#im sorry this is like the last time ill be drawing him
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i think hes neat just a little bit
#kagamine len#len kagamine#vocaloid#vocaloid fanart#im sorry this is like the last time ill be drawing him#no it wont#it will happen again#no it will not#actually yes it will
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Babysitting Shenanigans Part 2: Piston gets rowdy at Hot Rod's house!
Bonus:
#i drew bumblebees face and i didnt like it so i said Ill just do something easier! then proceeded to render his back.............#maccadam#tfe bumblebee#breakbee fanchild#hot rod transformers#jazz transformers#transformers oc#transformers sparkling#sorry to the Rodimus fans out there i love you but i cant draw him yet his lines are crazy#me everytime i draw a new transformer: damn girl your body IS CRAZY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#okay but i love drawing Jazz he's so :D#im getting faster at this and better at drawing transformers wow#although fun fact about me: all my screens have the blue light filter and hot rod was this ugly pink color the first time i colored him#great news! i learned how to use filters and wont have to render shadows individually anymore!!!!#i wanted to do that meme where the baby is duct taped to the wall but Piston is too big so i found the one where the guy is on the ceiling#hot rod is watching Fast and Furious idk which one i just googled fast and furious screengrab#i really like this doing these are so much fun :)#tf one jazz#cyberverse hot rod#tf piston#transformers#earthspark AU#The Last Mile Marker#i had to edit this i noticed a mistake so sorry
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lateposting . happy 1500 days anniversary to the election special ❤️
#and by late posting i mean that it was yesterday 💔#i finished this at like 11 pm okkay i didnt have the time all day 💔#also posted this one to twt but it had mistakes so i touched it up today and yeahh#the lightning is a lil funky but idc im still proud wtvr#ive had this idea since uhhh march but i didnt know how to execute it yet and today i said fuck it cuz now its my chance so yayyy#this is kinda gay art idk cuz to me its the 1500th day anniversary of their last peak interaction idk#i rlly miss them 💔💔💔#tawog tobias#tobias wilson#gave him a big coat cuz idk a ref to the one and who knows maybe he stole it from harold yayy#i shouldve made the sleeves bigger in that case but idk maybe he tugged them but its not clear here#tawog bobert#bobert 6b#was abt to draw him with a skirt but i bailed on that at the end fml#feel like an angel lost its wings SORRY GUYS 💔💔#if i draw them like this again maybe ill do that who knows#xuz i do wanna draw them again its fun#ran out of things to say okkay thats all rest of the tags GO#fanart#cherrys evil art#tawog#the amazing world of gumball#was gonna add the gumball chronicles but i dont think thats a real tag damn no one gaf 💔💔 i dont either but yk#rainbowdroid#I GUESS yeahh the intention was gay#eyestrain
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if life is categorized by Before Loss and After Loss then I exist in the before but with a countdown to the after. and the countdown is always always present and debilitating. the loss will be debilitating too but i cant help myself. i will always suffer twice.
#i cant let go of it. i cant even enjoy good moments without thinking about how they'll just be memories one day#how they're already memories since moments pass so fast#everything is I'll Miss This and i already miss it and i cant believe once you're gone you're gone forever#and ill never ever see you again. and your shell is in the ground but where did the rest of you go?#should i look at your body one last time? on one hand itll be the last time i see you.#on the other hand it will be the last time i see you.#and the memory of you will die with me too. as if neither ever existed#it impacts me so much too bc i dont feel close to anybody really...and i dont make friends easily#so whats going to happen when the people who have always been there arent there anymore?#im going to be alone for so much of my life.#i will record your voice so im ready for when i cant hear it from the source while also knowing it wont be enough and one day#ill be wishing it lasted longer. it could be 12 hours long and ill want more.#how do you surpass this? it hasn't even happened. when it happens i don't know what ill do. considering my whole life has been#the timer. the countdown. hours and hours of anticipatory grief#and then ill be next. me. some of all thats left of you. it cant be true.#sorry. this gets worse every single year and its been going insane lately#id surprisingly been managing it well for months somehow ! it wouldnt cross my mind...and now its there again#like it accumulated and its all coming out right now. ive been crying for hrs tonight and last night#one day his things will just be things. things ive made and given him will be in my hands again.#talkys#i want to go hug my dad but then ill just cry over how one day i wont be able to....! how do i store it? how do i save it?#how do i preserve it forever....even as i take my own last breath....#i cant believe im the only one of me. and my dad is the only one of him.#i wouldnt want to be reborn as anyone else. i cant believe one day i wont get to draw or eat or be comfy in bed anymore.#i cant take it !! im so scared. ill be scared until the end. and you wont be there to hold my hand. im going to be alone.#and none of those years of grief and joy and memories will matter.#i wonder if it would help to tell him about this. i need something to hold onto for when it happens. anything. but i also know it'll make i#hurt more; obviously. just another piece of him that'll be gone one day
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decided to rewatch oli's christmas song stream from last year and remind me again why the fuck oli/sausage is a rarepair again. he sings no less than five romantic songs about sausage (admittedly two of those are just different versions of santa, baby). one of them is him and sausage singing baby it's cold outside together. oli literally left heaven to find this man. what. what am i seeing that everyone else isn't hello.
#space rambles#sorry every once and a while i have to get ill about them again#remind me of this post when it's actually closer to christmas#and maybe ill write/draw something inspired by them singing it's cold outside actually#more likely draw but idk we'll see what i'm feeling#i do genuinely love this stream even though by GOD sausage cannot hold a tune#oli's great as always though#also in the two different versions of santa baby oli says “ive been an awful good boy” and “ive been an awful good girl” so like. gender wi#slight revision he technically sings FOUR songs about sausage#because he sings last christmas at two points and the first time around he goes:#“this year to save me from tears ill give it to someone special (sausage)”#the second time around it's eddie because. of course it is.#and also tbh i think the second time around he is??? maybe singing last christmas about sausage?????#they broke up in the like 30 minutes in between the two versions#ANOTHER EDIT. IT WAS FIVE SONGS (can you tell im just listening to the music again)#the “underneath the misletoe” bit in “all i want for christmas is you” is also followed by him going “sausage”#he's normal
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i think itd be so funny silly if aoki bailed daigo out of jail one (1) time just to flex the fact he could yk
#masadai#snap chats#OBVIOUSLY not doing it to be nice... just a reminder that he's head honcho or whatever... that evil kinda shit.. hehe..#just got done playin y7 with my friend for the day and i want to scream but anyway Main Post Time#i aint sayin he should bail daigo out for the firearm charge. i mean itd be funny if he did#but no i just mean like a miscellaneous Disturbing The Peace kind of crime#i think thats how daigo should find out masato became aoki. in my delulu timeline. cause lol.#so funny Back To My First Ramble my friend wanna believe masato is not dead so bad#she thought the rando hooded geomijul member was him like GIRL HES DEAD MOVE ON#my other friend was like this too... so much copium.. im sorry girls but hes dead.... technically speaking..#back on track jfc ANYWAY NO ITD BE FUNNY#i was gonna draw a comic bout it or write a fic bout it but alas. no juice </3#also im busy this week and plus i dont really have an idea on how to execute the whole idea so#ill just do what i did last time and hoard it for a year til i think of somethin LMAO
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5 acts
words: 2k
warnings: soft!rafe, very fluffy, insecurity from rafe, reader is described as having curly hair, established relationship, brief nudity but very sfw (reader is topless while getting a massage but no descriptions)
5 acts of service to spark romance between you and your partner
make their morning easier: make them breakfast, or their coffee just as they like it
take care of their vehicle: get it washed, filled, and oil changed if needed. it'll feel like a weight off their shoulders
organize something meaningful for them: go through an old photo album or set up a space in the home that caters to them
pamper them after a long day: draw a bath, brush their hair, give them a massage
set up their favorite movie night: get their favorite snacks, light some candles, and turn a simple movie night into a romantic evening
rafe frowns as he reads over the list again.
“baby!” your voice rings out, and he's quick to jump to his feet and rush down the stairs.
“oh!” you stop as he lands on the hardwood in front of you. “you came down so quickly.” you giggle. “i was just going to tell you dinner will be ready in about ten minutes.”
“ill get the table set up.” rafe leans in and presses a kiss to your cheek, leaving you to look at him in confusion as he walks away, a certain amount of pep in his step you're not used to seeing.
you get even more suspicious when you bring the dish into the dining room and see that rafe has a candle lit.
“is there a special occasion i forgot about?” you question as rafe pulls your chair out for you.
“nope, just treating my girl.” rafe swallows thickly, surprised and disappointed in himself that you're already noticing his change in behavior.
it all started last weekend when rafe overheard you talking to your girlfriends about love languages. he didn't mean to eavesdrop, truly, but he found himself quickly locked in when you said yours was acts of service and quality time, but that you couldn't think of any acts of service rafe has done recently.
you didn't sound that upset about it, and even immediately clarified that rafe makes up for it in other ways and you weren't even sure what he could do for you, but rafe was determined to change the tides of your relationship.
act 1
rafe shuts his alarm off quickly before looking over at you, making sure the beeping didn't wake you up as well.
he lets out a sigh of relief when he sees your eyes are still closed before carefully sliding out of bed and tiptoeing out of the room.
rafe makes it to the kitchen keeping his steps quiet as he looks around at the various cabinets. he's not sure where to start, so he begins with unloading the dishwasher and putting everything away, when he opens up a cabinet to see the waffle maker and an idea sparks.
rafe opens up the pantry, stepping in to find the mix as well as anything else he might need for the breakfast, and just like that, rafes plan sets into motion.
he makes a stack of waffles, but not before turning on the coffee machine so you can wake up to a fresh brew. he makes a good portion of eggs for you to split before checking the clock, figuring it's about time to check to see if you're awake.
rafe pours your coffee in your favorite tumbler before adding ice and syrup, smiling at himself for remembering just how you like it.
rafe is about to head out of the kitchen when he hears your footsteps coming down the stairs.
“good morning ba-”
“oh my god, im so late for my nail appointment, why didn't you wake me up?” you squeal, grabbing your purse and adjusting the outfit you threw on quickly.
“i didn-”
“i got to leave, like right now, sorry babe.” you run up to rafe and press a quick kiss to his lips, about to rush away when you realize the two plates of breakfast.
“it's okay.” rafe shakes his head. “i'll make you breakfast a different day. forgot you had a nail appointment. but here-” rafe grabs the tumbler and thrusts it into your hand. “at least take the coffee i made you.”
rafe can see the conflicting emotions going on inside your head.
“hey.” he says softly. “it's okay. go. you and i both know how ridiculous those late fees are.”
“okay.” you nod, pouting and looking back at the plates as you leave.
act 2
“do you have any plans today?” rafe asks, brushing your hair away from your face.
“nope. just hanging with you.” you smile up at him, snuggling closer to his side, not yet ready to leave the bed when rafe is keeping you so warm, occasionally pressing kisses to your face.
“im gonna go take your car to get it serviced.” rafe says. “since you don't have anything going on.”
“oh.” you hum. “okay.” you were secretly hoping you could just have a lazy day in bed with rafe, maybe even force him to watch some trashy reality tv, knowing it'll only take a couple minutes for him to get fully invested in whatever drama starts up between the couples.
“you stay in bed though.” rafe smiles at you, sliding out from under the covers, leaving you to pull the blanket tighter around yourself and inhale his fleeting scent.
rafe heads down the stairs, a pep in his step at getting this task done for you. he grabs your keys before heading out the door, taking it to the service center first for an oil change. it's not very dirty on the inside, but rafe decides he'll still vacuum the inside after taking it through the wash.
you really only use your car when rafe is gone or you have an appointment, so it doesn't get used often.
rafe finishes everything he wants to get done for you, filling up your tank before driving back home.
rafe is whistling and happy as he returns home and heads back up the stairs, and just like he expects, you're still in bed, but sat up, watching the television.
“hey baby.” your smile widens as you see him. “i missed you so much.”
“sorry, doll.” rafe changes quickly before climbing into the bed. “but i got everything done on your car.”
“thanks.” you hum. “really appreciate it.” you press your face into his chest, throwing one leg over his hips as you return to a lying position, no longer caring about what's on the tv now that you've got your boyfriend back.
“you don't have anything else you wanna get done today, do you?” you ask. “i thought we'd have all day together.”
rafe sighs as he looks at the clock, realizing just how long it took him to service your vehicle. “well, we have the rest of the day at least.”
act 3
“um, rafe?” you call out as you open up a drawer in your closet, expecting to see the tangled mess of necklaces and earrings just as you left it.
“honey?” rafe walks into your bedroom before realizing you’re in the closet.
“where’d all my jewelry go?” you ask confused.
“oh, i organized it for you.” rafe moves to the drawers, sliding open the two underneath to reveal jewelry displays and every piece neatly put away. “i also got you a display for your favorite necklaces but i wanted you to choose what ones go up there.”
“where at?” you ask, noticing the necklace rafe got you for your first anniversary in missing from the drawer.
rafe doesn’t respond with his words, taking your hand and guiding you out of the closet and into the main bedroom, where you notice the necklace stand shaped like a tree with two chains already hanging from them.
“oh my gosh, whats this?” you squeal, pulling the new necklace off the stand, admiring the diamonds that glitter back at you in the shape of an r.
“for you, baby.” rafe kisses your cheek.
“what has gotten into you?” you ask, but before rafe can worry too much about you figuring out he’s following a guide on how to treat you better, you turn and pull your hair off your neck for him to slot the necklace on.
act 4
“oh right there!” you moan out as rafe rubs at your back, hands smoothing up and down against your skin, gently kneading into your muscles as he does.
“love pampering you baby.” rafe leans down to press a kiss against your shoulder blade.
“you’re so sweet.” you smile and turn your head. “i’m gonna have to make it up to you.”
“you already treat me better than i deserve.”
you frown and turn over onto your stomach, bringing the blanket with you to keep your chest covered. “not true. you’re an amazing boyfriend.”
“thanks, doll.” rafe doesn’t want you to worry about his insecurities in this moment, pressing a soft kiss to the tip of your nose. “stay there.”
you get comfortable on your back, eyes sliding shut as rafe starts some gentle music. it flows from the speakers as rafe hums along to the instrumental version of a popular song, grabbing your hairbrush from off the dresser.
you are only vaguely aware of rafes movements, when suddenly a hand is placed on the top of your head, massaging against your scalp that has you moaning out again.
you hear rafe chuckle at your reaction, the sides of your lips also quirking up, when you suddenly feel a hairbrush running through your strands.
you scrunch your face up and give it a moment, hoping rafe would stop when he suddenly brushes through a tangle, making you cry out.
“shit.” rafe drops the brush with a clatter onto the hardwood. “im sorry.”
you can hear the defeat in rafes voice and you turn over onto your stomach to face him, frowning. “baby? whats wrong?”
“i just can’t do anything right. i try to make you breakfast, you have to leave. i take your car to be serviced, and i miss out and spending time with you. i can’t even brush your hair all romantically like the guide said.”
“guide?” you question, grabbing your shirt and putting it back on as you pull rafe up to sit on the bed next to you.
“i… i read something online. about acts of service you can do for your partner. i just want to be a good boyfriend.”
you don’t mean to, but a laugh falls from your lips. “rafe, that’s ridiculous. you’re already the best boyfriend without even trying. did i say or do something to make you feel like you needed to try harder?”
“no-” rafe sighs, knowing he has to admit it. “i just heard you talking with your friend about love languages. i’m trying to make it up to you.”
“and the guide told you to brush my hair?” you scoff. “im guessing whoever wrote that did not have curls.”
“you're probably right.” rafe lets a smile come to his face.
“i love you for you, not because of the things you do for me. besides, you do enough without even trying or following some guide. you take out the trash, you stock up on my favorite treats, you get me anything i want whenever i feel the slightest bit ill.”
“so… you don’t want me to do the last thing on the guide?”
“depends what it is.” you shrug. “if it involves you leaving and doing something for me, then absolutely not. or at least you can take me with you.”
“i set up a romantic movie night in the living room.”
“that sounds much better for both of us than you brushing my hair.” you giggle.
act 5
you tuck yourself further into rafes side, smiling as your favorite scene finishes, turning your attention to rafe.
“thank you for doing all this for me.” you whisper, keeping your voice soft. “i love you so much.”
“i love you.” rafe says earnestly, ducking his head to press a kiss against the top of your head, but you’re quick to reposition so your lips can meet.
“now we have to figure out your love language so i can do things for you.” you tell rafe.
“my love language is you.” rafe says, squeezing you tightly. “my everything is you.”
sfw tags: @winterrrnight @cameronswiftie @ladyinbl00d @ethanthequeefqueen @drewsephrry @wearemadeofstardust0
#rafe fluff#rafe cameron fluff#obx fluff#outer banks fluff#rafe fic#rafe fanfic#rafe fanfiction#rafe cameron fic#rafe cameron fanfic#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe x you#rafe x y/n#rafe x oc#rafe x reader#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron x y/n#rafe cameron x oc#rafe cameron x reader#rafe imagine#rafe blurb#rafe drabble#rafe one shot#rafe cameron imagine#rafe cameron blurb#rafe cameron one shot#rafe cameron drabble
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thinking about an isekaied reader and a yandere noble boy...
(gn reader x male noble yandere)
part 1 / part 2 / part 3 / part 4 / part 5
tw: yandere and manipulative behavior
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about a week has passed since you collapsed. after reading the letters, your parents insisted that you should reply with a short note stating that you had recovered. eventually you caved, concerned about the contents of the letters this... guy sent you, but not enough that you felt particularly threatened.
less than a week later, an oliver northwood appeared unannounced near the gated entrance of your family's estate.
everyone was caught off guard, but he was let in regardless. your parents were the count and countess of the land you resided in, but he was the son of a marquis. this placed him at a higher rank then your family. plus, the both of you had been friends since childhood, so your parents caved even with the sudden intrusion.
after he entered, you find yourself sitting in awkward silence having an impromptu tea party with him in the estate's garden.
"so uh, it feels like its been so long since we've seen each other" he said.
"yes... it has" you replied
"are you feeling better?"
"yes i am..."
following this short interaction was about three minutes of silence. he had seemed so... energetic in his letters, but in person he appears much more reserved.
"um... you seem different"
you felt your chest start pounding. your thoughts start rushing while you try to keep your face neutral. it hasnt even been 10 minutes and hes already figured out who you actually were? is he going to expose me? no, that would make him look crazy...
as you started spiraling he spoke up again, "it almost feels like you are a different person" he pauses before continuing, "your parents said that you were having some trouble with your memory... do you... not... remember me?"
this snapped you out of your thoughts, he had figured out that you were, in fact, a different person, while giving you a potential way out.
"oh im so sorry... my memory has been spotty, i didnt want to be rude. honestly i couldnt even remember who i was when i woke up, hehe~" you mentally screamed at yourself because he did NOT NEED TO KNOW THAT!!!
your thoughts were interrupted by his response, "oh im... sorry, that sounds awful." you saw fragments of a sly smile and a darkness in his eyes for a split second. the shift in expression disappeared so quickly you thought that you had imagined it.
he continues, "do you want me to try to fill in the gaps?"
"please do..." you reply.
"hmm.. ill start from the beginning." his eyes shift to make direct eye contact you. while he appears with soft eyes and a small smile, something about his expression feels a little unsettling. "well for starters, we have been friends since we were little. my parents are the marquis and marquess of the land just west of here. they had known each other for a while and had children around the same time, so they introduced us!"
his smiled widened as he continued speaking, "although we were only friends as children, as we got older we ended up becoming lovers!!"
the look of shock on your face didn't seem to surprise him. you begun trying to string words together into a coherent sentence when he follows up his previous statement.
"although... no one knows right now, we were keeping it secret to... avoid drawing unnecessary attention." the last part was spoken quickly and softly, making him sound unsure.
he takes your hand, "please love, i know you may not remember, but i have no problem waiting for you to fall in love with me."
"or... fall in love with me again i mean, hehe~"
should there be a part three?
feel free to drop in my inbox to ask any questions about him!!
#he is LYING TO YOUR FACE#he is trying his best to convince you that yall were more than friends#hes still a pathetic sopping wet cat of a man though#ariadne's writing - 🩷#ariadne's ocs - oliver northwood#yandere#yandere x reader#yandere oc x reader#yandere oc#yandere x darling#yandere scenarios#soft yandere#yandere imagines#male yandere
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vat7k designs in my head...
i thought their canon designs were a eensy weensy bit Unpolished so i made these mostly for myself. erm if u rly want it i think varian is 19 here, hugo 19, nuru 18, yong 12.
i also made rhem all playlists and had to draw them a cover so thats what the last img is I linked each of em under my notes for all of em... Under the cut is Like a Huge Infodump of notes i have for each chara,,,,,,
i kept varians design basically the same, i dislike the design w the orange neck thing so i just Nuked it😭... Here's Varians playlist
Hugos design i just wanted to put him in something more Loose. hes a thief, a professional escape artist. i dont think wearing clunky metal is ideal for him. i also gave him a prosthetic arm (blond w no arm design trope!) but u cant see it in the ref so i added another drawing of him in his under layering👍 i vaguely referenced russian(?) clothes for him as well... Yeah not too much changed w him i just tried to make him slippery-er. Here's Hugo's playlist
yong came relatively easy to me, if it wasn't obvious i did rip gaming from g*nshin's hoodie. i thought the lion hood was Adorable and freaking perfect for what i had in mind for hos character. since the og notes said the fire kingdom is loosely Chinese inspired i basically just kept that. i mashed tgt a buncha diff dynasties though sorry for how inconsistent i was... i think he looks Okay. anyways i changed yongs role a bit, ill explain why im adjusting some of their roles later but i kept yong as the Jinx Type character. hes the eldest in his family and has a buncha younger siblings, hes a lion dancer and does performances w his family/siblings. he rly like special effects n keeps tryna incorporate his fireworks into their performances (it flops and he has to sew up the dmg) ill explain more of yongs role in another post maybe shrugs... Here's Yong's Playlist
miss nuru was a bit of a struggle for me i might share my full design process with her coz i did a Bunch of mockups for her😭😭😭... i didnt have a specific country of reference for her but i chose to make her vaguely south asian inspired. i also really wanted to keep the sheer fabric w the star / constellation map. i love that idea its so cute so shes still technically the navigator. but she also wields a sword too, fencing or whatever. (her and varian r Huge Cass fangirls which is probably why she started tryna use a sword (snuck out to watch cass compete) Okay ill talk abt this later) in my head, okay ill Probably make a whole nother post talking abt how im interpreting/writing each chara, but in my head i think nuru is the youngest and her kingdom's archivist. shes mostly in charge of like Her kingdoms history / artifacts / etc. ok im getting too side tracked ill save the lore dump for later but thats Nurus role in the party. Here's Nuru's Playlist
uhm below i made their character stats mostly to help me with planning / role developing. the yellow is their base stats the color behind is their end stats i guess. i was gonna explain my reasoning for their stats but ermm this post is kinda Really long so sorry😭... varian max int for obvious reasons, also max charisma just coz i feel like u kinda learn a thing or two being around a couple manipulators and spending time in jail idk shrugs... (also lets not forget the "ud b surprised what ppl would do for a cookie!") Hugo slippery guy, if a brick is thrown at him as hes running hes gonna try n run faster to shatter it, his mindset is Run Run Run! i think hes relatively agile too but yeah mostly a Speedster. i think he n varian got no Physical strength varian maybe just like A little coz Farm boy but I rly doubt quirin is making him do a Lotta heavy lifting. yong has incredible stamina and agility because hed a performer. nuru is the strongest coz this team would literally Flop without a proper Offense😭... i think varian n hugo r able to outwit plenty of their opponents but i think nuru is pretty good in a fight, same w yong. Yeah Okay Sorry for a Long Long Post thanks hope u guys enjoy
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/ba6363d7b1e2d9565ad0772c759d82f3/2f75309ad678bccb-60/s540x810/ed019feb7ecce7fd92f771e3570b1614043c335c.jpg)
#vat7k#varian and the seven kingdoms#varian vat7k#hugo vat7k#nuru vat7k#yong vat7k#varian tangled#fanart#lizzysart
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love affair. [tsukishima kei x f!reader] chapter one.
>>The unsavory reputation that Tsukishima Kei has built for himself as the Sendai Frogs' rudest rookie puts his upcoming contract renewal at risk
or
Tsukki really needs a girlfriend, and you really need everyone to stop calling you his pathetic, pining best friend<<
series status: [complete]
masterlist. || next.
a/n: i have a lot of feelings about these two. welcome to those feelings.
[feel free to buy me a cup of coffee!]
---------------------------------------
Sendai Frogs Middle Blocker Tsukishima Kei Caught in Heated Argument with Fan
Sendai’s Tsukishima Kei Breaks Paparazzi Camera
Sendai Frogs Player Threatens Reporter Outside Home
You sigh, scrolling down the list of news articles that had populated when you’d entered his name into the search bar.
“This fucking guy.”
The top links are all reports of his most recent altercation, his newest scandal, the next thing he’s done wrong. Only a few talk about his performance during a game – luckily, he’s beyond talented and had drawn in a substantial amount of the Frogs’ fanbase, so his… poorer points have been overlooked by their management.
Until now.
You sigh again, remembering the text you’d woken up to this morning.
[5:07 AM]
Tsukki: im fucked
Tsukki: management called me in for a morning meeting
Tsukki: come over tn?
You’d groaned, instantly exasperated. You texted back that you would expect him to have dinner ordered by the time you arrived and left it at that, going about your day with a feeling that this had been the last straw for him.
Because Tsukishima Kei had always been trouble.
The boy you’d known in elementary school had been sweet and playful, but he’d had a mischievous streak. It had paired well with your general tendency toward chaos, and your friendship had been built on shared scoldings from teachers and parents.
The boy from middle school – the one who’d learned about betrayal – had been snarky and bitter, tongue sharp and words crafted to draw blood. Stones pelted at those who’d ever spoken ill of you – you, growing into wider-set hips and chubbier thighs than the other girls. You, who’d always hid your insecurities behind Tsukki, your wild smile and silly demeanor keeping others from seeing how painful stones could truly be.
He’d been almost imperceptibly softer with you – just a bit gentler, lacking the same heat that had scared others off – but he’d still cut you a handful of times. Retorts thrown too quickly in times of high stress, sarcastic comments snapped at your heels a little too thoughtlessly. But you’d always been tough — turned by the cruelty of a few mean boys and girls into something just sharp enough to handle his temper — and he’d learned that he should take care not to cross any real lines with you.
He’d still managed to cross a few in high school, and you’d taught him that you hadn’t been joking. He’d had to learn that the words ‘ I’m sorry ’ were hard to say, but that having you ignore him was harder.
And one day, those words had stopped working, too. Because a friend shouldn’t lash out enough to need them as often as he always had.
Tsukishima Kei had learned – in the middle of your third year at Karasuno, when a fight had gotten to a point worse than things had ever been between you – what it might mean to lose you. You’d walked away from him that day, and you’d gone weeks without speaking to him. He’d finally shown up at your door after a home game, drenched in the torrential downpour that had started so suddenly that you’re still convinced the universe had put you in a dramatic movie moment on purpose.
But he’d stood there anyway, waiting you out until you’d be willing to talk. Because you’d never once missed a game of his, and because – even if he’d been trying everything to get your attention since your fight – it was starting to feel like this was the nail in the coffin of your friendship. And he simply couldn’t have that. You could yell at him – bicker and snap and fight – but your silence was unacceptable.
He’d stood there at your door, blond hair plastered to his forehead and rain-covered glasses hiding his eyes completely, as you’d beaten his walls down to nothing. Screaming, you’d gone on and on about his lack of consideration and care for you – about every moment that had felt like a punch to the gut when nothing of the sort should be allowed in a friendship – until you’d run out of breath. Until all you could do was stand there on your doorstep and sob, the storm drowning you out to everyone but him.
He hadn’t said a single word, only stepping up to you once you’d stopped and wiping your snot-covered face with the front of his drenched volleyball shirt.
“ Okay, ” He’d finally mumbled, voice thick with regret as you’d cried into his chest. “ I’m sorry. It won’t happen again. ”
You two hadn’t had a single problem since. Things had gone back to normal, with Tsukki toeing the line but, without fail, never crossing it.
You’d been secretly glad he hadn’t changed all that much. He was still the same. He was still Tsukki.
The rest of high school had passed by in a series of rolled eyes and exasperated comments. College had started just the same, with new friends made and roommates come and gone, but Tsukishima Kei right where he’s always been. People here were less rude, less judgmental of your size and the unapologetic demeanor that had been built because of it. You’d made friends here, although never ones that could compare to the Karasuno Volleyball boys, who still float in your social orbit even now. Shimizu Kiyoko floats closer still, one of your dearest friends to this day.
And, still , already three years into college, Tsukki’s what he’s always been.
Brutally honest and annoyingly coarse.
Sarcastic at best and a cloud of misery at worst.
Immovably loyal and at your side without question.
He’s the same as always, if not a bit more mature with age. Your relationship’s developed into one of constant exasperation, witnessing his every moment of idiocy into adulthood. He’s a nightmare to have a serious conversation with, but you’ve learned that he always listens, even when he wants to do anything but that. Your arguments are frequent, but never serious.
Any hint of a real fight is always squashed promptly under his feet, his hands calming on your shoulders and his tone losing its edge the moment he’d spot the telltale signs of your anger – he’d always give in first, even with a personality as stubborn as his. The balance between his commonplace sarcasm and something more serious is a delicate one, but he’d managed to find it with you.
The issue, however, is that you are the exception.
Tsukishima had been recruited by the Sendai Frogs in your third year, playing successfully and renewing the year-long contract for the following school year – the unspoken agreement being a full-time professional contract with them after graduation. He’d been sheltered, in a way, last year, because it had been a soft launch – a trial run to see how he’d do, how the Frogs fans would take to him.
As it turns out, the road to going pro comes with as many problems as it does benefits.
Upon signing the contract for this year, the Frogs management had officially introduced their It Boy to the world.
Tsukishima Kei – 21 years old, Middle Blocker.
He’d been thrown into an unending schedule at the beginning of the year – any time outside of practice and games is taken by interviews, sponsorships, media promotion. His face and name had been plastered over billboards and brand collabs, the Sendai Frogs’ Middle Blocker a player slated to bring the volleyball world to its knees.
But the most important, truly – the thing that had started all his problems – is the invasion of privacy.
He’d managed to make it to the start of summer vacation while juggling the newfound fame, but – with the halfway point of his temporary contract approaching quickly – the Frogs fans had recently become rabid. People clambering over each other in classes to get a better look at him, baristas writing their number on his coffee cups at cafes (and then posting his coffee order online, of course), and his face posted all over the internet. Every miniscule move he makes is posted to Twitter – his class schedules, his mealtimes, his practice hours. Paparazzi at his apartment, at his car, at his classes.
He’s everywhere, and that’s too much, even for him.
He and Yamaguchi had had to move to a gated, private townhouse together, unable to stay in their dingy off-campus apartment anymore – too many people had tried the locks and camped out in front for a single glimpse of the up and coming star athlete.
You hadn’t escaped the public eye unscathed, either. You’d seen enough comments about yourself online – what your relationship with Tsukishima Kei might be, and why it always seemed just non-platonic enough to be questionable but completely unable to be pinned down. What you may or may not be gaining from hanging around this rising heartthrob, and – notably – how you could possibly think he’d be interested in you, given your… physical attributes.
You’d learned to be good at ignoring those comments, but it hadn’t come without damage. Damage that had taken the form of quiet arguments with Tsukki about not wanting to go out into the world with him, irritated demands that you not let the irrelevant comments of a few internet trolls affect your friendship. More than a few instances of Tadashi and Kiyoko showing up to your door with takeout and some reassurances, Tsukki’s barrage of whiny texts set aside for a night.
It had gotten easier over the summer, your ability to ignore the public’s opinion not necessarily stronger, but your ability to hide the effects of it certainly solidified. You manage to shake off the minor stress that comes with leaving your little studio apartment every morning, and you’re happy with the balance of your private and public life by Tsukishima Kei’s side.
What you’re not happy with – very crucially – is his inability to keep his name out of the tabloids for picking fights with paparazzi.
–
By the time you make it to his townhouse, it’s well past 5pm and you’re nearly dead on your feet from the full day of work and classes. School’s just picked up again, and your professors seem to not know the meaning of ‘syllabus week’.
Tadashi answers the door, glancing over your shoulder at the poorly hidden paparazzi across the street before gesturing you into the house.
“He’s not here.”
You blink, taken aback. “What?” Where the hell-
“I am now.”
You turn, finding Tsukki just behind you in the doorway, a bag of takeout in hand and his gym bag slung over his shoulder. He shuts the door and kicks off his shoes, eyeing the narrow glare you’re giving him.
“Got something to say?”
Your tone is sharp. “Did you really break a reporter’s camera last night?”
He nods, not even a little bit ashamed. “He was sitting on my car after practice, waiting for me. And then he wouldn’t get off of it.”
You sigh while Yamaguchi nods understandingly.
“Yeah, alright, that’s annoying…”
“ Annoying isn’t enough to justify my reaction, apparently.” He shakes his head, following the two of you into the kitchen. He leaves the bag on the island for you to unpack and disappears down the hall toward his bedroom to change. You withdraw containers of curry and set about serving three plates of it, navigating their kitchen without issue.
Tadashi mumbles quietly beside you. “How fucked is he?”
You shake your head, sighing again. “Infinitely fucked, I’d say.”
“You saw the look in his eye?” He cuts a questioning glance at you, his concern apparent. You just nod, pouring out drinks for the group.
“He’s not telling us something.”
“ He’s right here.”
You both look up, finding Tsukki in the doorway with a pinched scowl and high, tensed shoulders. He lifts a brow at you.
“I’m fine. ”
You and Tadashi make brief eye contact before snorting in unison and pushing past him to the living room with the food. You take a corner of the couch, and Yamaguchi occupies the armchair beside you.
“So, what’d they say?” You ask.
“Off the team yet?” He follows up with a joking smile.
No one acknowledges the underlying nerves you’re both displaying when you look Tsukki over. As much as he needs to get his attitude in check, neither of you can fathom a world in which the Frogs had let him go.
Tsukki flops down on the other end of the couch and breathes out a quiet sigh, slumping back into the cushions. “Management is unhappy with the reputation I’ve created for myself.”
You nod, taking a bite. You’d expected that.
“Okay…?” You draw your knees up under yourself, watching him stare up at the ceiling.
“They have asked-” He lifts his brows, considering something. “-well, more like threatened – that I make a major change to my lifestyle in order to fix the growing impression of me before it becomes ‘solidified’,” He quotes with his fingers, smiling mirthlessly. “Or my full-time contract’s on the line. They want me to find something to make me seem more…” He trails off, staring off to the side now, in your general direction.
“Pleasant. Approachable. Relatable. Soft.” He shrugs. “That kind of thing.”
Months of watching Tsukki adjust to the celebrity lifestyle makes translating this a breeze.
“They want you to get a girlfriend,” Yamaguchi concludes, spooning curry into his mouth.
He laughs bitterly. “And they want it fast.”
You take another bite, shrugging when he looks over at you. “Better get to downloading dating apps, then.”
He rolls his eyes. “You’re enjoying this.” He tugs his phone out of his pocket, anyway, glancing briefly at his roommate. “You’re both enjoying this.”
“Well, you didn’t get kicked off the team, so-” Yamaguchi relaxes, kicking his feet up on the coffee table.
“Mm-hm-” You agree. “You did this to yourself.” And then you scoot in, watching him download a few apps. “Cast your phone to the TV so we can watch.”
“You’re funny- hey- ”
You snatch his phone away, connecting his phone to the TV and projecting his open Tinder screen. You slap his hands when he reaches for you, setting his profile up for him in a matter of minutes. He snorts.
“Experienced in online dating?”
“Gotta do something to pass the time in between classes.”
You only realize how it sounds when they both eye you in amused surprise. Tsukki sits up to look at you properly, scandalized and face split in a wide grin. “Gotta do what in between classes, exactly?”
“Wait-”
Tadashi giggles into his hands, sinking low in the armchair, and Tsukki shakes his head, tutting in disappointment at you.
“That’s a crazy thing to admit out loud, Y/n-”
“Shut up ,” You shove him, tossing his phone back and then pointing at the TV. “Start swiping.”
He relaxes back into the couch with a laugh, and the three of you eat your dinner with the entertainment of the night.
–
“Pass.”
“Aw, she’s cute.”
“Exactly. Girls who are cute usually can’t handle me.”
“...Was that a reference to his personality or to sex?” You ask, eyeing Tadashi fearfully.
He shakes his head beside you. “Better not to ask, I fear.”
Tsukki’s suspicious grin is enough for your lip to curl in disgust.
“Ew.”
“I’m just being honest,” He shrugs, unapologetic.
You lay a hand on his shoulder, speaking down to him like he’s a child. “Well, if you don’t start swiping right on cute girls, your contract’s going up in flames, sweetheart.”
“ Ugh -” Tsukki groans loudly, throwing his phone down on the couch. “This isn’t working. None of these girls are the right fit.”
“Then maybe your standards shouldn’t be literally impossible to meet!” Yamaguchi throws his hands up in exasperation. “We’ve been at this a whole hour, and you’ve only swiped right on one girl.”
“Yeah, but she had nice tits,” He admits plainly.
You and Yamaguchi stare, deadpan. “You’re terrible,” You say eventually.
“Yeah,” Tsukki sighs. “I know.” He takes a breath, and then he’s turning to you with wide eyes. “Oh, hey! You have nice tits, too – you be my girlfriend.”
Yamaguchi promptly chokes on his drink, and you reach to yank the pillow out from under Tsukki’s head.
“Stop-” You smack him in the face with it repeatedly. “-Being. Gross.”
“It was a compliment!” He laughs, blocking his head and then catching the pillow with ease. You enter into an unwilling match of tug-of-war. “And I already know our personalities work together, so I don’t have to go through the pain of a talking stage!”
You eye him with suspicion, pulling the pillow toward you. “You’re not actually considering this.” You look back at Yamaguchi. “He’s not actually considering this, right?”
Your friend just stares, shocked.
Tsukki pulls hard on the pillow, catching you off guard and launching you toward him. “Oh, I most certainly am.”
“Tsukishima Kei-” You tug, hard. He resists. “Get that thought out of your head right now.”
“Come on-” He argues. “We are clearly a match made in Heaven.”
“In Hell, you mean!” You laugh. “There’s no way!” You look at Yamaguchi in panic. “Help me!”
The man just shrugs uselessly. “This conversation wasn’t on my bingo card for the year. I’m stumped.”
Tsukki rolls his eyes. “Come on, Y/n. It’s not like you’ve got guys lined up outside your door-”
“How would you know?” You snap, a little offended. “I could be going on dates every night-”
“When would you have time for that? You’re with me most nights.” He leans in, a wicked gleam in his eye. “Even more evidence that we should just date.”
“Get away from me-” You push him back with your foot, putting distance between you. He just grabs your ankle and pulls you toward him, and you scream as you’re dragged down the length of the couch.
Tsukki starts to clamber over you, but that finally sets Yamaguchi in motion, the boy standing quickly and yanking Tsukki by his hair back to the other side of the couch.
“Play nice, you freak,” He says, smacking the blond hard on the forehead. Tsukki just laughs, one of those rare laughs that makes you forget why you were ever mad in the first place.
“Okay, okay!” He yells, struggling to be freed from Yamaguchi’s torture.
You crawl back to your corner, kicking him for good measure while you go. “You’re fucking crazy.”
“Come on, Y/n,” Tsukki argues, still smiling wide. “This is literally a win-win.” He fixes himself, keeping an eye on Yamaguchi while he talks, because the freckled boy is grabbing a magazine off the coffee table and rolling it up. “We’re good together.”
“This is only a win-win for you,” You fight, listing things off and ticking them on your fingers as you go. “You’re annoying, arrogant, have poor impulse control and a short temper, and– importantly – we don’t even like each other!” You throw your hands out as best you can, emphasizing it. “Why would we date when we’re not attracted to each other?”
He doesn’t answer, only flicking his gaze down the length of your body appreciatively before meeting your eyes again. He sees that you’ve seen it, your gaze wary, and he grins wickedly.
“Who’s ‘we’?”
That earns him a rolled magazine to the head.
“I’m just saying,” He laughs. “Just think of how much Management would like it if I found a girlfriend right away, and one that they know is good for me-”
“Alright-” You plant your feet on the floor with an irritated sigh, suddenly tired of this conversation. “-don’t bring them into this to guilt-trip me.” You stand, clearly making to leave.
Tsukki’s smile drops, and he stands quickly, his jokes forgotten. “What? Wait-” His eyes are wide, betraying genuine surprise. You frown, and his eyes track it. He gauges your annoyance, seeing that it’s starting to tip into something more.
“Okay,” He breathes, suddenly quite serious. He holds his hands out toward you carefully, grabbing your shoulders and pulling you back to the couch with him. Yamaguchi perches on the arm of the couch, observing quietly.
“That’s not what I meant,” Tsukki tries. “I actually kinda do think we’d be good together.” When you don’t seem to believe it, he tries again. “And I’m not trying to guilt-trip you. I do think Management genuinely knows that you’re good for me-”
You know that, too. You know that Management has always liked you. That’s why this idea scares you just a little bit.
Because it’s feasible.
“No one’s going to believe that we’re together if we clearly-” You swallow hard and gesture between you. “-don’t have that kind of kind of chemistry, Tsukki.”
He shrugs. “It’s not that hard to act. We have the friendship chemistry, so we’re not uncomfortable. We would just need to add-”
“Holding hands? Kissing? Entirely different body language? Clear physical attraction?” You argue, lifting your brows.
He nods like it’s the easiest thing in the world. “Yeah. That’s not that bad.”
You level him with a meaningful look. “Tsukishima.” You smile bitterly when he blinks at the use of his full name. “ Look at me.”
Tadashi makes a noise of protest over Tsukki’s shoulder, clearly disapproving of where you’re going with this, but the blond just stares.
“I am looking at you.”
You laugh, shaking your head and standing again. “Good luck with Tinder, Tsukki, but I’m outta here-”
There’s a 6’3” wall in your way when you try to leave.
“You really need to get over that shit.”
You whip your head up to look into Tsukki’s eyes, affronted.
“ Excuse me?”
He’s unyielding, golden eyes hard on yours. “I’m not taking that as a valid reason. Come up with something else if you really don’t want to do this.”
“Tsukki-”
“Give me a better reason, Y/n.”
“It makes no sense, Tsukishima!” You scoff, all but laughing in his face. “Not a single person is going to believe that we’re together. We’re going to look stupid together-”
“I don’t think we look stupid together,” He cuts you short, turning to Yamaguchi. “Do you think we look stupid together?”
Tadashi flicks his gaze back and forth from Tsukki’s to yours, clearly torn. When he sighs and it becomes clear he’s about to take Tsukki’s side, you gape at him.
“Yamaguchi!”
He gives you a regretful look. “It’s not unreasonable , Y/n. People already wonder what you two are, anyway.” He rolls his eyes when you stare at him in disbelief, lifting his hands helplessly. “We all know you balance him out. Think of the good you could do, whipping this idiot into shape.”
Tsukki turns to you with a victorious smile, eyebrows lifted. “Consider me whipped.”
You groan, snatching your bag off the floor and pushing past them. “Goodbye.”
Tsukki’s slipping his shoes on at the door with you, only snatching his keys from the bowl when you shoot him a questioning glare.
“It’s getting late,” is all he says as he props the door open for you.
You’re about to remind him that 7pm in the summer is not that late, but the flash of a camera catches your attention. You turn, shielding your eyes from the paparazzi snapping pictures at the end of the driveway.
“Don’t you have a family to spend time with or something?” Tsukki says over your head, his voice tense.
You elbow him hard. “You really gotta stop giving them what they want,” You grumble, stomping down the front steps. The blink of Tsukki’s headlights and the gentle purr of his car remote-starting is the only response he gives you, and you trudge over to the passenger-side door. You wave tiredly at the cameraman standing just past the gate and give him a smile.
“I’d love to say he’s above hitting you with his car, but he’s having a bad day.”
The man chuckles at your joke. “I suppose I shouldn’t take any chances, then.” He takes a few more photos, but he steps out of the way regardless.
Tsukki stares at you when you settle in next to him with a sigh.
“How do you do that? I had to break a guy’s camera to get his ass off the hood of my car.”
You shrug, closing your eyes and leaning against the headrest. “It’s not groundbreaking work, Tsukki. Try being nice once in a while.”
He drives you home in silence.
You keep your eyes on the sideview mirror, watching the unmarked van that’s trailing the car the whole way there.
What would be the difference, really, if you pretend to date Tsukishima Kei? You already get followed home and to classes. You already hear all the whispers when you walk anywhere with him. You’re already all over the internet, comments about your body plastered everywhere for the world to see.
It doesn’t really matter that you’re not interested in Tsukki, does it? It’d be laughable for anyone to question that you could fall for him – he’s tall and objectively gorgeous. Everyone wants him.
The issue is you.
You’ve seen the girls he goes home with at parties.
Your eyes shift from the unmarked van to your own reflection, and you chuckle under your breath.
Yes, you’re good for Tsukishima Kei – you manage his unacceptably short temper. You support him unconditionally and keep him in check. You always have. You’re everything Management needs from him.
But the issue is still you.
“Would you cut it out?”
You blink, turning to look at Tsukki’s side profile while he drives. He’s got one hand on the steering wheel, the other tapping an irritated rhythm on the middle console. He shifts his eyes briefly in your direction before lifting them to watch the van behind you, his jaw clenching and unclenching.
“What?” You say, the silence in the car a bit suffocating.
“I’m asking you to cut it the fuck out. Whatever’s going on in your head – cut it out.”
You lift a brow. “And what would that be?”
“I don’t know, Y/n – whatever insane shit you think about yourself.” He shakes his head, pulling into the parking lot of your apartment complex. Thankfully, it’s a big one with hundreds of units, and the paparazzi have always had the sense not to follow you in.
He pulls up to the main door, putting the car in park and leaning back in his seat with a tight sigh. You both watch the van pull up in front of you, the man on the passenger’s side hopping out and snapping photos of the two of you staring back at him.
“Look,” He says quietly, in a way that reeks of an oncoming argument. You can see him gripping the middle console like he’s stopping himself from getting out of the car. “I know what people say about you. The comments they make about your body and your looks and everything else.”
You stare out the window, nodding. It’s amazing how desensitized you’ve become to the barrage of flashing lights that comes with Tsukishima Kei. “I’ve been hearing it since we were kids-”
“Yeah, exactly. Since we were kids , Y/n. Are you gonna let this be an issue for the rest of our lives?”
You look at him, your skin flushing with anger. “What are you trying to say? It’s not like you have the same problems I do.”
He meets your eyes, gaze burning. “I’m telling you to get the fuck over yourself. Are you gonna listen to a bunch of assholes who don’t matter? Or are you gonna listen to me ?” When your jaw drops, he pushes. “If you don’t want to do this, that’s fine. I’ll let it go. But not if this is your reason.”
“My reason, Kei -” You spit, matching his anger. “-is that I don’t feel like being the laughing stock of your little fanbase.”
“And you think this is gonna stop them?” He smiles, but it’s irritated. “You want me to find some supermodel to date? You think they won’t make comparisons between you and the girl on my arm?”
You hadn’t thought of that.
That you wouldn’t be the pathetic, pining girl trailing after Tsukishima Kei anymore.
You’d be the jealous friend.
Pathetic, pining, jealous little Y/n.
A light flashes in your periphery, and a headline flashes with it – a week from now, when the Sendai Frogs have confirmed his new, unnamed girlfriend to the public.
Tsukishima Kei and Friend Y/l/n Y/n Seen Arguing – New Relationship the Cause?
You’re unable to stop the aggravated growl that spills out when you sigh through your nose.
“They think they know who you are, Y/n. But they don’t. They fucked it up.” Tsukki keeps your gaze locked on his – his eyes are dangerous, like he’s predicting the headlines, too.
He leans toward you. “So show them,” He says. “ Show them who you are.”
You lean forward, too, your face a little too close to his.
“And how do you suggest I do that, Kei?”
The camera flashes, and your chest flickers with some unknown excitement.
His smile is wicked, mocking.
“ Fix me.” He lifts a brow when you glare, doubling down. “Or be the girl that watches someone else do it.”
You kind of want to kill him.
–
You lie facedown on your bed for hours that night, listening as Kiyoko laughs on your couch. She lives in the same complex, only a few floors above you, and she’d made the long journey all the way here just to laugh at you.
She stays with you the whole night, laughing until she cries. And then she laughs some more, because that picture of you in Tsukki’s car is already circulating the internet.
“You’re so fucked,” Kiyoko heaves between breaths, sometime around 2am. She’d moved to the bed with you hours ago, scrolling through Twitter and showing you some of the more unhinged reactions to the photo.
[12:24 AM] TsukkiFan0927 : no because they MUST be fucking????
[1:07 AM] user9329348 : those two have always been so shady together,,, no way that this is new
[1:46 AM] TsukkiYnShipper : TSUKKIYN NATION WE RIDE AT DAWN
You just groan, dragging your phone out and pulling up your text thread with Tsukki.
[2:09 AM]
You: my life would be so peaceful without you in it
He responds immediately.
Tsukki: ill pick you up tomorrow <3
Tsukishima Kei is nothing but trouble.
–
There are an unusual amount of paparazzi outside your apartment complex the next morning.
You stop short when you exit the building, taken aback.
Everyone stares back, no lights flashing. They just stare.
“Uh-Good morning?” You say, blinking at the group of about 15 people. One or two wave in greeting, but no one else wants to break the seal.
No one wants to ask, not yet.
You pull out your phone, about to text Tsukki to hurry the fuck up before things get weirder, but you hear the purr of his car pulling into the lot before you can send it.
The seal breaks all at once.
You lose sight of the car, flashing lights all going off at the same time and effectively blinding you.
You hear your name, over and over again.
“ Y/n, is it true? ”
“ Over here, Y/n! ”
“ What did you two talk about in his car last night, Y/n ?”
There’s a hand on your arm, wrapped tight around your bicep. You inhale sharply, worried that you’re about to be mauled on the very first day of dating Tsukishima Kei.
“ Move your feet, dumbfuck. ”
Oh. It’s him.
“ Mm-kay ,” You mumble, letting Tsukki drag you to his car and all but throw you in the front seat.
Somehow, the lights are worse in here, and you can’t tell if your name is still being called or if that’s just an echo ringing in your ears.
Tsukki climbs in beside you and slams the door. “Put your seatbelt on.”
“Why?” You ask, already grabbing for it.
He shifts gears jerkily, and you go flying against the door as he peels out of the lot.
“Tsukki!” You scold, hearing his tires squeal against the pavement.
“You were too slow,” He jokes, eyes on the rearview mirror. You turn, spotting the army of vans that are following behind him.
“Dude,” You breathe, sinking down into the seat. “It was one picture .”
“Regret anything yet?” He says, catching the light just before it turns red and leaving all the vans behind.
“I regret everything,” You say without hesitation. “All of it. Every second.”
When he doesn’t respond, you turn to him. He’s got his eyes on the road and the mirrors, seemingly calm. But his teeth wear down on the inside of his lip, and he’s not sparing you a single glance.
You sigh, nudging him gently. “I’m kidding.”
He gives easily, lip released from its torture. “You’re sure?”
“Yes, Tsukki. It’s fine.”
“We’re good?”
“We’re good ,” You say, smiling when he scoffs. “It’s better than me being labeled the sad, jealous friend while you date some airhead that’s after your fame and fortune.”
He grins then. “Aw, you’re not that much of an airhead.”
“Let’s break up.”
He laughs the whole way to campus.
–
You finally understand why Tsukki snaps at the paparazzi.
They’re everywhere – outside your classes and at your favorite cafe. Just two of them, but you’re uncomfortably familiar with them by the end of your second class. You’d given up sometime around lunch, turning in place on your way to the dining hall and asking if they just wanted to walk with you instead of trailing behind.
You eat your lunch with Hiro from SMZ and Nariko from Sendai Sports that day. You don’t answer a single question of theirs, just smiling and spooning rice into your mouth as you ask about their lives instead.
They’re bemused at your strange approach, and you play this game all afternoon with them – by the time Tsukki’s practice is over, you’re hoping you’ve gained at least some of their favor.
Hopefully, they’ll post nice things about you. Only the good photos, maybe.
Still, the air shifts when they realize you’re heading for the university’s gym – Tsukki practices on campus with a private coach in the afternoons, going to the Frogs’ gym to practice after classes are done.
You can see them itching to lift their cameras, itching to ask the same questions again.
When did it start? Are you official? How did it happen?
The building comes into view, and you spot his blond hair near the entrance. You clear your throat.
“So… I think I’m gonna have to leave you here,” You say, gesturing around you now that you’re at the base of the stairs.
They both look dejected, like they were hoping for an introduction. You just give them a thin smile and turn, hurrying up the stairs before they decide to stop being respectful of your boundaries.
Tsukki’s got his eyes over your shoulder as you approach.
“What’d they want?”
“To know my regular order at the dining hall,” You say simply. You stop a friendly distance away, seeing when he eyes the space between you. His smirk speaks before he does.
“You forgot a few feet.”
You grimace, taking a single step toward him. He takes the rest, his body brushing briefly against yours.
You look up at him expectantly. “How should I greet you?”
“However you want.”
“I wouldn’t suppose a friendly hug would do.”
A light flashes when he smiles down at you, and you’re wondering if the world’s ever seen it before.
“No,” He says, humored. “I don’t suppose it would. But a not-friendly hug might.”
You stare down at your shoes, thankful your back is to the cameras.
It’s a bit strange to realize, but you’ve never hugged Tsukki before. Not really.
A casual pat on the back, yes. The occasional side-hug, maybe.
But a hug – despite its simplicity, its lack of meaning – is not something you can ever remember doing with him.
You think of how you hug Tadashi, how you’d hug Hinata or even Kageyama after a game in high school. It’s so easy with them.
The idea of Tsukishima Kei wrapping his arms around you is… odd.
Very odd.
Still, you’ve wasted enough time already. It’s the only option.
You lift your arms, wondering if you resemble a petulant child, and Tsukki just grins and bends down, his bag slipping off his shoulder when he slides his arms around your waist. You’re pulled onto your toes, face hidden in the crook of his neck.
Hugging Tsukishima Kei is not what you’d expected.
You’d always seen him as some cold wall of annoyance – a big, dumb athlete who was always a little painful to smack on the chest after a crude remark. A boy who’d always been rough, who’d grown strong and become some untouchable statue made of cold marble.
But he’s not cold at all.
The air around him is warm, smelling just slightly of sweat from practice but more than anything of that scent that’s distinctly Tsukki . That clean smell that you’d unknowingly grown to associate with comfort. That unplaceable warmth that smells like your childhood.
His hands are bigger than you’d realized, fingers long and warm against the small of your back. His chest is just as hard as always – that unmoveable wall that towers over you – but it feels weird against yours. It feels weird to feel his heartbeat – have you never felt his heartbeat before? Has he always had one?
You wonder if he can feel that your cheeks burn against his neck, if the heat is notable in this little pocket of quiet you’ve found. If your skin warms under his fingers, which rest strangely against the spot where your shirt’s ridden up a bit.
“ How was practice? ” You mumble shyly against his throat, feeling when he swallows hard. You can’t decide if it’s his heart or your own that you’re hearing right now, pounding somewhere near your ears.
“‘ s fine, ” He says, and you hear the hitch in his breath.
This is weird for him, too, then.
Good. That’s good. This is weird for both of you. You’re not alone in this.
You pull away, clearing your throat quietly. Tsukki lets you slide carefully down to your feet, his fingers skimming the skin under your shirt just before he pulls away, his movements rushed and sharp.
Your skin burns where his fingers had been, and trying to ignore it only makes you more aware of it.
You glance briefly up at him, unable to control the double-take you do when you see him. He won’t meet your eyes, but his face is radiating heat, a blush high on his cheeks and his ears a rather interesting shade of red.
You watch him glance at your ears, too, and the tiny smirk he suppresses tells you that you don’t look much better.
You swallow, wondering where the hell this humming under your skin’s come from.
“Uh-” Your breath catches when his golden eyes meet yours, and you recover clumsily. “I have-”
What do you have?
Class.
“I have to get to class,” You blurt, blinking rapidly.
He just blinks back, as though he’d also forgotten why you’d met him here.
“Right,” He says. “Class. I’ll walk you.”
“Okay,” You respond, turning on your heel and heading down the stairs. You hear him follow after you, but then there’s a hurried shuffle behind you, the lights of the paparazzi flashing in a frenzy.
You turn back quickly, finding Tsukki tripping over his own feet to get back up the stairs, his bag left abandoned at the top.
You can’t help the wide smile that spreads across your face, and you know the flashes that follow are for you.
Tsukki snatches his bag up and turns to you, spotting your teasing grin before you can smother it.
He rolls his eyes, stomping to catch up with you.
“Shut up.”
You laugh the whole way to the crosswalk.
–
Kei doesn’t know what’s wrong with him.
He doesn’t understand why he feels so skittish, why his fingers are a bit numb. He doesn’t know why he keeps looking at you, what he could possibly be searching for when he watches you.
His eyes scan you while he walks you across campus to your next class. He barely notices the people whispering around you, his gaze tracking the uneven rise and fall of your chest and the white-knuckled grip you have on your bag.
Okay. So you felt it, too.
Good. He’s not crazy.
The memory of your skin under his fingers flashes through his mind. You’d been so soft – he hadn’t realized how soft you are. He’d never even considered it. Soft and warm, heartbeat racing against his chest and arms wrapped tight around his neck. Breath shaky and fanning out over his skin when you’d whispered something about practice.
His fingers itch to touch you again, because he’d never thought to do that, either.
Fuck. He probably is going crazy.
He clears his throat, watching when your fingers twitch on your bag in response.
“We, uh-” He lets out a breath, seeing your building come into view and wanting to say something – anything – to smooth this silence over before you leave. “-probably shouldn’t do things for the first time in public like that again.”
It works. You laugh under your breath.
“Why? Scared to look like an idiot again?”
Okay, it’s at his expense. But you laughed.
“I’m sure you didn’t look so great yourself,” He says, biting down a grin when you smile.
“That’s too bad,” You say, a teasing edge in your tone. “I was just about to hold your hand.”
Kei chokes, his cough loud and embarrassed. He shoots you a glare when you glance up at him in amusement.
“I swallowed a bug.”
“A bug,” You repeat, nodding and turning away to hide your laugh. “Still think it’s so easy to act, Tsukki?”
He wants to go back in time and beat his past self into shutting the hell up for once.
But that’s not an option, so he just braces himself and shifts minimally closer to you, the back of his hand brushing up against yours.
He feels you falter beside him, and it gives him just enough courage to do it.
Your hands are a lot smaller than he’d realized. But your fingers slot easily with his.
He can’t tell if it’s his hand or yours that’s clammy, but he’s tempted to say it’s yours because this has never once happened to him before. Not a single one of the girls he’d ever dated had made his palms sweat, so it can’t be him. Had any boys before him ever made you nervous like this?
Had there been any boys before him?
“Is this your first time?” He vomits those words right out, hating every fiber of his being once it’s done.
You look up at him, so taken aback that you visibly become less nervous. “Holding hands with a boy?” You say, smiling mockingly. “No, Tsukki. This isn’t my first time. Sorry to disappoint.”
He rolls his eyes, flushing. “Not what I meant.”
“I know.” You laugh to yourself, pausing outside the building where he’s meant to leave you. He can see people lingering, but no one’s close enough to hear your conversation.
“You know I’ve had boyfriends before, right?” You level him with that teasing look you always have.
Had you? Had he known that?
Oh, God , you totally had. He remembers now, the guy from first year whose face he’s forgotten. And the summer fling after him.
He knows this. Of course he knows this – why hadn’t he remembered?
How far had you gone with them? Had you told him?
“So,” He swallows. “You’ve…” He trails off and hopes you’ll understand, but you just frown up at him. He sighs. “You’ve done… everything, then?”
Your expression changes to one of alarm, and he all but feels the air between you warm.
“ Why ?” You ask, your tone sharp and your voice lowered to a whisper. “Do you plan on changing the answer if I say no?”
Kei’s heart flies to his throat, and his face burns with a horrible, horrible heat.
“No, I-”
Why the fuck had he asked you that? Why does that matter? What’s he so curious for?
“Y/n,” He starts, holding tight when you start to pull away. He hadn’t even realized you were still holding hands. “Fuck. That’s not what I meant.”
Your face is still burning with embarrassment, and you mumble a response up to him, glancing around.
“You know that’s not gonna happen, right?”
“ Yes- ” He sighs, frustrated and more than a little humiliated. “I’m not expecting-It was a stupid question. I was just curious.”
“You gonna be okay, player?” You ask, and he thinks maybe he’s just seen the ghost of a teasing grin on your face, but he can’t tell. “You ever been celibate before?”
“God, please leave me the hell alone,” He groans, laughing pathetically and dropping your hand to rub the heat out of his cheeks. You definitely smile then, suddenly enjoying his embarrassment more than anything.
He realizes after a moment that people are starting to file out of different buildings – it must be passing period, then.
“You should go,” He says, nudging you toward your building.
You nod, stepping back toward him and lifting onto your toes to wrap your arms around his neck again. His breath hitches, and he barely manages to loop his arms around your waist.
You’re just as soft as you were the first time.
You lower away from him, and he realizes distantly some other students are taking photos and whispering. But you just smile briefly up at him, your voice gentle.
“Not so weird that time.”
Was it not?
He nods dumbly and smiles when you wave bye.
When you’re gone, he has no clue what to do with himself. What is he supposed to be doing right now?
Class in an hour and practice downtown afterward. Right.
He turns on his heel, ignoring everyone’s stares and trying his hardest to squash the stupid look on his face as he walks back toward his car.
He’s about halfway there when his phone buzzes with a text.
[2:47 PM]
You: and for your stupid information
You: i have done a lot
You: but no
You: i have not done everything
You: goodbye
Kei has to take a seat on the nearest bench, ignoring the paparazzi and random underclassmen that are following him.
He sits and stares down at nothing, wondering why the thought of you being a virgin is making his head spin and his ears ring. Wondering – as he drops his head into his hands and sighs loudly – why his palms are so fucking sweaty.
–
“You told him what ?”
You groan, throwing yourself back on your mattress. Kiyoko clambers onto the bed after you, shaking you violently.
“ Why would you tell him you’re a virgin?!”
“Because I am ?” You laugh pathetically, hiding your face in your hands. She just shakes you again.
“But why did you tell him ?!”
“I don’t know! He asked!”
“ What?! ”
“ Kiyoko- ” You protest and turn over, assuming your standard face-down position of dread. “I don’t know. It just happened. And it was weird.”
“Well, what did he say-”
“Nothing!” You toss your phone next to her on the bed, hearing her unlock it and search through your messages. “Nothing, because there’s nothing he can say. It’s not like there’s anything to do about it.”
There’s a silence from her, one that prompts you to look at her. She just stares at you, disbelieving.
“I mean,” She starts. “Do you know that for sure?”
You hide your face again. “Shut up. We agreed that things wouldn’t get that far. There’s literally no reason for us to ever do that.”
“No, I get that-” She coughs, and you figure that she’s hiding a laugh. “-but he did ask… and you did tell him…”
“ Kiyoko, ” You whine, pulling your pillow over your head for good measure while you complain, your voice muffled. “ I can barely hug the guy without it being weird. ”
You hadn’t lied. It was definitely easier the second time, and even easier the third time, when he’d picked you up from your last class and driven you home before he’d left for practice downtown.
It had not, however, been a comfortable ride home, because you two had just sat in uncertain silence – uncertain, because neither of you could fathom why you would ever tell him how far you’d gone before him.
And it had not been easy the fourth time he’d hugged you, in front of your building and about ten reporters. Because he’d turned his head just enough to brush his lips tentatively over your cheek, and you’d stilled in his arms, your face thankfully hidden in his chest again.
You couldn’t bear for the internet to see the look on your face the first time Tsukishima Kei had ever kissed you.
He’d gotten into his car and driven off, and you’d run upstairs and called Kiyoko without a second thought.
You can barely hug him, and that sad excuse for a kiss had put you on high alert.
There’s absolutely no world in which it would be natural for you to have sex with Tsukishima Kei. No world in which it could ever be considered.
“Okay,” Kiyoko laughs when you groan in fresh embarrassment. “I’m sure you’ll get used to doing the smaller things in public with him.”
You’re about groan again, but a quiet ding comes from Kiyoko’s palms.
“Uh-” She cuts short, and your stomach flips nervously.
“ What’s it say? ” You mumble, knowing it’s him.
She clears her throat awkwardly, and your nerves worsen.
“He wants to come over.”
You wither, there in your hiding spot, and mumble a pathetic response.
“ Okay. Sure. ”
–
“Do you… want to shower?” You gesture lamely down the hall to your bathroom, Tsukki standing awkwardly in the foyer with his bag.
You see him swallow hard, and you realize how it’d come out.
“Because you’re gross,” You blurt, watching his eyebrows fly up and his tense expression become a teasing grin.
“Yeah, I got it the first time, Y/n,” He says, padding into your living room. “But thanks for clarifying.”
You flush, watching him drop his bag and head for your dresser. He plucks a set of his own clothes out of the bottom drawer, chuckling to himself as he does it.
“I probably shouldn’t stay long. If I leave in different clothes, things’ll get weird downstairs.”
And then there’s silence, because he’d said it without considering the rather salient implications of that sentence.
You sigh when the bathroom door clicks shut, falling onto your bed and contemplating hiding your face again.
He emerges after ten minutes, as you’re texting a very nosy Kiyoko. He stares down at you until you nervously lift your eyes to his. And then he takes a breath.
“We good?”
You hadn’t realized how much you needed such a simple question.
“Yeah,” You say with a breath of laughter. “We’re good.”
His relief is apparent in the way he throws himself down beside you and extracts his own phone, opening Twitter. You’re both quiet for a while, scrolling through his feed together and seeing that his name is trending.
“ ‘#tsukkiyn ’,” He says, snorting. “Look at us, going viral.”
You see a video of him tripping over his feet on the stairs of the gym, scrambling for his bag, and you purse your lips to keep from laughing.
“Look at you. You’re a wreck.”
“Shut up,” He laughs, scrolling past it to a photo of the two of you walking across campus. He’s got his fingers interlaced with yours – it must have been the moment he’d done it, because your eyes are bugged out with shock.
Tsukki laughs loudly, immediately liking and retweeting it without thinking. You gasp.
“ Tsukishima Kei- ”
His notifications flood with replies and likes, the whole world seeming to react all at once.
[6:59 PM] tsukkiynstan77 : HELLO??? IS THIS CONFIRMATION????
[6:59 PM] kookooforkei : NO FUCKING SHOTTTTT NO FUCKING SHOT TSUKISHIMA KEI
[6:59 PM] sendaitsukki : I FOUND HER @ EVERYONE I FUCKING FOUND IT IT’S @/ynlovely !!!
“Uh oh,” Tsukki says under his breath, turning to look at you. You stare at him, a singular moment of silence between you before catastrophe.
Your phone starts to buzz incessantly, your notifications blowing up in a surge of sudden city-wide attention. You both stare at your phone screen, watching the notifications come in so fast that your phone starts to lump them all together.
15 New Notifications
16 New Notifications
17 New Notifications
99+ New Notifications
You stare at it, watching your phone glitch and struggle, and all you can do is laugh.
“Are you… Are you stupid?”
“I think so,” He says immediately, nodding beside you. “I definitely think that’s possible.”
A text notification stands out over the rest, its ding different than the others.
[7:01 PM]
Kiyoko: im going to assume your sudden lack of response means that youre fucking that man right now.
Your eyes go wide, and you drop your phone on your face in your haste to hide the screen. Tsukki coughs next to you, and you spot the telltale burn of embarrassment on his face as he turns away.
“ Fucking bitch ,” You mumble, snatching your phone up and rolling onto your side to hide from him.
[7:01 PM]
You: you fkin gbtich
Kiyoko: oh, did he see???
Kiyoko: oops :))
You hear snickering behind you, and you turn to find Tsukki peering over your shoulder at the texts. You gasp, and he reaches over to pluck the phone away from you.
“What do we have here?” He asks, standing from your bed and taking three giant strides to get away from you.
“ Tsukki! ” You roll off clumsily, chasing after him in a panic. “Don’t read those-”
“ ‘You need to kiss him for real ’,” He reads aloud, sidestepping you as you chase him all around your shoebox of an apartment. “‘ I saw the pics of him kissing you out front, that shit was pathetic- ’ What the fuck?” He stops, lifting the phone over his head to read it again. “I’m not pathetic -”
“Give me-” You jump, knocking the phone from his hand and onto the couch. “-my phone, you fuck.” You retrieve it, glaring up at him. “Those are private-”
“Was it really pathetic?” He asks, entirely caught up in this. “I thought it was fine.”
You roll your eyes, going into your notification settings and muting everything related to Twitter. “It was fine.”
He just pulls his phone out, and you catch him scrolling.
He’d searched for photos of the kiss.
“You’re joking,” You say, dropping down onto the couch and shaking your head. “It was fine , Tsukki.”
He just hums, unconvinced, and throws himself down, all but sitting on you. “Look at this.” He shows you a photo, zoomed in to where his lips barely touch your face. “That’s pretty bad.”
It is pretty bad.
You purse your lips, hiding your laugh when you see how he scowls down at his screen. “I’m sure we’ll get better at it.”
He doesn’t respond, just staring down at the photo. And then he locks his phone, tossing it down next to him.
“I thought it’d be easier than this.”
“I told you it wouldn’t be,” You say, smiling pitifully. “Regret anything yet?”
He snorts, shaking his head and combing his fingers through his wet hair. “Unfortunately, it looks you’re stuck with me. I talked to Management after practice.”
You shift, your interest piqued. “And?”
“They approved.” He throws you a half-laugh. “Obviously.”
“Do they know it’s fake?”
“Oh, please-” He waves your question away. “The whole team knows it’s fake. I was getting my ass handed to me 24 hours ago.”
You wring your hands together nervously. “And they’re all cool with it?”
“They like you more than they like me.”
“I barely know them.”
“Exactly.” He sighs. “Trust me, they want this to work just as much as we do. There’s too much riding on this.”
You nod, feeling a bit of relief seep into you. If the Frogs are on board with this, it can’t be a terrible idea, right?
“Anything they need me to do in particular?”
He shoots you a grin. “Make me a decent person?”
You grimace. “Bit above my pay-grade.”
He rolls his eyes. “They want me to have a social media presence. Pictures, tweets, teasing comments – that kinda thing.”
You blink. “So, earlier-”
“Come on,” He levels you with a deadpan stare. “You really think I’m stupid?”
“Extremely, yes.”
Tsukki just rolls his eyes, snatching his phone up and laying his body across yours.
“Smile, baby .”
You spend an hour getting manhandled into different angles and positions, your debut as Tsukishima Kei’s girlfriend consisting of poorly shot selfies and a head of blond hair in your face.
“Go home , Tsukki,” You finally say, shoving him off of you and wiping your cheek where he’d just licked you like a freak. “You’re getting on my nerves.”
He just laughs, scrolling through his cursed camera roll. He picks one out from the collection of blurred shots and ugly laughing.
“What about this one?”
It’s one of Tsukki biting your face. Your eyes are squeezed shut as his mouth opens over your face, teeth clamped down on your cheek. You’ve got one hand curled into his hair, the other gripping the side of his neck as you try to shove him off of you, but it’s obvious you’re mid-laughter.
You stare down at it, hating that it’s perfect.
“Yeah, okay, fine.”
Tsukki snickers, sending it to you. “You post it. It’s weird if I do it.”
You roll your eyes, opening Twitter and ignoring the million notifications in order to type a simple tweet with the photo attached.
[8:22 PM] ynlovely : freak. [photo attached]
It’s met with instant engagement, but Tsukki only adds to it, retweeting it just a minute later with his own comment.
[8:23 PM] tsukei : i got that dog in me
He’s out of your apartment before he has time to apologize, but – somehow – the headlines are faster.
Sendai Frogs Middle Blocker Tsukishima Kei Dating Longtime Friend: Confirmed
–
Despite the rocky start, things become surprisingly easy over the course of the next week.
The topic of kissing doesn’t come up again, but you find Tsukki making a habit of pecking you quickly on the cheek whenever you part ways, one hand in yours and the other on your waist. You follow his lead, grabbing him by the front of his shirt and pulling him down to your height when you want to plant a kiss on his face, laughter shared between you when you find new and strange places to put it. One on the bridge of his nose, another on his jawline just under his ear.
One accidentally smacked against the corner of his mouth in your rush to get to class on Friday morning.
A photo of Tsukki crouching against the wall of your department had circulated Twitter only minutes after that, his face hidden in his hands but ears clearly burning a beautifully bright, summery red.
You hadn’t realized it then – that one accidental moment could call into question the validity of your relationship with Tsukishima Kei.
–
Your eyes scan over the most recent tweets under the ‘ #tsukkiyn ’ tag as you sit in a cafe on Friday afternoon, a strange dread settling deep in your gut.
Everything before – the excited commentary and overwhelming chaos related to the announcement of your relationship – had been due to the novelty of it all. The newness of Tsukishima as a taken man.
But this photo, where it’s apparent that Tsukki is flustered and unfamiliar with you in a romantic capacity, brings to attention a lot of the assumed details of your relationship.
You skim the tweets that address the issue, Tsukishima fans and haters alike all asking the same questions.
Why would he be so caught off guard by a simple gesture of affection? Something that can’t even be considered a kiss?
Isn’t it the case that you two had been dating for a while in secret and are only now confirming the relationship publicly?
Is it a bit suspicious that the announcement of a relationship had comes only hours after a series of reputation-ruining headlines for the Sendai Frogs’ most promising rookie?
And there, posted only mere minutes ago, is someone who’d half-guessed at the truth.
[12:20 PM] numberonekei : lol the frogs probably paid her to be his fake gf to make him seem more likeable. not like shes actually his type.
You lock your phone, throwing it in your bag with a sigh and reaching for your coffee.
Nariko from Sendai Sports is sitting only a table away. She’d been with you almost all week, and you’d come to find some strange comfort in her presence – she’s proven herself to be a normal human being just doing her job.
Even now, she looks up from some shots on her camera when you sigh, and you feel her looking you over.
“Rough day?”
You smile wryly, pulling some books out to get work done. “Just glad it’s almost the weekend.”
“That’s a vague answer if I’ve ever heard one.”
You laugh. “Any weekend plans?”
She waves her camera at you in explanation, and you nod with a hum of understanding. She eyes you just a moment longer before returning to her shots.
“I’ve been curating only the best photos of you, if that makes your day any less bad.”
You snort into your coffee. “It does, thank you.” And then you swallow, figuring it wouldn’t be too much detail to mention some things to her. “Just getting used to it all. The attention.”
“People kind of suck, huh?”
“Kind of,” You agree, staring down at your textbook without really seeing it. And then you blink, shaking yourself out of it. “It’s fine. I’ll feel better once he gets here.”
She looks up at you again, and you find minor surprise in her expression. “Is he really that good of a boyfriend? He’s kind of…”
“An asshole?” You smile, enjoying the breath of laughter she lets out. “He’s… hard to explain. You gotta think about how this might all feel for him, too, I guess.” There’s a moment of silence, one where she looks like she might understand what you’re saying, but it’s interrupted by a quiet knock on the cafe window.
You look up, finding Tadashi and Kiyoko, both of them gesturing for you to join them. You furrow a brow, reaching over for your bag, but there’s a hand there already.
“I texted you, loser,” Tsukki says, opening your bag and closing your textbook. “What’re you dissociating about?”
He clearly had not seen Nariko sitting fifteen feet away.
You shake your head, helping him collect your things and hoping she views your dynamic as one of playful banter. “Nothing, you ass. It’s just been a long morning.”
Tsukki crouches next you then, taking your face in one hand and forcing you to look at him. “Yeah, you look like shit.”
“Thank you. I do try.”
He only stares, scanning your face. “What happened?” It’s less of a question and more of a demand.
“Nothing, Tsukki,” You say, trying to shake him off. “Let’s just go.”
But he’s reaching for your phone, unlocking it before you can stop him.
“Tsukki, don’t-”
“What’s…” He stares down at your Twitter feed, at the tweet you’d last read. And then he rolls his eyes, sighing heatedly and throwing your phone back in your bag. “I fucking hate the internet. They don’t know what they’re talking about.”
You frown slightly. That person had guessed at your fake relationship, but Tsukki’s denying it while thinking this conversation is private. Why?
He mumbles to himself as he finishes packing your bag. “ What would anyone know what my type is? ‘s bullshit .”
Oh. He’s trying to make you feel better.
“Just forget it, Tsukki,” You say, leaning forward and pressing your lips to the corner of his eyebrow. “I’m not that upset about it.”
“You clearly are,” He snaps. “I’m gonna start kicking people’s asses if they say shit to you.”
You roll your eyes, taking his hand and standing when he offers it to you. “No, you’re not. I’ll kick your ass if you try it.”
He just shrugs. “I’m just saying – teaching by example isn’t a bad idea.”
“Your stupidity amazes me sometimes,” You say, and then you turn to Nariko. “Have a good weekend.”
“I hope your day gets better,” She says, smiling kindly and avoiding eye contact with Tsukki.
He waits until you’re outside to awkwardly mumble, “Was she there the whole time?”
“Yes, she was. You’re just an idiot.”
“Who’s an idiot?” Kiyoko asks as you approach. When you gesture up at Tsukki, she smiles plainly. “Well, lucky for us, he’s just a dumb athlete and not a rocket scientist.”
Yamaguchi laughs a little too loud and is forced to run back to Tsukki’s car with the blond on his heels.
–
“So… Tsukki won’t tell me anything about how things are going with you two…” Yamaguchi leans in close to you. The Frogs have a home game on Sunday, so you sit with him and Kiyoko in the stands at their gym, half-watching their two-hour practice as you work on some assignments.
You turn to the freckled boy now, an eyebrow raised.
“Okay…?”
He smiles, and you catch Kiyoko snickering to herself on his other side. She meets your eye and shrugs.
“Social media can only say so much.”
Yamaguchi nods, his smile conspiratorial. “A little hug here, a little kiss on the cheek there…”
“That’s about it, Tadashi,” You say slowly. His grin widens.
“Yeah? Nothing else?” When you don’t respond, he and Kiyoko start to nudge each other. “Nothing about someone’s virginity?”
You gasp, flushing hard. It hadn’t come up again all week, and you’d nearly forgotten about it.
“What the- fuck -” You shut your notebook and reach around Yamaguchi to smack Kiyoko with it. “You were not supposed to tell anyone!”
Kiyoko laughs as you hit her repeatedly. The ruckus catches the attention of some of the players below as they take a water break, and you’re met with Tsukki’s questioning stare, Koganegawa and Kyoutani on either side of him with bemused smiles. You wave lamely at them, aiming one last smack at your giggling friends before putting your notebook down.
“I needed someone else to join me in my exasperation,” Kiyoko says, leaning close and creating a secretive huddle for the three of you to whisper. “You two were acting weird and it had only been, like, 10 hours of dating.”
“It was just a fluke!” You whisper-yell, boxing Yamaguchi in as you argue. “It’s not exactly a smooth transition from 15 years of friendship into something romantic.”
“Something romantic , huh?” Yamaguchi throws a traitorous arm over your shoulder. “Do tell, Y/n.”
“You know what I mean. It was a rocky start, and there may or may not have been some oversharing along the way.” Your face is still hot from having to explain, but you want to cut these two off before they can start concocting stupid ideas.
“Yeah, well, you’re not out of the woods yet,” Kiyoko says, her grin a little evil. “I’ve seen what people are saying today – they’re not exactly convinced that you two are the Hallmark movie you need to be.”
You grimace. “What do you want me to do? We’re moving at a decent pace, I think.”
“ Decent pace ?” Yamaguchi snickers. “You kiss Tsukki the way I kiss my grandma.”
“I don’t have time to unpack that sentence, Tadashi,” You joke, wishing this conversation could end already. “But-” You sigh in frustration. “Fine. I see what you’re both saying. I just don’t know how to fix it.”
“It’s not like you need to give him a lap dance, Y/n,” He says. “But something needs to change before the game.” When you just stare at him blankly, he and Kiyoko share a look of disbelief. “You don’t think the whole world’s gonna be watching you that day?”
You deflate. You hadn’t even thought of that.
“What if they win, huh?” Kiyoko prompts. “You gonna give him a high-five, Y/n?”
Yamaguchi nods. “You at least have to kiss him. And if you’re really committed to this-” He glances over your head, eyes going wide as he leans in quickly to whisper in your ear. “- you’re gonna have to make it good. You know sweet, innocent girls aren’t Tsukki’s type .”
You blanche, remembering the joking way that Tsukki had hinted at cute girls not being able to ‘ handle ’ him.
“What are you three scheming about over here?”
You jump, turning quickly to see Tsukki standing over you, hand on hip and eyebrows furrowed in suspicion.
You swallow, shaking your head. “Nothing… Nothing-” You blink, clearing your head. “Practice done?”
He nods, hoisting his gym bag high on his shoulder. “Are we still drinking tonight?”
“Drinking?” You turn to look at your friends. “Where?”
Yamaguchi smiles and lifts his bag, and you realize only now that there’s a quiet clink every time he jostles it.
“Your place.”
–
“Oh. I brought this over.”
Tsukki reaches into his bag, extracting a bright green Frogs jersey and tossing it at you. You catch it without looking, tipping another shot back into your mouth.
The four of you are sitting on the floor around your coffee table, some bottles of liquor and your many preferred mixers strewn on the table with the shot glasses and three bowls of varied snacks. A random movie plays on your TV, the volume low and the plot serving as nothing more than background noise.
You squint at the shirt in your hand, his last name stretched in capital letters across the back. The letters double up and hover a little, your vision not what it should be right now.
“Your… jersey?”
“For Sunday,” He says with no other explanation, just reaching over the table to pour a shot of rum and a splash of Coke into his cup. It spills over the rim a little, and he has to shake his head to clear it as he’s putting the bottle down.
Your heart jumps a little, the reminder of Sunday bringing back Yamaguchi’s words.
‘You’re gonna have to make it good. ’
You glance at Yamaguchi now, seeing that he’s eyeing you with mischief. When he sees the panic tinging your expression, he grins.
“Yeah, Y/n ,” He says, giggling drunkenly. “You gotta look the part so people don’t say you’re not his real girlfriend.” He and Kiyoko lean heavy on each other, and he mumbles to her in a voice that’s a lot louder than he realizes. “ Gotta act the part, too. ”
You glance at Tsukki, finding him staring at the pair over the top of his glasses, his cup halfway to his mouth. His eyes narrow in suspicion at his roommate.
“ Yamaguchi …” He mutters. It’s suspicious, you realize – a warning. You glance between them, wondering what’s happened.
Yamaguchi catches you, his smile wicked. “I think he’s mad at me, Y/n.” He tilts his head toward, his whisper deliberately loud this time. “It’s just that he’s been so blushy lately. I’m dying to know why.”
“Soon enough, you’ll just be dying,” Tsukki says, downing his drink.
Your head spins a little as you look around. Kiyoko and Yamaguchi are both red in the face, the vodka having gotten to them almost an hour ago. Tsukki, too, is undoubtedly drunk – his eyes are heavily lidded, his blinks long and slow. And his fingers rest on the rug, just slightly over yours.
That’s one thing about Tsukishima Kei that’s just so hard to believe – he gets touchy when he drinks. And even if his version of touchy is nothing more than fingertips brushing over the back of your hand every few minutes, it’s touchy nonetheless.
Unfortunately, you get touchy when you drink, too.
And it’s just so truly unfortunate, because your version of touchy isn’t exactly his version of touchy.
“Tsukki,” You start, his name heavy in your mouth. “Do you plan on winning the game on Sunday?”
His golden eyes cut to yours, narrowing with unspoken questions. “That’s usually the goal, yeah.”
You swallow, your heart pounding a little louder than usual. Your drunken mind had really thought he might say no.
“Why?” He asks, but you don’t hear him.
You just sit up on your knees, struggling to put your drink on the table before scooting close to him. You hear Kiyoko gasp behind you, she and Yamaguchi starting to smack each other’s arms when you reach out and take the front of Tsukki’s shirt with both hands.
His eyes widen, and he allows himself to be dragged toward you. “What-Y/n-”
You lean forward, stopping just shy of his mouth and sighing roughly. His breath catches in his throat, and you smell the rum on his tongue.
“Be quiet, Tsukki. For once.”
You can confidently say you’ve never tasted rum quite like this.
It’s quick, but the jolt to your system is sharp, a live wire in your veins.
You pull away with the hint of a gasp, your pulse drumming in your ears. Tsukki stares with wide eyes and parted lips. You think you hear Yamaguchi mumble ‘ Holy shit’ to Kiyoko, but you can’t spare any attention for it.
Tsukki’s eyes flick between yours and then back down to your mouth, and the drumming in your ears skips a few beats.
He leans in before you can pull away.
This kiss is as short as the last, but he lingers this time, alcohol tainting the air that hovers between your lips. You gather the courage to try again before he does, and it’ll only be later that you realize how relieved you are that he tangles his fingers in your hair and kisses you until his courage finds him, too.
His lips are softer than you’d expected – rough and assured, just like everything else about him, but soft nonetheless. You find yourself unshakeably curious to discover if they’re still as soft after just one more kiss. Over and over again, curiosity on repeat. Needing to keep testing it, because there’s an almost desperate need to keep finding out.
Just one more, you think, again and again. One more, and then you’ll stop.
His other hand finds your thigh, palm searing hot against your skin, and his tongue brushes against your bottom lip just as his fingers slide accidentally under the hem of your shorts. Your heart jumps, and your teeth catch ever so softly on his lip. A sound escapes from deep in his throat, one that sounds suspiciously like a groan.
What an addicting little sound it turns out to be.
Just as Tsukki’s fingertips are digging into the plush skin of your thighs, Yamaguchi clears his throat loudly behind you. Kiyoko’s got her hand on your shoulder, pulling you away.
“Y/n,” She says gently, tugging on your sleeve.
You gasp, realizing what’s happened and reeling back quickly. Tsukki’s fingers tighten in your hair for just a second, but he lets you go almost immediately, his eyes wide as he comes to his senses, too.
“What-” He breathes, gaze flicking in a panic between your lips and your eyes. You stare back, your heart pounding in your ears and your head spinning like a carousel. “What was that for?”
You just scan him, watching as a blush blossoms furiously across his cheeks, his chest rising and falling rapidly. You blink, your voice muffled in your ear when you respond.
“Just practicing. For Sunday.”
And then you whirl around, your back pressed against the bottom of the couch as you stare emptily at the TV. Yamaguchi snatches the remote from the floor and boosts the volume until there’s no way you and Tsukki can have a conversation about this.
Kiyoko and Yamaguchi start to whisper furiously to each other after a few minutes, but you and Tsukki stay silent until it gets late enough that you all fall asleep.
–
You wake sometime around 3am, shifting and covering your eyes with a quiet groan when you realize the TV’s still on. The room is completely dark otherwise, so you have to search clumsily around the floor for the remote, still tired but thankfully not drunk anymore.
You only realize Tsukki’s awake and sitting on the couch when you see that the remote is in his hand. His eyes are trained on the screen, unseeing, and he’s got his cup in his other hand. He flicks his gaze down to yours when he senses you looking at him.
“Too bright?” He mumbles, quiet enough not to wake your friends, Kiyoko sleeping on the armchair and Yamaguchi passed out on the rug. You shake your head, joining him on the couch and shivering slightly from the running air conditioner.
“Body heat,” You say plainly, and he rolls his eyes but allows you to press your side against his regardless. “You’re gonna be too hungover for practice tomorrow if you keep drinking.” You gesture to the cup in his hand, watching a slow smirk stretch across his face.
“What’s wrong?” He teases, setting both the cup and the remote on the table in favor of draping his arm around your shoulders with an mocking lift of his eyebrows. “Worried I won’t do well on Sunday? You must really want to kiss me.”
You don’t bother hiding the flush of your cheeks in the dark, too busy rolling your eyes. “You recovered quickly, Tsukishima,” You say, your tone just as airy and full of amusement when his eyes light up a little at the use of his name. “Alcohol got you feeling confident?”
“It had you feeling confident,” He counters, smirk deepening when he sees the embarrassment cross your expression. And then he leans into you, nose brushing against yours and breath fanning across your lips when he whispers to you.
You only realize he’s actually about to kiss you when his gaze drops to your mouth.
“ My turn .”
You suck in a surprised breath, unsure what to do with the excited flutter of your heart when his lips turn out to be just as soft as they were before. Your fingers slide into the hair at the base of his neck, and you shiver when his hand finds your waist, his palm heated even through your shirt.
“Still cold?” He whispers against your lips, angling his head and smiling when you lean into him. You shake your head, because you’re suddenly so, so warm, but then you realize his breath doesn’t smell like rum anymore.
“You were drinking water?” You ask, a flash of heat spreading from the crown of your head down to your toes when he just kisses you again with an amused hum.
“Did you really think I would risk being hungover tomorrow?”
You breathe unsteadily, goosebumps spreading all over your skin when he drops his head and brushes his lips against a spot just under your ear. “Why are you kissing me, Tsukki? You’re sober.”
His breath is warm when it fans out over your throat, his voice low in your ear and muffled against your skin. “ So are you. ”
Your stomach flips. He’s right.
“But I wasn’t the first time.” You lift your brows, mustering as much confidence as you can. “What’s your excuse? You wanna kiss me that bad, Tsukki?”
He lifts his head then, meeting your eyes evenly as a knowing look fills his expression.
“Just practicing, of course – for Sunday.”
The implication brings you pause, and then you laugh, covering your mouth so as to not wake your friends up. Tsukki watches you do it, a matching smile spreading across his lips.
It’s relieving, being able to laugh about this with him.
After an entire week of moments belonging to the public – moments that have meant too much, with too many eyes on them and too much on the line to risk messing them up – this is one moment that belongs only to you and him. One moment when you don’t have to think so hard.
Maybe that’s been the issue all along.
“Tsukki…” You start, meeting his eyes with an idea growing in your head. He hums, watching you closely. “What if we just… stop thinking so much about this?”
He doesn’t say anything for a moment, only offering a long, slow blink. And then he tilts his head, the conspiratorial look in his eye all too enticing. You’ve been seeing that look your whole life.
“You wanna have some fun, Y/n?”
Maybe you’re just as much trouble as he is.
“I could be into that.”
–
It turns out that ‘ having fun ’ looks a lot like you sitting in the packed stands on Sunday afternoon, wearing the name TSUKISHIMA on your back and hiding your phone from your friends as you text him. Both teams are down below doing their pre-game stretches, and you wait for Tsukki to be near his bag pressing send .
You don’t hear the quiet ding from where you sit, but you see his blond head swivel around at the sound. He extracts the phone from his bag, and you watch him read the messages.
[1:21 PM]
You: in case you forgot
You: winning this game comes with the added bonus of me kissing the soul out of your body
You: in front of all these people
You catch the smile that creeps out just before he smothers it, and your own smile is hidden behind your hand. He looks around, searching the bleachers until he finds you. He shakes his head at you, typing rapidly and sending his response just as Koganegawa’s approaching him.
[1:24 PM]
Tsukki: dont threaten me with a good time, you freaky little dementor
Tsukki: you WILL be paying up when i make the winning point
You snort into your hand, locking your phone and waving off Yamaguchi and Kiyoko when they give you matching looks of interest. The intro commentary starts shortly after, with the teams greeting each other through the net. The game starts promptly at 1:30 PM.
True to his word, Tsukishima Kei makes the winning point at 2:58 PM.
You watch in disbelief as his block sends the ball back over the net, spinning quickly and slamming against the floor between two players on the other team. You’re left stunned in your seat as everyone jumps up, the name on your back screamed across the entire stadium as Frogs fans celebrate yet another win at the hands of their star rookie.
Kiyoko grabs you and hauls you to your feet, and you can’t help the laughter that fills your body as you cheer alongside her.
By the time you find him in the mass of his teammates, Tsukki’s already looking right at you. His teammates all jump around him, shoving and hugging and clapping him on the back.
But all he does is lift his arm, a single finger pointed right at you.
Yamaguchi makes a noise of surprise, and Kiyoko turns to you with a shocked smile.
“You’re not actually…?”
Tsukki crooks his finger twice, beckoning you to him with a satisfied grin.
'Show them who you are.'
Kyoutani sees you next, his smile widening as he cups his hands around his mouth and yells, in that deep baritone that shakes the room-
“ Kiss! ”
Your laughter turns giddy, and you dart out into the aisle to get to the stairs. You take them two at a time, his oversized jersey fluttering behind you as you run down to the court. You hear the whispers and whooping all around you as the fans realize where you are and where you’re headed, but you ignore them in favor of meeting Tsukki halfway across the court.
The smile he gives you is that wild, genuine one that reminds you of your childhood – of playground sand boxes and toy dinosaurs, of excited storytelling and playing volleyball with Akiteru in their backyard.
Of a Tsukishima Kei who would pretend he knew nothing about why the class bully was suddenly sporting a bloody nose after making fun of your body – one who would pretend he couldn’t hear you when you’d say you weren’t hungry, only shoving a spoonful of his lunch in your mouth with that smile that would make you forget why you were crying in the first place.
That’s the Tsukishima Kei that picks you up now and spins you around like you weigh nothing, his arms wrapping around you while you tangle your fingers into his hair and kiss him like your life depends on it. He tastes like salt, and he breathes a laugh past your lips when the crowd starts to follow Kyoutani’s lead, the room erupting in cheers and the thunderous chant of ‘ Kiss! Kiss! Kiss! ’.
“ Congratulations, ” You whisper against his mouth, wrapping your legs around his waist. A shiver runs down your spine when he holds you there, his grip on your hips and thighs possessive and his body flush against yours.
You wonder if maybe he’d seen his life in your smile, too.
“ You gonna greet me like this at every game? ” He asks between kisses, the chanting and cheering becoming nearly overwhelming.
“ Only if you win, ” You laugh, barely able to hear the response he gives you even in your little pocket of solitude.
“ Guess I should start training for Nationals.”
You’d forgotten how easy it is to have fun with him.
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In the Open relationship au at one point maybe Art actually asks her to help him out, he’s been aching so much since the talk with Patrick and seeing reader with Tashi didn’t help at all, so she gives him a hand (literally 🫣) and as he is close to reaching his high she makes him pray to god for forgiveness for that sinful act or else there’s no release 😩
ohhh wait yes
because art's been like this for a couple weeks now. needier than before, even after his composure started to slip. genuinely needy. waking up to his hard-on pressing into you, he's half-asleep and he's still needy, still gagging for it, because he just wants you so, so bad. and eventually, he caves. reasons it away to himself, thinks that it'll be alright if it's just your hand, that much he and his god can forgive him of.
you play off your immediate excitement. act concerned - is he sure? you don't want to take advantage of him, is he sure he really wants this? - and when he finally "persuades" you that yes, this is what he wants, you finally get to see his cock for the first time.
and it's pretty, a nice girth, long and very quickly going red at the tip. you were right, you think, he does flush all over. and you kneel in front of him, tell him he needs to spit on your hand so you can stroke him.
"you want me to... spit on you?"
"just on my hand, artie, right here."
he won't admit he enjoyed it, likes the idea of you so sweet and pliant he could spit on you and you'd take it - want it. but you feel his cock throb nonetheless.
he doesn't last very long, but you don't expect him to. you're on your knees, revert, beautiful, and he thinks for a moment about how much like prayer this is, how much like your god this would make him. it's a sinful, prideful thought, and he pushes it away in favour of bucking up into the warm, slick grip of your hand. he's never realised how wet things could be before, his cock rapidly leaking precum, leading to a mess of wet shlick, shlick sounds as you fuck him with your fist.
"fuck, fuck, oh god, baby, 'm close," he whines, "please--"
"don't ask me," you say, slowing your hand, drawing it out. "ask him."
you jerk your head up to the ceiling. he stares at you, eyes wide, cheeks flush, pupils blown, cock throbbing in your hand. even his balls twitch, as if to win your sympathies.
"you're being so bad, after all," you continue in a low voice, giving him a rough stroke, root to tip. your thumb swipes over his slit and he whines. "you should ask for a bit of forgiveness. tell him you're sorry, and ill let you cum."
like art isnt sorry every damn day. like he isn't plagued by sin every time he looks at you. he doesn't have to try to come up with the right words.
"f-forgive me, heav-- ah -- heavenly f-father," he chokes. "for i ha-ah-ve sin-sinned."
you resume your torturously slow hand job. all the breath leaves arts lungs in a single, shaking breath.
"i- i've had lustful feelings and--" his voice breaks. "god, oh, god-- ive been bad, ive been so bad, im so sorry, 'm sorry, im sorry, oh god, please, please, 'm sorry--"
it's like his brain is broken. he knows the words, but his mouth can't form them. he knows this prayer back to front. this very confession. but his tongue is tied, everything lost somewhere on the path from his head to his lips. it's exactly what you were looking for.
"that's a good boy. cum for me, artie."
and he does. all over your hand. his stomach. it's sort of beautiful. take that, you think vindictively. i made him like this. he's mine, now. im his fucking god.
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MTMTE x gn reader
『 rodimus ,, ultra magnus ,, chromedome ,, rewind ,, megatron ,, whirl ,, tailgate ,, swerve ,, cyclonus ,, first aid ,, ratchet ,, drift ,, gender neutral reader 』
-> christmas on the lost light
— fluff ,, sfw ,, crack
— sorry i havent been uploading as much 😭💔 ive been busy with work and school ,, but im on christmas break so hopefully ill be able to get through the few requests i have sitting in my inbox rn and reopen requests :(( ima try to start uploading more now as much as i can ❤️ heres a little something for christmas though ! hope you all enjoy christmas this year <3
• it was natural for the bots aboard to be interested in human customs ,, having lived in a war most their life . death and violence were something they were quite used to experiencing ,, never really having the time to experience anything outside of the horrors of war itself .
• swerve was one of the few main bots that pestered you often about human holidays . cybertronians didn't celebrate much ,, unless they were a group of autobots who just gave some decepticons a what-for .
• then again ,, swerve usually asked many questions regarding things on earth and what humans do . sometimes you humored him ,, sometimes you told little lies ,, like if you clapped three times in a mall it would be a sign that a tiger was loose . it was quite fun to put silly nonsense in that processor of his at times .
• though when it came to christmas he would not leave you alone . whether you celebrated it or not ,, you still explained the custom in general to him . how old saint nicholas would mosey on down the chimney ,, eat the cookies and drink the milk left out for him ,, and leave presents under the tree lit well and adorned with ornaments .
• you even pulled up the santa tracker for swerve ,, showing him where santa would go and be ,, how on christmas eve he would be flying around with his reindeer and leave presents
• hearing all of this intrigued chromedome and rewind ,, as well as tailgate and whirl . cyclonus didn't understand the hype and belief of having an old random man leave gifts in your house and eat your food even if left out specifically him . tailgate was thrilled though ,, a funny little old man leaving him gifts seemed so heavenly to him . chromedome and rewind ,, however ,, had different opinions . rewind was interested in this human holiday ,, whilst chromedome shared the same opinion as cyclonus . how were you sure this 'santa' guy wasnt gonna rob you ? and when you were sleeping nonetheless .
• rodimus already knew of this tradition ,, as did ratchet and ultra magnus . rodimus was quite ecstatic at the idea of having a christmas party ,, watching christmas movies and sipping on energon . maybe he could even have you sit on his lap ,, all cozy in those soft blankets and sippin on your own mug of hot chocolate .
• ratchet couldnt care less ,, grumbling something about how 'you humans and your holidays and customs' . though he definitely didnt deny the offer of going to this christmas party ,, it was nice to spend some time that didn't involve life threatening situations for once .
• ultra magnus ,, on the other hand ,, was quite picky about how the christmas party should be set up . he even tried to ban home alone ,, saying he didnt want rodimus to get any ideas from the traps in the movie . the last thing he needed was to end up in one the next day . though ,, the many outweigh the few ,, and so home alone was allowed in the movie marathon .
• now when you told him about the grinch ,, he wasnt sure if you were mocking him by saying it was an actual movie or if he should be concerned for what this dr.seuss guy was drawing . i mean ,, have you seen how hairy the grinch is ? or how the whos in whoville are shaped ? pointy noses and all ,, it was quite new to magnus .
• megatron ,, who overheard everything ,, already knew he wasnt going to be wanted at the party . it made sense ,, his past and everything he's done to earth and its people . though when you asked him to come ,, that you personally wanted him there ,, he swore he felt his spark stop for a second . he only gave a nod ,, whilst ravage bickered to him that night in his habsuite .
• whirl ,, to say the least ,, was prepared to fight santa . he was watching the santa tracker ,, waiting for the jolly fellow to pop up so whirl could fly down and bring out the big guns ( that brainstorm recently made ,, not yet tested out or put through a test trial so lord knows what may go wrong) . magnus almost had to throw him in the brig if he couldnt contain his sudden rage and fury for the old man .
• first aid was somewhat interested ,, never having celebrated a holiday before . it would be nice ,, getting together and doing nothing but watching movies all day . he hadnt seen movies from earth that much either ,, besides a few fast n furious ones here and there . needless to say ,, he was somewhat concerned for humans need to trash cars . he cringed a little on the inside ,, watching those perfectly good cars blow up . it was like a horror movie but for cybertronians .
• during the movie marathon ,, whirl tried to sneak violent night and black christmas in ,, saying they were also christmas movies and that they should watch them . magnus ended up throwing them out ,, saying no one really felt like seeing dying people during this one time of peace .
• drift enjoyed the nightmare before christmas ,, the claymation alone was enough to captivate him . then the designs of the characters ,, the music and songs ,, even jack's childlike wonder for christmas matched his own (in a few ways) . during that movie you sat with him ,, sharing a few facts about the movie itself . how long it took to make and how hard it is to do claymation movies .
• during the polar express you stayed with rewind and chromedome ,, snuggling in between the two and sippin on your hot chocolate . rewind enjoyed watching the train on the ice whilst chromedome puffed about how he coulda easily done that himself and saved everyone . you only rolled your eyes ,, muttering out a sure as you fought back a smile .
• during a break in between the movies you noticed megatron ,, standing awkwardly in the corner with his own cube of fools energon in servo . you smiled at the bot ,, walking up to him and having a small conversation with him . you didnt honestly think he’d show up ,, but youre glad he did . he let you sit with him during one of the movies ,, bonding well with the giant bot .
• he was quite warm ,, heat coming from off his body as you huddled close to him . he tucked his servo around you ,, worried you may fall off . for a few moments during the movie you swore you saw him smile at some of the corniest parts ,, or chuckle softly at some of the dumbest jokes .
• you took turns ,, switching between bots during different movies . you would sit in their laps ,, explain little things you liked about the movie playing and share a few things of your own childhood during this time of the year .
• it was nice ,, to say the least . having time to the bots ,, doing things that reminded you of home . it wasnt the same ,, but it was the thought that counted . spending time with them peacefully was more than enough for you ,, and definitely more than you could ask for this christmas .
#transformers x reader#x reader#x gender neutral reader#megatron x reader#🎇.mtmte#mtmte x reader#rodimus x reader#🎇.swerve#🎇.rodimus#🎇.rewind#🎇.megatron#🎇.tailgate#🎇.cyclonus#🎇.chromedome#🎇.ultra magnus#🎇.first aid#🎇.ratchet#ratchet x reader#first aid x reader#drift x reader#🎇.drift#rewind x reader#chromedome x reader#tailgate x reader#cyclonus x reader#swerve x reader
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The Mistakes That Have Been Made
Part 2.5 (bonus for the people. I think you guys need some good soup, from moi <3)
Warnings!: Angst, angst, and more angst. Reader will be MAD sad for most of this. Poorly-practiced, unhealthy polyamory. Reader will experience a LOT of gender and body dysphoria over the course of this (though I will do my best to keep it gender-neutral throughout, bear with me), but there WILL be comfort over that.
The team dynamics of the 141 have always been messy, ugly things, but this is ugly. You wouldn't wish it on anyone, really.
When you'd walked back to your own room, you'd heard Soap railing the daylights out of Gaz, cussing your name beneath his breath as the other sergeant groaned, high and throaty.
As awful as this feels, at least he's not doing that to you.
Johnny's always been a bit of a... rough bed partner, you know that, he's so eager to get into the heat of it that he never gives himself the time to warm up or cool down. Tends to be so enthusiastic that he doesn't offer much aftercare before he falls asleep, either.
Still, walking past Gaz's room brings back memories of that nasty, sick feeling that follows every intimate experience you've ever had.
It's the feeling that your body is somehow wrong, too tight in some parts and too loose in others, like the very existence of your form is a contradiction that just can't stand a second longer.
The way you hold your laptop shifts, pressing the metal into your chest to somehow remedy this ill. How? You're not sure. It doesn't work very well.
You try to shake it off as you open your door and sit on your bed, but the moans still breach your walls.
God, since when did Gaz sound like that? It feels like it's choking the air out of the room.
You put your best effort toward minding your own business, but you felt like you were losing your mind a half-hour into that endeavor, and instead thumped your fist on the wall, loud enough to send the message. Learning how to sign and trying to ignore... that was simply not a feasible task.
The moaning and creaking stops shortly after, and the sigh you heave is like no others, though you know damn well those two will definitely be pissy with you tomorrow.
Finally.
Plastic buzzing against the "wood" of your nightstand (shitty plywood painted white, as is standard issue) draws your focus away from that, if only for a second.
Heyhey! Do u wanna train together tmrw?? I think you'd do good if you took it easy w/me 😊 <33
The rubber and plastic of your case isn't all that comfortable in your hands, but you hold the magical little glass box in your hands anyway, peering down at the screen before chuckling to yourself.
Why should I?
Is your reply. It doesn't strike you that it might have been a bit on the nose, or that Gary might have read it differently, until the text bubble appears and disappears several times in a row, and you re-read it.
Oh no, you sound like an absolute asshole.
Sorry. I do want to, I just wanted to tease.
He's typing for another few seconds, before the bubble disappears one more time, and it starts to make you panic. More than you want to be panicking over him.
Don't be mad please, I'm sorry. I want to train with you.
How the mighty have fallen.
Look at you, desperately prostrating yourself before a rookie because you're absolutely moronic, praying that he'll offer you a reply. Whatever happened to four times the love?
Fuck. Don't think about that.
im not mad, ur fine just thought you might be a little grouchy from the meds or smth, wasnt sure if i should ask
You breathe a real sigh of relief at the returned messages, already more than tired by the day, but slightly soothed as you look down at the blue light of the screen, and send your last message of the day.
I'll see you at 0630. Goodnight.
A little red heart appears over your message, in the top left corner of the rounded bubble.
You plug in your phone and try to ignore how something in your chest squeezes at being deemed worthy of making plans more than two hours in advance.
It's a shockingly new thing, but goodness does it feel good, even if it brings on a sting of a more somber feeling.
Gaz and Soap sure as fuck didn't do this. Ghost either. You never expected Price to do that for you in the first place. Did they just... not think you were enough to make plans for? Was this pity?
You try to shake off the feeling as you bunch your blankets around your body, allowing your tired form to sink into the mattress and rest. The morning will clear your thoughts.
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#tf 141 x reader#x reader#kyle gaz garrick#kyle gaz garrick x reader#angst#simon ghost riley#simon riley x reader#x gn reader#john soap mactavish#john soap mctavish x reader#john price#price x reader#gary roach sanderson#gary roach sanderson x reader#appendicitis#poorly practiced polyamory#sad
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dess-ember day 31/31
very long thoughts below the read more!
hi yall
woo-hoo, ive finished another month of dess-ember!! it really has been fun, if very time consuming, but ive made many pieces over this month ive loved and had a great time sharing them all with yalls 😄😄😄
but anyways, lets get to the final entry! its a bit of an unusual one :D
its some pixel art!! i have only done 2 other pixel things this month (i originally wanted to do more, but i am very slow at it 😔), so i felt like ending with it wasnt a bad way to go!
i took dess, noelle, berdly, kris, ralsei, and susie and made some different sprites of them, which were taking the way i draw them and making them into sprite version, and also me making omori style versions as well
i had a couple different versions of the art, layed out in different ways, but stinky tumblr only lets me have 10 images. unfortunate 😔.
but anyways, now weve got the main part, each individual character! you can skip past this if you dont want to hear my thoughts i had while doing the individual drawings, its kinda alot :/
i put them all in a format like this, hopefully it isnt confusing!
we can go in order of how i have them in the very first image, so we can start with kris :D
kris was a very fun one to do, they were actually the second one i made, and them turning out so well is what led me to making even more. i feel like im pretty much entirety happy with them, the omori style turned out cute, and the deltarune style isnt half bad either! i did forget to give them bangs though, like i normally give them in my art, but i was too much of a bum to go back and fix it after i finished :|. i feel like they translated very well ❤️
next would be ralsei, but im doing him last actually, because he has the most to talk about 😤😤
now weve got susie! her hair in her canon form was tricky to translate into the omori style, but i think it was worth it, cause it turned out well! and i think her canon dark world omori sprite might be my favorite i made, her outfit turned out great!! im not as fond of my versions of her design, they didnt translate that well into sprites, but it could be worse lol. her face was a bit difficult to do, since the omori head shape is meant for a human, but i think she turned out good regardless 💜
next is berdly, and im so sorry for him, he turned out roughhh. if i thought someone like susie, with her head, was hard to translate into the omori style, it was nothing compared to trying to turn berdly into it. with his beak and his head feathers and wings and his legs... yeah, it was not a fun time 😔. i tried though, and i dont think its entirely bad! the legs are probably the worst part, they are kinda hard to see, but the rest of it came together... kinda. dont get me started on turning my version of him into a sprite though, i dont wanna talk about it 😫. sorry berdly, if i ever sprite you again ill make it up to you 🩵
next is noelle! she was the first i did, and i feel like she turned out so cute 🥰🥰🥰. her dark world, my version, deltarune style sprite might be my second favorite one i made, i think it actually translated well to sprite art. her fur is a bit rough, gradiants are tough in pixel art, but i dont think its that bad overall. but yeah, im pretty happy with her 🤎
penultimatly, weve got dess! gotta have her, its dess-ember after all!! hers was hard to do, trying to take my own design and alter it to make it more canon (mostly, i just simplified some things, but i dont think it looks enough like a canon sprite :( ill keep trying with it), but i think she turned out cute as well! im not entirely happy with it though, as i said, i might go back to fix up the deltarune styled ones at some point 💚
lastly, weve got ralsei. ohhh ralsei, how cute you are, but how difficult you were 😵💫😵💫😵💫. to start off with, i had a goal in mind for the deltarune style sprites. normally, when you look at the canon ralsei sprites, you might notice they look a bit different. obviously theres the hat, and the fur color, but its more than that.
theres so many differences, and yet my goal was to make the sprites lose all those differences, and be more consistent with each other. i didnt think it would be too bad, but it was a rough time. i made his hatless version easily, and i was like, oh, ill just add a hat, change his color, itll be easy!! ...it was not easy 😶🌫️. i did that and he looked so wrong, it barely even looked like hat ralsei at all 😖.
i mean, that doesnt look right, right?? so i had to keep editing, and changing both versions, trying to make them better. i spent so much longer on him than anyone else, but at the end, i think it was worth it! i feel like he ended up adorable, but boy was it work 😂
the omori sprites of his were pretty easy though, once i had all the deltarune sprites down i just omori-fied them, took barely any time. i did make his outline purple though, like the headspace denizens, since hes a darkner 🩷
but thats it for that! this is where youd wanna skip if you didnt wanna read all that lol. now for me to yap about this month, and dess!
i feel like this was a pretty productive dess-ember!! i definitely ramped up my art from last year, trying to do as few small drawings as possible. was that a mistake? maybe lol. it was certainly difficult, and led to pretty much every drawing being late because most of them took like 8 hours or so, but i suppose a couple hours late doesnt affect much, and i still did all 31 entries!
and id say while it was a struggle, it was a good thing i did it! i enjoyed my time drawing, and sharing all my art with yalls is always a fun time for me ^^ and i really do like drawing dess, i think i made a pretty good design for her all those years ago (like 2) 😊
there is the question though, of 'what about next year? will you do this again??' and to that i say... i dont actually know haha. i would want to, even if im busy i could always do a smaller one, but the real thing that could affect it is that, in 2025 we are getting more deltarune!!! im more excited than i could ever say, but if we see dess in canon, then i dont know if ill do another dess-ember. there would be my design vs canon design, which would be strange to reconcile with, and i imagine someone would probably do an official month for her of art prompts.
but thats all if she even appears. if she doesnt, well, expect me back next december to do this! if she does, ill have to think about it, so we will see then ^^
anyways, ive had a good month doing this! it may be a bit before i post new art, to give myself a break, but ill be back 😄
bye yall, and happy new year 2025!!! 🥳🥳🥳
#art#my art#digital art#deltarune#noelle holiday#deltarune noelle#dess holiday#deltarune dess#december holiday#deltarune december#berdly#deltarune berdly#deltarune kris#kris dreemurr#deltarune susie#susie#ralsei#deltarune ralsei#dess-ember#dess-ember day 31#pixel art#omori
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buster and eddie headcanons
still struggling to draw and i feel really lazy but i have to say. buster and eddie together, just the concept alone, has me giggling and kicking my legs. theyre so silly. and yes i DO think theyre boyfriends. sorry if this is hard to read its late and im not giving much attention to legibility rn. big walls of text sorryguys - i kinda flipflop between if they met in very late high school or during college because buster says to nana "we met at eddie's graduation". i think it fits better canonically if buster was already maybe halfway through/almost done with his courses and then met a freshman eddie. buster graduated first, then eddie followed. - eddie did not take college seriously at all. guy failed everything. but he locked in the last year, because from the Eddie's Life Coach short film he's shown to know how to get his act together – even if it means immediately forgetting it afterwards - eddie majored in sound design. he wanted to make sound effects for video games - these guys are HUGE morons. oh my god. dumb and dumber over here. average intelligence decreases by 20% whenever they walked into a room - buster was a lot more hyperactive and scattered back then but has mellowed out with age and got his adhd medicated - eddie comes from a spanish-speaking family. he understands spanish but can't speak a word (me with afrikaans lol) - no one at the theatre really knows who eddie is beside his name, the fact that he helps out from time to time, and that he sometimes brings in mcdonalds and coffee for mr moon - eddie smokes pot. not as much now but always used to back then - did he share with buster? obviously - buster CANNOT cook. his father always made the food when he was alive, or miss crawley would make him things, or he'd just buy microwavable stuff you slap in for a few minutes and its ready to eat. do not trust this man around a stove - the kitchen in his loft apartment is seldom used because he eats microwavable lasagna or something every single day - one time he tried making something and set the place on fire - also i think buster's dad's name is David because the Dave and Buster's pun cracks me up n makes me hysterical - as a housewarming gift, eddie gave buster his old xbox. it still works fine but he has a newer one and doesnt want the old one collecting dust. well it collects dust anyway because buster has not played any. hes too busy - buster cant see far away. hes always squinting and getting headaches. refuses to get glasses because 'theyre such a hassle' and opts for contact lenses - eddie has given buster his own keys to the pool house because he visits so often - eddie's parents don't like buster so much. the constant mooching and borrowing money (which he still hasnt paid back btw) doesnt leave a good impression. buster doesnt mind and hops the fence when they lock him out
its 3am ill write more if i think of them. and maybe draw soon. sob sob
#sing#sing movie#buster moon#eddie noodleman#noodlemoon#sing 2#theyre so stupid i want them dead#let me hear YOUR headcanons teehee#my headcanons#art block raaagh#i can draw other characters but i cant draw buster beloved :( tomfoolery
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HELLO MOD SOUDA, IT IS I, TO MAKE AN ASK AGAIN.
tbh this is soooo personal bc this is something I've been thinking on for a loooong time but intensified this year
so here I am to ask for hcs.
oh yeah the era is back. I said never again but I love the way you write him so idc!!!
Teruteru Hanamura × S/O who has to take care of their family ( bonus points if they have a mother who is Ill and if they're overworked )
( I legit just took a day to cry yesterday cause of the stress and I have such a bad habit of hiding my feelings that I cried all night and couldn't actually listen to any of my classes 😭😭 NOW I HAD TO WRITE EVERYTHING FROM MY LAST LECTURE TODAY UGGHH)
ANYWAYS IM GONNA DRAW MORE FOR THE LAST WRITING YOU DID SO I CAN POST IT CUTELY ON HERE 🥰
KISSES MUAH
— 🐭🌙 ( oh my god that was such a long message- 💀 )
Teruteru Hanamura with an overworked S/O who has to take care of their family
mouse lovie welcome back omfg ANDMAKE SURE YOU HAVE TIME FOR SCHOOL I LOVE YOU YOU GOT THIS LOVIE
-Mod Souda
❤ He understands fully. He knows all the right things to say when you open up about it.
❤ He is a talker but when it comes to serious situations, especially with his lover, he will sit his fruity ass down and listen. He doesn't need to give his two cents or general advice, he will simply just listen if that's all that you do.
❤ He's a bit too obtuse to say the exact words "What do you need?".
❤ Your family is HIS family now. Period. And beyond how much time being a Hopes Peak alumni can take, he's going to spend his spare time trying to get to know those important to you so he can see just where in your life he can fit as another person you can love.
❤ He is super homebody he'll be there if you need him, and ofc, he shows his love for food, so expect a good meal for you and your family.
❤ Getting a hug from his mom could make your day too. She understands the stress a child can go through. Her hands are warm they wrap around your head, holding you tight.
❤ Mans is going to start making the bed to have things be less stressful for you. Fluffing the pillows and everything. Will make a suggestive joke about it, duh, but it's his way of trying to be sweet. Acts of service.
❤ Fluffed pillows, a full fridge, and a surprisingly clean bathroom.
❤ "Sugar, I know you've been working real hard, I want you to know that I uhh... I appreciate the things you're doing." Fidgeting with this fingers, showing a tenderness as if you were the one helping him.
❤ You two still have the small moments where it feels like all the stress in the world goes away. The two of you sing together in the kitchen, you fall asleep against him while watching movies, he will give you roses and flatter you beyond comprehension. And when the weight of the world comes back, he'll still be there.
❤ Gonna add this too but you know he got hella money from having attended Hopes Peak just saying.
❤ He puts a lot of effort into making sure your family likes him and is comfortable around him. He doesn't want to add any distaste or any feeling such.
❤ He got that extra experience in taking care of ill family members. Will just softly drop tidbits of his experiences while also trying not to make the mood darker. In between his often 'aloof' sense of humor comes small sentences of something more.
❤ I am so sorry but I can't get out of my head Teruteru greeting your mom like "hey mama" all southern like a son from Louisianna.
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