#improbable scenarios

[sohannabarberaesque]

Meanwhile, in Seattle's coffee house Realkultur (thankfully, NOT Starbucks)

DICK DASTARDLY, rather irate as ever: Drat! and double drat! All I want is just a basic cup of coffee, and I've got all these options to choose from--espresso and macchiato and Americano and cappuccino and all that nonsense! ALL I JUST WANT IS A CUP OF BASIC-- [Whereupon an off-duty barrista, sensing where Dastardly are causing a scene detrimental to the peace, safety and good order of the establishment, drags Dastardly and his ne'er-do-well canine companion Muttley out of same, reinforced with the inevitable warning "--AND STAY OUT, IF YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOOD FOR YOU!!"] MUTTLEY: [Big-time snickering to the point of ROFLHAO hilarity at his master's expense] DICK DASTARDLY, with signs of evident menace and duress: MUTTLEY--!!! You had me kicked out of that coffee shop behind us just as I was trying to ask for a plain, simple, basic cup of coffee unadorned and uncomplicate-- [Whereupon Muttley goes into that show of letting go with a substantial discharge of canine flatus whose odoure is all the more evident, even being discerned as far as Colman Dock, Seattle's terminal for the Washington State Ferries; fortunately, no issues are discerned when it comes to vehicle or passenger loading.]

[undertalethingems]

dream i had last night that i will attempt to convey in text, even though i would like to draw it as a comic...

Sans, seated at a drum kit, plays the classic rimshot.

Sans plays a slightly more elaborate rimshot, adding an extra beat or two to the timeless phrase.

He plays a yet more elaborate variation, yet it's somehow still recognizable as a rimshot despite all the extra flourishes.

He plays an even more complex version, with lots of embellishments on every beat...

The variations continue, growing in complexity, until...

He plays incredibly, using a variety of percussion instruments with a level of skill that matches one Neil Peart, building up an unforgettable arrangement...

that all ends with a rimshot.

[animegirlmattmurdock]

I love you // …I love you. 

[andarthas-web]

Within the next 6 months, Trump will die of natural causes (a stroke probably). Vance will become president and going by his policies, it'll turn out he's an undercover leftist who has been planning to get where he is for decades. And he won't be half-bad at his job either. The GOP will pretend whatever he does was their plan all along for the most part, because that's easier than admitting they were duped.

[little-shop-of-stories]

Had a thought. What would happen if one day a case goes horribly wrong and Charles is seemingly erased from existence in front of Edwin? I feel he'd be frozen in place, staring at the last place he'd seen Charles ... and then slowly start to disappear himself. He might've been in hell for decades, got tortured by Esther's machine and seen Niko die in front of him, powerless to stop it. But this ... this pain eclipses all that came before and not even a soul as hardened as him could bare it.

[beeprich]

just know if IT 2017 and 2019 ever stops being available on streaming services I can recreate both films from memory in a one woman show I will perform for my it-uals for free

[hereforagoodtimenotalongone]

the closest bruce ever gets to being exposed as batman is a period where tiktok is filled with edits of bruce and batman to the song "emo boy" by ayesha erotica

the edits start as either bruce (early 20s, angsty phase) or batman (vague blurry clips that bruce allows to exist online) but once people start noticing the connection they start editing them both together

bruce attempts to have oracle remove them but she argues massive edits disappearing would be too suspicious (and she's right, gothamites are so down bad for their billionaire idiot-with-a-heart-of-gold and scary but ever devoted protector that they would riot if the videos got taken down)

eventually bruce gets asked about the edits in an interview and his attempts to cover accidentally prompts a resurgence in bruce wayne is batmans sugar daddy rumours

bruce is very tired

[cecoeur]

I hope Daniel walks into Aus GP 2025 as a guest of Jack Doohan with the world’s biggest fuck off chain and rings and short shorts now that he’s no longer bound to be wearing Hugo, and i hope he’s bronzed to the GODS and slutty about it too

I would love this so much because we know there are still folks on that team from daniel's renault days (and we know they stayed late in singapore to get to share a moment with him, which I could literally cry about all over again) and then Jack is his little Ricciardo Karts baby and it would be SO special. He would absolutely be full c*nt. Dripping in chains, showing off his chest hair, and looking damn FINE.

Now to be a party pooper, I don't think it will happen because I don't think daniel would want to pull focus from Jack at his first f1 race that also happens to be his first home race. I also would kind of be surprised if we see daniel at an F1 track even next year. I could see him at another motorsports event but probably not in the formula 1 sphere for a while. Obviously a lot can change between now and then but that's my current vibe on this guy i've never met and do not know in real life lol.

[collieii]

vash and wolfwood as hetero dudebros who also happen to be having gay sex every night is one of my favorite characterizations. which is why 98 is so funny

[lizasweetling]

Probably interdimensional communcations garble, not actually sexism, but definitely infuriating...

if they experience overall probability, not linear probability (meaning the likelihood of Agatha having the understanding she does including the inherent likelihood of Agatha's intellect itself versus just the likelihood of Agatha understanding when her genius is assumed) then that would mean that in [some overwhelming percentage] of their perception she did not understand, and since they are talking to all Agathas in this posit, they chose the most correct communication,

making this more of a 'talking to several people at once' communication error rather than the more annoying 'not listening when you speak' communication error

[gaymedievaldruid]

I'm about to write something fucking wild, this is going to be great

[matutito]

when i was 13 i used to daydream dan and phil would just appear at the place that im bored at and i would get to meet them etc.

i still do that but im 20 now

[vicompte-de-latarteaucoing]

Nothing to see here. Keep scrolling.

[transhitman]

My utilitarian take is that ethicists should all be beaten to death with a stick

[carolinanadeau]

I do live in fear unfortunately

[nerefee]

dreamt my cat had a uti again and now my brother texted me that she peed on clothes on my parents bedroom floor, she NEVER does things like that unless she has a uti my bby 😭🥺