#im litterally so swag

[spacetodd68]

breaking into ur askbox to tell you that i have located you teehee giggle (its cat btw hi) off i go

hi yes hello I drew you /j

[ajarorworms]

SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LISTEN TO ME

I LOVE KRIS AND PAINTBRUSH AND TWO AND FRISK AND SEAM AND NAPSTABLOOK BUT...

DO YOU REALISE HOW FUCKING AMAZING IT WOULD BE IF THE CHOSEN ONE WAS THE @nonbiney-swag-competition WINNER, THIS FUCKING STICK FIGURE WHO DEBUT IN LIKE- THE LATE 2000S- WHO LITTERALLY NOBODY KNOWS??? LIKE I DONT GIVE A FLYING FUCK IF PEOPLE HAVE NO CLUE WHO ALAN BECKER IS AND IF THEY'VE ONLY WATCHED ANIMATIONS VS MINECRAFT AND HAVENT ACTUALLY SEE THE CHOSEN ONE- WHEN THE NEXT ROUND OF VOTES IS UP AND CHOSENS THERE, ISTG YALL- ALAN BECKERS MARY SUE OVER POWERED STICK FIGURE NEEDS TO WIN THIS SHIT

I WANNA SEE THE CHOSEN ONE AND PAINTBRUSH FIGHT TO THE FUCKING DEATH, LISTEN TO ME, DO YOU REALISE HOW FUCKIGN AWESOME IT WOIKD BE, THEY'RE BOTH TALL AND THEY HAVE FIRE, DO YOU UNDERSTAND- THEY BOTH HAVE FIRE I NEED TO SEE THEM FUGHT YALL MY AUTISTIC BRAIN CANT HANDLE THIS BUT I LOVE IT

@nothoughtsonlyleaf AND OTHER MUTUALS!!! WE MUST VOTE THE CHOSEN ONE FROM ANIMATIONS VS ANIMATOR AS ULTIMATE NONBINEY SWAG >:D WHEN THE DAY COMES AND THE FINALS ARE

[rh1nest0neluvvsu]

IVE ARRIVED!! HERE FOR POSITIVITY!! BC U NEED IT!!

u are such an awesome and cool moot bro. like i jumped for joy when u followed me back im shocked we get to be friends (i hope we r friends ts would be SO mebarassing if we arent) keep being super swag

WE ARE FRIENDS 100%! I LOVE YOU YOURE SO COOL AND I WAS SHOCKED WHEN YOU WANTED TO BE MUTUALS WITH ME BECAUSE YOURE LITTERALLY FAMOUS I GET NERVOUS TALKING TO YOU AAAAAAAA!!!!!

[goqmir]

hype level for future mtg releases (this is genuine btw i cant sleep because my leg hurts so bad let me have this)

Murders at Karlov Manor (Q1 2024):

15%. i kinda get the vibes. theres some interesting things generally but im not sure this one is for me. i like clue tokens so im excited for some support in that area but. ill probably pass on buying any of this

Outlaws of Thunder Junction (Q2 2024):

like 35%? its cool! i like the west quite a lot, everyones excited for deadbeat dad oko. im just not expecting a ton and id love to be proven wrong! new planes are always fun and it would be a delight to fall in love with thunder junction but my expectations are very tempered. supposedly its about "villians"-- of which my biggest dream is a reveal of a phyrexian that wasnt killed onscreen to be hanging out there. rakdos would be cool too.

Modern Horizons 3 (Q2 2024)

90%. i cant wait frankly. modern horizons 1 and 2 feature some of my favorite magic cards ever and ive never been around for a modern horizons release so im just so excited. cant wait. big fan i bet there will be so many cool cards dude holy shit

Assassin's Creed (Q3 2024):

5%. i dont give a shit about assassins creed. i like the aesthetics of black flag i guess. this is a set with boosters and the cards will supposedly be modern legal(?) but they arent draftable so thats gonna be a shitshow when the boosters are overpriced and you cant even run limited events with them like MAT but like. at least MAT was awesome and had a bunch of banging cards and introduced cool deciduous mechanics to standard and gave us [[Rocco, Street Chef]]. all this is giving us is ezio or some shit

Bloomburrow (Q3 2024):

75%!! woo!!!!! i cant wait for the little animals set. i like little animals. i would really like one of them to wear a thimble

things i want specifically out of bloomburrow:

give us kwain lore! kwain is such an important little guy to our playgroup we would all love a new kwain or some kwain backstory and there has never been a better time for it

fox tribal 🥺🥺🥺🥺 boros please plzplzplz i need fire foxes i need evil foxes i need foxes so bad i want a fox tribal commander ill do anything

Duskmourn (Q3 2024):

45%. wrenny is hyped for this one but i dont think ill be biting tbh. its cool! i like the vibes :) just not for me is what it seems like right now. maybe like LCI the set design and mechanics will be so sick that its just awesome but the setting isnt catching me

Not gonna talk about innistrad remastered i will not be buying that. give me anime art tamiyo

"Tennis" 2025 (death race across multiple planes with cars):

15%. i like vehicles but like. i feel like this one will kinda skew corny in a way i wont vibe with. the technology seems like kind of a lot too. cool idea, i hope its executed well

"Ultimate" 2025 (Return to Tarkir):

65%! i like tarkir :) they wont print the stupid fetches but whatever. tarkir is super swag and i hope they can resolve the weird multiverse tarkir thing and give us a swag set i believe in them. also ugin reappearance maybe........

Final Fantasy 2025:

100%. i am so onboard with final fantasy dude i feel like it will be so fucking cool compared to like marvel or doctor who or whatever. final fantasy fits so perfectly with the other mtg planes and theres so many interesting things to pull from every game could be its own set so the fact that theres like so much shit there like its so exciting like i cant wait for this one. im gonna play final fantasy 6 with wrenny before it comes out so thats exciting too teehee ^_^

"Volleyball" 2025 (top down space opera set):

95%. a space opera could be so fucking cool. im worried theyll fumble the bag and make it really fucking star warsy and thats a truly terrifying thought but i have faith that we can get so see some more interesting and solemn parts of space in magic the gathering. i think a plane with fledgeling space operations and wild star littered frontiers would be so fucking sick and thats like maybe one of my dream sets. please dont fuck this one up

"Wrestling" 2025 (Lorwyn reimagining)

cool. i like what they did to kamigawa. um idk 30%

"Yachting" 2025 (Arcavios/strixhaven)

yippee!!! 55%? i like strixhaven but showing off more of arcavios is what im really super into here cuz i feel like that could be a lot of fun. its an interesting plane i wanna see more

um anyway ill try to sleep again now i guess

[inightcor]

Each MBTI in a nutshell

ESTP: cool dude, swag

ENTP: charismatic speaker, rational, has good rizz

ENFP: Silly, acts dumb, hyper active crackhead, the friend the talks alot. Energetic, likes to imagine things even when they’re not real. Talks about the craziest shet.

ESFP: life of the party, excited, optimistic, bubbly, center of attention,

ENFJ: litterally the protagonist, main character,

ENTJ: leader

INTP: secretive, recluse, sharp, evil vibes, nocturnal,

INTJ: independent, perfectionist, looks calm

INFJ: romantic deep thinker, overthinks, creative, book worm,

INFP: dreamer, expressive, romanticizes life, peaceful, sweet heart,

ISTJ: follows the rules, realistic & logical person

ISFJ: "parent" of the group

ESTJ: agressive, bossy

ESFJ: grateful, kind, enjoys helping others

ISTP: adventurous, crafter, independent, choose themselves than others, mysterious, cold, insensitive, they don't care for people,

ISFP: hippie (look it up), reserved,

OMG LOL- im sorry for posting so many MBTI stuff, i was soo obessed w them, and I want to finish my research on each type of personality. so I promise this is the last one. okay bye-

[corvidaenightcrawler]

Do you think we will ever see a return of the Hot Daga? I was rewatching the Watcher Guesses Gen Z Slang videos again and was so overjoyed with Shane’s natural storytelling inclination with his "grandma" storyline and now I really miss Hot Daga

I mean there's gonna be Debrief on Ghost Files so... fingers crossed we get a continuation or even a NEW storyline ♡

Im littering your inbox cause idunno who else to talk to about it ?!

P.S. love the Cumbo content too

You know, that's complicated. To me it would depend on why the Hotdaga ended to begin with. Was it a lack of motivation, did he drop it entirely, or was it the fault of the company BuzzFeed? If we figure that it was just lack of motivation or BuzzFeed, he could definitely return to the story! Although, legality with BuzzFeed may be an issue, I'm unsure of how that works. But I really hope we see the Hotdaga return. It's possible

Besides, didn't they say that the debrief would have something else special in it??? That very well could be the Hotdaga but I'm not going to keep my hopes up, you know?

He really is such a natural storyteller! It's his whole thing, it seems to be a passion of his. Also, lots of time travel as a motif and plot, don't you think? It's in Puppet History, too!!

A new storyline would be WILD. Can you IMAGINE. I CAN'T. BECAUSE THAT MAN IS UNPREDICTABLE. The inner machinations of his mind are an enigma. I know it would go hard tho lmao

Oh don't worry about gumming up my inbox, I love getting asks! It's one of my favorite things about Tumblr so dw it's fine <33

Yes..... Clumbo fans have true taste that's literally so swag of you

[atley01]

i really have just only been posting about mr. boo today but that dont mean Im gonna stop, he aint the beloved for no reason he is litterally so great I will turn this acc into a ranboo fan acc at the drop of a hat if need be he is just so swag LMAO /j (but he is gr8 and I wont shut up about him) 

[moonkitty]

i feel like if i had an epic swag bf i would be the easiest fucking person to get flustered or to sweep off my feet like DUDE if you hold my hold i will litterally combust. god im so fucking sorry im daydreaming about intamacy again

[daaziscoolbesties]

i yearn for one(1) thing only, and that is to have a nice, simplistic, cartoonish artstyle. an artstyle that doesnt rely on anatomy, but the "movement" of the drawing, if you get what i mean.

i dont want realistic proportions and traditional colors and basic poses and gradient shading, i want funky lil dudes in funky poses with funky styles littering my sketchbook :( but alas i havent figured out how to develop that kind of style yet, my brain wants anatomy to look nice but also i dont want to draw eyes. i dont want to take time out of my day to learn how to draw lips i want to draw a line that extends past the characters face. i dont want all my characters to have pointy chins with curved cheeks i want their heads to be round and friend-like or full of sharp edges depending on their personalities and styles. i want to give them all not-quite human ears, blob feet, simple faces, but at the same time i want enough detail to convey the story or emotion im trying to tell.

ive spent so much time recently agonizing over how to use 3d model websites, using real-life references and tracing over them for practice, color-picking from real images to try and do realism and failing miserably, but you know whats easier than that? funky little dudes. little dudes who do not care if their legs are too long or their hair is too bouncy. i dont want my characters to look human.

ive spent enough time on the artfight website to realize that most people who classify their characters as "human" have the most basic ass designs (no offense to people who like basic human designs its just not my thing) or its like dnd-medieval style outfits which i cant draw for the life of me (ive tried). again no offense to people who actively enjoy and draw characters like that. i just need my dudes to have that certain,,, off-ness to them. tails are cool. wings are swag (especially if they arent even like,, fully attached,, ), elf ears are so wonderful to me no matter how much theyre overused, horns are so much fun to draw, and colors!! i have no knowledge in the color theory department so this works great for me!! the only thing i really know is dont shade with black, other than that i just colorpick from references usually but i dont want to do that!! i want the colors to hurt people's eyes but in a satisfying way. like the character's design is so nice to look at that you dont mind your eyes hurting a bit. like how im enjoying writing this post even though its 2 am and the brightness on my computer wont go any lower.

and then another thing ive noticed from being on the artfight website is that a lot of people classify their characters that are anthro/have anthro features under humanoids/monsters. like i made a google form to find some people to attack and someone sent me in a character with some sort of animal (wolf? idk) arms and legs. like dude!! peak character design i love her. but me personally? i cant draw that shit, its so hard for me. i tried a while back and its just Not my thing. nothing against furries i just. cant. and i dont want to either.

and i got another submission that i accidentally deleted that was like full anthro/wolf-like like my comrade,,, i cannot draw animals what makes you think i can draw an animal who acts like a human lmao. i can do like. very basic tails, and also animal ears but i cant do the arms and legs and such i just dont know the anatomy, and i know i was talking about how i dont want to care about anatomy but i feel like for anthros you really do need to know at least basic animal anatomy so you know how the limbs look and shit and i dont have that knowledge and dont feel like gaining it.

and then there were some submissions that i absolutely adored. there was one that like, was vaguely human shaped but definitely was not a human. they had a dark-ish lavender colored skin and horns and tusks and like goat ears and a sorta fluffy tail with spikes on it and they had wings and such and they were such a pleasure to draw i love them. and they had a fairly simple outfit too, nothing too complicated. and then i also enjoy object head characters, theyre so neato to me. i got one of those and i really wish i had the motivation to work on it cause it looks so fun.

i want to make funky characters but id have nothing to do with them because the only book i ever tried writing (key word tried - never got past planning it out) had strictly human characters in it, and most of the books i read are humans/humans with powers in situations specific to them so id have no idea what lore to make with the dudes. assuming i have the motivation to make lore and backstory because honestly i just really enjoy character designing its super duper fun.

(side note a song about trucks doing the deed came on just now and its interrupted my flow, apologies).

i only have three actual characters right now. one is an original roleplay oc whos design is literally athletic shorts, an oversized long sleeved grey sweatshirt, long purple hair, and demon horns. the second one is my persona whos design some sorta medival knight outfit kinda thing? but not ugly it looks really cool (idk one of my friends designed it bc i won some contest from him but the drawing was on a super small scale so idrk the details,,,) with a plague doctor mask and crown, and shoulder length wavy brown hair, dyed bright pink at the end. and then my last one im not too comfortable using other places because theyre a character my friend is using in the story hes writing, and thats really the only place theyve been used. but theyre easily my favorite and im already writing a ton so ill talk about them too.

they're a sorta elf species thing from another planet, with pale green skin and pointed ears. they also have a tail, its like,, super thin, but with a feathery bit at the end. probably not the texture of a feather but i dont know how else to describe it. they have short, curly, almost-draco-malfoy-blonde hair that when it gets too long they can put in a man bun. their eyesight is kinda shitty so when they got to earth, they were exploring some supply closets around the airship. drop off area. thing. like airport but for rocketships and also fancier. yeah. they were exploring that area and found a nice big pair of round glasses with grey frames. and they also found a cowboy-style hat and a sharpie so they wrote their name on the underside of the brim of the hat and stole the hat and glasses (but left the sharpie in the supply closet).

yeah theyre my favorite, my absolute beloved, my child, so cool. i want more characters like them but with maybe a bit more snazzier designs. theyre super cool and all but they could have more pizzazz if they werent in a story where its too late to give them more pizzazz. i just want to be able to give my characters thigh-high boots with a bunch of buckles and fluffy hair with tons of accessories crammed in and abnormally large and long ears that can harbor many piercings and horns that can hold rings on them and special little details on their outfits like who knows what but i dont have any characters to do that too, so i have to make them from scratch, which is always hard especially when you have artblock.

and i also have like 17 characters i need to fully draw, line, and maybe color for artfight before august 1st. so i dont know. i have many things to do and plenty of time to do it but instead i spend my time halfway watching repetitive youtube videos that get boring or sleeping all damn day because i stay up too late doing things like this or i just do nothing at all and its tiring and frustrating but i also feel nothing about it like theres no consequence if i dont do it besides you know. not doing it, not gaining that experience, not making something i enjoy.

so i should do it but i dont for whatever reason, i think its called executive dysfunction but im not sure. this post started out very differently than it ended and i said somewhere up there that i was writing this at 2 am but now its almost 3. this is so many words why couldnt i have put this energy into something productive

[1-800-seo]

1-800-𝗦𝗘𝖮'𝘀 𖣘 "𝗬𝗼𝘂'𝗿𝗲 𝗺𝘆 (𝗨𝗻𝗶)𝘃𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗲"

- 𝗽𝗮𝗶𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗴: 𝖩𝗎𝗇𝗀𝗄𝗈𝗈𝗄 𝗑 𝖸/𝖭

- 𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗿𝗲: 𝖿𝗅𝗎𝖿𝖿/𝗌𝗅𝗂𝗀𝗁𝗍 𝖼𝗋𝖺𝖼𝗄/𝖻𝗎𝗅𝗅𝖾𝗍𝖾𝖽/𝖾2𝗅/𝖼𝗈𝗅𝗅𝖾𝗀𝖾 𝖠𝖴

- 𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: 𝗄𝗂𝗌𝗌𝗂𝗇𝗀 (𝖺 𝖼𝗈𝗎𝗉𝗅𝖾 𝗈𝖿 𝗄𝗂𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗌), 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋 𝗁𝖺𝗍𝖾𝗌 𝗅𝖺𝗎𝗇𝖽𝗋𝗒, 𝖽𝗈𝗆!𝗃𝗄 𝗂𝖿 𝗎 𝗌𝗊𝗎𝗂𝗇𝗍, 𝖾𝗇𝖾𝗆𝗂𝖾𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝗅𝗈𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗌

- 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱𝘀: 2984

- 𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆: 𝖶𝗁𝖾𝗇 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗅𝖺𝗎𝗇𝖽𝗋𝗒 𝗀𝖾𝗍𝗌 𝗆𝗂���𝖾𝖽 𝗎𝗉 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝖺 𝖼𝖾𝗋𝗍𝖺𝗂𝗇 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾𝗈𝗇𝖾'𝗌 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖺𝗅𝗅 𝗈𝖿 𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗐𝗁𝗂𝗍𝖾'𝗌 𝗀𝗈 𝗉𝗂𝗇𝗄, 𝖺 𝗀𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗍 𝗋𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗇𝗀𝖾 𝗉𝗅𝗈𝗍 𝖾𝗇𝗌𝗎𝖾𝗌, 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝖿𝗂𝗇𝖽 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋𝗌𝖾𝗅𝖿 𝖾𝗇𝖺𝗆𝗈𝗎𝗋𝖾𝖽 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖺𝗇𝗇𝗈𝗒𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝖽𝗈𝗋𝗄.

doing laundry is absolutely one of your least favourite things in the world beside soggy socks

so you’re in a bad mood as soon as you walk into the campus launderette to say the least

the launderette is empty bar one dude you’d seen around the global technics centre

if you remember rightly he’s a European studies major

odd choice but you do you and all that

now you’re not weird or anything but you have a preference on what type of washing machine you use

I know I know kind of unorthodox

but the old washing machines take 30 mins longer so you’d prefer a newer one

unfortunately the only one left is directly next to this familiar-faced stranger and his laundry

your better judgement is telling you no but your impatience is telling you yes

and so you dump your laundry onto the floor next to the stranger and his and start sorting through for all your whites

your piles mingle a tad as they overlap beside each other like Venn diagrams of assorted underwear and other garments

his consisting of only whites

yours a jumbled mess since you had to wash all of your stuff

in sync you both pick up your washing and put it into the machine

you catch his dark wide eyes as you both straighten up and he lets out an awkward low-voiced giggle

your cheeks immediately flush pink and a bashful smile creeps up to your lips

“you’re from the global centre, right?”

you ask testing the waters

“I am, I’m a European studies major, my name’s Jungkook. I recognise you, you’re in linguistics class right?”

“Yeah, I’m a linguistics major so you’ll mostly see me there, it’s nice to meet you Jungkook”

you say with a smile as your hands fidget with the door handle of the washing machine

“It’s nice to meet you too, I thought I recognised you from somewhere, but it’s because I see you sometimes when I have to do extra credit European language projects. What’s your name?”

he says tilting his head like a curious puppy

“its ______”

you say as you bow to him politely

“Can I ask you something? I have to do a project on European languages and their similarities to others. The professor wants us to speak to outsiders for references so would I be able to collab on a project with you sometime in the future, if it’s not too much to ask?”

he averts his eyes from yours and blushes lightly

“Oh yeah sure, that’s no issue! It’ll be beneficial to me too because the linguistics portion of the course is coming up soon, so it’s a great idea.”

you beam at him

“Could I get your number?”

their is a pause that feels like an eternity between your next words and his last

the cause of this is your mind being far too focused on his wavy dark hair and his clear doe eyes

you snap out of your daze

“yeah totally, one sec”

you pull out your phone from your backpack on top of the washing machine and input his contact name and number as he reads it out

“Thanks for that, it’ll be a big help, let me know when you want to link up” he replies

and with that you had his number and continued on with your washing

21/10 18:32

Jungkook ༄ : not to be accusatory but do you happen to own a pair of RED socks?

You: yes, why do you ask??

Jungkook ༄ : well ALL of my washing seems to be PINK!!

You: just because I own a pair of red socks doesn’t mean it was me 😠

Jungkook ༄ : yes but you were the only one in the launderette when I was there,,

Jungkook ༄ : smh gonna be turning up to class in pink tshirts and and socks, everyone be thinking ive made a new fashion choices when it’s really just because SOMEONE can’t keep their clothes separate from others B/

You: 1) it’s not my fault that my socks decided to migrate to new lands

You: 2) why, are you scared of pink or something? your ego too fragile to wear a ‘woman’s colour’?

You: 3) did you really use a sunglasses sad face emoticon lol

Jungkook ༄ : girl u owe me big time for all these clothes you ruined 😩

Jungkook ༄ : also im not scared of pink I just dont want to be wearing pink shirts to all of my formal events for the next ten years

Jungkook ༄ : and yes im sWaG so my emoticons are sWaG duh

You : ruined? ruINED? RUINED? I did not ruin anything, I simply spiced up your wardrobe boo x

You : oh no he’s a 2012 hype beast 🤦🏻‍♀️

Jungkook ༄ : how dare you call me something so sacreligious as a hypebeast!!

Jungkook ༄ : I am gucci not channel thank you very much

Jungkook ༄ : anyways I gtg write a report, speak soon red socks

Seen ✓

Jungkook was in fact not writing a report

he was planning revenge dun dun dun~~~

his plan was to do the exact same thing you had done to him

but he had to be cunning about it

and so the week went on

he was scrolling through twt when he received a new follower

it was the one and only @_______

and lo and behold their last tweet was “tysm Seokjin oppa for buying me a personal washing machine,, now I can do my most hated thing but at home!!”

hehehe

an idea sprung into kookie’s head

he didn’t have to try and spike your washing at the launderette

he could do it in a place you’d never suspect,, your home

now he only had to find out where you lived

just stalkerish tingz

he had to be lowkey about this

so he decided to ask his best mate and social butterfly of a friend Taehyung whether he knew you

and of course he did lol

“Hell yeah I know where she lives, she had the best party of the whole term, Jimin was so drunk he started chatting himself up in the mirror”

“Damn that sounds like a good time, probs should start going to these parties you invite me to”

“defo should, anyways I’ll tell u as long as you promise not to spread the information or use it for pervy or questionable reasons”

“I promise not to spread it or use it for pervy or questionable reasons”

he replies in monotone voice and his hand on his chest like an oath

and so that was how he acquired your address

simple enough really

and so that’s the events that lead him to be crawling through your dorm window however paused like a deer in headlights at the questionable sounds coming from the room across

he was squatted on the window ledge like spider man, red sock in hand and hood up

it was 9:00pm and your university apartment was supposed to be empty at this time

you had your class on now but he hadn’t accounted for your roommate

hence why he had frozen at the unsavoury sounds echoing round the apartment

low moans and grunts emanated from the room across

dEsGöStEn

he had to get to the kitchen without alerting the dusk time love makers

he could do it if the floor plan was the same as his apartment block and he bet his reputation on that

if he got caught he’d never hear the end of it from his mates and your roommate might even call the campus police if they were spooked enough

and so he clambered through your bedroom window and onto your bed underneath

unmade bed might he add but what did he expect from a uni student

with wide eyes he listened for any noise of suspecting roommates and examined your room

the desk was littered with papers and an oversized lava lamp stood stout in the corner of the room

a lacy bra was hung over your wardrobe handle

he shoved away the idea of you wearing it and continued with his night time plot

slowly and stealthily he crept through the halls of the apartment and out to the kitchen

on the maiden was already a neatly hung load of whites

he’d have to assume it was yours otherwise he’d have to go back to your room to get laundry

he bundled up the clothes and shoved them in the washing machine with the incriminating red sock he’d brought and set it to economy spin

round and round it spun, getting progressively louder as it went

he had to get out of there asap

tip-toeing as he went past the questionable lewd noises, he finally made it to your bedroom

he made one last check to see if he’d left any damage in your room

his eyes fell upon that same bra

damn his manhood making him think predictably

he shoved the thought away and departed

25/10 22:08

You: what in the hell did you do to my washing!!!?!!!

You: unless it was a ghost it HAD TO BE YOU JEON 🤬

Jungkook ༄ : wym I don’t even know where you live 😑

Jungkook ༄ : what’ve you done now?

You: IT HAS TO BE YOU!! SOMEONE FRIGGIN TURNED MY WASHING PINK AND I PROMISE YOU IT WASNT ME

Jungkook ༄ : how would i do that?? I don’t have like magic clothes dyeing skills boo

You: I SWEAR it was you!!

You: what do you want to bet it was u

Jungkook ༄ : I won’t bet anything I’m poor

You: that means you did it!

Jungkook ༄ : if you come with me to Taehyung’s party tomorrow I’ll tell u everything

Jungkook ༄ : but only if you go, that’s the terms of agreement

You: that’s all the incriminating evidence I need!! you basically just admitted to it you know?

You: however for reasons sake I will attend 👀

Jungkook ༄ : see you then red socks x

You: I suppose u will x

time passed quickly and soon it was Taehyung’s party

You’d known Taehyung since middle school however since starting college you hadn’t seen much of him

schedules clashed often so the only time you got to see him was at a good party

nothing wrong with that, you just probably haven’t had a completely sober conversation with him in 2 years

he’s good fun, Taehyung, so you hoped Jungkook wasn’t as much as a killjoy as he’d been this week

his little antics (that you’d yet to figure out) had caused your work uniform to turn bright pink

and thus the ‘pink princess’ nickname at work began

you felt like sharpay, everyone in white, but you pink

you’d quite like to knock Jungkook down a peg after that

and so you made your way to the infamous Taehyung’s party

he welcomed you as you entered the large door of his fraternity house

behind his head of black curls you could see the mess that is a raging college party

young people, at assumably different levels of intoxication, were everywhere

some were stood all the way up the expanse of the stairs even

you looked around and spotted a familiar brunette in the kitchen sat on the large marble counter tops

he’s chatting to some pink haired girl beside him

you stalk up to him like a woman on a mission and jokingly (a little too hard for jokingly) push his shoulders with both hands

he immediately snaps his head round to face you and his eyes widen with shock

“I have a bone to pick with you.” you say as stern as you can

you grab hold a fistful of his black T-shirt and drag him into a side room

once you enter only then do you realise it’s a laundry room

how fitting 👀

you say “Come on, tell me how you did it.” as you cross your arms and glare at him

“Did what?”

“you know what I mean, don’t play dumb with me, how did you turn all of my washing pink, and might I add, my work uniform too!”

“Ohhh that, it was far too easy. You really should keep your windows locked when you’re out.” he says as he laughs, like the whole thing is amusing

“So you’re telling me you broke into my apartment?! How did u know where I live??”

at this point you’re pacing around the room, arms flailing wide at the sudden discovery

“Well, I may or may not have asked Taehyung, and he told me, and then I entered, I did not break into your apartment. Anyway, I didn’t touch anything but the washing machine and I had the lovely experience of being serenaded by your roommate’s sex symphony.”

he made a step forward towards you, almost in a challenging way

“Oh I’ll be having harsh words with him later...” you say as you uncross your arms and put them on your hips.

you stand thinking for a second before it sinks in

“Wait.. what did you hear? You said sex symphony, right?”

“Uh yeah, your roommate was proper going at it with someone. At least he had the decency to do it whilst you were out, I guess.” He chuckled

“Oh my days, that means Hobi must’ve had Hyerim round! Go him I guess, but also ewww”

“Anyways we’ve bounced around the issue enough here, you ruined my clothes and broke into my apartment!” you exclaim backing up against the wall

Jungkook starts to close the gap between you two

“So? What’re you going to do about?”

your back pressed flush with the wall, you start to realise how close he really is

you can see the small freckles that dot the bridge of his nose, the thick eyelashes that frame his eyelids, the totally sinful look in his eyes

like this you start to realise how shockingly handsome he is

no wonder he has a slight reputation in class

you had no idea why he was looking at you this way

“I-I’ll call campus security..” You begin

“Will you really now?” he retorts as he slams his hand into the wall behind you, caging you in

“I w-will” a whisper that falls on deaf ears

before you even register, his lips have attached themselves to yours and you feel his thumb under your jaw

he works his lips against yours and you feel your legs start to tremble

he tastes sweet and robust, like syrup on your tastebuds

you mould into his kiss and then break away, panting for air, wanting more

everything felt so wrong, yet so right at the same time

it was as if your current issue had melted away and the only thing you could focus on was the way he looked at you and how his soft lips felt against yours

“J-Jungkook? What’re we doing?” you asked, a giggle leaving you

you rest your head against chest, clasping at his tshirt

“I couldn’t resist, you’re so hot when you’re angry”

he places a firm kiss against your cheek, takes your hand in his, and leads you back to the party

you couldn’t believe you’d just done that, let him kiss you so easily

but once you let him, it felt so right, like it was supposed to be that way, him lapping you up like a parched man to water

it felt so natural to have his arm round your waist like it was now

the pair of you approached Taehyung, still clutched together

“What happened to you two? I heard _____ went off on one and then you both were missing for ages. And now you both show up all over each other... what went down 👀”

“Well you know, hate and love are both forms of passion.” Jungkook says with a smirk

“excuse me? Assuming I love you? I let you kiss me once and you say it’s love? I’ll show you love” you retort

“Oooh she’s feisty; so you kissed? Damn, things’re moving quickly for you two, one minute Jungkook’s asking me for your address, the next you’re sucking each other’s faces off. I’m one of hell of a wing man, if I do say so myself.”

Taehyung flips an imaginary lock of hair out of his way like a sassy high school cheerleader

You both just laugh, at Taehyung, and because of how crazy it is,

It’s almost like you didn’t know you liked him like that until it smacked you in the face

“Do you want a drink? A beer?” Jungkook asks pouring himself a glass of punch

“That’d be great, thank you” you reply as you realise how much more time you want to spend with this annoying but totally handsome dork of a boy

༄ 𝖳𝗁𝖺𝗇𝗄 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗌𝗈 𝗆𝗎𝖼𝗁 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝗂𝗇𝗀! ༄

This was just a little fic I wrote a while ago which had formatting errors so I fixed it for y’alI, Hope you enjoyed it ☺️ Let me know what you thought of it and feel free to like and reblog <3

[all-hail-the-witcher]

I have spent far too much time on ao3 recently and have decided to make a list of the weirdest/best tags and finally decided to post it as a final fuck you to this entire decade, please enjoy

- “penis swag”

- “smut with feelings”

- “I swear to god this is not crack”

- “Jarvis is a dapper house elf”

- “probable misuse of federal accountancy”

- “cuddle spores”

- “blatant disrespect of a mans motorcycle”

- “unnecessary comparisons to animal planet during sexy times”

- “abusing the tagging system?”

- “no zombies were created in the harming of this story”

- “clintucky fried chicken”

- “the tags make this look way weirder than it is to be honest”

- “this is capital S Soft”

- “I dont know what straight means”

- “flowers have MEANINGS people, LEARN THEM”

- “apologies to actual Canadians, I know youre pros at invading the united states”

- “The midwest is kinda weird”

- “I spilled the sad in my porn”

- “sharing toothbrushes is weird and im not sorry to tell you that”

- “nothing serious here”

- “I could be working on one of my 50+ wips, but no here I am writing some bullshit”

- “I should go back to writing instead of adding tags”

- “im not spell checking this crap”

- “I hope none of my future psychiatrists see this, nor any of my future employers”

- “hello future historians this is what happens in the head of someone with adhd”

- “I mean theres a coffee related plot which lasts about 500 words”

- “wizards are assholes”

- “I wrote the tags before the fic and now I realize the stoy didnt went the way i wanted it to”

- “the fanfic equivalent of Well That Escalated Quickly”

- “emotionally unavailable acrophiliac murder machines”

- “omg thats a real tag”

- “really terrible twilight puns that im not even remotely sorry about”

- “I dont do human science so im allowed to make some shit up”

- “everyone should just hug man”

- “non-consensual masturbation of humans by dolphins is a real thing, my tour guide said so”

- “canon compliant to literally nothing”

- “assholes in love”

- “id like to apologize to the entire greek pantheon, except zeus cause fuck that guy”

- “trigger warning: Africa by toto”

- “st. petersburg is in Florida not russia”

- “the cheesiest flirting you'll ever read”

- “appreciate my puns”

- “its not a coffee shop au if most of it takes place in Tony Starks kitchen”

- “actually theyre kinda married”

- “mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm”

- “im just letting this story take me wherever it wants to go”

-  “superhero frathouse skyscraper”

- “no tentacle sex”

- “but no dogs kissing”

- “look- lady and the tramp gives meezers a bad rap okay?”

- “inadvisable medical practices”

- “dont try this at home kids”

- “saps in love”

- “accidentally living together”

- “just bros being bros”

- “bromance to romance”

- “all of the pop culture references”

- “mature tag for eventual violence, and also profanity because we’re all adults here for the most part”

- “getting banned from walmart”

- “the kicked out of Walmart list”

- “bribery through coffee and pizza”

- “no baloney sandwiches were harmed during the making of this fic”

- “SPAAAAACE”

- “no idea how long this will be - but it will probably be a stupid long thing”

- “space opera”

- “slow burn but it forgot to be slow”

- “seriously people, helmets are important”

- “inadvisable road safety practices”

- “accidental baby acquisition”

- “I summarize six months in a paragraph, for plot reasons”

- “monstrous abuses against perfectly good bedframes”

- “super smash bros, bucky needs to thank that game for his relationship, pikachu helped him realize that hes gay”

- “some sketchy ass explanation because reasons”

- “sex will be had while wearing olympic medals”

- “i have been informed by many parties that this is ‘very fluffy’”

- “murder strut”

- “fuck you flowers, not that kind of fuck”

- “actual trash”

- “literal litter”

- “compost couple”

[demoninc]

HI CAN YOY TWLL ME ABOUT YOUR KITTY⁉️

i have multiple... 😁the oldest her name is kiki shes so silly n she loves wet food so much she goes insane for it. her older kittens are vincent, tink, possumface, n NERO!! nero is soooo super silly but a little strange too... shes the black kitty i posted a pic of bc shes a little insane. and all of kikis kittens love spending time in my room [IM THEIR FAVORITE!!!] and i pet their kittyness so much theyre so silly and SWAG!!! vincent only recently came back to live with us bc she used to live w a relative but he cldnt care for her or smth so i get to take care of her 💘shes so soft btw. theres another kitty arnd their age but not related to them his name is mowmow n we quite literally found him in a cardboard box all alone. n kiki had another litter that we're slowly giving away to new homes only one had a name rly but it never stuck. all of those kittens except for 2 looked the exact same. theyre almost all white with dark gray/black splotches and 1 of the kitties has a black spot on its muzzle unlike the others and another was dark gray all over. all of my kitties are so silly and love to play and take naps 😁ok thats it hit post

[legobatjoker]

waa kay im going 2 bed niw mx i have school tmrw omg !!! j a reminder b4 i do tho that i rly do love you so so much my dearest, ik i say stuff like this a lot but i hope u know i always mean it so so much my dearest you are such a wonderful incredible person and im so so incredble glad 2 have u in my life i love talking 2 u sm nd spending time with u j hearing ur thoughts on things nd j having u in my life knowing ur here 4 me nd u always being so caring nd supporting nd j having my back always means so so much nd i hope you know im always here 4 u too whenever u need me in anyway i can b bd that i wanna be as good 2 u as u are 2 me bc u deserve it so so much and just you are so so amazing and make me feel so so happy and loved and warm and i j love you so so much luce so so much :’> i hopw ur days been ok nd work wasnt too tiring nd that u sleep so well my dearest, night night ouioui 💖🐈🧡🌹🐌🍓🍊❣️🌻💖✨ /p

LITTERALLY HAVE SUCH A GOOD NIGHT AND GOOD RESTi hope u wake up well rested for school and pls lmk how it is 🐟🌼🌼!!! <-those emojis were a mistake but imkeeping them.. UR SO SWAG ANDD thank YOU sm for always been here for me and supporting me it means smm and im so lucky to b friends w u :]!!!! ur rlly very veryeyye very so very lovely and incredibl and i love you so so much!! gnight ouioui!!!! 💕💕💕💕💕