#in a way that wasn’t? idk waving it in your face like a horrible punishment

[aliosne]

When I started watching a LOT of horror let’s plays, I started noticing just how often wheelchairs are used as shorthand for horror in a way that is at best lazy and vapid and at worst just. Wildly ableist and misapprehensive of what wheelchairs actually mean to the people who use them. Like when I got around to rewatching Silent Hill 4 and it hit the corridor fulla chairs, I just burst out laughing bc it was the laziest, stupidest thing I’d ever seen like it was almost a transcendent moment of parody except. yknow. not.

if u consider yourself a horror fan you like NEED to be aware and educated on the ableism thats been put at the heart of so much horror. like... is that character actually scary or do they just have a limp/scars/disfigurement that real normal people have irl and have to see depicted as horrifying and dehumanizing? if you think any of those things or things like it are scary in ANY context you need to step away from the horror genre and familiarize yourself with the fact that people can and do look like that and they do not deserve to be an object of fear

[pixy-stix-art]

I was thinking about the tiny assistant au and like how it would be so crazy and jarring if benchtrio switched places! Idk how that would work logically, the best my brain could think up is either a shared dream or just like, not cannon but I would love to see you write it.! Ranboo having to get used to being big and not having information just. Fed through their brain + having to walk everywhere and being super tired bc tubbo usually carries them. And not knowing how gentle to be with tubbo.1/2

Ok so I know I should work on the beginning of this AU, but this was too good not to do something for. So not cannon, but a very good idea. I don’t know how close this ended up being what you wanted, but I hope you like it. This would take place before Tubbo finds Tommy and shortly after Tubbo and ranboo actually become friends.

(I spent way to much time on this and I’m still not perfectly happy with it so hope you enjoy. I was to frustrated to grammar check too, also sorry it’s short)

THE SWITCH

Tiny assistant AU

(Warnings: accidentally fear play, hurt/comfort panic)

———————————————————————

Ranboo gasped at he woke up. He was on a soft surface. He must be on Tubbo’s pillow. He set up looking to see if Tubbo was awake yet. But now as he set up he was equal size with all the bed and all the familiar furniture of Tubbo’s room. He tried not to panic thinking this must be a dream, but he didn’t have dreams… He slowly stood up looking around. He was human sized now. He tried to feel outwards with his mind for his phone to maybe figure out what happened. But he couldn’t feel his phone. Ok, now he could panic.

Tubbo grumbled as he woke up on a hard cold surface. He couldn’t remember why he wasn’t in his warm soft bed. He set up rubbing his eyes. He froze as he looked around. He… he was sitting on top of a phone…on his desk. He yelled scrambling away from the phone. That he now recognized as Ranboo’s. “What the fuck?!” He yelled catching up to the fact that he was small. As small as Ranboo or Tommy was.

Ranboo jumped out of his spiraling thoughts as he heard a scream. A familiar one, Tubbo. He looked around not seeing his friend. “Tubbo?” He called out.

Tubbo froze as a voice calling his name rang out. He covered his ears, it was too loud! He wimped as he felt information buzz in his head informing his that it was Ranboo who called him. But how was Ranboo so lound? Unless… He slowly took his hands off his ears now fully looking at his giant room. There stood someone who he assumed was Ranboo, but he didn’t look quite the same…. He looked human. No mismatched skin or tux. Just a normal black shirt with black n white pants, and blonde-ish hair. “Ranboo…?” He called out nervously to who he hoped was his friend.

Ranboo heard a small voice say his name. He turned looking at the desk. His eyes widened to see Tubbo standing on the desk. He slowly walked over and bent down so he could be at eye level with Tubbo. “What happened?” He asked eyes shining with awe.

“I-I don’t know….” Tubbo said backing up from his much bigger friend. Oh god….he was so much taller now…

“I think we switched, I’m human and you’re a assistant?” Ranboo tilted his head. Tubbo looked a bit different. Did he have, horns? He reached out to Tubbo curious of what he was looking at. He quickly pulled his hand back seeing the fear on Tubbo’s face. “Oh, sorry…” He winced.

Tubbo took a deep breath seeing the giant hand retreat. “Um, it’s ok. You just startled me a bit.” He was more then startled but he Rudy want Ranboo to feel bad. He was so much bigger now, Ranboo could literally do anything to him right now. Maybe he would? After all Tubbo did to him at first, why wouldn’t Ranboo want a little revenge?

“Oh, ok.” Ranboo said much softer now. He felt bad for scaring Tubbo. He wasn’t used to being scary. Tubbo must be so freaked out. “I was just curious about your horns.” He said.

“My whAT?!” Tubbo screeched feeling his head. Sure enough there was two small horns coming out of his head. “I have horns?!” He yelled freaking out again.

“Whao! It ok.” Ranboo said trying to calm him down without touching him. “You’re a assistant now. It’s not permanent!” He rushed out not wanting Tubbo to get to upset. Negative emotions took up more battery. He didn’t want Tubbo to have to deal with a low battery.

“How do we know it’s not permanent?! We don’t even know what happened to us!” Tubbo glared at Ranboo. He paced the top of his desk. “I’m so small right now anything could happen! I have a headache from this constant stream of information running though my head! I can’t even understand half of it, and you could do whatever you wanted to me! You could take your revenge for everything I did to you…” Tubbo stoped pacing as he got the the end of his rant. He looked nervously up at Ranboo. Oh no, this is when he hurts me. He thought.

Ranboo felt horrible hearing the end of Tubbo’s rant. He wasn’t going to hurt Tubbo! They were friends now, he wouldn’t ever hurt him. “Oh, Tubbo. No I’m not going to hurt you.” He said sadly.

“B-but I deserve it. After hurting you so much…. I should have some sort of punishment for what I did.” He hung his head. He tensed up seeing Ranboo being his hands up to him and curl around him. He squeezed his eyes closed.

Ranboo gently and slowly curled his hands around Tubbo. He gently rubbed Tubbo’s back. “Hey, Tubbo look at me.” He said softly.

Tubbo slowly opened his eyes and looked up at Ranboo. “W-what are you going to do?”

“I’m not going to do anything.” Ranboo frowned. “You’re my friend Tubbo. I’m would never hurt you. I know you’re scared, but it’ll be ok. I promise.”

Tubbo broke down going to hug Ranboo’s fingers. “I-I’m so sorry.” He sobbed clinging to Ranboo.

“You don’t have to apologize. I know how scary it is. But I’ll help you till you get back to normal.” Ranboo said curling his fingers around Tubbo. “Can I pick you up.” He asked.

Tubbo was nervous to be held. But he nodded anyway. If Ranboo wasn’t going to hurt him then it should be ok to be held. He just wished he could turn his brain off.

Ranboo curled his fingers around Tubbo picking him up. He was fascinated by what it felt like to hold a small person. He was surprised feel how protective he was over Tubbo like this. “You ok?” He asked holding him near his face.

“I think so….” Tubbo said starring into Ranboo’s eyes with awe. They where so close right now.

“Ok good.” Ranboo sighed. He smiled softly noticing Tubbo staring. “Whatcha looking at?” He asked with a chuckle.

“What? Nothing!” Tubbo looked away laughing. The tension was slowly going away.

“Uh huh…” Ranboo rolled his eyes. He smiled. It was good to hear Tubbo laughing.

It was calm as they talked like they always did. Till Tubbo frowned feeling a ache in his arm. “Ow….” He mumbled.

“What’s wrong?” Ranboo asked.

“My arm feels funny?” Tubbo shook his head.

“Does it hurt?” Ranboo held Tubbo closer looking him over.

“Kinda? It’s really not that-“ Tubbo jumped as a lound voice? Ran through his head telling him he needed to charge and the pain got worse.

“Tubbo?!” Ranboo asked worriedly.

“I- think the battery in the phone is low…” He leaned back in Ranboo’s hand not being able to sit up.

“Oh no-“ Ranboo rushed to find his, no Tubbo’s phone. He grabbed it and hurriedly plugged it into a charger. He looked back at Tubbo in his hand. “Is that better?”

“A little.” Tubbo nodded. “The pain is going away.” All though slowly… he wasn’t going to tell Ranboo that.

“Ok good.” He sighed. He hadn’t wanted Tubbo a go though that. He should’ve kept an eye on the phone. “I’m so sorry I should have charged the phone sooner.”

“It’s ok. I’m ok.” Tubbo waved Ranboo off.

“I’m pretty sure you’re not…” Ranbo was going to say more but was cut off by a door opening and closing now stairs.

“What was that?” Tubbo asked hearing the loud slam.

“I think that was your dad coming home.” Ranboo said quietly frozen still.

“Oh shit-“

[sweetberrysmooch]

HC: Crush Interactions. [Ghostbur]

(Is it weird to still see you everywhere I go now that you’re dead?)

(Full transparency, this is what I had originally written for the Ghostbur request I got ^^;  I wrote it late at night and didn’t realize til morning that it wasn’t even what the og requester had asked for.... and that it was kinda sad. SO! I’m posting it separately, but as a Crush Interaction set. Thank you to noctis-yeye for both the request, and the excuse to start a new series!)

Characters: Ghostbur, with some mentions of Wilbur.

Warnings: Toxic relationship with Wilbur (mentions of it) and leftover fear from when he was alive. Idk what else to put, but just as a general heads up, this is not a very happy piece. 

Song Recommendation: Old Friend- Mitski

I promise the other character interactions won’t (probably) be as solemn as this one, and hopefully the actual request will soften the blow <3 Have a swell morning!

From day one, Ghostbur was attached to you. When he first appeared on your doorstep early one morning, all vacant smiles and blue tinged skin, you had thought he was a mere hallucination, a phantom, further punishment from your grieving mind that just wouldn’t let you be from Wilbur’s influence. You flinched when he would reach out, stepped away when he got closer, and all but avoided looking him in the face. The resemblance was uncanny, but this specter was no Wilbur.

Despite that, and despite your inner insistence that you would not let yourself be hurt like that again, especially not from his remnant, Ghostbur pried apart your distrust and set himself utop your hurt, doing his very best to  soothe the ache and pain that had settled there. It got to a point where nearly every day he would follow you around as you went about your business, quietly hovering over your shoulder and watching you work.

He’s very polite, quick to stay out of your way but waiting with obvious intent for the moment you ask him to do something for you. Usually that just amounts to holding your bag as you collect resources, or holding the lead on an animal you're moving, but it’s charming the way he perks up when you so much as look at him. You don’t know if he notices, but the way his cheeks and ears burn a dark blue after you thank him makes your heart race. You hope he won’t notice. It’d hurt too much to get attached again.

Another thing Ghostbur tends to do is leave you on your own for a minute or two to find something to give you. It’s strange, and the gifts are typically a little… off, but even you can admit it’s an endearing action. Carefully plucked flowers, pretty stones, soft colored wool, eggs, anything he thinks you might like is tucked into his pockets and brought quickly back to you. The gift he brings the most is clumps of dark blue dye, gently handed to you with a distant, saddened look, and a low, “Please, have some blue, lovely. You seem so sad today.” Something in your heart breaks with how his eyes are so much like Wilbur’s. It hurts even more that it feels like he can see right through you like Wilbur could.

It’s not all sad faces and frowns though. Ghostbur also tends to show you cool places he’s found or brings you with him to talk with other friends. It feels nice to see them after what happened, to talk to them and laugh once more without having the weight of war hanging over your heads.

Tommy and Tubbo are incredibly psyched to see you again, lamenting about how much they had missed you while you were grieving, how much has changed, and how you seem more happy now. Stable is what Tommy says first, but after Tubbo nudges him hard in the ribs, he backtracks to happy with a strangled breath. Ghostbur had been next to you in the moment, quiet and smiling vacantly like normal. It’s around that time you felt his hand graze the small of your back. Tentative, and then more solidly when you didn’t move away. His arm slipped around you while the kids exuberantly spoke about how Tubbo’s presidency was going, and it never really left until you had gotten home.

He starts holding your hand after that. Neither of you mention it, but every morning when you leave the house and start your walk down the path, his fingers slowly thread with yours til your hands are clasped loosely. He has a tendency to run his thumb over your knuckles when he’s thinking (a difficult task, head empty), and it reminds you of Wilbur and how he would play with your hands when he was bored.

Many times back when you lived in Pogtopia, Wilbur would clutch your hands to his chest with wild eyes and speak in fervid whispers, trying to hurt you and rile you up with his words so you’d begin to hate like he did. But Ghostbur isn’t like that. His hands, ethereally chilled and no longer blemished by war, never gripped yours tight enough to bruise, nor did they ever trap you in a heated (and unasked for) debate of right and wrong. 

Ghostbur isn’t like Wilbur at all really. Every moment you see his wide, pupil-less eyes, or catch sight of his thick curls, the harsh tone you’re expecting never comes. He seems doleful in a way, distant, but still morose as if he was the one to hurt you. It’s the strangest part about him, how he claims that he doesn’t remember much besides the fact that the two of you were particularly close (dark blue staining his face as he spoke, grinning at you softly), but there’s moments where he seems so… Wilbur like. Especially on your harder days, where his death resonates and tears at your insides, Ghostbur becomes much more somber as he comforts you. Whenever you flinch or startle, he becomes tearfully apologetic, hurting for something he can’t remember. 

It’s for mutual comfort the first time you pull him into a hug, seeing as he started to cry after watching you fearfully flinch away from him late one night. The moment stabs at you with how Ghostbur really isn’t Wilbur, the realization sinking in as you rub his shaking back to calm him. Something settles in your chest afterwards, and you can finally breath again.

(Ghostbur stirs his hot chocolate sullenly, watching with tired eyes as you stoke the flame burning in your fire place. The tear tracks under his eyes only slightly burn now, but he barely notices it past the pain in his chest. He doesn’t understand why he had become so overwhelmed when seeing you jerk away from him, but it burned worse than the tears that had followed. His mind, usually fuzzy and clouded felt sober for once. 

He had done something horrible, something that left marks on your psyche and made you scared of him. Heart pounding, he curled in even more around his drink, ducking his head as he prepared for another wave of blistering tears to come. He’s stopped though by your hand, just barely grazing the top of his head. 

As he looks up, he’s comforted just by having you look at him. You don’t seem upset anymore. Unconsciously, he leans into your hand, shivering when your fingers slip through his curls and brush through his hair. Maybe things aren’t too far gone yet. Maybe there’s still time to make things right.)

Don’t forget to take care of yourself today! See you later :]

[magioftheseas]

Jagged Along The Edges

For @badthingshappenbingo

Prompt: Broken Angel taken from here.

Rating: M

Warnings: Body horror, violence, gore, cannibalistic thoughts, but I swear to god this is supposed to be hurt/comfort/treating injuries

Notes: Idk why I wrote another Persona 5 fic despite not reblogging p5 content, but shuake’s too powerful or something. Also the power outages are making me lose my mind. Wheeeeeeeee.

***Alternate Ao3 Link***

Commission? Donate?

Whoever would have thought that angels had fangs? Certainly not Akira, who had just been bitten to shit by the angel he just found and had thought to help.

He had a bad habit of trying to help as a human, and it turns out that habit carried over as a demon, albeit one of a low level. He can certainly imagine the same looks of disapproval as before when people realize that he held out a hand to a supposed enemy of his race, but would he have acted any differently?

Well.

He’s still acting the same now, enflamed bitemark on his arm be damned with the rest of him. His biter is still glaring, snarling, and hissing at him like a feral cat. Quite unbefitting of an angel—except this creature probably couldn’t be called an angel anymore.

Not with its wings ripped off like that.

What was left were mangled, jagged edges of bone and a few bloodied clumps of feathers sticking to the back. It was curled up so pitifully but was still managing quite the fierce little glare. Since being bitten still hurt, it wasn’t like this once angel was completely defenseless. But it was still in pretty horrible shape, and Akira didn’t even know if it retained any level of intelligence.

Angels are always so fucking pompous and up their asses. An angel wouldn’t be caught dead looking this unhinged and disheveled. More akin to an animal, running on nothing more than fear and aggression—but, even so.

Well. Akira half-wanted to pounce, never one to miss out on an easy meal. Especially one with such gorgeous fucking eyes, like hot damn—sorry state or no, the angel had eyes as deep and potent as the finest blood-red wine. Akira wasn’t so noble as to not be tempted. He’s still imagining it. This angel, who’s skittering into the corner it’s been backed up in, would have just the richest taste.

He wants a taste. Just a little.

And the angel hisses, but it’s also cowering. Poor thing. Poor, wretched creature. Its tortured state was so excessive. It must have really pissed off some higher-ups. What a tragedy. He should put it out of its misery.

He should. Especially since the little beast fucking bit him. His arm fucking itches, too. Angels are venomous to demons, but since this one’s so injured, it’s more of an especially annoying bug bite than anything remotely lethal. Most other demons would’ve acted immediately, and Akira’s stuck staring helplessly at this thing while he still tries to formulate a plan to approach it without an attempt made on his throat.

What a pain. Physically and metaphorically.

This stupid creature had yet to let its guard down, too. If Akira had been interested in eating it, he would’ve done so by now. Or he would’ve left. This just wasn’t worth the trouble of staring stupidly with a face scrunched up in concentration—that probably just looked like constipation.

“I...” He drawls. “I’m not trying to hurt you.”

No answer. Same as last time.

“You’re in an awful state,” Akira explained like he was talking to a child. “And l don’t feel comfortable leaving you alone.”

The angel spat at him, hissy and frazzled. It would be really fucking cute if it wasn’t really fucking annoying.

Ah.

If he just stands there, that angel will surely bleed to death or something.

...

Fuck it.

That angel sure had some lungs when Akira pounced.

--

One thing he had to admit was that even while mutilated, the angel knew how to fight. Like really knew with how its body moved and how it clearly aimed for weak spots with its nails and teeth. Just when Akira thought he had it pinned down, he had to jerk back before his face got clawed off. And the angel took off the flesh of his nose, leaving Akira to hiss between his cheek and shove them down with far more force than he would’ve preferred.

“I’m trying—to help you!” he got out through gritted teeth. “Let me help you! Who else could’ve injured you like that but a stronger angel?!”

The angel, back against the ground, screeched. No surprise there. Anything against those injuries surely felt like agony, and when Akira pressed harder, he almost immediately jolted back by the next heartrending, distorted scream.

“Sorry,” he whispered, not that the angel could hear when it was now sobbing. That face was twisted in tortured misery, and that expression was far too much to take.

“S-Sorry!” Akira yelped, pulling the angel close. Careful to avoid its back, he frantically cooed and stroked its hair. He minded any tangles and knots, murmuring soft reassurances with shaking shoulders. “It’s okay, you’re okay, it’s okay...”

The angel whimpered, digging its nails into his shoulders. Since it was more out of desperation than anything, Akira allowed it without missing a beat. For added measure, the angel was huddling closer, even to the point of pressing its face into Akira’s collarbone with a pained whine.

“Good...fucking god...” Akira utters. “What the fuck did they even do to you?”

He didn’t get an answer. The angel had gone limp against him, breathing harshly against his neck.

He didn’t have time to lose before booking it to his place.

--

“Aw jeez, aw fuck, aw jeez... What the hell...”

Akira considered himself fairly proficient in magic, even healing magic. But no matter how much energy he channeled into the angel’s body, there was just no smoothing out the crude edges of bone where wings had once been. He’d have to do so a more old-fashioned way with a really tough grater, which he doubted the angel would respond well to.

For now, he focused on the more treatable injuries. The scrapes from the earlier tussle, some miscellaneous lacerations, and a couple of bruises for good measure. There was some internal bleeding to deal with, but overall, the most damage was situated on the back. The angel wouldn’t even be able to lay down like this.

Akira wiped himself off, sighing and cursing whatever monsters of this angel’s kind had thought this humane much less justified. While he had heard of angels getting their wings torn off before, it was always at the roots. Leaving gaping holes in the back that, while pretty horrifying in their own right, would still be preferable to this shit.

Just thinking about it pissed him off to no end. And maybe the angel could sense him just buzzing with fury because it began to stir from where it was propped up against its side on the wall.

��Ah,” Akira clicked his tongue. “No, no, just...rest more.” His hand hovered by the angel’s shoulder. The angel’s face scrunched up, and despite everything, Akira’s breath caught at just a glimpse at a sliver of deep red from the angel’s eyes. “It’s...uh...”

The angel was staring at him now, and he was left speechless.

Oh, he thought as those red eyes bore into him. Beautiful.

“...f-feeling better?” he choked out as the angel blinked at him. “You, uh... You don’t...seem...to be afraid of me anymore. That’s good.”

The angel kept staring, and Akira let out a strangled laugh.

“Right, uh, you...might still be...”

“You.” The angel pointed at him, slurring its words. “You are an incomprehensible demon.”

“And you can talk,” Akira remarked, with dull surprise. “Great. That makes things easier—but why didn’t you speak earlier? Were you really that scared?”

The angel shook its—his head.

“It’s not that,” with a sigh, he stated, quite clearly. “I just hate demons. They irritate and infuriate me beyond my capacity for speech. And I really hadn’t been in a mood to converse in the first place.” He was speaking like they were just discussing the weather. “Since you helped me, I suppose I owe you now. What is it that you want?”

“I...” Akira blinked. “Your...name...? Maybe?”

The angel’s eyes narrowed sharply and, oh, those eyes were deadly. Akira could get lost in them for millennia.

“Akechi Goro.” The angel turned away the best he could without brushing his back against anything. “Surely that’s not all.”

“Kurusu Akira. Nice to meet you.”

“It’s not that nice.”

“...”

Akechi, huh.

“I... Uh, I did the best I could with your injuries. But for your back, I’d have to...smooth it down...” Now wasn’t the time to be getting nervous and now especially wasn’t the time to notice that the angel had quite a lovely profile. A strong, defined jaw and nose—angels were beautiful in general, but this one... No. Fuck. Akira had to focus. “I need tools for that. So, um, be patient with me.”

“It’s not like I have much else of a choice,” Akechi replied softly and sullenly.

Is this really the same angel I found? Did my feral beast of an angel get replaced when I wasn’t looking?

“Uh...” Rather intelligently, Akira scooted closer. “Do you mind if I...ask who did that to you? You—don’t have to answer.”

“I don’t know who it was specifically,” Akechi said, waving his hand dismissively. “But, as you can no doubt tell, this is punishment.”

“It’s torture.” Akira didn’t waste a second. “Tearing your wings off like this was unnecessarily cruel.”

Akechi seemed to smirk before his face fell.

“A demon with morals,” he said, snorting. “Now I’ve really seen it all.” He leaned his shoulder into the wall. Akira hovered by, uncertain. When Akechi’s eyes shut once more, the spell was broken and Akira was able to distance himself once more.

If Akechi was aware of the effect he had, he didn’t remark on it. But if he did know, Akira had a feeling that it’d be used to the angel’s advantage. Akira had to be careful. Since Akechi wasn’t a mindless beast, that meant...

It meant a lot of things. Akira imagined the other probably had a lot on his mind. Especially with how tense he was around the shoulders. Considering his situation, it was more than understandable. It was admirable, even, that Akechi was keeping his cool like this.

Akechi still had his guard up, which was fine. Akira didn’t expect any different.

“I don’t plan on hurting you,” he announced as if that would serve as a reassurance. Akechi was unmoved, even as Akira stressed, “I don’t plan on eating you, either. I want to help. What happened to you wasn’t right.”

Akechi gave a non-committal hum.

“I’ll do what I can about your injuries,” Akira went on. “Once you’ve recovered enough, you can decide for yourself what to do. I’d, uh, prefer you didn’t kill me afterward though. I’d hate to have to fight back.”

“Demons are wretched, malicious creatures,” Akechi said, rattling off the rhetoric Akira’s heard a thousand other times from countless other angels and humans. “It’s not uncommon for them to toy with their meals. To build them up, tear them down, and savor every last drop.”

The thing is.

Remaining humanity aside, Akira can’t deny how appetizing Akechi looks. And how the thought of Akechi cleaned up and pristine made his mouth water. Even now, Akira stares at the slope of Akechi’s neck, the curvature of his shoulders, his waist, and thick thighs—and his teeth itch to sink in.

It’s in his nature to eat, and Akechi’s a hell of a fucking meal. Angels always tasted best.

With the way Akechi does look at Akira’s mouth, the angel surely knows this.

So, why hadn’t he tried to escape yet?

Probably, Akira’s brain supplied. Because he not only has nowhere else to go but nothing to live for.

How pitiful.

Wouldn’t it be merciful to put this creature out of its misery?

Just because it’s in my nature doesn’t mean I can’t make choices.

“I’ll get something for your back,” he said, turning his back on the angel. Giving Akechi ample time to lash out if so desired. “Sorry. It’ll be a moment.”

He leaves, and he takes more than a moment. More than enough time for Akechi to escape if he so pleased.

When he came back, Akechi hadn’t moved at all, but he was staring up at him with two haunting eyes.

Everything was settled without the need for words.

(Even if Akira was seized by quite the unfortunate desire to pull Akechi close and not let go.)

(For a demon, hunger and sexual desire often got conflated. With Akechi, the latter was bound to become more and more of a fucking problem.)

[izzy-b-hands]

Aten Pt. 3

How much longer will this fic be? Idk, but I’m having fun, so here we go again!

Went ahead and just uh...sort of created my own canon re: the tablet. Look, if the movie writers could do whatever they wanted with it, so can I lol. No rules, no right, just me doing whatever I want with canon. 

We get nsfw at the end because I couldn’t help myself lol. Definitely gonna be a part four and maybe more?? Because I’m not done with these two yet. 

My love to all who read/like/reblog!

He was bored. Horribly bored. It was silly, he knew that. After all, they’d only had two dates. To be so attached this much already was ridiculous, foolhardy.

Yet he lay on the couch in the employee lounge, doing nothing except feeling lonely and trying to get his sandals off his feet, using only his feet to kick and tug at them. 

Larry walked in, and sighed. “Important business, huh? You ever lose your hands, you’ll be set.” 

They shared a brief look, and Ahk broke.

“I miss him,” he grumbled. “And it isn’t his fault; he needs to keep up his studies, and I’m being childish and silly and stupid and-” 

“And you still miss him despite all that, and that’s okay,” Larry interrupted, lifting Ahk’s legs so he could sit on the end of the couch, letting Ahk’s legs sit on his lap. “It isn’t a bad thing. Just means you really like each other, and that’s what you wanted, right?” 

“It is,” Ahk replied. “But this is...fast. Too fast? I wouldn’t know, I’ve never had anything like this. Flings, sure, but nothing concrete. Nothing where we both wanted...” 

“More?” 

He nodded, and covered his face with his hands. “I don’t want to mess this up.” 

“You aren’t going to mess anything up,” Larry soothed. “You two have barely gotten started, so don’t go worrying about an end that you might not even have.” 

“I suppose you’d know,” Ahk said. “I mean, you’ve been in a...well.” 

“You mean my divorce? Yeah, that’s a sort of ending for a relationship. But a whole different level than where you two are. Don’t worry so much; you and...what have you been calling him? He told me, but I won’t want to get it wrong.” 

“Aten,” Ahk replied. “Because he warms me like the sun used to.” 

Larry smiled. “You really are falling hard, aren’t you?” 

“I am,” Ahk admitted softly, blushing as he pondered what Aten was up to with the group project. Was he tired, frustrated, stressed? “I’d rather learn to fly beside him though, instead of falling until I hit bottom, you know?” 

Larry nodded. “I get it. And I think you two will be just fine. Physically, at least, we know for sure you’re good together. I mean, I presume, from accidentally walking in, and-” 

“I’m so sorry about that,” Ahk said, blushing even more. “We really will start locking the door, I promise.” 

“It’s okay,” Larry laughed. “No harm done. And if you needed anyone else to have uh...proof that you two are getting along, well, I saw it. You have anything planned for tomorrow night with him? On the couch or off of it, I mean.” 

“Stop!” Ahk found himself giggling. Giggling! When had his afterlife ever held so much joy? It was wonderful. “A movie, maybe. I do want to get to know him, not just his body. I figure that might be an okay time to sit and relax, talk some.” 

“I can try and get you some movies,” Larry said. “Unless you both really want to watch the movie on whales playing in the theater here. But he likes classic older movies, I know that much, so if you want me to...” 

“You wouldn’t mind?” 

“Of course not. I’ll find some DVDs for you, make sure the player in here is up to snuff. Not sure it’s ever been used, if I’m honest,” Larry replied. “We’ll get it all set up, and you two can have a movie night for the next few nights. Sound good?” 

Ahk nodded. “Thank you, Larry. For all of this.” 

“Not a problem. I like helping you two out; you’re good, sweet kids.” 

“We’re both adults,” Ahk laughed. “We do act a bit like love-sick teenagers though, I suppose.” 

“If anyone has a right to moments like that, it’s you,” Larry said. “You deserve a chance to just relax, have fun with someone. I know you don’t really ever stop being royalty, but...some time off, maybe. Or time where you don’t have to think about it, or act like it. He knows and likes you for you, not the pharaoh he read about on your informational plaque.” 

He lifted Ahk’s legs and stood, setting them gently back on the couch. “I’ve got some other chores to look after, but I’ll try and check back in on you, okay? You good alone in here? Not gonna pine too much?” 

“No promises,” Ahk snickered, but inside his heart was heavy. How quickly he’d gotten used to Aten’s attention and presence, to something that was too new to be love, but tasted sweetly of it, and that he couldn’t get enough of. 

He was glad he hadn’t promised as the night progressed. He languished alone in the lounge, trying to think of anything other than Aten, his voice, his smile, his hands, his lips. 

Finally, he broke down and retrieved the pen and paper from his things in Larry’s locker. He hadn’t written love poetry as others his age had for their lovers, though he’d thought about it once or twice. He couldn’t match the beauty of the tablets displayed in the hall near his exhibit, bearing love poetry that took one’s breath away. 

But he had to try, or his heart would burst. And hopefully, Aten would be as kind and receptive to it as Ahk expected. 

He hid the final draft with him in his sarcophagus. He knew Larry wouldn’t judge him for it, but for now, it was for his and Aten’s eyes only.

***

He nearly fell out of his sarcophagus in his rush to leave it the next night. He was ready for it, to show Aten the poem, to have movie night with him, to sit and snuggle and talk. It was all terribly romantic, and he loved every bit of it.

But Larry was the only one that greeted him at the main desk. 

“It’s okay,” Larry reassured. “He’s just got a bad cold, and he was very worried you could somehow get sick, so he didn’t want to come in-” 

“I’ll go to him then,” Ahk interrupted. 

“Ah,” Larry mumbled. “You’d have to ch-” 

Before Larry could finish his sentence, Ahk dashed to the lounge, changing into his sweatshirt and pants at the speed of light, leaving his royal garb tossed on the couch.

He panted as he arrived back at the desk, feeling to ensure the poem was still safe in the bag of his things that he’d taken from Larry’s locker. He wasn’t sure he’d need any of it, but better safe than sorry. “I’m changed.” 

“So I see,” Larry laughed. “I told him I was sending over a surprise. He misses you too, so this will cheer him up. All he could talk about when he called me earlier, actually. He hated the idea of not making it in tonight. I doubt you can get sick though. Anyway, I called you a cab, and you’ll have to be back-” 

“I could spend the day with him,” Ahk interrupted. “There’s a...how to word it. A setting? On the tablet. Only I can change it, as the guardian of it. It leaves the magic...on? I don’t know how else to explain it, and I know it has something to do with running on the power of the moon and the sun then, but-” 

He waved a hand. “That doesn’t matter right now. What it means, is I could spend the night and day with him, and I promise to be careful and safe and-” 

“Slow down!” Larry held up his hands. “I’m not arguing! Though I am curious...you never wanted to change the setting ever before? To see what would happen if you left everyone alive all day?” I know it won’t affect everyone else now, but...” 

“I wanted to save it for emergencies,” Ahk replied. “And this is one!” 

“Okay,” Larry smiled. “Tell you what. You go change it, and I’ll get the DVDs I brought in your bag. I’m sure he’s got some way to play them. Go on, get it done!” 

He ran again, nearly sliding past the open door to his exhibit in his haste. The changing of it was easy enough. An incantation and the flip of a square on the tablet, and a moment later he could feel it was done as the tablet glowed briefly. He felt more energized, more alive. It was wonderful. 

Now, he had a boyfriend (or something close to one, since they hadn’t said that word yet) to go look after. 

He browsed the DVDs as he rode in the cab. The Clock, Funny Face, An American In Paris, The King and I...movies he knew, and had seen once or twice, but only while on display near the theaters in other museums, the times they had displays on famous films and plays. 

The selection only sort of mattered anyway, and Larry had done fine enough. Ideally, they’d be able to sit and talk while the movies played in the background, though he couldn’t fault Aten if he fell asleep. He remembered sickness like that, in a vague way, that left the body weary and weak. So long as they were together, he’d be happy. 

Aten’s apartment building was plain, but he remembered other students at other museums speaking of living in such conditions. When school was the priority, any roof (particularly a cheap one) would do. 

He used the buzzer in the front hall, and hoped Aten was still awake enough to hear it. 

“Larry?” Aten sounded utterly miserable.

“Not Larry,” Ahk replied, and smiled at the happy if tired laugh that answered him. 

“No way! Come on up...oh god, I’ll be dressed decent by the time you get up here, I promise.” 

“Decent or indecent, you’re perfect either way,” Ahk said before charging up the first two flights of stairs. By the third, he had slowed down. By the fourth, Aten’s floor, he was cursing the invention of stairs. 

He leaned against the door, trying to look like he didn’t feel horribly out of breath and exhausted from only four flights of stairs, and knocked. 

“Hey! Ah, the stairs got ya. Happens to everyone; they take getting used to,” Aten said as he ushered him in. 

“Do they punish you by not putting in an elevator? Are they unaware that the technology exists?” 

Aten laughed, then coughed hard. 

“Go sit,” Ahk instructed, setting his bag on the small table in between the kitchen and the living room (really just one room, though the table wasn’t a horrible line of demarcation.) “I’m here to take care of you.” 

“You might get-” 

“I don’t think I can get sick,” Ahk interrupted softly. “And even if I do, you can just return the favor later and take care of me.” 

“Deal,” Aten sighed as he flopped onto the couch, looking absolutely adorably cuddly in his own sweater and sweatpants. “Sorry I’m not great company tonight. I feel like shit. Do you have an ancient Egyptian cure for that?” 

“No, but Larry apparently bought you cough syrup,” he said, pulling a bottle out of the bag. He hadn’t seen Larry sneak it in, but it was certainly a sweet gesture. “That’s as close to a cure as you’ll get.” 

“You don’t know any magic cures for colds?” 

“Sorry, my love,” Ahk said as he brought the bottle and DVDs over to the coffee table by the couch, and sat by Aten. “Even we didn’t figure that out. Not with or without magic.” 

“Love?” Aten smiled.

The blush left him feeling overly warm, and he looked away. “Sorry, that’s-” 

“Really sweet, and just fine,” Aten interrupted, and grabbed his hand. “My DVD player is really out, and kind of shitty, but why don’t we throw something on and you can cuddle with me. I think that’s a cure for a cold, I read it somewhere.” 

“Did you now?” Ahk teased as he went to put a DVD on, grabbing one at random. “And where was that? What journal?” 

“Very highly respected one,” Aten replied with a grin. “Love-based medicine journal. I think you’d like it.” 

He sat at the DVD player for a moment more, and giggled. “Sounds reputable. You’ll have to read it to me sometime.” 

“To you?” 

“Sure. I can spend the days and nights here now, if I want, and I might need a bedtime story,” Ahk said as he moved back to the couch, the beginning of the movie flashing on the screen of Aten’s TV. “I mean, I said just tonight and tomorrow to Larry. But I think, even after the tablet is fixed, there’s a way for me to arrange it so the magic continuing into the day only affects me.” 

There was, and he knew it for sure, but that was his secret to hang onto for now. Larry might not go for it right away, and he wanted to give him time to warm up to it. 

“You...so there’s a way to use it so you can stay alive during the day too? You get to spend the night?” 

“If you’ll have me,” Ahk replied, wrapping an arm around him. “I don’t want to impose.” 

“No, not at all. I want you to stay,” Aten said, then sniffled. “Sorry.” 

“Don’t be sorry, you can’t help it. Relax, rest. You need it.” 

They sat for a bit then as the King and I played, Aten eventually laying so his head was in Ahk’s lap, and he could run his hands through that reddish-blonde hair, watch the light from the one small lamp hear them catch it. 

Aten sighed softly, and stretched carefully, not unlike a cat. 

“You like that?” 

He nodded. “You’re gonna put me to sleep if you keep playing with it like that though.” 

“You need the sleep,” Ahk replied. “I’ll be here when you wake up, don’t worry.” 

Aten buried his face in Ahk’s stomach and his heart leapt. It was so cute it hurt.

“This is way too early to say this, but-” 

“Why?” he interrupted. “Why is it too early?” 

Aten moved his face back, and looked up at him. “Because in other relationships, it was. I scared them off, I think. I don’t mean anything by it, like we don’t need to run to get married right now or anything, but I mean...okay, I do mean something by it, and that’s that I love you and I love that you seem to love me and I really hope we keep loving each other like this, even though I know nothing’s perfect all the time.” 

He took a breath, but Aten coughed and kept going. 

“And I know that means we might fight over stupid shit, or have days where we’re both too tired to do anything other than sit near each other, and I know that this has to be a certain way because of who you are and what you have to do, and I’m more than ready to do whatever I have to so that all works out. I’m ready to work to preserve something that feels like it’s gonna be so good, even better than it already is.” 

His breath was gone then, as he gently moved Aten up close to him and kissed him. Aten’s arms were around his neck, and he could feel how warm the sickness had made him. 

“Dizzy?” he smiled as he let Aten lay back.

“In a good way,” he replied. “I take it that meant...” 

“That I love you too, and whatever and however we make this work. If I had my way, I’d never switch the tablet back, and we’d do this right. Staying together, not having to worry about my getting back to the museum at any point.” 

His statement hung in the air for a moment as Aten’s eyes went wide. “Holy shit. That’s...for me? Really?” 

“Really,” Ahk said. “...you’re actually dizzy right now, aren’t you?” 

“Yeah,” he sighed, and closed his eyes. “But that’s just the cold or whatever this is fucking up my inner ear, not you, I promise.” 

“I know, don’t worry. Maybe I should put you to bed though. We could save the movies for another night.” 

“No, I’m good,” Aten said, his eyes still closed, and immediately yawned. “Ignore that, that’s uh...a weird cough.” 

“Sure it is,” Ahk said, and started to play with his hair again. 

By the time the movie was over, Aten was snoring softly in his lap, turned slightly on his side. He need to be in bed, properly, that much Ahk knew for sure. 

Moving him, however, was a less than easy task. He didn’t wake so much as opened and then promptly closed his eyes again as Ahk worked to sit him up, then to drag him off the couch and down the hall to the bedroom, passing the alarmingly small bathroom as they went. 

“You’re lucky you’re so cute, and I’m so strong,” Ahk teased as he attempted to drop Aten gently on his bed. 

“You are so strong,” Aten mumbled, half-muffled by the part of the comforter smashed against his face. “I love it. C’mere, I wanna feel your muscles. Lemme feel.” 

“You can do that tomorrow; you need sleep now,” Ahk said as he pondered if trying to move Aten so he was laying in the bed, not just flopped onto one side of it would be worth the trouble. He was at least on the bed, after all, and apparently comfortable enough. 

“Nah. Gotta feel ‘em, right now,” Aten rolled over, his eyes barely open as he reached his hands out for Ahk. 

“You’re too tired, it’s making you silly.” 

Aten grumbled something, and rolled back over, sighing into the comforter. 

He bit back a laugh. It was adorably pathetic, the poor thing. “Shall I help you actually get into the bed? I bet you’d be more comfortable than you are now.” 

“Eh.” 

“I’ll let you snuggle with me if you properly get in the bed.” 

Aten scrabbled forward and then up and over so he was finally at one of the pillows on the bed. “I did it.” 

“Yes, you did. I should go get you the medicine-” 

“No. Just want you,” Aten interrupted. “That’s good medicine.” 

“You and that love-based medicine journal. Dangerous reading, it seems,” Ahk joked as he lay down beside Aten. 

The way Aten immediately leaned over to kiss him, hard, then moving to lay on top of him was no joke however. It was good, the best, though he knew he needed to stop him. As much as they both might want it, what Aten really needed was rest. 

But he let it go for a few moments, finding it impossible to stop from moaning and whimpering under Aten’s kisses and touch. 

“Fuck,” he murmured after a particularly searing kiss, that left him grinding his hips as hard as he could against Aten’s. They were both hard, and he wanted desperately to get both of their clothes off, to be as close as possible. 

But that wasn’t what they should be doing, and he tried again to speak up, only for it to turn from a “I know you’re tired, why don’t we pick this up in the morning” to a “fuck, please don’t stop” as Aten moaned against his neck, bit down just so on his shoulder, whining and sighing as one of his hands moved to pull Ahk’s legs around him. 

Finally, he managed it. “Love...hang on.” 

Aten stopped immediately, eyes open wide. “I’m sorry; are you okay?” 

“I’m fine. But you aren’t. You’re sick, and you should be asleep right now. I can see you’ve got your second wind, but we can always finish this in the morning.” 

“But you’re close, aren’t you?” that was a wonderfully wicked smile that broke only to kiss him again as Aten’s hips moved against his. “So am I.” 

“This isn’t up for debate,” he tried to say, but it turned into a gasping sigh. “You...fucking hell. You really want to finish this, now?” 

Aten was wide awake now, he could tell that, those deep, dark gorgeous brown eyes looking into his in such a way he couldn’t break the connection of the gaze. 

“I want this. As much as I want all of it. To be with you all through tomorrow, to sit and talk and do whatever else we want. To keep seeing you whenever I can, to keep doing this whenever we both want to and can. As much as I want you, for you. The man behind the crown that plays with my hair and drags me into bed when I don’t feel well, that loves me.” 

The tears that fell were happy ones as he let himself rock against Aten again, kissing him softly, sweetly. They came within moments of each other, limbs intertwined, his legs pulling Aten as close as he could possibly be. 

“You...fuck, sorry, I....” he could hardly catch his breath as they calmed, hips still jerking every now and again against each other. “You need to sleep now.” 

“You’re right,” Aten sighed, and kissed him. “So do you. You get to sleep, actually sleep for once. You remember how?” 

“Funny,” Ahk smirked as he untangled himself from Aten, to try and find a towel to clean them up. But the bathroom only had room for the toilet, bath, and a medicine cabinet. “You don’t have towels?” 

“They’re in here. I don’t have anywhere else to put them, so they’re in my dresser.” 

Ahk came back into the bedroom, and frowned as he retrieved one from the third dresser drawer. “I don’t even want to know how much you pay for this little space.” 

“Man, even I don’t wanna know that. I try to forget about it until I have to pay it each month. I mean, I budget and shit so I’m never short, not yet at least, but at the same time...it’s nice pretending I don’t know that number,” Aten chuckled, and reached for the towel. 

“Let me,” Ahk swatted away his hand, moving the waistband of Aten’s sweatpants so he could clean him. “You sit there and rest.” 

“Tired of resting.” 

“You’ve been sick what, one day? And you’re sick of resting already?” he teased as he used the same towel to clean himself, enjoying the way Aten’s eyes trailed down as he slipped his sweatpants nearly off his hips. 

“Sick of being sick, sick of resting. And we should change, pants at least, or we’ll both feel gross in the morning. Fourth drawer has all my lazy clothes in it.” 

The hamper for towels was set right by the hamper for clothes, just before the door of the bedroom, and Ahk tossed the towel in before searching the drawer. 

“Oh...my darling,” he giggled as he pulled one of the few Ahkmenrah-branded items from the drawer. A pair of sweatpants bearing a tablet pattern, to be specific. “This is adorable.” 

“Hey, they said that money from the sale of those goes to maintaining your exhibit. I couldn’t not get them,” Aten replied. “And I bet you’d look cute in them.” 

He changed with a smirk while Aten watched, then tossed a pair of clean grey sweatpants over to him.

The dirty ones didn’t quite make it to the hamper, but neither of them cared. He actually felt tired, of all things, and it was all the more wonderful a feeling because it came with falling asleep beside Aten, in the dark of his tiny bedroom. 

He hadn’t even thought of tomorrow’s plans, and he didn’t want to. It might come too soon then, and before he knew it he’d have to be back at the museum. 

For now, it was just them, the dark, and the softness and warmth of the sheets and comforter, as he slept, truly slept, for the first time in thousands of years. 

[linphd]

endeavor x singer!reader | scandal

enji todoroki x reader

female reader

A huge scandal is exposed all over TV shows and magazines when Endeavor is seen with a more and more famous singer.

no warning

idk why but I imagine the reader like Lana Del Rey sksksl

''(Y/N) has been seen going out of a dinner with the one and only Endeavor, dressed as a civilian !'' It was all over the magazines too ; (Y/N) wasn't dress as fancy as she's used too, and Endeavor was still recognizable as well even with civilian clothes.

          Once the singer was signing autographs, and of course, paparazzis were there. ''(Y/N), can you tell us what's your relationship with Endeavor ?'' She smiled at the question, still focused on her signing. ''Ask him'' was all she answered before walking away.

         There was also this time, during an interview. The TV host asked her who her favorite hero was. Instantly, someone in the public yelled ''Endeavor !''. She only chuckled, but didn't react much more. ''I won't say his name, because he's an underground hero and doesn't want to be in the spotlight, and everything I say becomes a fucking scandal.'' The public laughed, even if they could hear someone ask ''Have you slept with him too ?''.

        ''Enji, I've told you. Of course we weren't going to be discreet, you're the number one hero !'' The man rolled his eyes, before answering. ''Still, I don't understand why they're so scandalized about it. We're dating, so what ? And why do you never say anything about it ? -I don't wanna share my private life ! And we weren't even fully dating yet ! I'm not even that famous, it's just your influence.''

          Endeavor chuckled at her last sentence. Then, he walked to her to hug her back, as she was cooking. ''So, how are we going to officialize it ?'' He asked, resting his chin on her head. ''Be in a video with me. The song was written way before I've met you, but I don't know, people will just talk about the video and say that we concluded and stop about the dirty innuendos and questions.''

         The man nodded, hesitantly. ''They will comment the fact that I'm much younger than you, though.'' He released her to sit on his chair when she said that. ''People always say shit anyway. Why do they care ? And I'm the number one hero, I'm the symbol of peace now, they won't dare to say anything.''

         He agreed on the video anyway, and life was going on. Also, there was a dinner organized for heroes at Yuei. ''(Y/N), I need you to accompany me.'' She raised an eyebrow. ''Ooooh, that's going to make people talk.'' He laughed at her remark but then frowned. ''Is your favorite hero going to be there ? You know those who are going to the dinner, right ? I told you already. -Yes, Eraserhead will be there.''

           The man furrowed his eyebrows at the name. ''I'm not your favorite hero. Big mistake. -It could've been worst, I could've said All Might.'' He groaned. ''You're going to be punished tonight, don't worry about it. But continue, continue, the madder you make me, the harder it will be tonight.''

            She giggled and hit his shoulder, even though he surely didn't feel anything. (Y/N) didn't care about his previous marriage. The woman had agreed to have children until one of them had both quirks in exchange of money. The singer did care about the children though ; and even if it was weird that she was not much older than them, she actually became kind of friends with them. Except Shoto, but Endeavor himself wasn't sure if Shoto was even friends with his siblings.

      

           ''The video is Put me in a Movie. If they want scandal, they're going to have it.'' The man laughed at his girlfriend. ''Isn't that the song in which you say 'come on I know you like little girls' ? -YES ! That's why ! And people are going to think it's about you !'' She said, giggling. ''And who is it about ? -Some old men from the music industry. They give you some fame if you fuck with them. Those were gross so I didn't but I wrote the song instead.''

           Endeavor himself was scandalized by how she was. She thought that their relationship wasn't controversial enough ? Let's add the 'little girls' part to it ! Anyway, they ended up not actually shooting professionally ; (Y/N) wanted a home made video for this song, so she added some moments where she was with her man. Other scenes were her lipsypcing, putting on makeup, dancing...

          Endeavor's presence in the music video wasn't really strong since he just briefly appeared in some shots ; and since it was just a compilation of random videos, those moments between him and (Y/N) weren't really here to mean anything.

         2 years had passed. Endeavor and (Y/N) were still dating, and their relationship wasn't controversial anymore, even with the age gap. Natsuo became one of (Y/N)'s best friends, Fuyumi liked when she was in the Todorokis' house, and Shoto didn't mind her presence anymore.

          Once, paparazzis recorded (Y/N) signing autographs. ''Who is your favorite hero ?'' She smiled much more than last time, even though she was still signing. ''Endeavor'' she sang, before waving and waking away.

           However, like every stars, (Y/N) had a horrible breakdown moment. Scandals even though they weren't important in the first place, little things turned into controversies. That's how she arrived to a hero dinner, looking like she had been crying for days but managed to put makeup and style her hair to be pretty. But what everyone has remembered from this huge dinner was a moment the paparazzis have recorded.

         Indeed, Endeavor and (Y/N) kept their PDA very very low. Only her hugging his arm sometimes, or him wrapping an arm around her waist. That's why nobody had expected what happened. All the heroes invited had their hero costumes on, so of course, Endeavor had his flames on.

          He smiled a bit when he saw his girl arriving to the dinner. He grabbed her chin to see her face -and oh, she looked so sad. That's when he cupped her cheeks, his flames wrapping her to protect her, instead of being used as a beard and costume. He kissed her and then hugged her tightly, his flames dancing around her, careful not to hurt her.

        ''Enji.'' She said, so he could look down at her. ''People always say shit.'' He chuckled at that, which managed to make her crack a sad smile. He kissed her forehead a few times, before hugging her back. That became the front page of many magazines.

Put me in a Movie is a song by Lana Del Rey ! The lyrics I mentioned are the real ones from the song.

[mynamehan]

Crush Culture - Peter Parker imagine

A/N: Totally got inspired by the AMAZING song called Crush culture by Conan Grey (check him tf out if ya haven’t). 

warnings: none I think? minor swear words maybe. some angst but fluff mostly

word count: idk exactly but a bit on the longer side soz it’s worth it tho

paring: Peter Parker x Reader

summary: Your recent feelings towards Peter have been getting you down lately and when Valentine’s comes around, you feel yourself growing tired of it. Just as you plan on completely ditching your crush something unexpected happens.

.

Valentine’s Day.

A day most people viewed solemnly as a consumers trap. Even though you’d never actually had a proper valentine, you didn’t mind that other people did. Any day to celebrate kindness was a win in your eyes, and you had never had any problems with the slightly gimmicky day. At least, not until now. 

Recently, feelings for the shy, sweet and kinda nerdy guy most people recognized as Peter Parker had surfaced, which put you in quite an unfortunate position. It didn’t take a genius to notice how he felt about a certain Liz Allen, seeing the way his dreamy gaze always seemed to lock on her in the hallway. For an observant person like you it was glass clear, he had fallen head over heels for her. As if that wasn’t enough, you being good friends with Michelle and being Ned’s childhood friend landed you some pretty juicy inside information on Parker’s more private thoughts. 

Now, at Midtown High, Valentine’s Day wasn’t that big of a deal really, only a few decorations in hallways and the cafeteria were hung by members of the student council. A small contest involving guessing the right amount of Hershey’s Kisses in a large jar was an annual thing they arranged. To enter, you could either team up in two or go solo, and after carefully looking at the jar from all sorts of angles, you wrote down your name, class and guess. Last year, you and Michelle teamed up as a joke and ended up winning the entire jar of Hershey's, which you ended up sharing with Ned and Peter. This year though, you weren’t in the mood for sweets, really all you felt was bitterness.

I don’t care if I’m forever alone

I’m not falling for you

'Cause this baby is love-proof

You glanced over at Peter as he stood with Ned by his locker, nerding out over something and you pursed your lips in aggravation. Nope, you were not going to do this to yourself. Crushing on someone who isn’t interested in you is a bad move and also not a very healthy one. 

“Hey loser, why ya looking so cranky?” 

Michelle slammed herself into the locker next to yours, scrutinizing your facial expression. The bang she caused snapped you out of your stare but you continued furrowing your brows as you let your gaze fall on the darkness in your locker.

Crush culture makes me wanna spill my guts out

I know what you’re doing, tryna get me to pursue ya

Your eyes set on nothing in particular as Michelle gave you a light nudge in the side. “Dude, are you in a trance or som-“

“Michelle, I need you to distract me today.”

“What are you tal-“

“Just please.” 

Cutting her off, you subtly let your gaze wander over to the two boys again, feeling your heart flutter as Peter let out a giggle over something Ned said. “Take me somewhere or tell me weird stories, you’re full of those.”

“Oookay, um, I plan on stylishly tearing apart some clothes after school to make them more grungy and I guess I could need someone to help me-“

You slammed your locker shut, keeping your gaze on the sweater wearing boy before abruptly turning on your heel and grabbing onto MJ’s arm. “Great. Let’s go talk about that.”

Oh no, don’t look in their eyes, 'cause that’s how they get you

After lunch and another two periods of trying to completely ignore the fact that all you could think about was Peter, the bell rang signalling the end of class. Scrambling your books, pens and papers into your arms, you got up and quickly started making your way out of the classroom. You didn’t get very far though until you felt a light tap on your shoulder to which you turned around sharply. As your gaze locked on a set of far too familiar brown eyes, you felt the air go out of you. 

“Y-you dropped your, uh, your pen.” 

Peter held up the blue pen with a shy smile on his lips. 

“Hmm. Thanks.” You replied stiffly before turning to walk off but once again Peter stopped you. 

“Hey, uh, Y/N. Are-are you okay? You seem kind of upset…” 

Standing still in your spot, you closed your eyes and took a sharp breath. “I just, I’m not in the mood today, Peter.” 

Your voice dripped with bitterness which made Peter frown slightly. “Well, are you sure, you seem-“

“I’m fine.” You snapped, not looking back the slightest as you hurried away.

And no I don’t want your sympathy, all this love is suffocating

Just let me be sad and lonely

Throwing your books into your locker, you held onto the blue pen just a few seconds longer before throwing it in with the rest. Sighing deeply, you let your head rest against the locker. Why couldn’t you get the stupid crush out of your head? Resting your temple against the metal, you frowned slightly, feeling a mixture of sadness and frustration. 

Grabbing your calculus things and closing the locker you set off to go find MJ in the library where you had planned to meet up briefly before class. Passing by the doors to the cafeteria you couldn’t help but look at the table where Liz and another member of the student council were standing, managing the Hershey’s guessing contest. It was no wonder why Peter found her so attractive, hell, you were sure everybody did. Besides her looks, her all-around kindness and charisma were charming enough to win anyone over.

I don’t care what you’re saying, I don’t wanna participate in your game of manipulation

“Hey, Y/N! Wanna try for a kiss?” Liz’s preppy voice cut off your thoughts and you forced a smile. Walking up to her, you placed a strand of hair behind your ear, swallowing hard. 

“Hey, Liz.” You greeted, taking a look at the nicely decorated table with the jar. “Wow, looks great this year. Have you been here all day?” 

She nodded, giving you a beaming smile as she went on to talk about all the effort she and the others put into it. You couldn’t help but stare at the way her eyes lit up as she talked, which made you think of Peter’s eyes whenever he was excited. 

“Are you gonna compete? Defend your title as the reigning queen of Hershey’s?” The both of you giggled at the nickname she gave you, and after a deep sigh, you bit your lip and took the piece of paper Liz held out for you. 

Taking a close look at the jar of Hershey's you furrowed your brows as you tried to count them. Giving up after reaching 32 you shook your head lightly before scribbling down 68, adding a couple more thinking it couldn’t hurt. Handing back the pen and paper to Liz, she gave you a wink. 

“Good luck, Y/N. Oh, and don’t forget that the winner is revealed at 3:30.” You nodded and said goodbye to her thinking to yourself that you’d probably be well on your way to MJ’s by then. 

A sudden slam hit your body and almost made you lose your balance. A wave of rage boiled up in you and you swore to god that if the universe won’t stop putting you in situations like this, you’d lose all sense of hope. His warm eyes now had a worried and slightly scared look in them and you sighed heavily when you were once again face to face with them. 

“Oh my-my god, Y/N, shit, I-I’m so sorry. I didn’t, I wasn’t watching where I was going a-and suddenly you were there-“

Shut your damn mouth, you’re talking too loud

“It’s fine.” You averted your eyes and tried to push past him, but he caught you by your arm. 

“Hey, is everything okay with you Y/N..? You’ve been so off the entire day, actually a lot lately… Did I do something to upset you? Please t-tell me if I did something wrong because we all know I’m pretty clueless most of the time.”

“More like oblivious…” You muttered out, barely catching his attention. 

“W-what?”

You shook your head softly, dismissing his question. He kept his confused puppy eyes on you and eventually you dared to gaze up at them. Big mistake. 

“Y/N, you can talk to me, you know that. I-I know we maybe aren’t super tight friends. Y-yet! But, um, I’m totally here and up for, uh, for venting-“ He rambled on, worry lacing his stutters. 

You shook your head slowly, gaining solid eye contact with him. “I don’t, I don’t know how-” 

You sighed defeated, filling Peter with an unsettling feeling. His kind eyes bore into yours and you felt trapped in a corner. What the hell were you supposed to say? Confess? You opened and closed your mouth a couple times and pressed your eyes shut before giving him a sad smile. “I can’t.” 

Merely talking to him pained you. How could such a minor thing like having a crush make you feel like absolute garbage? You scurried away to the library only to see Ned sitting with MJ, making small talk. Slamming your book down as you sat next to MJ, you let your head fall to the table. 

“I am having a horrible day today. I feel like I’m being punished.” Your words were muffled by the book, but Ned’s sympathizing hand on your shoulder made you look up. 

Resting your chin on your hand, you managed to sit up just as Peter made his way into the room, cheeks pink and eyes bright. “I thought it would only be us two.” You hissed to MJ, to which she shrugged. 

And no one cares if you two made out

“Holy crap, guys, you won’t believe what just happened. I went up to Liz and we actually had a solid 5 minute conversation. She, a-and me!”

“That’s great, Peter!” Ned uttered excitedly. “Maybe you can ask her out later then?”

“I-I don’t know, may-maybe? I might talk to her as she reveals the Hershey’s winners. Tell her I’m really impressed with the set-up or something.”

You and MJ shared a slightly annoyed look before turning back to the boys. “Congrats, you actually had a conversation with a person. Color me impressed.” MJ muttered out in her normal manner.

Peter rolled his eyes before continuing to blabber on. You couldn’t help but feel sick hearing him talk so fondly of her and not you. 

“I’m gonna go home actually, I’m not feeling good. Sorry MJ but we’ll have to reschedule. Uh, good luck with Liz and everything, Peter. See ya, Ned.” With that you said goodbye to the trio, leaving them all pretty confounded. 

Making your way down the halls and to your locker as fast as you could, you practically ran to the nearest subway station. Locking your front door behind you, you went straight to your room, ignoring your dad’s confused question as to why you were home so early. He knew not to press you on the subject so he let you cool down for a while. Throwing yourself on your bed, you let out a whimper as you felt tears prick at your eyes as you lost track of time. Being too caught up in your thoughts and self-pity, you didn’t even hear the doorbell ring about 30 minutes later or the knock on your door. Suddenly a familiar figure creaked your door open and leaned against the frame. You caught glimpse of him in the corner of your eye and practically flew up into a sitting position. 

“Peter? What are you doing here?” You asked in utter confusion, furrowing your brows together.

He bit his lip gently as he took a step forward, revealing what he carried in his arms. The jar of Hershey’s. 

“Uh, we, both won. They called a tie.” His eyes flickered between you and the floor. His nervous stature almost made you feel nervous as well. 

“Oh, um. Well, thanks for coming here to tell me that. That’s very sweet of you.” He shrugged as you pursed your lips shut in the slightly awkward silence.

“Yeah, no, no problem at all. I-I was going to ask you if you wanted to share them o-over a movie or some-something?” Peter’s eyes met yours and you shook your head lightly, thinking you misheard him. 

“What?”

Peter’s cheeks instantly flushed, thinking you had rejected the offer. He scratched the back of his neck as he stuttered out a response. “W-we don’t have to, I-I just thoug-”

“No!” You exclaimed, a bit louder than you intended which took Peter by surprise as you got up on your feet. “No, of course Peter! I-I’d love that.” 

Putting some hair behind your ear, Peter offered you a shy smile. “G-great! Um, I-I’m free whenever really.”

Your smile grew as you took a few steps closer to him, taking the jar as he held it out to you. “Honestly, I thought you’d be busy, you know, taking Liz out or something...”

I’m sick of the kissing cult

Peter raised his brows momentarily before shaking his head. “Nah, she made it pretty clear that she was off limits, actually.” You gave him a confused look as he continued. “After revealing the winner, I went up to her to accept the prize and as we were chatting, some dude came and kissed her, so...” He shrugged and broke your eye contact.

“Oh, Peter, I’m so sorry... Well at least you have me as a back up.” Bumping your elbow on his arm in a jokingly matter, he looked up at you smiling.

“You’re not a back-up plan, Y/N.”

At a temporary loss for words, you chuckled as your heart fluttered. 

“I, uh, it would an honor to accompany the two-times reigning master actually. Celebrate our victory.” A hint of red creeped its way up Peter’s neck.

As a grin made its way to your lips, you took a small step closer, now seeing the small details of his beautiful brown eyes. “Can’t wait.”

[katlyn1948]

Codename: Chapter 9: Gendry

So side note before you read...I cross post this on AO3 and I literally just copy and paste over here so please excuse my notes...

Codename

Katlyn1948

Chapter Management

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Chapter 9: Chapter 9: Gendry

Summary:

Things finally happen.

Notes:

I am so so so so so sorry that this took forever for me to write! First, I've been super overworked at work and have little to no time to actually work on this. Second, I share a laptop with my mom and she goes to school so I hardly have it most of the time (I also have to password protect my docs because I don't need her reading what I wrote) and haven't been able to write. I try to work on it a bit during my lunch break, but what I wrote is NSFW and I don't really want my boss creeping up behind me while I'm writing smut, that would be very embarrassing. So I had a little free time today and decided to FINALLY get this out!! I am actually quite proud of this smut chapter, consider I literally never write it. Look, I am going to be upfront and personal, I've only ever had one sexual experience in my life and I was in college so...my inspiration comes from fellow fanfic writers. SOOOO with that being said, please excuse any parts of this chapter that may be incorrect? (Yes I ended it as a question because I honestly don't know). Anyway, ish will start to go down after this chapter. Like I know it is only DAY ONE into their vacay, but I'm about to TIME WARP this bitch. Also, that mean that the next chapter may be a little longer. I am aiming for around 4,000 words to wrap up FIVE DAYS of SEX and VACAY, we'll see. Anyway, I hope you do enjoy and for those of you who asked about An Unexpected Journey and when that will be updated...I honestly don't know. I sort of hit a road block with that one and will get to it when I get out of that road block. I hope to finish before the end of the year, but IDK, IDK. This note turned out longer than expected and I doubt that you all want to read 2,000 words of my nonsense, so without further ado, please enjoy this VERY SMUTTY chapter.

I borrowed a line out of one of my fave TV shows in this chapter. It is tweaked of course, to fit the story, but let's see who gets it! HINT: It airs on STARZ.

Chapter Text

Gendry wasn’t sure when they moved to the bed, but he was glad that they did. It allowed Arya a better vantage to properly suck his cock, although he was sure that she could get him off no matter the position. She wasn’t quick about pleasuring him and for that, he was grateful. The other women he had been with rushed when it came to him, leaving him less than disappointed, but with Arya, she knew how to take her time.

He watched her as she guided her small hands along his shaft, stroking it with a slight squeeze. The feeling was intoxicating and he was sure that he would come within seconds. The last thing he wanted to do was ejaculate prematurely like some silly schoolboy who couldn’t handle himself. It took every inch of his being to hold onto the amounting pressure bubbling from him.

He had to admit that she was good with her hands. They were soft and delicate, yet rough and fierce all at once. However, the best thing about Arya pleasing him is that she knew exactly what she was doing. It’s not as if Gendry had been with inexperienced women, they were just turned off by reciprocating the favor. He would spend countless minutes making sure that his lover was properly pleased, yet when it came to him, they either performed haphazardly or flat out refused. Trying to get his ex-girlfriend to participate was an all-out war and became not worth the trouble.

His thoughts were suddenly brought back to the petite brunette bobbing her head up and down his shaft. The sensation had jolted him and he was inches away from sputtering into her mouth. Her mouth was heaven and if he felt this way, but just her light sucks than he was sure to explode when her folds were tightly around him. He could hear the sounds from below as she sucked her way up his cock and over his wet tip, licking the pre-come away from his opening. It was sexy sight and he was sure that he grew harder than ever before.

She returned her mouth to his head and glided her lips down, stopping before his tip could reach the back of her throat. He could hear her let out a gargled gag, the sweet sound breaking that last walls of will he had remaining. With a visceral moan, he bucked his hips upward and spilled his seed into her mouth. She gulped his remnants, wiping away was little seed escaped with the back of her hand.

Gendry watched as she crawled up the bed and plopped beside him, a glowing expression present on her face.

“That was…wow.” He said as he regained some of his composure.

Arya smiled, “Why thank you, sir. You don’t do half bad yourself.”

“Do you know how hard it was for me not to explode the moment your hands touched me? Pretty fucking hard.” He gasped as he engulfed her into his arms.

“What can I say? I have natural talent.” She teased.

Gendry chuckled and placed a light kiss on her lips. He could tell that she was exhausted and if he was being honest, so was he. He wasn’t sure if it were the drinks or the sheer force of their heated session that had drained his body, but he was sure that he could not lift his tired head from the soft pillow without struggle. He glanced down at the naked form beside him and noticed that, while lost in thought; Arya had silently fallen asleep, still wrapped up in his arms.

He began to study her features then; how her hair had soft waves that cascaded down to her shoulders or how vibrant her gray eyes had been. He even noticed the number of deep scars that scattered her lower abdomen and couldn’t help but wonder the story behind them.

Not once in his life had he been this captivated by a woman. She had only glanced at him from a distance and immediately reeled him into her intoxicating mind. He hated that they only had a short time together, but he was sure to make the most of it.

As he watched her sleep, he could feel himself become drowsy with exhaustion. Their romp, even if they hadn’t truly fucked, had taken most of his energy. He was delightfully surprised that a woman of her stature could keep up with his vigorous lust. He had truly found his match and the thanked the gods for finding him such a rare woman, too bad she would be out of his life in just a few short days.

He didn’t remember falling asleep, but when he woke, he noticed that Arya was no longer in his arms but rather perched on his lap, fully naked, circling her hips in such a way that made him groan with pleasure.

“You fell asleep on me, good sir.” She teased as she grinded her hips against his.

Gendry struggled to get the words out of his mouth, “You fell asleep first.”

She leaned down and placed a small peck onto his lips, “Then punish me for doing such a horrible thing.”

He instantly grew hard and he couldn’t stop his hands from moving to her hips, locking her in place. It was a sight to see her on top of him, and as much as he wanted nothing more than to have her beneath him, slamming his cock into her dripping pussy, he enjoyed the illustrious show she was providing.

He could feel her folds slide against his throbbing cock, getting it slick with her wetness. Each pass made him grip her hips harder, and soon he would no longer be able to stand not being inside of her. She teased him a few more times before slowly lowering herself over him.

And Gods it felt like he had died and been brought back to life.

He could feel her walls squeeze against his tender member and he was sure that if she shifted just slightly, he would come almost instantly. She was tight and he could see the slight discomfort on her face. In their earlier throes of passion, she had stated that she was by no means a virgin, but Gendry was sure that he may have been the largest man she had taken.

Concerned for her wellbeing, he asked, “Are you alright? Would you like to stop?”

She opened her eyes suddenly and shook her head with a force, “No! I just need a minute to…adjust. I haven’t been with a man in nearly a year and I certainly haven’t been with a man of your size.”

A smug smile creeped onto his lips, “Well, I’m happy to offer you such new experiences.”

She scoffed and slapped him across the arm, causing her to shift on his shaft. The sensation sent both into instant pleasure.

He steadied his grip on her hips and guided her up before slamming her back down atop him. She screamed in ecstasy and he gritted his teeth to prevent a moan to escape his lips. Up and down, she rode him, and he marveled at the sight. He grabbed ahold of her breast, massaging them as she bucked her hips forward. He could tell she was about to have her release, as he felt her walls clench tight around him. Arya screamed his name and collapsed across his chest, huffing deep breathes.

“Wow.” She breathed.

He nodded, trying to catch his own breath, but he knew that they were no where near finished. She was able to get her release and he wanted nothing more than to get his, all while giving her a few more along the way.

He encircled his arms around her and swiftly turned, pinning her beneath him. He pulled her arms above her head and held them in place with one of his own, while the other creeped to her slick folds. He instantly found the nub he was looking for and flicked it a few times, causing her to buck her hips.

“Stop teasing.” She huffed.

“Oh, I am returning the favor.” He grinned.

In on motion, his still hard cock slammed deep within her.

“Fuck!” She screamed, only adding to his hunger.

He thrust harder and faster, bringing her to the edge of no return. For several minutes he did nothing but pleasure the best way he new how; with the added sensation of him rubbing that sweet pearl, she was withering in complete euphoria.

Gendry soon felt his own release coming. He wanted nothing more than to spill inside her; to watch his hard work seep out of her dripping flower, but despite the fact they were fucking like mares in heat, he still didn’t know her and didn’t want to run the risk of doing something stupid.

With a few more thrust and his release nearly there, he began to pull out, but was quickly stopped by her raspy voice, “No, don’t. I want to feel you. All of you.”

He needed no more invitation, so with a low gruntled moan, he released his seed inside of her. He could feel her body gladly except. They were truly spent, so much so that his softening member was still inside of her. He hardly had the energy to pull out, but he was able to muster a bit to do so.

There they laid in each other’s arms, with a light layer of sweat trickling their skin.

Gendry wiped the hair sticking to Arya’s face behind her ear and placed a soft kiss on her lips.

“I think I am thoroughly spent.” He managed to get out.

She nodded and snuggled her face into the crook of his neck, “I’ve never had sex like that before; it was like I had mounted a bull. Gods, what have I gotten myself into?”

Gendry chuckled at the inclination. If only she knew exactly what he did for a living and what they called him. “More like, who have I gotten myself into. At least you don’t have any bite marks. I could have sworn I felt a little nibble when I was plowing into you.”

“When you bed a wolf, you should expect to get bit.” She said with a smile. Gendry could only laugh at the remark. She was indeed a wolf, and that he had to be weary off.

“So, you’re a wolf then?”

“Hmm, something like that.”

[oneangryscorpion]

Speaking of AUs...

I was recently inspired by a few older pictures the dear @yoel-o-fellow drew of a young Marvin and an even younger Jacob... and I thought of how crazy different things could be if the events leading up to Marvin’s departure were ever so slightly different. Little Jacob is overwhelmed at the thought of losing his older brother, so he snitches him off to their parents. Be warned people, this is gonna get dark.

AU where tiny 5-6yo Jacob couldn't handle the fact that Marvin planned to leave, so he spilled the beans about the scheme during dinner one evening. This infuriated their parents, and they demanded to know if it was true. Marvin, fearing what would become of him if he confirmed, denied. Jacob had been getting in trouble for his recent habit of telling childish fibs. And... well, we all know how anything that could even slightly be considered misbehavior was dealt with in that house.  His father, who had had a bit too much to drink, was boiling. "What have we told you about lyin’?" Papa Niccals growled. Jacob objecting only angered him more. He grew so rageful that he seized the boy... and strangled him to death. Marvin tried to stop him, but Mama Niccals, who was also a bit intoxicated, slapped him and made him sit back down, telling him to let his father finish punishing his brother. When it was over, reality hit Papa Niccals like a wave, but not because he just killed his youngest. His mind raced over what would happen to HIM if anyone found out. Marvin, tears streaming down his face, dared not make a sound (though tiny whimpers escaped without his control). His mother blinked, and then told him to go to his room. He wept silently in the dark of he and his young brother's shared bedroom until he fell asleep. Meanwhile, Papa Niccals sat at the table with his head in his hands while Mama Niccals paced around the dining room, desperately trying to think of a way out of this. The minutes ticked away as Mama grew more and more freaked out. Papa Niccals suggested they dispose of the body in a nasty way, but Mama refused. Her eyes watered as she silently reminded him that it is their little boy. She briefly thought of Marvin and how he must have been feeling... and then she got an idea. The next morning, Marvin woke slowly. For a moment, he expected to sit up and see little Jacob still asleep in his bed. But then the heavy ache of loss made itself known once more as the horrible memories flood his brain. He wanted to cry, but instead he got up and headed downstairs. On his way down he heard strange voices. Entering the kitchen, he saw his mother and father speaking with an... officer of some kind. "Oh, Marvin. We were just coming to wake you," she said. "This is [idk this dude’s name isn’t important]. He's come to collect you." "C-collect me?" Marvin sputtered. "Mum, what's going on? Why?" "Oh, my sweet Marvin, you're delusional! How could it have come to this?" She began weeping... but Marvin knew how to tell when she was feigning sorrow. "Don't be stupid, boy. Look what yer doin’ to yer mother," Papa Niccals growled. The stranger approached. "It's okay, Marvin," the man said. "We're taking you somewhere where you -- and everyone else -- can be safe." Marvin began to protest, but two other men grabbed his arms. "I-I don't understand! Mum! Pop! What's happening?" "He must not recall! It's worse than we thought!" his mother wailed. The man stopped Marvin before he could say anything else. "Son, you're having trouble remembering," he said. "We're taking you for the murder of your brother."

Marvin was taken to an asylum in Staffordshire, where he was to serve his sentence. His LOVING parents made sure he was deemed mentally ill and would be sent to a hospital instead of prison. He WAS their son, AFTER ALL. His original sentence was seven years, and he would be released at twenty years of age. Eighteen at the earliest, if he proved to be rehabilitated. However, he extend his sentence more than once during his time there because of continuous insane claims of seeing the ghost of his young brother. Marvin spent well over twenty years in the institution, constantly being tortured and mistreated in the pursuit of curing a mental illness he didn't have. Being punished for a crime he didn't commit, but that he blamed himself for all the same. His parents never visited, though they originally promised they would at least once a week. No one ever visited. In 1971, yet another new doctor was assigned to Marv. This doctor would have been Sebastian's beloved, if things weren't the way they were.

Marvin didn't open up to her at first. He didn't open up to any of his doctors; at least not after he figured out that when he told the truth it earned him more time. But this doctor was different. Over the few months Marvin worked with her, she proved to be extremely kind and caring, and she seemed to believe his claims of a ghostly Jacob visiting him. Of course she didn't truly believe that he had seen such things, but she was doing her best to steer him to sanity.  She planned on slowly trying to convince him he wasn't really seeing the dead boy. Her mind drastically changed during one session. "I know that ye don't think little Jacob is real," he said quietly. "Of course I do," the doctor fibbed. "Lyin' is bad," Marvin grinned. "That's what Mum always said." She was silent. "Jacob says it's time to cut the shit," Marvin continued. She laughed nervously. "What do you mean, Marv?" "He says ‘e wants ye to know that ‘e really is here. Says it's the only way we're gonna get outta here." The doctor blinked, and then decided it was time to call it a day with their session. She rose and turned to leave, bidding him a good afternoon. "Jacob says he likes yer family," Marvin said suddenly. She stopped. "He says there are four of ye, just like our family. 'E thinks it's pretty neat." The doctor turned to the man. "You have to stop this, Marvin. If you keep this up, they're never going to let you out of here." She went on to explain to Marvin that there was no possible way Jacob was there, and that she only had a family of three: herself, her husband, and her daughter. "Naw, Jacob says there's another of ye. Said, ‘'E knew death before 'e ever knew life,’" he quoted in a ghostly mimic. He chuckled and shook his head. “It’s probably nuthin. Jacob always was dramatic.” But she was frozen. A few years prior, the doctor was to have another child, but she had a miscarriage three months into her pregnancy. It was something that, save those of the hospital that treated the tragedy, only she and her husband new about. She wept and apologized to Marvin for ever doubting him.

She plotted with Marvin to help him escape the asylum. She said that she'd get him out the gates, but she would have to alert the guards of his disappearance after a small head start. Marvin was fearful, but he knew it was his only chance at freedom. In the dead of night, the doctor secretly lead Marvin to the outside and released him. He thanked her and said goodbye, and he ran. It wasn't long before they came after him. He had nowhere to go, and he had no knowledge whatsoever of the outside world but… he had one goal in mind. Once it was completed, it didn't matter if they caught him or not. After a few days of no luck, the asylum sort of gave up on finding Marvin.

A week after his disappearance, the police department of Stoke responded to a distress call from the elderly Niccals residence. When they arrived, they found Mr. and Mrs. Niccals' dead bodies lying in different places in the house. Both Mama and Papa Niccals had been strangled to death. Their killer was nowhere to be found.

[whatiswhump]

Bucky Alternative Civil War

This takes place right after they capture Bucky in Civil War, an alternative version if he had been sent to an American psych facility. Sorry it’s super long but idk how to split it up and do it justice.

-

“What’s going to happen to him?” “He’s going to be sent to an American psych facility where they will evaluate him. Steve, he doesn’t even know who he is. How can he trust you when nothing anyone has told him for the last 60 years was true?”

-

The case... or containment unit? They were keeping him in was unpleasant but nothing compared to what he knew- or he thought he knew. These electrical charges periodically went through him, while he could feel it in his jaw, hair, teeth, toes… it was worst in his arm. They were clearly meant to render him- and his arm- incapable. They didn’t feed him, not that he noticed nor cared, they didn’t personally address him either, not that he cared about that either. Really, this was more or less the drill he already knew. He was already retreating back into the depths of himself. He had new masters, he didn’t know much but he did know how this went. Even if they said they were the good guys, first the Russians, then Hydra…. Every bureaucracy was capable of whatever it took to accomplish their mission. Bucky didn’t know what they wanted with the soldier yet, but he knew that they were going to get it, regardless of what he wanted. So he let them strap him into this box because he was never going to win. He let them take him wherever they wanted to take him. They didn’t tell him- all as well he supposed, it’s not like he had any effect over it. He tried to sleep or feign sleep whenever possible, squeezing his eyes closed. He could feel the stares, the fear, the fascination, the disgust, the superiority. No matter how accustomed he had become to being gazed at- no privacy whatsoever, it was the one thing that still bothered him the most. The way they looked at him- as a thing to be evaluated. He was a rabid animal- one most would like to put down- but the few were intelligent enough to realize he may have use yet. Those few were the ones that scared him.

There was a plane at one point. He knew that. There were trucks, on freshly paved road. And then finally a stronger volt of electricity and blackness.

He woke up slowly, very slowly. He waited for the soldiers to lift him out of the cryo tank. Who was the newest target? Not that it mattered.

But wait, he wasn’t in cryo? The cold he felt was a floor.. A concrete floor. Why was he on the floor? The details came at an excruciatingly slow speed. He forced his eyes open, to his relief it was dim- he had always hated to wake up to bright lights- how did he know that?

He was curled closely into his side. He wore only a thin hospital gown. He was in a ten by ten room, concrete, one extremely reinforced window in the steel door. His mind flickered back to a Hydra holding cell- where they kept him if missions were short enough times in between to not go back into cryo. But something told him this wasn’t Hydra... But he couldn’t remember what. He tried sitting up but only managed partially against the wall- every muscle in his body ached. This is when he noticed an addition to his metal arm- a disc, a slightly different color but slim and unobtrusive. What was it? With his other hand, he tried to see if it would click off, it didn’t. Maybe it needed to be pulled off? A shock started in his fingertips and traveled and then black.

When he woke up again, he didn’t remember. He tried the same course of action with the disk. His handlers thought that he was being impudent and rebellious. He needed more sedation.

When he woke again, he didn’t remember, but this horrible sluggishness arrested his movements and thoughts more than the previous confusion and soreness. He couldn’t move from his side on the floor. He couldn’t figure out what it was but it reminded him of something unspeakable, some kind of mental anguish that couldn’t be described. He noticed the disk and did not know what it was but he knew it was bad, he knew to be afraid of it. He began to cry. Quietly at first but he began to forget himself and sob, he couldn’t control it. He didn’t know how long he had been heaving and panicking on the floor but at one point there was a buzzing and a click and he knew they were coming in to get him and true panic set in. But he couldn’t control his limbs- not well enough, they were too heavy and lumbering. So he shrank as much as he could into the corner, sobbing harder, trying to brace himself. They were going to take him. They were going put him back into the halo and they were going to make him do unspeakable things.

But instead of dragging him off the floor the hands held him down. There was just a prick of a needle and a slow fading of consciousness, like falling beneath the waves of an ocean. He drowned in the mess of his tears.

But he woke again. But he wasn’t on the floor, he was in a bed. When was the last time he was in a bed? Never? He couldn’t be certain but he couldn’t think of a time when anyone had ever put him in one. He either slept on the floor, the table or was put in the cryo chamber. But he knew this wasn’t the way beds were supposed to be- he was strapped in. Not that he was surprised. When was he not restrained? The answer to that was when they wanted him to kill someone.

“Sergeant Barnes?”

He jolted, he hadn’t realized there was someone else in the room. Why was that name familiar? One of his handlers perhaps- one long dead from many cryo sessions and wipes ago?

His mind was foggy, frustratingly slow, how did they expect to send him on a mission when he was like this? He couldn’t make tactical decisions in this state. But then he realized. Oh god. They were doing more experiments, they didn’t need him in working order this time. Where was the Nurse? He thought she said they wouldn’t experiment on him anymore. Was the Nurse gone? He had a vague recollection that maybe she had left. But he didn’t know. He didn’t know anything.

“Sergeant Barnes, are you with us?”

His eyes landed on a man sitting two and a half feet away from the bed in a chair. A doctor or a scientist? Or both? He was wearing his coat and a clipboard.

He nodded because the question was clearly directed at him.

“Good, you were pretty touch and go for a while there.”

He just stared back, not comprehending that the doctor was attempting to engage in a conversation, they rarely talked to him. If they did, it was to gauge pain or sensations or if with a handler for a mission report. Short questions that expected shorter responses. And rarely in English. It disrupted his programming, he didn’t know why but they avoided English.

“Okay, well let’s start with this, would you prefer my staff and I address you as Sergeant Barnes or James? Which makes you more comfortable?”

He hesitated to speak, knowing that it was not normal protocol, he vaguely remembered a punishment may be the last time he had spoken? He was the Asset? Or the soldier? He didn’t have a name. But at last, when it seemed that the doctor was truly expecting a response, he said, “Who is Sergeant Barnes?”

The doctor looked back at his clipboard, “We were told that you remembered parts of your past...”

He did? Well- he thought he did? Maybe?

“Well, then we will rewind further. Your name is Sergeant James Barnes. Do you know where you are?”

He shook his head no, preferring that to using his voice.  

“You are a supermax security military psychiatric facility in the United States of America. You are here to be evaluated and to receive care.”

That didn’t seem right. He was lying. What use for they have for the soldier here? Was he undercover perhaps?

“James, we are here to help you. But that is difficult for us to do if you do not cooperate. So your bionic arm has been adjusted- with that disk- so that it is normal strength, if you try to pull it off, you will be shocked. Additionally, you are on a course of sedatives, which is why you may be feeling a little odd…. It is to reduce your strength to keep yourself and my staff safe. As well as your panic attacks under control.”

“Panic attacks?” It slipped out before he even knew he had spoken, his voice was sore from disuse.

“Yes James, you have been in our facility for two months but this is our first real conversation. You have been unreachable, either sobbing and hyperventilating or distant and nonresponsive. It did not help that you kept attempting to remove the disk. But there will be no more of that. Will you cooperate now?”

He nodded yes. Did they realize that he would do anything he said? It was in his programming. Maybe they were just testing him? The way Pierce had?

“Okay then let’s start with these.”

Where had that other man come from so suddenly? Had he always been there? The second man in white held a paper cup of pills in one hand and a plastic cup of water in the other. He was bringing them to him. The man’s hand was moving faster than he could track suddenly they were hovering right in front of his face? He felt dizzy. There was another set of hands, where had those come from? They were forcing his mouth open, he didn’t resist. Why would he? The cocktail of pills was tipped into his mouth and his forehead was forced back so that they went to the back of his throat and he swallowed as they held his jaw closed. “Good job, well done James.” The doctor that had not introduced himself said somewhere out of his periphery.

Then things faded again, back below the waves.

Light, subtle.

Something soft? A blanket.

Exhaustion.  Food? No.

No food.

Hands. Grabbing at him. Restraints. Water? Shower. Strong deft hands scrub him. He can only lean against the tile wall his hands are secured to. Too tired. Strong hands guide him to step into thin cotton pants.

He is back in a room alone. Food? No.  Pills? Strong hands. Sleep.

Food? No.

Chair. He is tied down to it. Like Hydra. Like Hydra chair. Where are the scientists? Where is the handler? Only men in white. Something is being forced down his nose.

“You need to eat James.” He hears far away.

No eating. Too tired.

Back to room.

Dreams, terrible dreams, they force him, he has no choice. He fought and he fought and he fought but he cannot win. He completes his mission. The family is dead. Quickly and quietly. Then they scrub the blood off his hands and put him back away.

He is awake, he is screaming. There are hands on him. There is a jacket with sleeves with no ends. There is a prick. He lays there comforted by his arms forced around himself. He feels warm and empty. He does not know who he is.

He wakes up. Pills? Good boy. Get some more sleep.

Food? No. James, we have no other choice.

Bright lights. Table. Restraints. Hydra? He screams. Begs them to stop. They ignore him. He screams louder. He tries to break free. Not again, no more blood. Then a needle, the ocean swallows him again.

He doesn’t remember waking up. James, be a good boy.

Who is James? James needs to swallow his pills. Instead, he swallows James’ pills.

A door unlatches. Footsteps towards him. He shrinks to the wall. Please don’t make me. Please, no more blood. He doesn’t want to. He doesn’t want to. Strong hands. He lashes out. He won’t. He won’t go. Don’t make him. He lashes out again. Then no hands. Open door? He ventures through. A hall? He begins to run. To where he doesn’t know. He runs. There are alarms. They aren’t in his head. They’re loud, too loud. He needs to get away from the alarms. He comes to a door, it’s locked. He breaks the lock. He keeps going. He breaks another lock. He is outside? There are fences. He is scared. There are people. They have guns. They are all yelling. He falters and falls and gets up to run in the other direction. There are people on the other side. He stops. He tries the other direction. They are all yelling. There are so many guns. He falls and feels the biting snow. He begins to sob. He doesn’t know why they are doing this. This is the way it’s always been. It always ends in a fight. They are yelling but he can’t understand them. He begs no. He doesn’t know what he is begging for. Then there are tasers. He convulses in their grips. His teeth bite through his tongue. It will grow back. His tears are hot. Then the tasers are gone. There are hands on him, strong, too rough. There are restraints. He is forced deeper into the snow. Is he wearing clothing? No, he doesn’t think so. Something around his neck. He is being dragged. His head lolls. Please no more, don’t make him. No more blood. Please.

He wakes strapped down. Everything hurts. He cries. He can’t stop. There are hands on him. He doesn’t care. Everything goes black.

He wakes again. He is numb. He cries. He can’t stop. Why is he crying? He doesn’t know. More hands.

He dreams so much that he doesn’t know when he is awake.

He wakes? “James, that was quite the escape a few days ago.” The man in a white coat says. He knows this man.

Snow, he remembers snow. Outside. He was outside. He runs cold when he remembers the guns, the yelling, the tasers.

“James, that was unacceptable behavior. You are lucky they didn’t shoot you.”

He has been shot before. Lots of times. But he is still here. Why is he still here? But this time he doesn’t think he meant to do what he did?

“James this is your home now. You need to cooperate. If you keep hurting our staff like you did, things will get much much worse for you.”

He hurt someone?

“Do you understand what I am saying?”

He sees the man looking at him still and nods.

“Good. Something to help you understand is your new behavioral collar. If you behave, we won’t need to use it all. We feel we have no choice but to use it since you are so unstable and dangerous to my staff. We cannot risk another day like our most recent.”

He paused, maybe he expected a response from the soldier.

“Well anyway, if your behavior needs to be corrected, a small shock will be administered from the device to encourage you. Do you understand?”

Yes, he did understand this. With his gaze far away he nodded minutely.

“Dr. Ward, can I talk with you more about Sergeant Barnes?” The younger doctor, trotted a couple of steps down the hall to catch up with his colleague.

“Of course, we can go ahead and step into my office. What seems to be the matter?”

“Well, sir, I don’t know if our current action of treatment is getting through to him. We know that Hydra completely hard-wired him into what he is now and as a result he seems to be so confused. I’ve only spent limited time observing him but that combined with the notes, I don’t know if he even knows how to be human. He can’t dress or bathe himself. He doesn’t ever want to eat but he also willingly takes his medication every time. When he is left alone he seems to forget himself and zone out completely if he isn’t sobbing afraid of and overwhelmed by his own emotions. Sometimes I think if he were left on the floor, he wouldn’t move until someone lifted him from it. I think Hydra made him completely dependent so that he could not run away. He has no idea how to process things if people don’t tell him how to and even then he doesn’t seem to understand or remember much-”

“Well, Doctor, if you seem to know so much from your limited observations then how do you suggest we continue?”

“Um. Well I think the first step would be to lessen his sedation and take off the behavioral device, he has been trained how to behave almost his entire life, I’m not sure if this would be an improvement. He also needs to be able to form proper thoughts if he is going to start healing, he can’t do that with what he’s on.”

“Dr. Hall, you are forgetting something very important. He is a trained assassin with super strength and a metal arm. He is one of our most dangerous patients. He might be clueless but he could just as easily be still under Hydra’s thumb. But... I agree with you in one respect, our current treatment plan is not working. I was hoping that by giving him time to adjust to his surroundings and let the medication take full effect that he would be in a place where we could reassess and go from there in a more gentle way but now I am beginning to think he requires a stronger approach.”

���Well, I wouldn’t be so sure-”

“Doctor, are you questioning my professional opinion? One with many more years of experience than your own?”

“No- no sir.”

“Very well, then I would appreciate your support in this. I was planning on starting a speech based therapy among other things and I was hoping that you would be the man for the job.”

“Yes, sir.”

[yoondoze]

playground escapades | n.jm

“it’s two in the morning, what are you doing here?” + “can i kiss you?” + jaemin 

pairing: na jaemin x reader

genre: pure unadulterated fluff uwu

word count: 1.7k

warnings: none

a/n: i got carried away so this is now a one-shot

You almost didn’t notice the way your phone on the nightstand lit up as you were too busy sulking in your bed.  However, instead of ignoring the glow, you made the decision to pick it up.

nana, 6:34 pm

we still on for tonight?

Upon reading the message, a shock of panic ran through your body. You had totally forgotten! Too caught up in drama with your family, your plans with Jaemin had completely slipped your mind.

you, 6:35pm

omfg i’m so sorry

i got grounded earlier because i failed my math test :( i can’t go out

nana, 6:37pm

what??

they GROUNDED you for a bad grade? wtf

you, 6:40pm

yeah, i know :(

nana, 6:42pm

when are you grounded til?

you, 6:43pm

for the next couple days, idk. when they do this i’ll usually wait four days before asking to go somewhere sooo

nana, 6:45pm

that’s absolutely unbelievable

is that even legal? that can’t be legal

that’s so unfair

You laughed to yourself at the texts he was sending through. You thought it was unfair, too, but there wasn’t much you could do about it besides face reality and put up with the punishment. He made it a bit better, though - it brought up one of your first smiles of the day.

you, 6:47pm

yeah, it is. but i’ll see you at school, at least. sorry i can’t go with you

nana, 6:48pm

not your fault. i’ll figure out something we can do, just wait ;)

The winky face had you tilting your head upon reading it. Wait? Wait for what?

you, 6:50pm

what does that mean?

nana, 6:50pm

just wait!! love u and see u soon <3

you, 6:50pm

...see you? love u too

Though you had no idea what the boy meant, you carried on with your night, setting down your phone before your parents could see you and take it away.

Clank.

You blinked at the sound of a small puttering sound echoing out in your room and turned over, tangling yourself in the warmth of your bedsheets.

Clank.

You buried yourself deeper in your covers to try to mask the noise.

Clank.

Frustrated, you reached for your pillow and folded around your head to shield your ears.

Clank.

You huffed, angrily climbing out of bed and treading over to your window. Ripping back the curtains, your heart nearly stopped when your eyes landed on the figure standing outside. You stumbled back in alarm, a gasp slipping from your mouth.

Then the figure waved. In the moonlight, you could make out a beaming smile - one awfully familiar to you. You sighed to yourself, pinching the bridge of your nose before flinging open the window, revealing your boyfriend with a cheeky simper laying comfortably on his face.

“Jaemin, it’s two in the fucking morning, what are you doing here?”

He chuckled. “I told you I’d see you soon, didn’t I?”

“I mean- yeah,” you sputtered, trying to keep your voice down, “but I didn’t think you’d be knocking on my window in the middle of the night!”

He shrugged in response. “My spontaneity is a surprising trait to most.”

You deadpanned, looking at him with a tired but deathly stare, but he only smiled. “Again, why are you here?”

“Well you see,” he started, “I think it’s unfair that your parents grounded you, so I’m here to give you the dose of fun you need!”

“...And how will you do that?”

“I’m sneaking you out, obviously!”

You felt your face scrunch up. “What? No - Jaemin, I can’t leave. They’ll kill me if they find out.”

“So we just have to make sure they don’t find out,” he replied with a mischievous grin plastered on his face.

“C’mon, it’ll only be for a little bit. You’ll be back before the sun rises, I promise.”

To top it off, he brought out his puppy eyes and pushed out his bottom lip in a plump pout. It was something he knew you couldn’t resist - while Jaemin was one of the most push and shove kind of characters you knew, you were absolutely weak for his tactics.

“Alright. Where are we going?”

“I’ll tell you when you get out here. It’s kind of cold out so you should probably put on a jacket, and maybe some pants, too, unless you’re feeling frisky,” he teased, making your face flush hot.

You crept around your room carefully and slipped on some joggers and grabbed a sweatshirt hanging from the back of your door. You pulled it over your head and made your way back to the window and widened it open as far as it could go.

You were in good fortune that your bedroom was on the first floor - there was no way you’d be able to sneak out by trying to walk out of the back door due to the horrible squeakiness of the floorboards.

Carefully, you popped out the screen and laid it on the floor, then gently hooking your legs over the sill. Jaemin aided your maneuver with his hands on your sides, lowering you out slowly. Then, you plopped onto the ground behind the shrubs.

You wiped your hands on your thighs. “Okay, so now where are we going?”

“You’ll see when we get there,” he said simply.

“Na Jaemin,” you sighed, shaking your head, “you’ll be the death of me.”

He smirked. “But for now, I’m the life of you.”

He clasped his hand with yours and pulled you off, crouching down slightly behind the cover of foliage even though you were almost certain that there would be no one awake to spot you.

The walk wasn’t far, but there wasn’t much conversation between the two of you - only small giggles and shy smiles. It felt odd, but there wasn’t a sick feeling in your stomach like always when you were doing something like this. You hated not following the rules, you hated getting in trouble, and you certainly never snuck out... That is, until you met Jaemin.

At the same time, there was a rush of excitement that went against your desire to turn around and run home, to tuck yourself into bed before anyone found out. 

Soon, he stopped walking and spread his arms out, motioning to the land before him.

“...the park?” You asked.

“No, silly - the playground!”

You shook your head but followed after him when he took off toward the large structure in the center of the wood chips.

He skipped up the stairs happily, and you thought that the playground was the perfect place for a boy like Jaemin. Of course he’d want to take you to a place full of good memories and the purity of childhood youth, wouldn’t he? It was exactly what he embodied as a person.

You slid your hands along the colorful handrails as you climbed up, spinning some of the wheels and flipping the blocks along the way.

At the top of the slide was where Jaemin was perched, sitting crisscrossed in its dark green plastic mouth.

You sat down across from him and reached over for his hand, pulling it into your lap as you laced your fingers with his.

His head turned out to look over the open fields surrounding the small area of woodchips. Multiple overgrown baseball fields sat between the playground and the treeline, everything empty and bare. 

“Isn’t it amazing?” He asked, “you know, being here all alone.”

You nodded in agreement, looking through the slits of the slide out across the other equipment. This was the highest point of the park, and you could even see a few twinkling lights from town far away.

“I don’t know about you, but whenever I’m here at night, time doesn’t feel… real. It’s like we don’t even exist because no one’s here to see. It’s just us.”

“Yeah, I think I know what you mean,” you said, “It feels nice. It feels good. Like I belong in this place, where there’s no reality to return to... like I’m a kid again.”

The corners of his mouth tugged up. “Exactly.”

So close up, you could see how the soft moonlight shone on his face, putting a certain glow in his eyes that made you feel like you were falling in love all over again. When he drew you in with his gaze, you thought that maybe you were buried deep in those thoughts, like how he was in yours.

“Can I kiss you?”

The direct question had you hanging your head down in embarrassment. Jaemin was bold, you knew, but it never failed to catch you off guard. You bit your lip, trying to fight back a grin before coming back up with a small “yes.”

With your response, he immediately leaned in. His hand rushed up to its place on the side of your face, lips gently pushing against your own.

A delicate kiss to fit the delicacy of childhood memories, you supposed.

If you focused hard enough, let yourself go in the moment, you could be there again; Back to a time so pure and without worry. You could get lost in that place of innocence.

But then Jaemin was there again, bringing you back to reality. He was a reminder that the real world, the now world, was still good - your memories stayed with you always, both in a playground and out. You could grow up without leaving it behind. If Jaemin wasn’t living proof of that, then you didn’t know what was.

Giggles escaped his mouth when he pulled back, neck craning up to look at the stars above. You knew he was trying to hide a blush, but you wouldn’t tease him for it.

After letting out a large exhale, he prompted, “It’s getting late. Why don’t we get you home?”

You hummed quietly in thought. “I think…” you said, watching as his signature smirk began to rise on his face, knowing just what you were about to say, “that we should stay a little longer.”

[fictional-scenarios]

Oooooooooo could you write a sequel to Kuroo angst you poster recently??????

sure thing! -mod cassie

It took nearly two weeks for you to look at him, and about a month for you to start answering his texts. Though Kuroo knew exactly what he did and how it affected you, some other apathetic part of him felt as though you were drawing out a needless punishment. Sometimes in the later hours of the night he’d find himself entirely pissed off for how guilty you were making him feel, fingers itching to send you that mile long text that would start in a ‘sorry’ and end in a ‘grow up’. However once those nights passed and he saw you wandering to your class that anger would shrivel and beneath it that same regret would resurface, his pride once again making a show and urging him to turn the opposite direction.

The first time you finally gave him a half wave when he walked into the building his heart nearly flipped. It was just a wave and a half hearted one at that, but you were acknowledging him at least. He’d wave back in earnest and sometimes would even directly say ‘good morning’ but usually you never replied to them. When you finally came around and do did he, he had to bite back apologizing over and over again, fearful he’d scare you off. Instead he just waved to you whenever he could or offered a friendly smile whenever his hands were full, grateful you’ve return the gesture.

When you never answered his pathetic apology, he’d send you one about three days later, a stupid ‘hey, you alright?’ Unsurprisingly you didn’t answer that one either. So, when you finally did, he felt like he’d double over in his seat. Though the night was over and he was just getting ready to get up from studying and head to bed, he still felt his throat go dry at his phone lighting up, your name displaying over the screen.

‘hey’

He was so fast to respond it amazed him that he didn’t make any spelling errors, not that he’d checked at all when he hit send and then made his way under the covers. 

‘hey’

Your name lit up again, his phone vibrating and his breath leaving him.

‘do you have time to talk’

He almost replied with ‘anything for you’ but instead sent a simple, ‘yeah, sure, whats up’. He felt horrible in acting as though he had no idea what was going on, like he totally wasn’t expecting you to already be chewing his ass out for being such a hardass to you back after the game.

It took you a few moments to answer and in those long minutes Kuroo’s anxiety grew with every second. 

‘i just wanted to say i was sorry for ignoring you these past few weeks. i wish i had an excuse but i dont’

He couldn’t believe what he was seeing. Sure in the times where he’d get angry at you he’d imagine you apologizing but actually seeing it in front of his eyes made him feel even worse than before. He’d exploded on you for just trying to help, and even after that he was just as much in the wrong (if not more) for not manning up and apologizing right away. Instead he chose to give you the silent treatment as well.

‘it’s fine, really. im sorry too for being a dick and for saying all those things to you. i dont have an excuse either, i just hope you can forgive me’

Sometimes Kuroo wished he could sound more genuine as he read his reply, feeling like he was speaking way too casually to sound like he was as sorry as he was. He was afraid you would think he was just talking out of his ass, like he didn’t actually give a damn about how you felt and was just going with it. When you replied he was almost scared the only thing you’d had sent would be a big, fat, ‘no’, but it wasn’t.

‘i forgive you.’ 

Even though it was late and his mind felt fried from all the practice and studying, he still leaned his head back against the pillow, phone clutched to his chest while he grinned. A weight had been lifted off his shoulder and though he knew these messages wouldn’t solve everything it was the most relieving thing to see those words. You forgave him. As he brought his phone up to his face, squinting at the brightness, he smiled all over again and sighed at your answer before sending his own.

‘thank you, ___, seriously. that means a lot to me even if it doesn’t seem like it.’

His room was dark save for his screen illuminating, but he’d never felt so content in his whole life. He still had some guilt clinging to his shoulder, eating away at him slowly, but for the moment he truly felt like you two could finally start getting somewhere again. The fear of potentially ruining any chance of being with you greatly damaged a lot of Kuroo’s persona, so much so that even his teammates asked him occasionally if he was feeling alright. That ‘fateful’ night replayed in his mind over and over again, his head creating alternate pathways on what he could have, or should have, taken and where they could have led him. 

‘im glad it does. i miss you a lot tbh’

You sounded just as casual as he did and maybe that wasn’t a bad thing, since it made talking a lot easier than just spilling emotions and crying out ‘im sorry’s every few seconds. Kuroo stared at the ceiling, closing his tired eyes and smiling again.

‘i missed you too’

A few more minutes passed after his reply and you still hadn’t answered, and for some ungodly reason Kuroo feared he may have made things awkward, and once again he almost dreaded reading your message when his phone alerted him.

‘hey i know we havnt talked in awhile but do you maybe want to hang out sometime this week? if u dont wanna thats find i just think it would nice to catch up or something idk’

He actually laughed quietly, head tipping back again after reading your question. Even though the circumstances were less than desirable it was cute to him, and he was still smiling as he answered back.

‘that sound awesome, where do you wanna go?’

‘hows that one place by the corner store sound? i heard its good’

‘it sucks’

‘oh haha, how about that one we used to go to together a lot? i cant remember the name either oops’

Kuroo licked at his lips, remembering how often you two would eat out after he was out from practice. He didn’t like it too much but when you were there with him, it was his favorite. 

‘sounds great. we can catch up on stuff cant we?’

‘yeah’ 

You sent another right after.

‘like i said i really missed you. sorry ive been so mean :(’

His heart fluttered again as he typed away, hesitating before sending. 

‘its fine, really, i was the jerk. im just glad we’re talking again, and im also happy to be revisiting our place again. eating at our place is way more fun isnt it?’

‘haha, our place sounds about right.’

It felt good to be saying ‘our place’, it made him feel like you two were right back to being the close knit friends you always were, even if a lot of it was spent on him pining for you and wishing you felt the same way.

‘so its a date then?’

Kuroo nearly choked when he read your message, heart doing flips as he sat up and re-read your text to make sure he wasnt mistaking it on accident.

‘a date?’ He sent, hands nearly shaking. He definitely hadn’t misread your text, but it felt too good to be true. 

‘oh sorry, would you rather it not be? ig that makes sense given we havnt been talking… we can just hang out haha’

‘NO a date is fine. thats even better than just hanging out.” His entire body felt weightless, nearly feeling like he had whiplash from your sudden question and how lucky he had gotten. He was excited to be just conversing with you again but going on a date? Finally doing something he’d been dreaming of? Again, the context was less than desirable but he still beamed at the chance. 

‘alrighty then, i cant wait! ill see you at school tomorrow right kuroo? at our spot?’

Your spot being the tree a little outside the gates of school, the place where you’d met because he bumped into you while not paying attention since he was too busy harassing Kenma on not making too many friends despite it only being the first week of highschool. You were prepared to be hit and almost fell over, and would have hit the dirt if he hadn’t managed to grab onto your arm. It hurt and left a bruise but after that day you two became pretty close.

‘yeah, our spot.’

‘get some rest then, see you tomorrow (:!”

He sighed in delight, imaging seeing you tomorrow and thinking of all the things he could say to you. 

‘see you tomorrow, ___.’

Kuroo clicked his phone off when you didn’t answer back, probably heading to sleep with the same butterflies in your stomach. He wanted to feel mature and cool, but he couldn’t stop himself from flipping on his side and holding a pillow tight in his arms, body wrapping around it while he grinned into the plushness. 

Once again those scenarios started racing in his head but they weren’t an offspring of regret and what he could have done. Now, it was excitement, the things that he could and would do when he saw you the next morning.