#im so proud of this makeup ngl

[crystalcoatl]

It appears we will have to spend quite a long time in this body, so we have changed into a guise more appropriate for a humanoid emperor.

Hehe, what do you think?

Are you compelled to kneel before us now?

credits under the cut

based on this summer swimsuit ver by @ded-lime

wig @/_hanie.comb ☆ swimsuit @/cloudyskycosplay ☆ photo @/fro_ventures <- all on instagram

colossalcon prime 2024

[a-na-dhil]

time to shine and post my dabihawks cosplay here cause i fucking love it

+ bonus:

[genderqueerdykes]

ngl the whole "transitioning will make you ugly" thing actually brings me a lot of comfort. when i was at my prettiest, skinniest, most gender-conforming, most cishet passing ... i was also at the lowest, most miserable point in my life. now im the fat, ugly, "dykey" looking punk butch trans dude i was always meant to be and im happier than ever. i haven't even medically transitioned yet, but i feel more like myself now pushing 30 than i did for the entirety of my late teen/early adult years. my family hates it but my husband and friends have been crazy supportive and idk. i just feel so alive and comfortable in my skin now that ive been out a while.

in the words of the one and only spongebob: "IM UGLY AND IM PROUD!"

and you know what? that's a perfectly acceptable way to approach that thinking, too!

i actually feel you there LOL. i've always wanted to be the "ugliest" dyke in the room. i've always wanted to be my big, hairy, fat, ugly self. i love that it's difficult for people to be able to gender me because i just cannot fit inside of what their idea of a 'woman' should be. ugly is what falls outside of the look the makeup and film industry tells us people should look like. i don't think that's reflective of what attractive is at all- but it's also good to not care about being attractive. why should that be someone's primary concern in life?

isn't being happier in your own skin more important? and that's exactly what you're doing. who cares about being attractive when being yourself and living your life is more important. glad you took the time to send this in!

[tetskuro]

hi gorgeous! could i be 🎀? your matchups are absolutely adorable and i thought of sending in one for myself because, hey, you're pretty cool and i just wanna see who i'm more compatible w shshsh. i would adore a long, romantic matchup!!! i'm a straight woman (she/her) and i'd love to be matched w a male character!! my ideal type in a guy would be someone who's attentive, and a perfectionist. i always work super hard to look good/stay good and i'd appreciate a person who does the same. i also want someone who stands up for what he thinks and isn't easily influenced yk? i like someone who keeps me on my toes and challenges me and motivates me to work harder. i love love love boys who take an effort on dates. i want a guy who listens to the similar music i do and makes playlists for me (id do the same duh) and writes long ass love letters, just because. i want someone who matches outfits with me and holds my hand in public. someone i can trust with anything and we can just yap at 2 a.m. about the most senseless thing there is on planet earth. bonus points if he looks tall and scary because like...yes.

i'm so sorry i ramble a lot but it's just like...unstoppable, anyways a tiny description of me!! i'm an introvert, even if i do not look the part. it's not like i'm shy, i just don't like keeping up w fake people if you know what i mean. i'm confident about myself and know what i want in life. i'm also pretty sarcastic usually and use humor as a coping mechanism. i usually tend to overwork myself because i want to be the best at everything i do. i also ALWAYS stick up for my friends and don't let anyone walk over me or those who matter to me. i love love love listening to people and offering them advice, it fills me with so much glee that they trust me with things like, i'm always here for u!!! also, i'm not exactly a sunshine nor am i grumpy? it really just depends on whom i'm around. i'm 5'0 feet tall, with brown layered waves and curtain bangs, and almond shaped eyes. i'm pretty fair ngl but super tanned around the arms (i forget sunscreen) and i have an hourglass figure. my hobbies are playing the guitar, doing ballet, watching sappy girly romcoms, doing my makeup, listening to songs, studying (sorry im a nerd), shopping and swimming. i do adore a good thriller novel too. ok, ranking the love languages wld be- 1) quality time (giving n receiving) 2) acts of service (receiving n giving ) 3) words of affirmation (giving n receiving) 4) physical touch (receiving) 5) gifts!! (receiving) sorry chat im too broke n uncreative to give any IM SORRY ILL SMOTHER U W LOVE extra info i saw the previous people give, i'm an intp virgo YAY i love taylor swift and the color pink (im the textbook definition of a girly girl) i adore english literature and have won plenty of international writing awards im so proud of it AND AND AND i think youre very cool and awesome and yeah. inserts bow emoji cause i cant find it. LOVE YOU TAKE CARE STAY HYDRAETD!!!! take ur time bb.

your matchup is...

sakusa kiyoomi

⭑ sakusa is a very attentive person and is always striving to reach perfection

⭑ incredibly detail oriented and doesn't like leaving things unfinished

⭑ you both work super hard and would definitely be able to keep each other on your toes

⭑ he puts a lot of effort into anything he does, so he'd plan out your guys's dates meticulously because he wants to make sure you have a good time

⭑ sakusa also has a tendency to overwork himself so he notices when you're doing the same; that way you'd be able to keep each other in check

⭑ i see quality time and acts of service being sakusa's biggest love languages when it comes to giving

⭑ i feel like the later into the night it is, sakusa would be more likely to indulge in random conversations about anything and everything

⭑ he knows he can always come to you whenever he's in need of any guidance because he trusts you wholeheartedly to listen to him and give advice on important things

⭑ sakusa isn't too big on pda but he would hold your hand while walking around or maybe keep an arm around your waist

⭑ with his dark hair and eyes and height of 6+ ft, sakusa can appear tall and scary to people who don't know him, especially with his mask on

⭑ he'd find your sarcasm amusing and you'd be able to get some chuckles out of him with your humor

⭑ i think he would be a fan of thrillers so he'd love your book recs and finish a novel within a couple of days

⭑ he finds your passion for english literature very admirable and thinks it's so amazing how you've won international writing awards? like that's a huge thing to be proud of

your matchup runner-up is kageyama tobio

[mueritos]

screaming and crying i dropped an ask on like july last year and then left tumblr so cannot see at all what your response was to it (if even responded at all) but it’s so cool to still see your being a very open loud and proud faggalious transmasc, given how many terfs are false reporting openly trans people (specially if they’re that loud and proud about it) i was worried they would’ve stuck down your shit by now anyways, what your thoughts on being mixed? im mixed (black dad, white mom, both latino) and it feels so complicated?? you’re not black enough for black people and you aren’t white enough to get any safety out it. even if you’re white passing (which is an iffy term for me ngl but i understand the point of it so i still use it)

Aw hi there!! I apologize if I never answered it, I have close to 2k unanswered asks in my inbox, so I try to answer what I can with the energy I have. I'm happy you could find safety in my blog from how open I am :)

As for your question, I can say that I'm mixed myself! I can guarantee you that all latines are. I found out last year that I am half indigenous (North American and Central Mexican Native) and half spanish/portuguese. This makes sense due to colonization, of course, but its hard not to know until an actual DNA test of what that makeup is. Even now I still struggle with being okay to call myself indigenous (I have no tribal affiliation due to colonization), and I at the most call myself detribalized. I am often "too mexican" for white spaces, but I am also constantly question why white people about my ethnic/racial status, or about the extent of how "mexican" I am. At the same time, I worry I am not mexican enough even when in mexican spaces, as I am trans/queer/neurodivergent, and this complicates my relationship with my ethnic/racial identities. I, however, have white privilege (I refuse to use "white passing" because what the fuck is that), and I won't ever experience colorism or racism the same way darker skinned latines will.

I think being mixed can bring complicated relationships, especially when it comes to dual identities, whether racially, ethnically, or nationally. It can make you feel like an outsider within your own family, but it can also allow you to see and experience multiple worlds/cultures with a level of intimacy others do not have.

I know other mixed latinos with 2c hair, Black/indigenous features, and latino last names who call themselves "white passing", even though I have paler skin than them! You can use whatever terms you want to describe yourself, but please keep in mind that white folk have taken this term and run off with it, applying to any and every mixed/non-white person just because they look slightly "european".

I think latines have a long way to go in terms of acknowledging race, but colonizer racial castes definitely have their blame in this failure to recognize Blackness and Indigeneity in latine populations. Afro-latino wasn't even recognized in countries like Mexico until a few years ago. I really suggest finding community with people who are mixed like you, who can understand the deep rooted confusion, unlearning, and relearning that being mixed and accepting that mixed identity can bring. Finding community with others will always allow you to feel safer and connected with others.

[choclatecoveredlove]

Hi! If i may heres my ask for the matchup event!My name is Luka and i go by he/they/itAnd for the fandom id like twisted wonderland for my personality im quite outgoing,loud and very hyper i also rant about my hyperfixations very often For hobbies i dance and draw i like cosplaying and rhythm games i dont like when its cold,and getting interrupted ideal date would be a bookstore And extras: im starting to learn how to do makeup!

Ohh a cosplayer! That’s really cool! Enjoy your match up :)

Your match is Riddle!

you two are literally the embodiment of this:

riddle honestly really likes how out going you are! as long as you don’t break any rules he doesn’t care

(he might even let you get away with breaking some rules but shh)

he really likes to watch you dance! he finds it soothing!!

he also adores everything you draw- he’ll hang it up on the dorm fridge like a proud mom

i feel like riddle would honestly be like super good at rhythm games so you two good play together!!

okay but riddles ideal date would also probably be a book store date so yay

you go buy books and then you rest while he reads them to you!!

ngl riddles pretty good at make up himself! so he could probably teach you a trick or two

“Love, would you care to go to the bookstore today? There’s this novel that i’ve had my eye on for a while that id like you to see.”

[youranxiousnerd]

Showtime Thoughts

bc i am in love with julia lester

spoilers below

First off, why is this episode so short?

ngl i forgot mazzara was a regular

ricky ded besties

awww nina and the letters 

she looks very good in her dress

ashlyn and ricky look so good

“We’re screwed!”

ash and ricky are too funny like where were they this season?

chaotic and pretty best friends

sidenote, why did they go see north high’s production? 

oh my god ricky and nina are talking

SEBLOS IN THE BACKGROUND

i am taking what i can get

RICKYS FACE WITH THE CARD!!!!!!!!

my favorite part of the episode

his makeup looks very good

he looks very good

as @organic-guacamole said, he is very pretty

its been like three minutes and it already is so chaotic

yessss kourtney’s mom!!!

so howie and kourt are fine? gah since when?

“look for the shortest fork” mood

I CANNOT TAKE EJ SERIOUSLY HE LOOKS LIKE AN ANGRY BIRD

big bird ej comin at you

oh

PORTWELL DATE

wait isnt this ejs last show? is he going to miss his last afterparty for a date?

true love bitches

GINA MY LOVE

“Is he with us?”

NORTH HIGH SET OUR BEST BOI ANTOINE ON FIRE APS GET READY

seb being a supportive boyfriend is everything i needed

jenny is frazzled

i love how all the techie turned actors are nervous at some point during the episode

REDLYN CONTENT

awww thats so cute love the callback!!!

ooo howie is here

love how the writers leave a cliffhanger and then close the book before it turns to tragedy with one line

mazzara and ej, thats it

jenn what

why is mike there?

that was so unnecessary like aren’t mike and jenn over?

LILY

“did we forget to build a moat around the school” 

let ricky be single challenge

she just said “lol” i cant

props to ricky for keeping calm during the show after he saw mike and jenn

ah so lily is a child of divorce?

“lily scram”

RICKY AFTER THE CURTAIN OPENS WHY IS THIS FUNNY

STOP MAZZARA IS THE VOICE OVER

HE SOUNDS REALLY GOOD

how did ricky do that so fast-

put on gloves over the cast, makeup, and a mask?

i dont work with costumes 

AMERICA EXPLAIN

The one scene we get from the show...

Yay Steph!!!!

“Big Red has not thrown up in twenty minutes” ashlyn’s little smile

“she heard wrong”

someone please explain how spotlighting the judge is a good idea it makes it seem like things went wrong

“Carlos is a seasoned professional” honey carlos is on the verge of a mental breakdown

“He says help

Communication

Seb translating for Carlos is beautiful dramatic, yes, but im right. 

im so proud of them. they go from not talking for a week to seb being able to tell how carlos is feeling based off a stoic expression.

SOULMATE SHIT

IM SORRY NO BOP TO THE TOP CALLBACK

LIKE NONE

WHO WANTS TO RIOT WITH ME?!?!

wait so carlos goes from on the verge of a mental breakdown to full on performing and speaking?!?!?!? Speaking well too, not stumbling.

he looks so comfortable on stage when not even ten minutes ago he looked like he was going to vomit?

h e l p

ashlyn’s little laugh!

NINI IS A FORK IM LAUGHING THIS IS GREAT

big red lookin’ at his girl

ricky what are you doing?

ASHLYN AND GINA

I QUIT THEY’RE ADORABLE

GET IT KOURTNEY

howie’s little mouth drop

i cant with sebs costume i should not be laughing how is he able to do a kick line

ASHLYN MY LOVE

be our guest was enjoyable. it had a lot of moving parts. frankie and dara sounded really good. it’ll probably grow on me the more i listen to it.

is it just me or did be our guest lack some energy?

NATIALIE IS SO AGGRESSIVE

awww gina bb

portwell!!

“my mom sent me jordan fisher”

big red and ricky!!!

...what is big red doing? has he been faking sick?

“PLEASE EVERYONE REMAIN IN THE SAME ROLE YOU STARTED IN” 

BEST LINE OF THE SEASON OMFG 

alright what the hell is up with howie?!?

kourtney is so excited and then downer howie comes to ruin it

nina just write “thanks for being the best bro and glad youre not dead”

btw kourtney and gina look really good in their costumes

ASHLYN!!!!

SHES SO PRETTY THANK YOU

redlyn!!

gina and jamie!!! 

he looks so proud

glad gina gets to see her family!

cute scene, jordan is a nice addition!

RICKY AND THE BOWL

julia lester is killing it with the vocals

big red is so in love

seb bouncing in the costume 

“she’s never looked at me that way before” evil smirk

PORTWELL GLANCES

my heart fricking stopped when carlos went on stage 

being early on your cue/missing is awful would highly not recommend

a bop to the top callback after this would have been perfect

those harmonies!!

THEYRE SO IN LOVE

ummm phone call?

CHIPS BIG SCENE

...why wasn’t seb cogsworth? 

alright that was really good. everyone (even the backup) sounded really good. portwell rights! ashlyn rights! kowie rights! acting rights! 

so mazzara and jamie?

Ashlyn is the perfect Belle fight me

“Eat it Zackey Roy!” how about “yay kiddos, nice job!”

ej’s little dance

“bc you’re ginas brother” 

he is enamored by her it is adorable

EJ CASWELL RIGHTS

“hey, jordan fisher, would you like to f up one of three stableish ships in hsmtmts?” “sure, im in!”

ej!!!

aww hopefully he doesnt take the conversation too heart. they both like each other so much.

Portwell is so enjoyable to watch.

return of the bro

ej go get your girl dont worry about her brother please

SOMEONE TOUCHED THE PROPS

all hands on deck

“Can you just jump off something high”

I seem to remember Ricky falling from something high last episode, is that correct? 

She tells this to one of her most UNSTABLE kids

Oh shit

Miss. Jenn

Wtf

like what the actually hell

look at the kids faces they’re heartbroken

Miss. Jenn why. You’re stressed about the show, but you’re not performing it. They are. They have to worry about lines and cues and pitches, not you. Miss. Jenn has literally gone at the kids this season. Opening night speech too Ash and Ricky, shutting Seb down, that comment. She has become obsessed with the Menkies and North High. It has gotten really bad. These kids have put everything into this show, even their relationships (both platonic and romantic) and that is how you repay them? 

I didn’t think they would address this, I lost hope after last week but I am so glad they’re going too.

Someone send Seb after Miss. Jenn please, let him rip into her, he would do very well.

Miss. Jenn is supposed to be the role model and she just told a kid to jump off something high.

nina has been a godsend this episode, props to her!

haven’t been the biggest nini fan this season (off and on for me), but she was very behaved this episode. 

if there is anything the east high kids are good at, it’s bullshitting their way out.

“aim for my face” character growth

I KNEW IT

LILY WHY HOW WHEN WHY 

WTF THEY END THERE I CANNOT WITH CLIFF HANGERS

I liked the episode. Didn’t love it, but liked it. I really wish we got to see more acting, like we didn’t even see Big Red and E.J go on stage. Not even the iconic yellow dress. Some of the drama is so unnecessary, like why Mike and Jenn? What is with the Kourtney and Howie drama the writers insist on having, can’t they just be happy?

Besides the whole harness incident (burn that harness and mask it is causing so many problems) the production went very well, too well. This is East High we’re talking about.

Promo thoughts because what

oo they’re sneaking, maybe Big Red’s thingy

YES ASHLYN GETTING THE LOVE SHE DESERVES

oo Kowie confession?

portwell please be okay

what is up with carlos’ hair?

so seb, miss. jenn, and carlos scene? this has the potential to be very beautiful.

“It’s not over” not this again... 

i’m thinking carlos and seb are going to talk to miss jenn.

Sidenote, if we do not get a good seblos scene I will riot.

Hopefully Miss. Jenn apologizes with a billion sorrys

rini you just broke up please dont get back together 

im scared

if it is a scene where they close the book i will be very happy

Are we getting a flash forward scene? I’m pretty sure Miss. Jenn said Menkies aren’t till two plus weeks after the show.

We know based off the promo pics Ej and Gina are at the cast party, what went wrong?

Wait do we not get to see the finale of the show?

We better see the goddamn transformation

how does lily home and core four song fit in? im more curious about the lily one.

In conclusion, I am not ready for this to be over and the transformation needs to be sent to hell.

[perhapsthanatos]

10:32 pm with yuta ♡

nct’s yuta x fem!reader (got inspired by a dream of mine & found the idea really cute)

alternate title: be the james dean to my audrey hepburn

genre: fluff. a pinch of angst. non idol au. badboy!yuta au.

word count: 1400~

playlist: chinatown by wild nothing, lover’s rock by tv girl & work this time by king gizzard and the lizard wizard.

warnings: featuring johnny (not a warning though). smoking cigarettes. cursing. lowercase intended. not proofread.

a/n: hi i was supposed to post a vampire!haechan fic but i really wasnt happy w it in general :( the plot or overall idea of the fic was really good, but i just felt as if i didnt do it justice so here we are :( but ngl, i kind of like this concept more? maybe bc i can see it more vividly? idk, i feel like my writings r getting repetitive & its getting on my nerves lmaoo this is getting long im sorry do u guys even read this part anyway? i would also like to apologize abt the amount of projecting im doing lmao ive been having some rough days & i love my sister but hate being compared to her so often so this is a way for me to rant abt it ig? also so sorry its coming out a little later bc i woke up late today (& procrastinated for the rest of it so here i am posting really late at night) & decided to go to the convenience store to get ice cream (& a ton of other bad shit pls dont do this its rlly unhealthy) for breakfast bc i can :) any who, enjoy lovelies <3

“oh my, y/n! you’ve grown up so well! just like your sister!”

“oh! i’m sorry i’ve almost mistaken you for your sister! y/n is your name, correct?”

“y/n, darling, you are looking so dashing! you really do resemble your sister, don’t you?”

“ah, you must be y/n! i’ve heard all about you and your sister from your father!”

you swear that your reddening cheeks are threatening to fall off any moment now from all the fake smiling. the hundreds of superficial compliments, the insincere flattery and the need for these people to constantly compare you to your godforsaken sister makes you feel even weaker than you are. it gets harder and harder to keep up with a big persona that isn’t at all you. as lucky as you are to live such a lavish lifestyle, you can’t help but hate how your family has to be so perfect. you hate how you have never fit in with them, even if you are so good at faking it. you hate how you have always been stuck in your sister’s shadow, constantly haunted with the reminder that you yourself aren’t good enough. you hate how you now have to entertain the rich and brainless guests at your parent’s gala because she’s gone for some stupid prodigy competition and everyone is only talking about her in front of your face. so what if she’s better the better sister? you still have the right to earn respect, right?

you’re exhausted from all the small talk. your facade gets more brittle by the second under all the pressure. your body feels as if it's gonna give out due to your brain shutting down after all that interacting. you try to keep on going with the night as it unravels itself by being the perfectly poised poster child, trying to make your parents proud. but alive yet almost completely devoid, you decide enough was enough. what if you left right now? no one would notice, would they?

after pulling up your phone discreetly to send a few text messages, you pass through lots of people dressed in gold and finery in a way that wouldn’t have you noticed right away. keep your head down and don’t you dare make eye contact with anyone. nearing the end of the room, grabbing the first glass of whatever alcohol you see and downing it in one gulp, you start walking away as quickly as possible from the ballroom. “ignorant privileged fucks,” you angrily whisper to no one in particular, setting the now empty glass on whatever surface and begin to head to the main exit where no one could spot you running away.

“and what do you think you’re doing here, miss?”

a voice interrupts you, looking up you see that it is your father’s head butler; johnny. he is dressed in a simple black suit that makes him appear taller than he is. his long brown hair is slicked back and his bowtie seems brand new. you have known the man since he started working in your household less than ten years back. you were a reckless child, often trying to find ways to sneak out, finding a way to escape from this life and he sympathized with you. after all, he could barely imagine living your life, never catching a break for yourself and always pretending to be someone you weren’t. he often helped planning when you would sneak out into the night, scheduling things like what time you should leave and what time you should be back, more specifically a time when no one would notice. he would take care of your form of transportation and have your location on at all times, just to be extra safe. as much as he wants you to have fun and have a bit of freedom, he still worries that something might happen to you. because of all this, you two have grown to have a very strong bond. you could confidently say that he is most definitely a parental figure in your life since your parents (and even your sister) are often overseas for work.

“what do you think i’m doing? you think i wanna be in a room with those half-baked bipeds? fuck no!”

“i know, i was just joking. you looked like you were about to explode in there, i wish i could help.” he laughs, pulling out his phone preparing what you might need. “so what will it be for today? the driver? we just need to pay him to keep his mouth shut. a taxi? it’s cheaper than paying the driver, but you still need to pay… not like that’s a problem for you though. maybe an uber would be good enough—“

“actually, i got myself covered. thanks.”

his jaw slightly drops and his eyebrows furrow. he looks straight at you in shock. “what do you mean you got yourself covered?”

you look down at your feet, a nervous habit. “i got myself a ride, you don’t need to help me. i’ll be back as soon as dawn comes.”

he raises his eyebrow. “who’s your ride?”

“doesn’t matter,” you glance down at your phone seeing a notification and wave a goodbye, leaving rather suddenly. “i gotta go, i’ll text you when you need to open the gates!”

“y/n! wait! who’s your ride— and she’s gone.” johnny sighs, watching as you run towards the front gates, tossing your stiletto heels away on the grass while you’re at it. he heads back inside, silently hoping you’ll be fine.

knocking the window of the old black mustang parked outside behind the big bushes, the driver rolls down his window and sends the most charming smile.

yuta in his black beanie, long blonde hair, worn out doc martens, signature leather jacket and black skinny jeans. it almost makes you laugh on how he wears the same thing almost everyday but still manages to look so good.

he is most notable for having a big bad boy reputation and you knew that he was the breath of fresh air you needed in your life. a person who can understand having the pressure of having to be or to fulfill your persona. a person you can completely be yourself around. a person who is full of warmth no matter how cold he may seem on the outside.

“get in, princess.”

and that was all you needed. you tiredly walked to the other door and sat yourself in the car. rolling his window back up, he looks at you. you are wearing a simple yet stunning black dress along with silver jewelry adorned on your neck and wrists. your makeup is perfectly done but still struggles to hide the fog in your eyes. he has the sudden urge to clear them away. he softens at the sight of you. no one is perfect, but he finds you being perfect enough without ever having to dress up.

“where to?” he asks as gently as he could. he knows that you are most vulnerable during these moments and that it is hard to finally break down your walls after a day full of stress, so he doesn’t pry immediately. all he wants to do is to keep you here, safe and away from your burdens and for you to stay comfortable with him, even if it couldn't be for long. but is that too selfish of him to ask? he hates how you hate your life and it is taking every bone in his body to not run away with you. but who is he to tell you what to do or what to change anyway? all he can do for now is try to find a way to make you genuinely smile.

“take me anywhere,” you whisper to the latter. “i just want to be as far from myself and my life as possible. miles away or the nearest convenience store, just take the long way home before dawn.”

you look down at the cup holders, spotting an open cigarette box. you tug one out of the nineteen and light it with the lighter you kept in your pocket. you lean back and close your eyes. he only admires as you bring the cigarette to your lips, exhaling a cloud of smoke afterwards. letting the radio play quietly, he starts the car and begins to drive away from the mansion. he can’t help but wonder how you (an elegant daughter) and him (a bad boy) are millions of worlds apart, but more similar than you think.

© perhapsthanatos (efa)

[organic-guacamole]

showtime

episode 211 let's go

ok first of all, this is the second to last episode guys... I don't even wanna think about how much pain I'll be in after next week's episode

mr mazzara doing the recap-

this is so weird to me and I don't know why

WHY DIDN'T YALL JUST ASK BENJAMIN FOR HELP, THATS LITERALLY HIS THING

is Nini giving out the cards a callback to season 1 when Natalie Bagley said that Nini gave her a card or something on opening night of another musical?

STEPHY AS THE ENCHANTRESS OMG YES

Ricky in the crown gives me Harry styles in that photoshoot vibes

he's so pretty.

ok but why did we never see Ricky and Ashlyn interact before? it's been like 5 seconds and I already love how they bounce off each other and it's just so natural

OH THEY REALLY DON'T HAVE ANY UNDERSTUDIES-

well that explains a lot...

so Ricky fell on top of Ashlyn and all that broke for both of them was their wrist-

insert Jake Peralta *coolcoolcoolcoolcoolcool no doubt no doubt no doubt*

of course howie was amazing as the beast, were we expecting anything less??

Ricky is so beautiful and I will not shut up about it....

let me enjoy this before the makeup crew slaps mud on his face.

Nini and Ricky talking to eachother? in a civil manner? wasn't she avoiding him just in the last episode? hm ok

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH THEY CANT EXPRESS THEIR FEELINGS JUST LIKE ME HAHAHAHAHA THIS IS HILARIOUS, WHATS NEXT? THEY CUT EVERYONE OFF CUZ THEY CANT HANDLE EMOTIONS? ...ha

yes Kaden and Rico, my favourite east high boys 🥰

I mean....where's EJ?

THERE HE IS

EJ AND GINA IN THE BACKGROUND... doing something idek

KOURTNEY'S MOM IS BACK YAY

Howie is a shining star, ofc ofc

the smallest fOrk

can't wait to see the fork burst into song about how she deserves more than to be used to eat salad😌

the duster and the bluster.... ok😃

hi Gina!

hi- oh wow I didn't know Robbie Rotten was in this show!!!!!

the portwell look.

that my friends, is a married couple's look✋

GOSH EJ WHAT DID THEY DO TO YOU

aww Gina's so excited for this

D word?

Die?

Delicious?

Dom Toretto?

"good, clean fun all alone with someone I dig...a lot"

sir that does not sound very clean to me

SEBLOS

Seb looks so cute standing there next to pope Carlos

DID THEYEY REALLY LIGHT ANTOINE ON FIRE-

I NEED TO SEE THAT

Seb's reading Carlos better than big red read the script in episode 102, this is great development after the "fight"

Kourtney really just made the best outfit for herself and let the rest of them suffer

the way Gina immediately goes to hold on to EJ after the announcement

"tonight we're going to put the U in UTAH"

...

"hey where are you from?"

"TAH"

SEB'S SINGULAR CLAP KILLED ME-

he's officially salt lake city's resident thanos

just wity clapping because for some reason I have a feeling he doesn't know how to snap his fingers...don't ask why

Ms Jenn do you mind encouraging your leads before the show? idk just an idea

pepto bismol product placement smhsmh

those flowers are bigger that big red himself-

*bops along to the opening theme*

that whistle at the end slaps everytime

WHY IS THE AUDIENCE SO MASSIVE

I guess they're all here to see Ms Jenn go on as a fork after Nini decides to *go her own way*

wow i am so funny

so they couldn't do many group scenes cuz of covid, but this 300 person crowd is cool? nice

OO THE VIOLIN GIRL FROM EPISODE 6 IS IN THE ORCHESTRA

HOWIEEEEEE

"Mr Caswell", he said, in the loudest voice possible while backstage at a show that's about to start.

Mazzara what are you trying to pull-

I usually like Benjamin but I don't like his tone

"iS yOuR wHoLe FaMiLy HeRe?" LIKE YOU DON'T ALREADY KNOW THATS A SOFT SPOT FOR EJ

"we've had some good conversations these past few weeks"

right so what's going to happen after you graduate?

what does he think of you not going to Duke?

what did he say about you giving the sweatshirt that's been in the family for 3 generations to a girl you're not even dating?

good old Mr. M

therapist Mr. Mazzara, they all need it.

start with Ricky though.

"Michael Bowen"

dude why did you shave, now you look less like "hot lumberjack" and more "creep at the gas station"

OH-

does she not like Mike anymore?

why does it sound like jennzzara started dating and now they just sit back and talk smack about everyone in their freetime

break the fourth wall-

uhhhh im scared

why am I scared

he's scary

hehe flowers for Ricky, obviously for Ricky, ObViOuSLY

oh boy poor Michael

this man is in love, rip

why does Ms Jenn always look at people with her eyes open so wide

LILYYYY

I'm only excited because I really like the idea of lily and Ricky being friends, nothing more.

ha this guy's got jokes

a MOAT AROUND THE SCHOOL

wheeze

also he's very pretty.

"the wolves and very talented humans"

how dare he forget to mention the very talented wolves and normal humans, smh erasure

"being nice, what a concept" ted talk by Lily who still doesn't have a last name

did she just say lol out loud

same with the hug emoji last episode-

go touch some grass babes

the way he didn't say no, but said he didn't know how the east high kids would react-

not saying he does want to date her but that's an interesting thing to think about, also another thing to write an essay analysis on just to leave it in my drafts for a few months

awww lily genuinely trying to help him

sorry guys, I've been taken by the Lily charm (didn't know it existed until now but oh well)

REMEMBER WHEN I SAID I'LL NEVER SHIP PORTWELL?

just look at me now

the Lily wink I can't she's so cute-

HELP ME I'M BEING HELD HOSTAGE BY LIL-

David Attenborough?

oh nvm it's Benjamin narrating the show in a really weird British accent for some reason.

STEPHY GOT MORE LINES YAY GOOD FOR HER

also is this to show that Nini doesn't care about being the star of the show anymore? the way she's supporting everyone else even though she's a fork?

I would pay for a special of the full musical ngl

OOO THE TRANSFORMATION WAS SMOOTH

shockingly

yo where did the makeup come from

man I wish I was a theatre kid

THIS IS STEPHY'S EPISODE NOW IDC✋

my girl is starring

"needs an X-factor"

Simon Cowbell creeps in

"it's a yes from me"

and them boom, he takes Nini and mistreats her horribly and then she comes back to theatre after deciding music isn't for her👍

"I thought she just hog-tied him?"

don't ask sebby, it's better if you don't know.

imagine they spotlight the wrong person and this dude is just some random person that likes writing down stuff during shows.

Ms Jenn just let them do what they rehearsed (at some point we never saw) or else this is gonna end horribly wrong

"help"

same Carlos, same

I love how seb is just his translator rn

I thought he said "great displeasure" instead of "greatest pleasure"....help?

big red coming out from throwing up to see his girlfriend star is the cutest thing in this show.

Ash and Gina dancing is so fun

I'm imagining them practicing at night at their home, watching the movie for the 100th time and making sure their one dance together is perfect

KOURTNEY YES

HOWIE IS IN LOVE AHHHH

I LOVE HOWIE SO MUCH

SEBBY

THIS SCENE HAS SO MUCH GOING ON I CAN'T KEEP UP

THIS IS SO GOOD

HOW???

no because I'm actually crying

I'm dead serious.

we need this musical released as a special

big red is so proud and I love to see it

Natalie: "if you do not by at least 20 dollars in concessions, you do not support art"

rando in the audience: "but I pay for ad free Spotify"

Mr Mazzara clapping in the distance

Gigi, the guy you like is talking to you, complimenting you and hyping you up

YOU LUCKY LITTLE FEATHER DUSTER

aw EJ teasing her about the chocolates in a way that doesn't make her feel bad? take notes Richard

JORDAN FISHER

there is no rest of the show idc Jordan is it for me

THE WIG CAP ON RICKY OMG

they look like they're high and having "deep" conversations on the floor

THE MEAN GIRL WITH THE EYES-

@sunshine-julie-molina YOU HEAR THAT

Natalie really just be coming for them all

Howie what is happening rn

I'm scared

"did you enjoy it"

"very much"

dude wants a kiss so bad

ASHLYN OMG

NO DON'T DO IT BECAUSE OF LILY, PUT YOUR OWN TWIST ON IT

I want a Jordan autograph please

just keep swim- oh pushing...

Gina is literally a giant next to him and I live for it

am I about to cry for the 3rd time in this episode?

yes.

Ricky's leg kicks under the table makes me so happy aw

the portwell glances will kill me.

ah yes, mashed potato snow

Mr. M.... I'm not a theatre kid but even I know you can't have your phone on backstage.

Howie please just do it

CHIP'S BIG LINE I CANT

I LITERALLY HAD TO PAUSE IT AMD SCREAM INTO MY MASK FOR A SOLID 2 MINUTES (I'm not at home rn) HES SO CUTE

oh ok bye Jordan

oo tea

NOT HIM BEING STARSTRUCK BECAUSE HE'S MEETING HIS FUTURE BROTHER IN LAW-

"we're all just glad Gigi has a big brother figure in her life"

excuse me for a few thousand hours while I laugh hysterically

THE CAMERA ZOOM ON EJS FACE AND EVERYTHING-

STOP EJ LOOKS LIKE HE'S GONNA CRY BUT I CAN'T TAKE HIM SERIOUSLY WITH THE STAGE MAKE-UP

someone else said this already but I think it's hilarious that they had to bring in 2 guest characters to create some portwell angst

omg this really is Cici's episode, found family is their thing

elevator music lol

I'm gonna bet that big red took the harness for his surprise for Ashlyn without realising what it was

did Ms. Jenn just....tell her most mentally unstable student....to commit suicide....on a disney show...was that....I'm very....well....what the actual-

oh and there she goes running off instead of trying to make it right

oh wow Nini's the hero, she's gonna save the show 🤩

😐

the judge is doing a sudoku

honestly if I went to the hsm show as well, I'd come prepared for this one too

Lily why are you looking like that-

I WAS JUST STARTING TO LIKE YOU DON'T MESS THIS UP

wow ok, there goes that.

omg

what if Howie was acting weird because he knew what Lily did and wanted to tell Kourtbut Lily threatened him so he was scared to-

anyways see y'all clowns next week when we all simultaneously lose all motivation for the week without Fridays to look forward to.

[lonely-teddy-bear]

The Alpha’s Weak Mate h.s au (ch.5)

A/n: Tbh im proud of this chapter ngl. Hope you enjoy and go support it in wattpad as well! it would mean a lot to me :)

word count: 3k

~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~_~

Chapter Five

I woke up to the sound of the blinds being opened, feeling the bright light coming into the room. I turned around to hide my face from the sun and buried my face in my pillow, "oh my gosh Kyle close the blinds!" I whined out.

I didn't hear a complain come from Kyle which was weird considering how much he talks. I opened my eyes again and turned around to look why Kyle wasn't talking, I squinted from the bright light hitting my face and saw a shadow but it wasn't Kyle's because this one was short.

"Sorry but my name is Mia not Kyle." I sat up, startled. I had forgotten where I was and what happened last night. Wait didn't I lock the door?

"Sorry but how did you get in? I had the door locked." She walked to where she would stand in front of the bed.

"I have a key, every maid and butler has a key to this house," I just stared at her, did that mean Harry also had a key?

"Does Harry have a key as well?" She didn't say anything but nodded but that was all I needed to know, he could have walked in into his room without me knowing but I don't think he did.

"Do you need anything else?" I let her know I was fine and before she left she let me know that breakfast will be brought up soon.

After she left I stretched as much as I could before getting out of bed and heading towards the bathroom to freshen up before I came face to face with another person. Entering into the giant room I went to do my business before going over to wash my face and mouth. After brushing my mouth I looked at myself and saw how tired I was. It might have to do with the fact that I woke up sometimes at night from a nightmare and then proceeded to cry because I didn't have Kyle to hold me while he rocked me back and forth in order to calm me.

After my parents past away in the rogue attack I had started to have nightmares and Kyle had been the one to be there for me ever since, also along with having anxiety attack after the nightmares it was nice to have someone I cared about there for me. Except last night when I didn't have Kyle, not even Harry at least, I just wish I had someone there with me last night to tell me that I was going to be okay. I swear I had the longest anxiety last night, it felt like the on I first got when I got notified about my parents, about them being killed, Kyle was there to help but he didn't what to do back then, not like now.

After finishing up with my morning routine I went over to the closet that was in the bathroom, next to Harry's. Well it was in the same closet considering how big his closet was.

I might have taken the rest of the closet but where else would I put my clothes? Besides, he wouldn't mind I'm sure, I am after all his mate as much as I hate to admit it.

I didn't bother getting all dressed up, I had grabbed some pair of sweatpants and a red crop top that I use when I don't plan to go out. After changing I went over to the sink and grabbed the bag that held my makeup and pulled out the concealer. I made myself look less dead and less hideous with adding some eyeliner and mascara and then ven some contour so I didn't look too dead after the concealer. Sometimes I wished my skin was more clear but of course one can't have everything.

I headed out to the room, ignoring my hair as I didn't care as much for it and saw that there was a tray with breakfast on it. I heated over to the bed and sat down and saw that there was a paper next to the plate.

We're going out for lunch. Come to my office by 2. Don't be late. -H

Lovely.

Was this his way to make me feel better or was he going. to try and torture me?

Either way I can't ignore him for long since he is the alpha and my mate, he will eventually come for me and make me do something.

After finishing breakfast time somehow went by fast. With not doing anything and reading some random book Harry had laying around that had notes and a bookmark. Can't imagine him writing notes on some book, let alone reading one.

I didn't bother changing before going down to his office earlier than I was told. I just hope it doesn't bother him that I'm going earlier.

After a couple of minutes of walking I managed to get down to the main floor. I was out of breath from all the stairs and why the hell why his room so far away? I'll probably be using that as my work out because there is no way in hell that I will go work out with others if I get told to.

I looked around when I got to the main floor but I didn't see any other doors unless I have to walk into the other halls that are on the sides.

The maid that was walking past must have seen me looking confused asked if I needed help.

"Yes Har- I mean the alpha wanted me to meet him in his office but I don't know where it is..." she caught on to what my question was and directed me to follow her. "He is currently with his beta, if you would like to wait for a couple of minutes until he calls you in."

I nodded at her and thanked her before she left and went on to do what ever she was going to do.

I leaned myself on the wall that was across from the door of his office and waited. I didn't know what time it was but I had left with ten minutes to spare and I hope that with the long walk and me being lost for a minute didn't make me lose time. I really which I had my watch with me but I guess Kyle kept it because it was no where to be found in my belongings.

I was just staring at the door waiting for it to open up which it did but a girl came out looking flushed. I saw Harry looking a little pissed off but I couldn't help but to keep looking at the girl that came out of his office. Didn't the maid say that he was talking to the beta? Unless she was the beta but last time I heard no woman could be in power unless t was the luna or the wife of the beta...

"You're late Dominique," I jumped away from the wall and looked away from the girl which was now gone and looked to the opening in front of me to see Harry leaning on his desk, staring at me. He didn't look to happy.

I walked in towards his office and closed the door behind me. I was scared to look Harry in the eyes, something about him made me feel nervous and scared but I shouldn't because he is the one that I'm going to spend the rest of my life with.

"Sorry I didn't mean to be late. I got lost and your maid said you were with the beta..." I wanted to ask him if the girl was the beta but I just hope he would catch on and give me the answer without me asking.

"I was with my beta, you saw her walk out. Surprised?" I looked up at him and saw he had an amused look on his face. He looked cocky as if he knew that I wanted to know about who the mysterious girl was.

I couldn't help but to gulp and take a deep breath before answering him. Gosh he made me nervous, was it hot in here or was I just sweating from nervousness?

"I didn't think woman were able to have a title unless it was the luna or the wife of someone with a title." I looked away from him but then looked back at him again and saw him looking down at my hands, which I was messing with my nails with, might have to get a manicure after this.

"Do I make you nervous?"

Yes.

"No. Why would you think that?" Why was I acting all dumb? He obviously knows that I was nervous just by the way I was playing with my fingers and messing around with my nails.

"I could hear your heart raise the closer you got and you have been playing with your finger since arriving here. And to your respond to having woman in power? I don't discriminate or follow other people's rules, she is the daughter of the Beta and so she is the rightful owner of the position. That won't be a problem right?" I quickly shook my head.

"No I don't I was just wondering, I don't mind it for a woman to have a title, I think it's cool and encouraging." He stared at me, moving his head to the side to look at me better, he then smirked.

"We're you jealous?"

What? Wait did he really think I was jealous? What made him think I was jealous?

"No... why would you think that?"

He shrugged at me, his smirk being gone.

"I mean you were told I was with the beta and you expected a male to leave my office but instead a woman left my office... and you questioned it without having to ask me. That made me think you were jealous which I don't mind really, because if it was the other way around I would have probably killed him."

I was speechless. I wouldn't say I didn't believe him because I did, just by looking at him I could tell he was serious. I couldn't help but to look away and look down to where I was still messing with my nails, now having skin pulled off.

I saw him from the top of my eyes that he moved away from his desk and saw his black shoes right in front of mine. I felt his folded pointer finger under my chin, making me look up at him. I couldn't help but to notice how green his eyes were. I must have not paid much attention to them since I have been scared to even look his way.

"Next time don't walk away from me and lock the door on me, got it?" I didn't know how to respond and without me thinking I said the one thing that would get me killed anywhere.

"And if I do it again?" I raised my eyebrow at him but quickly slapped my hand over my mouth and looked at him with wide eyes, in shock.

I saw him raise his right eyebrow and I swear his green eyes got darker. That wasn't a good sign. Maybe I shouldn't have said anything, maybe I should have thought first but I can't seem to do that around him.

"Oh princess you don't want to do it again, unless you want to be punished," he looked at me with his dark eyes and his smirk that was giving me bad vibes.

He raised his right hand and placed it on my cheek and slowly moved it over to my ear where he would rank his fingers through my messy hair. He held his hand in place and leaned forward towards my other ear where his hand wasn't in place.

"You should do your hair next time, unless you want me to mess it up more for you," I shivered at the air that hit my ear when he whispered. I felt his lips turn into a smirk but felt him move away to look back at my eyes again.

"So what do we say about going for lunch?"

************

We went out to the town, to the one where I used to go to for work. I didn't know if I was going to see anyone from my pack, let alone Kyle. I wouldn't have mind it if I saw Kyle but if Harry saw him and saw me looking at him, he would be dead. I just wished he could understand but I knew better than that.

We ended up going to this diner that gave off the fifty century, the silver, the red and the white around. We sat on a booth and ordered. I went with a chocolate with banana milkshake and a burger with fries since this place was well know for the burgers. Harry ordered the same but with a strawberry milkshake which surprised me and I think he saw it on my face.

"What?" I couldn't help but to let out a giggle. A giggle? Who am I now?

"Nothing I wasn't expecting you to get a strawberry milkshake," I shrugged and looked out the window. I felt his stare on my right side of my face. I wanted to turn and look at him but stopped myself from doing so.

"What did you think I was going to get? Vanilla milkshake?" I looked back at him and shrugged and nodded. He chuckled, shaking his head and slightly closing his eyes in disbelief.

"Honey, I'm no fan of vanilla," he smirked at me and leaned over the table, crossing his arms on the table. He was looking at me  strangely, there was this teasing look combined with lust in them.

My eyes suddenly widened at the realization of his double meaning. I couldn't help but to look at him in shock and look away from him.

I couldn't believe he said that in a way that it sounded normal. I may have been slow to understand it but I felt my face get hot the minute I figured it out. "Why are you blushing? I just said I didn't like vanilla." I looked at him and saw how he was still smirking at me. He had this cocky look him face, in that handsome face of his. I shook my head lightly trying to not think of him any way.

"I know there's a double meaning to it," I mumbled but didn't look away from him. Something about looking at him in the eyes while he was on that position made me want to look at him more. He was just addicting to look at.

"Mhm is that so?" He cocked his head to his right, his smile getting wider.

The waiter came by to leave us our milkshake and let us know that our food would be out in a couple of minutes. I looked away from looking at Harry to look at the waitress to thank her but looked back to Harry once she was gone. He was still looking at me but he was drinking from his milkshake. I looked down at my milkshake shyly looking away from him.

The cherry on top of the drink caught my attention. I grabbed it and put it in my mouth without thinking anything of it. I moaned lightly enjoying the flavor of the cherry in my mouth. It had been a while since I had a cherry, let alone a milkshake.

I felt a kick under the table causing me to look up at Harry. He has holding out a cherry, holding the stem with his thumb and pointer finger and wiggled it a bit.

"Want it pup?" I blushed at the nickname. I hated it so much but it seemed like he was t going to stop calling me that even if I kept telling him too.

I went to grab the cherry thinking how nice it was of him to offer his cherry but he pulled it back slightly, shaking. his head.

"Nope, you come here and take it from me. With your mouth." I looked at him wide eyed. He can't be serious right? He couldn't be.

I looked around the diner but looked back at Harry when he spoke.

"No one is going to look. Now come one get the cherry. I mean, you do want it, right?"

Did I really like cherry's that much that I would do something like this to get it?

I let out a sigh and looked at the cherry and then at him. He raised at eyebrow in a quick motion and then signaled me to get the cherry. I got up slightly and leaned over on the table and went to grab the cherry.

I saw Harry lean forward to were my ear was. "look at me when you get the cherry." My eyes couldn't get any wider but my body heat could. He had moved back to his place and looked at me with a smirk. That stupid smirk is getting annoying by now. I leaned up to the cherry and didn't look away from his eyes. I felt the cherry hit my lips, I grabbed the cherry with teeth making sure it was all in before i closed my lips around it. I then pulled on the cherry causing it to rip off from the stem.

I quickly sat back down and looked down at my milkshake chewing on the cherry ignoring the heat on my face.

"Aren't you an innocent pup? But you were right. I don't like vanilla either way." I didn't have to look up because I knew there was going to be a smirk on his stupid beautiful face.

[smutty-ki113r]

well yes it was heavenly and I am pure- ok that's a lie lmao. dude I had sex irl once and that's it lmao so i also got barely any sexual interaction.

ofc I love educating ppl on polyamory :> dude I love lj too, i barely interact with him tho but if we do he always compliments my outfits and stuff...he's so charming (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ) and u know I am obsessed with him cuz I love clowns!! I would love to meet candypop but as I said before...I am not sure if he's ever there. yoooo also I met jason and helen for the first time yesterday. they r so nice but pretty weird (not that the others aren't lmao)

I don't know if I said this already but in my dr they all live in this abandoned village?? it's like multiple houses that r pretty trashy ngl. but daddy slendy renovated them by manipulating some ppl lmao

so I read a lil thingy on the webs abt all the attributes of scorpios and u r right. almost everything is accurate wth

DUDE U R SO PRETTY WHAT?? those pictures oml I am drooling. u r really testing me rn. what if i just snatch u? ben would be mad i am sure (* ￣︿￣)

I am also super forgetfull, so I get the struggle, and I blame myself for every problem ppl I like have...even if it's not my fault. for example my best friends cat dissapeared and I keep blaming myself..idk why it can't be my fault but I keep telling myself it is.

DUDE IF BEN IS EVER MEAN TO U ONCE U SWITCH I"LL KICK HIM IN HIS BALLS!!!! COME INTO MY ARMS <3 ILY BBY

I already like blue :> they seem nice and funny just like u

-🃏

IM PURE BUT NOT IN THE MIND. As you can tell. OML tell us about your interaction with Helen and Jason PLZ! Fuck I wanna get into clowns so bad, like especially makeup, I think it’s so cool.

I wanna sex Ben up so bad.

DADDY SLENDY WHATTT HAHAHAGAG. Yep a lot of times zodiacs are very accurate!!

You wanna snatch me?!!! Me?!! Ben would be angry?? I wanna put a tehehe emoji but I can’t find one so I guess they are these.. 😵🤤☺️☺️. DONT TELL ME HOW HE LIKES ME CAUSE THEN IMMA START SAYING “yeah he really is gonna be disappointed” or “he’s just gonna stop liking me eventualky”. I’m just kidding sort of. Please tell me more. I’m not scared that he’ll be mean to me, more just that he will get bored or think I’m annoying.

You’re totally right. You cannot be at fault for everything. It’s literally impossible. Plus, the fact that you do think like that shows you’ve been gaslighted so many times and people have victimized themselves so much around you that now you internalize it.

But I’m proud of you. So so proud

[slugmouth]

ngl anytime I’m this happy I worry I’m getting hypomanic??

honestly I feel like I could be because I got like 6 hours of sleep (not enough for me, which can trigger my hypomanic episodes) but I have all this energy I feel like I’m gonna jump outta my body if I don’t do something!!!! I feel entirely confident about my body, I love it, I’m texting all these people, I feel motivated to clean and take care of things.. I just had a really bad breakdown like two nights ago and now I’m on top of the world. I’m so in love with my bf and filled with so much love for him and my cat and everyone honestly!!! I feel like the world isn’t too awful and usually I feel like it sucks. I even felt like doing my makeup for funsies and I’ve been singing and dancing around my house. Im just feeling really optimistic and grateful and I’m liking being alone (not lonely?!) altho I’m super excited to see my bf later :) I’m actually pretty content with the life I’ve built for myself and the progress I’m making in therapy even if I can’t always see it. I feel proud of myself and my accomplishments??

this is all so uncharacteristic of me lmao maybe I’m just having a good day? but honestly I think I’m hypomanic lol which isn’t bad honestly because I get all this shit done and I feel so good and happy and it’s nice to feel that sometimes but it’s always followed by a crash into depression a few days later which isn’t that good lol but I’ve been down for so long I just feel giddy with excitement to be feeling good 🥺😄

[haojun]

All Yours Final Thoughts & Song Ranking <3

Work has kept me busy so pls ignore how late this is ok? ok thx. Teehee she's Very Long so i added a cut... let me know if we share any opinions or if u wanna share ur own thoughts... my ask box is always open and i love a good ask abt the boys...

Dear my universe - very soft and feels like a welcome home hug :') I genuinely love that the album starts with a song like this... im very full of love for miss dear my universe (((((tinie bit of rocky vocals do help boost her up the ranks))))) [ #6 ]

Butterfly Effect - do not TOUCH ME i love this song SO MUCH i actually replayed her three times in a row on my first listen through of the album :'-( the beat? the vocals? the rocky??????? ((((i swear im still mj biased guys i just have Rockgie Brain this cb)))) This song feels like something you play when you are feeling nostalgic i can't explain why but... overall i would die for miss butterfly effect ten times over <3 [ #2 ]

ONE - ok don't come for me, i love her, but she was not what i was expecting!!! and thats ok!!!!!! i love her a lot!!! i just prefer other songs on the album! I will say i absolutely love the like "we come as woooooo" part where they wiggle their hands in the choreo :-) I have many things to say abt how little justice mr myungie got this title but i digress...(((((do not speak to me abt sir rocky's parts i will go into cardiac arrest if i think about it for too long)))) [ #9 ]

Someone Else - !!!!!!!!!!!! "just wanna be your star" you already are!!!! and i love all 6 of you!!!!!! Myungie vocals are Very Much Hitting in this one and i am Living Breathing Rejoicing!!!! also the very first like 10~ish seconds of the song is so neat!!! very fun!!! the last high note myungie hits at the very end of the song has healed me!! ~gotta go gotta go~ [ #7 ]

SNS - i think this song really showcases Dongmin's soft vocals beautifully!!!!!! the soda can opening sound was so cute i love it so much its my fav part of the song ngl.... I have nothing to say except: summer bop! i have fun listening to this song! I bet they had fun recording it! Its very happy and fun and it suits dongmin's vocals the best out of all the other songs imo so i am VERY MUCH IN LOVE WITH HER!!!!!!! [ #5 ]

All Good - IM GONNA SAY IT: SHE DESERVED TO BE THE TITLE!!!!!! ARE U KIDDING ME?????? ARE U K I D D I N G ME WITH THIS SONG!!!! ITS SO GOOD!!!!!! ITS UPBEAT!!!! ITS FUN!!!!! IT REMINDS ME OF BABY!!!! LIKE BABY'S OLDER SISTER THAT TANS ALL SUMMER AND WEARS GLITTERY MAKEUP AND DANCES AROUND THE HOUSE!!!! I PLAY THIS SONG ON LOOP!!! I CANNOT TELL U HOW MUCH I LOVE THIS SONG IT GIVES ME SO MUCH HAPPINESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! INSTANT FAVORITE!!!! NOTHING CAN TOUCH HER!!!! I COULD GO ON BUT I WILL SAVE U FROM MORE GUSHING!!!!!!!!!!! [ #1 favorite ]

All Stars - EVERYTHING IS OKAY! EVERY TIME IS OKAY! EVERYONE IS OKAY! pls this song is so fun too god i would jam to this in the car with my friends goin to the summer 4H fair and that's just the BEST VIBE!!!! i really don't have anything to say but jinwoo yellin everything is okay made me believe it :-) [ #8 ]

Our Spring - sanha vocals PLS he really stole the show :''-) he has grown so much as a singer and it SHOWS!!!!! i love bin's parts in this song too i think this kind of song really goes well with bin's voice idk im not a singer or musician by any means but i just feel like they match well!!!! she is overall a song i am definitely gonna put on my cleaning playlist!!! [ #10 ]

Stardust - i will really lose it if i think too much about this song bc i truly love it so MUCH.... i love the more ballad-y songs they do and this one did not Disappoint.... "baby you are stardust" dongmin pls my heart can't take it :-( also sanha's voice fits this song PERFECTLY i could listen to his parts alone on loop! This is a stargazing song and not just bc of the name but the Vibes Alone.... very sweet and warm and a little bit like a kiss on the forehead <3 miss stardust, my beloved [ #3 ]

Gemini - Myungie helped a lot with the creation of this song so ofc im very emotional about it!!!! he did so WELL!!!! this song is right up there with bloom for me and that's really sayin smth bc i *still* cry when i watch that one bloom stage (u kno the one...) this song makes me want to cry but in a good way!!!! i love astro so much and i am so proud of them and listening to this song.... sigh.... it feels like they are singing specifically for us with this one ((( i kno they sing for aroha always but i mean especially this song feels that way))) [ # 4 ]

[kangtaebins]

Weird Asks That Say A Lot

I said I was going to just answer all of these bc of boredom,, and so here I am

1. Coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans? Teacups are aesthetically pleasing idc what anyone says

2. Chocolate bars or lollipops? Lollipops

3. Bubblegum or cotton candy? Cotton candy supremacy

4. How did your elementary school teachers describe you? I was told that I was a leader a lot, and was told that I was very intelligent. Ah yes, I suffered from gifted kid burn out in high school-

5. Do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups? Look, plastic cups are the best. Specifically the ones with the lids and reusable straws

6. Pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear? It truly depends on the day bc some days I would say goth and other days I’d say grunge, but most days- pastel

7. Earbuds or headphones? Earbuds

8. Movies or TV shows? TV shows bc- idk actually I’m just not a movie person

9. Favorite smell in the summer? I have a weird obsession with the smell of cheap sunscreen and I have no clue why

10. Game you were best at in p.e.? I hated gym in high school and rarely participated despite the teacher being irritated with me (truly she gave up after a few months bc I really did not care at all) HOWEVER- I went to town in volleyball and still enjoy playing volleyball v much

11. What do you have for breakfast on an average day? I don’t eat breakfast often,,, 

12. Name of your favorite playlist? Probably my Navy or Indigo playlist

13. Lanyard or key ring? Key ring 

14. Favorite non-chocolate candy? Anything green apple!!!

15. Favorite book you read as a school assignment? I actually genuinely enjoyed Romeo And Juliet tbh

16. Most comfortable position to sit in? I always curl up in a ball on the couch, but in a chair I manspread ngl

17. Most frequently worn pair of shoes? Nike slides <//3

18. Ideal weather? Between 50-70 degrees, sunny but not warm, being able to wear a hoodie and not be hot or cold

19. Sleeping position? I usually either sleep on my left side or on my stomach (my back once in a while when it’s hurting bc I’m a hag)

20. Preferred place to write (i.e., in a note book, on your laptop, sketchpad, post-it notes, etc.)? I write on my phone more than anything

21. Obsession from childhood? Hm- I was really obsessed with High School Musical as a kid. My friend and I would put it on and lip sync to the songs and pretend we were the characters

22. Role model? Is it- wrong to say myself? Bc I feel like that sounds arrogant but genuinely it’s bc I’m constantly trying to better myself mentally and learn and grow. Idk I just am proud of who I am and look to myself when I need to find motivation

23. Strange habits? Strange? Idk if it’s strange but I’m constantly twiddling with the hem of my sleeves bc I love the feeling of it

24. Favorite crystal? Citrine 

25. First song you remember hearing? WH- bitch idk tf

26. Favorite activity to do in warm weather? Stay tf inside in the air conditioning

27. Favorite activity to do in cold weather? Stay tf inside in the heat

28. Five songs to describe you? To describe me?? Girl idk I'm all over the place. How about songs that resonate with me instead,,, Alive by Khalid, Paranoid by Lauv, Phobia by Dvwn, Fake Smile by Ariana Grande, and Breathin by Ariana Grande

29. Best way to bond with you? Truly I'm not very difficult to get along with, just don't be an asshole. Talk to me about psychology, current events, say Soobin is the cutest to exist idk it's not that hard

30. Places that you find sacred? I- hm. I'm not like a church person or anything so idk. Maybe just anything really old or places with very detailed and unique architecture

31. What outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names? I don't own many clothes,,, let alone nice clothes. I also don't really dress to impress I'd much rather be comfortable

32. Top five favorite vines? Oh god if I h a d to pick???? The lipstick in the Valentino bag, they were roommates, it's an avocado- thaaanks, jared 19, and uh,,, zach stooppp you're gonna get in trouble

33. Most used phrase in your phone? Tbh it's probably "girl what-" or "no bc"

34. Advertisements you have stuck in your head? That 877-CASH-NOW ONE JFC

35. Average time you fall asleep? Between 11pm-1am

36. What is the first meme you remember ever seeing? Probably the troll face one or smth

37. Suitcase or duffel bag? Suitcase

38. Lemonade or tea? I mix them together!

39. Lemon cake or lemon meringue pie? Lemon meringue pie bc I don't really like cake

40. Weirdest thing to ever happen at your school? Y'all I- went to a hs/college mixed school,, I've seen it all. Weirdest?? Idk but one weird thing I remember was when we were making whistles in art and some dude made a penis whistle 😭

41. Last person you texted? My best friend :))

42. Jacket pockets or pants pockets? Jacket pockets

43. Hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket? Hoodie 100%

44. Favorite scent for soap? I love soaps that smell like soap. Like ok duh I know that sounds dumb but yk what I mean? I don't want lemon or mint or whatever, I like the plain soap smell

45. Which genre: sci-fi, fantasy or superhero? Fantasy

46. Most comfortable outfit to sleep in? Oversized t-shirt, no pants. I question anyone that is comfortable sleeping with pants on-

47. Favorite type of cheese? Feta!

48. If you were a fruit, what kind would you be? I feel like I'd be a pineapple and I have no clue why

49. What saying or quote do you live by? Not necessarily a quote but more of a thought: live for yourself, enjoy each day, do what gives you joy

50. What made you laugh the hardest you ever have? I have had so many instances in which I have laughed so hard I peed and to even attempt to name one is impossible

51. Current stresses? Making sure my family gets their vaccines and stays safe

52. Favorite font? I don't think I have one? Anything except comic sans

53. What is the current state of your hands? What does this even mean 💀 I mean,, they're holding my phone, cold, and my nails are unpolished

54. What did you learn from your first job? That people are assholes but I'm capable of not giving a fuck bc life is not that damn serious

55. Favorite fairy tale? Is The Three Little Pigs considered a fairy tale?

56. Favorite tradition? Putting up the Christmas tree with my mom :( it's always a lot of fun

57. The three biggest struggles you’ve overcome? Depression, grief, and hopefully one day- smth I'm currently dealing with

58. Four talents you’re proud of having? Makeup!! But also: singing, crying on command, and tying cherry stems with my tongue

59. If you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be? Sick of these bitches

60. If you were a character in an anime, what kind of anime would you want it to be? I don't watch anime so idk

61. Favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.? It's this line from Eleanor & Park: "Eleanor was right: She never looked nice. She looked like art, and art wasn't supposed to look nice; it was supposed to make you feel something."

62. Seven characters you relate to? Holy hell, 7?? Probably won't get that many but hm,,, Darlene from Roseanne, Hermione from Harry Potter, Emily from Pretty Little Liars maybe?? Idk I suddenly blanked

63. Five songs that would play in your club? As if it's Your Last by BP, anything from SHINee, anything from Ariana, also anything Rihanna, just a bunch of women tbh

64. Favorite website from your childhood? FUCKING WEBKINZ BRO

65. Any permanent scars? I have a few on my arms idk where they came from tbh, I also have one on my hand from my sister 🧍🏻‍♀

66. Favorite flower(s)? Sunflowers!!! I also really love lilacs 💔

67. Good luck charms? My dog's collar that I wear as a bracelet

68. Worst flavor of any food or drink you’ve ever tried? Licorice-

69. A fun fact that you don’t know how you learned? It takes repeating a piece of information 12 times at random to memorize it completely

70. Left or right handed? Right

71. Least favorite pattern? Fucking chevron- and realistic camo, and anything with the American flag

72. Worst subject? Yall im awful at history. American history, world history, all of it-

73. Favorite weird flavor combo? Either pickles and peanut butter or cheese and grapes

74. At what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen? I'm stubborn but also always in pain so I've become numb to a lot of body pains. I have to be at like a 7-8 before I take smth otherwise I'd always be taking it

75. When did you lose your first tooth? I was probably like 5 I was definitely in Kindergarten

76. What’s your favorite potato food (i.e. tater tots, baked potatoes, fries, chips, etc.)? I fw baked potatoes

77. Best plant to grow on a windowsill? I have a love for succulents

78. Coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store? Oh my- I don't drink coffee but coffee from a gas station

79. Which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo? Driver's license for sure

80. Earth tones or jewel tones? Jewel tones

81. Fireflies or lightning bugs? I say both,, but I think I say lightning bugs more

82. PC or console? PC

83. Writing or drawing? Both

84. Podcasts or talk radio? Podcasts definitely

84. Barbie or polly pocket? Barbie

85. Fairy tales or mythology? Fairy tales

86. Cookies or cupcakes? C o o k i e s

87. Your greatest fear? Losing people I love

88. Your greatest wish? To live comfortably and be a great mother

89. Who would you put before everyone else? My family

90. Luckiest mistake? Guessing on 90% of a test and getting an A 💀

91. Boxes or bags? Bags are easier to carry-

92. Lamps, overhead lights, sunlight or fairy lights? Fairy lights!!

93. Nicknames? Sam, Sammi, my sister calls me Sams, my best friend calls me Bub, and my gf calls me Baby if that counts- 👀

94. Favorite season? Fall omg it's gorgeous and has perfect temperatures

95. Favorite app on your phone? ✨tumblr✨

96. Desktop background? Its literally a pic of Soobin, Taehyun, and Beomgyu

97. How many phone numbers do you have memorized? Like 4-5

98. Favorite historical era? The one where white people learn their fucking place and stop being racist, homophobic, classist, sexist, all the -ists and -phobics,,,, so none. Fuck history :))

[shaechans]

ask game!!

the answers are under the cut in case it goes too long hehe

Last Song You Listened To?

from home by nct

Relationship Status.

single!!

Did You Wake Up Cranky?

no in fact i woke in a really good mood cause i didn’t have school lmao

How Many Followers?

426 holy shit thank you

Take A Vitamin Daily?

nope

Do You Sing In The Shower?

of course. but sometimes i just think of shower thoughts

What Books Are You Reading?

started the hunger games series recently

Grab The Book Nearest To You, Turn To Page 64, Give Me Line 14.

“information technology (IT) is the study of design, development, implementation, support or management of computer based information” that’s my sisters’ 8th grade social textbook lols

Favourite Anime?

death note (thats the only ive watched so far, gonna start haikyuu soon)

Last Person You Cried In Front Of?

my mom sigh i cried cause of this terrible headache i had and couldn’t handle anymore

Do You Collect Anything?

...albums?

What Did You Have For Lunch?

fish curry and fish fry yum

Do You Dance In The Car?

more like sing than dance but then again, it depends on the song and the mood im in

Do You Watch The Olympics?

as of now, no but i might have to soon

What Time Do You Usually Go To Bed?

11pm on school days and 1-2am on weekends

Are You Wearing Makeup Right Now?

nope

Do You Prefer To Swim In A Pool Or The Ocean?

none. i don’t like swimming. but if i chad to choose, pool. i’m thalassophobic

Bottled Water Or Tap Water?

bottled!!!

What Makes You Happy?

making people laugh, the noise of laughter, kpop, and spending time with people i like annoying

Post A Gif Of What You’re Currently Feeling Right Now.

Do You Study Better With Or Without Music?

with music. but like music i haven’t heard before otherwise i get distracted and sing along

Dogs Or Cats?

dogs!!!!!!!111!!!! but cats have been coming at me recently

If You Were A Crayon What Colour Would You Be?

ngl red or orange

PlayStation Or Xbox

hmm playstation

Would You Swim In The Lake Or Ocean?

lake better than ocean

Do You Believe In Magic?

yesss except black magic that’s bullshit

What Colour Shirt Are You Wearing?

juniper green

Can You Curl Your Tongue?

yup!

Is There Anything Pink Within 10 Feet Of You?

yes my shorts

Do You Have Any Obsessions Right Now?

yes treasure (and superm’s super one album)

Have You Ever Caught A Butterfly?

noooo they’re scary

Are You Easily Influenced By Other People?

yes VERY easily. i’m a trend follower

Do You Have Strange Dreams?

all the time, it’s fun to think about in the morning

Do You Like Going On Airplanes?

oh yesss i love plane rides

Peanuts Or Sunflower Seeds?

peanuts

If I Handed You A Concert Ticket Right Now, Who Would You Want The Performer To Be?

nct / the 1975

Are You A Picky Eater?

yes, VERY. and i have a small appetite so i can never really eat too much

Do You Like To Read / Write?

hmm write more than read

Do You Like Your Music Loud?

in between. sometimes it depends on my mood. but i’ll often lower the volume than increase

Would You Rather Carve Pumpkins Or Wrap Presents?

hmmm present wrapping would be fun

What Season Are You In Right Now? (Weather)

it’s the autumn > winter transition

What Are You Craving Right Now?

cookies and french fries:(( even though i ate those an hour ago

Post A Screenshot Of Your Tumblr Feed.

lmao my ask and yes i use my laptop so

What Is Your Gender?

female!

Coffee Or Tea?

i don’t mind really but i would prefer coffee over tea

Do You Have Any Homework Right Now? If So, What Is It About?

nope but i do have a marketing test on the 29th yikes

Do You Make Your Bed In The Morning?

yes im tidy like that

Favourite Pokemon?

squirtle and snorlax cuties

Favourite Social Media?

ngl right now really proud of my tumblr. but it’s usually my instagram

What’s Your Opinion On Instagram Stories?

i love them

Do You Get Homesick?

YES ALOT, like i feel like that as soon as im out my house for like 5 minutes

Are You A Virgin?

yes and im 15

If You Were Far From Home And Needed To Sleep For The Night, Would You Choose To Rent A Crappy Motel Room For $60 Or Sleep In Your Car For Free?

fuck that motel i’d sleep in the car wtf

Are Both Of Your Blood Parents Still In Your Life?

yes<3

Whats The Next Movie You Want To See In Theaters?

hmm i don’t really yet

Do You Miss Your Ex?

don’t have one woohoo

What Is Your Favourite Quote Right Now?

if beyonce can forgive jayz, i can forgive you ~ kevin moon

Did You Like Swinging As A Child? Do You Still Get Excited When You See A Swing Set?

the swings were are my favourite on the playground. i LOVE going on them and will fight 5 year olds to sit on one >.<

What Was The Last Thing You Ate?

banana

Would You Give A Homeless Person CPR If They Were Dying? Why Or Why Not?

OF COURSE. i would help anyone in need of help, homeless or not, outcast or not. if you wouldn’t please unfollow me thank you

Been On The Computer For 5 Hours Straight?

...yes

Stalked Someone On A Social Network?

..........yes

Do You Like Meeting New People?

sometimes yes sometimes no. it depends on the group of people, i’m attracted to lively and playful groups pf people

Do You Wear Rings? If You Do, Take A Picture Of Them.

nopeee

Do You Sleep With Your Bedroom Door Open Or Closed?

opennnn

What Are Three Things You Did Today?

made myself a sandwich, replayed enhypen’s teaser a billion times and watched nct world’s latest episode

What Do You Wear To Bed?

comfy clothes

List All Of Your Different Beauty Products You Have Right Now.

none

Are You A Day Or Night Person?

day hmmm what

Tell Me About A Dream That You Had And When It Happened.

i.... cannot remember.. i briefly remember this one dream where i, along with a group of people were locked up in this tower thing and it was a test???? and the judge was rain. he trained us for a week or something to rock climbing. and then i remember sunwoo helping me win when he was in the opposite team and he was about to kiss me woop but i fell.. and suddenly i was running away in a getaway car there were sirens in the beat of your heart kjakjahsj and then i woke up whew

Favourite Soda Drink?

ginger ale

Do You Wear Jeans Or Sweats More?

jeans

How Do You Look Right Now?

face oily, neck sore and eyes falling woooo

Name Something That Relaxes You

this playlist

What Tattoo Do You Want?

lowkey want a mmdiii (2503) or Yea, Simon says Hurry up 거리에 널린 flat hoop들 멈춘 순간 널 향해 조준 다 쏜다Hands up 뒤돌아 Hands up 흔들어 숨이 가득 차도 여기 법 계속 달려왜 또 눈치만 보고 서있나 우두커니 왜 또 겁먹은 표정을 짓나 이걸 원해?주문을 외워 I'm God 너희를 홀려 like wow NCT we all so sexy NCT noise you can't break me 누가 날 욕해 who Bless me achoo Simon says be cool Don't be such a fool Simon says 우린 real vibe killer (killer killer killer) Simon says 우린 real vibe killer (killer killer killer) 너네들은 다 mine mine mine mine mine 너네들은 다 mine mine mine mine mine 필요 없어 그딴 말말말말말 We don't pay no mind mind mind mind mind Yo 꽉 막힌 차 사이로 길을 여는 siren 니 맘에 그 체증을 밤새 뚫고 달려누구보다 빨라 전부 뒤에 가있어 거침없어 모든 건 내게 달려Eh 점점 분위기는 high high high high 우릴 막는 소린 bye bye bye bye 신경 다 끄고 놀아 밤새 누가 뭐라 하든 상관 안 해주문을 외워 I'm God 너희를 홀려 like wow NCT we all so sexy NCT noise you can't break me 누가 날 욕해 who Bless me achoo Simon says be cool Don't be such a fool Simon says 우린 real vibe killer (killer killer killer) Simon says 우린 real vibe killer (killer killer killer) 너네들은 다 mine mine mine mine mine 너네들은 다 mine mine mine mine mine 필요 없어 그딴 말말말말말 We don't pay no mind mind mind mind mind두려워하지마 널 막는 건 너 일 뿐 yeah 착각하지마 우린 오늘 break the rules 눈을 뜨고 깨어나 이 순간 깊숙이 빠져들어가 현실과 꿈의 사이 진짜 널 찾는 그 순간Simon says 우린 real vibe killer (aye, real vibe killer) Simon says 우린 real vibe killer (aye, real vibe killer) 너네들은 다 mine mine mine mine mine 너네들은 다 mine mine mine mine mine 필요 없어 그딴 말말말말말 We don't pay no mind mind mind mind mind We don't pay no attention but i don’t maybe the mmdiii.

whew that was a long one...kudos to whoever read all this bullshit

[1-800-seo]

domestic dad!kook

hi everyone I thought I’d post my crap here so here is my domestic dad!kook Drabble list thing?

involves: pregnancy, established relationship/marriage, kissing, hickies?, general tomfoolery, nothing major, dad!jungkook,

————————————————————

* those damned blue lines

* you thought you wouldn’t see them so soon

* after all you had only been married eighteen months

* old relatives have been asking since day 1 when they’re gonna he seeing some lil jeons running around smh aunty karen

* you wondered how he would react

* he’d never shown any adverse reaction to children before but he was practically still a child himself

* the spiderman onesie you washed yesterday attests to that

* you decided to tell him at dinner

* he’d just had his first bite of tagliatelle when you accidentally blurted it out

* “IM PREGNANT”

* “what?” he replied snapping his head up with wide doe eyes

* “I-I found out this morning...I’m definitely pregnant. I know it’s soon, but we can make this work.”

* “What’re you on about? This is amazing baby, I finally get to be a dad!”

* “So you want this?”

* “Definitely, I’ve always imagined a family with you, it was just a matter of time. I’m so happy though baby, over the moon.”

* The smile on his face was beaming and the twinkle in his eye sparkled, he looked the epitome of happiness

* “I’m glad you want this then, it’ll be a wild ride but I’m glad it’s with you.”

* you reach out and squeeze his hand, as a fat tear of joy rolls down your cheek

* “I’m glad too, I know we’re young but it feels so right, so right with you.”

* he looks down, a tear dripping onto the table

* he wipes a few more and giggles

* “Tbh im surprised this didn’t happen earlier considering we go at it like rabbits”

* “KOOK” you cant help but laugh

* He is right lol

—————————————————ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•��•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ

—————————————————

One month 🍼

* “Where is my wife and my spawn~~~~~~”

* Jeongguk loudly sang as he burst thru the front door, arriving home from work

* “Wym spawn???“ You say as he pulls you into a bear hug and flops both of you on the couch

* “You know,, spawn, this baby, it’s my spawn hence why I’m calling it spawn like the superhero,, duh”

* he drops his hands down to your stomach and rest them their, flat palmed

* bowing his head so he is closer he says

* “I can’t wait to meet you Spawnie”

* Immediately you burst into a fit of laughter at the outrageous name

* “we CANNOT nickname our baby SPAWN, JEONGGUK”

* “Why not I think it’s well cool”

* he calmly replies proud smirk on his face

* “Is Spawn even a good guy?”

* “ummm”

* “wym ummm??”

* “well he’s kind of ambiguous in the comics”

* “OH GREAT WE HAVE A BABY NAMED SPAWN THAT IS OF AMBIGUOUS MORALITY”

* at that comment you both fell about laughing, your sides beginning to hurt at it all

* and that was how your unborn baby was nicknamed Spawn

—————————————————ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ

—————————————————

Three Months 🍼

* “I can’t push the trolley, I’m pregnant”

* you said matter of factly

* “oh you’re just being lazy,, I mean I’m not saying I won’t push the trolley, but you’re really pushing the boat out, baby”

* “hehehe my plan worked, you fool, you may have suspected me, however you still fell right into my trap muhahahaha”

* you dramatically laugh and put your hands on your hips like a comical villain

* so anyways you skrt skrt around the shop

* and right next to the book section is you know what

* the BABY SECTION

* so far you actually haven’t looked their yet because you don’t know the gender

* but curiosity brings you snooping in the aisles

* Jeongguk returns from the bakery section, carrying croissants and hair swept into a messy top knot

* you stare at the many many many racks of children’s clothes

* tiny baby booties

* hats that kook could only fit on his fist

* so so smol baby-grows

* “ngl I’m kinda overwhelmed”

* “how come?”

* he puts his hands round your waist and rests his head on your shoulders

* big soft comfy back hug

* “idk it’s a lot of responsibility, right? I can’t even begin to think about names never mind washing, clothing, feeding this tiny human being when it arrives”

* “baby, you have nothing to worry about, and I am positive you’re going to be the best most caring mother ever, and I have full trust in that.”

* He places a soft chaste kiss on the top of your head

* “thank you for always supporting me ggukie”

* “It’s my pleasure; we’re going to have the best baby ever, aren’t we Spawnie”

* You roll your eyes and kiss his cheek

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Four Months 🍼

* you were sat on the couch in your small apartment, small but sufficient

* Jungkook was painting the spare room and deconstructing old furniture you were selling on eBay

* You’re job was to arrange the business dealings and to look for new kid-appropriate furniture to reoccupy the spaces now blank

* It was fine by you

* saves you from getting up off the couch and getting all sweaty

* after a good few hours JK came out from the room, sweat on his brow and hungry

* hungry for something else tho 👀

* he stalks over to where you are sitting and kneels on the floor in front of your knees

* he rests his head on your lap, arms folded underneath it

* his eyes were dark, full of want

* “How’s it going baby? You tired?”

* “hmmm”

* he just stares back

* brows slightly furrowed

* soon enough he was peppering your face in warm kisses

* he flipped you over and sat you on his lap, hands resting on your waist

* his lips latched onto your neck and he sucked a flourish of purple and blue flowers under your jaw

* his lips were warm and supple on your skin

* it sent a shiver down your spine and goosebumps to your skin

* you found the hem of his black T-shirt and slid your hands under the fray

* you’re hands met the toned muscle of his stomach and the soft honey skin

* “looks like I can’t knock you up since someone already has, oh well, more fun for me”

* his hands fiddled with the fabric of your top

* you obliged and pulled it over your head

* you were met with his mouth hungrily crashing into yours as he searched for more and soon enough you were underneath him

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Six Months 🍼

* your belly was fairly noticeable by now and you couldn’t avoid the fact that you were pregnant

* people were starting to let you sit instead of them in public places

* you were getting more and more randos asking to touch your belly as well which wasn’t the greatest

* JK is always in protective dad mode™️ when this happens

* he’s ready to protect his babies

* one time when a sketchy looking old man asked to touch your belly JK immediately stood in between you and the guy

* he puffed out his chest and was hella macho

* Alpha Jungkook arises hehe

* ever since then he was more aware that people would be looking at you and more interested in you in general

* anyways

* he’s hella excited to be a dad

* his excitement is so pure and genuine it’s so sweet

* it’s like every day he gets more excited and you think by the full 9 months he’ll just be so excited he’ll be vibrating like a washing machine lol

* every night he kisses you and your baby good night

* “Night night baby jeon spawnie”

* without fail it makes you giggle

* his lil nose always brushes against your skin when he says it and it’s ticklish and comforting

* you can’t wait to meet your baby to see which of you they look like and in what ways

* will they have your double lidded eyes or his unique nose

* will they have his bunny teeth or your short stature

* either way they’ll be the most loved being in this world

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Seven Months 🍼

* it was time for the long awaited gender reveal

* you and him had decided that you would go alone to the appointment since he had work and then you would surprise Ggukie when he gets back

* you decided the way you would tell him was by dressing in either blue or pink

* you know you know,, not really breaking gender stereotypes, but it gets the idea over

* so that’s what you do

* you wear you’re best maternity day dress and do your makeup all güd

* it’s 5:30pm and he’s so excited to know

* he barges thru the door and basically and sprints to you

* he’s met with a baby blue clad wife, her hair adorned with a periwinkle ribbon

* immediately he knows and swoops you up into a bear hug

* “Jungkook? We’re going to have a little baby boy!”

* “I’m so happy! I feel like I’ve drank five red bulls,, we’re going to have a boy”

* When you pull away from the hug his cheeks have tears dripping down them and his eyes are wet

* “aww baby why’re you crying?”

* “because I’m just so happy, I can’t wait to see him, he’s going to be perfect, we’ll all be perfect”

* “you’re right kook, we’ll be perfect”

* “You don’t know how much I love you, you know?”

* that was when you started crying tears of happiness too

* youd remember this moment forever

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Eight Months 🍼

* “I think it’s time to think of some actual names”

* “yeahhh people at work keep thinking I’m actually calling the baby Spawnie and then I keep having to explain why it’s called Spawn and i don’t particularly like explaining that Spawn is a play on sperm and that’s my sperm”

* “What goes ON at your work”

* “you don’t even wanna know babygirl”

* “ummm so I was thinking, something familial, i don’t want a western name tho so that rules out my side,, unless you want to call him Barry”

* “uhh no thanks babes”

* “yeahh they’d sound like the flash lol”

* “I don’t want none of that DC propaganda in my household thanks”

* “tru tru”

* “so what about your side of family? Can you think of any family who have named you like?”

* “What about Junseok? My great uncle is called Junseok and I think that’s cool, also it kinda looks like a combination of Namjoon-hyung and Jin-hyung’s names.”

* “Wow they’d love that, that’s a good idea actually.”

* “Jeon Junseok, has a good ring to it”

* “I agree”

* “It’s settled then until further notice”

* “It seems it is Mr Jeon”

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First Week Home 🍼

* The moment Junseok was in his little sunset coloured crib you burst into tears of relief

* you’d obviously been stressing post birth about the intricacies and once you’d got him home and settled it was like a weight of your shoulders

* he was home

* he was safe

* and you were both over the moon

* he had the smallest nose and the biggest doe eyes

* his dark hair swept across his delicate skin on his forehead

* you just knew he’d be the spitting image of his dad

* each following day with Junseok was amazing

* he was good for you

* slept so well

* settled into routine easily

* it’s as if you never had to worry

* and Jungkook was a life saver

* he was such an attentive father and husband

* always caring for you and Junseok

* every morning he’d bring you up a cup of herbal tea and bowl of granola

* and go check on the baby and if he’s awake change and feed him

* his paternity leave was a blessing

* it meant you actually got a lie in instead of Junseok waking you up

* “I can do the baby this morning, it’s ok”

* you say sitting up in bed

* “no no I’ll do it I’m used to getting up at this time for work anyway”

* “but you’ve been doing it all this week I feel bad”

* “Baby, rest, I want to do this, you deserve a rest after carrying the baby for nine months, I’m sure I can take care of him for a few mornings”

* then he gave u a sweet kiss and left to see his baby boy

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Eighteen Months 🍼

* you pulled on Junseok’s tiny yellow wellies as Jungkook put on his coat

* “where are we going seokie?”

* “P-p-p” Junseok tried his best to get out the letters

* “Yayyy we’re going to the park”

* “Me and your mum are going to meet uncle Jimin too, and you know what that means? You’re going to get spoileddd”

* “V tru, but why does he always spoil him? I mean it’s not a problem he gets free things and stuff, but do you reckon he’s compensating for something?”

* “Yeah as nice as it is I think he might be compensating for not being around as often as he’d like to, solo career going strong as all, you know how he loves kids, in his head he probably thinks he’s an absent uncle but in reality he’s ever present just away for an odd weekend, which is normal”

* “yeah I get that”

* “But it’ll be nice to see him anyway, we can ask him about his new single”

* “Oh I’ve heard that it’s pretty good”

* Junseok pulled at the hem of your coat, indicating he wants to leave

* So off you went

* the day was filled with jumping in muddy puddles and Jimin nearly falling in said puddles

* Junseok got all dirty so you had to go find a bathroom to clean him up at

* hence why you ended up at an ice cream parlour in winter

* despite the cold weather you enjoyed the ice cream nonetheless

* JK teases Jimin a few times because apparently Jimin’s white blond hair was vanilla ice cream and his was chocolate

* Jimin insisted his was bingsu however JK refused

* Junseok had a great time fluffing up uncle Jimin’s hair after that

* and so the day drew to an end

* you headed home

* Seokie sleeping in the car all the way there

* you gently took him into the house and the pair of you collapsed on the couch and immediately fell asleep

* it was the cutest thing

* and when you woke up you saw your two boys asleep so soundly

* and you thought to yourself how content with your life you were

* how lucky you were

* how much you love those boys

* and you’d do anything for them

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The End hehehe :)