#im just. UGH. unhinged about this game.

[vultures-and-scavengers]

cullen is 100% unqualified.

cullen is unqualified for the role he ends up playing, but also there is NO ONE in thedas who would be qualified.

he is creating an entirely new military and on a massive scale. he is not taking a place in an already established structure. you can be a general who spent their life in the military, but if that military has been around, then you are not creating a power structure, you are taking your place in one. much of this has been organized for you.

and militaries are not just infantry. you need to set up A LOT.

you need construction. you need to be able to house your people. you need fortifications to project your objectives. you need storage space because you will need a fuck ton of supplies. you might need bridges and you might need walls and you need to be able to be flexible with what you have the ability to build.

you need acquisitions. you need to know appropriate amounts of supplies you need. you need to be able to outfit your soldiers with the gear they need, which can change depending on their assignment. you need to know the supplies you're acquiring come from reputable sources and are not sabotaged in any way. you need to have redundancies within your supply chain.

you need transportation. you need to be able to move people. you need to be able to move food. you need to be able to move weapons and armor. you need these transports to be secure and well guarded. you need to (probably) vary their routes so you don't risk predictable convoys being seized. you need animals to provide transportation. you need stablehands who also need housing and pay and food and supplies. you need to feed the animals. you need to fulfill your animals' needs adequately. you need medical care for your animals.

you need personnel management. you need to feed them. you need to manage morale and you need to manage pay. you need to know how to encourage cohesion within units while making sure those units can work with others. you need to assign differing specialties and duties appropriately and you need to provide guidance for how each role should be filled.

you need to train them. this is not just swinging a sword; this is enemy recognition, this is how to work within a rank structure, this is how to operate within a highly regulated environment. you need your people to be educated enough to handle what tasks they need to carry out. you need exercises and wargaming so your people know what to expect from the field.

you need coherent rank structure. you need uniforms so your people know who they are and who those around them. you need to plan units with different capabilities that also fall within a coherent rank structure. you need to have emblems for ranks that are easy to read. you need guidelines and standards for what is expected of different ranks because different ranks have vastly different responsibilities. you need to have standards for promotion and demotion.

you need regulation. you need to ban criminal activity. you need standards for discipline. you need to write all the guidelines and be able to provide them to your units. you need one set of rules that all your units adhere to. you need to balance the needs of the people serving with the regulations that need to be written. you need appropriate ways to alter regulations and then publicize these changes.

you need doctrine. you need to plan out how you fight and why. how do you strategize. how do your larger tactics filter down to the smallest fighting units. how centralized or how flexible is your command structure. how are you appropriately using the resources you have. how do you work with allies. why are your units set up the way they are.

you need health services. you need pest management. you need disease control. you need battlefield medicine. you need standard guidelines for triage and care that all your healers understand so they're not doing wildly different things. you need care for long term issues like broken bones. you need to consider what to do with people who are in long-term care. you need to consider what happens to those who are injured and no longer able to serve.

you need security. you need to know your communications are encrypted, obfuscated, or otherwise made difficult to intercept. you need counterintelligence. you need to have guards on patrol. you need to secure your food and water sources. you need to secure incoming shipments.

this is not at all a complete list. but cullen has to find people who can organize all of this, or he has to organize it himself. he is starting from scratch. the inquisition has nothing at the beginning. there is not a single person in thedas who knows how to come up with all this on the scale that the inquisition will require of cullen and with haste.

the inquisition's army must respond to multiple unprecedented threats: hole in the sky raining demons, tears in reality all over ferelden and orlais, red templars, a tevinter cult led by a returned darkspawn magister with a quasi-archdemon, and an army of mind-controlled wardens and demons.

respond. not plan for. they have to pivot and face these things, which all present different challenges and require different tools and methods to fix.

so yes. he is unqualified. fucking find me someone who isn't.

[ashipiko]

“This summer that I spent with you? I’ll never, eeever forget it!”

UGH. KAZBANTEN. MY WEAKNESS IM SO BUMMED THEY DONT HAVE CONTENT WITH ALL THREE OF THEM…… CAN SOMEONE WRITE A FIC OR SMTH WHERE ALL THREE OF EM GO HANG OUT AND HAVE FUN??????? LIKE….. SWEET SWEET POTENTIAL I’m telling y’all my top 3 in games never miss as a dynamic!!!!!! I LOVE THEM SO MUCH THO. SO I HAD TO DRAW SMTH FOR THEM i can’t stop thinking of them!!!!

HEADCANONS FOR THEM UNDER CUT!

—Tenma and Banri once invited Kazunari ONCE to a karaoke outing and now it doesn’t feel the same without him. they sing either the most beautiful song w 10/10 harmonization or bankaz make it unhinged while tenma laughs while trying to join in

—Kazunari and Banri have both starred in Tenma’s MVs or movies 🫶 first time it happened and Tenma told em Banri spat out his drink onto Kazunari and all hell broke loose

—They go on cafe outings to talk about their ✨feelings✨ <3 like “how’s your love life going?” “none of your business” “oh so you’re bitchless” “WHAT” they are each others wingmen!!!!!!!!! MSKZ AND TNYK CONTENT FOR ME (I do not ship banri w anyone in canon 😔)

—they also go on runs!!! Tenma leads and Banri follows easily while Kazunari freaking DIES its so. “CAN YOU GUYS STOP HOLY *WHEEZE* I CANT. I CANT. LET ME PAINT LET ME DRINK PAINT WATER AAAAhgah” “kazunari we’ve barely passed a mile???”

—they bully eachother. they gang up on eachother and also betray eachother CONSTANTLY. banri has thrown hands with tenma and kazunari has it in his favorites folder

—they have a tiktok just to do trends 🙏 tenma only participated in the “non-stupid ones where I can just dance in peace” but like half of the TikTok’s are pranking tenma

[crowleys-hips]

2, 10, 22 and 24 for the ask game! Hope you're having a good day 💙

elloo thank youu i hope you're having a good day too 🐍

2. What was it that drew you to Good Omens, and what was it that sucked you into the fandom?

*breaks down sobbing lungs burning chest contracting heaving shuddering gasping for breath mascara running down my cheeks snot dripping from my nose* ahem sorry needed a little moment of drama it's all cool now dw about me im absolutely hella gucci never been better 😎 anyway where were we oh yea

when i was a teen i used to sort of like this one author but i can't remember the name for some reason, i just kinda remember picking up literally every single thing of his i could get my hands on, i mean, super casually, i wasn't obsessed or anything. and so i saw his name on the title, saw it had a demon and an angel and something about Armageddon and then i blinked and had somehow consumed the whole thing.

then flash forward to 2019, i see ohh they made a series of that one book i kinda sorta very casually liked a normal amount. and then i shrugged and never watched it bc they didn't look the way they had looked in my head and i had a Very Serious Issue w that apparently. then last year i got covid and i was really bored and i didn't know what to watch and i came across that one show tumblr was losing their minds about for some reason, so i went ugh fine i'll watch it. and then i relived the worst heartbreak of my whole life through a much more brutal dramatization and i was left in pieces, clutching my chest, crying on the floor, begging the universe for mercy. so naturally, like a very normal person, i went, "damn i need to watch this whole thing again 10 thousand more times until i memorize the dialogue word for word" and came on tumblr to scream into the void about it. and so here i am, continuing the lovely tradition of breaking hearts with unhinged poems and occasionally making memes friends will later find reposted on pinterest and instagram 🤡

10. What traits do you share with Crowley?

Yes well first the dumbassery and the unfortunate habit of shooting myself in the foot, le dépression, constantly in alert mode, cant for the life of me ever sit like a normal person, sunglasses out in public always bc my vampire ass is allergic to light, clothing only exists in black, antes muerto que sencillo ✨ (sooner dead than a simple hoe) flash bastard, blasting Queen, horrible plant dad, former raging alcoholic, Aziraphalesexual, drama queen, in fucking pieces 🪦

22. Bildad The Shuhite: hot or not?

look i can see the appeal, but personally i wouldn't fuck him

24. Who would you choose to run off to Centauri with?

you guys keep asking me this as if i even know other people lmao anyway. my answer is still: a copy of The Awakening by Kate Chopin. iykyk 🖤 if not and you wish to find out, get tissues

thanks for the asksss! this was fun to write lmao

[koishua]

i most DEFINITELY need hatsune song recs

YOU'VE COME TO THE CORRECT WEEB

fav miku songs:

world is mine: my intro to miku and the world of vocaloids it was... SOMETHING ahahaha i adore it to bits it's so so sassy and unhinged (like all vocaloid song lol)

cendrillon: duet with kaito and it's so pretty and melancholic and dark i am obsessed also there's a miraculous ladybug amv of it it's insanely good with the vocalist covering it oh my GOD

cantarella: also with kaito!! same-ish vibes with cendrillon very royalty but this one is more like passionate romance i also love love love it ugh

popipo: for the most insane hilariously good vibes pls watch the video for it too you'll cry laughing it's so ridiculously adorable and just insane

senbonzakura: so so catchy i also adore the video for it with all of the cameos from the others' they're adorable but also this song has so many political undernotes lmao

look this way, baby: INSANEEEE so sassy so so sassy i know it WORD by WORD i strut and flick my hair to this in the middle of the night on full blast it makes me feel so happy i can't explain it

online game addicts sprechchor: it's so adorable it's about being addicted to gaming 🤭🤭 i adore the graphics too i had screenshots of the video as my laptop screensaver for so long

tell your world: this!! this i cry every time i listen to it it's just so so hopeful and positive and sweet the lyrics make me tear up and the melody is so beautiful and the chorus will always make my heart feel lighter!!

cat food: world is mine was my first intro BUT!! this was the song i heard afterwards and spiraled afterwards oml i had this downloaded on my old tiny laptop and mind you this was 9 years ago i knew the words to this by heart and somehow still do 😭😭don't look at the lyrics. don't look at most of project diva arcade's lyrics lmfaooo

decorator: THIS TOO!! this one came out after i got into vocaloid and it's so festive and the main lot are included and they're all so adorable and the lyrics are so so wholesome and nice and this one fills my heart with so much warmth and joy i also know this one by heart!! i also learned the choreo ahahahah and performed it to the wall of my room ugh it's just so upbeat and happy i have a very special connection to this one

odds&ends: the lyrics for this one kills :( i sometimes feel so overwhelmed with how heartbreaking the lyrics are but miku saying you should my voice and that you can use her if you can't do it yourself gave me so much courage ;-; her saying she'll be the voice you can't let out ;-;

others!:

echo by gumi: this one is devastating and i used to relate to the lyrics so much back when i was dealing with the depths of my confusion and anger and loneliness ugh

copycat by gumi: actually you know what i generally adore vocacircus so you can check out their songs

meltdown by rin: a cult classic you just vibe to this you just have to it's one of the catchiest vocaloid songs imo i also was obsessed with this for a whole three years so the lyrics are in the bag.

electric angel by rin and len: MY GOD THIS ONE IS ONE OF THOSE TOO gets me so happy and just really my heart feels so full the lyrics are so cute and adorable and quirky it just makes me tear up from how much better i feel every time i listen to it

lie by luka: (also made by vocacircus im telling you!!) this one is heartbreak packed into a song. one sided love hurts, breakups hurt (apparently lol and i got to feel the extent of it thru this song) and the lyrics punch you with every word. some of my favourite heartbreak lyrics. ("and maybe one day i'll get to see your smile in the arms of someone who loves you like i do / i'll play along writing our song, we are perfect, i love you / why dont i cry for you? / why aren't you gone? / i know you're not that strong") and maybe they aren't the saddest thing you've heard and i know it isn't mine, but the production is so empty-feeling and you can feel the ache from every single instrument and sound in the track and the visuals tell a story and—

reboot with miku, luka, and zimi: this one wrecked me after my first watch and listen. it's about three friends who drift apart after a tragedy and just. the resentment and guilt shown there. and the ending just. it's such a melancholic song. the video makes me sob every time esp 3:25-3:35 if you decide to watch it!

teddy bear by rin: don't watch or listen to this is you're not okay mentally bc i wasn't when i came across it. many sad and disturbing ideations (like a ton of other vocaloid songs istg ppl create to vent) and trauma dumpings but the song is genuinely so good

[collegetennisoriginstory]

ALLIEEEEEEEE!!!!! Just finished the update HOLY SHIT!!!!!!

[Mandatory spoiler warning here]

OMG SAM!!!!!!! MY LIL BESTIE IS HERE AGAINNNN!!! AND WE MATCHIEESSS <3 SAM MY SCRUNKLYWUNKLY ❤️🩷 YOU BET UR ASS I CHOSE THE "NO THOUGHTS HEAD EMPTY, SOUL CRUSHING HUG" OPTION!!! AHH I AM WHOLE AGAIN, SAMMYWHAMMY, MY SAMWISE, MY LIL GUY!!

I love how sam is immediately adopted as part of the cheering squad 😂 Im just imagining diego and Addie going 'one of us!! One of us!!! One of us!!!' At sam and just merges em into the group like theyve always belonged there 😭 I knew sam and diego would be instant besties!! I love G and Sam too!! Though I guess I didnt flirt enough with G to trigger any sort of jealousy between G and Sam. But its fine, Ive found that G as a platonic friend is also very sweet and I honestly kinda prefer it for my MC!! (Who will cry themself stupid when G has to leave 😔)

Speaking of jealousy, I absolutely LOVE Rayyan being sooo jealous the whole chapter lmaooo like yes bby frown those beautiful eyebrows... oh, MC is wearing someone else's last name to their first season debut???? Ohh u are seething... who is MC seeing so badly that theyre holding up the game?? Who is MC waving at?? I cant wait to introduce Sam to the team 😊 hopefully they would be able to go home unscathed <3

ALSO the tension after the match with Rayyan!!!! UGH I WANNA LIVE IN THAT SCENE FOREVER GOD ITS SO---- The restraint, the longing, the 'i want them so bad but causing a scandal by making out sloppy toppy at ur first match is probably NOT GOOD, but im this 🤏 close to risking it all'...

It's so woefully inadequate, so woefully incongruent with the way he's looking at you, that you're a whisker away from growling in frustration and stepping in to kiss him in front of the entire Cargill crowd.

THIS IS MY FAVORITE LINE OMG!!!! AND THE WAY RAYYAN JUST GRABS UR HAND AND HUGS U INSTEAD!!! I AM FERAL. LIKE ITS SO SO SO SOFT BUT ITS SUCH POOR SUBSTITUTE TO WHAT U ACTUALLY WANTED HUH RAYYAN??? ..... one of these days I might do a slowburn Rayyan route, but sadly Im a board certified thirsty hoe, so...

Btw I also chose the non heart hug option and ITS SO SOFT???? I LOVE THEM BEING SOFT??? LIKE "u only get to hug me once okay? 😤" "once per match?? 😊🥰🥺🤗" MC SO CUTE GOT RAYYAN GIGGLIN AND BEING MAD CUTE AND SHIT

AND OH DONT GET ME STARTED WITH 'THE LOCKER ROOM PART 3: ELECTRIC BOOGALOO' SCENE. I AM DEVOURING RAYYANS SOUL, I AM BITING DOWN, CHOMPING. THOSE LOCKERS HAVE SEEN SO MUCH SHIT I AM SO SORRY LOCKERS I LOVE U. I WILL NEVER GET TIRED OF LOCKER ROOM KISSES I HOPE IT GETS TO LOCKER ROOM PART 587

Anyways sorry about being unhinged at u, it is born out of love for ur incredible work, I hope the surgery goes well <3 rest up, sending u loads of love, Allie ❤️❤️

Hahahaha I LOVE your excitement omg this absolutely made my week!! Definitely read this one more than a couple times :)))

G is not really the jealous type, but there is a difference in their reaction to Sam and MC if MC has been flirting with G... though the more pronounced reaction comes from Sam if MC flirts with G in front of them.

As for Rayyan... yes. They definitely are the competitive type, both when it comes to tennis and. Well. Romance.

Glad you enjoyed some of the interactions between the ROs/characters in the update, it was a lot of fun getting to write some of these dynamics after building up to them in earlier chapters. A personal fave was writing Tobin's locker room scenes, and G/Rayyan being soft, and Sam's reunion :)

Finally, I have lots of Sam/hallmate interactions planned for the weekend, so stay tuned for that!!

Thanks so much again for the message and so glad you enjoyed the update!

[hannahlovesluca]

hey heyyy, if you dont feel like doing matchups atm feel free to ignore this BUT i've been a lil tempted...

(i'd prefer a guy but a lady is fine too!)

my name is basil

my pronouns are she/they :3

sexuality: bisexual w/ a preference for men

i'm a sagittarius!

im an isfp-t (according to the test im 99% introverted-)

my oshis are: luca kaneshiro, kyo kaneko and maria marionette

appearance: VERY PALE...it's kinda concerning. i have like shoulder length messy brown hair, green eyes (with VERY VISIBLE eyebags) and somewhere inbetween thick and thin.

personality: i'm rlly quiet and socially anxious in public but online? i'm probably the most unhinged person you'll ever meet. i have like zero filter and i rarely ever think before i speak. my friends say im super empathetic and nice but im also a tad bit silly... i apologize wayyy too much and i'll admit, i'm a bit of a horndog and i am decently flirty (even tho my rizz game is like -100). i also get distracted veryyy easily and i procrastinate a lot.

i rlly like cats, salty foods, calm video games, art (even tho i suck at it), my friends <3, writing, candles, anime, sleeping and vocaloid songs

i HATE flashing / bright lights, bugs and spiders, loud noises, the dark, super quiet places and social gatherings

love language (giving): PHYSICAL TOUCH 100%. i loove hugging people and just touching people in general! (that sounded rlly weird). runner ups are acts of service and words of affirmation!

love language (receiving): basically the same as giving! i adore physical touch so much, it makes me feel rlly happy :3. runner ups are quality time and words of affirmation.

extra: im EXTREMELY PICKY with food. like i barely eat throughout the day and i assume that if theres a food i havent tried, i won't like it. i also suck at cooking (aka ive never cooked anything so therefore i suck). uhhh i have a russian blue kitten named shio as well as three other cats and two dogs!!

thats it i think!

GET BETTER SOON HANNAH!!!

i pair you with…

Mysta Rias!

hear me out…

• oh my god you are actually the exact same person

• extremely introverted in public and unhinged as hell behind closed doors

• also hes said before he likes short hair on a girl so 🙈🙈

• and again, like a previous mysta matchup; neither of you can cook.

• which leads to a lot of dates whether that be in a restaurant or ordered from door dash (thats the company right? ours in sweden is called Wolt LMAOO)

• also thank you for hoping i get better i am fully recovered

• mysta adores physical touch so knowing thats your love language is amazing for him hes so infatuated jejdksjsowudbdkwo

• and VOCALOID!!! he loves vocaloid and rhythm games

• IF YOU LOVE RHYTHM GAMES HE WILL ACTUALLY DIE OF HAPPINESS

• also isfp and infj (him) go really well together imo and its just so :))

• ugh him, luca, ike, selen and pogmu… i could go on forever about them

• messages you’ll receive:

• “KISS ME BITCH” “why couldnt you just ask in person?”

• “where the fuck did all my socks go”

[rubyreduji]

Talk about your moots; what do you like most about them (could be a paragraph or a single sentence, spread the love!!)

IM FINALLY GETTING AROUDN TO DOING THIS OKAY FDSJAKL

its too long so it's under the cut :') i just have to much love ig

MIKA (@toruro)

my mika...ah...what do i even say about her. tbh i shouldn't say anything because if i talk about why i love mika then you guys will fall in love with her too but she's MINE. jk the real reason is bc if i talked abt how much i love her i will write a whole essay BUT here are few reasons why i love mika: we just click, like i can't even remember how we went from like having one conversation to suddenly talking all the time but i would not have it any other way i love listening to mika's 30 minute voice messages and like she just supports me so much not even in a writing aspect like i can just talk abt my problems and mika will be there for me. she's also SO TALENTED??? like i will always hold her to the highest praise bc she is perfect and amazing in my eyes forever ☆☆ things that remind me of mika: coffee dates, flower fields, pretty trinkets in antique shops

BRIE (@leejihoonownsmyheart)

one of the first moots i ever made and tbh the most important one, she was the only person on this site i talked to for like months and she basically held my hand through the first few months of this blog as i figured out what the fuck i was doing and she has never been anything other than supportive. brie literally is so nice to anyone she interacts with and she just has such a sweet presence, like i love whenever we talk even if it just for a few mintues like brie really is my big sister and i will forever be greatful for her xx ☆☆ things that remind me of brie: friendship bracelets, ice cream on a hot day, blurry candid photos

SAR (@cheolhub)

me and sar's interactions are super sporadic but always so funny and i love how unhinged sar can be like she will be feral over her men and i support that like we don't talk that that much (talk to me more sar djkfsal) but like i know that it will always be such a good time ☆☆ things that remind of me sar: stars (obvi), cool sunglasses, fun wall posters

SAVV (@savventeen)

I LOVE SAVV OH MY GOD i just love talking to him like the vibes are always so chill and like he lets me bounce ideas off of them and it's so nice because i have no clue what i'm doing every and also just his fics are like a giant warm hug and so is his personality ☆☆ things that remind me of savv: pillow forts, running a successful show (theatre kids unite), board game night with your best friends

ELV (@userelv)

I DON'T THINK YOU UNDERSTAND LIKE FDJKLDSLA elv is a caratblr legend in my mind like literally friends with everyone, writes the most insane amazing fics, and super unproblematic like i am blessed to be moots with her. i just love seeing her on my feed or in my activity it makes me all giddy and happy AND she tags me in snoopy content >>> taking her out on so many arbys dates fr ☆☆ things that remind me of elv: sunflowers, honey pots, fun photobooth photos

EM (@gyuswhore)

okay so em's whole energy is just the cutest thing every i can't explain it but like literally just makes me so happy whenever we interact like UGH WE SHOULK TALK MORE but also like i just feel like em is so funny i need more of her in my life and like her writing is just so feel good to me i love it so much (also soooo talented at drawing like wtf dfjklsa im obsessed) ☆☆ things that remind me of em: golden hour, late night baking, homemade jewelry

KAI (@lovelyhan)

you guys kai is just so cute and sweet and like fjdsaklf first off their blog theme is always so cute and well put together i love it and their writing???? HOLY SHIT I ASCEND EVERYTIME I READ SMTH FROM THEM but also just in general kai is so sweet and nice to talk to and like you can see that in the way they interact with people on their blog and just how everyone loves them so much (as they should) like i would love to talk to kai more just bc like i want all the good vibes they bring ☆☆ things that remind me of kai: cute novelty stamps, doodles in the margin of your notes, linking pinkies

SALEM (@hoeforcheol)

RAHHH FDSJKLSA so brie is basically the reason why salem and i are moots and its insane because like SALEM IS SO SWEET AND SUPPORTIVE??? we haven't talked in a hot second tbh but like i fr feel like i could talk to them abt anything whenever and wouldn't feel like a bother like it's just a safe feeling around salem i love being moots with her and talking to her and just everything ☆☆ things that remind me of salem: screaming to ur fav song in the car, silly inside jokes, exploring a new city with your best friend

[ma1dita]

okok catching up on troubleverse WHEWW and i have the perffff song for them, paired with the lyrics verse-for-verse and me screaming shrilly LMAOOO.

but this song is sosososo perf, like everything abt it from the lyrics to the singer's erratically paced singing to the general unhinged vibes and. IT SHARES A NAME WITH THE ENTIRE SERIES TOO OMG-- 'partner in crime' by madilyn mei!! i haven't listened to my folk indie queen for a hot minute but i had to pull it out from the dusty archive of my skull for u 😗😗

When you're gone I feel alone again / The voices cannot hold my hand / They keep me company at very best / Distract me from my loneliness

insanity mention?? dionysus the god of mania?? HELLOOOO CAN THOU HEAR ME [rattling at the bars of containment]

Maybe I'm just an anomaly / Even my demons have their families / Truly something must be wrong with me / To need you as much as I do

smth must be wrong with trouble to need luke as much as she does and vice versa smth smth okay like. i think the whole thing abt him being trouble's ESA from buddy system is saying enough 😭😭

I was never meant to win / [... maniacal laughing] SHUT UP!

THE LAUGHING AND THE MUTED SHUT UP HERE JUST GETS ME. straight chills, ik it didnt happen but during love like a blister if trouble screamed at the other counselors out of rage and the campers heard it the way it sounded in the song UGH. I WAS NEVER MEANT TO WIN. THEY DON'T EVER WIN BC LUKE HAS BEEN DOOMED BY THE NARRATIVE OMFG.

Here's the reigns / Take ahold of me / Please don't let me go / You do the talking / Sew up my mouth if I can't keep it closed

BUDDY SYSTEM CODED when they're on the road trip bc the image just comes to mind instantly, like if they see questioning adults luke has to do the sweet talking bc trouble is lowkey a pro yapper and can't keep her mouth shut at all. AND 'here's the reigns take ahold of me' NO WORDS no words at all just vibes bc wdym. i just think that luke being vulnerable to trouble and talking abt his mom as if he were giving her the reigns to his personal life ermm.

Run for it / I'll keep em occupied for you / Cause I love you, I love you so

SOMEBODYS ANGEL SAVE ME SOMEBODYS ANGEL SAVE ME. trouble stepping into the battle with ladon to save luke, 'run for it i'll keep [LADON] occupied cause i love you i love so' I AM SICK. SOMEONE MAKE ME SOME CONGEE UGHHH.

I'm 'bout to die / Yet the only thing I find i'm worried about is you / Something tells me you aren't coming / Guess that I'm truly doomed

i saw ur synopsis of asking for trouble like. he's dying and the only thing he can think abt. is trouble??? r u kidding me? and then trouble supposedly pleading his case with the olympians in the as above so below synopsis DONT TELL ME that trouble is gonna be too late for luke and so he dies thinking that she still hates him (based off what im assuming from the when the curtains close synopsis, 'all strings r cut' WDYM??)

I overhear your brain when it's close to mine / Oh, I know that we're not the same / My heart's on the line / I'm just a pawn in your game / Not your partner in crime

JO THEY R SUPPOSED TO BE PARTNERS IN CRIME HELLO. solipsism c'mere i just wanna talk bc drunk!trouble seeing luke from a different timeline and KNOWING HE'S REALLY THERE BUT IT ISNT HIM = 'i overhear your brain when it's close to mine / oh, i know that we're not the same' THEY ARE ON DIFFERENT WAVELENGTHS IN THE MOST LITERAL SENSE POSSIBLE WITH TIME in this essay i will--

You're slowly killing me / Taking your- (I was never meant to win)

luke to kronos, the titan is slowing killing him from the inside out the longer he's possessing luke. HE WAS NEVER MEANT TO WIN UGH. i need to put maddie and u in affectionate jail bc ASDFGHJKL goodbye i am finished. troubleverse is sososoo evil, like this is srsly what everyone else feels when they read jubi bc if it is i am so sorry for everything.

to conclude jo, ily but i also am gobsmacked with my mouth hanging wide open and catching flies bc this whole thing is unbe-fucking-lieveable. the way u built their whole ass relationship from the ground up and swung a baseball bat into it like ok i need to take a business month to process this for reasons known and unknown, my bags r packed up at the airport, who cares abt my chem grade, it is sabbatical time WHEWW

THEOOOOO IM SCREAMING UNTIL MY HEAD EXPLODES THE SONG REC IS SO GOOD??? how tf did i miss that

i am so happy that you made the troubleverse part of your day it is an honor to have you connect the dots from your perspective and see how everything is playing out!! you in my brain ill make you congee BAHAH you've been the only one to put some of the dots together for the final arc (or at least voice it, thank you for being brave) and i will neither confirm nor deny but your analysis is pretty spot on for someone who binge read it today thank you so much!!

study for chem no rest for the weak >:( love youu

[lorelune]

im too shy to come off anon atm but tysm for the 2nd part after scrap metal. i quite literally screamed (internally, since i was with someone when i saw it) and after reading it, im well fed but just as starved for more OTL

idek where to begin w my thoughts, ugh, you write blade so well. SO WELL. like maybe ppl can write unhinged characters fine, but you. YOU. are so different with that. ill probably find the words in the future to describe what im feeling about this series(??bc it technically can be standalone) but all i can say is that im with the mind to print your writing out and eat it. like, chew it with my molars and swallow it, and then print another one to eat some more, maybe put some slices on my next meal LOLLL. idk, i want to consume it and have it in my veins.

i for real cannot come up with the words to describe this,,,,but i promise im not crazy !! (debatable tbh) i just really like WORDS and WRITING and this just made me just as insane as blade's probably feeling. it's beyond just being giddy bc one of my fav authors wrote for one of my fav charas and it happened to be a reader insert -- there is a fundamental nutrient being provided by your writing and it could have been for any fandom/show, and i probably wouldve had a similar reaction.

your writing has always been wonderful and captivating, but there is smth about the way you wrote blade's pov (brOTHER there is so much ART in the way consciousness was expressed, im frothing at the mouth--) in this and scrap metal that i think really showcased how well you write. like i said, this piece could have been for any other fandom (and i'd still read it bc you wrote it <3) and i know it wouldve hit me like a truck all the same.

this got super long bc it's late where i am but i really wanted to let you know how much i appreciate your work and the talent you have with writing, and this blade series made it so that i couldnt keep these thoughts to myself !!

ik this is only my 2nd ask but since idk when ill come off anon (bc im shyyy) i hope you dont mind me calling myself "slightly feral anon" LOLL (or if you have a better name it's up to you!!)

anon anon ANON (slightly feral anon = sfa anon FOR SHORT!!) thank you for the ask!!! and for reading and enjoying scrap metal and braised!!! 💕✨!!!! i am glad i could provide some fundamental nutrient rich chewable good brain feeling writing 🫡💓

TRULLLY blades pov is fascinating. it's what inspired me to write scrap metal to begin with!! i was thinking abt blade pov in present day game timeline and was like "damn he'd be fucking crazy :3c". i had such immediate brain worms and had to play around with it!!! the whole idea really grabbed me!! the prose hit too so hard like. this guy is not gonna think or feel in a way that is linear and its been SO indulgent and fun to write!!!

not to mention :3c i am excited to write more of these dynamics :3ccccc miss kafka does thing to me on a soul deep level and the relationship between her and blade and her and reader is so twisted and wretched and its so sexy of her. i'm excited for more of the yan olympics

SFA ANON!! thank you for this ask it has brought me much joy 🙏!! thank you once again for the kindness and for reading and sharing your thoughts, your feedback is very appreciated!!!!

[emmiri-bumble]

since my online origin is actually tumblr i feel a bit more open with like.. being unhinged about Dotty and her DN rewrite timeline and endorsing the fact that Naomi/Noddy, L's daughter, and Natsuki/Nat, Light's daughter, are absolutely some of my all time favorite characters that ive written (largely based on funnee family videos)

(please accept the crungled quality im working with scraps) And if youre not familiar with my DN rewritten; In short the synopsis is "What if L always had a friend from the start?", " What if people were allowed to be lgbt+?", and "What if i spat in the face of the god of all death itself?"

Anyways Dot has a kid with L and Light. Thats how it be. Here's a bunch of the greatest hits of Nat and Noddy

~ Someone's filming L L knocks on Naomi's bedroom door Baby Naomi opens it Naomi: ba? L: hello miss I'm selling girl guide cookies, are you interested in buying a box? They're £2.75 each. Naomi: uuuh- L: I have all the kinds. Thin mints… Shortbreads… Samoas Naomi: no no bah bah L: ok thank you byyye -Naomi closes the door- Mello, loudly, inside that room: Naomi did you seriously just send that poor scout away without buying me nothin??? L starts giggling quietly so hard that he has to brace himself against the wall. Mello, play yelling: WHAT THE FUCK, DUDE??? Naomi: BABABABAGHAA!!!!!!!! L practically collapses ~ L gently feeding months old Naomi her first lemon slice while out to dinner. Naomi: gbbh. She sucks on it. Naomi: buh…gaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! L: yeah it's bad without sugar, isn't it?

L feeds months old Nat her first lemon slice while out at dinner. Nat: ubbu? Nat suckles on it longer than Noddy and L takes it away. Nat: eeehehehe!! She leans in for more. L: weird. Light: ….weird.

~

Naomi: What game you playin, Lollie? Ollie, too focused: hm? Near: he's playing "paying the bills" Naomi: is he winning? Ollie: no.

~ BB: don't you want to get a job someday? Naomi: no because i don't want to be sad.

~ Mello: have fun at school! Naomi: that's not how school works.

~ Naomi: Beebee tell me which hand has a sock in it!!!! B looks and sees Naomi holding out two hands, palm up. With one hand that's clearly clenched around a sock. B: you're the child of the smartest people i know. Naomi: i know that thank you! B: and you're stupid if you think I'm fooled. Naomi: don't… Don't be naughty :' 0

~ Isaiah: what do you have there? Naomi: butter knife. Isaiah: for…what? You're not cooking. I am. Ollie: we are. Naomi: for..buttering things. Ollie: in your bedroom? Naomi backs away quickly Isaiah: .. there better be butter in that fridge. ~

Naomi: YALL ARE A NIGHTMARE!!!!!! Naomi runs up the stairs on all fours to go sulk in her room

B: SHES RIGHT. IM GONNA GO COMFORT THE BUGBEAR!!! B storms up after her in much the same way ~

Matt: okay kids! Sandwich dinner time! Naomi: i did TOO MUCH homework to be getting LOUSY SAMMIES for dinners!! Nat: YAH. Matt: OH~ SORRY IM NOT UNCLE OLLIE~!! ~

Nats at a play place in a childrens museum trying to draw at a station. One little insufferable boy keeps tugging her paper. Over and over. Nat keeps yelling at him to stop. Light and Dot are both there intensely watching her. His parents are nowhere to be seen. Maybe. Nat: stoop!!! Boy: ~stooop~ Nat: i mean it dude!! Boy: i don't care, your drawing sucks. Nat: ugh- She throws down her pencil and stands up. Nat: OH IF YOU WANT TO TALK TO SOMEONE WHY DONT YOU JUST GO VISIT YOUR DAD PICKING UP TRASH ON THE SIDE OF THE HIGHWAY WITH THE OTHER INMATES!?? Dot: oop-! Too real!! She scuttles over to disarm her kid

~

Naomi: Daddy up!!!! L: ok, nugget. He picks her up into his chair Naomi: I'm gonna be mommy now. L: haha, fine by me. Naomi reaches for the computer and points at it Naomi: aw shit! She pulls over a stack of documents and pretends to look through them. Naomi: Aw mother fucker! Oh, L, you idiot! Neenee you bastard you bought- you- you did all the spending for the whole three years! God damn it!! L: ….we need to have a talk with mommy about swearing.

~

Jules: take this biscuit. She drops toddler Naomi off at Nears side. Naomi: nee nee. Jules: she developed a new hobby and i don't admire that shit in my kitchen. Near: what….did she do? Jules: she took a bite out of every piece of produce on the counter. Every. Single. One.

~ Dot: baby, you have to slow down and breathe in and out. Nat: IIIIIIII DONTTT WAAAAAAANNNAAAAAA Near: I'll breathe with you, let's follow mommy. Dot: ok breathe in. Deeep. They both breath in. Dot: breathe outtttttt. They both breathe out. They do this a few more times. Naomi in another room: NAAAASUGII! Nat stops breathing Nat: HOL ON IM BREATHING HERE!! Nat goes back to her deep breathing Near starts giggling, ruining it.

~ Video of Mello pointing at a smudge on the wall. Interrogating Naomi. Mello: what is it? Naomi: ….. knowledge. Mello: knowledge?? Naomi: yeah cause i squished the bug. Mello: and all his knowledge came out? Naomi: it's sad. Mello: it is. Mello: stop slamming bugs on the wall.

~ Shows baby Naomi a picture of Mello Dot: who's that?? Naomi starts smiling and giggling uncontrollably. Dot: who is it?? Naomi screams in delight. Mello, in the distance: I've never felt more validated in my life. L: every day my approval becomes more and more like chopped liver to him.

~ Video of Mello standing in the doorway, 8 month old Naomi is outside and soaking wet, its been raining. Naomi, with gusto: ghgbgbyeeey byteeebyeeee ghggugugus ddaddbaba!!! Mello: I dont think so Naomi Gage, get in here. Naomi, more angry, arguing even harder: gagabgaasusbufusubuuuru!!!!! Mello: No means no, young lady, youre coming in before you catch your death. Naomi: NAANANANA lebeebesbsbe guggugddaaa!!!!! L, behind the camera: try this -he holds out his hand, theres a snickerdoodle cookie in it- L: Nooooddy, come inside and share a biscuit with daddy. Naomi, nodding: ba. -naomi walks in, ignoring mello-

~ Video of Naomi (1 ish) picking up her toys and aggressively explaining them to Near Naomi: gughghgd babaaab gagaaaa huhuhbuuububu bbb!! Near: ….okay.. -Naomi tosses that one down and picks up another- Naomi: BABABABABABABA aababagsgugugu gugugugugbebemmmmmmmba! Near: ………………. Dot, filming: oh lord we gon' have our hands real full… -Dot holds up the positive pregnancy test that no ones seen yet- Naomi: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAABABABABAB GUGUGUGUGUGSSSSAAAAAAAAA Near: I get it, Naomi. i get it -Naomi takes a step closer and shakes the train in her hand- Naomi: AAABABA bublblblblblbblblblbblblbllll!!!!! Naomi: MAMAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Dot: wha? Naomi: AAABABABABABABABABAB! She's waving the train Dot: yeah it is! Naomi: ( : !

~ Video of Baby Nat proudly sitting on top of an overturned plastic tub. muffled sounds in tub B: Natsuki Nat: ba? B: get off the tub. Nat: waaaa?? B: whats in the tub? Naomi, muffled: Get off, Stinksuki!! Nat: uhh gggbhbg. B: is that your big sister? Nat: noh. B: well get off the tub and let me see. Naomi: Im loosing air you big jerk! -Nat crawls off the tub and Naomi immediately bursts out- Naomi, 3: She twied to Kill ME!!! B: eh it runs in the family

~ Nat, 5 months. Sitting in Matt's lap. Matt, pointing: are you gonna smile at NeeNee? Matt: is she smiling? Near: yes she is. Hello Natsuki. Nat: Baaa!! Matt, pointing again: smile at Uncle B? B gives her a crazy grin back. Matt points once more: smile at papa? Nat wriggles. Light: what? No smile for your father? Nat: bbbbb noh. Everyone: HER FIRST WORD!!! ~

video of Nat, 3, outside and holding a stick Nat: is this a bug? Dot: no. Its a stick. Nat: hm. Dot: its a stick bug!! -nat drops the stick like mid sentence- Nat: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

~

Video of Natsuki's first steps -She takes two shaky steps towards Ryuk and then falls and starts crying.- Ryuk: that didnt hurt, i know that didnt. stop crying. Ollie: shes crying because shes upset that she couldnt walk up to you on her own. Ryuk: :0 Ryuk: oh, it's ok Natsuki. -Ryuk picks her up and slings her over his shoulder like she likes- Nat: bbbbbbbbbrrrrr Ryuk: she weirds me out sometimes… Ollie: humans are weird. Jules, filming this: fuck we cant show Grandma Yagami this one. Light: NO I NEED A VIDEO TO SHOW MOM AND SAYU, WE HAVE TO STAGE A NEW ONE

~

Dot: Yeah. they came out of me She points at her kids Naomi: I WAS IN HER POCKET

~

Natsuki, 3, in the car. Nat: I will get a biscuit. Wight. Now. This. Minnite. Ollie: how about you ask for one. Nat: a. Biscuit. Now. Ollie: no, you gotta ask and say please too. Nat: I can get a biscuit, peas. Nat, quieter: wight now.

~

- A series of short videos consisting of Naomi and Natsuki throwing a slice of cheese on an unsuspecting family member

Eventually Jules joins their fun with them. She was never cheesed.

Starts with them throwing a slice on a quietly snoring Light. Hes spooked awake and stares at them with rage.

Cuts to them throwing one on Near from behind. He dosent react, he just picks the slice out of his hair and starts pulling off pieces to pop in his mouth.

Cuts to them throwing the slice on Dot as she walks into the room. Dot: -SHRIEK- Dot: oh hey, is this muenster? score.

Cuts to them throwing a slice on Mello, slapping it right over his scar. Mello flinches, looks at the girls (Now featuring Jules!) and deadpan goes Mello: am i pretty now?

Cuts to them throwing a slice onto L from behind but they miss his head and slam his back audibly L: -Shrieks and jumps- Light, barreling for them: WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT THROWING CHEESE AND SURPRISE ATTACKING YOUR FATHER!? The gals: -Shrieks- L, softly in the background: oh, cheese.

Cuts to video of them walking up to Matt as he gets out of his car and slapping the cheese over his goggles Matt: -shrieks- Matt: oh hey, muenster. Score.

Cuts to them throwing a slice on Ollie while hes standing at the kitchen counter distracted. He effortlessly slaps the cheese away before it even hits him. Girls: HOW?

Cuts to them throwing a slice on an unsuspecting B who immediately turns around and SLAMS it back onto Naomi's face.

~

Nat, 5 ish. Sliding down a slide on a wet autumn day Nat dismounts Nat: woh. Light: what is it? Nat: my bum jus got all wet. Nat stands and stares a little awkwardly, reaches back and wipes leaves off her butt, and then skitters off Dot: …………… Light: ………………. Dot, whispering aggressively: the ultimate fusion of meee and youuuuuuuu

~

Ollie takes a pic of the fam sitting on the couch after taking Nat home from the hospital. Naomi in L's lap. L clearly with red all around his eyes from crying. Nat is swaddled in Light's arms. Dot in the middle pointing at both kids. Ollie: saaay uhhh. Near behind him: death of the american dream. Ollie: no, say siblinghood Them: Siblinghood! Naomi: Iiiblin!!

~

Video of Near holding baby Nat in the garage. Nats screaming with delight while Mello repeatedly revs his motorcycle's engine. Near: this is hell on my ears but it's doing wonders for my heart. Nat: AAAAA! AAAHAHAHEHEHEHEHE!!!

~

Naomi, 10: UNCLE NEE LOOK AT THIS SHIRT WE FOUND AT THE MALL Near shuffles up to read the girls matching shirts It says "love is always near" Near: i- may cry a little. Nat, 8: do it.

~

Naomi, 1 ish and sitting on the counter in the kitchen Mr. W: are you filming? L: yeah. Mr. W: hands out, please Mr. W pops a raspberry on a finger. and proceeds to do that with all the rest on that hand Mr. W: and there is, what my Nan used to call, "The bum handimans fingers" -Naomi opens wide and pops one in her mouth- L: that sounds unsavory Mr.W: i never said my Nan was a refined lady.

~

Near: hello Odette, would you like to see why I don't like being in charge of the kids? -Dot turns around- Dot: huh? Near, in a tee-shirt, holding up his pj shirt to show Dot the damage. Dot: ah. Near: your's and L's crotch dumpling intentionally, and quite gently may I add- Dot: got spaghetti on you… Near, gritting teeth: -pushed the bowl against my back while I was turned away Dot: you didn't try to watch her do her spaghetti slurpini. That's why she did that.

~

-distant sound of a recorder playing "Hot Crossed Buns"- Dot: ohh Noddy youre practicing and i didnt even have to ask! Naomi turns around to reveal shes playing it through her nostril Dot: why can't you do anything normal? Naomi: Because im your daughter, BAyBEE! Dot: i can respect that Naomi goes back to playing via nose

~

Mello taking a selfie video while laying down. 3 year old Naomi is lightly tracing his burn scars with her finger. Mello, to the camera: hey Nods, I thought we were napping. Naomi, sleepily: I gotta touch the bumps. Mello: you gotta touch the bumps? Why? Naomi: cos I love them. Mello somewhat starts cracking up and tearing up at the same time and he frantically ends the video there

~

Mello: i can count on one hand how many times ive cried. Matt: no you cant Mello: every time was for either my momma or for L Matt: bullshit Mello: i, however, have absolutely lost count of the amount of times Naomi has made me cry this week Naomi: is ok lello is okaaay!! Mello: you want up? Naomi: is ok lello i make it bettur -Mello picks her up- Naomi: you gonna b okay, misturr Mello, tearing up: ah here i go again

~

PawPaw with a giant wad of bills in one hand and Baby Naomi resting in the nook of the other. He hands the money to Naomi. Isaiah: here's your allowance. Dot: Professor Dad, She's one. Isaiah: yeah? And she's my granddaughter. Isaiah: Here's your allowance, baby

~

Mello: oh no why's Nat crying today? Naomi, trudging out of Wammys with a weepy Nat in tow Nat: MY NuH NoH AAAAADDAAA Naomi: hhhh her substitute teacher kept hearing everyone call her Nat and she kept calling her "Natalie" all day long Mello: ohhhh. Hey Nat, Nat: HUUUWAaaa muh muhh meeewwooooo -Mello crouches down and picks the poor little thing up- Mello: all my teachers kept on calling me "Michael" when i went here. Nat: aaaaahaaaa---mmmmmm Mello: isnt that silly? we have the same problem. Nat, calming down: hehe

~

Naomi to L: Papa wouldnt let me be you for halloween. L: oh no thats terrible. Naomi: Cause Nat wanted to be Kira. L: ohh…no thats terrible. Naomi: so.. can you be you and Papa be Kira for halloween, pleeeas? L: no. Naomi: bu- L: No. its my birthday. I will be a vampire again end of story.

~

1st time trick or treating with Naomi and newbie Nat Naomi in a grim reaper costume. Nats… in a sling and Ollies carrying her Neighbor: ohh hello! Are you here for candy little reaper? Naomi: uh. Trikkortreat! Neighbor: here you go little reaper. Naomi: thank you -naomi starts walking off- -Naomi turns right back around- Naomi: Hey- didju know um. Is my daddys birthday? Neighbor: Oh? well. Naomi: he- hes the vampire! Neighbor squinting at L who is meekly waving Neighbor: Happy birthday Mr. Vampire! L, barely audible to her: Thank you Madame! Beyond: ITS THEIR WEDDING ANNIVERSARY TOO!

~

Naomi: WAAAAAhaaha- SHE ATE MY CAKE. Mello: she ate your cake? i didnt get you two any cake out of the fridge. Naomi: Sh- SHE ATE -cough- MY IMAGINARY CAKE N CAUS I-T ITS MY PLAY BIRTHDAY WAAAAA SHE ATE ALL IT Mello: hhhh… Mello walks into Nat hiding in another room Mello: Nat, did you eat Noddy's cake Nat: no i dinnit is in ma haand. Mello: the imaginary cake is still in your hand? Naomi: SHE. ATE. IT. ALL. Mello: ok go give it back to Nods, shes very sad you took it. Nat: is.. ok. iss imma hand see? Mello: yes i see it, lets go back and make things right. Nat: Okie lello, Noddie is ok is in mah hand still i got cake for you!

~

Baby naomi in her walker toddles into the kitchen while Ollie's cooking. Naomi: Guh. Near, on the counter doing jack shit: Guh! Naomi: nn guh. guh guh bububububuh bbbbb Naomi walks out like they just had a good talk Near: she has things to do, Ollie. So cook faster.

~

Naomi, barely able to talk: daddy birdy ..-inaudible- oh heeahd signs for poop and head Dot: a bird pooped on dads head on your walk? namoi nods solemly Dot: oh thats terrible im so sorry for daddy. Dot pans camera over to L, hanging up his coat and shaking his head, clearly no bird poo on him Dot: oh no thats terrible, daddy. im sorry.

~

Ollie: you can't make Nat open your present, Nods! Naomi: yes I can! Ollie: Nooo! Just because it's not Natsuki's Christmas gifts it doesn't mean you won't get in trouble for using Nat to ruin your surprise! Naomi: yeah buh daddy said- daddy.. he said if I open my present early it turns to underwear. Ollie: oh he did? Naomi: so.. so if you open yours it's not a toy anymore but if .. if uhh if you get your sister to open it it won't turn to nothing cause sh- cause Natsuki isn't me so the gift stays a good one! Ollie: so you think you found a loophole? Naomi: yes. Ollie: fair enough. Go tell your Dad, he'll be so pissed that he didn't see that.

~

Dot: when you give a mouse a cookie… Naomi: he chokes on it and dies. She shoves the toy she was chewing on back in her mouth

~

Nat sitting on Ollie's lap as usual Light: ok Nat, tell me again for the camera.. why do you think youre growing body hair? Nat: cos… i give Ollie too many hugs. Nat flops her body down onto Ollie in a big hug. Ollie: 🥺 💕

~

And my all time favorite:

Mello: look, look, Nat there's a lady bug on the walkway. Nat: a ladeebog? Nat toddles up and stomps on it several times Nat: buh byeee. Near: buh bye bug. Mello: tch- you're surely your dad's daughter.

~

And uh. wow you read all this? thenks

[mushroom-winners-proof]

im always gon be just the smallest bit dodgy about richard epcar as ansem i cant change the fact billy zane graced my eardrums but bro as terranort???? yeah no that’s absolutely perfect i’m glad we got that

[coveredinsweetpea]

My headcanon for Eddie Munson is that he is 1) a virgin (no shame in that!!) or at least inexperienced since everyone considers him a freak and 2) that he would be shy and embarrassed about it but very eager to please his significant other😍 Im so in love with him it’s crazy 🔥

Ugh this is so adorable!!! BUT I THINK IM 50/50 ON THIS!!!

On one hand, I do think he has quite a bit of experience. We know he's older, he looks like that - and fits into the 80s metalhead vibe so he's not that different, and he's unhinged, the man isn't shy (we've all seen him sweep Chrissy off her feet. The man's got game. Not the best game, but he's got it). Maybe he had a girlfriend once, at the beginning of high-school, things didn't work out and ever since then he just had a couple of meaningless hookups, but probably not with girls from the same high-school.

On the other hand, he's super chill about himself, doesn't think twice before saying whatever is on his mind, doesn't give a shit about what other people might think about him and basically just goes with the flow so I wouldn't be surprised if it just hasn't happened for him. But once he gets in a relationship, he'll be the the definition of praise kink. He'll probably be too shy at first to suggest stuff or he might even hold back a bit because he's afraid of doing something wrong, making you uncomfortable or hurting you. But once things get going, he will go crazy. He'll be SO dedicated to making you feel good, always asking you, making sure, wanting to hear you say it. "Is that good? Am I doing that ok?" and whenever he'd be eating you out, except for when his eyes will be rolled back in pleasure because your pussy is the best thing he ever put his mouth on, he'll always have his eyes on you, trying to read your expression and waiting for any kind of feedback (you pulling his hair is one of his favorite ways). And I totally see him stopping right before you finish, because he's clueless like that, just to ask how you're feeling. And he'll beg you to guide him through it!!! Ugh. This man.

Don't even get me started on giving Eddie his first blow job 😩😩

[effervescentdragon]

For shits n gigs, I’m playing that how many shots game but with myself, courtesy of the hillarious and amazing @chattahoochiecoochie tagging me :D okay, im deffs going full unhinged here, so, fuck it!

How many shots would it take you to fuck the drivers? I don’t drink anymore, but I’d need some shots for some of these.

Charles Leclerc: oh god none fuck it i’d do it stone cold sober idgaf

Carlos Sainz: six, at least

Lewis Hamilton: two in a row so as not to faint bcs he’s fucking transcendent

George Russell: ... four. it’s the accent and the proper britishness

Lando Norris: he gives off underage vibes i wouldnt touch him if he were the last person on earth, hard no

Daniel Ricciardo: i dreamt i fucked him in monaco so none baby full send

Kevin Magnussen: three, but of homemade 80% schnapz

Mick Schumacher: nope. too wholesome. id cuddle him, he’s baby, but just, no. 

Valtteri Bottas: we’d do a shot competition w that one finnish vodka and pass out. would probs fuck next day after the sauna cured the hangover

Zhou Guanyu: he cute. two-three, just for funsies

Esteban Ocon: ugh. just no.

Fernando Alonso: ... fuck me, like 10 jägermeister so i have something else to hate myslef about in the morning (i hate jäger and i hate myself for this)

Pierre Gasly: ugh. idk, i dont like him. he is hot, but i think he’d probably spend most of the fuck looking at himself in the mirror. 6 at least

Yuki Tsunoda: he is literally baby, no. refer to lando

Lance Stroll: hard no from me, he just creeps me out a bit w that smile

Sebastian Vettel: please don’t ask me this please i cant be normal about this, i cant be normal about vettel i just cant, just, i’d die if it came to that, i wouldn’t need alcohol, i’d need fucking cpr, it’s vettel-

Sergio Perez: no, sorry, just. hard pass.

Max Verstappen: ... refer to alonso

Alex Albon: nope, too wholesome, i literally dont get a single sexy vibe off him

Nicholas Latifi: i like his face too, and he looks fun in that nice guy way. we do two together, then we fuck

i tag @gruaigruaa bcs you’re bestie and i hate you bcs of alonso and also anyone who sees this and wants to go insane, go for it :)

[grimelven]

specifically inquisition leliana for the ask meme!

good, my favorite version of her🙏❤️ is that an unpopular opinion?? maybe, but listen here, i love unhinged inquisition leliana and in this essay I WILL EXPLAIN…okay, it’s really just a personal opinion of mine. i know a lot of fans were really disappointed to see that leliana was still hardened even after softened her in origins, but i mean?? it makes sense. origins was 10 years prior, a lot of things have happened since then and there’s a lot weighing on her conscience and i think she’s dealing with it in the best way she knows how…uh, killing, i guess? now, i do think a lot was retconned, which i’m not a fan of, but besides that, i think it’s interesting that you have an opportunity to soften her in both games. plus, if she’s softened and becomes the divine, her story feels like it comes full circle, y’know? so in that regard, i think her story gets wrapped up pretty nicely. ughhhh but i love her relationship with josie so much, im so glad we got to see it in inquisition. those two make me so happy, lemme tell you. and like, leliana is one of my favorite characters, so the fact that she came back as an advisor in inquisition really means a lot to me, even if she is different, but like i said, she’s been through a lot so i get it. UGH WAIT PRETEND I MARKED THAT THE DEVELOPERS DID HER DIRTY BUT UM WHY WAS THERE LIKE NO INTERACTIONS WITH MORRIGAN AND ALISTAIR- oh don’t even get me started on that, i will never stop taking about how upset about it, like they should have at least had one convo. apparently there was cut dialogue too, wtf bioware you guys really fumbled with that one. anyways, leliana and i go way back cause obviously i know her personally and i’ll defend her🤞🤞

[folktaylor]

didn't realize you watched yellowjackets! it's been a hyperfixation of mine for the past two months lmao. what are your thoughts on it?? how did you feel about the finale??

ugh yes when i was on winter break i binged all the episodes that were available it was SO GOOD

it’s as twisted and messed up and buried and traumatic as anything and i love that you never know if things are supernatural or if it’s the trauma of the situation that’s causing them all to go kind of mad because lbr in the 1996 timeline none of those girls can be considered a reliable narrator bc they’re starving and isolated and traumatized and you can see the remnants of everything leak through their lives in the present and the show shows it as like a dramatic descent in the current timeline esp for tai who has some kind of disassociate identity or fugue state thing happening and im so fascinated by it like her murder altar??? (rip biscuit) did “the bad one” make the sacrifice to win the election?? does she just revert to who she was in the woods because her fugue identity doesn’t realize she ever left?? I’m fascinated. and LOTTIE!!!! i knew there had to be other survivors but i was convinced Lottie was pit girl from the premiere so that shook me. and her emergence as antler queen? so well done because you have a group of girls who mostly have no hope and lottie has visions or is just off her meds and who knows which and her visions offer protection and hope and something that can be clung to esp for people like van who almost died but felt she was saved by the talisman.

and MISTY. listen i know objectively she’s a bad person but as a character i love her she’s unhinged. christina ricci is an icon. misty is def probably playing both sides and probably always has been since the woods because that girl has only ever wanted to feel needed so she’ll do whatever it takes to feel that way. i love her. chaotic. messy. terrible person excellent character.

as for the finale i thought it was great. it was a great set up for s2 because it kinda left you with more questions than answers but still tied up a few plot lines. you had a big death (Jackie) and a huge set up for the cult/clan shit that we got the preview for in the premiere. the murder of adam will probably be a thing in the second season. taissa’s dark side. lottie being alive and probably the leader of the group that just kidnapped nat. also i think it’s safe to assume travis didn’t actually kill himself so that’s tied to the group who took nat so there was A LOT of set up for s2 and i didn’t mind that. the show strikes me as the long game kind of show so i’m okay with not getting that many answers and more set up

ANYWAY long winded rant over thanks for coming to my ted talk

[dragqueenpentheus]

Okay no one has to read this but i DO have to write it:

PYROC VS FATHER PAUL

Ya bitch needs an art break bc im getting angry about voices existing as i try to keep myself entertained. Today is NOT a god one for sinking into repetitive line work and that’s just about all i have on the table atm

SO! Im gunna do a little thinking about my little meow meows all fucked up by religion. Just a comparison for my sanity and interests. Pyroc is my baby i wrote him for the first time years ago. Five?????????? Whadda hell. Going on six.

ANYWAY john joined religion because of his trauma. His sister died and he felt lost. He was unmoored in this fishing village and looking for reason looking for hope. Hed had his heart broken and trying to make sense of tragedy on his own was totally beyond him. Thats why his interactions with riley in AA are SO good like. He knows that confusion and he knows the rhetoric that’s supposed to combat it. Only it dooesnt work for riley.

The same sort of thing happens for pyrc, only inverted. Loss urns him away from god and religion because its SO strong in his family and not only is he loosing trust in god, but his kin as well. He’s suspicious there’s mre they arent telling him, at the point of his fathers death. And he agrees to, on the surface, absolutely wholly throw himself in to being the second the family and the village need. But he’s keeping his treachery under wraps.

That’s one of the coolest things about father paul imo is like. That slow unraveling of what is. Frankly. An awful half assed plan, driven by fear and loneliness and desperation and dementia and love. Even VERY obvious things like. Taking down the newspaper photo of his young self ‘slip’ by him. I think, on some level, its DEEPLY intentional. He wants people to CHOOSE this. He wants people like bev. He wants people who see him and are in aw of him beating god. Of killing death. He wants to be worshiped and adored and for people to come to him willingly, no tragedy driving them to his arms.

Pyroc also wnats to be worshipped, but he ALSO wants to do the worshipping. He really longs for an element of almost????? But not quite??? Subjection?? He wants to be shown something and for a Great Voice to tell him, unquestioningly and unerringly that it is GOOD. Full stop. And then he wants to spend his life worshipping it. But this booko is an exploration of how….. no such thing exists. And more importantly no great voice exists either. There is nothing wholly good, nothing wholy evil. His lack of faith in himself once he becomes god is him starting to understand that as well. Thats on purpose baked into the lore. The starting point was ‘what if god was a position and in order to get promoted you had to be a murderer. No matter what’. He understands things are not wholly good, at that point. I onder how long it will be for him to realize they are not fully evil as well?

Bc pruitt does hm hm hm an interesting move. Where he takes something the narritve is very sure to communicate is EVIL no wiggle room just fact. Even if its driven by animal instinct its. Evil. And he makes it, not just good, but HOLY. And god i LOVEEEE that for him i ADOREEE that what a MOVE. Driven by desperation and dementia and relief and ‘if god saved me than maybe i can be good despite loving and sinning and maybe if i defeat god then i will be Thee Good’. SO sexy of him. Im really fascinated by his morality. He seems to have an understanding of the shades of grey in some respects??? But if he had a BETTER one with more forgiveness in his heart i feel like hed have left the church anyway after sarah was born??? Even if millie didnt ask him??? That might just be my own sensibilities creeping in but ….. like he culd have seen her on the weekends. He can do other jobs. Hes straight (??? Not totally convinced of this) he could have just dated her that makes me crazy. LIKE OBV HE HAD LINES HE THOUGHT THAT WOULD CROSS AND HE HAD INTERNALIZED THE CHURCH AND THE RULES AND SHE WAS MARRIED AND ECT ECT i know he couldnt have really but. Thye were straight. They coulda.

Im not gunna do fantasy homophobia bc i think its …………….. Boring. But i think some element of??? The vindlegaurd line MUST be passed along and for that particular rules must be applied. But thats also boring as hell :/ maybe i can work in my parthenogenesis lore?????????? I bet pyroc would love building that spell in any universe. That’s the sequal when he goes to magic university in helsin. But yeah i do like the concept that. Anyone can have a baby thru magic its just a time and energy commitment. Just a matter of wanting it enough together. Every baby is so deeply wanted and its mere existence is proof. Thats dope i love that. HMMM to be decided at a later date when im deeper into the story i think. I still havent figured out fully how and where and why orion is going to be invovled and if???? Pyroc and orion are even going to be romantic??????? Im torn im TORn…….

Thikns about john bonding w sarah over science and learning and starts wEEPING…. Like theres some surity beloved. Its just a matter of uncovering. I think sarah felt that same thirst for answers and hunted them differently. Her faith is in logic and science. I loveeee her god. Every scene w her and her dad absolutely RUIN me like!!!!!! SHE DOESNT KNOW!!! SHE DOESNT KNOW HOW LOVED SHE IS!!!!!! I hope at hte very end she saw the blood as the gesture of love it SO clearly was and not him trying to poison her. God i love that she spat it out. GOD. Thats about being gay, btw. Spits the religious offering that could save you across the gasoline soaked church floor like BABE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think we as a collective should talk about the possibiites around sarah/erin more. Bc their defiance combined would be. Earth SHATTERING for crockett.

In the future pyroc gets a kid. Ever since that campaign where Enemy ended up playing his daughter im like. How did i NOT know this idiot wanted nothing more in the entire world than to travel it with his daughter. I dont care how or why hes getting a kid. Hed be so doting and awful abut it. He would need orion as a co-parent for the kids self esteem to be normal levels. thINKS ABOUT PAUL GETTING TO RAISE SARAH AND JUST ABSOLUTELY GASSING HER UPPPPPPPP HANGING EVERY DOODLE SHE EVER MADE ON TEH FRIDGE. BOASTING ABOUT HER SCEINECE PROJECT OT ANYONE WITHIN EYESIGHT EVEN THOUGH ‘WE K N O W JOHNWE WERE ALL AT THE SCEINCE FAIR’!!!!!!!!!!! Let these fuck ups be doting fathers im fucking begging. That scene where paul is like. You take ccare of everyone on the island sarah. Its more than being a doctor. You comfort them.

HM HM comfort is such a thing for Miss Bitch like!! He sees it as a Good Thing. He tries to bring it for riley by asking to hold the AA meetings on island ((also manipulation. Obvously also manipulation. I wouldnt have bene shocked if he was slipping the vampire blood into the coffee every meeting either. But thats just a theory. A game theory.)) ANYWAY he sees comfort as hly. The church gave it to him when he needed it. The angel gave it to him in the cave. Feeling safe and warm is HIGH on his list of priorities and what makes him hand over respect.

I think pyroc has lived a very comfortable life in SO many ways, but in none he. Activly recognizes. A key part of his character arc his him…. Opening his eyes to the world around them. Seeing the privilege he has and being like. Wait. This isnt Right. We have to change thi. And when no one agrees ti shifts to I have to change this. With Violence. A little revolutionary <3 it only costs the life of his whole ass family

Thats more fun comparison ground like…… paul is SO much about I know whats right and there is a cost but i AM ignoring it. Like HE KNOOOOWSSSS he knooooows he just doesnt want o See. I’m not sure if im going to surprise yroc with the ……megadeath of. His whole family. Or if it’s a choice he has to activly make. I think a choice makes it more compelling, more layerd. It has to be in the moment though, becaus ei think thats. A key difference between them. Pyroc wouldnt do it.. hed just leave hed peace out and do what he could in small ways. But he wouldnt do his big stand off with god. Hed shrink his goals in order to not hurt his family. Out of love?? Intimidation?? Some instinct wihtin him that balks at the idea of disobedience??? I think even he doesnt know. But i LOVE john becaue he jsut decides to lie. He closes his eyes and says i am being stupid on purpose. I think thats PERHAPS more compelling than good guy coward pyroc BUT!!!!! Thats who he is rip to ths little man. Cant change him now hes a whole ass child in my head. The PLOT i can change. Him….. not without massive character development <3

UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MM set my brain on FIRE!!!! Im so glad nano is coming up. I love sharpening pyroc against the comparison of other AMAZING characters. Father paul hill my beloved millstone <3 anyway sorry to anyone who reads this its literally me unhinging my jaw and emptying my brain out. I had to write stuff that wasn’t novel or fic. A little character time down and dirty. I wil NOT be editing this love and light to future me trying to decode this