#audio — ( shut that goddamn racket off )

[ltdrunkagain]

y’all can’t tell me that the suffering game ost from the adventure zone isn’t pure hank and connor investigating jams

like someone please replace the detroit ost with the suffering game in their scenes together

@hnkanderson  hey you know adventure zone come over here and agree with me

[lxstfulbeans]

*Busts in with a plastic bag of crack* You want some crack, kids? I’ll give it to ya! 🥸 So Y/N forgot where she placed her phone at and her crush decides to call her phone to help hear the ringtone so she can find it better. However, Y/N forgot that she uses funny ass ringtones for said crush and even has funny contact pics/names for them in her phone. Said songs are “Something about you girl” by Ice JJ Fish, “Wap” but with Carl Wheezer’s voice, “Interior Crocodile Alligator”, and the NFL theme song. I would love to see head cannons of this for Hawks, Dabi, Aizawa and Bakugo.

“Something about you girl” - Hawks. He’s saved as “KFC” and his contact pic is of him making the light skin face that sent y/n to orbit (he thought she deleted it cuz it’s cringy)

“Wap” - Dabi. He’s saved as “Patchy the Pirate” and his pic is a blurred image of him chasing Y/N.

“Interior crocodile alligator” - Aizawa. He’s saved as “Dad of 20” and his pic is of him laying face first in his sleeping bag

“NFL Theme song” - Bakugo. He’s “Boom Boom Pomeranian” and his pic is of a Pomeranian with his hair photoshopped on it.

I know they’ll give some funny reactions! They’ll look at sis confused and she’ll just go “See about that...” and book it when she takes her phone. This idea had me busting my pancreas 💀💀💀

Bruh I- 💀 I’m literally hearin these damn audios as I’m reading this ask, I’m rolling. This is the best 😂

— 3. 2. 1. ACTION!! —

HEADCANON: Y/N loses her phone and forgets that she saved crack-fuelled pictures and ringtones assigned to her crush.

KEIGO TAKAMI [HAWKS]:

You were losing your fucking mind at this point.

Where the fuck could you have misplaced your cellphone?? You had to meet your homegirls at the club for girls night, PRONTO!!

Keigo raised a brow as he walked in on you basically tearing apart your living room for your phone, almost crying from frustration. “Whoa, kid. Ya lose something?” He had the nerve to ask when it was clearly the case.

Sure, there was a whole lotta things to love about this bird-man, but that smartass attitude was gonna get slapped outta him.

“dId yOu lOsE sOmeThInG- YES FOOL MY DAYUM PHONE!!” You huff, throwing another couch cushion on the floor before you fell to the floor in exhaustion. “I got to meet the girls for girls night in twenty minutes, and I can’t find my phone!” You briefly explain.

You heard him chuckle, pulling out his own phone. “Okay, okay, calm down, kid. It ain’t the end of the world, y’know. I’ll just call it and we’ll listen out for the ringtone.” He says, scrolling for a bit before finding your contact, pressing the call button and..

That’s when y’all heard it.

“THERE’S SOMETHIN’ ABOUTCHA GURLL! THAT JUST MAKES MY HEAD WANNA TWIRL!!”

Your ringtone went off under the couch, making Keigo look at you with the most confused face ever, his wings puffing up as he looked at you, yet you couldn’t stop laughing as he used one of his feathers to drag the phone from under the couch.

“What the hell, kid?? I though you deleted this cringey ass selfie!” He whined, looking at the contact photo of him making that dumbass lightskin face that had you howling the other day. “And what the hell is this ringtone?? AND YOU SAVED ME AS KFC??”

“BRUH I CAN’T BREATHE SHUT UPP—“ You screech as you curl up, tears pricking your eyes as you roll on the floor. Keigo couldn’t help but snicker, rolling his eyes at you as he got you off the floor, “Okay, you got some explaining to do.”

“Well, you see, what had happened was-“ You begin, trying to hold back your laughter before snatching your phone and purse, running out of the door. “I’ll see you later, KFC!! I’m running late!”

DABI:

“Aw, damn! Where in the entire hell did I put my phone??” You groaned.

Of course, this wasn’t the first time you lost your phone and you swore it would’ve been the last. But, you were so caught up on multitasking with so much shit you wanted to get out of the way, you completely forgot about your phone.

You sighed as you now have to tear apart the lounge that you JUST straightened up, making this much worse than it had to be.

“Hey, little mouse. What’s with all the whining and hollering for?”

“I can’t find my phone, I’ve been all up in y’all raggedy-ass lair lookin’ for my shit so I can bounce!” You say with an eye roll as you placed your hands on your hips, clearly not in the mood for the bullshit right now.

“Okay, calm down. It’s just a phone, I can just call it and you can listen out for the ringtone.” He said with a sigh as he brought out his phone, dialing your number and waiting for the tone to play. The two of you went from room to room, getting more anxious everytime the phone went to voicemail. You were visibly going to cry, there was no way that you could’ve left your phone anywhere that WASN’T in the LOV Lair.

“I swear, if you start crying, I won’t let you live it down.” You hear Dabi mumble to you as you both entered the last room, dialing your number one last time until...

“NYEOW FROM THE TOP, MAKE IT DROP, THAT’S A WHAP. BRING A BUCKET AND A MOP, THAT’S WHAP”

Your phone was jamming out on a chair, Dabi looking at you like you just committed a grave sin while the ringtone played. The longer he stared at you, wanting an explanation, you can’t help but burst into laughter as you crawl to your phone, and let the tone finish.

You just hoped that your crush was still going to hang out with you after this crackhead mishap.

“MACARONI IN A POT, THAT’S A WHAP. JIMMYY”

Dabi was literally at a loss for words, (lookin’ a lil like confused bakugou rn 👀) as you wheezed in laughter. “[Y/N]... what in the fuck was that?” He asked, you can tell he was serious from how low and menacing your name was said. You were either about to run for your life or die laughing.

“And why the fuck is my name, “Patchy The Pirate”? And what the hell is this photo?” He asked again. Man, was it getting hot in there or was it just you?

“Well, you see here, uh- MOINK!” You shout, howling in laughter as you were chased around the building. Kurogiri shaking his head in disappointment.

SHŌTA AIZAWA (DADDY. ERASERHEAD):

“Oh no.”

“Oh, no...”

“Oh, no no no no no..”

This cannot be happening, this CANNOT be happening right now. Lord have mercy, please let today not be the day.

“Goddamn it, where’s my phone?!”

Yep, your phone. Your new phone that Shōta got for your birthday, who you also had a huge crush on but would never tell that to ANYONE. You promised yourself that you wouldn’t lose this phone, it was definitely the most precious thing ever.

“Fuuuuck!” You whined, already on the verge of panicking while your tore apart your room for that birthday gift. “Hey, what’s all this racket for? I’m trying to sleep.” said your friend, roommate, and crush, Shōta.

“I-I’m just lookin’ for somethin’, Shō! Sorry for all this noise..” you mumbled an apology as you continued your search, swinging your arm around underneath the bed.

“You lost your phone, didn’t you, [Y/N]?”

DAMN, he catches on quick for somebody who sleeps 25/8. Maybe it’s because you don’t really have trouble looking for stuff unless it’s something really important to you.

You sighed, the embarrassment and disappointment washing over you as you laid in defeat on the floor. “Yeah.. I can’t find it..” you mumbled.

The older man sighed, cracking his neck as he got out his phone. “Okay, just calm down. I’ll call it and we’ll just listen out for your ringtone, okay? If we can’t hear it, we’ll track it.”

God, why was he so hot when he took responsibility? You couldn’t help but sit up and nod at his words as he scrolled through his contacts until he found your name, confirming the call until..

“INTERIOR CROCODILE ALLIGATOR. I DRIVE A CHEVROLET MOVIE THEATER.”

Your phone blasted the same line over and over, as hard as you tried to contain it, you couldn’t help but screech in laughter when you looked up to see Shōta’s disturbed, confused, and concerned face as he picked up your phone from underneath your dresser.

“”Dad of 20”?? What the hell type of name is that?” He asked, the iconic sleeping bag worm as his contact photo. The joke behind it was the fact that he was a whole teacher at U.A. You always thought it was cute that he was basically a father figure to those future heroes.

Plus, you wouldn’t stop joking about them being his, “lil chilrens”.

“Aight, aight. I wanna thank you for finding my phone, I promise not to lose it again!” You quickly say, trying to creep out of the room until you were confined with his capture weapon.

“I’m not done with you yet.”

Fuck..

KATSUKI BAKUGOU:

“Hey, dumbass! Hurry up, or we’ll miss the movie!”

Damn, damn, damn!! You can’t believe you just lost your phone right now, you could’ve sworn you left it on your bed before you started fixing your hair in the bathroom.

“Shit, shit! Bakugou, can you help me find my phone real quick? Pretty please?” You call out to him, really anxious because you were really looking forward to this movie and you could not miss a second of it!

“Ugh, are you serious?? What did I tell you about keeping up with your shit!” He groaned, getting out his phone as he dialed your number and listened to the trill.

“I know, I know! I promise I’ll be more careful!” You say as you listened out for it, only to pull aside your blankets to see your vibrating phone with the ringtone on blast.

Oh yes, the NFL Theme. What made you lose your shit was Bakugou’s flabbergasted facial expression as he looked down at your contact photo and nickname for him.

You couldn’t help but cackle as you saw a vein pop out, popping hands reaching out for you. “Hey! What the fuck is this shit?? Imma show you a pomeranian!” He shouted.

“Katsu! Katsu! Relaaaxx!! You know you’re my bestie and I love you, but we got a movie to catch so let’s do this later fam.” You snicker, trying to calm yourself down as you yoinked your phone and took off out the door with your purse.

“OH, JUST WAIT UNTIL WE GET BACK HOME!”

— END SCENE —

Sorry that Bakugou’s was kinda short! But, hope you enjoyed these!

[finsterhund]

Power turned back on at almost 11PM. But I didn't get internet until (when I post this) because roommate fucking refused to properly fix the goddamn router. There's a fucking error that the WAN cable isn't plugged in right. Just fucking fix the damn thing. I'm so mad. If I wasn't making less than minimum wage I'd fucking buy my own router that wouldn't be stuck in his fucking bedroom.

The internet is my only escape from this fucking shithole. Jesus christ.

All this on top of the stupid parasitic shithead landlords I just want to fucking kill them. Make them fucking pay. The world would be better if they were strung up and disemboweled.

I can't fucking take anymore of this.

I only moved to this fucking house because you made me.

"This was the only place" WRONG. You wanted a place that had a bedroom to your specifications and fuck all. As long as they let you have your rabbit you didn't give a single fuck about me getting my service dog when you forced me to move to this place.

That's how it's always been. My needs a fucking afterthought.

Well I'm fucking sick of it. Seems like you only ever voluntarily spend time with me by your own choice when something like this is just about to happen too.

Take me to a fancier place to get food to feel better but I pay for it

I want to fucking die. I want to kill but I can't even kill myself. Today it feels like I fucking twisted my intestines I'm so fucking sick and stressed and mad.

Fuck government fuck borders fuck countries and fuck landlords. We should be able to live wherever the fuck we want. That's how it's supposed to be. Walk someplace new, there's herds here, bam, this is where our troop lives now.

But noooooooo.

Fuck this shit world.

Every time the power goes out it takes five fucking years off my life too. Can't handle this shit anymore. For some reason all the fucking commercial areas of the city still had power but our shitty slummy complex didn't. Huh. Fucking wild that.

3PM the next day update. I know he's awake. I can hear him. The router is still fucking off. Can't even see it now. I am infuriated

He is deliberately cutting me off from my support network at this point.

He has data so he can just access the internet just fine.

I chip in for the cost of the internet by the way. It's not like I'm leeching off his. It's mine too and he just has full access and control over the router because of where it is in the house.

I am so fucking pissed off. Other than the fact that she doesn't respect me and doesn't see me as a human being and all that, living with my mom almost seems possible. Regular access to food, puppy dog who's big enough to actually perform the tasks I'd need them to, just puppy dog in general.

If I don't get internet by 5PM at the latest I am going to (verbally) rip everyone to pieces.

I just want to talk to my friends. I need my support network. I really need people right now. I can't stand it I am in total isolation with nothing. I just want to die. There's no other exit from this. Everything else has been taken from me.

I've physically selfharmed for what is probably the first time in 5 years. An achievement I used to be proud of. But I just couldn't stand not doing it. I did it after I took my meds before going to sleep last night. It wasn't much but it was still doing it. Just fucking cried myself to sleep after that. Listening to music trying to just go anywhere else but here.

I still want to kill. I am still enraged. I want my roommate to fucking understand how much I am in pain. Sick of his flaky inconsistent support.

These cunts could care less the pain I'm in.

Wish more than anything that I could just fucking leave. But I can't leave. And there's nowhere else to go.

All there's left to do is try to sleep

Pretend to sleep

It is now 6PM.

Still no internet.

I'm too much of a coward to confront.

I've just been hiding in my room. Enraged but too scared to do anything about it.

I miss my friends.

I miss my stupid little tasks.

I miss my audio books.

I can hear them both making a fucking racket. Shut the fuck up.

7PM ex roommate tells me that apparently the moden was fried. How the fuck do you

And then it hits me.

My roommate this entire fucking time hasn't had it plugged into his surge protector.

I swear to fucking god.

I am in total isolation at my lowest point trying to argue with myself not to run out in front of traffic and it's because nobody in this fucking house except for me does anything fucking right.

If it'd been in my room it would have been plugged into one of my three surge protectors

Power outages aren't even rare here. What the FUCK

WHAT THE FUCK

WHO FUCKING

There's nothing else to do.

Tried to post on mcdonald's wifi again. Phone died for no reason.

Roommate attacked me (words not physical.) And I'm harming again more worse

If I die though it's an axcident I'm not trying to die.

Roommate put on phone wifi data thing only have time to post this.

Won't be able to make it to TTRPG

Sorry

[ltdrunkagain]

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