#im not a very great artist at All but. IM TRYING i rly am

[leave-your-body]

2, 6, and 16 for the art asks!!!

HIIII FISH :)) :) :)))

2. 5 favs of yr work

ohhhh thats. thats such a tricky one cuz i almost never do full, finished pieces, its always just sketches..

if i had to choose, probably these.. but again i dont rly have a lot to choose from haha. the watercolour one is the first time i properly worked with it outside of school, for context. also idk why the hell the photo is so crunchy mb.AND! the green one had a ref from pinterest

+the fifth one is charlottes character sheet, which is probably the best thing ive ever made TBH.. but im not gonna reveal that yet ^_^

6. which artists inspire u rn?

HGHGHGH. ive never thought about this actually. i think inspiration doesnt really come from the art itself for me, but the artists attitude About art. anyone that fucks around and does whatever they want and really puts their genuine selves on the page is hella inspiring to me no matter what their art looks like, and it motivates me to do better

16. whats the most daunting part of yr process?

hmm. that awkward stage between having the composition and basic sketch laid out -> actually drawing is real stressful lmao.i never know what exactly to do... should i clean up the sketch? is it better to just redraw it completely? should this be cleaner? how do i even make it cleaner.... etc

ask game

[superdeluxeaverage]

I thimk megalopolis was one of the most shitass movies ive ever seen but im glad i saw it in theatres and am gonna see it again with my sister thursday like the best way to describe it would be that it feels like a bad adapatation of a book that doesnt exist there was so much straight up stupid moments in it it felt like unreal spoilers if any1 even gives a shit

Theres this scene where adam drivers gets shot but his face heals with the power of the megalon and he has his face in wraps and when he takes his wraps off and reveals his healing face it plays THE most generic indian and tabla musical cue that in no way matches with the rest of the soundtrack and puts this fucking snapchat ass filter where theres like doubles of him behind him to his left and right infinitely going abd i was like is this fuckinh chowder or some shit. Ill never say the movie was good tho cause theres something i see no one talking abt atleast on letterboxd presumably cause they love deepthroating autuer dick so much even (or especially) when they kno the auteur in question is a creep but there was this weird subplot where there was this pop star with a like "virgin teen" image and they leaked a sex tape of her and the main character so the main character was arrested for being a pedophile but then it was immediately after revealed that the tape was faked (?) (They never say how they just say it was faked) and that the pop star was actually not from america abd was in her 20s. This whole subplot is obv coppola trying to exonerate all his sex offender best friends and its such a gross kneejerk response like why say the tape was fake but then also say oh shes a bad person dishonest liar too lol. Then when its showing news reports of it it cuts to her lile having changed her image to a like pop punk image and making more sexually suggestive music instead of conservative clean music like b4 so its supposed to be like she just moved onto the next image unfazed cause shes a liar its such a cringe subplot and it happens in the span of like 15 mins and is never mentioned again and very clearly is just supposed to be a rebuttal to accusations and scandals sooo fkn embarrassing especially given the fact hes been trying to get this movie made his whole life LOL the two (yes 2) other women in the movie are also treated super sexistly like the main characters love interest has no personality aside from always standing behind her mans artistic vision and passion and "completing" him then the aubrey plaza character is just supposed to be the sexy woman who sleeps with any1 for power like coppola def most sexist guy alive ever the fact he made that movie dedicated it to his wife at the end yup this man is going to hell. Probably the hardest movie to talk abt cause its not u kno deserving of praise the only frame of reference is camp rly like in that same ballpark not so bad its good but just a very wtf type of movie. Im also scared cause shia labeouf was in this doing a type of scary dennis hopper character (coppola even saying working with him reminded him of hopper) and obv this film flopped and is not gonna make any1 famous since even the acting was p bad from every1 or just v disconnected and unrelatable on a human level but watching this has me worried that labeouf is gonna thrive with piece of shit directors by using the dennis hopper/klaus kinski method of having ppl praise ur "energy" when its just that u only take roles where u play sadistic fucks cause ur a sadistic abusive fuck so ppl get convinced ur a great actor when ur not even acting.

[kerizaret]

im the mutual in law anon from yesterday again :3 if you want to tag me with an emoji u can tag me with 🎹! it's one of my favorite instruments to listen to even tho i don't play much anymore

i'm glad my words resonated with you! (shiho refe- [i am dragged off the stage]) i don't like blueberries the fruit for texture reasons but in muffins they're AMAZING so i'm glad you took it as much of a high compliment as i meant it :D

i have synthesasia so i assign things smells or tastes a lot :o generally people don't take it as well as you lol even if i tell them it's a compliment sgdjdhdjdh but i'm glad you understood!! another fun synthesasia thing: your blog in general smells like earl grey tea :3

wow this ask is long sorry!!!! i hope u have a great day and remember to drink water :DDD

Yay hi again!!! ヽ(*´▽)ノ♪

I always admire anyone who even played piano jyst for a while, it always looked so Hard to me but it sounds soo pretty! Also I struggle with reading musical notes too much ahdhsh. It rly is so good to listen to

Also :00 that's so interesting, I always imagined what that'd feel like to associate things with smells and tastes so strongly. It's fascinating to me if anything, i don't see why I would take it weirdly!! It's so fun too! And also I got assigned super tasty things to that's even more awesome :3 i do love earl grey too tho it's not my tea of first choice ^^

Also I'm an artist, in this circle people tell each other "your art tastes like [thing] i am EATING it" ALL the time AHDHA atp it's the highest form of compliments 😭😭 /silly it's a very normal thing to say

Hope your day is going well too!! Thank you for the ask :3 I'm drinking tea rn and will try to stay hydrated 🫡

[matoitech]

How do you come up with super pretty design and fur patterns??

ooo this is such an open ended question theres a lot i could say ill ramble more abt more technical n specific tips under the cut, but honestly my biggest tip would just be to like, look at so much fucking furry art. looking thru other ppls art n character design is both rly fun and literally studying for ur own work. i mean id recommend looking at char design both furry and not furry in general cuz its all useful stuff and rly good to get like a diverse variety of shit to live in ur brain u can take out as insp or little things here n there for ideas for ur own design when its useful. looking at actual animals of all types and species is also useful, lots of cool patterns u can find that way and for some design in particular i will primarily be using markings similar to actual animals ive seen (at least like for example the concept of a darker mask of fur that goes under the eyes a certain way, etc). canines and felines in particular have a very very wide variety of markings u can use as inspiration. other animals too but those tend to be popular w furry art n design n r some favorites for me personally lol

for me its like, a lot of practice to get good at furry art and furry character design specifically, like pretty conscious effort since i was a kid cuz thats what i was interested in and those were the artists i admired and found as big inspiration and wanted to draw like. and ofc i am still trying to improve n learn more myself! so id say to start like.. a lot of practice, ofc looking at actual animal markings cuz u can get a LOT of good ideas that way, and big time: studying other ppls art and character design. u r never looking at other ppls art Too Much u r learning when u r having fun doing that

looking at a wide variety of dif furry styles w furry design in particular is pretty useful, especially when theyre all made for dif purposes; fursuit design vs designs for comics vs furry adoptable designs vs designs created to be animated (’animator friendly’ designs), to name a few, all r serving dif purposes n have dif goals n dif reasons for why they look the way they do.

on a more technical level of How i come up w them/make them, i sat w this one for a bit n here r some ideas i wrote down. i was trying not 2 ramble but u asked the autistic guy who is very interested in and passionate abt furry art n character design so <3 many thoiughtz under the cut so its not massively long

first is that i fuck around a LOT before i settle on smth. slap colors on shit and take colors off. if ur drawing digitally and u have a program w a filter -> color adjustments option like sai 2 u can mess w hues n saturation to get combos u never wouldve thought of without that bonus help. i tend to start working on colors/markings w digital (while i may do preleminary traditional sketches of what the character could look like before colors) cuz its way easier to test smth out and then undo it if u dont like it on digital lol. and even w how i tend to try many dif things i test around before i decide on smth i like, i always keep open the possibility that this design (if im using it as an oc) is open to being changed in the future if i find smth i like more w them

getting attached to pieces of a design and wanting to build around that is great cuz its how u figure out what u like and what is important to u w this design/character, but whats also important is being able to recognize when smth just isnt working (at least the Way ur approaching it, or maybe the character ur trying it with, etc) and u need to try a different track. u can always keep that trait u rly like and want to put on a character and just rework it into a dif design later, i do that all the time! just be content with some designs maybe just taking more time to come together and thats cool too, u need time to stew on ur thoughts n try things in ur brain b4 u test them in actual art sometimes (i mean, for me at least). sometimes u just need to sit on a character design for a while and try a lot of things before smth Clicks. at least for me! sometimes its very easy to design a character and figure out markings n stuff but other times it takes me a lot of attempts and building up a design w new ideas i am getting along the way. maybe i realize this particular design trait is cool but just isnt working on this character/design so i file it away on the backburner to test on a new character later till i find a design (or oc if i RLY like it and want to draw it a lot) who it DOES fit. 

i have a pretty big stock of inspiration n ideas i have in my brain bcuz i have been autistically obsessed w furry art and improving at my own since i was a kid so i just have a lot of Interest in this stuff and have a very big like.. amnt of shit to draw from i think? again, padding out what u have to draw from in ur brain in the first place. u could also save character design insp somewhere and look thru it before u start working on a design urself, i do that sometimes! it gets the creative juices flowing for me to look at art i admire and feel inspired by before i work on my own. do stuff to get urself inspired or ur brain working in that direction, whatever way that works for u, u know urself best w it

i often keep notes of little ideas i have or things i want to try so i can try making a character design around it later, i have always loved making characters and character design so i dont rly have problems w lack of ideas or anything, its smth u just work on and if its fun u keep working on it! as a kid id do stuff like, just look thru lists of animals and then just make a bunch of furry designs for those animals, or do stuff like assign colors or plants or elements or whatever animals and then make Furry Versions of those. that was entertaining to me and how i had fun. this kinda stuff is still good practice (emoji randomizers r fun to make character design from, for example). 

when im stumped w my own design or looking for new ideas to try that may click better, or when i just need a break cuz i definitely am not drawing all the time, i take a break from drawing and go back to looking at lots of art, aka, STUDYING <3 read comics, watch movies, etc too, whatever ur interested in and inspired by. i think a lot abt my own designs n ocs n stuff i want to draw and ideas i might use or like (or things i dont care for or am that interested in that i think ‘how can i implement that in a way that i DO like in my own design, how can i make this become interesting to me’) while im like, just living my life and seeing outfits and seeing palettes and seeing other ppls work n stuff, not JUST when im drawing. im playing around w ideas in my head before i actually draw, this is smth u probably improve on with just like, time and practice and gaining the ability to gauge if smth is worth trying before u actually draw it. again i cannot stress enough how important looking at a lot of other character design is; both what u like and what u dont like is going to be internalized and is going to be rly useful for making ur own designs. look at a lot of different art styles, look at how other ppl design characters. know that character design is something u can absolutely improve on, its not like, a talent some ppl have and some ppl dont, some ppl just r going to be more passionate abt it and WANT to spend more time on it and improve Because of that. 

back to colors! the good thing is palettes (and well everything else abt designs) r super dependant on what u personally enjoy so theres not rly right or wrong ways to do them. liek if someone asked me for tips on how i personally often create palettes for characters Right Now i could think abt it and try to pick up patterns w my own art and then explain my like thought process abt it to ppl, but thats just what i personally like doing right at this moment, and that changes! u have a lot of room to just have fun. rly look at character designs n palettes that r RLY speaking to u and figure out whats working abt it for u or how u can incorporate how much u love how that artist uses colors n palettes n what theyre Doing there to make it work into ur own work. fun studying!

now a more personal one: typically (not as a general rule but often) my oc design is built to be drawn repeatedly and not be overwhelmingly complex to me.  the goal is to get smth that looks good and interesting without actually being difficult for me cuz i know myself and know i wont draw a character thats too complicated for me lol whether id get bored or intimidated by the idea of just having to draw a whole complicated fuckin thing when i just want to doodle. for me, this means i tend to pull a lot of character design tips i learned from animation. ‘animator friendly’ kinda stuff, BUT i can typically afford to be a little more complex bcuz im not animating them. im not sure if this is still common but when i was growing up ‘good furry designs’ at least w the artists and other kids i was hanging around were often considered what was the most complex and cool looking over what was actually like, replicatable and feasible to draw consistently without spending a lot of time coloring. stuff that would make having to draw that oc for someone in a commission a complete fucking pain, but sure looks cool as a finished product so u Get why ppl go for those. but personally while i like seeing those designs i know myself and probably wouldnt buy one of those adoptables for that, cuz i know i woldnt draw it enough lol. i enjoy em and can draw some for art fight but as my own oc’s they probably wouldn’t like.. fit my own needs? i may have a much easier time drawing them now bcuz i have drawn furry art and furry character design for a long time so i can figure out what im looking at easier, but it probably wouldve overwhelmed me quite a bit when i got started (been too long for me to remember lol). and thats good to know, its good to be aware of what u want to be drawing and figuring out what kinda stuff YOU like. 

adding on from above but that paragraph got long: of course having designs that r rly complex is a lot of fun n stuff im not saying dont do that im saying for ME personally a lot of my oc design tends to be centered around ‘what do i know /i/ will be capable of drawing multiple times without getting either overwhelmed or bored’. so thats a thought for me w my own designs. i also often make designs that i plan on using for like comics or smth later so i do want the design to not be terribly hard to reproduce if im planning on ‘this character is gonna be showing up quite a bit and i dont want to put a ton of work into every panel’

i will also say that like personally while markings r definitely important i DO try to mix design traits thru a more Character Design lense with a Furry Character Design lense. what i mean by that is its good to expand ur Character Design ability in general by paying attention to drawing differing body types and proportions, face shapes and like cheek/chin/etc shapes/fluff, nose and eye shapes, hair style and hair texture, etc. furry adoptables focus on creative and interesting markings on a base to make the character stand out from other wolf guys. which is also very useful to be studying and getting inspiration from for sure! i enjoy those often complex designs for sure. but for me personally i do try to take the approach of diversifying w designs (particularly w my own ocs), cuz its fun and cuz its pretty necessary when ur talking abt like, Character Design.  even as someone who often puts a lot of design traits i Know i like onto many of my ocs (mohawks <3 muscles <3 etc) like w character design its important that ur characters would not all look completely the same if they switched clothes or palettes or hairstyles yk? even when putting ‘buff’ onto multiple chars of urs cuz u just like that and drawing muscles theres many ways to make a character muscular on a lot of dif body types and proportions, for example. and while there r parts of the making these characters all look different that may b harder w furry character design (like u got all these wolves and now u gotta figure out how they all look different beyond just colors!!) its definitely still like, Necessary to me personally! i assume u were asking more abt like fur patterns rather than this kinda stuff but i would recommend u think abt that when designing characters as well, its fun and it will definitely improve ur own work in general! and it is rly necessary to practice things like a wide range of body types and hair textures n styles. it will make u a better artist overall.

look at tips from ppl who do professional character design, whether its furry artists or ppl who work with dif types of media (movies, tv, comics, video games, etc). a wider knowledge base never hurts! i have always rly personally valued tips from ppl working in the animation industry so i think thats like one of the primary ‘tutorials’ i paid more attention to and integrating from +as well as my history as a furry artist and what furry artists tend to like and consider ‘good’ character design. it just tkes a lot of fucking around n building up stuff u can draw from. and ur taste will probably change with time and as u improve. theres a place for everything and ur eyes will get better at figuring out what looks good paired together, to u, over time. u can also get great ideas n tips n inspiration from artists of all sorts of skill levels of course! 

anyway i hope this helps at all or answers ur question in some capacity, im sure theres stuff i missed but theres a lot of Words here but thats cuz i dont like.. think abt this stuff very consciously so it sounds more complicated when u write it out vs just doing it, which starts feeling more like second nature when u improve at it. i rly appreciate the compliment btw im always flattered to hear ppl like my designs! 

[thequibblah]

hi so i'm looking for some new music to listen to and i thought you could help because you have great taste!

if this helps, i'll tell you what i normally listen to, which is very basic & basically the same few artists over and over lol

- mostly just taylor swift, she makes up 70+% of my listening probably haha and if i had to pick a favorite genre of hers it would be the folkmore style

- some other pop, like olivia rodrigo and conan gray and lorde & some doja cat but i'm not a huge fan of doja's lyrics

- lyrics are really big for me, so is having a pretty voice and nice melodies

- i love your playlists but the old songs are usually not my style (there's been some though that i really like, ty for that !! <3)

- ceremonials is my favorite florence album

- liability is my favorite lorde song

no problem if u don't want to!

OH i basically recommend things for a living so why not music, eh?

so. what i'm getting from this is that you have three big listening buckets: soft acoustic and indie pop and just plain old pop. so i will divide my recs by those broad genres! i too prefer singable music so i will try to lay off on especially dissonant artists, or mark them as such so you can be prepared (LOL)

acoustic/folksy (i'll admit i am a big indie pop girl so this stuff will be a bit sparser)

phoebe bridgers — admittedly she is more alt-rocky, but see garden song, savior complex, moon song, graceland too, prayer in open D

waxahatchee — can't do much (GOD THIS SONG), lilacs, st. cloud

lucy dacus — also more alt-rocky, but here r some softer jams: hot & heavy, christine, green eyes, red face (a jily song)

anything by first aid kit! start with stay gold and the lion's roar

hozier — i feel like most people on the internet have listened to SOME hozier but check out wasteland, baby! (i tried to pick individual songs and ended up listing most of the album LOL)

kacey musgraves — another artist you've probably listened to already, but try golden hour

brittany howard — stay high must be the sweetest song in existence, and basically all of her album jaime

arlo parks — the whole album but especially caroline, hurt, and black dog

lake street dive — i can change, good kisser (a mary song if i've ever heard one), and i adore their hall & oates cover!

anya marina — this whole album has had me by the throat since like 2013

lucius — just the whole album wildewoman, h/t @figg-anon for putting me onto this!

idk what tf genre fiona apple is but try her out as well!

artists i listen to less of but are in this vein: the lumineers, bon iver, vance joy

u know i had to rec some old people shit (LOLLLL), so in this vein, joni mitchell, heart, judee sills, emmylou harris, joan baez, vashti bunyan

one-off songs you might like: hold you now by vampire weekend, big wheel by samia, i eat boys by chloe moriondo, strawberry blond by mitski (i worship at the altar of mitski but she might not be your speed haha), like i used to (acoustic) by sharon van etten & angel olsen, body by julia jacklin, jackie onassis by sammy rae and the friends, cowgirl bebop by HANA

indie pop BELOVED

maggie rogers — ok i cannot recommend this higher like if u like lorde and conan gray drop everything now and mainline maggie's brilliant debut album

HAIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! — they've got poppier songs like want you back and more mellow songs like summer girl, but honestly i would just recommend a deep dive because they have a pretty surprising breadth within their own alt-rock/pop niche

caroline polachek — can sometimes get way out n weird in the pop sense but so hot you're hurting my feelings is a very listenable pop standard (also it's so funny she's such a clever lyricist also this is irrelevant here but she sounds amazing live), also love look at me now and her cover of breathless

charli xcx is more experimental pop but would rec trying out warm (FT HAIM!!!), blame it on your love (FT LIZZO!!), and official

rina sawayama — technically her album is all sorts of genres but especially XS, comme des garcons, paradisin', bad friend, and tokyo love hotel

orla gartland is a lil softer and i love more like you, oh GOD, and did it to myself

king princess — especially cheap queen, 1950, holy, but basically all of cheap queen

more one-offs: kansas by ashe, comeback by CRJ (full paean in her honour to come in the pop section), i am a big fan of other people covering the bleachers (LOL) especially rollercoaster by charli xcx and i wanna get better by tinashe (full tinashe praise to come too), saturdays by twin shadow (FT HAIM!!!), the kiss of venus and 3 nights by dominic fike (also his interlude on halsey's album), aute cuture and milionària by rosalía, young lover by st. vincent (i love her but again might not be for u haha), good days by sza, backyard boy by claire rosinkranz, slow dancing by aly & aj, hot sugar by glass animals

if ur down to try out something weird witchy and cool, kate bush is like the originator of 9 billion pop and rock genres and hounds of love is a masterpiece

pure pop (we can split hairs on what makes pure pop LOL but basically everything here is based on ur enjoyment of doja)

carly rae jepsen — ok if u haven't listened to her non-radio-hits u may be like "what?? call me maybe lady???" to which i say YES, especially window, stay away, no drug like me, and too much

victoria monet — this may or may not be a selling point to you, but victoria is a frequent ariana grande collaborator and you can absolutely hear it in her music (see also: the mattress spring background noises in dive JUST like they are in positions...), and i love experience, go there with you, and we might even be falling in love, and why not throw in her ariana grande collab monopoly

magdalena bay — how to get physical which i am destined, nay, contractually bound, to put in a jily modern AU someday, killshot, stop & go

tinashe — basically ALL of her new album!!! SO good. i also love rascal (superstar), esther, and old jams like company (and i JUST found out she has a chaka khan cover!)

chloe x halle have the most angelic vocals in the world

this might sound actually demented because WHO hasn't heard love on the brain but rly... go give ANTI a re-listen...

tove lo — especially are u gonna tell her, mateo, and jacques

WAIT I FORGOT TO SAY ROBYN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! EVERY ROBYN SONG!!!!!!!

for that throwback poppy sound u may as well go real throwback KJAHKJA and check out donna summer!

one-offs: right to it by louis the child n ashe, serial lover by kehlani (also more by her but im getting lazy now kdjfhgk), missed calls by max n hayley kiyoko, peppers and onions by tierra whack, idk who hasnt heard this song but circles by meg, todo de ti by rauw alejandro (the way i wanted this to be song of the summer so bad ;___;)

hope you enjoy and pls come back and tell me if you really liked any of these!!!! xoxo

[jjkfire]

yeah i def feel they’re tryna focus on selling rn but then i mean they’re company cause it’s def the company who are coming up with the selling and merch. I think it’s also cause they’re at the peak of their career and they all need to start in listing in the army etc etc. So they’re tryna get the most out of it. I wish we get our storylines back tho with the next album i mean mots7 was the most personal so there’s that. I can’t rly hate it bc everyone does it, but also it bothers me a lil too

anonymous said:

girl what you said abt bts being sellouts recently? i feel you. i'm trying so hard to get back into them it's so HERE LOOK AT THIS now that i feel like i'm getting suffocated. i miss the actual deep storylines and plots of their albums and songs and when they use to do halloween dance practices :( i'm so glad they're getting the recognition they deserves bc they're such amazing boys but also,,,, it's so exhausting now :/

//

yeah i think the fact that they have to enlist soon defo has influence on it. i also think they’re trying to get their strategy down before they enlist. this is so they can go to shareholders/investors/whoever with proper numbers and be like see this is what we can do, and what we can generate. then they take that model and apply it to TXT and all other artists directly under big hit. i think jin is delaying his enlistment till end of 2021 but can’t rmb if i read that from a credible source. anyway, i really wonder how they will handle things during enlistment and post enlistment.

and though you didn’t necessarily talk about it. i really have a bone to pick with the ads/brand endorsement that they are in. i mean some of the vids are pretty boring... or just like does not inspire me to buy the product. legit the guys getting caught with iphones despite being samsung endorsers is a big lol and if i am allowed to be a little critical, is sloppy on bts’ part. anyway I feel like the execution is trash when it comes to their brand endorsements lol. big hit nails the in house content production but when they partner up with other companies, it’s not great. though i feel that’s mostly on the brands and less so on big hit/bts.

these brands want bts as ambassadors to tap into the purchasing power that ARMY has. it's millions of people willing to buy anything they endorse but I just think they could do so much better. take brands like nike and adidas when they make ads, that shit moves you. you're like yeah that's sick!!! (e.g: nike’s you can’t stop us ad). yeah yeah they can’t go all out for a brand endorsement but i think they can do some low effort stuff. like downy for example could've done smth like make the guys make a fragrance, an exclusive limited edition product or capitalize on the fact that jk loves doing laundry.... maybe a cute little laundry day with jungkook and the boys lmao idk something that's just a little more genuine. it doesn't have to be cringe or high budget but at least it doesn't make me feel like it's just their name on a product. baskin robbins though they made a ‘bts flavour’ like the guys didn’t even have a hand in making the flavour? a video about them choosing the flavour would have made me go like ok i wanna try it. also they could get bts to work at a baskin robbins shops undercover or smth. idk something funny, something meme-y but perhaps bc of covid this wasn’t viable. anyway seeing them pose with ice cream doesn't make me feel like buying it lol. for Hyundai they could've done an outdoor camping episode, or a cute video about a road trip??? SOMETHING. like make me believe they actually like the products they are trying to sell at least. I want the ads to be more than them just saying look at this product hehe. like have you seen Thai ads? their stuff is top tier. and I remember the brands behind them because that's just the impact it has. maybe brand ambassador type products just are meant to be low effort. but a great brand related celebrity endorsed ad would be this one by budweiser & dwayne wade.

and to the other anon, i wouldn’t classify bts as sellouts as per se but bighit definitely has a very aggressive sales strategy. can’t say i’m the expert on sales and marketing but idk if this model is sustainable. i think first, fans who have been fans for a while will begin to get fatigued. maybe newer fans still don’t mind it or perhaps like it even, but eventually they might get fatigued too. but that may take years so perhaps big hit has it under control. can’t say i can fully understand because i’ve always been that person that has only ever voted, streamed and basically do things that are free in order to support them... i did buy tracks on melon in the early days to help lol but i’ve never felt the absolute need to buy everything they release, the albums and all the concert dvds or summer/winter packages. so i (and perhaps we) are not who they are targeting. maybe other people think differently and will always buy and never get tired of all the constant ‘buy this!’ type messaging.

but you are right haha i do miss the deep story lines, the goofy dance practice vids, the silly vlives where it wasn’t some curated event where they are doing smth (tho i like those too!!!) i just miss namjoon straight rambling for 10 minutes about his outlook on life, eat jin, jinminkook antics, [miss tae, hobi’s and yoongi’s vlives too] and i miss jungkook’s fancafe chatrooms... i remember one concert where in his ment, namjoon (and im paraphrasing) was like someone said something that made me sad. they said they felt like as bts achieves more, bts feels even further away from them now. (-- he went on to say not to feel like that, but i honestly can’t remember. i think this is the if our music can even make you feel 1% better ment but then again i am also not sure ahahahh!)

i didn’t feel that then but i feel that now haha. there isn’t anything wrong with it and i guess it’s just the reality of life! so so so happy for them and everything that they’ve achieved. amazing that they have a fan base that is so dedicated to them, and that continues to grow. perhaps i am just getting old...

[unproduciblesmackdown]

The opposite of your last post for the ask meme! Like 1, 5, 9..

thank you lol sorry it took me a minute to get to posting these answers......i also skipped a couple that got asked previously via answering all primes lol

1: What inspires you?

hm well just basic stuff like “being in a good mood” lol or “being hyped up by friends” or “having reason to be particularly excited about something” which is all like, factors that Contribute Energy......learning about stuff / trying something and discovering like oh i’m Into this thing, or that for whatever reason something turns out to be more within reach / doable than i might’ve thought, like, hey i wanna get on this maybe.......~creatively~ it’s great to like, see other ppl’s art, and while i’ve sure been Inspired by professional artists, overall i’m more like, influenced and motivated by seeing the styles / specific works of Online Randos like me.......i also Draw to create [self-indulgent (usually fairly) niche fanart which is also probably gay and is all the time of characters i like] so like, the Stuff I Wanna Make Fanart Of (which has Whatever characters i specifically would like to draw lol) is sure directly Inspiring in that way. i’d say i never had that experience of like, ppl being kids and seeing some [distributed work in a certain art medium] like oh i want to make my own [distributed work in a certain art medium] as in like, i wanna publish a book, i wanna make movies, etc, but i guess i Did b/c i was like elementary school age in the early-to-mid 00s and experienced some instances of online fanart like :o :o wow damn ppl can do that?? just be a rando drawing fanart and sharing it w/ other people online???? and today i am living that dream, so good for me lol. and also i’d like to shoutout marge simpson anime, which is a particular piece of Online Art (technically fanart even lol) which was like, unusually Motivating as a single work of art lol, i made a notes app fanart like immediately and then a way more “painterly” piece of fanart that was v directly inspired by it lol.......and i was sure Drawing It Up last last winter when bmc 3.0 was impending / happening, b/c i got into like Just in the dec before, so that was Fresh, and then bam the Content is happening concurrently and as soon as we even just learned that jeremy has glasses i immediately spent like honestly 25 consecutive hours making fanart for that exact Inspiration. we didn’t even know abt the hello kitty shoes yet!!! and naturally im not out here for stats or clout but it is Inspiring when ppl enjoy the stuff i make and let me know one way or another. [tag comments that express enthusiasm in any way.....Appreciated]

9: Do you trust people easily, or do people have to earn your trust?

i have to say i am wary! that’s in part just like, a default anxiety defensive mode lol. but it takes me a hot minute (aka weeks....or months.....) to realize when someone like, would like to be friends or something, so while i can be Friendly and Outgoing w/ people like, immediately, i’m not picking up relationships left and right that are close enough that i’d particularly talk about “trust” or whatever. i’m not necessarily Distrustful either lol, it’s more just like, again re: the constant wariness thing. it is not unlike a cat lmao i vibe with them lol i Get that [approach]....and there’s been times i’ve been like “hmm i sure do Not vibe with this person ever and am not comfortable around them / interacting with them to any extent beyond occasional casual interactions that i don’t super enjoy. that’s me being overly anxious and failing to be personable i guess!!” and then that person Does give that reason down the line like oh, actually, that eternal uneasiness was warranted :/ damb

21: How does someone become friends with you?

yknow i was like “didn’t i Also answer this one previously” but it turned out the question i was thinking of, which i Had answered, was “how does someone become important to you” lmao.....same diff

tbh it’s kind of an arduous process lmao like. first of all i am Bad about initiating shit, and a lot of times will like, be wary of Directly Interacting with people for a while b/c i am also Bad At not being too passive / unwilling to assert anything so like, if someone’s regularly interacting with me but i’m not into it / Eventually Realize i’m not into it, it’s that thing again where my main strat is [v gradually sidle away] lol and just find it difficult to extricate myself from interactions / relationships and so that plays into me really feeling like i have to have some real confidence that i’d get on with / vibe with someone Before i start significantly interacting with / getting involved with them which....is also difficult natch lol like. can’t rly get a great feel for what someone’s like w/o talking to them.......but then if i Distance myself at all at any point will that be taken as rejection or whatever.......and then anyways say i Am talking to someone, then it’s like, also i’m just not fantastic at casual conversation always and that stage where you don’t know someone too well and talking is mostly a Polite Ritual and it’s like oh god don’t mess up, respond Normally lmaoo......i am nervous. and i also have a tendency to just naturally try to make an interaction go smoothly than immediately prioritize / feel comfortable busting out My Personality lmao.....so then even if ppl are responding well enough it’s like ah jeez i know we’re all performing always but have i shown them What I’m Actually Like to any significant degree, am i just masking it up / mirroring the crap out of how they talk?? and also it then takes me quite a while to put together “if someone keeps talking to you / choosing to interact with you for like, weeks, it probably means they want to / are interested in doing so” lol.........and then i’ll take ages more of trying to consciously Be More Myself without *also* feeling like this is too much of an act lol, and gradually picking up like oh they’re still not like, annoyed or disinterested or something..............what i am trying to say is it sure takes a minute lol

also when i Am attempting sometimes to like [initiate interaction] with people my version of being Active is still not all that active lmao i will be like [occasional Like] or [even more occasional reply] or [tag comments or no comments coz it’s twitter and im rt-ing stuff] and it’s like oh wow if we’re not having more regular interaction i suppose i’ve failed or something?? does this mean anything further lol, did i do anything.....but welp gotta have that perspective that Not Necessarily lol and i’m not the only person in the world who might not make friends or even friendly acquaintances easily / at the drop of a hat and u can’t necessarily read way into shit that hasn’t Actually been communicated to you.......naturally though it is easier to have some ~perspective~ and Serenity about all this sort of thing when you do already have some Friends lmao........been feeling (and consciously nudging myself towards feeling) More Chill about say like, friendly acquaintances i have who aren’t raring to interact with me on the reg.......ppl i’ll go months or half a year or more between having a convo with and then we’ll be like trading dm’s for a couple days and then it’s back to not really talking, and that Is What It Is, not necessarily a tragedy, and really it feels “rude” to acknowledge to myself like oh i’m not sure that me and whomever even Vibe well enough that *i’d* be raring to talk all the time either, but hey, it’s also true, i don’t have to be Validated by ppl who know me having me in their friend circles in any significant way......i be out here on the peripheral / outer orbits and i can appreciate that for what it is, even if, again, easier to be more Cool with that when i’m not Only in ppl’s periphery...........i appreciate the pal i have who like, 99% of how we Communicate is occasionally sending each other pics of our cats, not very intimate but also back when i was offline for months on end they eventually went out of their way to find someone to get in touch with to verify i hadn’t like died or anything lol........i appreciate the Gestures of Caring that ppl have and do extend, even if we do not actually talk regularly. 

and like also i’m bad at like. idk the main way i talk is again, At Some Length and often about real specific shit lol so im like woop aware that many ppl are not into that, or they might be down for having an exchange like that for a day and then they’re done.........not at all like wholly Against more lol Conversational conversations but i gotta say that’s more of a struggle lmao..........so let’s say befriending me takes some Patience. i kinda operate on [cat] rules. jellicle

25: How do you stop yourself from going back to toxic people?

i absolutely am Refraining from launching off on a ted talk of a tangent that is also me being the [the guy about to throw down a card on the pile on the table and that card pile is like “any conversation” and the guy is labeled “me” and the One Card about to be played is labeled “it’s capitalism” or smthing like that and also it’s all in spanish].jpg.......

anyways idk just try to keep things in perspective, right......i generally am pretty Passive about gradually sidling away from relationships that are bad and so by the time i Have exited them it’s pretty overdue lmao and i get to be quite confident that it was The Right Thing........and just when looking back on stuff it’s like, well if you remember the Good or “Not That Bad(tm)” parts maybe consciously think about the whole of it And specifically the Bad parts / the reasons for peacing out.......also the other day i was mulling over some standard [conflicted / complicated feelings about having cut certain ppl out entirely] and it also occurred to me that a lot of the [conflicted] feeling part came from sympathy for them, whereas from the perspective of Entirely My Own Feelings On The Matter minus that “how do/would they feel about it” consideration, the thought of never interacting w/ these ppl is like. fine with me lol........stuff like this is always Complicated and Individual and there’s certainly no like, one-stop simple Guide To Navigating All This Kind Of Thing, Cmon It’s Easy........another consideration i saw the other day via a graphic on twitter, which is probably most relevant re: say, controlling / abusive Partners, was how like, to think about how someone is acting if they’re saying you should Take Them Back b/c they’ve Changed their behavior, but to pay attention to if they’re trying to guilt you into it / justifying or downplaying their previous behavior / shifting blame and otherwise manifesting the inherently harmful and controlling patterns that are supposed to be gone now........anyways yeah complicated stuff and also just p.s. (and what would’ve been the jumping off point for the It’s-Capitalism tangential essay lol) ppl shouldn’t be blamed if they do choose to let someone back in their life like oh now they’re responsible for bringing their mistreatment upon themself.....no better than blaming someone for, say, having a harmful / controlling romantic partner in the first place like oh well they should’ve known better than to have gotten involved with this person..........ppl are in control of their own abusive behavior and shouldn’t be considered Forces Of Nature no matter how intransigent they are

33: Do you have someone you know you can always rely on?

tbt question 9 lol there’s defo some people that i do trust! love it....

45: Do you consider yourself creative?

another #tbt to question 1 lol.......i mean Yes i am creative in ways but like, who Isn’t, really.......think sometimes “creativity” means “do you like, do Art things” which, yes i do, but then within that there’s art that’s deemed more ~creative~ or w/e......not to mention that i don’t think something has to be definitively labeled an Art to be creative. like, for example, Science and Art aren’t opposites / the antithesis of each other, and anytime defines ~science~ as like, people just memorizing and outputting Facts and Numbers and considers this a distinction from Being An Artist.....wild and i Will fight you lmao. i tell you i can v much remember times i have had to completely disengage to keep from losing my cool at people arguing about “why i respect science but could only be an artist :’|” or “why Art is actually harder than Science and also we’re the underdogs b/c society values science so much more :’|” like.....mf...........anyways scientific pursuits may certainly have a different Methodology (see: scientific method) than art but lbr it still requires creativity and science and art are friends you fucking fools................and then also just zooming in on the Art-Making business here, i also like, have never had any interest in coming up with Original stories / characters and the like, and i don’t enjoy trying and it just really is not my thing, and it’s Funny or something when people wanna say that creative fanworks have value b/c they let ppl cut their teeth for what really matters, inevitably making their own original content(tm)......that isn’t inevitable for me lol and certainly is nothing i aim to do ever, and when there’s the suggestion that if you’re Good enough at ur medium you gotta manifest some of that original the character do not steal shit.........anyways i’m not pressed to claim i am an Artist(tm) or Creative(tm) lol like i guess technically i am both but i have no professional aspirations and my brain does not Do [generate original content] so it’s all like, i’m just out here.........s/o to this time i was trying to do my fuckin thing drawing on a tablet in a cafe and some random annoying guy is trying to talk and i happen to mention like “lol i don’t exactly call myself an artist really” and Guy goes “OH REALLY??? WHAT’S WRONG WITH ARTISTS? WHAT’S YOUR ISSUE WITH ART” like please cool it lmao but god p sure it was a guy who was just. very Around and very annoying in general

49: Do you feel like you’re a good person?

yeah i think i’m alright but really what is the use in like considering there 2 be achievable Good or Bad Person Statuses for everyone........let’s say it’s an ongoing, active state to be in the process of consciously choosing to be Good and working towards Better. especially considering that We Live In A Society which tries to teach everyone and continuously imbues our existence with Bad Messages about how to perceive and engage with other people, and being A Good Person is a lifelong effort and it’s unhelpful to feel that if you’re already Good or well-intentioned enough you can just dust off your hands and be like “well my work here is done” and be unprepared to examine your beliefs/actions or deal with the might-as-well-assume-it’s-an-inevitability that even if u have some noble-ass beliefs you’ll fail to live up to them at some point/s.......so like yeah lol again i feel like i am a pretty good person but can always be better and ought to be aware of / willing to work on that at any point

[cockbiteproductions]

Tbh I was unimpressed with Black Friday. None of the characters rly resonated with me, it felt like they were trying too hard to make TGWDLM refs, and the whole “pulling things from the Black and White” was dumb.

oh i feel you a lot dude. i watched the digital ticket back in november and was definitely incredibly disappointed initially. black friday is sadly near the bottom of my starkid show rankings. spoilers ahead.

the book was just an absolute mess. it tried to do WAY too much and so it accomplished almost nothing. they had too many characters and not enough time to devote to all of them. i felt nothing when (SPOILERS AHEAD) ethan died because he’d only had like… two scenes before that? no investment in his or lex’s story at that point. and we never get to see the fallout of from his death with lex. so that was a bit of a waste. also. lex is almost an emma carbon copy. most of the show was basically a string of great character moments with barely anything to hold the rest of it together. i remember watching the bit with becky confessing to murdering her husband and thinking kim whalen was acting the FUCK outta it but not really caring about the fate of any of the characters in the show. the acting from a lot of the regular sk members that were part of the tgwdlm cast members was good as usual but it didn’t feel like they were being challenged in the way that their roles in tgwdlm did. solid work but not anything special from them.

you’re very right about the tgwdlm bit. all the biggest jokes in the show were plain callbacks to tgwdlm (just off the top of my head, the boxes bit, the wear a watch bit). those jokes would have not gotten nearly as many laughs or even really make sense without tgwdlm. it’s already like. really culty. which isn’t bad but the show shouldn’t depend on its cult status to be good. the fact that the book bit of the show basically ends with “well let’s go see my reclusive bio professor” *winks at camera* was really off-putting to me. i would really love to hear someone’s opinion of black friday who hasn’t seen tgwdlm and isn’t trying to be nice about it. i said this on my musical theater blog when the digital ticket came out, but the sort of tgwdlm callbacks i liked were the musical cues. the bit with mall cop robert and the show me your hands melody was great. you lost nothing if you hadn’t seen tgwdlm but if you did, it was a bonus. that’s how references should operate. thanks matt dahan for my life.

i was actually pretty ok with the black and white stuff, but then again i haven’t thought about the show as a whole in a while. i might come back in a while and be like “this is a good idea” or “this was fuckin dumb.” it takes me a while and a few rewatches of any media to really grasp all the themes. but i feel like with black friday all the main themes were “capitalism bad and we’re dominated by consumer culture” and that was it. not subtle in its delivery at all. im sure there’s more but i will have to come back to it to pick up on them.

as a whole the music for black friday was definitely better than tgwdlm in that all the songs actually felt integrated with the show with the exception of the finale number (which was an issue i had especially with america is great again from tgwdlm, which is unfortunate because it’s also one of my favorite numbers from that show). i will say that they probably could have cut one of dylan’s songs and then maybe another one from the show as it was starting to get very music heavy and a bit hard to get through. maybe the santa number. it felt very unnecessary and as though they were trying to artificially recreate the success of the workin boys bit.

i am also a bit disappointed in the way it was filmed. i do like the closeup shots but i feel like it leaned in too heavily on that and some of the ensemble stuff was lost because it was focused on the main actor too closely. starkid i feel is always at its best when ensemble based. it’s the large group numbers that they get you with but that was lost in the filming a bit this time. higher production value isn’t always better. i guess nick lang was just getting creative in the film direction bit of it this time. which i guess might help on royalties if he’s ever to direct an episode. 

but those were my thoughts back in november. after a while i was like. you know what. this is starkid. im the fool for expecting professional quality stuff from them. they spun out this show in less than a year (even if they’ve had the idea for quite a while now, they didn’t start the book in earnest until less than a year before the actual production) when it takes most shows in the professional theater community like years and years to workshop and develop. i feel like tgwdlm was an anomaly in starkid shows in that imo it was actually decent to pretty good in almost all aspects. most of the time starkid shows are like. lovingly trashy. tgwdlm broke the mold a bit with that but black friday was a lot more similar to the usual bit of a mess starkid shows usually are. and that’s fine. their shows don’t have to be good. they’re not producing for critics. they’re producing for their dedicated audience. but i also feel like they are doing both themselves and us a disservice by simply pandering and mindlessly repeating what worked in tgwdlm. i would like to see them grow as artists and black friday in many ways felt like it was a step back from tgwdlm.

[jan-uinely]

hot takes continued

here we go. season 12 episode 12. 

so. it’s time to chit chat about drag race. if u dont like my opinions sry. 

this is gonna get bigger than one episode or one season. this is meta drag race. 

but first i guess the episode. right. so. obviously it was a “musical” so obviously i wanted to see jan sing and obviously she did not. I do think that this challenge [not necessarily placed in this episode] would have been a great time to do a like returning queens. but i digress.

i think that it was a little muddled. like it wasn't like any of the “girl group” numbers where it’s just the verse and chorus. all of the verses were placed in different spots throughout the show. I also think it’s ironic that this whole episode is to promote this live vegas show which is obviously not happening right now. but alas. 

i agree with bob in that i liked jackie’s verse the best. 

i did not love gigi’s outfit in the challenge. you couldn't make out the heart as easily bc the red was all the same color. I also think the material used was too chunky- it was quilted. i would have rather had the heart be quilted, not have a corset underneath it, and have the rest of the top part not be quilted. i thought it was a good concept but i would have preferred different #choices. i also would have rather the hair been straight instead of curled.

i did not have a huge issue w crystal’s orange and green outfit. i also appreciated the callback stars and stripes hair. though maybe not together?

jaida was good as per usual. i want her to win, but we will get to that later. 

also let us note the basketball wives hair that made a comeback [gigi, jackie]

runway time.

crystal and ******’s outfits did not fit the way i wanted them too, and the problems were both in the hips. when i saw them i thought the hips should be exaggerated, but instead they both looked weirdly deflated. and crystal’s torso section could have been brought in. [i did see on instagram that the person who made crystal’s look [casey caldwell who is a nyc based designer, works w a lot of neoprene/thick materials- just look up on instagram caseyyalater] actually made it for dragcon and crystal bought it right there, so it wasn’t tailored] 

in the dior v dior battle, i thought gigi won. jackie’s dress was just i think a little too large [not in terms of tailoring, in terms of diameter] but it was very jackie

gigi said that her outfit was quintessential gigi, which i think it interesting bc if you look up showgirls performances, it very much is. however in terms of the character portrayed on drag race i didn’t think it was. it was very well made, etc. but it just didn’t fit the “perfectionist trope” of the show. 

jaida is once again wearing a gown with a presequinned fabric, which i am not mad at. it is quintessential jaida. 

critiques. 

again ooh we have to nitpick bc we accidentally cast too many winners on this season blah blah blah. i was not a fan of when they said oh well we will have to look at report cards. as if they didnt intentionally load up gigi and ****** with wins at the start of the show. 

and then it’s like oh well jackie and crystal have to lip sync blah blah blah. and you know that jackie is going home. bc the judges absolutely love crystal, all because of that mullet. 

to quote bob “I used to be really upset at queens who won the judges with their personality” and that is still mostly true for me. i don’t think her placement is unjust or whatever, but like if ru didn’t like the mullet, she would not have been given the confidence boost to turn her trajectory around, compared to jackie and widow and jan, who did most things right but just were not rupaul’s fave, and must have had a much more difficult time mentally on the show. 

and FWIW heidi falls into this category as well. race chaser i think said it - all of her success comes from ru’s ideas. and being naturally funny and charismatic and having ru like you as a person is a huge gift and huge talent, but the inability to wrangle it...  that being said i think she deserves the world and will grow [and has already grown] from this experience.

and the thing is that crystal also keeps going back to the same stuff which could have been funny if the episodes were more than one apart or if she didn't do it twice in one episode but. idk. 

now, who will win, who should win, hmm hmm hmm. tbh i don’t think it will be crystal. they just crowned the oddball and they like to mix it up, or at least try to. also why looking at the history of dusted or busted scores [and s/o to jan for coming in @ 4 [after the disqualification]] crystal is at a 2, and bebe won with the lowest score at a 3 [w 2nd and 3rd place at 4 and 5], and that was in season 1, which was a whole other ballgame. leaving us with jaida and gigi. i am team jaida. i think that she is much more developed as an artist and performer than gigi, and I think that she will bring us something new.

[here comes the meta part]

the title is america’s next drag superstar. and i think in the beginning of the show, they decided that that had to mean something new and exciting, something that pushed the boundaries of what drag could be [which is rly ironic coming from them but]. which has developed this culture of what is the formula to be successful on drag race. and some people were more overt about this [jan] and some people were more subtle about this [gigi and jackie]. 

but for some reason, the [Black] pageant queens will make it to the top and then never win. - and they’ve had overt conversations regarding pageants and pageant culture on the show before - but balls and pageants were like the building blocks of drag culture in the us [from what i understand]. so inherently that means it’s no longer “new” and exciting. but the thing is that so many of these fashion [/nyc] queens work so exclusively with these high end designers to produce these looks [i think bob said it can cost like 10K to prep all your stuff for drag race] and with that the ability to design and sew falls away. 

and i think that is reflected in the challenges and how they have changed. this season there was one design challenge. and that is just so disappointing to me bc i think the design challenges really separate who has a full understanding of their persona and who does not. 

and with fewer and fewer design challenges, you have more and more designer items, and the ability to create something has fallen to the wayside. personally [and i will probably make another post about this later] i want to bring back the design challenges in one of two ways. 1. have an all designers season. where drag designers work to make elaborate costumes based on a prompt and given certain materials. bc on the show designers are not credited as much [that part comes on instagram]. 2. i want to have a drag race blank slate competition. where contestants audition and are given a list of prompts but cannot bring anything except like a notebook. no prepared outfits. you can sketch designs to the prompts, but all the materials are provided. contestants still have a main challenge and a runway, but rather than 2 days, they are given a full week to execute the challenge and the outfit. this would totally change the game in my mind. like one you wouldn't have to have money or take out loans to compete, you could just come and show who you are. and two the audience could see more of what goes into this stuff. AND if drag race really wants to feed us, they could do like a wed. ep and a friday ep. to spread things out. 

my favorite challenges are design challenges, and while i think the first challenge this season gave us a better introduction to who the contestants are, the design challenge is a really good thing to have at the front. 

i do think that if they had not had the debate that there would have been another design challenge in the mix, but bc it was an election year. 

anyways, i want jaida to win bc she’s excellent at what she does. and at this point there is something new and exciting about making all your own clothes and being polished and knowing who you are.  and tbh gigi doesn’t bring anything new to the table. sure the ability to sew and design is good, but compared to aquaria and violet the designs were not as diverse or inventive. on top of that, the fact that gigi is outwardly apolitical [and doesn’t understand the connotation of “privilege” in today’s times] is just not a good look. I also think that it is interesting that gigi came in as the look queen but actually did better in the acting challenges. 

idk my main takeaway is that gigi is really really good at playing other people, and with that comes a lack of self awareness. striving so hard to be perfect can come at the cost of not knowing who you are as an artist. like gigi’s brand is literally “im that bitch/bitch” which again, just isn’t what i want in a winner. 

and tbh the gigi bug bit early but ended when ru gave her the win on the madonna episode. [i will say that jackie could have won snatch game but tbh i was annoyed w her for being a little dickish to the safe girls that week [though what she said was totally understandable] and also i <3 jackie cox [and chelsea piers we stan chelsea piers in this house] i think there is something so gr8 abt being a nerd and being prepared and being on brand about it. also jackie is always the one to hop on the dolls’ lives and comment their venmo. hashtag cool aunt jackie. [though that here for cox t-shirt and the promo photos make me uncomfy though i get it]]

re jackie coming back to complete the top 4... IDK it’s nice and all but they've already established that they don’t want her to win- otherwise she would not have been eliminated. 

also in my mind there are only 12 places so jan actually came in 7, widow 6, heidi 5, jackie 4. 

anyways these are my thoughts. as usual, raw and unedited. 

[mvlcolms]

*clears throat*  is  this  thing  on  ?  hi  friends  im  mella  !  i  go  by  feminine  pronouns  n  am  19  yrs  of  achy  joints  and  random  migraines  .  basically  19  going  on  107  .  i’m  here  to  introduce  u  to  malcolm  .  fair  warning  tho  ..  he  is  the  worst  .  so  if  u  dont  hate  both  of  us  by  the  end  of  this  ,  feel  free  to  like  this  or  hmu  so  we  can  plot  smth  ? 

❛ welcome  to  new  york  ,  malcolm  hansen  .  your  resemblance  to  herman  tommeraas  is  absolutely  uncanny  .  by  the  looks  of  your  tesla  roadster  ,  we’re  thinking  you’ll  fit  right  in  .  according  to  tmz  ,  you  just  had  your  twenty  second  birthday  bash  .  your  chances  of  making  it  in  the  city  are  dicey  since  you’re  unscrupulous  ,  but  being  captivating  gives  you  an  advantage  .  (  cismale  &  he/him  ) 

SO  let  me�� introduce  u  to  malcolm  richard  hansen  iii  ,  but  if  u  call  him  anything  other  than  mac  ,  he  prob  will  throw  hands  .  he  comes  from  olllllld  money  ,  nobody  rly  knows  how  the  family  got  rich  initially  but  his  grandpa  (  the  og  malcolm  )  made  even  more  money  by  creating  a  very  successful  record  label  thats  now  rly  dominant  in  the  music  industry  .  his  grandpa  is  currently  79  yrs  old  n  just  recently  stepped  out  as  the  ceo  but  is  still  has   a  lot  of  influence  in  the  company  and  obviously  in  the  family  .  this  might  sound  irrelevant  but  it  will  be  important  later  on  i  promise  .

ok  so  mac  was  born  to  mac  jr  and  a  former  singer  named  tara  michaels  .  they  met  when  she  was  in  the  record  label  building  , for  a  meeting  in  regards  to  a  possible  contract  and  the  rest  was  history  ?  grandpa  hated  tara  and  made  no  secret  of  his  opinions  abt  her  .  basically  he  thought  she  was  a  golddigger  (  she  was  )  and  his  son  was  stupid  (  also  true  )  ,  and  even  refused  to  attend  their  wedding ceremony .  needless  to  say  ,  as  soon  as  they  got  married  ,  the  couple  left  sunny  california  n  settled  down  in  chicago  .

mac  was  his  first  male  grandchild  tho  ,  n  even  if  he  hated  his  mother  n  resented  his  dads  stupidity  ,  mac  was  kinda  like  his  golden  child  .  so  senior  kinda  stole  his  grandson  ?  not  rly  but  he  did  keep  him  in  la  every  summer  n  holidays  ,  when  he  wasnt  in  school  in  chicago  .

so  mac  rly  looked  up  to  his  grandpa  growing  up  even  if  he  also  thought  he  was  an  asshole  ?  they  werent  super  close  but  had  a  lot  of  respect  for  each  other  ,  n  mac  much  preferred  spending  his  time  with  og  mac  than  with  mac  jr  n  his  ma   (  oh  boy  this  is  bound  to  get  confusing  )  .  but  yea  ,  his  grandpa  was  a  huge  influence  on him  while  growing  up  ,  which  was  mayhaps  not  a  good  idea  .

once  he  graduated  high  school  ,  his  grandpa  told  him  that  he  wanted  him  to  run  the  company  in  his  dads  place  bc  he  wasnt  leaving  a  multibillion  dollar  company  for  that  doofus  ,  but  sneaky  old  mac  told  him  that  there  were  terms  to  this  development  .  mac  would  get  the  company  once  he  retired  ,  but  since  his  father  had  been  such  a  dumb  fuck  ,  he  would  only  get  the  company  n  his  money  ,  if  he  married  a  woman  approved  by  the  senior  before  he  kicked  the  bucket  .  mac  threw  an  absolute  fit  ,  but  eventually  came  to  the  conclusion  that  he’d  rather  marry  someone  for  convenience  than  be  poor  for  the  rest  of  his  life  .  which  tbh  so  would  i  .

ENTER  ARRANGED  FIANCÉE  .  they’ve  been  engaged  for  about  two  yrs  now  but  no  one  is  in  any  rush  for  the  actual  marriage  .  the  deal  was  that  they  only  had  to  do  it  before  senior  died  ,  n  since  he’s  in  pretty  much  perfect  help  ,  the  duo  is  just  biding  their  time  .  mac  moved  to  nyc  to  live  w/  the  fiancée  ,  but  as  of  now  ,  they  r  pretty  much  just  roommates  atm  .  so  yeah  basically  thats  how  mac  ended  up  in  this  moment  in  his  life  lmao  . 

in  regards  to  his  personality  ,  mac  is  pretty  much  a  mini  version  of  malcolm  senior  .  he’s  v  confident  (  cocky  )  n  has  a  LOT  of  trouble  trying  to  view  life  by  any  other  point  of  view  than  his  own  .  very  selfish  and  honestly  not  a  guy  u  can  put  ur  trust  in  ?  he’s  not  like  a  super  asshole  or  anything  ,  is  in  fact  rly  charming  n  can  be  a  great  person  to  hang  out  w/  but  if  you’re  his  best  friend  n  he  feels  like  he  can  get  away  w/  hooking  up  w  your  mom  ? 12/10  will  do  it  .

is  mad  into  parties  ?  always  hanging  out  in  the  hottest  spots  w  all  different  kinds  of  ppl  until  the  sun  is  comin  up  .  he  has  weird  views  when  it  comes  to  dating  which  is  lowkey  for  is  kinda  an  asshole  who  gives  no  fucks  n  usually  ends  up  being  hated  by  his  exes  .

but  he’s  also  a  super  fun  guy  to  be  around  !!  will  always  be  down  for  a  good  time  n  do  his  best  to  cheer  u  everyone  around  him  .  u  r  always  going  to  be  entertained  around  him  there  isnt  even  a  choice  .

he  works  on/off  for  the  record  label  ,  mostly  monitoring  bigger  artists  n  such  because  we  love  nepotism  around  here  friends  ,  but  he  also  does  music  every  once  in  a  while  ?  its  not  frequent  ,  n  he  mostly  writes  songs  for  other  artists  , but  he  has  previously  released  an  album  n  scored  a  couple  of  #1s  .  i  pretty  much  think  of  his  vc  n  style  as  bazzi’s  ,  but  he’s  definitely  not  super  active  as  a  singer .

so  far  this  is  pretty  much  it  for  mac  .  i’m  still  working  on  him  a   little  ,  but  this  is  an  alright  outline  of  his  for  now  .  i’m  gonna  list  some  possible  connections  but  those  are  gonna  be  pretty  basic  .  feel  free  to  hmu  in  my  ims  or  on  discord   (  mella is lost #1597  )  where  i  am  p  much  all  the  time  so  we  can  come  up  w  some  bomb  ideas ?

someone  whos  signed  to  the  label  n  they  connected  through  it  ?  could be  all  kinds  of  stuff  actually  .  

best  friends  bc  even  demons  need  those  every  once  in  a  while  .

exes  ,  all  kinds  of  them  but  mostly  bad  terms  bc  mac  is  the  worst  .

pretty  much  all  the  fwbs  no  strings   attached  things  specially  if  they  come  w/  angst   . 

hype  friends  who  r  always  there  to  have  a  good  time  w  each  other  .

first  love  type  of  thing  ?

skinny  love  that  will  never  work  ?

i  cant  think  of  anything  else  ?  pls  dont  give  up  on  me  tho  n  like  this  thing  or hmu  for plots  bye !!!

[alterlifes-a]

tag muns you want to know better; repost - don’t reblog.

What inspired you to try/create that muse/s: well , if you’ve been with me long enough then you know that tooru started out as an AU ! o.ikawa t.ooru, where instead of attending s.eijou , he went to s.hiratorizawa ! to be honest , i kind of just wanted to try my hand at writing that kind of thing ? it was the very first time i had made a tumblr rp blog , so i had no idea that people rp different verses of the same character on one blog !! i originally rp’d on deviantart , and it was very commonplace to have different blogs for different verses ... i had over 70 rp blogs on there and most of them were literally the same 2 characters but in different AUs LMAO ... so imagine my surprise when i saw people rp’ing different AUs on one blog ... RP’ing multiple muses on one blog ... !! but i kinda just stayed with my iteration instead of playing canon ! kawa anyway , since i didn’t really see the point in starting over . as tooru developed more , though , i began to use him as a venting tool because this was a part of my life where i was really depressed . but as time grew on and i eventually made him into an OC , he became a much happier character . he really is my best friend ; he’s been there for me through it all , and even though he’s just fictional , i really owe him a lot for helping me out during rough times .

What is inspiration for that muse/s: well , currently , a lot of things ... lots of music , japanese culture + religion , and also my own experiences . in general , i have a p.interest board for him , so ... maybe you could say i draw inspiration from that , too ! i also rly enjoy the band MILI . their songs really fit tooru , like ‘ bathtub mermaid ’ . i’ve also been listening to hello , again and am planning on drawing something based on it for him ( + the song’s prequel , “ goodbye ” ) . i mainly tend to daydream while listening to songs , so ... yeah . as for characters who serve as inspiration for tooru ... well , i think that’s an artist meme , so i might just fill it in in lieu of answering this properly lol ... but two i can think of off the top of my head are leon from f.ire e.mblem e.choes and n.eferpitou from h.xh ! 

Thread/AU that made you really happy: B.NHA AU ... !! i’m hyperfixating sm on that one ... idk , a lot of planning and plotting goes into it , esp since a lot of my mutuals are in the fandom . in particular , i love love love the story i’ve created with @noquirk . i literally cannot envision a more perfect plot for tooru in this verse . heck , it’s literally my main go - to timeline when i draw / write for it . tooru is , quite literally , not very much in this AU without deck .

Something really special on your wishlist: sh ... more ships ... ships to draw and animate and make animatics to ... also i need to get my butt into gear and finish my JRPG AU group lol .

Something you are looking for in short future for your muse: blease tooru help me get thru the school year ... also i have some animatics in the back burner so i’m looking forward to getting those done !

Share something related to your muse!: his canon story , in parallel motion , deals with existentialism and alternate universes . ultimately , it’s a story that serves as a physical manifestation of my own struggle with depression , and while it’s sombre in tone , i want it to tell whoever’s reading it , “ you matter . ” it’s why tooru is placed into so many marginalized groups ; he’s fat and trans and biracial and bi and suffers from bpd + depression + anxiety but he’s a good person through it all ... his story is tragic because he’s not allowed to exist and will be forgotten when he dies , but his existence impacts so many other characters’ lives ... it’s a butterfly effect kind of thing . because you exist , you’ve made so many peoples’ lives better . and i understand it’s rough and i understand depression + sucky real life aspects try to convince you otherwise , but just ... think about it . there’s an alternate universe where , because you don’t exist , something huge was probably impacted . and even on a smaller , more intimate scale --- if you hadn’t existed in another life , then one of your friends might not be here . they might not be as happy as they are now , because you make them happy . life can be awful . but it’s wonderful and beautiful , too . that’s what i want tooru to be to others . someone to look up to and relate to , and someone who tells you , “ it’s okay ! ”

What do you think about character’s design/how do you came up with this: he’s ... kinda generic LOL mainly cause he’s based off of o.ikawa looks - wise due to his origin ... but part of his looks also derivate from an old ask blog muse i had :

i just really like that bangs - over - one - eye hairstyle ngl ... also i have no idea how / when his hair became maroon - brown since o.ikawa’s hair is chestnut brown , but ... yeah . also have no idea when he gained red eyes HDKJSFS,,,, i find fangs appealing on a character though , so that’s why he has fangs and does the :3c ... honestly i think i kinda just slapped together what i like in a design and put it on him , so even though he may look like an NPC ( lol ) , he’s still appealing in my eyes .

What your muse taught you: how to love being alive ... ( i’ve actually written an essay for a class about how he’s helped me through depression haha ... he means a lot to me , can you tell ? )

What is roleplay for you: all of you are awful and yet here i am anyway so really this says more about me than anything else .

Just say something nice about other mun!: @onfaith you are my ANGEL you mean sm to me and i wish u all the best with your studies  /  @tikkvn i love u sm cass ur an amazing person n a wonderful existence never forget that  /  @juuheart notay is my fave bleach chara also ur art is so cute  /  @wuvlite if i die all my money goes to u so u can keep drawing holy SHIZ ur art is #inspiration  /  @queznak ur very interesting and charismatic as a person  !!!  /  @uzvisen idk how to spell ur url this took me 3 tries but also ilysm  /  @conhnhaketon i also cant spell ur url but i hope ur doing well n ur eid was good , ik we’ve both been busy but i would live for u  /  @quirkthief ur one of my fave ppl i will forever tag u in shibes also i’ve supported u in u saying afo was hot even when he looked ugly n now i get to watch everyone who made fun of u writhe bc he is rly rly hot hahaha  /  @noquirk you’re so talented pls never stop what ur doing  /  @aerve you’re rly cool !!! 100% support u in everything u do ! >:0  /  @starbooms aries ur so creative ugh ... ur mind !!!!!! ik we don’t talk much but ur v fun  /  @bendsair i forget what other blogs ur on but chris ur the coolest #TalkRomania2Me  /  @creatied we don’t talk much either but ur graphics r so aesthetically appealing wowzers !!  /  @daimnas i’m wuv you amari !! also my french sucks but uhhh comment ca va ( i’m too lazy to find the accented ‘c’ dsfhi ) ??  /  @soarsun i’ve only known u for a few weeks but if anything happened to u i would kill everyone on this website n then myself  /  @quirkgifter nanners is the coolest n nana is the best grandma in town  /  @natsutodoroki im so jealous u got a canon url as ur rp url LMAO but also ur rly cool n fun even tho we dont talk too frequently !  /  @lechors​ LINNEA I WILL DIE FOR U RIGHT HERE RIGHT N---  /  @ YOU READING THIS BC I’M ABOUT TO FALL ASLEEP : YOU’RE AWESOME AND GREAT !

Tagged by: stole it from @queznak Tagging: whomstever 

[tknbe]

Falling (Original song: Harry Styles) by JK of BTS

There's so much I want to say about this cover. First of all, the original song contains so much pain and emotion on it, honestly I never thought I could have liked anyone covering it. Even more after watching the MV.

The lyrics are just painful and probably and sadly all of us have been through a situation or loss that made us feel like the pain this song talks about. I've been through many moments where I've felt like that and well that's mostly because this song has meant a lot to me since the very first day it came out.

Whenever I'm so attached to a song its really hard for someone to cover and me to like it but well, the same happened with fix you and ofc bangtan prove me wrong. And now Jungkook covering this song completely broke me for many reasons but honestly idk if I will find the words to convey what I'm truly feeling or what I feel whenever I listen to the original or the cover.

Jungkook did a great job and I'm not gonna talk about technical stuff because I rly don't know/understand much. I just wanted to say how proud I am to see the way he keeps improving his vocals even if he's been a great singer since the very beginning.

The way he puts covers out there making us feel every single word he's singing and just as I said any of us could have felt the way these lyrics describe, I'm sure he's felt like that before too and that's why he can sing it so heartfully. Showing us he's human, even if we don't want them to suffer or go through not so nice thing's we've been through, they did and will do.

It makes me a little sad when they talk about their insecurities, fears or times when they've felt down or had any kind of issue because whenever that happens I just wanna protect them, run to them and tell them everything's gonna be alright. I'm obviously referring to BTS but also Harry.

Going back to the song, the voice, the emotion, the tones range, the adlibs, the backing vocals just keep giving me the chills whenever I listen to both the original and this amazing cover. Again, Jungkook did an amazing job and even if I fainted when I got the notification and started listening to the song, I will forever be grateful for him to suddenly gift us this beautiful cover.

I also wanted to say how comfortable I feel talking about whatever in here. My first safe place is bangtan and well, this is my second. I feel I can talk about anything and I won't be judged like I've been in many other places.

These days I've been feeling a bit like this song and today I took a deep breathe to listen to it again and finally try to write a little about how I felt/feel about this cover since I haven't talked to anyone, not even myself about it yet.

I know this won't be read by anyone probably but I just like to write things and post them here, not caring about if someone is gonna read it or not because I'm just looking to put my feelings, good or bad, what makes me feel good, what bothers me and stuff like that out there.

First of all because it helps me to get rid of that feeling if its bothering me and to share my happiness with whoever gets to see the post. Second, because if someone finds any of my posts, reads it and can relate with them or feel what I'm saying and I can help them in any way, that warms my heart and let me tell you. I'm here for you and I'll help you any way I can♡. And third, I love to write a whole lot even if im not that good at it, plus is good to let whatever is inside of you out in the world 😊

But yeah, Jungkook king of vocals, covers and many, many more things. Thank you for blessing us always with things like these even if sometimes it can break out hearts or make us sob a whole lot to actually comprehend what's going on. I know how much this man love us and I will always try my best to make him see how great artists and even more amazing person he is because he deserves only great things happening to him, I just want his happiness and seeing him smile big, always.

Im sorry for the long ass text, I don't even know if this is gonna make sense but I hope it does. I mean in my mind, while writing it down, it kinda did. Tho I couldn't put everything I wanted to down in words but it's late and I'm tired :( plus is very hard to put actual feelings in words if im being honest. But yeah, I will just leave now...

Love both these men to infinity and beyond ♾💜

[jungsungchans]

oh school twins lmao. how’d your test go? i’m doing ok. testing just finished for me too & my school starts break in like 4 days so that’s nice. i’m looking forward to sleeping a lot. i don’t know much about games but i hope you have fun!! (also my response is super long so you’ll probably get like 6 messages. sorry 😅) (1)

More Words Under The Cut ☝🏽

i’m actually a missive multi stan lol. i’m into like 80 kpop groups or something ridiculous like that. (i get bored of music really quickly, so i end up seeking out and consuming a lot of new music and get into a lot of different groups because of it) i’m honestly pretty much like everyone and if i were to try and list my favorite groups there would probably be like 20 names 😅 but i’m super super fond of ateez, stray kids, e’last, a.c.e, itzy, & sunmi!  ohhhh who’s your exo bias? i never really got into them but i do admire them as artists & musicians!! i do like superm so i like kai and baekhyun a lot lol. do you maybe have any song or mv recs?  actually thank you for the can of worms!! and i totally agree. jaehyun really seems so chill and cool. but nope. he really is such a secret dork <3 not to make the can of worms larger, but what are some of your favorite moments of him? your favorite cover? your favorite performance? and do you prefer rapper or vocalist jaehyun? i actually got into nct because of superm sometime in february. i didn’t really like lucas at first. mostly cause i just didn’t like his face??? not sure why, but now i feel kind of dumb for it lol. eventually wayv had a comeback and i just sort of got into them. i’m not sure what really changed my mind about lucas. but one day i just kind of went ‘i think lucas is my ult?’ and now he’s my ult 🤷 it just kind of happened. like i didn’t fall hard or anything, i just comfortably landed in place??? again sorry that was so long. i hope you have a good day/night <3 🎄🎄 (6) 

hey hey hey sorry this is so late im so fuckin lame omg. i mentioned last time that id started genshin impact but then it like consumed me over the course of the day even though im really bad at video games etc etc. but yoooo school twins!!! this was my first semester of college and idt it went as well as idve liked it to have gone but like oh well. how was ur semester? are you lookin forward to vacation? 

ohhh word thats a lot of groups!!! i can really relate to that getting bored of music thing 🤔 but i dont rly listen to a lot of kpop outside of the groups i like. im def w u on atz skz itzy and sunmi! i haven’t heard any elast or ace though ive heard theyre good, so if u have any recs...! 

in exo kai’s my bias actually!!! hes my longest standing bias, its been nearly Five Years of erigomism for me ig lol . unfortunately theyre not so active anymore but his solo fucking rocked so im rly happy about that....for recs idk what kind of music ur into? but i guess love me right lotto growl and monster should cover like...most of the bases of Types of Music People Enjoy i think. 

jaehyun is so fuckin ... jeez i think he’s great but like favorite moments is hard cuz hes rly just very endearing on the whole...but if i had to pick, this is the dawdger dog wow dawdger dog only here at dawdger stadium from 127 hit the states, all of nct x vancouver, and just about any jcc w him in it specifically the ikea one i think 🤔 there r just toooo many. fave cover ill b basic and say ilmb but the moment he drops anything rnb ill probably like that. i rly dont have a super favorite performace for jaehyun i think hes just a really good dancer and performer who has great presence! but i WILL say that idgaf about anything suits i think the sm stylists need to retire boring ass office wear and embrace tradition [simon says more experimental styling]. im definitely a vocalist jaehyun advocate i think hes got such a nice voice like i normally am Not Into Slow Songs but try again has me by the throat him and dear put something in there fr

YOU DIDNT LIKE LUCAS’ FACE AT FIRST????????????? ok No offence meant whatsoever. ik looks r subjective and all but like. i did not expect that. but i definitely also kind of Just Wound Up being a lucas stan like it wasnt something that was a very definite realization but he is just somehow. very likeable 

i hope u have a good day too bud! take care! 🔥

[reallyhardydraws]

below the cut is me answering a bunch of very kind and sweet asks. it’s mostly just me saying thank you so much a lot, but i just want everyone to know: if you’ve ever sent me a kind anonymous compliment, it absolutely means the world to me. a lot of the time i seriously struggle with my sense of self-worth, and it’s mostly linked to my art -- so to have received so many messages this year from mysterious and lovely strangers pepping me up about my work really means a lot to know people out there are rooting for me!!! 💖💖💖

in an effort to save people’s dashboards from tons of messages rather than any art posts, i put my replies under this cut. these go right back to some messages from about...4 months ago. oopsies!!! on this occasion, i’d like to think...better late than never. but! remember i treasure all these messages. each time i go in my inbox and see them im like. so much love.

anonymous: i want u to know id die 4 ur art/art style but not rly because then i wouldn't be able to see it anymore (overall message: i lov ur stuff it's so nice ok bye)

thank you so much!!! but definitely LIVE, and i swear i’ll try and have more bright and colourful drawings for you to enjoy as soon as i can 😀👍🎨

anonymous: your art constantly blows me away. and you made a post a while back about how you draw patterns on fabrics!!! and it was so helpful!!! I couldn't fathom how to draw plaid and you have saved me. many thanks for this blessing

hey, thank you tons and tons buddy! i’m glad to have helped out, you are very very welcome!!! ✋🌟🤚

anonymous: both you and your art are so?? pleasing to the eye?? like how are you both that aesthetic

that is a huge honour!!! i guess i do try and reflect myself a bit in my drawings - i will tell you. i am obsessed with bright colours, and i always want to just surround myself by them. glad you dig it! 💛💚💙💜

anonymous: Hey! You're one of my favorite artists/people! You have such a creative mind, and your bright colors and fun smooth line art makes me happy every time I see it! I am a huge fan!!!! 

hi! thank you oodles! that’s bananas. im very very honoured. thank you so much for sending such good vibes my way!!! ✨✨✨

anonymous: Hi, ur doing great and I luv u and ur art!! <3 <3

thank you!!! much love right back ATCHA!!! 💖💖💖

anonymous: I once saw someone who looked like they were legitimately one of your drawings that had come to life. I don't know quite how to explain them, except that everything about them looked reminded me of your art!

that is seriously awesome. not to toot my own horn, but i bet that person looked awesome! and im really honoured that you thought of me, thank you so much!

anonymous: Seeing your art pop up on my dash always makes me so happy. It radiates brightness and good things. I hope you have a good day today. 💜

getting messages like this always brighten my day -- thank you so much. that really means a lot -- all i ever really want from my art is to make people happy. myself, sure, since a lot of the time im drawing bright and cheery stuff to try and make myself feel better, so knowing that maybe a little bit of that might get someone else to smile? the best. the best ever. thank you!!! 💕💖💗

anonymous: WOWOWOW i love your art and the musicals you draw are a1 i’m so happy

THANK YOU!!! :D i’m glad you like it, and yep, i’m pretty fond of the musicals i do fanart for too! 🌞🎵🌞🎵🌞🎵

anonymous: Ok but your ot3 drawings of SpongeBob, Sandy, and Patrick are giving me new will to live they're so cute and bubbly and I can't express with words how much I enjoy looking at them sorry if that sounds creepy I just mean to say you're an amazing artist and have a good day!!!

that doesnt sound creepy at all -- this is so sweet and kind of you to say!!! you’re an absolute GEM, lovely stranger, whoever you are. i’m glad you like the OT3 drawings, i really gotta do more! those 3 together really make me happy and give me new will to keep going, to create stuff that might keep the good vibes going. thank you so much!!! 🤗🌟🍒

anonymous: I just love the way each of the characters you draw has a distinct style and facial features. They all look so different, individual, and dynamic. Keep up the awesome work ♡

aw thank you so much!!! this is something i really want to work on a bit more, sometimes i feel i do fall into have characters all look a bit similar -- but i’m glad and honoured that you see some distinction between them, that means a ton! thank you! 👍🌠👌

[minblush]

don't worry i feel the same way!! i was so looking forward to gayo's because of the song covers, and they didn't this time :( i mean i still appreciate the performances they gave us, they did a great job, but i am kind of sad too. it's just so exciting seeing them take on another groups style

yeah of course they still worked hard and delivered some amazing performances skdjkasd, but also despite different instrumentals and stuff, it’s still all performances we’ve seen many times before except for the short intros skdjakd but yeah i agree

Anonymous said:I was upset they haven’t done any special stages too :( I always look forward to them and enjoy them the most. ahh I just can’t get used to the change

we literally got so many legendary performances from these year end things that i still think about all the time, it’s a bit sad yeah dakjsd i liked these performances but also like, i doubt anyone will remember them or look for them two years from now on unlike the previous stages

Anonymous said:I totally feel ya.. I was really excited to see some solo stages nd im just dissapointed. Because they equally worked hard for all the performances they put out as a group, as rap line, vocal line. But each member cud have done smething solo for atleast a few seconds, just like Tae today. Donno wat bighit is upto but i dearly hope they don’t go with usual kpop popular grp paths.

i mean they had those short intros like jimin and hobi did, but yeah for the most part… :( honestly i think it’s a combination of them being really busy and also being so big now they just don’t have to do these stages anymore? cause for groups the special stages are a way to promote themselves and create buzz for the general public, so maybe bighit feels with all the massive exposure they now got in korea, that they don’t have to make the boys learn 6 new choreos over a month anymore? on one hand good cause they won’t be as exhausted, but i feel like there is still room for some special stuff… but also i want to ask you, is there really anything anymore that makes you think like they aren’t proceeding like other groups? what sets them apart anymore? tbh

Anonymous said:yoongi didnt write his part in mic drop? i dont know a lot of things about them omg do u mind spilling more tea? if u dont want to its okay i know u could get hate :( but i would rly like to know more about it

no he didn’t write it, rapline hasn’t written a lot of their parts in the last album sadly, you can just check the credits on albums if you want to see! that info is out there. and about tea, i really meant it like, there are things i also wish i didn’t know? so i’m not going to pass them on, sorry ;-;

Anonymous said:I think that’s why a lot of fans coming from HYYH era and even WINGS felt a bit let down with this album. My worry is that as they get bigger, they’ll eventually become what they had tried NOT to become which is another overly produced Kpop boy band with tons of external producers, composers etc. If Sea and the Outro (tho I didn’t like this outro) hadn’t been on this album, I’d have honestly started to lose faith in Bangtan’s sound moving forward. I rlly hope their next album is different (2/2)

ah sorry i didn’t get the first part? but i get what you’re saying because i’ve shared the same sentiment and talked about it a lot when the album came out. honestly i feel like they kinda reached the point you’re talking about with that album, external producers, less involvement from members, less substance lyrics wise. and honestly.. i wouldn’t hold my breath for any improvement? because yoongi said himself in the billboard interview, that they definitely do not want to ruffle any feathers with their -social criticism- that they want to bring people together instead, so with that we’ll just get very vague things and messages like -love yoursef- from now on, and considering the more personal lyrics had been hidden and kind of treated as just something for fans and not the real album material as well, like that just confirms it for me? so i just hope the songs will be bops, i hope bighit will stop media playing and exaggerating so i don’t have to feel all jaded, and i will just look forward to their mixtapes, solo work, hidden tracks where they will be able to express themselves more.. cause from how bighit had been acting and what has been said, i doubt we’ll go back to how things used to be anymore? but i’m also a huge pessimist sorry dakjsd i would love to be wrong

Anonymous said:hi i agree so much with what you said re: the boys involvement like… in the summer package how namjoon said yoongi writes what ~200 songs a year?? and looking at the credits for ly:h and how he had barely involvement it just breaks my heart that yoongi (and namjoon and hoseok and god knows whom else) are probably working so hard writing an dproducing and ur telling me not one of those songs was included… as oppose to prior albums… in favor of (imo djghdjfg) subpar tracks god its upsetting

Anonymous said:and as a follow on like… i cant help but feel sad that an album they barely contirbuted to is winning them all these accolades compared to the albums they were heavily involved in like.. idk how they feel about it but 2 me thats…. yikes

i think it’s unfair i believe their material would be better received anyway, like are you telling me yoongi didn’t make songs that are better than what the chainsmokers did? -.- idk i feel like bighit is making a mistake by trying to make the boys as universally appealing as possible when their underdog and difference from other kpop groups was what made a lot of people check them out in the first place… i get they can’t really act antiestablishment at his point even for show since they go around advertising even banks and mcdonalds and stuff, but how was her as an album at least, any different from what other groups do now? like seventeen or even exo musically, ykwim? lots of group throw in  a few writing credits in every now and then now for more credibility, but is that enough with bangtan? is that fair to them as artists? when in the past it was so different? 3: and yeah i’m so proud and happy for them but i also wish wings for example had been rewarded this way cause that was really the peak for the boys as musicians and as a group that is above the general kpop formula ;-; 

[unproduciblesmackdown]

yknow for a while i’ve been like “haha this thing abt me seems similar to my weird memory” and it is finally occuring to me that the things are so similar they might be actually related

like its hard to say your memory is different from other ppls coz yknow you can’t rly tell how other ppl remember stuff but i’ve got that ol “grew up in a world of regular trauma exposure” memory where u can short term forget stuff p easily but also looking back on stuff is difficult. like, in ways i’ve got a great memory, i’ve been able to study for tests like at lunch beforehand and do great, i’ve got a couple visual memories from when i was 2, and all kinds of old memories and things i remember in great detail but also, like, if i think back on My Life, it feels like all the memories are just kinda this inert block that’s sitting a ways over there. it isn’t that i think any memories are inaccessible or anything, it can just really hard to be able to get to some of them w/o a direct prompt. and usually its only like that, kinda accessing shit piece by piece, not really feeling like u can easily see this whole cohesive timeline or anything. i can tend to forget obvious or major facts all the time. i’ll be like, oh yeah, i took dance lessons for 11 yrs, right. allegedly i existed in elementary school—it doesnt feel like it, but i remember it, and i can get memories coming in if i think abt it but like. yknow. middle school too, that really happened? i can remember it better obv but jeez. college even. it’s like ur just kinda isolated in the present. (also tho: some memories are probably mostly trashed coz like. 2013 was such garbage that i really hardly remember anything particular. i can kinda Place it in time b/c i remember something specific that happened in nov or dec. i remember other particularly crap things but like. not much to go on there. but i don’t mind coz there was really not much worth remembering. that’s kinda the point, you get good at shrugging off things that happened asap so you can move past it and out of the “im experiencing trauma” mode as soon as u can coz u just gotta. and then it also means that i can be thinking of something and then get distracted by one thing and literally 5 seconds later i’ve completely forgotten what i’d been thinking abt before. shit gets compartmentalized and shoved into storage real fast and not all of it is within arms reach

anyways the things that are so similar it might be kinda an alternate form of the Same Issue: the way i’m NEVER able to answer “what’s your favorite book/movie/song/etc” type questions!! i can’t even do like, top 5 type things. its like when i Have to think about what books i’ve read and enjoyed, suddenly i’m drawing a lot of blanks on what i’ve ever read. or watched or listened to or anything. and like i KNOW there’s shit i’ve super enjoyed even for a long time but just can’t think of in the moment. it’s that “my favorite book is the book i just read” type thing

and then also it even feels relevant how i’m like incapable of creativity. i don’t have these cohesive Well to draw on of sources of inspiration. i can only think of specific things and then get stuck on it. its kinda ridiculous like even when i try to be ~creative~ as an abstract exercise i p much get nowhere. there’s other reasons behind this too i know, but it does feel very similar in some ways to this junk. i don’t really mind it tho cuz yknow...im not of the mindset that being a Creator is the be all and end all of any sort of vaguely artistic pursuit so i’m good if i am never hit w any divine inspiration for the greatest story ever coz...im not coming up w fuckall by myself that’s for sure. my contributions lie elsewhere