#im like confident in my work but also not does this make sense
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i read your horcrux post, its fascinating and very well done! im just stuck on one thing: while i agree that tom definitely has a good share of self-hatred, enough to cause himself pain and endure an agonising process to become immortal, doesnt the whole idea of "killing yourself" for the ritual seem very risky? like what if you actually die lmao then the whole thing was all for naught. i mean i can also see him being confident and arrogant enough to believe he COULD do it without mistakes, but still. seems like a big risk considering his whole shtick is avoiding death as far as possible. anyway thank you for all your metas they are very enjoyable to read and think about!!!
Thank you so much! 💕 I'm glad you liked my Horcrux theory, it's one of the earliest ones I made here and I'm still pretty proud of it.
As for the risk — yeah, it is incredibly risky, that's kind of the point. This is a ritual we know Tom was crazy to attempt multiple times, a ritual in-universe that even just doing it once is considered insanely risky and potentially damaging, not to mention multiple times:
‘Of the Horcrux, wickedest of magical inventions, we shall not speak nor give direction. ...’I mean, why mention it then?” she said impatiently, slamming the old book shut;
(HBP)
That was what you told me he said. ‘Further than anybody,’ And I thought I knew what that meant, though the Death Eaters did not. He was referring to his Horcruxes, Horcruxes in the plural, Harry, which I do not believe any other wizard has ever had.
(HBP) - only part of the quote since the rest of Dumbles' analysis of Voldemort's character in the above section is questionable.
JKR stated in an interview there is a final horrible step that must be taken to make a Horcrux, something beyond just murder. Cannibalism, physical self-mutilation, or masturbating over the corpse (Yes, I have read this theory somewhere) don't make sense because then Harry couldn't become a Horcrux. It doesn't really leave us with many possibilities.
Additionally, Voldemort talks of how only he was skilled and brave enough to attempt it more than once, to go "further than anyone" ever had:
I, who have gone further than anybody along the path that leads to immortality. You know my goal — to conquer death. And now, I was tested, and it appeared that one or more of my experiments had worked . . . for I had not been killed, though the curse should have done it.
(GoF)
If there was no risk, more people would make Horcruxes and more people would make multiple Horcruxes. Voldemort himself calls it an "experiment". He wasn't sure it would work at any point but the risk was worth it for him.
when he asks Slughorn what would happen if you made multiple Horcruxes he already made two Horcruxes. He experimented with Horcrux when he had little to no information on them. He experimented magically on himself. Multiple times. (He also mentioned "experiments" in plural so I wonder if he had another method besides Horcruxes that he attempted...). This is not a person who cares about "risk" like a normal person. Riping your soul apart to make a Horcrux, even without my theory, is in itself, a huge risk — and he does so consciously 6 times!
Dumbledore, Slughorn, and Voldemort all talk of Horcruxes like an unknown magic, barely attempted by anyone throughout history. Even Magick Moste Evile doesn't give more than a mention to the concept of Horcruxes because no one actually makes them. (It's the spider georg meme: "average dark wizard makes 1 horcrux in their lifetime factoid actualy just statistical error. average dark wizard makes 0 horcruxes. Horcrux Tom, who lives as a wraith in albenia & made 7 horcruxes, is an outlier adn should not have been counted").
If you need to temporarily kill yourself to become immortal it would explain why not more people have tried it. I mean, Grindelwald wanted to be the Master of Death, so why not make a Horcrux, I'm sure he was familiar with the ritual?
Becouse the risk was too great for him to take.
I talked about this a bit here and @iamnmbr3 has this post about this, but Tom, for all that he is the heir of Slytherin, acts a lot like a Gryffindor. He is prideful, sure, but he is so incredibly brave. Experimenting on himself with a super dangerous ritual 7 times is incredibly in character for him. Yes, he's arrogant, he's sure he'd succeed, but unlike Grindelwald or (younger) Dumbledore, he is willing to take the ultimate risk for the sake of his immortality.
It also makes sense symbolically. Like, to become immortal you have to risk your life — to live forever you must be ready to go through death. It makes sense in a symbolic sort of way. It just feels right.
#harry potter#hp#hp meta#asks#anonymous#hollowedtheory#hp magical theory#wizarding world#horcruxes#horcrux#tom riddle#tom marvolo riddle#lord voldemort#voldemort
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hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh tomorrow………….. bee eff ay portfolio review……………………….
#turt talks#this isnt abt any of my blogs im just having those fuckin. 9pm+ thoughts#dying on yhe floor rn#im like confident in my work but also not does this make sense#like hell yea i have good shit here. but also The Horrors (self-doubt)#(i am aware of the self-doubt and understand that i must persevere despite it)#the worst part is that i cant really project this onto any of my characters bc none of them would realy be experiencing this :(#and tbh i think im too exhausted to even try projectng this shit rn#anywyas. ill be prolly pretty much dead from the internet tmrw <3 we���ll see how this weekend goes
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hi this is a post saying i will not b online((or try)) until i get my g.e.d.
i love u all if i uh, yk never return
hugs hugs many sweet dreams & good mornings!
#i had a much longer post then realized no1 wants 2 read all that long#i dont want 2 like fill the tags w/reasons y im suddenly doing this#hell i might regret this & delete it a minute l8r#but like. i need my highschool diploma#ive failed school like all the way through. my entire school career looks good in concept but its not#shit im going 2 start crying again#<- that is also y#i keep crying i keep like getting rlly sad & self#destructive & idk how 2 fix that so im doing this so no1 hears my whining#uhhh pray 4 me 2 pass ig lol#hugs hugs hugs mnay hugs#this feels like a final goodbye bc my self confidence is so bad jdjfiosk#summer school; switching classes bc of bad grades; getting expelled; having numerous teacher conferences; having my teachers talk 2 me like#im their kid just bc my mother works @ the school ohh my god that hurt the most & made me want 2 go monkey mode#point is im not good @ school & never have been & it stresses me out & im so scared#im so afaid im crying just thinking about sitting in a class#i love learning i love ideas i love questions MY FAVORITE SUBJECT IS MATH but im just so scared 4 some reason#& idk if ill b able 2 do it#i can barely see my screen help djchis#anyways im going 2 try my best bc i want 2 talk 2 my friends & uhm thats rlly it#but i cant do that unless i get better so im going 2 try 2 not#i ended up rambling in the tags blehhh#niko is also w/me rn as always & i will give him all the kisses &love i can so nobody worry about that#watch me take this post back in a day bc the internet has been 1 of my only safe soaces#this is so pathetic kanfkf & me saying so does not make it any less so#i just jumped out of the car & walked 2 hrs home crying bc im an actual disaster rn#like what if everything im thinking rn makes no sense#i mean not the school thing#i need 2 do that#i need 2 stop stalling
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THEYRE FINALLY GIVING ME REAL PAINKILLERS.... GOD BLESS
#doc says its almost definitely fibro which is such a . relief i guess.#i was KINDA hoping itd be autoimmune bc my other doc says i cant make a case for disability w fibro#rhuem doc tho said abt the same but also she said she would refer me to a social worker#just to see if theres Anything that can be done for me#that said if these meds genuinely clear my pain. it will open a lot of doors for me in the sense of work ^^#i was put on cymbalta before and it. Helped. but i was so dizzy literally all of the time#i was constantly falling over....#shes putting me on neurontin and buspar btw#i think those are what mom is on also#so like. genetically speaking theyre prob a good match for me#anyway im so glad to officially consider myself part of the fibro community ive suspected for a while#and ultimately i was still onviously chronically ill and disabled so i was already part of those communities#but it does feel good to be able to confidently say. yep im fibro gang#also doc was complaining abt lack of treatment options for pain esp nerve pain#and she also mentioned that theres a new treatment currently being studied that she thinks will be good#but hasnt had enough studies done for it to be a prescription yet.... 👀
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"Mad Woman"
ok yall im out of school now! this was rushed so don't judge, when i write i just pour out whatever's in my head, that's why it's almost always rushed. i feel like if i don't write it, it'll disappeare! also to everyone hating in my asks, NO ONE IS FORCING YOU TO READ MY WORK!!!! hating does nothing but discourage me and lower my already non-existent confidence in my writing. pls leave me alone, if you don't have anything nice to say; don't say anything. i LOVE all my positive asks and comments, they make my day. don't ruin it for me.
Prologue: hapter 1: Chapter 2: Chapter 3: Chapter 4: Chapter 5 Chapter 6:
Six months, that's how long it's been since Bruce exiled you to New York and left you alone once again. It's been 387 days since Tiffany Maverick pulled the rug from beneath your feet and ensnared your family in her web of lies and manipulation. For six months, your family ignored you, only Alfred sending you the occasional care package which you promptly threw in the garbage.
You wish Tiffany and Damian were as content with ignoring you as the rest of the family but unfortunately, they went out of their way to rub their closeness in your face by sending you pictures of family movie night, family game night, and the family attending their school events. It made you angry at first, before you saw how funny it was. A family of billionaires, a family of detectives, a family of vigilantes, sitting next to a spy; obliviously feeding her insider information. The Batman, sitting grinning ear to ear next to a girl who could be his downfall.
Surprisingly, boarding school was amazing. The boys were hot, though most arrogant and dumb, they were all loaded and into you. The girls idolized you from the moment you walked in, your word was law around here and the power felt amazing. You decided what was in and out, who was hot and who was not; a huge difference and change of pace from the years of bullying and ridicule at Gotham Prep.
The charm came with your new abilities, most likely. Sure, the first two months were fucking painful and exposed you to pain you didn't think was possible but it was a small price to pay. It was nothing for the power of being able to charm and flirt your way out of just about anything, being able to eject venom with the slightest trace of your fresh set of acrylics, being able to literally bite people with your fangs and have them enjoy it, sensing heat signatures and feeling emotions and eyes on you, having the ability to give literal bone-crushing hugs, and so many things you haven't even discovered.
Not to mention your random overnight makeover! Suddenly, your figure was to die for, perfect in all senses of the word. Your skin gleamed and shimmered in the light, long shed away were all the blemishes and scars. Your hair always shiny and your teeth always pearly white, albeit a bit sharp. You're the image of beauty.
Who cares about the price when the product was this good anyway?
Who needed familial love when everyone here worshipped you? That new view and utter hatred for the family is what convinced you to accept Ariele, your boarding school bff and roomie,'s offer to spend summer break with her family in the south of france. Of course, you wanted to go back to manor for a week before meeting her there. Alfred asked you to come and though you were angry at him, you missed the old man. You swore to yourself that you'd only stay the night, catch up with Alfred, and ignore your 'family' then promptly spend the summer half naked, tanning on a super yacht with your girls.
Little did you know that you'd never make it to france, in fact, you wouldn't even make it out the manor now that Tim discovered the truth and told the rest of the family.
Tim Drake noticed things. Small things. Minute details that other people might overlook. That's how he found the truth.
It started with the cooking. Tiffany had casually mentioned one evening that she’d found some old recipes in the manor’s archives, recipes that you had once written down, hoping to impress Damian with Arabic dinners and desserts. Tiffany had barely glanced at the handwritten notes before she had offered to make dinner that night—a perfect replica of your signature stuffed cabbage leaves, Malfoof, as you called it.
Tim had been there when it happened. He’d recognized it immediately. The dish was one of your favorites, one you had made for family dinners. It was too familiar, too precise for Tiffany, it lacked the usual love and effort.
Then came the awards. It was subtle at first, too. Tiffany casually dropping that she had “entered a local baking competition” and how much fun it had been to win. Tim had known that you had been the one to actually win that competition the year before, he remembered rolling his eyes as you foolishly tried to impress him. But when he checked the award Tiffany had won? It looked eerily similar to the one that you had earned. Tiffany didn’t even bother hiding her gloating as she showed it off, calling it “another step toward making Gotham proud.”
Tim’s stomach churned. It wasn’t a coincidence. Tiffany was stealing your life and he was the only one that saw it. Who knows what else she was stealing.
The pieces clicked into place when he found the old photo albums. Tiffany had been snooping around the library one afternoon, pulling out albums that had been tucked away in the back, ones that hadn’t been touched in years. They were full of memories of your achievements, pictures of family vacations, awards won for charity work and academic excellence. Baby photo's, old camera's, journals, even old clothes.It wasn’t just admiration. It was an obsession.
He saw her dig through and read every one of your old entries, saw her stare at pictures and attempt to manuever her body how you stood, but what really creeped him out was when she started tracing over your handwriting.
Tim couldn’t let it go. This was insane. It was almost as if Tiffany wanted to wear your skin.
It wasn’t that he wanted to make Tiffany an enemy or villainize her, quite the opposite actually, he'd been ignoring her strange behavior and smell for a year now because of how fond he was of her. But this? This was crossing a line. She wasn’t just trying to fit in anymore, this was dangerous.
He now suspected there was more to Tiffany than just her obsession with your life and after putting the pieces together, it was becoming clear: Tiffany was playing a much deeper game. She wasn’t just trying to steal your identity, she was stealing information, too.
Tim’s investigative skills had been honed through years of being the tech guy of the Batfamily, and when something felt off, he didn’t ignore it. Not anymore, he started tracking small anomalies—times when Tiffany’s presence seemed too convenient, moments when crucial data about Gotham’s underworld went missing from the Batcomputer, or when confidential mission details were leaked through channels Tim knew the Batfamily didn’t use. Times when the Joker seemed to know the family's course of action and times when villains knew Duke's plans.
That’s when it clicked.
Tiffany wasn’t just trying to fit in with the family. She was spying. Her affections with the family were a cover for something darker. She had been gathering intelligence for a shadowy organization, feeding them vital information about their operations. This was bigger than him—this was a full-blown infiltration. Tiffany was working for someone else, someone dangerous.
Tiffany’s betrayal ran deep, and her spying wasn’t just about information anymore; it was personal. She had been stealing pieces of your life, your successes, your talents , your family. She had slowly taken everything that you had worked for and twisted it into her own false narrative. It was sickening.
Tim couldn’t stand it anymore. He had dug through encrypted files, tracked hidden transmissions, and pieced together cryptic conversations. Tiffany wasn’t just trying to steal your identity for the sake of becoming the perfect family member. No. She was mimicking your cooking and baking skills, down to the awards she had won for those very talents. She had been trying to erase you and replace you with a manufactured version of herself.
It was almost too much for Tim to handle. But there was something even worse lurking beneath the surface: the deeper he dug, the more it became clear that Tiffany wasn’t just feeding information to criminals. She had been feeding off your spirit, your presence and she had nearly replaced you entirely.
Now he just needed to tell the other.
The tension in the Batcave could be cut with a knife as Tim stood before Bruce, Dick, Jason, Damian, Duke, Cass, Steph, Barbara, and Alfred, ready to show them what he had discovered.
“I’ve been tracking Tiffany’s movements for the last few days,” Tim began, his voice low but sharp. “And I found something that’s... unsettling.”
Bruce, who had been scanning a mission report, looked up with interest. Dick turned to Tim, a puzzled expression on his face. Alfred stepped forward, his usual composed demeanor now replaced with a rare concern. Even Damian looked confused.
“What did you find, Master Tim?” Alfred asked, his tone calm, but there was a flicker of unease in his eyes.
Tim didn’t hesitate. He clicked a button on the computer, and the large screen behind him flickered to life. A series of encrypted files appeared—mission logs, surveillance footage, and even intercepted communications. The Batcave was suffocating in its silence as Tim presented the evidence to Bruce, Dick, Jason, Alfred, and the others. His fingers flew over the keyboard, and every new image, every new file, felt like a punch in the gut.
There was a long silence as everyone processed the information. Bruce’s usual stoic expression faltered for a moment, and Dick clenched his fists. The weight of the revelation was hitting hard, but it wasn’t just the betrayal that hurt. It was that someone in their midst had been pulling the strings behind their backs for a year.
The data was damning. It was all there, proof that Tiffany had been copying your recipes, your designs, your machines, even stealing the culinary awards that you had earned over the years. And on top of that, she had been siphoning critical Batfamily intel to an unknown organisation. The information was so sensitive, it could have jeopardized every single one of them.
“Do you see it now?” Tim’s voice was quieter, but his anger was unmistakable. He flicked the last file onto the screen. Tiffany’s false accomplishments, stolen directly from you. The stolen recipes. The mission intel sent out from the Batcomputer under her watch. “All of us have been blind to it.”
“About a month ago,” Tim said, “I found an odd encryption pattern in the Batcomputer—something I’ve never seen before. When I decrypted it, I found a set of mission details. Ones that shouldn’t have left the system. I traced the origin back to Tiffany.”
Alfred's face tightened as he took in the footage on the screen. It was a recording of Tiffany accessing classified Batfamily data, tapping into their most sensitive files.
“She’s been stealing information,” Tim continued, his voice gaining intensity. “Every single time she’s interacted with the Batcomputer, she’s been sending that data out to an unknown address. I can't track where it's coming from, it's too advanced; even for me.
“Impossible,” Bruce muttered, but his eyes were narrowing in disbelief. “Why would she—?”
“Because she’s a spy,” Tim interrupted, “and it gets worse. She’s been feeding them everything. Our weaknesses, our next moves, our schedules. She’s not just a mole in the manor. She’s been working against us this whole time. She's why so many missions have failed.Tim’s eyes narrowed. “It’s not just the family’s accomplishments she’s been stealing. She’s been getting close to each of us, using our trust. She knows things, personal things, and she’s been leaking that information. She’s been feeding it to the highest bidder, giving Gotham’s worst players a playbook for taking us down.”
Dick’s face twisted with disbelief. “She was pretending to be (y/n), taking her accomplishments as her own, but—” He trailed off, his voice faltering. “How could we have let this happen? How did we not notice?”
Jason’s voice cut through the heavy silence, rough and sharp, like a crack of thunder. He stepped forward, fists clenched. “I should’ve known. She’s been playing everyone, pretending like she’s all sweet and innocent, but she was using all of us.” Jason’s eyes flicked to the screen, then back at Tim, his face a mask of fury. “She lied to me. She’s been lying to all of us. And she’s been trying to replace her.” His hand slammed onto the table, and the anger in his voice was unmistakable. “She doesn’t belong here. We trusted her. We all trusted her.” Jason’s anger bubbled over. This betrayal, the way Tiffany had wormed her way into their lives, made him see red
He couldn’t keep it in any longer. “I should’ve known,” Jason spat, pacing in circles, his fists clenched tight at his sides. “I let her get close to me. I let her in, we all did! And now look at this. She’s been pretending to be everything she’s not. She’s been trying to take her place, her rightful place in this family!”
Alfred, who had been silent until now, cleared his throat, his voice filled with quiet but growing fury. “I should have seen it,” he muttered, his gaze darkening. “I was too lenient with her. I allowed her to slip through the cracks, to play at being part of this family. I should have known better.” His usually calm demeanor was cracking, and the regret in his voice was palpable.
Bruce’s lips pressed into a thin line as the weight of Tim’s words sank in. His eyes hardened as he stared at the screen, disappointment creeping into his features. Tiffany had been their guest, their supposed family, and this whole time, she had been playing them all. You had tried to warn them.
Duke, who had been standing quietly at the back of the room, spoke up. His voice was low but steady.
“I knew something was off,” Duke said, his eyes fixed on the screen. “I couldn’t put my finger on it, but... she’d been acting weird around me. Always asking questions—asking about the family, the missions, everything. I thought I was paranoid.”
Damian had always been fiercely protective of what he considered his, no one could ever doubt that. He mocked you, saw you as his pathetic bastard older sister, he had wanted to hurt you. But now, as the reality of Tiffany’s betrayal settled in, something darker began to take root inside him. He remember your unconditional love for him, how you took everything he said did to you with grace and compassion. He remembered how good you were to him. He noticed that everything he thought he loved about Tiffany was what she stole from you. His eyes burned with rage as he thought about how Tiffany had wormed her way into the family and his heart, how she’d stolen your accomplishments, and how she’d attempted to erase his sibling from the very fabric of their world.
She was trying to replace her. That thought alone made his fists tighten, nails biting into his palms.
It had been a long time since Damian had felt this kind of protective rage. He was the blood of the Wayne family, the one who deserved to be at the center of it all, but you; his blood sibling, his equal, had always been ignored, undervalued ridiculed and neglected. And now Tiffany, a mere interloper, had dared to manipulate and tear him away from you.
Damian watched the family, his gaze flicking to each of them as they tried to process the betrayal. The anger from his family was palpable, but there was something else there too: possessiveness. Protectiveness. regret. They weren’t just angry at Tiffany for what she had done to you, they were furious at themselves for pushing you away and leaving you alone and unprotected in New York.
You were his responsibility, his blood, and no one; not even Tiffany, was going to steal you away from him. He had always wanted to prove his superiority to the others, but now that wasn’t his focus. His attention was fixed solely on bringing you back to him, where you belonged.
Cass, who had been silently observing, nodded. Her face was unreadable, but the tension in her jaw told Tim that she, too, had been sensing something wrong for weeks.
Steph, ever the sharp observer, had her arms crossed over her chest, her usual sarcasm now tempered with a cold seriousness. “I knew she wasn’t perfect, but this? This is next-level crazy. Are you sure bout this Time?” She leaned forward, her voice suddenly harder.
Barbra was too shocked to say anything. This was not how today was supposed to go.
Alfred glanced toward Bruce. “Master Bruce,” he said softly, “the level of infiltration, this is something I never anticipated. We should have seen the signs.”
Bruce’s expression was steely. “We were too distracted, too willing to accept her presence as part of the family. We let our guard down.”
“That’s not just her fault,” Dick interjected. “We’ve all been too trusting. Especially with everything that happened with (y/n).” His voice hardened as he glanced at the screen again, eyes flicking to Tim. “What now? What do we do about it?”
Tim stepped forward, his fingers hovering over the keyboard. “I’ve already notified our allies. The information she’s passed is enough to give this organization an upper hand in Gotham, maybe beyond. She hasn't revealed our identities but she might soon. we can’t let her get away with it. She’s been playing us this whole time.”
Steph threw her hands up in exasperation. “So what, we just let her go? She’s been lying to us, manipulating us for months! ?”
Tim’s eyes were cold, calculating. “We’ll have to trap her. Use the information she’s already stolen to set her up. Once we confront her, we’ll make sure she doesn’t get away.”
Bruce’s fists were clenched at his sides, his jaw set in stone. He had failed [Y/N]—he had failed his child. The weight of that was too much for him to bear. “This ends now. We’re going to fix this.”
Ok yall since apparently 8 ppl think my work is absoulte shit and and SURE i knew how they felt this is pretty rushed and i feel like it sucks! anyway!! i hope at least some people enjoy <33 send in nice aks and questions and ideas pls. its so fun answering them. yall are mind readers and are so creative!! lmk if there's any typos bc I copy-pasted half of it from my notes app. yeah i did write half of this when i was supposed to be in class, and??? Next chapter Tiffany gets confronted, reader comes home, Batfam start groveling and regretting their actions, sort of on their way to yandere-ism and make reader move back to gotham to be closer to "family"
#yandere dc#yandere batfam#yandere batman#yandere bruce wayne#yandere jason todd#yandere damian wayne#yandere tim drake#yandere x reader#platonic yandere batman#damian wayne x y/n#yandere dick grayson#yandere dick grayson x reader#yandere batman x reader#yandere batfamily#yandere batfam x reader#yandere batfamily x reader#yandere platonic batfamily#yandere batboys#platonic yandere#yandere damian x reader#platonic batfam#yandere bruce wayne x reader#yandere red hood#yandere red robin#yandere jason todd x reader
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do you see anyone other than me? (baby please) | rafayel (lnds)
✮ tags ; rafayel x fem+ afab!reader, established relationships, dom!reader, sub!rafayel, gentle femdom, oral (m!recieving + some f!recieving), anal (m!recieving), praise kink (so much), dirty talk (SO much),pegging / topping, top!reader, bottom!rafayel dry orgasms 18+
✮ wc ; 6.9k (come on man)
✮ a/n ; reader and mc do not share a personality in this. reader is intentionally meant to have like... a more serious personality. so they are mc but not at the same time if that makes sense sdkjskj.
also i know this guy but only a little bit. i was planning on binging the main story after caleb got released but got ?? caught up writing this?? this has happened twice im so scared
✮ synopsis ; making sure rafayel actually forgives you is at the top of your priorities.
When you come home from the office, take your shoes off, and turn the corner into the living room—you know without looking that Rafayel is in a mood.
Not a good one.
It���s something in the air, a lingering tension that makes all movement stiff as you attempt to navigate through the unease. You find Rafayel on the couch. Soft, deep lavender waves tussled like he’s been tossing and turning - pressed into the side of the couch. All curled up small.
Somehow, you just know what sort of attitude you’ll be met with. You know your lover well enough to know that he’ll be moody but you’ve less confidence in regards to what that mood may be.
Taking a deep breath, you step into the wide expanse of Rafayel’s living room and studio. His head turns, bangs falling in his face as you slide your work bag off from your shoulder to set aside. Your keys, noisy as you set them down, even gently—trying to leave the air undisturbed. He’s looking at you from over his shoulder but realizes he can’t completely see you that way. Instead of standing to his feet to come greet you, he drops his head back on the arm of the couch to stare at you upside down in a tense silence.
You give him a look. His mood is sour. Maybe more than you thought. He smiles first, then frowns unhappily before turning his attention back to what he was doing. You hear small scratching noises—he’s sketching. You wonder how long he’s been sitting there doing that, since he usually just prefers to paint without thinking too hard.
After that, he doesn’t look at you. He doesn’t greet you, either.
“I’m home.” You say evenly. You think about being placating from the jump, but without knowing his exact reason - you worry you’ll only worsen the state of affairs.
Rafayel hums. “Welcome home.”
Your brain wracks through every possibility on what could be the source of this level of moodiness. Sometimes, his moody behavior is for kicks but it’s not this time. If it was, he’d lay it on thickly. Act theatrically towards you, get in your face about it.
But he’s tense, forceful—every scratch of his pencil is too harsh like it’s rife with irritation. You tread carefully.
“Can I sit with you?”
“Why are you asking? Don’t you live here too? Just because I bought the couches with my money doesn’t mean—“
“Rafayel.” You say, interrupting him. He scowls at you. “Can I?”
As if more bothered by you being level, he huffs. It’s followed with a business smile over his shoulder. “Sure. Do whatever you want.”
You choose to sit on the empty end of the couch where Rafayel does his sketching - fitting yourself in the gap of his space near his feet. You slide yourself in then gently lift his legs into your lap. Rafayel gives you a look when you do this, clearly debating on whether or not he should reject your act of goodwill. Ultimately he stays.
Notably, while his pencil is still scratching on paper - you think by this point he’s not really sketching anything at all.
“I got off of work late,” You explain. You rest your hands on his calf gently. “There was an incident near the station but it was a false alarm so I ended up being cleared.”
“Oh? Is that so?”
Warm, you think. You nod.
“There’s been a lot of Metaflux increases in the residential districts close to our headquarters. It’s odd.” You explain. Rafayel is quiet, looking at his nails disinterested. You go on, not taking offense. “Strange as it is, there’s been no active threats. Still, given the location, it needs a lot of man power to be investigated.”
Rafayel sits quietly, unreadable. You continue on. “So it’s been busy. I think we’ve cleared the level of threat, so another team will probably take over soon.”
“Hm.” Rafayel says, a petulant edge to his voice. Warmer. “So that’s why you’ve been so late this week. I guess it’s good that nothing happened. It must’ve been difficult, so difficult if you could barely spend time with your one and only lover. But I guess it’s fine, it’s not like there’s anything you can do in that circumstances. Well, you could’ve done a lot but if it didn’t occur to you there’s nothing to be said, then again—why would it—“
Hot. “Rafayel.”
“What.”
“I’m sorry for being late,” You say.
A beat. His frown deepens.
“And?”
You pause before answering, smiling apologetically. “For not keeping in contact with you more.”
Some of the life returns to him. You’ve deduced the source of his bad mood, which means the only thing left is to alleviate it. You don’t like seeing him upset. He’s quick to forgive you, always optimistic and trying to keep your relationship lighthearted.
But there is an underlying desire in him that makes you more conscious about any minor infringements. Despite himself, Rafayel is more concerned about you liking him than he’ll ever let on in his life. Even when he’s upset, he’ll forgive you - but the feelings linger until they explode. When he gets like that, it’s much harder to comfort him.
It’ll fester if you don’t apologize properly. You know him well enough to know that and you love him well enough to not want to see when disaster strikes.
(Plus, there’s something about the way he’s still pouting. He’s trying to relax, but it’s there. It’s cute to you. It makes you want to kiss it better.)
“I’m sorry,” You offer. You reach for the hand resting in his lap and he lets you take it, though it’s limp. You press a kiss to the back of it, eyes full of affection. “I’m not used to having someone wait for me,”
Rafayel makes another face at you, unreadable. “Not just anyone.”
You laugh lightly. “That’s true.”
Squeezing his hand tighter, you kiss it one more time. “Can I make it up to you…?”
“I don’t know. Can you?”
“I’d like to,” You offer, another kiss - just higher on back of his hand. Closer towards his wrist. “Whatever you wanted.”
“Whatever I want is a tempting offer, Miss Bodyguard. What a talent for bargaining you have, indeed. Maybe you should try bidding a one of my auctions, just to see.”
“I’d bid too high off the bat. I’d go bankrupt,” You tease back, a sweet lilt to your voice that makes Rafayel’s eyes shimmer, fond of your wit. “Would you be willing to keep me if I gave it all up that way, I wonder?”
“Since it was for me, I could consider being merciful.”
You give him sincere but small smile and Rafayel seems to warm up seeing it. He can be coy, even playful about his affection but there’s something about him today that feels more shy then it does anything else.
“If I can ask for whatever I want,” Rafayel starts. “Maybe we could start with paying back your dues. After all you owe me your full undivided attention after your week of neglect.”
“That’s easy.” You say, charming. Rafayel makes a face at you that makes you want to laugh. “I wanted to give you that anyway. Is that all?”
“Are you telling me to be more demanding? You think that’s a wise choice?”
“If it makes you happy, I’ll play the fool.”
It’s corny, deliberately not something you’d say to anyone else or at any other time. Something that Rafayel might say to you in a different circumstance, so in a way you’ve simply beat him to the punch. He goes through several feelings, each passing over his expression. Amusement to disbelief to embarrassment even he can’t cover up too easily.
Great risk comes with great reward. Yours is a smiling Rafayel, boyish and amused. Color returned to him, a playful air of mischief about him.
“Well if you’re that desperate to make it up to me, then I guess I could try to forgive you. Gosh, you must be so desperate if you’re willing to act this way. You’ve totally fallen for me, haven’t you?”
Yes, you think. Too much of that at once and he’ll get shy again. You’ll have plenty of coaxing to do later so you keep the thought to yourself. You smile at him instead. “So, you’ve anymore demands for me, my liege?”
Rafayel hums before breaking out into a grin. “Hmm. For now, just one.” He offers you his hand. “Take me upstairs.”
__
Rafayel has a way about him, with you and only you, that makes you especially weak to his advances.
Whatever those advances are, however taxing on you they may be—there’s so rarely a time where you can tell him no. He likes having that much influence over you, no matter what his particular mood is. If he’s feeling the desire to keep you under his thumb or be at your mercy. Whats central to him in each instance is that he has the full breadth of your attention, your desire, and most importantly—your lacking will to resist.
You like it all because you like Rafayel. Like how it feels trying to hold onto him as he slips between your fingers.
If someone asked you what you like most, though - it’d be this.
Not quite at your mercy but expectant of your devotion. Crystalline eyes and long, straight lashes blinking up at you with unwitting demand, crowding around you mercilessly. A gaze that weakens you, disarms you, demands your propriety.
“What are you thinking about?”
His words come out more annoyed than he wants them to. Your eyes come back into focus to Rafayel on top of you, in your lap as you lean against the headboard. His weight settled like he’s something that fits there perfectly and he does. Your hand reaches for his lower back, eyes tracing down the damp skin. Button shirt opened just loose enough to catch glimpse of his collarbones, with only boxers underneath. Your hands run down his sides, smooth down his bare thighs - mesmerized by cream colored skin that begs for blemishes.
His expression bewitches you even when your mind had prepared you for it. You smile almost lazily, drawing him just a little closer to you until your noses touch. “Of you.”
He scoffs at you. “Is that so? Not that you have no reason to think about your perfect, darling lover—it’s just that it seems like he’s the last thing on your mind these days, so you know,-“
You kiss him. It’s only partially to shut him up. It’s mostly because him talking makes you look at the shape of his mouth, the curve of his lips—the way he’s pouting at you. It’s almost too much. You part after a minute, careful not to deepen the kiss.
He has something to say after the fact, dazed - hands on your shoulders trying to give himself the room to speak before you kiss him again.
But you don’t relent. You kiss him harder, a hand around the back of his neck - slipping your tongue against his lips in the way you like. He doesn’t concede. You’re not really expecting him to. He kisses back even harder like he’s trying to prove a point - teeth digging into your lower lip. A little too sharp for human, but perfect for him.
You pull away breathless. A hand still on the nape of his neck, sliding around enough to feel his pulse under your thumb. Thump, thump, thump—rabbit quick. You smile at him suggestively, proving him displeased.
“Don’t interrupt me. Trying to kiss me when I’m airing out my complaints is unprofessional and rude, I’ll have you know.”
“I’m sorry,” Your lips brush his jawbone. “It’s hard to think about talking when you’re half-naked on top of me.”
“You can be so vulgar. It’s shocking. You’re usually all serious and about work and then sometimes you look like a dog waiting to be told it can have the treat on it’s nose,” Rafayel says airily. Fake haughty, voice colored with coyness. You look up at him. “Does it really count as making it up to me if all you’re doing is lusting after me?”
You don’t deny him at face value. “You set the standard. You tell me. Do you feel like I’m still making it up to you or should I work a little harder?”
There’s something between you. A spark of electricity that fizzles and pops, tension deepening. Rafayel likes playing tug of war with you. Even though he’s expecting to be pampered - there’s nothing easy about letting him. But it works when you keep yourself even. Eager. Having your desire and lust for him out in the open gives him the power again and he likes that, even when it’s mostly pretend.
“Work harder. You have to earn your paycheck Miss Bodyguard.” He says. You laugh a little, sitting up a little straighter.
“Yes boss,” You reply. You lean forward, pulling his weight down as your hands slide underneath the loose, flowy button up. Your hands find his waist, holding his sides before gliding them up on the planes of his back. He’s got lean muscle, a swimmers build that feels tight to the touch.
You kiss him on the lips again, tongue sweeping against his lower lip. Rafayel playfully rejects it when you do. You pull away one hand to cup the back of his neck and force the kiss deeper, tongue pressing the closed seam of his lips until he yield and lets you. He melts at the gesture rather unwittingly, the softest little whimper sounding as you feel your tongues touch. It’s a wet, hot kiss. Mouth sticky with spit and saliva.
“I’m working hard so you shouldn’t be too hard on me,” You say playfully. Rafayel rolls his hips, makes a noise for you as he huffs. “I want to make you feel good.”
“You’re—“
You interrupt him again. Not with a kiss on his mouth this time, but a chaste one to the very corner of of it - trailing down the soft curve of his jawline. You make the pressure on his neck featherlight. Thin skin prone to being sensitive, he melts at the soft touch. Cranes his neck up subconsciously to give you access to it. In the spirit of pampering him, you bite at the skin with a genuine hunger. Marking each bruise with a kiss first, you sink your teeth into him without remorse. Incisors scraping the delicate area before you suck hard, broken capillaries throbbing underneath your tongue when you lick them after the fact.
Deep, deep shades of red and purple bloom all over the column of his throat. It doesn’t feel like enough to you still.
“My neck hurts from all your biting.” His voice comes out in wet pants, betraying the sentiment. You laugh warmly at his attempt to diverge.
“Does it? Should I be gentler, then?” You offer. After you feel like you’ve marked his neck enough, you press another feather-light kiss right where his adams apple sits. Another on his clavicle. When it gets to his collarbone - you don’t do anything more than brush your lips.
Rafayel whines. It’s a throaty sound that makes your whole body break out into a shiver. Such a pleasant sound on the ears that your mind pictures instantly what other sounds he might make if you just had your way with him. It uncovers a selfish part of you. You could flip him over on your bed and take him if you wanted. Fuck him until he sings as punishment maybe for being tempting like a siren drawing a lone sailor into deep waters.
You keep the thoughts to yourself, and keep your composure. You ask again instead. “Come on. Tell me. Do you want me to touch you more gently?”
He fusses in your lap. You grin. “What’s the point in being gentle now if you’re being so rough to begin with? The change would be just weird, you know.”
“I guess it would,” You let yourself lick the same places you just kissed. You bite then hard enough to leave a mark and Rafayel arches himself into it. “It’s better like this then, right? If I leave marks all over you, then maybe you’ll feel less lonely when I get busy again.”
“I should get to leave them on you too. Your memory isn’t as sharp as it used to be. A physical reminder might do you some good, yes.”
His voice is trembling, despite himself. You pull away to look up at him, and catch sight of a fragility you sometimes forget he’s capable of. Brows drawn into a furrow, lips pulled into a pout. Like a wound reopened inside of him that he’s so desperate to cauterize but can’t. You want to kiss the lines between his brows and get on your knees for it. A proof of your affection.
“I’m sorry for being careless,” You say, sincere. Rafayel looks ready to quiet you, concerned about the mood but you proceed anyhow. You lift his shirt up and hold it to his mouth, and he bites without your instruction. Bare chest exposed to him, you flit your gaze to his face. “I can’t do anything but try to beg your forgiveness. Still,”
You kiss his sternum, your hands on his waist. You fingers trail down his sides, hands sliding back up to chest. His nipples are hard, damp skin cool to the touch. Your warm him with your fingers, rolling over the sensitive tips. Rafayel makes a muffled noise, his cock twitching responsively.
“All I ever really think about is you,” You say. Rafayel gives you a long, unreadable look as you toy with his chest. “I’m not the type to half-ass things so my thoughts always revolve around you. Finishing work to come home to you. If you’ve eaten or if you locked yourself in the studio to paint all day. If we should go somewhere together on my day off.”
You lean forward and stick your tongue out, taking his nipples into your mouth. You roll the other one with your hand to increase the pleasure - content as you watch his face begin to flush. He watches you so closely, the tips of his ears burning a bright red. You suck hard, wetting them with saliva before you take them gently between your teeth and tugging.
“I’m not good at balancing work with play. I’m also not very friendly so you’re the only person I’ve ever spent so much time dating” You hum, nuzzling his skin. “I’m sure down the line it’ll be harder. But, if it helps, it’s true that my heads always filled with you.”
Your hands grip his waist, pushing his hips forward slightly as you suck and bite his chest again. A line of saliva connects you both as you pull away - teethmark indentations in their place.
“I want to make you feel good,” You maneuver Rafayel until he’s underneath you. His expression reads as overwhelmed but the faint blush blooming all over his skin and the hazy look in his eyes makes you confident he’s feeling more than just uncertainty. More like restlessness. A desire to be touched as he lays on his back with you looming over him. “And to touch you everywhere.”
You lean into him, trailing kisses down the his chest. You can feel his pulse quicken again as you touch him, spreading his legs as you put your thumb inside the waistband of his boxers.
Like this, he looks especially enchanting. The sleeves of his shirt pulled over his palms, button-up bunched up underneath his chin, and tight gray boxer briefs snug around his hips. Your bedroom, dimly lit, casting shadow on the sinewy muscle. His chest heaves with anticipation, stomach tense as your lips trace a path down from chest to navel. Excitement wracks through his body.
You put a hand on his stomach and look up at him. “I want to leave my mark on all of it. I want your body to remember I felt this deep inside of you and shiver. You’ll be able to think of me half as much as I think of you.”
Rafayel heaves, eyes glossed over. “Shit, you’re so unfair. It’s like you have two personalities or something. Are you tricking me? Is it actually you in there?”
You smile a little, pleased by his reply.
You follow your instinct, sliding his boxers off and tossing them somewhere. Rafayel is hard. So hard it looks like it hurts. The tip of his cock is ruddy, wet with pre-cum and swollen. His dick is long. Stands up with a straight curve. You breathe on it, making Rafayel flinch with anticipation. Your eyes flicker up to his face, terrible pout betraying his feigned moodiness..
“Don’t tease me,” He voices. Arousal strikes through you like hot iron at the whine of his voice. Almost pitiful.
“Not today,” You promise.
You making yourself comfortable between Rafayel’s legs, sticking your tongue out to taste him. He smells like soap and skin, but the scent is still so arousing. Your head is heavy with it, senses suffocating, hands stabilizing themselves by grabbing hold of his thighs. Rafayel looks near overwhelmed from even the slightest touch. It’s uncharacteristic for him to be so quiet. Almost meek. He must be aching for you more than he lets on.
You let his cock rest against your face, nuzzling it with your cheek. His cock responds sweetly to the lewd act. He lets out a sigh about, subtly trying to shimmy away from the touch. Unable to win against your grip, he sinks back into the bed and takes a long breath.
“Keep your eyes on me,”
In the business of spoiling him, you leave your teasing to a minimum. You gather spit in your mouth and spit it onto his cock with force - relishing the his breath hitches. How his eyes widen just slightly. You stroke his shaft with a tight grip, bringing your head down suck lightly below the shaft of his cock. His head falls back again, mouth open in a silent plea.
Rafayel keens for you when you work him with the warm, wet cavern of your mouth. You use your hands to fondle him while you shift your attention to his length. Your lips placing hot kisses up until they stop at the slit - tongue dipping into and tasting precum. Salty and warm. You wet your lips again and brush them against his cock - watching the way his expression shifts at the sensation, lightly sucking as you build yourself up having him in your mouth.
He pitches his hips with desperation that spurs you to give him more pleasure. You open wide to take his cock into your mouth. The weight of it feels good. Arousal clouds your mind as you hollows your cheeks and stick your tongue out over your lip. He’s throbbing so hard it makes you lightheaded.
A minute passes as you just hold him in your mouth, getting your jaw used to the sensation before you put in work in making him feel good. Like steel over your velvet, you use your tongue to lap at the sensitive skin while spitting and drooling. You’re making a mess. The room echoes with the filthy noise of you swallowing and choking on Rafayel’s cock.
“Oh, fuck.”
Your eyes flicker up to Rafayel, trying not to crack a smile at the state of disarray he’s in. His expression is so twisted from pleasure. All of his features reflective of it. His blush seems to creep down even further the longer you go. Your body gradually heats up, core throbbing as you take him down. Take him slowly into the narrow canal of your throat, eyes watering.
You ease yourself down the very base - nose pressed against his navel, tongue over your lip. Rafayel’s fingers curl into the sheets underneath you trying not to buck his hips.
“Get off of me, I’ll cum.” He says, almost panicked. “Your throat feels so good. Y-your mouth is so hot and it’s making me feel so good, can’t—I can’t. You gotta get off or—”
His words of protest fall on deaf ears as you spread his legs even further. Wanting to make him feel better, you part them.
You’re greeted by pretty pink hole - already wet for you. A stream of spit follows as you pull off him.
Rafayel heaves in relief.
“You got yourself ready,” You say, less than ask. Rafayel rolls his eyes.
“So what if I did?”
“I wanted to do it for you.” You reply, pretending to sulk. “Told you I wanted to spoil you.”
He blushes further. “Don’t you have any sensibility? You’re doing more than enough. Being excessive, even.”
“I don’t believe in being excessive when it comes to you,” You hum. Sitting up, you reach over the bedside table for a bottle of lube. You pour it in excess on your two fingers before coming back down between his legs. The bed creaks under your weight.
Lube drips from your two fingers onto Rafayel’s hole, thick as you push the excess with two fingers. Both go in so smoothly it makes you smirk. He’s soft inside. It’s so easy for you to put both fingers inside of him, even easier to find his prostate - swollen from arousal. He must’ve fucked himself open like this on three fingers given how easily yours follow.
“It’s so wet inside. You must’ve really wanted me to fuck you.”
“So what if I—aah—did?”
“Well, I wanted to take you apart nice and slow.” You say, slowly rubbing your fingers against his prostate, pleased by the little oh noises he makes when you. Cum spills from the tip immediately. He’s so sensitive. You divulge your plans to him as you stretch him. “First with my mouth once or twice. I was going to save fucking you for the end but—“ You push your fingers deeper. To the knuckle. His eyes shoot wide open before his voice breaks into a moan. “Since I’m making it up to you you, I was wondering if I should just cut the chase and make you cum on my cock over and over and over. Maybe you’d prefer that.”
Rafayel’s eyes go wide. You feel a sense of accomplishment knowing without him telling you. He clears his throat, strangely sheepish.
“It’s not like the other stuff feels bad or anything—“
You make eye contact with him, sitting up on your knees. Your other hand cups the back of his neck as you press a third finger inside - fucking it in slowly. Rafayel moans unabashedly as you do. His skin is feverish as you press your forehead to his, noses brushing. The wet sound of you stretching him open makes you dizzy, shared breaths between you filling worsening your appetite for him.
“It’s not what you want though, is it? Not today anyway.” You say, leaning close enough to kiss. You don’t follow through, your voice low on a whisper. “Tell me how you were picturing me fucking you in the shower. I’ll give you whatever you want today,”
Rafayel seems to let go of the last threads of fight in him as you approach like this. You’re in the thick of your wanting for him. Your body and your mind hunger to make it feel so good it looks like carnage to everyone else. To be pleasured so ruthlessly he can barely move
He’s rarely too shy but right now he’s in the depths of his desires. He moans sweetly like this. It’s not a sound you can coax out of him easily. It sounds so perfect still. Mouth fallen open, his hands finding purchase in the back of your shirt.
“Want you to fuck me deeply,” He pants, like it’s straining to even thinking about it. “N-not too fast, but not too slow either. Want you, hngh,” Shivering, he tries to speak coherently as your eyes meet - lips barely touching but almost. “To p-praise me and—“
You grin. “You want to pampered while I fuck this pretty little hole, right?”
You push your fingers in harder. He whimpers. It’s loud and broken and makes grip on you tighter. He just nods. “Please. Fuck, please - need it now. In me, please.”
It’s exactly the words you’re interested in hearing. You kiss him on the lips deeply. He sinks completely into the touch, malleable under your fingertips.
“Shh, I know.” You hum, soothingly. Rafayel whines from the loss of contact as you pull your hand away.“You earned it. Just a little more.”
You stand up again on your knee, stripping yourself of the remaining garments left on your body from the work day. You unhook your bra and take it off along with your tank top in one go, tossing it somewhere on the floor.
Next come your slacks, tight from the way you’ve tucked silicone cock up against your stomach to be ready to fuck. You put it on earlier while he bathed - tucking it in your pants to keep it out of the way. Seeing you unzip your work slacks and have a heavy silicone cock fall from them evokes a reaction in Rafayel that endears you endlessly. A bitten lip while a shiver wracks through him.
Deciding your pants will get in the way, you make quick work of wriggling out of them completely before returning between Rafayel’s legs. You spit in your hand and stroke yourself with it, wetting your cock before letting it rest against Rafayel’s own.
“How do you want it?” You ask.
“Like this,” He says, unmoving. He seems certain on that end but he’s hesitating. “But I want you to…”
He looks away. You try not to grin but fail.
“You were being so bold a second ago,”
He rolls his eyes. “Well a second ago someone was trying to rearrange my insides so I didn’t have to think very hard,”
“So, should I do it again, then? I think we’ll get better results that way.”
“You’re so noisy. I don’t pay you for this,” He pauses. “I want you to hug me while we… like be close to me.”
You pause before smiling gently. You’re so charmed by the innocence of it. It’s so unlike him. Being away from you must’ve bothered him more than he cared to admit. Softening, instantly - you lean forward and press your lips to his forehead.
“Sure. Anything else?”
“Ugh. Not for now. But it’s annoying. I should be running you into the ground by now but here you are,”
“Making good on my promise?,” You finish. Rafayel doesn’t refute you. You kiss his shoulder blade. “Anything you want today. I’m yours.”
“Say it again,”
“All yours.”
He wraps his arms around your neck and pulls you down. “…Hurry up and fuck me then.”
Complying with his wishes, you sit back on your knees as you line your cock up with Rafayel’s entrance and push. He gasps as you slide the fat head of your cock in, a wicked smile on your face as you watch his hole stretch out and around you. Three fingers is more than enough prep. It makes filling him so easy.
Still, the stretch - the feeling of being full is nothing like just fingers. You watch as Rafayel’s body adjusts to it. Inch by inch, you rock your hips forward gently until he’s swallowed your cock up half-way. He’s trembling as you lean forward. Waiting for you to bottom out before he pulls you forward for as much skin to skin as he can have. Your chest squishes against him.
When his hips roll for you to go deeper, you take it as a sign. With all of your strength, you hold onto his waist bury yourself inside of him in another single thrust. His nails dig into your shoulder, his voice next to your ear as you. Tightening his grip, he cries out at the sudden movement
You can feel him shake underneath you, cock clenching hard while you hold him.
“Fuuck,” He goes stone stiff underneath you before starting to tremor more violently. “Fuck, oh fuck.”
Realization dawns on you a few seconds later. “Did—did you cum just from putting it in?”
He opens his eyes and frowns at you.
“Shut up. I didn’t get to cum earlier.”
You laugh. “You’ll kill me being this cute. I don’t know what to do.”
“I could give you an idea if you’re going to just sit there,”
His impatience amuses you.
“Sorry. I’ve got you. Cum as much as you want.”
You anchor yourself, pulling out slowly and internally groaning at the resistance as you do. How his hole grips onto you so tight it feels nearly hard to move despite know how stretched he is. A phantom sensation fills your waist as you feel his stomach shift as you thrust.
Heeding earlier requests, you use your hips to set a pace to fuck Rafayel the way he wants. The ins and outs of his body come naturally to you now. Finding the right pace, the right motion, the right angle - all come easier to you than you even remember. On muscle memory, you hike Rafayel’s legs up and begin to fuck him deep. Not too fast, not too slow - but consistent in grinding against that sweet spot. Deliberately thrusting your hips up, you try to direct all the remaining focus into fucking him as good as you can.
You know you’ve hit the right places when his grip on you gets tighter. His legs locked around your back, Rafayel is a mess underneath you even when you’ve barely begun. Like he can’t stop cumming, his body helplessly wound as your hips clap his ass.
The moans that come out of him, broken and sweet. More angelic then pornographic but lewd enough to make you dizzy with the urge to pin him up and fuck him harder. Groaning when you fuck him just right. You can feel his cock against your stomach with how close your bodies are as you grind - twitching. Pre-cum leaking in long spurts and wetting your skin.
You coo at him feeling it start to be easier to fuck him.
“It’s just like a pussy, huh? You take me so good inside of you. It feels like you were made for it,” You press kisses wherever your lips can find the skin. On his face, his mouth, on his shoulders. You can barely make sense of your own filth, your mind moving on it’s own as your body chases its own arousal. Your clit is grinding against the base of your strap-on so well like this, you could easily chase the high and find your own orgasm with seconds. You’re too busy paying attention to make well on it. “I like when you act cute like this. Usually you’d put up a fight about it but you’re asking without fuss. It’s precious seeing you fall apart on my cock.”
He moans your name like an incantation, another dribble of cum spilling. He can’t stop cumming. Just shuddering beneath you, his face in your shoulder and panting like he can’t find the words.
“All mine, yeah? Everything, all of you. It’s all mine to tend to, so you can be as selfish as you want.” You hum, encouraged by the whimpering repetition of please in his voice. He’s being so pliant, so good. You can’t help yourself. “Take when you need. Cum when it feels good for you. I want you to feel good. Want to make you feel so good you can’t stand it. Think you can do that? Come on,”
Rafayel moans brokenly into your neck. “I’m g-gonna cum so hard, fuck—feels like I can’t stop, please don’t stop, fuck me,”
“Shh it’s okay. I wont stop until you tell me.” You tuck yourself against his neck, kissing it before biting his ear lobe. He gasps. “Don’t think about anything other than cumming for me.”
“Fuck,” His nails dig into your biceps, coiling you around as you get close. “Fuck me. P-please—I’m cumming, I’m cu -“
Rafayels whole body stiffens under the weight of your body. You fuck him steady, pinning him down as he cums. His cock pushes hard against your stomach, twitching helplessly as his cum spills in streams. His back curls up, gripping onto you tightly as he moans loud and unabashed, euphoria splintering through his muscles. You fuck him through it until he rides out his high - his body loosening up as soon as it passes.
The sound of cum unsticking from your skin as you part from Rafayel makes you grin. You pull back out of slowly and get on your knees. You use your hand to wipe the cum off of your stomach and smear it against Rafayel’s hole.
“You made a mess,” You say brightly. Rafayel pants, looking up at you. Before you can ask, his voice trembles. He weakly reaches for your hand.
“Let me make you finish,” He says, abrupt. You blink at him owlishly. “Please.”
“Isn’t this about you?”
He frowns, looking at you seriously.
“It is. And I’m telling you I want you sit on my face and cum on it. Please.”
You give him a look before breaking out into a laugh. You stand onto your knees and undo the buckles of your harness - shimmying out of them. “I can’t refuse you if you ask like that but I don’t think it’ll be long.”
“It’ll just be once for now,”
“For now?”
He nods matter-of-factly. “You still owe me after the crimes of neglect you’ve committed against me.”
“Right.”
“And I’ve decided I want to exercise my rights to eat pussy until sunrise.”
“I see,” You say bemused. “And this is… revenge I take it? And not perhaps, an act of goodwill towards me.”
“I have no reason to show you good will, do I?”
You break out into more laughter.
“Right. We’ll be even after today then, at least.”
“Hurry,” Rafayel says again, after settling it. Same puppy dog look in his eyes as before, back in instant. You can’t help but be charmed by how quickly he reverts back into desiring your attention.
Rafayel lays down as you take your strap-on off and crawl over towards him. Deciding you’re not done with him for the day - you stand on your knees just over his chest and spread your pussy apart for him to see. He’s not expecting it, evidenced by the way his eyes go wide at the sight.
“Even without cumming, making you feel good turned me on this much. Is that what you were hoping to know?”
Rafayel goes flush again. “I never said that.”
“So difficult,” You hum. “Come on. Can I sit?”
Rafayel barely masks his enthusiasm as he nods. You crawl over him further before carefully setting yourself above his face. You try to avoid letting the full weight rest on him, but Rafayels hands are on you in an instant. With the same desperate grip he had while you were fucking him, he pulls your thighs down until your pussy is in his mouth - tongue out and lapping up wetness instantly. You shiver at the desperate movement of his tongue.
It gets your body hot all over again. Your fingers thread through the purple strands of hair for anchor as you push yourself against his willing mouth like you’re fucking his face. Your own desires hadn’t crossed your mind until now, but now that you’re aware of it - that familiar restless lust returns to you tenfold You shiver as the familiar flames of arousal stoke back up inside of you.
Your gut honeyed, sticky lust making your limbs feel thick. You use your other hand to tweak your nipples as you rock your hips back and forth. Rafayel lies underneath you obediently, eagerly - his hands helping you move at the pace you want without complaint. He always manages to surprise you. His willingness to give to you making you feel weak in the knees.
Already so worked up, it takes you hardly any time to reach your climax. You feel it in your waist, body going slack as the knot inside of your stomach uncoils. You let out a short cry, hands tightening in Rafayel’s hair as you cum all over his face - swearing as you do. You feel Rafayel moan against you, reverberating through you as you ride out your high and finish.
You pull away from his sated, pulling back to see him wiping his chin before licking his fingers. The look in his eyes sends an amused sort of arousal through you.
“You look like you’re going to eat me.” You say. Rafayel nods.
“I mean… I’m certainly trying.”
You laugh tiredly, swiping your thumb against his cheek with a smile.
“After we clean up and have dinner,” You say. “I have some mandatory time off so I won’t be called in.”
“I won’t let you sleep,” He says, clingy again - face pressed against your thigh. You grin. His many moods make you so weak to him.
You bend down to kiss his forehead.
“I wasn’t planning on it.”
✮ a/n ; rafayel fans . let me know if this was okay im lacking confidence but i had writing him. i want to keep like a spoiled housecat maybe.
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rapper!onyankopon.
just some head canons i have.
in my head im imagining a blend of dave and fridayy, where he can sing as well (he got variety!). same universe as my musicproducer!connie fic but reader is not famous here, as opposed to w/ connie’s. (lol i gave her a last name too—davis.) in my mind, im picturing ony from the uk and connie from ny.
★ * ° 🛰 °. 🌓 • .°• 🚀
rapper!ony who first pops up on the scene in a music video of his friend connie’s song. he wasn’t featured on the track, but rather just in the background getting hype with everyone else.
but y’all know how the girlies get when a fine black man/woman/person start trending.
rapper!ony who wasn’t shy about his craft, but just wasn’t big on social media. his agent hated it, he loved it. he simply released music, let people know, and then went about his business.
rapper!ony was trending and although he didn’t take this as an opportunity to get in his social media bag, his best friend, musicproducer!connie did!
rapper!ony who goes from a couple thousand people knowing what he does to over a million people screaming his lyrics at they’re phones on tiktok in ONE night.
“bro, you can’t even get mad at me gang!” connie yelled from his shower. ony was sitting outside, accosting his friend for what he did. “you said you didn’t care what happened to the project!”
“but tell me if you gon post it and make it a whole thing, nigga damn!” ony yelled back.
rapper!ony who now has to adjust to his quickly rising popularity. he has yet to know the number of artists looking for a feature; and he doesn’t know that he secretly has some of these industry boys shaking in their boots because where the hell he come from?
no, rapper!ony is too busy focusing on whyyy they’re a million fan edits of him across tiktok and instagram. clips of him from his streams, connie’s videos, and his other friend’s content.
ony groans as connie’s message banner pops up on his phone, the message being a link to a tiktok. when he clicked it, it was a fan edit of him using his song ‘when it comes to you’. “bro, who keeps sending these to you, man?!” ony exclaimed. connie heard it from his room and snickered.
rapper!ony who had to adjust to being the attention at these red carpet events. he usually just walked behind connie and his girl, along with the rest of the entourage but now he is getting stopped for photographs.
there’s nothing like listening to music live. so rapper!ony puts on a fake smile and pushes through the crowded carpet to get inside. he waves to people he’s worked with, artists, and fans who called out to him. all so he can hear some music.
he sees connie holding hands with his girlfriend, both of them making goofy faces at the cameras. he softly smiles at the couple, but before he could make way, connie somehow senses him and turns to him “ony! ven aquí!” damn!
rapper!ony who doesn’t expect much from the awards show. just to go, support connie, and go home. he was nominated,yeah, but he was also in the category with some of the most popular artists right now…so he wasn’t feeling all that confident.
rapper!ony who is shocked as shocked can be when his name is called from the podium for best new artist.
“F**CK YEAH!” connie yelled, jumping up from his seat along with his girl and the rest of the table—aran, zora, jean, armin, and mikasa.
rapper!ony who walks up on stage with connie who is still screaming from excitement.
“uhhh, i’m not gonna lie, mans weren’t expecting to win still.” ony laughed, running a hand over his fresh waves. the audience laughed with him.
“first i would like to thank God, the most high who has blessed me with this amazing opportunity. i want to thank my people for having my back; connie—this man,” ony pointed behind him to connie, who was full out filming the moment on his phone.
“who told me on a random day when we were cleaning out our college dorm room that if we made a project together we would be the new heartthrobs of the generation. connie i thank you for being you; having my back and working alongside me. my brother for life, that is.” connie screamed, and so did his girlfriend from the audience as the claps poured in.
“and finally, i want to thank my heart in human form. the woman who made all of this possible, y/n davis. she don’t like the attention so im gonna hear bout this name drop when i get home. but babes, i love you, and thank you for being my rib. i owe you the world and more. and to her parents, thank you for my better half. thank you lot again. love!” ony raised his hand with the award, smiling and waving to the crowd and cameras as he walked to the back.
meanwhile, across the country, cuddled up in her bed was y/n, who was watching the award show before going to sleep. she had expressed to ony she wasn’t too sure about going, not liking the cameras and attention. he reassured her it was okay because there wasn’t any way he would be winning with who else was in the category.
so…safe to say when you saw your boyfriend on the stage with the award in his hand, you could not contain your shock and excitement. you jumped out of bed screaming and quickly getting to your phone camera to record the tv. squeals and “yeah baby” was all you could say as he gave connie his thanks.
but then… when you heard him say your name, for everyone around the world to hear, everything just turned to shock as your phone fell from your frozen hands, still recording. you were stunned. he said your name. your government name. on national television.
“ONY!!!”
#🌞🍃spliffymae#ony x black reader#ony x y/n#rapper!ony#music producer connie#au#anime x black!reader#aot x black reader#attack on titan#onyankopon#onyankopon x black!reader#aot
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Hi idk if you're taking requests rn but can you please do if possible batfamily x male reader who's younger than dick but older than jason and he is really shy around batfamily because he came to the family after damian idk if this makes sense and while out on patrol an enemy injects him something that turned him into a toddler but he still has all his memory the rest is up to you im sorry if this doesn't make sense😭
It's fine, it makes perfect sense, don't worry my dear anon. I know exactly what you mean. Did I use this GIF before? Yes. Does it work in this context? Yes. And did I use this GIF for a story before where I also wrote about a shy reader? Yes.
Summary: (Y/N) is shy around his family. That is until he is turned into a toddler.
Warnings: shy (Y/N), (Y/N) is turned into a toddler, not a lot of bad warnings, besides mentioning Bruce being stabbed for the purpose of this one shot.
(Y/N) was always shy, even before Bruce adopted him. But that shyness completely intensified when he was adopted into the family. He was younger than Dick, but older than Jason, which would put him somewhere in the middle. If only he didn't come after Damian came into the family, it might have been easier.
Coming into a new family where there are already four siblings and you are the fifth one... It's not easy to say the very least. Meeting new people is not easy and (Y/N) always struggled with being shy and just over all... A bit overwhelmed. More often than not, (Y/N) could be found with a blush on his cheeks. Very quiet too... Feeling self conscious more often than not.
Bruce tried to make his son more comfortable. So did the other boys. All of them in their own ways. Bruce talked to (Y/N) about becoming a vigilante. Which (Y/N) thought was a good idea. But due to his shyness... (Y/N) was very hesitant to do so. He didn't want to impede anyone due to his shyness.
Bruce promised him that they could work on it and at the same time train to go out on patrol. Bruce wanted to make sure that (Y/N) is fully prepared to go out. Sometimes, (Y/N) could overthink a lot of things and Bruce wanted (Y/N) to just trust his gut feeling. Go with your gut, trust yourself.
Of course, an overthinker overthinks everything and that sometimes makes it a bit more difficult to function. Of course, overthinking for a while when it's your first few times being on patrol is normal, you are trying to get into your rhythm and to get the initial nerves out. But the problem is that (Y/N) is a chronical overthinker. So Bruce made sure to shadow (Y/N) all the time.
Bruce made sure to instruct his sons to do the same. To make sure that they shadowed (Y/N), just for his safety. (Y/N) didn't mind it, but he would like to have a tiny bit of autonomy and a little bit of confidence in himself.
His brothers were sympathetic to that, but Bruce's orders were still standing. And Bruce did know that (Y/N) was getting a bit restless and annoyed as he couldn't have some independence. But Bruce wanted to be sure that (Y/N) could take care of himself if he was alone. And after numerous conversations with Bruce, Bruce relented and (/YN) was happy to have a little bit more autonomy.
Bruce was still worried of course, but knew that (Y/N) could take care of himself. Just like all of his children could. But Bruce is always worried about all of his children. So, he made sure to put a tracker in (Y/N)'s suit.
Just in case, Bruce told himself, trying to ease his guilt of doing this.
He knows that he couldn't tell (Y/N) because he would freak out at Bruce. Where's the autonomy if you have a tracker? And (Y/N) was happy to be trusted enough to go on his own...
Bruce was caught in the middle.
Bruce was sitting in the Batcave, taking a night off due to a stab wound. And Alfred might have threatened him with certain things if he even thought about going out on patrol. So Bruce decided to be on the Bat computer, offering support for his kids and for them to go out on patrol alone, without him as physical backup.
It was all going good, but it was a full moon. And far too quiet. And Bruce knew that something was bound to happen. And he was right. But he expected one of his kids to be hurt. Maybe something broken.
Not (Y/N) being turned into a toddler. Bruce nearly fell out of his chair once he got told what happened. It was an up and coming villain, one that Bruce didn't want to see in Gotham city. He didn't know that the enemy was dabbling into stuff like that. He stood in shock as Dick was holding a little toddler, wrapped in Damian's cloak, since the suit was far too big on him now. The suit was in Damian's hands.
" Is (Y/N) okay? Do you know what his cognition levels are? Toddler or what? "
" I'm still a teen in my mind. " (Y/N) said quietly and Bruce sighed in relief. He didn't know how he would feel if he had an actual toddler in here. He has no experience in raising one and Bruce didn't think that he could even handle on. Bruce gently walked forward and took (Y/N) into his arms, trying to calm down his nerves.
(Y/N) was okay. That's what Bruce wanted to hear. He's okay. Not dead. Not harmed... Bruce sighed in relief as he held his son close to him. His shyest son, the one who overthinks everything, the one who often blushes...
" Are you okay? Are you hurt anywhere? " Bruce asked softly and (Y/N) nodded, seemingly not wanting to talk. Bruce didn't mind it. He could work with nods and shakes.
" Alright, lets find some clothes for you and then Alfred will feed you and then off to bed. " Bruce said to (Y/N), who nodded, happy to eat something.
Alfred watched in silence, still shocked, but soon recovered from it.
" I'll make you your favorite master (Y/N). Come on, lets go. " Bruce put (Y/N) down and (Y/N) walked over to Alfred, reaching for his hand. Alfred smiled as he led (Y/N) up to eat something.
Bruce then turned to his sons.
" Did you manage to catch the guy? " Bruce asked and everyone shook their heads.
" He got away. He was just within my reach. " Jason crossed his arms, looking pissed.
" It's okay Jason, don't blame yourself. Once I'm fully healed, I'll help you two. For now, we need to locate the enemy and ask him for how to reverse the affects. But for now... I'll enjoy this time. I've never had a chance to raise any of you as toddlers, " Bruce confessed and everyone chuckled.
That much was true, they were all older and no one came in when they were toddlers, they were more closer to teenage years. So Bruce would really like to enjoy this period.
Can anyone blame him?
And that's what they all did. They enjoyed this time with (Y/N), Bruce more than the others. Bruce enjoyed how much smaller (Y/N) was and the fact that he could carry him in his arms. Thank God for Bruce's workout plan. And the money to get all the things necessary. Thank God for that.
(Y/N) became a bit compact with the transformation so whenever he got nightmares or got scared in general. Bruce seemed to notice that fear intensified. More often than not, (Y/N) would climb into bed, seeking comfort in his dad. Bruce never minded. How could he? No one else minded either.
It was oddly nice to have a toddler in the home. And while yes, (Y/N) still has his memories as a teen and is not as whiny as a toddler would be so it's not a fair comparison per se, but still. They liked it. Jason loved teasing more than anything in the world. (Y/N) hated it and often whined about it like a toddler would and it made Jason even more amused.
Dick enjoyed this stage too. It's nice to have someone so small around here for some reason. Tim simply buried himself into work to find the enemy. Damian didn't know where to stand on this issue. While he loved his brother even before this, although never showed it outwardly, he wanted his older brother back.
Because this messes with your mind. You have an older brother who was got turned into a toddler. It messes with your perception too. Damian was a little bit freaked out a little bit by it. Okay, not a little, but still.
And yes, (Y/N) was annoyed being a toddler. Being too small to reach anything, Jason teasing him, everyone treating him like a baby... He's had enough of it. He wanted to get out of this little body as soon as possible.
He wanted to be back to him old self.
And that wish was granted when he has seen Bruce smiling after patrol, showing him a serum.
" This will bring you back to your old self. "
(Y/N) sighed in relief. Thank God.
#dc comics#dc x male reader#x male reader#batfamily#bruce wayne x male reader#batman x male reader#jason todd x male reader#red hood x male reader#dick grayson x male reader#nightwing x male reader#tim drake x male reader#red robin x male reader#damian wayne x male reader#robin x male reader
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we do a bit of trolling
CG: OKAY DAVE, I KNOW WE CAME TO A TRUCE ON THE WHOLE FOOD WARS SHTICK, I'M NOT ABOUT TO HURL TWENTY MORE INSULTS AT YOUR EARTH CUISINE, BUT.
CG: BUT WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT.
TG: man
TG: ok look i was kinda preoccupied with the seven minute voice message i left you about the infinite jump glitch in sonic 06 and it turns out i cant measure water and talk at the same time
CG: DON'T SLOSH IT!!! THAT'S DISGUSTING!!! IT LOOKS LIKE BILE!
TG: yeah well its the last pack of mac n sheese and im gonna eat it whatever viscosity it decides to have
TG: i can make this work
TG: is cheese soup a thing
TG: nah theres no way in hell
TG: k so what is your cooking proficiency like what are we dealing with here
CG: OH, I DON'T KNOW. I WOULD SAY I CAN PROBABLY FOLLOW BASIC INSTRUCTIONS, POSSIBLY LIKE THE ONES THAT WERE ON THE BACK OF YOUR SALIVATION-INDUCING SLOPFEST YOU'VE GOT GOING ON HERE.
TG: alright cool i got a pitch
TG: might work might dont
CG: THAT ISN'T SO MUCH INSPIRING CONFIDENCE IN ME AS IT IS TAKING WHAT MORSELS OF FAITH I HAD IN YOU OUT BACK AND THRASHING THEM IN A DARK ALLEYWAY.
TG: alright so im basing my operations on like the core features of water im talking the ten commandments of h2o-logy
TG: as the component responsible for the shlop of my shlock presented before you
TG: it can evaporate right
CG: … YEAH?
TG: ok but cheese doesnt evaporate does it you cant get a cheese mist
CG: OH NO.
TG: cheese doesnt evaporate it just like melts
TG: or dries
TG: so my theory is if i jam this shit in an oven or maybe the microwave
CG: NEITHER OF THOSE WERE IN THE INSTRUCTIONS AND YOU KNOW IT
TG: but the problem is the pasta is already cooked and all up in there so if i microwave it the pastas gonna go soggy and i cant have that
CG: DAVE.
TG: so microwave is out of the picture im assuming oven heat will keep the pasta dry while also evaporatin the water without removing the cheese
TG: that checks out doesnt it
CG: CUT THE BULLSHIT. STOP EMBARRASSING YOURSELF.
CG: YOUR INSISTENCE ON UPSTAGING YOUR OWN STUPIDITY IN FRONT OF ME ISN'T CUTE OR ENDEARING. I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE TRYING TO PULL AND I'M NOT FA--
CG:
CG: WAIT… NO… WOULD-- WOULD THAT…?
TG: real brain wrinkler huh
CG: OH SUCK MY FAT FUCKING SHAME GLOBES
TG: dude you even pointed out the tripwire and you still went ahead and threw yourself over it what kind of troll are you
CG: I DIDN'T FALL FOR SHIT! OBVIOUSLY MY ATTEMPT TO HUMOR YOUR RAPIDLY DETERIORATING SENSE OF "INTELLIGENCE" WENT CLEAN OVER YOUR NUGBONE! YOU'VE PROVEN YOUR POINT, MY FAITH IN YOU IS COMPLETELY MISPLACED.
CG: WOOPS! SILLY ME FOR BELIEVING IN YOU! WHY DO I EVEN BOTHER?
TG: hahahaha oh man
#davekat#dave strider#karkat vantas#homestuck#inspired by the iasip binge i been on lately#comix#we do a bit of trolling
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hii!! i know you are busy with the but im a cheerleader nat fic, but do you think you might maybe write more for Lottie?
also thoughts on meangirl Lottie.. i feel like when she first meets someone she can be a little guarded, wanting to keep her image so when you call her out on her bs she feels attacked and then starts a rivalry between the two.. anyways to summarise meanlottie tension with the new girl on the team when Lottie takes it too far and says something really mean at a party and new girl storms off but Lottie finds her and shows her how much she DOESNT hate her because shes actually a softie but she kind of treats new girl as a punching bag bc shes new and called her out
Im genuinely so sorry if this doesnt make sense i am so bad at explaining but i have a vision i swear😔
🫎 anon :)
i love this idea so much 🫎 anon!! hopefully i got your vision here!!
lottie matthews, you should’ve realized sooner, is untouchable.
at least, that’s how she wants people to perceive her.
everyone on the team knows better than to test lottie; even jackie, the whs’ golden girl in her own right, lets her have her moments.
you, on the other hand? you’re new. maybe that’s why you didn’t seem to get the memo right from the beginning.
it starts small enough: a subtle jab at practice, a teasing remark about your form, the kind of thing that could be dismissed as playful banter if not for the smug tone in lottie’s voice. and then there are the looks: the way her dark eyes flick over you during drills, sizing you up for reasons you can’t seem to wrap your head around.
it doesn’t take long for you to call her out.
“got something to say, matthews?” you ask one day, sharp enough to draw a few surprised glances from your teammates.
for a second, lottie looks genuinely caught off guard. and then her mask slips back into place, her lips curving into that insufferably confident smile. “i’m just looking out for the team,” she says. “can’t have the new girl slowing us down.”
from that moment on, it’s war between you.
lottie calls you out for each fumbled pass in practice. in the locker room, she’s leaning against the row of lockers closest to yours, waiting for you to pass to call out a snarky comment. and even during team meetings, when you make a suggestion about changing up a play, lottie scoffs. “sure,” she says, leaning back in her chair. “let’s just toss out what’s been working because you think you know better!”
things only reach a breaking point weeks later, at one of the parties.
you don’t even remember what starts it: some offhand comment about your outfit, maybe, or the way you’ve been talking to nat a little too long for lottie’s liking. either way, her words hit harder this time, meaner than usual.
“god, you’re so desperate to fit in,” she says suddenly “it’s pathetic!”
the words land like a slap, loud enough for everyone nearby to hear.
for a second, all you can do is stare at her, your chest tight and your pulse pounding in your ears. lottie doesn’t look away. she stands her ground, her arms still crossed over her chest.
nat shifts beside you, clearly uncomfortable, but she doesn’t intervene. no one does.
you don’t trust yourself to speak, not when your voice feels like it might crack and give her the satisfaction she’s so clearly looking for. instead, you turn on your heel and push through the crowd, ignoring the whispers as you walk out.
lottie finds you a little while later, sitting on the back steps of the house with your head in your hands. you don’t hear her approach until she’s right beside you and says: “i shouldn’t have said that,”
you flinch, whipping around to face her. “what do you want, lottie?” you snap. “haven’t you done enough for one night?”
her usually upright posture falters as she stuffs her hands into the pockets of her jacket, her gaze flicking between you and the ground. “i didn’t mean it,” lottie says, quieter this time. “i just…i don’t know.” she sighs, running a hand through her hair. “you get under my skin!”
you let out a bitter laugh. “glad i could be of service then”
“that’s not-” lottie cuts herself off. “i’m not good at this, okay? you called me out, and i didn’t know how to deal with it, so i pushed back. too hard. i know that.”
when you look up, you’re surprised to see something raw in her expression. regret.
“i don’t hate you,” she says finally, her voice soft but insistent. “i don’t even think i dislike you, if i’m being honest. i just…i don’t know how to handle you!”
before you can respond, lottie crouches in front of you, close enough that you can see the faint flush on her cheeks. “you’re not pathetic,” she murmurs. “far from it. and i’m sorry if i made you feel like you were!”
you’re unsure how to process the vulnerability she’s laying bare. this isn’t the untouchable, put-together lottie you’ve come to know. this is someone softer, someone who’s trying, even if she doesn’t quite know how.
lottie seems to take your lack of an answer as a bad sign, her lips pressing into a thin line. “let me make it up to you,” she says, her voice barely above a whisper. “please.”
#lottie matthews Ღ#🫎 anon#lottie matthews x reader#lottie matthews x female reader#lottie matthews x fem!reader#lottie matthews x you#yellowjackets#yellowjackets x reader#yellowjackets x female reader#yellowjackets x you
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My Personal Solar Return Observations Pt I
I just got into astrology more and I’ve been suupeerrr into solar return observations lately and this is what I have observed from my own chart! My birthday was 2 months ago and the solar return is SOLAR RETURNING .
Moon in 8h in Aquarius SR - TONS of family secrets coming to the surface. Almost concerning? . Im finding out soo much stuff about my parents . My home environment is also changing a lot, my dad used to be home a lot and now my dad has like completely abandoned me lmaooo . such a strange uranus energy since aquarius is ruled by uranus . Ive been feeling more independent lately and sometimes I dissociate and pretend im living in LA in my own studio alone and away from my unstable family 😍….. I have my chart ruler in here too haha (pray for me) 😊 so this year is definitely going to be transforming AF . Im sensing it everything feels too intense lately 👁️ ..
Cancer Rising SR - I’ve been dealing with a lot of family stuff over the years (toxic relationships that r still ongoing lmaoaoa) and im noticing that instead of digging myself deeper or being depressed, i’ve been nurturing myself more and turning my space into a cozy sanctuary and not into some bed rotting mess😹. Ive been improving my current living situation compared to the past so theres definitely nurturing myself more , saying affirmations in the mirror , working on my self care , getting offered help from my step-family.
Sun in 12H in Cancer SR - I got into astrology a lot of spiritual stuff . Also communicating with my spirit guides more often etc .. I definitely do feel more connected to my spirit guides now I feel im being guided and protected a lot this year . everything feels like its just meant to happen and i mean that in the best way . Getting vivid dreams, ive been writing them down more a lot lately and they’ve been giving me insights on my subconscious and even slight deja vu? I remember I dreamt of me and my dad in my aunts car and 2 days later she had called me and gotten upset because my dad took her car and hadnt brought it back after she let him borrow it for a few hours. Even though my sleep schedule is so bad i love dreaming more now because the universe always gifts me with something meaningful and beautiful in my dreams🙏. Also I been listening to music like A Looottttt more lately EVEN WHEN IM ASLEEP😭 im like oohhh whos playing this banger and i wake up and its just music thats been on shuffle for the past 9 hours 💀
Venus 12H in Cancer 10° SR - finding out what i want in relationships , although i do feel like its becoming hard to connect with others in that way ..? does that make sense ? ive been doing lots of self love affirmations that my dreams consist of love and harmonious energies 😹sometimes ill think about love and a boyfriend and really want it but the next day ill be like wow i love myself so much i really cannot see myself with anyone😇.. lots of creative solitude , being more open to recieve love from my family members AFTER REFUSING multiple times ( it makes me icky sometimes still ) learning compassion and forgiveness for others , im a scorpio moon in my natal so ive held grudges since 6th grade i never cared 😭😭😩.. but this venus in 12h is like reversing the effect… 👁️💧
Venus Conjuct Asc in Cancer SR - GLOW UP PLACEMENT 🙏 i was sexy before but its like my sexiness increased by like 10x . People are noticing it too!! i got told “bros evolving” on one of my posts 😭😭 I also feel like im finding my own personal style aswell! . I also see my body changing (in a good way)
Sun conjuct Asc in Cancer SR - confidence on 1000!!! feeling self assured , nobody can really tell me anything bad about me TO ME and think ILL believe it cuz i wont!! i know who i am thankqqq😛
Mercury 1h in Cancer SR - i feel like this placement helped add onto me becoming so self assured in myself and figuring out who i truly am . Ive been studying and researching about myself a lootttt too !! Ive been getting a lot of gut feelings and just proceeding with them and usually i wont and ill just go with logic but idgaf anymore because usually these gut feelings usually lead to something so worth the outcome whether it may look good or bad!
Mars 11h in Taurus 12° SR - I have lots of amazing goals and things im looking forward to for this year!! I feel so eager to just GO FOR IT but taurus is a slow and steady sign so thats just how i been moving lately .. in silence too cuz there be haters all around 🤐
Pluto 7h in Aquarius 1° SR - ive been unfriending a lot of people to make new friendships idk if thats a bad thing but all the past people i feel are secretly plotting against me… most likely that 1° because i heard that could represent enemies? take that with a grain of salt but anyway ive been more clearer about what i want in friendships aswell which is goal oriented people who just want to get rich and make something for themselves!!! Im tired of the self limiting beliefs and the envy!!!
Saturn 9h in Pisces 19° SR - I start my senior year this month and I plan on graduating early , saturn rules discipline and structure but also setbacks . i feel like this school year although i have that vision i feel like im gonna have to put a lot of work this year lmao i hate school so much i was supposed to go to summer school but i ended up not going to get my mind right before the school year started which has really helped tho imo . i wanted to drop out but at the same time my pride is too high and i feel like this is a great opportunity to build discipline, time management and responsibility for the goals that ill have after i graduate. ive already been setting the milestones and all which is the saturn and pisces influence comin thru 🙏
Neptune 9h in Pisces 29° SR - the 29° usually the “fame indicator degree” can also represent a start to completion/ending of something , since i would be focused on graduating early for my senior year i could see this as me graduating early and completing that academic journey and preparing and embracing a new journey . i feel like this would most likely be spiritual because i caaannooottt focus on school and astrology and spirituality all at the same time because 9 times out of 10 my focus is on astrology and spirituality i needa get my priorities straight😭😩😹..
Just wanted to note this but while reading your SR chart its important to look at your South Node aswell because it can show you what lessons and patterns you need to review / past influences & comfort zones . 1h nn = 7h sn , 2h nn = 8h sn , 3h nn = 9h sn , 4h nn = 10h sn , 5h nn = 11h sn , and so on
North Node 10h in Aries&South Node 4h in Libra - The SN 4h Libra and NN 10H Aries could show that I have to balance my growth and comfort and moving towards new opportunities. With South Node in the 4H in Libra, I may find myself relying on familiar comforts from my past . The south node here might show that I might fall back into old family dynamics . my step family is offering for me to move in with them to help me get back up on my feet and this is such a good opportunity but they did this before though last year and I ended up moving back with my neglectful dad and I just fell depressedddddd . ill prolly release my old patterns where I would be moving away from family support because last year my mom offered to help me and support me and i ended up being manipulated and i fell depressed again then went to my step dad for help so i can get ahead and i went back with my dad and got even more depressed lmaoo but ill see how this ends up playing out. With the north node in the 10h in aries , i’ve been really focused on building my own unique self image instead of just catering to what others expected of me . Ill be looking forward to the goals I have planned out while actively working on them . With the influence of Aries too, bold and courageous, I’d most likely be taking risks to pursue my goals and stepping out my comfort zone. Probably by being SO FED UP with my controlling dad that I just take that leap 💯
this is my first observation post i was gonna go to sleep but i was dedicated to finish this tonight, i hope this was insightful to many of you and may this year bring all of us sweet blessings ⭐️
#solar return chart#solar return#solar return observations#astrology community#astro observations#astro notes#astro community#moon 8h#solar return observation#astrology lunar return#saturn 9h
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Could you make headcanons abt a confident!chubby!poc!reader. Like when i search up haikyui x chubby reader all i get are hurt comfort stories about being insecure, and like everyone gets insecure but it gets to the point where people think everyone who isnt built like a coke bottle hates themselves 🙄. AND DONT GET ME STARTED ON THE ONES MADE FOR POC!!! Cause why are they all so stereotypical?! Like just because im black doesn’t mean im sexy redds clone😭🙏🏽.
Anyways back to the main plot🤭. I was thinking like reader with a style that has y2k/mcbling aspects (lowrise jeans, crop tops, chunky jewlery, etc) and is super bubbly. And back to he chubby thing, like ok. When i read x chubby readers, its always like fat ass and a lil bit of tummy, which is fine cause some people are built like that but not a lot🧍🏽♀️🧍🏽♀️. Like i have thighs, big boobs(pray for my spine🫡🙏🏽😭) and tummy, but I also have hipdips that dig into my butt bro. So like yea🧍🏽♀️. Haikyuu headcanons (you can pick the characters you think will fit🫶🏽) x confident!chubby!poc! reader
(i apologize for the yap session i have lots of opinions on this topic)
Chubby!POC!Reader x Haikyuu Headcanons
ft: literally like half the team members of all the main teams
warnings: cussing
oh pal dw about it lmfao i get what u mean!! i hope these hcs satiate ur cravings 👍
since u didn't ask for any specific characters i just came up with a few hcs that i think could apply to multiple characters lol
credits: divider .
He lowkey likes it when people look at his partner and assume he can't carry them, but then he just goes "oh yeah? lemme just-" *picks u up and puts u on his shoulder without a single hint of struggling* 👍
Ushijima, Bokuto, Kuroo, Atsumu, Sakusa, Iwaizumi (but he wouldn't say it outloud lmao).
Can't pick you up? No problem, they wanna be the ones getting picked up anyways.
Yachi, Yamaguchi, Kenma, Tendou (u cant convince me he doesnt like getting picked up)
Can't pick you up? unacceptable. They're begging your forgiveness and spending hours at the gym until they can do it. Just give them a few months.
Nishinoya, Hinata, Hoshiumi, Kageyama, Terushima, Levi.
Became an absolute pro at finding your exact foundation shade. Like, has your exact match pinned down. Could just look at a foundation color and go "yeah that's their shade". Some may think it's a bit weird, but honestly it's so helpful sometimes.
Ushijima's autistic ass, Tsukishima, Sugawara, Asahi, Yachi, Sakusa and Osamu maybe?
Gets so excited over fashion, makeup, jewelry and all that stuff. Goes shopping/thrifting with you, pays for your nails and is very enthusiastic whenever you ask for their opinion on your outfits. Also lets you give them makeovers sometimes. They will absolutely serve cunt if you ask them to.
Hinata, Nishinoya, Atsumu, Yamaguchi, Tendou, Kuroo, Bokuto, Oikawa, Yachi, maybe Levi lmao. Hot take but Ushijima would absolutely do it too.
Does encourage your passions and interest and stuff but their sense of fashion is that of a rock. If rocks wore crocs with socks. Still go shopping with u tho and they make up for their lack of advice by paying for all ur stuff. They spoil u so fricking much.
Tsukishima, Kageyama, Akaashi, Iwaizumi, Suna, Daichi, Sakusa, Ennoshita, Kenma.
Paints/writes/does photography and will make the most beautiful jaw dropping mouth watering gorgeous absolutely stunning works of art portraying you in such a beautifully realistic way. They get your colors and shapes and curves so perfectly well, it's incredible– it shows just how much attention they pay to every little detail about you, and how much they love all of it.
Daichi, Asahi, Ushijima, Osamu, Ennoshita, Sakusa, Yamaguchi, Yachi, maybe Kageyama.
#haikyuu#haikyuu!!#hq!!#hq#haikyuu x reader#asahi x reader#ushijima x reader#hinata x reader#kageyama x reader#yamaguchi x reader#yachi x reader#kuroo x reader#bokuto x reader#iwaizumi x reader#tendou x reader#tsukishima x reader#sakusa x reader#atsumu x reader#nishinoya x reader#daichi x reader#sugawara x reader#haikyuu headcanons#chubby!reader#poc!reader#gn!reader#ushouldask
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Could you do some rival Headcanons between epic and cross sans fighting over us? Like every second you cannot breath, each of them trying to one up each other to show who would treat you better. This idea has been floating in my head for a bit, so just wanted to finally request it. (Also, can we be gender neutral? And romantic, obviously) Thank you and have a good day/night! :)
Hello hun! Sorry this took me a little while - I've had to work more than normal recently. But THANK YOU FOR THE ASK!! I thi k this is my first from a non-moot so im so excited to be able to write this for you! I hope you have a lovely day / night as well :D sorry if this isnt that long, im trying to get some confidence in my writing lolol
Epic & Cross x Reader
Cross doesn't like fighting Epic since they are pretty close but this doesn't stop him from getting competitive.
Epic, on the other hand, loves play fighting and competing with Cross! He's not aggressive about it, he just does it for fun.
Cross is usually trying to prove himself worthy of your affection in some way while Epic just likes flirting and making you laugh.
Epic is surprisingly good at flirting but often settles for making you laugh because he loves it so much.
Sometimes Epic flirts with cross too just to fuck with him lmaoo - Cross is always baffled and a mess when it happens. Its pretty funny to watch tbh.
Most people assume youre a polycule. Epic doesnt help dispel that with his flirting. I mean a poly relationship could probably work.
You will never know alone time again if you don't set those boundaries. They're both Clingy!!
Given the chance, Cross will escort you everywhere - hes like your own personal bodygaurd. (You dont know how he knows your schedule so well or how he finds you so easily when going out.)
Epic also shows up a lot. Hes usually the one initiating lunch & dinner dates between y'all. Well, its not obvious theyre dates but they basically are, lmao.
They do try to one up each other but you'll next to never see them fight. You may catch them bickering about who did better, though. Epic likes instigating and Cross can be sassy.
They may have a fight about you once. Other than that they are chill because they're so close and Epic often gets Cross to communicate.
The fight would probably be mostly on Cross. He would get mad that he fell for someone his best friend likes. He would be upset that he "couldn't have someone himself" both because he feels guilty about Epic and for personal issues (he's lost a lot). Then he'd be mad that he thought that way and felt jealous. He wouldn't like how selfish he feels. Epic talks him through it, though. And talks some sense into him :]
Cross may be quiet most of the time but he is hanging around more often than not. He's just sort of ... supervising lol. Its comforting in an odd way. He likes the quality time too.
Sometimes Epic gets you alone, though. He gets you two to do relaxing things together like a picnic or video games.
He can be surprisingly tender and romantic but he will ruin it with a joke after surprising you or flustering you with the romance so cherish the moment while you can. Good luck, too. ;P
Cross is a mixed bag. One moment he's purposely suave and dashing then the next he cant get a sentence out . Its like he has moments of clarity then goes back to being a dork.
On a few occasions they will team up on you. I don't think they would really plan it unless it was your birthday or something special like that. When they do it it's usually just an accident and their moods synced to cause chaos.
When they team up they are menaces! Epic would be all gentle and romantic with flirty, witty remarks while Cross would be the type to guide you by the small of your back, leaning in to tell you things. And you know he'd be saying stuff like he's your personal knight! "I'll always be there for you." || "if you ever need anything just come to me, I'll take care of you." And shit like that.
Augh they would have you cornered but like in a good way. Cross always behind you, making sure you're safe while Epic leads you around by the hand. I hate them. I actually love them damn it.
Sometimes they get needy and steal you away for a while. The dorks.
Epic "kidnaps" you to cuddle up somewhere and read or watch a movie. He's very touchy (respectfully) so if you're okay with it he will be all over you. He especially loves it if you act as his weighted blanket and lay on him.
Cross gets grouchy and takes you somewhere on an "adventure". Most of the time it'll be somewhere without people. If the place has rough terrain he'll likely try to convince you to let him carry you lol. "You got it?" / "you tired?" / "want help?" Any reason to be close or touching you if you'll allow it.
If you're more of a low and mellow energy person he'll set up a special spot where he sets up stuff for one of your hobbies (if he can) somewhere hidden and will hang out with you.
Stars forbid you give only one of them a gift. They won't guilt you or be mean, but they will rub it in the others face subtly. If they're the one who didnt get something then Epic would jokingly act all clingy and pouty while Cross glares at him. Speaking of, Cross would stand closer than normal and Low-key pout if he didn't get something. Like a cat who wants something from you.
If you're the more affectionate, touchy type then you're going to likely always have one of them touching you if they're around. Epic practically hangs off of you while Cross just has a hand on you somehow. They have probably scent marked you, accidentally or not. They just clingy bois.
Also - not in a kinky way - but Cross has a high chance of biting you during prolonged physical contact lol. It's just a quirk of his. Its like cuteness aggression but in a loving way. You can think of it as kisses it a way.
He wouldn't mention it if you dont but it is a good way to fluster him >:3c
As for trying to be better than each other i think they would choose some things you like and try to be "the best" at it?? Like... lets say you collect shells. Suddenly they are finding great shells - in tact and pretty - and giving them to you. Same with trinkets. Or finding weird coffee mugs if you like those.
Epic also is that bitch who has a lot of money and just sugar daddies his friends LMAOO. You want that expensive thing? Dont worry bby hes got it kcjsbsbsb. If hes crushing on you it just gets worse and more ridiculous.
Cross is the one who has dedication to getting you things. So if something is about timing or searching hard for it he's the one to go to. He also just brings you random things like a bird..?? You dont even know where he gets half the stuff he shows up with. You may even just find stuff on a table in your house randomly.
Also, for no apparent reason, kareoke becomes a thing between y'all. You have no choice /j
#epic sans x reader#epic sans#epic x reader#cross x reader#cross sans x reader#x reader#cross sans x you#epic sans x you#x you#x you fluff#cross is lowkey a yandere but its fine#epic is like “its chill we can share”#they feel like a package deal but are okay with it if you only choose one#GVShark headcanons#GVShark writes
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UNHINGED DISTANT VOICES THOUGHTS (or: now we don't have time to unpack all of that julian but --)
this ep has such a banger concept (several banger concepts that should have had an ep all to themselves, really), even if its overall implementation is pretty mid. the idea that julian seems to readily believe that the most central voices inside him are aggression, fear/suspicion, doubt, confidence/sense of adventure, professionalism... and garak, being surprisingly, seductively good at tennis and taking care of him :}
in a doylist perspective I don't think this is well-crafted enough to read into it too deeply before it starts to fall gently apart, but through a watsonian lens and my fannish heart this is fucking fascinating fdsjka. where. where are all the positive feelings and sides of you that aren't about bickering with garak julian. are you okay julian. I like that since the augment storyline hadn't been conceived of yet at this point, you could look back and justify Julian's surge of confidence at the end as him realizing the lethean hasn't been able to get that deep in his mind to find what that whole mess must look like in his brain. 'you don't understand me half as well as you think you do' gains such depth, basically accidentally
'I'm a part of you, remember? I know what you know. Well... maybe a little more.'
'Still the man of mystery?'
'Oh, you wouldn't have me any other way.'
what. the FUCK fhdskjha. what's more gay, the lethean having picked through bashir's brains for this characterization of garak and their relationship (that Bashir easily buys and depends on through the ep), or him seeing half a minute max of julian and garak having lunch and uh. drawing his own conclusions, apparently. wild stuff)
Isn't this also the first time we see Julian actually play tennis with someone? All the other times it's been racquetball, right? Well well. Interesting. is all I'll say.
avery brooks does SUCH a good job changing his voice in this to match julian's doctor voice, I almost jumped in surprise when he was talking b/c that certainly isn't sisko's voice coming out of sisko's mouth
garak alternatingly going 'now -- what do you want me to do?' in a very... willing directable sort of way and telling julian that he's a good boy doing good and being so supportive and attentive and that's how the lethean tries to keep julian's shields down the longest. many thoughts. few of them PG.
JULIAN'S REASONING THAT THIS REALLY ISN'T GARAK -- NOT EVEN HIS MIND'S VERSION OF GARAK -- IS THAT THIS GARAK ISN'T COMPETENT ENOUGH FSDKJFHKSDJ. and he sounds so petulant about it too. 'the real garak would have this fixed for me a long time ago if I just batted my eyelashes and told him I thought cylon pareg's body of work was very interesting and layered :'( I miss him'
jazdia julian BROtp got me crying in quark's tonight, this was such a good direction to take that relationship. I know they kind of fuck it up again in s7 but y'know I'll take the good stuff while it's here haha
julian makes for such an amazing crotchety old man im love him
julian has a near-lethal stress dream about turning 30 and being bisexual. it's weird but very entertaining, and garak is there
#star trek#star trek ds9#ds9#julian bashir#garashir#distant voices#if this is incoherent or insane... that's exactly how this ep made me feel that checks out call it diegetic or something
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Maurauders Era Characters if they were Demigods (with explanations)
ive been listening to Epic and rereading my harry potter writing (really trying to work on my fanfic, im just stretched kinda thin)
edit: here is pt. 2
anyway
this is pt. 1 because I will be doing more, and golden trio era characters too
Remus Lupin:
This boy is the most Son of Athena kid i have ever seen in my entire life look at him He is so smart in so many different ways I just he's so quick witted and brave, and he was so ready to throw himself into battle. strategizing to use his unique attributes even when his superiors (who had political leanings) told him otherwise. But his intellect doesn't mean he has a lack of empathy he's also really crafty but not in the "hot gluing pieces of felt in the basement" type of crafty he's just got such a good mind
James Potter:
Ok ok so hear me out Hermes. Hermes Hermes Hermes. Hermes is the god of so many things-- Jack of all trades, really, and James is just so damn good at everything he does. He's also incredibly fast on a broom. He makes friends wherever he goes (pretty fitting if your father is the god of travellers) and is mischevious without dipping into the villain area (most of the time).
Sirius Black:
Aphrodite. Hands down. Did not have to think when I said this. Everyone at school is fully aware that he is attractive and he can charm almost anyone. he is very charismatic. He can speak French and I BELIEVE Italian... ok it just... makes sense to me... (btw regulus will be in pt. 2)
Peter Pettigrew:
Also Hermes. Let me explain-- Beyond the fact that it would justify him feeling closer to James, we can use the other side of the Hermes coin for this. Hermes is the god of pretty much anything you encounter on the road. Hermes is not evil or anything-- but he does technically protect thieves and liars. Peter and James have parallels that make me believe both of them would be sons of Hermes, but their hearts were different.
Lily Evans:
This one was hard. I was thinking Demeter- then Apollo- then Athena- Hestia isnt an option but like, it might fit if it was-- I'm gonna say Athena because while YES, she does learn healing magic, she's also just incredibly bright in general. She and Remus are both brainchildren ok She's also very witty in her comebacks and stubborn-- im referring to her behavior in general, not just when it comes to james. For example, even though Petunia hated her, she still was so determined to have a good relationship with her sister.
Mary MacDonald:
OO, oo, i want to say Aphrodite, but then I remember that sirius is aphrodite and that would be WEIRD but if sirius was anyone elses kid, mary would be an aphrodite kid, i just, like? look at her. she celebrates her femininity, she's so confident in herself, i love her
other than aphrodite, I might say... Hebe. Seems like a deep reach, but she's the goddess of youth.
Marlene McKinnon:
APOLLO. Apollo. Apollo. Marlene has always wanted to be a healer. She's also a great flyer. I don't know what else to say about it but like- Apollo? yes, yes
#remus lupin#james potter#sirius black#peter pettigrew#atyd#atyd remus#atyd sirius#harry potter#wolfstar#atyd marauders#atyd fandom#mauraders#lily evans#mary macdonald#marlene mckinnon#epic the musical#greek mythology#greek gods#the maruaders#marauders era
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Collection of WIPs for my newest honkai 3rd AU: a synth- and post-punk band AU! featuring the band “Mirror Mirage”
More art and an explanation further below
I dont want to put too many details down yet since i intend to do more with this and don’t necessarily want to spoil future story stuff, but the gist of it is that its an AU focused on the villainous Herrscher personas (except Veli, but she fits the vibe lol)
The tentative setting I’m working with for now is Central Florida and its meant to be a more serious/realistic AU with a focus on young adult life, not late-teens stuff. Think less “fun times at Perfect Fairytale College(TM) with my besties! Lets have fun and study today!” and more “rent is due, my roommates are assholes, the hourly bus is 20 minutes late again, and i almost got hit by a drunk driver on my way to work for the third time week and it’s only Tuesday”. That sort of thing lmao
I’m not sure if there’s any real interest in a story that focuses more on some underrated characters like Herrscher Mei (not normal Mei as a Herrscher, but her alternate persona), much less a story that also deals with more serious IRL issues
Mei is bassist and a vocalist, formerly lead until Kiana (more precisely HoV in Honkai terms) joined; Mei also handles the finances as she is an accountant in her day job working at a community redevelopment agency. Has a strong sense of justice and puts on an air of confidence and superiority on stage and when fending off hostile folks, but acts with great humility with the ordinary people she encounters in her daily life.
Kiana is the (new) lead vocalist. Works the graveyard shift at a gas station and is a self-proclaimed “cynical asshole” that barely gets along with anyone else; also plays the guitar occasionally. She was dragged in by Mei and reluctantly joined the band, leading to an awkward and tense relationship with the others, but her incredible skill as a vocalist means the rest of them put up with her shitty attitude.
Seele is the lead guitarist; she is an immigrant from Estonia and came to the US with Elysia a couple years back, in early 2022. Keeps in touch w/ Bronya, who is still living back in Europe. Tends to be a bit withdrawn but is very loyal to the band and would throw hands to protect the crew. Seele has Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID) and is a system comprised of two alters: Saule and Veliona. Veliona is the one that actively plays in the band.
Elysia (HoC in Honkai terms) is the synth player and mixer, and does a lot of work in planning and executing complicated tracks both live and in studio recordings. Despite being having no local heritage, she loves switching between a southern cowgirl persona and her usual preppy nice-girl persona. Since Elysia is said to be from “Vladivostok 51” in Honkai canon, that would make her Russian; however for the purposes of this story im headcanoning her as Ukrainian (which ik is far from Vladivostok irl), simply to mix things up a bit, lol
Fu Hua (Senti in Honkai terms) is the drummer; still a college student, shes a bit of an odd one out in the group, but was there since the beginning and has grown close with the rest. Has a bit of an attitude and says cocky things, but is much more timid at heart and acts a lot more calm with her friends at school.
A huge part of the inspiration for this story is a desire to try and depict the more ordinary aspects of urban life, adding flavor to mundane daily activities without relying on magic or scifi or high-octane action and drama. The villains of the story aren’t comic book supervillains, but rather its the various systems that the characters have to live within- corrupt governance, financial struggle, societal divide, etc.
I also really want to tell a story that emphasizes the queer experience. Not just the usual lovey-dovey girls-love stuff, but what life is actually like for real women in real sapphic relationships when living in the state that passed the infamous “Don’t Say Gay” bill IRL. As much as I love the canon KiaMei relationship in Honkai 3rd, i think it’s hella sanitized and can’t really convey the depth of the history and culture of the LGBTQ+ community. So I’m hoping to address this by placing their relationship in a specific real setting, one where LGBTQ+ folks (including myself) have to fight for our rights, acceptance, and representation.
As for musical inspiration I largely draw from a few big sources: one of the bigger inspirations is ASTROPHYSICS & MINTTT, as well as more recently Chappell Roan; genre influences include rock/punk, synth/EDM, and Sovietwave! This is both inspiration for their vibes and also for what type of music i imagine this band would play
The last image is a more suggestive one but ive hastily and sloppily censored it, so hopefully that is okay with y’all x-x
I rarely make spicier content like this, but having listened to The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess for the first time today and then listening to it 4 more times in a row, I couldn’t help but push the limits of what i usually do just that little bit, lol
#cw suggestive#shout out to anyone that actually recognizes any of the scenes or structures in my crappy little bakcground sketches lmao#y’all dont understand just how much this AU means to me akskkskskskdkc vdcbjhsdgbjid#I love this cast of characters so much and I really think they deserve better than what the story left them with#at least in most cases lol#honkai impact 3rd#honkai 3rd#hi3rd#honkai fanart#honkai impact#kiana kaslana#herrscher of the void#raiden mei#herrscher of thunder#hi3 elysia#honkai elysia#herrscher of corruption#honkai seele#seele vollerei#honkai veliona#fu hua#honkai hua#honkai senti#herrscher of sentience#if i listen to California one more time i think im gonna melt into a puddle of tears and nostalgia and pure yearning#also the final sketch was heavily inspired by Femininomenon and im thinking of adding the chorus as background text#idk if i will yet tho
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