#im trying to be a good person and not let my emotions thru...

[sensitivegoblin]

Vent

Tw SH, sucide

[greenunoreversecard]

OMG HI?! I HAD NO CLUE YOU TOOK REQUESTS AND WROTE FICS?? IM HERE FOR A REQUEST GREENY !!

anyway, my request is for husk x optimist!reader, like the reader is this person who tries to see the light in all the crappy situations hell throws at them and eventually just can’t take it anymore and goes down to husk’s bar and gets a drink (which is a rare occurrence for reader) and then just starts rambling on about how life is just awful for them and that it’s just so hard for them to push through and act like everything’s just fine and dandy? and husk helps em thru it and carries em to bed? :)

gn! or fem! reader is fine for this, whatever you want!! feel free to take some creative liberties with this haha i trust you!!

i can’t wait to see it!!

— mio 💕

jsjdowid I do!!! I also try and request on others pages to help spread the love :p

The Healers Broken Heart

->Husk x Gn! Reader

Youve always been know to rival Charlie's pep and optimism.

But it seems today just wasn't in your favor, was it?

Maybe it was sleeping through your alarm. Maybe it was seeing someone you'd rather leave in the past. Maybe it was the date itself. The reasoning isn't to important as you make your way through the doors of the hotel and beeline for the bar.

"Instead of a drink can you just hand me the fullest bottle of pink Whitney you have?"

Husk raises his eyebrow at you, before letting out a low whistle.

"Damn. Shit day?"

"Something like that."

"Well, angel drank the last of theWhitney, but i got everclear, and a couple flavored vodkas and some whiskeys, if any of those suit your fancy?" His voice low and gruff as he quietly lists the available alcohols.

"Fuck it, gimme the everclear"

He whistles lightly again, turning from the glass he was cleaning to the display behind him, grabbing the unopened bottle of everlcear and setting it in front of you.

He watches as you screw of the cap, and throw it back, chugging a good amount of the alcohol, unflinching.

"I was gunna ask if you want a chaser with that, but by the looks of it you don't." He pauses a moment, eyebrows still raised in shock as he watched you drink like a alchoholic of 30 years, before remembering himself and going back to the blank slate he normally keeps his face at.

"Wanna talk about it?" He treds carefully. But this question seems to hit the dam holding back the floodgates of emotions, and tears lightly prick you eyes so you take another large swig.

"Life fucking sucks, everything fucking sucks and I don't want to deal with it anymore." You go to take a third large swig, before his hands stop you.

"Maybe wait. Everclears stronger than a muthafucka, so give it a minute to set in, and then decide if you need more." He says, prying the bottle from your iron grip. "And when your ready, elaborate."

And so, after a moment, when you feel it start to set in, you do. You tell him all of your woes. Tears start streaming, at some point.

And at some point, Husk crossed the island between you two, and brought you head to his chest, gently stroking your hair and listening. Listening and caring. That's not something your particularly used to, So to speak.

And at some point, in your now drunken stupor. He dries your tears, assurance pouring from his lips like a waterfall, as he carries you up the stairs, and towards your room, setting you gently on the bed and helping you when you ask to change from jeans to sweat, always remaining ever the gentleman. He sets advil and a glass of water on your nightstand, before standing in front of where you lay, bleary eyed and lightly kisses your forehead.

And as you fall asleep, you realise. That maybe, just maybe, its ok to not be ok.

And maybe it's OK to cross some professional lines with the bartender.

Because in the end, you won't want have anyone but husk listen to you and care for you, and Carry you home.

Even the healers need to be healed.

----

A/N ending note: Hope this was OK, and hoped you liked it!! Thank you for requesting, i really liked it and enjoyed writting it<333 sorry if its short fiejfjks

[kroosluvr]

hi!! as a fellow royal trio-truther ive been ADORING and loving your posts so much <3 you mentioned that you've like mentally re-wired shusumi so i was curious if you had a list of head-canons for how they develop in the game/post-game!! Im super curious to hear (: also any head-canons for the akesumi dynamic would be great bc I hate how little the game developed them together !!!

OMGGGGGGGGG HAYYYYYYYYYY ok so. first. look at this (idr if i posted this here already but if i did look again heh..)

ok now ill actually talk under the cut

note that some of this is headcanon territory bc i just be frolicking at this point

some backstory i fell in love w sumi as soon as her art was revealed i was like omfg peak design PEAKKKKKK i love her so much so i was really excited abt her but i feel like there were so many loose ends w her confidant and namely her crush on protag sometimes doing her a disservice (it turned ppl off from her (understandable bc i also dislike when writers make a female character out to be dependent on a male character) but also made other ppl weird abt her in the same breath....... shivers. people who overly-romanticize/sexualize mentally ill characters (especially girls/women) freak me out sorry

anyway that put me off frm p5 fandom for a hot minute. BUT regardless. i think people often focus on like "shy cute sadgirl kouhai crush-on-protag" for her which on top of atlus's.......mediocre handling of her also does her character a disservice... shes so multilayered!! she houses such insane convoluted levels of distress and fear and anger and reluctance and most of all STUBBORNNESS. i think her headstrong personality is not really emphasized in fandom but i can totally see it (maybe its just me but).

ok moving on to my shsm delusions i think to turn sumire's canon crush on its head i want to make them doomed to never get together. i think 3rd semester is so tense and high-emotion that royal trio are so deeply intertwined w each other:

like they all are mildly-to-a-lot suicidal so they hold onto each other so tightly to make sure none of them spirals and does anything bad. i think in the end they just want the other two to be Okay, even if they themself doesn't. if the other two are ok, then it's all good.

ok back to shsm LMAO i think seeing their relationship as like an odd high-emotion situation makes sense. they love each other, obviously, and provide each other comfort, but the idea of a relationship slips thru their fingers like water. is that right...? is that how it is? like i said up there they just crumble under the weight of their own love. tldr theyre in no place to "date" each other........ but they have their "almost." they're inseparable, they love spending time with each other, but knowing in the back of their heads that it won't last, and they'll have to leave it be one day. "sometimes when i really love someone i leave them alone forever." peak shsm to me. "let's run away together - but what if it's not enough? what if all of this fear and sadness still stays? i take a man down to the river and he throws away his sadness but hes still left with his hands, he's still left with the river (paraphrased richard siken). peak shsm to me. i think they try to treat eachother so softly and gently that it fucks it all up, actually. peak shsm to me. it's not codependency in the sense that theyre not trying to save each other - they're just trying to salvage out some love from it all. all of these terrible things that happened: there's still love, right? there's still love. but the pain can't all be sifted out, and everything still hurts. but they still love. (they just don't date or even talk to each other much after graduating and i think they talk to akechi but to each other its suddenly COMPLICATED. i hate these guys)

ironically i think if you throw akechi in the mix it stabilizes out and i think shuakesumi could totally have a happy married ending. but shsm as a pair i dont see endgame for them. peak for me is that theyre in love and then they spend the rest of their lives trying to forget each other (they don't)

(If this sounds ridiculous and stupid im sorry. i just like shoving too-many-emotions onto my favs sometimes (a lot of the time))

IN REGARDS TO AKESUMI i think my latest 2 comics describe how i feel abt them pretty well!!! link 1 and link 2. actually i think akesumi's friendship is a great way for me to explore how i see/portray/feel about sumire, because i see them as way more similar than the game pays attention to. they're both stuck in their ways: sumire in her cowardice, hiding from the incident and refusing to move on, and akechi entrenched in his own traumas and feeling like he doesn't deserve more than that. their self-hatred manifests in two opposite ways but its very similar at the core. they both like. have no fucking clue what they're doing in terms of handling their pasts so that's why i think them working together to get around their own respective traumas is so fascinating: akechi is terrible at it, pushing sumire too far, but at the same time that perspective is something that she needs. meanwhile, her sensitive and observant personality shows akechi that like, you can have This too: a soft, good love. to have someone care about you unconditionally, so gently. you deserve that, too. yeah i can explode my head off now

i did not proofread this.

[lullabiesofalovesickangel]

i feel like all of my friends hate me, that no matter what i do i will always be the annoying one or the one that ppl want to make go away

i feel like everyone around me just wants me to suffer bcuz i dont do anything to help

i feel like a burden && no amount of reassurance rlly stops those thoughts when i get like this, bcuz ik that theres ppl that see me as a burden && wont tell me. ppl just lie to me ab all of this stuff

i feel like it would be so much easier for those around me if i just stopped being around bcuz i wouldnt be another mouth to feed, i wouldnt be taking so much && not being able to give back even if im unable to get a job

i feel like ppl will always see me as the annoying one that they hate sm but wont say they do bcuz they dont want to deal w me more than what they alr do

i dont believe ppl actually love me unless i can provide smth in turn && im struggling to do anything for myself let alone take care of pets too. i feel like if im not smth to use, or a stupid fucking doll or toy, then im worthless. if im not useful im not wanted

i rlly want it all to stop, sometimes it feels like i rlly would be better off dead so everyone else wouldnt have to deal w me && so they could freely talk shit ab me w/o me knowing that there's resentment ab me

im tired of living but if i even bring it up to others in the house, i have to console them or feel like i have no choice but to admit myself somewhere like thats actually going to help

i rlly am good for nothing when i cant do anything or provide money for a household that took me in, i just cause issues && make it ab me

im a shit person && ik that but idk how to combat that, i want to be perfect but it feels like i will always be reaching bcuz my best is always less than

i hate living but i also feel so guilty for feeling the way i do bcuz ik i have someone that loves me so much more than my brain will tell me but it feels like im failing them bcuz theyre going thru things && it's being ab me again

im not trying to make it ab me either bcuz i want them to be able to focus on themselves i just dont have anywhere to turn to bcuz im half expecting to not be put on meds or they not help the second i get them

&& ik some ppl will see how i feel && tell me im just guilt tripping && manipulating ppl around me so they have to feel bad for me && that just makes it sm worse, bcuz then i have to deal w the guilt that the way i can get my emotions out on smth personal is just me being an abusive asshole regardless of my struggles

idk what to do anymore

[nicegaai]

im attempting my fic reread today. im announcing this bc i will be liveblogging to keep my morale up, NOT THAT anyone cares but i personally need this, like ill only commit to do the thing if theres an imaginary audience holding me accountable. & i like to have fun :3

anyway. captains log, its a beautiful sunny july weekend. i just finished my morning coffee, and, i am dreading this so much. i dont like rereading my own writing but i shall get over it. ok here we go.

Þetta Reddast vagueblogged directors commentary edition

Ch 1:

*opens fic and starts convulsing immediately* god i wish i smoked weed rn. i cannot chill out ever for the life of me

My Mission For Today Is: to remember what plot threads I’ve left hanging so I can resolve this story properly. And also try n remember where the flow is going. I have the end plotted out, I just am a little lost … it’s been a while :-(

------------

Abrupt beginning!!!! I’m not mad because I have . I HAD. Almost no writing experience when I started this. it isn’t ideal but I refuse to be one of those fanfic writers that starts rewriting early chapters without finishing the last ones. Ive never seen one of those types actually finish a longfic. …I’d already rather yap than actually read LMAO AHH

Oh this is worse than I remember. thats cool that s great ok alright *coughs up blood*

"20 somethings" WOW I really did not know where I was going with this when I started huh

LKJSDLKSJDLGKGDJSLDGJK ??? Who authorized this. Who let me cook. What the hell

I could write this better now. I could edit this into something beautiful. <- devil on my shoulder

FORGOT I WAS MAKING RICE BRB

"generously offered nothing to the exchange." wait STOPPPP. I’m so funny

GRAMMAR ERROR DETECTED why is there two periods. I’ll be coming back to fix that …………………. :-(((

Fuck. This is a lot. Marge Simpson Hiding Her Face dot Png

Oh this is stupid this is gayyy this is fukcinnn . Who fucking did t his. What was wrong with me,. This is so good actually. what was i ONNNN. 

Im gonna throw up and I don’t know if thats like/. A complimentary thing or if im just cringing that hard . Im feeling emotions. I love my OTPs..OT3~5? I love them so so much

Ok as much as im like “eww bad writing” this is .. dare I say, rly good in places. Not to suck my own dick but maybe all hope isnt lost and imposter syndrome is an illusion

Grammar mistake #2. Goddddddd. they should ban me from the archive for this

EMILLLLL EMIL EMIL EMIL HIIIIII BABYYYY EMILLL I LOVE UUUU AWWHUUGHH everyone clap for my bewoved baby bruvver right FUCKING now

Urghhh gritting my teeth… Im fully expecting the flow of events to start not making any gd sense. There’s no way this came together the way I hoped in my head and .... For real I was never able to read this all the way thru. this is my first time, lol. and it was all disjointed on the authorial end to say the least. Im scared T-T

Jlxjvklsdkjfsjlkdkjlsjklkljzsdkjlgaskljdgjklasljkgdljkasljkdgjklasjlkdgljkaskljdgjakl?????????? 

Im not liking the ratio of dialogue to whatever the other stuff is. scene-setting I guess. prose maybe. i could have dragged this out way longer... By which I mean made it a more satisfying read. But WHATEVER !!!! 

TIMO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TIMOOOOOOOOOO NUMERO UNOOOO DO MUNDOOOOOO I really need to utilize him more. As soon as I finish this fic I need to write a Timo POV spinoff where he gets cancelled on furry twitter for proshipping in real life

Hmmmm chapter ending didn’t hit as hard in practice as it did in drafts. Oh well. God damn that was a lot to happen in one chapter LMAOO???

OH SHIT MY RICE IS STILL COOKING —— 

[bloodydelightss]

Smth that really makes me hot to think about is, like thinking about a big brother thats killed and tortured people... and weve already had this flowering blossoming incestious relationship. Where ive already noticed hes "off" in some way, but ive always enjoyed it and liked it. Ive never thought hed like actually hurt someone. But ive also never had to worry abt being hurt by him either, cause when it comes down to it hes nothing but sweet and gentle to me, the perfect big bro, really. And hes giving in bed, dominant but gentle. Sometimes even lets me dominate him. Hes good like that, ideal really. But anyways, once I find that fact out about him....... I still dont leave him, really. I love him in spite of it. But now im scared of what hed to do to me if he found out I KNOW. So I try to hide it from him, badly.

And once he figures it out, he like kidnaps me and keeps me prisoner. He builds me a cute little room, it has everything I like in it, its very much tailored to me. It still expresses his affection for me and maybe also how he idealizes me. But im still a prisoner nontheless.

And he apologies to me for having to do this to me, and that he loves me, but he just cant be sure I wont betray him or rat him out, that he never meant for me to find out. Hes even hesistant to touch me at all at that point, cuz he doesnt want me to get the wrong idea. This isnt abt violating me, its merely about trying to rescue the relationship to me he wants to keep, he doesnt want me to backstab him.

But nontheless im now trapped by my big brother, completely at his mercy, in a way he doesnt intend to take advantage of.

And even tho I havent written abt anything sexual there yet the idea of that gets me wetter than anything else honestly.

Cuz then it quickly turns into a situation of I have to prove to my big brother that I rlly rlly wont betray him, and that I do accept him, and that maybe ive always been into that part of him anyways. I love the idea of going thru rlly psychologically challenging emotions, like arousal, enjoying the power he wields, having fantasies of hurting others myself, but also the immense fear of the reality of it all. Cuz maybe its hot, but do I rlly not give a damn abt all the other ppl hes hurt? Do I care more about what gets me wet, and what gets him off, and our connection than random innocent ppl? Hes the one lacking empathy and a sense of guilt, not me.

Eitherway.... Its a rlly psychologically horror-like situation and im fundamentally attracted to that.

Ofc the solution pretty much after a long-wided proccess of slowly breaking my own capacity for empathy and guilt down, maybe talking a lot to him, sharing how I think and feel... even letting him touch me sexually whilst imprisoned by him... but also maybe learning to trust him more than before, cuz he has me utterly utterly helpless, and hes still being decent enough, I get good food, he respects my boundaries, hes not cruel, he doesnt have repressed anger resurfacing. Hes mostly just apologetic, sad, and maybe also admits to "enjoying" having me in his grasp a little to much.

Anyways.. eventually I would "choose him". And id tell him smth he probably thought of himself already, that he should take me along to kill and torture someone, incriminate me, make sure that however way this goes, I cannot betray him.

I like the idea of me..... yknow, tearing up as we kill the person, so confused by how good and powerful that feels, but also pushed beyond what my moral compass wud allow me by far. But then id also feel so much closer to my big brother, would understand him better, id get to enjoy what he enjoys.. id get to maybe feel freed of that empathy nd sense of guilt.

Id imagine him fucking the corpse of the first person we kill together right in front of me, and my hand slowly slipping inside my panties, speechless and afraid of how hot that is to me, and slowly, slowly that sensation of power comes over and I just feel better and better..

I smile at him and I am so happy I have him, so happy that thanks to him im able to feel that powerful, that alive, that taken care of. Hes all I could ever need or want.

[sundayroadkill]

i started watching btvs because of u. am on episode 1, when does this get good /gen

ok ok lemme give u some vibes for the seasons

season 1: camp camp camp this is the filler vibes lets learn these characters season, they have no budget, and were playing in the goosebumps silly space, the finale is the Best episode of the season

season 2: oh no romance is in the air and what is that? the emotional consequences of our actions? oh god noooo. this season is often people faves and the middle to second half is emotionally devastating. (still beware it has some of the lowest rated episodes) a season of finally some vamps with CHARACTER (if ur interested in spike and buffy then this is when we meet spike as the season antagonisttt)

season 3: the homoerotic subtext is in the AIR and buffy is not ok. this is the last highschool season and it has one of my all time fave fictional characters so i cannot have an unbiased opinion on most of this season (even tho it has the worst romance of the show by far in it) (if ur interested in faith and buffy tHIS is when we meeettt herrrr and god its messsyyy)

season 4: ok listen this is the lowest rated season of the show, but im so in love with it. the vibes are iNSANE, everyons trying to find their way after highschool and its clunky and have such weird polarizing eps but also one of the best episodes of television ive ever seen. also spike is back but this time hes their domesticated pet they have chained up in the bathroom

season 5: if u wanna know when things really pick up and get bonkers crazy its here. widely known as the best seaosn of the show and one of the best finales of all time and god i think its deserves that title. the story pacing is wild, spike is sure something this season, heartbreak, triumph, confusion, clever storytelling, this seasons so well done and u can watch buffys intense struggle into being an adult women

season 6: the most polarizing season. we explore buffys intense depression in the face of her own debilitating trauma and how it affects her ability to caretake for her family as well at take care of herself this season and its personally my favorite season of the whole show. spike and buffy are fucking insane this season, they are fucking a literal house down this season

season 7: final season of the show and it feels like it. the vibes are very oh boy howdy this is it huh. i think they make mostly good decisions this season that send me off to some amazing post series fanfictions so ultimately im happy

ok i got pretty high halfway thru that so if it makes no sense that would be why. but if ur interested in me making an essential episode list to help guide u thru earlier more filler seasons to get to the meat and bones just send an ask my way again 👍👍 id say give it to halfway season 2 and see how u feel

[plasmasimagination]

Heyy girl hows it goingg! Congrats on ur amazinggg milestone. Totally deserved 🪼🪼 I was wondering if i cld get a matchup for genshin and hsr ! I totally loved the others u did.

I go by the she series and id love to be matched up w a hot man 🤤 my mbti is enfp and im a gemini! Im around 5’3 with tan skin and hv super grown out long dyed brown hair. I have 8 piercings total on my ears and i know im gna cop more next summer bless up. I wld say i def have a more summer oriented aesthetic i loveee me a tank top n shorts and bikini.

Im not surr what kind of personality i have .. but i think im a freak. I love to party nd go out w my friends obviii but i absolutely love spending time by myself bc im chill like dat. I think im pretty funny but i also follow my heart a lil too much and do whatever i want when i want, so i cant set boundaries w myself.. im def tryna work on that and have a healthy grindset and balance. Im down to do anything w my friends BUT im also a lil bit of bitch ngl… a lil bit of a hater if i see some weird activity in front if me

I love the beach and summer and drives with loud music playinggg. My ideal day is a warm summer day on the beach with some Js and scrolling thru the x reader tag on tumblr on my ipad.

My interests are surfing and paddleboardinf!! Im super into gymming and looking up wikipedia horror movie summaries. Im pursuing health rn too 😜 and i try to write in my free time but it never works out LOL. I also love thrifting and flea markets and im down to rage if u are 🤙

If i had a short life id probably honestly spend it at home w the fam and w my dog and w all my friends. Id love to do some epic in state road trips or have bonfires by the beach. i think itd be sick to be surrounded by all the simple things i love.

When it comes to my love life…. Erm… i definitely can be attracted SO easily but im quick to find icks tbh. I dont think i fall in love easily but i definitely get high on the possibility of it. Lets just say im hard to get and hard to want 😈 My ideal type is someone whos athletic and good at math and is FINE AF. My lovr language is quality time (i LOVE ft) so someone whos willing to do stuff w me is a plus. I think i also like someone who can match my speed and humor bc i hate miscommunication and awkwardness

Thanku sm if u decide 2 do my req! ⭐️⭐️

Hello there fellow darling >:)

As for your request, I would say I found just the right manz for you, but i didn't, so work with them a bit and they'll be vibing with u in no time(ㅠ﹏ㅠ)

So let's go

.

.

.

AL HAITHAM

Smart collected calm and rational, just to balance you out

introvert x extrovert

He's definitely impressed by your carefree attitude, and often gets dragged into your small adventures, he might complain around a bit but he doesn't mind as much as he says he does

Hes confused as to how you have the energy to go out to parties and surfing and everything, he's just way too tired to even think about such things, so he'll prefer to watch you from the distance, in the comfort of a chair and a good book

Listen listen, I know I know, he's pissy and awkward, but I like to think he wouldn't be like that in a relationship, and is actually very good at communication and explaining his struggles and emotions

It might take him a bit to trust you but when he does, he's a good partner

He might not be able to match your humour, but he can match your speed, he's very efficient.

And if that relationship doesn't work out, do try with kaveh, because that could work out more (and yes i did just recommend to get with with your matchups roommate)

MR.RATIO

Nerd x his cool partner

This one is more to match your vibe kind off

He's a sassy and confident dude

He'll definitely be a fan of your bitchy attitude , he likes dealing with bests

Can match your energy, occasionally, sometimes not sometimes yes, but most of the time he'll just follow you around and watch you do your hobbies and interests while reading something

Cold colour dressed boyfriend x summer dressed partner, just perfection

He's an ambivert after all, so he can keep up with your trips and enjoyments, but sometimes will distance himself off to a corner to recharge his energy

Generally he's the first that came to mind when I saw your request so consider it fate

[golbrocklovely]

haven't done one of these in months, so i thought it was the perfect time to bring this back

here’s some of colby’s tweets from 2021.

if it’s bold and italicized, it’s someone’s tweet to him.

if it’s in (), that’s just me commenting lol

added bonus: if they have a * next to them, that means it’s been deleted

~~~~~~~~~~~

April 1 - just wanna make things right

April 4 - happy easter i’m hungover goodnight ?

@/mannymua733: 30 flirty and thriving

happy birthday!!! @/mannymua733: thank you my love!

fan: all manny wants from colby is this (video of colby grinding)

@mannymua733: that’s all i’m asking for colby if this is your b day wish i gotchu

hey if any of you guys have a semi truck could you please run me over with it thanks

@/deefizzy: Can i join the more the merrier !

April 7 - watch the time go by

there’s an angry squirrel in our backyard that tries to kill me every night

April 9 - i can admit that i have big commitment issues when it comes to relationships

April 11 - to the two girls i just met at chipotle … you made my day thank you for lifting my spirits i’m so grateful

April 13 - sometimes life just feels like a big dream to me it’s so hard to explain.

April 15 - who’s your comfort person?

April 19 - it’s hard to find things that excite me as much as they use to and i find that kinda sad. i miss being stoked about every little thing. wanna get that back

learning to let go

no matter what changes in the future .. just know i’ll remember the past

April 20 - i know you don’t believe it but i’d do anything for ya

April 27 - @/ohkailno: when im vaccinated im coming for u @/ColbyBrock

😈

May 2 - i got a PCR test yesterday that literally felt like they were trying to tickle the back of my Cranium

May 11 - fan: So you just gonna leave us hanging like that @/ColbyBrock (photo of him with the caption "it's time")

😏🖤

May 13 - @/katstuartmusic: should i make colby bald

no

May 17 - i hope you’re happy today i love you

May 23 - someone broke into our rental car in San Fransisco and they stole everything. but i’m most upset about my journal i’ve been writing in daily for the past 6 months… all my emotions, memories, details of life just gone. my 2021 story i can’t get back .. i’m heartbroken

@/lukewaale: duuude what :( that's messed up man, i'm sorry it’s all good man 💔 thanks for sayin something. gotta look at the bright side .. everything’s replaceable

May 28 - you can’t miss what you forget

(it's so clear to me now that this man was clearly going thru so much. this is when things really changed for him and how he interacted with us. it's sad to look back on this now)

June 19 - feels good to be back.

June 28 - fan: I FORGOT @/ColbyBrock IS AN UNUS ANNUS FAN SIR EHAT WAS UR FAV VIDEO

the one where they have a staring contest ! hahahah

[regina-cordium]

me? responding to a post i got tagged in? wild!

got tagged by @renninflight

Rules: always post the rules. answer the questions the person who tagged you has written and write eleven new ones. tag 11 new people and link them to your post. let them know you’ve tagged them

except. i never know who to tag for these. if u see this tagged ur it. ill put questions at the end

under cut, because as yall know im a Yapper

What's your favorite band/musician? (And tell me why! And if you've seen them live!)

I'm a Hozier girlie thru and thru. he was in boston in march AND HAD NOAH KAHN AND I COULDNT GO AND IM STILL SO DISAPPOINTED. A N D HE WAS AT BOSTON CALLING AND I C O U L D N ' T G O auuuuugh

What's something you're proud of?

i dont mean this in, like, a self deprecating way. but i honestly dont know what to say. i got dean's list a couple times in college. i won some kinda award and now my name is on a plaque in the english department, thats kinda dope (i, to this day, have no idea what it was for)

What's something you like about yourself?

i do tell my parents they overestimate how smart i am, but i will say i am p good with trivia/knowing random things. nothing better than getting most of a jeopardy board right (<- needs to go outside more)

What's something you would like to do, if money weren't an obstacle?

i would literally never leave school. i love learning things (see above)

What's something you do when you're anxious or stressed to calm down and relax?

listen to music, sometimes Very Loudly

Do you have a favorite author? (If so, who?)

im totally blanking, but i dont really think so? theres not really an author that i see and immediately go "oh i gotta read ALL of their stuff RIGHT NOW" yknow?

Do you have a favorite poet? (If so, who?)

emily dickinson. yes, i am gay, how'd you know?

Do you have a favorite artist? (You can probably guess the rest of this question!)

van gogh!!!!!!! i know its such a basic bitch answer, but i L O V E the impressionists

What's a movie or TV show that had a big impact on you? (Could be something you watched growing up, a movie you saw recently that made you emotional, something you've seen a lot, something you quote with friends and family, etc)

i would watch beauty and the beast on vhs CONSTANTLY growing up. tv show wise, definitely buffy and angel and charmed. watched them with ma growing up and they have absolutely shaped my interests since then. also, and i swear im not being sarcastic, supernatural. ma and i watched every goddamn episode together since the pilot and look at me now.

What's something you wish you could forget? (Could be something personal, or it could just be a gross or weird fact)

not to get Very Fucking Morbid, but my dad almost died when i was 12 and i'd super love to forget that, actually

What's something you'd like to change about the world?

I Cannot Emphasize Enough That You Should Care About Other People

okay here're my questions. if u got this far, u are doubly tagged. idk i never know who to tag.

Song you've had on repeat lately?

Favorite play/musical (or both!)?

Book/movie/show you think somebody should read/watch to understand you better?

What's your favorite poem?

What's immediately to your left?

Favorite dessert?

Somewhere you'd love to travel, if money/accommodations were no issue?

Tv show currently/last watched?

Do you think aliens are real?

Do you think ghosts are real?

Do you have overly specific requirements for a room when you're trying to sleep?

[a-v-j]

Akills and Hryxy rp-turn-to-short fic

Content warning:

Swearing, not really a polished fic so format can be a bit wonky, mentions of sex, a bit of 4th wall break, existential crisis

Written by @nyxus-nyx and me

Enjoy~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Chapter 4: Youre the first

Akills: italic

Hyryx: bold

Akills waved it off and went to stare somewhere else, scoffing at the idea that sex could be as sacred as a SOUL bond.

"Welp, good to know we have difference views and principles when it comes to that...for us, skeletons, SOUL bond is what we consider a big deal. Any skeleton unfortunate enough to be sexual just do it for shits and giggles or basic intimacy" He rambled

”I dont get it.. for halfbreeds.. we use intercorse as the moment we.. soul bond.. its.. just how we Roll..” he holds his own hand to his chest where his soul is.

“Skeletons just do it for fun hm..? Stupid..”

"your kind soul bond thru sex? Well, that's doing two things at once"

"Doesn't mean we dont do that too, sex and a bond can happen when passion peaks high enough. We can just do either just sex or bond, or both. Some skeletons dont have parts for sex so that's why the bond is the main go-to" He continues on, ignoring that slight comment.

”Mm..”

He sighs.

“What does it even feel like.?” He scratches at his chest again.

"heh"

He tilt his head down as he quietly chuckled.

"Ya gotta be specific, buddy"

”Soul bond.. I never did it to my wife.. she never deserved it but stil..”

He clenches his fist.

“Told it felt nice..”

Akills expression softens a bit as he's able to recollect what a soul bond felt like, he stares blankly for a moment as fond memories softly flashed back to him, then he got a faint image of who he was doing it with and made his mood sour. His expression changes but went on to describe it to Hryxy anyway.

"It's more than nice...it felt like a connection...overwhelming, rush-inducing, feeling of completeness, we can actually feel what we feel for each other... it's like you're able to see what's exactly inside. You'll feel a lot of emotions there, some that are even hidden from both of you. It's more than nice, it's feeling fulfilled "

Hryxy looked at Akills and chuckled.

“Sounds like you have a bit of venom in those words..”

He turns to face Akills once more.

"..heh...one of the many things robbed away from me..."

He looks back to Hryxy, his sockets void of his eyelight and expression unreadable. But his vibe indicate it was a big deal for him

”Hm.. did you ever.. find that one person who robbed you of it..?”

He crosses his arms.

"theyre watching us right now"

Hryxy twitches.

“Oh..?”

"theyre the one playing god and making me, me...i never ask to be, to be honest"

"But boy they sure do like exploring possibilities"

He stopped his leaning position and went sitting cross legged, head down, making his face hidden in the shadows.

”Well. Mine is trying to make me, sentimental.. and feel things..”

He grumbles as he grits his teeth.

“Stupid.”

)HEY-)

"its funny how we are aware of it and still play the stories set for us as if it's a real thing...kinda depressing when you think about it..."

Akills started fiddling with his fingers, not looking at anything but still under the darkness of his hood

Hryxy looks at Akills.

“We have to.. or we’ll end up being scrap.. well.. atleast me..”

Hryxy reaches over and pats Akills head.

Akills stiffens at the touch but lets it be

"Heh, id rather be scrapped, left, forgotten. And i don't mean killing myself, it's more like wishing there were never a trace of me ever. It suck to be who i am"

"Pretty sure you feel the same...being thrown in unnecessary angst for the sake of a "what-if"..."

”Yeah. That atleast my whole life.. hated it.. but gotta live through it.. well for me to die through it and grow rotten..”

He laughs a lil rubbing his hooded skull.

“But bud, im not good with.. ‘comfort’ but atleast.. use that anger or hopelessness on thing that drive you.. well.. crazy.. that works for some of us atleast..”

Akills laughs bitterly

"What do you think im doing. Im killing myself off frame by frame. I know it's hopeless. But...

It gives me a sense of purpose.

Even if it's a fake one.

I know for sure i wont be scrapped like those fortunate enough to be uninteresting, might as well take some of what's coming for me"

"Cant exactly fight god, they could let me but it'll never be real. Dont exactly have a choice but play by their rules, pretend i mean what i am and forget all this is just play...

Heh

Sorry, it's getting existentially heavy" 

Hryxy sighs and grabs Akills and pulls him into a bear hug. “Dont say shit.. just fuckin calm down.. not the end of our worlds yet..”

He grits his teeth wanting to scratch his chest but he protests it.

“Not everyday meetin someone.. who wanted to ring you of your spine then get sentimental.. huh?”

Perhaps forgetting the heavy things is therapeutic, he always been doin it and it felt more better to be in character than feel like shit for being aware of being a character.

Akills would usually kill for the unwanted hug but this one felt right. Felt like a kind that actually gets where his coming from and that it indeed appropriate for the situation. He accepts it

"Heh, nope, youre the first"

(End rp?)

"God, fckn finally"

(Or ya wanna add Hryxy's response?)

"Oh ffs"

(we can end it buddy.)

“Lol.”

The end :D

[fortunefool]

hi hello everyone!! im here w yu sera and her luck manip ability!! aka ur rabbit's foot & broken mirror in one! ik ik ... 2 in 1 .... what a steal ! formal descriptions / pages will b coming this weekend!!!

dc is avail. upon req if u prefer it over tumblr ims (which im ok with, btw!!) & like this if u wna put our beasts in some situations (if u want to plot) ! OH! and ty to evry1 who has alrdy reached out!! tw for mentions of : death, murder, drowning, sewer side.

ㅤㅤㅤ 𖹭 ㅤㅤㅤ statistics .

name : yu sera. (유세라)

birthday: 980922. (twenty5)

hometown: yongin, south korea.

education: master degree in nursing, second yr.

residence: yellow hall('s resident advisor)

ㅤㅤㅤ 𖹭 ㅤㅤㅤ biography & co .

you see, sera's life has been L after L after L, back to back

her mother? poor, modest, v excited to have a daughter. her f*ther? HWAKTHU. fluctuating between rich and poor, gambling his life away, alw fucking around, messing w the wrong people, scamming!

scammer on scammer hate crime ensues when a dubious low budget genie irl tells sera's dad "give me all the $$$ u have. but dw dw! i can grant u a wish... such as.... i'll give ur newborn daughter the power of Luck." and he leaves out the part that Luck is bad n good.

and what does her dad do? he listens!!! a born, living, lucky charm? sign him tf up!!!! he waits for sera to be born, tells her mom that he has to leave n he will take sera (so he doesnt have to share the lucky charm yknow), the mom tries to fight for the daughter but... ope... person w money vs person w no money.... yea... head low.

sooooo, she spends her childhood pretty happy. daddy's girl n all! w an ability that she believes to be some form of Good Luck Manip. she sees her dad as the best man in the world and he. loves. it. why? bc it makes her ability v powerful and he keeps on winning, buying expensive things, not being caught etc etc... just living the best life off of sera... but ofc. nothing lasts forever.

sera enters her teenage years and hell breaks loose. she accidentally learns that her mother didnt abandon them (as per her dad's fake sob story), she figures out that her dad is no Fair businessman and it alllll comes crumbling down.

so young and so shaken up with new, different emotions, she quickly learns that she can manifest bad luck as well. luckily(?) for her dad, she was still in denial so the bad luck wasnt strong enough to k*ll him off.... but it did take away all of his riches which cld count as murder in his books. long story short, he becomes a Monster, trashes her things, kicks her out, leaves her out in the street w nothing.

i'll try to make this part rlly brief bc i want her Trauma to be traumaing but i also dont want to get into graphic deets!! couch surfing at a friend. friend dies. parents hate her. sera starts searching for her mom, someone tells her that she's dead. ope... sera tries to end it all bc of that by drowning. randomly gets saved. ends up living w this cute ol lil lady, a retired nurse, who feels like a grandma figure for sera... baow. accidental bad luck manifestation makes them get into an accident, guess who survives thru survival luck and who doesnt. yea....

so ... you may be thinking ... now what. WELL. she hears abt sua ... abt the Patch (one that she cldnt afford/get her hands onto) so she decides well. im sick of being the bad guy (accidentally) all the time, im sick of spiraling, im sick of my ability fluctuating. let me become a nurse and help out! maybe i'll finally get to use my power for proper good this time....

soooooo she tries to cheer up during her uni years. she gets more control over her ability but theres still lots to learn! her emotions still affect her deeply but its no longer THAAAAAAAAT bad.

her goals? become a v v v good nurse. gain complete control over her ability and use it w her job. help ppl w her power. find her mom. and... devious smile..... find her dad to k*ll him w the bad luck.

ㅤㅤㅤ 𖹭 ㅤㅤㅤ ability .

luck manip!!! she can give u good luck or bad luck!!! her eyes turn green when it's good luck & black when it's bad luck! she can touch u, look at u, think of u, it works either way! ofc, she can do more w a touch than w a thought!

she can make you get the luck you need to find your keys or to win the lottery! she can make you spill ur coffee all over ur new clothes or get u vvv sick! anything goes! if it's a casual ez kind of luck (keys, coffee), then she'll need a few moments to regain her energy. if its smth more extreme (lottery, sickness), she needs a few days (even up to a week), to recover!!! the more complex it is, the more it drains her energy!

it's all within d laws of physics & limits of 'reality' ! so she cant get you to magically materialize ur lost keys back and she cant spill invisible coffee on u! ALSO!!! this ability only works in like... idk.... a 100-200 miles radius!

her Survival Luck is also present n exists and she can (and has alrdy) managed to survive a bunch of extreme situations (see above)! however, the Way that she survives it.... out of her control fr.... cld be a scratch, cld be 5 broken bones, not up to sera!

ㅤㅤㅤ 𖹭 ㅤㅤㅤ brief personality .

she's v chill and looooooves helping people!!! not super hyper BUT still a fun girl nonetheless! not boring by any means despite being v toned down and lowkey!

DESPITE the previous bullet point, she is extremely afraid of getting attached to people and LET ALOOOOONE love them so she tries to keep everyone at arms length. why? obv bc of her ability and her fear of not being able to control it properly... she doesnt want another friend + grandma incident.

has a tendency to become mellow / nostalgic and can be caught overthinking... which she tries to do while on that nullivi .... ofc! LDFDFGJJ

ㅤㅤㅤ 𖹭 ㅤㅤㅤ plots .

a few friends????? a few foes?????? a few younger ppl @ yellow hall she's helped out as a resident advisor??? someone who tries to get close to her but shes ADAMANT on not letting that happen?

ppl affected by her good luck..... what abt ppl affected by her bad luck.... ooo swearing up and down that she didnt mean it and it was accidental... cld be true or not. ppl accusing her of using her powers when she didnt? OOOO what abt using the bad luck on a person that she was told was a bad person but sera was only manipulated into thinking soooooooo ooooooouuuuu

someone who's known her ever since she was a teenager? watching her go thru the whole spiral of bad luck??? maybe theyre older and even told her abt sua!!!

what if there's someone who jus doesnt believe that she has an ability? or they do and they think its a stupid one? NLKFJGN idk...

i kinda want lots of angst for her.... i think it'd be fitting.... lets put sera and ur muse thru the pain machine tgt!

THANK YOU FOR READING / SKIMMIN THRU THISSSSSSSSSS SMUAAAAAAAAAAAAACH!!

[kodev]

Thoughts about sorawo and toriko?

oh my god so many. keep in mind i havent reread the novels in maybe a year now so i might be off with some of the stuff im about to say...

i have many thoughts on sorawo and toriko SEPARATELY But from the phrasin of this and also assumin u meant like them romantically iwill sally forth. bonus drawing if u make it all the way thru this word vomit

i think the main reason i love the main pairing together is because of the slow burn and also because i think they are (slowly) growing together and enabling each other to become better versions of themselves. and they both (while stumbling and not through perfect efforts) try to leave each other space and push each other to recover from their respective traumas. its all very sweet and very human. sorawo's side is more obvious: i think meeting toriko has allowed sorawo to feel like she has more self control over her life, and also (slowly) i think befriending toriko means for sorawo, shes slowly opening her heart for other people in her life. esp with the series opening the way that it does with sorawo going "nobody would miss me if i died. except the debt collectors" and then toriko entering and not leaving her alone which then starts a whole domino cascade of events that end up with sorawo being surrounded with people who do love and care for her. aueugsdhfshfrg (emotional). on a side note i like how miyazawa gives sorawo agency in her growth---i think too often a character who is traumatized gets sort of shuttled in to a specific road of recovery, and if they display behaviors or opinions that appear antithetical to their recovery, i feel like they get infantilized like oh you dont know your own mind and stuff. but with sorawo miyazawa lets her take things at her own pace, set her own boundaries, and have like idk emotions seen as more "flawed" than usual. i enjoy it it also feels very human and compassionate of the story

toriko is a whole other story. i think her growth is a lot more subtle since we dont see a lot of her pov and we have to infer what is happening from sorawo's erm... unreliable narration at times. with toriko i think at first she reaches out to sorawo for the same reason sorawo is drawn to her---they're both very lonely and isolated people. over time however, i think toriko (esp in vol 8) has shown a lot of growth as she is now able to take sorawo's apparent rejections less personally if that makes sense? like she's gained the self confidence to stand on her own two feet which is a change from the start of the series where she was depending on different people (satsuki then sorawo) to make herself feel more complete. idk if that makes sense and i might be completely off on that mark lmao again i havent read the novels in a hot sec. i think sorawo's part in this is sorawo treats toriko as an equal for the most part, which is something she didnt probably get with satsuki. i imagine this allowed toriko to feel more loved, but also allowed her to do a lot more self reflectiona nd growth. love her to bits sorry if any of this is wrong also i feel like im forgetting things

tldr i love stories where traumatized characters meet each other by chance and then become best friends (accomplices) and then fall for each other while becoming better versions of themselves in the meanwhile. and soratori is really good at exploring the dynamics of this <3 yay

heres buff toriko i was drawing for fun. i have myreasons for this but #1 reason is that the world is made out of pudding

[thevalleyoftriumph]

11 13 5

11] give a general summary of the plot/world/characters.

OK SO I HAVE. A HANDFUL OF STORIEZ that i havent commented on publicly yet so im choosing my umm actual original story. instead of my like roblox ocz. ok ? ok.

so uhh the story is [dropping the z's] unnamed. as of rn. bcos i cant be assed. BUT! its a very modern fantasy esque kinda thing but like Real casual about it. humans and vampires and werewolves and robots and androids and all sorts of things you can think of, theyre probably there.

while its relatively close to our world [save for The Everything] theres also things like magic, ghosts, etc. one of these things is these little void. emotion eater things. theyre created by a strong collection of negative emotions in one area, and they eat em! usually this results in temporary relief for any individual people they eat from, so theyre not really a Bad thing, but a lot of them around an area or one following someone is Usually not a good sign. sometimes theyre also created by people with unfinished business dying, but being unable to finish that business is what seperates them from ghosts.

the plot of the story follows acheron, a moth boy going to college for psychology and stuff, and who deals with a HELL of a lot of depression. he had lost his best friend recently, and ontop of childhood trauma, is just straight up Not Having A Good Time. despite doing good in school and having friends he loves and who loves him, he cant seem to get any better - until one day, a void creature named snapdragon starts following him around, trying to convince him to be its full time food source.

he rejects its offer, because if he wants to get better, he wants to work through his issues on his own terms at a natural pace. instead though, he soon learns that snapdragon has its own issues - namely, being it wasnt born like this, and was instead murdered as a once living person. so, it bargains with acheron, and convinces him to let it stay so that he can help it find out who killed it, bring them to justice, and let it finally move on. obviously, things dont go as planned, and a bunch of stuff happens :3

13] how long have you been working on this project? what has changed from the outset?

oh a few years now, if i had to say! the idea came to me innn 2020 i wanna say? and i only started working on it 2021/2022. pretty new but its been through a bunch of reworking and stuff.

most of whats changed as been character designs! the story has stayed relatively the same, but designs themselves have been tweaked a few times. ive been considering redesigning acheron and finally getting around to designing his friends [other than his One[1] friend w a design rn] but ahhh im lazy <3

other than that uhh. god probably how i characterize snapdragon has changed the most. its still a very classic flirty kinda-mischievious guy, but its general personality has Def been reworked from its original. :3

5] pick a theme song for the tv adaptation.

OK THIS ONE HAD ME THINKING A BUNCH BECAUSE IIII COULD NOT THINK OF ANYTHING but after some thought and consideration [and a lot of rummaging thru my youtube songs playlist] ive decided onnn

"end the dance." by chonny jash :]

[pinkmoondoll9shihtzu]

do you think we should forgive people who havw hurt us? even if they aren't sorry or even aware of the hurt theyve caused? you dont hava to respond to this if you dont want to , but i am just thinking, is it actually wise to let specific people exist in my life , (a parent) when they are delusionally unaware of the lifelong damage theyve caused me (and will never understand), or anyone really. Is there a point in.. getting angry, when they oncr again show that they really dont know or care. Still, i enjoy talking to them. So im thinking that maybe forgiving would be better . but i feel like that way i might be gaslighting myself. Have you ever read anything on this?

there is a good book on this anon, "adult children of emotionally immature parents", u can read it online for free if u google the PDF. it is monumentally eye opening. other than that, i can speak from my own experience w/ my parents. i'll put it under readmore cus im bout to get a lil personal;

so, basically, i have one parent, my mom, because my dad has been dead for over 15 years. my parents were alcoholics who worked full time dead end jobs and we never had a close relationship, but i was closer to my dad. when he died, my mom absolutely lost her mind, like, maybe this is dramatic but i do pretty much consider myself an orphan because in 2006 i lost both of them. my mom chose booze, despite the fact that it made her act completely volatile and disturbed, she chose the liquor over me n my sister. my sister is an extrovert and she started spending All her time at other ppl's houses so i was constantly alone with my mom. the emotional abuse she dealt me after my dad's death i think are the wounds within me that truly can never be healed. worse than having to watch him die. my mother would berate me for everything i did, my appearance, the fact i was flunking school, my friends, and most of all, she would always remind me that i am a bad daughter who doesn't love her enough. once i started w the suicide attempts her abuse and guilt trips only got worse. i made a lot of reckless decisions just trying to get away from her. i still feel immeasuable guilt that she is my only living parent but i can't be her daughter. i havent seen her in 3 years..

now that the context is out of the way, here's how i feel about forgiveness: you HAVE to forgive. you have to. for your own sake. to free yourself. for me, when im so so belligerently angry at my mom, i imagine her as a child. i think of her childhood where she was born to a 16 y/o polish ww2 orphan girl and a 17 y/o fatherless boy who had already been thru several detention camps + was forced to join the navy to avoid jail time. i think of the stories she'd tell me from her childhood where she constantly moved from trailer park to trailer park, the caretaker of her 3 younger sisters while her parents worked, her dad often disappearing for months at a time w no explanation, her mother in and out of psych wards. she's always casually bringing up how her parents would beat her if the trailer wasn't spotless when they got home. she was mercilessly bullied at school for being poor so she's never had many friends. she never got any education and has worked retail/cashier positions her whole life. she had to watch her husband slowly waste away, then go right back to work so we could just barely afford to eat. i think of all these factors and it's so so easy to forgive her, despite it all. like if i could reach into her chest and grab her heart and pour all of the forgiveness inside of me into her body just so she could feel happy and light for one single day, i would do it. we are all so broken and forgiveness is the only way we can ever put things back together.

that being said anon...i still have an immensely hard time talking to her. every time we talk on the phone she immediately just starts dumping all of her problems onto me, like how she used to do when i was a kid and she was drunk. she refuses to acknowledge she could ever possibly benefit from therapy. she can't even begin to acknowlege the ways she hurt and abused me. she is deeply, deeply emotionally immature. when i talk to her it rly feels like im talking to a severely damaged child. our conversations are short. i dont tell her anything about my life, i never have. we'll never be close, i've accepted it. sometimes i have days where i'm so angry at her that im ready to send myself to the psych ward over it. but the damage is done, it cant be taken back, only moving forward. and at the end of the day, i forgive her. and i want her to be ok.

i'm not sure what's happened to you with your parent anon, but just know, you can forgive from afar, you don't have to keep engaging with them if they continuously harm you. i really really reccomend reading adult children of emotionally immature parents. its only like 200 pages and you'll fly through it. like i said, available for free as a pdf online. i wish you the best anon and im sorry you have to go thru this but you're not alone. #<333

[davestriderascend]

the homestuck reread pt. 1 (so far)

alright lets get into it. i just finished act 5, so this seems like as good of a place as any to recap. this is already getting really long, so this post will cover acts 1-4, and ill talk about act 5 in the next post

Act 1-3

acts 1 thru 3 are extremely short, and largely center john, his eventually named friends, and johns ascent into the medium. the story is propelled by reader commands, full of pop culture references, and largely about the fun video game mechanics and jokes hussies setting up with sburb. all art has been hussies so far, and the first three albums (vol 1, 2, and 3, each one corresponding with the obvious act) have consisted entirely of mostly short songs all written for and used in flash pages. there might be one or two original ones that im forgetting, but im pretty sure the albums were just collections of songs used in the comic at this time. during this time, hussie also had his first formspring going, and occasionally made updates on their blogspot blog. she ALSO created a blog for dave, which i did, unfortunately, read.

The Characters

like i said, 1-3 are mostly just about john. rose is introduced and named at the very end of act 1, while dave is introduced and named in act 2. john is the only character who enters the medium, while panels about rose and dave mostly focus on rose acting as johns server player while struggling to maintain her wifi connection through the storm and meteor shower, and dave trying to set up his server client connection to rose. jade is teased, but not introduced at this time. very few trolls make an appearance this early in, if... any? i dont remember.

john is a chipper, goofy kid who loves his family and his friends and has bad taste in media, and i love him every bit as much as i did the first time reading homestuck. as with all of the guardians in early homestuck, honestly, johns relationship with his dad is particularly compelling, watching him roll his eyes and go through the typical rebellious teenager antics, while also witnessing that they very obviously care about each other a lot! the way he cuts through dave and roses shit and teases them is a lot of fun, and hussie does a really great job of setting up early in that these kids have been really good friends for a long time.

rose is honestly my favorite this go around. shes snarky and her humor is biting and at times childish, and her dramatics, while often just silly theatrics, often hint at really compelling emotional turmoil and backstory. shes a complex character right out the gate, with tangled feelings about her mom, her interests, and her cat, who projects an image toward her friends in order to protect her feelings. still, its obvious that if rose is ever sincere about anything, its her unending love for her friends, and its this kind of juxtaposition between this edgy, sarcastic, and grimdark personality she puts off and these warmer, goofy moments that make her so much fucking fun.

dave has a lot less focus in early homestuck, and seems to largely serve as the voice of reason and guide to john. hes the savvy coolkid, who already has shit like sylladexes figured out, and is usually the one who points out obvious solutions to john and moves the plot forward. he is also. the voice through which hussie projects a lot of the worst moments of bigotry in hs, and there are a loooooot of slurs. so. thats there. my first readthrough, i imprinted on dave instantly like a baby bird and he quickly became my favorite, but this go around hes honestly been a lot less compelling for me.

the exiles are introduced in act 2, and mostly function as silly, simple comic relief, and some vague foreshadowing as to whats to come. theyre simple characters, but i fucking love them. so much.

The Plot

early hs is probably the most coherent, plotwise. hussie has a plan in place, and shes pretty sure she knows where shes going with it. despite the randomness of the reader commands, the next step is always obvious on the horizon- getting all the players in to play sburb. its really simple, and its kind of nice to just sit back and enjoy feeling like everythings going to be wrapped up nicely (even tho it wont be). i also just like, really enjoy a lot of the humor in early hs and the video game jokes and stuff, so it was a lot of fun to read! its very reminiscent of problem sleuth at this stage. i also really enjoy the exiles, and i think the early acts are where they really get most of their attention

The Albums

i think its cool that each album has a kids symbol in 1-4, and its cool to listen to the early music that really set the stage for a lot of later, huge songs. a lot of these songs are referenced and remixed like, constantly, and its really cool listening to a song and going hey! that sounds like its got some heir of grief in there! while ive listened to a lot of the hs soundtrack, i mostly listened to later albums, so i was surprised to learn just how early toby fox started working on hs. and how much. jesus

The Formspring and Blogs

ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. listen. dont read these. save yourself the agony. the blogspot is really more just the act 1 and immediate post problem sleuth era, so i got bored of it pretty quickly and gave up on reading it. it wasnt super relevant to my reread experience.

the formspring, the FIRST ONE, is much worse than the second one hussie made, and is just. full. of nonsense troll asks, stupid posts that dont mean anything, and hussie justifying artistic choices that dont need to be justified again and again to people who are just being mean for no reason. there are some really funny posts in there, and there are also some posts that provide cool background info that you wouldnt otherwise know, and there are a lot of inside jokes in hs that started on the formspring, so it can be cool to see those develop. however. there is also a lot of bigotry, a lot of hussie saying really stupid shit, and a lot of just inane questions that wasted so much of my time. it takes forever to read, and sometimes i regret it.

daves blog is. ugh. its like sbahj but he says the n word and i think thats all that really needs to be said about it. it was a really unpleasant read. on that note, i am not reading sbahj. i didnt read it the first time, im not going to read it now, and i do not care how much it references hs and vice versa. sbahj fucking sucks, and houses some of hussies worst bigotry moments, and i just. really do not want to get into that.

The Intermission

the (first) intermission is one of the shorter intermissions in homestuck and revolves entirely around the midnight crew and the felt. this is the one where the mc breaks into the felt mansion and starts breaking clocks, killing people, and fucking shit up. not much happens, other than introducing the felt and mc. during this time, the midnight crew: drawing dead is released as the first album w new songs not previously featured on panel.

The Characters

ive always been a huge fan of intermission characters. its a really goofy little sidestory in hs and feels very problem sleuth at times, but i love it a lot! still, there isnt a ton to say here, in part bc the intermission is so short, and in part bc its really about the midnight crew and not the felt. itchy, doze, trace, cans, die, stitch, fin, eggs, and clover are minor side characters who mostly just exist to die. also snowman is teased, briefly. i think clover and doze probably get the most detail work, and then. maybe trace and fin? tragic stuff.

The Album

i liked this one! its been a hot second since i listened now so youll have to forgive me if my review isnt super detailed, but it was fun to see how the artists worked together to kind of create a musical profile for the city and the crew! very experimental, very cool.

Act 4

jade is FINALLY introduced! this act focuses more on balancing all four kids, with rose entering the medium at the beginning, dave entering towards the end, and hussie finally catching us up on this last mystery friend of johns. the exiles (midnight crew included) get a lot of attention in this act, showing not only their actions in exile, but also who they were before exile, and the trolling really gets going in this act. this is also the act where john ectobiologies all over the place, and where derse and prospit start to become relevant. the trolls still havent been revealed fr, and jade still hasnt entered the medium! during this time, hussie was answering questions on the first formspring still, and vol 4 and vol 5 were released.

The Characters

this act focuses a lot on jade, especially early in. ive always had a hard time relating to jade as a character, and shes never really been one of my favorites, but shes absolutely instrumental to the plot of hs and this act really shows just how much shes contributed to setting up the game. shes also more often than not the vehicle for how we get to see the trolls in early hs, because for soem reason they seem to pester her more than anyone else??

in the medium, john gives us the best view of how sburb is supposed to be played. he goes on sidequests, talks to the salamanders, builds cool stuff, fights imps, and just sort of does what hes supposed to! similar to acts 1-3, act 4 is still setting up sburb.

i think the only trolls who really receive any kind of prominence this early in are tavros, karkat, kanaya, and terezi, but dont quote me on that.

other than john and jade tho, i think most of the stuff i have to say abt the characters in this act wld be better saved for talking abt in act 5 act 2

The Albums

im not going to talk abt vol 4 or the formspring here bc i think i already covered both in 1-3, but vol 5 was also released towards the end of act 4! vol 5 is some stuff in the comic, and a lot of stuff that isnt in the comic, and has a pretty cool album cover! this one has some songs that wind up being referenced in songs that are really well known or well loved (for example, sunslammer, which toby remixes for the undertale soundtrack (and i think also gets remixed into a song that gets remixed into moonsetter?), or crystalanthemums, which will eventually be referenced for crystalmethequins (one of my favorite hs songs)). it also has hardchorale, which was so fucking trippy to listent o that i actually posted the link to it in my liveblog. 10/10. hilarious. my favorite song on this album is planet healer, which is also one of my favorite hs songs!

thats acts 1-4 covered, so expect act 5...... soon.

EDIT: heres my recap of act 5 subacts 1 & 2