#in english it would be 'drive safe' or something i believe

[naughtcracker]

sorry my hands slipped

so i roped @justraip09 into sketching my crackpot idea of the bachelors as these, uh, sexy paintings with questionable quotes that a lot of our local trucks have at the back and when she showed me harvey's i just. blacked out

[pullupinarari]

Lean your weight on me [LH]

7. We’re already defeated

Summary: a 9 chapter series where you are a famous singer, living the career of your dreams. But your chaotic schedule makes your body give in, making you lose your memory and forget (almost) everything.

Author’s note: this one hits home and it’s the most personal chapter for me. It made me cry, and I genuinely hope yall enjoy this. 🩷

wc: 3941 - English is not my first language! Feedback is always appreciated

all chapters here

Ever since your last emotional breakdown, things have changed between you and Lewis. You decided that it was better if you just started sleeping in separate rooms, and you can’t express how much better that makes you feel. You feel more independent in a way, you are learning how to deal with your nightmares by yourself, and you don’t feel the weight of constantly bothering Lewis while he is trying to rest.

And during the day, you barely speak to him anymore. You are obsessed with your phone. You spend hours reading the texts you shared with other people - even if you don’t remember who they are, you over analyze every little detail in every photo that is saved to your camera roll, and you start to trail your path back into social media.

However, Lewis feels empty. It’s hard for him to deal with your absence, even if you’re just in the room next door. You don’t want to spend time with him anymore and there’s nothing he can do - you are a grown up, he can’t take your phone from you, there’s no point in trying to do it, since you’ll search the whole house for it again, like a maniac.

With everything accumulating now, two weeks of being distant is enough to make his light disappear already, while you feel like yours is slightly coming back.

You feel a bit more confident in yourself now, and you decide to go spend a few days at your parents house, in the hopes that you will find people that you are able to recognize. And maybe the town where you grew up, might bring your childhood memories back.

Lewis knows that you are safe, of course your parents know how to take care of you. But he still feels the weight on his shoulders from not being there for you. You’re being held now, but it’s not by him. It’s not his arms, his words comforting you - and it hurts him to feel that you don’t want him by your side through all of this anymore.

He knows he needs to vent, he needs to cry, he needs to let go of all the emotions that he has been suppressing for the past three months now. So he drives to his mom’s house, feeling like a small kid again, in need of his mom’s lap and comfort.

As soon as she opens the door, she knows that he needs to be held - just by the sad, tired and empty look on his face. So Lewis feels his body being immediately engulfed in his mom’s embrace. He hugs her back, with some tears already threatening to spill from his eyes.

He tries to play it cool, like he is just there to spend some time with his mom, like it’s nothing. Lewis sits on the sofa, getting comfortable, as he notices the attentive look on his mother’s face.

“Y/N has left already?” - she asks him quietly, as a way to introduce the subject. Her mom instincts are kicking in, and she wants Lewis to open up, to feel comfortable and supported, to be vulnerable around her.

He sits in silence for a second, nodding his head. “Yeah, she left a while ago. Her dad came to pick her up” - he informs, his voice now croaking a bit while his brain is drowning in his immersive thoughts.

“What’s going through that mind of yours, son?” - he can’t fool his own mother, he would be stupid to actually believe that he could. So he just gives in, getting up from his seat on the sofa to meet his mother, lying his head on her lap, like he used to do when he was little.

“All my life, I’ve been surrounded by challenges. But I never thought that I would go through something like this, mom” - he starts saying, while his mother stays silent, listening to her baby vent, as her hands caress his scalp - a gesture that immediately makes him think of you. He loved when you would play with his hair, when you would ask him if you could braid it and give him a new updo, he loved the feeling of your nails gently running through his scalp as a way to calm him down. And now, you don’t even go near him, you don’t touch him anymore.

“These last few months have been so, so tough. Seeing Y/N so fragile and lost, she was feeling helpless while I tried my fucking hardest to hold her, to help her. I did everything I could, I swear I did. I did the best I knew. But it seems like it wasn’t enough” - some tears fall from his eyes now, and he doesn’t even bother stopping them.

“What are you talking about, Lewis?” - his mother asks, quite not understanding how badly things have changed between you two.

“I lost her, mom. I completely lost her. I have this screaming feeling in my chest, I can’t even explain what it is, but it hurts so fucking much” - his cries grow a little louder now, as his body contorts as he tries to explain his emotions, like he is physically hurting.

“She’s the love of my life. We got married, we dreamed of having babies together, and raising a family. Grow our own little family. But now, she doesn’t even wear her wedding ring anymore, she’s not the same girl I fell in love with. She definitely doesn’t love me back anymore, no matter how hard I try” - he takes a second to breathe. “I lost the most important person of my life, and as much as she is still alive, it’s like she’s not here anymore. She’s not the same person” - Lewis tries his best to put his feelings into words, but the words he is using are hurting him too.

He doesn’t mean to make it seem like it’s your fault. No one can be considered guilty here. What happened to you is definitely not your fault, but it also isn’t Lewis’. He could be selfish and talk about all the sleepless nights, either because of your nightmares or due to the crazy amount of times that he had to drive you to the hospital in the middle of the night because you weren’t feeling good. All the times that your words, your actions have ripped his heart out of his chest. All the terrible words that he had to hear you say, either about yourself or about him. The way you would act in the most unfair manner that he has ever seen, making it seem like Lewis was just a puppet in your hands.

Well, maybe he is. Because here he is now, completely destroyed, crying his eyes out on his mother’s lap, as he remembers every single day that he struggled for the past three months. And still, no matter how badly you are hurting him, how you are taking his heart into your hands and crushing it without any mercy, pretending like he’s nothing - he still doesn’t have the power in himself to turn his back to you. He has been cursing himself for the past couple of weeks, for giving in every time that you would ask him for something.

“You know, mom, I’m actually so dumb. I’m really stupid. I do everything for her, in hope that she would love me back again, waiting for her to come back to our room, you know? But she doesn’t. And still, I act like a fool, doing everything for her. You know what I did last week? I helped her come up with a piano melody for this song she wrote about the end of our marriage” - he says, actually feeling annoyed right now at his own form. He chuckles ironically while remembering the episode - feeling like the dumbest man on the planet.

His mother sighs at the state of his little boy, feeling powerless to help him solve this situation.

“Love makes us do questionable things, son” - she tries to say, before Lewis interrupts her.

“Love, yeah, what a stupid thing. Making me do everything for someone who doesn’t even care about me anymore” - he says, feeling all the accumulated anger boiling in his veins now.

It’s like all the feelings that he has been keeping inside for the last three months, are deciding now to come out, all at the same time. “I was so scared when I saw her on that hospital bed, mom. You have no idea how the thought of her being hurt, with no memory at all, destroyed me. I was shaking, I couldn’t focus on anything else that wasn’t her. And when I spent those nights in the hospital, next to her, I couldn’t even sleep. I kept waking up every five minutes, to look at her, to check on her, to see if everything was okay. And I was so scared, mom. The anxiety building on my chest was never ending, it just kept getting worse. Every time she would cry, every question she would ask. I had to pretend like everything was fine, like I was fine, but I was terrified” - the man is fully sobbing now, holding on to his mother’s embrace, the only source of comfort that he has felt in a long time.

“I had to put all my feelings to the side, like I meant nothing. I was feeling like a robot - I couldn’t feel anything, I was depriving myself from having my own emotions, and I was working at the same time that I was looking after her, and trying to compose myself so I could make it seem like it was okay, like I was doing fine too, I didn’t wanted her to worry about me.

And for the past month or so, she has been hinting how we shouldn’t be together, but I never thought much about it. I thought she was just feeling insecure so I did my best to make her feel loved, desired, and to show her how much she meant to me. I guess this is all going to end like she expected, huh” - he says, the last part sounding more to himself actually, as his hands try to dry the tears that don’t seem to stop themselves from falling.

Lewis thought there was more to your marriage, he really did. And he was hoping that all of this would come out as a proof of his love and devotion to you. But in the end, it’s like you can’t see past your own thoughts, you don’t see him anymore - and it hurts him to see how easily you forget about everything that he has done for you.

He would do it all again in a heartbeat, though. You’re his wife, for fucks sake. His heart is directed to you, as if he has no chance of being happy with someone else, once you leave him behind. You said you want to feel real, but the love you both shared was real, intense, magical. And you treated it like it was nothing.

“When we started dating, she kept talking about us getting a house near the ocean. Next to a calm, nice beach, with a view from our room, so we could see the sunset from our bed. I think it was the thing she dreamed about the most. And when we got married, the dream persisted. And she wanted us to raise our babies in that house, so she could see me surfing while her and our kids would build castles on the sand” - his own memory is killing him now, it’s all too real and too devastating at the same time for Lewis.

He hiccups as his mom shushes him lightly, her hand caressing his cheek, stained with tears. “And it’s so ironic how I went and bought the damn house, the house of our dreams next to the beach, as a surprise for our wedding birthday, just a month before her accident” - Lewis sighs, each thought in his head being worse than the other.

“She just went there once, when I showed her the keys. She was thrilled when we walked inside” - he grins softly to himself as he thinks about your bright smile, the one he loved seeing so much, the one thing that was enough to light up his entire day.

It’s been a while since he has seen your smile aiming at him, making his legs feel weak. Now, you smile at your phone, even to the mirror - growing more familiar with yourself, to everyone but him.

“Her face falls whenever she sees me, mom. It’s heartbreaking, devastating” - he tries to find the right words to describe how he feels. “I even try to hide from her when we are home. I try not to be in the kitchen when I know that she’s there, I try to stay far from the place where she is, because she makes me feel like my presence isn’t welcome near her. She makes me feel unwanted” - these last months have been a roller coaster of emotions for Lewis.

But he can’t forget the way his stomach would erupt full of butterflies when you two kissed for the first time after your accident, how his heart felt warm when you asked him to cuddle you. He can’t forget all the hope and light that he found when you clung to him, seeing him as your safe haven.

And now, you treat him like a stranger, like he means nothing to you. You ignore him, give him the cold shoulder. Everytime that you are forced to talk to him, you make it seem like you’re doing him a favour. It’s like day and night: in the beginning, Lewis was your light, you treated him like the most precious thing that you had in your life, since he was the only person you remembered. And now, you stole all the light from him, lighting yourself up and kicking him to the corner, as if he has nothing more to give you.

And he’s tired of feeling like this. He’s tired of feeling torn. He just wanted you, he wanted you to want him back just as much as he wants you. But you don’t care about him nor about his love, and after everything that he has done for you, you are still capable of stepping on his heart like this.

“I find myself silently praying at night, begging God for all this to be just a nightmare that I will, at some point, wake up from” - he confesses, his words breaking his mother’s heart more and more.

“I beg that she won’t leave me behind, that she will come back and spend the night with me again. So I could hold her the way I used to, I would feel safe in her presence again. I don’t know what I will do if she leaves my little life” - he knows it’s inevitable at this point, but the thought of losing you still wrecks him.

He needs you, he doesn’t know how to do it without you anymore. He is not the same man that he was before meeting you, and he doesn’t want to be. Lewis needs you to come closer to him again, he needs to see the fire in your eyes so he doesn’t draw in the void, so he doesn’t feel cold anymore.

He hugs his mom tighter, trying to find that source of comfort somewhere. Maybe, if he shuts his eyes close, he can pretend that he is in your arms again. But he can’t. It’s not the same.

“You chose her for a reason, Lewis” - his mom reminds him. “It’s killing me to see you like this, and I know this hurts so much right now. But we can’t even begin to imagine what’s been on her mind lately” - she tries to reason with her son.

“I have tried so hard for the last months to understand her, mom! I have heard the most heart wrenching words coming from my wife’s mouth, I have seen her do things that would never cross my mind. I guess it’s time to accept that she’s not the same person that we used to know anymore” - he sniffles quietly, letting his words sink in, feeling them lingering heavily in the air.

His mother just nods her head, totally understanding her son’s side. But her gut is still telling her to keep you in her thoughts.

“Don’t give up on her, son. Not until she recovers from all this, at least” - she appeals to his soft heart.

Lewis’ mind is a mess. A mixture of sadness with anger, pain with regret, love and disappointment. He doesn’t know what to do, and he can barely focus on the road as he drives back to his house on that night.

He feels lighter after letting it all out to his mother, but he still can’t come up with a solution to all this. So he turns on autopilot in his brain. And when he gets home, he wanders around the house, like he doesn’t know what to do, where to go.

His house is big, fancy, with everything he needs inside of it. But it feels cold and lifeless. Lewis had to learn the hard way that home is, in fact, a person, not just a set of four walls. His heart is with you wherever you go, you’re his home. You used to keep him safe and warm. You would paint his life, his days in such bright colors. And nothing grows when a house isn’t a home.

He stops at the door of the guests room where you’ve been sleeping now. He still knocks on the door, even if he knows that you’re not there. He found out how much it hurts to not have anyone, to be trapped in an uncertain and uncomforting silence, drawing in consuming feelings that he can’t escape.

He keeps walking through the corridors, remembering all the moments from the past months. He looks at his bed and immediately remembers all the cuddles, the kisses that you shared. The way you would blush when he would declare his love for you, how your eyes would shine every time he would tell you something about your marriage and your life together.

He keeps all the good memories safe in his heart, like the way you two would dance in a silly way in the kitchen, the radio playing in the background while Lewis would cook for you. Or the way you two would enjoy the sunny afternoons, playing with Roscoe in the backyard.

But when he looks at the bathroom door, he remembers all the times that he had to cry in the shower, so you wouldn’t see how much he had bottled up his emotions. He couldn’t show you how desperate he was, how tired and exhausting all of this was. Instead, he would let it all out while you were asleep or entertained with something, so he could always have a smile ready to show you.

And when he sees the piano - fuck, the damn piano. The memory of him hearing you sing so angelically about the end of your relationship still echoes in his mind. And the tears swell again in his eyes, while he asks to himself: what happened to his life? What was the turning point, when did everything become so chaotic and dark?

He can’t help but feel sorry for himself. He slips onto the bed as he lets out a loud sigh - it’s like his emotions make him feel physically sore. The entire world around him hurts, all the fears that used to live inside of his mind are now coming to life, almost as if they already have a name and a personality of their own. And they are the only thing keeping him company at night, while he tosses and turns on the bed nonstop, his new friends keeping him awake.

He grabs his phone, trying his luck as he dials your number - you didn’t said anything to him, you could have, at least, let him know when you got home.

He hears the beeping, until it reaches your voicemail. At first, he hangs up, but then he decides to try again, thinking about leaving you a voice message.

Once more, you don’t pick up his call, so he leaves a message after the beep. “Hey, Y/N, it’s Lewis. I’m sorry for calling, I don’t mean to disturb you, but I just wanted to know if you are at your parents’ house already and if everything is okay. So, please give me a call or text me when you can, or if you want to” - he hangs up, embarrassed by the way he messed up some of the words while talking, feeling like he is in primary school again, afraid to talk to the pretty girl in his class.

An hour has passed already, and you didn’t reach out to him. Not a call, not even a text. And when Lewis is absently scrolling through social media, until his eyes are burning - a mix of the light coming from his phone, tiredness and all the tears that he has cried for the past hours, he sees that you have been posting stuff on Instagram.

He rubs his eyes with his hand, trying to focus on the pictures on his phone. You posted a selfie with your parents, a picture of a pizza that you ate. “Pizza is my favorite dish!!” - you wrote in the description. “No, it’s not” - Lewis immediately thinks to himself. You used to despise pineapple on pizza and now you’re enjoying it, in the exact same way that you made a scene because you hated the cake that Grace brought you, the one that used to be your favorite.

So maybe this isn’t just a memory thing, maybe your whole self has changed. You don’t like the same things, you don’t have the same habits. And Lewis just has to realize that he doesn’t know you anymore. And the way you keep posting while ignoring his calls and messages, lets him know that you don’t want to get to know him either.

He throws his phone to the bedside table, feeling frustrated now. Why does he keep insisting on something that is clearly done? He is just trying to survive at this point, in search of something that will make him feel his heartbeat beat again.

But maybe he’s just going through the wrong path. Everytime he tries to reach you, it’s like he’s staring at the abyss - looking at himself through it. He knows that if he keeps pushing his feelings this way, there will be nothing after this. He knows this relationship will be the end of him. You abandoned him when he needed your comfort the most now, so maybe it’s time for him to try and save himself and his heart a little, hoping that it’s not too late for him, trying not to lose his faith.

With some tears escaping his eyes, he cuddles Roscoe - his mate, the one that never left his side. Lewis won’t think anymore about what he can do to make you love him again, he will just try and focus on himself, his family and friends - the people who care about him. And he tries to fall asleep, not even knowing a thing about how this trip with your family is already making your memory come back more than ever.

———

taglist: @illalwayswaitforyourlove @literallegendicon @goldenroutledge @scenesofobx @irishmanwhore @forza-charles @felicityforyou

[paradiseismine]

Finn Wolfhard Headcanons

Pairing: Finn Wolfhard x f!reader

Warnings: a bit of fluff + lots of smut (but mostly soft smut, cause Finn is a gentleman)

Love note from Nina: I’ve just started this side blog due to the recent lack of new Finn smut content on here. Basically, I decided to take matters into my own hands. Requests are open and I’ll write for all of Finn’s characters (and Finn himself, duh), except for Richie. I hope you all like it, I can also take constructive criticism quite well (English is not my first language) :) anyways:

Fluff

- Finn Wolfhard was definitely born in the wrong era: you couldn’t believe that one of gen Z’s most prominent stars would simply love to show off some old timey chivalry.

- Whenever he’s going to drive you somewhere, he always gets out of his car, walks around it and opens the car door for you. When you reach the destination of each drive, he does the same thing, but also offers his hand to help you stand up.

- If he takes you to a restaurant, he’s also going to pull up your chair so you can sit - and, for God’s sake, you’re not even touching that bill. It’s always his treat. He just wants to make his girl happy, and you must let him, of course.

- Despite fame and all it includes, Finn is not hesitant in holding your hand or having his arm around your waist in public - as long as you’re okay with it. He loves to show you off, he’s so proud to have you as his girlfriend. Everyone around you must know that.

- Being a rising star, your schedules don’t always match perfectly, so he’s bound to spend a few weeks away every once in a while to film/direct something. That being said, one of his main love languages is gift giving: he loves to bring you little presents from all his work trips - mostly small dainty jewelry, beautifully knitted sweaters and well, basically anything that made him think of you while he was away.

Smut

- Whenever he gets back from a work trip, you already know what to expect: being showered in gifts and physical touch. He missed you a lot and you must know how much he did.

- Neck kisses are a must. Finn knows the exact spot that makes your knees buckle, and he’s not afraid to use that knowledge in his favor.

- There’s usually lots of whispering in your ear about how much he missed you, how good you smell, how smooth and perfect your skin is. Your earlobes are also getting plenty of nibbles and gentle sucking. He’s all about those pretty moans he gets out of your lips.

- When it comes to taking clothes off, Finn is always subtle and delicate. His fingers lightly trace your dress’ thin straps and pull them down slowly, giving you plenty of time to stop him if you want - but you’re always as hungry for him as he is for you.

- Each little piece of newly exposed skin gets its round of kisses and gentle touching. Finn worships your body and your soul more than anything else in the world. He wants you to know how much he appreciates you, he wants to make you feel safe in his arms at all times.

- When the time comes, Finn loves to eat your pussy. He loves the smell, the taste, the texture, everything. The way you shiver under his touch, hissing and squirming, always gets him hard in a split second. His big warm hands know their way both around and inside you: the perfect speed, pressure and angle. That boy is sure to make you cum and suck off his own fingers afterwards - you taste so good he can’t get enough.

- Finn’s a gentleman, of course, so he takes the “ladies first” thing quite seriously. If you haven’t already cum at least three times, your pussy is not soaking wet and you’re not begging him to enter you, you’re not ready for him yet. He takes his sweet time driving you crazy before claiming you.

- As he lines up with your sweet entrance, he always always always looks you in the eye and asks, his voice faint with lust “may I?” As desperate as he is to get engulfed by your delicious cunt, he still finds consent to be the hottest thing ever - and so do you.

- After he gets a verbal response (‘cause I swear that boy can be such a tease if you simply moan), he usually starts off gently, letting your body adjust to both his length and girth. His dick is so thick it still needs some patience and adjusting, even after all this time you’ve been together.

- He keeps his thrusts at a slow pace until you’re satisfied. Then, and only then, he speeds up and allows himself to release. Finn absolutely loves to spill into you, filling you up with warm ropes of his cum. You’re his and only his, and somehow, he feels as if cumming inside you is a way to show you that. To show you that he owns you.

- After you two come down from your highs, it’s all cuddles and pillow talk. Finn is mostly a big spoon, but won’t mind being a little spoon if you want him to.

- In the end, all he wants is to have you in his arms as long as possible, savoring the peace and the warmth he gets from feeling your heartbeat and your body touching his. You’re everything he’s ever wanted.

[mcbride]

Daryl Dixon Rewatch S1E06 - Coming Home

it's the first ep with an English title and the last of the season. overall, i wanna say i was actually surprised how much i did enjoy watching. the complete focus on Daryl without all the background noise/storylines/characters, the way he still means what he says, but he's actually using his words and lots of sass instead of the typical nodding and grunting. good job!

but i gotta confess that if i hadn't known beforehand that Carol was going to be a part of this show, i probably wouldn't have bothered 🤷‍♀️. the fact Carol's not only back on screen, but she is such a great part of the whole vibe of the show, was actually unexpected. this show is straight up showing us Carol is the driving force in Daryl's relentless journey to get back home.

whoever tries to convince you Daryl is conflicted about where he belongs and where he wants to be is lying to you (pointing at you, Z!!). he literally spends 6 whole episodes reminding everybody he's got a home, people who love him waiting, a promise to keep, and a need to get back asap.

it doesn't mean Daryl does not form connections while on that journey. because he does - the strongest with Laurent, obviously, however, none strong enough to hold him back from his ultimate goal, which is going home to keep his promise to CAROL!

anyways, let's get to the season 1 finale:

the super!walkers fighting scene in the arena is pretty epic: from Daryl's super cool kill with the French flag to that Daryl/Quinn team up! the cherry on top being Daryl throwing that walker head at Genet. Loved IT!

Quinn eventually does help Daryl escape, and later, unfortunately, almost kills Isa, who is once again totally helpless against any kind of threat (killer nun, my ass!). in a scene eerie similar to the one in Daryl's underwater premonition a couple of eps ago, Daryl prompts Laurent to kill walker!Quinn with a "God will forgive you."

Laurent says something that sounds like it will be the whole point of Caryl's French adventure. "Sometimes you have to do horrible things, and no matter how bad you feel, if there is no other choice, God will forgive you." this feels like the key to breaking out of the cycle Carol has been stuck to since she was banished by Rick. (i'll probably post my s2 spec and theories next week!)

next, we see Daryl watching lovebirds Sylvie and Emile saying goodbye, they have to separate (i see what you did there, Z!), and reassures Sylvie that Emile will be alright before she asks him if he's ever been in love. BOY, has he ever!! Daryl's non response is quite telling. he knows what it feels like to say goodbye to the one you love without knowing if you'll ever see them again. and he's not alright, he's all the way in a whole different continent, separated by the Atlantic ffs.

we get some new insight into Daryl's origins when he and Isa share stories about their fathers. Daryl believes that his grandpa never returning home from war ruined their family for future generations and worries the cycle might repeat itself. has Daryl been reading about generational trauma? sharing this with her will bite him in the ass, later!

Isa's confession of her lie about the drawing gets absolutely no reaction from Daryl because it had zero influence on what happened next. Daryl didn't stay cause he believed in a new Messiah, he stayed because the kid was about to get in trouble, when Codron attacked his home; he stayed because it was a way of finding help getting him closer to a radio or boat to actually get him home; he stayed so he could take the kid to a place where he would be safe, and Daryl could finally leave without feeling guilty.

the great Daryl and Isa exchange looks compilation is trying too hard to show us, yes, Daryl has made a connection to these people, and is fairly content at the Nest with Laurent and the most mundane activities like peeling potatoes. they are showing us Daryl could stay here, make this his new home. why not? HE MADE A PROMISE! no matter what he could never be happy here, this is not his HOME.

Losang gives him a way out, but also tries to convince him to stay. "Sometimes, when a person leaves home, he comes to find he belongs someplace else." and it's true, if Daryl didn't know where, with whom he belonged. and it's not with Laurent and Isa.

it's really embarrassing how Isa tries to manipulate and guilt trip Daryl into staying with them using Laurent and Daryl's history. it has been like 2 months tops, and they acting like Daryl himself gave birth to Laurent, and wants to abandon his kid. bitch please, he has kids he actually raised and a wife back home!!

Daryl resents his grandpa for abandoning the family to fight in someone else’s war, and that's exactly what he would be doing if he chose to stay in France. that's what Isa will never understand - he had a whole full life with people who looked up to him, relied on him, loved him, before he even met her and Laurent. he wasn't lost. the connection he found with the people there isn't new to him, he has Judith and RJ, he has Connie and Zeke. but most importantly, he has a HOME (Carol!!!).

there's this beautiful emotional moment of Daryl quietly saying goodbye to a sleeping Laurent, and it's clear this kid means a lot to him. however, not nearly enough to make him stay. he still chooses to LEAVE. so many people trying to convince him he belongs with them, and he is still 10000000% sure he has to go back. there truly is ZERO hesitation.

i lost count how many times Daryl actually tried to leave, but it was always the kid's safety that kept him around again and again. he is so close to getting on that boat, literally fiercely fighting walkers to get to the beach, to get closer to HOME, and the same happens AGAIN. biggest FML moment for Daryl. Laurent, who is surrounded by walkers, is calling his name! FUCK ME!

and finally, we get to the highlight of this finale, Carol's badass entry. the way she's so absolutely calm with a big dude pointing a gun at her, PLEASE. she knows he's fucked around and is about to find out. no one takes Daryl's belongings and gets away with it.

"if you're lying, i won't be back." and she rides off on Daryl's bike. ICONIC. LEGENDARY. EPIC.

21 days left until the premiere of THE BOOK OF CAROL!!!!!

[tenpintsof-sundrop]

What's Coming Up In 2025?

aka a list of fanfiction WIPs I really want to complete in the new year

So I wanted to make a post of my WIPs, getting excited about things I want to work on this upcoming year. Especially because I have recently been reflecting on fics I have written and been reminded of things I want to write in the future. Please keep in mind - this list is not a schedule, and it sure as hell is not a list of promises. Just because I am posting this list does not mean it's a checklist of things that are going to get done. I anticipate that realistically, I am going to actually finish, edit, and post maybe five of the fics on this list while getting caught up and distracted by brand new ideas - and if I can finish more than that, it'll be fucking fantastic. But please know - this is not a checklist, this is just a list of my WIPs that I really love and hope to finish. (And this is just a small portion of my WIPs - I have literally over 100, probably closer to 200.)

But I really wanted to let you guys know what my mindset is going into the new year and I do want to encourage you guys to share your opinions on which fics you would like to see me spend my time on (I am considering picking four or five of these that I am most excited about to be part of a poll to see which fic will be my first fic of the year, though I think that the second part of The Jaws of Life will have to be the very first thing I post in 2025.) Anyway - if you read this list, please let me know which fic ideas you like the best! To me, there is a big difference between nagging someone to post something (which is basically just asking someone when something will be posted) vs encouraging someone about their ideas and telling them that you are excited about upcoming ideas to show your support - which, the latter is always something I enjoy.

Also please let me know if there's any fics on this list that you guys want to see a preview for!

And if you don't follow me and you're not a regular on my blog, please keep in mind that this is my main blog and my fanfiction blog is a side blog, so if you want to see any of these fics when they get posted, please follow @sundrop-writes and turn on notifications there!!

(The Rest of) The Hiatus Fics

I am a bit disappointed that I didn't get these edited and posted before the end of the year, but I did want to give myself room to explore new ideas, and I'm glad that I did. But I really, really want to get the rest of them edited and posted this year! And I would really like to write more Maze Runner fics, and I am willing to bet that I probably will during the editing process for these fics.

Some Kind Of Disaster - Gally (TMR) x Fem!Reader. Best Friends to Lovers/Lovers Reunited. Emotional Angst, Hurt and Comfort, Smut. Set during The Death Cure. You had every reason to believe Gally was dead, so when a mysterious stranger pulls off his mask and reveals himself to be the one person you had been missing so badly - you are shocked. And then you show him just how badly you had been missing him. (6,800 words est.) - PREVIEW HERE

English Blood // American Heartache - Gally (TMR) x Fem!Reader x Newt (TMR). Established Monogamous Relationship to Polyamory. (Very slight) Emotional Angst and Smut. Set post Death Cure/Safe Haven Era. Newt Lives AU. (Sequel to the above fic.) When you get to the Safe Haven, you believe that you have everything you ever wanted, everything you ever needed. So why do you have a nagging feeling that something is missing? Turns out, that 'missing’ thing was the addition of your best friend Newt to your bed, which your boyfriend Gally is more than happy to provide. (20,300 words est.)

Trouble Is - Thomas (TMR) x Fem!Reader. (Pining) Friends to Lovers. Smut/PWP. Sex Pollen. Set during The Scorch Trials. Just as the group finds safety outside of the Maze, you are separated off from everyone as the only girl, and not being able to see you slowly drives Thomas insane. Until one day, he’s locked in a room with you - but there’s nothing suspicious about that, right? (6,900 words est.) - PREVIEW HERE - FULL FIC NOW POSTED

Freak Like Me - Dom!Lydia Martin x Sub!GN!Reader. Established FWB Relationship. Smut/PWP. Set during Season 2. Jackson may have broken up with Lydia, but his loss is absolutely your gain. (2,100 words est.)

Teen Wolf Fics

This is a fandom that I had so much fun writing for this year, and I am so, so excited to write more for it in the upcoming year.

Bark Like You Want It aka The Isaac Closet Rut Fic - Sub!Isaac Lahey x Fem!Thick!Reader. Acquaintances/Friends to Lovers. Smut. Set during Season 3. You and Isaac get stuck restocking the janitor's closet together during a detention punishment, and being in tight closed space with you, being drowned in your scent accidentally sends Isaac into a rut. (8,000 words est.)

Untitled aka 'The One Where Derek Rescues You From SA' - Derek Hale x Fem!Reader. Acquaintances/Friends to Lovers. Hurt and Comfort. Set during Season 2. When Matt uses the Kanima to hold Scott, Stiles, and their parents hostage at the police station, you attempt to come to their rescue - but you end up poisoned by the beast's paralytic venom, which puts you right in the path of Matt's wrath. And seeing you threatened gives Derek a true rush of adrenaline to get the venom out of his own system in order to come to your rescue before it's too late. (9,000 words est.)

The Curse of Curves - Jackson Whittemore x Fem!Thick!Reader. Enemies Who Fuck. Smut/PWP. Hate Sex. Set around Season 1. You and Jackson have despised each other for as long as you have known each other - but when you come back from a summer abroad with a new look, he starts acting even more infuriating toward you. You hate that the only way to shut him up is with your mouth against his. (8,000 words est.)

These next two fics are ideas that me and @star-mum discussed in the comments of this fic that I absolutely cannot get out of my head now and I really wanna write them.

Untitled aka 'The One Where They Get Caught' - Isaac Lahey x Scott's (Half) Sister Fem!Reader. Friends to Friends with Benefits to Lovers (feat. Protective Older Brother Scott). Smut, Emotional Angst, Happy Ending. Secret Relationship. Set during Season 3. When Isaac moves in with you and Scott after Derek kicks him out, Scott makes sure that he knows you are off limits. You are his 'innocent' little sister and he doesn't want anyone even looking at you the wrong way. But it's not long before you and Isaac can't help the temptation and it becomes a spark - and the two of you get heated behind closed doors. Which causes a huge blow up between the two best friends when Scott finds out. (10,000 words est.)

Untitled aka 'The One Where Stiles Wears Panties' - Switch!Isaac Lahey x Stiles' Dom Girlfiend Fem!Reader x Sub!Stiles Stilinski. (Set in the same universe as Stupid For You, but not a direct sequel.) Teasing Frenemy Joins Pre-Existing Relationship. Smut/PWP. Threesome. Set during Season 3. Isaac and Stiles run late after a cross country practice and Stiles (unknowingly) strips down in front of Isaac, thinking that he's alone in the locker room, revealing a pair of lace panties under his clothes that you had him wearing because it turns you on. This leads to mockery from Isaac - which quickly turns to sexual teasing when Stiles brings up your name. Obviously, a threesome ensues. (10,000 words est.)

I would also really love to start a 'Your First Kiss With The Teen Wolf Characters' Series similar to the one I have been doing with the Titans characters. (Maybe I'll call the series 'Your First Kiss With The Pack'?) I have been having so much fun with the Titans one, and I see a lot of potential with it in other fandoms - I think a 'First Kiss' moment is so much fun to write, and it really brings me back to my roots of writing simple romance, which I really love. I'm not sure which character I would start with first - maybe I would do a poll for that, but if there's a particular character you wanna see with this prompt first, definitely let me know.

(Also, I don't have a specific idea, but I really, really want to write an Allison fic. The only idea I really have is maybe a smut fic involving knife kink. Someone please pressure me to write this. I really want to write an Allison knife kink fic!!! Allison deserves more love.)

EDIT (adding these fics)

Untitled - Sequel to Blood In The Water - Void!Stiles Stilinski x Fem!Reader. Extreme Angst, Horror, Gore. Set during Season 3. You are rudely awoken in the hospital after narrowly surviving a stabbing that Void intended to kill you. But he ensures you that now, he has a greater, grander purpose for you. (10,000 words est.) 

Untitled aka The POTSie Reader Fic - Teen Wolf Gen Fic feat. POTSie/Disabled Fem!Reader. General Humor, Drama, and Slight Body Horror. Set during Season 2, Episode 4. Scott and Stiles constantly rope you into things. It’s difficult to get into trouble when they have you to fall back on as a distraction - a weak looking girl who faints is something that authority figures never question. Stiles thinks you’re just another liability when he gets stuck in the school’s swimming pool with Derek’s 200 pound paralyzed body weighing him down and a mutant lizard circling, looking for its next kill. But it turns out, you’re going to be the one to save all their lives. 

DC Titans Fics

This is a fandom I will always write more for. This is currently the fandom I have written the most for on my AO3 and I will always come back to it, and I am really excited for these ideas!!

My first and biggest priority of this year is Part 2 of The Jaws of Life (Jason Todd x GN!Reader) - if you have read part one, thank you so much! I am so, so excited to edit and post the second part. The reason I haven't done so yet is because I wanted to give myself a relaxing holiday break and I didn't want to rush editing the second part, because it needs a lot of love and care to be as perfect as it needs to be. I am so excited about it though.

Death of An Executioner - Jason Todd x GN!Reader. Lovers Fighting. Hurt and Comfort, Extreme Angst, Happy Ending. Set during Season 3. Sequel to the above fic. You and Jason are standing on rocky ground. He feels like he owes Crane his life because the man literally brought him back from the dead, but you don't care about that - you just want to ditch Gotham and run away to chase peace somewhere else. Things get a lot more complicated when Crane realises he can use you to his advantage, and Jason finally has to go crawling back to the Titans, begging for their help. (10,000 words est.) (This will be the sequel to The Jaws of Life, ending out the story as a perfect trilogy. It is my ultimate goal to write this story sometime during 2025, finishing out the arc of the trilogy with my ideal perfect ending.)

Untitled aka 'The One Where Nightwing Fucks A Criminal' - Dick Grayson x Criminal Consult Fem!Reader. Ex Lovers Who Drive Each Other Insane (and Fuck). Smut/PWP. Set during Season 3. When Batman abandons Gotham, the Titans are faced with a brand new threat, and Barbara recommends that Dick go to Arkham to visit a convicted criminal that Bruce had been using as a consult on cases. Dick doesn't like the idea, and he downright hates it when he finds out that the person Bruce had been consulting with was you: his ex-girlfriend, someone he had been dating for a whole year before he found out that you were moonlighting as one of Gotham's most dangerous criminals. But he needs your help on this case. He didn't anticipate your cell walls being plastered with pictures of him and articles about his work the Titans. And when he goes to leave, you manage to reel him in with your words, still knowing how to crawl inside his brain and drive him mad, even after all this time apart. (5,000 words est.)

Untitled aka 'The One Where Gar Transforms For The First Time (or The First Three Times)' - Gar Logan x GN!Reader. Friends to Lovers. Emotional Angst, Hurt and Comfort, Happy Ending. Set Pre-Season 1. While bandaging you up after a fight, Gar sees a scar on your shoulder that he knows had to be from his claws, but he spirals into shock and horror when he realizes he has no memory of when it happened. This leads you into telling him the story of his very first transformation, and him truly remembering when he learned to gain control of his animal side, and more importantly - why.

Also, I really want to work more on the 'One Moment Per Episode With Dick Grayson' Series. I really want to write more of these between working on other fics. It's a lot of fun and I really want to make more progress on it!

Harry Potter Fics

Another fandom that I will always come back to. I am so excited about the ideas I have here, and even just the first idea I have on this list is sooo stuck in my head and it makes me tempted to not make a poll at all and to just write this fic lmao.

Untitled aka 'The One Where Fred is Obsessed With Your Ass' (aka Punishment Anal with Fred) - Fred Weasley x Fem!Ravenclaw!Reader. Annoyances/Enemies to 'Lovers'. Smut/PWP. One day in class, Fred chases his impulsive mischief and boldly grabs your ass - in response, you smack him with a paper that you're holding. Naturally, McGonagall doesn't see what he did, and only sees your retaliation. Being forced to apologise to the prankster makes you determined to get him caught in the act, which gets you caught in a loop of wearing short skirts in front of him and bending over around him and eventually, screaming and yelling at him when he grabs your ass and smacks it and nobody else ever catches him doing it. And the whole cat and mouse game comes to a head when you get caught in the Gryffindor common room late one night and he catches you alone, finally tired of your teasing and ready to show you a darker side of his mischievous personality. (8,000 words est.)

Liquid Lust - Fred Weasley x Fem!Ravencalw!Reader x George Weasley. Annoyances to 'Lovers'. Smut/PWP. Sex Pollen. Fred and George ask to test out a new Weasleys' Wizard Wheezes product on you, and though you are hesitant at first, you are tricked by their smooth talking and their clever tongues. You want to go back on your agreement when you find out that the product enhances pre-existing lust, and this will be apt to reveal your ripe attraction to them - but it turns out, this might be the most successful product they have ever made. (9,000 words est.)

Water Fountain - Harry Potter x Fem!Slytherin!Reader (x Draco Malfoy). Friends to 'Enemies' to 'Lovers'. Emotional Angst and Smut. Love Triangle. You and Harry used to be best friends. You tried not to make it awkward when you developed a crush on him - but your friendship crashed and burned when he made it clear that he would much rather spend time chasing after a certain gorgeous Ravenclaw than actually talking to you. Yet in the same breath, when you start dating his rival, jealousy rears its ugly head, and Harry can't keep his mouth shut - and when his anger turns toward you, the unexpected happens. (10,000 words est.)

Untitled aka 'The One Where You Accidentally Drug Ron With Sex Pollen' - Ron Weasley x Fem!Ravenclaw!Reader. Best Friends to Lovers. Smut/PWP. Sex Pollen/Lust Potion. Ron is upset that you're indoors working on a project for Slughorn's class when it's a gorgeous, sunny Saturday, and while bugging you to come outside, he accidentally adds an ingredient to your potion project - one of his bright ginger hairs. This triggers a reaction in the potion that makes the potion fumes only affect him, and sends him into a lustful haze, making him want to fuck the person he is most attracted to - which just so happens to be you. (6,000 words est.)

Untitled aka 'The One Where Ron Dates A Slytherin' - Ron Weasley x Fem!Slytherin!Reader. Acquaintances to Lovers. Fluff, Getting Together. Being a Slytherin means that you are supposed to be natural enemies with every single Gryffindor, but you can't help it if one of them truly captures your heart. The members of your house have noticed it, and when you end up getting teased for it, you are surprised when your crush comes to your rescue, leading to something more. (5,000 words est.)

I also really want to do a 'Your First Kiss With The Harry Potter Characters' Series, and I already have a draft planned out for an idea of how do to this with George - because I feel like I don't write enough for him and I feel like it would be really fun to start with him.

Eggsy Unwin/Kingsman Fics

I could rewatch these movies 10,000 times and every single time, I wanna write a fic about this man. I love him so much and this character is so fucking HOT!!! They really put porn in this series by putting such a hot man in a suit and making him fight and swear and the accent. Like damn.

Diamond In The Rough - Eggsy Unwin x Rich Heiress Fem!Reader x Roxy Morton. Strangers to 'Lovers'. Smut/PWP. Seducing Their Target. Roxy and Eggsy are sent on a mission to 'win you over' because they believe that you might have vital information that could take down your father's elite criminal empire. They are surprised to find out that you are much more than the dumb airhead party girl that the media portrays you as, and in fact, you're more than eager to hand over what they want after you get what you want. (10,000 words est.)

Heartbeat - Eggsy Unwin x Fem!Thick!Reader. Childhood Friends to Lovers. Smut/PWP. Set between the two films. You know it's so incredibly cliche - falling for your childhood best friend. But he grew up to be too fit, and the whole 'friends with benefits' thing didn't benefit you when you started falling in love with him. Too bad for you, he broke your heart when he rudely snubbed you and then disappeared for months, only to show up out of the blue wearing an expensive bespoke suit and talking about - loving you back? (10,000 words est.)

Also for the record, I do really wanna write a Merlin x Reader fic, I just don't have a solid idea for one yet (maybe him with another tech? idk)

The Walking Dead Fics

I really, really love writing for The Walking Dead, but I don't do it as often as I would like - I think it's because the show is so amazing that I am intimidated to write for something that is already so amazing and perfect. But I have so many ideas for this fandom, and I really, really wanna write more TWD fics.

Untitled aka 'The One Where The Reader Dies To Save Eugene' - Rosita Espinosa x Fem!Reader (and Platonic!GREATM x Fem!Reader.) Best Friends/Star-Crossed Lovers. Extreme Emotional Angst, Hurt No Comfort. Set during Season 5. You and Rosita were friends before the world went to shit - just barely. She saved you from your own unique apocalypse, and you haven't looked back since. If being with her means taking shit from a mouthy redhead and doing whatever it takes to protect the mullet-haired saviour of the world, you'll do it. Even if it means taking a deadly bite and having to say goodbye to your best friend. She's more than worth it. (6,000 words.)

Untitled aka 'The One Where Maggie Fucks Your and Glenn's Brains Out in Gregory's Bed' - Sub!Glenn Rhee x Sub!Fem!Reader x Dom!Maggie Rhee. Established Poly Relationship. Smut/PWP. Set during Season 6. Maggie is the unofficial leader of The Hilltop, and because Gregory has been pissing her off lately (and because her pregnancy hormones from her newly discovered pregnancy are making her equal parts irritable and extremely horny) she decides to get silent revenge on him by tying Glenn to his bed and forcing you to ride his cock with your hands tied behind his back, hoping to get you pregnant too so that your babies can grow up close in age. It's slow torture for you and Glenn, but whatever Mommy wants, she gets. (5,000 words est.) (This is completely self indulgent, but I absolutely do not fucking care.) EDIT: BREAK THE BRAKE - NOW POSTED

Untitled aka 'The One Where Rosita and Abraham Tame A Brat Together' - Dom!Rosita Espinosa x Sub!Fem!Reader x Dom!Abraham Ford. Established Poly Relationship. Smut/PWP. Set during Season 6. Rosita thinks that you need to brush up on your gun training, but you whine and complain about it the whole time - why do you need to learn how to use weapons when you have two hot, sexy, competent protectors? She's not happy with your attitude, and she rats you out to Abraham when he comes home from working on the expansion - and shit, you're in for it now. (5,000 words est.)

Untitled aka 'The One Where Glenn Spies On You Blowing Daryl' - Daryl Dixon x Fem!Reader (x Glenn Rhee). Acquiantences to Friends With Benefits. Smut/PWP. Set Pre-Season 1. Heavily inspired by this scene from the Norman Reedus film Night of the Templar. One day Daryl takes you hunting to teach you how to use his crossbow, and when Glenn goes looking for you, he comes across the two of you in the woods just in time to overhear a conversation about how you used to be a prostitute to make money (when money still meant something to world). Jokingly, Daryl asks for a 'sample', and this leads to Glenn accidentally witnessing you dropping to your knees and sucking him off. (7,000 words est.)

Untitled aka 'The One Where Daryl Gets A Boner While Saving Your Life' - Daryl Dixon x Fem!Reader. Acquaintances to Lovers. Smut/PWP. Set during Season 2. Forced Proximity. While the group is stalled on the highway and trying to make the best of it by collecting supplies from the cars, a horrifyingly large herd comes through and Daryl saves you by pulling you under a car and making sure you stay there - but this means that your body is trapped tight against his and he has no where to run to when nature takes over, meaning that you definitely feel it when his undeniable attraction for you presents itself. (9,000 words est.)

EDIT: Untitled aka The Longer Daryl Fic - Daryl Dixon x Fem!Reader. Strangers to Lovers. Emotional Angst, Hurt and Comfort, Relationship Journey, Eventual Smut. Set during S2 to S6. You and Daryl likely wouldn’t have met if not for the world crawling with dead-alive corpses, and even when you did meet - it wasn’t perfect. But somehow, the two of you became entwined, and now - you will always find your way back to him. Will be an arc in 3 Parts, will be posted in 3 long oneshots. 

Criminal Minds Fics

Now, I am putting this on the list very tentatively. If people can't behave themselves, I am very likely to take this off the list and pretend it never happened. For the record, I don't want to be known as a Criminal Minds writer. I don't want people harassing me to ONLY write for this fandom, especially if they only want me to write PWP and smut for Reid when there is so much more I want to do. CM is a piece of media that I love dearly, and I really want to re-ignite that love - especially because @nctzenkane said that I do some of my "best, most ambitious" work for this fandom, and whenever he encourages me to do something, I am way, way more likely to do it. The list of fics below are fics that I regret not getting around to writing, so... hopefully I can actually get the motivation to complete them.

Jet Pack Blues - Derek Morgan x Fem!Reader. Co-Workers to Lovers. Smut/PWP. Forced Proximity. When Derek finds out that you're planning on leaving the BAU, he's incredibly hurt, and he spends the next several hours of the jet ride that just the two of you are on trying his best to convince you to stay - first with words, and then with the power of his cock. (6,000 words est.) (One of my biggest regrets is not writing a Derek smut fic, so I feel like I really need to get this out of my system.)

Untitled aka 'The One Where JJ Fucks The Nanny Against The Counter' - Dom!MILF!JJ x Younger!Nanny!Fem!Reader. Mutual Pining/Age Gap Crush to 'Lovers'. Smut/PWP. You have been the Nanny in the Jareau-LaMontange household for a while. The kids love you, and you take joy in cooking and doing the household chores as needed. One day, JJ comes home very late and expects to find you already gone, only to see you folding laundry. You make up excuses about why you're there, but the entire tone shifts when she catches you with a pair of her panties in your pocket. She's certainly not going to make you go home now. (5,000 words est.) (Also fyi this wouldn't be a cheating fic, I want to imply that Will would be okay with it and probably do a sequel where Will joins in because we all need Puppy Eyes Will x Younger Reader x Milf JJ in our lives.)

Untitled aka 'The One Where Spencer Fucks You With His Cane' - Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader. Mutual Pining, Co-Workers to Lovers. Smut/PWP. Set during Season 5. You have been acting incredibly weird around Reid ever seen he returned to work after being shot, needing a cane to support himself while recovering from his injury. One day, he finally finds out why. (7,000 words est.) (This is a fic I talked about before that I shelved, but I just can't get it out of my head.)

And dare I say - Lessons For A Genius Lesson Three? A lot of people said that they wanted to see a 'love confession' for part three of this series, and that is really not what I wanted. I don't want this porn series to go down the typical 'love story' route. I want it to be smutty filth.

I also really, really want to write something with Serial Killer!Reader. You guys may know - I love writing horror as much as I love writing smut, and I would fucking love to write something where the Reader character is a crazed, unhinged morally corrupt character because I think it would be genuinely downright fun.

I also think it would be really fun to write another case fic where the reader is part of the team and it focuses more on the actual detective work, but I want a really good concept for it first. But idk - I don't want to be known just as a CM writer. I want more room to explore other fandoms without people nagging me down for stuff just from this fandom.

EDIT:

Untitled aka The Serial Killer Reader Fic - ‘UnSub’ Reader, Gen BAU Fic. Extreme Angst, Gore, Horror, Mystery, Drama. Set during Season 1 and Season 6 (tentatively). You are a brilliant, prestigious woman. You are talented. And there is no way that the BAU is going to catch you. Not when you’re using every single trick that the great Jason Gideon taught you. (10,000 words est (or more) - will likely be multi-part.) 

Mics Fics (Mostly Horror Movie Related)

Like I said above, I love writing horror related fics. Most of the fics on this section of the list are a combination of smut and horror, which I think is where I really, really shine. I would like to get at least one of these fics done for Halloween, because it's like four or five years running now that I have attempted to write a Halloween fic and not gotten it done on time. Maybe I should start writing my Halloween fic in like July or something this time lmao.

Untitled Cabin Fever Fic - Paul (Rider Strong) - Fem!Reader. Friends to Lovers. Smut and Gore/Horror. Set during the film. You are looking forward to a peaceful, picturesque vacation with your friends, and it turns into a dream when your good friend Paul admits to returning romantic feelings for you and the two of you have sex with the gorgeous lake and the peaceful woods as a backdrop. It could only get better from here, right? (9,000 words est.)

GMFU (Got Me Fucked Up) - Ghostface!Jade West x Fem!Reader x Ghostface!Beck Oliver. Friends to 'Lovers'. Smut/PWP. Fear Kink. Victorious Scream AU. You have been receiving harassing phone calls and generally been feeling creeped out due to the string of recent murders in town lately, so you invite your friend Beck over to stay with you so you don't have to be alone. Turns out, he invited someone else along too. (9,000 words est.) (This one is entirely self indulgent because I think that Beck and Jade would be the perfect Ghostface duo.)

In Too Deep - Nick Jones (House of Wax) x Fem!Reader. Exes to Lovers. Smut, Emotional Angst, and Horror/Gore. Hurt No Comfort. When you are invited on a trip to see a football game out of state, you end up thinking it's a big mistake when your ex is also on the trip, and he spends the entire car ride glaring at you. It seems like an even worse idea when you're stuck sharing a tent with him. But after some feelings and a cigarette are shared, you find out - the trip wasn't such a bad idea after all. (10,000 words est.)

EDIT:

Untitled aka ‘The One That Came To Me In A Dream’ - Alex Karev x Surgical Intern Fem!Reader. Strangers to Friends With Benefits to Lovers. Smut, Emotional Angst. Set during Season 3. Partway through the MAGIC intern year, you are ‘transferred’ to Seattle Grace from another hospital in another state, and nobody seems to know anything about your background. Because Bailey is your resident, her other interns are incredibly curious about where you’re from and why you’re transferring so suddenly - Alex is the only one who doesn’t seem to care, especially when the two of you start having mindless crazy animal sex with absolutely no strings attached. However, he starts to care very much when Cristina discovers a bomb in the hospital in the patient room where all of you hang out, and somehow - you know how to defuse it. (10,000 words est, or more. Will likely be a multi-part arc.) 

I also really want to do more re-posts of my older fics. I have a lot of fics that are only on AO3 that I want to be on Tumblr, and when I re-post them, I love adding a new scene or new scenes to them and polishing them up a bit. It's so much fun for me. So I might post some polls to see which older fics you guys want to see polished and re-posted!

I have a lot more WIPs than this, but these are the ones I am most excited about. So please do let me know which ones you like the best out of the ones I have mentioned in this post, and I will prioritise whichever ones you guys are most excited about!!

[sundrop-writes]

Current WIPS July 2024*

*IMPORTANT NOTE - these fics won't be posted until mid to late August at least (maybe later - the later my moving date is pushed back, the later the post date of these fics is pushed back). I am delaying editing and posting them because editing is the most difficult part for me, but I will be working on writing new fics up until my moving day. And then after moving day, I will take an official two week break to do nothing, after which I will then start editing and posting these fics.

I just finished the Virgin!Stiles fic that I was working on, so I figured I would post this list again if anybody needs a refresher or if people seeing this in tags see this and wanna follow me. I am heavily considering working on an Isaac/Reader/Erica fic next because they are two characters from the show that I feel heavily inspired by. If you want to see a preview of any of these fics that don't already have one, please let me know!!

Also, my requests for Teen Wolf and The Maze Runner are currently open, (please read my rules before requesting), so if you wanna send me requests for reactions or MLTs for those fandoms, I would really fucking love to work on those (and requests for reactions and MLTs will be posted during the hiatus because I don't have to edit them).

Heaven’s Gate - Daryl Dixon x GN!Reader. Strangers to Lovers/Lovers Reunited. Emotional Angst, Hurt and Comfort, Fluff. Set during Seasons 1-5. You and Daryl get seperated when the Prison falls, and both believe the other person to be dead. But you can't let go of the things your relationship taught you. Eventually, when you're reunited - it's like you never missed a moment apart. (17,100 words est.) - PREVIEW HERE

Untitled Daryl PWP - Daryl Dixon x Fem!Reader. Established Relationship. Set during Season 4. Daryl gets jealous, and takes it out on you. (2,300 words est.)

Some Kind Of Disaster - Gally (TMR) x Fem!Reader. Best Friends to Lovers/Lovers Reunited. Emotional Angst, Hurt and Comfort, Smut. Set during The Death Cure. You had every reason to believe Gally was dead, so when a mysterious stranger pulls off his mask and reveals himself to be the one person you had been missing so badly - you are shocked. And then you show him just how badly you had been missing him. (6,800 words est.) - PREVIEW HERE

English Blood // American Heartache - Gally (TMR) x Fem!Reader x Newt (TMR). Established Monogamous Relationship to Polyamory. (Very slight) Emotional Angst and Smut. Set post Death Cure/Safe Haven Era. Newt Lives AU. (Sequel to the above fic.) When you get to the Safe Haven, you believe that you have everything you ever wanted, everything you ever needed. So why do you have a nagging feeling that something is missing? Turns out, that 'missing' thing was the addition of your best friend Newt to your bed, which your boyfriend Gally is more than happy to provide. (20,300 words est.)

Trouble Is - Thomas (TMR) x Fem!Reader. (Pining) Friends to Lovers. Smut/PWP. Sex Pollen. Set during The Scorch Trials. Just as the group finds safety outside of the Maze, you are separated off from everyone as the only girl, and not being able to see you slowly drives Thomas insane. Until one day, he's locked in a room with you - but there's nothing suspicious about that, right? (6,900 words est.)

BRAINWASHED - Stiles Stilinski x Fem!Reader. Pining Best Friends/One-Sided Fantasies. Smut/PWP. Panty Stealing. Stiles has been in love with you for as long as he can remember, and since you both hit high school, that love has become perverted by hormones. But he can't help it. He also can't seem to help it when he steals a pair of your underwear that were seemingly laid out for him - but he can't get too caught up in the logistics when he has a hand around his cock. (6,900 words est.) - PREVIEW HERE

Stupid For You - Stiles Stilinski x Fem!Reader. Pining Best Friends to Lovers. Smut/PWP. Sequel to the above fic. Stiles still has your underwear that he stole, and he accidentally drops them in the locker room - in front of the entire lacrosse team. He lies and says that he got them from a hook-up with you, and surprisingly - you cover for him? But only on the condition that you can turn his lie into the truth. (10,200 words est.)

Blood In The Water - Void!Stiles x Fem!Reader. (Pining) Best Friends to 'Lovers'. Pure Angst. Set during Season 3 (with flashbacks to Season 1). When Void takes control, you worry about the damage that he's inevitably doing to Stiles's body. So you make a deal with him - if he lets Stiles eat, then you'll feed Void with some of your pain. But it's not cuts or broken bones that he wants from you - it's your tears.

[sarucane]

Why didn't Ed always protect Stede?

I'm a bit late to the party and only really got into OFMD with S2, so I've started watching S1 really thoroughly only recently. And I've noticed that there's this narrative in the fandom that Ed and Stede are super protective of each other, particularly Ed--but as I've gone through S1 (number redacted) times, it's been driving me nuts how much Ed doesn't protect Stede.

Sure, there's the meme we all love when Ed stands in front of the firing squad--but for most of the scene before that, he's been standing and watching Stede beg for his life. He's upset, but he doesn't intervene until it's nearly do late. And before that, Ed doesn't say or do a thing about Calico Jack treating Stede like shit--sure it's believable that he just doesn't notice the passive aggression, but not even catching the "Steve" thing? That's something that isn't even intervening, Jack could be making an honest mistake. But the thing no-protection moment that's really driven me nuts is this moment

In the scene before this, Ed and Stede have just had an incredibly emotionally intimate conversation. Ed is clearly at least half in love with Stede at this point. This is a relationship that means something important to him, this is a person he cares for deeply. And…and Izzy almost murdered Stede in front of him, because of him, and he just looked away.

But at the same time, Ed does love Stede, he does intervene to protect him from the English--at great personal risk and cost. By the end of S2 Ed's much better about this kind of thing (though I'd argue he's never as super-protective as I've seen suggested).

So what was going on here? Ed's a total softie inside, especially with Stede, so why was he like this?

And I've got a theory! Here goes:

Mr. "greatest pirate who ever lived" is, in fact, an overachieving rule-follower (cough teacher's pet cough).

Ed doesn't intervene to help Stede because Ed conforms himself to the rules set by whoever has the strongest personality in a room, or whatever "code" is being pushed on him/is easiest to follow.

I think this is part of why Ed often struggles to identify what he wants, or hold onto a firm sense of his self-identity. And I think it's a lot of why he's so attracted to Stede, and why that relationship is so important to his development: Ed is much less likely to follow the rules when he's one-on-one with someone, and spending a lot of time alone with Stede gives him much more mental space to understand what he wants.

And just like Stede is most successful when he doesn't try to follow the traditional rules of pirating, Ed is most successful--in his relationship with Stede and outside it--when he doesn't obsess over bending to the rules, and instead picks and chooses which ones to follow and which ones to discard.

I have a partly-written super-long version of this where I go episode by episode looking at how the rules theme works with Ed's character mechanics, but I'm just going to focus on the topic question here (I might get around to posting the long version, but I also might be distracted by something shiny;) )

So let's start with The Art of Fuckery and the thing that was driving me crazy.

Ed's core conflict in this episode was whether he'd going to send Stede to "doggy heaven." Why would he follow Stede to doggy heaven? Because according to Izzy, Stede is categorized as a pet, and Ed has "a policy regarding pets aboard your vessel." It's a rule. Ed has to follow it.

And Ed fully intends to follow it, right up until the kraken turns up and the rules go out the window. And then he's in a safe space with Stede, drowning in memory of the good rules he broke (don't kill people you love). But Stede rejects the idea that Ed breaking that rule makes him a bad person. He appeals, instead, to friendship. And offers his own rule: that they could pretend the murder thing never happened.

Because that's the amazing thing about Stede: he lives at the intersection of aristocratic and pirate rules (which isn't supposed to exist, and which drew Ed to him), and he makes up his own rules.

When Ed's with Stede, he can follow different rules, unlike anything he'd imagined. Can even sometimes make up his own rules. Can actually pay attention to himself, think about what he wants, what he likes and fears.

But when Ed's in a crowd, or alone with someone trying to impose something on him, he conforms. So when Izzy invokes Pirate Rules and steamrolls Ed ("no you're not doing this,") Ed lets him.

It's a character flaw, and it's a serious one...but it's also one Ed works on when he stops complaining about the treasure hunt business. And when he and Stede discuss the idea of co-captains, and arrangement that would break the rule that "a ship has only one captain."

Which Ed is able to do because he's in a safe space. Calico Jack disrupts that, and introduces a succession of games with clearly defined rules, which Ed follows one after another. And Ed has so little self-awareness, is so easily swamped by Jack's personality, that he doesn't notice how Jack's treating Stede, let alone defend him, and he bows to every hint of pressure.

And all that culminates in Ed having to make a decision: follow pirate rules, where everyone's just at "various stages of screwing each other over," or do what he wants. Go help his friend, the guy he loves.

Which just ends up with him being absorbed right back into the pirate system of rules. He tries to use this at first, faking a confession on the grounds that he's a "life is cheap sort of guy." But Izzy's outsmarted him, and Izzy invokes pirate rules again: that Ed told him the rule for a first mate was "above all loyalty to your captain."

Ed doesn't call out for the Act of Grace until the last minute. He could have done it at the trial--he didn't. This is a hard thing for him to do, because he's surrounded by rule-following pressure, from Izzy and from Chauncy. The last time he was in a situation like this, Ed just looked away and let Stede die (he thought).

But the thing about Ed is that he's "half insane." For years, he used the combo of being considered "mad" and also having Izzy around to have his cake and eat it too with rules, to be the world's greatest pirate and also hang onto his own authentic self.

As a result, Ed got good at finding loopholes. Places where you can follow the rules and break them, at the same time. Getting run through, but in a place that missed "all the important bits." Being sentenced to death, but asking for an Act of Grace.

It's a big deal when Ed steps in front of Stede like that. He's acting against pirate rules, risking being absorbed by the rules set by the English.

He does it for Stede--and that starts to set him free. After that, Ed's never just following the rules again. He actually can't, even when he tries: his going kraken at the end of S1 and start of S2 is doomed from the start and full of contradictions, starting with the fact that he's on Stede's ship, the ship with hidden passages where rule-breaking can be hidden until it's needed.

Ed struggles a lot to figure out which rules to follow ("I will abide by the guidelines"), which rules to set aside ("Can we take it slow?"), when to make up his own rules ("So we're innkeepers now."). And Stede helps him, telling him things like "This can be whatever we want it to be," and "you're not a dick, life's a dick."

I don't really have a clever conclusion to this particular meta. It's a messy thing, and individual figuring out how to their life does and does not intersect with society. This theme doesn't resolve neatly, it just stops at the end of the season, like the tension between Ed/kraken/Blackbeard.

But there's a lot of hope here, I think. When Ed acts to protect Stede, and to fight alongside him, he's not just being a protective partner. It's a learned action, the physical manifestation of a decision Ed's made about who he wants to be in the world. Rules be damned.

[dr-spectre]

So brainwashed Callie in official content is cringe. Do you feel the same about it in Fanfiction? Have there been any takes on Hypno Callie that you enjoyed?

Honestly? I don't feel the same way about it in fanfiction. There's a lot of information and different takes floating around about certain things in the franchise so I dont necessarily blame people for using the word "brainwashed" for Callie in their fanfiction. The English localisation of Splatoon has said she was brainwashed despite other languages and the original Japanese version not using the word. At least from my own knowledge. So I get why most fans would take that information and immediately believe it's true.

Plus there's more people talking about what actually happened to Callie on twitter and tumblr which is really incredible to see!!! Im so happy to see Callie being treated with more respect!!!!! It is a night and day difference compared to the treatment in 2017 to 2020.

Surprisingly enough I don't actually consume a lot of fanfiction. I can read my own writing easily but I can't read others that well and... I feel really bad about it... but I have read a bit of this one fanfiction that got Hypno Callie 99% right. I fucking forgot the name but i was recommended it by someone in the past, it had "dome" in the name? It was about DJ Octavio and the Octarian domes.

The way they explained the shades was actually really interesting and unique! It's basically shades that play catchy music and that's how Callie got hypnotised. It fits in line with DJ Octavio too as he's well... a DJ. Plus daydreaming and listening to music goes hand in hand so it has some basis in reality too. Everyone at some point has been put into a daydream state when vibing out to music.

Although I say 99% because there's this one line that Callie says, "Are these shades brainwashing me?" And it was so clunky I'm sorry LOL. And there's this implication that its also doing something further to Callie's brain but it's not that explained well, which i really dont like. Other than that, my Hypno Callie content is mainly fanart and 99% of that has been phenomenonal and powerful stuff.

However.... my biggest fucking gripe in "fan content" if you wanna call it that is... timeline videos and people going over plot details and stuff like that.

These people actually do RESEARCH and spend a lot of time analysing the story of Splatoon and trying to put the pieces together. Yet for Callie it feels like they just do a quick read through of Inkipedia and that's it because they dont give a flying fuck about her character. It drives me fucking psychotic and i cant be safe watching Splatoon videos anymore. How hard is it to say hypnotised? HOW HARD IS IT?!?!?! JUST USE THAT WORD!!! THATS ALL YOU HAVE TO DO!!! GOD DAMN!!!! DO YOU EVEN KNOW THE MEANING OF THE WORD BRAINWASHED AT ALL?!?!?!

It's really disappointing to me that this outdated timeline video is the ONLY VIDEO to say Callie was hypnotised and not "brainwashed." And that... makes me kinda pissed off.

YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE THE CHOSEN ONE!!!!

YOU TOO!!!!

I can't even watch these videos anymore man. I'm sad. I'm not even trying to send hate over to them, they put in a lot of work... except for a character I really care about....

Imagine you like a particular character and you feel really strongly about them. Now Imagine people saying wrong or yucky things about that character and treating it as fact despite you knowing "Hey something is not right here. I think there's more here than people realise." And all the most popular and well liked content is spreading that kind of information around about your favourite character. It would drive you crazy yeah? I'm sure everyone has that one character in every fanbase.

Anyways, thanks for the ask! Sorry if it was long... I tend to ramble about Hypno Callie LOL! (Autism)

[aboutcustardcreams]

i’m actually dying to see more diane stories so could you do something fluffy? like comforting. I would love that!!

I sincerely hope you like it 💕

Safe heaven

You've been avoiding her calls for a while now, not intentionally of course, you're just swimming with thoughts. Frantically pacing back and forth, Diane dials your number for the umpteenth time. Once again, it goes unanswered, her screen turning black. "Come on, don't do this," she runs a shaky hand through her hair, trying to put an order to her thoughts.

Then your favorite place, the ocean, comes to her mind. Whenever you're upset or feel like taking a break, you drive to the beach. That's where you are.

"Please, be there. Please," as Diane grabs her keys to rush out the door, her mind races with worst case scenarios. In a metter or seconds she is in her car.

You've recently obtained a master degree in English language and linguistics, meaning that you're next in line to be teaching in schools, high schools to be precise. That alone should be great news, however, something definitely bothers you. You only recently turned 26; Diane doesn't know that, but a part of you believes that it won't be easy for you to fit in the role, considering your students won't be much younger than you.

Listening to the waves crashing against the shore has always had the power to quiet down the turmoil inside your heart. Unfortunately for you, today the sea was as calm as a mirror— meaning that your thoughts were louder than ever. You almost regret leaving the house. In the meantime Diane's heart races at incredible speed once she stops the car and gets off. She scans the horizon, searching for any signs of you in the distance. She takes a sigh of relief when she recognizes you, a tiny dot sitting down by the shore, legs to the chest, chin on your knees.

She sighs softly, taking quick steps towards you. It takes her a bunch of seconds before she drops to her knees, right beside you. "Darling, hey," her voice trembles a bit when she calls you. You feel her hand stroking the back of your head and you turn around. You say her name in such a tired tone that the woman can't help but frown. "I've been trying to reach you. You didn't pick up any of my calls," she doesn't mean it as reproach and she makes sure you know that. However, the reality of the situation hits you hard. She exhales, attempting to smile, "I was so worried," she breathes out. You close your eyes and take in a deep breath. "Sorry, I-I'm sorry, gosh, I don't know what came over me—", you try to find a good reason to all this but truth be told there isn't one, "The sea isn't even cooperating with me today," a bitter smile tugs at your lips as you point at the still flat surface in front of you.

Diane's heart shatters at the sadness in your voice, the slight furrow of your brows. "Baby," she brushes a strand of hair from your face, to better expose your beautiful gaze. She doesn't fail to notice how you struggle to ward off the tears threatening to spill from your eyes. "I'm fine," you croak out unconvincingly. Diane lightly rolls her eyes, "Are you?", she asks softly, playing with the tips of your hair, curling it around her finger. A part of you feels pathetic for how you're acting. You're an adult, meaning that you're supposed to act like one. Your voice breaks slightly, "I'm pathetic, I'm sorry— I don't know why I'm like this."

Tears prickle at the corner of Diane's eyes, her demeanor soon shifts. If there is something she can't stand is when you treat yourself poorly like that. "Do not say that, you hear me? You're not pathetic. Something is clearly bothering you," she says, her voice devoid of any kind of hesitation. "But I shouldn't—", you sniffle and she interjects, hushing you softly. "Whatever you're feeling is valuable. It doesn't make you pathetic, but human," she insists, leaning closer to you, grazing her thumb over your cheekbone. With downcast eyes, you mutter, "But I worried you. I am a 26 years old woman and I still worry you with my childish behaviors," you pout.

Rolling her eyes, Diane affectionately strokes the tip of your nose, "Your age doesn't mean anything, sweetheart. You're my girlfriend. I will never stop feeling this way towards you. And even when there is no reason to worry, I'll still act crazy because you're not just anybody, you're my family," she confesses, making you smile in return. A blush comes to your cheeks too that Diane doesn't fail to notice. "That's incredibly corny—", you comment amusedly. She grins, "but you love it," she pokes your arm. "Amen to that", you both giggle at that. Diane is the sweetest, most caring person you've ever met in your life. A part of you often wonders who would you be without her. "Will you tell me what's going on?", she whispers before placing a gentle kiss against your forehead.

You sigh. You know you owe her an explanation. "It's just—" The waves you were supposed to see in the ocean, you see them in her eyes. "It's about what's to come."

Tears shimmer in your eyes, the sense of guilt coming back to you. Diane's heart tightens, and without a word, she moves closer and pulls you in her lap. "Can you be more specific?", she coos, her cheek rubs gently against yours. You find yourself smiling at the gesture. A smile she quickly reciprocates. You admire Diane like no other. Not only is she a wonderful girlfriend, protective and affectionate, but she is also an amazing teacher.

"I start teaching next semester," you blurt out. These words put together feel so unrealistic, you akwardly rub the back of your head. Diane's eyes open wide in slow motion, then she gasps and squeals like a child for how excited she is. She slightly pulls away to look at you in the eyes, probably to make sure you're serious. "No way— How? When did you find out?", your mouth tugs into a smile that you try to curb, touched by Diane's enthusiasm. You nibble on your bottom lip, averting her gaze for a brief moment, feeling suddenly overwhelmed all over again as you remember what happened earlier that day. "I received an email by the school principal— it looks like there is a vacancy in English linguistics and he offered me the job."

Diane's hand fly to her mouth to stifle a gasp. Her beautiful chocolate eyes well up with fresh tears. Of joy this time, and pride for what you've finally achieved.

Next thing you feel are Diane's arms securely wrapped around you, "You have no idea how proud of you I am, sweetheart. You deserve this more than you know," she pulls back only a bit to look at you in the eyes. She is weeping now. Her hands roam up and down your face and shoulders. Her happiness is contagious and you can't help but smile along with her. Her eyes shine so bright you feel silly for the worries that have been haunting your mind and weighting on your heart.

You were supposed to celebrate, throw a party, even jumping in the ocean with your clothes on would have been better than getting depressed over silly concerns. Truth is, you want to be great at this, because this is what you love doing and what you've been preparing for your whole life. And at the same time, you want to live up to everyone's expectations. Especially Diane's. It's not that you want to compare yourself to her, but a part of you feels like you're not as good as her. Diane has much more experience than you, and students love her and respect her both as teacher and person.

That's probably what worries you the most, the possibility of not being taken seriously, not only because this is new territory to you, but also due to your young age. "Thanks," you breathe out, forcing a better smile out of you. "It really means the world to me." Then, you sweep your tongue over your lips, and Diane takes that as signal of distress from you. She smiles softly at you and opens her arms for you, "Come back here, silly." You don't let her tell you twice. Soon goosebumps rise over your skin, as she start cuddling you. "You don't seem thrilled to work with me," she whispers teasingly in your ear. You let out a quiet giggle, and shake your head, "I am. I feel honored, actually."

She hums in response, holding you a little tighter, "Then, what is it?", you lift your chin to meet her eyes and wait a couple of seconds before mastering the courage to tell her what is bothering you, "Your students respect you and see you as a role model," you state. Diane frowns, without understand where this is going yet. "I can't help but wonder if they will be showing me the same respect." Her mouth falls partially agape, her heart shutters at your self doubt. You've proved her your worth countless of times. You helped her grade her students' essays and gave her precious advices regarding lesson planning. "Sweetheart, they are gonna love you," she says, without a hint of hesitation in her tone. You try to protest, but she doesn't let you.

"Listen to me. Your young age isn't an obstacle but a bridge between you and them. Your passion for what you do, the dedication you put to get where you are now will be a source of inspiration for them," with a tender smile, Diane moves your hair on your left shoulder. You hum deep in thought. Her fingertips send you a shiver through your spine, when she strokes a sweet spot behind your neck, now clear from hair. "I'll have to keep an eye on you though," you frown at that. She shrugs and grins nonchalantly when you ask her what she means, "I can easily imagine your soon to be students fall deeply for their new teacher."

A playful hum comes to your lips: the concern you've been feeling suddenly subsides. "That is never gonna happen, Diane," you can't help but chuckle at her assumptions. You honestly love this side of her, when she is jealous, protective and a little bit possessive over you. It makes you feel like you're part of something, it gives you a sense of belonging.

"Oh, trust me, I'll make sure of that," her eyes sparkle mischievously, as she leans in to place a loud kiss on your cheek. You chuckle again, "Jealous, are we?" Diane's lips curve into a playful grin, "I simply defend what's mine, sweetheart," she says in a breathed whisper. You lift your hand in mid air, your fingers meeting her face. "I'm only yours, Diane," you speak with your heart, voice laced with emotion, "God, you're all I ever wanted."

It's obvious how she makes you feel. It shows in your eyes, in the way your cheeks quickly go on flame, and in that funny feeling between your legs that tickles you every time you're close to her. Diane owns you in the broadest sense of the term. "You're my treasure," Leaning in, she brushes her lips against yours, kissing you at a gentle rhythm. When she parts her mouth, you stroke the inside with a gentle flick of your tongue. Pouring in all your love, you kiss her with such an intensity, as if it was the last time. She breathes your name in your mouth and you moan hers, clinging to her clothes as she pulls onto your hair.

When you're in need to catch your breath, you part slightly but still being in each other's bubble. "Are you really mine?", she asks, her voice barely audible. You take her hand and place it upon your heart, "Do you feel that?" you ask, with a tender smile. She nods, already feeling emotional, "Every beat of my heart is for you, and that's never gonna change." A single tear slides down Diane's cheek as you speak, as she mutters your name in disbelief. You point a finger at her jokingly. "That's all your fault. You made me a hopeless sentimental," Diane laughs heartily, when you feign a grimace, "Oh you—I absolutely love you" her nose brushes against yours as she leans close to you once again.

You're both her obsession and her cure. She can't do without you. Neither can you. Your fingers come up to her face, in the attempt to wipe those tears glistening at the corners of her eyes.

"Maybe we should soon put a ring on it," when that sentence comes to Diane's ears, she looks at you like she's seen a ghost, "W-what?", it's no secret to you that you want to get married someday, and you know that deep down Diane shares the same desire. You often fantasized about walking down the aisle together. Truth be told, you two actually started talking about it after only three weeks of dating. The topic often came out masked by a playful tone, however, both of you were always incredibly serious about it. "I'm not just saying it, Diane. And of course this is not an official proposal, because, I wouldn't do this to you like this, you deserve a proper one. I'm just—," you shrug nervously, "you know..."

Diane can't help but chuckle at that, "You're asking me, if you can actually ask me?"

A humorous giggle escapes your lips at her question. Nodding your head you say, "Pretty much, yes. Is it weird?", as response, Diane reaches out to gently caress your face, getting lost in your gaze as deep as the ocean, "That's the sweetest thing you've ever told me, and my answer is yes— it's always going to be yes," she grins and pecks the tip of your nose. With a small, nervous laugh, you stutter, "Really?" And she nods so eagerly and convincingly, you find yourself on cloud nine. "Oh, gods!" You sigh dreamily, and she arches an eyebrow at that, "I'll have the most beautiful wife in the world."

Diane lightly shakes her head, playfully nudging you, "Not at all. That would be me," she argues and when you're ready to object, she pecks your lips to keep you quiet. "And please, don't you ever doubt yourself anymore like that," she says serious again. "Cross my heart," you lift your pinkie and she lifts hers sealing the promise with a joyful smile. Then she looks at the sea, still holding you in her arms. After a moment of silence, she confesses, "Are you aware that now I'll think about it every single day until you ask me," you grin and absentmindedly stroke her arms, wrapped around you, "To await a pleasure is itself a pleasure," you mutter so seriously, you can't help and neither can Diane but to burst out laughing.

[wonderland-smile-stories]

~ Chapter 4 ~

I apologize in advance for any spelling or grammar mistakes and how poorly written this fanfic is. English is not my first language and together with my dyslexia ass things can go wrong I'm sorry.

"Mi-na." 

I let out a deep breath before turning around. I was met with some teary and shocked eyes. I walked away from the door to take a better look at them. 

"Hey," I whisper giving them a small smile. 

Before I could say something else Ji-su had pulled me into her embrace. I was frozen for a second, but quickly wrapped my arms around her. 

"I thought you were gone for good!" I felt some tears fall down my neck when she spoke. 

I let out a deep breath rubbing her back. 

"You won't get rid of me that easily." 

She let out a chuckle before pulling away smiling. 

"Noona!" Ji-su moved to the side and Yeong-su and Su-yeong came hugging me tightly. 

"Hey, guys! You two were so brave out there!" I said wrapping my arms around them. 

They both were crying hanging onto me tightly. I don't know what they have been through when I was gone, but they all looked exhausted and pale. 

"You're such an idiot." I look up seeing Eun-yu looking at me with and angry look. 

There were tears in her eyes, but I also knew that she was angry. I pulled away from the kids before walking up to her. 

"Eun-" 

Before I could finish her hand collided with my cheek. 

"Eun-yu! What the hell!" I hear Ji-su yell walking over to us. 

I grabbed Ji-su's shoulder pulling her back. 

"It's okay," I reassured her with a smile. 

Turning back to Eun-yu I saw her breathing heavily with tears in her eyes. 

"Do you want to tell me something else? Now is your chance." 

Her whole body was shaking. 

"Why are you so stupid?! Every time you do things like that you can die! You almost did! Even now just a few minutes ago you again risked your life for someone else! Don't you care about others and how they will feel when you get hurt or die?! Why are you being so selfish?!" She pushed against my shoulders, but I had a firm hold on the ground. 

"Why would you do that huh?! Don't you know you are leaving people behind who care about you?! Do you want us to be alone?!"

 One after another she pushed me, but just like before I didn't make me move. 

"How can you do that?! How can you just leave me like that huh?!" Her screams had turned into sobs and soon she collapsed against me. 

"I'm sorry," I whisper wrapping my arms around her. 

"I have nobody. You and Eun-hyuk are the only ones I have left and you would have left me both." I nodded my head knowing now that Eun-hyuk had left them for sure.

Even Hyun-su wasn't here. 

With everything that had happened in the last few minutes, I hadn't noticed that they weren't there. 

"I'm sorry." 

She pulled away quickly whipping away the tears. 

"I'm truly sorry, but I had to do it. More people would have died if I hadn't stopped Hyun-su back then. I also know that Hyun-su could not have lived with himself if he would have hurt or killed everyone." I looked at everyone hoping they understood what I was saying. 

"I don't know how long I have been out, so please tell me everything that happened after I was gone." 

I couldn't believe what they were telling me. Everything when to shit after I was gone. The building crumbling down, Hyun-su gave himself over to the soldiers, and Eun-hyuk stayed behind to protect the others. I wish I was there to stop them or to help them. Now, we are all separate or dead. 

"Now, he's taking us to a shelter where it's safe," Ji-su explained pointing at the soldier who was driving the bus. 

I wanted to laugh at the word safe. 

Nowhere is ever going to be safe. Everyone can turn at any second and those soldiers will not hesitate to kill anyone. I know that if they gonna see me they will try to kill me or send me to be experimented on. They could even hurt anyone here on the bus if they found out they were hiding me. 

No, I can't risk that. 

 Besides, I want to find Hyun-su. 

If he got captured by those soldiers then he is in danger. 

"Stop the bus," I said standing up from my seat. 

"What! Mi-na?!" I hear Eun-yu yell behind me. 

"Stop the bus I need to get off." I stood next to the soldier making him look at me before looking back at the road. 

"I can't." He simply answers. 

I grabbed the knife from his pants pocket before holding it to his throat. 

"Stop now or I'll make you." 

"Mi-na! What are you doing?!" Ji-su said from behind me. 

"You don't want to hurt the people in here, so you won't hurt me." The soldier said still not stopping.

I push the knife closer to his skin drawing some blood. 

"That's why I need to get out. You're taking them to a shelter. You know what I am, so you know there is no place for me there. I won't risk them getting hurt for knowing me." The soldier looked at me for a second time before looking back at the road so that we wouldn't crash into something. 

"You can't take them to the shelter safely, but you have to let me out first. I trust you will protect them until you reach it." Without saying anything he stopped the bus after a few seconds thinking about what I said. 

I opened the door and walked off the bus. 

"Mi-na! Wait Mi-na!" Eun-yu grabbed my arm pulling me back. 

"You can't just leave again!" 

I gently pulled my arm out of her grip. 

"I can't go with you guys. The moment they know what I am they will take me and who knows what they will do to you guys for knowing I was a special infectie." Ji-su, the soldier, and some others had also left the bus. 

"They won't know! You can't just go again?! Where even would you go? It's not safe out here not even for you! Please come with us." I shook my head. 

"I can't. You all would be in danger. Just asked him what they do to people being suspected of being infected." I said nodding my head at the soldier. 

"It doesn't matter! You're stronger than any of them. You can easily take them." Eun-yu argued back not wanting me to go. 

"I doubt I can take them down if they shoot me with their guns. I can only take so much before I pass out. I won’t die from them, but I can't keep fighting when bullets keep raining into my body." I explained hoping she would understand. 

"I'm sorry, I wish I could stay with you guys, but it's better if you go to the shelter." I explain again putting my hand on her shoulder. 

But I’m talking to Eun-yu and she won’t go down without a fight. 

"We aren't safe there! Anyone can turn any second and even if we are not infected they will kill us!  I have seen it with my own eyes. If we show a little bit of signs of turning they will kill us. Some soldiers a mental!" 

I’m happy I’m not the only one who thinks that a shelter isn’t completely safe. 

"Not all." I said looking at the soldier before looking back at her. 

"You have each other. Stay together and you will be okay." Eun-yu let out a huff still not wanting to give up. 

"Besides, I want to find Hyun-su and your brother. If Hyun-su is with those soldiers…." I trail off not wanting to think about the things they will do to him. 

Everyone would be so desperate to find a cure that they wouldn’t care what would happen to those people. 

"How are you sure that my brother hasn't turned completely?" Eun-yu asked. 

"I don't, but I also know what it is to turn and to fight it. Eun-hyuk is strong enough to do so I know it. Also if I don't see him with my own eyes I don't believe he is fully turned." I try to reassure her that Eun-hyuk is strong. 

"How are you even going to find Hyun-su? I can only imagine that the place he's at is heavily guarded. Even for someone like you, it would be difficult." Ji-su spoke up walking closer. 

"I don't know, but my best bet is those red flyers that are lying around." I said with a sigh knowing that it would be hard to find him let alone getting in there. 

“Don’t you know anything?” Ji-su asked the soldier who looked like he knew something but was debating to tell me. 

I couldn’t blame him. His working for the military who’s guarding that place with their lives to find a cure for this thing. It would be a betrayal if he would tell me knowing I’m planning on breaking in and getting someone out. 

“I…I.” He started, but I quickly stopped him. 

“It’s okay. Your loyalty lies with the military. I get why you don’t want to tell me anything. You don’t owe us anything to even help us. So it’s okay.” 

Eun-yu was ready to argue with me, but I quickly stopped her. "I'll figure something out. Don't worry about me. For now, you all need to go to the shelter and be safe there." 

I could tell she wasn’t happy, but I understood the soldier and he seemed to be a good guy who wanted to take them to safety. Heck, he even risked his life back there when the monsters attacked us. 

A selfish person would have walked away from that, but he stood his ground and fought back. 

“I hear about a place, , but I don’t know where it is or what is happening there. It’s surrounded by water that much I know. I’m not high enough in the ranks to know that much, but there were rumors about that place. Your best bet is there if you want to find the person you’re looking for.” The soldier said suddenly surprising us all. 

It was really brave of him to tell me anything. If anyone would fine out he helped a monster he could be banished or worse killed.

“Thank you.” 

He nodded his head at me before giving me a warning. “You’re going to have a hard time getting in. Let alone getting out. There is a chance they will kill you the moment they see you and if they find out what you are there is a chance you will be locked up as well.” 

I know the risks. 

But I also know that I have to try to get Hyun-su out. There is no doubt in me that he wouldn’t do the same for me if I was captured. 

“I know. Please take them to safety for me.” Again the soldier nodded his head. 

My eyes scanned everyone and it was hard not to cry. This could be the last time I see them. I already cheated dead once I don’t know if I can do that again. Giving them one last smile I was about to turn around to go, but Eun-yu grabbed my arm again. 

"Eun-yu plea-" Before I could finish my sentence she pulled me in a hug. 

A small smile came on my face before I hugged her back. 

"Be careful." She whispers before pulling away. I nodded my head. 

"I will and please don't do something stupid again like you just did. Don't let the other's deaths go in vain." She nodded her head. 

I look at the others giving them all a smile. 

"I know that you all can survive. We all have been through shit, but we managed to survive. So don't give up now." I have no idea if I ever am going to see any of them again, but I hope they all will survive. 

"We will. Just take care of yourself and be careful." Ji-su said with a smile, making me nod. 

With tears in her eyes, she quickly pulls me in a hug. 

“You better come back when you find those two. You still have to listen to that song I made.” 

Hugging her back tightly I let out a little laugh. 

“I will.” I promised pulling away trying not to cry. 

I didn’t want to say goodbye to them. 

It felt just as awful like when I had to say goodbye to Miles and Ace, but I know that I don't have any other choice. 

Previous Chapter ~ Next Chapter

———————————————————

[thelreads]

I am back to ramble about Chloe again 🥰 Tumblr eater of messages YOU SHALL NOT DEFEAT ME

Anyway so I was gonna say what really got to me about Yuri and Chloe is that Yuri actually apologised to her. I was stunned. I don’t think he’s ever (sincerely) apologised to anyone but Yor. The fact that he cares enough about her—about her opinion of him— left me absolutely gobsmacked.

Like, them bickering in the car about calling each other by name and who’s the senior? That was adorable. It was super shippy. But it also felt kind of one-sided because you could tell how close Chloe felt to Yuri, but you weren’t sure if that was reciprocated. Though, to be fair, it’s pretty hard get a read on how Yuri feels about other people in general, since he pretends to be apathetic about everyone besides Yor on principle (more on that later).

But when she slapped him and called him out? I was expecting an explosion. I was expecting self-righteousness and stubbornness and screaming. I was NOT expecting to see Yuri Briar, of all people, genuinely apologise while looking like a remorseful puppy. That shook me to my core.

Because the fact that Yuri actually cared enough to apologise shows that he actually likes Chloe. He genuinely cares about her opinion of him. And not only did he apologise with real remorse - he even asked her for advice on what he should do like??? For all his snarking and quibbling, he genuinely respects her. He cares about her opinion. Like. This is Mr Yor-taku over here. This behaviour from him is so genuinely mind blowing.

Because, again, Yuri pretends to be apathetic about everyone besides Yor on principle. That whole ‘I can’t let her see me cavorting with you’ line isnt a sis-con joke. That is genuinely the way Yuri thinks. I think Yuri believes that he owes Yor his life. Life, his entire life. He operates on the belief that giving any of his time/interest/energy to anyone other than Yor would be a betrayal to her and everything she sacrificed for him. In his head, she devoted herself to him when they were kids, so now he has to devote himself to her. It’s as if the only way he can honour her sacrifice is by making one of his own. ‘This is the woman who put aside her own happiness to raise me!’ That’s why, for Yuri, finding his own happiness is completely out of the question.

Of course, it’s a messed up way to think, but it perfectly illustrates Yuri’s character, because, like everyone in SpyxFamily, Yuri is a liar. He can pretend to have Yor-vision all he likes. He can snarl and scowl and deny it all he wants. But the truth is, whether he likes it or not, Yuri does care about people besides Yor.

He looked genuinely worried when he heard Anya got kidnapped, but immediately tried to rationalise it away by saying he’d be happy if she was out of the way. He immediately focused on how Yor would feel if something happened to her, but used that to justify him meddling to keep her safe. And what happened when the adrenaline wore off? Did Yuri croon about how taking a bullet was nothing for his sister’s happiness? Nope. In his pain, he blurted out the truth: I can’t believe I took a bullet for chihuahua girl!

Similarly, for all his hatred of Loid, he should have been driving them to the court house the minute Yor said she had gripes. Instead, he acted like a child taking his mother’s side in her first fight with his stepdad. He actually told Loid to apologise! Even later, when Yor couldn’t say she loved him, that should have been Yuri’s cue to get rid of Loid Forger once and for all. And yet. Even though it’s so easy for the SSS to make up charges and arrest citizens, Yuri has never and will never do so for his brother-in-law, who he supposedly wants gone asap.

(Also ch 89 has a slight mistranslation - the English version makes it out as if Yuri is planning to make up some reason to get Loid arrested. This is not the case. He actually thinks ‘But wait — let’s say he actually was guilty of something and I got him arrested. Wouldn’t that still end up making my sister sad…?!’ That moment of shock on his face was supposed to be a moment of realisation - that he shouldn’t want Loid to be guilty of being twilight or an adulterer or anything else, because Yor cares about him, and him getting arrested would upset her. Of course the next panel he immediately dismisses this and says nah there’s no way my sister would be sad over that. Again, Yuri is lying to himself. And he knows damn well he’s lying to himself, because he still won’t touch Loid with any charges, real or false.)

At the end of the day, for Chloe to even momentarily get past Yuri’s psychological Yor-barrier is HUGE. That he apologise to her is HUGE. That apology wasn’t for Yor’s benefit. It was solely for Chloe. Also, amusingly enough, in that panel when she calls him a self-serving hypocrite and he gasps - the suffix that is used is ガーン which is the suffix equivalent of 😨 and is usually used for Twilight when he’s dismayed because he thinks Yor hates him. Again, it wasn’t Yor calling him a hypocrite there. It was Chloe. And yet, it got to him. Mr Yor-taku. Enough for him to apologise.

All in all, I am expecting great things from Chloe. She is literally Yuri’s only hope for rehabilitation at this point. For all that Yuri pushes everyone away and refuses to ‘officially’ let himself care about them, he has clearly slipped up with her and I cannot wait to see the continuation ☺️

As a final note I will add - I think Chloe’s analysis of self-serving hypocrisy is spot on, and to truly cover all aspects of Yuri being a lying liar, it should be noted that Yuri did not have to dedicate his life to Yor - he chose to. And I think there’s another self-serving aspect to his sacrifice, besides alleviating his guilt - at the end of the day, it is much safer to devote yourself to your one remaining family member, rather than to risk loving and losing anyone else. Yuri may keep everyone at a distance while claiming it’s to honour his sister’s sacrifice, but I think the truth is that he’s just too afraid to open his heart to anyone else.

And so Chloe has both my blessings and ✨highest expectations✨ to get my boy his own life and happiness, even if she has to drag him there kicking and screaming.

oh hell yeah, thank the heavens you managed to get this post through. Tumblr is always a pain in the ass when it comes to long asks, or sending more than one ask in short of span of time.

Functional website.

Anyway, I liked that. Yeah, Chloe is his friend, he trusts and respects her a lot, but he'll never admit to it since he also is a FUCKING TSUNDERE. Seems that every character in the story refuses to be honest about their feelings for others. Twilight can't admit he loves his family, and also can't admit that he sees Franky as his best friend. Franky, likewise, can't admit that Twilight is his best Friend. Yor can't admit that she wants to bang Twilight until she pulverizes all bones on his body. Melinda can't admit her own love and hatred for her kid. Damian can't admit he likes Anya, and Anya refuses to even let the thought she might like Damian cross her mind.

like, jesus christ Endo

And yeah, I also have high hopes for her. Honestly, she feels like the wacky and nonsensical comedic sidekick to Yuri, which himself is already the wacky and nonsensical comedic butt of the the story, but she shows that when push comes to shove she has her head on the right place and she's not afraid to put Yuri's ass back into it's place.

just hope she not revealed to be an agent from Garden put there to keep an eye on him, since the group seems to want to keep Yor right where she is.

[writershapeholeonthedoor]

I Wanna Believe (that we're a masterpiece)

Pairing: Carol Danvers/Natasha Romanoff

Summary: Natasha seems to be unable to take care of herself, so Carol decides she will the one to do that

Disclaimer: English is not my first language

Read on AO3

The first time it happens, Carol had a small smile on her face while one of her hands held a piece of cloth to Natasha's shoulder, using the other hand to apply pressure from the other side. Natasha hadn't been shot, but one of the guys they were fighting against had pushed her through a window and, well, she got a small little cut.

"It's not small," Clint had argued after everyone joined the group when the fight was over. "It's pretty nasty, actually."

"I've had worse," was her reply and, well, she wasn’t lying.

Even so, Clint insisted that she put something to stop the bleeding and Steve had betrayed her when he said she looked a bit pale, and that's how Natasha found herself sitting at the back of a van while the team got back to the compound. Clint was driving and, usually, they would be the only ones there because everyone else could quite literally fly around, but Captain Marvel said she would ride with them to make sure Natasha would actually take care of her injury.

The redhead spent the first minute or two just staring at the other woman, wondering why she was there - not just the van, but Earth as well since she wasn’t known for spending too much time on her home planet before leaving again - but her resolve faltered when Clint's reckless driving made an appearance, making her jump when the car hit a hole. She hissed in pain and that's when Carol came forward to take a look at her shoulder. She had to slap Natasha's hand away, though with an amused grin, before deciding she was more fitting to the job of holding the cloth in place.

"It's not half as bad as you're all making it seem," Natasha complained after a moment, although her voice didn’t have the bite to it that she was aiming for.

Carol looked up, all bright brown eyes and a lopsided smile, and her hot breath hit the side of Natasha's face without her noticing it. The Russian woman did, though, and she had to make a conscious effort to keep her eyes locked into brown ones.

"Yes, we all know you will survive," Carol teased her. "But I also guess you don't have blood bags spreading around to use if you keep bleeding like this."

"I'm not bleeding that much," Natasha mumbled, only slightly irritated.

"Well, you're welcome."

Carol shrugged so nonchalantly that Natasha couldn’t do anything else other than laugh at the gesture. The blonde seemed content with the reaction she got and her eyes shined like the stars that the woman flew by every day in space. Her smile also widened and she looked smug for a second before Clint hit another hole, making them both jump.

"Guess you're right," Carol said, "you're in more danger of dying in a car crash in the next few minutes than from this wound."

Natasha didn’t reply, mostly because she knew she should actually fear for her life there. That's why she didn’t let Clint drive.

[...]

Alcohol, cotton and antiseptic were involved the second time. They were safe from Clint's driving, but Carol had followed Natasha to the bathroom when their post-fight meeting at the compound ended. They had won, once again, however not without throwing a few punches and being at the other end as well. Carol frowned when she saw Natasha entering the room with Captain America by her side, one side of her face already turning a sickening shade of yellow and purple. Her bottom lip was split, swollen as well, as half of her face was, but the woman didn’t seem even a little disturbed by that.

She endured all the talk, the jokes the boys liked to throw around, and then even helped Tony to set a few things on a computer before she walked out to the hall. That's when Carol followed her, making sure she would do something with her injuries. Natasha entered the hallway bathroom seconds later and, before she could close the door behind her, Carol stepped inside behind her.

"The hell?!"

"Let me take a look at it," Carol said before the redhead could actually start screaming at her.

Natasha, on the other hand, only scoffed as if the idea was too ridiculous to be considered. "It's just a bruise. It will heal just fine."

"Your lip is bleeding," the other woman pointed out without trying to hide her worry.

"Yes, that's what happens when someone punches you in the face," Natasha dismissed with an eye roll. "I'm sure you know."

"I know it can happen, yes," Carol answered slowly, "although I don't remember the feeling of it. It must be hurting, though."

Natasha didn’t answer her right away as she was expecting though. Carol was kind of waiting for the woman to snap again, but Natasha only looked at her with what seemed to be a curious expression on her face before she rolled her eyes again and turned to open a cabinet. She pulled a first aid kit from there and, making it look to be the hardest thing she ever did in her life, handed it to Carol, who just smiled happily at her. Moments later, the blonde was cleaning the blood from her chin with a wet cotton ball while holding her face with the other hand.

While her eyes focused on the injury, Natasha's eyes paid close attention to the superhero. To the crinkle between her brows while she was concentrating on the task in her hands, to the stray blonde hair falling down her face, to the strong shoulders beneath the red and blue suit, to the hands that were callous but handled her so gently. Natasha had a hard time thinking after that and, before she noticed it, Carol was pulling away from her with a smile.

"There!" She declared happily. "I think putting some ice on it will help with the swelling, so you should do that."

"I'm fine," Natasha said and immediately looked away when she noticed that her voice was just above a whisper. "Thanks."

"No problem. Just try to keep yourself in one piece next time, yes?"

[...]

She did try, Natasha could argue, but she was also working for the craziest team in the world and they deal with a lot of shitty situations.

So, of course, the third time happened not long after the day in the bathroom.

This time, she got a concussion after an explosion that threw her back several feet. She got up to her feet pretty fast and made sure she took down some of the bad guys before she could get too dizzy to do so. Steve made sure the fight was over while Natasha tried to hide the fact that the world around her was spinning, but she wasn’t so lucky when Carol approached her, already putting a hand on her shoulder.

"You okay?"

Her voice sounded distant, so very far away that it was almost like Natasha had her head underwater. The redhead tried to focus on the face in front of her - the worried eyes and the lips pursed in a fine line - but there were suddenly two Carols in front of her and it was hard to keep standing. Even so, she wasn’t about to say that out loud.

"Sure." She tried to push herself away, to put some space between them and to prove she was fine, but her body wobbled before she could get too far and, suddenly both of Carol's hands were holding her arms to keep her standing. "Do you work here now?" Natasha asked, trying to change the subject. "Like… all the time? Thought your office was, like, up space."

"The amount of times you said 'like' is all the answer I need, really," Carol said with just a bit of humor. "You need to sit down."

"No, I'm fine."

Which would've been a lie if she ever managed to finish the sentence, but, just as she opened her mouth, she felt the bile at the back of her throat. Carol noticed the way her face twisted and got a yellowish color, which gave her enough time to get out of the way when Natasha leaned forward and let all the contents of her stomach meet the floor.

"Okay," Carol drew the word slowly while her hand kept touching the back of the other woman, making sure she wouldn’t fall face-first on the floor. "Guess someone needs to lay down."

"I don't," Natasha tried to insist, but it only made Carol roll her eyes.

Natasha wasn't able to notice things around her or register the conversations that followed. If she did, she would have argued when Carol told Bruce that she needed medical assistance and she certainly wouldn’t have agreed when the superhero said it would be safer if Carol took her back to the compound. Natasha wasn't okay though and all she could do was grab Carol's arm to stop her from picking her up from the floor.

"I can walk," Natasha said.

Carol hesitated for a moment, looking at the woman up and down twice to be sure. "I don't think you can."

The redhead scoffed. "Watch me."

She took one step forward and then suddenly the world around her began to spin in a way that almost made her puke again. She didn't. Instead, the spinning came to an end when everything went black as she fell.

Natasha regained her consciousness slowly. She could hear a steady beep from a machine that she knew was measuring her heartbeats, she could feel a very uncomfortable bed she was lying on, she could smell the antiseptic. She knew she was in a hospital bed before she even opened her eyes, although she instantly regretted it when the white light above her made her eyes burn and her head hurt.

"Yeah, not very wise to do it now."

The voice came from her right side and Natasha turned her head to that direction before she could stop herself, glaring at the woman sitting beside her. Carol had her legs crossed on a chair, flipping through a magazine, and looking very mundane wearing some normal clothes for once. Jeans and a band t-shirt that looked old and worn out. Even if her head was hurting and her eyes teared up because of the brightness, Natasha still forced herself to look at Carol because… well, she was there and she was a sight that couldn’t be missed.

The blonde flipped the pages twice more before she stole a glance at Natasha. "Try not to move your head so much. It will make you dizzy."

Natasha tried to speak then, but her mouth felt dry as if there were a dozen cotton balls inside it. She closed her eyes, trying to focus on a single movement to wet her lips, although she knew it was useless. When she opened her eyes again, Carol’s attention had gone back to the magazine and Natasha didn’t have another option other than to look at her profile for a while. Her tense jaws, her frowned brows, the lack of her usual smile.

"You mad," she muttered in her raspy voice that made her throat burn and her lips crack a bit.

It wasn’t a question. She knew Carol was mad. It was pretty obvious. Even so, she saw the other woman sigh and close the magazine with a harsh movement before her hand raised to pinch the bridge of her nose as her eyes closed. It lasted just a short moment, but she seemed tired when she looked at Natasha.

"I should call for the doctor to check on you. I kinda forgot how this hospital thing works."

"Why?" Natasha asked.

"'Cus I can't get hurt, remember?" Was Carol's answer, but she was already at the door by the time she said it and Natasha didn’t have the chance to clarify she was asking why Carol was there.

The doctor entered the room alone a few minutes later, smiling politely, and Natasha had to endure several tests that the man wanted to make. He told her she had been out for only a few hours, mostly due to the sedatives, and that it was normal for her not to remember entering the hospital or anything like it. He also explained she had a bad concussion and a wound at the back of her head that, luckily, didn’t need stitches.

"It was a bad motorcycle accident," he commented after making Natasha follow the light at the end of his pen with her eyes for a while. "But you will be fine."

It only took her a moment to realize that was the cover story Carol had come up with since they couldn’t exactly say Natasha had survived a bomb explosion that some crazy dude used to try to stop the Avengers from getting him. So, a motorcycle accident it is. Well, Natasha was glad that most people would fall for any lie without too much questioning.

"Your wife had been very worried about you."

Natasha's eyes met his face so fast that her head spun again. "What?"

The man, who was writing down a few things on her chart, used his pen to point at the door that Carol left before. "Your wife. She had been pacing around the room and driving our nurses crazy with her questions." He didn't seem angry about it, though. In fact, he had a soft smile when he kept writing. "She was pretty scared when she entered the ER with you, from what they told me. Your head was bleeding pretty badly and she had to carry you with something to try to stop the blood."

"She's not my wife," was all Natasha could say to all of that.

Which, of course, earned her a stare from the man. He considered her words for a second, then he shrugged and started putting the chart back in its place at the foot of her bed. "Well, put a ring on it, then. And try not to do any tricks with a bike again, okay?"

He left and Natasha was only alone for a moment before the door opened again and Carol entered the room. "They want to hold you for the night to make sure you're okay."

"No," Natasha quickly replied.

Carol sighed. "I knew you would say that, so I told them we would like to leave. I suppose they're just doing some paperwork for that now."

Natasha felt her body relax a bit knowing she wouldn’t have to stay there for much longer, although it didn't last long when she noticed that Carol hadn’t moved far from the door yet. "What?"

"I'm not mad," the blonde said eventually. "You got me pretty worried."

"Sorry," Natasha mumbled.

"I asked you to stay in one piece." Natasha arched one eyebrow that said way more than her words ever could. Noticing the gesture, Carol sighed again. "I know you have to fight the bad guys and all, but… that's the third time I had to stop you from bleeding to death."

"I was hardly bleeding the other times," Natasha quickly argued.

"Well, this time you were," Carol interrupted her just as fast, her voice raising without her noticing it. She did once the last word was out and the blonde took a deep breath to regain control over her emotions again. "Just… rest for a while longer until they come to discharge you."

"Why do you care?" Natasha had asked when they were walking out of the hospital almost two hours later. She saw Clint waiting for them at the other side of the parking lot, but she didn’t know what possessed her to ask the question.

"Because I care about you," Carol replied calmly.

"Why?" Natasha pressed.

The blonde turned to face her with such serenity written all over her expression that Natasha couldn’t come up with any reply after what she said. "Is it too hard to believe that I just do?"

Natasha didn’t bother saying that no one else in her life had ever cared.

Somehow, she knew that Carol was aware of that.

[...]

The fourth time was a bit ridiculous, if Natasha was the one to say it.

She was cooking, something that wasn’t normal but also didn’t mean the world was ending.

Well, it could be ending because Tony, Steve and Bruce left a few hours prior to some mission, however, they said no one else needed to go with them. Clint had taken the opportunity to go spend some time with his family, which meant that Natasha would be the only one in the compound for the night. That’s what she thought when she walked to the kitchen to open the fridge and see what they had that could serve as a quick dinner. She was looking at a carton of milk, trying to find out if it had expired already or not, when she noticed someone was approaching her.

“Boo!”

Natasha didn’t even blink when Carol jumped inside the kitchen with her arms raised and a large smile that fitted her joyful little prank very well. The blonde froze for a second when she got no reaction from the other woman, but her smile didn’t falter when she walked closer to Natasha.

“I thought I could succeed with that one,” she commented when she leaned against the counter beside the fridge.

Natasha glanced at her for a second. “I am a trained spy, you know?”

Carol shrugged and reached out to grab an apple from the fruit bowl. “What are you doing?”

“Dinner,” the redhead replied as she watched the superhero bite down at the fruit.

It shouldn’t be a sexual gesture at all, but Natasha had to look away when she realized some dirty thoughts trying to break free. Carol was gorgeous, there was no denying that. Actually, anyone with functional eyes would be able to agree that she was beautiful. She was taller than Natasha, her arms filled her suit very well and she just had this energy on her that was hard to miss. She wasn’t wearing her suit that night, though, choosing a sleeveless tank top and loose sweat pants, with her hair pulled in a ponytail and bare feet touching the floor without a care in the world. The fact is that Carol Danvers was a gorgeous woman and Natasha had eyes, thank you very much, but the biggest problem was that they had been spending more time together since the blonde seemed to decide she would stay on Earth for a while. She wasn’t just gorgeous, Natasha didn’t take too long to notice. Carol was smart, brave, compassionate, charming, sarcastic and fun to be around. She could put up with Natasha’s smart mouth and they spent several nights playing chess or checkers, something that was way more fun than it should be.

It all meant that now Natasha was finding the act of eating an apple way sexier than she should and it bothered her so much that she had to look away and grab something else inside the fridge.

“Oh, sweet!” Carol exclaimed after she chew. “You’re making dinner?”

“Are you hungry?” Natasha asked instead of saying she was planning on eating whatever she found inside the fridge.

“Yeah!”

And that’s how Natasha found herself cutting things at the long-forgotten cutting board that she was sure Pepper put there for them. Carol tried to help at first, but Natasha took the knife from her hand when the woman accidentally cut through the first cutting board. After that, she sat at the counter again, as if the kitchen didn’t have dozens of chairs for her to do it, and chatted with Natasha while the other woman took care of everything.

“What are you going to do?”

“A Russian typical dish,” Natasha answered. “Raw fish with uncooked potatoes.”

Carol blinked. “Uh-”

The shorter woman looked up with a teasing smile. “I’m messing with you.”

“Oh,” Carol breathed out in relief, putting her hand against her chest when a laugh escaped her lips. “Wow, for a second I thought you were trying to kill me.”

Natasha shook her head in amusement and returned to her task of chopping some parsley. “I’m sure you ate worse things during your trips.”

“Well, yes, but I have high hopes here,” the superhero joked. “So, really, what are you cooking?”

“Golubtsi,” Natasha replied in perfect Russian to someone that didn’t even have an accent. “It is typical from Russia, actually. I think you might like it, but I will warn you that I haven’t cooked this dish for a very long time.”

“I’m sure it will taste great,” Carol said with a soft smile as she watched the woman.

“You made me curious,” Natasha changed the subject suddenly. “What’s the worse thing you ever ate?”

Carol thought about it for a moment, tapping her chin with a finger, before she looked back at Natasha with a grimace. “Not the worse, but the weirdest. Tentacles.”

The redhead arched one eyebrow at her. “Tentacles?” She repeated, receiving a nod in confirmation. “Of what?”

“To this day, I have no idea.” Carol’s face contorted in disgust and a visible shiver ran down her body, which made Natasha laugh lowly. “And I think it’s better if I never find out.”

“Poor Space Cadet,” Natasha teased as she moved to put the parsley inside a bowl so she could cut the onion.

“Space Cadet,” Carol scoffed even if she smiled widely at the stupid nickname.

Natasha only smiled to herself and moved to grab the onion, however, she stopped herself when she saw the jar of olives she took from one of the cabinets. She forgot about it before because her plans included eating the olives while she cooked, so she decided to open it now. Natasha used a cloth to dry her hands and then tried to spin the metal lid to open it, but it didn’t move even slightly. She knew she could open it, really, but her eyes caught Carol just sitting there kicking her legs like a small child and it was an easy decision. The redhead walked closer to the superhero and held the jar in front of her.

“I know I can use warm water to lose the lid and open it, but you’re here and I think you can be a perfect jar opener,” Natasha said before she gestured with the jar when Carol didn’t move to grab it.

The blonde then took it from her hand with an eye roll and had no problem opening the jar with a single movement that didn’t even make her muscles tense. She handed it back to Natasha, who was now smiling gladly at the open jar, and crossed her arms next. “Is that all I am to you?” She joked.

“No,” Natasha answered with an olive already inside her mouth. “I’m pretty sure you could open the tomato sauce can too.”

Natasha winked at her, smiling, then turned around to put the olives inside a small container while Carol huffed, trying to pretend she was mad. The Russian woman had just grabbed the knife again when she realized how domestic it all seemed. Carol watching her cook, opening a freaking jar for her, laughing at her lame jokes and just being there with her soft smile. And Natasha was cooking for her. And she thought about a dish that the woman would like, and she wanted to make small talk, and she wanted to find out everything about Carol Danvers.

Because she liked her.

As soon as that thought crossed her mind, the knife descended to cut the onion, finding her finger instead.

“Fuck,” Natasha hissed, letting go of the knife and the onion out of instinct as she took a step back to take a look at the damage.

Before she could, however, Carol jumped from the counter and was standing in front of her so fast that Natasha barely noticed her move. “Let me see,” the woman demanded, all joy gone from her voice.

She held Natasha’s wrist gently, praying for her to let her see, and the redhead didn’t have to think much before letting the woman take her already bloody hand in her own. The cut on her index finger wasn’t that deep, but blood was running freely from it and the burning she felt couldn’t be ignored. Carol tried to look at it for a while, but the blood didn’t let her assemble how bad it was, so she pulled Natasha towards the sink carefully, where she turned the faucet on and put Natasha’s finger under the running water.

“Sorry,” Carol mumbled when the other woman hissed again. “Just making sure you didn’t cut anything important.”

Natasha bit her bottom lip to stop herself from replying, deciding it was better not to try to fight the worried Carol since it didn’t do her any good the other times she tried. Carol only relaxed when the blood cleaned enough for her to see that Natasha hadn’t accidentally almost chopped her finger off and that it wasn’t so bad that she would need stitches. She actually sighed in relief and her shoulders relaxed so visibly that Natasha stared at her with her eyebrows raised.

“It won’t stop bleeding until we hold something on it,” Carol said after a while, already looking around to find something she could use. She finally saw the paper towel at a reaching distance, which she promptly grabbed to take a few from the roll. She took Natasha’s hand from the water and wrapped her finger with the paper towel, holding it tightly. “Come on, let’s make a bandage.”

“There’s no need for that,” Natasha stopped her before she could start pulling her towards the bathroom. “It will stop in a few minutes.”

“It could get infected,” the blonde argued.

Natasha looked at her with both brows raised high. “I thought you forgot how to take care of wounds.”

When Carol’s cheeks flushed a light shade of pink, Natasha just knew her answer would mean something. “I made some research,” she mumbled under her breath before giving Natasha’s arm a gentle pull. “Come on, let’s at least put a band-aid at it. Humor me,” she added when she noticed the other woman was about to deny it again.

It was perhaps the way her lips curled up again, but Natasha found herself agreeing with that even if she thought it was ridiculous. They walked to the bathroom where Carol grabbed the first aid kit that she knew was there, all while Natasha watched her moves carefully as if she was trying to understand something or crack one of the difficult codes she used to hack computers with. Carol tried not to pay attention to that while she grabbed something to clean the wound first.

“That’s the fourth time you bleed in my presence. I’m starting to pick up a pattern,” Carol joked to break the sudden heavy mood that fell on the room.

“Is that why you made research?” Natasha asked quickly.

Carol opened and closed her mouth a few times, clearly not sure how to respond to that, until she sighed and shrugged. She took the bloody paper towel from Natasha’s finger to put it under water again while she put the antiseptic on the cotton. “Well, I just thought it wouldn’t hurt to know a few things. I mean, I knew, I just had to remember. It has been a while since I needed stitches or a bandage.” She paused then, refusing to take her eyes away from the injured finger. “Humans are very… vulnerable.”

The last sentence was said in a whisper and Natasha wasn’t sure if she was supposed to hear that or not. She did, however, she had no idea how to reply to that. It wasn’t exactly what Carol said, but how she said it. Natasha knew from her late-night conversations with Carol over the chessboard that the blonde could only worry about the safety of her family while she was away in space, so she could assume that the superhero wasn’t talking only about herself getting constantly injured while Carol was around. Even so, it did seem like she was. Natasha averted looking at the other woman’s face when her stomach churned and it was only then that she realized Carol’s hands started to shake at some point.

“I’m going to be fine,” Natasha said. “It’s just a small cut, you know?”

When Carol looked up, Natasha offered her a smile that was equally reassuring and amused. The blonde held her breath for a second before she chuckled and turned to grab a band-aid. “Sorry. Guess I’m still a little shaken after taking you to the hospital,” she teased while placing the band-aid in the right place. “There you go. I’m not a doctor, but I think it’s safe to say you’re going to be just fine.”

“I told you so,” the Russian declared without removing her hand from Carol’s grasp. “You didn’t need to worry.”

“But I do.” Carol frowned and looked down. “I know you’re a very strong, capable woman that could probably kick my ass if you want to, but…”

Natasha waited for the rest of the sentence, but it never came. Instead, Carol brushed her finger over the band-aid. The shorter woman followed the movement with her eyes before she raised them to look at the woman standing in front of her. She wouldn’t be able to explain what possessed her to do it, but Natasha suddenly leaned forward. The tip of her nose brushed against Carol’s and she gave the woman enough time to stop her if she wished. Carol didn’t and she understood that as a sign that it was okay to keep going.

Their lips met in a soft touch that made Carol gasp. Natasha smiled into the kiss when she heard it and the smile quickly became a giggle, a sound that the redhead didn't make very often. Carol ended up laughing as well and their lips parted. Feeling giddy with the sudden feeling that rushed through her body, Natasha turned her head enough to rest her forehead against Carol’s shoulder. The blonde curled her strong arms around her waist, pulling their bodies closer, and Natasha felt the woman’s chest vibrate with another quiet laugh.

"It took you long enough to do that," Carol whispered.

Natasha felt her face heating up. "Why was I the one that needed to make a move, huh?"

"Because I didn't want to be punched in the face, that's why," the superhero replied.

Natasha sighed then and closed her eyes for a moment, trying to figure out everything that had happened, but her mind was immediately filled with doubts and fears. She couldn’t help but mumble: "What are we doing?"

Carol delicately nudged Natasha away so she could look at her face. It was either her bright eyes or the happy smile she was holding, but, whatever it was, Natasha felt some of her worries washing away. "Well, we were making dinner, remember? And I don't know about you, but I'm starving."

"You're right," Natasha replied with a smile of her own. "Let's go back."

They walked back to the kitchen silently. They weren't holding hands and they didn’t kiss again, however, Natasha felt like something major had changed between them. It didn't make her uncomfortable, not even when she noticed Carol stealing glances at her while they walked. It made her grin, though, and she tried to distract herself by picking up the knife on the counter again.

"No, no, no," Carol stopped her quickly, taking the knife from her hand and nudging her to the side. "You need to take care of that finger of yours. I can handle it."

Natasha arched one eyebrow at her and placed both hands on her waist. "Not to be a jerk, but I don't think you can."

Carol laughed loudly this time. "I can!" She insisted, nodding. "Just give me the instructions and I will make it work."

"Please, don't destroy our kitchen," Natasha pleaded as she took a step back. To be fair, she was sure they would end up eating instant noodles because Carol wouldn’t be able to make anything, but she thought it would at least be fun to watch.

So, getting ready for the show, Natasha placed both hands on the counter behind her and pushed herself up, sitting in the same place Carol was before. For the next hour or so, she explained step-by-step the recipe to the blonde all while trying to make sure the entire compound wouldn’t be blown away.

"Taste it," Carol asked, coming closer to her with a spoon in her hand, putting the other hand beneath to make sure it wouldn’t fall on the floor.

Natasha let the woman put the spoon inside her mouth and felt a blush rising from her neck when Carol placed a hand against her tight, watching her expectantly for the verdict. "This is not bad," the redhead declared after a few seconds. "But it needs more parsley," she added.

"On it!" Carol exclaimed, already meaning to turn around to chop more of the parsley that was left, but Natasha quickly stopped her by wrapping her legs around the woman’s hips. Carol froze for a second, wide eyes and open mouth. "Oh."

Natasha only smiled when she put her hand on the back of Carol's neck to lean her in for their second kiss. It lasted longer than the first one, enough so that Carol found a place standing between Natasha’s leg to stay while both of her hands rest on the woman’s thighs, at the same time her lips seemed to tingle in excitement. Natasha kept her hand on Carol’s neck and her other arm thrown over her shoulder lazily, but her ankles crossed behind the blonde and her heart was beating way faster than it should be.

Now, Natasha wasn’t the romantic type. She didn’t believe in the type of love that could move mountains and oceans. Neither did she believe in kisses that made someone see stars behind her eyes. She did, however, felt her entire body buzz with something while her lips danced with Carol’s, the shiver that ran down her spine when their tongues met and the warmth getting lower into her body as Carol’s hands started moving forward.

It made Natasha think why on Earth it took so long for that to happen. She couldn’t remember why she had tried to keep her distance from Carol, why she was scared to feel anything when she saw the woman laughing across the chessboard, why she was trying to run away. It was hard to remember any of that when, at that moment, all she wanted was to get closer. Closer and closer and closer.

The tip of Carol’s hands had just touched the inside of her thigh when Steve’s deep voice was heard all across the compound and the two of them jumped apart so fast that it was like they burned each other. Natasha jumped from the counter while rubbing at her lips with the back of her hand, even if Carol wasn’t wearing any lipstick for it to be smeared all over her face. She didn’t allow the blonde to say anything, though, because she turned around and left the kitchen so fast that she nearly bumped into Bruce on her way out.

 

[...]

It was a bad idea.

Terrible.

She made a list, which sounded a bit idiotic of her, but it helped her to think more clearly.

Well, it became quite clear that it was a terrible idea.

For one, Carol traveled a lot. Which, okay, fair, it was a stupid reason because all of them traveled a lot, to be fair, but they traveled on Earth. Carol took her spaceship - or whatever she wanted to call it - and she flew across the galaxy jumping from one planet to another. She had been doing that for decades. She was barely on Earth at all, which made her constant presence at the compound the last months ever weirder, but that part didn’t make it to the final list.

Carol was also old. Well, that wasn’t the problem per se because Carol didn’t look a day older than thirty, and that was the thing. Carol wasn’t a normal human, not anymore. She didn’t age like everyone else. It would come a time when Carol would still be young and energetic while all of them - except for Thor - would be all wrinkled and grumpy.

And, fine, those were the only things Natasha could think to put on the cons list, but they were big deals. Huge, she reasoned with herself. Which meant that she ignored Carol for the next two days like she had an alien plague or something. She moved out of the way, she avoided being in the same room as her, she stayed more time inside her room and she didn’t wander into the training room because she knew that’s where Carol spent most of her days. Instead, Natasha locked herself inside the computers room with Tony and tried to think about anything else.

It, of course, didn’t explain why, on the third day, she found herself walking angrily toward an oblivious Carol standing across the yard while putting a few things inside her ship.

“What are you doing?!” Natasha exclaimed, still several feet away, which made the other woman jump a bit in surprise.

“Uh-” Carol looked around in confusion as she watched the shorter woman striking at her like a very, very, very, angry train. “Putting clean socks inside the-”

“Why?” Natasha interrupted her as she finally stopped in front of the woman.

Carol glanced at her, then back to the socks she had in her hands, before setting on Natasha again. “Because all the other ones are dirty?”

Natasha huffed. “So, you’re leaving?”

“Well, I suppose,” the blonde answered hesitantly.

“That’s great,” the Russian sarcastically scoffed. “That’s exactly what I was avoiding before.”

“What?”

“This!” She motioned with her hands at Carol. “All of this!”

Carol looked down at herself in such an innocent way that Natasha felt her heart pang inside her chest. When she looked up again, Carol had a frown and clear confusion written all over her face. “I’m sorry, Nat. I don’t understand.”

“You’re leaving.” Natasha very suddenly lost all fight inside herself. Her shoulders dropped, as did her voice, and she looked up at Carol so lost that the blonde took a step toward her. “You’re leaving,” she repeated in a whisper.

“I thought that’s what you wanted,” Carol confessed equally quietly.

“Why would I want that?”

“Because you have been avoiding me for days now.” The superhero raised one eyebrow in questioning. “I thought you wanted me to be gone.”

Natasha sighed heavily and raised her hands to grab a handful of Carol’s suit. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to push the woman away or pull her close, and, in the end, she did both. “I don’t want that.”

“What do you want, then?” She didn’t get a reply. All the redhead did was shake her head and look down, which made Carol take a deep breath before gently placing her fingers under Natasha’s chin to make her look back up. “Nat…”

“I can’t ask you to stay,” the woman admitted with sorrow clear in her voice. It made Carol’s heart break into small little pieces. “I can’t ask that from you. It would be selfish of me, because you love the space. You’re the Space Cadet.” She said the last line with a small smile.

“I can’t ask you to go with me,” Carol replied. “Your family is here.”

“But do you?” Natasha looked up with her eyes shining with what appeared to be tears she refused to drop. “Do you want to ask me to go with you?”

Carol nodded without having to think about it first. “I wouldn’t want anything else,” she declared. “I stayed here because I didn’t want to stay away from you.”

“Why?”

This time, Carol smiled. “Is it too hard for you to believe I just wanted to?”

Natasha sighed and shook her head in exasperation. “Yes because the most exciting things around the last months were you keeping me from bleeding around.”

“You are very frail, you know?” The blonde whispered after a pause and her hand raised to rub at the scar left on Natasha’s shoulder. “You’re powerful and dangerous, but you’re also human. I’m afraid something will happen to you and that I won’t be able to do a single thing about that.”

Maybe that’s what was on Carol’s list, Natasha thought to herself. It made her think if Carol even thought this through before deciding she wanted to spend more time with Natasha because that lead both of them with a lot to lose and not much to be done about it.

“In our world,” Natasha started after she looked too long into Carol’s eyes, “where anything can happen at any time, I think we should all live our lives to the best of it.” She paused to let her words sink in, but also because she was repeating those words inside her head over and over again. “I won’t ask you to stay,” she repeated.

“That’s okay,” Carol replied quietly. “You don’t have to. I’m offering to.”

“And, just so you know, I’m not usually that clumsy.”

Carol chuckled now, curling her arms around Natasha’s waist without a care as to who might see them. “That's a relief to hear, actually. If we’re making confessions, you should know I snore.”

Natasha’s laugh filled the space around them and Carol was sure she made the right decision.

[gwens-fiction]

Summer Vacation

A My Baby's A Werewolf short, that I thought I posted before but didn’t see it in my tags, so I’m posting it now.

With a long groan, Sebastian dropped his messenger bag and draped himself face down over the couch. "Remind me why I assign final essays and not exams again?"

Cody looked up from his magazine with an amused snort. "Because you’re an English professor? Were they that bad?"

"Not exactly….Just trying to focus on them was brutal."

"You need a break, Seb. When was the last time you got a full night’s sleep anyway?"

"Probably before Evelyn left. You know it’s just been crazy ever since."

"You need a vacation."

Sebastian lifted his head towards him, poking his glasses further up his nose. "Oh yeah? And what am I supposed to do about Amber? Look for hotels that accept pets?"

"I already paid the down payment for us to rent a cabin in the mountains. I picked one in the woods that isn’t close to other neighbors. The three of us will have plenty of privacy and quiet."

"I don’t know, Cody…A cabin in the woods sounds like a setting for a horror story." He sat up and sighed.

"Well, we are bringing our own little monster." He snickered.

"CODY. MY TODDLER IS NOT A MONSTER."

The slightly younger man gave him a very calm, pitiful expression. "Sebastian. Your toddler is a werewolf. By definition, she’s a monster."

"Still, there’s connotation there. Amber isn’t a monster. She’s a…"

"Creature? A little Beas—UMPH!" He grunted as a couch pillow hit him in the face.

Sebastian sighed, shaking his head. "My daughter the werewolf and my brother the troll, what am I going to do with you two?"

"Hey, as your brother it is my birth given right to drive you crazy. Now, the vacation? Is it a yes?"

"I’ll pack my suitcase." He smiled tiredly at him.

Cody jumped up. "No need! Amber and I already packed it and the car, we were just waiting on you."

"Suddenly, this is feeling less like a vacation and more like a kidnapping."

"Now that’s the spirit!" He grabbed his hand and pulled him up. "Go ahead and load up. I’ll grab her." He gave him a nudge towards the door.

"You know, Cody? You may have been on to something with this idea of yours." Sebastian looked over from the novel he was reading, at his younger brother, who was manning a small, charcoal grill.

Cody pointed a spatula in his direction. "I told you. You needed a break."

"I don’t think I was the only one who needed one either." He sighed, looking now at his daughter, rolling around in a clover patch. "Amber seems to really enjoy it out here."

"Seb, she’s a werewolf. Where do you find wolves?"

"In the woods, I know I know." He rolled his eyes at him. "But this is too far of a commute from the college for me to live out here and work there." He paused. "But more frequent small trips I suppose could be managed during the year. It would be more peaceful grading out here than at my office."

Cody nodded, flipping over a steak. "I’ll keep an eye out for somewhere a little closer."

Sebastian nodded as well, returning his attention to the novel in his hands. He pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose once more and sighed. As much as he loved a good Jules Verne novel, his focus was gone. He needed to relax and take a break, this is true…But it wasn’t getting him any closer to finding a cure for his daughter.

Werewolves weren’t supposed to actually exist, they were folklore…and yet, here was his toddler, a living example that perhaps folklore may be more real than he and other scholars would want to believe. That being said, real or not, his toddler was not supposed to be one. It wouldn’t be safe for her to grow up into a full fledged one, either. As a werepup at least she was manageable….But what about in the future, when she’s grown up? The teen years has enough drama without werewolf secrets in the mix.

Sebastian was then jolted back to reality as something slimey was dropped on his hand. He nearly jumped out of his chair and dropped his book on the ground.

"Daddy! Look! Look, Daddy!" Amber giggled.

"Oh uh…Thank you, Amy, that’s a nice—" and then he looked at his hand. A long, spotted slug now rested on the back of his hand. "….slug. It’s….very spotty?" He faked a smile.

"Uh huh! Mine." She then took the slug back.

Sebastian watched her for a moment before signing deeply. "Here, Amy, let’s return Mr. Slug back to his home then go wash your hands, okay? I’m sure the slug has a family he’d like to go back to."

"Oh, okay." She nodded and offered the slug back to him.

"How about you sit him right here?" He squatted down nearby and patted a patch of grass. His toddler trailed over and plopped the slug right there with the widest smile.

"Good job, now come on. Let’s get you cleaned up for lunch." He chuckled, scooping her up in his arms.

[yourimagines]

fluff alphabet with nate diaz!! 💓

I included Nick also in this one

What they like about you fluff

* English is not my first language I apologise

* Triggers: Fluff

Nick

A = Admiration, what he absolutely adore about you: You’re kindness, he thinks you’re to kind for him and he also believes that he doesn’t deserves you.

B = Body, what is his favorite part of your body: You’re small hands, the are soft and small, when you touch him he feels the electricity going through his body.

C = Cuddling, how he likes to cuddle: You laying on his chest, kissing softly his chest as he has his arms protectively wrapped around you. It’s a good position for him to smoke or just to kiss your head.

D = Dates, what his ideal date with you would look like: going to a lunchroom to have lunch together or just drive around in his car. Just seeing you happy is good enough for him.

E = Emotions, how he express his emotions around you: he tries to be more open with you about his emotions but usually he shuts you out, he has a lot going on in his mind and it’s giving him anxiety attacks and he doesn’t want you to see him like that, he’s afraid that you would leave him.

F = Family, does he want one? If he does, when: When he was younger absolutely not but now that he’s older yes but he thinks he’s to old now to start family so you guys are those cool uncle and aunt, that spoils them.

G = Gifts, how he feels about gift giving? What is his habit when it comes to this: He sends you now and then some flowers or something you really love. He does this to show you that you mean so much to him and that you deserve everything in the world.

H = Holding Hands, when/how he likes to hold hands: he holds your hand in crowded public places so you can’t get lost or when you have cold hands he likes to warm them up by just holding them.

I = Injury, how he would act if you got hurt: he would lose his mind while trying to stay calm for you but the person who did this to you is better be gone otherwise he’s in big trouble. If you hurt yourself he would be angry at himself for not being there for you to protect/help you.

J = Jokes, does he likes to joke around with or prank you and how: he likes to fake fight you or something else that’s making you laugh, he loves your laugh and smile so he would fool around, making jokes and stuff.

K = Kisses, how he likes to kiss you: on your soft lips, just tenderly and slow. Pouring all of his love in those kisses.

L = Love, how he shows you he loves you: He has his eyes on you, everywhere and always. Holding you close to him as he has his arm wrapped around you. Also being a gentleman to you, holding the door open, giving his jacket to you if your cold, holding your bag, helps you out with things, buys you flowers. He’s always there with you, making you feel safe and loved.

M = Memory, favourite memory together: trying bjj out for the first time with him, he had a good time, teaching and guiding you, while hearing you laugh and giggle as you tried to submit him. The whole day was filled with laughs and kisses.

N = Nightmare, what is his worst fear: he afraid that the voices in the back of his mind are right, that you don’t love him anymore, that he’s losing you or something like that. He’s afraid to be alone in this world with out you by his side, his sunshine.

O = Oddity, what is one quirk he haves: His way of communication, it’s confusing sometimes as he tries to tell you something but he doesn’t know how to say it but over the time you guys been together he’s more comfortable around you and you learned how to deal with it.

P = Pet Names, what he likes to call you: Babe or darling

Q = Quality Time, how he likes to spend time with you: At home, watching some movies, smoking some pot or go out to have some lunch, just the simple stuff that makes him calm and less anxious.

R = Rhythm, what song reminds you of him: any song from the deftones. He likes them and is a fan since the beginning.

S = Secrets, how open is he with you: He’s not very open, he tries to be but doesn’t want to be a burden to you, he wants to deal with it on his own.

T = Time, how long did it take you to get together: 1 month because he didn’t want to lose you, he was afraid you would move on or someone else would steal you away from him.

U = Upset, how does he acts when you’re upset: He tries to listen, comfort you and reflect on it but his mind is running faster then his mouth so he will get frustrated at himself, that he can’t process everything and then he mostly screws it up by telling you to shut up so that he can think… he always apologise to you immediately and tries to be more aware of your emotions as well.

V = Vaunt, what is he proud of, Does he likes to show you off: That you are not embarrassed to be with him and you always have his back. He’s proud you’re just like him, honest and not afraid to be real.

W = Warrior, how would he feel about you fighting? Would he fight for you: he hates to see women in general fighting, so he absolutely hates it if you want to fight or learn to fight but he loves you and would do anything in the end for you. He definitely would fight for you, he’s more alert if you are at his side then he’s alone, he’s always protecting you.

X = X-Ray, how well can he read you: He sees everything, even tho he isn’t a big talker himself, he sees every little change in your behaviour.

Y = Yes, how would he propose to you: somewhere private but cute in your opinion. A beautiful ring and him kneeling down on one knee, asking if you want to be a Diaz.

Z = Zen, what makes him feel calm: having you by his side, your small hands on his chest helping him to calm down from a anxiety attack or after a big fight. You waiting for him as he goes out for a run to calm down.

Nate

A = Admiration, what does he absolutely adore about you: that you love his family, that you’re a family person, just a positive person who loves him.

B = Body, what is his favorite part of your body: your waist, he loves it, always holding you by your waist, his hands are made for it.

C = Cuddling, how he likes to cuddle: Spooning, him holding you close to his chest as you lay your head on his chest, placing small kisses on him.

D = Dates, what his ideal date with you look like: Going to his favourite restaurant for some dinner after hanging the whole day long with his crew/friends.

E = Emotions, how he express his emotions around you: he’s open with you, he tells you everything but he’s always embarrassed as he needs to cry or showing you his weak side.

F = Family ,does he want one, If he does when: Yes he always wanted one with you and now you have one. You have three children and he loves them, he’s that cool dad that teaches his kids everything.

G = Gifts, how he feels about gift giving? What is his habit when it comes to this: He loves to make you feel appreciated so he makes sure your favourite snacks are in the house and he always brings you something after he comes back from a trip, snacks or something you need/like.

H = Holding Hands, when/how he likes to hold hands: he only holds hands if you really want it, he’s not a big fan of holding hands, he’s more a guy that wraps his arm around your shoulder or waist, just having you close to him

I = Injury, how would he act if you got hurt: he’s angry, immediately trying to figure out what happened and who did that to you.

J = Jokes, does he likes to joke around with or prank you and how: he loves to fool around, especially with you. You like his little dad jokes or his funny comments, you guys also love to Joke around together.

K = Kisses, how do he likes to kiss you: On your forehead or your temples, loves to kiss you there as he has his arm wrapped around your shoulders, pulling you close and leave a kiss behind.

L = Love, how he shows you he love you: Calling or texting you if he’s away from you, he wants you to know that you’re always on his mind.

M = Memory, favourite memory together: meeting his family for the first time, they were all kind and friendly towards you and that was also the first time that Nate and you slept in the same bed, all cuddled up because the bed was to small for two people.

N = Nightmare, what is his worst fear: That something bad happens to you or the kids and he isn’t there to protect you because he’s away most of the time.

O = Oddity, what is one quirk he haves: His way of talking, you find it normal now but when you met him it was difficult to follow him what he was saying. Truth is he always talked like this, sometimes he’s talks a bit more clear but that because he’s not having some anxiety attack.

P = Pet Names, what does he likes to call you: babe or mama’s.

Q = Quality Time, how he likes to spend time with you: spending time together at home or going to the movies, doing the things he’s not doing with his friends.

R = Rhythm, what song reminds you of him: every time you hear insane in the brain by cypress hill it reminds you of him, he’s a big fan of them.

S = Secrets, how open is he with you: he tries to tell you everything but when it comes to sharing his feelings it can get difficult.

T = Time, how long did it take you to get together: 2 months, he needed some help to ask you out and become officially together

U = Upset, how does he act when you’re upset: he gets upset as well because he doesn’t know how to react, he hates to see you like that and his emotions get the upper hand.

V = Vaunt, what is he proud of, Does he likes to show you off: that your the backbone of the family, you keep everything running as he is away, earning some money. You are at home, taking care of everything, the house, the children. He likes to remind people that you’re the one that keeps the family on the right track.

W = Warrior, how would he feel about you fighting, Would he fight for you: You and fighting? Nope that’s not happening, he will make sure you never have to fight, you have him to fight for you.

X = X-Ray, how well can he read you: he doesn’t notice it immediately but when he knows he knows. He does know when your upset or angry but the rest is sometimes a gamble. Are you crying because your happy or are you sad? Is that a hint you want to leave or….?

Y = Yes, how would he propose to you: he would ask you to marry him, somewhere in a park. Romantic but a bit private. He would go down on one knee for you.

Z = Zen, what makes him feel calm: Your voice, just hearing you talk makes him all zen. A good ride in the forest on his bike calms him down as well but your voice does it a bit better.

[lichenstone]

I've seen several posts recently about hope and optimism in stories, and my brain is currently locked on to One Piece; so let me take a sec to talk about my girl Nico Robin and why I love her so much.

Now I'm not near caught up with OP, but from what I know of Robin's character arc from what I've already seen (Water 7/Enies Lobby) and what I know of her story going forward, there is so much to be found in her character that I absolutely adore. (also spoilers for a series over 2 decades old ig)

When we first meet Nico Robin, it is in an antagonistic capacity; and while we know she's working against the strawhats, her motives for doing so are mysterious. We learn of the very basics of her dream to uncover the true history of their world and she joins the crew at the end of the arc. As time goes on in the episodes leading up to the next major arc, Robin's initially cold exterior towards the rest of the crew softens in a way that feels very natural. She's older than all of them and she's a bit of an outsider having previously been an antagonist, but she's still living and travelling with them, a bond is basically inevitable. She quickly becomes a valued member of the crew not only for her skills but also for her company and friendship.

During all this time, Robin is very passively suicidal: she never actually attempts to take her own life nor deliberately takes any actions in fights that may lead to her death, but she isn't opposed to dying if it's something that just ends up happening. She cares deeply about her new friends, but she doesn't put any particular value on her own life and doesn't seem to think that her death would affect them much.

This all changes during the Water 7/Enies Lobby arc. Robin's past catches up to her, and she has to make some very difficult decisions in order to keep her friends safe, which she believes would be away from her. She is fully prepared to sacrifice her own life and freedom if it secures those of the people she's come to cherish in her travels. But, this is the strawhats we're talking about, and they are Not Having it. They do their best to convince her to return to them, almost literally talking her down from the ledge. She's been told time and time again that she, like everyone, deserves freedom, deserves to love and be loved; and this time, something finally gives.

In one of the most moving scenes in anime history and with stellar performances done by both her Japanese and English voice actors, Robin *screams* her desire to live, breaking down from all the emotional suppression she forced herself into for the sake of survival and joining her friends once more.

After this, Robin becomes of the most subtly optimistic characters is think I've ever seen. She's a very intelligent individual, and often fully understands and voices the worst possible outcomes for any given situation, but she stubbornly refuses to give in to those possibilities. She's found her reason to live again, and she is happy to share that with whoever needs it.

I just love Robin so much, and I love characters who have had to fight tooth and nail for their optimism and treasure their joy and those who bring it to them with all their hearts. As nice as characters who are portrayed as natural optimists are, I think that there needs to be more characters like Nico Robin who show that optimism and hope aren't easy, but they're worth it. If not for the effects they can have on you and your loved ones, then for how they can drive us to move for a better world.

[copyrightcreep]

You know the drill, all of the questions >:)

alright you evil critter. time to do the typing.

who is/are your comfort character(s)? Astarion and Karlach from bg3. space core from portal 2. Alex Danvers from supergirl. Luz and Vee from The Owl house.

lighter or matches? matches

do you leave the window open at night? sometimes. but usually, yes.

which cryptyd being do you believe in? werewolves and skinwalkers

what color are your eyes? mixture of green, blue/grey and brown

why did you do that?

hair-ties or scrunchies? hair ties

how many water bottles are in your room right now? 2. one i use for work and one for when i'm at home.

which do you prefer, hot coffee or cold coffee? hot coffee in the morning, ice coffee when relaxing

would you slaughter the rich? with much glee and different ways to do so yes.

favorite extracurricular activity? biking and people watching!

what kind of day is it? murder on the brain, pain in the limbs kinda day

when was the last time you ate? an actual meal? at 10 am. is 2 pm now.

do you love the smell of earth after it rains? yes.

are you a parent? (all answers qualify) of a bunny called Mochi. but not of human kids no.

can you drive? n o p e aha.

are you farsighted or nearsighted? near-sighted

what hair products do you use? shampoo, conditioner and a hair mask.

imagine we’re at a sleepover, would you paint my nails? if you asked. absolutely.

do you say soda or pop? f r i s d r a n k but soda in english

something you’ve kept since childhood? trauma. uh i mean. a stuffed animal i got since birth. his name is Mousey.

what type of person are you? i act very indifferent at 1st but i will flipping do anything if you get my trust. and i will share everything when safe.

how do you feel about chilly weather? love it. i can't feel cold all that well so i thrive in winter months.

if we were together on a rooftop, what would we be doing? i'd bring snacks and a nice fluffy blanket maybe a picknick. talk and eat until night and then stargaze all night

perfume/body spray or lotion? body spray

a scenario that you’ve replayed multiple times? a lotta stuff. but i'll go with my mom's death since it's most recently been on my mind.

about how many hours of sleep did you get? uh. like 6?

do you wear a mask? during covid, yes. regularly? not unless it's required for work.

how do you like your shower water? a lil shy of burning my skin off

is there dishes in your room? yepp. kinda always are

what type of music keeps you grounded? 2 types. emotional stuff i relate to. and vibey music.

do you have a favorite towel? yes, it's a white one with rainbow squares. i love it!!

the last adventure you’ve been on? probs when i was a kid running trough the forest with my siblings.

is there a song you know every word to by heart? oh boy do i. nearly every song from icon for hire, smash into pieces and a bunch from Florence + the machine

what’s your timezone? CE(S)T. the S is for Summertime

how many times have you changed your url? nada on this blog haha

someone in your life, other than a relative, you’ve known for 10+ years? no one i actively speak to. but @stephlastname comes the closest with like 7 years.

a soap bar that smells good? bars of soap elude me.

do you use lip balm? i should. but i don't

did you have any snacks today? had some chocolate snacks.

how do you take your coffee? 2 zoetjes or 1 packet of sugar and 2 milk.

an app you frequently use besides this godforsaken site? whatsapp and discord

what’s your take on spicy foods? occasionally very good. but my childhood makes it rough to enjoy them.

you get a free pass to kill anyone, who is it? Past: Hitler, Present: Putin, Personal: an old teacher who didn't 'believe' in adhd.

can you remember what happened yesterday? sorta, feels like walking trough mud to remember.

favorite holiday film? the 1st home alone

what was the last message you sent? dang right i want to!!

when did you first try an alcohol beverage? oh jeez. i tried wine when i was like 7 or 8. beer around the same time. somebody gave me a bunch of vodka when i was 17. i almost forgot the time where my mom let me drink a whole glass of bacardi cola when i was 9

can you skip rocks? NOPE. i flipping suck haha

can i tag you in random stuff? absolutely and please do!!

thanks for the askkkkkk