#im seeing people pissing on anger management IN THE ANGER MANAGEMENT TAG

[shira-cosmic-star]

hey!

im still in episode 3 of tb but Leo pissed me off in ep 2 broooo

and MC who doesn’t defend herself like 😔😔😔😔

WHO IS HE TO CALL MC A NPC 🙄🙄🙄

anywayy so I thought if you can write hcs with Leo, Tohma and Romeo x MC who outsmart them please ?

I hope I didn’t disturb you 🫶

thank you 🙏

𝓜𝓪𝓽𝓬𝓱 𝓶𝓪𝓭𝓮

Tags: Comedy, Romance, Enemies to lovers(?), slice of life, supernatural 

Characters: Romeo, Leo, & Tohma 

Warning: cursing, seductive on Tohma’s part

 Word count: 2,066 words

Leo:

You knew you weren’t smart in the same way Leo is. However, you were still witty. Often when he would insult you. You manage to always have a comeback. This interaction would go different ways. One, Leo would actually get upset. Maybe mumble, “bitch” after you shut him up. Two, color him impress. He liked the interaction and would playfully bicker with you. Three, he would be caught off guard. It would take him a minute to think about what to do next. Then, a sinister smile takes place. Everyone knows, he is up to no good... 

So, what does he do next? He will do everything he can to get under your nerves. This dude loves to reactions you give him. Although, he finds himself more frustrated, rather than pleased. Why? 

Simple, you weren’t giving him the time of day. You were well aware of the type of person he is. He was basically those type people, who bullies others to get what they want. A pure bully.  

Often when he talked down to you. You would try to handle your anger. Though, as much as you hate to admit. There were times where Leo did hit a nerve. Leo knows what button to press. He often pressed them as many times as he could. But what happens when old tricks don’t work anymore?  

Leo would often insult your friends to get under your skin. Yet, when it didn’t work this time. It displeased him, he tsked as he watched you react to his words like it was nothing. So, he changed his approach. If insulting your friends won’t get your attention. Then maybe he needed to attack you personally?  

He started to insult how you dressed, what you would say in conversations, how you made a mistake on anything and so on and so on.  

Nothing worked, he balled his fist as steam of rage shoots out of his ears. Why don’t his tactics work? He complained over and over to Sho. His best friend grew tired of the constant complaints. Sho was at his wits end with his friend. So, he asked Leo why does he care so much? You were just an NPC, right? So, what is up with Leo being obsessive over you? 

First Leo was in denial. “Me? Obsessed over that NPC? Don’t be stupid.” For a while, he was in denial. He actually loved the witty comebacks you shot back at him. It was smart, creative, and it was like you were ready. There wasn’t a dull moment with you. As much as he hates to admit it to himself. He enjoyed being around you. 

After realizing what this meant. He now needs to figure out how to get your attention. So, the game began. He’ll find creative ways for you to speak to him. He wants you to bicker back and forth with him. But he wants to be on good terms with you too. Everyone knows an apology would work. He’s too prideful, that won’t work in his case. It was set, he was going to challenge you to a game. Loser takes the other on a date. Leo planned to win, and he did. 

Now you were aggravated about the date thing. But you knew Leo wasn’t going to let it go. Therefore, you invited him to the arcade. You challenged him to all of your favorites. Surprisingly, you both were having fun. By the end of the date. Leo asked, why were you ignoring him. 

“I did it because I knew it would trouble you, Leo.” He blinked, “Troubled him?” 

Now it dawned on him. You knew Leo hates to be ignored. So, you played him. Seeing him basically beg for your attention was your planned all along. In shocked and impressed, he looks over to you as you smirked cheekily at him. 

Boy did he fall hard for you.  

Leo have finally met his match. 

Romeo:

You and Romeo weren’t always on the same page. Often, he would yell at you when you don’t understand his abbreviations. When this would happen, you felt exhausted, how on earth were you supposed to know? Even though he would often abbreviate his speech. There were times you did understand what he was saying. You were a tad bit quicker than others in the room.  

When you are at the casino or his office. Romeo would demand you to do this and do that. You were deeply over it. So, to get back at him and make him possibly leave you alone. You came up with your own plan. While making errands for him. You would purposely take your time. He needs a certain document from Professor Hyde? Sure, you’ll get it for him. Although, you’re going to take your time. Oops! You showed up with the papers two hours late? He doesn’t want to hear any excuses. Not, that you had anything else to do. Jin, Leo, or anyone really bothered you that much today. 

If you were tasked to clean his office. You would purposely make even the tiniest mistakes. After observing him and his behavior. You completely knew how to set him off. Why can he clean up his own office? Or his own mess? Or anything really? Pretty boy s just spoiled rotten in your book. As you were cleaning the spilled sparkling wine. You “accidently” smothered it more on the floor. It had left a brutal tough stain. This annoyed him, he yelled at you to do your job correctly. While tilting your head to the side and blinked slowly. You acted innocent and dumb. “Like this?” you questioned him as you made the stain even worse. 

Boy, if looks could kill. You would’ve been dead by now. Romeo was red to the face, a thick vein popped out on his forehead, his hands balled up, and smoke coming out of his ears. He had enough of you. “Enough! How useless can you be!? You’re even worse than that TGA!” You fought hard to keep up the act and not smile or laugh. He takes the rag out of your hand and decided to clean up the mess himself. 

He grumbled on how everyone is stupid and useless. He tells you to get out as he cleans up. In your sweet fake upsetting tone. You spoke softly with a deep fake sigh, “Okay...” His back was facing you. Satisfied, by your work, seeing him on his knee cleaning his mess. You smirked and went home. 

Later on, Taiga went to look for Romeo. When he finds him, Romeo was still annoyed by the whole thing. “Lulu, what got you all angry? You’ll get wrinkles if you don’t relax~” Taiga teased. Romeo quickly turns around and tells him to shut up. “Honestly that new student is working on my last nerve! They can’t do anything right!” His rant goes on for quite a while. Romeo was now finished in his nicely cleaned room. He sat down on his couch and told one of the general students to get him a drink. Taiga, resting on the couch next to him was wearing a smirk on his face. 

“What is it TGA?!” Taiga had a small clue on what happened here. Kitty cat wasn’t a dumb little cat. Oh no, Kitty cat was a sneaky and slick kitten. Color him amused by the antics. “Are you sure they didn’t do this on purpose?” His words held a teasing tone. That is when it hit Romeo. You have purposely made him angry just so he would do his own work. He was angry, but maybe he was impressed too.  

You knew what cards to play. You have successfully won the game. 

Tohma:

This man is hard to break. He’s sharp, too sharp. Most people can’t even tell what he is thinking or what is his next move. You on the other hand love secrets and mysteries. He was a whole book of nothing, but wonders. You wanted to know if you can break him. Would he fall for your tricks? Or would he know your game play? Tohma was always a few steps ahead of anyone. That always felt like he was mocking you. So, it was decided. When you want something. You go and get it. There you were playing a game of chess with him. You have tried asking him questions about him and his personal life. Yet, he would advert the question or smoothly changed the question towards you. So, you changed tactics and asked him the same questions but in a different form. He saw right through it. Now you have to change to pace of the conversation. What do you do? Pick a habit that he does without realizing. Everyone does something without being fully aware. This will be an ice breaker. 

Little by little, you want to break that ice. Your eyes skim over his body to see if you can pick up on any type of body languages. You see his smirk as he plays the game. By looking into his deep sharp blue eyes. That when you began to speak once more. “You know there’s a saying about eyes being the window to the soul?” He hummed, “Yes I’ve heard of that.” 

“I bet I can guess something about you just by looking into your eyes.” You smiled confidently. Ignoring the game, you stand up and strut towards him. He entertained you by letting you come stand by his side. You take off his monocle glasses off and placed it into his breast pocket. When you took your hand out. You left your hand on his chest. One hand on his chest and your other taking his face. Looking deeply into his eyes. You noticed a tired look in his eyes. “You are an intelligent man. Everyone knows that, but you are kind. I can tell you have a deep soul too. You are also extremely handsome, but you feel lonely. Am I right?” You smiled playfully, he laughs lightly and takes your hand into his. “Fluttery will get you nowhere I'm afraid.” 

You giggled and moved to sit on his lap. “I’m only speaking the truth~” It was a bold move, but he did nothing to move you. There was tension in the air. Nothing negative, but something. You played with his hair as his hands rest on your hips. “It must be so hard doing what you need to do. I can’t imagine half of it really.” You spoke quietly to him. Your eyes were gentle and filled with worry. Moving your hand from his hair. You placed it back on his chest. “You really are handsome though. I’ve always had a think for blondes and blue eyes.” He hummed again as you began to move your hands up from his shoulders to his forearms. He was tonally built; you looked back into his eyes and noticed a cloudy hazy look in his eyes. He was feeling strangely hot and bothered. You leaned close to his ear with your arms wrapped around his neck. “What’s the matter handsome? You are all quite all of the sudden.” 

He gulped as quietly as he could, but man. You had a grip on him. He was deeply attracted to you, but didn’t have time to play your little games. Here he was with his guard down. He knew he shouldn’t have let you sit on his lap. But he wanted to see if you were brave enough to make such a bold move. And you did it. You leaned in as if you were going to kiss him. He also leaned in. 

*Ding Ding* 

It was his phone; Jin is calling on him. You removed yourself off his lap and teasingly smiled at him as his answered the call. While you can hear Jin on the other line. You placed your lips to the ear that was left open. You whisper softly, “I had fun playing, maybe next time you’ll will handsome~” Rubbing your hand his shoulder blade gently. You began to walk out of the vault. Swaying your hips side to side as he watched. 

Even the king’s right-hand man falls too.

I'm so sorry this too super long to write. I do hope it is to your liking. Thank you for being patient with me. Please like, comment or reblog. It helps a lot. Love you all my sweet starlings

(Unedited)

[the-kr8tor]

Oh no KATY HELP WHATS GOING ON WHY DO I FEEL SO EUGHEIUHFVHFUHEWFIFGJGB WHEN IM TALKING TO THIS PERSON? Anyways- picking up from last time! (NOT THE ANGST ONE...THE ONE BEFORE) Daily Hobie HC! Hobie held your soft hand in his, his fingers gently grasping onto yours as he danced with you, the place becoming lively as the atmosphere was filled with music, laughter and happiness. Eventually, the place began to simmer down as people grew more tired and exhausted, the night continuing. As you regroup once more with your group, Hobie offers to walk all of you back to the Inns, mainly just wanting to know where all of you were staying for the time being. He waved everyone goodbye at the door, leaving a small peck to the back of your hand as a gesture of gratitude for accepting his offer to dance tonight. Giddy and satisfied, you swear you were tossing and turning with a smile on your face, in your bed, before your brain decided to shut down for the night. You wake up, pawing at your face with a grumble. Oh yeah, fox.. You thought you'd get better at remembering the curse, but it never registers properly in your mind. It feels like you're human, just in a different body. Surprisingly, you woke up before Gwen and Miles..but you can guess why that is, considering they seemed to have 'accidentally' slept in the same bed last night. With a small, mischievous snicker, you gently nudge Gwen's hand to rest on Miles' middle, before hurriedly escaping the scene. You walked out of the room, somehow having opened the door and closed it. Your ears twitched, able to pick up voices, especially those that belonged to Pavitr and Hobie.

The two were talking about how they've been since last seeing each other, with Hobie rolling up his sleeves to show off a scar on his forearm, the two boys being overdramatic with each other. With a fond eyeroll and a yawn, you approach, your claws tapping against the floor. Hobie quickly looks towards the soft tapping noise, his brows raising with confusion as he looks down at the little fox looking back up at him. However, once he met your eyes, he could immediately identify you. Those same eyes that shone so brightly as the two of you danced away last night. He gives you a small smile, before crouching down to your level with a smirk, hearing Pavitr just giggle in the background at your suddenly feigned offence. You puff out your chest fur, raising a paw as if to say 'how dare you' while Hobie reaches out to boop your nose. Hobie chuckles as you playfully chided him about booping your nose, watching it twitch slightly. However, he's curious. How could you have turned into an animal? Were you a shapeshifter? Pavitr, sensing Hobie's slight confusion, quickly explains your situation. How you managed to somehow anger a more experienced, powerful witch into giving you the disadvantage and loss of your witchy power during the daytime. (its the found family telepathy) Hobie nods, his eyes taking in your foxy form. Tilting his head, he flashes you a toothy smirk, teasing on how you must've made that other witch pretty pissed to give you the minor inconvenience of an uncontrollable shapeshift. You scrunched up your muzzle in response. There was no doubt you'd ever be comfortable around someone you'd just met a day before, but Hobie seemed to just have an energy of comfort. Either it was his charming and friendly wit as a bard, or just him in general, there was no doubt that the rest of the group warmed up to him quickly. Most of the days onward that you all stayed in town, Hobie always found a way to tag along. Whether he and Pavitr were showing you the markets around, or just taking you all to the nearby creek to hunt for pretty gems. And surprisingly, he even offered to carry you in your makeshift carrier backpack, which is where you felt the last bit of dignity die. Having to look like an awkward fox as you're being carried by a cute bard? You prayed your fluffiness would cover up for how flustered you felt..and it worked. Hobie didn't seem to mind at all. However, when it was time to go, you didn't pass up the opportunity to ask if Hobie wanted to join them. Seeing you ask, made everyone try to convince him to join..and it worked. Why would he pass on the opportunity of being able to look at you wherever he went? And so you all set off. An archer, a herbalist, a pyromancer, a bard, and a foxy-witch, which is the nickname Hobie had given you with no malice. -🐦‍⬛

I have manifested this and I'm deeply sorry for all the feelings involved lol

Daily Hobie HC!!!

Yayyy our favourite medieval fantasy crew is back!!!

IABSJWIJSJJW THEY'RE SO SMITTEN WITH EACHOTHER 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

That's the dream team right there! They're ready to slay a dragon!

Foxy-witch!! Oh Hobie the man that you are ❤️

[gilbirda]

I fee like people are milking the Anger Management ship a little too often now when there are other ships they can go with. The only Danny x Cass ship that sailed and I’ve seen is in Lex Luther’s Ascent from Supervillainy to Fatherhood 😃 I kind of want to see Jazz and Dick getting closer because of being the oldest and/or Danny and a super kid! Danny x Duke is a ship that no one wants to dip their feet in 😔 they could bond over having powers or maybe everlasting quartet 🤔 (sam x danny x val x tucker) sorry im good at giving ideas out im just horrible at executing them 😭 also, Jazz x Babs? their ship Name could be Oracle Specter? Bc some hc jazz as a liminal and oracle liminal doesn’t sound as good 😀

Friend, I'll be real with you, I don't see the point of this message.

The following answer is not for you specifically, is to everyone out there that has said something similar. I can't just ignore it anymore.

I will say this once: why the need to stomp on something to highlight another? Why start with "I think Anger Management is too common/used/repetitive, when we could be doing this instead."

I'm sorry but this rubs me the wrong way, and I cannot find in me the energy to play nice when it isn't the first time I've seen people stomp on my favorite ship for the sole purpose to try and highlight other ships.

The sad part? I like other ships. Jazz/Dick (Nightbirds), Danny/Cass (Dead Silent) and all those you mentioned are okay.

(Jazz/Babs is Red Dead Redemption, but it can be changed)

Like, what's the point? Guilt trip people into making content for other ships? Make me feel bad enough so I write for other ships instead? I am not the DPxDC ships wizard, I don't wake up one day and decide which ship becomes popular.

I just saw the potential for Jazz and Jason, how interesting their dynamics could be, and run with it. I'm happy that my rarepair has become so popular that it has antis and detractors, it's such an honor to have started the fire that took my OTP out of rarepair hell.

But, please.

If anybody out there likes other ships? That's great!

Now go make content for it.

Don't go into mine, or other writer's, inbox and try to guilt trip people into making content for your ship. Or make vagueing posts in the Anger Management tag complaining about it.

Be the change you want to see.

I wrote nearly 100k words of my ship before I saw other people that wasn't me making posts and AUs about them. Before I saw more fics with that ship posted in AO3.

I just sat down and made content.

"Why are people sleeping on these ships?"

"Why isn't [CharacterA/CharacterB] more popular?"

"Anger Management is great, but I'd prefer if it was done this way instead."

THEN GO MAKE THE CONTENT YOURSELF.

Again, this isn't an attack on you personally, is a PSA to anybody out there being pissy about Anger Management and shitting on it just to make other ships look better or more interesting; or wondering out loud why this ship is popular and their ship is not, behaving as if it were all a plot to make Anger Management more popular on purpose.

Stop that.

Multiple ships can coexist in peace, no need to put down the popular ships unnecessarily. Is not rocket science.

[well-its-not-human-anymore]

TMNT Headcanons

Ah shit, I'm at it again because this is my only current hobby

Y'all I can and will take requests on these if you want me to, I'm just doing these to give my brain the happy juice .

That being said, here you have it:

the boys realizing that you care and actually want to be their friend

Raphael

You wouldn't admit that you'd stalked him to the roof

Absolutely not, you wouldn't stoop that low

at least not that you'd tell him

From the looks of it he was pissed, Raph got a certain face that you eventually picked up as his 'my brothers were being dicks and now I'm not gonna have emotions but I'm gonna be angry about it' face

His shoulders would get all hunched and you could hear his dejected sighing from about seven miles away

So you opted to clamber to the rooftop, gear and all and drop into a crouch next to the temperamental terrapin

"you look like someone lit your favorite book on fire and forced you to eat cauliflower, what gives?"

"well hello to you too huh?"

"I'll take that as a yes then, you get in another fight with what's his name?"

He refused to look at you, letting out an angry huff

"somethin' like that"

You only let him sit in silence for another minute or so before opening your mouth again

"well you being pissed doesn't help me any. There's a gang meeting just up the street, drugs and illegal shit. Wanna tag along?"

Raph had the decency to look appalled. You were offering to hang out with him? Willingly?

Error 404: system has stopped working, plz try again later

He doesn't look at you now, not that he can see your face through the mask, a light blush creeps up his neck

"yeah. Yeah I'd like that. Lets go shorty."

"you got it princess"

Leonardo

He wasn't expecting you to care

The last fight you two had before he had to leave hadn't been resolved yet

But after his slip up during patrol he needed someplace to go so he wouldn't take his anger out on his family

And that's how he showed on your balcony at whatever ungodly hour of the morning

You'd barely pulled the window open before you saw his expression, you couldn't help but sigh

"leo what the actual fuck?"

"I'm really sorry about this, I just didn't know where else to go"

You really didn't want to feel bad but you did, and your feet were really fucking cold

"get your ass in here. You're letting the cold air in."

He settled easily on your couch, seemingly awkward and avoiding any eye contact with you.

You returned to the room with a bathrobe on, an extra pillow and an armful of blankets

"you can crash here for the night, im off tomorrow but don't wake me up before nine or I will stab you. Let me know if you need anything, I'm just down the hall. And we'll talk everything over in the morning, okay?"

He nodded with a sigh of relief

"thank you y/n. And I'm sorry"

You just shook your head with a smile

"I don't even remember what we were arguing about leo. And you hanging here isnt a big deal. I need friends anyway."

Your voice carried through the apartment as you retreated to your own room, letting him settle in

"now go the fuck to sleep, dumbass"

Michaelangelo

Mikey had no idea why you wanted to see him

Especially not with the urgency in your text

Technically speaking he wasn't even supposed to be out right now and he tried to ignore that as he sprinted further away from the lair

He was out of breath by the time he reached your window, the sun nearly gone and the street lights flickering to life

The turtle knocked twice on your window before coming in and yelling for you

"you good angelcakes?! Where're you at?"

There was a startling amount of crashing from your storage room, causing him to jolt slightly when you exploded out of the room with a huge smile on your face

"good you're here, sorry I used the emergency line but I knew you started patrol soon and I didn't want to forget to give you this"

And then you pulled out a tiny binder that reminded him of a scrapbook, however that definitely wasn't what it was because when he opened it multiple organized, clipped magazine recipes stared back at him

Mikey was confused™

At his expression you seemed to explode with a bubble of excitement you didn't know you were capable of

"I remember you telling me that you liked cooking but sucked ass at organizing so when I accidentally ended up getting bored this week I made that for you so you wouldn't have to organize it."

Definitely shorting out his brain

"dude I love it, don't get me wrong here, it's amazing. But uh- why?"

You raised an eyebrow at him, now also confused™

"oh uh- I figured you're kinda risking your ass coming out of your way to visit me so I thought I'd do something to thank you and that was the first thing that came to mind."

The boy is touched and has mentally vowed to die for you, you are too precious for this world

Donatello

Donnie never seemed to understand how you managed to read him in such a short time of knowing him

You swore it was all the reading, spending your childhood analyzing characters because you had no friends made you quite the people reader

So the second the turtle showed up to read with you that night your book became an afterthought

"you're upset. Does someone need to go into permanent night night?"

he'd literally been there for nine seconds and you were already calling him out

"uh no? I'm fine"

You rolled your eyes and resisted a great urge to clonk yourself on the head with your book

"okay that's a fucking lie. Dude you didn't even say 'whats up stranger' when you got here and you expect me to believe you're just fine? Yeah right. Did something happen? Do you need to talk about it?"

The poor guy didn't even get the chance to open his mouth

"say I'm fine one more time and Im adding the moon to my list of favorite planets"

He didn't know what he was expecting you to say but it definitely wasn't that and now he was fighting the urge to laugh

"are you really making fun of my planet knowledge right now? Not very cool of you man. I know at least 2 constellations. There's ursa major and ursa not as major right over-"

"you mean ursa minor?"

"THE MOON IS MY FAVORITE PLANET"

It might've started as a normal chuckle but in under half a minute it had dissolved into that ridiculously adorable snorting laugh he did that usually left him breathless, you laughed along with him, hanging your head and giggling as you did so

"thanks"

You shook your head, slightly dizzy from laughing so hard

"don't mention it. I don't like seeing you upset. Besides, you love it when I get all astrological, right?"

"uhhhhh..."

"this is the part where you lie to spare my feelings Donnie."

"yep. Love the astrological stuff. The best." *Plz insert awkward thumbs up here*

[beomglocks]

soob become human ; c.sb

pairing: android!soobin x police detective!y/n

plot: your job is fairly simple, find out the cause of the recent surges of deviancy in androids. the only problem is that you hate androids, but it’s ok because you have a newly appointed partner and- oh wait he’s an android. 

w/c: 6.3K (this took me longer than it should have)

warnings & other:  enemies(?) to lovers(?), enemies (?) to less hated enemies, based off detroit become human, lots of swearing, android!soobin, human!y/n, blood, dead people, a crime scene is described but not in too much detail, soobin is definetly not a deviant, y/n hates soobin and pretty much all androids, y/n is kinda an ass to soobin, semi slow burn, open ended

you were seething with rage though you somehow managed to contain it. you wanted to hold it in long enough to really explode when you walked into your boss's office. you tramp past the receptionist in the lobby and don't even smile at her. you never do since she's not even a human. you hate how she's programmed to sit idly with an eerie smile on her face and welcome guests.

"hey y/n!" you hear your friend, hueningkai, shout at you. you wonder how he can be so loud and full of energy after 5 hours of working at his desk but you keep marching on, not acknowledging his greeting.

you have your eyes set out on your boss's office and the fire in your eyes is set alight when you notice him sitting at his desk peacefully. thank god, for the see-through box offices cyberlife installed last year.

he notices your figure striding up angrily towards his office and you see him sigh. good, at least he knows what's he's in for! you march up the stairs with your head held high because you were really about to give him a piece of your mind right now.

you stop just at the edge of his desk and rummage through your crossbody bag for something. it takes you a while which is embarrassing since he just sits there looking at you expectantly. "ah," you pull out a crumpled up piece of paper, which you yourself crumbled up out of anger, and slam it harshly on his desk.

"excuse me but what the fuck is this?"

he glances down at the paper and back up at you with a bored expression. "that's a piece of paper y/n." you chuckle bitterly and place your hands on your hips. "i'm talking about the contents of the paper sir."

you watch him open up the paper gingerly and skim over the words printed. "oh yeah," he crumbles the paper again tossing it into the bin. he sighs heavily getting in his serious work position with his hands crossed in front of him. he's a big burly kind of guy so it always somewhat intimidates you when he does this.

"we're getting weekly reports of androids going haywire. everyday i've gotta deal with a new report. i'm not talking the usual malfunction and spilling coffee. this is homicides and assaults. just last night a woman was murdered in cold blood by her android. this isn't cyberlife's problem anymore, these are criminals now."

you stay quiet, taking in what he's saying. "regarding the contents of the paper, i want you to investigate them." you clench your fists and narrow your eyes at him. "why me?" you burst after a moment of letting your anger rise again. you realize you sound like a child whose just gotten told they have to dishes while their sibling goofs off but you don't care.

"i'm the least qualified person to handle these cases plus i've got other shit to worry about! i don't want to deal with those pieces of junk!"

the chief office stands up, eyeing you sternly. now you've done it. "y/n don't piss me off. you know you're the most qualified so don't start with that bullshit. i don't wanna hear any complaints out of you." he doesn't raise his voice and that kind of alarms you but you press on.

"no! you know that no one else in this goddamn precinct wants to deal with these androids so of course, you left me to pick up the dog shit!"

"watch your tone detective," he seethes. he sighs heavily trying to regain himself before he really bursts a vessel. he cozies back into his desk chair and rubs his temples. you, on the other hand, are breathing heavily and pacing back and forth. you can't believe he would put you on an android case of all things.

you were seriously being relieved of all other duties to investigate a bunch of ones and zeros. but that wasn't even the best part.

"i'm assigning you a partner to assist you in the investigation."

you stop in your tracks, eyes widening. "hell fucking no!" you rage. you march back up to his desk and lean over the edge. "chief i always ride solo. ever since i joined i've always been alone and have been doing just fine! i don't need help!"

"y/n i think i've had enough of your bitching and whining. i don't care that you're the best worker in this fucking precinct. if you don't like the circumstances you can hand in your badge right this instant. otherwise, shut your fucking mouth and get back to work," he says through gritted teeth.

you scoff in his face and as you walk out of his office you flip him off. "that's going on your track record detective!" he says matter of factly.

"shove it up yo-"

you sigh as you enter your office. "fuuuuuuuck," you groan. you look around and notice that there's a tiny replica of your desk on the other side of your office. you can only assume it's meant for your partner. the sudden urge to destroy it and throw everything across the room crosses your mind but you decide against it.

having a partner assigned to you was a jab at your pride. everyone knew you as the detective who never needed one, the lone wolf if you will. if anyone saw you being assisted they would immediately think that the position of "best officer" was up for grabs, when it wasn't.

you didn't wanna be that person but of course, you held that title over everyone's head.

you huff, throwing yourself onto your chair which causes it to spin around. you don't even know this supposed partner of yours. most likely for a good reason too. you can only imagine your reaction if the chief had presented your new partner right then and there. a firm knock on your door startles you, "come in," you mumble. you're really not in the mood to entertain any of your work friends so you hope this is quick.

you look at the figure standing idly by the frame of the door. he's tall with a three-piece suit on. he's oddly handsome with little to no flaws which is suspicious to you. his hair is dark with hints of blue peeking out and it's pushed back to show his forehead. the stark contrast of his dark hair and fair skin makes him look very pale and almost sick. he has some files in his hands and his face is stoic, almost emotionless but not stern. he looks boyish.

what you don't notice is the ring of light located on his temple since it blends in so well with his skin. "how many times do i have to tell people that complaints are sent next door to hueningkai, god i really need to get a sign or some shit," you groan rubbing your face in frustration. you lower your hands and the person is still there.

"hello, my name is choi soobin. i'm the android sent by cyberlife to assist you with your detective duties," he states monotonously as if he's reading from a script.

the gears in your head churn for a while but once the words process you groan once again and roll your eyes to the back of your head, "why am i not surprised that chief would fuck me over even more like this. of course my partner is a fucking andriod." soobin steps completely into your office shutting the door behind him. "are you y/n?" he asks politely.

"un-fucking-fortunately."

"nice to meet you!" he seemingly ignores your sarcastic comment and your wonder if he even knows what sarcasm is. "i hope we can be good partners. i have already received the files on our first case together, here they are," he places the files on your desk and you can only look up at him in disgust.

"well you're a well-trained dog arent you?" you mumble. "y/n with all due respect i am not a dog. im an android designed by cyberlife to merely assist with certain tasks and finish my mission. i'm one of the most advanced of my kind." you look at the tag on his suit: KR900. you sigh, nodding, "got it got it, now if you'll excuse me, it's time for my daily nap so scram."

you lean back in your chair and close your eyes. man, if soobin was gonna be your partner you'd have to extend nap time by at least 30 minutes. you wonder if you can get away with adding another hour to your naptime.

you hear someone clearing their throat beside you. you hope that if you keep your eyes closed they'll get the hint to leave you alone. after about a minute the person speaks up, "y/n we should probably start with the case as soon as possible." great, soobin.

you open your eyes to glare at him. "listen, soobin? was it? go fuck yourself ok?" you close your eyes again and fold your arms over your chest. god, soobin's already being a nuisance. you're not sure if whatever this is is going to work out.

he stays silent for a moment and you wonder if he can feel the feeling of frustration. you hope he can because he might be able to get a sense of how you felt towards this whole situation. you start to drift when you feel an odd warmth radiating on the side of your face.

"with all due respect detective. i've been assigned to this mission and i intend to carry it out and complete it to the very end. i'm not going to sit around and wait for you to simply 'feel like it'."

your eyes fly open and you stare at him bewilderedly. he's very close to your face and his expression is stony but of course, he still has that boyish look.

you stand up, frowning at him. "let's get one thing very straight, tin can." you shove your finger into his chest which strangely doesn't feel too much like hard metal. "i call the shots around here so i won't be taking orders from a walking computer. i don't give a damn if you're leagues smarter than me, piss me off one more time and i won't hesitate to deactivate you myself."

you step away from him and he doesn't seem affected. he simply brushes his suit off. you scoff, grabbing your keys from your desk. "by the way i already know where the crime scene is so try to catch up next time, puppy."

when you both arrive at the crime scene there's already a plethora of police with their hound dogs and the yellow barricade tape is being set up. this must've been a pretty brutal scene for there to be this many people dispatched to this location. you're not surprised that there's people here and there trying to get a sneak peek at what might've happened.

"y/n! y/n!" you hear someone frantically yelling out your name.

you look around and see yeonjun, another police detective who's not from your unit, running up to you. he engulfs you into a bear hug, letting his trenchcoat pick up from the wind. you smile for what feels like the first time today, "hey yeonjun." once upon a time you liked choi yeonjun, you still do in a way. he was always on top of his game which you admired and you two would always compete when it came to cases. he was unbelievably smart so he probably knew about your little crush on him. if he did, he never addressed it and still treated you like a close friend.

"it's weird seeing you at the scene so early, we're just finishing setting up the yellow tape," he smiles at you but you can see his confusion. you were known to be late to these scenes but somehow still did well and always cracked the case. you didn't like to be around all the other police and detectives when you were in the zone.

"chief assigned me a new partner who insisted i arrive accordingly," you roll your eyes playfully to mask the annoyance. you don't bother to introduce soobin, who had been standing behind you silently this whole time, because he introduces himself. "hello, my name is choi soobin. i'm the android sent by cyberlife to assist y/n with their detective duties," he says monotonously.

yeonjun stares at soobin with an impressed look, "woah, chief got you a robot? he must love you" he jokes. "love me? this is a shit way of showing it," you mumble.

"y/n ever the comedian," yeonjun laughs deeply. you smile shyly at him. "i guess..anyways what's the scene looking like?" yeonjun leans back on the barricade looking back at the house you have yet to enter.

"looks like another case of deviancy to me," he sucks his teeth in thought. "man these androids are really going haywire these days, killing their owners, assaulting them, or just simply running off. seems like some kind of uprising? the machines seem to be rebelling," he glances at soobin who is already looking at him.

yeonjun chuckles lowly and leans down towards your ear subtly. "be careful ok?" he leans back up and stretches his arms. "trust me i know," you mutter. you both smile at each other and he winks at you. "well i'm off to do my own sleuthing! let me know if you find anything, you always do after all."

you watch him jog off and sigh to yourself. you turn to soobin, "right, let's get on with it." before he can take another step forward you stop him in his tracks. "and don't get in my way." soobin nods but stays silent. "i'm gonna need a verbal answer," you really don't care if he answers you or not you just want to annoy him. "i will do what i need to, to complete my mission," he looks at you with a weird glint in his eye and you kinda hate him even more now.

you roll your eyes and walk through the door of the house you're meant to be investigating. the smell of booze and musk smacks you in the face and you have to physically hold back the bile rising up your throat. "

"man whoever lived here was a pig!" you gag. you look back at soobin who has a neutral but curious face. "right you can't actually smell things," you mumble. you grab the collar of your jacket and cover the bottom half of your face with it.

as you walk deeper into the house you start to really see what went down. glass covers pretty much the entirety of the floor from a window near the tv. the tv is busted and there's writings on the wall. you look around the living room and that's actually when you discover the body.

it seems to have been there for a couple of days now since there's maggots hovering over it. the man's face is beaten badly and blood runs down it onto his tattered shirt. he's slumped over and there's blood on the wall that states 'we are alive'.

"jesus christ," you mumble to no one in particular. you watch soobin hunch over the body and dip his finger into the blood on the wall near it. he's about to bring it near his mouth but you stop him. "god what the fuck are you doing!" you think the bile you were holding back is really about to come out and you're scared you'll ruin the crime scene.

he looks back at you with an unreadable expression. "im analyzing the blood." he turns his back to you again takes a lap of the blood. "you're fucking gross," you chastise.

"the blood is from the victim," he finalizes. "damn his android must've really wanted to make a statement here. 'we are alive'? what do you think that means?" you ask him.

soobin stands up straight again, looking around the flat, "deviancy of course. judging by the looks of it, this wasn't a very habitable place. the android must've gotten fed up and rebelled against its owner." he thinks to himself. "this shouldn't be happening, it must be some kind of virus because androids were only meant to serve, they shouldn't have to capability to harm much less kill."

you sigh, already hating where this case and the mission overall is going. "let's just look around for clues. i doubt the android could've gotten far, it must feel guilty or something."

soobin shakes his head, "androids don't feel y/n." you raise your brow at his statement, "one does not simply kill another being without feeling. an emotion or feeling of some sort is triggered which causes someone to act out in this way."

you walk away to the kitchen to look for clues there but soobin just stands there watching you. he frowns but joins you minutes later.

after about a half hour of looking for any clues, you've managed to gain a lot of evidence with soobin's help. there had been a struggle in the kitchen which led to the living room where the place of death was determined. soobin described the altercation as very brutal for both parties.

"so where's the android?" you ask after his explanation. "it's near," he mumbles. he surveys the room once again and spots something. you watch him do the same procedure he had done with the victim's blood. "there's nothing there," you say skeptically.

"it's android blood, or blue blood as you humans call it. not visible to the human eye but any android can spot it from a mile away."

when he's done he looks around once again and follows a sort of trail. he stops near the attic door and sighs. he pulls it open with caution and you can only wonder what he's up to.

he peeks in then hoists himself up into it. "wha-" "stay here," he demands. "hey what did i sa-"

before you can scold him he's already in the attic and slammed the door in your face. "didn't know androids had a prick feature," you mutter.

after 5 minutes you start to hear noises of struggling and things falling over. "soobin?" you shout. "what's going on up there?" you don't actually care if he's ok or not but one scratch on him and you'll be paying the damages.

he doesn't answer, instead, the struggling comes to a halt. you jump as he slams open the attic door. you give him a once over and it doesn't look like he has any scratches on him so you sigh to yourself gratefully. looking down you see an android wriggling in handcuffs, you assume it's the murderer. "i got him," soobin huffs.

"y/n? you in h- woah," yeonjun breathes out. he looks over the both of you then at the android on the ground near soobin. "damn." you nod, agreeing with his one-word statement. soobin folds his arms looking down at the android. the android is rightfully glaring back up at him. "he was hiding up there, probably thought no one would find him. well, no human would've at least."

"we should take it back to the station for questioning. the more info we get out of it, the closer we are to figuring out the cause of this 'deviancy'," yeonjun concludes. you nod, turning to soobin, "good job puppy." he makes a face but accepts your praise either way.

after finalizing your first deviant case, you decided to ask yeonjun out for burgers two days later as a celebratory measure. he had told you he was going to be busy filing some other cases so you opted for going alone. alone is not entirely true since soobin was required to be around you at pretty much all times.

"stay in the car," you ordered. "not happening. im required to assist you at all times," he states matter of factly. you lean your head on the steering wheel. "god you are so up my ass it's annoying."

"listen if i say do something you do it. you're an android so you follow my orders got that?" you narrow your eyes at him as if to challenge him. he simply looks back at you with that boyish curious look and says nothing.

you hate how he looks like a puppy who knows you're hiding a treat behind your back.

you sigh, getting out of the already parked car. you slam the door roughly in what you hope to be soobin's face to make a point but you hear a door close right after yours. you turn around to see soobin standing outside of the passenger's side where he was seated.

"oh fuck off!" you shout exasperatedly.

you stomp over to the burger cart and shove past someone who's already there. "hey watch it!" they shout. "shut up im a cop," you bite back. you don't even bother turning around to the person because you could care less but their voice comes back. "y/n?"

you perk up at your name and turn around, "oh shit frankie!" your smile grows and you hold your hand out for a handshake but frankie goes in for an uncomfortable hug that you weren't expecting. you laugh nervously as he hugs you for longer than intended. he reeks of red dust, a newly manufactured drug in town. the only recognize it is because, well, you've tried it.

"hahah ooook franks," you try to wriggle from his tight hold on you but he doesn't budge. "i slipped a little something for you sweet cheeks," he murmurs into your ear. you shiver from the sudden close proximity but nod nonetheless.

"is there a problem here?" soobin states. he easily towers over frankie since taking drugs for a long time has ruined frankie's growth spurt. he's by no means short however soobin is winning in height by a long shot.

frankie chuckles lowly, "we're fine robocop." he rolls his eyes at soobin and turns back to you, "so anyw-"

"y/n we should be on our way," soobin narrows his eyes at you and you don't take it as a question. you're not scared of soobin however he's pretty much unmatched when it comes down to it.

"right," you say slowly. you glance between frankie and soobin and they both seem to be in a bit of a staring contest. "come on puppy," you nudge him.

"have a nice day," soobin says firmly. "whatever, damn androids," you hear frankie mumble. you sigh as you both reach a stray table near the truck. you open the wrapper, uninterested in everything else at the moment until soobin clears his throat.

"drugs?"

"what about them?" you mumble through a mouthful of burger. "you just got drugs from that guy," soobin leans on the table staring at you directly in the eye. you sigh dramatically, throwing your hamburger back into the wrapper. "leave me alone ok? if you're gonna lecture me i can assure you, i don't want it."

you pick your burger up again hoping that soobin will just shut the fuck up for the rest of the day. he really has a way of putting you in a sour mood. you wonder for a moment how long you'll have to be working with him. if you can just figure out the cause of deviancy then this little arrangement will be over before you know it.

from that point on, soobin simply watches you eat. it's a bit uncomfortable, to say the least, but at least he's silent. you want to question him as to why he's watching you so intently but you also don't feel like chatting with him. "did you ever expect to be living among androids y/n?" soobin speaks up after a while. you smirk at his question, "you're living among us, ok? and no, i never saw it coming." you feel bitter about his question.

of course, you never expected it. you never thought you'd see the day where an android is running the hotdog stand down the street. you never expected a robot to be doing your job. "you fucking androids are a curse," you mumble. soobin says nothing at that.

the ringing of your phone cuts through your little moment. you sigh, rummaging through your pocket for it. groaning, you reluctantly answer the call. "what's up boss."

after a couple minutes of briefing, you hang up. soobin looks at you expectantly while you throw out your trash. "we got another one, pretty close to where we are. no one else is on duty near us so we'll be on our own for this one."

you brush past him, walking back to the car, "think you can handle it puppy?" you don't expect him to answer but you're surprised when he retorts with his own witty remark.

"i'm practically designed too."

you stifle a laugh, shaking your head, "alright alright let's go."

once you arrive at the apartment complex where the deviant is supposedly located, you stop soobin right at the door. you stare up at him with a stern look in your eye, "remember what i said, no getting in my way and no telling me what to do. remember that i'm also your superior."

a part of you feels like you don't necessarily have to tell him these things since he probably stored that information from the first case. however, you want to feel power over him. you don't care if soobin is an android, you'd be damned if he felt like he was superior to you just because you were a human and he was a robot.

"i will do what is needed for me to complete my mission," he states. you roll your eyes at the answer he opts for but nonetheless continue onward. "we gotta be careful here, we don't actually know if the deviant is armed."

"you got sent any info on the guy?" you ask. soobin sighs, "the only thing we know about him is that he's a deviant. the people living on the floor below claimed they were hearing strange noises but supposedly no one has lived here for years."

you chuckle to yourself, "yeah it sure looks like it." you look around, taking in the beat-up state of the hallway. it's dimly lit and the walls are tattered and torn. there are boarded-up doors and the floor almost looked like it would give in with anymore added weight. yeah, there definitely hadn't been anyone inhabiting this floor in a while.

you lean on the door frame as you watch soobin knock on the door as a normal would but no one answers. "is anyone in there?" he shouts. you both wait for a moment but again no one answers. you sigh, shaking your head. "move."

soobin steps out of your way hastily and moves to stand behind you. you swiftly take your gun from it's holster on your hip and shoot the door handle. the handle flies off and just like that the door creeks open. you'll admit there might've been a more suave way of doing it that didn't involve much noise, however you wanted to get this over with.

you motion for soobin to trail after you into the apartment. you both slowly inch into the flat and you peek your head in to check if anyone is inside. when you confirm there's no one in the apartment you both walk in cautiously. the place is completely torn apart. there are bird feathers all over the place and the walls have odd writings on them. you sigh walking up to one of the walls, "we are alive."

soobin shakes his head but says nothing. "let's check the other rooms in this place," you propose. you both split up to look for clues about the deviant which gives you time to think.

soobin goes to snoop around in the closet while you head to the bathroom of the apartment. the sink is riddled with bird feathers and bird shit. you hold your breath as you look around the small room. the place definitely hasn't been kept up by anyone in a long time. "ra9?" you mumble. you lean closer to the wall to inspect the odd writing. it's not just written once or twice, it's scattered all over the wall. "what the fuck does that even mean."

before you can even begin to infer, soobin walks into the bathroom. "i think i found something." you sigh looking up at him, "what is it."

he leads you back into the living room and points to a birdcage on the floor. "this must be what caused that noise that the people on the other floor sent complaints about." he paces around the room for a moment. "i should be able to reconstruct what may have happened, that way we can know where the deviant went."

you watch silently as he walks back to the birdcage. he stays still for a moment then proceeds to look around the room in all directions. "see anything?" you ask.

he doesn't answer, much like last time he simply stands up and walks towards an opening in the roof. soobin slowly reaches his hand up to it but someone jumps out at him.

soobin is effectively knocked to the ground and you stand there shocked. you were really not expecting anyone to be up there. you shout in alarm and the deviant is alerted instantly. before you can reach your gun, the deviant haphazardly pulls a gun of its own from is pocket.

it's clearly not skilled in holding a gun since androids aren't allowed to bear arms. you can tell it's not sure where to shoot and it's scared. you can feel the cold metal of your gun graze your fingers but you stay still as you hear a gunshot pierce the air.

your eyes widen as they follow the deviant run out of the apartment. "SOOBIN GO," you shout. you're not sure why you're telling him to chase after it when you can do it yourself but you feel like you can't move. you suddenly feel yourself collapse on the ground, letting out a strangled yell. "FUCK!"

"Y/N?" you hear soobin shout. for some reason everything is hazy and all you're hearing is white noise. you think you yell at soobin to chase after the deviant again but even in your hazy state, you can't quite tell. after a couple more seconds of struggling to comprehend what's going on, you finally pass out.

you shift around, looking for a comfortable position on the couch. you're not sure why you're on a couch but you're not complaining. it feels like forever since you've felt like you've had a chance to rest for a moment. you're starting to really get sick and tired of androids. before all of this, all you did was either sit on your ass all day or go around helping the elderly or bust your local neighborhood scum. you seriously couldn't believe how much your life could change in just the span of a couple of days.

speaking of change, soobin was going to have to go. he's a pretty capable partner however, you both clashed too much. granted you haven't given him much of a chance. you just hated the concept of having a partner, much less an android partner.

you suddenly feel something cold press onto your leg. you hiss out in pain but when you try to move your leg the pain gets worse. "you shouldn't move," you hear a voice say. you furrow your brows because you're sure you live alone.

you peel your eyes open and see what looks to be soobin standing over you. "soobin?" after the name registers in your head your eyes widen and you try to sit up but the pain in your leg keeps you in place, "what the fuck are you doing in my house?"

soobin calmly takes a seat on the seat opposite from you. you study his body language and face. if you didn't know any better you say he seems a bit distressed. you want to laugh at yourself for thinking that because there's no way an android can know what distress feels like. he seriously looks like he's racking his brain to figure out what to say first.

"you got shot," he opts for. your mouth falls open, looking down at your leg. almost as if on cue, you start to feel immense pain shoot through your body. "fuck fuck fuck!" you yell. soobin rushes up to press the ice pack down on the bandaged wound.

"don't fucking touch me!" you yell at him. he flinches back but you don't notice because you're too busy trying to dissolve the pain. you breathe in and out. you wouldn't say you've never gotten shot before but no bullet has ever successfully hit you. you've only been grazed here and there but it was rare since no one is allowed to really carry guns besides cops.

after doing your breathing exercise for a couple of minutes, you finally bite back the pain. "what happened to the android?" you grit out. you hope getting shot was worth it, you hope the bastard that shot you in rusting in his cell. soobin sighs, "we lost it. it's completely my fault. i should've chased after it."

"you didn't chase after it?" you're not sure if you sound surprised or angry but soobin looks up at you like a scolded puppy. the alarms in your brain are blaring right now. why did soobin ignore the mission? he was supposedly always supposed to complete his mission no matter what. surely he didn't ignore the mission simply because you collapsed from a leg shot. you think about the subtle warning yeonjun gave you back when you had your first deviant case.

"seems like some kind of uprising? the machines seem to be rebelling."

soobin isn't- he's not a deviant is he? you can't really remember if he's been defective this whole time or if he's the best actor you ever met. you look up at him suspiciously and he shifts his gaze subtly when you make eye contact.

"it's been 4 days since your injury. yeonjun came by a couple of times to check up on you," you see his fists tighten at that. something may have happened between them while you were out. you know yeonjun can be a bit overprotective over you at times, even when he knew the job was dangerous.

"the chief says its best to lay low for a couple of days until you get better so that's what we're doing," he continues. you stay quiet. you're not exactly sure what to say. you don't know if calling him out will anger him or something.

you both stay quiet for so long that you start to think soobin may have gone into hibernation mode or something but when you look up at him he's staring directly at you. you sigh, "what is it this time puppy."

he stares at you for a little while longer before answering, "why don't you like androids?" you should've known this question would come up but damn why'd he have to ask it right now. why do you hate androids? one just shot at you a couple of days ago and left you unable to work.

"it's' because you're all nuisances," you mumble. he looks down at his hands and you have to remind yourself that if you're right, he somehow has feelings now.

you groan, "you all are supposed to be perfect! better versions of us humans! i guess you just fail when we put too much trust in you." you sigh, you don't expect soobin to understand since you're being too vague.

he sits, waiting patiently for you to continue. "someone close to me passed away a long time ago. i don't really expect you to understand what grief is," you chuckle bitterly. you look around the room in silence. you don't really want to cry right now so you take a deep breath.

"the doctor was out, probably fucking around i don't know. they had an android do the job. they didn't make it because the android failed to do it's task." you shake your head. "yeonjun was there for me at the time, which im grateful for. i probably would've singlehandedly destroyed all androids myself if he wasn't there."

soobin looks at you with that same curious boyish look and it makes you want to hit him. he's so annoying even when he's not doing anything. "y/n im sorry," he says.

"yeah you should be. the deviant got away because of you," you mumble. you both sit in silence again until you decide to speak up again. something in you wants to thank him for not leaving you behind but you also don't want to break character.

this is too new to you. you've never really had a partner, only ever going out into the field with yeonjun. even then, whenever either of you got hurt it was never as awkward as this. you sigh, "at least you didn't leave me behind." is the best you can come up with.

soobin looks up at you again with a hopeful look in his eyes and it makes you hate how alive he looks. if he was really a deviant you'd have to tread lightly with him. you're not sure if he's plotting against you or what his goal is but you've gotta start being more careful around him.

"y/n i look forward to working with you more," he says lightly.

for now though, for now, this will have to do.

[klanceficatalogue]

Hi! I just wanted to ask if you have any more pining lance, preferably where lance pines first..

yupp! im such a sucker for single pov pining fics - karri

pining lance tag

A Teeny Little Problem Called Love by Loverboy_Lance (1/1 | 8,866 | Teen And Up)

Lance is sad that Keith left for the Blade of Marmora. He's managing things until he finds out Keith has gone missing, which causes him to get pissed off and go looking for him. After finding out his last known coordinates were at the edge of an asteroid field, Lance realizes he's the only one with a lion nimble enough to get through. He has to go looking, he has to know what happened. Basically, this is my take on what would happen if Lance was on the space whale with Keith instead of Krolia.

//insecurities

Beautiful by Insomniac_with_dreams (1/1 | 4,976 | Not Rated)

There were times, normally far from appropriate times, when Lance would be hit with the realization that Keith is beautiful. Such a time has to be right now, as Keith yells at the people sitting around the table to stand up and fight for themselves. It’s silent as Keith leans forward his voice breaking with despair that you had to know him to recognize. His eyes are fiery and full of tears, brimming with frustration and anger at himself and at the insensitive behavior of the people. His hair flies from his face and Lance swears he sees Keith’s teeth sharpen.

or

Five times Lance thinks Keith is beautiful, One time he tells him, and One time Keith tells Lance.

//self-harm 

(past allurance)

Like Lightning in a Bottle by heavenlyfires (1/1 | 2,050 | Teen And Up)

Suddenly their faces are so, so close, noses brushing, breaths mingling. Lance inhales, lips parting in surprise. He doesn’t even think about it. He just feels the ghost of Keith’s breath over his mouth—and he’s so, so in love—and he tilts forward to press their lips together.

It’s soft, sweet, quick. It lasts barely a couple seconds before Lance comes back to himself and pulls away, eyes wide and worried. His chest collapses in a whirlwind of indecipherable emotion— he just kissed Keith, he should be overjoyed. And he is. But he’s scared more than anything.

Keith’s eyes open. His face is slack, surprised. He looks… blindsided. Like he’s just witnessed the impossible. Like his whole life has been turned upside down.

//biphobia

[thiccpettybitch]

Made For Loving You Baby

Here is my Porter Gage/Fem! Sole Survivor Fic. If im gonna be honest this is one of (if not THE) fic i am most proud of? It just kinda...worked out so well atleast so far lol. So here is chapter one, if you wanna read the rest you know what to do! AO3 

(like always most if not all of my stories are 18+ everything from sexual content to gore, murder blood and everything inbetween, if you’re not comfy with it i’d suggest you stay away. If you are more interested in what the tags are click the link above) 

’’What. The. Fuck’’

’’Boss?! Ya’ mind knocking?!’’

‘’Not if it’s my own fucking quarters’’

‘’Right, Shit, I’m sorry Boss’’

‘’Boss? You taking orders from some kid now Gage?’’

‘’It ain’t like that’’

‘’The fuck you just say?’’

‘’Woah! Boss relax she didn’t mean nothing by it’’

‘’The hell I didn’t’’

‘’Take your chem whore and get the fuck out Gage!’’

‘’Jealous bitch?’’

‘’Jenni don’t-‘’

‘’You know what? Just fucking stay. I’m outta here’’

‘’Boss wait! Fuck…’’

Gage scrambled for his pants and almost tripped over his own feet as he tried his best to pull them up and walk at the same time.

‘’Gage what the hell? You’re just gonna leave me here?!’’

‘’J- just grab your shit n’ meet me at the bar. I gotta fix this’’

It took what felt like an eternity before the damn elevator finally arrived and he was able to get in it. She was already half through the park, he knew it. He had seen how fast she could storm off if she was pissed off enough and this time she was just about ready to kill someone… more than usual that is.

His heart was pumping wildly in his chest and for the first time since all that bullshit with Connor he was scared. Sure Colter had been fucking crazy when he got pissed off, killing and hurting anyone or anything that got in his way but things were different with-

It hit him like a fucking brick wall, he didn’t know what to call her besides Boss, he never even took the fucking time to ask something as simple as that and now she was mad as hell roaming either Nuka World or heading back to the commonwealth. He couldn’t let her turn out like Colter but have her just skip out wasn’t an option either, he had to find her – fast.

The elevator stopped and he rushed out half running hoping that she’d end up just standing outside having a smoke or bashing some Disciples head in for staring at her ass. His gut twisted when she was nowhere to be found, he had to figure out just where the hell she would have gone and that was fast.

‘’Hey Gage’’

Gage – startled to all hell – turned around to see Savoy lighting a cigarette and blowing out smoke towards the sky.

‘’Savoy’’

Gage greeted, it wasn’t a secret that the Boss wasn’t a fan of the Disciples (considering the fact that she could be quite brutal and had a…thing for knifes and blades) it was a bit of a surprise. What was even more surprising though was the fact that she got rather well along with Savoy – to put it simply Gage didn’t like it. He never knew what was going on inside that guys head and trying to read it from his expression was a waste of time even when he wasn’t wearing that ridiculous mask.

‘’You lookin’ for OB?’’

‘’Yeah, you seen her?’’

He took another drag of his cigarette before exhaling the smoke away from Gages face like he was considering if he should tell him or not.

‘’Yeah, I saw her. She was heading towards that old gas station, pissed as hell too. What did you do?’’

Gage wanted to snap at him for just assuming it was him but seeing as it actually was he just sighed.

‘’Brought a guest up to her quarters, got a bit. . . carried away’’

Savoy snorted and choked on some smoke.

‘’Yeah, if I caught you in my bed with your pants around your ankles I’d be mad too, would probably just kill you though so you might want to look out’’

‘’Yeah well she ain’t some blood thirsty savage’’

‘’If you say so. You better hurry up before she actually decides to go after you’’

‘’Ya, thanks for the help.’’

--

Gage stopped in front of the old Red Rocket station his hand hovering in front of the door, he had to give her props she knew what she was doing. The entire station had been secured with Turrets and a huge fence surrounding the entire station. She had built a foundation on the roof and another floor with a bedroom and more. Although the three gangs had helped build the place it was hers and they knew not to invade her privacy.

Gage didn’t know what to expect, last person who just barged in had ended up with a broken arm and pissed himself when she had pulled out her blade. And she hadn’t even been mad at the time just asserting her dominance. At least that’s what Mason had called it.

She wasn’t ever mean to Gage if anything she was nicer to him than anyone else, he saw her as a friend sure but was often reminded that no matter age or height she was the Over Boss and wasn’t afraid to show it. She was just never mean or hostile towards him.

‘’Fuck it’’

He mumbled and slid the door open, he waited a second to see if she would have been there to greet him with a knee to the gut but she was nowhere to be found. He closed the door behind him and headed for the upstairs ‘’bedroom’’ and sure enough she was sitting at her desk staring at a cigarette box.

‘’Hey Boss… You okay?’’

No answer.

‘’You worried me there, thought ya’ might have just skipped out on us – headed back to the commonwealth’’  

No answer.

‘’Shit… Boss I’m sorry, okay? I shouldn’t hav-‘’

‘’You could do better’’

Gage was taken a back and had to convince himself he had actually just heard her say that.

‘’Ain’t like I’m planning on settling down with her or anything we were just fucking’’

‘’In my bed.’’

‘’Now come on Boss, how many times I gotta tell ya’ I’m sorry?’’

He sighed and sat down on a couch in front of the bed. How she managed to get such a clean mattress he’d never know.

‘’What’s this all about Boss?’’

‘’You fucking in my bed’’

‘’I ain’t talking about that! How come you ain’t yelling at me, throwing shit hell I’ve seen you snap at people for just staring at ya’ for too long’’

‘’Your point?’’

‘’Where is the anger? Why is it never directed towards me?’’

She went quiet again reaching for the box of cigarettes and pulling one out, she placed it in between her lips and turned to him. Gage couldn’t help but chuckle she never brought her own lighter. He got up and walked up to her flipping out his lighter and placing it in front of her.

‘’Would you believe me if I said I respect you?’’

‘’No’’

He grinned and she just rolled her eyes taking a drag from the stick in between her lips.

‘’What If I told you I can relate to you’’

She held up the box and he pulled out his own cigarette lighting it and taking a drag himself.

‘’How so?’’

‘’A lot of ways. I Hate being the center of attention, always has. Hate how easily i get attached… I trust people and they end up stabbing me in the back’’

‘’Ya, people don’t often deserve trust’’

‘’No I’m serious the bastard actually stabbed me before he ran out with a bag full of my caps and my finest Bourbon’’

He snorted and shook his head, he missed that one-sided smile she had.

‘’I trust you.’’

He stopped smiling and looked up at her, her tone had changed and she was staring at him now all amusement wiped off her face.

‘’I- uh… Trust ya’ too Boss-‘’

‘’Don’t- don’t say it unless you mean it Gage. I just wanted you to know that I know what it feels like, and that I really do trust you’’

She took a last drag before she put it out and exhaled the smoke through her nose.

‘’No need for an answer now or ever i-‘’

‘’I trust ya’ Boss. I really do’’

She looked him in the eyes again and smiled, her eyes looking strangely beautiful in the dim light.

‘’Now can we be done with all this emotional shit?’’

Gage laughed nervously, truth be told he did find her beautiful, her eyes her hair her skin, everything. He remembers the time he had to help her clean a gash on her cheek and he got to slide his thumb over her cheek.

God damn if that wasn’t the smoothest skin he’d ever felt under his fingers, he was no stranger to women or the way their skin felt under his touch but never had he felt such warm and smooth skin. Weird as hell that he was even thinking about this shit.

‘’Gage how fucking long has it been for you’’

‘’I- What?’’

‘’You can’t sit quietly for a few minutes before you’re all flustered’’

‘’I ain’t thinking about fuckin’ Boss!’’

‘’Mhm… You should get back to that lovely old lady before she runs off’’

‘’I only paid for an hour anyways’’

‘’Jesus H Christ Gage you paid for her old ass?!’’

He groaned loudly with a look of defeat across his face, yup she was back to normal.

[elderbwrry]

Even if he doesn't say so

A little darkgingerpilot Witcher AU I discussed months ago with @cleversturmhond I have no concept of how time passes anymore

Summary: The Witcher meets a bard, the bard meets a mage, and they travel the continent. Kylo knows what he feels, but he can't seem to act. Hux acts without talking about things. And Poe... well, what does Poe feel?

Tags: Witcher AU, Inspired by The Witcher, Slow Burn, if you count 13k as slow burn i guess, within the story its slow burn, fantasy medieval setting, Self-Indulgent, Mage Hux, witcher kylo, Bard Poe, scenic, They're oblivious, sex references, Yearning, i guess, im slapping a mature on it for sex references and some minor violence but honestly ehhh idk, darkgingerpilot

Chapter 1/2/3/?, wordcount 5012

also on Ao3

Whenever someone asked Kylo, he always said he preferred to keep to himself and the company of Silence, his horse and his best companion for the very fact of her name; she didn't talk, she didn't disturb the meditative quiet of his lonely rides, and, most importantly, he wasn't unsure how to curry her favour. An apple would do it. His current companions, on the other hand...

For some gods-forsaken reason, Poe and Hux were quarrelling about a composer who had been dead for over a century. When the three of them had first started travelling together years ago, and in the short time since they'd reunited, such discussion had been endearing; both of them were opinionated about certain things, and their conversations often turned into little debates over whatever topic arose while they were travelling. This was one of those occasions, Kylo enjoying listening to their thoughts and voices filling up the worn country roads. A throwaway comment had become interesting; Kylo didn't actually know much about this particular composer, whereas Hux and Poe both did, and, though Kylo didn't often contribute to these discussions in any great detail since the other two were both so much better with words, he did like to learn something new occasionally. But now, several hours into their journey and still on the same subject, it was just getting fucking annoying.

“I literally studied her work. You can't just turn around and say she wasn't revolutionary,” Poe objected, trotting along between Silence and Hux's own horse on the wide bridleway, looking up at Hux indignantly.

Poe's lowered position made it seem slightly laughable when Hux looked down at him and countered, “Since I actually met the woman, I think you'll find I can,” before prompting his horse to walk on ahead of them.

Poe picked up his pace a little and continued the argument, making some musical point Kylo didn't understand either. He tried to tune them out a bit as he let Silence drop back a short distance behind the them.

Considering how much time the three of them spent around each other in recent years, Kylo supposed he should be glad disagreements as lengthy as these were relatively few. And, certainly, they were fewer even than when it had only been Kylo and Poe on the path together.

[break]

Kylo had met Poe many years ago – at least a decade, if he thought about it – when he'd been compelled by his work to go through the city he'd been born in. Not only was the place particularly unfriendly to Witchers, but also had relations of his – distant now, yet he wanted to avoid them nonetheless – in positions of authority. Kylo had used a fake name, a low hood to hide his eyes, his scar, and stuck to the dingiest taverns, but a curly-haired, high-born young man had recognised him anyway, sitting himself down confidently at Kylo's corner table, offering his name, and saying, “I know you. You're that famous Witcher.”

Kylo had eyed his unwelcome acquaintance – Poewas what he introduced himself as – guessing that he couldn't yet be twenty summers old. Of course, Kylo was no good with ages – his own longevity had corroded his sense for them until everyone seemed either old or young in confusing measures – but Poe's next request had practically confirmed his suspicion.

“Would you let me come with you?” Poe had asked the second the bar-wench had placed down Kylo's ale.

“Come with me where?” Kylo grunted. He wasn't in the mood to bodyguard some noble, out for the first time in a world without castle walls.

“Well, where are you going?” Poe's eyes had glinted as he offered Kylo a charming smile.

Kylo had appraised him again, taking in his youth, his rich clothes, his courage, and summarily said, “No.”

Poe's smile didn't drop, even though Kylo could see his only half-amused chuckle for the frustration it was. “Come on, I just wanna see a bit of the world. Get away from my guardian's expectations.”

“The Queen?” Kylo had asked, an imprudently displayed gold ring on the youth's finger catching the light.

Poe had shrugged a yes.

It only made Kylo refuse all the more. The Queen was one of the people Kylo was known to by unfortunate fact of his heritage, someone he never wanted to anger, in case of her having some cause to meet with him personally. Poe, while not her blood family, would surely be missed, as her ward, were he to make off with a Witcher, especially with the one so primarily known for the massacre at Crait.

Poe's gaze went steely at Kylo's final dismissal, and he'd left the tavern quickly after that. It couldn't have been two years later when Kylo encountered the young man again, fine doublet swapped for something a little more incognito in orange and brown tones, a lute slung over his back and all the more determination to see everything.

Kylo hadn't refused him a second time, and he wouldn't have been able to, since Poe no longer had any qualms about following him uninvited. Thus, he had a new travelling companion.

Just as he suspected, Poe was a liability in some aspects of the job where monsters were concerned, but Poe had also dragged him, limping, back to camp before, bandaged his wounds, fetched his potions. His life had undeniably turned for the better with the bard around; Poe was a talented musician, it turned out, and the extra income and incentive to stay at inns meant Kylo was now more acquainted with feather pillows than he'd ever hoped to be. The positive company had made Kylo better as well, at talking to people, at putting up with them, at giving life nuance. His path was lighter with Poe on it.

They became comfortable around each other. They began to argue, about the silly things people who know each other well and cared for each other deeply argue about, about which direction to head in, which inn to stop at, about the jacket Kylo had left to get trampled by the last monster he'd fought. Barely a day went by without some kind of silly quibble to that effect, but it never truly changed the form of their relationship.

Then, they'd met Hux.

[break]

Kylo had been around long enough that he'd thought he'd heard of most of the other powerful, non-mortal beings on the continent, so randomly running into an evidently strong mage like Hux, who he'd never heard of, was a bit surprising. Kylo had been employed to go and rid a keep up on the hill of whatever it was that was plaguing it. He was expecting to take a while to figure it out, but when he arrived, the malevolent spirits were revealed easily by the mage already locked in battle with them.

The fight the man was putting up was impressive, given the sheer number of foes. He was spewing fire everywhere, manipulating the elements to his will, his bright hair and swan-white robe whipped around by the wind he was creating, but eventually Kylo could see he was losing, and so joined him in the fight. It was fortuitous that they were both there, as Kylo certainly couldn't have defeated them all on his own either. When the last spirit was destroyed, however, Hux had spun round, announced that he had decidedly notrequired the help of some filthy Witcher, and flounced off. He'd gotten about ten paces when he collapsed from the sheer exertion of having used his magic in such a manner.

So Kylo had carried the mage back to camp and laid him down on his bedroll to recuperate.

Poe was travelling with Kylo at that time, and, though he was surprised to see Hux, he seemed very glad to see Kylo back from the fight, juiced up on potions but otherwise unharmed. His smile had made Kylo's heart do something he didn't really understand, the same thing it did when Poe met his gaze during a performance at whatever tavern they were staying at, the same when Kylo said something complimentary to him. Indeed, it was becoming more and more of a common feeling, and Kylo was finding that he rather liked it.

When Kylo suggested he should probably go find a rabbit or something for dinner, Poe seemed happy enough to watch over the mage until he returned, and Kylo had picked his way into the forest they were camping on the edge of with his head full of thoughts of Poe. His distraction had meant he took longer than usual to catch something, and when he got back, it was to find Poe backed against a tree, Hux threatening him using a dagger Kylo hadn't realised he'd had on him.

“Kylo!” Poe had shouted when he saw him – and again, the weird thing Kylo's heart did around Poe – equal parts relieved and pissed off.

Hux relaxed only slightly at knowing whose camp it was he had been brought to, and, once Kylo had convinced him to lower the weapon, he protested strongly that he didn't want anyone's help or charity, and that he was offended to have been carried around like some damsel. Poe told him he was very welcome to fuck off, but it soon became clear that Hux wasn't in any shape to be going off on his own, so he stayed with them that night.

Kylo was settling in to sleep on the opposite side of the fire to Hux when Poe dumped his bedroll down next to him, closer than usual – cue the weird heart thing again – and lay down. All Kylo had managed to ask was, “What are you doing?”

Huffing, Poe leaned up to peer over Kylo's arm at where Hux was lying, turned away from them on the far side of their little camp. “He tried to kill me today. I don't wanna wake up with my throat cut for some magey shit.”

Kylo considered pointing out that Poe wouldn't wake up at all if his throat had been slit, but he was more struck by the implication that Poe was trusting him to protect him. Usually, people were more likely to fear that Kylo would be the one killing them after whatever monster he'd been hired to dispatch, but Poe was different, and always had been, really. He insisted that Kylo had good in him, that he wasn't all the darkness that Witchers were supposed to be. He wasn't entirely right, of course, but it was nice to have someone hope in him.

So instead of making the bard move away, all Kylo had said was, “You'll get cold, so far from the fire,” and offered Poe an extra side of his own blanket.

One night of Hux staying with them turned into two, into three, into a week's travel to the neighbouring city. In fact, Kylo was almost sad to see the severe mage leave, as it meant he and Poe went back to their usual sleeping arrangements, instead of curling up together with Kylo as his shield.

[break]

Months later, to Kylo's surprise, Hux sought him out. He was after a gem of something something and he needed hired muscle that he could trust would actually get the job done. Hux had found them by the coast, and the first thing he said as he took Poe in was, “You're still travelling with him, are you?” Kylo wasn't sure whether the question was meant for him or Poe, but they'd both answered definitively.

The month and a half of travel it took to reach the mountain cave system in which the gem was kept saw Poe and Hux grow accustomed to each other, if not strictly friendly. Poe didn't resume his habit of sleeping next to Kylo, Hux didn't try to kill Poe again, and eventually they stopped speaking to each other in jibes and barbs.

Hux and Kylo also ended up bonding; they would sit together in taverns while Poe was performing and talk, about things that they remembered from when they were young, things Poe had learned only from his history professors. It was nice to have someone who related, who had experienced similar things to him, who understood what it was to be not-quite human and tied to a duty they didn't quite want. Hux had been raised in magic, it turned out, and, as they talked, Kylo realised it wasn't so different to being raised into killing as he had been. The small, commiserating smiles Hux offered struck Kylo deeply, and one day he realised that Hux, bathed in the yellow, glowing tavern light, was beautiful.

When they reached the cave systems that were their destination, Poe had to stay in the local town while Hux and Kylo went in search of the gem, since the place was too unknown and dangerous to risk him coming. And it did turn out to be dangerous; Hux and Kylo each saved each others' life a few times, had several close calls, and, once all the stress and danger of the adventure had turned into the satisfaction of success, they translated that pent-up tension into a vigorous fuck on the way out.

“I don't know why you keep him around,” Hux commented as they trudged back to the town to meet Poe, gem firmly in his grasp. “He can't help you with your work like I could.”

Kylo supposed that was true. “He helps me be better,” Kylo replied, which was also true.

Hux made a derisive sound. “Does he, now.”

Kylo shook his head at Hux's tone. “Why don't you like him? You have plenty in common.”

“It's not that I don't like him,” Hux said, tossing his head to get a strand of hair which had slipped in front of his eyes out of the way. Considering Kylo was grimy and dishevelled from the fighting, Hux's deep crimson tunic still looked remarkably put together, and it gave him a haughty air as he said, “I know his type. I've served them in courts all over the continent for centuries. They think they're entitled to everything without working for it and without thanking the people who actually make it possible. He's just another ungrateful, mortal noble.”

Kylo thought about what he said for a good minute. “You're wrong,” he said.

[break]

Back at the inn, Poe had the entire town in the palm of his hand thanks to his songs. He looked charming as ever, flashing smiles to all the ladies who were fawning over him, but Kylo was happy to see that, when Poe spotted them enter, his smile softened and a new light entered his eyes. This time, the flip in Kylo's heart felt more natural than ever.

When Kylo emerged from the bathhouse, Poe was already waiting in his room for a full account of the adventure so he could turn it into his latest ballad. Kylo related what happened as he usually did, keeping to the bare facts and trusting Poe to make them into pretty wordplay later, until he got to the end, at which point he decided that Poe didn't strictly need to know that Hux had pushed him up against the wall of the cave and kissed him with a ferocity he wasn't likely to forget any time soon.

But Poe noticed the brief hesitation and looked up from his little book where he'd been scribbling notes. “What?” he asked.

Kylo shrugged. “Nothing. We left to come back here,” he said, pulling the shirt he was wearing off and reaching for a different one.

“Did something bite you?”

Kylo could hear the frown in Poe's voice, and he turned back to see Poe's eyes locked on a slightly bruised, reddish ring low on his neck. A vague recollection surfaced in Kylo's mind of Hux tugging down his collar, once his outer layer of armour was off, and digging his teeth hard into the flesh over that spot. He hummed, reaching up to rub at it and thus hide it from Poe's sight. “Must have.”

Poe stood up and approached, batting Kylo's hand out of the way, which he couldn't find the motivation to resist. When Poe ran his thumb over the bruise, he was so warm Kylo pushed into the touch. If Poe noticed, he didn't comment, his brow was deeply furrowed. “What kind of monster even has teeth like that?”

A knock came on the door. “Kylo,” Hux called from outside, “we need to talk about payment.”

“I'm...” Kylo hesitated, feeling strangely and suddenly like he'd betrayed Poe. “I'm coming.”

Kylo wasn't sure what about him looked guilty, but Poe seemed to realise at that moment where the mark came from. “Oh,” he said, stepping away and back to his book.

Not long after that, Poe announced his intention to head back to his home kingdom. Kylo's mouth went dry. It was Hux who had to ask the platitudes – did he have some business to attend to? How long did he think he would stay? - which Poe replied to blandly, something about responsibility to his mentors. Kylo wanted to ask him to stop, to stay, but all he managed to get out was, “I'll miss you.”

[break]

Time passed.

Poe left for home, taking his light and song with him.

Kylo spent one winter with Hux, back in the keep where they'd first met, which Hux had appropriated for himself, but it was all wrong; there was a grounding influence missing, without which the two of them spent more time treating each other angrily than well. The sex was amazing, but eventually, it felt hollow. The day it became clear that the harshest weather had blown over, Kylo was back on Silence, looking for the next contract out on a monster, something he could hack into pieces without thinking.

The seasons changed, fled and returned until it had been another year. Kylo was firmly back in the blank swing of contract, monster, payment, move along, but the campfire felt lonely after dark, when he had nothing to occupy his mind. He started talking to Silence; she never replied.

Sometimes, Kylo found himself wondering how long it would be until he ran into Hux again, and if he would even want to see him. Maybe he could make the way they left things up to him. They'd had something, after all, and, though it hadn't been perfect, he missed that feeling of love and understanding and protection which Hux provided. Kylo didn't hold out much hope of seeing Poe; he never went near his home city, and why would Poe venture out again? He'd seen his share of the world. He was back in his real life, now.

But eventually, those nights of wondering wore Kylo down, and, quite without intending to, he found himself directing Silence down the path to the kingdoms neighbouring Poe's.

There, Kylo found himself invited to the royal tourney of Queen Phasma, as a guest of honour. She was a renowned warrior, and Kylo reasoned that it would be rude to decline the request of such an esteemed ruler. He reasoned that perhaps she would even have some work for him. He reasoned a lot of things, in his attempt to deny to himself that the real reason was hope that a tourney would be more than enough cause for a neighbouring noble to be in the area, or even just a bard...

The festivities were festivities. It was strange, to watch others fight instead of having to do it himself, and for performance rather than necessity. Though sometimes the rush of people grated on him, Phasma was a gracious host and Kylo enjoyed the good food well enough, always keeping an eye out for some shock of red hair, or those cheerful, dark curls he so hoped for.

His vigilance yielded one of those prizes.

A tall, beautiful, severe looking man entered the great hall one evening for the feast, walking directly up to the main table at which Phasma and Kylo were seated, and didn't even falter when he recognised Kylo's distinctive scar, yellow eyes, dark garb.

“Hux!” Phasma exclaimed standing and marching around the table to pull the man into a hug, which he returned with surprising readiness, “My dear friend, it has been too long!”

Hux gave a half-bow. “I'm sorry I'm late, I was caught up with business.”

“Ah, yes, business,” Phasma said knowingly, “and where is Lord Dameron?”

Hux's eyes flitted over to Kylo's for the briefest of seconds. “Altogether too caught up with his teaching to bother with a tournament, I'm afraid.”

“Well you must tell him I want him at the next one.” With that, she made to retake her seat again, gesturing at Kylo. “Kylo, this is Hux, currently an advisor to court in the neighbouring kingdom and the most talented mage in all the continent. Hux, Kylo, the Witcher.”

“Yes, we've met,” Hux understated, settling his gaze on Kylo fully, now, and extending his hand to Kylo over the table. Not sure what he was expected to do, Kylo gave Hux his hand, and Hux took it, raising it to his lips and kissing Kylo's knuckles.

Kylo wasn't entirely certain if he could blush any more, since the mutations which had turned him into a Witcher, but if he could, he was sure he was, what with so many people around to witness a display of affection which Kylo was unused to at the best of times. Along with that, relief, because it made him feel suddenly like all was forgiven without him having to wrangle the words around an apology.

“Hux, stop that and sit down!” Phasma reprimanded, “The players will begin soon.”

It was only as Hux sat down that Kylo realised the empty chair on his right had likely always been for Hux. No sooner had he settled than the players flooded the floor, dancing into their performance of an old, famous play, something about two supernatural kings vying for the affection of a mortal with all sorts of fanciful gifts.

“This version is better than the original,” Hux remarked a short while in, and Kylo hummed out an assent, though he had never seen it when it first was performed. He was probably too busy wading through drowner guts, or something similarly uncouth.

“So, you're in Poe's court, now?” Kylo asked instead. “Is he king?”

“No,” Hux remarked, picking up his goblet of wine and keeping his gaze on the players. “Nor does he want to be. The Queen has plenty of other worthy successors, and Poe would much rather go back to spending his days as a bard.” He tutted. “Even if he doesn't say so.”

“Why are you there?”

He sighed. “I wanted to see what you meant about him not being like the others, so I offered my services to the Queen.” Kylo hummed again, and this time, Hux turned to look at him. “You were quite right. He's different. I find myself rather taken with him.”

Kylo reached for his own wine now, his mouth suddenly dry. “Oh. Have you..?”

“No. Kylo...” Hux placed his cup down and leaned to the side so his shoulder was brushing Kylo's, even as Kylo was resolutely not looking at him. “He misses you. And I know you miss him.”

As if by design, the lutist started to play, and both their eyes went to the young woman performing in the corner. Kylo found himself thinking, perhaps uncharitably, that she wasn't as talented as Poe, her song wasn't as sweet.

Hux didn't fail to notice this. “I think we should travel together again,” he said.

“We?”

“You and I and Poe,” Hux said, as though it were obvious. “Like we did those few months travelling in from the coast. I've found myself thinking about them a lot.”

Kylo shrugged. “It was only a few months. Things have changed since then.”

“Which is why we should give it another try.” Kylo jolted in slight surprise when he felt Hux's cool hand lay over his own on the arm of the chair. He turned to find Hux looking directly into his eyes. “Stay here for a week after the tourney is over, and I'll have convinced him to come. Kylo.” A tacit command from Hux, as usual, instead of a request.

Kylo nodded.

[break]

So Kylo waited by the city gates, where Hux had sent a messenger bird that he should meet them. He was nervous, when he first spotted the black dot on the distant path that he was sure was them, shuffling from one foot to the other and gripping Silence's reins tight, like that would do anything. He was wondering how he should greet Poe; hello, certainly, and he didn't think he'd be able to stop himself from smiling, but he found that he also wanted to give him a hug, press their lips together, feel that he was really thereagain, after the nearly two years they'd spent apart.

It turned out he needn't have worried, since Poe sprang forward and clasped him into a hug without prompting, talking immediately about where they would be going and how good it would be to be back on the road.

Hux had merely given him a look that said I told you so, and followed after the excitable bard.

That had been nearly two weeks ago.

It turned out that Hux was entirely right; things were different than before, and they were better. The things that had changed were these:

Hux had brought a horse with him, this time, and several other magical items, such as a tent which was far larger inside than it appeared. Poe hadn't bothered with a horse, since he hadn't needed one before, and had thus left the money with which to pay for its upkeep back at home, planning instead to sing for his money like he used to. Kylo rather liked this; it reminded him of old times, when he steadfastly refused to let Poe ride Silence, in case it tired her out too much. The tent, on the other hand, felt annoyingly like Hux was living in style while the two of them were stuck outside, since Hux had never invited them in and Kylo, for one, wasn't about to invite himself.

It seemed Hux and Poe had also developed a much closer friendship, in the time Hux had spent at court. It made Kylo feel a little like he had missed out, like he had time to catch up on, like there was something impenetrable he couldn't access. Kylo supposed it must be similar for Hux, since he and Poe had known each other for so long before he met them, and again for Poe, given that winter when it was only him and Hux, but times like these – Poe and Hux discussing something so academic that Kylo knew so little about – could be daunting as much as interesting.

Mostly, Kylo felt like he still had to make something up to Poe, and he wasn't sure how to do it. He should probably just have a conversation with him about it, but the words never came, and bringing it up when nobody was thinking about it would, he was sure, just sour the mood. And if he just left it, the tension would have to break eventually.

[break]

Ahead of him on the road, Hux and Poe's little argument seemed to have reached a peak point. Kylo had been too lost in his thoughts to pay attention to what they were saying, but now Poe had stopped walking, raising open arms in that way of his that was almost defeated, but actually said he still thought he was right. It was very cute, like he was a turtle with a lute for a shell, and Kylo couldn't help but think his annoyed expression was charming as well.

When Silence reached the spot where Poe was standing, watching Hux ride on with his usual haughty confidence, Kylo hummed. “Did he win?”

Poe huffed, moving again to keep up with Silence's ambling pace. “No, but he's acting like he did. He always thinks he's right.”

Kylo thought about it for a beat; Hux did indeed always think that he was right. It was one of the things that had caused friction in their attempt at a relationship that one winter. It wasn't that all three of them couldn't be stubborn, more that Kylo and Poe had much more ability to hold out against each other's pestering than either of them seemed to have against Hux. One narrowing twitch of those steely-grey eyes, and anyone with even half a sense of self-preservation would surrender. So Kylo could sympathise with Poe's little pout.

They came to the edge of the forest, the village where they planned to stop a short way before them across a few fields. Kylo drew Silence to a halt and put out a hand to Poe, who looked at it first with surprise and then joy. He quickly allowed Kylo to help him up, settling just behind the Witcher, his chest pressed to his back, their thighs brushing against each other with every movement. Kylo could feel it all, and he tried not to let his stomach flip too much when Poe's arms snaked around his sides, hands locking at his front. He cursed inwardly that today he'd chosen to forgo some layers in favour of his cooler shirt.

But then Poe was saying to him over his shoulder – though it felt more like murmuring in his ear - “Come on, I wanna see Hux's face.”

Kylo prodded Silence to walk on, closing the distance on Hux. As they passed, Kylo felt Poe remove one hand to wave at the mage. Looking around, it was in almost slow motion that Hux's expression went from one of mild astonishment to annoyance to jealousy.

“See you there, Hugs!” Poe said, and Kylo smiled to himself.

[samthemarvelfan]

One Last Time (Part 2 of 2)

Summary: ModernAU! Mini Series! With her best friend’s wedding around the corner, Ella Monroe is bound to run into people from her past. While she may have left her old life behind, it seems as though her heart hasn’t.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x OFC, feat: Wanda Maximoff, Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanoff, Sam Wilson

Warnings: Swearing, heavy angst, infidelity, mentions of drinking, implied smut.

A/N: Part Two is here! (It’s long and im sorry lol) This idea was so much fun to write! Thank you as always for all the love on Part One, I’m so honored you’re reading my work! Buckle up, y��all. You’re in for quite the ride. <3 (taglist is still open, just send an ask!)

Taglist: @iheartsebastianstan @jjlizz @stuckysbabe @sk493494 @lefoutoir @nickangel13 @marvelismysafezone @lilulo-12 @warmvanillafeels @star-spangled-beard-burn @ravenesque @pinknerdpanda @wintersoldierissucharide @snapcapquartet @ellen-reincarnated1967 @unlistedpond @my-drowning-in-time @supernaturalwintersoldier @kimvmarvel @roseboho @disaffectedbarnes​ (strikethrough means the tag didn’t work! I’m sorry!)

“I was wondering how long you were gonna avoid me.”

Your breathe caught in your throat. Suddenly, it felt like ice water was rushing down your spine.

You couldn’t think—couldn’t move. You had to will your brain to function again.

“What exactly makes you think you’re worth me avoiding?” You hissed.

Bucky’s voice was ingrained into your memory—you’d know it anywhere. The biggest crowds or the largest rooms, you could pick out his tone.

He let out a small chuckle. “It’s good to see you, Els.”

He was sat in a shadowed part of the patio, it’s no wonder you didn’t see him when you came out.

You scoffed, “Is it? Wish I could say the same there, buddy.”

The shock of seeing him had faded; how were you this composed? You’d always thought you’d be putty in his hands if you ever saw him again.

Turns out your backbone was made of fucking steel.

Bucky stood, gripping onto what you assumed was bourbon—his go-to drink.

On the rocks, three fingers high. You thought, hating yourself for remembering.

When he stepped into the light, it was clear why your backbone had been strong; you hadn’t seen his face yet.

You’d be a liar if you said he looked bad. He was still handsome as ever. He had a bit of a beard now, the stubble of one at least, and his hair was shorter thank you’d ever seen it.

“Wanda said you asked if I was here.” You crossed your arms, shielding yourself from him.

He nodded, taking a sip of his drink. “I did.”

You waited for him to continue, but he didn’t. The only sound between the two of you was the ice clinking against his glass.

“You gonna tell me why?” You sneered.

Bucky smiled and shook his head. “Just curious, Els. Just curious.”

Why is he smiling? What the fuck does he have to smile about?

“Right, I’m sure curiosity is what made you hide out here. Alone.”

He finished his drink with one final toss, “Actually, I was with Steve, but he said he was grabbing drinks for you guys, so...figured I didn’t wanna intrude.”

Your arms fell to your sides, “Intrude?” You asked.

Bucky nodded, “Yeah. On your date. Personally, I don’t see it, but if he’s what you’re into now-a-days, then...” he drifted off.

Your blood began to boil. “What I’m into?” You echoed. “I’m not here with Steve, James. Even if I was, I don’t think that’s any of your fucking business.”

His eyes widened, confidence drained from his face. “No, no, Els I didn’t mean—“

“And another thing, what makes you think you have even the smallest right to make that comment? Or any comment! It’s been 5 years, James!” You’d shouted, grateful for the music bumping inside.

Bucky scrubbed a hand down his beard, “I know, I know...shit. This isn’t how I wanted this to go.”

“This?” You asked, “There is no this. Hasn’t been for a long time, you made sure of that.”

When he didn’t reply, you scoffed, rolling your eyes.

“Ya know what? You’re not worth the aggravation. I’ve been there with you and there’s nothing good in it for me.” You start heading towards the doors to go back inside.

“Enjoy the wedding, James.” You say without looking at him.

Your hand touches the door, when he calls out to you. “Ella?”

Your gaze is returned to him once more.

“Y-you look beautiful, Doll.” He says.

You, on the other hand, don’t say anything.

Once your back inside, you find Wanda and Sam and Steve and finish the rest of your night in the company of your friends.

All while wondering if that crack you heard in Bucky’s voice was real or not.

“Vomit. I’m going to vomit.” Wanda said, fanning herself.

You rushed back to her with a glass of cold water. “Oh no you’re not, not in this dress and that makeup. I won’t allow it.”

She sipped the cold drink, “I’m starting to regret having no one up there with me.”

You adjusted her veil, primping the last bit you could. “No shit.” You joked.

She let out a long breathe, and then inhaled deeply. “I’m getting married. God, this is crazy.”

You smiled softly, “It’s not crazy. No one, and I mean no one deserves this more than you.”

Wanda’s eyes landed gently on yours, “You do.”

You sat with that for a moment. Your best friend is standing here, minutes before she walks down the isle, trying to get you to understand that you are worthy of love, and that you deserve your happy ending.

“I love you, Wan.” You choked out. “But if you make me cry I’m gonna kick you ass.”

You both laughed out your nerves. “Whew...okay, distract me. I can’t sit here for 10 more minutes in silence.”

You waited a moment, thinking on what to say, before you blurred out what was weighing most on your mind.

“I saw Bucky last night.” You whispered.

Wanda eyes expanded, “What? You didn’t tell me!”

You roll your eyes at her dramatics, “There’s nothing to tell, Wan.”

“Well what did he say?!” She prodded.

You recounted the small interaction to her. Her face making the funniest expressions with each added detail.

“Then he said ‘this isn’t how I wanted this to go’...whatever that means.” You said, handing her her bouquet.

“Anything else happen?” God damn this girl could read you like a book.

You cleared your throat. “I was uh, I was walking back inside and he stopped me and said ‘you look beautiful, doll’...”

Her jaw dropped, “He so wants you back.”

You laughed. Genuinely laughed. “Wanda, you’re psychotic.”

She slapped your shoulder, “Am not! He obviously regrets what he did and how things ended. Maybe he wanted to use this weekend to apologize?”

You shook your head subtly, slipping your heels back on. “James Barnes does not apologize.” You stated flatly.

5 Years Earlier, before the breakup.

“Buck, please stop.” You whispered to him.

He was being brash, loud, and boisterous at the very first work event you’d been invited too.

Oh yeah, and he was piss drunk off of the open bar.

“Stop what? I’m just telling stories, Doll.” He said, louder than he realized.

You colleagues all gave you looks of pity. Your boss Pepper was watching you with a curious eye, not judging, just taking in your interaction.

That was somehow worse.

“Bucky, please...everyone is looking at you. This is my job. You’re—“

“I’m what, Els?” He slurs loudly.

Your feel the blood rush to your face. “James...” you warn.

“What is it? Am I embarrassing you? I’m not fancy enough to hang out with your work pals, is that it?” His words are laced with venom. How long had he been feeling like this?

Your face softened looking at your boyfriend. About to speak, you notice Pepper making her way through the crowd.

You panic, “Alright, time to go.” Quickly, you grab Bucky’s hand and yank him toward the door.

You don’t stop walking until you’re a safe distance away from the building where the conference was being held.

“What is the matter with you?!” You shout unable to keep composure any longer.

Bucky’s face is stoic, and unfazed by your outburst.

“I was trying to have fun, but those uptight douchebags wouldn’t know fun if it—“

“I work with those people, James! My boss was watching you make an ass of yourself the whole time!” You can’t help the anger settling in your bones.

He scoffed, “So you are embarrassed of me. Noted.” He said walking past you.

But he paused, turning on his heel to take a few steps back to you. “Ya know what, Els? I didn’t have a fancy education and I don’t have a big, cushy job. I’m just an average fucking guy. I can’t fit in with these people, I don’t belong with those people.”

You cross your arms. Have you really become this couple? Fighting on the streets of Manhattan in the freezing cold?

“Have I ever asked you to be someone else? I invited you because my Boss told everyone to bring their spouses.” You take a step toward him.

Bucky sighed, running his hands down his face. “We’re just...two different people, Ella.”

All at once it feels like the winds been knocked out of you.

“Yeah. Yeah we are. But unlike you, I don’t see you the way you do. I see a hardworking man. A guy who has taken care of everyone else his whole life, and who deserves to have someone finally take care of him. I see a man who takes pride in his work and enjoys what he does. I see a guy who pays his bills on time, and who always manages to surprise me with even the smallest of gestures. I see the man I love, James.”

You were crying. How long had he felt so inadequate? It broke your heart to think he didn’t feel as important as he was to you.

“I can’t help my job. I can’t help my education. But don’t you dare throw those things in my face. I’ve worked hard to get to where I am, and I’m damn proud of myself for it.

He watched you for a moment, his jaw clenched tightly. Bucky shoved his hands in his pocket before hanging his head low. “I’m...I don’t know what to say.”

Damn his pride. You thought to yourself.

You reached out to him, cupping his cheek in your hand. “I know. It’s okay.”

He kissed your palm, before pulling you into him. “I’m not good enough. I know I��m not. Not for you.”

Bucky kissed your forehead, and for some reason, you weren’t sure why, it felt like he was saying goodbye.

The wedding was beautiful. Not a dry eye in the house—certainly not from you.

“Nat was a blubbering mess.” Sam jested.

“Excuse me for being over-emotional!” She said gesturing pointedly at her stomach.

You laughed, “I cried too, Nat, don’t worry.”

“Hey, got your table cards, guys.” Steve said, walking over to the three of you.

“Thank you,” you said with a smile, “She seat us together?”

He nodded, “Sure did, thank goodness.” Steve smiled, handing you your card.

“I need to go sit and eat and eat some more—in that order.” Nat said.

You walked to the beautifully set circular table, walking around to find what seat your place card was on. That’s when you noticed the fifth seat at the table.

“Who else is seared with us?” Sam asks.

Picking up the seat card between your seat and Steve’s, you felt you stomach do a back flip.

“Is that my seat?” A voice asked, approaching you from behind.

Not a voice. His voice.

You spin to see him. Bucky. Standing there with a sheepish grin on his face.

Practically throwing the place card down, you swiftly take your seat. “Looks like it.”

Wanda, I’m going to kill you. You think to yourself.

Bucky said his hello’s to everyone, taking his seat. “I didn’t know about this, I swear.” He whispers to you.

“It doesn’t matter. Nothing matters. Just...don’t talk to me.” You whisper harshly.

From the corner of your eye, you can see the defeat on his face as he sinks back into his chair. Since when does he have feelings?

You perk up at the clinking of a fork against a crystal glass. “Excuse me ladies and gentlemen? We’re going to have a few words from the Bride and Groom before dinner is served.” Wanda’s brother announced.

Vis went first. He spoke about how he and Wanda had met, and how quickly he fell in love with her. He spoke about what he loved about her in more detail than I’d ever heard some describing anything.

He loved her. He was in love with her.

It warmed your heart to see how safe and happy your friends heart was. A soft smile landed on your lips as you watching Wanda stand and join Vis to speak.

“You ever want something like this?” Bucky whispered to you as their speeches continued.

You glance at him quickly, shocked at the ease in which he spoke to you. His face was gentle, his eyes seeming desperate for an answer.

“What, a wedding? Sure I did.” You said earnestly.

He paused for a moment, clearly nervous to speak again. “D-Did you ever want it with me?”

You hesitated. Why is he asking you this here, now? Was Wanda right? Was this all a big plan to apologize?

You sighed, turning away from him slightly. “You were my everything at one point, Buck. Future included.”

You wondered if that sentence had hurt him the way it hurt you.

Wanda continued her speech. What she was saying you weren’t sure, your mind was exactly where you didn’t want it.

With Bucky.

Despite your back being to him, you felt his stare. The heat coming off of his body, ironically enough, made you shiver.

“Ella...” his voice strained from behind you.

You did a half turn to see his face. His eyes were watery with tears, and his jaw was locked. “Can I—can we talk? Please.” He begged.

You don’t know how it happened. Maybe it was the sincerity in his tone, or the loss of hope in his eyes, but before you know it, you’re following him out to the hallway, into an empty stair well.

“I just wanna talk, I promise.” He confesses.

You roll your eyes, “You said that already, James.”

Bucky groans. “For Christ’s sake, will you stop calling me that?”

A scoff passed your lips, “It’s your name. If you’d like, I’m sure I can come up with some other things to call you.” You quipped.

He stood still finally, “It makes it sound like we’re fucking strangers, Ella .”

“That’s because we are!” You shout. “It’s been five years, probably more since I’ve seen you, let alone spoken to you. You don’t know me anymore, and I’m fairly certain I never actually knew you.”

The feeling of your heart beating out of your chest took over. You were allowing yourself to feel for the first time in all these years. All the hurt and the pain and the rage he’d caused your heart was being laid bare.

“Yes you did. You were the only one who ever saw the real me.” He said somberly.

You scoffed, “Good to know. The real you is a cheater and a liar. Noted.”

He groaned furiously, “No! For fucks sake that’s not what I meant.”

You watched the struggle happening within him. Bucky was never a “good talker” as he used to say, that’s why he always wrote letters. It was obvious he was trying to piece together some kind of coherent thought.

“Just say what you wanted to say, James.” You urge him, crossing your arms.

He shook his head. “I’m not...fuck, I’m still not good at this. You’d think I would have learned how to fucking apologize by now.”

Your breathing hitched, “What did you say?”

He sighed, “I’m taking a really long time to...just fucking say...I’m sorry. God, I’m so fucking sorry for what I did to you.”

Suddenly ice water was coursing through your veins. He said sorry. James Barnes said he was sorry.

You couldn’t speak, and even if you could, what would you say?

His voice was shaking as he spoke, “I was so fucking selfish and blinded by my own insecurities, that I let it ruin the best thing in my life. You were...God, you were everything I could have ever wanted.” He smiled, presumably getting lost in his memories of the two of you.

He stepped closer to you, and to your surprise, you didn’t back away. “But just cause I wanted you doesn’t mean I deserved you, and I guess deep down I knew that. Hell, I wanted to break up after that disaster at your office party. Remember that? That’s when I knew if we stayed together, I’d just drag you down with me.”

His words broke—re-broke your heart. The tears stinging your eye were begging to be shed. But Bucky was speaking without hesitation now, so you let him.

“I tried, Doll. I tried so many fucking times to be a man and end it. But then you’d come home after a long day and look so fucking happy to see me,” his voice cracked with emotion, “and I couldn’t do it. You were so perfect, and so good to me. I was a selfish prick who wanted to soak you in a little more before I knew I’d have to push you away.”

“You had no right to make that decision!” You sobbed.

Bucky reached out and wiped your tears off your cheeks. Why don’t you push him away?

“Honey, I was a broken, immature boy pretending to be the man you deserved...” a tear fell down his cheek as well.

You finally pushed him back, wiping your own eyes. “So you decide to fuck another girl in our bed? That was your great plan to push me away? How about be honest, Bucky!”

He stood there, taking his verbal beating. “You could’ve told me how you were feeling. I would have told you how ridiculous that was--how much I fucking loved you! How I would have helped you in any way you needed me too. But you decided to fucking kill me instead. You broke me, Bucky. The life we had wasn’t perfect, but it was ours.”

He scrubbed his face with his hands, sniffling when he shoved them back in his pockets. “I know. I know what I did. I see your face every God damn day of my life. That look on your face when you saw that girl in our house.”

You bit your lip, the painful memories of that day making your stomach churn.

“I never slept with her, though.” Bucky says plainly.

You scoff, “and here I thought for one we were finally being totally honest with each other.”

He put a hand over his heart. “On my life, Doll. I didn’t. Had I planned too? Yeah. But you came home that afternoon and thankfully I never did.”

“James...” you scold, “I saw her! She was pretty much naked in our bedroom!”

He nods, “She had gone to the bathroom to look for the condoms I hid in there. She couldn’t find them though, that’s when she walked out and you walked in.”

As you pieced together his story, your eyes flitted from side to side. “So..so you never cheated, you just intended too. But you never actually slept with someone else.” These were questions from you. They were statements. You were trying to make sense of all of this.

“Not that it makes any of what happened better, but I was gonna tell her to leave as soon as she came outta the bathroom. Honestly? I couldn’t get it up at all.” He jokes to ease the moment.

“Buck...” you chided

“I’m serious! I felt so fucking guilty, Els. I couldn’t do it. Besides she...” he drifted off.

“She what, Buck?”

His cerulean eyes met you for the first time. “She wasn’t you, Baby.”

Baby.

He’d called you that so many times. This time it felt different, it felt familiar. It felt right.

You shook your head, “Stop it, James.” Your lips quivered as you spoke.

He refused, “No. I lost you once, because of my own arrogance and stupidity, I’m not gonna do it again. Do you know how many times I wanted to write you? I have so many letters written, all of them unsent because I knew you’d never wanna see me again.”

He’d written you? He’d thought about you? All these years and you’d thought he’d forgotten you.

“I’ve loved you...what seems like my whole life, Els.”

You sniffled, “So what do you expect? Us to fall into each other’s arms and pretend like the last five years didn’t happen?”

He shook is head. “Of course not. I don’t even know what I was hoping for, really. I just needed you to know the truth, and for you to know how deeply and wholly sorry I am.”

In an instant, the world had changed. You were no longer holding onto the bitterness that had seeded itself into your heart. You’d seen Bucky in a new light, granted not a flattering one, but a true one.

One that showed he wasn’t the heartless monster you’d been believing he was for years.

“I forgive you.” You choked out.

A muffled sob snuck past his lips. “C-Can I hug you?” He asked timidly.

You hesitated, but eventually nod. In an instant, Bucky’s arms are enveloping you. His warm chest comforting your shaking body.

He held you for what felt like hours, inhaling your scent, and caressing you’re back.

But you didn’t mind.

It felt good to be held again, and to be held by Bucky felt familiar.

He pulled away slightly, to look at your face. His eyes roamed over every detail, like he was afraid he’d forget something if he’d never see you again.

“Buck.” You practically whisper.

He smiled, “I can’t kiss you...right?”

You bit your lip. “No...no. Definitely not. Right?” You reply weakly.

He stepped back, “Yeah, that’s...that’d be too much.”

You smoothed you’re dress down, and tucked some hair behind your ear. ���Exactly. Yeah.”

“We should get back out there anyway. I have a feeling we’re missing that very expensive dinner.” He laughed.

You smiled softly, “Don’t wanna miss that.” You jest.

Bucky let you walk in front of him, leading the way.

You grasp the door handle, but before you can swing it open, Bucky grabs your hand and twirls your body into his.

Without missing a beat, his lips are on yours before you even have time to think. Like second nature, you melt under his touch.

Mouths moving with a remembrance and familiarity that you hadn’t felt in forever. Hands searching for changes in each other’s bodies—there were none.

“Bucky. Buck...stop. Stop.” You moaned.

He did as he was asked, “What—what’s wrong?” He breathed into you.

“We can’t do this...not here.”

He pulled back, hesitantly, but he does. “You’re right. Shit, I’m sorry.”

You laugh, “Don’t be. We just...we can’t just jump back into things like that. We gotta get to know each other again. Okay?”

He smiled whole heartedly. “Really?”

You nod. “Just...don’t make me regret this, Bucky. Please.”

Bucky grabbed your hand, bringing it to his mouth. He placed a chaste kiss on your palm, before closing it and returning it to your heart. “I promise you, Ella. I promise I’ll make this right.”

And you believe him.

Is it against your better judgement? Maybe. But you know the old saying, ‘Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...”

As you walked back to the reception with him, you saw Bucky with new eyes. You no longer looked at him with disdain and malice, but instead, you saw hope.

Hope for not only your future and his, but hope for one you can build together.

In the end that’s all you wanted, something that everyone in your life seemed to have and believe you deserved.

A happy ending.

Part One

[overobsessivewhumper]

Mutt’s hospital visit

Ahhhh... Finally i got to writing! This took too long! Not one of my best works, but hey... This is extra bad, because my knowledge of hospitals and medicine are very limited

Next

Content warning: hospital, broken ribs, mention of other injuries, modern slavery, past abuse

Tag list: @castielamigos-whump-side-blog @burtlederp @im-not-rare-im-rarr @comfortforthepain @18-toe-beans @haro-whumps @deluxewhump @kungpao-giffy @draganies @spiffythespook @whump-chains @projectstripe

Gavin should have noticed sooner. It was so obvious. Any other person would have noticed. Everything was pointing to it. The coughing, Caleb’s shallow and careful breathing, the way he occasionally clutched his side in pain when he thought Gavin wasn’t paying attention to him. But Gavin didn’t notice, did he? Not until he finally came around to asking Caleb to show him what’s wrong and saw the very unnatural shift of rib bones along his right side.

And Gavin’s ignorance is precisely the reason he’s currently driving as fast as he dares, heart rate going a whole lot faster then it probably should in a healthy human, whilst Caleb sits on the passenger seat, looking equal parts absolutely terrified and confused. Gavin should have noticed sooner. Caleb could have died of internal bleeding! Hell, he could be dying right now!

“Just… Just hang in there Caleb. It’s fine. You’re… You’re going to be fine! This is all fine! You are not dying!” Gavin wondered who he was actually trying to reassure; Caleb, or himself. Gavin glances over at Caleb. Caleb does not look reassured.

“D… Dying?! I’m… I’m dying?” Gavin curses himself for being this shit at handling stress situations.

“No. No. It’s fine Caleb. I… You’re going to be fine! It’s just… just broken ribs. It’s fine.” Turning his attention back to the road, Gavin tries to get his breathing in check, attempting a few slow and deep breaths in a row. Gavin can feel Caleb’s eyes on him, getting the feeling that the man next to him is burning to ask him something, but doesn’t dare to say anything.

“You want to say something, right? Go on. You always have my permission to speak.” Gavin’s words come out a bit choked between his shitty attempts at calm breathing. He can see Caleb fidgeting with his hands in the corner of his eye.

“I… Mas… I… I mean Gavin I…” He closes his eyes, swallowing hard. He clenches his fists before speaking louder, faster and clearer than Gavin heard him ever before. “If you’re bringing me to a… a Pet pound because of a… a few br… broken ribs, I… I beg you not to! I can st… still work! I can be… be useful a… and good, eve… even if I am damaged goods!” For a moment, Gavin can’t say anything. But he jumps back into action when he can see Caleb curling in on himself again, looking horrified at how he just spoke back to his Master. Gavin can sense him going into apologising and begging for forgiveness mode.

“No! I’m not taking you to a Pet pound!” Gavin stops. He’s being too loud. He can’t get loud with Caleb. He tries again, keeping his voice at a moderate level. “I would never Caleb. “ Caleb is staring at his wrists. “Caleb… Please look at me.” Caleb obeys, as he always does. “I can’t look at you right now. Don’t want to get us caught up in a car accident as well… But please. Trust me when I say, I’m not going to give you away. Not now, not ever.” Gavin feels Caleb itching to ask something again.

“It’s okay if you want to ask something Caleb. I won’t see it as rude.” Caleb resumes his fidgeting again.

“I… Ga… Gavin, whe… where are we go… going then?” Good question. Where are they going to? Caleb needs medical care. And fast. Gavin is not risking a man’s death over said man’s assurance that he can work on with broken ribs. Pet medical facilities have the biggest array of different treatments, but Gavin doesn’t trust them, nor does he like the rumours he’s heard about the places. And it could very well scare Caleb, seeing one of those places, and he might assume Gavin might still want to give him away.

No. no way in hell is Gavin taking Caleb to one of those places.

Normal hospitals offer limited treatment for Pets, but only in emergency situations. Well if this wouldn’t be counted as a emergency situation, Gavin didn’t know what would. Gavin shuddered. His dislike of hospitals is big, but he wouldn’t risk a humans life because of one of his silly dislikes.

Caught deep in thought, Gavin almost misses a turn, and ends up having to do it a little too fast and sharp. Caleb gets caught unready for the sudden change of direction, and hits the car door with his shoulder. He grunts in pain, wrapping his arm around his right side as the movement must have jostled his ribs. Guilt pools in Gavin’s stomach, hot and sharp.

“Shit, Caleb, I am so sorry! Crap… Sorry! I’ll try to drive more careful!” Gavin is aware that he’s being too loud, but he can’t help it. Caleb just has a confused and pained expression plastered on his face. Well, at least he probably didn’t mistake me raising my voice as signs of anger, Gavin thinks.

Gavin decides against saying anything else, knowing that he keeps saying thing that just make Caleb worry more. Shutting up is his best option here. And that he does for the rest of the drive. There are no more issues with Gavin’s terrible driving leading to more pain for Caleb, but the way he takes every breath with extreme caution worries Gavin a lot.

Getting Caleb out of the car needs a little bit of patience and gentle coaxing, fear evident on the smaller man’s still bruised face. It’s obvious Caleb wants to obey, but the fear is keeping him from doing that, causing him even more distress. Eventually, Gavin manages to get him out, promising him that he won’t leave his side, and telling him that he can hold on to him if that makes him feel better.

Cautiously, pale, frail fingers wrap around Gavin’s left arm gently, as Caleb’s worried eyes skim across the parking lot. Gavin smiles reassuringly, lightly placing his bigger hand over the smaller, scarred one clutching to his upper arm.

“You’re doing great Caleb.” Caleb doesn’t look like he’s sure he should be allowed to believe that.

Keeping his pace slow as to accommodate for Caleb’s limp, Gavin starts walking towards the entrance of the hospital. Gavin’s concern spikes at how small and breakable Caleb looks clinging to his arm. It’s only been approximately two days since Gavin first saw Caleb kneeling on the floor before him in Mr. Hughes house, but Gavin already knows that if it came to it, he’d be ready to take bullets for this guy. Caleb deserves more love and care and positive attention then Gavin could ever give him and it burns him up inside that people like his boss would find pleasure and amusement in abusing people like him.

Caleb has a poorly concealed expression of pain spread to every corner of his face, worrying Gavin further.

As they step into the hospital, Caleb moves a little closer to Gavin, so close that he’s pressed right against his side. Gavin takes his hand in his.

“Hey… It’s okay. I won’t leave your side.”

Caleb mumbles a quiet “Thank you Master.” in response.

Once at the reception desk, Gavin contemplates just not mentioning that Caleb is a Pet, but eventually decides against it. The chip would get noticed, and he’d only prologue Caleb’s wait for treatment and get them both into trouble.

So he has to explain to the man at the desk, probably in his early forties with black hair and reading glasses, that he’s actually Caleb’s owner. The man’s smile fades to a frown.

“Oh. You’re one of those people. Well you just need to go right down that hall, and at the far left, you’ll find a door leading to the Pet ward. Good luck finding it.” He does nothing to conceal the disgust in his voice or expression. Gavin nods and smiles, before going in the direction the receptionist pointed him. Guilt blooms in Gavin’s chest once again.

It doesn’t take them too long to get there, even with Caleb’s limp. He’s obviously pushing himself hard to walk fast.

Once in the ward, Gavin is greeted with another reception desk, this time maned by a young blond girl, currently typing something on the computer in front of her. She looks up at Gavin, and then over at Caleb. She frowns at Caleb, probably because of the terrified way he clings to Gavin’s side, and the bruises littering his face and neck.

“Yes?” Her voice has a hint of sadness to it.

“I well… Um…” He points at Caleb. “He’s got like… seriously bad looking broken ribs all along his right side and I don’t know how long he’s had them and he could be dying of internal bleeding and he’s in a lot of pain, like… a lot! And I don’t know if some of the bones pierced some of his internal organs or something! It looks really bad!” Gavin couldn’t stop the spew of words from coming from his mouth, barely remembering that he still has to breath.

“Woah there Mister, calm down! Can you show me how bad it looks?” Quietly apologising to Caleb, he tugs his t-shirt up and shows her his right side. “Yeah… That doesn’t look good… I’ll make sure to get a doctor to see you as soon as possible.” She grabs a piece of bright yellow paper and a pen from the side and hands both to Gavin. “In the meantime, fill this out. Waiting room’s over there.”

She points to a door to the side. Gavin nods and steps into the waiting room, Caleb still clutching to his arm.

There aren’t many other people in the waiting room. There’s an elder lady with a tired expression on her face sitting on a chair with a female Pet sitting at her feet. She looks like a rather high class pet, dressed rather fancily. She has her knees drawn up to her chest an her eyes closed. There is a second woman siting in a chair further away. She looks younger and seriously pissed. She has a male Pet kneeling at her feet, a less high class pet then the other woman. The Pet has his arm cradled to his chest, it looks bent in an odd angle. There is a third Pet kneeling in the corner. It seems his Owner has left him here, probably to impatient or busy to wait with his Pet. The Pet has burns running up and down his arms. They don’t look all too bad, but cover a big enough area to need to have someone have a look at them.

Gavin sits down, making sure that Caleb sits in the chair right next to him. The elder lady seems put off by this. Gavin ignores her displease expression and starts filling out the formalities on the paper. It doesn’t ask much. Just basics, like the owners name, address, phone number and year of birth. It asks even less of the Pet. Merely their number and why they where brought here. Gavin has forgotten Caleb’s number by now. He leans closer to Caleb.

“What’s your number again?” He keeps his voice gentle and quiet.

“43002612” Caleb sounds a bit scared. Gavin can feel him trembling beside him. Gavin puts the paper to the side and turns to Caleb.

“Hey… You’re doing so great. And I really mean it. I know how stressful and scary hospitals can be.” He gently takes his Pet’s hand in his, rubbing his thumb across the back of it. “Is the pain bad? Please be honest.”

Caleb stares at Gavin, hesitating, before very cautiously nodding. Gavin frowns.

“But you’re doing really good.” Gavin smiles. For a moment, Caleb’s eyes seem to brighten up slightly.

It seems to Gavin that it takes ages until they get called out of the waiting room, the elderly lady complaining about them getting called out first in the background as they leave the waiting room.

In the doctor’s office Caleb gets asked to sit up on the examination table and take of his t-shirt. He does so with a bit of aid from Gavin’s part.

The doctor is a smallish man with greying brown hair that looks like he’s done with everything. He moves his chair closer to where Caleb is sitting, and scans his chip.

“Oh, only been his owner for a few days then, huh?” He eyes the bruises covering Caleb. Gavin nods, but says nothing. “Okay then. Lets get on with this then. I don’t have much time. Lay down please.”

Caleb looks at his Master questioningly, and when Gavin nods, he does what is asked of him.

The doctor examines the area by pressing at Caleb’s ribs gently and listening to his lungs.

“Well he has four broken ribs on his right side, that’s for sure, but his lungs are fine. But you’re not getting out of running him through an x-ray.”

“What about internal bleeding?”

“Well. I can’t really determine that from outside. We will run an MRI too to determine that.” Gavin nods.

The doctor runs through some technical things with Gavin whilst Caleb sits next to him silently. Gavin soon notices that there is no way he will be able to join Calen during the tests he’ll have to go through, and begins to worry about him. He promised he’d stay at Caleb’s side. When Caleb catches on to this he clings to Gavin even tighter.

“I know I promised I wouldn’t leave your side. I’m sorry, but I can’t come with you for this. I’m so sorry. But I’ll be right back at your side as soon as I can. And that’s a promise I plan to keep.” Caleb looks scared and unconvinced, but, obedient as ever, lets himself get led away.

This is when Gavin really starts to worry. It’s taking way too long. What if Caleb feels uncomfortable or scared? What if he passed out from internal blood loss? Gavin can feel himself hyperventilating again as he paces the halls of the Pet ward. He tries to get his breathing under control by breathing slowly into his cupped hands and holding his breath for ten seconds. It works moderately, but he still needs to lean against the wall for a moment.

It’s just all so much! A few days ago, he had nothing to do with Pet’s at all, nor did he think he ever would, and now, he owns one, and even might be responsible for his death. Yes, he wasn’t the one to inflict the wounds, but he should have noticed. He should have noticed. He should have took Caleb to the hospital straight away. Gavin rubs the palm of his hands across his face. There are so many things he should or could have done. So many. He just hopes he didn’t do the ones he did too late.

When he spots Caleb limping in his direction alongside a nurse, he feels like he can breath just a little bit freer. He starts bombarding her with questions and she tells him to calm down and that she’ll explain in a moment, sending Gavin’s heart racing with worry again.

Once Caleb is back on the examination table, she explains to Gavin that he hasn’t gotten any internal damage aside from the bruising around his broken ribs, and that the fractures are rather basic, so it will heal on its own.

“They won’t need any further medical treatment, but the rest of him sure does.” She glares at Gavin.

Gavin silently holds Caleb’s hand through out the treatment of the rest of his injuries, caressing the back of his hand with his thumb again. At one point the nurse leans in closer and asks something of Caleb. He shakes his head and says something quietly. The nurse looks up at Gavin.

“He says you didn’t do all this to him.” She gestures at the burn on Caleb’s ribs she’s currently tending to. Gavin shakes his head.

“No. I’ve only…” Gavin sighs. “Only been his… his owner for a short while.” She nods, becoming slightly less hostile towards Gavin.

Once she’s done, Caleb  is bandaged up much neater then the low quality of bandaging Gavin had achieved. The nurse briefly explains some basics about how to care for the different wounds and how all he could do for the broken ribs is let Caleb rest and ice the area.

“What about some stronger pain killers? He’s in a lot of pain… I’ve been giving him Advil, but it isn’t nearly strong enough.”

She almost laughs out loud.

“Oh dear, no. I’m afraid that’s frightfully illegal.” Gavin blinks in confusion.

“What?”

“Prescribing Pet’s strong pain meds is illegal, dear. Have you been living under a rock?” What the hell?! Gavin runs his hands through his hair.

“Yeah. Apparently I have.”

From then on, Gavin tries to get out of there as fast as possible, wanting to get Caleb into an environment with less people, and himself out of the sterile halls of the hospital which seem much narrow for his liking.

When they are finally back in the car, he feels a little bit more relaxed. But he doesn’t trust himself to drive just yet.

“You did really good in there Caleb! You stayed so calm…” Caleb’s eyes brighten ever so slightly again.

“Tha… Thank you Gavin!” Gavin smiles a bit.

“Are you okay? Please answer truthfully.” Caleb stares at Gavin, trembling slightly. He seems to have no idea how to react.

“I guess what I’m asking is, do you need a hug?” Caleb hesitates and Gavin wonders if Caleb even likes such close physical proximity.

“I… I don’t think I… I deserve a… a reward Ma… Master Gavin…” Oh, so that’s what this is about.

“Well. I think you handled yourself really well in there. I think you deserve it.” Caleb looks unsure.

“I… Really?”

“Yes.” Gavin smiles reassuringly.

“Then… I… I’d be happy to a… accept a hug, Master Ga… Gavin”

Gavin manoeuvres himself closer to the passenger seat awkwardly, and gently wraps his arms around Caleb, careful as not to hurt him further. The position is rather uncomfortable for Gavin, the car’s gear stick sticking painfully into his thy, but by the way Caleb leans into Gavin, he really needed the hug, and then Gavin is more than happy to suffer through some minor discomfort for that.

To be honest, Caleb wasn’t the only one that really needed a hug.

[winchester-reload]

I accidentally drunk-posted this to ao3 last night, so I might as well post it here too since it’s episode-related. There’s a second half I’m not done with yet, but this bit stands on its own as a coda, or whatever.

Pairing: Dean/Cas

WC: 1400

tags: first, kiss, angst, episode 14x12 pre-coda

also on ao3

Cas came into the bunker like a thunderstorm, expression cloudy and eyes hot enough to start brush fires. He dropped the big book that’d been tucked close to his chest onto the library table in front of Dean, and it coughed dust as the water-warped pages accordioned together, fluffed up again. Kicked the old, thread-bound cover back, revealing the yellow vellum page; Possessionem, atque tutelam &, Vatican Ed. 1723, it said.

Dean uncurled from his book, hands slipping to the edge of the mahogany as he pulled in tight. Cas wasn’t supposed to be back yet. Last text Dean got said maybe Tuesday would see him in Kansas, and that meant Dean wasn’t supposed to have to deal with this. He should have already been gone.

Wonderful.

He cleared his throat. “Who’s your friend?” he asked, trying to keep it light.

“Oh, that?” Cas puffed, carelessly spilling into the chair opposite Dean. The airiness of his response was drowned out by the vinegar he had pickling his words. “It’s a book, Dean.”

“Well, shit, Cas. You don’t say—?”

“Yes. It’s a book that Jack and I managed to track to— and retrieve from—a catacomb in New York. Now, ask me why we went to all that trouble.”

Dean hesitated. Then, “Why?” because he was nothing if not a glutton for punishment.

“Well, because we heard it had some particularly potent protection sigils, which, might— ” He pecked an elbow onto the tabletop, twisted his hand in an overly-animated open shrug “—hypothetically—be beneficial to someone harboring an unwanted invader. Why? What did you do this last week?”

It was baited. Dean didn’t need the all caps, period-after-each-word, version of it to see that. He chewed his cheeks, slid his copy of Vonnegut away. Dog-eared pages flat against the table now until someone else bothered to pick it up. “Okay,” he said scratching his neck. “I’m gonna go out on a limb here and guess you talked to Sam.”

“What would give you that impression?”

“Cas, it’s a ma’lik box—”

“Yes—” Cas said, mocking, “I’m familiar with them.”

It triggered that little muscle twitch at the back of Dean’s jaw. “Okay, here we go—” and Cas shot back out of his chair.

“Jack and I were out trying to find literally anything that might help you, and all the while you were out building some stupid, secret box to go bury yourself in— And you weren’t even going to tell me—? So, yes, Dean. Let’s “go”,” he spat, throwing the quotes. “Why are you so impossible?”

“Alright, back off—” Dean bristled. He wanted to keep it civil—fuck, he needed to. The last thing he wanted was to have to ruminate on a fight with Cas for the next forever-billion-years, but the asshole was a button-pusher. Always had been. “I get it, okay? You’re pissed. You wanna be pissed, be pissed, but it ain’t gonna change anything. Billie said what she said.”

Cas rounded on him surprisingly quick, leveled a look so dark, it practically bred its own shadows. “No,” he said, flat, “you’re right, of course, it doesn’t change anything. But do you know what does, Dean? The fact that you’re lying!”

A fingernail of shame suddenly surprised Dean, twisted into his chest. “No—” he stumbled. This was getting away from him quick. Too quick. He scoffed, smiled, tried to brush it away. “Uh, no. You’re wrong—”

“Uh, yes. I’m right—” Cas contested. “See, because if Billie’s answer was to bury you with Michael at the bottom of the Pacific, there would have been no death note to hand you— because, in that scenario, Dean, you’d never die! And maybe Sam doesn’t know that, but I do!” He plucked his chest, tie swinging as he leaned in. It dredged up all those old, angelic chills Dean had filed in the archives of his memory; the weight Cas carried with him like churning ozone when he was all keyed up. “So, why don’t you tell me what the book really said?” he suggested with a low growl. “What you’re actually running from.”

Dean swallowed, tried to hold Cas’ eye, failed. They were close enough now that Dean was all but boxed in his chair, and butterflies played his pulse in response, kicked his heart up into his throat. “Okay, you’re—” he started. Then, “But, that’s totally—” and he stopped, watched Cas’ balled fists turn white at the knuckles. Fuck. “Did you tell Sam?”

“No, but I will tell him. I’ll tell him right now.”

“Don’t—”

“Then what did it say?”

“It said I die old,” Dean muttered, and it was like prying nails from his ribs just to get it out. “ It said I die happy. Natural causes. No Michael. No monsters.”

Cas blinked, caught off guard. The anger in his face diffused then fused again into something so much more knotted up. “I don’t understand—”

“There’s nothing to understand because it doesn’t matter! All the rest of ‘em said I die bad, Cas. All of ‘em! Michael burnin’ me out while he destroys the world—!”

“How does ignoring this one spot of hope fix that?”

“That ain’t hope! I don’t know what to do with that— I don’t even know where to begin to try to make something like that happen! The box is what fixes it! The box, I know how to do!”

Cas’ fingers spread, hands coming up like he wanted to strangle Dean, but couldn’t bring himself to get close enough. “Did it ever occur to you—?” he said slowly. Eyes rolling closed before peeling open again. “—that, maybe, your first step in accomplishing a happy ending, is to stop running? To stop this— suicidal ideation? To just... love, and let people love you?”

Dean shook his head, Cas’ words pooling at the hinge of his jaw and making it hurt. “It wouldn’t matter,” he said, looking at the bookshelves, the corners. Anywhere but Cas.

“Why—?”

“Because no one's gonna love me—” Dean spilled. “Who’s gonna love me like this? An archangel stuffed up in my attic and the rest of me so fucking screwed to hell, I can’t even sleep on a good night!”

Cas balled hands into his own chest, shoulders high and body tight like they were both about to go over some invisible cliff if he didn’t stop the vehicle soon. “I love you!” he pleaded. “Sam loves you! Your family— You are not unloved, Dean!” He had tears in his eyes, but it was easier to ignore them.

Dean shut his eyes, heat washing him. The image of Cas dying on an old couch at the back of the barn flared fresh in his brain— I love you, I love all of you— He tried to swallow it, but it was too sour. Tried to rub it away with the heel of his hand, but it only spread, made speckles. He shook his head, instead, pulled his already loose collar looser. “No, I… Not that kinda love,” he said quietly.

Cas suddenly deflated, arms falling to his sides, weight shifting between his feet. He sunk to the floor at Dean’s knees, looked up, face raw and open and done. “Sam loves you,” he said again quietly. “Jack loves you. Your mother—”

“Cas—”

“—loves you…” He suddenly touched Dean’s knee, stretched up onto his own, wedged between Dean’s legs, quiet and hot, cheeks wet with tears as he pulled all that electric energy in. “But, I—” He grabbed Dean’s face, cradled it between his hands as Dean’s fingers clawed into the fabric at Cas’ sleeve— holding him there, holding him back, he wasn’t sure which. “I love you,” Cas whispered. Something in Dean cracked, split open. He let their foreheads brush. Their noses.

Let Cas kiss him, soft and slow.

Cas kissed like he’d imagined it a thousand times, mapped it. Studied it over and over and over again, until every jump of his lips timed with the thrum of Dean’s heartbeat. The curl of his fingers at Dean’s jaw.

Then it broke, quick as it started, but Cas and all his hasty energy didn’t move back. Neither did Dean. “I don’t know another way to say it,” Cas admitted to the small space between them. His voice finally wavered, broke. His hands uncurled, flat palms drying the tears Dean didn’t know he’d lost. “You have to tell me because I don’t know.”

Dean suddenly remembered to breathe and it came in sharp and unsure. It came in with the smell of Cas and a hit of his blue eyes close enough to taste. Dean swallowed the salt building in the back of his throat and dug his voice out of Cas’ rubble. “That was it,” he whispered back. “You just said it.”

And it seemed utterly ridiculous how everything suddenly felt so simple.

[the--blackdahlia]

Revenge of the Sixx (Tommy x Nikki)

Title: Revenge of the Sixx

Prompt: #20 I don't think I can get up

Pairing: Tommy Lee x Nikki Sixx

Requested by: NA

Summary: Nikki sees the guys who attacked Tommy.

Warnings: Homophobic slurs, injuries

Check out my Patreon for more!!!

The entire week, Nikki was fuming. He held it in, but he was so pissed. Every time he looked at Tommy’s black eye or other bruises, he felt that anger just bubbling inside. How dare anyone lay their hands on him? How dare someone leave bruises on him? Tommy told Nikki he was fine, that he didn’t remember who had attacked him, but a night on the strip changed that.

Friday night. They had just played the Roxy and were heading to get some food. Tommy looked across the street and froze. Nikki looked over at him, confused. Then he looked across the street and saw three assholes talking up some girls outside one of the clubs.

Nikki had gone out the night of Tommy’s attack with his knife in hand. He was ready to kill those assholes after what they had done to Tommy, but he hadn’t been able to find them. And here they were, acting like nothing had ever happened. But Tommy knew what had happened, and so did Nikki.

“Hey T-bone, let’s go,” Nikki told him, grabbing his hand. “It’s okay.”

“I’m fine,” Tommy sighed. “I’m okay.” Nikki frowned but nodded.

“Well, I want to go home. We had a long set tonight. And I’m sure Vince will be bringing a party back to the apartment soon.” Nikki told him. Tommy nodded and headed back to the apartment with Nikki. “Oh shit,” Nikki said as they got there. “I think I left my wallet back at the club.”

“Really?” Tommy asked.

“Yeah man. I’m gonna go back and get it. You can just wait here,” Nikki smiled at him. He pulled him to him and kissed him before heading back out. Tommy smiled and shook his head before heading to the room that he was now sharing with Nikki.

And there on the dresser was Nikki’s wallet.

****

Nikki felt his muscles tighten with anger each step he took closer to those fuckheads. One of them still had the remnants of the fight with Tommy on his face. And if it was the wrong guys? Well, Nikki didn’t really care at this point. He saw the way Tommy froze up when he saw them and he would be damned if he let them get away with hurting him.

“Excuse me,” Nikki said, walking up to the guys. The girls that were with them smiled when they saw Nikki. He had that effect on people. But not the guys as they turned to look at him.

“Can I help you?” One of the guys sneered. Nikki smirked as he looked at the bruising on his face, proud of Tommy. This guy, he was going to refer to as the Nose.

“I think so,” With that, he hauled off and punched the guy in the face, knocking him to the ground. The girls screamed and backed away as the guy’s friends jumped to his aid. “That’s for hitting my best friend!” Nikki hissed.

“Oh, the faggot from the other night is your friend?” One guy that Nikki would refer to as Buzzcut, spat.

“You must be that bassist he keeps staring at,” The third guy, who was now named Snake, laughed. “You a faggot too?” Nikki saw red and punched the guy in the gut. Snake went down, but Nose and Buzzcut were right there, taking turns hitting Nikki in the face and chest. Nikki managed to hit Buzzcut in the groin, sending him down. Snake and Buzzcut were on the ground, leaving Nikki and Nose. Nikki smirked at him, wiping blood off his face from one of the hits they had gotten in.

“You ever come near him or any of my band again, a bruised face is going to be the least of your trouble,” Nikki growled. Nose was about to say something when Nikki grabbed his switchblade out of his pocket and flicked it open. “I know plenty of places where no one will come looking if they hear you scream.”

“Okay! Okay! We’ll leave him alone!” Nose said. “Come on guys, get up. We gotta go.” He managed to get his friends up and they ran off. Nikki stood there for a moment, breathing heavy, before he turned and left.

****

Nikki flopped down on the couch, groaning some as he did. The adrenaline had worn off and now he was feeling the pain of his fight. He figured he could just sleep on the couch for the night, but then he felt someone sit next to him.

“You left your wallet here,” Tommy told him. “So what did you go do?” Nikki turned to look at him and Tommy gasped. “What the hell happened?”

“You should see the other guys,” Nikki laughed. Tommy just stared at him. “Babe, I couldn’t let them get away with what they did to you.”

“You could’ve gotten hurt,” Tommy sighed. “Come on, let get you to bed.”

“I don’t think I can get up,” Nikki laughed. “I might just have to live on the couch now.”

“Come on,” Tommy managed to get Nikki to his feet and led him to the bedroom. He helped him get out of his dirty clothes and get into bed. Tommy crawled in beside him, snuggling into his side. Nikki wrapped an arm around him, smiling some. “You didn’t have to do that for me.” Tommy told him.

“Yes I did,” Nikki told him. “No one messes with you besides me. And even then, it’s just pranks.” Nikki told him. Tommy just smiled and played with Nikki’s hair, watching as the bassist drifted off to sleep.

“Thank you,” Tommy whispered before kissing his cheek and going to sleep.

End

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[im-tops-bottom]

So....

Ever since Tony accidentally stumbled upon fanfiction while googling himself to catch up with the news, he's been seeing Bucky in a whole new light. He had always been a soft top and never thought about bottoming. Even when he was with men.

It started off as a fic where he topped both Steve and Bucky. He started gazing at both their asses. Mainly Bucky's. He found it weird that he never got turned on. He did however think about slapping it just for shits amd gigs.

Then Clint caught him while he was reading one about him topping the crap out of Bucky. He was the alpha to Bucky's omega. Clint laughed at the red faced Tony and told him to check out the 'bottom Tony' fics because alot of them a real good.

"how do you know about all this?"

"anything related to you taking it up the ass really gets me and Nat going. Oh all the things we did because of you"

"thanks? I guess"

"no problem. Have fun"

That is when things really started to kick in. It started off as the fic Clint suggested and Tony couldn't help but blush and/or stutter when he was in the same area as Bucky.

After the whole civil thing, Tony tried to use his anger on Steve and Hydra and Bucky to calm himself down but it never worked. Sure he forgave Bucky because it wasn't him but surely his anger towards Steve and hydra should have kept him sane.

Well as sane as one could get after he spent a whole night reading everything on ao3 where he was the sub to Bucky's Dom. And oh shit did he have trouble keeping calm around Bucky.

He told Clint after he spent 3 days pent up in his workshop, not because he had work to do, no he was already ahead of the game, but because he checked out the bottom Tony tag and the omega tony tag only looking at anything to with him and Bucky.

"I thought the angsty stuff would help but even then.....holy shit fans can get crazy and know too much"

"yeah well when your life has been plastered all over the news since before you were born, people tend to know stuff. It also helps when you say them on live national television"

"what do i do Clinty boo? I feel like I'm having panic attacks whenever he's around me but I can't leave the room. My body isn't allowing it"

"well you can start off by not calling me Clinty boo"

"cliiiiiiint"

"okay okay calm down. how are things between the two of you?"

"hopeless. I can't talk to him. I am still angry with what happened in Siberia. Well I forgave Bucky but the fight still haunts me. Watching that video still gets to me. I can't be around Steve without starting an argument. I think Bucky hates me because I attached his best friend which I'm pretty sure who he is dating because why not. The love between those two knows no bounds. Have you seen the old tapes? They clearly were in love. I also think Bucky thinks I hate him. Steve doesn't like leaving him alone with me. See! Romance of the ages"

"in that case use that to help keep you going. You are in the same room, remember what you just told me. Alone together, use that. If Steve is in the room, keep your attention on Steve and thr anger can keep you going"

"but Everytime im in the same room as the soldier, nothing but adult content plays in my mind"

"god i don't know if that is lust or you are"

"you finish that sentence and i swear to God"

"oh god your falling for your parents killer"

"hey it wasn't his fault. Hydra made him d- you were just saying that to rile me up weren't you?"

"and it worked. You are a hopeless cause"

At that moment Natasha walks in and sits behind Tony to cuddle him.

"who's a hopeless cause? Because I'm seeing two in this room"

Clint looks offended and Tony just laughs at Clint.

"Tony is thank you very much"

"and who are we blaming?"

Clint's eyes widen as he looks up and Nat follows them and raises a brow. Tony is completely oblivious as he has his head dowm and is currently playing with his fingers.

"Bucky"

Nat looks at Clint and Clint nods his head. Nat sighs as she hugs Tony tight.

"and what did our residental brainwashed assassin do?"

Tony with a redface explains what's been going on for pass year and never once looks up. Never once notices Clints sad face or Nat's smirk or the shocked faces of two people by the doorway.

"so you are pissed off with Steve still and madly in love with Bucky?"

"I'm not really pissed. It's just that he hurt me and I don't know how to come back from that. I was so gone with Steve and then the lies came and he chose his side. The anger helped me get over him but it changed me in more ways then one. I feel like I can forgive him but I don't ever want to go down that road with him ever again"

"have you ever told Steve this?"

"are you kidding Nat!?!"

"Clint shut up"

Tony jolts in surprise and looks up to spot the two super soldiers. Steve walks up to Tony and gets on his knees and grabs Tony's hands softly.

"Clint, Nat can you guys leave the room?"

"hell no!"

Nat drags an annoyed Clint with him. Clint screams out "I don't trust you guys even for a second. Friday make sure they don't hurt Tony"

"will do Mr Barton"

Once the spies leave, everything gets intense.

"Tony look at me"

Tony looks everywhere but at Steve.

"please?"

Steve pleads causing Tony to stare at him in surprise. Steve looks hurt, scared, worried, pained, guilty. Tony looks away again causing Steve to sigh.

"I know that I lost your trust amd I'm wary around y-"

"please don't"

"Tony"

Tony rips his hands out of Steve's and stands up shaking.

"not now. Just please. Not now"

Tony knows he's being a coward but he can't help it. Not when it comes to Steve and Bucky. He runs all the way up to the penthouse. Running up the stairs because there's less of a "oomph"

Tony feels pain and also his body being rolled over so he's on his back. He notices that panic had taken him up to his penthouse and he had just made outside his room before he could even tell Friday to lock the penthouse up. His body is shaking amd he's having trouble breathing.

"hey hey hey easy there fella"

He feels the body on top of him grab a hold of his shaking hands and hold them against a naked chest. A flesh is holding both his hands against it while the metal hand is rubbing his hip softly.

"Bucky?"

"it's me buddy. No talking. Just breathing. Follow me now. There we go"

Moments later after following along Tony begins to breathe normally again. He feels Bucky pick him up and carry hjm to the bed. He feels Buckys hand lay his head onto the chest and the sound of Bucky's heartbeat lulls him to sleep.

When Tony wakes up he stretches and it's not until he opens his eyes when his body decides to jolt and he let's out a Yelp causing the body under him to wake up. He becomes shocked as Bucky pulls tony against him as he holds out a gun scanning the area while growling. Tony places a hand on the stretched out arm.

"easy there four seasons. No one is here. I was surprised, that's all. Hey hey hey James look at me"

Bucky turns his head and looks Tony dead in the eye. Tony smiles as he manages to lean back.

"look at me! I'm alive. I'm in good health shut up Friday"

"yes boss"

"now put the gun down. I'll even let you check me over"

After a couple of seconds contemplating, Bucky puts the gun down and checks over Tony and calms down knowing that he is indeed okay.

"now Buckaroo, mind telling me what that was about?"

"I thought I heard you screaming"

"yeah I was surprised to find you here that's all"

"but I was the one that helped you through your attack"

"I know I realize that now. Why did you come after me?"

"to make sure you were okay and it was a good idea anyway"

"that's sweet and all but if you were there for the whole thing then you would know that things aren't really going well at the moment"

"Winter was angry"

"and why was he angry?"

"because of everything that's happened. We were both sad because even though you forgave us, you did everything you could to either stay away from us or look at us in disgust. It hurt"

"okay fair enough. But that wasn't directed at you. It was really directed at Steve and Hydra and myself"

"but you said"

"I know what I said. But did you hear the part where I said I tried but I couldn't so I was disgusted with myself be-"

Tony is surprised as he gets cut off by Bucky who is kissing him. After what felt like forever Bucky pulls away and smiles as Tony leans his forehead on top of Bucky's.

"heres what we are going to do genius. You, in all of your Stark confidence is gonna March down there and talk it out. it's been long over due and I think you killed the man after every thing you said"

"but"

"no buts Tony. Then after that we are gonna have our long over due talk. Once everything is said and done, I'm gonna take you out"

"with a gun?"

"on a date?"

"but why?"

"because it has come to my attention that you didn't notice how I acted around you because you were to busy reading fanfiction and thinking that I was dating Steve"

"aren't you?"

"no. He doesn't even swing that way. Just be glad that you never told him your feelings in the first place"

"I guess you are right"

"great"

Tony yelps as Bucky slaps his ass hard and pushes him off the bed. Tony goes red as Bucky smirks at him.

"what the hell was that for?"

"you amd Clint aren't the only ones who read that Smutty crap. That's okay though because we can make up for all that after our date"

"so we just come back and read?"

"you ain't thr only one to read bottom Tony fics. There are a few there that have given me ideas on what to do with you"

"what?"

"from what I heard"

Bucky still smirking, stands up and slides behind Tony before embracing him. His dick which had gone hard pressed up against Tony as he pulls tony against him. He leans down to whisper sexily into Tony's ear as his hands hold his waist.

"I'm about to pop your cherry tonight. Who knew playboy Tony Stark has a v-card for something. Men and women dont know what they're missing out on. Too bad that your mine now."

Bucky leaves a hickey on Tony's neck as he grinds down on him. He chuckles as he steps back and a redfaced Tony turns around.

"you evil man!"

Bucky licks his lips as his eyes roam Tony, smirk not once leaving his face. His eyes stop by Tony's and he thinks that maybe he can change his mind.

"how about this evil man deflowers you right now?"

Tony takes a step back

"but what about Steve?"

"fuck Steve"

"no thank you"

Tony falls back onto the bed and Bucky follows along with him.

The next day an exhausted Tony is finally let out of bed. After a quickie in the shower, he demands that Bucky puts clothes on him and then carries him down to breakfast.

Bucky instead picks him up and carries the screeching, naked Tony down two floors and on to his and Steve floor. He kicks open the door to a startled Steve's room and throws the naked Tony at him. Naked Tony lands right on Steve's lap causing the both of them to go red.

"talk!"

Is all Bucky says before leaving the room to go get dressed. After half an hour, Bucky checks on the two hoping they didn't kill each other as there hadn't been any yelling since he left. What shocks him is what he sees when he opens the door.

A naked Tony riding an equally naked Steve. He let's them finish before he smirks and raises a brow while crossing his arms. He licks his lips as Tony slumps forward against Steve.

"I thought you weren't gay"

"I thought you weren't into Tony"

"that's my boyfriend"

"who I just fucked. What are you going to do about it?"

"best friends share"

"shut it Tony"

"just saying. I have choices you know"

"and your choices are as follows, you either walk away from all this, pick someone or and I can't believe I'm saying this, get your naked ass on that bed and let us have our way with you"

"I would prefer walking away from all this"

Bucky laughs as he knows the reason why he chose that option. He decides to be a little shit anyway.

"oh you picked the third option. Well aren't you just a nice guy."

Steve looks confused and stares at Bucky.

"it's because he hadn't been let out my dick all night until an hour ago before we came here"

Bucky hops on the bed and pats his lap.

"let's see how skilled Stevie is. I am so confused and a little turned on right now. Steve dear, do not pull out. Bring the genius over here and I'll just slide into his dm's right next to ya. Tony I plan on being the first to do everything on that v-card of yours. It's gonna be a first for everything"

And just like that Bucky and Tony found out that Steve was bi and had been into Tony since they first met. After an actual talk and hashing everything out, thanks to Bucky, Tony does a whole set of new things for the first time and it's been nothing but wonderful. Well if you can call it that.

*3 days later*

"I think I'm dead."

Tony drops on to Clint's lap looking warn out. Clint feeds Tony some of what he is eating and when he hears Tony's stomach growl, calls nat to bring home extra food. He gives Tony a massage while Tony spills out the juicey gossip.

"you do know Nat is gonna want to hear about this"

"yeah well she can wait while I get the massage ever. God your fingers are magic"

"I would ask if you wanted a test trial but Tweedledee and Tweedledum look like they want to murder me already"

"I'm naked and you are magical of course they are. They can't have this body for the next week. I'm done! You hear me! Done! My legs are jelly, my ass and throat are sore, i look like i got mauled by a vampire, no one should be Cummings that much that isn't superhuman or a god. I'm gonna be feeling it for days. Clint be m bodyguard for the next week"

"no problem Tony. Friday initiate protocol Clint's Baby Genius"

"yes sir"

"oh god you named it that?"

Clint ignores Steve and Buckys screams as they run down the hallway and back up to their room in order to continue looking after Tony.

Nat returns amd laughs as the boys recount everything that happened as they eat and watch movies for the rest of the night.

"friday activate Natasha's shell head please"

"yes ma'am"

"I hate you but love you both at the same time"

"love you too shell head"

Tony groans as the spies laugh.

[maagicmiss]

Endgame spoilers !! Beware the spoil !!

This movie was amazing. With a lot of humor, which never fall flat. I was dumbfounded from the beginning to the end tbh Nobody asked for it but there is my hot take of Avengers 4 :

I felt really bad for Thor because ya know, depression™️ but damn the surprise/shock made me laugh. Noobmaster is an absolute evil that we need to end. They kinda did him dirty, I really wasn’t wanting for that but eh 🤷🏻‍♀️ Broken man 😔 Everytime I think about how much he lost I die inside a little more. Rocket was the real best dude here. Cheers to him. I was so fck happy for him when he got his hammer back !!! Like !!! "I’m still worthy" !!!!! You go you funky thunderous man !!! He deserves to be happy at all cost. Protect this man. During the last battle I was shook, with both his hammer and axe, fighting the purple asshole, so cool. Amazing, truly. Also, when he gave Valkyrie the commandment ?? My queen. She’s now my queen. By the way, we all know who’s in command of the Guardians now 🔥🔥😂

I can’t exprim how much I was sad for Natasha. When I saw them climbing this damned mountain I understood it was over for her 😭😭 I will love her until my dying breaths. She did deserve better but she died protecting her family, and the earth. She was the one who fought until the end, who did everything she could, and managed to avenge the earth. Thanks to her Thanos was defeated. Let’s honor her 😭👊🏻🔥

Clint. Like, dude. Pain. Angst. A bit of stupidity but that’s Clint so yeah. The assasinsbowl was ofc won by Natasha, and he lived. I would’ve been pissed if he died because he killed all this (bad indeed) people out of pettiness and sadness and anger for his family but he would’ve let himself die ? I understand. But like, dude. No. You’re a father. A husband. Natasha was ofc going to sacrifices herself instead of you.

HULK !!! My man. He’s happy and that’s all that matter 😭❤️ We stan a confident and humourus man y’all (Im still waiting for a height joke when Scott got aaaaaall huge in the end rip) Also, him being ashamed of his past self ??? Amazing. I couldn’t even in my wildest dreams lol I was dead when he met the old sorceress and got kicked out of his body lmaoo

STEVE. Or best known as America’s ass. Bae. I love that man. Everybody does. He did it. He did all his possible and it payed off. Also what a quick learner. When the hammer got lift, I was "W H O ???" Tbh I was thinking Loki, like "yo surprise bitches" but it was way better xD I think I screamed lmaooo But man, so fucking cool and impressive. That scene where he stand alone in front of Thanos and of his whole army ? With his broken shield ? I C O N I C. I am already seeing all the edit, gif, tribute, fanart and fanfic about it. I can’t wait y’all. Although, I was a bit disappointed about his closure ? Like yeaaah it was neat but... idk....... a bit dissatisfied and disappointed. The Steve/Steve was funny but also sad, idk. Although, Steve in the elevator saying Heil Hydra was beautiful.

Tony. I need to say it. Steve did him dirty. Like. Poor man. He didn’t deserve that, at all. I would’ve preferred Steve snapping down Thanos than him. He’s a father !! A husband too !!! Steve promised to him he wasn’t going to die. LIES, ALL LIES. I’m salty. But no hate for the blond man please. In the end, it was Tony choice. In the end with "The proof that Tony Stark has a heart" was heartbreaking. I wasn’t ready AT ALL. I’m not his biggest fan but oh damn, Sadness got me down. His daughter ? Pain. The little kid from Iron man 3 ?? Pain. Happy being sad ? Pain. Pepper ? Pain. I’m dead. He deserved better 😔 When he met his dad, I was dying. Dying of sadness but also of joy. Glad he could talk to him, and even hug him !!!!

Carol !!! THE bitch. I love her. She could walk on me and I would apologize. We didn’t saw her that much but ya know, it’s cool. I gave her entry a 9/10 because there wasn’t thunder lol (unlike Thor in Infinity War, who rightfully had a mighty 10/10). She was a queen. That haircut ? Beautiful.

Nebula. She’s my bae. Protect her. She’s doesn’t seem to need it but she does. Baby. She baby. But she’s a dangerous baby so be careful lmao Her killing in cold blood her past her (??? Was that suicide ?? Or murder ?? Or murder suicide idk ???) to protect her past sister was tragically sad and heartbreaking and beautiful. I’m saying a lot beautiful but hey I’m doing my best with my limited vocabulary. Nebula and her, and the guardian deserves happiness. Lowkey shooketh that nobody saw it was the past Nebula and not the right one but I’m going to excuse them by saying it the excitement of having all Infinity stones and of sadness for Natasha. Other way I’m about to throw hands 🤬😤

Iconic moment :

Carol saving Tony’s ass. We all knew that was how it gonna to happen but I was so relieved. 9/10.

Thor killing in cold blood Thanos in front of everyone, dead inside was wow, brutal. Not happiness out of it, no recomfort. Merciless, brutal, cold. He was here for the head and he got it. 7/10

Not an iconic moment but shush. The five years later ? I was astonished. It must have been 5 painful years. The world was in shred, dusts and broken people everywhere. Pain. Everything is blue, melancholic, broke. If I was one of the missing people coming back I would tell to every fucking one that joke "Hey, I’m gone like 5 seconds and everybody go apeshit ? What would you all do without me ?" Yeah im that bitch lmao 10/10 because you feel that emptiness and sadness.

Tony joining the idiots and Tired Steve™️ with an actual good plan in his fancy car with a lot of skids and other fancy stuff ? 10/10 good one, boi

That scene from Avengers 1 ? Then them on the side ? 6/10

Steve in that elevator ? You already know. 9/10

Steve commenting on his own ass ?? 1000/10 Trust me, it’s fair. Were waiting for that since Avengers 1.

I love Steve

Loki ?? Man, that dude is a joke but I love him. The face he made when he saw the case slide.... beautiful. The face he made when he jumped in the time hole ??? Iconic. 10/10. I want to know how everything is gonna to play with his series. I wanted more of him tbh I even was waiting for him in the last battle. By the way, is he still dead ? If he never went to Odin.... idk. Lowkey confused here.....

And last but not least :

The final battle.

Damn.

The fight between Iron Man, Thor, Captain and Thanos was intense. I was on the edge of my seat lmao It reminds me of their fight in Avengers 1, in the forest, for Loki. They were fighting against each other, now they’re fighting together 🔥👊🏻❤️ 9/10

Steve picking up the hammer ? 10/10 No comment, it’s fair. (The "I knew it" of Thor was priceless)

Steve getting a rematch on Thanos with both his shield and Hammer ? I C O N I C. 9/10 because it didn’t last long in my opinion.

Steve in front of the whole army ? Alone ? The face dirty of dirt and blood, the shield cut in half ? After he slowly stood up, even tho he was tired and probably had broken ribs ? How dare you not applause. That old man was ready to fight them all, and to fucking die. Stupid but amazing. 1001/10. Slightly better than him commenting on his own ass lmao (tag me if u ever do a fanart of this scene please)

Sam calling Steve ? Not iconic but still. I was dying and it cured me. My skin is clear, my debt are payed off, my grades are perfect and I’m now immortal.

The Powerful Women squad ? Damn. I love it. Sign me up for 10 movies about their shenanigans around the universe. 10/10

All the dead one coming back to life ? All the dead coming through the portals ? And looking badass af ?? Doctor Strange ? Wong ? Wanda ? Sam ? Bucky ? Spider man ? The Guardians looking sharp ? Black Panther with his sister and Okoye ? The Wankanda Army ? The spatial ships ? EVERYONE ????? Bitch Please, it was perfect. 10/10.

Tony snapping ? "I’m Iron Man." I was euphoric. 10/10. Then I was really sad. So 10/pain

"Proof that Tony Stark has an heart" ? A painful 7/10.

As you can read, I loved that movie. Like, very much, but, I’m a bit dissatisfied about the music. The Russos were idk, timid ? Shy about it. Most of them were old one, the themes of the characters and the principal theme (the one from avengers 1). Nothing too extraordinary, nor extravagant. Can do better.

Also, idk why but I found that Hulk was a bit weird ? Idk he seemed emotionless ? Maybe it’s only me but I didn’t like that much the CGI of Hulk this time.

Wanda. She barely spoke. Rip

Tony’s death. He shouldn’t have died.

Steve’s old days/death/idk. I’m not buying it. I don’t like it either. Glad Sam is Captain America now tho. Sad for Bucky. The dude is gonna end up alone in 2022 (or idk what years) with only Sam and Steve’s grandchildren or idk Rip dude

There is soooo much to say about this movie. Like, I write something down and something else is immediately coming up x) Maybe I’ll edit stuff later.

[the-barn-rat]

IB 1. Dianora Brixie, Sk.

SUP FOLKS i’ve decided im literally going to just post monster hunters (working title Iron Bound) as i fucking write it?? because 1. i really like hearing what people think about what’s happening/what’s going to happen as i go, which ties into 2. I Want The Validation

this is literally a fresh completely unedited draft, so there will be a lot of changes & additions, especially to descriptive setting prose. that being said, if there’s specific shit you want to hear more about immediately, lemme know and i’ll make sure it goes in draft 2

These posts will all be tagged “monster hunters draft” in case you want to track them or don’t want to see them!

WITHOUT FURTHER ADO: that monster hunters shit i’ve been planning since like november

.....

Sigi is the only one who can tell that she is distracted. They are twins, and so they know each other’s tics and tells, but it still feels like a weakness. He eyes her across the table, squints and tilts his head—dark and owlish like hers, with sharper angles—and she lets out a long breath through her nose, ignoring him. A folded-up letter sits heavy in the pocket of her waistcoat. Dia can’t think about it now.

At the centre of the cabin, the hunter kneels for preparation. She could be made of lifeless bronze but for the steady rise and fall of her breastplate. The mentor, whose virtue-name is Eager, clasps golden ornaments into her hair and onto her black horns.

There’s a murmur outside, beyond the stone walls and locked shutters. Townspeople have gathered, doubtless fascinated by the spectacle of a hunting crew. Dia ignores them in favour of the crossbow resting in front of her: she fidgets with it, checks the springs and sights and checks them again. There is nothing wrong with the crossbow, but she needs to occupy her hands.

Eager steps back, and the hunter stands. Dia never feels right sitting down when the hunter stands. The hunter is too tall, too broad, and it makes her nervous. She feels as though she must be ready to flee or hide at any moment, however futile an exercise that would be.

At least this one is Cornuta, and not one of the stranger breeds. Not Seguna with their twisted animal faces, or fish-like Pescqui with their gills. Hollow comforts. This hunter could still slaughter all of them if she chose to. If the rumours are true, she might yet choose to.

Eager produces an elegantly carved mahogany box, about the size of his own palm. He presses his thumb to the rune on its front, and it opens for its keeper. The single vial inside glows a soft, sickly yellow-green.

“In defense of the common folk, your masters,” Eager intones, “sharpen your senses and steel your mind.”

Wordlessly, the hunter takes the vial, uncaps it, and swallows its contents. If Dia were closer, she might see the hunter’s pupils shrink down to dots for a breath and then dilate until her irises are slender lilac rings. Dia prefers not to be closer until absolutely necessary.

Sigi fits a belt of flasks and tiny grenades around the hunter’s hips. Dia slides the crossbow into the hunter’s hands, checks the straps on her quivers, and backs away.

The pathfinder speaks: “It was last sighted eight miles north of town, in a valley bog between two nameless peaks. We have no expert testimony, but eyewitness accounts continue to support our initial conclusion that the creature is a green hag.”

“You hear that, Ferro?” Eager says, addressing the hunter directly. “This is a fawn’s assignment.”

The hunter nods once, terse. In theory, her kind can speak. Dia has never heard this one’s voice.

“Medic, is she sound?” Eager says.

The medic, Antare, has not risen from his seat at the table. “Do you reckon she injured herself kneeling on the floor?” he asks.

Eager reddens. His mouth twists underneath his full silver-specked beard. “The rituals are not for nothing,” he starts.

Antare sighs, but he stands. He’s the tallest and broadest of them, the only one who can look the hunter right in the eye. Dia has wondered privately if that’s why they sent him to replace the last medic. If she snaps again, he’s the only one with half a chance.

The medic stands square before the hunter. “The body is sound,” he says.

Eager says, “You haven’t…”

Antare cuts him short. “I checked her over at dawn,” he says. “She’s in excellent health. The body is sound.”

“The path is clear,” says the pathfinder, effectively delaying the inevitable argument.

“The steel will bite,” says Dia.

“The fire will burn,” says Sigi.

Eager collects himself. “Murat’s light guide you to your quarry,” he says. “In his name, Valiera’s Nezetta Six Ferro, strike true.”

The hunter gives a shallow, wordless bow from the hips, and otherwise does not respond to any of the proceedings. Eager unlatched and opens the door, and the smell of pig shit and springtime mud billow in before the hunter steps out.

The small gathered crowd flows away from her like water. They fall silent, staring up at this tamed creature of legend. She may well be the first and last they ever see; Apla is a small, unimportant farming village well-protected from most fronts of the First War. This hag is an irregularity at best.

She stands there, not looking at the people, until Antare brings the horse they bought from one of the farmers for well above its value. It looks small and scruffy beside the hunter. When she sits astride, it drops its parrot-mouthed muzzle and arches its ewe neck as though it knows that this is the most important thing it will do in its life.

A murmur starts to rise again from the farmers. Dirty-faced and small-minded, they cast wide-eyed glances at each other, up at the hunter, at the crew standing behind her. Dia knows what they will say, to each other and to Eager and to whomever else is stupid enough to stay outside the tower for longer than necessary. They will continue to say it until the hunter returns with the head of a hag.

Eager senses the shift. “My friends,” he booms, opening his arms wide. “The hunter is strong and true. She will bring your tormentor’s end.”

“We sure that ain’t a demon also?” someone says.

“Go, hunter,” Eager intones. “Win their hearts and minds with the highest gift.”

The hunter swings the horse about and kicks it into a trot, and then a gallop. None stand in her way. Dia watches horse and rider disappear up the dirt road, between the pig farms and into the encroaching woods.

Dia tunes out the villagers’ concerns as well as Eager’s responses to them. As soon as the hunter is out of sight, she turns back into the tower, giving Sigi a look on her way past. He understands and follows her up to the third level, to the bed chamber she claimed as hers.

Sigi goes to open the shutters on the single window.

“Don’t,” Dia says. “I can’t stand the fucking smell.”

Her twin shrugs. “City smells worse.”

“That’s why we don’t live in the city, either.”

Sigi smirks. “That and no other reason, right?” he says.

Normally, she would laugh. This time, she half-turns away from him and rubs at her eyes. His face falls; she reaches into her pocket and pulls out the folded-up letter.

“Courier caught me right before we boarded the Olunaria,” she says. “I forgot about it until this morning.”

When she holds it out to him, he approaches it like a skittish deer. He reads it in silence, a small frown wrinkling his brow. He does not shed a tear; neither had she. They were never close to their lord father.

“What does it mean for us?” he says carefully, once he’s through.

Dia sighs. “Hopefully, very little. We weren’t expecting an inheritance, were we?”

“No, I meant…” Sigi says. “Should we go to Brixi? Cecilia may need us.”

“Cecilia needs us as far away as possible,” Dia snorts. “If we go now, the nobility will decide that Signore Fiadri’s bastard twins have come to mine the estate.”

“Or perhaps that Signore Fiadri’s bastard twins have come to their sister’s aid in her time of mourning,” Sigi says. He is charmingly naïve, sometimes.

“It doesn’t matter,” she says. “We can’t leave the crew now.”

He doesn’t argue. He folds the letter up and slips it back into her pocket. “I’ll be in the cellar,” he says. “Knock before you come in.”

And that’s the end of that, she supposes. They ought to write to Cecilia, eventually, but that will fall to Dia. Sigi is better at expressing emotions, but Dia knows how to avoid political misunderstandings.

There is no one here to call for wine. This little tower is barely maintained and has not hosted a hunting crew in years.

Dia goes to the pantry on the main floor, freshly stocked with bread, cheese, eggs, cured pork, and root vegetables from the local baron’s kitchen. The carrots and turnips are firm and fresh, but they’re not what she wants.

“No drink allowed in a sentinel tower,” says a voice at the door. The pathfinder leans against the frame, a performative boredom etched across his face. Every member of the crew is well-dressed and groomed, but the pathfinder’s class is still obvious to a trained eye. He wears silks, embroidery, and ennui like the wearing is sport.

He pats the limestone wall. “These are sacred stones.”

Dia stands up straight and gives a short curtsy. It feels ridiculous when she’s wearing breeches and a waistcoat. It must look ridiculous, too, because the pathfinder gives a snort of mocking laughter.

“My lord,” Dia starts.

“We could see if Apla has a tavern,” he says. “Though they’re as like to brew pig piss into ale as grain.”

She says nothing. He looks her up and down.

“I’ve heard the Fiadri is short a patriarch,” he says. Dia feels a misplaced flare of anger at his flippancy, but then she notes the wine skin dangling from his hand. He holds it out toward her. “Lesson one of crewing: bring your own.”

Dia takes the wine skin. “Thank you, my Lord,” she says. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

The pathfinder’s brow knits. He tips his head back to squint at her down his aristocratic nose. He always manages to look tired, but now the circles under his eyes are especially pronounced.  “Aren’t you highborn? You’ll take my wine, but you can’t say my name?”

Dia carefully keeps her expression neutral. “Forgive me. It’s safer to stand on ceremony.”

“Fair enough. Drink, it’s Luquian.”

She does. The wine is good: robust and sweet, blooming on her tongue for a long breath after she swallows. She tries to hand the skin back, only to have the pathfinder push it away.

“I have more,” he says. “A Kyriak dry white and a Sahnish spiced red. Both excellent.”

“Each more expensive than that farmer’s horse, I’ll wager,” Dia said, but she took another drink of the Luquian.

“A discerning Brixian palate,” says the pathfinder.

“My lord is too generous,” Dia says, to see if he insists.

“Corso,” says the pathfinder. “Valiera, if you must, though I’m about as near the Valiera seat as you are the Fiadri. If you really think about it, we’re equals.”

“You’re no bastard.”

“Neither do I hope for my brothers to die,” he said, somehow blunt and nonchalant at once. It occurs to Dia that this might be Corso Valiera’s way of offering his condolences. She won’t ask how he knew; information is a pathfinder’s currency. She takes another drink.

“Corso,” she says.

“Dianora,” he says. “There, now we can be colleagues.”

Below their feet, something rumbles like distant thunder. The pathfinder’s thick black brows climb, and Dia sighs and hands him the wineskin. “He’s the more emotional between us,” she offers, by way of explanation.

“And yet you’re the one hiding in the pantry, sharing illicit drinks with your patron’s fifth-born,” says Corso. “At least that sounded productive.”

Dia’s scalp tingles with embarrassment. “I had neither the time nor the space to bring my prototypes,” she snaps.

“Easy, there,” he says and, maintaining eye contact, takes a drink.

She realises, suddenly, that he’s still standing in the doorway, effectively blocking her path. Eager is outside with the masses. Sigi is in the cellar with his concoctions. Antare’s movements are nigh impossible to track. Corso Valiera outranks them all by far.

Dia’s heart beats rabbit-quick. Idiot. “I should go,” she says, controlling her tone. “My sister will expect a reply.”

The pathfinder hums. “Right, yes,” he says. “The worst part, this. The performance. The determination of what parts and pieces of your grief to display, to hide, to inflate for others to notice.”

He seems to turn inward, eyes distant and faded. Dia makes for the door, and the pathfinder stands up straight, blocking her path. He’s not much taller or older than her, but he’s broader and stronger. She doesn’t look him in the eye.

“Take this,” he says.

Dia blinks. The wineskin hangs between them, still mostly full. She reaches out and carefully takes it by the neck, and the pathfinder looks down at her.

“My advice, for what it’s worth, is to write at least four letters and burn the first three.”

She’s quiet and still for long enough that he notices, sighs, takes several deliberate steps backward. It’s the sudden release of tension from a spring, knocking the fear out of her lungs.

“You have nothing to fear from me, Dianora,” he says. When she looks up, he winks. “I’m shocked that you haven’t heard the rumours.”

She has, actually. She assumed they were slander. “I apologize,” she says stiffly. “I’m sure you are an honourable man. I have wronged you with groundless conjecture…”

He waves her off. “Go write your sister,” he says.

A part of her still expects that he’ll stop her as she goes by, but he doesn’t, and she’s left to feel childish and strangely dirty as she half-jogs up to her chamber. She hates it. It’s not Corso Valiera’s fault, really. He gave up a dangerous truth to calm her. Dia wondered, once a heavy door was closed and locked behind her, if he somehow knew or sensed the truth about her.

She takes his advice about the letter, sort of. The first sheet of parchment is utterly wasted on failed greetings alone:

I am so sorry to have heard—

My deepest condolences, dear sister—

We have just received—

This awful spectre follows us to Apla, where—

Father’s timing is impeccable as always—

Dia takes a long pull from the wineskin, corks it, and buries her face in her hands. She might sit there for a minute or an hour, and then she burns the parchment over a candle.

Hoofbeats drum on the dirt road outside. Dia starts: that’s quick, much too quick, even for a hag. She cracks the shutters, holding her nose against the smell. The shaggy brown horse gallops home, riderless.

Dia rushes down the stairs, teetering only once with drink. Corso and Antare stand in the doorway; Eager is outside among the people, has been for hours. Dia stands between the two men, peering out, listening.

“Is it dead? Is the demon dead?”

“We’re doomed. It’ll come for us next.”

“You said the hunter would stop it!”

“It ate my goats.”

“Liar!”

Eager stands, stoic and still, with a hand on the horse’s bridle. The beast is unharmed, without a drop of blood on it that Dia can see. A man comes wading through the crowd, and Eager hands him the reins.

“She has sent the horse back,” Eager intones. “You see? She has returned him unharmed to his master. The hunter will follow in time.”

“He speaks with confidence,” Antare mutters.

“An impressive front,” Corso replies. “He’s about to piss himself, as he should be.” Both Dia and Antare shoot him a look. The pathfinder shrugs and meanders deeper into the tower, ignoring the throng outside and leaving Antare to shut the door.

“I wasn’t aware you were concerned,” says Antare.

“You didn’t see the body,” says Corso. “To be frank, we should already have a courier running back to my father.”

Dia understands, belatedly. “You think she’s gone feral. So suddenly?”

Corso levels her with a look. “You didn’t see the body,” he says again. He shakes his head, almost imperceptibly, and leans against the table at the centre of the room. He looks exhausted. “Maybe, when this is over, we’ll all be reassigned to something normal. I’m fond of the Ottiudi strain, myself, which of course means that the Signore will give me a Seguna. What are the two of you being punished for, by the way? I never asked.”

Antare says nothing. Dia swallows. “We wanted to work a hunting crew,” she says to fill the silence. “Your brother…”

“Ah, yes, right,” says Corso. “The University man himself. I suppose it was the best he could do for a pair of bastards. Terribly sorry that you’ve stepped out into this mess, green as grass.”

Dia has read the last medic’s journals, of course. They all have, but the tension in the pathfinder’s voice is a stretched bowstring, ready to snap. Drinking wine in the pantry, Corso’s face had been a healthy, warm brown. Now, it’s gone grey.

Antare stares out the window like it holds a puzzle he can’t quite solve. “Why would she run off now? She must know she’ll be hunted in turn.”

“You talk like she is a rational, thinking creature,” says Corso. “She was not thinking then, and she is not thinking now. I’ll draft a letter to my father.”

The door swings open. “You’ll do no such thing,” Eager says. “Have a little faith. She either fell off the horse or sent him back and out of danger.”

Corso presses his lips together. Dia thnks that gesture is all that keeps him from yelling at a Brother of Murat.

“You fear her,” Eager says.

“Bloody right I do,” says Corso.

“As you should,” the mentor says, nodding sagely. “As one fears the wolf, or the mountain-lion, or the summer storm. She is a force of nature. She has not lost her mind to a hag.”

Corso scoffs.

Eager presses on. “Do you remember what she was, before? The monsters she slew? She can be that again. It is our task to keep faith and to help her reclaim herself.”

The pathfinder complains, but the mentor helms the ship. They wait. Eager goes back out to the villagers after a time. Dia bangs on the cellar door and tells Sigi what’s happened now. Corso produces the Sahnish red and drinks most of it himself. Antare seems to vanish and reappear at will.

Near midnight, Corso balls up the fourth draft of his letter to the Valiera and tosses it into the hearth. Sigi reaches across the table for what’s left of the Kyriak white. Eager joins them, at last, and bolts the door behind him.

“Sleep soundly, my friends,” the mentor says. “Murat’s light will guide her home.” He flows up the stairs, calm as anything. Antare is the first to follow. Sigi goes next.

Dia meets Corso’s eye. “You saw the body,” she says.

The pathfinder’s face is lit with firelight behind and candlelight before. It flickers across his skin, casting a twisting grimace across his still features. “There was no head,” he says. Slurs, but only barely. “She had not cut it off, mind you. It was gone. It was paste on the stone. My nephew found a tooth in the garden, just last week.”

Dia nods. She sits in silence for a time, watching the fire burn. “If you’re right, then she’ll be gone soon.”

He doesn’t respond. She rises, at last, and puts herself to bed, where she stares at the ceiling until a dozen shouting voices stir her at dawn.

She staggers down the stairs just in time to see Antare shoving his way past Corso and Eager, rushing out the door with his equipment under his arm. Outside, another small throng has gathered, milling about with wordless shrieks and cries. Antare shouts, disperses them just enough for Dia to see the hunter’s body, face down in the mud.

The smell of pig shit hits her then, stained with something acrid and sharp that burns in Dia’s lungs. The hunter’s face is tipped just enough that her nose is not submerged in muck, but her eyes are shut, and they don’t flutter when Antare turns her over. The medic’s eyes bulge, and he swears.

“Clear the table,” he shouts over the din. “Clear it, there’s no time to move her!”

Antare lifts the hunter’s body, draping her across his arms like a gruesome bride, and marches through the villagers in a straight line. It’s only when he passes through the door that Dia sees the gore and sinew dropping from the empty socket of the hunter’s right shoulder.

“Alchemist!” the mentor shouts. Sigi has already recovered Antare’s equipment. He arranges knives and cloth and bottles of bubbling fluid on the table beside the filthy, prone body.

Corso mumbles. “Just let her die. Just let her die. It would be a mercy.”

Eager grips him by the shoulders and shakes, once, before turning to Dia. “Take him away, girl. You don’t need to see this.”

Dia wants to protest that she’s seen any number of surgeries and dissections. Instead, she grabs Corso by the arm, decorum be damned, and pulls him toward the stairs.

[poorguysheadisdoingwhatnow]

Blink’s side pt. 1

Blink was always so careful.

When he was little, he was careful around his father’s anger and swinging fists. As he got older, he was careful around anyone he thought might be a threat, from other kids on the street to street vendors from whom he was swiping just enough food to survive.

Blink became a newsie after he ran away from home, and even though he trusted his friends as though they were family, he was still careful.

Blink was always careful. So how did he get caught?

He still didn’t know the answer even as he sat in Snyder’s office, a place he was all too familiar with from other times he wasn’t careful enough, watching the man scribble notes of his ‘criminal charges’ in a book.

“Trespassing, aiding and abetting, loitering...” Snyder set the pen down with a smile. “Quite the list there, Louis.”

“Don’t call me that,” Blink spat. “Ugly fucker like you don’t get to-”

Snyder had always moved faster than a man of his age probably should have been able to, and suddenly Blink was reeling from a hard smack to his face. After a few moments, he managed to get his bearings and sit upright again, but he could feel an uncomfortable warmth on his face. Though he couldn’t reach up and touch it with his hands cuffed behind his back, he knew he was bleeding. He had caught the sharp end of Snyder’s ring before.

“That’s a common problem with you newsboys, isn’t it? Showing respect to your elders,” Snyder said. “Even the new one. And his little rat of a brother.”

Blink knew Snyder was talking about Davey and Les, but he held his tongue despite how desperately he wanted to defend his new friends. The kids he hadn’t even talked to that much before the strike but felt he knew them well because of the stories Sarah would tell as they walked to the Refuge nearly every night-

Oh, no. Sarah might try to come alone (Blink had made Boots promise ages ago that he wouldn’t go anywhere near the Refuge again after he brought Katherine that one night), and something could happen, and if she got arrested, too, there was no telling what Snyder would do.

Maybe it was because of his startling realization and the panic that accompanied it, or maybe it was just because of his fiery temper and unwillingness to think things through, but suddenly Blink was talking again.

“Maybe we would show more respect if you earned it good and proper, ‘stead of beatin’ kids senseless just ‘cause you’re a spineless coward who takes his anger out on people smaller ‘an you ‘cause you know they can’t fight back-”

The fist to Blink’s face was unsurprising and certainly not appreciated, but Blink knew that he had dug his own grave the moment he decided to sneak back to the Refuge despite the fact the sun was coming up soon and he would no longer have the cover of night. So he kept talking through a newly-split lip.

“What, you just provin’ me right?”

Snyder’s next blow was the hardest; the man had evidently decided not to hold back anymore, or maybe Blink had managed to piss him off just enough to cloud his already shaky judgement.

Soon, Blink stopped talking. There was too much blood in his mouth.

Then Snyder grabbed his hair and slammed his head into the concrete floor, and Blink stopped thinking for a while, too.

---

Unconsciousness was bliss, free from pain and fear and the worry Blink had felt in the pit of his stomach since the rally, and it was over far too quickly for his liking.

He groaned and curled in on himself, realizing belatedly that he was now lying on a mattress, not the floor of Snyder’s office, and that his feet had brushed up against something that shifted when he touched it. The movement was accompanied by a voice, soft and practically dripping with concern.

“Blink?” It was Mush. Of course it was Mush. No one besides him and Crutchie could bring that sense of care into their voices, and Crutchie was...

“Mush.” Blink was startled at how hard it was to even say the one word, but he supposed it was because of the bruises he could feel forming on his throat from Snyder’s rough hands.

“You’re a dumbass,” Mush said. Even with the harsh words, the care still remained. “You got caught. I told’ja you couldn’t keep sneakin’ up here. They was bound to see you sooner or later-”

“Least it was later,” Blink joked.

“Yeah, whatever.” There was another shift, as though Mush was leaning closer. “Blink, can you open your eye for me? Your, uh, your patch is gone, and I don’t gotta see your bad eye even though I probably should ‘cause the place around it’s all swollen and such, but, uh, I gotta look at your good eye to see if it looks funny. Specs told me about concussions, but he’s sleepin’ now, and I don’t wanna wake ‘im. I think I can see if you got one, though.”

“You always talked too much, y’know that?” Blink grumbled, though the insult held no malice. Everyone knew that Mush’s tendency to ramble was just part of his charm. “My head’s poundin’ somethin’ wild. Just gimme a second.”

His eyelids felt unbelievably heavy, and Blink thought Mush could be onto something with what he said about Blink’s bad eye because he found he couldn’t open it at all, but finally Blink managed to force his good eye open just a little-

-and saw nothing.

“What the fuck,” he whispered. He closed his eye and reopened it, but everything was still as black as though he had never opened it at all, like all the light had been sucked from the room and they were all sitting in a void.

Except Blink was the only one in the dark.

He screamed.

---

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