Tumgik
#im tired and im exhausted and im confused and i dont know who or what to believe
dead-salmon · 17 days
Text
what fucks with my brain is i see people with who many of my political views align with
but then they go "north korea has a good government actually, so does china, the ddr was a good thing, it's all just western propaganda" and i'm????
am i missjng something here? did i miss something here? i cann 100% well say the ddr isn't and wasn't a good thing, but wdym n.korea and chinas governments are good actually. aren't those dictatorships? how are they good? am i missing something? are they actually dictatorships or not? what's the propaganda here, dictatorship or no dictatorship??? i know there's lits of propaganda about it in the west, but they're still not good governments?? right???? help???????????
6 notes · View notes
Text
thats that me espresso!! // theodore nott x fem reader
playlist: espresso - sabrina carpenter
summary : theodore nott hasnt slept in days, and it was for one reason only. (or one person)
fluff , hufflepuff reader , y/n , short
lucky girl syndrome!! (another theo fic) masterlist
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
rubbing his eyes wearily , theodore nott poked at his breakfast , feeling the eyes of concerened friends burning into him.
"what?" he asked blankly finally looking up at his friends.
"theo is something wrong?" lorenzo asked with genuine concern snaking through his face and tone.
"yes something- no someone is wrong!" theodore said angrily as he dropped his fork , "i have not slept well for days!"
"why?" draco asked , not really that bothered by theodores insomnia , just wanting to get the tired vibe out of the friendgroup.
"because..beacause!" he started before pausing each time , finally sighing and saying in a hushed voice ,"her!"
his whisper shout and eyes staring into the distance made the whole friend group follow his eyeline , landing on a hufflepuff girl talking to her friends , y/n.
"stop staring!" he said loudly making the whole group turn back to him , drawing their eyes away from the girl , eventhough theodore himself didnt look away.
"y/n? what has she done?" lorenzo asked , confused why his hufflepuff friend would be causing theodore struggle.
"great , of course youre on a first name basis with her!" theodore seethed in jealousy finally tearing his eyes away from your smiling face , "shes not really....done anything.. God i dont know shes like an espresso , i cant look at her without getting a burst of energy! and i cant stop thinking about her its keeping me up all fucking night!!"
the group watched as theodore ranted , exchanging knowing looks before pansy decided to speak up , "theodore dont get angry with that poor girl , its not her fault you like her!"
"how could i ever get angry with her," theodore muttered and stopped talking , until matteos laugh filled the short silence , "what are you laughing at dickhead!" theodore snapped , assuming matteo was laughing at him.
"oh nothing im just laughing at diggory trying to chat up your girl," matteo smirked watching everyone frantically look back to the hufflepuff girl , only to see that she was still sat and talking with her friends , cedric no where to be seen.
theodore , who had stood up in a panic smacked matteo on the back of the head and angrily snapped at the laughing boy, "shut up man not funny."
"sorry , sorry youre really gulible ," matteo laughed to himself , draco smirking at the two.
"i shoudlve never told you lot ," theodore grumbled himself , going back to poking his food.
"dont be like that theo , just a bit of fun , " blaise smirked as theodore threw him an angry look.
"no but seriously theodore , you cant let yourself be exhausted because of a girl" pansy said.
"shes not just a girl , shes nice and funny and beautiful and!-... im pathetic," theo sighed in frustration and ran a hand through his curls.
"im done with all this sappy , annoying shit , go ask her to hogsmeade or ill do it. and trust me i wont rest until she falls in love with me, " draco warned , attempting at making his friend confess.
"DONT!" theodore shouted at him , immediatly letting embrassment sink in as everyone , including you, turned to look at him, "ill....do it"
lorenzo and pansy spoke words of encouragment as the petrified boy rose from the table , draco , matteo and blaise forgetting the whole ordeal and discussing quidditch instead.
once theodore was far enough from the table pansy turned to enzo , "why is that the most emotion ive ever seen out of him in our whole lifelong friendship?"
"dunno , hufflepuffs are really effective i guess," enzo shrugged before they both skipped to another conversation and started eating again.
----
theodore walked towards your table with a confident stride , stopping behind you and sliding in next to you on the bench , close enough to the point that your bodies were pressed togther. as you jumped in suprise theo gave you a flirty smile and stared you dead in the eye.
"hi theodore , can i help you?" you asked wearily , glancing away from him and at your confused friends for a split second.
"yes, you can ," thedore smirked , "how about hogsmeade , this weekend , you and me?"
you physically paused as your mouth hung open , this was the second time you had ever talked to theodore nott and he was suddenly asking you out??!
"oh um....yeah - yeah sure id love to" you gave him a smile , a little cautious and very much confused.
"great , see you then beautiful ,"he winked, planting a kiss on your cheek before slipping out of the bench and confidently walking back to the slytherin table.
you looked at your friends with deep confusion, before going on to watch theo walk away , whilst your friends yapped about how hot he is.
-----
"so how was it?" pansy asked theodore as he sat down.
he quickly dropped his confident , cool face and let a wide grin bless his features , "perfect!!! she said yes! i walked up and acted real calm and collected ,and she didnt know i was nervous at all!!"
pansy and lorenzo smiled at him as the other boys just ignored him , uninterested. "thats great theo! so are you gonna be able to sleep now?" enzo laughed.
"like a baby." theodore grinned.
3K notes · View notes
python333 · 11 months
Note
HAI! i rlly like your platonic 141 fics and I'm wondering if we could get some more dad price and/or brother gaz sleepy cuddles? :3
stretched too thin — python333
— — — —
synopsis gaz notices you overworking yourself one night and decides to step in before you end up pulling an all-nighter.
relationships platonic!gaz & gn!reader.
characters gaz.
word count 2.05k
warnings 2nd person pov [you/yours/yourself], usage of pet names [love, darling], usage of c/n [code name/call sign].
note oh my god im so sorry i disappeared for like. a month. ill try my best to not be gone for more than a week at a time, but with all of my schoolwork and just over all stress ive been experiencing lately, i dont know if ill be able to get fics out every week :< ill try my best though! please accept this fic as an apology—its another big bro gaz one!! special shoutout to everyone else who has an older sibling thats very distant with them, you and me are in the same boat fr!! also, last thing—im thinking about making a discord server where i announce when fics are being written and published and stuff, but i dunno if yall would join or anything, so if u would pls lmk!!
Tumblr media
You haven’t left your office in five hours. 
Recently—just about two days ago—you finished up an assignment fairly quickly and, as a result, had to write a detailed report of said assignment. It went over the mission you’d gone on, and listed off every major detail you could think of, though because you just can’t give yourself a break you were constantly thinking of other details you might’ve missed even though there was little chance you’d missed anything.
The mission wasn’t anything too important, honestly. It was originally going to be a week-long camp-out reconnaissance by an enemy task force’s base, obtaining information on their schedule and what they did throughout the day and whatnot. However, only a day into the mission, the small squad of soldiers that had accompanied you saw another small military group observing the same group you’d been observing.
So, naturally, you observed them as well. Aren’t you just the best multi-tasker?
The task force eventually found out about the other group, just a day later, while your squad was still in the clear to continue your observations. So, your mission had quickly come to a close—but, because of the circumstances under which the mission had come to a close, you were required to write an extremely detailed report on the other group and the group you’d been observing.
It would be an understatement to say you were tired. You’re exhausted.
Between the non-stop writing, the coffee sitting on your desk that’s been microwaved five times and has been refilled thrice, and the uncomfortable chair you’ve sat in that you have yet to replace, you’re extremely exhausted. Your movements are sluggish, your fingers aren’t as swift on the keyboard of your computer as they usually are, and worst of all—you still have more to write. 
Your eyes stung and felt dry, your hands felt like they were going to stop working completely at any moment, and you were overall just exhausted. 
You look over at the clock on your desk, and it reads 02:28 AM, indicating that you would only have about four hours to sleep if you went to bed now. I’m too far into this report to stop now, You tell yourself, sighing as you blink slowly at your computer screen, If only my vision didn’t keep getting blurry… 
Suddenly, you hear a knock at the door. Your eyebrows furrow together in confusion, and for a second you think you’re hallucinating until the knock sounds once more. 
Reluctantly, with a voice raspy from not using it almost all day, you call out, ��Come in!” 
Your voice is softer and quieter than you’d like it to be, but it doesn’t matter too much to you at this moment—at least, not in your foggy mind that still begs you for sleep, even when you have far more of your report to finish. 
The door opens with a creak, and in walks Gaz. 
“Sarg,” He greets you, not bothering to close the door behind him as he walks up to your desk, “Pleasure to see you for the first time in, what… three days?” 
“Two days and eighteen hours,” You correct him, taking a moment to crack your stiff knuckles, not taking your eyes off of your monitor, “And you know you don’t have to call me ‘sarg’ or ‘sergeant’ or anything. We’re the same rank.” 
Gaz promptly ignores you, “Right, well, anything over a day is way too long for me to go without seeing you. Why’re you all cooped up in here on your computer?”
“‘Cause I need to write a report on my assignment,” You briefly explain, before lightly goading Gaz, “Not all of us need a shit ton of attention every day like you do.” 
“Ehh,” Gaz theatrically makes a thinking face, before shrugging, “Not sure what you mean by ‘us’, but alright.” 
“By ‘us’, I mean everyone but you.” 
“Surely that doesn’t include you, right?” 
“It does.” 
Gaz gasps quietly at your reply, before dramatically responding, “Oh, you can’t be serious.”
“I absolutely can,” You hum, finally taking your eyes off of your computer screen to look up at Gaz, “Is it so hard for you to believe that I don’t need to talk to you every waking hour?” 
“It is, actually,” Gaz scoffs, “Because I know that you do need to talk to me every waking hour.” 
“Uh, no I don’t,” You childishly argue, raising an eyebrow at Gaz.
“Uh, yes you do,” Gaz immaturely argues back, crossing his arms, “Look me in the eyes and tell me that the past two days and eighteen hours haven’t been shit because I haven’t given you any attention.”
You open your mouth to form a response but quickly close it, realizing that yeah, actually, I kind of do crave his attention. 
Fuck.
“You’re not the only person that gives me attention,” You point out, hoping to find some way to change the subject.
“Sure, but you like the attention I give you the most,” Gaz hums, leaning forward to rest his crossed arms on your desk opposite of where you sit.
“You don’t know that.”
“Then tell me that I’m wrong,” Gaz challenges you.
You narrow your eyes at him, glaring at him for a moment before sighing, “You suck.”
“Maybe I suck, but you look like you haven’t slept for the past week,” Gaz points out, “You look exhausted, by the way. And dehydrated. Actually, you just look like the human embodiment of a headache.” 
“What the fuck?” 
“I mean that in the most loving, non-offensive way possible.”
“You come into my office, accuse me of needing attention from you, then you insult me by calling me the human version of a headache?”
“It wasn’t an insult!” Gaz raises his hands in surrender, before sighing, “I’m being serious. You look dead, [c/n]. You need sleep.” 
“What I need is to finish this report,” You huff out, beginning to turn your attention back to your computer, before Gaz’s hand is quickly placed on your chin and forces you to look back at him. 
“No, what you need is some rest,” Gaz argues, more serious this time, taking his hand off of your chin—something you shouldn’t miss nearly as much as you do, the warmth of his hand fading far too quickly from your face—and bringing it back to rest on the desk. 
“Maybe you need rest, Gaz.”
“Sure I do,” He shrugs, “But I’m only going to sleep if you do.” 
You raise an eyebrow at him, “Really? You’re pulling that card?”
“I am.” 
You stare at him for a moment, mentally weighing your options, before sighing and bringing your elbows up to the table so that you can place your forehead in your hands.
On one hand, if you stay in your office you can finish up your report before four and then go to sleep, and hope that you magically feel active even with just an hour or two of sleep in the morning. On the other hand, if you go to sleep now, so does Gaz, and then you both get more than just two hours of sleep. 
After another moment of consideration, you huff out a frustrated breath and mutter, “Fine.” 
Gaz smiles down at you and walks around your desk to your side of it, holding out a hand for you to grab to help yourself up from your chair and using his free hand to save your report and power off your monitor. 
You take his hand and stand up, your legs a little weak and balance iffy from sitting down for so long, but within the next few minutes you’re sure you’ll be able to properly walk. You let go of his hand once you’re positive you won’t fall over, and once he sees that you’re able to walk, Gaz silently walks towards the door of your office. Just as quietly, you follow him. 
He turns off the lights for you and lets you walk out of the office first, locking the door from the inside and closing it once you’re out. Once he’s done, he takes the lead again and you follow him down to his sleeping quarters. It’s not too long of a walk there, only two minutes at most.
Once you’re there, Gaz opens the door and lets you walk in first. Once you’re inside and Gaz has closed the door, you shrug off your camouflage patterned jacket and toe off your already loosened tan boots, leaving you in just your camouflage cargo pants and army green undershirt.
You look down at your pants with a frown, knowing from experience that sleeping in them was incredibly uncomfortable and left you regretting your whole existence the morning after, but before you could even look over at Gaz to tell him of your situation, you felt something being thrown at you. 
You immediately turn your attention to the item that had been hurled at you—the item in question being a pair of gray sweatpants, some that would probably be a little bit looser than you’d prefer on your figure—and then look over at Gaz with a questioning look. 
“Figured you wouldn’t wanna sleep in that,” Gaz shrugs, nodding to your cargo pants in response to your nonverbal confusion. 
You hum in appreciation, not wanting to talk too much at the moment, instead waiting for Gaz to look away before slipping off your pants and replacing them with the sweatpants Gaz had thrown at you. The fit isn’t as uncomfortable as you thought they’d be—they’re loose and hang low on your hips, just like you thought they would, of course, but they don’t feel nearly as weird as you thought they would.
Once you’ve tightened the strings on the waist of the pants, you get into Gaz’s bed, pulling the covers up and over yourself. Gaz quickly settles into the bed next to you, quickly getting himself comfortable under the sheets, and pulling the covers up and over his shoulders in one swift movement.
He gets closer to you, so close that his chest presses against your back and you can feel the tip of his nose ghosting over the top of your head. He wraps one arm over your body to pull you impossibly closer to him, and his other arm snakes underneath the side of your body so that both of his arms are wrapped around you.
He hums contently and his thumb rubs small circles into your clothed stomach, the action—despite being small—causing your stomach to warm up almost immediately. 
“Comfortable, darling?” Gaz asks quietly, pressing a soft kiss to the top of your head. 
“Very,” You mumble back, trying to subtly lean your head back against Gaz in hopes of getting at least one more kiss. Noticing your efforts, he huffs out a small laugh and presses another gentle kiss right at the edge of your hairline before pressing one last one to your forehead. 
Even with the comforting atmosphere, you can’t find it within yourself to fully relax, your body still tense and stiff underneath the blanket. Gaz, just like he did with your “subtle” movements, notices and frowns. 
“Just sleep,” Gaz tiredly mumbles into the top of your head, “You have to get up in three hours. The sooner you sleep, the more sleep you get.” 
You don’t respond, instead simply sighing and forcing your eyes closed. You do have to admit, it’s nice being able to actually close your eyes for something other than blinking, and closing your eyes for longer than half a second has made you realize that they were even drier than you thought they were. 
Exhausted and ready to finally sleep, you eventually get to a point where you no longer need to force your eyes shut, and as a result, your whole body relaxes for the first time in almost six hours. 
“G’night, love,” Gaz murmurs, feeling your body relax next to his. You hum in acknowledgment of his words, not finding the energy within yourself to properly respond, instead finding yourself drifting off into a deep sleep. 
And if four hours later, Gaz wakes up and simply lies there, not waking you and instead letting you get some more sleep despite you having to be up soon, nobody has to know.
Tumblr media
299 notes · View notes
alicentsgf · 2 years
Text
ok so fans who hate alicent LOVE to say shit like "book alicent was beefing with a child lol" totally unironically. and it just confuses me. like Bro... all f&b tells us is she Stopped Being Nice to rhaenyra after aegon was born (when viserys showed no sign of naming him heir). because, reportedly, she was originally kind to rhaenyra. apparently kind enough for at least one or two people to note a sudden change in demeanor.
and like im sorry. is it that crazy that when alicent began to understand rhaenyra and her own son were going to be pitted against each other in the future she chose aegon and distanced herself from rhaenyra? she wasnt "beefing with a child" like i feel thats so clearly just a little joke someone made thats been taken at face value and regurgitated. because its not true. or at least f&b gives us no indication of it - we're never told about her acting maliciously toward a young rhaenyra. in fact i dont think we're given much indication they really interacted at all. and anyway, wouldnt it have been worse for her to continue to keep rhaenyra close ? so she could try and manipulate her?? people make book alicent into this great seductress and manipulator and theres basically no textual evidence to support it. if anything i feel like alicent distancing herself shows she very possibly DID genuinely care about rhaenyra once, perhaps enough to worry her attachment might undermine her cause to prioritise aegon in some way. and this is only further supported by rhaenyra's decision to spare alicents life later when the rest of the greens became dragon snacks.
then theres the fact book alicent was the one who asked viserys to betroth aegon to rhaenyra. why would she do that? a woman from a house with such close ties to the faith no less. she asked when aegon was 6 and she must have known by that point viserys was likely never going to name aegon heir - imo she was exhausting options to try and protect her children. no matter what choices aegon made he had every chance of becoming a symbol others would use, forcing rhaenyra to make an example of him to maintain control. marrying them to each other would do a lot to avoid that eventuality. it was both a smart political match and what Targaryen tradition demanded. viserys was convinced alicent was only acting out of ambition which is why he rebuffed her, but we're repeatedly shown viserys is kind of an idiot. especially politically.
theres this Obsession with the idea alicents characterisation was changed so dramatically for the show. 'i wish they'd made her like book alicent' they did...? they made her a victim who is scared and anxious and bitter. theres nothing to suggest that wasnt who book alicent was. everything we know of her is filtered through layers of bias - her story told by men who dont give a shit what she felt or desired. and what? you dont like it because you wanted her to be some one dimensional villian? because doubling down of f&bs oft misogynistic, cardboard cutout representation of her would have been So great. like please, i get that so much of f&b can be interpreted a whole bunch of ways but 'alicent the evil step mother' is the most basic, boring interpretation. it shows no depth of thought at all. theres at least a few clues in there as to who she Actually might have been, if you bother to look.
its just insane to me honestly. you read that book and thought she was pure evil? this woman who doted on her daughter and grandchildren so completely that her grandson's murderers knew to find them in her rooms. this woman who spent her last moments embracing death, pining for her dead children and speaking fondly of the old man she used read to as a girl. its really not that hard to percieve book alicent as a trapped and embittered woman desperately scared for the lives of her children. seriously. where is the critical thought? the empathy?? im so tired.
263 notes · View notes
maya-meow · 2 years
Text
the contract
⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰
featuring: jade x gn! reader, azul x gn! Reader, floyd x gn! Reader
Tumblr media
Not proof read
⊱ ────── {.⋅ ✯ ⋅.} ────── ⊰
You were working on your homework in the mostro lounge and god you were tired. How long were you studying? You didn't remember. Floyd asked you to come here. You had to no idea why, he probably just wanted to talk to you! Well thats what you thought..
He took such a long time untill they where there, that you started studying here. if he isn't here you could beter make yourself usefull...out of no where you felt 2 arms wrapping around your waist "Shrimpy..we need to talk" Floyd said. He made your stand up..and before you were 2 other persons...Jade and Azul. they looked kinda mad, you wonderd what was wrong. “is..everything alright?’’ “we can beter ask you that...” floyd whisperd in your ear. he was still standing behind you.
“Floyd, be nice...” azul placed a hand on your shoulder and said: "[name] listen, you need to rest” you looked confused. ”what do you mean?” jade also got closer to you. “you need sleep, look at yourself, your exhausted.” “what do you mean? im not and if i do i will be fine!” you replied. floyd lost his temper because of your awnser. he turned you around to make you look at him. “why don't you understand?! we care about you shrimpy! we love you......and want to care about you, why won’t you accept that?!’’ you were speechless. before you even knew, there were tears spilling from your eyes. maybe it was because he was squeezing your arm a little to hard or because no one ever told you that, you didn’t know. 
jade walked up to you from behind and wrapped his arms aroud your waist. “floyd....” he said "ah....im so sorry, shrimpy!! im so so sorry, i just want you to accept our love....” floyd said while wiping your tears away with his thumb. 'Dont worry your pretty head about it, Shrimpy. Its going to be okay soon, please don't cry..." Floyd said as he tried to calm you down.
When he saw you calmed down a bit. Jade, who was next to your ear looked at floyd and gave a signal to azul.
"My love..listen I know its hard for you, but we can all fix this for you with one simple contract." Azul said. "Contract..?" you said. “yes, we can help you with this.." jade whisperd in your ear.
"Im..not sure if that will help" azul stept closer to you. "Darling..we are sure it will help. We will take all your worries away. You don't even have to think~ we will take care of you.."
"It will be beter for you shrimpy!~" you weren't sure about that.. "what do i have to do in return?" "You just have to stay with us! Forever~" jade said. "And what if i don't?" You said that before you could even think. "Then you break the contract, are you sure you want to know what happens then..?" Azul lifted your chin up so you could look him in the eyes. You rather not.. "well, not really.." "thats what i thought <3" as he said that he lets go of your chin
The 3 stood before you. Azul in the middle while holding the contract.
"What will it be, darling?~"
140 notes · View notes
juli19varez · 10 months
Text
Sur...prise? | Alejandro Balde X Reader
Tumblr media Tumblr media
summary: alejandro tried to do a surprise to you, but... well.
warnings: fem!reader, attempt to make it funny, reader described to be overworked (not too explicitly), fluff.
author's note: this was a request but my app excluded all of a sudden 😭 anyways, really liked that request and i made it a little more longer than i wanted (still good i swear) hope you like it and sorry for any mistakes <3 (requests open)
it was almost midnight, you were still studying on your dorm for your next exams, almost sleeping on your books, when you heard a knock on the door. confused and exhausted, you got up to see who was there at such a time. when you opened the door, you could see alejandro smiling, while carrying some bags with him, your eyes widened.
"ale, what the hell are you doing here?!" you said whispering. you knew the rules of the dorm very well. no one from the men's dorms could go to the women's dorms after ten o'clock.
alejandro grinned, entering your room. "i was bored, so i was thinking 'why not go visit mi princesa preciosa?' and here i am!" he said proudly, putting the bags on your desk.
you sighed closing the door, approaching him quickly. "you know the rules here and how much this is dangerous! are you crazy?" you whispered, touching his chest. ale looked down, smirking. "maybe i am, but it was worth the risk," he whispered, giving a little peck at your lips, making you blush.
ale smiled, taking your hand. "come on, i bought you presents, dont be mad at me" he pouted giving you puppy eyes, you shook your head in disbelief. ale pulled you closer, hugging you.
"okay, I'm sorry, that must be some stress because of the finals." you sighed, hugging him back tightly. he stroked your hair, nodding.
"I know that, that's why I'm here." you looked at him confused as he goes to grab the bags again, handing them to you. "open up!" opening the bags, you saw a stuffed animal, and the other, some chocolates.
"I know how stressed you get with these things and overwork yourself, and i cant be by your side all the time, so I bought that bear so you could use some company, he's even using my perfume!" he pointed, looking happy. "and the chocolates... well, you love chocolate."
you smiled, looking at him happily. "you're literally the best boyfriend ever!" he chuckled as you started to kiss all his face, hugging him like a koala. "wow, you really do love me, hm?" you nodded, feeling his arms around you.
"uhm... we just have one problem..." ale hid his face on the crook of your neck. you murmured telling him to continue. "i can't get back to my dorm right now, you know? and im really tired right now... and you need to rest a little, dont you think?"
you tried to say something to complain, but knew he was right, it was almost impossible to leave the building while the guards were everywhere, and wouldn't be a bad idea to sleep together after so much time studying. you nodded, leading him to your bed. "just this time, you troublemaker, don't get used to it." he laid beside you, babbling something you didn't really paid attention, too focused turning the lights on your side off.
you turned to face him, smiling at his sleepy face. "good night, amor" he kissed your nose, hugging you by the waist, resting his head on the top of yours. "good night, preciosa."
8:00am. you heard someone knocking on your door again, you tried to get up, but alejandro was hugging you tight, it made you smile. when you were about to get back to sleep, you heard someone outside.
"y/n!!! you promised to us that we would study together this morning! open up, girl!" your eyes widened realizing it was your friends, you whispered a 'holy shit' when you glanced back to ale, who was still sleeping peacefully by your side.
"u-uhm... one second!!! im... im in the bathroom!" you said back, trying to wake alejandro up. "please, wake up amor" you begged, and finally he opened his eyes, stretching himself and smiling tired. "good morn-"
"no time for it!! hide in the bathroom, right now" you whisper shouting to him, amost pushing him inside there. he looked so confused that made you feel bad, you murmured 'sorry' for him all the time while he just chuckled. "I'll explain later, just don't make any sound until i open the door again." he nodded, and you headed to the girls, still knocking on the door.
"why did you take so long?" "sorry, i was going to take a shower, and then you two appeared." you smiled awkwardly, trying to hide your nervousness. you took a little look até the gifts of the last night, at the same time your friends did. oh no.
"OMG! who gave you this?! this is so cute!!!" they screamed in awe, looking at the heart shaped box with chocolates.
"i-i.... uhm, someone not really important! just a... guy i know..." you grabbed the bear and the box quickly, putting them behind you. "ooh, come on! tell the truth."
"i-it was a guy i met sometime ago... i like h-him, you know?" you said shyly, feeling your cheeks burning, the two girls continued to say how cute and romantic that was. you interrupted them to make some bad excuse to cancel your plans, and they left.
you sighed in relief, hearing the bathroom door crack. "so... you like me?" alejandro hugged you from behind, kissing your red cheek. you laughed, pulling him off. "shut up!"
49 notes · View notes
didiersdragon · 2 years
Text
honestly i think about younger lloyd sort of copying/following the ninja around like a little duckling wayyy too much so im just gonna. dump em here. (fair warning, it might be long)
at first, i dont think any of them realise it- not even lloyd, that he's doing it. nya notices it first. they're repairing the bounty but she's watching as lloyd follow a few feet behind cole as the other works on moving planks of wood. lloyd looks like he doesn't know what to do so he's just copying the earth master, and he grabs one plank in his tiny hands and waddles after cole. nya watched this go on and has to hold back a laugh she sees cole flopping down on the ground in exhaustion, and a few moments of contemplating later lloyd following suit. both starfished.
i dont think they were all besties yet, but the ninja has accepted that this little gremlin is gonna be the green ninja and they're going to have to take care of him. maybe this is one of the few things that makes them realise, yeah this is Lord G's kid but holy shit he's just a kid.
and lloyd's also slowly accepting them. finding out he's the green ninja and his destiny made him mellow out a bit with his more, "evil-doings" (but not completely though)
zane's the next to notice. he's finished up dinner and the ninja have a rule that whoever didn't help in cooking will have to help clean. so a lot of the time, zane sits at the table or the couch and watches them clean up. sure, he's itching to help and he doesn't get tired even after cooking but master wu insists that its to build fairness within the team- to the other ninjas dismay.
he's seated at the dinner table this time as the others are clearing up and preparing for dessert when he notices lloyd.
the little one is watching jay, who is watching cole, who is leaving the room with a pile of plates. then he sees jay's hand creep towards the slice of pie that cole stated quite clearly to "do not touch it. no, Jay, especially not you." he sighs, already prepared for what's to come next. but what he was suprised by, was seeing little lloyd do the same thing but towards nya's slice.
right before either of them could reach it though, a loud shout startles them both enough to let out squeaks (one quieter than the other) as cole comes back in. jay has already made a break for it while lloyd simply disappears under the table.
zane couldn't help his own laughter at the whole thing, waving off a confused nya who is double confused when she finds lloyd under the table. he was amused and warmed by the behaviour of their youngest brother and made a note to himself to be more self-disciplined. preparing for when lloyd will decide to follow him. (nya does end up giving lloyd her slice anyway)
kai notices it when it's happening to him. they're out in the market and he's busy bargaining with the sellers over prices. the rest of the ninja are there as well but they each went seperate ways to do their own business.
he feels someone's gaze and turns to find a little blond head quickly looking away and (attempting to) hide in the crowd. he's surprised to see the little guy still nearby. he thought the kid would've run away by now and got caught stealing candy again (the candy sellers still glare at them when they pass by) or stayed with nya.
he snorts when he sees the kid yell as he's knocked onto his butt by the crowd and whistles to get his attention. lloyd turns red, embarrassed at being caught.
when he makes his way to where kai is standing, he's got the biggest pout and a deep frown. without saying anything, kai reaches out a hand and watches the multitudes of emotions that pass over the kid's face.
once, lloyd would've be too prideful to take it but after kai saving him from the volcano, he trusted the fire master more than he realised. so he took his hand. and for the rest of their trip at the market, kai would send short glances and feel his heart warm at the sight of little lloyd holding his hand; sometimes toying with his fingers, or just shaking it when he wanted attention and at one point when kai was taking too long, he had leaned bodily against the ninja with his head against his hip and kai had to hold his tears and teases back.
yeah just. ninja being big siblings and lloyd being a kid. i just think its adorable lmao
i do also think that this habit would still be present when he's older as well. maybe not as much but he just does it subconsciously compared to when he did it to be like his siblings !
294 notes · View notes
scatterplot-official · 2 months
Note
12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?
44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?
50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?
54. Favourite store?
55. Favourite blog?
60. Ever won a competition? For what?
66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?
73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?
75. Favourite animal?
78. Favourite ice cream flavour?
90. Name a person you love?
100. How are you feeling?
116. Are you listening to music right now?
117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?
119. Favourite book?
133. Favourite lyrics right now?
(If these are too many than just pick whichever ones you want to answer ^^)
44. Trip to outer space or bottom of the ocean?
The sea! My dad lived in Florida as a kid and had an official suba license when he was 12! I really wanna see all the cool things he has.
50. What was the colour of the last hoodie you wore?
Black, it was for a marching band competition I was in (We won 1st in parade!)
54. Favourite store?
There's a bookstore in town I adore, I got my moth encyclopedia there.
55. Favourite blog?
Everyone in my pinned 🫶
60. Ever won a competition? For what?
Marching! Thats the only one I can remember though there may be more.
66. Do you like your tumblr friends more than your real friends?
Currently yes, Im having very confusing problems rn with my Irls. ily 5ever random, theyre my only irl who isnt being weird rn.
73. Do you sleep with stuffed animals?
Yes! Rn I have Reginald the duck, Cathathy the Cuthulu, Bennedict the Bee, Barbie the possum and Holidog the Holiday World mascot.
75. Favourite animal?
My ouppies! Also snakes and kitties and bats and dinos and hyeenas.
78. Favourite ice cream flavour?
Vanilla, but I dont really like icecream all that much.
90. Name a person you love?
My aunt 🫶Shes on my side no matter what and Im her favourite nephew.
100. How are you feeling?
Very tired. A lot has happened recently and its so exhausting.
116. Are you listening to music right now?
Yep! 8 Graves, Bored to Death
117. Do you like chicken noodle soup?
Very rarely. Im very picky about chicken but I love soup.
119. Favourite book?
Negative Space - B.R. Yeager (I ordered his other two books im very excited)
133. Favourite lyrics right now?
Victim To The Sands Of Time, Hourglass, Set It Off (Im getting it tattooed)
12. What are your 5 favorite songs right now?
(bc i linked the songs too)
6 notes · View notes
iamthat-iam · 1 year
Note
hey Bry, i hope you’re doing good, i wanted to ask for help because im tired of this, like i dont know who else to ask ( 😔 ) could you please tell me what i'm doing wrong?  (long text ahead)
i’ve been into Non Dualism for a while, not that much tho, i was into the Law of Assumption community and i was having that point of view and the i discovered ND. I felt like i was being blessed because the main idea of Non Dualism is so freeing. I consumed all types of ND contents you can imagine, i was in every corney of the internet looking for info and different perspectives, and i was doing…. meh. I was learning but i had my up and downs but i was slowly “detaching from ego”. Then something happened i had a few problems with a class of mine and i felt like a fell from the progress that i had. I was trying to read more and more content to try to make me understand that “hey its ok”, ofc that never worked because my teacher accused me of plagiarism and the owrse part is that is true but is not bcs of bad reasons i just used AI  and wanted to make my assignments easier and my mental health was awful for me to complete them. Then i found out that my grades were low and i dont know if im going to fail, or repeat my semester, and the worse, i dont want mynparents to find out and pay for those classes. I feel awful because they’re really expensive and i just want to solve this. Believe me, im so tired of reading content and not knowing what to do. I’ve tried every “tecnique” to slowly detach from ego, but i just can’t stop thinking about these problems, they’re haunting me like crazy. I know this is just ego but, ive had so many anxiety attacks because of this like i don’t get it. I'm sorry if im sounding too demanding, im literally asking in the best way possible, what else could i do?
A lot of bloggers say “you don´t need to understand this, is your ego worrying” and others say “slowly question yourself what ego says or sees and go back to your origin” that gets me so confused and i'm exhausted. im so lost and i just want to delete everything and feel better. i know ND, is not about this, it shouldn’t make me feel like this, is just very simple. i just have too many problems like Bry i am really concerned, my mothers finances haven’t been the best and i don’t want her to pay a lor of money. I'm terrified to let go of this desire to change my grade circumstances, because I'm scared that if I do, nothing will change and everything around me will only worsen, and it feels like I've got such little time to change things. I know it might b the best to “let go” and do nothing but like, what if it stays the same. I dont even understand when people say “let it be” or i saw a girl saying “if you have a problem, dont do thing to it. ignore it and it will solve” like how??? i feel defeated and i just want to be free. im so scared to be in this position when the week ends, or by the month ends. im so lost. i feel like i only know this intellectual, but when the day passes and i say to myself “I AM” i just can’t feel it, i feel like a limited body. i give up on trying to achieve something,Ego seems so exhausting and scary and terrifying. i want to leave everything behind and be gentle with myself. what can i do? what should i do?
thank you bry if you read this fully, i really try to follow your blog and i like your kindness towards ppl. i hope u have a nice day
Im doing good ty for asking!
You have to take a leap of faith. I know it's scary to let go of control and trying to change things but if you don't, you will continue to feel like this and the problems will continue to exist. Trying to change a problem is you acknowledging that there's even a problem in the first place. Worrying about these problems are just keeping them there, because you keep acknowledging that they exist.
Your true self doesn't have problems! So when you know yourself as you really are, and are not identified with the person dealing with such and such issues, they have to go away. There's no possibility of things staying the same because everything appears and disappears based on what you are aware of.
Surrender. Just know that everything will work out in the end (because everything is already perfect).
22 notes · View notes
saszaszeszi · 15 days
Text
Im so fucking sleepy yet I can't sleep. Way too much thoughts. So maybe ill rant and get them out. It feels bad to talk about things like this, but oh well. I'm already exhausted emotionally and confused and all this stress makes me barely have any sleep at night (if im lucky enought to sleep tho).
The way they all lied to me and never told me anything. Three. Three different persons knew about it and no one tried to confront or ask me shit, just made their little theories. I understand one of them knew my blog. And i understand they checked it cause they noticed my mental state shrinking. But at the same time lying about not checking it? After accidentally leaving a heart on my intro post another (probably, maybe that was truth) lie that "they checked their followers" and accidentally went on my blog? I mean how dump do you think I am? Who follows you? Especially when you don't post a shit. Anyway sending screenshots of my vents to others is understable, but at the same time would be cool if i got to know about it all like in the span of a hour or two. Not several days later. Also some of the things i saw on screenshots just hurted me. "Like, i like him as a friend, i really do but how tf do i handle jirai". Bro i told you I'm jirai before we became friends. And why you act jirai is the problem? I still feel hurt. I still dont even feel like i can trust any of their words. He himself told others to talk about their emotions and all and dont give silent treatment. What i did to deserve this hypocritic behaviour from him? Litteraly both of these two others he told about this (not suprised that he told it after basically i got to know from them and not him and told him about it) accoused me of trying to distance them from the rest? Also one accoused me of bpd and being a yandere? I mean the bpd one and yandere was basically a child, but it still hurts. In the instance of me having stronger ed than usual and getting all this info randomly and litteraly needing to confront everyone and talk to them for longer amount of time to get to the maybe truth? I mean he lied way to many times and his promises seem hollow. I probably need time to get used to it but oh well. Im just tired. Tired of walking on eggshells to not make anyone uncomfortable nor to make them randomly worried or "try to make me say it". Say it yourself young man and dont try to force me by manipulation to say it to you. It all just made me relapse and suicidal again. I hate it. I hate them. But why i still care and im way to worried about them? Litteraly im worried after the tone of their message is wrong. Yet they dont seem to really care nor worry about me. Well maybe they do, but i dont feel it. Maybe leaving would be better. I would had another reason to end it, well loose reason to stay so itll add to reasons to end.
Ngl won't tag it as its more of private thing and not wanna get it seen by more people, but still some attention and reaction would be cool.
5 notes · View notes
sukirichi · 29 days
Note
Aaaaaaaa sukiiiiiii why you do this to meeeee 😭😭
Brain mush, im very exhausted so im sorry if ill rant dhdhajdjs
The whole rin diary part - sparked lots of joy 🥺🥺🥺
This part right after
Tumblr media
This does not spark joy 😒 like really? really? After we kept admitting we still love rin even while being with omi we go ahead and say that? Especially after reading the damn diary... Really?
This update made my heart shatter for our dearly idiot rin even more.. He keeps thinking we just... Wont love him if we know who he really when (jokes on him we do know) and it just.. It really breaks me
Tumblr media
The fact he truly looks that low on himself to the point he believes we are with him just cause hes a prince and if he never was we wouldnt even notice him... Bruh i just.. I want to hug him.. Royal life truly shattered him mentally to the point he has no self esteem uh..
This part tho caught my attention:
Tumblr media
He keeps trying to push us away but perhaps cause he's noticeable tired, I mean its described at o e point that he has dark circles under his eyes, what i believe its because hes been sleeping on the couch or something because he refuses to sleep in the same bed as iris (since he did kinda hinted that she had the bed all to herself). And perhaps thanks to him being exhausted he just cant stop himself fron letting little truths come out, he didnt even seem to notice it while we truly did.
Im still disappointed? Bitter? Ahahahha that the baby is staying dhshshhdhoas he's our hubby man i dont want him to be having some other bitch's baby when neither he or she wanted it 🙃 like please just do something good for the story iris and go ahead and lose it 🤣🤣 at this point only the queen will be pissed and we love that royal bitch pissed 🤣🤣
Sorry i wanted to give a better review but damn my job has been killing me ahahahah thank you so much for another update tho, these even tho they kill me 🤡 in a way always cheer me up and make me having something to look forward for.
Also yes kuroooooo destroy the bitchhhhh ahahhaha
the rin diary part!! man I remember having to like sit down for a long time just so I could use the perfect words LIKE WHY DID NO ONE TELL ME ITS HARD TO BE POETIC LMFAO. not that it DID become poetic but it was the best I could pull out of my ass lmaoooo. omg okay I get that it doesn’t spark joy but hear me out!! at that point we’d already fallen for kiyoomi and yknow like… we already know that rintaro hasn’t been that good anyway, and we’re finally choosing what’s right, what’s BETTER (because dtd!yn has always been a character who will most likely end up doing what she thought was right and its really hard to change her mind lol but it’s just!! a matter of what feels right in that moment!!) and in that moment choosing kiyoomi and finally accepting that he has feelings for us felt like the right one! and the diary you know, it really is confusing cuz like – WE LITERALLY HAD JUST BEGUN OUR THING WITH KIYOOMI AND EVERYTHING IS GOING WELL then we see that our husband has always been secretly writing his feelings about us LIKE THE TIMING HONESTLY CAN’T GET ANY WORSE LOL
oh yeah… rin’s inferiority complex has just completely gotten worse because all his insecurities have gone from ten to a hundred. like he somehow always felt like he wasn’t good enough but to know that he was never a prince?! my boy needs therapy. and yes omg that part!! I know during the scene where he kicked us out our room was trying to imply that he wants to share the same bed as iris but naur!! my boy rin won’t even touch her within a ten foot pole in that moment, he just stays on the couch and can barely sleep because he sent us to belleview manor of all places. I just know he stayed up all night thinking about what we’re doing with kiyoomi and well… his imaginations are right because we’re making out with him lol. LMAOOOO I KEEP FORGETTING ABOUT THE BABY I think its bcos iris has been off-screen for such a while now that lowkey I forgot she and the queen existed (in other terms I’m just too excited to write about runaway rin and yn!! and I’m such a pea brain lol)
also no omg!! I hope you’re getting some rest and a well-deserved break though! and thank you so muchhh IM SO HAPPY YOU’RE ENJOYING DTD HEHEHEHE as always I appreciate you for showing so much love and I’m sending you more back!! <33
6 notes · View notes
Text
Had another au idea for tsctir that involves HYJ going back in time (about 5-6 years) using the wishing stone, like before, except the wishing stone requires a payment of equal value to the wish (in this case, its at the cost of most of his remaining life) and he goes back in time with his current body.
So, HYJ shows up in the past (scars, injuries, leg injury and all) several months before the awakening broker incident can take place and desperately tries to get in contact with his brother. When he finally does (im thinking that HYJ manages to get HYHs attention cause hes waiting around his brothers guild for him to get back from a dungeon), HYH is shocked (his face twisting with dread? And maybe HYJ notes that the HYH of the future wouldnt have made the mistake of letting his emotions show on his face which makes him feel a bit nostalgic) to see his hyung in crutches and carrying injuries that he shouldnt have and looking older? more exhausted and worn down? than his hyung should be and he’s livid cause, what the hell happened while he was in the dungeon?
The change is too sudden and too severe for HYH to ignore and he has HYJ brought into his guild to get to the bottom of it. HYJ goes through the process of apologizing to HYH and talking and HYH has HYJ explain whats going on cause his hyung looks older, has injuries that couldnt have healed this much while he was in a dungeon, and his hyung uses his crutches like hes had them for a long time, and the notifications hes gotten of his hyungs current state doesnt match up with the hyung hes seeing in front of him; so HYJ gives a, very lacking, explanation (just enough to explain that hes from the future thanks to a wishing stone) but HYH accepts it cause HYJ is able to prove that its actually HYJ and not someone else using some kind of disguise.
So, due to everything surround his future hyungs situation (and how could he abandon his hyung when he looks so Tired?), HYH has HYJ live with him.
Its, awkward. At first. But HYJ is nurturing by nature. He knows he doesnt have long left to live. Hes not trying to get anywhere with the time he has left. Hes just, trying to do what he shouldve done for his dongsaeng. So, this time around, he doesnt hold back and he doesnt mind (though he does get bored) being confined to the house.
HYJ tells HYH lots of things about the future (his way of making it up to HYH for all the stress hed caused him pre regression) in order to help him grow his guild much more easily. And “all hyungs are equal” HYH is happy to have HYJ living with him again. His, significantly older, hyung who stays home and worries over him, cooks him meals that remind him of when they used to live together, and who dotes on him with lots of love and affection. His hyung who looks at him fondly, even if sadly at times, and treats him like a child (even more so than usual, which he blames on the larger age gap, even tho hes an adult, but its a dynamic thats oddly comforting).
During this time, HYJ realizes that he hadn’t seen HYH smile in the 8 years that they had been apart (except when hed died protecting him) and seeing his dongsaeng smile so easily and freely now just. Breaks his heart. HYH smiling an enjoying himself in his hyungs company is what gets HYJ to break his silence on what happened. He starts by apologizing, which confuses HYH cause his future hyung hasnt done anything? But the way HYJs voice wavers has HYH feeling concerned, but HYJ continues. “I dont know how id never noticed it before. Have you really not smiled in all the time we’ve been apart? Have you been happy at all?”
How had he gone so long without realizing a single thing? “I’m sorry I didnt notice how miserable youd been. I’m sorry for failing to be a proper hyung.” And maybe HYJs crying (but trying really hard not to) and HYHs trying to comfort him saying “It’s not your fault; i didnt explain anything” but “I should’ve noticed. You hadnt smiled all that time. It’d been 8 years. I dont think Id ever seen you look happy. How could I have been so blind?” And maybe he’s hugging HYH by this point and rambling “I was so caught up in my own anger after you left; so focused on how i felt that it took-“ he pauses “Yoohyun-ah. You died trying to protect me from an ss class lauchitas dragon that showed up in a d class dungeon i was in. It took you sacrificing yourself for me to realize you still cared. It took you dying for me to realize just how much i needed you in my life. How much i missed you and wanted you in it. I’m sorry for getting mad when you interfered. Im sorry for resenting you all those years. I’m so so sorry. I wish i could take all of it back. You didnt deserve any of that. I should’ve been supporting you. Im sorry. I’m sorry.” And, by this point, HYH knows that future HYJs been in dungeons and had awakened but he hadnt known all of this, but he does know that his future self wouldnt have regretted dying for his hyung. His hyung was his whole world; his life wouldnt have been worth living if hed lost his hyung. He doesnt say it though. Its not what his future hyung would want to hear.
HYJ, over the course of living with HYH (and sometime after the above scene), ends up convincing him to explain everything to the HYJ of this time. His relationship with HYH had been bad but he could still make a difference for his brother now so he does. So, instead of lecturing HYJ about the awakening broker incident (it helps that he knew it would happen ahead of time and why his hyung would even think to do such a thing), HYH apologizes and explains the situation. He explains why hes been getting in his hyungs way; why hed left; why hes cut off contact (seeing future HYJ as distraught as he was before gives him the push he needed to actually be honest about everything) . They end up talking for a long time and their conversation ends with their first hug in 3 years (and maybe an award winning act that resembles what had happened in the original timeline to prevent people from realizing anything’s changed) and a promise to keep in touch and hang out from time to time (albeit discretely; just until HYH has the best guild in Korea). And maybe HYH, at the recommendation of future HYJ, gives past HYJ an envelope containing a lot of cash and tells his hyung to pursue what he really wanted to do with his life; to get the education he had given up for HYHs sake? Idk
When future HYJ sees HYH return home, he looks much more relaxed and like a weights been lifted off his shoulders. It also makes him feel horrible again for not realizing just how much hed made his dongsaeng worry over him —how self centered and uncooperative hed been. It leaves a touch of guilt, bitter in his chest, lingering. But he also feels happy knowing that HYH wont have to suffer the way he did in the pre regression; that things wont have to get as bad as they did.
Of course there’d need to be scenes where HYH gets to enjoy being spoiled and HYJ cant say no to HYHs puppy eyes (especially cause a 20yr old is easily still like a kid in the eyes of a 30yr old); i just dont know what kinda scenes to make happen for this yet (pls let me know if you guys have any ideas)
As HYJ starts to reach the end of his life, the effects of the sacrificial wish stone starts making itself known. HYJ starts to get weaker and weaker; he tries to brush it off telling HYH not to worry, but the first time HYH comes home to find HYJ collapsed on the floor, HYH panics and forces him to see a doctor. When the doctors cant find anything wrong, HYH is about to start going off (to ask for more tests to be done), but HYJ stops him saying theres something else he needs to come clean about regarding his situation. And, when the doctor leaves, HYJ explains that the wish stone was actually a sacrificial wish stone, and he’d sacrificed most of his life in order to go back in time. This information leaves HYH feeling really distraught and he tries to find ways to increase his hyungs life span or improve things in some way, but nothing works. HYJ paid the price before regressing. But, he was able to do what hed wanted, so hes not too upset. His main worry is that HYH would feel sad, so he talks to past HYJ about everything and makes sure that he wont make the same mistakes that hed made (makes sure that his dongsaeng wont be alone this time).
When HYJ reaches the end of his life, hes already bed bound. Hed lost the strength needed to carry himself but now hes having a hard time moving his arms and anything more than talking drains him. He knows hes going to pass soon. HYH takes a vacation just to spend all of his time at his hyungs side. HYH tries to smile and keep things light hearted for his hyung, but, when HYH thinks HYJ isnt looking, HYJ catches HYH looking so sad. Then, one morning, HYJ Knows hes not going to make it to tomorrow and he lets HYH know. HYH tries to hold it together at the news and doesnt leave his side. HYJ doesnt miss the way his hands tremble at the news. The past HYJ is brought over at future HYJs request (he wanted someone to be there for HYH) and, when the time comes, HYH is sobbing and trying to give HYJ some of his own life force to keep him around but HYJ is like “No. I’m ready to move on now. Thank you for giving me the chance to make up and thank you for taking care of me and i love you and im so proud of you.” And he tells the other HYJ to take proper care of his dongsaeng and to be there for him and past HYJ nods and thanks future HYJ for helping to mend their relationship.
And, this time, HYJ is the one who gets to smile softly as he looks at his dongsaeng for the last time.
118 notes · View notes
weskin-time · 2 years
Note
this is so fucking awful and self indulgent so I can understand if you pass this one but can I get wesker w an s/o who uses hewwo speak when reallllly stressed out? I do that irl and it's a bad habit of mine but at the same time I don't wanna stop bc it low-key brings comfort
YOURE THE FIRST PERSON TO SEND ME AN ASK EVER!! THANK YOU! and dont worry, self indulgense is my specialty! im also very sorry for this being a few days late, i havent had any time to write anything because i was making an Ash Williams cosplay for a horror convention i just got back from!!!
I havent proof read this so there might be errors and mistakes! sorry!
im also writing this while very exhausted from a convention so i hope it good!! healing through fanfic >:3 i hope this is close or around anything to what you had in mind!!
when he first hears you talk like that hes gonna give you a blank look
like he would just ask you a question about what you wanted for dinner and you would respond back tiredly in that way of speaking and he would just pause for a second and look at you
"why are you speaking like that?" hes blunt
he doesnt mean it in a bad way hes just,,, confused??
so you explain to him that its a habit of yours to talk that way when youre stressed out and its a semi comforting stress reliever to you
he instantly wants to know whats stressing you out
he said he would take care of it and have it done for you if its causing you to be so stressed
even if its a person or some customers getting under your skin depending on your job
says he has ways of making them never making you stressed again
actually kinda likes the way your way of speaking changes when youre stressed
something about it dripping off your tired lips just makes him want to wrap you up like one of those cat burritos
but he also doesnt want to hear it because it means youre stressed
and he doesnt want you to be stressed
BUT AA CUTE OWO VOICE
if you can pick it up, everytime to speak he just very faintly smiles
or at least his face relaxes a bit more
even if you try to tell him its alright and that you can get it done yourself he will insist that you tell him and let him take care of it
he ushers you out of the kitchen and into the bathroom where he starts to draw a warm bath for you, will even put in a bath bomb of your choice if you wish into the bath
while youre soaking in the warm water trying to relax a bit hes out making your favorite dinner or meal
hell if you want he will make pancakes for dinner or another type of non dinner meal for you
youre sitting in the warm water and just start to melt into it
theres a knock on the door a little while later, its Al telling you your food is ready :)
so now youre full, clean, and some of the stress weight has been lifted off of you knowing your lovely partner is going to help you (or completely take care of) the thing that is stressing you
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"you didn't have to do aww that fow me you know." you say, nuzzling into Wesker's chest. He held you in his arms under the warm covers, you laying on his chest with your arms wrapped around him and his around you. Your chest felt lighter than it had when you first got home for the day, it felt fuzzier.
"I know dearest." he gave you a small kiss to your forhead.
"I weawwy mean it. you do so much fow me awweady and youwe awways busy, i dont want to make you stwessed mowe than you awe just becasue im stwessed." you shift and crane your neck to look at him in this position.
His red eyes stare into yours as a smile finds its way to his lips. "Sweetheart." he paused to kiss your nose, "You're one of the few beings worthy of leading this new world with me. your pretty little head doesnt deserve any stress what so ever, and i mean that."
You felt your face go a tad red and your heart swell. for Wesker being,,, well,, Wesker, he really could be sweet sometimes. You burried your face back into his chest causing him to chuckle, the reverberation sounding so different as you were on his chest.
"I love you dear, and that cute voice youre using." his chuckle then lowers and extends, turning into a soft purring. you shut your eyes and lean into his purring, the sound starting to lull you to sleep.
"I love you too Al."
96 notes · View notes
crowning-art · 2 years
Text
TGCF SPOILERS FINALE!
Me and 10 cuties who have been keeping up with my crazy TGCF journey after i finally finished it 2 years later lmaoo
Tumblr media
*Note that clown in the center is me and everyone knows why after seeing my wonderful, beautiful, RIDICULOUS AND OUTLANDISH theories throughout the read lmaoo
Without further ado...the finale!!
-------------------------------------------------------
Goushi really swooped in during the LAST TWO SECONDS of this huge novel and really just stole everyone's heart, huh? I love this dude
In the last second, a hand caught Feng Xin’s boot, and Feng Xin caught Mu Qing’s boot. When he looked up, he cried, “WHAT THE FUCK!!! WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!!! GUOSHI OLD SIR, PLEASE DON’T EVER LET GO, ALRIGHT!!!”
YOOO FENG XIN ACCEPTED HIS CHILD OH MY GODDD DJJDJDJDJF T-T THE CHARACTER GROWTH
THE WAY THE TABLES HAVE TURNED AHHHHH its now Xie Lian who has Jun Wu pinned and nailed down to the ground with a sword djdjdjjdjjd low key, Xie Lian really needed to do that....yknow....therapeutically lol
I love this so much cuz ya, at the end of the day, it's tiring, it's exhausting keeping up a facade and forcing yourself to be someone who u know really isn't you and I feel Jun Wu despite all he's done was very heavily a product of his situation.
“I just genuinely really miss Your Highness,” Guoshi said. “I miss the once-Kingdom of Wuyong,
I miss our people, and I miss the days before we ascended. That’s all.”
“…”
Guoshi then added, “It’s been so many years, Your Highness. Just watching you makes me tired. Very tired. How about you? Are you not exhausted?”
And yes, I get that there was still a bit of inherit evil within him which got amplified thanks to the wuyong problems but like at the end of the day, he's just a sad little meow meow
AND THEN
AND THEN
“…Have I been defeated?” Jun Wu sounded a little lost.
After a moment of silence, Xie Lian took off the bamboo hat carried on his back, took it in his hand, and covered it over Jun Wu’s face.
DJDIFNIFJFJFJFJ DO I EVEN HAVE TO SAY IT AGAIN??? HJDHDHFHFHF U KNOW WHAT IM GONNA SAY AND UGH ITS ALWAYS BACK TO THE ✨️THEMES OF KINDNESS AND LOVE✨️ BRB gonna cry some more AGAIN
Ahh I remember pointing this out a while back but Hua Cheng was always the ONLY one who really helped ground Xie Lian when he was lost and confused. Like the split emotions he kept feeling of not knowing whether to laugh or cry, all gone even when he's told the craziest news yet, aka Wu Ming identity
All of a sudden, thousands of emotions, millions of words swarmed into his head. There was gratefulness, there was shame, there was heartache, there was wild joy, but above all else, there was incurable love.
Lol u guys don't even get it, there were so many parts that were my fave here and I was trying my best to not post the whole chapter here cuz i loved EVERY part, the way Xie Lian leaped into Hua Chengs arm at the end, the cute Xianle trio bickering, just everything T-T
WTF U MEAN LIL BREAK I DO NOT NEED THIS RN PLZ DONT OH MY GODOHMYGODOHMYGOS HUA CHENG DONT U DARE DIE OH MYGOD
All of this:
Hua Cheng’s long and slender fingers gently combed through Xie Lian’s mussed hair. “Then, Your Highness, do you know why I refuse to leave this world?”
Xie Lian couldn’t understand why Hua Cheng could still be so calm at a time like this, as he was panicking so hard he was trembling. But, while feeling lost, he still simple-mindedly asked,
“Why?”
Hua Cheng replied quietly, “Because I have a beloved who is still in this world.”
Hua Cheng said quietly, “Your Highness, I understand your everything.
“Your courage, your despair; your kindness, your pain; your resentment, your hate; your intelligence, your foolishness.
“If I could, I would have you use me as your stepping stone, the bridge you take apart after crossing, the corpse bones you need to trample to climb up, the sinner who deserved the butchering of a million knives. But, I know you wouldn’t allow it.”
They really did invent love, I can't think of anything else to say to this 😭
HIS EXPRESSION MY HEART CRACKED INTO A MILLION PIECES AT THIS WHOLE SCENE BUT ESPECIALLY AT THIS LINE
Hua Cheng’s gaze was gentle and blazing, that remaining eye filled with love, and it gazed at him silently.
He's gonna be back for sure. The red string and the ashes are still there....but it's still soooo saaad
LMAOOO the heavenly officials became homeless fr I'm dying lmaoooo
ROUYE IS BACK YESSSS!!! AND UGHH XIANLE TRIO!! IM SO HAPPY THEY R TOGETHER AGAIN!! I MISSED THIER SHENANIGENS SO MUCH
Xie Lian rummaged around his sleeve and fumbled out a white silk band that was torn in half, and said joyously, “Yeah, finally, the material to fix Ruoye is found! I’ll go patch it up right now!”
However, Feng Xin stopped him. “Patch it up? You?! Forget it, what can you patch? Ask someone else to help you.” Then he turned his head and shouted, “MU QING! COME GET TO WORK!”
Pei Su and Banyue were really an underrated duo this whole book, especially with the way they guarded Ke Mo and the other ghosts lol
Pei Su and Banyue were sitting at the entrance, both of their expressions blank.
Feng Xin divorce arc lmaooo Finally it came to an end...and in a really nice and mature way. I really appreciated the way MXTX wrote Jian Lan's whole character, like she also grew as a person and is def underappreciated
However, Jian Lan withdrew her smile. “What you’ve said are all things of the past. What was love once doesn’t mean it’ll last. I’m not interested in being a charity case and a nuisance.”
And Xuan Ji! Everyone really grew up huh? (*sobbing incontrollably*)
Still don't like Pei Ming smh overgrown man child fr U go Yushi Huang for showing him whose boss!!
GUZIIII MY HEART NOOOOO I really respect LQQ for doing this
so I could only…gather a bit of the soul particles of the Green Ghost and keep them in a lamp. Now he shows up in front of me every day hugging that lamp, asking when the soul within the lamp will grow bigger! I really…”
And Guzi! Fret not! Qi Rong will be back cuz his ashes aren't destroyed!!
THE PEARLS ARE BASICALLY A GIFT FROM THE INLAWS THAT HUA CHENG HAS NOW DJJDJDJDJDJDJFJDJD
A moment later, Xie Lian nodded slowly. “It’s mine. It’s a pair of pearls my father and mother gave me when I was young.”
Lol Ling Wen's punishment thooo and the subtle hint that Ling Wen may have acc cared for the dude despite everything kinda warms my heart
Ling Wen gave a small laugh. “Your Highness, don’t say it like I would do anything for him. After all, I’m cold-blooded and recognize no loved ones, so why would I do anything like that?”
“Is that right?”
“Let it be.
I love love love the way the passage of time was described here God I don't know how to explain it but I love it
People came like the tide, then left like the tide. Mount Taicang regained its deserted lonesomeness.
Atop Mount Taicang, there used to be an enormous field of maple trees. They were all burnt down by that massive fire, but reborn after a thousand years. They were no longer the same ones Xie Lian leapt through to train once upon a time, but the landscape was the same.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAASAASASSMXKXKXJXNCJXNX AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
With three thousand Blessings Lanterns rising along with the night behind him, that man turned back and gazed at him. Robes redder than maple, skin as white as snow; between the brows of a face so handsome it couldn’t be stared at, there was still that wildness and a feral aura, a proudness that couldn’t be cut down.
There were no words. Both started walking towards the other.
A step, another step, each step faster than the next, then finally, they started running.
He ran forward whilst tears fell and stayed behind him. Xie Lian voiced this in his heart: he believed.
He believed that this man would die for him again and again, and would be reborn for him over and over. Even if he fell into the depths of hell, he would break through the abyss for his “belief”.
Last time, they spent eight hundred years running towards each other.
This time, it only took an instant to fall into each other’s embrace.
DID I CRY HERE? U BET YOUR FUNKY LIL BEAN I DID And u don't get get AGUHH it took 1000 pages for them to get to where they were AND ONLY ONE PAGE TO MEET AGAIN THE ABSOLUTE POETIC METAPHOR HAS ME LOSING MY MIND u have to read through 244 chaps to see them trying to get to each other and when they finally do..it takes less than a page for them to reunite again I AM CRYING RN
The grand final banquet in Puqi shrine, with windmaster and the fellow beggars, he xuan secretly eating with them, fengqing arguing and bantering (flirting basically -_-), heaven's eye, hualian, the heavenly officials dropping by, just everyone finally living a happy life
Tumblr media
What a story! Like what a story! Unbelievable!
This is how it started and this is how it ended
However, if people worship the divine statues of this one god and one ghost together, then there will be a miracle
Cuz their whole story is a miracle but that's the point! U can't give up! Xie Lian's story IS inspirational despite being fictional! Believing in your principles and doing the right thing, showing kindness no matter the circumstance, and growing from adversities, honestly I had so much to say but I read the post script and lmao MXTX said EVERYTHING I wanted to say!
-------------------
I'm always the kind to finish books within a day or two but I really didn't want this one to end (hence two years to read it) but God the whole experience was so incredible and tbh, I started documenting my thoughts for myself just so I can reread them later and laugh lmao but then a bunch of you guys kept up with it and it genuinely became such an exciting thing to look forward to after reading as well!!
Special shout out to @silvia-moon and @maause who were there from the beginning!! I loved every comment of yours and had a blast reading them every time 🥰
Ahhhh IM GETTING SO EMOTIONAL LIKE THIS LONG WINDING JOURNEY HAS FINALLY COME TO AN END 😭 (borderline tearing up while writing this post) but alas! Every banquet must come to an end (haha see what I did there? Hahaha....😭😭😭)
And of course there are the extras! But those shall be read some other day! In the meantime, I'm so so excited to get to drawing all my fave scenes!! I can't wait to get to that!
Until then,
Farewell 😊
26 notes · View notes
stayxlix · 9 months
Note
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
AYY MOOTERS ON MOOTERS THEY KNOW HOW TO MOOT! TUTTER PULLING TO THE PARTY IN MY CRAZY PINK WIG!!!! BEST WRITER? BEST WRITER? BEEN A FAN SINCE PART ONE!
I was getting beaten to lunacy, depression, delusion, confusion even. I got the 1st grade knowledge beat out of me with this one, i couldnt count for a sec. My vision got all blurry, thought this was chapter 17 for a minute there👹
Bitch, out the gate you be coming in HARD. You know how to set the mood, I get scared for their asses! It feels like being on drugs or something (though i aint never been on drugs, but this is how i imagine it feels like👀) I visualize like I ain't ever visualized before, put on some music reading this at night, DAYUM🛐‼️
I reread this tasty ass story atleast once every week. It's tradition at this point.
1."The physical contact was grounding—you were grounding. A lifeline anchoring Felix to the reality he so desperately needed to return to." This fucked me up😪 So beautifully written!
2. "How he'd transformed from someone potentially willing to end your life, to someone committed to protecting it at all costs." Had to pause, take a breather, and look out my window to reflect on who I am as a person, then keep reading. Absolutely Precious.
3. "Some day," he dropped his voice, "When all of this is over, I'm going to carry you back into that palace." His lips found the curve of your jaw, trailing a heated path down. "I'm going to take my time with you, princess," he nipped at the sensitive skin on your neck, causing your core to flutter with anticipation. "And then," he whispered, "I'm going to lay the world at your feet." I was hyperventilating baby I couldn't breath for shit reading this 👀
4. "Minho sighed in annoyance, as if holding a conversation with you was some sort of burden. “I didn’t want to discuss it with the others,” he snapped." TIRED, TIRED OF THE WAY HE TREATS ME. (Jk lol I get his stress but chill out, damn.)
5. "You were always mine," Felix breathed, "before we met, before all of this, you were never their princess," he leaned in, pressing his lips to your forehead. "You were always mine.” I had to stop reading and get some water, my throat dried out.
6.“You can’t,” Felix emphasized. A distant look clouded his eyes, a flash of whatever it was that had crossed his features after the nightmare seemed to resurface. “You grew up with servants to meet your needs while the rest of us bled for every scrap of food and warmth. You can’t understand, y/n. And even if you could, it won't change who I am or what I've done. The blood on my hands will never wash away.” This is where the problem occurs. Cuz what are you implying? You ate this part so much you gotta be locked away like that one song. 🗣 IM LOCKED UP THEY WONT OUT, THEY WONT LET ME OUT IM LOCKED UP🗣
7. "Go collect your friend," the man waved a hand at the door, "I will shelter you for the night. You're young, exhausted, and it looks like you've been through quite a lot." I LOVE HIM ALREADY DAMMIT
8. You knew this would not last forever with him. Nothing ever does. And you wondered if you will ever be able to accept that, even when you no longer have a choice. But in that moment, Felix was there. You extended a hand, and he was warm. He was real, and he felt more like home than anything ever had. You loved him too, and it was a feeling you did not dare let go." MY HEART! RIPPED OUT MY CHEST! I CANT BREATH! IM SOBBING!IM DEVASTATED.
IM FEELING LIKE IM ON THE LAST BITE OF MAC AND CHEESE ON THANKSGIVING, IM GUTTED, I DONT WANT IT TO BE OVER!!
But as always, let me calm down and get a lil sensitive. I love you my pookie bear❤️✨️
Your adding some good into my world with this story that i really need. Its like the same day everyday for me, then out of the blue, you pop up and you give me something to look forward to.
Like most people, there's lots of things I need to be distracted from, and you do just that for awhile❤️ I appreciate this lil story more then you could know, and I always get SO happy seeing you posted a new chapter. I can tell how much passion and effort you put into this story, and I applaud you for that🫶❤️ Take your time, take care of yourself, and feel no pressure on when you need to put a new chapter out, YOU should always come first❤️ -👹
hihi my spicy little👹💕once again, i truly have no words for how thoughtful and sweet all of this is. im so grateful to have you with me on this journey (since part one, day ONE) and im so glad its been able to keep your interest after all these months.<3
"got the 1st grade knowledge beat out of me" literally had me CACKLING please!!😭✋ your excitement and the photos you send (which are hilarious too btw) always have me grinning from ear to ear. i swear my favorite part of reading feedback from you is that i will NEVER be able to predict whats coming next.😂 seriously though, im so glad youve been able to immerse yourself in the story like this (if we're being honest i definitely lose touch with reality a little bit when i get lost in writing it lol) but im so touched that it could evoke such a response in you too. (ps "i reread this tasty ass story atleast once every week. It's tradition at this point" might just be one of my favorite compliments ive EVER received about my writing. this is literally one of the nicest things you can tell someone who writes imo🥹).
MY HEART! RIPPED OUT MY CHEST! I CANT BREATH! IM SOBBING!IM DEVASTATED
(okay but why is this literally me reading any of your asks) this was also one of the most fun parts of the chapter to write omg. i love writing the end of a chapter so much that sometimes its the first thing i do.🤭
the detailed journey through each little part of the story that you go through in your asks always leaves me on cloud nine.!!! i love this so so much, i swear it does not get any better than when someone quotes the story back to me.<33 so thank you from the bottom of my heart for taking the time to share your thoughts on these specific moments. i loved reading every. single. one.💕
Had to pause, take a breather, and look out my window to reflect on who I am as a person I was hyperventilating baby I couldn't breath for shit reading this 👀 I had to stop reading and get some water, my throat dried out.
(also btw if it makes you feel any better i had a similar reaction to ALL of these after i typed them out. felix really does things to me, i probably need an intervention or some shit but here we are.🥹)
knowing that this story adds a touch of goodness to your world means more to me than i can ever express. :( im sorry to hear that you’ve got some challenges to face, but like you said i know we all do from time to time, so im just forever grateful that my writing can provide a little distraction for you in the midst of the everyday chaos.<3 (ps. if things ever get too rough, you know where to find me!!❤️)
okay okay i’m cutting myself off here, but i really do appreciate the little reminders to take my time and prioritize self-care too.<3 the way you express yourself is so unique, please never change. i love that you’re as insane and unhinged about this story as i am.🥹 as always thank you so much for the continued support, it is more appreciated than you could ever know.🤗💕
3 notes · View notes
swampwart · 11 months
Text
its only been two hours!
if i dont bog myself down with work, i think of you
i cannot escape you, oh i really really dont want to
i wish that dream was real i wish it was fucking real
i cant forgot how you kissed me
i wish you kissed me
i love your lips, i miss when you'd stare at mine wheneber we spoke
i want you back and im so deeply ashamed about this
this is not what i thought it would be
breaking up was suppose to get rid of all these feelings
but now.i feel all of them, just without having you
i cannot have you in my heart like this
i cannot keep ranting to you in brain about jow horrible my emotional life is and how badly i just want to reach over, hold me, rub my spine again and tell me its all going to be okay with such raw confidence it was like god told you or something
ive never dreamed about anyone before, not even him
but you have entered my escape so vividly and in such detail i cannot ignore it
it tricks me into thinking its real life
like you were actually upset i ever made a joke about taking another man's name and you wrapped your arms around me when i told you w out prompt i was only jokinh
in my dream that didnt reassure you either
you asked me "are you crushing on anyone else right now?" and i giggled and said "noo" w a knowing eye and you got nervous and looked to the side and forced out a laugh "noo thats not okay, we need to find you someone" then you took me by the wrist and had me speak to a guy
all i could do was watch you while you laughed at everything he said, and i think i was just happy i was with you
(he didnt even have a face, yet i could see the peak of your cheekbone that causes the depression beneath your eye)
later on i went home w a beautiful girl, tough and thick in every aspect, in a sick way i cannot deny het beauty
she was into me, i think we wanted this to go somewhere,, her friend had set us up and were hung out alone in rug covered room with a mirror and magical beads,, and she spoke with a tough sarcasm that ive gotten used to over the years, i dont think i looked at her long
then you came in, light in your weight and smiling lile ive never seen. Im use to this i think, but something hurt inside so far down and so unimportantly, i just focused on that you were happy. And you began to recount to me the tome you had, laughing the whole time, and i asked you "are you drunk" and in your beautiful, biteless irony you said "nooo maybe judt a little champagne" and we laugjed anf i was so happy to be wuth you, giggling in out own language rven thoigh i hear you speak this way with everyone. In dream and now, shamefully for my own comfort, i will believe it is special when you do it with me
and you held my hand and played with my fingers while you pattered on, and swinging your head this way and that, and in a moments confusion we forgot who we were and you kissed me.
That moment convinced me this dream was real. Your lips left a session on mine that felt so real. I know i felt pressure, i know i did. At that moment,i was convinced it was because we really did kiss. Now i know itd because our last kiss, whenbeer that was, has not left my lips this whole time. That kiss we had, whenvef that was, has traveled through time and told me we are still in embrace.
i was left in a daze after that, and i heard you gasp and laugh and say "oh i forgot!" and take hold of my second hand. But i stared off, with a dopey smile growing all over my face. Thid whole dream I've felt so tired, my eyebags leading the way. But that kiss sparked rhe rest of my physical existence, and golden light rippled along my skin, into my brain, and swayed its way across my eyes. I heard angels singing, the muses, everything that comes witj a golden kiss. I was so happy. And i agreed with you and said "dont worry about it,"
latter on, the girl saw us and was less than impressed. You were layed across your back (your hair was parted in the most stunning way) and playing with my fingers. My exhaustion was back, but it did not matter to me when i was with you. And she asked what my boyfriend was doing here, and i told her "its complicated" while focused entirely on you playing with my hands.
And she told me she doesnt do cheaters, and i told her dont worry about it. I said before you walked into the room i had a boyfriend, so she assumed it was you. I told her "this isnt him," and it confused her more. She sat down and began to do her make up and in a distance, maybe even hurt, but still open manner. And i turned my attention away for a while, sadly my back to you, and i asked her if she knew what polyamory is. And she adjusted in her seat, squinting her eyes as she tried to think, then we spoke at the same time, it isn't / is it, "what the mormans do." I told her that was paligamy and involed religion and stuff we didn't jave here. She nodded along, confused, partly wanting to understand and partly wanting to leave, and i was fine with that.
Then i think someone walked in for you. I think it was him. And then you were gone. You where gone snd i think my dreamself felt there was no point to remember the dream anymore. Now ive woken up, sad, confused, happy, and feeling so stupid.
i cant decide if i want all of this to be real or not. I do, hell i want you so bad, its such a deep seeded need in me, i dont know what to do. But what the hell am i doing. what the hell am i doing. I have a boyfriend, but shit i think its getting rocky. Im makinh mistakes, he is too. And im so scared. And i just want comfort. Like a child i just want to be held and told itsnall going to be okay. And everytime i think about it, im always telling you. Im always telling you.
i miss you so much, i miss you more than anything
5 notes · View notes