to the campus radio? I have a show on there,” Johnny smiled. “I like listening to you and Jaehyun,” you confessed, trying to fight the heat that was licking at your cheeks. “Oh.” “You seem surprised.” “Yeah, it kind of still seems weird that people enjoy listening to Jae and me rambling for hours on end. You know with him it just feels like I’m hanging out with my brother rather than work.” “Your voices are really soothing, you know,” you tried to explain what you were feeling when listing to them, “And your friendship is kind of adorable. Like we can feel how much you care about each other and you always genuinely try to help your listeners without making fun of them.” For a while Johnny didn’t say anything and you thought you had fucked it up, that he thought you were weird now. “Thank you,” he suddenly said. “Huh?” “It means a lot hearing that. We do lurk on Twitter to see what people think of our show but hearing it like this is something else entirely.” “It’s nothing,” you mused, playfully hitting his arm, “No need to get this soft.” “Hey,” he laughed, “I’ll have you know that I am 180 centimeters of walking softness despite what people might say about me.” Smiling softly you caught his eyes for the first time since you two had started walking and the way his honey eyes were smiling back at you momentarily took your breath away.

“I- My room is right around here, sooooo,” you stuttered. “It was nice working with you. Even though you were spacing out half the time,” Johnny teased, “Thinking about a special someone?” You. The word sat on the tip of your tongue, the low light of the afternoon sun making you bolder than you actually were and Johnny just made you feel incredibly comfortable. “No... No- I- I’m single.” “A crush then?” “Something like that,” you mumbled, your fingers nervously playing with the hem of your jacket. “Talk to him. Or her. Or them,” Johnny advised. “I really can’t,” you sighed, “He doesn’t even know I exist.” “Well you don’t need to confess your undying love for him,” he laughed, not knowing he was the boy in question, “Just you know. Casually talk to him. Get to know him.” “I’ll try?” “Is that a question?” “Yeah?” “Have more confidence in yourself,” he gently nudged you, “You’re nice and very easy to talk to.” “Nice... Wow.” “Shut up,” he laughed, “I usually give better compliments but I have yet to get to know you better.” “Would you... Would you even want that?” “Sure,” Johnny shrugged and your heart skipped a couple of beats, “I have to get going or everybody will already be drunk when I arrive. So... I’ll see you in class? And you’ll hear me on Sunday?” “Yeah sure. Don’t drink too much or you will be miserable all show like last week,” you giggled. “Don’t remind me,” he groaned, “I’m never going to drink tequila on a Saturday ever again.” “Goodbye Johnny,” you smiled, really liking how his name sounded when you said it out loud. “Bye,” he waved before going his way.

Once you were sure he was out of hearing distance, you let out a little happy squeak and jumped up and down excitedly. You did it. You had actually done it. You had talked to your crush. And managed to not make a complete fool out of yourself in front of him. Which was a win in your books. A huge win. With a little spring in your steps, you stepped by one of your favorite pizza places to treat yourself before heading home where you spend your evening daydreaming about none other than Johnny while watching reruns of old dramas.

“Hi, I’m Jae-D.” “And I am John-D. Welcome to NCT-“ “Night Night.” “John-D.” “Yes, Jae-D,” Johnny chuckled. “It’s Thursday again which means it’s time to tend to our listener’s worries,” Jaehyun read off of the script, not getting distracted by his friend’s antics, “And today is a very special episode.” “Special?” Jaehyun barely repressed to roll his eyes at his friend’s over-exaggerated acting before continuing: “Yes, since tomorrow is a day off for all students, we have decided to make this episode extra lengthy and-“ he shortly stopped to flash the camera a peace sign, “Viewable despite it being Thursday.” “Do we look okay?” Johnny laughed, checking himself out in the video that was playing on one of their monitors. “Aaaaah, the comments say we look good tonight, thank you,” Jaehyun mused.

And they really did. Not that either of them had to do a whole lot to look good but today they were both wearing white button-downs with their sleeves rolled up to expose their forearms. Jaehyun had even gone so far as to put on some fake glasses. “And if you’re following us on our Twitter you also already know that this week it’s all about love on our campus radio and our show today is no exception,” Johnny read his part of the script. “Today John-D and Jae-D are Loveholics, trying our very best to help you with your problems surrounding love,” Jaehyun completed, “You can send in song recommendations through the hashtag JohnJaeLoveholic just like taryn1026 did – I hope I said that right – but they recommended Paris in the Rain by Lauv to set the mood for today.”

The soft tunes of the song made you relax a little into your sofa where you had chosen to watch today’s episode of NCT Night Night. You had to say that you were kind of nervous for today’s episode. Just like every week you had written your letter to Johnny, telling him about your week and cheering him on for your group project. At this point it should have been pretty obvious just who exactly you were and judging by how Johnny was acting towards you, his flirting leaving you flustered after your study sessions and your group mates mildly annoyed, he seemed to already have put together the pieces. But yesterday while writing your letter you had felt extra bold (and maybe also extra riled up and horny from Johnny’s shameless flirting) and had written him a message that should confirm all his suspicions and would hopefully lead him straight to you and into your bed. But until the end of the show or at least until they read your letter, which you really hoped they did today as well, you had to wait sitting in your apartment, for once not in comfortable clothes but in a nice shirt and pants.

“That was Paris in the Rain by Lauv, recommended to us by taryn1026 through our Twitter with the hashtag JohnJaeLoveholic,” Johnny’s raspy voice filled your apartment when he leaned close to the mic, “Jae-D are you ready to make some love happen?” “I already had my love juice,” Jaehyun answered, showing his pink Starbucks drink to the camera, “And my reading glasses are on.” As to prove his point, he hiked his glasses up his nose before scratching his eye through the holes in the frame, making both DJs chuckle. For the next hour Johnny and Jaehyun tried to solve several relationship dramas as well as a very tricky friends-with-benefits situation and telling a boy to break up with his cheating girlfriend which had been a rather heartbreaking discussion. “So after this,” Jaehyun sighed, “Let’s play another song recommendation. Burtonized has sent in a very fitting song, I hope you all don’t mind a little Korean: It’s God Damn by I.M – a song about heartbreak.”

While the foreign song was playing, the two DJs stretched their backs and sipped on their respective drinks: Jaehyun still on his pink sugar concoction and Johnny already on his second iced Americano. Jaehyun must have found something funny on his phone, nudging his friend to look at him but Johnny was busy typing away on his own, only acknowledging his friend after he had typed his message. Just after that, your own phone buzzed with a message, showing Johnny’s name on the screen.

From: Johnny Are you watching our show?

To: Johnny Sure, you look good today

From: Johnny Make sure to listen closely ;)

“That was God Damn by I.M suggested by burtonized over our Twitter hashtag JohnJaeLoveholic,” Jaehyun’s smooth voice tore you from your spiraling thoughts about the winking face Johnny had sent. “Sadly our show is coming to an end even with our extended airtime.” “But John-D a very important letter is still missing before we close our show. Dare I say it could be the highlight of our show,” Jaehyun joked, already playing the cheesy music he was always playing when Johnny would read your letters. “You’re right Jae-D my lovely secret admirer has sent in another letter,” Johnny mused, arranging himself so he could read the printed out letter while being as close as possible to the mic for it to pick up the rasp in his voice, “Happy Thursday John-D, I hope your week has been more exciting than mine. I have just been going from class to class without much thought, the only high points are my group meetings for the group project we have to hand in soon – That seems very familiar, baby – But since today is all about love, I’ll tell you about a little problem I have: – get your love juice ready, Jae – There is this boy in my group. And boy isn’t really the right word to describe him, he’s a man really,” at that Johnny couldn’t hold back a low chuckle, “I’m sorry, I’ll be serious – And he is flirting with me. Has been for a couple of weeks now. And it has gotten to the point where our groupmates are kind of annoyed at us. He has also walked me home a couple of times but he never so much as touched me. At this point I am so frustrated with him. Is he just playing with me? Or is his mouth bigger than his actions actually are? He has been riling me up all day today and I was ready to let him have his way with me but he only wished me goodnight and left again, leaving me to deal with what he had done all by myself – oh wow, I,” Johnny stuttered, sharing a gaze with his friend who was only barely repressing his laughter, “Wow, okay, I hope we’re in the good for reading this out and it’s late enough,” clearing his voice and raking a hand through his hair, Johnny continued, “John-D I hope this man hears what he has done to me and will deal with the consequences of his actions. Would you play Animal by Jin Yosef and RIELL for me? Just in case this letter hasn’t gotten my point across? – Y... Yeah sure, darling. We’ll play that once our show is over.”

“So John-D,” Jaehyun grinned while loudly slurping on his ‘love juice’, “What would you advice your secret admirer to do about this problem?” “Well if I were her,” Johnny started, his gaze going straight to the camera where he knew you were watching and it felt like he was looking straight into your soul, “I’d wait for him. I’m pretty sure he can prove that his actions speak even louder than his words.” For a while it was quiet between the two DJs, safe for Jaehyun’s obnoxiously loud slurping noises but even if they would have been saying anything, you weren’t sure if you could have comprehended any words with how furiously your heart was beating. “Anyways,” Jaehyun eventually broke the silence once he was sure there was nothing left in his ‘love juice’, “I’m afraid that was it for tonight. This has been your extra lengthy episode of Jae-D and John-D and we will leave you with this wonderful song recommendation: Animal by Jin Yosef and RIELL. If you’ve liked today’s show, we’re here every Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday night on your campus radio on 127mHz to listen to all of your worries on NCT-“ “Night Night,” Johnny joined in and they both waved into the camera as your song of choice started playing. The video stream didn’t cut off immediately, showing the boys gathering their things and if your eyes weren’t betraying you, you swore you saw Johnny tense up when the song turned a little more explicit. The two DJs waved to the camera one last time before the stream cut off, leaving the screen of your laptop dark.

That was when it dawned on you what you had done. Shit. With how Johnny had sounded, you probably had about fifteen to twenty minutes until he would be at your doorstep. Oh god. Shit. Taking a couple of deep breaths, you tried to ground yourself before hurriedly closing your laptop and cleaning everything that seemed messy in your little one-room apartment. That was until you heard a knock on your door.

With shaky hands, you slowly opened the door and while you knew who would be standing on the other side, you weren’t ready for how he was going to look like: Johnny was leaning against the doorway casually with his arms crossed over his chest so the tight button-down he was wearing would strain over the planes of his chest muscles but what really reeled you in was how dark his eyes looked when he raked them over your body. “Good evening miss,” he drawled. “Hi,” you breathed. “Tell me what you want so I’m not misinterpreting any of this,” Johnny all but growled, one of his hands coming up to cup your face. “I want you to have me.” If you thought his eyes were dark before, they turned into bottomless black orbs once the words had left your lips. “You don’t know what you’re asking for, baby.” “Please,” you whimpered and that seemed to break Johnny’s resolve as he pulled you close to him and all but crashed his lips into yours. The kiss wasn’t delicate in any way, shape or form with how Johnny was licking into your mouth the second a moan left your lips. His tongue was intertwining with yours messily and in no time both of you were panting into each other’s mouths. “Inside. Now,” you rasped. “All with due time,” Johnny chuckled but let you pull him into your apartment, slamming the door shut to crowd you against it, one of his strong thighs slipping between your legs like it belonged there, “If you’re a good girl and listen well, I’ll give you anything you want.” “Fuck,” you cursed before slamming your lips together again, a new neediness bleeding into the kiss as you tugged on the longer strands of hair at the back of Johnny’s neck which made him growl lowly. “Anything off-limits?” Johnny breathed into your skin as he kissed down your neck to suck a mark there while his hands were busy pulling your shirt from your pants so he could rake them over your naked skin. “Just,” you had to cut yourself off with a moan, “Don’t be mean to me.” “Never,” he promised, “You’ll be my pillow princess.” His sweet words were in stark contrast to how hard his hands were gripping your hips and how his teeth were grazing over your neck that must be littered with marks already. “Take me to bed,” you heaved breathlessly, positive your legs would give out if it wasn’t for Johnny holding you up.

Listening to your demand, he slowly started walking you backwards towards your bed until the two of you were toppling down on top of the covers, his lips never leaving your skin. Whoever had spread the rumors about Johnny being a great lover had been absolutely right, he knew just how to touch you to have you gasping for air and judging by the grin on his lips he hadn’t even started yet. “Please,” you whimpered, arching into his touch, not exactly sure what exactly you were asking for but Johnny seemed to know all the better when he freed you from your top and pants to leave you in your matching lace set while he was still fully clothed in his by now wrinkled button-up and pants. “All for me?” He chuckled and pressed a kiss right between the valley of your breasts, his big hands cupping the soft flesh to squeeze it gently. “Have me,” you gasped out and you could feel the growl he let out vibrating where you were pressed together. “I’m going to ruin you,” Johnny promised, pulling down the cups of your bra to wrap his plush lips around one of your nipples to tease the soft nub until it hardened under his ministrations, sending waves of pleasure down your spine and straight to your core where you could feel your wetness starting to seep into the fabric of your panties. “Johnny,” you mewled and arched into his every touch, his calloused fingertips setting your skin alight when he let them travel down your body to tease over your lower stomach. As if by reflex, you let your thighs fall open for him to finally touch you where you needed him the most. “Such a good girl,” he smiled, blowing cold air over your spit-slicked nipple to watch you squirm beneath him. Your remark got stuck in your throat when he finally cupped you through your panties, feeling how damp the fabric had already become. “Naughty,” he chuckled, his eyes never leaving your face as he circled your clit through the fabric, watching your eyes fluttering shut when his gaze became too intense.

“Johnny,” you sighed, forgetting all other words except for his name. “Relax, princess,” he rasped and kissed his way down your body, leaving love bites on the sensitive skin of your stomach and thighs that shook with anticipation. If you’d say you hadn’t dreamed about his lips on you like this, you would lie and you weren’t going to miss the sight of this for nothing. Fighting back the fog that had started to cloud your mind, you forced your eyes open to look down to where he had settled between your open thighs to find him staring right back at you. “Good girl,” he praised you again before pressing a kiss over your clothed sex that made your head fall back already, the anticipation of what was to come making you push up your hips which made Johnny chuckle lowly. He didn’t leave you any time to feel embarrassed by how needy you were when he hooked your panties to the side unceremoniously and licked a broad stripe up your center, tasting your arousal. “Oh fuck,” you breathed out, your hands flying down to tangle them in the long strands of his hair. Johnny worked his tongue in slow and clever strokes, leaving your mind reeling with pleasure and taking his time to take you apart piece by piece, not even paying attention to your leaking center or your aching clit. But when he did wrap his lips around your clit to gently suck on the nub, your mind almost went numb with how intense his touch was, your thighs clamping shut around him. To make it even worse, he started humming around you while prying your thighs back open, holding you down with his large hands. You felt your orgasm approach almost embarrassingly fast now that he was altering between teasing your clit with his tongue, lips and even his teeth and fucking your velvety walls with his tongue, setting your nerve endings on fire. “Johnny I’m close,” you warned him but instead of slowing down, he stretched his jaw wide to press his tongue further into you, his nose bumping into your clit in the process and with the combined sensation and his doubled effort, it took no time for your first orgasm of the night to wash over you, a scream of his name leaving your lips as you shook through it, your mind going equally as numb as your legs.

When you came back to it, Johnny had straightened up between your legs and he was grinning down at you while he was unbuttoning his shirt, his face still shiny with your arousal. “That was the first one,” he spoke darkly. “Come here,” you whined, making grabby hands for him until he took pity on you and covered your body with his before connecting your lips in a bruising kiss. You could still taste yourself on his lips but that somehow just made it even hotter.

“Want you inside me,” you panted against his lips when Johnny broke the kiss in favor of raking his teeth over your racing pulse. “Yeah?” He rasped and ground his hips down into yours, making you feel him strain against the fabric of his pants. “Need it,” you moaned at the sweet friction. “Think you can take me?” He laughed as he leaned back on his hunches to pop open the button of his pants, pulling down the zipper agonizingly slow. With wide eyes you watched him push his pants down his narrow hips, leaving him in just his navy boxers that showed the sizable imprint of his hard cock, the fabric against the head dark from where he had leaked precum. Chuckling, he stroked over the outline and just the sight alone made your mouth water. “Show me,” you breathed, spreading your thighs so he could see your needy core, clenching around nothing. “Hmm,” he hummed, dragging one of his fingers that wasn’t preoccupied with teasing himself through the mess of arousal and his saliva between your legs, only barely dipping it into you to feel the muscles trying to suck him inside. “Don’t tease me,” you whined high in your throat. “But I like seeing you squirm,” Johnny grinned but took mercy on you and sunk his finger into you up to the knuckle, gently pumping it inside you. Still sensitive from how intense your last orgasm had been, you were torn between pulling away and wanting more but Johnny made the decision for you when he pulled his finger out, wiping your arousal onto your thigh.

“Eyes on me,” he commanded and finally freed his cock from his briefs. “Fuck.” The curse left your lips without even noticing at the sight of his flushed cock, too heavy to properly stand up against his toned abs. The tip was tinted red and shiny with precum that Johnny generously spread down that whole length, his eyes not leaving yours as you watched him lazily jerk himself. “Like what you see?” You eagerly nodded your head. “Want it inside me.” “Yeah? Show me.”

Throwing all caution out of the window, you quickly sucked two of your fingers between your lips before guiding them to your weeping core to slip them inside you, letting out an over-exaggerated moan as you crooked them. “Oh you’re so naughty, baby,” Johnny groaned, squeezing the base of his cock tightly as he watched you fingering yourself and if you had even one coherent thought left in your head, you’d have the decency to be embarrassed because of how intensely he was staring. “It’s not enough,” you pouted, pulling your fingers free and spreading them to look at the slick covering them, “I’m so wet for you.” “Such a dirty mouth,” he groaned, quickly grabbing his pants to fish a condom from his wallet to roll over his hard length. “Please, Johnny,” you hiccupped, winding your legs around his waist to pull him closer to you. “Sssh, princess,” he soothed you, running his hands over your torso before bending down to press tender kisses to your stomach, “I’ll take care of you.” “Please kiss me.”

Dropping his elbows next to your head to support his weight, he covered your body with his and caught your lips in a kiss much too tender for your current situation, taking his time to explore your mouth until you were perfectly pliant beneath him. “Tell me if it hurts,” he whispered into the small space between you while he snaked a hand between your bodies to guide his cock to your core. When the head slipped in without much resistance, both of you let out twin moans of pleasure. Painstakingly slowly Johnny pushed inside you, centimeter by centimeter until his hips were flush to yours. “Breathe, princess,” he reminded you because you indeed had held your breath and had buried your nails in his biceps. “Shit, you’re big,” you cursed. “So I’ve been told,” Johnny chuckled and peppered your face and neck with little kisses while he slowly ground his hips so you could get used to him inside you.

“Move,” you demanded after a while.   “What’s the magic word baby?” He grinned. “Please, Johnny,” you whimpered, clenching down on him. “Once more.” “Don’t make me beg.” “But you sound so pretty when you do,” he chuckled, only barely moving his hips. “Johnny please,” you whined, trying your best to move on his cock on your own but the angle was just not working out. “Oh, you want to do the work?” “I want you to move,” you groaned, pawing at his chest.

“But I think you’d look so pretty riding my cock,” Johnny rasped and in one fluid movement, he had sat up and pulled you onto his lap. Shit, it felt like he was even deeper now. “Come on, princess.” Whining, you wound your arms around his shoulders and pulled your legs beneath you so you could lift your hips up to make his cock smoothly slide out, the friction just right before you slowly dropped back down again, earning you an appreciative groan from Johnny. “That’s right, baby,” he praised you as you slowly found a comfortable pace, swiveling your hips until the angle was just right. Tightening the grip you had on his shoulders to use it as leverage, you began riding him in earnest, impaling yourself on his cock over and over again until your head was spinning and your thighs started to burn. “Come on, doll,” Johnny grinned, catching one of your nipples between his lips. Whining, you rolled your hips faster until your thighs began shaking. “Need help?” He just grinned, his big hands holding onto your hips to help you move up and down his cock at a steadier pace. “Please Johnny,” you hiccupped, hiding your face in his neck to ground yourself, “Please fuck me.” “Am I not doing just that?” He chuckled, filthily grinding his cock inside you. “Do it right,” you panted into his skin, “Fuck me like you mean it.”

“Then get on your hands and knees for me, baby.” He didn’t have to tell you twice, it was almost comical how quickly you obeyed his command and arched your back for him. “Hmm, that’s it,” he praised you, tracing the curve of your spine with his hands until he reached the space between your shoulder blades where he gently pushed down to make you arch even further. “So good and pliant for me, just waiting to be filled.” “Please,” you just whined again, past the point of caring about how pathetic you sounded, begging for his cock. “Say it baby,” he demanded, slapping his cock against your wet folds. “Please fuck me Johnny. Please. I want your cock inside me so badly. Want you to fuck me until I can’t even remember my own name anymore. Please I need it. I-“ your frantic rambling got cut off by the surprised moan leaving your lips as he thrust into you without any warning. “Don’t hold back baby,” Johnny rasped before gripping your hips tightly to finally fuck you in earnest, the sound of skin slapping together loud in the otherwise silent room. “God, your ass looks amazing,” he moaned, burying himself in your tight heat over and over again, mesmerized by how his cock was glistening in the low light and how easily your body opened up for him, “You’re basically made to take my cock.” You could only mewl at his dirty words and fist the sheets tightly in your hands as you tried to meet his thrusts as best as you could while you felt like you got your soul fucked right out of you.

“Feels so good,” you slurred when you felt the familiar knot in your stomach ready to snap, clenching around Johnny’s cock. “God baby, if you keep clenching like that I’m gonna cum,” Johnny cursed, grabbing you by the neck to pull you up against his chest, the pace of his hips only getting faster. “Please Johnny. Want it inside,” you whined, letting him use your body how he wanted to relish in the low moans he let out. “You want me to fill you up baby?” “Want it so bad, Johnny,” you mewled. “Then cum for me. Cum on my cock and I’ll give you anything you want.” And oh god. You had never thought that the strained sound of a couple of words could be enough to actually trip you over the edge but the rasp in Johnny’s voice had you falling apart in his arms, your orgasm ripping through you so hard it had your thighs shaking. “Such a good girl,” Johnny praised you before he let out a low guttural moan and fucked into you once – then twice – before his hips came to a halt, emptying his cum inside the condom.

For a while you two just panted loudly before Johnny gently laid you back down onto the mattress, chuckling lowly when you whined at the loss of his cock. “Shit,” you giggled while he quickly got rid of the condom, throwing it in the general direction of your trashcan. So tender you could have missed it, Johnny pressed a row of kisses down your spine until he reached the swell of your ass. “Cuddle me,” you pouted, making grabby hands at him. “We’re sweaty, princess,” he laughed but gave in when you kept pouting. “I don’t care,” you whined, fitting your head beneath his, wrapping your arms and legs around his body to cling to him like a koala. “You’re cute,” he smiled, pressing his lips to your forehead.

“For how long did you know?” “Know what?” Johnny asked, clearly confused. “That I was your secret admirer.” “I didn’t.” “It was so obvious,” you groaned. “Okay maybe I got a hunch after we started that group project. But you never said anything.” “What was I supposed to say? Oh Johnny, by the way, I’m the one who has been writing you cringey love letters for like half a year already. Please go out with me?” That made Johnny laugh, the sound melodic in the quiet of your room. “I would have said yes, you know?” He spoke lowly, “I’ll miss your letters.” “What makes you think I will stop writing them?” “Because you can tell me all that stuff in person now when we go on dates.” “We’ll go on dates?” “That’s what people do when they like each other, princess,” Johnny chuckled, “And I really like you. Both as my secret admirer and my classmate.” “Oh my god stop,” you whined, hiding your hot face in his chest, feeling shy all of a sudden while Johnny was just laughing.

“I like you too,” you eventually mumbled once it had gotten quiet again. “I figured,” he teased you. “I changed my mind,” you immediately shot back, rising from where you were cuddled into his chest but every other protest died on your tongue when you saw his dreamy expression, his honey eyes finding yours and completely ignoring the fact that you were still very much naked. “Date me,” he said. “Okay,” you answered, easily meeting his lips in a sweet kiss that wouldn’t be the last one you two shared tonight.

“Hello and welcome back, that was Middle Of The Night by Monsta X, suggested to us by raibebe through our Twitter with the hashtag JonJaeLoveTalk. We’re your DJ’s John-D.” “And Jae-D on NCT Night Night. Hello again to all of our listeners. John-D.” “Yes Jae-D,” Johnny chuckled, leaning back in his chair. “Something is off today. I looked through our mail and there was no letter from your secret admirer.” “Oh really,” he feigned surprise. “Either they didn’t send anything in or our director got sick of the pining.” “I can calm you right back down Jae-D,” Johnny smiled, “Because she simply doesn’t need to send any more letters. I finally found her.” “No way. For real? And you didn’t tell me? I have to find out through our radio show? Friendship is dead,” Jaehyun sighed dramatically and you couldn’t help but chuckle. “Jae-D you know you’ll always be the number one in my heart, you know that.” At that Jaehyun let out fake gagging noises that made both friends chuckle.

“No but for real. I finally found her and asked her out. It’s going great so yeah,” Johnny shrugged, “In case you’re listening baby: I’m dropping by later and bring sushi.” “This is so domestic already,” Jaehyun sighed dramatically, “Where is my secret admirer?” “Maybe you could find love as well if you stopped acting like the textbook example of a frat boy.” “What is that even supposed to mean?”

Smiling, you leaned back on your sofa and listened to your boyfriend bickering with his best friend. Boyfriend. That sounded good even though it still felt unreal. Love Letters weren’t dead after all it seemed.

[allthatyoulove]

Butterflies and Flowers

Fred Weasley / Reader

Summary: You help a very drunk Fred Weasley to bed.

Includes: underage drinking/smoking, fluff,  suggestive/sexual situations (nothing explicit)

Words: 2.1k

A/N: This was a one shot I wrote that was requested by one of my friends :) Will probably do another one like this in the future, I really enjoyed writing it! Hope you enjoy the story! Feel free to leave any feedback and please let me know of any warnings or errors I missed! Thanks for stopping by :)

(Also: In my version of this story, the boys and girls dorms are still separated, but each person has their own room)

---

It was 3 am.

On a school night.

Everyone else had left the gryffindor common room, with our group being left with all of the confetti, plastic cups, and streamers on the floor.

The music continued to play in the back with the group around the room. Hermione and Ginny were dancing in the middle of the room, with Ron sitting on the couch and dancing along with them from there, struggling to keep his eyes open. Harry was filling up his drink again before I spotted him and stole it from him, telling him he was cut off. He drunkenly smiled at me, before he stumbled over to Ginny and started to dance with her. He always complains the next day about a hangover, so I figured I’d help him out. Especially considering it’s a Thursday.

Fred and George were in the corner, smoking. Fred was already drunk out of his mind, so I giggled upon seeing him staring at a spot on the floor. George was moving his head to the music and singing along. The party had died down a couple hours ago, but our group always liked to stay a couple more hours by ourselves.

I had a few drinks earlier with everyone, but I stopped after my 5th shot. Fred… kept going. I decided I’d save the blackouts for the weekend.

I started to walk over to Fred, him raising his head to look up at me as I was halfway. He smiled at me, opening his arms as wide as they could go. I smiled back at him, laughing at how adorable he looked.

“Having a good time, Freddie?” I said, plopping myself on the couch between him and George and setting the cup on the table. I rested my hand on his knee as he wrapped his arms around me in a side hug, pulling me into him. I brought my other hand to rest on his arm that was around me, smiling to myself.

“The best.” He whispered in my ear, putting his head against mine. Butterflies stirred in my stomach, my body heating up.

Hermione came up to us with Ron behind her, both of them red in the face.

“W’re g’nna head off. See you guys t’morrow!” She said, waving to everyone before going up the stairs to the rooms. Everyone giggled to themselves before Harry came up to us as well.

“Right, well, Ginny and I are going also. See ya” He said, taking her hand and heading up after Hermione and Ron. Ginny giggled the entire way up, trying to push Harry up the stairs.

George was the first to speak up. “Do you think they know where the girls' dormitories are?”

Fred and I laughed, choosing to not reply and let him come to a conclusion himself. A couple seconds passed before he spoke again.

“Ohhh…… ew” he faked a full body shiver before he stood up, brushing himself off and looking around to make sure he didn’t forget anything.

“I’m going to see if Angelina needs to be tucked in, you kids be safe”

I blushed and laughed, slapping his arm as he walked by. He winked at me and left, leaving Fred and I alone.

He was still resting his head on mine, with his arms around mine. The music had been turned down, which I just came to realize.

I tapped his arm that was wrapped around me, moving to get up as he let out a groan next to me and mumbled something incoherent.

“C’mon Freddie, let’s get you to bed”

He smiled up at me as I stood, his hands holding onto mine as his smile turned into a smirk.

“Try’na get me to bed, are ya?”

I laughed and blushed, pulling his arms to help him get up.

“Yes Fred, I’ve just been dying to get you to bed. Now let’s go” I said in a monotone voice.

He gave a short laugh, standing up and wrapping his arms around my neck, looking down at me. We were standing between the table and the couch, extremely close.

“Hi” he whispered to me, touching my cheek with his knuckle lightly.

“Hi” I whispered back, giving him a short smile before clearing my throat and looking down. “Can you walk?” I asked him, trying to ignore the tension between us.

I didn’t want our first kiss to be while he’s plastered, I wanted it to be something he’d be able to remember. And something he’d be aware he’s doing.

“Can walk just fine.”

I could feel him staring down at me, so I chose to instead focus on wrapping my arms around his hips and helping him anyway because I knew he was lying about being able to walk.

He let out a low chuckle and kept his arm around my shoulder as I picked up the drink I set down earlier and chugged the rest of it, throwing it near a pile of other cups.

“Woah... maybe I should be the one walking you to your room, love” He said, placing a kiss on the crown of my head. He waited a beat before talking again, “Actually, that sounds like a great idea. Can we go over to your dorm instead?”

The butterflies in my stomach came back full force, warming my face and filling my brain with the thought of Fred in my dorm room.

“What’s wrong with your dorm? Wouldn’t want to miss George sneaking in at 5 am, would you?”

“Ther’s  like.... 4 horny teenagers over there. I don’t feel like trying to sleep in the room next to them”

I laughed lightly, tightening my hold on his waist and beginning to walk towards the stairs.

To the girls dormitories.

“Yay” He said, wiggling his hips a little bit and smiling. I laughed at him, guiding him up to the first step of the spiral staircase. He held onto the railing and stumbled a bit, but had surprisingly good balance for the amount that he drank.

He reached the top of the staircase and walked down the hallway to my exact room, throwing me off a bit. He turned to wait for me to open the door with a neutral expression on his face while I looked at him confused.

“How do you know this is my dorm?”

His eyes were closed, but his eyebrows raised and he pursed his lips as he thought of an excuse.

“Umm…. I…. I jus- I guessed.”

He opened one eye to look at me as I brought my eyebrows down in thought, pursing my lips as well.

“Right.” He smiled a this-is-my-best-excuse smile at me as we stared at each other in silence for a moment.

“Fred if you don’t tell me how you know this is my dorm y’aren’t going inside, bud”

He shot his hand up to his chest, pretending to be wounded at the use of “bud”, knowing I only use that when I want him to tell me the truth about something.

He laughed to himself about the gesture as I smiled, waiting for him. He waited a second before seeing I was serious and sighing.

“Okay, fine. Y’know those… flowers? That you got the other day?”

“...The ones with the secret admirer note?”

He winced and closed his eyes in embarrassment, leaning on the threshold of my door.

“Those would be it.”

My mouth fell open as I gave a short laugh in shock, staring at him.

He opened his eyes and laughed with me, taking my hand in his in a loose, but soft hold. I used my other hand to unlock and open the door between us.

“Go on in”

He smiled at me and kissed my forehead before he stumbled into the room, looking around at the posters on the walls as I closed and locked the door behind us. I turned around and watched him gawk at the posters, occasionally pointing at one and whispering “wicked” under his breath. I smiled at him and put my hands behind my back, just admiring him.

He eventually made his way around the room, walking back towards me in the middle. He stood right in front of me, as close as we were downstairs. He looked down at me with a soft smile. He brought his hands back up to my face, holding it softly as if he were to hold any tighter I’d break.

He slowly started to lean in, looking into my eyes as my own started to flutter close, waiting for him to kiss me. I felt his lips barely touching mine before he whispered.

“Did you like the flowers?”

I opened my eyes, staring at him to see him smirking down at me. I shoved him away playfully.

“Oh piss off Weasley”

“What? I want to know!”

I tossed my keys on my nightstand, sitting on my bed and taking off my shoes.

“They’re beautiful. They’re in the bathroom, so I can look at them as I’m getting ready” I said, motioning to the door that led to the restroom. He smiled at me, walking towards me again. He didn’t speak until he stood in front of me again, making me crane my neck to be able to look at him towering over me. He started to move forward, making me instinctively move back with him. He set his hands on the bed, on either side of me, and looked at me directly as he spoke softly, his gaze darting to my lips.

“I’m glad.”

I swallowed, not closing my eyes even as he moved closer. I thought he would do the same thing again, so I followed his lips until he gently kissed me. It was so quick, I thought I had imagined it for a second.

He pulled away and studied my reaction, searching my face. I looked at his eyes before looking back at his lips and going back in, my hands going to the back of his neck.

One of his hands went to rest on my hip, the other still on the bed behind me. He leaned into the kiss, making me lean back farther as he guided me farther onto the bed. He put his legs between mine as I scooted back, slowly climbing over me and onto the bed.

I used one hand to hold me up, the other staying at the nape of his neck, the tops of my fingers in his hair.

He was a really good kisser.

He leaned further, pushing me all the way onto my back as he never broke the kiss. He was leaning on his knees, his hands holding my face. He slowly broke away as my eyes fluttered open.

“I really really like you” He whispered, stroking my cheek with his thumb softly.

I smiled at him and put my hands on top of his that were on my face.

“I like you, too” I whispered back, looking between his eyes and his lips. He suddenly huffed out in irritation, and fell on top of me with an oof.

“I’m sorry, I’d like to go further, not saying you have to- it’s up to you, of course, but I’m so drunk, and I’d like to- I’m enjoying myself, of course, but-”

I laughed at his rambling before raising his face to meet mine, moving some hair out of his face and cutting him off.

“Fred.”

He stopped talking and grinned, “Yeah sorry I’m quite nervous”

I put my hands on his face, looking him in his eyes and trying to look serious.

“We’re not in any rush. I don’t want you to feel pressured. I really like you and I like kissing you, but we can kiss all day tomorrow. When you’re sober”

His grin grew as I talked, looking at me with admiration.

“Just kiss tomorrow, eh?”

I laughed at him, pushing his face away from me playfully as I moved to sit up.

“All right, you git- how about you focus on getting into bed without passing out first”

He pretended to think before he nodded against my hands and puckered his lips as a silent asking for a kiss. I kissed him and went to pull away, but he pulled me in again and stayed there for a while longer before pulling away. He kissed my forehead and patted my thigh a couple times.

“Scoot over”

I got underneath the blankets, moving to the other side of the bed and opening the blankets for him. He rolled underneath them, groaning the entire way through. I chuckled to myself as I turned around to click the lamp off, scooting so my back was to him. He wrapped his arm around me, taking my hands into his, laying them against my chest. I gave a soft kiss to his knuckles and wiggled a little more to get comfortable, suddenly feeling something against my back.

“Fred?”

“Just ignore it. And don’t move.”

[tooktheladdedgbtq]

....and the Oscar goes to.. | Tom Holland X Male!actor reader. 

A/N: this was just something I wrote because I got inspired I guess. Happy Pride everyone!

——————————————

You couldn’t decide whether time was slipping through your fingers too quickly or if this had been the longest night you’d ever experienced.

seconds slowed to a crawl while you tried to gather yourself before it was your turn to take the stage. You were nervous. Not about being at the oscars or presenting for the first time. Not even about being nominated for your leading role in the second installment of a critically acclaimed trilogy. No, you’d been used to these sorts of things, you’d been an actor since you were a very young kid. Starting on television before film, and you even got to hold the Emmy the show had won when you had just turned a teenager.

No, you were nervous about who exactly you’d be presenting to. Of the five nominees and potential winners, only one could cause such an intensive feeling in your chest. Only one could awaken a sense of dread that battled with a feeling of intensive happiness mixed with anticipation, and it was Tom.

You’d known each other for years and had come to fall in love. You’d met as young co-stars on set and eventually grew into an inseparable friendship that progressed into something far more. Neither of you were sure when the feelings started but it felt like they’d always been there and you weren’t exactly complaining.

Your blissfulness with Tom was beautiful but short lived. After almost a year of being official you both agreed to take a break from the relationship. Unbeknownst to Tom you were just agreeing to save face and hadn’t pried for an answer out of fear of being hurt. You just accepted that this was how things were now, and took a step back.

You’d still kept in contact with him. It was hard not to. He was still your best friend. But whether it was the business of work or something a little more awkward, distance grew between you both as the multi-hour long facetime calls and text threads became once-a-week check-ins to just make sure you were alive and okay.

Time had passed, and you didn’t have a clue what you could possibly say to him now. You certainly didn’t want to ruin his special night. But you’d missed him so much and felt like you would implode at the first sign that he’d be interested in getting back together with you. But you also didn’t want to seem desperate or needy if he’d moved on. You didn’t want to slip and say those three words again in the moment.

Father time showed you no mercy as the sand in his hourglass suddenly shifted from a slow-motion drip to a flood. The seconds you’d spent daydreaming of your past with Tom and pondering about the your potential future had passed and left you with little time to gather yourself before presenting. still you shook your hands, arms, and lastly shoulders, putting all your worries aside and waited for introduction from the host.

Before long you’d been counted in to walking on stage, and heard the host over the microphone. “Ladies and Gentlemen, to present the award and introduce the nominees for Best Supporting Actor, please welcome one of this year’s nominees and one of our generation’s greatest talents: Y/F/N Y/L/N.”

The applause erupts from the audience like a revved up engine as you took center but it was nothing compared to the standing ovation you’d receive later on that night when receiving your own award for Best Actor.

You were stood promptly center staged with the towering Oscar statue reflecting onto the black stage floor beneath your feet. Your outfit was alluring and would surely be the next hot topic which is rare for male stars. You looked like a million bucks. Everyone knew it, most of all, Tom.

You smile and wave as you approach the microphone, your teeth shining a blinding white, and wait for a hush from the crowd.

You chuckle lightly as a few hoots and hollers sound out as the cheers subside.

You eye the monitor across the room and start to read, your nerves dying down as your jokes land and laughter echoes around the room.

As you finish the introduction, clips start to show behind you to accompany the names of the nominees as the cameras catch a glimpse of each of their reactions.

You couldn’t help but notice how tough the competition was as each actor was called. Steven Yuen playing a detective in a thrilling murder mystery. John David Washington in a fictional film playing the world’s first black astronaut aiding in the discovery of lovecraftian horrors. Andrew Garfield for his role as a psychotic narcissist and genius businessman. Oscar Issac acting in a sci fi space opera asking questions of existentialism.

Finally, you had to withhold your smile as you called out the last name. He had returned to his Billy Elliot roots being nominated for his role in a astonishing musical romance film. “Tom Holland.” You’d been ecstatic when he’d told you about it as you’d always recommend he tried it again since it made him so happy in his younger years.

You spot him a few rows from the stage, making eye contact with him and wondering if he was thinking about you the way you had done with him earlier. You couldn’t help but notice him squirming in his chair and fidgeting with his hands. Selfishly asking yourself if this wasn’t just about the award but about having you present it to him.

Seeing you here after what felt like an eternity apart and your reunion potentially being the greatest achievement of both your careers. Making it the greatest night of your lives, that is, if you were still together. But you were still best friends. That’s what mattered. So you push your self centered thoughts aside and shoot him a small wave that he returns with a smile and thumbs up. letting you know he was okay and that you could continue as the camera pans back to you capturing your not so hidden giddiness.

This awarded some small oos and aahs from the crowd as your relationship with him had been a wholly celebrated one. especially among your marvel peers.

You’re handed an envelope and statue as the music ends and the applause dies down and you take one final glare into the camera before beginning to open the envelope.

“....and the Oscar goes to,” you take a peek at the crowd and see some of the nominees holding hands with loved ones. others plainly

awaiting your next words with bated breath. The anticipation shone on everyone’s faces. Even those that weren’t nominated. Your not-so-hidden grin giving away the answer mere milliseconds before his name escaped your lips. “Tom Holland!”

Tom shot up with a shared expression of shock and happiness on his face. Pecking his mother on the cheek as she wipes the tears of pride from her eyes. His best mate Harrison gives him a quick embrace and a pat on the back before he moves on to shake hands with the director and smile at everyone cheering him on as he gradually moves toward the stage still completely baffled at the victory.

As he walks towards you in his pink pastel colored suit and brown leather dress shoes you can’t help but swell with an overwhelming feeling of joy having been here to share this career defining moment with him. You thought about how far you’d both come to get here and almost started tearing up remembering all you’d been through together.

He skipped up the miniature steps and blanketed you with both arms. You didn’t want it to end as you hadn’t felt it in a while. You threw your arms around his neck and he tightens his hold around your torso. Before you could even process them, your blunt thoughts spill out as whispers.

“I’m so incredibly proud of you. you deserve this and so much more.” you hear a small chuckle escape him as he responds. “I am trying not to cry y’know mate?” a wolf whistle comes from the crowd as you apologize for being so sappy and before he can tell you off for it you hand him his award and shove him off toward the microphone.

As he takes center stage you stand off to the side to watch him give his acceptance speech. He pauses and takes a second to gather himself before he starts talking straight from his heart with nothing prepared.

“Um, Wow. I really can’t believe this is really happening and I probably still won’t believe it happened tomorrow. Just.. wow.” his words were filled with that charmingly British accent you’d come to love so much.

“First I would like to thank my mother, without whom of course, I would not be here. I would like to thank the academy and everyone who worked on this movie from the producers and camera men, make-up and costumes, to our wonderful writers, composer, back up dancers and vocalists, and of course my friends, my co-star and the director Damien Chazelle.” whom he gestures to sitting in the second row. “I share this with all of you and I can’t thank you enough for awarding me with the opportunity to create something I love so much.”

He thanks the other nominees before turns towards you to end his speech. you felt your heart in your hands when you saw his big brown puppy eyes dart in your direction with an intensive glare of admiration.

“last but most importantly, I want to thank the inspiration for all of the love songs I sung in the film and the reason I decided to take the role. The person standing here on my right.”

Your jaw drops and your eyes widen when his words hit you like a speeding semi. you realize that he’d just called you his muse in so many words. the inspiration behind the love songs in the film no less. Meaning that with every lovestruck note his character sung he was reminded of you. All that time spent worrying if the distance between you two would cause him to forget about you, or if he’d maybe moved on and found somebody else. But no such thing had happened. He was relating his character’s longing in the film to his longing for you this entire time and that made your heart do a backflip.

You blush and cover your still ajar mouth with your fist whilst trying not to pay attention to the crowd who’s attention was fully focused on you.

He takes a deep sigh before continuing. “Y/N you’re not only the reason I took this role, but you’re the reason I was able to play it with such sincerity. You’ve been a unwavering beacon of support throughout my career in general but here you really gave me the inspiration for something special. He faces the audience again as the all follow his words with whispers of how adorable you both were. “from reading lines together in the middle of the night, to keeping me company when i’m on the brink of a meltdown.” It was all true and it only made you miss you relationship more and you found it difficult to hold back your tears.

“Y/N is the kind of best friend everybody needs, the kind of partner everybody deserves, and the person I’m so incredibly lucky to have known for so long. ..and I still can’t believe he never figured out the lyrics were all about him, It was kind of obvious-” the audience laughed you’re so close to swooning as he turns toward you again. “But, with all my heart, I love you, Y/N. Always will.” you feel as if you’re floating.

He shifts to the crowd one last time to say a final thank you before you both walk off stage one arm around one another’s shoulders. You have a short but sweet conversation backstage with him where reassures you that everything he said on stage was true and completely unscripted. He wants to talk more but knows your category is coming soon so he asks for a later opportunity and you agree before returning to your seat in the crowd.

The rest of the night flew by with you winning the award for best actor and receiving the biggest applause of the night. Tom joined in the standing ovation. You thanked everybody involved in making the film, the academy, and squeezed a little joke directed towards Tom that garnered a shared laugh from both him and the audience. You were the last award of the night and after the celebrations it was time to return to your place, where Tom was waiting for you. Wanting to talk about everything that had happened not just tonight but everything leading up to it. He also hoped you’d kept a spot open in your heart for him to return to.

[movie-critc21]

How AMC messed up THE WALKING DEAD when Carl died.

Carl was the best character on the show. We saw him literally grow up from a little kid to a young adult.

He was supposed to lead Rick's group once he got older and the new generation to come. The comic books and the show don't add up. because the writers are not keeping up with their own writing, how are you going to kill him off in the show but not kill him off in the comic books? Chandler even said that he didn't even know that he was going going to get killed off It was a surprise to him too when they did. Here's the link to the interviews.

https://www.denofgeek.com/tv/the-walking-dead-chandler-riggs-interview-it-sucked-having-to-leave/

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CivhXagACN8

They killed a major character that has been in most episodes and is one of the main people on the show. Now all they are doing is just showing everyone's reactions to Carl dying. Which is fine and all but the people don't wanna see half of a season of the characters reacting to his death. It loses the "wow factor" of the show.

I also think that the whole "we should all come together, and build a new world together" and the notes that Carl wrote to everyone after he died were pathetic. Don't get me wrong, it added a sentimental touch to the show. But him all of a sudden changing his thoughts on killing Negan for killing everyone he loved was a straight turn-off! let's be honest here, I didn't like the sudden change in his character. It didn't seem like Carl's character.

Killing off Carl was done without a backup plan. They should have picked another character to kill off. Personally, I chose Eugen to go, even though he's smart and his brains can come in handy for things but Chandler Riggs was better and stronger. He didn't need to be saved all the time, he knows how to hold his own up and he can fight. Eugen was just dead weight and a waste of time. He should've died instead of Glenn and Abraham. THE WALKING DEAD is no longer a survival story like it once was. It has turned into a zombie slash gore fest now, where everyone just tries to kill each other or die killing zombies.

Takeaway: AMC needs to hire new writers before this show gets canceled or just ends horribly like HBO's GAME OF THRONES did.

The show is starting to get boring, They needed Carl to be the next Rick. I believe the show lost its fear because now after Carl died everyone had split up into different groups. The original group is now split into different communities and they all just stop talking to each other. Like after Carl's death they started the new season with everyone being mad at each other. Maggie at Hilltop, Ezekiel and Carol running The Kingdom, Rick, and Michonne in charge of Alexandria, and Daryl at the sanctuary. what was needed to kill Carl off anyways? Was it to kill main characters off just to bring on new characters that are potentially going to die, or throw the season off.

I get that AMC is trying to get a certain type of reaction out of the audience. But after Carl died a lot of my friends didn't watch the rest of the show because they thought the writer's idea to kill him off was stupid. And that's where I think a lot of people are at. They stop watching the show because they are steadily killing off the main characters what's a good show without the main characters carrying it on. I mean bringing on new characters I guess spice up the show to grab more people in. However, it didn't go as they planned. It's just like when Glenn and Abraham died. I wanted to stop watching the show, but instead, I continued because I wanted to see if AMC was going to kill off more main people. Which they did down the line.

The end of the story is, that I don't AGREE with AMC's logic on Carl. But I'm not a marketing expert on how to keep the world intrigued with the show and drive their sales but I do know that half of the world is upset about that sudden death. It just didn't fit the plot.

Thank you!