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toriwakes · 4 years ago

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Chrysanthemums [Draco Malfoy x Potter!Reader]

summary: you’ve lived in america for the past 15 years of your life. then, everything changed with one letter.

content warnings: very light cursing. some angst (?)

a/n: omg hi!! officially my second request, im so excited to share!! i know it’s SUUUUPER long but bars with me? i’m so proud of it and i’d actually love to do a mini series w this so lmk what u all think! ty for the request @peneflop !

everyone in america knew about harry potter. even though voldemort was a criminal in another country, americans felt just as worried. when the news got out, everyone was all over you. ‘(y/n) potter! are you related to him?’ you didn’t know the answer. but it was most likely not, right?

you sat next to your best friends, wishing them a good morning. “want to go pick up the mail?” lena asked. you nodded. the three of you walked down the halls, giggling and gossiping. “what’re you doing for halloween, (y/n)?” gina asked. you shrugged. “dunno. probably nothing. why?” she let out a dramatic gasp. “you’ve gotta come to this party! please don’t miss it, it’s gonna be amazing!” you laughed at her and turned the corner, entering the mail room. “i’ll think about it.” she made a face and you all separated to open your mail boxes. you flipped through your letters- nothing special. then something caught your eye. a parchment envelope with a burgundy wax seal. “guys?” your two friends rushed over. “what?” the said in unison. with a shaky hand, you lifted up the letter. “holy.” “shit.”

it was settled. you were moving to london and going to hogwarts. you were not keen on the idea at all, but the albus dumbledore demanded you be there. no witch could just say no. right now you were at the station, watching as hundreds of witches and wizards staggered around. “why’d you have to go before halloween?” gina sighed. you pouted. “i’ll write to you both once a week. i’ll tell you everything.” “yeah, you better!” lena teased. then you were met with anna. anna was your care taker. she wasn’t related to you but she cared for you since you didn’t have any connections to your family. you were told that your parents died in a car crash and they were both only children, so you had no aunts or uncles. poor circumstances, but that was your life. “i’m gonna miss you.” you said it quickly, afraid you may cry if you spoke too slow. “i’ll miss you too.” she was already crying. “now go, everyones already on.” you hugged them and waved goodbye before boarding the train.

you didn’t know anyone here. you shuffled to the back of the train and tried not to make yourself stand out too much. you walked back as far as you could and found yourself in a dark section of the train with empty booths. you smiled and sat down, pulling out your book that you brought along. you were daydreaming of lena and gina when you heard footsteps. when you shifted your gaze to the doorway, you jaw almost dropped. a tall (yet skinny) pale boy stood there. he along with two beefy men didn’t pay any mind to you. you hoped they wouldn’t notice you, but you were the only one there, it was unlikely they wouldn’t. they actually all got situated and you thought you were in the clear- until someone else came in. “i saw the saint on the way in. almost puked.” a brunette girl in all black clothes joked. they all laughed. “how was everyone’s- oh?” she saw you. the three boys looked at you, eyebrows furrowed. “hello, i’ve never seen you.” she spoke softly and say in front of you. “yeah. i’m new, it’s nice to meet you.” you stuck out your hand for a handshake. “american? that’s cute. i’m pansy.” she took your hand and you smiled. “pansy, that’s a pretty name. like the flower?” she didn’t say anything. you cleared your throat awkwardly. “i’m (y/n).” she smiled as a response. “would you three stop being so rude? introduce yourselves!” she was referring to the three boys. the blonde one stood up first. “malfoy.” he said curtly. you gave him a friendly smile. he didn’t return it. “goyle. that’s crabbe. he doesn’t talk much.” crabbe gave you a smile that you gladly returned. “come sit with us.”

for the next hour or so you bonded with your three new friends. pansy did most of the talking, goyle occasionally dropping in. draco didn’t speak too much but you could tell he was listening. every time he did, however, your ears got hot and you felt warm. he was very cute, but you didn’t know him like that. “the trolly is passing. (y/n), if i gave you some galleons would you get us some snacks? anything is fine.” you nodded, but were mildly confused. what the fuck are galleons? “pansy, she’s american. she doesn’t know what galleons are.” draco said. “oh- that’s right. go with her then.” pansy suggested. you took the gold coins from pansy and stood, draco following you. “hello! anything from the trolly?” the kind old woman asked. you picked out the thinks that look the nicest, draco talking the coins from your hand and giving them to the woman. you ignored the race in your heart when his hand touched yours. “did you get that?” he asked. you nodded. “you don’t speak too much, do you.” it wasn’t really a question. as you were about to answer, you made eye contact with a boy with very round glasses. could it be harry? draco noticed this and ushered you forward. “don’t talk to him.” just wait till they found out about your last name...

the students piled into the great hall, which was huge and rather beautiful. gather headmaster, who you recognized as professor dumbledore rose and spoke a few words. then, he made eye contact with you. “let the sorting ceremony begin!” you shuffled in with all the first years feeling awkward. the upper class man gave you strange looks- they must’ve thought you were daft. finally, you heard your name. “(y/n) potter?” you heard gasps in every direction. you stepped forward and sat on the stool. then, you felt the hat on your head. your hands were sweating.“another potter, eh? same qualities as the first yes... but where to put you?” everyone seemed to be on the edge of their seats. the 7 minutes that had passed felt like 10 hours. then, you heard a small voice in your head. this voice wasn’t yours. “what’ll it be then? gryffinor or slytherin?’ you blinked. ‘just put me where you think i’ll exceed.’ you don’t know how, but you felt the sorting hat smirk. “SLYTHERIN!” the hat boomed. a mixture of gasps and cheers erupted. the witch who sorted you pointed to the direction of the house decorated in green and silver- you beamed when you saw pansy. you sat next to her and she embraced you into a hug. “bloody hell, you didn’t tell me you were a potter! you don’t remember anything from that night, do you?” draco didn’t say anything. “what do you mean?” you asked. now they all just looked at you weird. “do you actually not know what happened?” draco asked. you shook your head. “(y/n)...almost a decade ago, voldemort killed your parents. you and harry survived, you’re the only two that have ever lived after getting hit with the killing curse.” hearing all of this was almost too much to handle. so you did have a family? it wasn’t a car crash? your brother is the chosen one? “how? how did no one know?” pansy looked at you with pity. “you two were separated as infants. no one knew what you looked like. besides, for some reason you don’t have the scar like he does.” pansy said while moving your hair out of your face. scar? like the one on your chest? you didn’t mention it, but you wondered if that was what she meant. “we’ll treat you all the same. don’t you fret.” pansy smiled. “thank merlin she’s not a gryffindor though.” goyle commented. everyone laughed. “what’s wrong with the gryffindors?” draco eyed the table behind you. “they’re a bunch of snobs. think they’re so much better than everyone because they’ve got potter on their side, well guess what? now so do we.” you hummed and turned around. harry was gazing at you already.

that night you found a tie, a sweater, some slytherin robes and a little slytherin flag in your dorm. if harry was a gryffinor, shouldn’t you also be? you shook your head from the thought- you’re done second guessing yourself. to take your mind off it, you pulled out your stationary and began to write to your best friends back in america. boy did you have some things to share...

officially 3 weeeks till halloween. your friends were sending you letter about how excited they were, but you were bummed. you didn’t tell them that your parents died on halloween, you knew it would kill the fun for them. you smiled at the letter and the cute picture of them attached. you pinned it to the cork board- right next to the slytherin flag. you smiled to yourself and grabbed your school bag, existing the dorms and heading into the common rooms. your friends seemed to be waiting for you. “finally! i’m starved, let’s go.” pansy linked arms with you and led you out, hiding you to the great hall. the stares you used to revive everywhere faded. it was like you were always there. “what classes do you all have today?” you questioned, biting into your bagel. “astronomy, potions, transfiguration and defense. you?” draco asked. you and draco finally became formal friends. you owed it all to the many classes you shared together and pansy’s constant pestering. “the same. i just gave potions first.” everyone dove into conversation about their school schedule, followed by how much they hated it. you laughed every now and then but your mind was somewhere else. you had harry in a few classes today. you and him haven’t talked at hall, surprisingly. you were simply too intimidated to do so. “(y/n)!” goyle was calling you. “yeah?” “i said we better get going. if your first class is potions, you don’t want to be late.” you simply nodded and headed with your group to your classes. everyone broke off to their classes as you walked around the castle, but you noticed that draco stuck with you. “i thought you had astronomy?” you only asked once he was outside your classroom. “i do.” “then why are you here?” you never really noticed how much taller draco was than you. “i just wanted to make sure you got here safe. if that not what friends do?” you cocked a brow. “you never walk me to my classes. “bloody hell, im sorry i won’t do it again!” he said quickly. you chuckled. “that’s more like it.” at that, you entered class and he walked away. there was something about him...

“pay attention mrs.granger.” you felt like rolling your eyes at your professor. he was always finding a reason to kick on the gryffindors. however when snape saw nearly everyone was struggling, he huffed and raised his hands to gain the class’s attention. “alright. split into groups of two and finish the potion. do not pair with someone from your house.” everyone shuffled around- harry was looking at you. you acted first, picking up your books and moving to harry’s desk. “hi.” you said. “hello.” he responded. you two worked silently but used teamwork. you ready him instructions while he acted out. “wow, we’re doing way better than i thought we would’ve.” you gave him a curious look. “not that i didn’t think you’d do good, i meant-“ you cut him off by laughing. “you really are my brother aren’t you?” he went quiet. “about that.” you moved your head up to look at him. “i guess we should talk about it.” he nodded in agreement. snape approached your table. “since you two like to do a lot of chatting, we’ll test your potion. snape stuck a dropper in the potion and poured it onto a round item covered in warts. slowly but surely, the warts popped away. “perhaps you’re not as incompetent as i thought.” was all he said before leaving the cauldron and dismissing you both.

you and harry spent the rest of potions and a bit of lunch sitting outside, talking about life and everything you missed out on. “so when you were thirteen- you blew up our aunt?” harry laughed harder at the memory. “harry! there you are.” hermione and ron showed up behind him. “oh- hey guys. wanna sit?” hermione gave you an uncomfortable look. “i’d love to, but i need to speak to you alone harry.” just in cue, you heard your best friends voice. “(y/n)!” you turned around and saw pansy as well as draco. “it’s fine, i have to go anyway. see you later.” you hugged your brother and you both split off. “finally talked to him?” pansy questioned. “yeah. it felt good.” she smiled as a response and the three of you settled on hanging out near the lank for the remainder of lunch. you didn’t catch it, but draco smiled at your happiness.

one week till halloween. you were more upset than happy, but harry wasn’t too effected, but he’s known the truth for 4 years. you found out last month. since it was a weekend, the hogwarts students were roaming about, chatting about their plans for the big night. your friends apologized to you, explaining that they all had detention early morning with mcgonagall. well- all but one. draco walked up to you in the common room and sat beside you. over the past month you and draco became even closer than before. you found yourself having a lot of alone time with him, learning new things about the boy every time. the more you learned a the more interested you became, and before you knew it; you were slowly falling for draco malfoy.

“hey.” you chimed. “do you want to go for a walk?” he said after a minute of silence. you noticed he wasn’t making eye contact with you. you set down your book slowly. finally he looked at you, curious why you were taking so long to answer. “are you bloody deaf? i asked if you wanted to go for a walk.” you giggled while nodding. “yes-yes, i just love hearing how sassy you get. cmon.” you left first and you could hear draco mumbling something along the lines of ‘i’m not sassy...’ under his breath. you thought he was adorable.

the two of you ended up at the lake. it became a usual hangout spot for you and your friends. you did things like talk the day away, finish homework and especially practice magic here. there was a small patch of flowers in the grass- that’s how you identified your spot. as you and draco relaxed you flicked your wand, a flower now blooming in your hand. “..you love that spell.” he said, interrupting his last sentence. you looked at him, moving your body so that you were facing him. “guess i do.” you hummed softly, leaning forward to tuck the chrysanthemum behind his ear. he looked at you like you had three heads- was he not used to kind gestures? “that looks nice next to your hair.” you commented. his confused gaze stuck. you ignored it and continued swishing your wand, anxious that you may have done something wrong. just then, draco let out a sigh. “goddamnit.” he sounded defeated. “what’s wrong?” you asked. he finally looked at you normally, but this time he looked sad. “you. this is all your fault, you know that? i’m supposed to be this cold hearted, asshole type of guy. i wasn’t going to let myself get soft for some girl, especially an american.” you had no idea where he was going with this. the more he spoke, the more nervous you got. is he saying he doesn’t want to be friends? “but you’re so kind, and smart. you care so much about your friends and those you love. how could i not like you? and you being gorgeous is just a bonus...” you could not believe what you were hearing. was he admitting to having feelings for you? the silence scared him, so you spoke up. “are you saying what i think you’re saying?” he winced. “bloody hell, i’m saying i like you, you dimwit!” so you were right. “well..i like you too, draco?” he widened his eyes and tilted his head as if to say, ‘really?’ “yes, you dimwit.” you mocked. he chuckled and pulled out his wand. “hold out your hands and close your eyes.” you did as he asked, feeling something sprout in your palms. “open.” when you did, what appeared to be a flower crown (made up from chrysanthemums) rested in your hands. you gasped from joy, lifting it up so you could get a better look at it. “i love it.” you spoke. “(y/n)...would you ever consider being my girlfriend?” you felt time stop. draco really wanted you to be his girlfriend. “yes!” you said happily. he beamed back at you, looked at the flower-clad ground and smiling even brighter. “cool.” he chuckled. “cool.” you responded.

a few days later when you finally got the chance, you ran to your dorm to write to lena and gina. they were gonna flip! just as you planted the wax seal, you heard screaming coming from outside your door. there was pansy, bursting in and hugging you. “you’re dating draco?! oh my god!” she squealed. you laughed at the excitement. “yes! it’s amazing isn’t it?” you said. “yes! oh i’m so excited, my two best friends- dating!!!” pansy smiled greatly. “i’m going to the owlery, would you-“ “DRACO! take your girlfriend to the owlery!” you shook your head at pansy, bidding her goodbye and leaving with draco.

“who are you sending this to?” draco questioned as you attached the letter to the owls leg. “my friends back in america.” you stared as the owl flew away, farther and father, until it was out of sight. suddenly you felt a hand wrap around your waist- draco was looking at you with heart eyes. “what?” you laughed. “you’re just...really gorgeous.” you blushed hard. you didn’t even notice that you were staring at draco’s lips- and he was staring back. you both leaned in closer and one of his plate hands cupped your cheek. “can i kiss you?” he whispered so quietly you weren’t even sure you heard it. still, you nodded and he closed the gap. his lips were as soft as clouds, fitting like a missing puzzle piece with yours. you could’ve stayed like that forever; just you and him. but all good things must come to an end, right? “(y/n)?” the voice of your brother alarmed you, making you break away from draco. “potter.” draco spat. “get away from her!” harry ran to pull you away from him, standing in front of you as if draco was going to hurt you. “harry what are you doing?” you whined, moving him out of the way so now you were in between the boys. the way the two boys looked at each other- you knew there was some history you haven’t discovered. “protecting you? you don’t know what he could’ve brought you up here for!” draco looked at you; he was extremely annoyed. “harry, draco’s my boyfriend. i’m fine..” harry’s mouth hung open, eyes flickering from you to draco and back again. “potter, is there a problem?” draco asked in his usual sassy voice. “let’s see; you’re dating my sister, why would we have a problem malfoy?” shit.

harry stormed away out of rage. the walk back to the common rooms was silent. your head was too full to talk. you had just reconnected with harry, were you going to ruin it all just by being with draco? you really likes the blonde, but was he worth ruining your new founded family? “what are you thinking about?” he spoke finally. you snapped out of your gaze, shaking your head. “nothing.” “no, i know you’re thinking. you get all quiet when you think.” he knew you well, which made you feel a little better. “i think harry’s mad at me. i just met him and he already hates me.” draco cupped your cheeks, making you look at him. “listen to me- he does not hate you. you’re his sister, his only family. he couldn’t hate you.” you smiled in his hands. you told him you’d meet him back in the common room later. you had to find harry.

you walked around the castle for what felt like an hour, finally finding him in an empty classroom on the third floor. you entered silently. he was sitting on a desk with his back facing you. “hi.” you choked out. harry turned around and said nothing when he saw you. you took it upon yourself to sit next to him. “harry-“ “do you like him? like, actually like him?” you thought about it for a moment. you considered lying, maybe that’ll make him hate you less. but you knew he’d eventually find out and it’s only make things worse. “yeah. i do.” harry put his face in his hands. “not only are you a slytherin but you’re dating my sworn enemy.” he shook his head and laughed while saying it. “hey!” you said while playfully shoving him. the laughter died and you sat in sad silence again. “i don’t me being with draco to mess up our relationship.” harry but his lip in thought. “is there anything i could do to make it up to you?” you pleaded. an idea popped into your head. you pulled out your wand and swished it- a flower wreath following. “chrysanthemums?” harry asked, taking the wreath into his hands. you smiled. “yeah.” he put the wreath on his head as a joke, but it brushed some of his hair out of his forehead on the way. “i meant to ask you about the scar.” “what about it?” he said. you moves your shirt down, exposing the lightning bolt scar on your chest. “blimey.” he looked very shocked. “i don’t really know what this means.” you whispered. harry shook his head, implying he didn’t either. “are we alright then?” harry fidgeted with the wreath. it dawned upon him that no- he couldn’t stay mad at you. you’re the only family he has left. “i guess.”

over the next week you magras to patch things up with harry and draco well enough to celebrate halloween in peace. the feast was ravishing. you ate so many sweets that you couldn’t imagine having back in america. as per usual you sat with the slytherins- but something was telling you u that you should be with harry. so without a second though you turned to draco, “what do you think of eating with harry?” he almost spit out his pumpkin juice. “you brother hates me (y/n), you know that.” he knew you were going to get your way, but he was trying to convince you not to. your mind was made up. “he’ll have to deal with it.” let’s just say gryffindor wasn’t too fond of having slytherins at their table.

being draco’s girlfriend was a blessing. he showered you with gifts, affection, appreciation. you couldn’t ask for a better boyfriend. there was never a time where you doubted his feelings for you. now was one of them. you two were in his dorm, listening to the soft, low music coming from his record player. you were both just gazing at the ceiling while wrapped in each other’s arms. it’s not that you didn’t love lazy days with draco- you certainly did. you just really wanted to do something right now. “draco?” you finally said. “hmm?” you loved when he responded with a hum. you couldn’t explain why, but it made you go all fuzzy inside. “i wanna do something fun,” you flipped over so you were hovering above him now. he scrunched his brows. “like what?” you thought about it. what could two, 15 year olds do at one in the morning? “wanna sneak into the kitchens?” he burst out in laughter. you wanted to ask him what was so funny, but with a smile like that? you had to laugh with him. “alright- alright. let’s go.” so that’s how you two ended up there, pajamas and all. everything would’ve gone fine if draco would’ve just worn shoes. “bloody hell!” he screamed, dropping all the snacks. draco stubbed his toe on a nearby cart, and of course he had to be dramatic about it. “draco hush!-“ but it was too late. the lights turned on and the house elves caught you, immediately reporting to filch.

you never wished draco wasn’t such a diva more than right now. your saturday was being stolen by detention. even though you were with him, the detention was being watched by snape and you weren’t risking it again. you checked the clock; still two hours? god, you were gonna be here forever if something didn’t happen- “professor!” it was dolores umbridge, dressed in all pink, stumbling through the door. “yes, professor?” snape sneered. she straightened herself up and spoke in her high voice, “there are difficulties with some gryffindor student i could use some assistance with.” she said. “is there anyone else you can ask? i’m preoccupied at the moment..” she giggled. “yes, but i’m sure these students will listen to you.” umbridge looked at you and draco, obviously noticing the green color on your robes. “besides. i’m sure they’ve learned their lesson- haven’t you, children?” you both nodded frantically. “you’re dismissed.” you and draco shot up, not asking any questions and only daring to speak once they were both out of ear shot. “you’re an idiot, you know that?” you told him, playfully (but not really) shoving him to the side. he took your hand and put it in his, smirking to himself more than at you. “‘m your idiot.” rolled your eyes at the blonde. he really was.

before you knew it, the school year was passing by. you and harry were going to america along with some other friends to visit your home. ron was a nervous reck on the plane, not understanding why muggles put themselves through this torture. finally the four of you landed, slowly but surely making it through security and such. that’s when you spotted your two best friends- from miles away, at that. you ran towards them at full speed, almost toppling then over when you embraced them. “i missed you so much!” lena shouted. “i missed you too! god i have so many stories- oh! i need to introduce you to some people!” you face palmed, completely forgetting about your guests. “this-“ you grabbed harry’s arm and shoved him in front of you. “-is harry.” your friends gave you the exact same look; ‘is he..?’ you nodded. “erm- pleasure to meet you. i’m her brother.” both their eyes went wide, and they both hopped on him. “anna is going to go crazy! two potters- wow! she’s already had enough with toria let me tell you-“ “gina!” you scolded. she just laughed. “ah yes, this is ron, he hated me when i first met him.” ron threw his arms up. “you’re a slytherin, what’d you expect?” you hit him in the head as a response. you also ignored how lena ogled ron. then, you felt your boyfriends long arm snake around your waste and press a chaste kiss to your head. “it’s not as bad as i thought it’d be here.” he commented. “and this my dear friends; is draco. my boyfriend.” draco smiled kindly and held out his hand. they both shook it. harry rolled his eyes in annoyance. then you saw her. “anna!” you’ve done a lot of screaming today, you noticed. harry showed up behind you, tapping you on the shoulder. “who’s that?”

harry almost cried when he found out he had a guardian. he had told you about sirius, but he sadly passed away. it’s like he was getting a second chance. anna took you all home in her van (ron getting even more nervous now). right now, all of you sat in anna’s back yard. “did you learn anything cool over there? new spells?” gina inquired. you smirked, pulling out your wand and preforming the spell you’ve mastered this school year.

“chrysanthemums?”

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leah-halliwell92 · 5 years ago

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Too Much Love Can Kill You

Summary: Soul marks are found through touch and song, one must sing to find their half and touch completes their connection. To reject your mark is to sentence them to death. You have been on tour with Brian, Roger and Rufus for a year and have known them for nearly four. What happens you find out along the way that you are the mark of one Brian May?

(Special thanks to @glamrockmonarch for the help with this! Writer’s Block has been making me it’s bitch for a bit when it comes to this fic and for that im soooooo sorry)

Prologue – Chapter 1– Chapter 2 – Chapter 3 — Chapter 4 – Chapter 5 –Chapter 6 – Chapter 7 – Chapter 8 – Chapter 9 – Chapter 10 – Chapter 11 – Chapter 12 – Chapter 13 – Chapter 14 – Chapter 15 – Chapter 16 – Chapter 17

“Sure,” you said with a small smile before turning to Brian, “I’ll be there as soon as I can…promise.”

Brian nodded and made his way to the main lobby followed by Sarina who was pushing Roger in the same direction and the boys who corralled your father and led him out.

You nodded to the lounge and focused on keeping your breathing even as you both made your way to a corner booth away from prying eyes. You hoped this would reconnect you with your best friend…you also hoped he wasn’t there to woo you away from Brian. Or attempt to anyway.

//00//00//

Chapter 18

“So...” Jake said with a smile as the waiter placed your drinks in front of you.

Jake went for a beer and you opted for water. Alcohol is not a good thing in these types of circumstances.

You gave him an awkward grin, “So...How are you?”

He gave an easy nod before answering, “Good, I’ve been taking some night classes at the college across town. Don’t know what I’m striving for career wise yet but I figured some form of an extended education is better than nothing.”

You gave him a soft grin recognizing your best friend from so many years ago in that statement.

“Not graphics?” You asked curiously.

Before all went to hell with him and his father, Jake had wanted/yearned to go into graphic design and all it brought along with it.

His smile fell at the mention of his once passion, “Na, pops wants me to go into medicine. Said he has a thing lined up for me to be a tech at a clinic since he saw I’m back in school.”

You wanted to roll your eyes at that. Jake was never one for science biologically speaking or otherwise.

“Enough about me though,” he said waving a dismissive hand, “What have you been up to aside from being a rockstar?”

He gave you a kinds grin.

You tell him how you went to school and was taking one out of Brian’s book and waiting a bit before going for your PhD. You went into how your musical career took off and how you landed in the sights and hands of Queen let alone Adam Lambert.

Your demeanor changed when you spoke of the Taylors, Brian and his kids. The soft smile as your focus goes to Brian. You were so enthralled in what you were saying you didn’t even notice the dark look that fell on Jake’s features.

Adam, who’d taken Brian, Rufus and your father to a secluded corner of the cafe, was watching the event unfold. He was there not only as moral support but back up and to keep the family from jumping the gun. This included holding your dad back from defending the man he wants to marry you to.

“So...” Jake said voice darker then when he greeted you.

This got your attention. You kept your cool and waited to see how this would play out while at the same time looking for an exit from the situation.

“Your dad called me to meet you here,” he said suggestively.

“He’s going to do something,” Rufus said his gaze glued on Jake.

“Don't be ridiculous,” your father said with a scoff.

“Watch it,” Brian said voice cold, “You’ve no room to talk when you’re still so certain (Y/N) wouldn’t have died if she married that boy.

Adam nodded at this in silence gaze still on the couple a couple of tables down.

“I get that,” You say voice even despite your weariness for where this conversation is leading.

“I guess what I’m trying to say is that I want us to try again (Y/N),” Jake said in a what he thought to be an inviting voice.

“We never dated Jake,” You said voice hard, “I wanted to go out with you but you said no because you couldn't have a...what had you said? Oh yea, a girl who had an unrealistic look on life.”

“Well I didn’t mean it,” he said in a disgruntled voice, “You should have known I didn’t mean it.”

“I should have?” You scoffed, “I didn’t know you anymore Jake...you’d changed and were changing into a person did not recognize. That was crowned when you saw me kissing Laurie Coffax behind the bleachers!”

“You weren’t supposed to be kissing nobody! Let alone another woman,” he practically growled at you, “I couldn’t have who would be my woman whoring herself out.”

“Whoring myself!?” You said incredulously, “If anyone was a whore it was you. Or don’t you remember them?”

“Oh come on��”

“No lets go,” you say getting ready to defend yourself, “Jenny, Sarah, Anna, Belle, Macy, and lets not forget Belle and Macy’s respective sisters. So you tell me who was the whore.”

“Listen here (Y/N) I’m willing to overlook your indiscretion,” Jake said trying to gain control of the conversation.

“No,” You say voice hard as you stand ready to leave, “We’re done here.”

“(Y/N) please! We need to get married,” Jake said stepping in front of you to keep you from leaving.

“I don’t need to do anything with you let alone marry you,” you say voice hard, “I found my mark Jake. If there’s anyone I’m going to marry and make babies with it will be him.”

“Your father said–”

“Our fathers made that deal without my knowledge,” you say voice hard, “That you knew and didn’t tell me means you were never my friend.”

“I was promised your hand in exchange for you getting an education,” he said reaching for you, “I think that’s a fair trade.”

“My freedom is nonnegotiable Jacob,” you said sadly, “My dad wanted to chain me here so much so he sold me to you like cattle. I’m only here for one more night Jacob, I’m leaving afterwards. I don't think there’s fixing anything with my dad for what he’s done.”

Your father gasped at this proclamation.

“He’s your dad (Y/N),” Jake said voice hard, “And I don’t care what you want.”

He grabbed your wrist and pulled you closer to his body. His hold on your wrist is painful and you’re sure he’ll break it if he keeps going.

“Is there a problem?” Adam said voice hard.

Jake looked at Adam and realized he was surrounded.

You looked behind you and breathed a sigh of relief at seeing Brian there.

Things are gonna get out of hand if Jake didn’t get lost.

Tag List: @pansexualqueendarling, @queenattheopera, @brianandthemays, @theborhapboysawakenedmywhatever, @ramibaby, @captain--americanna, @awkwardangelshezza, @avengerraven1023, @danamaleksworld, @pastywhiteperson, , @i-was-born-like-this, @redspecialstardust, @reedusteinrambles, @readinghorn, @subbysharkbabe, @capan-devereaux, @bowieandqueen11, @bellamy1998, @reedusteinrambles, @simply-sams-things, @plutoneu, @bleu-jean-baby, @brian-mayonnaise, @0hour9am, @toomuchtellyneck, @kimanne723, @kyleetheeditor, @glamrockmonarch, @rawyld, @queensdivas, @crazylittlethingcalledobsession, @rogertaylorsfalsettogivesmehives, @phoenixqueen07, @ohmybribri, @jennyggggrrr, @jd-johndeacon-or-jackdaniels, @painkiller80, @drivenbybri, @whiskeyandroses31, @hodgepodge-of-rog, @briyourmotherdown, @yourlocalmusicalprostitute

#brian may #roger taylor #sarina taylor #adam lambert #rufus taylor #brian may x reader #roger taylor x sarina taylor #2019!roger taylor #2019!brian may #2019!brian may x reader #brian may imagine #present day brian may x reader #present day brian may #present day roger taylor #brian may fic #queen fic #queen band fic #soulmate fic #too much love can kill you

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itsthwippingtime · 5 years ago

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so on Thanksgiving i saw Frozen 2 and it was AMAZING and I've only just now had the time and energy to finish my thoughts on the movie and share it with y'all so here it is. Disclaimer: Sorry for how long it is

!!!!! MAJOR FROZEN 2 SPOILERS AHEAD !!!!!!!!!

first, baby anna and elsa???? I’m dead

thjkhsdhjk the story they came up with is literally how every child played with barbie dolls and doll houses

(children are so dramatic also why did we all have the same childhood)

oooh mystery about the past

their dad is so dramatic now i know where Anna and Elsa get it from

four spirits: Earth Wind Air Water how original

(everything changed when the fire nation attacked)

(okay but while their dad was telling the story about the northedral (???) i was totaling believing this is where Elsa got her powers from)

THEIR DAD WAS SAVED BY THE VOICE

(but Elsa was born with powers so her mom is totally magical)

where the nORTH WIND MEEEEETS THE SEEEAAAAA

i love their mom omg i love this song also

(okay but at this point i was like??? did their mom save their dad)

ELSA IN PURPLE I LOVE HER

Elsa being startled and sticking herself to the railing with ice is comedic gold

ANNA’S HAIR I LOVE IT

why is Olaf’s never-ending existential crisis the most relatable thing in this movie

also i love this song about things never changing

hi the line about a stone wall never falling??? FORESHADOWING

KRISTOFF LOVES HER I LOVE HIM HE IS SO PURE

HE HAS A RING

Elsa singing about being afraid of change but seizing the day?? CHARACTER GROWTH

Arendelle flag will always fly??? FORESHADOWING

family game night??? i fucking love it

Olaf shouldn’t be allowed to play charades that way Anna is right

but Olaf imitating Elsa??? iconic

Elsa playing charades is me playing charades

THE VOICE

TELL ANNA ELSA

oooh Kristof honey don’t,, don’t do it like that,,, honey

if Elsa is comforted by their mom’s scarf where was their mom’s scarf in the first movie??

Anna singing Elsa to sleep????? so pure

THE VOICE (AGAIN!)

INTO THE UNKNOOOOOWWWWWWWN

i love this song

‘Everyone I’ve ever loved is here within these walls’ so she loves Kristof???? good me too

where does Kristof sleep?

THE SPIRITS!!! HER ICE IS SHOWING HER THE SPIRITS RIGHT????

oh its the part with the ice suspended in air from the trailer

EARTH AIR FIRE AND WATER

so um the fire went out and its windy and they’re going to the cliffs???? okay???

ummm Elsa did you awake the spirits on purpose??? did you know what you were doing?? you never said it was an accident????

Elsa you cant go alone you’re team has to go with you or else its not much of a movie now is it Elsa. don’t be selfish share some screen time

i just love their outfits so much i want to be a princess in Norway please and thanks

Olaf and his fun facts are literally me

ELSA’S ICE CASTLE THERE SHE IS i wonder if they ever go there. is it a vacation home

water has memory FORESHADOWING

‘Elsa and Olaf are asleep,,, whatcha wanna do?’ UM WHAT

’Sven, keep us steady’ UMMMMM WHAT

THIS IS A PG MOVIE I WAS VERY UNCOMFORTABLE NEXT TO MY TEN YEAR OLD COUSIN THANKS DISNEY

oh Kristof honey

oh no Anna he didnt mean it like that

Kristof stop just stop

ooooh the voice is back

‘Kristof stop’ ‘Good idea’ I’m dead

i don’t really remember what happens in between them stopping and them finding the mist if anything but THE MIST

oooh they’re locked in. nice

okay so wind. thats fun.

the wind spirit is v smart because she knows which one is Elsa

her name is Gale and i love her

hello water has memory

their father being saved by a young girl??? it’s their mom

okay so the northuldra (i googled it) begin to attack? or advance at least

ARENDELLE GUARDS

okay but lieutenant whats his name can get it

they’re frenemies

Olaf’s recap of the first Frozen is comedic gold i want him and Luis from Ant-Man to get together

i don’t really remember what happens at this part but: Elsa and Anna learn that their mom saved their dad (CALLED IT), their mom is northuldra (KINDA CALLED IT) and everyones been trapped in the mist since their grandfather was killed

(which that story is fishy but i don’t think king Elsa & Anna’s dad would lie so????)

OH WAIT FIRE SPIRIT HAPPENED BEFORE ELSA AND ANNA LEARNED ABOUT THEIR MOM

AND OLAF’S SONG OMG

samantha?

(that part was so simple yet so funny omfg)

olaf: “this will all make sense when i am older” all the adults in the room: :/

also notice how Elsa is mindful enough to keep the fire spirit away from the northuldra’s homes??? like i love her???

I LOVE HIM i think his name is Brunie but i don’t know how the people at the Disney Store came to that conclusion

oh also Kristof and Sven run in to save the reindeer but Anna is only worried about Elsa??? idk maybe she knows Kristof can take care of himself and knows that Kristof knows when it becomes too dangerous but Elsa is going to try to stop the threat until she physically can’t and at that point it may be too late okay i get it

(okay but if they’ve been trapped and nothing can get in or out what do they eat??? like theres a lot more northuldra than arendelle guards so do they have designated areas they’re allowed to go in?? what do they do with the people who died?? probably bury them)

(also some if them are born in there and they’ve been in for decades so a generation maybe the beginning of the next one but how many of them are related????)

Kristof has a new friend and I’m so glad they’re not fighting over Anna

(take that toxic masculinity)

HES GONNA HELP HIM PROPOSE I LOVE IT

Reindeers are better than people (cont’d.)

the following are my favorite parts/lines from Lost In The Woods

that guitar riff (?) at the very beginning? sexy

“you had to go and of course its always fine”

because Kristof loves Anna and knows that Anna loves him and they can do different things and still be in love and he doesn’t have to constantly be over her and controlling what she does

(take that toxic masculinity part TWO)

OKAY BUT Kristof saying its fine while simultaneously worrying that he’s losing Anna is absolutely breaking my heart

NORTH IS SOUTH RIGHT IS LEFT WHEN YOU’RE GONE

Kristof: “and i don’t know what path you are on” me: :((((

I NEVER THOUGHT IT WAS A QUESTION OF WHETHER

WHO AM I???? IF IM NOT YOUR GUUUYYY?????

WHERE AM I???? IF WE’RE NOT TOGETHEEEERRRRRRR??????? FOREEEEVVVVVEEEEEERRRRRR

NOW I KNOW YOU’RE MY TRUE NORTH CAUSE I AM LOST IN THE WOODS

UP IS DOWN DAY IS NIGHT WHEN YOU’RE NOT THERE

YOU’RE MY ONLY LANDMARK SO IM LOST IN THE WOODS

WONDERING IF YOU STILL CARE

BUT ILL WAIT FOR A SIGN

(FOR A SIGN)

(peep the Queen reference)

THAT I’M YOUR PATH CAUSE YOU ARE MIN

UNTIL THEN IM LOST IN THE WOODS

this concludes my favorite parts/lines from Lost In The Woods

every time i type Lost In The Woods I wanna type Lost Into The Woods

okay SO

Olaf doing the siren call with Elsa is comedic gold

THEIR PARENTS SHIP OH MY GOD

peep Olaf with that gruesome “maybe there was nobody on board” when they asked how the ship was able to get through the mist

peep Olaf with the “why didn’t they just make the whole ship waterproof”

THEY WERE GOING TO FIND WHERE THE NORTH WIND MEETS THE SEA THE RIVER FILLED WITH MEMORIES

THEY WERE GOING FOR ELSA

WATER HAS MEMORY BITCH

ELSA BBY ITS NOT YOUR FAULT

LISTEN TO ANNA YOU ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR THEIR CHOICES

so they go to the river

(low-key thought that was their goal the whole time but its fine)

ELSA!!! ANNA AND OLAF HAVE TO GO WITH YOU WHAT ARE YOU DOING

if Disney doesn’t make the ice-canoe part of the Frozen Ride in Epcot in some way shape or form i will be deeply disappointed

uh oh rock giants

oh waterfall

cave

thats fun

ah Olaf always the optimist

(but where did Anna get flint?)

Anna’s hair??? i love it

oooh Elsa on the beach

she can’t get her shoes or coat wet i understand

PONYTAIL?????

GO BITCH

YAAASSS QUEEN USE THOSE ICE POWERS

oh shit that water horse is trying to drown her

what the fuck he’s actually trying to drown her

AH SHIT ITS ELSA’S WATER HORSE NOW

YAAASSSS BITCH

sdahjhdskjhdsjk

ITS A GLACIER BECAUSE WHY FUCKING NOT

every inch of me is trembling

SHOOWW YOURSELLLF

ELSA HAS A DUET WIHT HER MOMN

IM FINE

ELSASN IS TBHE FIFHT SPRIT

THE BRIDGE

ELSA’S NEW OUTFIT AND HER HAIR I WANT

WATER HAS MEMORY

Elsa destroyed Han’s memory I’m dead

OH SHIT KING RICHARD (Elsa & Anna’s grandfather, i don’t remember his name)

KING RICHARD IS AFRAID YAASSS QUEEN TELL HIM ELSA

WAIT ELSA

GO TO FAR AND YOULL BE DROWNED

ELSA WAIT

oh shit she jumped

OH SHIT SHES COLD BUT THE COLD NEVER BOTHERED HER ANYWAY

OH SHIT KING RICHARD KILLING THAT GUY FOR NO REASON

OH SHIT ELSA’S FROZEN

BUT SHE SHOT OUT ONE LAST ICE THINGY

we now return to this episode of Olaf and Anna Alone In A Dimly Lit Area With A Little Bit Of Fire

YAASSS ANNA GOT THE MESSAGE

BREAK THE DAMN

but Arendelle

OLAF

why isn’t that when Olaf and Anna are alone one of them is always dying

now i understand the no context memes featuring spider-man from Infinity War

okay so you’re telling me that Anna learned that her sister is frozen (pun intended) and Olaf dies in her arm and she still finds the energy to save Arendelle/the forest???

GO ANNA YOU GO GIRL ITS GONNA BE ALRIGHT

DISNEY CAN’T KILL ELSA AND OLAF THEY’D LOOSE TOO MUCH MONEY

oh shit the rock giants

KRISTOF TO THE RESCUE

AND SVEN OF COURSE

WHAT DO YOU NEED I LOVE HIM

THEY BROKE THE DAMN

OH NO ANNA DONT FALL

ANNA GET OUT OF THERE

LIEUTENANT WHATS HIS NAME AND KRISTOF SAVE ANNA TOGETHERDSKJAD

ELSA AND THE WATER HROSE THEY SAVE ARENDELLE SYDJHASDJKFHSDA

the Arendelle citizens literally are so hilarious to me all they know is: the spirits are mad and all the heirs to their thrones went on a dangerous journey to save their kingdom, with no guards to protect them, then a tidal wave comes rushing towards their homes and suddenly their Queen who has always been quiet, modest, and reserved comes riding in on a fucking water horse in a boss ass outfit with her hair down and saves the kingdom. like???? imagine being on that cliff??? and all they do is clap???? I’m so dead

poor Anna :((( but Kristof is doing his best to comfort him like i love him

ELSA GO TO HER ANNA GO

THEY’RE CRYING CAUSE THEYRE SO HAPPY KJDASDHSJKHFJKSAD

ARENDELLE IS SAVED ANNA ITS OKAY

OLAF IS SAVED ANNA ITS OKAY

KRISTOF PROPOSED IN THE DORKIEST WAY BUT ANNA’S REACTION WAS THE CUTEST I LOVE IT

(WATER HAS MEMORY)

ELSA STAYS AND ANNA IS QUEEN

CUT TO ANNA’S CORONATION AND THE NEW STATUE AND THE ENCHANTED FOREST IS ICE NOW AND ELSA HAS A WATER/ICE HORSE AND GALE HELPS ANNA AND ELSA COMMUNICATE AND THE ROCK GIANTS ARE NICE AND BRUNIE IS STILL THE CUTEST AND ANNA AND ELSA STILL HAVE FAMILY GAME NIGHT

(okay but did anyone else find it odd that Elsa didn’t go to Anna’s coronation)

(also the Northudral are just totally fine with living in ice and snow and cold now too??? idk i guess Elsa asked first but whatever its not like they can say much she’s the fifth spirit so)

Olaf wearing clothes has me dead

Anna: tells Kristof she likes him “better in leather” me: when does he wear… leather :O (Anna’s freaky yo)

final thoughts: Amazing movie, the constant shade of Hans was absolute gold, Kristof is so pure, Anna and Elsa’s relationship is so amazing, everyone’s character growth is absolutely amazing

if you read all of this, bless you child I’m so sorry it was so long

#IM SORRY OKAY #thank you for coming to my ted talk #theres so many other things I've missed but i saw it last week and i just #i cant #frozen 2 #frozen 2 spoilers #frozen spoilers

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roxasboxas · 4 years ago

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A while back, I joked about rewriting the Frozen world from KH3. I’m excited to announce that I now have a full draft of the return notes I’d submit of someone gave me a concept write-up of the way that the world actually turned out. Draft under the cut

Outline

SDG arrive and immediately encounter Larxene

Sora: “Hm you’re not a vibe but I don’t know you” Larxene: “You’re a rude bitch for forgetting me like that” Sora: “Wait I do know you?” Larxene: “>:) do you >:)”

She’s like “anyways off to torment a princess of heart laterz” and Sora’s like “well obviously we have to go stop that from happening”

They run around for a bit and encounter Elsa who is fleeing Arendelle

Sora: “Hi we’re--” Elsa: “OH FUCK A DUDE” *ice labyrinth* SDG: “oh fuck an ice labyrinth”

Larxene shows up in the ice labyrinth like “HA suckers. Elsa’s gonna turn to darkness because of her fuckin anxiety and shit. We’re gonna get Nobody Elsa. Lexsa or some shit” and Sora’s like “she just needs a hug :(“ and Larxene’s like “are you fucking dense?? She doesn’t want a hug???” and then she leaves

SDG escape the ice labyrinth

Encounter: Anna

Anna: “hey have you seen my sister” Goofy: “whats she look like” Anna: “white hair--” Sora: “oh yeah we saw her. I think she needs a hug” Anna: “she TOTALLY needs a hug let’s go”

They go to Wandering Oaken’s Trading Post And Moogle Shop and get supplies

Kristoff shows up and homeboy is FLAT BROKE

Anna: “hm. What do yall make of that guy?” Sora: “I think we should help him out” Anna: “:0 you’re right let’s go” Donald and Goofy: “oh shit there’s two of them”

They buy him stuff

Kristoff: “Thanks” Anna: “can u take us up the mountain pls” Kristoff: “no” Sora: “ah but see. Youve failed to consider something” Kristoff: “?” Sora: “im baby” Kristoff: Sora: Kristoff: “FINE”

So theyre on their way (hooray!)

Larxene shows up again like “LOOK. whether or not she falls to darkness isnt even any of your business. just leave her be to figure her shit out” and Sora’s like “are YOU gonna leave her be?” and Larxene is like “this aint about me” and Anna’s like “it is now bitch” and Larxene leaves bc shes the only one allowed to swear

But she leaves them with a bunch of wolf heartless

Kristoff: “oh shit evil wolves” Anna: “not to be confused with regular wolves” Kristoff: “exactly”

Olaf time

Olaf: “Hi! My name is Olaf and I’m a representation of how much Elsa has missed Anna since she started repressing her powers and how much she still loves her and wants to spend time with her again” Goofy: “What?” Olaf: “I SAID my name is Olaf and I like warm hugs :)”

Some various shenanigans idk

Arrive at the ice castle

Anna: “Hi Elsa! :)” Elsa: “oh shit” Anna: “pls can u unfreeze Arendelle” Elsa: “would if i could. Get out of my house” Anna:

Sora: “hi again! :)” Elsa: “Please don’t be mad about the ice labyrinth and also please get out of my house” Sora: “im not mad dw i understand youre going through a lot rn which is. a BIG ol mood” Elsa: “.......” Sora: “do you wanna go home now?” Elsa: “i live here now” Sora and Anna: “Oh :(“ Elsa: “oh shit theres two of them”

Anna is very insistent about going home and Elsa accidentally freezes her heart and FREAKS. OUT.

The Gang Gets Banished

Olaf: “well that could have gone better” Anna: “you’re telling ME” Kristoff: “alright lets go visit my family they can fix this”

The trolls: “we cant fix this. get married” Anna: “WHAT ok” Kristoff: “i feel like there are other options” The trolls: “nope. Get married”

Kristoff: “Anna is engaged to someone else” Sora: “maybe they were talking about him then” The trolls: “we were no--” Kristoff: “good call. Let’s go”

They go back to Arendelle

They happen to arrive back at the same time as the ‘taking Elsa prisoner’ gang

Sora: “this is not conducive to her mental health” Donald: “since when do we know what mental health is?” Sora: “I’m gonna need so much therapy when the universe is not in constant danger :)”

Hans is like “I’ll take care of Anna you all can go home” and Sora is like “Cool we’re gonna help a snowman climb in through your window byeeee”

The plot twist of Frozen happens

Anna and Olaf are on their way to Kristoff

Hans tries to kill Elsa but she becomes a boss battle so SDG have to step in to keep everyone from dying out here

Anna gets in the way of Elsa’s limit break and freezes, shielding her newfound friends and preventing her sister from becoming a murderer in an act of true love and self sacrifice

Elsa reverts to regular mode and cries

Larxene shows up for boss fight two electric boogaloo

SDG beat her up

Anna gets better

yaaaaaay

#kingdom hearts #kh3 #i had to remove all my formatting #paste the unformatted text into this post #and reformat it #so that was something #anyways im probably not going to be doing a full rewrite if for no other reason than i have a lot of other stuff i wanna write rn #but this was fun!

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ellie-sande · 5 years ago

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Euphoria- a dumb bitch’s HOT TAKE

Okay, so here’s the deal. I’m gonna do an analysis of the characters I think are the most interesting (read as fuck McKay, he boring as SHIIIITT), so this shit is gonna be looooong. Y’all better brace yourselves UwUUUU 🥺😝😩😈

The episode: I didn’t really feel a strong emotion towards it??? Like, it was definitely the sloppiest episode by far in terms of the way that everything was edited and the timeline of events. It was visually stimulating and literal poetic cinema, as always, but that’s nothing new with Euphoria. I think a lot of the jumps between characters and scenes were completely unnecessary and honestly kind of agitating?? Instead of leaving us with new unanswered questions, we have the same ones we’ve had the whole season? In my opinion, it would’ve been more effective for them to have fully closed some plot points or at least bring them to a point where I’m still interested (I’m looking at you, Nate and Jules plot). But like, overall it's still a pretty decent episode. I think the ending was messy because we don’t know how much of it was just a music video and how much was legit part of the storyline which is a BIG DEAL. It just came after one of the best in the season, which made it feel significantly weaker. but tHat’S jUsT my oPINION 🤷🏾‍♀️.

Jules:

I think Jules is the biggest wildcard of the season, and we know so little about her, so it’s kind of difficult to understand what her intention is. I think that’s absolutely intentional by the writers because they want the audience in Rue’s head, y’know??? That’s my way of warning y’all that this shit is LONG 🤷🏾‍♀️

When Jules came clean about everything, she was doing what she thought was best for the relationship, which is open communication. She could tell that her not telling Rue about Nate was ruining the relationship (she said so in ep. 7). There was never malicious intent in her telling Rue about her hookup and Nate. She was just doing what she thought was right, and tbh??? IM PROUD OF THAT DUMBASS. One of her biggest issues is definitely effective and open communication and this is definitely a step in the right direction, y’know??

THAT BEING SAID, when I first watched the episode, I thought that her and Anna still flirting or whatevah and being iN loVE was out of character and went against the arc that I was expecting from Jules. BUUUUUT, I thought about it and here’s my take: I think that Jules just wants to be free from the external pressures in east highland, y’know? This whole entire season, her character did not get a fucking BREAK so I totally understand. There’s so much responsibility and pressure for her to be perfect or act a certain way, and for her, running away was the easiest way for her to disassociate herself from that responsibility. No 17 yr old should feel like the weight of the world and the safety of the people that she loves are on her shoulders. My bby @lameparty made an amazing point in our chat about how all of her actions (being more “free” and open about her issues with rue) are futile attempts at replicating the liberation and nonchalant-ness she felt while she was away. It’s her way of desperately (and unhealthily) bringing home that atmosphere.

i’ve seen a lot of people assume that jules is fully aware of her power over rue and takes advantage of it, uses her, and leaves her before she needs her next fix of attention, but i totally don’t agree??? i think that for the most part, jules has been emotionally supportive of rue and has been there for her when she needed her. i mean she did that LITERALLY EVERY EPISODE EXCEPT FOR 6+7 (for good reason. the bitch was going through the mOST). she never wanted or intended for rue to form a dependency on her, she just wanted her best friend to be sober and thrive because her mom was an addict and that ruined her adolescence (for obvious reasons). so when the people around her kept pressuring her with the weight of rue’s sobriety, she freaked out a bit (and for good reason. no one should be anyone’s sole reason to do literally ANYTHING). she knew that regardless of the severity of her actions, rue’s relapse was inevitable if the relationship continued on like that (i mean, in ep. 5, the bitch said WHEN you hate me, not if because she knows that in rue’s current mental state, a relapse, miscommunication, or a wrong step on jules’s side is inevitable). PLUS, jules is an extremely volatile person. her first instinct is to physically and emotionally escape whenever the going gets tough, so i think she knew that this probably couldn’t work.

Moreover, the bitch is embracing her queerness and as much as I don’t really looooveeee how she’s doing it, it makes sense with her character. I think she uses sex as an escape and a form of validation, so of course this is how she’s going to explore her sexuality. She just wants to be free and have fun and be adventurous atm and the whole Nate thing + being in her first relationship is not IT for her rn and that’s totally fair. That being said, I think her arc is gonna be about her accepting that freedom isn’t just sex and drugs??? It’s way more than that and comes in different (and way healthier) ways, but that’s what growing is. It’s learning from mistakes and figuring out what you like, so I can’t really be mad at her.

BUUUUUTTTT, my bitch said/did some things that i can’t stand by. she said that she loved rue at the train station, knowing that rue is weak for her and would probably give in and come with her on this wild adventure. that is FUCKING PROBLEMATIC. and prior to that, the bitch said that she THOUGHT THAT RUE WOULD THRIVE IN THE ENVIRONMENT THAT SHE WAS IN. WHAT??? as much as i believe that she had good intentions and she really just wanted to explore the world with her girl, that doesn’t negate the fact that it’s still manipulative at worst, inconsiderate at best, and problematic considering the dynamic that the two of them have. i get that she genuinely wants rue to meet her new friends and anna, but all in all, it’s so reckless for her to even consider it. she’s aware that rue is a recovering addict and she was willing to put her in a toxic environment where she would be surrounded by drugs and alcohol, making a relapse literally SO EASY. and on top of that, jules knows that she’s probably going to hook up with anna and considering that rue is so in love with jules, that would’ve hurt her soooo much, enough for her to probably want to numb the pain, y’know??? but all in all, that’s what growing up is. it’s two steps forward and one step back, y’know? even though jules is starting to see the beauty in honest communication and queerness, she did try to manipulate rue, even if that wasn’t necessarily her intention.

I think that Anna replaces Jules’s older, non-committal man to pine over. She never really fixed her problem of trying to find validation from the wrong people, it’s just expressing itself in a different form. It’s obvious that Anna is significantly older than her (peep the message that Anna sent about being shocked that Jules is in high school) and I think that just like a lot of people her age, she feels special or validated when she’s liked by someone older and more experienced. The relationship is obviously supposed to be a type of foil to her previous relationship with cis white men. Add the fact that there are facets of Anna’s personality that remind Jules of Rue, the gal that Jules is falling for, which makes them the perfect person for Jules to pine over because the relationship is something that she’s used to (texting, non-committal, toxic).

In summary, I think she loves the idea of Anna (independent, older, experienced, free spirited, and fun) but loves rue regardless of the fact that she doesn’t/can’t provide those things for her. I think that jules also associates Anna with adventure and discovery and as the young ambitious bitch that she is, it obviously is an attractive idea for her y’know??? for her, i think rue is the stability, monogamy and commitment that she might not be ready for yet, even tho she loves rue and wants a future with her. Her relationship with Rue is hard work and maybe a bit heartbreaking, but overall, the connection is stronger and the passion and commitment that she’ll give and receive will make the relationship way more fulfilling than whatever half-assed thing she’ll have with Anna. Next season, she’ll probably come back either heartbroken, unfulfilled or still in love with Rue, but the question is should rue take her back or nah y’know?? She’ll definitely be pining for Rue when she gets back and rue may not be available or willing anymore. We’ll seeeeeeeee.

Rue:

My bitch is in PAIIINNN and I hate it. I think that her saying no to leaving with Jules even if a big part of her wanted to run away with her is amazing progress for her. She finally chose her family and herself first, not Jules, which will break her dependence on Jules. Like, I’m SOOOOO proud of her and she’s come so far as a character. I’m not sure as to where the music video starts and the season ends, but I have two theories. Either she: never actually snorted that line of coke and we’ll see her progress next season OR she overdosed and came back to life. The fact that the song ended so abruptly means that the season will probably start right where it left off. Unless told otherwise tho, the show ends with her crying and remembering her family and all the shit she’s put them through because that’s a waaayyy more interesting arc (EDIT: JACOB SAID THAT RUE’S DEFINITELY ALIVE!!! I KEEP WINNING FR!!! MY! MIND!) She’s no longer a selfish addict with no reason to live. She’s seeing that the people around her, even without Jules there, support her and have been by her side through the most and maybe that’s good enough atm.

Lexi:

against popular opinion, i don’t necessarily think that the big reveal of her sexuality is that she’s a lesbian. to ME, it seems like they’re setting up that she’s ace and probs bi or homo-romantic??? the average sexual person knows who they want to fuck or kiss, and the fact that she has to ask for advice from her sister I think is foreshadowing that she doesn’t know. Not because she’s shy or because she’s a lesbian, but because she truly just doesn’t want to fuck anyone. and if that’s the case i’m SO EXCITED TF??? i’ve never seen that type of character arc on mainstream media and it’s sooo necessary to show that story in a positive light. i think that the show is waaayyy too intentional and clever to not give proper hints at her liking rue. If they were setting up her and rue, they should’ve done more to portray the pining on Lexi’s side. they’ve set up more of a longing for friendship and comfort than anything else and tbh???? that’s wayyy more interesting and relatable for me??? but that’s my opinion 🤷🏾‍♀️

That being said, i could see her and rue together next season bc the foreshadowing is sooo vague that they can do whatever the fuck they want next season. maude and zendaya need to work on their chemistry then bc iTS NOT CLICKING. i definitely think that rue is going to use her tho, which isn’t fair to lexi. additionally, lexi is a bit too soft to stand her ground with rue, and if rue goes down the relapse route next season, their dynamic is going to be the same toxic dynamic they had up until episode 5. She’s an amazing person that deserves better than being an easy out or second best.

i think that because she was raised in her sister’s shadow with a shit ton less attention and love from literally everyone in her family, she has low self-image, so it would make sense that she wants the intimacy that comes from a relationship. maybe her addiction is just being there for others bc no one was there for her when she needed them??? @lameparty spilt the truth tea bc they said that “she exists for other people right now and she exists in the safe + limiting shadow of her sister,” and i think that rue represents a sort of freedom from that because rue is only hers and rue can’t see her as second best to her sister. as a fellow semi-abandoned child turned mom-friend, this makes total sense to me bc she wants to make sure that everyone around her never feels as neglected as she did her whole life.

Rue and Jules:

honestly, i’m tired of people blaming rue’s relapse on jules not being there. she literally has had MI since she was a kid. this shit ain’t new. and even if it was new, the fact that so many of the viewers were angry at jules for not being there during rue’s manic/depressive episode angers me for three reasons. a) JULES WAS DEPRESSED. she legit didn’t leave her bed for the whole week, to the point that her father was worried. b) just like jules, rue probably only told her that she was feeling under the weather and that she missed her. how is she supposed to magically put together that rue is going through a depressive/manic episode??? c) no person should be your sole reason to be happy. y’all want a CODEPENDENCY not a relationship, and like i totally understand wanting to protect rue. she’s the main character and we’re always in her head, but from episode three, it was pretty obvious that her definition of love is really skewed. she said that you know that you love someone when you can��t live without them, which is generally reaaaallly unhealthy.

these two are such an interesting dynamic, and tbh, i think they’re actually really good for each other (not rn, obviously). i think this is a case of right person, wrong time. they’re obviously soul mates/star crossed lovers, but the problem is that neither of them is mature enough to be in a serious relationship. rue is a recovering addict with a dependency issue and jules is an overly eager, ambitious person that’s never been in a loving relationship. one of the biggest issues in their relationship is the fact that these two have different wants and needs from the relationship. rue fell for jules almost immediately, has wanted to be with her ever since, and wants stability, comfort, and monogamy. on the other hand, jules wants adventure, excitement, and exploration. jules obviously pictures spending her life with rue, but the problem is that in the moment, she can’t be with rue without hurting her because she’s still exploring her queerness, which means that she’ll have one foot out the door until she’s gotten her fill.

because of that, i’m really proud of BOTH OF THEM for standing their ground and choosing themselves instead of each other. i have no doubt that both of them had a part of themselves that regretted leaving the other person, but at the end of the day, it was what was necessary.

even though rue was the person that suggested running away, she became hesitant because she finally thought about her FAMILY. y’all, that’s AMAZING character development because, at the beginning of the season, rue literally walked over every person that was in her life in order to get her fix. she stole from her mom, got lexi to pee for her, yelled at fez when he didn’t give her drugs, etc. up until episode 5 or so, rue was an extremely selfish character with one exception: jules. from the moment she met jules, her only goal was to make her as happy as jules makes her just by being there, and because of that, she has sacrificed her comfort in some situations. this is the exact opposite of her previous issue where instead not caring about anyone including herself, she only cares about one person an exceeding amount. both of these are problematic. more importantly, this allows her to finally break her dependency on jules. rue fell for jules and stayed sober for her because it felt like she was her flashlight in the dark cave that is her life, and now, she has to find that jules isn’t the only light. her family, lexi, fez, the rest of the girls are all there AND my hope is that she finds that she can be her own light and do this for herself. as much as her decision hurts both the audience and rue, this shows that she’s not just a stagnant character and that she’s learning and evolving into an amazing person. i’m proud of jules because she didn’t stay behind out of guilt or worry. that would’ve perpetuated rue’s dependency and overall, probably made jules resent rue.

i think that jules was being honest when she said that she was in love with rue, i really do. there was an earnest and almost shy look in her eyes, which was so cute??? but it’s honestly more than that. jules looks for rue no matter where she is. for her, rue is her home and something that she finds comfort in. it was obvious in episode 4 and 7. in episode 4, jules runs to rue because she finds comfort in her. whenever she’s in rue’s arms, she feels a warmth that i don’t think she’s ever felt with anyone else and when she finds that tyler isn’t real, her first thought is that rue has been there for her through thick and thin and is her safe place. it’s obvious why she gravitates towards anna. she sees rue in her, which immediately makes her feel at ease. add the fake deep convo, their sex appeal and the drugs, and you have a hella messy situation. and then there’s the fucking romeo and juliet passage that jules recites to rue that basically says that she’s in love with rue, but thinks everything is happening too fast and will come crashing down. she knows that given that they had more time/weren’t so eager to get together, the relationship would be beautiful and flourish, but they aren’t giving each other the space to grow, which was eventually the end of their relationship (at least for now).

Kat:

I’m proud of her. She did the damn thing. NEXT

Nate:

I think that Nate and McKay are not all that different. His breakdown this ep is more or less for the same reasons as McKay’s breakdown after those guys assaulted him in front of his girl which is that he felt emasculated by his dad overpowering him. In episode two, he did the same flexing thing after his workout. I think it’s his way of feeling powerful and masculine. All this just shows that he needs fucking therapy, but he’s not just some sociopath y’know? His character is deeper than that and can feel pain and anguish. I’m honestly so happy that they included that because it both shows the abuse in his relationship with his dad which obviously carries into his relationships with women and grounds him as a character. that being said, nate is an asshole and there’s no better ship on this show than nate + electric chair 🥺😝😩(but, i’ll settle for prison or whatevahhhhh)

all in all, I think that this show has two amazing themes in it which are: teens are waayyy more resilient than people think and addiction comes in different forms and each of them is problematic and selfish. i think that the show is amazing at getting people to empathize with rue, but i feel like people need to realize that in the grand scheme of things, all of these characters are HUMAN and make a lot of shitty mistakes. no character should be cancelled just because they make a mistake, especially when the characters are supposed to be literal hormonal teenagers????? every character on this show is deserving of the audience's understanding (except McKay. FUCK HIM)

#euphoria #rue x jules #jules x rue #lexi howard #nate jacobs #im spiraling can y'all tell??? akldjfl;asdfkadslkjf;asdkjf;#jules protection squad where y'all AT????

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solongllondon · 4 years ago

Note

1, 7, 16, 28, 37, 44, and 48 for book ask game!

thank you!!! <3

1. What book did you last read?

(let’s preface this with the fact that im always reading at least 2 books at the same time lol)

i’m currently reading Amy Spalding’s We Used to be Friends, which is really cute and quite innovative! also re-reading Hot Milk by Deborah Levy because a friend wants us all to give her our favorite books with annotations on post-it’s in it for her birthday (super cute idea btw) so im doing that. but honestly, the only book im actually actively reading right now (aka reading more than 2 chapters a day from) is Midnight Sun. It is very bad which also makes it highly entertaining.

7. Do you borrow books from people?

i do!! and i will return them in pristine shape because i hate when people ruin borrowed books lol oops

16. What book has been on you TBR pile the longest?

probably all the lotr books? i read the first one ages ago but never read the others because they’re so fucking long. also war and peace.

28. First book that comes to mind, tell us about it. Rant

okay. so. mockingjay. (spoiler, i guess??) i totally get that she had to kill finnick to showcase the brutality of war and how quickly a life can end and it made sense to pick him because he had finally gotten his happy ending. but. but. but. has Suzanne Collins ever thought about the fact that maybe. just. maybe. i didnt want finnick to die or get eaten by lizard mutts?? has she?? he is the literal love of my life and she?? just?? did that?? it’s honeslty. still so rude of her.

also just in general people are quick to ignore mockingjay and say it’s bad and rushed but?? it isnt. it’s a brilliant book about the catastrophes of war and the awfulness of a tyrannical government and how in war people die quickly and there’s no time to mourn them, they’re just casulaties over all and it’s so clever and so well done and katniss’s ptsd is honestly expertly portrayed and you can still see that she is simply a 17 year old girl even if they all want to paint her up to be a war hero or traitor or both and how both the capitol and district 13 use her like they want to, essentially throwing her back into being a fucking puppet in their games?? GENIUS. Suzanne Collins is genius and we owe her. a lot.

37. Is there a book that you think everyone should read?

James Baldwin’s Notes of a Native Son. I read it for a uni course and it has not let me go since. Honestly, read anything James Baldwin ever wrote but definitely read Notes of a Native Son.

44. Favourite book quote, go.

This is gonna show how pretentious I am, already apologize:

“She was beautiful, but she was beautiful in the way a forest fire was beautiful: something to be admired from a distance, not up close.” - good omens, neil gaiman & terry pratchett

“All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.” - anna karenina, leo tolstoy

“But beyond that, in a time when things could still change, there were revolutions. The people rose, the empires fell and things changed. Liberty moves in arcs, rising and falling with the tide of time. - red queen, victoria aveyard.

48. Do you write, highlight, underline etc in your books

I do if they’re uni books no question. I also do it occasionally in none uni books. for example, i have two copies of the hunger games series, one is pretty for displaying and the other one is highlighted, annotated to death. i think there’s a few pages missing in the first book, at least. and if i wanna annotate a normal book i’ll use post-it’s.

thank you this was super fun!!

✨ Send me books asks ✨

#answered #books asks #ask games #this was so much fun thank you!!#spockssehlat

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nonestandagainstmyangst · 5 years ago

Text

Wee punk lets do thid and bring that troll of wabmnna be human you fuck called jodi i wanna see her suck you cock as i kill you. What no response hell i thought you hsd balls

Im easy to find but remember im a sharp individual i shoot straight to the hearrt if the mater and that makes me you fucin máster. So junior lets recsp sense illini idiots have comprehending issuesoh im sorgy too BIG a w___o____r__d 4 u. Figure that out snitch. Ook let r e c a p¡¡¡¡ so punk if you u n d e r s t a n d yoj either lett her go now to treatmentvwith proof shown to me or i come and take care of your problems im good st blood lietting like the days of yore o usuaññy dont leave scars but iiiill make exception in your case. So whatcha hhink buddy sound exciting rmto you your into role playing right. What your fucked up in the head you made an Enemy you understand there are in DSM motel i knew you would redpond and she wouldn't have been able to get out of there before I could get out of there and I would have to be able to get you to the house for the rest of the night if I could just leave you alone with me the whole day and then we were gonna have you all right after that night if you wanted to talk about it I was gonna have you back to the room for the rest and then you were gonna get the money and I would be able to get back on track again and then you could go on with my life in the future but you still can't believe I'm gonna be in trouble with the other guys and I want you to know that i'm not gonna be able to talk to the police about this incident but you still can't believe me but you know that I was just trying to get back on track again so I could have a better life than I did when I got home i thought I would be happy with my family but it was just a matter of time before I. Get out of there and get out of there and I would be happy to have you all on my own right now if you want me to be able to talk to you again tell me about your daily routine for the next few days and you will have to be able to get out and get the money out. I need you to get out and get the money. I am going to be in trouble now and i'm gonna get it. I think it's just the way I feel for you and I would like you to know that I am going back to the house and I would like to see you in ky life and I think you should have a better relationship than I was in that situation you know 8but you know that I was just trying for a good friend and then you were saying you want me but i'm not going back to the house and you will not let me go on with it I know you have to be in a position to do something about it but I don't think it's going anywhere but you still can't believe it and you don't want to do something about the fact that you have a lot of money and I don't think it's just that I have no idea why you are so much less likely to have the same experience with a good person who is more interested in you and I would like you to know that I am not the only one that has the ability to make the right choice but I love the idea of a better relationship to you and your family but it doesn't work that way I don't want you in

My kife

So ok anna and anna only vid chat now to verify right now or games over im waitng well ok then i guesz this partys gona get some bras shined up so every one grab your kevellar and how do they sai it in the illini sticks oh yea doooh see doooh lets fucjing rock boyz if she vid chats ti verify i get miney you ket her go all done otherwise well think yiu got it. Bye

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madamsixx · 5 years ago

Text

Beyond The Leather: Chapter 12: You’re Invited, But Your Friends Can’t Come

August 1985

It was My Bazzar Magazine Fashion New York Shoot today and I was very excited. I never thought I would get to this point. My Sports Illustrated Magazine shoot gave me more opportunities. I was getting more calls to do more magazines and more calls for movie auditions next year. I was making more money then I could imagine, and Tamara was over the moon with how I was presenting my self.

Speaking of Tamara, she had no clue about what happened with me when I went out with the Motley boys. And I wasn't planning on telling her.

"Hey girl you ready for your shoot?" Lisa asks walking into my change room.

"Just about." I smile.

"Don't smile." The glam team states as there doing my make up.

"Sorry."

I was finally done and I was ready to go. I looked amazing. I walked over to Lisa who was holding a camera. She wanted to take a picture with me. And I was happy to. We walked out of the room and into the hall. She looked like she wanted to say something but was a bit hesitant to.

"What's wrong Lisa?" I stopped her and asked.

"Its nothing it's just.... I haven't heard from Vince since the after party and.. I mean.... well... he told me he would call me." She shrugs.

I should have told Lisa this is how they behave. They sleep with girls and take off. You can't expect a real relationship to come from any one of them. Not even Tommy who is gaga over Heather.

"Look I'm going to take my pictures and then when Im done we'll talk more about this." I continued walking.

"Ok. It could probably be because Nikki got you high and drunk. Maybe that's why he's avoiding me." She crossed her arms.

I stopped in my tracks and looked at Lisa with wide eyes. What did she mean by Nikki got me high and drunk.

"Wait Nikki said I drank too much punch that had whiskey in it." I stated.

"You did buuuut when you were alittle tipsy he gave you brownies that had weed in it. And then got you high and took you to the bar and ordered you cranberry juice and jack. And that got you drunk." She giggled. "I thought he told you."

My breathing started to get heavy. I should have known that he would do that. And what makes it worse is that he was busy calling the hotel begging to speak me. And I let his call come through and spoke to him. He was talking casually to me like he didn't do a single thing. Every time I think he's a good guy something always comes up to tell me other wise. I even went as far as to thank him for taking care of me while I was drunk. Not knowing that he was the one that actually got me to that point.

"Mani....Mani." Lisa hit my shoulder.

"Sorry I'm good let's just go." I continued walking out to the set. I was to be taking a picture beside a white stallion in a barn area of some sort out side. I felt agitated and annoyed. I was suppose to be focusing on this shoot but instead I was focused on how much I was starting to hate Nikki. And hate is a strong word that we should not be using. But I'm using it, and it's being used on Nikki Sixx.

"Alright Miss Darlington grab the horse." The photographer shouted. I grabbed the horse with thoughts of Nikki in my head. Is there a reason why he didn't tell me that he was the one that got me drunk. Questions were running through my mind and I needed answers.

"Alright that's a wrap". The photographer shouted.

I headed towards my dressing room and just sat there looking at my self in the mirror.

Nikki Sixx equals trouble. ________

September 25, 1985

I have been waiting for this week to come by and it is finally here. New York fashion week. It was being held in Manhattan at the skylight Clarkson Square. I already booked 15 shows and was paid a lot of money for it. I walked down the aisle with my head held high owning it. Tamara actually cried, I was shocked. But she was so happy to see me up there.

My whole family showed up for the show. And also some friends. I called Slash and his family to see if they could come but unfortunately he wasn't able too. However he did have some good news for me. He found a band in July. He was trying to get a hold of me but I was so busy it was hard for us to talk. I think the bands name is Guns N Roses. He told me that they were playing in LA at clubs like the Whisky a Go Go, Trabadour, and The Roxy. After im finished in New York I'll head down to LA to check out there gig. I'm very happy for him.

Also Motley Crues Theater of pain album has been climbing to the top of the charts. So much for Vince saying that the album sucked. Speaking of Vince, I invited him to come and watch me walk my first runway. But not just for that, today was the last day of fashion week. But it's also my Birthday, and I'm having a party well actually a dinner. Vince agreed not to tell the other guys seeing as my family was here and I didnt want anything bad to happen. My mom really liked Vince. It turns out that Vince was quite the charmer. My sisters even liked him. Me and Vince agreed not to say anything about Vince being in the band Motley Crue.... for now. We settled on him being Lisa's date. And yes I got Vince to call Lisa, I felt really bad. But is it weird that I was starting to like Vince..... a lot.

As for Nikki he called and tried to talk to me but I confronted him and ended up hanging the phone on his lying behind. He's been calling non stop after that leaving crazy messges. Personally, I think he's psychotic. He should have just told the truth. But knowing him, its always lies that come out of his mouth. And I wasn't going to beleive a single thing he had to say.

We ate dinner and everyone got along well. I finally had somthing go right... for now. _______

October 18, 1985, Toronto Canada

12:00 pm

A couple days after my first runway and birthday I headed home for a bit of a much needed break. Especially because I was doing interview after interview and commercials. Me and my sisters just got back from shopping we bought alot of things, well I bought alot of things. Just to have some sister time felt so good. Since I became famous we haven't spent alot of time with each other so it was nice going out.

We started taking our clothes out of our shopping bags and trying them on.

"This dress is really nice I should wear it when we go out some time." I looked over at Selena she's the oldest but shes really short. She put on a short blue dress and it really looked nice on her.

"I think so too. I like this skirt and top." I say putting the clothing on the bed matching them together. "You guys care too much about what you wear it's annoying." Felicia my younger sister is a tom boy she likes wearing mostly T-shirts and sweat pants. Where as Selena and I like dressing up. Maya the youngest was 2 so we usually dressed her up.

"Iman phone!" My mom yelled.

"Who is it?" I asked

"Vince!"

I ran to go get the phone. "Vince hey what's up!"

"Hey Mani, guess what?"

"What?" I said,

"Motley Crue is in Toronto baby!"

He shouted with excitment. I thought he was joking but when I looked and saw the number on the phone. I realized it was a number at one of the hotels downtown.

"No way, oh my God we have to chill."

"Hell yeah we do girl. So uuuuh can you call up some of your friends and come down to the Maple Leaf Gradens show today?"

"Is that where you guys are playing?"

"Yeah you should come watch us. This show is gonna be fucking crazy!"

"Considering what happened last time when I went to go see you guys in New York and ended up a drunk mess in Nikki's room. I think it would be a great idea to pass on that. I can meet you before the show and we can go out. I know some really fun places."

"Oh yeah sorry about that."

"We'll talk more when I see you, what hotel are you staying at?"

"The Hilton. Meet me there for about 4."

"Sounds great."

"Listen I didnt-"

(Loud yelling)

"Hello, hello, Vince?" All I could hear was loud yelling and the phone being hit around.

"Hello.... Vince?"

"Mani?"

I can't even tell you how fast I dropped the phone. It was Nikki. And I had no intention of speaking to him. ________

3:15 pm

I called up some of my friends and we drove down to the Hilton. My crew was Mia, Ashley, and Anna. We met in elementary school and stayed friends. They have always been there for me. We had other friends but us four were the tightest. We were ride or dies. They were so excited to meet Vince. My friends are like me but a bit worse. I won't lie they're very judgemental divas and would never settle for less. Oh like me, so never mind. I told them about the rest of the Motley boys. But they weren't interested in them especially because of the way they looked. We finally made it to the hotel and I called Vince from downstairs.

"Hey there sugar!" Vince shouted.

"Hey Vince!" I shouted back. I ran and gave him a big hug. We both walked backed to my friends. They started giggling and smiling as if me and Vince were a couple.

"My friend Mia drove so were going to go in her car and go to this wings place." I smiled.

Vince put his arm around me and smiled with all teeth. "That sounds great sweetheart."

"Yeah that does sound great." We heard a voice behind us and we all turned around. It was Nikki and Tommy.

"Oh h..hey guys. Uh we were just heading out." Vince said in a nervous voice. Nikki was glaring at me. It was a look that I couldn't even read. But I knew he was angry. And so was Tommy.

"Hope we can join you. I mean we weren't invited." Tommy snorted and glared at us.

"Theres no room in my car. It only seats five people sorry." Mia stated and smirked at Tommy.

"Sweety we don't need your cheap car we have limos. Were rockstars." Nikki and Tommy pushed passed us and walked out.

This was going to be a very chaotic afternoon. ______

We arrived at Wings Palace and everyone ordered what they wanted. The boys were so loud and ordered alot of alcohol. They started getting very rowdy and people were staring at us. Some were disapproving of them while others were taking pictures of us. Young fans came over to ask for autographs and some girls would even go as far as to ask them to sign there breasts. And I mean lift up there shirts right there with no bra. Yuk.

"So why the fuck weren't we invited out hmm?" Tommy asked looking at me.

"Uh well..... I didn't know if you wanted to come." I scratched my head. Wow Iman great lie Tommy's down for anything.

"I smell a bullshitter." Nikki snorted looking at me.

"What ever Nikki." I rolled my eyes. Nikki sat right beside me in the booth he was on the right I was in the middle and Mia on my other side. Vince sat across, he was in the middle Anna on his right and Ashley on his left he had both arms around them. They were in heaven. Tommy sat in chair pulled up to the table.

"So Vince what's it's like being a Rock Star. I see the whole bad boys behaviour on TV but you honestly don't look the type." Ashley smiled.

"Pfft." Nikki snorted "Vince is just as bad as us."

"Probably, but he looks better that's for sure." Anna cooed.

"Why cause he's a blonde hair bitch." Tommy and Nikki laughed.

"Y'know jealousy dosen't look good on you two." Ashley sneered.

"Neither does your hair cut." Nikki laughed.

I turned and glared at Nikki. "knock it off." I hissed.

"Fuck off." He said flipping me off.

"Here are your wings boys." The server said as she brought our wings. She looked over at Nikki and smiled.

"Thank you bye now." I shooed her away.

"Jealous are we." Nikki smirked.

"I would never be jealous of a girl that wanted to talk to you." I snorted.

"You know Iman at one point I actually thought you were a cool chick, but seeing as you didn't even want me and Sixx around to meet your stiff friends I think your a fucking bitch." Tommy says waving his hands at me.

"Wow real classy I can see why she didn't invite you two losers." Mia said as she bit a wing.

"Fuck you stupid cunt!" Nikki shouted throwing wings at Mia.

"Nikki stop!" I shouted.

"Get these losers out of here. You think because your rockstars you can talk to people any how you want!" Mia shouted.

"Ok woah guys now calm down." Vince raised his hands up.

"This is why I didnt invite you two. Everytime I go out with you two something always happens. Your either drunk or high or both!" I yelled and pushed Nikki out of the booth.

Nikki got up and thrashed the table throwing all the food to the floor and spilling the drinks every where on everyone.

"Fuck you bitches! I heard you were hear and I wanted to say sorry for what I did last time!" He gestured to me. "But I change my mind, you deserved to look like a drunken whore at that party!" Nikki yelled in my face.

My eyes went wide. I didn't know whether I wanted to slap him across the face or kill him. Instead, I got out of the booth and ran out of the building. I had enough of this guy and I wasn't going to put up with him any longer.

"Iman wait!" Nikki shouted and ran after me.

I picked up my pace and ran faster with tears filling my eyes and running down my cheeks. I didnt want to see any one, I just wanted to get as far away from them as possible. I ran straight inside the downtown Library were I knew I wouldn't be found.

"Iman!" Nikki shouted, or I thought I wouldn't be found. I ran up the stairs and stood in the corner of the library. Taking my hands and rubbing my wet face.

"God Nikki just leave me alone!" I shouted.

"No!" He shouted back.

"Shh" we were both startled by the librarian who came over to us "This is a quiet library not a place for you guys to be yelling. You can do that outside." The librarian hissed. We both looked at each other and rolled our eyes.

"Please just leave me alone Nikki." I whispered.

"No." He argues. "Not until you hear me out." I rolled my eyes.

"Look princess I fucked up at the party when I got you drunk ok and I'm sorry. I didn't tell you because... because I knew if I did you would never speak to me again. And I didn't want that for us."

I sighed."Nikki I would rather you tell me the truth than lie in my face. It makes me wonder what else you actually lie about."

"Ok you want to talk truth. Well why did you invite Vince to your first runway and Birthday? You didn't even tell me, Tommy, or fucking Mick about it? What kind of bullshit is that?" Nikki raised his voice turning me to face him.

I should kill Vince for saying anything to them. I told him not to and now I have to answer for it.

"Well me and Vince became close we talk now and then. I tell him about things I'm doing and he tells me about the things he's doing." I say looking at my feet. I looked back up and Nikki and he just had a sad expression on his face.

"And you can't do that with me? That's what your basically trying to say right?"

"No Nikki I cant! And I don't want to!" I said that with a harsh tone. I wanted to hurt him like he hurt my feelings back at Wings Palace and for every other place he had hurt me. But when I looked into his eyes he looks like he could cry right now. And I felt a bit guilty for what I said. Until his face changed into the angry Nikki I was used to seeing.

"Fine fuck you then!" He snapped and walked away.

I met back up with my friends and we hung around later then I expected. We stayed for the show which turned out to be great. I had to call my mom from the arena so she wouldn't freak out. But she wanted me home anyways. We said our goodbyes to Vince and Mick. Tommy and Nikki ignored me and my friends. So that was a great night. Not!

_____ 3.22 am

I was in my room sleeping when all of a sudden a car horn started going off outside and someone started screaming my name at the top of their lungs. It was probably a crazy fan. All the lights went on and everyone ran out of their rooms and headed to the front door. I looked out the door and..oh my God it was Nikki. He was smiling drunkenly at me with his Jack Daniel's bottle in his hand. He was still in his stage clothes and he looked like a mess. Tommy was with him grabbing him trying to get him back in the car. How the hell did they know where I lived.

"Oh there look T bone! Awww theres my princess! Look how fucking beautiful you are!" Nikki slurred.

I moved and hid behind the door so he wouldnt see me again. I can't believe this guy came here like this. I'm so embarrassed.

"No! Mani baby please I'm sorry. I just...I'm a mess!" He slurred and fell on the ground with his bottle spilling.

"Who is this man?" My mom yelled "call security right now and get these dirty drunks off my property now!" My demanded. "Get off my property or I'll call the cops!" She yelled in there direction.

"Look im really sorry I'll take him home please don't call the cops!" Tommy shouted back.

"Mani baby just wait for me please. I'll get my shit together I promise! Just dont break yours!" Nikki shouted as Tommy picked him up and through him in the back of the car.

"I'm really sorry!" Tommy shouted and waved. He got in his car and drove off.

My mom shut the door and looked at me with a straight face. "Start talking now!" She shouted at me.

"I don't... I don't know those guys." I said with a hesitant voice.

"Do not lie in my face. Cause if I find out that your involved with any guy. You are done with your career. Especially if he looks like that pile of junk outside! They look like a bunch of leather head rock stars! Well not for my daughter! You will get a good Catholic man!" My mom pointed in my face.

"I don't know him, it happens in LA a lot when I'm on the streets." I whispered. I was terrified of my mom. I felt like I was about to pee in my pants when she gave me that look. The sweat was drizzling down my face and in my Pitts. My breathing was heavy and I felt like I was going to pass out.

"Good for nothing rock star junkies is what they are." She walked away and my sisters looked at me then walked upstairs to there room. I hated lying to my mom, but this lie had to be told.

I walked up to my room and I couldn't sleep for the rest of the night. I thought about the promise that I made to Nikki. A promise that unfortunately I would have to break. My mom would never accept Nikki. Even if I ended up falling in love with someone like him. She could never accept him for all his chains and leather.

#nikki sixx #vince neil #tommy lee #mick mars #motley crue #the dirt #model #chanel iman

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sleepingfancies · 5 years ago

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please go off abt detective loki,,, im curious to hear what u have to say abt him!!! 💖

*SLAMS CHAIR DOWN*

SO. YOU WANT ME TO GO OFF ABOUT LOKI.

Praying for you that this read more link works bc otherwise this is gonna be a Cursed Post to all my poor followers. Shit gets long. I have A Lot to say akdjfshfk

Thanks to the investigative skills of the amazing and wonderful @deputyrook (ily), I recently learned that Detective Loki’s backstory included such things as: serving time in juvie, he was formerly religious, and he also possibly suffered from some kind of drug addiction he’s now clean from. It was briefly mentioned in the movie that he spent 6 years in a boys’ home (a rather rough one, by the way Loki talked about it). Boys’ homes are, by definition, “residential sectors where boys are provided food and care when they cannot be adequately cared for by their families, either due to a family crises or the child’s own behavioral issues.”

What this tells me is that:

A) Loki most likely had some heavy childhood trauma that drove him into being a “bad kid” (not that such a thing actually exists, imo, but that’s another essay for another day). It probably took well over a decade to get himself stabilized.

B ) Loki of present day has no family, no personal connections, no friends, absolutely nothing to call his own except the clothes on his back, his car, and... maybe a place to live? I assume he has one somewhere, but we never see him there - he’s constantly either prowling around town or at the station.

C) Loki’s occult tattoos, and his general distaste for anything religious, probably come from an internal place of feeling like some higher power abandoned him along the way. I have no doubt he carefully selected each one to have some personal meaning, but ultimately they all tie back to distancing himself from Christianity (double that if he was religious as a child, or came from a religious family). This also makes me wonder if his last name was something else, and that he changed it to “Loki” upon getting himself back on his feet.

D) Heading off of the boys’ home note; boys’ homes, like most other institutions in the US, legally can’t force residents to stay once they turn 18. Assuming his time there ended at 6 years because he aged out and went off on his own, well, for one that means he was admitted when he was 12 years old. Which is... wow. For two, that means his behavior was never necessarily resolved. Which, given how Jake plays Loki, I’m inclined to believe (I’ll touch on that later).

All of this leads me to some interesting observations during the movie.

For one, Loki is amazing at staying the “adult in the room” in the face of belligerence (e.g. Keller Dover losing his shit in Loki’s car). I know personally, it is almost physically impossible for me not to get my back up when someone else decides they want to take some aggressive tone with me - and I am about as far as one can get from a “troubled kid.” So I have to wonder how many years and how much abuse Loki endured to be able to choose not to respond to people antagonizing him? I have a hard time believing it was just police training that got him to this place of neutrality. And it seems to me like he’s making a genuine effort to stay calm, and to calm the people around him (”please just let me do my job”).

Which leads me into something Mrs. Dover said. “They say you’ve solved every case you’ve ever had, is that true?” And to be fair, I assume Loki’s silence there is supposed to imply that that isn’t true, but it implies so much beyond that. It implies he puts 100% effort into his cases, that he barely sleeps when he knows there’s a chance he can put dangerous people behind bars and save innocent lives. It also implies he feels deeply about the cases he hasn’t solved, or the ones where he got the perpetrator put away but the victims didn’t make it out alive. He carries that with him, constantly.

We see more of this when Keller recognizes his daughter’s bloody sock. His immediate response is to blame Loki. “This is your fault. You didn’t try hard enough. You did this to my daughter.” And Loki says nothing, he doesn’t make any different expression - but his eyes twitch. Jake Gyllenhaal remarked that this was a physical tic he improvised for Loki, one that served as Loki’s channel for intense emotions and/or becoming overstimulated with thoughts and information. Rather than actually emote, his eyes twitch. There is nothing newly informative or particularly overstimulating about the bloody sock scene, which leaves only intense emotion to be the cause of that twitch. And given Loki’s panic when he was searching Bob’s house and boxes for Anna and Joy, I doubt it’s anger. I’m willing to bet it’s that Loki already feels that way. He’s blaming himself. Keller just spoke Loki’s own feelings into existence.

I’ll circle back to that in a minute, because I think Loki making his cases so personal is very telling of his character.

Now, to go back and touch on why I think it’s most likely Loki aged out of the boys’ home rather than graduated - Loki has adapted with his behavior, he hasn’t resolved it at all. It does not seem to me at all like Loki has therapeutic strategies, especially considering I’m 99% sure any therapist or behavior counselor would not encourage bottling up your emotions and disconnecting yourself from human contact. Loki made these steps on his own. He learned to redirect his anger to people who deserved it by becoming part of law enforcement. He decided that he was safer closed off and unavailable to intense emotions. He might’ve even decided other people were safer stuck on the other side of his walls.

There are a whole of two times Loki clearly loses his temper - when Bob keeps drawing mazes rather than giving him a straight answer, and when Bob kills himself and Loki realizes he just lost his best lead. While these are both reasonable things to get worked up about, he reacts so intensely and so personally to them that (circling back to my earlier point) it tells me, deep down, there is an incredibly soft and vulnerable heart in there that’s been locked up for decades.

Loki didn’t want Bob to kill himself. He didn’t mean for things to escalate that far. You can hear it in his voice, he’s genuinely shaken and upset by what just happened. In the following scene when he basically destroys his desk, that is directed at no one and nothing but himself. He’s so angry at himself - for not understanding Bob’s maze, for getting Bob killed, for having to tell the Dovers their one suspect is gone, for feeling helpless when it comes to finding the girls. Loki doesn’t deal well with other people’s failure, but he doesn’t even accept his own.

And I mean - do I even need to mention when he finds Anna? The man is bleeding profusely from a bullet wound in his head, he’s half unconscious, he’s a long way from the hospital, but he doesn’t even think about any of that. He makes it his one singular goal to get her to the emergency room even if he dies trying. And the way he talked to her? “Stay with me Anna, don’t die, just hold on.” I know on the surface it’s obviously just a tactic to keep her (and himself, let’s be honest) awake. But it was so deeply feeling, so honest, so raw, so panicked?

I don’t know, man. I’ve said things to other people before that I wished someone had said to me, and that’s what those lines sounded like to me. Which, if he had been a drug addict at one point, and if he overdosed but no one was there for him? The puzzle pieces fit.

And then to have people visit him in the hospital? To have someone call him a hero? He has no idea how to react to that, because I’m guessing neither of those things have ever happened to him before. And he isn’t really sure what to say to someone being so overwhelmingly grateful for and to him. So he doesn’t really say anything. His eyes just twitch. We can fill in the blanks.

The man has a soft heart, a vulnerability that he refuses to let anyone see, but it’s there. He’s just as scared and angry and confused as Keller 90% of the time. He just hides it better.

Which, ultimately all of this leads me to the conclusion that - for as far as Loki’s distanced himself from religion, as clean as he is now, as stable as he is, as well as he’s channeled his anger, as guarded as he keeps himself - this entire job, to him, is a chance at redemption.

Loki doesn’t think he’s deserving of love. He doesn’t believe he’s capable of having the kind of stability the Dovers are so familiar with. He doesn’t think he can just slide into a friend group after all these years. He doesn’t regard his own life highly. But the ability to save other people’s lives and keep dangerous people locked away - that’s his apology to the world. Of course he cares about these cases because he’s a good man, but it’s more than that. It’s that he believes this is the only way he cant repent for not always being a good man.

Which leads me to his first name. I’ve rambled about the symbolism of his name to @deputyrook before, but David. David. Given all of the Biblical symbolism in this movie, personally my mind immediately leaps to David and Goliath.

David - detective Loki and his desire to be a good man - is in a constant war against Goliath - Loki’s own trauma and troubled past. And there really isn’t a way to have one without the other, which makes Loki’s character so tragic. He isn’t ever going to heal, not completely, not when his entire career is him trying to apologize over and over again. He solves almost all the cases he’s given because he won’t, can’t, accept more failure.

Loki’s last line in the movie is “pray for the best, prepare for the worst.” For being a character so deeply centered in anti-religion, that’s an odd line to make his last. Combine that with how strange it is that he wouldn’t also change his first name, if he changed his last name to distance himself from religion. His name, and that last line, might just be symbolic of the few shreds of hope he has for himself. Hope that maybe he can have what the Dovers have, the hope that maybe one day when he’s gone he’ll be remembered by somebody and for something good.

Because that’s really all he wants, all he can hope, for himself. Since he doesn’t think he’ll ever have human connection, or love, or a family - as much as he would like to have those - he’ll settle for being just a little more than somebody’s bad memory, or being a little more than some name on a headstone.

#anon you are the kindest person i've ever known for indulging me about this #sksksksk #detective loki #it's my fucking boyfriend!!#anonymous #answered #i am VERY soft about this man #because he feels *so much* but he'll never let anyone know that #deep down he's just some 12 year old angry kid who never got what he needed #so he's settled for never getting it #UGH i'm soft #tw drug mention #tw suicide #tw suicide mention #long post #longpost #Anonymous

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greensleevesredlipstick · 6 years ago

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i dreamed a dream

fic based on this ask where they're in the school play les mis together. howard is cosette, boleyn is fantine, parr is eponine, cleves is madame thenardier, aragon is sister simplicity, and jane is the stage manager/director (im not a theater person whatsoever so im not gonna lie, idk the difference). hope u all enjoy!!! any other fic prompts feel free to send :)

jane arrived to the auditorium first. it was their first show after an exhausting tech week, but she was excited to see the cast and crew’s hard work pay off. the long days, nights they had to order pizza to the school instead of getting home cooked meals, and early mornings, would all be worth it. It was her senior year and the drama teacher, Mr. Tudor, was finally letting her make her directorial debut. as the others trickled in, Jane greeted them nervously. the crew was in place, making sure the lighting was just right. she saw most of the cast in their dressing rooms getting ready but when she did a headcount, she noticed that one was missing. catherine aragon, a sophomore, said “pretty sure it’s anne who’s late. again”. Jane caught her tone of annoyance, but didn’t have time to dissect it. she had to make sure that everything else was in order. as she crossed the hall to the other changing room, anne nearly ran her over. out of breath, she started to apologize to Jane. Jane had to laugh; they had been in shows together since Anne was a freshman and she was a sophomore and she could count the occasions anne was on time on one hand. she pushed her friend into the dressing room warning her that she “better be dressed in time, or else” and tried her best to be menacing. Anne laughed, and Jane continued on to the next room. As she walked away, she mused over the contrast between anne and her character. she was able to flip the switch from anne the chaotic teenager to fantine the heartbroken mother in an instant. she wondered where inside Anne that emotion came from, and resolved to have at least one heart to heart with her friends in the future. in the meantime, she had work to do.

When she pushed on the door to the second dressing room, she found that it was locked. She frowned. none of the doors were supposed to be locked; there were people coming and going constantly. she jiggled the handle, but it refused to give way. she heard the voice of anna cleves, a junior who had only joined drama club that year. anna said nervously “give us a minute, please”. annoyed, Jane responded “look, I guess you don’t know how things work around here but-”. the door swung open and anna swiftly pulled her inside. jane quickly caught sight of katherine howard, one of the leads, crying in the corner of the room. she was only a sophomore and Mr. Tudor had doubted her ability, but jane had insisted on casting her as cosette. Jane had gotten to know the young girl, and had been blown away by her talent and poise-which is why she was so confused as she watched anna wrap her arms around the younger girl as she sobbed. she locked the door behind her and said softly, “what’s wrong, Kat?”. Katherine took a shaky breathe and said “it’s nothing, please don’t worry about me. I know how busy you are.” Over her girlfriend’s shoulder, Anna mouthed “stage fright”. Jane said “honey, let me do the worrying. everyone gets nervous sometimes, its only natural. you have nothing to be ashamed of”. Kat choked out “I’m 16, for gods sake. people get stage fright when they’re in like, fifth grade. not one of the leads in high school. whatever, I’ll be fine. just leave me alone. Actually Anna, you can go and get ready too. I’ll be fine”. Anna pulled her closer and said firmly “i’m not going anywhere” and Jane added “me neither. tell us what’s going on. you’ve been in shows before, haven't you?”. there was a long pause. finally Kat said “yea, I have. but this one feels different. I know that Mr. Tudor didn’t want me here, and I think some of the upperclassmen are mad at me for taking the lead from them. I can’t go on stage and then mess up and prove them right because they’ll all laugh and then I just don’t know what I would do”. katherine was breathing heavily. “shhhhh, it’s okay babe.” said Anna, rocking her girlfriend. Jane jumped in “hey, I have a lot of pressure on me, too. I knew that you were up to the role or I would have given it to someone else. You’re the most talented, powerful, graceful performer that i’ve seen. Don’t worry about proving the rest of them wrong, go out there and prove me right”. She gave Katherine’s arm a squeeze. Just then, there was a banging on the door. “Can someone let me in please???” Jane recognized Anne’s voice. “I kind of uh...can’t find my costume. Is it in there??” kat let out a little laugh. “i’ll be fine, really. Jane, you definitely have other things to be doing.” Jane glanced at Anna and said “well actually...” anna said “i’ve got this. go.” with one more concerned glance at Kat, Jane left to help Anne (and get the rest of the 50+ cast and crew together). Alone again in the room, Kat and Anna put their foreheads together. Katherine’s breath slowly returned to normal, but she still looked pale. Katherine finally brought her eyes up to meet Anna’s. Anna said simply “I believe in you, babe. pretend you’re singing just in the shower, and you’ll blow them all away”. Katherine exhaled, and they slowly started to get ready together.

in the wings, catherine parr and aragon ran through their lines together. although parr was a senior and aragon was only a sophomore, they had become fast friends during rehearsals. parr often tutored aragon in the courses she had already taken, and aragon repayed her with ice cream from her dad’s store. they looked out into the audience and were filled with nervous anticipation at the size of the crowd. they scurried backstage to put the finishing touches on their costume, whispering to the others about the full house. as the curtain rose and the opening notes to “look down” all of Jane and the rest of the cast/crew’s work fell into place.

For Katherine, the show was a blur. she saw bits and pieces; the melody of “heart full of love”, the red white and blue of the waving flags, and the roar of the crowd. when they took their final bow, she grabbed anna’s hand extra tight. she squeezed, and anna squeezed back. as the cast headed off stage, boleyn scurried off to her locker down the hallway. as Jane stepped on stage to take her bow, anne proudly presented her with a bouquet of flowers. she beamed as she listened to the crowd roar for one of her closest friends. once the cast finally changed out of their costumes and seen their friends and family, Anne announced “POST GAME AT MY HOUSE!!!”. the group cheered loudly, but groaned when Jane said “we’re back here at 11AM, so I don’t want to hear about anything too crazy”. Cleves chimed in “you won’t have to hear about it, you’re coming.” “that's right” parr declared. “you’re with us”. They piled into the senior’s cars and headed to Anne’s house, thrilled with how the show had gone.

Jane, ever the responsible one, spoke to each of the drivers and made sure that they weren’t drinking. parr and her were both designated drivers, but they still joined in the fun. anne was predictably the life of the party, climbing on top of her kitchen counter and belting out the lyrics to chicago’s “cell block tango”. Aragon rolled her eyes at boleyn’s rowdiness, but didn’t let that stop her from dancing with the rest of them. after a drink or two, Jane even spotted boleyn and aragon doing their synchronized choreography to “dancing queen”, the previous years production, together. anna and katherine danced together in the corner. anna laughed softly. new to the theatre scene, she said “only theatre kids would drink to ABBA”. they swayed together, offbeat from the rest of the cast, but they didn't care. anna pulled katherine closer and said “I’m so proud of you, babe. you nailed it, and you made me proud”. Kat added “as a plus, I didn’t ruin Jane’s night”. as they kissed, “seasons of love” began to play. they swayed together as the rest of the cast belted out “five hundred twenty five thousand...”

#first fic in a while that i dont hate lmfao #but KEEP SENDING REQUESTS AND ILL KEEP WRITING #OTHERWISE I WONT CAUSE I HAVE 0 IDEAS #anyways yea enjoy :)#six #six the musical #six fanfic #six the musical fanfic #anne boleyn #katherine howard #anna of cleves #jane seymour #catherine parr #catherine of aragon

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namelessstoryteller · 5 years ago

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I'm not like her other friends

Recently got a message from friend I'm calling Linn. Linn was my first friend when I started High School, and I made friends with Anna and Joe, who were her childhood friends, and a chick I chatted to in homeroom named Freda, who was Linn's bff.

Two events started the downfall from me getting kicked out of this group. I felt like a taxi driver while driving Linn and Freda around on Halloween, and mentioned to Linn, hey I don't like being a third wheel afterwards. So whenever she brought up hanging out with Freda, as I was the only friend with a car, I always rejected it. The second was I brought us tickets to Impractical Jokers, our fav show that was touring in our town that year. She agreed to pay me back the 70 over time. This was the only time I ever asked her for money in the 6 to 7 years of friendship.

Linn never had much money so I hung with her and brought the tickets, the food, and the events. I hung out with her because I could always make her laugh and loved our shared interests.

However, turns out everything that was said, was shared between Joe, Freda, family, and others. I got a bf and wanted to ask her yknow girl/perverted questions, I wanted a conversation about this stuff with her as we been friends for years and I only knew her attempts at relationships. I made her feel uncomfortable with this open conversation. I apologized but I learned this was shared with everyone and I was a bad friend for not noticing the signs.

A group chat was formed later on, with Joe, Freda, Linn, rando, and a chick named Iris. I knew Iris but I really don't know what side she was on throughout this whole thing, she had conversations with both of us and sent me screenshots from Linn, so I suspect she did the same for Linn. I made a comment, like "what up b*tches" and that fucking broke Freda. Apparently I hated her and it was aimed at her. And Im insensitive (which is a bit true but I have said worst, and Linn brings this up a lot later on).

I wanted an overnight hangout for spring break, I invited Linn, Joe, his gf, Anna, Iris. Linn knew I smoked and drank, but due to the friend group, I was never planning on bringing those items along. They didnt know I only invited them, my bestie, and a HS friend. Only Iris ever drank. Only my bestie smoked.

After hearing no, I gave up and just went to the hotel with my best friend and our HS friend. I had a good time playing uno. But Linn asked to hang that night and I told her I was doing this as I had planned a long time ago.

Apparently I got blocked from the friend group (i had it muted so I never noticed), i only noticed when I got invited back and saw the messages.

"That's so messed up of you S to leave one of your real friends whose been there for you" said iris.

It been planned for a long time, it was even planned with everyone in mind.

"I don't wanna start anything bc she'll just try 2 play the victim lol" "I don't trust her with alcohol and weed. But now I kinda don't trust her with a lot of things" "I mean if you look how Savannah grew up, you see why she is the way she is...." "I didn't like her mom the moment I saw her"

No, I had party friends and a pothead cousin. The mom comment is because my mom smokes cigarettes and Linn hated the smell and called her mom to leave my house. And I moved to my grandparents years later.

"She's reckless and tbh I'm sorry to say this but she is also kind of a hoe" said Joe. The same guy who wanted me to sleep with him when I had a bf for over a year. And he even said if I slept with him (while having a gf) that he would put in a good word. Linn agrees "I only want to find a bf and sleep with him. Not sleep with the whole town"

"Ig when I hang with her again I don't want drama but I have 2 talk 2 her maybe steer her on the right path maybe she's secretly sad. And puts her pain into weed and drinking"

No, when Im sad, I talk to you or my bestie, but then that gets shared to everyone so I stopped talking to you about my feelings.

I don't remember when this happened, but I made a comment about her oversized bra as she had tiny chachas. My mistake. Everyone has body issues, and that was hers, and I spent an hour apologizing as sometimes I do run my mouth. I just felt like the bra didn't mean much if it wasnt padded, but just there for air for her body type.

Through months of talking. Getting mad at each other. Stopped talking. Unfriending each other. Of how Im not like her other friends. We agreed on a movie. I sent her a msg at 10am asking if 10pm was a good time to go see a random movie, she read the message. I never got a message back until 9pm saying she was ready. I told her, dude message me sooner I thought you ignored me and got ready for bed. And she got mad I didn't tell her I got ready for bed while she was prepared to go out. I said it's a movie we can reschedule, it's too late to drive to her home and movies especially when it's opening night. This, of course, got her mad. I said Im sorry for the miscommunication on my part.

I heard back from her 3 days later, 4 days before the Impractical Jokers. "Are you still taking me to Impractical jokers?" At this point, I'm over these issues and her so I finally stood for a battle.

I replied, "Linn, how things are looking like right now, probably not. And I don't really feel bad since it wasnt paid." I told her I didn't want to because she more focus on the tickets when we still had last arguement.

She had 5 dollars, I told her at least 25 (not even half the price but it was something) or least try to pay me in small amounts. She said she was saving up for something so 15 at most, and I repiled like you tried saving up for these tickets.

She said "Ur like my only friend who wants me 2 pay back a concert ticket. Everyone else has brought it out of just being nice. But I did agree to pay back $70 which tbh is too much. So I said $15 but Idek bc rn I have $5" "U want me 2 ask ppl hey can u give me money bc my friend wants me 2 pay her back 4 a concert? They aint gonna do that Bc they're gonna say that's ur friend's problem"

It's your problem, Linn. Not mine.

She said this should be her bday gift, and when I brought up how much I spent on her throughout the years, she said "you never had to and Plus u should kinda do that out of being a good friend not do it 4 money btw....but now ik not 2 ask u 4 shit bc ur gonna want me 2 pay u back 4 it. I wouldn't want u 2 pay me back but that's just me 💁💁"

She msg me on my phone. Went through the cycle of her saying hey I can make payments now, and me saying it's too late since I already invited someone else, "Im money hungry/i never apologized", she had family issues and is broke, stop bringing up things in the past she already apologized for (when she brought up things I apologized for). How she kept me as a friend, how loyal she was, when all of her friends and family told her to drop me, who knew every single bad detail about me, every bad secret. Yes, this came up a lot during our disputes. Even when I told her I didn't care what her friends thought cuz I wanted just us talking.

I thought we liked to hang out together, but maybe it was just me who enjoyed those times. She always wanted someone else there. Anna, Iris and Joe I was okay with just in small amounts because of gas. Plus, those guys never had money either and I can only pay for so many. Maybe I was her friend because I had a car and okay with spending money.

So yes, I'm the bad apple. I've been living with the same guy for the last two and a half years, clean from weed for the last one and a half (bf told his dad he would stay clean, i only smoked because i was always offered some by others), drinking once a month.

And then Linn messaged me on my bday, happy birthday we should hang out with anna she misses you!

Uhuh. Sure. Maybe someday.

Sorry I had to rant since apparently I always saw myself as the victim. I did fuck up with the uncomfortable questions and bra comment. I felt I had these conversations with my other friends, so why not with the friend I had for the longest. But the movie ticket, like come on seriously?

Tl;dr toxic friendship turned bad, got witchhunted by my "friends" and money hungry for a ticket I brought.

#toxicity #toxic #broke bish #bad friends #insensitive #argument #heart break #bullies #witchhunt #seriously #toxic friends #toxic friendships

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seriouslyhooked · 6 years ago

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Lost Souls and Reveries (Part 13)

22 part AU written for @cssns. Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6,Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12. Story available on AO3 Here and FF Here. Banner created by the amazingly talented @shipsxahoy!!

Killian Jones is a wolf shifter without roots, without plans, and without a pack. He’s a rogue, someone humans should avoid and shifters should be wary of given his lineage. But one night years back set him on a path he didn’t realize he was taking, a path leading to a future he is destined for. That future is tied up in one woman – a human named Emma Nolan. Together Emma and Killian will find not only answers, but a love that’s truly fated. But will love be enough to set them free, or will past demons win out in the end? (Answer: love always wins – I am writing this so despite some tiny pockets of angst it’s basically a fluff-filled insta-love fest). Rated M.

A/N: Hey everyone! So after a long time away this chapter comes bringing some interesting new elements to the mix. I know that we have the Liam confrontation still to come, but there was another important thing that needed to happen too: Elsa and Anna needed to find out about magic. This chapter is bringing us to that moment, as well as throwing in some other elements as well. A lot of this you guys might have guessed at some of this, but I’m hoping you enjoy the layers and elements I’ve had tucked away in my mind since starting this story. As always thanks so much for reading and I am really looking forward to seeing what you all think!

Life as Emma knew it was totally and completely different than it had been just weeks ago.

Before this summer started, and before she’d found the gift of a mate and learned some big secrets about how the world really worked, she’d lived a normal life. There had been some instances of strangeness, and certainly there had been struggles strewn into her story here in Storybrooke Maine, but on the whole she’d been just a regular girl who met each and every day with a certain set of definitive facts. She didn’t even ever think about them, they were just supposed to be given parts of life, and one of those fundamental truths was that magic wasn’t real. It was a figment of fiction, a childish dream, a beautiful, hopeful imagined force, but it wasn’t supposed to actually exist.

Yet now she knew better. Emma had witnessed first hand some of the varied ways magic manifested itself. She’d seen shifters and encountered Ruby’s visions. This morning she’d even witnessed a bit of spell casting by Killian’s cousin as well, but Emma had been told by Ruby that it was nothing compared to what she’d see in the future. This was ‘mild magic’ but the magic brought about by Emma’s oldest and dearest friend was supposedly far more miraculous. That was amazing to imagine, but at the same time it didn’t make things any less uneasy. She was currently walking up the road to Elsa’s house preparing to tell her she was a witch and that was crazy. There was nothing about that that was normal or expected, and as such Emma was just a tiny bit concerned.

“You’re going to do the talking, right?” Emma asked, checking with Ruby for the fifth time this morning about what was going to happen when they got to Anna and Elsa’s home.

This reveal had been on Emma’s mind in some capacity since Ruby and Granny showed up in Storybrooke, but now they were on the precipice of the confrontation and Emma was more than a little nervous. This was a huge secret and also a very intimate one. It would explain so much about Elsa and about Anna and their family, and Emma imagined it would be a real awakening for her friend, but at first Elsa might resist. All these years people had been teasing Elsa about her dreams or lovingly pushing the thought that maybe she truly had a gift. Emma and Anna had always known Elsa was special, but now there was more information and more possibility. If Ruby’s assessment of Elsa’s gifts was right, there was a whole new world that was about to open up to Emma’s best friend, and Emma knew that while Elsa would eventually be grateful, she might very well be hesitant at first.

Understandably Elsa was not a great proponent of change. Losing their parents so young had impacted both Elsa and Anna in incalculable ways. For Anna it had made her want to live each moment to a fuller extent. She never let a day pass where she didn’t tell people what they meant to her. She ended every friendly hang out session with an ‘I love you,’ and a huge hug at the very least. Anna was continuously grateful and energized, but she also took risks. She always said that life was all in the way you lived it. She never wanted to be afraid, and so sometimes she took things to extremes.

Elsa was almost a polar opposite, and Emma knew it wasn’t merely because she was a more introverted person. So much of that tendency towards caution had come from being the eldest sister. She’d taken on the role as caregiver and as pseudo-parent, and though Emma’s family and the whole town had come together to help the girls when their parents passed away, Elsa never shied away from her responsibilities. She became Mom and Dad and sister, guide and best friend, teacher and peer. As a result, Elsa would do anything for Anna, but in the rest of her life she was guarded. She never expended too much unnecessary energy and never gave too much away. She sided with safety and certainty, and this big reveal would hardly feel like a sure thing.

“I’m doing the talking,” Ruby promised, her hand coming to Emma’s arm in a sign of comfort. “Well, at least until you get comfortable. And you will, Emma. I promise. It’s gonna be great. I can’t see everything, as you know, but I can sense how things will end and it’s going to be more than okay.”

“I’d trust my cousin on this, love,” Killian said from Emma’s other side, squeezing her hand in a reassuring sign of connection as he did. “Ruby is never wrong about these things. If she’s confident enough to voice a vision, it will come to pass.”

“Damn right it will,” Ruby said with pride, and Emma was happy for this tiny fleeting moment.

Killian’s family might have come because of a bad situation on the horizon (and according to Ruby’s estimates they were still some time away from any kind of confrontation) but they’d done their best to live and be themselves since then. Killian’s deciding to stand his ground and confront Liam for better or worse here in Storybrooke seemed to embolden Ruby and Granny. With a plan somewhat established, they eased into things and had even started to show some signs of hope. Ruby’s visions were still unsure in regards to Liam, but her instincts weren’t as harried and afraid as they had been before, and Emma was more than glad for that.

“Sorry. I don’t mean to second-guess your abilities,” Emma said, not wanting Ruby to feel that she didn’t respect all that her new friend was capable of. “It’s just kind of a lot. Today I have to go tell my best friend she’s got magical powers. Then I have to ask her if she’s seen the future lately because there’s danger looming in a town that never really tends to see it. It’s a little…”

“Overwhelming,” Killian said at the same time that Ruby filled in with her own “totally bizarre.”

“Yeah, both of those actually,” Emma agreed, barking out something like a laugh again and leaning into Killian, pulling a little extra strength from him as they walked up the rest of the steps to Elsa and Anna’s house. Before they could knock though, the door flew open and there was Anna looking out of breath, as if she’d been sprinting around the house for some time.

“Aha! I knew Elsa’s hunch would be right. She mentioned that there might be guests today off handedly when she woke up, and then she said we didn’t have to clean because it was just a thought. That obviously wasn’t going to happen. Elsa knows what Elsa knows, right? Only problem is this place is so big it’s hard for just two of us, and I can never figure out how to vacuum the walls right. But it’s fine because you’re here now!”

Anna said all the words so quickly that Emma wondered if Killian and Ruby would need a translator. It was just like her friend to be going a hundred miles a minute. Her thoughts ran fast, and her tongue ran faster, that was what Elsa and Anna’s Grams had always said and she wasn’t wrong. But where others might have whiplash from the speed of that largely random monologue, Emma was totally comfortable with it. It was indication that things were as they always were here in her friends’ house, and though Emma was about to change that, she took it as a good sign that Anna immediately hugged her close in a welcoming gesture without even saying a traditional hello.

“I’m sorry, the walls?” Killian asked aloud, drawing Anna’s attention to him with the apt question. Emma watched as her friend’s eyes lit up, and she didn’t miss the way that Anna’s gaze flicked back between Emma and Killian a few times before she answered.

“Yeah. It’s like the one thing I’m not a complete disaster at,” Anna said, as if that was any kind of explanation, and Emma shared a look with Killian trying to convey that she would fill him in on Anna’s quirks and skill sets a little later. Meanwhile Ruby chuckled aloud, and Emma thought perhaps her gift made her privy to some of those images of Anna cleaning, which were, admittedly, always a riot.

“You’re never a disaster, Anna,” Elsa proclaimed from inside the house before she appeared at the doorway, looking much less windswept and out of breath than her sister. She also handled the presence of guests so differently, offering a smile and a more socially polite greeting to them all. “We were hoping to see you today, Emma. And you brought company! Hi Killian.”

“Good to see you, Elsa” Killian replied genuinely. Elsa’s smile grew at Killian’s honest enjoyment in seeing her and then her eyes moved to Ruby. Emma waited for a second to see if there would be any immediate recognition. Maybe Elsa had seen Ruby in a dream or something, but there was nothing past a mild friendliness there and Emma knew that for now Ruby was just any other person to her friend.

“Elsa, Anna, this is Killian’s cousin Ruby. She’s, uh, visiting?” Emma said, not meaning to have her inflection change so it sounded like a question, but Ruby went right ahead as if that introduction wasn’t weird and stilted at all.

“It’s really great to meet you two. I feel like I already know you guys.”

“Oh score, he’s got family! And where there’s family there’s like a million embarrassing stories and deets about how he’s going to treat our girl,” Anna said, again seeming to forget herself. After a moment she had the good sense to look a little bashful. “Oh shoot, did I say that out loud?”

“Yup,” Killian and Ruby responded at once, the latter seeming to have a lot more fun with this than the former, but Emma knew Killian had a soft spot for Anna and for Elsa. She’d watched over the past few weeks as he got to know her friends, and he’d said more than once that since they were Emma’s chosen family so to would they be his.

“What my sister probably meant to say is that it’s nice to meet you too,” Elsa said graciously. “And won’t you come in? I wouldn’t have bored you with the details, but since Anna already shared, we have in fact cleaned the house today.”

Everyone walked inside and Emma could almost imagine seeing this house for the first time again as Killian was (with Ruby it was doubtful, seeing as her gift had so much range and possibility). For Emma, this estate had always been one of the most gorgeous in Storybrooke. Anna and Elsa’s family had been some of the founding members of this town centuries ago, and they’d been old money from back in Europe well before that. At one time there’d even been a habit by some people of calling them the town royals, at least among their more jealous and less kind hearted neighbors, but that was before the tragic accident that took Anna and Elsa’s parents from them too soon. Still this house was a symbol of tradition and grace. It was old but still fresh and though it had gotten a little colder when they lost their parents, Elsa wouldn’t allow coldness to linger. She certainly could have, and Emma would have never faulted her friend for giving in to sadness, but for Anna, Elsa had always been strong. Part of that strength meant keeping this house alive and vibrant, and she’d managed to do that every day, no matter how hard it had been.

Looking around the ‘sun parlor’ (basically a fancy rich people word for sitting room with a full wall of glass windows), Emma noticed the subtle differences between their childhood version of this home and the one they were in now. Before, this place had been the epitome of prim and proper. It was still lovely, because it had been filled with the love of family, but Elsa’s mother had been meticulous in her desire to keep things as true to the original integrity of the old Victorian home as she could. Elsa, in comparison, had warmed things up. There were live plants strewn about because of Anna’s love of all things natural, and they were all blooming beautifully. There were also so many more pictures of their family and friends on the mantles and side tables. They were snapshots of happy memories, both long ago and also recent, but it never felt morbid or sad. It was a memorial and yet a living breathing tribute to the sisters now as well.

“This is a beautiful home you two have,” Killian said, showing his good manners and making Emma’s heart squeeze tightly. It was a simple compliment, but she knew both of her friends would take it as sincerely as it was meant.

“Thank you,” Elsa replied. “It’s a labor of love, but it’s always felt worth it to us.”

“You got that right,” Anna said sitting down after all of their guests were seated, and then, because she was hardly as patient as her sister, she got right down to the point. “So. What brings Killian’s mysterious cousin to our house? Emma’s got that look about her like she’s got to say something, so I’m betting it’s a doozy.”

Emma’s stomach flipped at Anna’s perceptiveness, though she should have known this would come. She was wondering what would be the best way to proceed. Emma and Ruby definitely needed to be here, as did Anna and Elsa, but though Emma would love the comfort of having Killian by her side in what could be a trying time, she wanted to make sure all parties were comfortable. This was a huge reveal to Elsa and to Anna, and though Emma knew that they loved Killian because she cared so much for him, she didn’t want anything to feel forced. As if he read her mind – whether through the mating link or through his own well-honed Emma radar – Killian squeezed her hand gently and brought it to his lips to press a gentle kiss. Then he announced his intention as their eyes still held.

“I think it might be best if I take a look around the gardens, maybe scope out this sea walk I’ve heard so much about. Would either of you mind?” Killian asked, finally turning to Emma’s friends, but they just smiled and nodded that it was fine, both of them clearly thrilled at his open affection for Emma. “I’ll be right outside should you need me, love.”

“Thank you,” Emma whispered to him before pressing a kiss to his lips and watching him slip out the door to the patio. Killian headed towards the gardens, a place where one could get lost for hours, but she was sure he wouldn’t get turned around. As a shifter, it was one of his many gifts to have that all too keen sense of direction.

“Okay that’s not fair,” Anna exclaimed, her head shaking and the braids she had in this morning following suit. “I mean seriously that man is just crazy about you. I want one!”

Emma laughed at Anna’s outburst and so did Ruby, and the slight tension that had arisen felt like it dwindled considerably. Still Emma could see that her friend, though honest, was also doing this on purpose. It might be Elsa who was a once in a generation witch, but now that Emma knew of magic and of the magic that ran in this family, she was absolutely certain Anna had gifts of her own. Perhaps they were more hidden or subdued, but they were definitely there. Elsa had always been the one with dreams that were uncannily accurate, but Anna had a way of knowing people and situations just like this one.

“Not to worry, Anna. You’ll definitely find someone,” Ruby said and though it could have been construed as a harmless comment, Anna’s eyebrows rose and her smile widened.

“Oh my gosh, you see stuff too don’t you?!” Anna exclaimed, practically squealing. “I know you do! That’s the same face Elsa makes when she has a dream. Now you have to tell us what the hell is going on!”

“You good with that, Emma?” Ruby asked and Emma nodded, moving to sit with Elsa and Anna on the couch as Ruby told them all that she knew.

Though Emma had heard most of this already, it was another experience entirely to have this conversation with Elsa and Anna present. Ruby was giving a basic 101 run down of magic and the supernatural world. Since humanity itself was formed, so to had magic been living and breathing on this earth. Many people in the know considered magic to be another of the elements that people were more familiar with. It was an essence and an energy that always came from nature somehow, but it manifested in many ways. Sometimes it took the form of witches or clairvoyants, and other times it could be seen in other supernatural beings. Ruby hadn’t mentioned shifters specifically yet, focusing instead on what was truly pertinent to Elsa and Anna, but Emma felt completely compelled by what they discovered too. It was still so new and so amazing that conceiving all of this could be real was a challenge.

The element of magic, it turned out, was all around to those who know how to wield it. For witches and warlocks and other spell-casting peoples, magic was a gift mostly held by families that originated from different hubs of magical influence. Long ago there were places on earth where magic was far more present than others. Ruby listed a few off the cuff: portions of the Amazon, oases in the Sahara, islands off of current day Malaysia and more. As such, the people who came from those areas were exposed to a very rich natural spirit for millennia. That spirit was then internalized by more sensitive families, and then, even if they left, the gift of magical ability was transferred with them.

“My family was from Ireland originally,” Ruby explained, drawing a pendant that she had that didn’t look so dissimilar from the one of Killian’s that Emma had found. As she did so, a breeze swept through the room but it was contained, gentle, warm, and well… wonderful. It smelled sweet, like the fresh bloom of wild flowers, and as Emma looked at the light swirling in the room, she could see these sort of spiritual etchings dancing in the wind of feathers, leaves, and, as one might expect with the scent, petals. “It was just a tiny Celtic town to the south of the Isle, but according to the diaries that all of the women in my family kept, there was a spring there where magic flowed freely. It was their job to protect the spring, but eventually it dried up and so they moved here.”

“This is… it’s impossible. But it’s real,” Elsa said, her fingertips trying to trace some of Ruby’s magic as it flittered through the air. As she toyed with the magic in the air, her whole being was overcome with an undeniable excitement. There wasn’t any trace of the fear she expected. If anything Elsa looked totally free to believe in something amazing and all consuming. “Magic has been real along. Just like Grams always said. I thought she was teasing, or maybe giving us something beautiful to dream of. I never thought… but it’s always been here. I can feel it now.”

“It has,” Ruby replied, her own joy at seeing Elsa experience this growing more and more by the second.

“You said the spring dried up?” Anna asked, continuing the trend that had emerged of her being the one to ask questions that all of them were thinking. “Did something happen?”

“No, it was just nature taking its course,” Ruby said, pulling back her magical display so the room was as it had been. “It was a couple hundred years ago, and then they came here, or rather, to America, hoping to find a new place to call home. The witches in my family bounced around a little bit before moving further out west. Magic loves forests and the untouched spaces of nature, and as the world has changed, so too have the places that magic likes best.”

“Can wi- wi…” Elsa faltered over the words, still clearly grappling with the new information she was hearing about herself. “Can people who access magic turn into animals by any chance? Like maybe wolves?”

“Let me guess, lots of wolf dreams have been happening since Killian came?” Ruby asked, feeling like she already knew the answer.

“Yes,” Elsa hedged. “But they’ve been around a long time. Since that day in Boston…” Elsa looked to Emma and now, finally, Emma felt like she could jump in for a bit.

“The wolves from that night are more than I ever thought they were. They are not animals, but magical people who can transform their shape. They’re called shifters,” Emma explained. “Not all shifters are wolves, but that night when I was attacked it was a rogue wolf who came after me and another rogue wolf who saved me.”

“You were attacked?!” Anna exclaimed, somehow more worried about that than the fact that Emma was telling her that people could turn into giant animals or that witchcraft was real. “And you knew, Elsa?”

“I’m sorry, Anna, I should have told you but…”

“But I made her promise not to,” Emma said, explaining the story as quickly as she could and filling in on how Elsa had been there. She’d had a dream that brought her to the city, but for a long long time they’d all just considered it this mental break. It couldn’t have been real, but now they knew it truly was. “But what I didn’t realize then is that the shifter was Killian.”

“Holy shit, your Killian?!” Anna asked, completely losing herself in the reveal before looking to Ruby. “Killian’s a wolf? That’s so awesome! So are you a wolf too then? I thought you were a witch.”

“Guilty on both counts,” Ruby said with a grin. “It’s very rare, but witches and shifters can be mates and when they are you end up with hybrids like me.”

“Oh my God mates, that sounds so… hot!” Anna said, play fanning herself as she heard. Emma couldn’t help but let out a laugh at her friend’s antics, but she continued to search Anna’s demeanor to see if she was really okay with all she was finding out or if there was more to this. Anna seemed so completely on board, and Emma wondered how that could be.

“But you said the wolf that saved you, sorry, Killian, you said he was all black right? Like midnight. And the attacker was more tan?”

“Yeah. Like a dull colored sand, why?”

“The one I’ve been dreaming of is lighter than just a pure black,” Elsa said, her confusion clearly gnawing at her.

“Let me guess, dark gray coat, that gets darker at the paws.”

“Yes,” Elsa said, her desire to know who it was winning out. “You know him?”

“It’s Liam,” Ruby confessed, and then, realizing that neither Elsa nor Anna recognized the name, she filled them in. “Killian’s brother.”

“Oh my God, so Elsa is dreaming about Killian’s brother?” Anna asked, looking almost giddy. “Wait that’s a good thing right?”

“It’s complicated,” Ruby said, deflating Anna somewhat, though Elsa seemed to already know that was the case. “And honestly, that part of all of this can wait a while longer. I think you guys will face enough today just hearing your story.”

“So you know about us then,” Elsa asked without the inflection of a real question. “You’re going to tell us about our family?”

“There’s no need for that. They can tell you themselves.”

Silence greeted Ruby’s statement, and it was one of the first times that Emma had ever seen Anna stunned into quiet like this. The pain in her friend’s eyes was mingled with a soul crushing hope, and Emma could understand it. Ruby hadn’t given her too many details, but from what she had said every old family of magic had a repository somewhere with stories and spells and all other kinds of things. It was passed down from generation to generation, and Emma assumed it would be like in the movies where there was a giant book written kind of like a diary.

“How?” Elsa asked, her voice coming out stronger than Emma would have ever imagined as she took Anna’s hand and squeezed it tight and then used her other hand to hold onto Emma.

“There’s a room in this house that no one knows about. There’s a hidden door. That’s where the answers are.”

“A hidden door?” Elsa asked, confused. “We don’t have anything like that. If we did we’d have found it by now.”

“One of you has,” Ruby said, looking to Anna with a soft smile. “You just haven’t remembered in a long time.”

At the words a spark of recollection appeared in Anna’s expression, and Emma knew her friend was working through the recesses of her mind trying to figure out exactly when that happened and where she’d found it. After a moment her eyes lit up and she jumped from the couch.

“It’s out back in the green house. But there was nothing there. Just a bunch of old herbs and dried up plants…”

“There’s a hatch door to a lower level somewhere. It won’t take long for you to find it. I can’t see what’s down there – there are blood protection spells meaning only your family can access that space, but there should be a box there. It’s blue and has your family crest. Inside there are jewels, crystals, and precious stones. They’ll tell the story if you two unlock them.”

“I’m sorry, so the stones are going to… talk to us?” Elsa asked.

“You’ll see,” Ruby said, offering a smile as Anna jumped up.

“We have to go,” Anna said, reaching back for Elsa’s hand. “We have to go right now.”

“All right, all right,” Elsa said, still not looking like she fully believed it. “Emma?”

“I think it would be best if you two did this yourselves,” Emma said, trying to hold back tears as she came to stand up with her friends.

“But you’re our sister, too” Anna said, immediately agreeing with Elsa and Emma swallowed back a lump in her throat.

“Always have been and always will be. But this… it’s your legacy and it’s a part of you guys that I think deserves the utmost care. Plus we don’t know how this blood spell thing works yet. I might not be able to go in at all. But I’ll be right here if you need me. I’m not going anywhere.”

“Promise?” Anna and Elsa asked at the same time, and Emma nodded, extending her pinky to them both and twisting tightly when they extended theirs.

“Promise.”

With that, Elsa and Anna headed out to the green house, leaving Ruby and Emma alone for pretty much the first time since Granny and Ruby arrived. It should have been a strange or awkward time, but Emma found it comfortable despite the circumstances. She and Ruby discussed a number of things about magic and about what her friends would find. They were going to be blessed today, not just with their story, but with their story told by their mother and their grandmother. Ruby might not be able to see the story, but she could feel those spirits being close. Ruby explained that it was possible to infuse sound and images into precious gems, and she had a few from her family that had always meant a lot to her. But at one point, after a bit of time discussing this new life changing moment for her friends, Killian caught Emma’s attention. He was outside and in wolf form along the tree line, looking back at the house, or more precisely at her.

“I’ve never seen Killian like this before, so happy and centered,” Ruby mused aloud, her eyes looking towards Killian as she smiled with pride and real joy. “Even when we were kids and his Mom was still here, he was always quiet and always just a little more reserved than me or the other pack pups.”

“I can’t imagine what it must have been like, growing up the way he and Liam did. The way you did, in that pack run by their father. Was it hard when they left?”

“Almost as hard as losing Liam,” Ruby confessed, her expression turning somber and remorseful. Emma wondered if Killian could hear them, but at this distance she thought it was probably doubtful. “But we have the future. I’m afraid to say anything for certain, but it doesn’t feel as menacing right now as it did before. I was panicked when I could sense Liam again, but I still see things. Good things. Things happening years down the way. I have to believe they’ll really happen. You’re going to make them happen.”

“Me?” Emma asked, shocked that she would have any sort of role. “But I’m just a human.”

“Maybe,” Ruby said, not sounding fully convinced, “But even if you’re human, Emma, you’re special. You bring out the best in Killian. You mean the world to Anna and Elsa. You have a light in you. It’s not magic per se, at least I don’t think, but it’s something, and I know it’s important. It might just be the most important thing any of us has to offer.”

Emma thanked Ruby quietly, flattered at the compliment, but unable to respond in any meaningful way because at that precise moment her phone began to ring. She’d been so unplugged for days that Emma was surprised she’d even brought it with her, but the tell tale sign of her mother’s ring tone told Emma that patience had finally run thin for Mary Margaret Nolan. Strangely that was of huge comfort to Emma, and before she so much as greeted her mother, she had a pretty good idea of where this conversation was going to go.

“Hi Mom,” Emma said, thinking about what the proper tactic was for this exchange.

In a regular situation she would apologize for being off the grid. It had been days since she spoke with anyone in her family, and that was not normal for them. But she wasn’t actually sorry for all that had happened the past few days, and Emma also knew that though her mother always meant well, she had a real knack for taking harmless statements and making them a little more innuendo packed than was strictly comfortable.

“Oh Emma, honey, you know I love you, and God knows I love Anna and Elsa nearly as much, but would it be too much for you to call your parents when finally surfacing after days and days away? We miss you.”

“I miss you too, Mom. And sorry about the delay. Things are kind of happening over here. It’s, uh, unexpected.”

“Well surprise guests will do that to you.”

“How did you know about that?” Emma asked, slightly afraid that her mother was going to rehash some truly crazy series of informants, but what she actually heard surprised her even more.

“Easy, I’m having lunch with Granny right now.”

“You’re what?!” Emma asked at the same time Ruby said, “She’s what?!” Well, look at that, even a surprise for the all-seeing Ruby. For a second Emma wondered how she’d heard what her mother said on the phone, and then she remembered Ruby had shifter hearing. She was going to have to get used to that.

“I know! It’s the wildest thing. We just happened to meet at the diner – she was questioning the integrity of the lasagna after ordering it, a good indicator of a person’s character as you know - and we got to talking.” Emma smiled at one of her mother’s strange marks of a person, but it wasn’t the first time she’d heard this bit about the lasagna. “I can’t imagine how you must be feeling, Emma. First you find out your true love is a shifter and then you find out your best friends have a magical bloodline -,”

“Mom!” Emma yelled into the phone interrupting her. “You can’t go around saying things like that. Someone could hear you.”

“Emma, I’m at home,” her mother said in a slightly chastising voice, surprising Emma yet again. “Do you really think I’d be so careless? Besides, I can keep a secret you know.”

If someone had said that to Emma even a month ago she would laugh in their face. Mary Margaret Nolan keeping a secret? Yeah right. It was not her style, but that assumption had been proved wrong. She’d kept mum about shifters for years, and in doing so she’d proven that it was possible for her to not give away a private confidence. “I thought you said you were having lunch at the diner.”

“No, I said we met at the diner. I ended up convincing her to come here. Because again, that lasagna is questionable at best. She’s a funny one though, won’t let me call her anything but Granny. But I like her.”

“You realize she’s a shifter too, right? She can hear you.”

“She could hear me if she were human; she’s sitting right in front of me.”

Emma heard Granny say hello in the background and at the same time Ruby came closer and said hello herself. This could have started a whole big conversation, since her mother was clearly curious about Killian’s cousin, but Emma redirected to get some better answers.

“So did you know about Anna and Elsa all this time too?” Emma asked, hating to think this might have been yet another secret between she and her parents. Before they died, Elsa and Anna’s mother and father were good friends of Emma’s parents. But it would be a little strange that they would tell them and not their children about their family legacy.

“Oh no, honey, Granny told me. Gigi never confided in me about any of that, not that I’d ever blame her after the incident where I accidentally told you girls her real name.”

Emma felt a giggle bubble up at that memory. Yes she remembered that day. It wasn’t every day you heard the name ‘Gerda,’ and Anna and Elsa had gone bonkers over the big reveal. They’d been fixated on it for weeks, months even.

“I’m sure Gigi had all sorts of plans for how she wanted Anna and Elsa to hear all of this,” Mary Margaret said, her voice sounding out with more than a touch of sadness for her old friend. “But things happen that we can’t control. And I’m just glad that the girls are getting the chance to learn who they really are now. And it’s so amazing! I knew about shifters – your father told me that you know everything now so you know how that went – but magic… well it’s just so exciting, don’t you think?”

“Yeah,” Emma said, letting out a steady breath. “Exciting would be a good word to describe the last few days.”

“Exactly, and with so much going on and so much left to talk about, I think it’s only right that everyone come to the house for dinner. I have to meet Ruby, and I want to check in on Elsa and Anna, but most of all I want to make sure my new son-in-law knows what’s what.”

“Mom,” Emma said with a blush growing over her cheeks before lowering her voice as quietly as she could while still being heard on the other end of the call. “We’re not married.”

“Ha! Maybe not yet, but don’t think a wedding is not already in the works. This mating thing sounds lovely. Your Aunt Gwen told me a bit about it a few years back. It’s like this great big love that means more than any simple ceremony can ever express, but every princess deserves a wedding and you’re darn well going to have one.”

Emma didn’t even have time to groan before Killian approached, stepping into view at the patio door with an intense look in his blue eyes. “I couldn’t agree more.”

Well this was fun. Apparently he could hear her phone calls and from quite a bit of distance away. Emma was doing all she could to not die of embarrassment, but the only thing getting her through was the look on Killian’s face that said he truly did love her and was planning for forever together. It wasn’t like her mother had picked this idea out of nowhere. Clearly Killian felt the same about them getting married, even if they hadn’t gotten there yet.

“Okay well can we table that talk for now, please? There’s more than enough to keep us busy in the meantime,” Emma begged, not wanting to state the obvious aloud – there should be no wedding being planned since Killian hadn’t exactly asked her to get married.

“Absolutely, but we will see you all at seven. Pass on the invite to Anna and Elsa.”

“Tonight?” Emma asked, wondering if it was a good idea. “I don’t know, Mom. They just found everything out, they might need some time -,”

“We don’t need time,” Anna said, drawing everyone’s attention to the doorway where she and Elsa were standing. The sisters were holding hands again, and it was clear there had been some tears shed as they went through their family’s things, but both of them still looked happy. Emma imagined there must be so much relief even though there was the sadness of looking to the past, and with a silent nod between her and Elsa, her friend conveyed that to her as Anna continued. “What we need is some really good chicken parm. I’m talking pasta for days, the good imported cheese your Mom gets in Boston, and that home made sauce even magic couldn’t replicate.”

Everyone laughed at that, and since Emma had automatically put the call on speakerphone when Anna and Elsa came out, her mother took the initiative and replied herself. She had all of those ingredients, and she would see to it that Anna and Elsa’s favorite meal was made and ready. With that, Emma hung up on the call, and she looked first to Killian, finding his eyes shining with so much love. She held onto that, and then looked quickly to Elsa, needing to know that her friend was all right.

“Are you sure this is okay? It’s a lot to reconcile and it’s all happening very fast.”

“Fast is the way things move these days,” Elsa said with a smile that was small but also true. She looked at Emma and at Killian, nodding whether she consciously knew it or not. “And so far that seems to be a good thing. We’re not different people because of what we know now. I’m no different than I was before.”

“No, you’re not,” Emma said gladly, watching Elsa exhale a ragged breath as Ruby chimed in.

“You’ve just got some cool new abilities,” Ruby said cheerily. “And now that you guys unlocked your family secrets I can see so much more, for you and for Anna.”

“You too?” Emma asked, finding herself filled with excitement for her friend. For once Anna looked a little sheepish, something Emma had never noticed her friend experiencing before, but she acknowledged the unexpected surprise.

“Yup. Visions might not be my thing, but according to Grams messages and some of Mom’s too there’s a lot in store for me as well. But for now let’s put all of that on ice. I wasn’t kidding when I said I needed that chicken parm, because honey, it has been a day.”

Everyone could readily agree with that assessment, and in the interest of honoring her friends’ wishes, Emma held back on questions about what came next and what they had learned. Soon enough her friends would tell her. It was always just a matter of time before they shared everything with each other, and whenever that came Emma would be more than willing to listen and learn.

“How are you doing, love?” Killian asked a few moments later, when they’d all decided to head outside together to the beach walk. Elsa and Anna were talking with Ruby about summers in Storybrooke, and Emma watched at how a solid friendship was forming between them already, her heart filled with happiness as her family and Killian’s blended together.

“I’m good,” Emma said, looking to Killian and seeing his concern and affection, shining as brightly as the sun in the sky this lovely summer day. “Better with you here.”

“I feel I could say that in any moment,” Killian agreed, stopping their stroll and pulling her into his embrace. “Any instance is improved with you beside me.”

“Guess we better stick together then,” Emma teased and she delighted in the growl from Killian as his mouth claimed hers in a fierce and hungry kiss. It was impossible not to get swept away in it, her hands roaming, her body arching for closeness as she tasted him and reveled in the heat and charge between them. But before they could take things way too far given their setting, Killian pulled back and pressed his forehead to hers gently.

“Forever, Emma. That’s how long we’ll have each other.”

“Forever,” she agreed.

With that, the two of them rejoined her friends and Ruby, finding themselves enjoying a weirdly normal afternoon in the midst of so much change and transformation. And though Emma was a bit preoccupied with the idea of dinner at her parents tonight, she knew, deep down, that whatever may come she would always have Killian, and the two of them together would always make it through.

Post-Note: So there we have it. Truth be told I have SO many thoughts and ideas about Elsa and Anna’s magical reveal. I would love to write a whole scene from their POV about that, adding the layers of magic I have imagined for this story and giving their experience with the big change in their lives. Unfortunately I don’t really have time to create that chapter, at least not yet. I am debating, however, adding some extra scenes and glimpses into this story when I have the whole thing done. That being said, I have only managed to get a couple of chapters written before my school year, so it’s looking like it’s definitely going to be summer before this whole story is told. As of right now I am looking to move to a monthly posting schedule. I have this chapter, one for February and one for March all written, and I am hoping I might find a bit of time in the next three months to craft together a chapter for April, God willing. Anyway, I would love to hear what you all think, and rest assured there will be some more CS moments in the chapter next time. There’s still a lot of stuff that has to happen, so we aren’t getting full blown fluff for a while, but I trust you guys will still like the story all the same. Thanks so much for reading and hope you have a great rest of your weekend!

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