#im mobile so typo hell

[halfdent]

How Harvey should have been after having people put shit in his brain and /or try to look inside it constantly , including his best friend who performed brain surgery without his consent ; maybe Two-Face has a point

At least Bruce apologised to Two-Face that was very sweet thank you very cool .

[its--ali]

weed my beloved

[rainbowbutterfrosting]

:O!!!!!

Is there a scientific reason I get really sleepy when people show me affection

[cantwritethetword]

Biceps? Really?

Fic Descript: Superman finds out Batman has a very odd ticklish spot, and of course has to tease Bruce half to death over it.

~A/N  - HELLO ONCE AGAIN

Look at me being somewhat consistent with uploads SDJFHKALSDFJHKH amazing what meds can do

I've had these requests in my inbox for aaaaaages (im so sorry) and I feel like I can finally write something for them.

Prompts were:

Please excuse the typos and the "it's ok that this will be s(H)ort" cause that was back when I was like super burnt out AND unmedicated lmao so I was like OH JUST A LIL FIC YOU CAN DO IT but this will be a proper one lmao

Also lmao forgive me for the super boring title I couldn't think of another one.

EDIT: ALSO AGSKAGSKAGD ILL HAVE IT BE KNOWN I USE DARK MODE ON MOBILE THIS WAS ON MY LAPTOP AND IDK HOW TO GET TUMBLR TO BE DARK MODE ON LAPTOP HENCE THE WHITE SCREENSHOTS THANK YOU THAT IS ALL

- Enoy! ~

Tag List: @constanteyeburn

Masterpost Link 

"I still..." Bruce huffed as he lay on the floor, glaring at his partner. "Don't get... why you're still so surprised... every time we do this."

Clark, the absolute puppy dog, was still beaming after launching yet another random tickle attack on Bruce. Since first discovering the Batman's hilarious (and quite frankly adorable) little weakness, it was like crack for Clark. Any time he had the opportunity, he launched himself at Bruce and just started squeezing. And, because Bruce was just that damn ticklish, the poor superhero couldn't last ten seconds before crumbling into a flood of chuckles.

"I don't know." Clark grinned. "You don't seem like the ticklish type, is all. Never have."

Bruce rolled his eyes, before starting to stand up. "I am not the ticklish type."

"Uh, oh yes you are!" Clark laughed, reaching to grab Bruce's arm. "And where do you think you're going?"

Normally, Bruce's response to this would be a swift bat (hehe) at Clark's hand to push it away from him as he stood, and an even swifter escape before Clark decided to go for round 2 (it had happened before, and Bruce swore he would've passed out if Clark hadn't taken pity on him).

But this time, whatever way Clark grabbed Bruce's arm, sent electric shivers coursing down Bruce's side. Bruce let out a yelp, and half-collapsed onto one knee.

Clark gasped, his face like a kid on Christmas morning. "No way."

"Clark." Bruce's eye's widened as he pieced together what had just happened. "That wasn't-"

"Wasn't what?" Clark interjected, pulling Bruce closer to him using the aforementioned grabbed bicep.

The tugging motion pressed Clark's fingers right into Bruce's muscle again, forcing a symphony of strange noises, squeaks, and choked laughs out of the absolutely screwed superhero. As Bruce fell, Clark expertly manoeuvered him onto his back (for the second time that day) so that Clark could kneel on his forearms.

"What the hell Kent?" Bruce grunted, pulling his tough-guy facade over his currently anxious and flustered self. "Let me go."

Clark chuckled. "Oh no, we're investigating this."

Bruce cursed under his breath. He remembered Clark's methodical tickle monster days all too well. When Superman himself had him pinned to the floor with no hope of escape, and took his sweet ass time tracing and prodding with various numbers of fingers on any tickle spot that came to mind.

This time would be no different. Clark began with his thumbs, massaging small circles into the very center of Bruce's muscle.

And holy fuck did it tickle.

Bruce's entire torso tried to lift itself off the floor for a moment, his eyes wide in shock at just how bad it was, before his body slammed back onto the floor and flailed. His legs kicked a ticklish drum beat as the highest pitched giggle either man had ever heard escaped his lips.

"Wow you're ticklish here!" Clark laughed over the noise. "I can't believe this is even possible!"

"SHUTUP!" Bruce shouted between bouts of hysterics, twisting his hips from side to side to alleviate the torturous sensations.

"Seriously though," Clark continued as if nothing was even happening. "Ticklish biceps? You've got to be kidding me."

"CLARK!"

Superman nodded to himself, resting his hands on his thighs. "You're right, you're right, it's time to move on to something else."

Bruce gulped in mouthfuls of air before registering what Clark was implying. "No-... wait-..."

Ten feather-light fingernails touched down right above Bruce's armpit and paused for a moment, soaking in the anticipation. Clark didn't have a chance to start moving before Bruce broke into deep streams of laughter.

"Really, Batman?" Clark taunted. "Breaking that easily?"

"Fuhuhuck ohoff."

Superman rolled his eyes, before trailing down Bruce's biceps from elbow to underarm. That singular smooth movement upped Bruce's laughter by a few pitches, a good sign for what was to come.

Clark lifted his hands and reset them back to their starting position on Bruce's arm, before letting his fingers begin their descent once more.

Except this time, each finger took its turn to softly trace up a few inches before lifting and straightening again while his wrist moved further to Bruce's elbow. Like two gliding spiders, Clark's hands pulled downright squeals from Bruce.

"NOHO!" The Batman pleaded. "I CAHAN'T- CAHAN'T TAKE IHIT!"

Smirking, Clark tutted. "Oh come on, you're usually so tough!"

But, now that he thought about it, Bruce was rather red by this point (and not just from sheer embarrassment). And while it certainly was fun tormenting the usually far too stoic superhero, the fun could wait for another day.

Clark wasn't forgetting about this any time soon.

[the-s1lly-corner]

Hello how are you :3? I was wondering if you could write E.J., Hoodie, and Masky with a s/o that has a lot of scars? (Toby too but platonic for him) I’m not sure how many people we can request so if it’s too many just Hoodie? I’m sorry if this makes you uncomfortable and thank you!

Various!Creepypastas w/ a scarred!reader

waaaah im so sorry for not seeing this sooner! i didnt recieve a notification for this ask!! really theres no limit to how many characters you can send in! i think my personal max varies from prompt to prompt!! mix of how they approach the concept of a scarred lover (friend in tobys case) with some hints of fluff! cause of scars will be vague as admittedly i didnt know if you meant general scars or SH! side note i hope this posts right! im writing this on my computer, im used to mobile!! + apologies for any weird wording or typos, im listening to music and im getting hyped!! not proof read we die like my spiderverse brainrot

Includes: Eyeless Jack, Hoodie, Masky and Platonic!Toby!

CWs: touch and go talk of potential past trauma, body image issues, vague mentions of SH(?) in EJs part + Toby's parts

admittedly admin doesnt know if its technically SH due to the nature and motiv but personally id still count it as such and tag it as such

Eyeless Jack;

he gets it, he really does. the basic run down of my hc/take on ej is that he wasnt always some flesh eating monster; just some dude who got caught up in some bad stuff

so naturally, he doesnt... really vibe well with the concept of eating human flesh, which can lead to a few... instances. from intentionally to accidentally harming himself while hes lost in his instincts

so hes no stranger to being a little roughed up around the edges

but hes a stranger to comforting; he'll likely approach it from a logical side before trying anything else. "you've been hurt," before going on a small tangent about the formation of scars. hes not the most... emotionally... good... available... person

so youre going to need to lay out the general basis for what you need for basic comfort, on days where your scars become an issue; be is needing comfort or a distraction. it may take him a while, but hell eventually start to pick up on cues and hints as your relationship develops

otherwise hes very neutral about them, again approaching them with a blunt view; seeing it as neither good nor bad. he doesnt draw attention to them, but he doesnt act like theyre gross

really just. vibing with it, doesnt make a huge deal of it since he feels he doesnt have any place to judge, nor does he feel its his business to pry for information

solid 6/10 imo, hell comfort you if you express that you need it but hell likely not go out of his way to do it

Hoodie;

Soft touches, he almost does it before he has your permission to touch you

naturally he has his own fair share of scars from various.. activities

really im still all jumbled up with how i wanna write him and masky; not sure if i want to make them like how they are in their MH source or lean into the proxy thing that was prominent in the early days of the fandom... lowkey leaning into the proxy thing for this post because im more... versed..? in that, but anyhow

hes more upfront and compassionate than eyeless jack, in fact hes probably the most caring out of the four in todays post... maybe thats because i read one (1) fic years back that changed my entire approach to his character but! yeah

subconsciously trails his hands on them when the two of you are holding one another; something gentle and intimate, not too obnoxious to make you self conscious, but not careful enough to go unnoticed

i view hoodie, and by extension brian if i end up considering him and tim fully seperate from their 'proxy' parts, as a very tactile person

true to the popular fanon interpretation, hoodie doesnt speak much. but that only makes him a better listener, so on days where things get hard, hell let you talk his ears off with anything thats bothering you. very rarely, hell speak up and offer some words of advice, most times hell inch closer to grasp you. though it does get awkward since most the time hes just. blankly staring at you silently without emoting or saying a word

overall? personally hes a 7/10 for me, i would rank him higher if he were more verbal, but thats just because admin has an easier time venting if its a two way convo; but overall hell make sure that your scars dont effect your worth

Masky;

very similarly to hoodie, masky also has his own set of scars for the same reasons

he probably starts pointing out his own scars to you and mumbles about where they came from if he knows their origins

this doesnt mean "oh hes invalidating your experiences and hes trying to make it about himself," but more so "hes showing that he really does get it and he doesnt mean to talk over you"

much like EJ he approaches scars with a very blunt and upfront mindset, but to a lesser extent. he admits that whatever led up to the tissue forming, it hurt. emotionally and physically, and hes not going to deny that simple fact. hell listen to you, have a conversation with you about it, and try to help you through whatever you may be currently going through regardless of if youre injury is relevant.

or at least, thats what hes trying to do.

hes still has his own personal issues regarding going about his own problems in a healthy manner but hey thats something for another post; maybe, if i remember

honestly this post doesnt have enough fluff imo, and i can kinda see masky doing this, but imagine he boops his mask against your scars in a mockery of a kiss (doesnt take off his mask often, in fact youll probably never ever see him without it on), i can see jack doing this too tbh

thoughts? 8/10, gets the bonus points for being less awkward to rant to imo, plus i think asides ej, i think i have a bias for masky for the simple fact i had the fattest crush on him when i was in middle school

Toby;

okay! this one is going to be interesting for one main reason! i actually havent touched tobys character in YEARS! so hes probably going to have the shorter list... obligatory i havent built any solid hcs for him past what was going on in the fandom in the 2010s, before toby briefly became a mild discomfort... but we're back in business baby!! (^^ dont feel bad for requesting for toby btw! hes no longer a discomfort, and if i didnt want to write for him i wouldnt be including him right here!!)

obviously we cant talk about his part without talking about his cheek. and other, similar hcs. while i dont think most of the self inflicted marks on his body were from a place of.. for lack of better words, darkness; it doesnt change the fact he still has them. i think a lot of them are from the fact he cant feel anything; accidental burns, gnawing through his cheek, digging his fingers deep into himself. really i could go into detail, but due to the aforementioned fact that my take on him isnt as developed as other characters + i really dont think its appropriate for this post (or really, anywhere on this account,), ill stop there

while he cant relate to the physical pain of what caused your scars, he can sympathize through your feelings. do you feel sorrow, or anger to whoever hurt you? hell be getting worked up right with you, because to him youre one of his closest friends

i feel like he doesnt talk much about his past, regarding his family. but hed tell you, and you can sure as hell bet that hell do his absolute damndest to grant you the same feeling of security.

hell probably touch and prod without truly meaning any harm, but thats because he can have problems with boundaries, but hell listen if you sit him down and tell him it makes you uncomfortable if it does

more so emotional than outwardly... supportive? idk the words, but hes very empathetic with you and tries to relate to you through emotion rather than feeling what you felt. honestly? kinda based for that, but maybe thats because i dont see feelings about this topic being touched on, usually its straight up about how the scar makes the person look or the physical trauma they had gone through, but idk, maybe thats just a me thing

he can be an asshole at times but hell usually backtrack and cool off somewhere else if you call him out on it imo

not sure if its because as im LITERALLY investigating his characteristics and interpretations as we speak, but i think im starting to relate to him so ER-OH!

anyways, i wish i could make his segment more... in tune with the characters above but its probably going to take me a while until im comfortable with how i portray this dude, which sucks because as a kid he was probably one of my favorites

i dont think im going to give toby a rating like the others; since i dont think i can accurate rate him due to the lack of proper concrete ideas outside of him being empathetic to your emotional pain since he cant relate on how much it hurt

im gonna end this here since im starting to sound like a broken record on tobys part so!

i hope you enjoyed this! characterization may be a little off but i blame that mostly on the fact that i kinda fell out of the loop in regards for writing for these guys (that damn spider movie! the brainrot threw me off my creepypasta grind!/j) but its good to be back writing for this fandom! it was a fun little brain exercise trying to figure out each character goes about this kind of thing without making them all the same!! with that being said, im going to go listen to an audio reading of tobys story so i can regrounded in his character and hopefully do him some justice in the future!

[thehypnone]

Hi Hypnone (it took me like four times to type that because my head has been a bit fuzzy all day so I'm sorry if its wrong) I saw your post earlier from the zoo and first off it looks like you had so much fun all the animals are so cute 💜 second I have a question from one hypermoblie person to another, what are the best things to get to help with pain and hyper extending? I haven't found anything that actually helps and my knees have been hurting since January.

I want to get things to help because it's hard to do things most days but I live in the US and work part time because that's all I can do right now so I don't have a lot of money to get stuff. I've wanted to ask for a while but have been too nervous to.

You can ignore this if you want I just thought I would finally rip off the band-aid and ask.

🕸️

first of all hypnone is correct, but even if, you dont ever have to worry about typos or anything in my asks!!! i did have fun at the zoo even though im absolutely out of use today because of all the walking

now, i know mobility aids situation in the US absolutely sucks, so unfortunately i can't help you with any technicalities. im sure there are some cheat codes, im just not that familiar with your stuff as im from europe. the type of braces i have that youve seen on the zoo pictures help a lot with hyperextending, dislocations and general knee pain but also with my posture altogether. which positively surprised me when i got them. unfortunately i dont have any tips for pain management or anything, im sorry. braces would for sure help you but theyre expensive as hell :(

i wish i could help some more, sorry :/

but also never be afraid to send me an ask or a message, im glad you did that even tho im not much of help :3

[byz-was-here]

"So, what do you have outlined for the fic?"

Me: Outline? the hell's an outline? I just fire up a wordprocessor and type while daydreaming until i hit an arbitrary word count.

I literally have no idea what a chapter's gonna contain until I write it. I'm writing on zero impulse control and hyperfixation.

I do 90% of my writing on my phone vecause insp seems to hit me anywhere but my desk. (I do final edits on pc to catch most of the fat fingered typos. Im not dumb ennough to fully create and post chapters on mobile)

I do not know if this normal, but the most i have in terms of planning is a bullet point sheet with "Neat shower thoughts" in random order that I may or may not shoehorn in at some random point, and some chat logs with my beta reader where I ramble like a madman after work because my brain is jello. (@avita-tales if you're reading this. Thank you so much for putting up with me. )

Like, do all yall actually have fully fleshed out drafts n outlines? that's a thing?

"I can't wait to find out what's next!"

me too, reader. Me too.

[ultra-rage]

Bro I'm always mobile. Save me from this typo hell.

(( GHHSDGSD, Im so sorry. I can't. I have dyslexia. i didn't even notice the typos until after I posted it LOL.

[tacticalvalor]

«────── « HEADCANON » ──────»

so!! i finished watching runs of phantom liberty... and vin's getting a new canon. this dlc and its new ending are canon for him.

note: i also have to update some canon bios but... shh ♡ also ty ty i'm safe the tornado didn't hit near me. there will be typos here tho because i'm too tired and i'm on mobile.

i just think the storyline does a great job at showing what vin really wants, and what it takes for him to realize that.

dlc storyline spoilers under the cut, even if they're pretty out of context/explained horribly.

when this happens is after? you talk to the vdb. so vin's already been up shit's creek by this point. there's the shit with ev. the shit with takemura. the shit with the cados. he's been tugged around.

and then? then his relic gets hacked! and he's told to get his ass to the most dangerous part of nc? alone? yeah. yeah. he's not happy. johnny isn't either, but at this point vin's at a low and honestly could see him following songbird hoping to die.

and then he gets everything thrown on him.

hey i need your help saving the president.

hey im the president i need your help getting out of here, the attack came from the inside and i dont trust anybody.

hey your now a federal intelligence agent and tour making contact with a sleeper agent bc my runner that contacted you went missing thx.

he's already there, fuck it. maybe some gonk-brain will kill him. but. but!

there is a part of him still kinda hopeful. maybe one more step and he gets the help he needs. one more contact. one more task. and it just. keeps. going.

he's pulled into the monotonous bullshit he tried so hard to escape from. being pulled around on all these fronts again, especially as it comes out songbird is the traitor; this has been in the works for what? months now? because she knows about militech's own version of soulkiller and she, being led on by meyers, was used as a bow and made a portal for the blackwall to conduct govt espionage.

and naturally, vin's a little upset (he's a lot upset), but fuck if he doesn't need that tech. and it's a hell of a lot better than the prognosis anyone else has given him so far!

but it just. keeps. getting. worse!

songbird leaves him for dead. reed is stonewalling him. alex is fucking dead. johnny's quieter than usual. he's all alone in fucking dogtown and the only person he feels REMOTE TRUST for is feeding him nothing||. and it sucks! but he's still trying to believe that he'll get that out.

and there's so many good convos with the characters in this dlc about morality, mortality, and consequence.

and it ultimately ends with vin trusting reed and them breaking songbird outta maxtac custody, bc surprise the blackwall connection makes you go cyberpsycho. and she makes it to the derelict militech lab that u go into alone alone, bc johnny gets sliced and ur comms are fucked. and there's this whole sequence of almost dying, being hunted alien isolation style by a blackwall ai controlled spider mech, and then you find songbird and she BEGS YOU to kill her. BEGS. and vin just... cant.

it's ironic coming from him considering so many of his dumb decisions are an expression of his suicidality, but he helps. he continues to help!

and even after, he's treated like shit. reed keeps stonewalling him. president myers is a cunt who cordially reminds him of the oath he took and the nice, tight leash she has around his neck.

and then? when he's finally "rescued"? ||he doesnt even say goodbye to anyone. and that hurts the most. arasaka ending sucked, sure, but this? no rooftop talk with misty. no goodbye to vik. just a text explaining he'll be outta town for a bit. and then it ends up being TWO YEARS. HE'S IN A COMA FOR TWO YEARS. ALONE. IN LANGLEY.

and when he wakes up, reed continues. to. stonewall. him. keeps it vague. apologizes, sure, but even now he cannot bring himself to actually care. which is understandable when you look at his character but. vin is livid.

there was no closure. no guarantee he'd even wake up. he could have up and died and nobody would ever fucking know!

and then he gets back to nc and... oh.

oh things changed. things really changed:

vik became a corpo doc, working for some zetatech corp. he says he didn't have a choice.

misty is just gone. you run into her after getting jumped by street mercs, and she's on her way to poland.

arasaka? fucking gone. takemura and hanako went into everything alone and *hanako just up and fucking died.* no explanation. dunno if yori killed her or what. but takemura is in hiding now bc they believe he killed hanako *and* saburo. then yori stepped down as ceo all together.

didnt see the others' calls so idk what happens with panam, judy, and river, but it can't be much better for them.

and i just... the whole idea of vin being forced into the background being both a relief and a terror to him is so... it's so good. the idea that he lost everything again, but he now has control over that.

it fucks him up, that's for sure. the dialog you have with reed? with vik? with misty? some real shit. he's on the verge of that suicidality again, but he lived. he can live. he has control over that now.

and it's for the first time in a long time, considering the fact he worked with arasaka counter-intel. he awaited death for so long, knowing it could come at any second, that there's a... bitterness. in losing that feeling. a confusion in the fact he can just. exist without consequence.

this is really the meat of it tho. the last bit. the fact that vin is both the exact same man he was and someone entirely new.

the fact that he changed and didn't. that he's messy and there is no truly happy ending for him, that he's just... human.

that in the end, he still fucked over johnny (except at least in the arasaka ending, he was kinda understanding to a point. here? he's just angry. dejected. vin's last words to him were that he couldn't forgive him for the shit he's done to his body) and still LOST the game of life.

he still lost. but he lost in the best way possible.

the legend of v is out there, but he doesn't have to be that. live up to it. he can just be... him. and i think that's all he really wants, in the end. to learn who he is and to be him. a chance to just exist without consequence. to not have to make choices on who gets harmed and why. to make choices of dire urgency. to just... breathe.

it just took so much for him to realize that, and it's going to weigh on him for god knows how long (if not his whole life, whatever remains of it).

[horsebeast]

a finger on the monkeys paw curled when young naive teenage me wanted more ni no kuni games. now look where we are

[sisterlelianas]

.

[directdogman]

MISTER DOGMAN HELLO! i was playing through dialtown again recently because i love it a whole lot and i realized something. let me preface this with im not accusin you anything at all but in the part where gingi asked if they could keep the raccoon, the word "coon" was used to shorten the word. i just wanted to let you know that the word "coon" is an antiblack slur used again black people and you should probably change that to something else because i don't think you were aware of the harmful meaning it has ! (sorry for the long ask and sorry if there's any typos, as of writing this it's fairly early and i can't find my glasses- hope you're having a good day/night)

...huh. Yeah, initially it's just a case of me not knowing about that word, given it's a regional slur and I simply was looking for a way to shorten the word 'raccoon'. I really appreciate bringing this to me with sensitivity and not assuming I was intentionally trying to do harm. But, yeah, once it was pointed out to me, I removed the word from the game with my apologies. There were one or two of these other cases in-game too. I'm a little confused because I remember patching it out already. What version of DT are you playing? PC or Mobile? If you're playing on PC, have you updated it? If you're playing on Mobile, have you downloaded the new build on the GJ page? If you haven't updated it on PC, or are playing on mobile and haven't redownloaded it since I released it on GJ a few days ago, yeah, do so. Lots of extra content/bugfixes! (If you ARE playing on the latest version, please lemme know so I can investigate this/see why the hell the word's still in my game.)

[tortilla-of-courage]

The only reason I bully/ whatever I do to the typo thing is to point it out, because the only way to improve the hell that is English is practice and having someone to point out your mistakes. apostrophes, yes part of proper grammar, separate the one word form the other so putting it in is kinda useless, also typing fast is bond to have a typo or two. Also I will go by typo anon.

oh yeah for sure! learning a language is all about practice and patience, that's the one thing I've learned in my 15+ years of learning english. but also like, depending on context I'll be more careful with my wording or not. like on a casual conversation or whatever here in my blog for example, I'll try and keep it decent enough that everyone (including people who might not fully dominate english that might follow me) can understand my posts for the most part, but also might just forego a thing or two in favour of speed (specially since for some reason i get like 30 asks a day nowadays??? not sure why). in an academic text I'll overthink every word i use tho lmao and will check that every punctuation choice makes sense.

also in general fixing typoes in the tags is a PAIN specially in a really long tag on mobile so i usually just. don't bother to fix it

anyways spelling/grammar checks are appreciated, though usually im like 90% conscious of any misspellings i make aha

[funamusea-translations]

Okay I got a few asks about this so im gonna answer everything in a single post also im on mobile if you see a typo is the autocorrect

Wadonara world is a section of Satanick world, as it has an angel land (ruled by fumus) and an demon land (ruled by satanick), commonly heaven and hell. But their world has more lands that dont belong to neither these creatures. Its explained in the reboot bonus scenes

All non human characters have magic powers on their own and they live longer than their irl equivalents just because they're fictional creatures (but if you find some irl humanoid shark do tell me I need to do researchs)

I hope this clears everything

-Mod Sataneko

[rogerina-yee-haw]

can you do something with reader and ben in college together? with lots of fluff+smut!!!

*this pic gives me strong college!ben vibes and dont even ask me why* *cr to the owner of the pic*

hope you'll enjoy!! i tried my best (it's bad)

also I can't insert the "keep reading" link from the mobile app SORRY

(also i dont know a lot abt college system in the UK/USA so get ready to see some inaccuracies lmao)

warnings: suggestive themes, fluff, language, typos

so

you and ben met during your first year in college

at first you thought he was just another fuck boy on your way

boy you were wrong

he was actually very shy and sweet

and was scared as hell to make a first move

so after three months of stealing glances during lectures, classes and parties

after an impromptu scene you shared together at your drama class

ben finally gathered himself

he came up to you during the lunch break, while you were eating and chatting with your friends

and asked you on a date

"y/n, would you like to-"

"yes"

you answered too fast

but you both were pretty excited

your first date was rather cliché: you went to see the new marvel movie that just came out

"i wanna be in one of those, y'know"

"you'll be there, ben. we all will be"

you were fresh out of high school and so was ben

and you knew each other for like ninety days

but you both felt like you've been together for centuries

you were talking about everything

starting from discussing your homework

and finishing with talking about time-travelling

"ben, you will change the future if you fly back to 2005 and tell your best friend to shut the fuck up"

"it's worth trying though, he was talking shit about that fantastic four movie!"

yeah, ben's a huge marvel fan

you were kissing and holding hands all the time

touching each other

ben's hand was over your shoulders, in the back pocket of your jeans (my inner lara jean jumped out lol)

you've learnt the good way the he enjoyed when you played with his hair

or when you tugged on it whenever he ate you out

about sex btw

you were both young and inexperienced

but you liked to explore each other's bodies

you've learnt your kinks, stuff you didn't like and things you were pretty okay with

and you've also been slowly falling head over heels for each other

because you knew you found your soulmates

tried to write something after long absence and this is SHIT im so sorry

[ghisborne]

update... kinda?

im on mobile so forgive any weird typos or it's incoherent/all over the place but i just kind of wanted to ramble a bit, have a stream of consciousness, whatever you wanna call it about just where ive kinda been lately and why i haven't been so prominent online in a while

firstly, im perfectly aware that all of this may not seem like a big deal or its a common problem amongst 20 somethings but i dont care because this is just on my mind a lot lately and i just wanna get it out.

i finished college for my associates degree at the end of march. the graduation ceremony is in june and i gotta get my cap and gown this month, which is all fine and dandy. thats not where im struggling. ive been wanting to see a therapist for my anxiety and depression for literally years but i havent been able to afford it or know where to look. im on my dad's medical for another couple of years so i asked him to see if his medical had mental health benefits and he has yet to look as far as im aware. which sucks a lot, obv.

so because im sitting here anxious and depressed almost 24/7 i think. a lot.

i went to college for graphic design because of my gif making. i wanted to do music as my career but because of the depression (and small hands) i just kind of abandoned my guitar and spent a lot of time making gifs. i thought id found something else i could do for the rest of my life because i was exposed to making logos and calendars and magazines and really enjoyed it! i met some of my closest friends (and we still talk/hang out) but im not sure thats what i want to do anymore. i havent been practicing/honing my craft because i simply don't think my stuff is good enough. i know i shouldnt compare myself to others but looking at/working with other people is a huge part of the industry. im not very artistic so my stuff isnt as unique as a lot of my friends' stuff.

idk long story short, i just dont know what i want to do anymore so i just sit and play video games because it's mindless sometimes and i dont have to think as much.

i avoid photoshop because my computer can't handle it anymore and i dont have the money to get a new one and i dont have the money because im anxious as hell about getting just any old job. i dont mind working wherever rn but working at walmart last summer really kinda scared me and its dumb.

it all boils down to my anxiety and depression taking over my life and its hard to come on here and make gifs like nothing is going on.

im aware how dramatic this sounds but i just hate where im at rn and idk what to do about it.

im not asking for answers or anything really, i just wanted to get this off my chest even if it didn't make any sense.