#im so upset because i really loved the story but WHY DID IT TURN INTO RACE MOTIVATED WAR

[yoonyia]

"Marry me."

"James you're far too old for me."

"We're the same age. Don't you dare lie to me"

"I'm married, and somehow I love him too. You're asking for far too much James."

"I can wait 6 years, he's gonna have to die then anyways,"

"James I'm not going to fall back in love because you shower me with gifts and information make grand romantic gestures to take me across the galaxy so we can live forever middle aged, I'm gonna save the last few years I have with my husband then spend the rest of my life time begging for forgiveness to my son, do you understand me James? I'm a guilty old man who's grief would kill him if he went with you."

"You're no old man, you're younger then me. 49 is far from old."

"63 isn't far."

"Oh don't call me old."

"I'm not calling you old I'm saying you had a chance to live a life despite flying yourself into space and living in a false grandeur of immortality. You achieved your dream, I left behind the only people that I could ever love and they love me back out of drunken self pity and when I came back I knew no one. I threw away my life and now my own son has more lines on his face given to him as gifts from time when I should be dying next to the love of my life. I have a life I want to live, grow old, and die in. I have no want to live so long we become ancient legends."

"Im giving you the chance to grow old and die with me. I'll be the new love of your life. We can make a life from the one I crave and the one you lost."

"You were my old love of my life, and my heart is too ill to do anything but grieve."

"Then let me give you time to heal, leave behind everyone and everything and rid your heart of all that worry."

"How is that an attractive offer to you, how are you looking me in the eyes and telling me the thing I punished myself for years on end is something I should yearn for and show it to me as a relief?"

"It's lonely being alone forever. Do it for me, Ari, Do it for your friend."

"It'll be lonely even if you take a hundred people."

"I can wait 2 decades for you."

"I hope I'm dead by then."

"I hope we never die."

"I'm sorry for your loss already."

[luvvixu]

mind over matter pt. 4

synopsis: witness how your marriage was bound to fall apart with you on the front seat and your husband gojo had missed the show—now, he gotta figure out the story on his own.

content: arrange marriage au, angst, husband!gojo, mean!gojo, mention of blood, strong languages, some unsettling scenarios, emotional trauma, read at your own risk

a/n: ok, im such a bad author now huhu, i always broke my promises about updating the new chapter :((( should've just wrote in advance but i'm afraid i don't have that enough free time oqsjjanswjaj anyways, here's the anticipated chapter!! THANK YOU FOR Y'ALL PATIENCE <3 MWUHEHEHHEEHHE

previous / masterlist / next

the next day comes and you've got yourself some visitors. megumi, yuuji, nobara, maki, and inumaki was in your room and they were all seated around you as you talk.

panda and your two third years were not around at the moment because this is a non-sorcerer hospital and people would freak out to see a big ‘talking’ panda. during your two third years, they were out of town and were on a mission but they still text you to get well and even send you some fresh flowers.

“wait, i still can't believe that he's your husband.” nobara couldn't explain his shock at the revelation. out of all, she didn't think that her goofy teacher was someone's husband.

you chuckled at her reactions as you turned your gaze on megumi, who's still his mouth hanging. “megumi, i thought you're getting a hint?” you tease the boy. although it was true, you actually thought he already had an idea because you've known him for almost his entire life and even once lived with you as a kid.

“no…” was only his answer.

“so, gojo-sensei was the one you're talking about when you said that he was a busy man. most of his job requires being out of town. but he never fails to shower you with love and he is making sure that you two would still communicate despite his busy schedule?” your eyes widened when yuuji literally just said what you had said from before, word-by-word!

“i—i supposed he is.” everyone in the room sweat dropped at your answer.

what do you mean you supposed?!

“y/n-sensei, is it okay if we ask your baby?” maki chooses the gentlest approach because she heard that post-pregnancy can make the mother quite crikey, sensitive, and is prone to depression. but to her relief, you respond to her warmly.

“oh, the baby is being treated since they're premature. i really can't wait to meet them once i get better. but right now, shoko was the only one who had seen my baby.” you smiled softly at the thought of your baby.

“gojo-sensei still hadn't seen the baby?” maki’s eyes went wide.

you nodded. “yeah, he said we should go together so i must heal quickly for that to happen.”

the door suddenly opened and it revealed your husband with food in his hand. you smiled at the packages not because you're hungry, but because you had finally persuaded satoru to go out and leave you even for just a few minutes.

how did you do it? well, you just give him an earful after what he did yesterday night and he's like;

“i don't know how you did it but you should've just gone to the convenience store or the hospital canteen just for an oatmeal and eggs. and look, i'm not upset over the fact that you just had the ‘very easy to get’ food delivered on this doorstep. what concerns me is you seem not to trust me very well to handle myself— well in fact i've been doing it since i was a kid and blah, blah, blah, blah…” it was your turn to yap but a little longer than he did. you even probably bought up some of his minor mistakes like not taking out the trash on random sunday night.

and he was like, “i'm sorry. i won’t do it again ( •̯́ ^ •̯̀)”

“y'all done backstabbing me?” satoru teasingly smiled at you all.

“oh, we're just getting started. so why don't you take a seat and hear us out?” you patted the empty space of your bed beside you.

satoru playfully huffed and gave the foods to his students and let them distribute it themselves. sitting beside you, he gave you the separate plastic with food and helped you feed yourself. the two of you had your moment with you telling satoru to just let you be and stop feeding you like a kid, but satoru was like nuh uh—and it goes on and on.

meanwhile, the students watch you two with surprise in their eyes. they still couldn't digest the fact that you two had managed to hide your marriage for like five years or so. and out of all spouses out there, they couldn't believe their eyes that you married a guy that is a total opposite of you.

“i still cannot really believe that you're married and have a baddie wife.” nobara almost never tears her gaze towards you two.

“yeah, much more is that they look so in love!” yuuji agrees to what nobara said as his words made you two stop bickering instantly.

like a cold water being poured, you two were suddenly experiencing a reality check that this so-called in love was very far from the two of you actually is. coughing slightly to hide his awkwardness and nervousness, he just let himself chuckle. while you? you're an expert at this, you maintain a smiley expression and wordlessly (and also forcefully) agrees to what the boy said.

“oh my, do we?” putting a hand on your cheek, you smiled with your eyes closed. your act looks so legit but satoru has seen this multiple side—he knew this facade was all fake.

maki suddenly puts herself into attention by calling your name. “anyway y/n-sensei, i've noticed you two don't have a ring—” before she could even finish her sentence, you already beat her to it.

“that's because the two of us, mostly him, are constantly fighting curses and both involve using our hands when we use our techniques. it would be risky to wear it and we're scared that we might get it lost or damaged.” you explain meticulously.

you watch the students agree to your explanation, while satoru is looking at you with meaning. you stared back at him too, hoping that he would get your telepathic message.

“alright guys, your y/n-sensei needs to rest now. we'll just see you guys soon or you can all just drop by tomorrow after your training.” satoru called everyone's attention by clapping his hands then started to playfully shoo the students.

you watch them pack their things and wave you a happy goodbye, in which you return their enthusiasm as well. when they all left, you let out a sigh and started to gently lie your body on the bed. satoru, who was done cleaning just now, sit at the end of your bed and carefully massage your legs.

“did you have fun with them?” you just lazily hum at his question and proceed to rest your eyes.

“i…i'm surprised you managed to convince them about our marriage.” satoru continued quietly.

opening one of your eyes and looking at him, you said, “of course, i've been doing it to a lot of people for the past five years.”

that alone made him shut up.

satoru looked down to his hands, which were still busy massaging your legs. you've noticed that his eyes were casted down and his behavior was somewhat familiar to you, he's feeling something that is related to guilt and regret.

clicking your tongue, you're in no mood to deal with his behavior today. so to find a solution to this problem, you just put yourself to sleep and let all of this just go on without a single care.

it has been two days and you're getting better day by day. today was probably the bestest day so far because you're about to finally see your own baby!

“calm down, mama. do you want your stitches to open again?” shoko holds your knees to stop it from shaking anxiously as you were currently sitting just right outside the neonatal intensive care unit (nicu) where your baby was.

you understand that the doctors need to prepare the room first before you all come in, but you wished that they speed it up.

“but sho, i'm finally seeing my baby!” you squeal at your friend who just ruffles your hair and tells you to be patient—in which you definitely can't.

meanwhile, satoru, who was standing beside you while you and shoko were sitting together, has been eyeing you since this whole waiting. he understands that you're excited about seeing the baby because he is too, he is excited. but he couldn't help but to feel a sensation that you would rather share your excitement with others than him.

he knows that he sounds ridiculous and undeserving to say that in the first place after what he did to put you through, but he still couldn't help it and he wouldn't even dare to say it to you.

the door of the nicu just opened and it revealed the doctor who was wearing protective gear to keep bacterias and viruses from entering the room and harm the baby. before he lets you all in, he first instructs you all to change the same gear as him and then proceeds to give you all some explanation in which you actively listen and take notes.

and after that, he finally lets you go inside.

the moment your eyes traveled on a crib, you saw your child laying down there with some breathing apparatus that is connected to their little body. you could feel your eyes swell with hot tears as you inch yourself towards the bundle of joy who's their crib was also protected with glass and only small holes on both sides were there.

satoru and shoko watched you with pure warmth at your sight—it was a nice scene of mother's love. finally, a tear escapes your eyes the moment you get a whole view of your child.

“isn't he pretty?” shoko said beside you, someone who you didn't notice had come near you.

you gasp, “he? m-my baby is a boy?” your cries go even harder, but it was just pure happiness. you couldn't bring yourself to tear your gaze away from your child even though he looks fragile for being premature but you love him dearly.

“can i touch him?” you look at the doctor who assisted you earlier without caring that you might look like a crying mess. you're far more thrilled to be with your child than to be pretty at this moment.

the doctor smiled at you and he agreed. he pointed out the small hole on the side, telling you to stick your hands out to feel your baby. you do what he said with your shaky hands, and when your fingertips touch his warm skin—you feel like you could die from the burst of euphoria.

“my b-baby, my baby is n-now here!” you really can't hold your emotions back as you keep on passing your fingers through your baby's arm until it reaches his closed hands where you slightly and gently open it for him to grab index finger. and when he does, your smile becomes even wider.

“hi baby~ this is me, your mommy. it's so nice to finally see you.” you whispered softly, hoping that despite the glass, he could hear your words.

this is the bestest day of your life. your baby was here and that's all you need.

the scene continues to unfold with you still getting emotional and shoko was just watching you with a smile on her face. while satoru, the father of the child, the husband of the mother, was a little distant but he could still see the baby. he was all quiet and couldn't bring himself to utter a word but he's not speechless.

his eyes behind those glasses were trailed on the child, but most of his gazes were on you. satoru watches you become all smiley—this is probably the happiest smile he had seen on your lips for the past years of your marriage.

and he would absolutely never forgive himself if he breaks it—but he already did.

shoko notices his odd behavior and promptly leaves your side for a while (but you're busy having a baby talk with your baby to notice her leaving) to go talk to him.

“what? you're just gonna stand there and watch y/n?” yup. still the same as before, hostile towards the man. satoru let out a sigh and didn't give her attention. instead, he walked towards y/n and just focused on his family.

“you’re so tiny!” you continue to cooed at your son who keeps on moving slightly which is a good sign that your son is responsive and fighting. you also noticed that satoru was now right beside you and is looking at your son too with adoration tinted in his eyes.

“i don't think i could let myself be away from him anymore.” you said. your cheeks were now hurting from constant smiling but you don't mind.

satoru only looks at you briefly because his attention was now on his son, fully. “hello, it was nice finally meeting you.” his eyes trailed on his own flesh and blood with the most care of all.

on the other hand, you're not dumb to not notice that satoru was acting hesitant towards this scene and you knew what his reason was. you think that satoru thinks that he was undeserving to be here, and you're correct about his assumption.

but as a woman who grew up with an experience of being inside a shattered family, you absolutely would not want that to happen to your own child. and as much as you would also like to satoru be away at least for now because you're still that sensitive about what he had said during those conversations in the clinic and hallway, you respect his role as a father.

you'd give him a chance to prove his worth as a father to your child, but he's far worse to have a chance to prove his worth as a husband to you. if he messes this up real bad and without any proper explanation, this will be all over—satoru would no longer have you and your child as his own family.

“stick your hand on his hole, that way you could feel him.” you guided his hand towards the hole that you had said before and watched his hands turn shakey as he reached for the baby.

once satoru had finally experienced a skin-to-skin touch with his baby, he wanted to cry so badly but he didn't allow himself to, at least not yet. he felt like this was one of the best moments in his existence.

satoru would like to punch himself for questioning the baby for his plans as he seemingly thinks it would affect him. but just when he look and touch his baby, all of his recollection about the mixed emotions he felt when the baby is on the board has suddenly vanished and it was replaced with gratefulness and adoration for both of you.

it was like a full 360 degrees turn was done after the early birth of his first born. plus, he had seen you be ever so happy that you are with him. and deep inside him, satoru deniably hopes that this kid, this child, can at least help him save this marriage that was destined to fail and doomed.

because he now finally realizes that you're slowly wrapping him around your tiny fingers.

your tears had made him be a better person, your recent experience had made him behave. it almost cost you and your baby's wife just for him to realize the importance of your five years of marriage, and he's planning to tell you that soon.

“have you finally decided what name we should give him?” shoko asked you and she didn't fail to see your eyes sparkle at the mention of name.

ah yes, baby names.

that was something that a mother and father should decide together because it comes very crucial because the name that your baby will get is a symbol of you two's relationship. but the thing is, you and your husband hadn't talked about a single thing or just anything related to this matter.

that's probably why you're still embarrassed whenever you think about nanami accidentally seeing you open a website into one of the school's computers about unique baby names with its meaning.

you're four months pregnant at that time and you're spending your free time in a teacher's lounge. you're very invested in your mini research to the point that you didn't notice an old friend peeking at your screen. you actually only notice his presence when you're about to stretch but accidentally bump his torso, and to your surprise, he was there.

and then the rest becomes a story and history. nanami helped you pick baby names for both genders or even unisex until you came out with…

“kazuki. let's name him that.” a soft smile was decorated on your lips as you watched satoru, who's looking at you, plays with the hands of your son.

“kazuki…that's a nice name, y/n.” satoru said happily. however, you can see his disappointment behind those words and you know why. you didn't even invite him to search for your baby's name because why would you?

“does it have any special meaning?” shoko asked you.

you nodded and said, “of course, kazuki means hope of peace—and i really need that.”

taglists: @mistymuii @kalopsia-flaneur @sherryuki-callmeyuki @aish777 @tttttttf @slyhersophia @rirk-ke @labelt-san @shinruo @testrella @sad-darksoul @kurookinnie @mountvesuvu @chwesuh-imnida @cole-silas @elernity @maddie-jayne @yozora7154 @kawaiivillainess98 @forourpoets @aishies-stuff @numblytemporary @souyasplushie @catarinemirandax @aerithsthingss @h1gh4ru @ssetsuka @jskodn @khoiyyu @the2ndl @vebbiewuzhere @kouyoumarryme @dreamyescapesfromreality @local-mr-frog @haesify @blkmystery @bleppt @leavem3al0n3 @arminloverlol @megumisthirdog @shirabane @sheismaryy @tragicgirl444 @vampsins @miizuzu @kurobo @anxious-chick @p1nkliquor @mshitachin @chxrv @lolsasuke @username23345 @netyxms @lvstru @roscpctals99 @buttermilktea11 @berenevenstarzetaestelar @jiupark @hotsauce247 @veryverysadauthor @skepticalleo @opentheyoor01 @slowlyshycomputer @babybarbs12 @thickemadame @yaninnaacu @foggypostshark

[part 5 will be just there right around the corner — ©luvvixu2024]

[kamii-2]

Aubrey Griffen smut where fem reader is out at a bar with her and the team and Aubrey gets all jealous at the fact that her girlfriend is too busy dancing with Azzi and azzi knows and does it all to piss Aubrey off so Aubrey takes fem home and it’s jealousy smut

this is my first aubrey story so i’m so sorry if this isn’t how she really acts!!

warning(s): cussing, smut, jealousy

genre: smut

pairing(s): jealous!aubrey griffin x reader

==================================

azzi was too close to you for aubrey’s liking, she was grabbing on your hips and pulling you close to her. aubrey knew azzi was doing it on purpose but it still pissed her the fuck off. “why is azzi like this?” aubrey asked kayla and ice as they sat next to aubrey and watched you and azzi dance, “i don’t know but if i were you i would’ve said something by now.” kayla said while taking a sip of her drink. “i agree, azzi does this stuff all the time.” ice said while nodding her head. aubrey got up and grabbed your hand and dragged you out of the club, “you’ve gotta stop dancing with azzi.” aubrey told you and she led you to the car. “i promise to you that nothing is gonna happen if we dance together and if something did happen you would know.” you reassured her.

she stayed silent and opened the car door for you, shutting it when you got in and going to her side. when she got in she started the car and drove out of the club parking lot. “aubrey i’m sorry, i’ll stop dancing with azzi and i’ll talk to her about touching on me.” you apologized while grabbing her hand from her lap and holding it, “it’s okay but why did you let it keep happening until i said something?” she questioned while squeezing your hand, “i didn’t think it would upset you because she’s your teammate and you know i won’t cheat on you.” you answered, starting to feel guilty about letting azzi touch on you like that. “look all i want you to do is stop dancing with her or tell her to stop touching you while you two dance. if she doesn’t stop then i’ll talk to her about it.” you nodded your head at aubrey after she said that.

when you two reached your apartment you went inside and she immediately kissed you, not even closing the door behind her. “close the door” you told her as you pulled away, she turned around and closed the door then kissed you again and spun you around so you were pinned against the door. her hand went down to your jeans, “can i?” aubrey asked, you nodded your head before unbuttoning your jeans for her. she put her hand down your pants and toyed with your clit softly. “mmh.” you moaned on her lips, putting your hands on her shoulders. she put her fingers in you and thrusted in and out, “nobody will ever fuck you like i do.” aubrey said against your lips, finger-fucking you faster.

“fuck.” you moaned while throwing your head back. aubrey putting her lips on your neck and sucking, leaving a dark hickey. the way she fucked you made your legs shake and your knees were so close to buckling, you wanted needed more from her. “aubrey please i need more” you pleaded while aubrey went faster. this sent you completely over the edge, you moaned loud and your legs started shaking harder. “holy shit aubrey.” you moaned out while leaning your head on her shoulder. “i’m cumming aubrey, please don’t stop.” you begged as you came in her fingers. she removed her hand and lead you to bathroom to clean her hand off as you got in the shower.

when you were washing your body, aubrey came in the shower with you. “hey.” she greeted while touching your soapy hips, “hi.” you greeted back pulling her under the water. she kissed you again and smiled when she pulled away. “i love you and im sorry for getting mad at you earlier.” she apologized, “it’s okay, you had a reason to be mad. i’ll talk to her about it.” you smiled at her and gave her another kiss. when you two were done in the shower you got in bed and watched amovies, after the movie ended you two cuddled up and went to sleep, “goodnight y/n, i love you.” aubrey said, “goodnight aubrey, i love you too.”

==================================

im so sorry if it seems short but im so burnt out on writing smut that i barely have any ideas and i feel like im reusing things that ive already wrote. i hope you enjoyed it and i hope you have a good day/night, love you 💋💋

[drenched-in-sunlight]

Your genuinely one of my favorite elden ring artists, what would you say is your favorite aspect of elden ring just in general

this might be a big revelation but i think my favourite part about Elden Ring is i... actually don't really like it until the DLC.

the way the base game presented a kinda basic and fragmented story, one i'd even say i were underwhelmed about. because i went in expecting Sekiro-level of character driven writing (they did promise that in an interview) and what i got... ehhhh. that's why my fanarts for the base game is literally just fluff pieces and shipping Malenia with another character altogether that isn't even in the game. meanwhile my AC6, Sekiro and Bloodborne art... i think you can tell i have a very deep emotional connection to those games from the kind of work im putting out for them. (hell, before the DLC i actually was thinking "well i'll probably only draw some general fanarts after the DLC then go back to draw more JJK stuffs lol" famous last words)

but holy mother of God the way the DLC completely blew everything tf up.

sorry Fromsoftware, i were not aware the Sekiro character-driven part is actually about the DLC. im sorry im still not familiar with your game yet 😭

(this turns into a mini rant so imma put it under cut OTL)

before, i were pretty "...." about Elden Ring female cast. i think Melina appears too little, i think NPCs like Fia and Roderika... i can't figure out the significance of them within the narrative at all. and it kinda upset me because it feels like they regress back to the helpless / fanservice maiden trope that was usually seen in DS franchise for no reason. i don't like how Rennala ends up as and i don't like not knowing why Radagon did that to her (which turns to me not liking the way it became a popular fanon that he actually loved her he was just bound by duty etc etc...i mean what?), i actually don't even really like how Malenia's barely-there story turns out (but that's a rant for another day).

as standalone characters, sure, i'd say they all have their own merits, but if they don't play any role within the narrative... what's the point then?

but all of that is because back then, we literally did not know what's Marika's deal either.

and so she became this cardboard that everyone pins all the crimes and bad things in the world on, which is... fine? makes sense. but the following line of reasoning that she did all that because she's just...like that drives me up the wall. if i want another "woman bad" story i'd just replay DS2 😭

and that line of thought also distance her from other characters in the game. those stories are not lining up, so we literally see no point in anything.

but by giving us Marika's story in the DLC they:

shine light on the possible division between two Numen factions (Anna & Jolan story + Sword of Light & Darkness // no one is left in Marika's home (those embraces Light/Gold/ Greater Will and its Stars children) vs the Numens in Eternal City (those embraces Dark/ Black Moon/ opposing GW and its children)

the discontent with the Moon and how there are those who will never accept it as being equal to the Stars

the other half situation

the Marika's eye colour possible reveal (link her to Roderika - Roderika as a reflection of the maiden Marika once was and probably still is deep down)

give Godwyn more agency in his ending (his personal knights are on a quest for Age of Duskborn) -> link Marika to Fia (Fia as a reflection of the mother Marika is)

draw direct parallel between Messmer - the child carrying Marika's vengeance for the past, to Melina - the child carrying Marika's hope for the future

Marika as a God full of human flaws >< Miquella as a God devoid of all human emotions. both are bad in different ways. but share a same gentle origin of a simple wish for a kinder world.

the DLC singlehandedly swipes clean every problem i have with the base game. like im actually in awe they managed to do that so efficiently 😭

all that is to say. my favourite aspect of all is truly how one's perspective of this one character could alter the entire story.

i still dislike the interpretation that Marika is cold and heartless or that's she's cruel for no reason, but at the same time, i can see how ppl viewing her that way affect how they see other events in the game. just like how my view of her changes my entire view of the story itself too. and i just love how the writers pull that off really skillfully. man. and i think that's sth so unique to videogame storytelling. it's amazing!

[imbestforyou]

you belong with me

pairing: jj maybank x bestfriend!reader

summary: reader is in love with jj, but jj’s dating another girl…

warnings: unmutual pining, minor profanity, poorly edited, cliffhanger (sorry i got lazy), short pt. 2 if people want it idk, little angst and fluff

approx. reading time: 8 minutes and 30 seconds

writing inspo: you belong with me (taylor’s version) by taylor swift

masterlist :)

“wait what?” i exclaimed. i was sitting in sarah’s room listening to her talk about her day at the beach with the pogues.

“yes i swear! he brought emily there and had his arm wrapped around her and everything! didn’t even surf, which is crazy for jj.”

“so he must be serious about this girl, right?” i sighed as i layed on her bed. i couldn’t believe it. jj maybank? in a relationship with a kook girl?

“i mean i don’t know much. but if i’m being honest, he didn’t seem that interested in her.” she talked as she curled her hair for her date with john b. i stayed silent. i couldn’t believe it.

————————————————————————————

“hey y/n!” i stopped in my tracks. i knew that voice all too well. and it was the voice of someone i had been ignoring for the past two weeks. i turned slowly to face him.

“hey.” i said looking at the floor. purposely avoiding eye contact. it wasn’t that i didn’t want to see jj, i did. but it hurt to know he was dating someone else. especially emily, someone who was drastically different from me, from all the pogues to be honest.

“i feel like i haven’t seen you in forever. what’s up with that? sarah told me you’ve been sick, but i told her that was bullshit. you haven’t gotten sick since like the 3rd grade.” he grabbed me by the shoulders playfully. i look up to see emily staring at me from the bar.

“uh yeah. i don’t know what happened. probably got it from my parents after they came back from new york.” it was a lie. my parents hadn’t been to new york in ages.

with emily giving me a death stare and jj touching me, i was feeling claustrophobic and a little freaked out, “anyways look i’ll see you later. i have to get home and get some homework done.” i turn around and start walking before he can begin a sentence.

————————————————————————————

you're on the phone with your girlfriend, she's upset

she's going off about something that you said

‘cause she doesn't get your humor like I do

my eyes were closed while i sunbathed on the beach before i was interrupted by another call on my phone.

jj <3 - 3 missed calls

jj <3 - calling now

“hello?”

“y/n? y/n! hey how- how are you doing?” he stutters a bit.

“hey i’m doing fine? are you okay? you sound a little weird.”

“i’m good just pissed at emily.” he huffed.

“ahh emily. so how is your new girlfriend?”

“she’s pissed at me for some lame joke i made with pope. and she called attacking me and shit because i was being a douchebag or something.”

“ha what else is new.” i joke. and he laughs which stops my heart for a minute. i pause then ask,

“what was the joke?” i ask, curious to know why emily would be so upset.

“i told her the dress she was wearing looked like a hospital gown and she got all pissed. wasn’t even a good joke…” he mumbled.

i laughed, he was right. it wasn’t, i could think of thousands of jokes better, but i could tell it must’ve been an attempt to make emily and pope laugh.

“i guess she doesn’t get your humor.”

“guess not…” he sighs then starts again,

“hey l was wondering if you wanted to hang out later. i don’t know i’ve been feeling really distant from you recently.

“yeah i’m sorry about that, um so like with the pogues or…?”

“nah just yo- sorry hold that thought emily’s calling me and i really don’t want to make her more mad. i’ll call you back.”

he never called back.

————————————————————————————

im in the room, it's a typical tuesday night

im listening to the kind of music she doesn't like

and she'll never know your story like I do

a week had passed and he still hadn’t called me. i wasn’t even trying to ignore him anymore, he just was never around. school had ended and summer break had finally begun. and still no call.

as i layed on my bed and sang along to “the blue” by gracie abrams, sarah tries convincing me to talk to jj.

“why don’t you just call him? see what’s up? it’s not like him to be this distant. it’s with john b too, hasn’t been to the chateau recently. and you know how his dad is.”

“a shitty father is what he is.” i spit out. even though i was irritated at jj for not even trying to keep any communication between any of the pogues my hatred for luke will always be worse.

i sit up, “look he’s probably fine and with emily. i’ll talk to john b to get him to chill. but honestly i don’t think jj wants to keep contact with any of us. if he wanted to he would have.”

“i don’t know, you should call him. emily has like tied him up all for herself. have you noticed that?”

but she wears short skirts, I wear t-shirts

shes cheer captain and im on the bleachers

dreaming 'bout the day when you wake up and find

that what you're looking for has been here the whole time

“i mean i think everyone has. or that fact that she’s nothing like any of us and exactly like the type of girl he would make fun of.”

“a kook princess, like what i was.”

“exactly. i don’t want to judge him but why would he go into a relationship with someone who he so obviously doesn’t like?”

“something is up y/n. go figure it out.” she grabbed my car keys and pushed me out the door.

————————————————————————————

standing by and waiting at your back door

all this time, how could you not know, baby?

you belong with me, you belong with me

i take a deep breathe before knocking at his door.

no response. i knock again.

“hello! anyone home?”

“shut the hell u- y/n?” jj opens the door.

“hi- hey i just came to check on you. can i come in?”

he turns back, no doubt looking for his father. “probably not the best idea.”

“yeah- yeah uh wanna go to mine? so we can talk?” he nods and shuts the door behind him. he doesn’t make eye contact but all i can do is stare at the blood on his face and knuckles.

oh, I remember you driving to my house

in the middle of the night

im the one who makes you laugh

when you know you're 'bout to cry

and I know your favorite songs

and you tell me 'bout your dreams

think I know where you belong

think I know it's with me

i unlock my house from the back door to hopefully not make as much noise. my parents couldn’t find out i was sneaking in a boy in the middle of the night. i hurriedly close the door to my room and turn to him.

“are you okay?” i spill out.

“yes.” he’s quiet, that’s not the jj i know.

“you know you can talk to us, right? like any of the pogues, we’re here for you. i’m here for you.” i move closer and touch the blood on his forehead, and he winces. his head is sticky, like if he had been sweating. and i can’t decide whether it’s because of the humidity or if he was fighting with his father. probably both.

“luke?” he just nods. my heart breaks for him. i grab his hand and let him sit on my bed. i grab my first aid kit and rubbing alcohol and get to work on the blood and bruises on his hand and knuckles.

we sit in comfortable silence. but it was mostly me waiting to see if he was going to talk about his dad.

“i didn’t want to ignore you guys.” he speaks so low, i almost couldnt hear him. i kneel down so i can look at his face.

“then why did you?”

“i- i told my dad something, stupid i know. but he blew up on me a couple weeks ago. told me his boss had a nice daughter named emily my age. said if i could get with her, he’d get more money or some shit. i don’t know i guess i wanted to make him proud. so i- i started dating her. kept fucking it up and he would beat the shit out of me. didn’t want you guys to see me like that.”

i sighed. my hands were holding his for comfort. something we’d done since we were kids but felt really unfamiliar now.

“what’d you tell your dad to make him set you up with emily?”

he coughed, “told’m that i loved someone.”

my heart dropped for the second time in two months. why did i even think for a second that’d i’d have a chance? i told myself we belonged together.

“oh.” i got up and released my hands from his. suddenly feeling very uncomfortable. i cleared my throat.

“um well, i have some sleeping bags in my closet and if you want you can sleep in my bed or um whatever feels more com-“

“i told him i loved you.”

[bunnyluvs-blog]

TXTs reaction to you pulling another members photocard

txt x reader fluff, silly short storys, slight angst in Taehyuns and suggestive in Huenings

Choi Soobin: He isnt one to get jealous really, well thats what he thought. Soobin was watching you open up your own Temptation Lullaby Version. Ripping the packaging open and flipping the first page when you both see the name Hueing Kai. Soobin wasnt upset per say, but he was just a little bit pouty because you didnt get his version. Going through the photobook and gushing over the solo poster you got, Soobin was breaking bad. Then you go to to see the photocard, and oh boy. You got the slightly older makane Taehyun. You turn to Soobin to show him the photocard before he gets up and puts on his shoes. "Soobin ? Where are you going love ?" you ask, your mind confused. "Target" he says sternly. "Why?" "Im getting you my version and my photocard" you couldnt help but giggle. He pouts, "Why are you laughing?" you calm down and pull him to you, kissing his cheek. "I dont need a photocard or a certain version, when i have the real one right here" He smiles, still with a small pouts and goes back onto the couch to cuddle you.

Choi Yeonjun: Opening up your Temptation Nightmare version you were so excited. You saw the photocards while looking online and dont tell your boyfriend, but you were dying for Soobins photocard. You look through the freebies, and you honestly really like the bookmark. 10/10 will use. After looking through the photobook and all of that, you get to the photocard. AND YOU GOT SOOBIN. You let out a little happy noise. You put him in a photocard sleeve and plop him on your desk. Later that night Yeonjun comes home, planting a kiss on your lips and telling you hes going to take a shower. He walks into yalls bedroom to head to the bathroom when he sees his blonde haired leader sitting on your desk. He grabs it and walks over to you. "What is this?" he asked not really looking for an answer. "Erm, a Soobin photocard?" you respond looking at him weirdly. "Erm" he mimics, "Why isnt it me" You hold back a giggle at his actions. "Well maybe if you guys put more then one photocard in each album i wouldve gotten you" You say and he glares. "Fair." He turns and goes to the restroom. You know he isn't actually mad but will act like it after his shower to get some cuddles.

Choi Beomgyu: He was so so so pouty. You pulled Huening Kai which did not make Beomgyu happy. You put the photocard in your holder on your purse, and Beomgyu goes off. "WHAT" you glace at him. Very confused. "Why is huening on your bag and not meeeee" He clings to you and pouts, looking at you with his puppy dog eyes. "Because i always put my newest photocard on my bag?" "Nooo you always put me on your bag" The last few albums you have gotten have been Txt albums, which lucky for Beomgyu, you've pulled him. But his luck has run out and the tall baby of his group is doing his iconic peace sign pose on your bag. You finally calm him down and you go to get ready for bed, little do you know. Beomgyu was putting in his photocard on your bag and taking Huening and putting him in your collection. Beomgyu didnt care about how you would yell at him about it in the morning, because at least he would 'be' with you through the day.

Kang Taehyun: He wasnt jealous at all. He knows how much you love him and no silly photo of one of his group mates was going to change that. Ok well maybe he was a little bit jealous over the fact of how much you were smiling when you pulled Taehyuns oldest member Yeonjun. It was a good picture of him no doubt about that. And the fact you were smiling so much about pulling him made he do a double take on who your bias was. It was him right? "Why are you so happy? Is Yeonjun your bias now?" He ask, not upset but with a light chuckle to maybe hide the fact he was hoping you would come cuddle him and smile at him 2x as bright. "Im ot5 !!" Owie, hearing he wasn't your bias made him a little bit sad. Your poor baby just wanted to be your favorite in everything. He knows it wasn't a big deal but why did it sting. You saw your boyfriends playful smile turning into a sad one just like that. "Butttttt if i had to pick it would be you, your so handsome and talented, your voice is good for so many things and I love how you use it when you sing." You say putting down the album and pulling Taehyun close to you snuggling into his chest. He wraps his arms around you and kisses your head. "I bet if he saw you he would think you're really cool too babe" You let out a giggle at his words before kissing Taehyuns lips softly and putting the goodies away.

Huening Kai: If any of the members were pouting before Huening throws it out of the park. He watched you open your album, showing off everything like you're in a YouTube unboxing video. Huening was all smiles until you got the the photocard. He was hoping that you got him, he honestly really liked how his photos came out. Everything was fun and games until Beomgyu showed up in your hand. "Ohh baby look I got gyu !!" You showed off the photocard not realizing that your boyfriend was pouting, like a little baby. Hybe was not on his nice side today for giving him the album with the wrong photocard. "Pfft you got gyu and not me!! Mine was better" you're boyfriend said trying to convince you to get another album to get his photocard. You smirked at him playfully "But I like gyuuies photocard, he looks good" "Yea well not as good as me !!" His pout only got worse as you teased him. And at the end of the day you would have to pay for it later but that wasn't on your mind now. "I should put him in a case front and center" you joked and Huening was hurt. "NOOOO HES GONNA REPLACE ME" he slightly yelled out, clinging onto you to hold you in place. You couldn't help but laugh. He was so cute when he was pouty. In the end you had to pinky promise him you weren't gonna swap the photocard and just put the new one with the rest. Which left you a happy boyfriend and a sore back the next day.

[cruciomee]

Why do you like the Greens so much. You seem very kind and it’s weird to me you like the clear villains/usurpers of the story (especially because they die out).

Honestly, I would normally be upset at this kind of question simply because I hate discourse. I am a people pleaser & in my heart I want everyone to be happy in the fandom. So normally, I would ignore this but not gonna lie. This question was kind of funny.

First & foremost, I was really neutral before I joined Twitter. I did not care about the silly who has more right to rule nonsense. I read fire and blood before the show came & the only thing I was looking forward to was “The Battle Above the Gods Eye” & Sunfyre coming back (because that dragon comes back!) Characters on both sides were equally interesting, but also equally boring for me. It was a specific part of the fandom on twitter to turn me so team green

On a sheer engagement level I have found that anything I draw with team black does not get very much interaction. You would think that ifRhaenyra is the most popular character in the show, if you draw something of her you will get some from of engagement but that is most definitely not the case. so sometimes I wonder if she actually has fans or is this fandom just full of people looking for a fight & use her as their excuse. Either way, I like drawing team black characters but what’s the point if no one wants to actually see it.

Now onto my personal opinions, I like my favorite characters to suffer. I hate cookie cutter happy go lucky stuff. The better a character is made to seem the more I don’t care about them. They become extremely boring to me. Im someone who likes a messy character. The more toxic the person the better. just because I like that kind of character doesn’t mean it has any effect on me as an actual person. fiction is not the same as reality! I don’t like discord in reality, but I love it in fiction! I hate toxicity in reality, but I love it in fiction! Aegon ii is a pathetic trashcan & I love to see him suffer. I can’t wait to see him burnt & broken! I also can’t wait to see him force himself off of Milk of the poppy & for his dragon to come back to him against all odds. I’m so ready to see his death, he needs to be alone & miserable. The fact I’m a kind person who honestly loves drawing kids & family interactions more than anything has nothing to do with what I want to see/read. I read some crazy toxic fanfic & the character I like the most is always the one getting emotionally destroyed in them. Everyone has their thing that they are into & I would never judge them so why should you judge me for liking a bunch of miserable losers who wear green in a show about dragons fighting for no good reason other than on who has more privilege to sit on a metal chair made of swords.

[yand3reskullz]

Yandere loser (mini fic)

nsfw? (masturbating etc. shit like that not really bad tho)

You ran into him at the park but didn't seem to recognize him but of course he knew who you were the moment he saw you it did kind of make him sad at the thought you didn't recognize him, but you soon noticed him looking at you he quickly turned his head the other way you obviously confused but he seems upset, and you decide to talk to him, he seems nervous but like the good person you are you want to check up on him to see if he's okay.

yo dude are you okay I couldn't help but see you over here you looked a little down and I just wanted to check on ya to see if you were alright

"h-huh o-oh yeah! I'm alright thanks for checking on me though you're very kind ah I see... you're still the same kind loveable person as you were back in preschool always checking up on others to see if their okay, you're just so thoughtful...

huh did you say something?

o-oh! it's nothing i was just thank you for checking up on me! I really appreciate it no one's ever this kind to me...

ah no need to thank me I just think it's the least I can do you seem like you need a friend right now!

f-friend? you want to be my friend he thought of those romance story's where the friends become lovers hopefully that will happen between you both! he'll make sure of it he would always daydream about you two both being a happy couple and even getting married soon after delulu fr

I mean yeah why not speaking of that lets get to know each other better! what's your name? Sasha... well Sasha im y/n nice to meet you!

that's a really pretty name I like it

awe well aren't you just a charmer, well Sasha it was nice meeting you, but I have to go now but hey if you don't mind would you mind exchanging numbers before I go?

r-really?! you want to talk to me again? of course silly you seem like a shy but nice person I would love to know more about you! if you don't mind that is haha.

god he loved you and your laugh it was enough to make his day maybe even everyone's day you were just the brightest person he had ever met

well bye see you tomorrow!! "b-bye!" ... ahh... what a day today I met them again and they're as kind as ever...

Sasha slowly unzips his pants and his cock already sprung up damn he was hard already just from thinking about y/n they're just so perfect in every single way possible, when he finally had his hands on his length, he started off at a slow pace while thinking of y/n, they were a goddess in his eyes nothing could make him stop loving them as multiple images flashed through his mind of you he started going a bit faster n-ngh~ o-oh I'm gonna- ... fuck.. now he had a huge mess to clean up but at this point he didn't care he knew he was going to see y/n soon and he was ecstatic... see you soon my love<3

this was lowkey kinda rushed I just put something together rq because just making head canons don't sit right w me for some reason uhhh I take requests! and all that just ask me anything anyways bye!!

[dayseedrawz2]

My thoughts on episode 3 + theories!!

I'll talk more about this on my YT, but for now here's a tumblr version

(SPOILERS BELOW)

Okay so starting off, my unfiltered thoughts throughout the episode

-They actually spend time together when outside the adventures aww! (Not like they really have a choice, but still neat-)

-Jax being a bitch

-"Zooble turns Straight" Welp, the whooooooole fandom was right!

-Bubbles reversed dialouge. Damn they really don't want those content farms no more.

-CAINE AN POMNI INTERACTION YEAAAA (It was one piece of dialogue I'm so delusional)

-He made this adventure JUST for Zooble cuz they never go and he really wants them to GUYS HES NOT A VILLAN SEE?

-Jax being a bitch

-LUIGIS MANSION REFRENCE FUCKING YESSS

-Wow the visual here are super pretty :o

-...and horrifying

-Jax being a bitch

-I haven't mentioned yet but the lil quirky powers or whatever are cool

-Wow the lore Caine writes for these stories is just like your average artist who torments their OCs (he so me fr)

-2D ANIMATION!!! Also Kinger and Pomni being like the funniest duo ever

-HOLY FRICKLE FRACKLE THEY DEFINITELY DID NOT WANT CONTENT FARMS TO FIND THIS EPISODE

-the monster is awesome looking tho

-THE THERAPY SESSION SEGMENTSS AAA

-Also Caine has a Trans flag hanging somewhere in the circus neat

-He forgot he could use his powers to just teleport Zooble to him lol

-Back to the spooky stuff

-Wow Kinger can actually use a gun! (Never thought I'd be saying that sentence-)

-KINGER AND POMNI GO TO ACTUAL HELL WHILE THE REST JUST HAVE A TEA PARTY WITH MARTHA

-Also JAX IS TIED UP BAHAHAHA

- "You know how men are, always having the silliest priorities..." "Heh, dont i know it!" I think the bunny doll shippers really like that scene

-Zooble has some sorta body dismorphia and has opened up about it to Caine multiple times seems like

-Uhh Caine... you okay buddy? CAINE YOU GOOD BRO? CAI

-CAINE HAS EMOTIONS/SELF AWARNESS CONFIRMED???

-Pomni gets fucking posessed ok

-now we know why it looked like kinger was hitting Pomni with the shotgun

-KINGER AND QUEENIE WERE MARRIED CONFIRMED???

-Father daughter bonding aww...

-I love how the whole fandom took one good look at Ragatha and went:

GAY GAY GAY HOMOSEXUAL GA-

-also Pomni and Ragatha are on good terms now aww...

-Caine and Zooble Should Pass that pipe from ep 2 and legitemently vent to each other

-Jax is pissed because the Jester actually had a good fucking day for once lmao stay mad

-NOW WE KNOW WHY HE STAYS IN THAT PILLOWFORT IM GONNA FUCKIN CRY NOW

Overall, this was definitely my favorite episode so far! The team is getting better each and every episode! SOOO much happened here!! I'm super excited to see what happens next!!

Okay, THEORY TIME!!

-Okay so to start lightly, so far, all the episodes we've seen contain:

Gangles mask breaking

Jax breaks the 4th wall

A cute/sad heart to heart conversation or interaction

A reference to angels or god or Christianity in some way

Interesting right?? Wonder if this keeps up...

-On the topic of Christianity, I saw a theory saying that if it's true that the gang developed the game (which may be true because of that computer science line), When Pomni says "I knew it would end up like this... He just wants me to suffer..." she may not be referring to Caine, but her Boss at CnA.

If that boss exists and is NOT named able, Imma be mildly upset-

-Okay, Alot of people have been talking about Jax being an NPC, and I wanna bring up my opinion on this:

As I mentioned earlier, he always breaks the 4th wall, witch could be seen as a character in a game being like "What do YOU think?" *Insert Game Options here*

I saw another theory saying that if this is true, Jax might be self aware or sentient to some degree, and This is why he tortures everyone. He knows that this world Revolves around the players and nit him so he wants to make them more miserable.

-OKAY, NOW WHAT (I) WEVE ALL BEEN WAITING FOR... THE WHOLE DEAL WITH CAINE GLITCHING OUT AN' STUFF!

As one of many Caine angst connisuars on this platform, I really enjoyed this scene...

Caine knows that he only exists to make adventures and if he can't do it well enough than he serves ZERO purpouse and his existence is useless... (he's just like me fr)

This has SO MUCH POTENTIAL FOR A SERIES FINALE.

Since in each episode we've (mostly) seen a character being comforted (mostly Either Pomni being comforted OR someone being comforted BY Pomni)

What if the last episode had Caine and Pomni having a heart to heart?

(Shutup this is not about showtime I swear let me have this-)

Someone abstracts, (Ragatha or Kinger probably,) and it's Caine's last straw. He finally breaks and the circus goes into ruins. Pomni does her best to comfort him. This could go one of two ways:

Either she sucseeds and happy ending for everyone :D

OR, they fail and The Circus is destroyed, Taking Caine down with it.

Maybe then that would be how they escape cuz if Caine is emotionaly attached to the circus, it would be completely destroyed or erased if Caine finally broke...

The angst potential is crazy...

This is terrifyingly close to what I wanted to do with R-M AU UHHH I MEAN-

Anywayyyy I believe that's all! If yall have anymore theories lemme know!!

[persona-brainrot-real]

a very long about haru because i love her and im upset about how the game let her story get overshadowed at every turn

its nearly 3am rn but i'm thinking about how genuinely insane it is for persona 5 to introduce Haru as a character who is struggling to find any of her autonomy and treat her the way that they do. her father is marrying her off to a man who makes it explicitly clear he wants to use her for sex and even Okumura, in his palace, is shown to understand this.

[ID: three screenshots of Persona five royal. In the first, Haru in her Phantom Thief outfit says "Father! You want me to be that mans plaything to satisfy your own ambitions?" the second is of Shadow Okumura, looking angry, saying "This is the only value you've had from the very beginning. The third image is before the boss fight against the cognition of Haru's fiance. He is saying "let's have fun! I'll play with you until I get bored!"]

even outside of the palace, in their daily life he makes it extremely clear that he has no intent on trusting Haru with company business (likely because he expects the company to be handed off to her husband after he dies) and he doesn't acknowledge her feelings or anything she says to defend her own autonomy (i know this is me reciting everything in the game i do have a point)

[ID: three screenshots of Persona five royal. In the first, Haru is upset as she says "So I'm not even allowed to decide where I will live, am I?". In the second, Okumura is saying "not only do you come home late, you've even stayed out overnight without permission..." looking disapproving. In the third image, Okumura is saying "I have my hands full right now with the company. Don't cause any more trouble for me." He is holding his phone.]

even when she first joins your team, she tries to insist on being useful and fighting, considering this is her request and her fathers palace, and morgana tells her she cant. i know its 'for her own sake' that she cant fight, but considering that Morgana was there when she first awakened and planned on using her to get through a palace alone, its really frustrating to then see him say shes not strong enough to fight in a team.

[ID: two screenshots of persona five royal. Both are taken in Okumura's palace. In the first, Haru is saying "I can fight too! Please, let me join you in battle!". In the second, Morgana is saying "Your persona is too weak to fight safely at the moment. Just leave that side of things to us for now."]

and this comes in AFTER morgana, while using her, gets her to insult his friends on his behalf because hes annoyed with them, even though she's visibly uncomfortable doing so, contradicts what morgana wants her to say, and is shown later to have no real malicious feelings for them - and all of the bitter feelings she DID have were because morgana told her that the PT's were mean and didn't treat him right or didn't need him, which wasn't true to begin with, and is why she has to ask him for direction on what to say,

[ID: Haru looks upset. She stands opposite the Phantom Thieves and looks at Morgana. She is asking him "What was it again?"]

and you bring all of this into a brilliant character of a girl who is so self-assured, so firm on what she wants and her own autonomy - i want to be a Phantom Thief, i want to be a hero, i want to have my autonomy but more importantly i want to earn it, i want to change my fathers heart myself so that he becomes a better person and a better business owner, i want to prove to him that i can be trusted with the company and that i have more worth than being married off - but never really gets to express that? Even when it comes to the fight with Okumura and her chance to have her moment - the moment where Yusuke tells Madarame he's a coward who lost sight of his passion, where Ann gets to tell Kamoshida that he's only alive because she wants him to live through all he's done (both in the palace and the real world), where Futaba gets to talk to her mom directly in a scene that always makes me tear up - Haru's moment to stand up to her father is overshadowed by her father speaking to Morgana instead!!!!!

i know that this could also be a huge meta moment - he sees his daughter standing up to him, defending herself, and dismisses her entirely to try and appeal to the next rational subject, a man, but . the man is a cat. it doesnt work as well if he turns to a cat to be like "well certainly you'll be more reasonable" and turns the focus to Morgana - who has already taken up a lot of time that Haru deserved to have recognised!!!!

i have issues with morgana, yes, and I believe a lot of that arc could have been really useful character building for him if it had been handled slightly better, given more weight and better pacing, but it really wouldn't have been such a big problem for me if it hadn't been pushed so heavily during Haru's character moments, because she is SUCH a good character!!!!

in her first appearance she makes for a really good subversion of what the PT's think that they are. her insistence on working for justice helps them work through their temporary doubt for what their purpose is and by having such a difficult situation happening in her life, she unites them all on something that they have to do. At least until they go to Okumura's palace for the first proper investigation, the intent to rescue Haru from her fiance is more important than the Phan-site and more important than any of Okumura's business practices.

she prioritises everyone elses happiness over her own to the point where she watches her father die on live television and tells the PT's to continue having fun at destinyland without her without considering that they'd want to be there for her. She has always suspected that people only wanted to be her friend for her money - and this seems to have affected her so much that despite being 'secretive about her history' at Shujin, she still doesn't mention at any point whether or not she has friends and is only seen speaking with teachers.

after her fathers death she has no real reason to trust any of the PT's - they were navigating with an unknown method, with no proof to show that what they were doing wouldn't cause a mental shutdown, they barely know each other, and yet she trusts them in spite of this and places her faith in the PT's regardless. even when faced with the person who DID kill her father, she understands that his death was a larger piece in a bigger plan and that it wasn't akechi's fault, it was the fault of Shido for ordering him dead, and in Shido's palace she's able to get the catharsis of killing the cognition of the person who aired her fathers death publicly on TV.

And what I think is a more frustrating part than any of that - where all of the Phantom Thieves, after their palace, get following story beats that increase their importance to make sure that you, as the player, can get attached to them, but the more PT's that join the team, the harder it is to juggle all of those characters and a lot of them have very vocal and prominent personalities that keep them involved. Yusuke's general quirks and behaviour keep him interesting, Makoto has an entire arc that's established ages before she's involved in Kaneshiro's palace, Futaba becoming navigator keeps her relevant, but where Haru's arc is taken over by Morgana in the palace where she's introduced, all subsequent story beats are entirely overtaken by Akechi.

Don't get me wrong, I love Akechi and he is in my brain 24/7, but it is extremely unfortunate that her fathers death immediately kickstarts the section of plot where the PT's realise that they're being tricked, meaning the plot suddenly ramps up, and during the school fair (something Haru is explicitly very excited about), Akechi's growing popularity and prominence in the story takes centre stage, especially as a day later he blackmails the PTs and joins their party.

Again, not complaining about Akechi, its just unfortunate that Haru's main story is clouded over by Morgana having a character arc and then the fan favourite comes in and immediately becomes the most prominent character for almost the entire rest of the game. It's sad because I love Haru but it wasn't until I romanced her that I realised how much I love her and how much there is too her - which ESPECIALLY sucks because it makes the section where you're reassuring her in the velvet room fall so flat compared to how you reassure everyone else.

ALL to say that i think it's wild to have a character whose entire arc routinely revolves around proving herself and reclaiming her autonomy from the men in her life, like her father and her fiance, and having her character arc so heavily influenced and even overshadowed by morgana, a male character. thank you guys for listening and if you disagree with me consider writing what your opinions are on your own post and not on mine :3

Anyway. huge rant post over. Haru is my wife and my girlfriend and my silly rabbit and i think she should be hyped up way more. ESPECIALLY for her showtime attack with makoto because that's fucking adorable. everyone must post one thousand haru okumura positivity posts right now

[ID: a gif of Haru Okumura, in her Phantom Thief outfit, holding her hat with one hand and pointing with the other. She says "I am no longer your subservient puppet!" while looking determined.]

[its-a-me-mango]

Tbh, its not the fact that smg4 didnt become a villain angers me in this mini arc. In fact im happy he wasn't. The most thing that bugs me so much is this whole entire mini arc felt rushed and forced, It made me confused, it was messy in lots of places. I dont mind if Smg4 would do the same mistake bc nobody learns from their mistake immediately, but right now i feel like they forgot what mr puzzles put them through. Like the relationship between meggy and puzzles, can meggy really forgive someone who put her through hell in WS? Who enjoyed watching her dying over and over again? Thats the main thing that bugs me, ofc im not hating the show, i still love it, its just this whole entire thing after puzzlevision just seems messy

Hope in the future things will be better and explains more, i have high hopes, but right now i just feel like this whole thing is a disaster right now, like i have so many questions and this arc just made more

Hi I get where you're coming from I promise, but without trying to sound like mean, you had high hopes for the silly weekly meme show that doesn't take itself too seriously, I really don't know what else to say to that.

Maybe I'm waaay too easy, I am happy to just watch a bunch of characters that I like do silly things together and sometimes have a story too them, as long as it's funny and makes me laugh I really don't care about whatever takes place. Yes I love it when they are serious and they tell really good stories/arcs and I love that, but I don't take anything too seriously because the creators don't either, not in a bad way but in a fun and silly way. It's hard for me now to get upset over SMG4, I learnt what getting overhyped for SMG4 does and I'm not making that mistake again lol. At its core, it's a show made for fun, it's not trying to achieve any major story or plot, it's there to have fun and THAT'S what I love about it and why I can over look a lot of things to it.

Don't get me wrong I love taking this shit seriously sometimes for the sake of theorys and analysis and things like that, but when you're taking it more seriously than the creators, of course you're gonna stumble and fall and get confused and angry. I didn't wanna turn my whole response into a "lol don't take it so seriously" ramble but, I legit have nothing else to say because I STILL don't get it!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I WISH I COULD UNDERSTAND WHY PEOPLE ARE SO MAD OVER THIS ARC BUT I CAN'T!!!!! Whatever, I can't, lalalaaaa

Also I think Meggy can "forgive" Mr Puzzles or at least be at peace with what he did because she's seen that he is capable of caring for people, and you know Meggy just sees the good in people anyway, so yes she can because Meggy is cool, thaaaats my take lol :3

[rockermybuddie]

Comfort

A/n: this might be the first story i actually post. I have one finished and one in the works in my drafts im just too scared to post them lol.

Tommy x Evan (Buck)

Summary: When Tommy comes home and sees broken glass everywhere his first thought is Evan. He finds Evan pretending to be asleep in bed after a really rough shift and comforts him.

—————

~Bucks POV~

The moment the engines came to a stop in the bay i jumped out and went straight to the locker room grabbing my bag. “Buck!” Eddie calls out. I’m supposed to help stock the engine back up on supplies and clean up since its after shift but i’m too upset. “Leave him be.” Cap told Eddie.

I felt everyones eyes on me as i threw my bag in my jeep slamming my door shut. I drove out of there fast and went straight home.

When i arrived at home i saw that Tommys truck wasnt in his spot. I remembered that he said he picked up a shift which means he wont be home till later. That just made me a little more mad.

I unlocked the door and threw my bag down, I immediately went up stairs and took a shower to wash all the blood and soot off. I watched the red and black color go down the drain.

I got a flashback from the call and its all i could think about. My anger building inside of me about to burst. I got out of my shower and I couldn’t tell if the steam coming off of me was from the hot shower or if i was just that angry.

I walked downstairs to make dinner so i could try and get my mind off of the call. I got out the ingredients to make chicken parmesan pasta, Tommys favorite. I figured if i could just focus on Tommy i could get past this.

I got out a glass pan for the oven but set it down too hard out of anger causing it to shatter.

I didnt feel bad. It was just a glass pan. Usually i would be upset that i broke it but i dont feel anything but anger, not towards the broken glass.

Next thing i know im ripping open the cabinets knocking out everything, hearing the glass shatter on the floor and the need to break everything that can break.

I don’t remember anything after that, whatever happened after that was a blur.

————

~Tommys POV~

I pulled into the driveway and saw Evans jeep in the drive way, making a smile appear on my face because my love was home.

I walked into the house, i saw Evans bag tossed on the floor untouched which is weird because he always unpacks it and does the laundry.

“Evan?” I call out. No answer.

I put my bag next to his and make my way into the kitchen. I stopped in short when i saw all the cabinets open and they were empty. When i walked in further i saw all the broken glass everywhere. My first thought was we had an intruder. My instincts went straight to Evan. Where is he?!

“Evan!” I yell. I ran upstairs and swung open the bedroom door. My heart beating fast but slowed down a little when i saw him laying in the bed.

“Evan?” I say turning on the light, its only 7pm theres no way hes already asleep. “Evan i know you’re not asleep.” I walk over to his side of the bed.

I see his tear stained face as he looks up at me, his eyes are filled with sadness and his hands are shaking ever so slightly.

“Did someone break in Evan?” I ask him, maybe thats why hes so shook up. He shakes his head no.

“Whats wrong my love?” I crawl over him sitting on the other side. Buck moves to sitting between my legs leaning against me, his head resting on my shoulder.

He tells me about the call he was on about the call he was on and the whole time i just rubbed his head with my hand.

“I’m so sorry Evan. That had to of been rough.” I say when he finishes talking. “I know everyone there did their best. But sometimes those things happen. You had no control over that.” I tell him trying to comfort him.

“I’m sorry about the mess downstairs. I’ll clean it and buy new stuff.” He says. “Shhh, dont worry about that. I’ll deal with it okay?” I tell him, I kiss his forehead wishing i could take all his pain away.

“Thank you for this. I really needed it.” He says nesting his head deeper into my shoulder.

“Anytime.” I plant a kiss on his lips as we sat there a little longer.

———

A/n: i know this is a basic story, but my first ones gotta be a little rough to read. I hope you thought it was ok, lol. I will write more because of my non-stop brain but if this gets positive feedback i will post the others when i write.

[a-girl-in-neverland]

Once again, im here to complain about the bridgerton subplots and changes

So spoiler for Season 3 ahead

I hated that they just cast Anthony and Kate aside. Do they really had to go RUNNING to India and couldnt wait for FRANCESCA'S WEDDING???? Hello??? Werent they the head of the family??

The intention with that is great and loving but is the showrunner allergic to having Jonathan Bailey and Simone Ashley in our screens for more than 3 minutes????

Like at that scene of the night before Polins wedding. Colin mentions that Kanthony has "come back"??? From where??? Did they run off again??

(Also i would really like to know who Edwina married and a bit of her love story)

The way in which the writers simply forgot about benedict's art/painting plot is atonishing. The build up of S1 to S2 was great, with the art school, but then in S3 is like that never happened?? Why didnt they explore more Benedict's lack of purpose or even his disappoinment with Anthony's actions?? Noooo, they just rather have him have sex with people all season long

(Before you come after me, im not critizing Benedicts sexuality, im just pissed that his character had barely nothing to do this season other than have sex, but i did enjoy a lot his scenes with eloise)

The Mondrichs plot was sooooo inconsequential and had nothing to do with any other one in the entire season. What was the point of keeping them?????

Somehow the writers in this show can make up irrelevant plots for lukewarm characters but cant come up with anything for the most beloved ones

And lastly about Michaela Stirling. So many people on twitter are fighting over this that is sickening. But lemme tell you this, all my life i had the pleasure (or better, the experience) to see many books i adore turn into movies/tv shows. Sometimes in adapting change is good, sometimes is necessary. But this change alters the whole story.

To be clear, i am NOT trying to be disrespectul, or homophobic or even mean about it. I dont mind the representation. In fact i think stories centered around LGBTQ+ leads, in this period of time, is a niche that could be much explored. Bridgerton could inspire people who belong in this community to write these stories, which is great.

However, the change of introducing Michaela completely transforms Francescas story. The second-love with the exploration of sexuality trope has great potential. But changing so greatly a story thats well known between the fans is risky to say at least.

Francescas book is not my favorite (by far actually) but it is for a lot of people, and a lot of readers have been enamoured with michael for the last 20 years, at least. So i understand if people get upset, because i would too if my favorite couple/story changed so much out of the blue

And honestly, i think this is one of the ways the show is trying to remain relevant. I AM NOT trying to say that TV should use LGBTQ+ love stories as clickbait. But be serious, the books were written as 8 straight love stories, in todays society people would be complaining if they followed if by the rule.

Anyway, Polin were wonderful. Nicola and Luke you are so so so loved, we couldnt have actors that loved their characters more

(And at this point i might be a Portia Featherington stan, she grew a lot on me)

If you read this far, i hope you have a great week and please dont come for my critics, they are not hate opinions, i just needed to rant <3

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for calling my dad homophobic?

I (18f) identify as an asexual queer girl, and i live with my parents. My dad (52m) as well as the rest of my family are all devout mormons. surprisingly, my mom (47f) took my coming out fairly well. there was a phase of her telling me we could fix it and a phase of her avoiding the situation altogether, but ultimately she’s grown a lot and has become a huge ally over the past two years since i came out to her.

my dad was a bit more of an issue. he took the coming out with a grain of salt, and has since admitted that he thought i was just trying to be rebellious, and he completely brushed me off when i told him i was leaving the church, telling me and i quote “i don’t care if you leave because i know you’ll come back”, which always irritated me but i brushed it off. he’s also gotten a lot better at being respectful and while he still makes tasteless jokes sometimes, he usually seems to respect my identity and love me for who i am.

flash forward to a few days ago. i get home from work and i end up chatting with my parents as i usually do. the conversation turns to sexuality and my dad mentions how accepting he and my mom are, and i raise my eyebrows and remind him how uncomfortable they were when i first came out. i wasn’t upset at this point, rather just poking holes in his story. i mentioned how awkward he was when i came out as asexual, and my mom (who has found herself to be a bit on the asexual spectrum as well) and i chuckle about it for a second, before my dad defends that he wasn’t weird about it.

i reminded him how he COMPLETELY brushed it off when i first told him, and he told me that it means im not gay. i asked what he meant at the time, and his response was that “i consider the definition of gay to be having sex with someone of the same gender”. my sister was in a serious committed relationship with a man at this point in time, but (being mormon) they hadn’t had sex, so i asked my dad if i had that same level of relationship with a woman, if he would consider it gay, and his response was no. i proceeded to ask him if i married a woman and spent the rest of my life with her, kissing and sharing a bed and everything, would he consider it gay? he kind of scoffed at me and said “well, if you’re sleeping in the same bed, then EVENTUALLY you’re going to have sex”. that really upset me at the time, but he had only just learned about asexuality, so i cut him a break.

flash forward to a few days ago, i bring this up and rather than shrug it off and cringe the way he and my mom had been at other behaviors of theirs, he scowled and began to defend himself. he said that it didn’t make any sense to him, and why should it matter if he thinks that? i pointed out that learning to respect other people even if you don’t understand them is important, and he got a bit huffy. i mentioned the not considering me gay thing, and asked if he still felt that way. i expected a no or some sort of explanation, but instead he said “well if you’re not having sex with another woman then you’re not doing anything wrong.”

that immediately made me upset, and i responded with “are you saying that being gay is wrong?” and my mom jumped in and accused me of twisting his words. i left the room and eventually he came in and gave an awkward apology without really saying anything just before he went to bed (one of those “im sorry you got upset because of what i said” apologies rather than an actual apology), and i reluctantly told him it was fine, but i still don’t feel fine about it. i feel like he’s invalidating my identity and pretending like he did nothing wrong, but i don’t want to confront him about it if i’m actually just making a big deal out of nothing. aita?

What are these acronyms?

[missesmckinnon]

a few days late, but can i talk about the red white and royal blue movie for a sec?

im so happy i decided to buy and speed read the book before the movies release, because the book was very good, but the movie was disappointing for a few reasons. it wasn’t bad, it was a good movie, but is was kind of a let down. does that make sense?

sorry if this is incoherent, i just need to get all my thoughts out.

!! SPOILERS AHEAD !!

first, let’s talk about my biggest issue: june. where the hell was she? she was such a big part of the story, and she is apart of the [??] six, and before that the white house trio. there is no white house trio with only two people. i thought that june showed an interesting contrast to alex, not wanting to pursue a career in politics like he does. she became my favorite character instantly, and it was really upsetting that they cut her out.

second: powder princess bea. i know it wasn’t a big part of the story, but it irked me when they cut that part out. bea didn’t have a lot of character in the films, and the parts of her they did show she was basically there to show that henry had a sister that he liked. in the books, bea had a strong personality and a complicated past.

third: rafael luna. oh my god, why cut him out. alex looked up to him as a young, and openly gay, politician. him leaving to work for richards upset alex deeply, and when raf returned, they had a conversation about richards’ advances toward raf and why raf needed to leave in order to bring richards down. alex and raf had such a sweet relationship, and who tf do they think they are, replacing the rafael luna with some dude named miguel.

fourth: philip. in the movie, philip was kind of shown as some guy who values the crown and the traditions it has, but in the books, he’s a dick. it got so bad that bea and henry didn’t talk to him and turned him away when philip offed to help them. if they’d kept his personality the same, i think it would’ve given more depth to henry’s family and the pressure he’s under.

fifth: liam. liam wasn’t a big character, but, if i remember right, alex called liam when he was having his lil gay crisis, and liam showed up at an event at the end of the story. that’s how alex and henry got the bikes to go to alex house in texas.

sixth: henry’s mum standing up to the queen. considering that henry’s mum being emotionally absent was a big part of henry’s story, when catherine (henry’s mum) stood up to the queen and threatened to have her dethroned for suggesting that henry had to hide was a big moment. it showed that she really cared for her kids but was too consumed with her loss to be there for them.

seventh: pez love interest. in the movies, pez and nora had a romance, but in the books it was pez and june. pez and nora don’t make sense to me at all. junes personality was brought out in the best way by pez, and they complimented each other beautifully. but, since june was cut out, they had to do something i guess.

eighth: dialing down richards. richards is a very bad man, and that’s a theme throughout the book. the book is extremely political, so i understand not going too far into that, but richards made advances on luna and his team leaked the footage and emails between henry and alex. it was really dialed down in the film, which upset me.

let me know what you guys thought of the movie, though. the actors who played alex, henry, nora, and ellen were perfect, and taylor/nicholas had amazing chemistry.

[queenburd]

I played Zending last night and got to hear lines I’ve literally never, never heard before. It actually hurt.

Anyway here’s Zending fic. Im like. Neutral about it. It feels all over the place. Whatever.

—

He’s trembling.

Stanley sits at his desk, staring at the blinking green marker on his computer screen. He barely sees it.

(“I just wanted us to get along.”)

He stands abruptly. He steps out of his office.

“Where were all of his coworkers? Stanley decided to go to the meeting room—perhaps he had simply missed a memo.”

The voice is steady as ever. It does not waver. It does not whimper. It does not snarl.

Stanley will not be sick. Stanley will not crumple like wet cardboard.

He walks down the hall.

Takes the door on the left.

Goes to the boss’s office.

Turns off the mind control facility.

Steps outside.

Walks down the hall.

Takes the door on the left.

Goes to the boss’s office.

Turns off the mind control facility.

Steps outside.

Walks down the hall.

Takes the—

Both the doors close.

“Stanley, much as I appreciate you playing my game to its proper completion, I can’t help feeling like you’re not absorbing this the way you ought to.”

But—but Stanley is trying to, to play this properly. He’s trying to do what the fellow tells him to.

(“I just wanted us to get along.”)

“Your heart’s not in it, I can tell you that much. No, the story isn’t leaving the impression on you that it’s supposed to. You’re not getting anything out of it, which renders it moot.”

Stanley’s hands are balled up into fists. He grits his teeth tight to the danger of hurting himself. None of this should matter. None of it ever matters, he knows that. It always ends with him in his office, staring down a hall, a voice waiting for him.

“Well if it’s so meaningless, then why are you so adamant to play it?” The voice is offended, it’s clear by how it enunciates its words.

Stanley tries to breathe properly, a boiling anger making itself known.

(“I just wanted us to get along.”)

“And that! What is that, that you keep almost remembering? What in Heaven’s name has you so worked up?”

So it hadn’t bothered him, then? His voice breaking as he begged, pleaded—

Stanley grabs his temples. Squeezes his eyes shut. He doesn’t want to think about this. This is his enemy. It was a ploy, nothing more. He’s fallen for it, sure, but that doesn’t mean he needs to remember the vivid details of his shame.

“I don’t understand. What ploy, Stanley?”

Why was he pretending he didn’t know?! Does he enjoy mocking Stanley for being so gullible and weak? That Stanley would fall for such a cheap trick, some waterworks? Yes, fine! He may not like the fellow, but he’s not cruel and heartless! He—

“Stanley!” The voice interrupts, sounding honestly alarmed. “I’m not mocking you, I legitimately don’t understand. I—you’re starting to concern me, really!”

Stanley clutches his head and tries to control his breathing. The voice carries on, clearly anxious.

“I really don’t know what’s gotten into you. I know we went through the red door, saw the stars—did that ending really upset you so much? Because I—well,” it continues, sounding a bit put out, a bit disappointed. “I thought it was lovely. You didn’t like it?”

What part of throwing himself to his death repeatedly was Stanley supposed to like?

A long silence. Then:

“… what are you talking about? What does that mean?”

Wh—

He doesn’t remember?

“Stanley, what don’t I remember? What am I supposed to be remembering?”

He doesn’t remember.

A weight falls off Stanley’s shoulders.

“Stanley? Stanley, tell me what I’m supposed to remember!”

He inhales shakily to let out a sigh of relief. Okay. This changes things. He hasn’t ruined everything beyond repair.

“Stanley, don’t avoid the question!”

No, he doesn’t want to. He wants to play the game. He wants to move on.

“I cannot believe this! You’re behaving like a child! Just tell me what you’re hiding!”

No.

The narrator seethes. Stanley’s face is beautifully blank.

It’s for the best, honestly, that the narrator cannot remember. It’s a miserable thing, to remember. So Stanley doesn’t want to think about it, and that’s much easier to do when the other party can’t hold it over him.

“Fine. Fine. But you listen to me,” the voice hisses venomously. “I will find out what you’re keeping from me, if I have to rip it from your very skull. You try to keep your little secrets, Stanley. You’ll see. You can’t hide anything from me.”

The doors swing open with a bang. Stanley takes the door on the left.

He behaves all the way to the on/off switch, and then slams the ON button.

Alright, look, the fellow can work out some frustration. Stanley will press buttons in the meantime. They can both work off some steam and do something new. Win-win.

(“I just wanted—“)

There’s a low, dangerous chuckle.

“You don’t have the power you think you do. You never did, and you never will.”

There is no timer. The bomb goes off.

Stanley feels like he is flung into his office chair, and then he feels something—someone—pry its large, sharp claws into the fragile mass of his mind, and tear it open down the middle to rifle through the contents.

—

“If we just stay here, right in this moment, in this place… Stanley, I— I think I feel…. Happy. I actually feel happy!”

Stanley looks up at the stars. He watches the lights drift up.

It…

Fuck, but he has to hand it to the fellow. It is beautiful. Really, honestly beautiful.

But he can’t help how his eye keeps getting drawn to the staircase down to a door. Can’t help being curious.

“No… wait. Where are you going?” The voice is shaken from its reverie when he steps out of the room, like it was so entranced it almost hadn’t realized he’d slipped away.

He just wants to see what’s around the corner. They can go back, he just—

“Oh, no!”

Stairs. Stairs that go nowhere. Stairs that go up and up and up, with no other way but down.

Stanley feels his stomach drop. He steps back, through the doorway into the hall, and then turns on his heel and bolts to the room with the lights.

“Right,” the narrator says, clearly trying to recover, still frazzled. “Where were we?”

Lights. Lights. Stanley is staying here.

“Right. If we just stay here… we just have to stop moving.”

No moving. Okay. Okay.

The voice goes quiet. Stanley stays and looks up at the lights for a long time. His heart rate slows, his breaths deepen.

Okay. He’s feeling a lot more put together. And he can see that the narrator does want to show him something beautiful. He’s willing to try to compromise. He’s willing to play along, to meet in the middle.

The voice says nothing.

Very slowly, Stanley feels himself growing cold.

“We would both be so much happier if we just stopped.”

Oh. Stanley thinks he understands. It frightens him.

There is no story here. There is no progression. There is just this room. There is only the trap of happiness here, like the lotus eaters of the Odyssey. The cursed sweet fruit that keeps you from moving, from progressing.

That’s not a life. That’s not living. It’s only escapism. And all this means is that Stanley will never be happy here.

And, and the voice, quiet, lured in, eating the lotuses forever, will not reset, no matter how Stanley pleads. It thinks it knows what’s best.

Oh, god. He has to—

He has to—

Stanley inhales a shuddering breath and gets to his feet. Move. Move. Don’t think about it. Just move without thinking.

He makes it to the bottom of the stairs before the voice finally seems to come to its senses.

“No! What did we talk about?! You’re risking everything we achieved here!”

Stanley takes another breath to brace himself.

“Please, no, Stanley! Let me stay here! Don’t take this away from me!”

It pleads. It begs. When he doesn’t die from the first fall, it takes shuddering breaths and tries again to coax him to see reason.

God, he wants to. His steps are slow—pain creeps up his body.

But Stanley can’t. He knows he can’t. He knows that he’s not just fighting for himself.

He has to do this for both of them.

“I can’t go back to the way I was before!”

God, he’s sorry. But this isn’t living. He feels like he’s trying to hold an addict back from a drug, and it’s cruel, but it has to happen, it has to.

Stanley… is not this thing’s friend. He’s not. It tells him again and again that he has no power. He’s just a plaything for it. A toy. It keeps him in this unending prison and tries to break him when he does anything it deems a distraction.

But he likes to think he’s a good person. He doesn’t act out of malice. Mischievousness, maybe. It’s a little fun to see the fellow fuss, since he’s so dramatic. But cruelty? Stanley doesn’t act out of cruelty. It never grants him the same regard, it’s plenty cruel to him, but he doesn’t take any sick pleasure from trying to return the favor.

But this is cruel.

The voice cracks. With each fall, it loses hope. It gives up on him.

“I just wanted us to get along. But I guess that was too much to ask.”

Stanley wishes he felt angry. He wishes he could feel a spark of resentment at that statement, when the narrator has done so much to him that would dissuade any sensible person from considering that getting along was still an option.

He wishes it all the way down.

But all he feels is shame.

—

“I—“

The presence reels back, away and out of Stanley’s memories, out of repulsion or horror he cannot tell.

Stanley wants to scream. He covers his head and neck with his arms and braces for retribution, for the rage he expected when he first woke up after those stairs faded from his vision.

He had expected anger. Cruelty. Vengeance. He had tried to play along, to ease his punishment if he could. To maybe show his remorse.

(“I just wanted—“)

Fuck, fuck. It’s going to hurt him.

“I…”

He hadn’t done it to be cruel, he hadn’t done it to be powerful, he’s sorry, he knows he let him down, and he wishes the fellow could have just been happier not remembering. He could have kept this burden to himself.

“Why don’t I remember?”

It’s not directed at him. The voice is asking itself. It seems lost.

“I…”

There’s the rustling of papers.

“We. We go into the room,” the narrator starts haltingly. “We come to an understanding. And then I reset. I—that’s what it says. It says that I—but I didn’t—“

Stanley is shaking.

“But I… I couldn’t….”

Please. He’s sorry. He knows it’s going to hurt him, but please, don’t hurt him too badly.

“Oh, Stanley.”

It seems only now to notice him, his terror. His withdrawal. He doesn’t think it’s ever seen him so afraid, not even in the ending with the bomb. And of course it hasn’t. Because that’s just death. Death is scary, but quick.

Pain can last. When done by experts, it can last a long, long time.

(“I just wanted us to get along.”)

“Stanley?” The voice is small. It’s said the same way it was said when it asked him to please, please go back to the other room. “I’m… it’s. It’s okay. You’re okay. It—it’s going to be fine.” It strengthens a bit. Clears its throat. “It’s just an ending. It’s over, alright? We’re none the worse for wear.”

He gets the sense that, if it could, the voice would be placing a hand so gently on the spread of his back, between his stretched shoulder blades, in an attempt to get him to relax. Try to bleed the tension out of him.

“The lotus-eater comparison was… quite clever,” the narrator offers, a small olive branch. “I’m not angry with you, Stanley. After all, I did just see it all through your eyes. I know you weren’t being intentionally cruel.”

It doesn’t make things better.

“Well, no, but intent does matter.” The narrator sighs. “Gosh, you really weren’t kidding about that being miserable. Ignorance really is bliss, sometimes, isn’t it?”

Stanley chokes on a wet laugh. Understatement of the century.

God. It’s so unfair that the most beautiful place in the game so far is so dangerous.

“You liked it that much?” The narrator’s voice is hopeful and perhaps a bit shy.

Yeah. He had.

The fellow preens a bit, humming happily. “Well, I’m sure I can come up with something just as good. And—maybe—maybe I’ll remember now. Maybe we can go back.”

Stanley shivers.

“Oh, no no no, not now. Certainly not. Mustn’t be too careful. Poor fellow. What I mean is—if you need a break. Since—well, since we dealt with this far from that room, I’ll be able to keep this experience in mind. Maybe then I won’t make the same mistakes.”

Stanley doesn’t know. He’s not up for risking it right now. And the fellow doesn’t listen to him much, so he doubts that his prodding would have much effect, not if the narrator is so deeply entranced again.

The voice heaves a sigh again. “Well. It is your choice, in the end. Lord knows I can’t force you.”

The quiet drifts back in. After a long pause, where Stanley wonders if it’s retreated back into the hall, the voice speaks up again.

“Stanley,” it says, very very gently, as though trying not to spook him, “I’m not going to hurt you.”

His reaction startles both of them—he bursts into tears.

It’s just a release of the tension, he thinks distantly, while his body heaves and shakes. He was so unimaginably scared and ashamed, that the final acknowledgement means all that emotion needs an outlet.

Stanley cries. The narrator stumbles over his words.

“Oh, oh damn it all, I’ve made it worse, haven’t I? Stanley, I don’t know what I’m doing! I’m not good at this!”

No, no. It’s okay. He just needs to get it out. This is a thing he needs to do for himself.

“I. Okay.” The fellow clearly doesn’t understand, but he’s trying valiantly to give Stanley what he needs. “I’ll just, wait outside until you’re ready to continue the story.”

Fine. That’s fine.

Stanley lets it all shake out of him. It exhausts him, hollows him out. He comes out the other side feeling cleaner, if a little raw—like fresh skin under the dry peeling sunburn.

“There you go,” the narrator greets when he finally exits the office. “Ready to continue?”

The fellow sounds nervous, though it’s evident he’s working to hide it. Stanley scrubs at his face one more time, then gives a thumbs up.

“Alright.” He clears his throat. “Where were all of his coworkers? Stanley decided to go to the meeting room—perhaps he had simply missed a memo.”

Stanley takes a deep breath.

And then he hops out the window.

“Wh—“

There’s a palpable befuddlement to the voice, but it persists, working to stay on script. Stanley can’t help the sigh of relief.

He needed to be sure. He needed to know he wouldn’t be hurt for disobeying again.

The narrator huffs, strums his guitar, and insults him sternly, but the protagonist gets the sense that he’s just as aware of Stanley’s fears, and just as eager to provide him the proof that, yes, he is going to be okay.

(“I just wanted us to get along.”)

They are going to be okay.