#im so fucking inactive sorry goddamn

[chifonsiano]

hi im back

[pinkmirth]

hi y’all :) it’s been a hot minute, but im back nowww (i think!) sorry about the inactivity, it’s been a rough couple of weeks for me… (disclaimer: there’s a teensy tiny rant below!!!)

a few weeks ago, me and my boyfriend of two years decided to break things off. our relationship went fine for the most part, it was just that his dad hated me with a passion. as you could imagine, it was hard to deal with my own partner’s father complaining about him being with me, since I cant speak any Chinese dialect. (for context, his dad is Chinese and wanted his son to marry someone of the same ethnicity.) I’ve been working on my Mandarin for the past two years, but it was never good enough for his dad. So, we ended things on decent terms. in all honesty, i wanted to walk straight into fucking manhattan traffic 😭 i felt so shitty, i could hardly touch my phone for a goddamn week. to top that off, i cried so hard that i literally got sick somehow? don’t know how that works, but I ended up with a sore throat for days afterwards. but! I gave it some time, and it’s sunk in a little. not completely over him, but I’m feeling much better than i was four weeks ago. i’ve also been busy with hunting for a new apartment and deciding whether or not to transfer schools. Vinland saga mondays and my newfound obsession with atsv (specifically that fine man miguel o’hara) are the only things that are keeping me going rn… anyway! hopefully I’ll find enough time to write this summer, because I’m in dire need of a distraction lol

— xoxo, moni (reiner braun’s hot wife <3)

[francis-writes]

That's totally okay man i don't mind, i like to rant about my theories and observations of characters and i like to see a rant back instead of few words lol it feels like we are writing a goddamn thesis about ramsay and his behaviour haha only if i think and talk about my visas and finals that much i would have a 4.0!

A yes! The thing is I think Ramsay is the type of person who is addicted to attention, any kind of attention really, I think that in the books you can see that his behavior is yeah, kinda because of how he was raised (and made lol) and his sadistic tentacles but also trying to gain his fathers attention and approval. Because you see, his father doesn't actually give a shit about him when he goes away and even when he is with him, but when he does something bad, like killing his Lady wife with starvation, he can capture his fathers attention a little bit, and his father usually insults him and degrade him but hey, attention is attention. So he is kind of an attention whore in some perspective, he is a bastard but people notice him if he is a vicious bastard, so, he is a sadist yes but i think he likes and craves attention, and i dont think it would be so different with a partner, i think him as someone who gets mad and demanding if got ignored by his partner. I think him as a switch depending on the person so if he is in the dominant role he would demand and gets attention with force but if he is in a more submissive role he would get himself in trouble, misbehave and try to gain attention (doesnt matter which type, can be a hug or slap on the face)

And about good attention (like playing with his hair, hugs or soft kisses), i think he would be like the " +the fuck is that? -affection! +disgusting!.... Do it again" meme at first but then he get used to it and want it constantly lol not that i dont think he would be caught asking for it more like when he wants a hug would follow you with a frown until you do it yourself lol

I also think kind of same about OG reek, he was actually sent as a servant, but i think that he saw him as a friend (in this own way) since he didn't have one. And i cant help but think, in the books it is heavily implied that ramsay raped theon, but i dont really remember it was implied for him with other men (correct me if im wrong), and since he was making theon a second reek (he also forbid him to bathe and change clothes because og reek was naturally smell horrible), did he had some sort of sexual relationship with OG reek, i dont know. Damn i ranted too much sorry lol

Don't be sorry! I am actually very happy that i finally have someone to talk about Ramsay with, especially that I started thinking that I got into fandom too late, after his death in TV show and after last publishing book, because I barely could find anyone posting for Ramsay. Blogs focused on him were either inactive or practically deleted so I just thought that I post for myself and maybe a few people, liking my post but not responding. I mean, some of my classic old posts Ramsay x wimpy maid type were still liked, but it seemed that no one wanted to discuss or explore his character further. (like, honestly, i don't even require serious psychological analysis. I love authors who did fanarts like "Ramsay living in the 1980s", "Ramsay having a youtube channel" - here i loved that all the other characters had channels named by their formal names while Ramsay had nick like xxflayedboixx lol. If i remember i saw these on @ivansbadart ; i can't remember where but i also saw "Ramsay if he had only fans". Yeah, i love all the ways of exploring character).

About his father... yeah, at first I somehow believed that when Roose was away fighting, he knew about Ramsay's plan to take Winterfell, but then I realized that Ramsay had no chance to inform him. So Roose was actually like "oh, my only remaining son is dead. Good.". But tbh there was later something about Roose that "he does not love. he does not hate and he does not grieve".

In the topic of good affection, I wrote somewhere before about this, but I considered that he might have a mommy kink. I don't know if my arguments are logical or am i just pushing my kinks on favourite characters lol I'll just put in the screen of that rant:

Also, never worry about ranting. You are saving my boyfriend from hearing my monologues. I recently said that he may make tier list of my fictional crushes, but he would put everyone under F. And he was like "no, i would put them under H, like >get help<"

[prodbyton]

I SWEAR BEING IN LIKE SMALL COMMUNTIES N BEING A KPOP STAN IS SOOOOO HARD MY GODDDD also yes being a canadian stan…so rough ive been waiting fir tbz to come here for years n youd think bc they have two canadian members…but nooo…its so sick

but omg i love changmin sm i am so glad u get me bff. and yes half of the albums being out of print is fucking crazy…i have all no air versions except for off air bc when i went to buy it….oh my it was like $250 for one n i decided on that day i was going to die…and even when i just got the two versions…i spent $150 for both which is so embarrassing, also the reveal album i bought was around $70 it was insane…the cheapest album i own is my superm album n it was $35 from walmart….and my most expensive album i spent about $100 on for just the one…and im embarrassed to say i dont regret it bc i pulled changmin n my heart became happy

i think it has smth to do w visas and the venues + their fuckass company (THANK GOD THEY ARE LEAVING…) ive only seen three kpop groups in my area and i missed nct dream cuz i had the stomach virus i didn’t wanna turn the dream show into hanteo music awards… but i will be seeing dream again in december idgaf 😫☝🏽

idk the canadian dollars to usd conversion but GODDAMN THOSE ARE SO EXPENSIVEEE 😭😭😭 hell naw i would just have to stan from a distance with no albums… and i have a LOT of albums… any album over 25 dollars im not buying like sorry i just refuse!! and 25 dollars still seems crazy to me… 😒 i think the cheapest album i bought was mino xx album… which was like 12 dollars cuz it was on sale cuz the store was going out of business 😫

i dont ever remember the names of albums so bare with me… i have bloom bloom, thrill ride and the stealer… i also have their lightstick!! TBZ WILL NEVER DISBAND IF THEY DO ILL KMS 😭😭😭 seeing some of my 2nd and 3rd gen ults disband/become inactive is HORRIBLE and im gonna be so depressed if it happens w tbz… like naur… pleek….

and dont worry ab spamming me i really dont mind !! if you ever wanna talk you can always just dm me im cool i swear 😛

[naberiuz]

nothing to see here lol

deactivating my art twitter for the second time lmao

i have this weird problem of enjoying drawing fanart but hating the whole socmed aspect...

the thing is it's not really the likes/rts that piss me off, i can handle the cricket noises just fine cuz im more about liking my own creations than the numbers

my problem is not having friends (in twt terms, mutuals) who care enough about the shit i post....LOL

there's this thing in twt where you would follow fellow artists who share interests with you and they would follow you back (if they want) and it's pretty nice at first

but then they just...never interact with me at all. and the ones who do eventually get stressed with their lives and go inactive lmao

idk i just always felt like im invisible on twitter...my own followers don't even like my fanart lmaoo it's usually total strangers who like my stuff. i guess i have a mistake with target audience?

and in order to be noticed by others i have to act obnoxiously (sorry to those twitter people) like idk some middle schooler...whocan't chill with their hcs and "hot" takes and have to be perpetually online...like goddamn i hate that so much

idk maybe im just not interesting enough or not gen Z enough to be chronically online...this socmed engagement thing just isn't right for me sigh

ig the only way to really blow up for me is to be so fucking good that i dont have to interact with anybody but ye thats not happening until uhh maybe 10 years from now

[ltdrunkagain]

y’all can’t tell me that the suffering game ost from the adventure zone isn’t pure hank and connor investigating jams

like someone please replace the detroit ost with the suffering game in their scenes together

@hnkanderson  hey you know adventure zone come over here and agree with me

[jonoosa]

I haven't been on tumblr for like.. 3 days?? And I already miss it lmao has anything interesting happened

[kegstandking]

hey all -- sorry for being so goddamn inactive here. my muse for billy isn’t dead and while i am writing on my other blog, it’s still a goddamn struggle. depression has been really really kicking my ass lately. to the point some days i can’t even fucking function properly. i don’t have access to the help i need or the medication at the moment so it’s mostly me just fighting with my willpower. some days are better than others, but this past week has been particularly brutal. holidays running my raw. 

that said i’m absolutely still in love with trash king and i am writing - but i think i want to try writing smaller things while i get my brain and head back on right. so if you wanna write some smaller interactions, nudge me in ims and we can plot. i really love billy and this blog, i can’t stress it enough. it’s just trying to jumpstart myself again.

[jazzhandsmcleg]

@devieklutz @im-significant @punrisenebula @geekhyena

honhonhonhon

Jesus, cousins just coming out of the woodwork around here! It only makes sense, but still, I’m laughing a little. Thank you, anon!

Now separated for ease of reading.

—

devieklutz: a really tough person with a big heart and a tremendous love for animals; owner of a really cute dog. We’ve never really spoken and Devie’s blog has been mostly inactive for the past year or so, so this one’s a little short, sorry – but Devie is a cherished part of the Young Wizards fandom and that is the case for a reason!

—

im-significant: hey! We play Dungeons and Dragons together sometimes, did you know? Hell yeah. Ana is very friendly! They are my partner in Lutheran politics discussions and tomato adoration. They have fingers in many, many different pies and enjoy sharing them with others, and they have a way of making even boring things like the weather or things I have absolutely no knowledge about like obscure anime enjoyable by dint of sheer enthusiasm. They have a great sense of aesthetic and – reader. Sometimes they enjoy my poetry so much they reblog it. Holy shit.

Here is my favorite story about Ana: when we were on the way to the OG CrossingsCon we had a brief, Ana-prompted “swordfight” with their cane and cousin Sky’s car keys (which had the little button you press to extend the actual metal key bit from the plastic). Ana was humming the Star Wars theme at the time, in homage to my fascination with the key-popping-out process and its similarity to a lightsaber.

Ana is also a con staff member, so a shout out and thanks to them!

—

punrisenebula, I cannot fucking believe. Bryton, come over here and look at this! Anon, you should be goddamn proud of yourself. Jesus Christ.

Bryton is in charge of puns, okay, and it is a power wielded well. Which is to say terribly. Which is to say well again. They (sorry, I’m not up to date on your pronouns) have always struck me as assured and steady: they seem know exactly what they believe in and why, and also seem to know exactly what they want from life. This is either a tremendous gift or a tremendous skill. (That’s no small beans, even if it’s not true – appearances are also part of the battle!) They also have a really gorgeous creative streak – they are both a good artist with a great eye for stylistic touches that make a piece pop, and a good storyteller – funny and good-humored, with a familiarity that draws the reader in and generates smiles.

—

geekhyena: Geekhyena is my other source for all things animal science, a role they also fill very well! They apply that same scientific approach to a variety of other things, as well – history, politics, art, nature, health, social justice matters, and more, so every time I see something she’s reblogged on my dash I know I’m in for new information, fascinatingly presented. It’s always a pleasure to learn from them. Alternatively, sometimes I know I’m in for some new good fanfic. There’s some great sideways Harry Potter stuff out there, and Geekhyena seems to have a good handle on it all.

And they’re another con staff member! Thanks for all you do!

Finally, pumpkin bread: 12/10, hell yeah? Hell yeah.

[survivor-rotuma]

Ep. 2: “iF yOu SeE a VoLcAnO wHy NoT jUmP oVeR iT” - Marie

Marie

Fuckin volcano

Felix

I feel secure because Charlie is going to be the one to go. I just know it. If we go to tribal that is. They have barely spoken and I don't know them too well. Might be the same for everyone else here

Marie

Still salty bout the goddamn volcano

Marie

iF yOu SeE a VoLcAnO wHy NoT jUmP oVeR iT

Flint

I am really enjoying the banter with Jay and our tribe. Having a great time with this immunity challenge and chatting with Joey and Felix. Wish the other tribe mates were as active.

Brianna

Ya know coming into this competition i didn’t expect it to be me and Bradley as the last two people representing our team. I guess he’s gonna be more active now since his busy week is over so that’s swell but like. God I really wanna sleep.

Felix

To sum up, I feel like I am getting a deeper bond with Flint and Joey. They seem to be willing to talk with me most often. So, even if we do go to tribal I am safe for the most part. I just feel like I am liked in the tribe. Also, I am the one putting in the most work for the tribe, so I have that going for me. I just feel safe because of the work I have put in, but I don't want to give up just yet. If I can avoid tribal, then I will. According to both Joey and Flint, Suzy and Charlie have been very inactive. Therefore, it will be them on the chopping block come time for tribal. Joey thinks Charlie is more inactive whereas Flint thinks Suzy is more inactive. It'll just come down to what Cassie and I feel in the end. Doesn't hurt us either way since I think they are the weakest links on our tribe, especially Charlie. I don't think she put in enough effort last immunity challenge. Plus, she was totally inactive for this challenge that she auto-lost. Cassie missed this challenge too, but she at least did really well last challenge. If we go to tribal, I think I would vote for Charlie in the end since they are the person I feel least closest to. If only Bradley dropped, I could win this challenge for my tribe and cement my place as a valuable asset.

Lysandre

I am SO SORRY GIGI! I thought you were a returnee so I decided to snap! The comment looked pretty mean compared to the others,  which it was. The tribe, Marie and Kathleen, was wondering who said the mean comment and they believed it was David. I said yeah I think it was him as well. I love accidently painting a target in him and being a rat child.

Lysandre

Ok so I completely missed the challenge! I had no idea it was going to start early and I was at ine of ny sibling's events. I'm rooting for my team and hoping that my absence doesn't paint a target on my back. Also! I am loving being Lysandre! The writer in me is having a field day because I get to create a character and their background, quirks, and personality BUT THEN I GET TO BECOME THEM.

Flint

I couldn't outlast that second Immunity challenge. It was fun but my body couldn't carry on. I hope that Felix can pull through for Tuai! If we have to go to tribal I think it will be an easy vote, for me at least. I think that Cassie or Suzy should go. Cassie hasn't shown much initiative as our leader and Suzy isn't very social.

Bradley

This challenge is taking forever. Im the last one for my tribe. I dont want to lose cuz itll suck and havent been on that much so my soical game isnt too strong either. I just want to beat one tribe.

Cassie

I'm so proud of Felix for sticking it out for the tribe so that we don't have to go to tribal tonight. Plus we still have the numbers advantage, so that is always a positive.

Flint

So relieved we won immunity again! The Tuai tribe is unstoppable so look out! I'm a little jealous that Felix won an advantage but he deserves it and maybe with some buttering up he'll share the information with me.

Felix

Can you believe I have done THAT! I single-handedly won this challenge for my tribe, and got an advantage on top of that. I know why Raul and Kathleen gave it to me, though. If I won and people knew I had an advantage, I would have a big target on my back. It does seem that Kathleen and Raul are working together, so I have to watch out for them. Whether I tell this to anyone on my tribe is a different matter entirely. Though they all know I have an advantage. I think I won't be seen as a threat until later on in the game. I'm still an asset to them though this early on so I hope I would stay if we had to go to tribal in this stage of the game.

Raul

I really did not think I was gonna be able to compete but I got back into it was in the last 2 of our tribe. When it came down to 4 of us 2vs1vs1 we knew we needed to just knock out Bradley and he did that to himself. The best thing to come out was that Kathleen and I grew together plus I'm pretty sure I know the identity of Kathleen which helps cause I love this person. Also there was a individual advantage to be won and Felix had 0 while Kathleen and I had 2. Kathleen and I had decided that Felix could have it but try to work a little magic and make a relationship with him and a deal to work together if the opportunity arose. My smart self realized that that if we just gave it to him it would be announced we made a deal, so I said we continue the comp and just throw it that way it wouldn't be revealed what we were actually doing. This way it keeps this threesome possibility a secret. Whether it remains one or not we shall see. At the very least we aren't going to tribal. Hoorah, 1 point Raul the Snake 0 points survivor gods . . .

Kathleen

"Ohhhh bitch this ones gonna be different from my last one.

David? Trash. Will 100% be the one to go next tribal we go to if I have anything to say about it.

Marie? The sweetest and most opinionated 13 year old I’ve ever met. We love a politically aware teen.

Lysandre? *insert that lady Gaga gif of her going ‘gorgeous, amazing incredible’ ect*

And Raul? I’m sooo glad we were the last two left in the immunity challenge. We bonded AND made an underhanded deal with someone from another tribe. Can you say icons?

Hotel? Trivago."

Bradley

I could still potentially be going home. Since someone brought up the fact that they all talked how they havent talked to me a lot. They do appreciate me doing really well in the challenge and i have Apollo and Brianna wanting to work with me each separately. So hopefully i can avoid being voted off this round and just work on more social connections with them all.

Suzy

love felix but lowkey what if they are doing this for everyone

Boris

"Hello im STRESSED. I went from feeling like im in a comfortable position on the tribe, to the absolute bottom just in one day. Being forced to sit out of the challenge really fucked me up. I feel like the tribe is low-key bitter at me.

And on top of that. We have less than 12 hours to vote someone out. And NO ONE is really talking game to me. Im so nervous. The only person I connect with on a game level is Apollo. I have no idea where the tribe is leaning, but I have a sinking feeling its me.

God I hope im wrong and just insanely paranoid. "

Boris

"IN HAPPIER NEWS. I finally got something GOOD in the idol hunt? And it could be game changing!!!

I found 1 half of a super idol. It can't help me tonight but its leverage, and a super idol is the most powerful thing in the game, it could literally save my life in the future of the game. All i have to do is survive tonight, if I have to use the super idol piece as leverage, I will. "

Felix

I think the advantage is less about doing someone on the other tribe a favor. I'm telling everyone about it because, if I do that, it garners trust because they know I'll be open with them about any advantages I have. Plus, it wouldn't hurt to tell the truth to gain trust. The extra vote could also get me an ally on the other side. Let's see if this plays out like I hope it does.

David

Everyone is nice which makes it hard to decide who to vote off. Performance in the next challenge will base my vote and probably others.

Felix

I think my plan is working. Cassie offered me an alliance with her and Flint. I think those two are really cool so I think working with them is in my best interest. Also, I have connections with Mea through Raul and Kathleen. Hopefully, since I'm giving an extra vote to Bradley, I can gain a connection with him despite not having met him. I hope this plays out well! My social game seems to be climbing!

Felix

I have made my first alliance in this game! It's the Tuai Quad Alliance, LLC featuring Cassie, Joey, Flint, and I. It's basically everyone I wanted to work with since the beginning of the game! I think I have found myself in a good position on this tribe. To be honest, I'd like to see Charlie go first, but we'll see how this all pans out. I'm glad I finally have a security blanket though. Hurray for a good social game!

Cassie

I love being a part of the Tuai tribe and was happy to become the leader. Despite liking all of my tribemates, I've become part of an alliance. We're calling it the TQA, LLC. Maybe someday that can be trademarked, hehe. But the Tuai Quad power is strong with Felix, Flint, Joey, and myself.

Brianna

Well. We lost the challenge. I made a pact with Bradley that we should stick together since we were the last two people left in the challenge. I also talked to Apollo and Boris. I seem to be close to them. Boris mentioned making an alliance with me, him, Bradley, and Apollo and I would be totes down for that. So. Guess this will be pretty simple hopefully

Zest

I just cast my first vote and it was wild. I didn't know what to expect going in to tribal. I hope no one blindsides me because I am really getting invested in this game. I think while my performance in the last challange wasn't the greatest, I can still be a strong social player. Not sure if I'm feeling like Parvati or Hannah Shapiro. I need another few weeks to find out what kind of player I am going to be.

Charlie

I feel so bad for missing the challenge but once again not much new is happening.

Boris

"I have been putting in WERK todah to make sure I'm in the best possible position going into tonight.

I first was talking to Brianna, and she mentioned the only people she didnt wanna vote was me, Apollo, and Bradley. So, naturally, when presented with a majority of the tribe, I suggest an alliance! Ofc she agrees hehe, so now thats in the works.

On my tribe, the most likable people and those I get along with/vibe the most with is Apollo and Zest. I approach them both and plant that seed, another alliance of just us three forms. Im SO excited to be working with them, we bounce off each other really well and I truly think we can go to the end together.

So yeah, even tho I was worried this morning I think I placed myself in a near perfect position. I really don't think theres any way I leave tonight. "

Joey

unfortunately, i wasn’t the best in the challenge but at least i showed up! i was invited in by cassie to an alliance with her felix and flint, but it was obvious i was the last one asked. i plan on being loyal, but i need to let cassie play leader while i get closer with felix. slow and steady.

Thomas M

Not much, Bradley did well on the challenge but unfortunately we are in the bottom. Have been preoccupied with a big assignment so have not gotten to fully experience things in the last round at least. Am nervous of who is going to get booted, excited to see what's to come!

Marie

Wow, idol hunt hates me

Apollo

We lost, I feel like I’m getting played though, if this is the last you’ve seen of Apollo, it’s been a great run!

Brianna

I’m really laughing over Thomas’ first message to me after we lost 30 minutes before tribal....like...it’s a little too late sorry bud

Bradley

It looks like the vote should be Thomas which Im fine with. And theres an alliance of Borris, Apollo, and Brianna who want to make a four person with me which makes me really happy. Started off rocky in this game but with challenge preformance actually helped me a lot.

Apollo

Borris and Apollo? “Name a more iconic duo”

[louistomlinsonyear]

how is smileytatt deleting any better or more mature than the person you’re attacking’ reactions?

well lets see, she was on hiatus bc she was tired of drama, dramna still happened, she thought ‘’this aint it’’ and deleted instead of going post limit almost with tag posts crying ppl were being rude to her and feeding on that and replying asks after asks after asks on the topic she just said ‘’nah no thanks, not worth it’’ and MOVED ON WITH HER LIFE instead of repeating 19827301986301264123 ‘’im gonna delete’’ and never doing it, she didnt say anything, bc she doesnt NEED to cry on her posts saying thats what caused her to delete. tumblr wasnt a fun place for her anymore, a lot of stuff that happened before combined made her just not enjoy this place as much and she left. shes very much active in the fandom (since her hiatus) and has a strong huge ass group of friends and thats enough for her. pretty mature if you ask me, especially considering shes like 21. 

hi nonnie, from bee:

@anon yALL REALLY THINK I DELETED BC OF THAT? HSJDJDKKD I HAVE TO LAUGH SJDJFDKKD love, tumblr isnt fun for you when you’re harassed on a daily basis! im quite personal and i kept quiet about a lot of things bc im a classy ass bitch! i wouldnt even answer my demonic anons bc i didnt want to trigger people that followed me. the fandom in general didnt make me happy anymore either. fandom culture in general just wasnt for me anymore. i went on a semi-hiatus long before any of this high school drama bullshit, i was basically running on queue and that was it, i was just minding my goddamn fucking business. i was barely active at all in that account bc it didnt bring me joy. i enjoyed posting on tomlinsonedits and helping louisource as i could, but my account made me miserable for months. i decided to go on a full hiatus and clean out my following cause i wanted my dash to be just updates of the boys for when i decided to catch up. once i realized i couldnt even run on queue peacefully (i got asks, messages, people indirecting me and all that ANNOYING bullshit while i was literally inactive) i decided it wasn’t worth keeping the account, i was just trying to avoid the inevitable! i already have my wonderful friends and they go beyond fandom stuff. theyre more than enough for me so tumblr just wasnt adding anything to be table. the fact that i have to explain myself is stupid bc technically this is my business and i do whatever the fuck i want. also i deleted and that was it, i didnt try to make people feel sorry for me, i didnt guilt trip anyone, i just... deleted! im not sad, im extremely happy that account is gone, so i didnt see a point in being sad and trying to get anyones attention to the fact i was deleting! i just did! and also i legitimately didnt have a phone yesterday so i have no clue whatsoever abt the drama happening and also i didnt care bc i had deleted before it started JSJJDJDDJFJ like i dont even understand how people think i deleted bc of that when i literally deleted BEFORE all that. anyways im doing amazing sweetie thank u for being that interested in my boring ass life even after i left lmao. to make a long story short: i have better friends and better shit to do than force myself to stay in a place that makes me annoyed and hated all the time 🤙🏼

[burntheupholstery]

I AM SORRY FOR MY INACTIVITY holy shit I should use a queue BUT IM BACK. TEMPORARILY.

HOLY FUCK NIE MING JUE IS HOT

WHY

HOLY FUCK MAMA JIANG IS HOT AS BALLS holy shit why is everyone so GODDAMN hot I’m dying oh no

[animentality]

Controversial opinion.

Gun rights advocates aren't worth talking to at this point. 

I mean come on, guys, you say the same things to them.

They say the same thing back.

You say, "guns are dangerous!"

They say "people are dangerous."

You say "kids are dying."

They say "So? Everyone dies."

You say "we need to protect them."

They say "no we don't, they need to protect themselves. By arming themselves. And learning that the only solution to shootings are more guns."

And it's pointless.

I’ve seen it, every goddamn time. 

Since Sandy Hook. Since Pulse. 

Like Christ, guns rights activists and pro gun control advocates on this site in particular, for the love of fucking god. 

SAME. SHIT. EVERY. TIME. It’s a GODDAMN SCRIPT.

I have a SCRIPT for the two of you, it’s a political comedy, it’s called, “The Wheel of Inactivity.” 

The idea is that two people spin an endless wheel of intellectual elitism as blood rains from the ceiling.

Sometimes one person drags the wheel slower, but it’s always spinning. Always going. 

Blood keeps it flowing even when the two people stop. 

The two people can leave the room, get a hot dog, laugh with their friends, watch their favorite tv show, but the blood is always there, turning that motherfucking wheel. 

Someone on this site once said, if Americans weren't willing to change their gun laws after Sandy Hook, the literal slaughter of elementary school children, then they won't change them for anything.

Well you're right.

You will never convince people that their opinions are bullshit, and their parents and entire culture of warhawking gun waving political circle jerking is detrimental to this species as a whole.

I'm sorry, I know you're going to take this as me being awful.

in fact, im willing to bet you’re already in the replies. 

“So you think we should just do NOTHING?”

“Don’t you care?!”

And if you’re pro gun, you’ve probably already got the word “stupid faggot liberal lol, as if i’d listen to his opinion.”

or if you consider yourself an intellectual or an enlightened fuckboy- i mean political activist, then you’ll have typed out some nonsensical rambling word salad that basically boils down to: “OP is dumb, because I think my opinion is valid.” 

You’ll drag out a thesaurus and some statistics, or you’ll resort to intellectual and political name calling.

you’ll say, “OP is literally just saying our opinions don’t matter, lol, what an ad hominem argument.” 

Well. 

Stop right there, both of you. I don’t care. 

The latter I don’t care about, because I’m used to people spouting nonsense so bizarre that it’s not even possible to argue against since it’s literally founded on no discernible human logic on this site, and i’m immune to it now. 

The former because...and this is more complicated.....

Because this site is "dedicated" to social change or whatever, and feels that I should be passionate and "determined" to always keep fighting.

And all of you, people who know me and people who don’t, will be upset, and say, “So what, you don’t CARE? you don’t want to CHANGE THE WORLD FOR THE BETTER? if you don’t TRY to care then things will never  CHANGE.” 

But I'm sorry.

I'm fucking tired. I'm sorry. I'm tired of being angry.

Being angry hasn’t helped anyone. Not myself. not others. 

you can advocate all you want, but you’ve never really addressed the real problems at the root of all human ills, of the diseased American mentality, specifically. 

You're all just saying the same thing you've always said.

Surface level political mottos. 

slogans, that only make people who agree with you...continue agreeing with you. 

You're not contributing anything to the discourse. No one is. 

We’ve all spouted statistics at one another. 

We’ve all thrown real life examples around like knives.  

We’ve used ethos, pathos, logos, used memes, onion articles, called each other nasty names, and rallied our supporters to back us up.

Never changes.

It’s a war of ideology, with real life suffering and pain attached to it. 

It’s a lived reality of warring ideologies, and it’s really just a cover for bigger problems. 

For problems we refuse to look at.

Problems that are much harder to stomach than “more/ less gun regulations!” 

Problems that question what we are, who we are, as human beings in a universe filled to the brim with things we  don’t deserve to discover. 

Problems that shape not just lives, but the fate of the entire species itself. 

But no, no, those are problems no one wants to think about, or is capable of thinking about. 

They’re problems tumblr has discussed before. Come near. Brushed the surface of.

But it could never truly discuss these cultural, ingrained problems, because it would mean admitting that there are problems in its OWN mob mentality, mob justice, and desire to ensure conformity of opinions. 

So what are we left with?

Surface level arguments.

Class-based. Regional. Moral. 

Every fucking argument has been said on this fucking site, and it’s been said by slime ball politicians to one another for the past thirty years. 

Never changes, the argument. 

And you're not changing each other either.

It’s not like anyone on this site is even trying to do that either. 

You can’t tell me, looking at pro gun advocates, that they’re really trying to change people. They’re just trying to protect their own opinions. 

It bothers them, you know, when you call them pro-murder.

Same as it bothers  you when they call you pro murder when it comes to abortion.

It doesn’t even matter if they call themselves liberals or anarchists or whatever, if they say they believe in this or that.

All that matters is this ONE fucking opinion. 

And why? 

I don't know a single pro gun rights activist who's ever changed their mind, just like I don't know a single pro gun control advocate who's changed their mind.

And that’s important. 

Because we aren't living in an atmosphere of respectful opinions.

We live in perpetual ideological war.

There’s no goddamn room for leeway.

People live political ideologies like lifestyles now. 

Either people don’t give a single shit about politics until they affect them, or they care so much they’ll start sending death threats and rioting. 

There’s no in between. 

There’s no political engagement without people losing their fucking minds, and you know what? 

It’s not even Trump’s fault, this shit has just always existed. 

This dichotomy, between people aware of their surroundings, and people who aren’t. people who are privileged, and are aware of politics, people who aren’t privileged and only care about politics as far as they directly affect how they get food to the table. 

or the opposite, people who are privileged, and can ignore politics, and people who’re so lacking in privilege that they need to be aware of them. 

It’s always existed. 

I think the human brain is just stupid and one-track-minded that way. 

So politics, affecting people outside of yourself, is very much some shit you can ignore when it’s not bothering you.

They’ve just been exacerbated and deeply personalized by what Trump’s brash ass-braying brings out of people. 

Suddenly we have a president who regurgitates whatever fecal urgency builds up in his bowels out his mouth. 

And now we have people who were previously keeping their dumbass opinions to themselves feeling brave.

and you know what, that’s not so bad, because people who’d oppose them are coming out to do it too.

It’s good to have an honest discussion. bring the filth into the light. no more hiding, no more pretending america is progressive. no more pretending america isn’t racist, isn’t disgusting.

bring out the worst you’ve got, so we can make ourselves better. 

but it also sucks because the thin veneer of civilization was stripped back. 

now it’s a war, not a discussion. it’s a battle, not a debate. 

it’s personal. it’s a meme. it’s a life or death situation. it’s “meaningful” philosophically. it’s economically significant.

we attribute so much meaning to these things, and they do have meaning, but what is meaning? 

well. 

we have this horrible evolutionary mechanism we’ve developed to survive.

it’s called culture.

but we also have this thing called maladaptive cultural adaptation. 

you know what that means???

it means humans are so intelligent that we’ve become confident in our survival abilities and refuse to adapt or push our past moral boundaries because we think we’re somehow better than every other species on this planet, evolving to survive.

and thus we keep cultural adaptations that fucking suck just because it’s comfortable, and normal. 

this means that we’re probably going to drive ourselves into extinction.

North vs. south. West vs. east. Regional elitism. Intellectual elitism. Class war.

Let’s all complicate survival, let’s value groups over others. 

Let’s use our amazing ability to organize, to cooperate, and control one another to kill specific groups of ourselves. 

let’s use our intelligence and ability to recognize value in the most warped, twisted, and self-destructive way possible!

Ready? Execution by firing squad! 

All hail human logic. 

We’ve come so far, from shoving arrows up each others’ assholes. now we have nuclear arsenals, perfect for destroying buildings, the environment, and huge segments of the human population on earth! 

space is fucking infinite, and there’s water on europa, but hey, we’re human! we’re so important, we could never drive ourselves into extinction. 

sure. 

ok. 

So GREAT.

Argue all you want, friends and enemies alike, we’ll just all sit here and talk and do nothing until the planet melts around our ears. 

Perpetual ideological warfare is now moral warfare too. Tumblr liberalism deems the enemy amoral in every way possible, complete garbage, monsters, despicable, don’t treat these nutjobs like people. 

White supremacist, gun toting, counter culture, middle class to working class emotionally unbalanced warhawks see enemies everywhere, and a race war coming. 

SURE, guys, THE MOST INTELLIGENT SPECIES.

Kills its own members for sport, loves the tools it has to wipe out its own miserable species with the touch of a button, worships the toys we use to disfigure and dismember our own people, but heyyyy, culture am i right.

that biophysical behavioral adaptation that was supposed to keep us alive, but is actually just driving us all to the brink of madness, then death. 

So my question to you.

Confused follower, or random dude who happened upon my post in the politics or gun control or whatever tag. 

How can you all stand it? Are you young? Passionate? Still believe things can change?

Are you old/older? Believe you’re always right, and everyone else is wrong?

On both sides, are you people genuinely trying to make the world better?

Or are you just convinced you must prove you’re right, to someone else?

Does anyone care, about the children who died?

If you do, regardless of which side you’re on, can you tell me why you’re in the tag, saying the same things you always say?

"this is horrible...ban all guns now!"

"America cares about murder when it's abortion but doesn't care about the murder of literal children."

"this is all trump had to say!"

vs. 

“guns will still be bought illegally!”

“oh what’s next, liberals, you want to ban cars? they’re just as deadly!”

“statistically, this country/ state with lots of guns has LESS Violence than anywhere else on the planet, and here’s why this last shooting really doesn’t matter-” 

you can argue all you want on the internet.

They call you a liberal retard and a communist, you play intellectual and moral progressive elitist, they inevitably snap back at you for being "dumberer" than them.

Am I the only one who's passed the point of being argumentative?

There's so much to be angry about nowadays, I just can't do it anymore.

Being angry is a damn chore and I just don't know what either of you can do, especially on this fucking site.

I just want some goddamn peace of mind before the flood God will inevitably send us for disappointing him comes. 

Lmao. 

God. 

God, please, if you’re out there.

Just wipe us out.

Bring back dinosaurs. 

They’ll create a better world. 

And as some insurance, because I know this post will outrage people on both sides of the Argument, the one I could sing in my sleep, I’ll just end with this:

Anything you could ever say to me has cultural contexts, nuances, meanings, significance. And yet, nothing you ever said to me would matter one bit, if I didn’t speak your language, if I was born somewhere else, raised completely differently, and desired nothing to do with you. 

The only thing that could bridge this nigh impossible gap would be the fact that we are both human. that we share dna, biology, an ancestral history. 

but it doesn’t matter.

because we, the wisest of them all, have decided that it is not humanity that makes us special, or makes our lives mean anything. 

it is not what we are. 

it is not our ability to understand one another. to speak, to express complex thoughts or emotions, to have emotions so deeply meaningful to our kind, and in a way no other species could feel, understand, or appreciate. 

it is not our ability to feel love, grief, joy, rage, fear, hope, nor is it blood, bone, skin, brain cells, the mundane and miraculous concoction of the human biological make up that makes us so perfectly suited for cooperation with one another and nature without self immolation. 

it is culture. 

something we made up, to survive. 

something that is nice, that is lovely, that keeps us alive, still, but is also the single most defining and dividing biological adaptation of all of earth time. 

something which we could remember is made up, malleable, subject to change, but we don’t, because we desire security more than we need freedom. 

that’s what we now use. 

to decide who deserves to be alive, and who deserves to die.

what part of the species is “how all humans should be” and what part isn’t. 

what a species. 

the most intelligent one on earth, huh?

earth really was dealt a bad fucking hand by the cosmic forces that be. 

[acidwaste]

hey so it seems i’ve forgot to do a l o t of tag memes, and i’m lucky i drafted a big bunch of them! lots of questions overlapped so i did my best to answer in different ways, sorry for the lateness! also @ the people that tagged me here, i wouldn't hesitate to kill for you

@natcaptor / @gayspaced

name: leon or lionel!

nicknames: literally the only nickname I’ve been referred to is “big gay” and like. word!

gender: im pretty sure im a guy, i have been kinda 🤔🤔🤔 abt my gender identity since around november-ish though

star sign: sagittarius!

height: 6’1! i’m told that I’m tall but my uncle is 6’7 so...

time: 3:36pm rn! ive been watching video essays and binging music all afternoon

birthday: december 9th!

favourite bands: animal collective, beach house, camp cope, car seat headrest, death grips, fleet foxes, florence + the machine, gang of youths, glass animals, gorillaz, hop along, iceage, idles, kero kero bonito, mgmt, miike snow, modest mouse, run the jewels, superorganism, the avalanches, the cat empire, the go! team, the mountain goats, the wombats, xiu xiu

favourite solo artists: alex lahey, anderson .paak, ariana grande, billie eilish, bjork, cashmere cat, charli xcx, courtney barnett, cupcakke, d.r.a.m, eric taxxon, frank ocean, gfoty, hatchie, janelle monae, jeff rosenstock, joanna newsom, jorja smith, jpegmafia, kacey musgraves, kali uchis, kendrick lamar, khalid, kimbra, lorde, mac demarco, madeon, mick jenkins, mitski, oneohtrix point never, perfume genius, ravyn lenae, rina sawayama, serpentwithfeet, sophie, st. vincent, sza, vince staples

song stuck in my head: caramelo duro | miguel // kali uchis! its a bop, miguel is one of the few singers that can convincingly make sex jams

last movie i watched: deadpool 2! it was even better than the first, which is a feat in itself ngl

when did i create my blog: december 2016??? i only started using it properly in february last year tho

last thing i googled: “im in my mums car broom broom.” dont @ me

do i have any other blogs: yeah, plenty actually!! i have blogs for aesthetic (@moltenstar), general inspo (@wverns), flight rising (@szarising, kinda inactive?), and overwatch (@blackhardts) tbh the vast majority of my ‘sideblogs’ are just saved urls H

do i get asks: when i say stupid shit like “rung has the ass of a dilf but the dick of a cockroach”

why i chose my url: that one panel where kobd have a vacation at the acid wastes because fuck its finally canon babey!

following: 1,767, which is kinda horrifying!!

followers: 890?? somehow??? thats almost One Whole Thousand and i don't even make content

average hours of sleep: around 6 or 7!! n e v e r more though

lucky number: 43 and 64!!

instruments: i'm too poor to afford music lessons or instruments jsbddsjknfs

what am i wearing: a grey shirt and nothing on my bottom half so my [redacted] is hanging tf out, i should put on some damn clothes

dream job:  oooo uhhh, i’m studying to get an education degree rn because i’d love to teach children (around grade 3-4s preferably because i'm too jittery to handle anyone younger and older kids probs won't listen to me as much as i lack plenty of assertiveness), but!! i’d honestly love to be a musician, one of those underground ones that get lots of critical acclaim

dream trip: one day i wanna gather up some friends and just go on a road trip! idm where we go to, as long as we just have fun and just! adventure!

favourite foods: rare steak, mashed potatoes, eggs, and energy shakes made with like. fruit / cheese / yoghurt / oats / chia seeds ! protein is a large part of my diet

nationality: new zealand, but living in australia

favourite song right now: best part | daniel caesar // h.e.r - gosh i need to re-listen to daniel’s album again, i don’t remember this beautiful song being there and that’s a crime

@damndesi / @novarebel / @luciform-philogynist

APPEARANCE - I am 5'7 or taller - I wear glasses - I have at least one tattoo (but I am getting a tā moko in December, I believe) - I have at least one piercing (planning to get a nose ring, like a bull!) - I have blonde hair - I have brown eyes - I have short hair - My abs are at least somewhat defined (b a r e l y) - I have or had braces

PERSONALITY - I love meeting new people - People tell me I am funny - Helping others with their problems is a big priority of mine - I enjoy physical challenges - I enjoy mental challenges - I am playfully rude to people I know - I started saying something ironically and now I can’t stop saying it - There is something I would change about my personality

ABILITY - I can sing well - I can play an instrument - I can do over 30 pushups without stopping (barely) - I am a fast runner - I can draw well - I have a good memory - I am good at doing math in my head - I can hold my breath underwater for over a minute - I have beaten at least 2 people arm wrestling - I can make at least 3 recipes from scratch - I know how to throw a proper punch

HOBBIES - I enjoy sports - I’m on a sports team at my school or somewhere else - I’m in an orchestra or choir at my school or somewhere else - I have learned a new song in the past week - I exercise at least once a week - I have gone for runs at least once a week in warmer months - I have drawn something in the past month - I enjoy writing - Fandoms are my #1 priority - I do some form of Martial arts

EXPERIENCES - I have had my first kiss - I have had alcohol (tastes like shit) - I have scored a winning point in a sport - I have watched an entire TV series in one sitting - I have been at an overnight event - I have been in a taxi - I have been in the hospital or ER in the past year - I have beaten a video game in one day - I have visited another country - I have been to one of my favorite bands concerts

MY LIFE - I have one person that I consider to be my Best Friend - I live relatively close to my school/work - My parents are still together - I have at least one sibling - I live in the United States - There is snow where I live right now - I have hung out with a friend in the past month - I have a smart phone - I own at least 15 CDs - I share my room with someone

RELATIONSHIPS - I am in a Relationship - I have a crush on a celebrity - I have a crush on someone I know - I’ve been in at least 3 relationships - I have never been in a Relationship - I have admitted my feelings to a crush - I get crushes easily - I have had a crush for over a year - I have been in a relationship for over a year - I have had feelings for a friend

RANDOM - I have break-danced - I know a person named Jamie - I have had a teacher that has a name that is hard to pronounce - I have dyed my hair - I’m listening to a song on repeat right now - I have punched someone in the past week - I know someone who has gone to jail - I have broken a bone (do fractures count?) - I have eaten a waffle today - I know what I want to do in life - I speak at least two languages (not fluently) - I have made a new friend in the past year

@smstransformers

age: 16

birthplace: auckland, nz

current time: 4:19 pm rn!!!

drink you last had: i just skulled half a liter of water whoops

favourite song: jesus etc. | wilco if we're talking abt an all-time favourite

grossest memory: accidentally swallowing a bee when i was seven years old (somehow nothing bad happened?)

horror, yes or no: not unless it’s an incredibly tame horror t b h, my threshold for scariness is very low

in love: i believe so!

jealous of people: lots of times, over really dumb things

love by first sight or should I walk by again: i believe that infatuation can exist at first sight but true love not so much. wish that could happen tho :C

middle name: shane!

siblings: my sister is eight years old, and my brother is seven!

one wish: EZ, make my anxiety disappear, i’d have a much more productive life

song i last sang: jupiter | haiku hands

time i woke up: 7:13, woke up immediately because i usually like to wake at 6:30

underwear colour: blue + purble

vacation destination: auckland / kingston / sydney!

worst habit: not remembering to make my goddamn bed, it looks like garbage

favourite food: mashed potatoes….

zodiac sign: sagittarius !!!

@alyonian

relationship status:

at the moment i’m single! and while being in a relationship sounds brilliant, the last two relationships i was involved in? didn’t work out to say the least, lucky i’m still young

favourite colour:

it’s been emerald green for the longest time but orange seems to be dethroning it at a steady pace

lipstick or chapstick:

i haven’t used chapstick since i was six but i probably should use it again, water is my substitute rn fdghdgh - and i haven’t ever used lipstick in any capacity? so i’d have to go with the former

last song i listened to:

the space traveller’s lullaby | kamasi washington - i’m trying to get through his second album rn (i left off on the second disk yesterday) and while everything he makes is undeniably amazing, it’s? a three hour album? i don’t have the attention span for his spiritual jazz, as great as it is

last movie:

monsters inc is playing on the television right now, i’ll go with that! the animation aged kinda badly but it’s still such a fun movie! sidenote: james p. sullivan? a childhood crush, so this gives me memories

top 3 tv shows/podcasts/comics:

i rarely, if ever, venture into these forms of media but! if i had to answer, i’d say;

unbreakable kimmy schmidt / parks & recreation / luke cage

taz / mbmbam (i havent like. watched a full episode of either but they seem cool,)

tf idw / …………. yeah that’s it, i’ve never read anything else. probably should!

additional favs:

my friends, writing (in theory), listening to video essays, learning music theory + instruments and understanding audio production software

top 3 bands / artists:

HHH okay if i had to limit my choices to just three artists, uh. lorde, the mountain goats, and sophie. i couldnt even fit janelle in i hate th is

----------------------------------

@alyonian

color(s): light colors are always nice and pleasant, though anything peachy and sandy are the best! orange (specially pastel orange) is like. the best thing

last band t-shirt i bought: usually merchandising is very expensive and i dont have the money to accommodate that, but like. i do recall having a wiggles shirt when i was five. i wore it all the time, shjdjgsksd im sure that counts

last band i saw live: i almost went to splendor in the grass last year with family, which wasn't only cool since i’ve never been out of the state since i immigrated - the festival was in queensland, which is around a two hour flight from victoria - but the lineup was pretty fuckin lit too! the xx, haim, peking duk, tash sultana, future islands, vallis alps, a.b original,, i was p excited! unfortunately my uncle fell ill and so they had to give the tickets to extended family :( otherwise, i haven't been to a single concert in my life

last song i listened to: street fighter mas | kamasi washington - up to this song on the album and i really fuckin dig this! also the video is hypnotizing

last movie i watched: monsters inc is about to finish and up next is monsters university! which like…. honestly, this is an extremely unpopular opinion but, i like it just as much as the original? my opinion might be skewed because i’m a monster [hugger], but i like everything abt the movie! except for the finale of the scare games and the last five minutes of the movie, both were just. dreadful.

last three tv shows i watched: if aggretsuko counts that’s the last series i watched of my own volition, which is a miracle in itself considering that’s legit only the second anime i’ve watched to completion (the first being shirokuma cafe, which i probably need to re-watch). otherwise, the last two shows i had beared witness to were thirteen reasons why and queer eye bc my cousin put them on! that first show i could completely do without but queer eye is iconique

last 3 characters i identified with: grimlock (legit. all of them), urdnot grunt (mass effect) and vector the crocodile (sth), i’m not sure what this says about me other than Big

book(s) i’m currently reading: i’m reading ‘maus’ by art spiegelman at the moment, for the third time i believe? i believe my classmates are supposed to be writing an essay on this next term and shit, this novel is heartbreaking, i haven't been this emotional when reading a book than… ever, really. it’s a recommendation of the highest caliber

@victorion

name: leon / lionel, i picked up the second name because i was in a server with an admin that was also a Leon™

nickname: besides ‘Big Gay’ i also have the nickname ‘lemon lion’ which is! nice!!

zodiac sign: archer man

height: Tall™

language(s) spoken: english / some maori + italian

fav fruit: watermelons (only when in season)

fav scent: the smell of a freezer tbh? it just smells Nice i don’t know how to properly explain it

fav season: spring! the breezes are welcoming without being overbearingly freezing

fav color: ornge,,,,

fav animal: SHARKS + CROCS + FERRETS

coffee, tea or hot chocolate: tea! with some milk tho

average hrs of sleep: too little

fav fictional character: One character?????? uhhhhhhh……. like. biggest cc right now is either idw skids or oz from monster prom

no. of blankets you sleep with: depending on my mood but i’d say the average is like, 3??

fav songs: i quickly whipped up some songs i listen to

fav artists: i came to the realization that i like acts that are considered ‘bad’ like maroon 5/drake/lil yachty etc in specific doses… i wouldn't call them good yet, but! i have no beef and thats good

fav books: remember ‘where the wild things are’??? that shit was like. literal childhood, man.. :happytears: i really need to look for a copy again

@thonany-klieme

name: leon / lionel, interchangeable really

gender: male, im probs an nb guy

star sign: sagittarius!

height: 6’1

sexuality: gay??? im not sure, im mostly attracted to other guys but i have had very brief crushes on girls + nb people? sexuality’s confusing so im gonna just latch to the gaybel (gay label) for now

lock screen image: its the album cover of 1992 deluxe by princess nokia, tho it was “T Hanos” a few days ago since i change it often - my home screen is venom but his torso says ‘fuck machine’

ever had a crush on a teacher: no??

where do you see yourself in ten years: ideally i’m teaching kids math n english, realistically i’m probably going down with the political climate

if you could go anywhere, where would you go: new zealand!! or the netherlands

what was your favorite halloween costume: halloween is not big at all where i live, the only time i tried trick or treating was when i was like 7?? i threw a bedsheet on myself and pretended to be a ghost, though since there were no eyeholes + the sheet was blue, it looked more like i was just a moving lump

last kiss: never had one

have you ever been to las vegas: nah and i dont plan to?? how do you handle regular days of 40C wtf

favorite pair of shoes: i have this pair of jandals that ive worn for a fair bit longer than my other pair of shoes, tho i only wear them in summer + very warm nights

favorite book: ngl its. ‘the very hungry caterpillar’ by eric carle. i just, love it alot and i cant explain w h y

[smiley-yuta]

stargazing w/ taeyong

☼ requested — yes

a CONCEPT i am here for

sooooo,,, side note.. i’m sorry i’ve been inactive for like the last month schools been a bitch and i’ve been on thanksgiving break for the past week and i’ve legit just had no motivation to write so i hope yall enjoy this and have a great time reading it :)))

plus i’m sick rn so i kinda wanna die????

okay first

how yall got here in the first place

soooooooo,,,,, there’s this astronomy class that both of yall are taking

you bc you really super super duper love the stars and the different ways they work and how they came to be

taeyong bc it was something he had to take for the credits; he loves science but of COURSE the only science course left is the one branch of science he simply cant wrap his mind around

its not that he hates it but its that he hates it

so here yall are

you being the professors star student, someone he absolutely adores and considers one of his brighest students

taeyong,,,,, not so much

in fact hes barely maintaining a c in the class and is on the brink of having three mental breakdowns all at once

he goes to the professor after class:

“plead elleaspelspdlel i need to bring my grade up i cant have a c in this class”

obviously, the professor gets to thinkin

brightest student in my entire career of teaching + desperate student willing to do anythinf to raise his grade = a++++

a match made in heaven

he calls the both of you into his office after the next class, explains the situtation to yall and wants to make sure you’re both on board

he leaves u two alone to chat about different plans to meet up and what yall will talk about and look over at each one

eventually

yall get super close and are super good friends

you offer him moral support before every test you guys take and start becoming the bestest duo after his grades start to rise

finally, the final comes around and after both of you take it and he ends up passing w flying colors !!!! he starts to plan a little celebration between the two of you

hes so grateful you came around and started to tutor him and be someone he considers a long time friend not to mention the little romantic feelings that began to spark in

he started buying little things and planning to bake different treats for you to try

after about a good two weeks of planning and no help from his roommate jaehyun besides a bunch of encouragement about how hes finally gonna smash after those late nights of studying

the guy calls u up and tells you to meet him at around 10 at this specific park

you’re like “hell yeah bby i’ll see u then”

he is on his a game

i’m talking getting ready as soon as he hangs up on you

showering, shaving, getting dressed, hating what he’s wearing, changing, etc

just a long list of events leading up to you arriving at the entrance where theres a trail of little cutout cardboard glow in the dark stars and planets leading you through the park to where tae is standin, waitin for u

ur in AWE

there he is

standing in a button up and jeans and a crooked tie with messy hair like he rushed to complete everything and you basically meLTED when you saw the little picnic he set up

you are about to cry when he comes up to you and hugs you and tells you to sit down and eat all you want and ur legit about to punch youreslef bc hes so fuckitn cute

he puts his arm gently around your body to rest his hand on your shoulder and push your head against his shoulder and yOURE LEGIT BLUSHING SO MUCH MY G O D

he whispers a bunch of stuff about how amazing you are and how much he appreciates everythinf youve done for him

,,,,and how much youve made him appreciate the stars and the beauty of them

but youve also helped him notice you and how beautiful of a person you are

so yall are laying down

his head in your lap while your fingers are playing w his messy hair

you guys are just staring at the sky

he challenges you to a game of finding different constellations and the loser has to buy dinner for the winner

he loses and is all pouty about it

trying to playfully give you the silent treatment to “teach you a lesson”

you play along and soon hes begging you to speak to him saying he was just kidding around

“come on you know i was just joking right hahahha please talk to me i’m lonely”

lots of snuggling

and by lots i mean

l o t s

idk when but you can bet that by the end of the night he’ll somehow find a way to compare your eyes to the stars

doesnt matter how he does it but he Will do it you can bet on it

he’d never want the night to end and would say how much he’d wish he could stay w u :(

of course yall would have to go home

so he’d offer to drive u back to ur apartment and yall would mess around during the drive back

youd arrive to ur place,,,, both of yall bein shy and shit

and then hed reach for his back pocket and pull out a lil flippy jewelry holder and open it for u and its a fUCKING NECKLACE OF A STAR THIS FUCKING DUUUUUUUDE MY G O D

hed spin u around and put it on u

LIKE THAT GODDAMN SCENE IN HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL BETWEEN TROY AND GABRIELLA FUCK

AND HE HAS A MATCHIN ONE THATS A PLANET

YOUD GIVE HIM SO MANY HUGS LIKE OH MY GOSH U CANT BELIEVE UR WITH THIS BABE

soon hed be like,,, “uhhh gtg bye bye lol”

his ass would peck your cheek and run the fuck away

though im sure hed drop something or trip and end up having to stay longer and further bury himself in his embarrassment

yall would just be the cutest kids i cant 

i cant think of anything else so tis the end of this thingy

have a great day guys <333

[autisticteru]

sorry for inactivity

IT’S ALL A PART OF THE SHARK EXPERIENCE!!! APPARENTLY

anyway the main reason for inactivity this time is stamina. it takes energy for me to interact with people and it’s hard to communicate with other people online that just because im making dumb posts and reblogging things doesnt necessarily mean i have the stamina to hold a conversation with them so here i am. gone. 

i need to fucking get my act together but this was honestly MUCH easier when i was in college because...if im being completely honest i really didnt have any social life at all when i was there. like THIS place was my entire social life. probably wasnt healthy for me but now that im socializing in real time since im back home, talking to people online has been less of a need and somewhat more of a chore. WHICH SUCKS AND I HATE IT AND I HATE HOW LITTLE ENERGY I HAVE ALL THE TIME I WISH I COULD JUST STOP BEING FUCKING TIRED!!!! BUT IM SO!!! GODDAMN!!!! TIRED!!!!! EVERY DAY

ugh...sorry if im still inactive after this too but yall deserve a reason