#im just living and trying to bring joy to the world

[ancientgoddessofegypt]

JUNK MAIL PT.3

What You Need To Hear Right Now

PILE 1 - Gossip, Envy, Controlling, Vampires, Partying & Drinking.

Girl, you are way too pretty to be dealing with all that. Try following your dreams and worry less about the people chatting. That's all they'll ever do. Chattin'. They don't care what karma it leakes off or how you feel so worry less. Do something good for yourself and find a new hobby.

There are boys who want to treat you right, you just gotta figure out which one fits your needs better. Go to a party, grab a drink. Its your time.

PILE 2 - Living alone, Living for you, Depressive Memories, Resilience, Patients & Timing.

Babe, we gotta get outta that funk tonight! Don't let the past be the reason you sit back and forget who you are and where you come from. Divine timing is in your favor, surrender and be still. Painting is significant for this group, emotions need a new outlet. Journaling can help you figure out some past traumas, but over time you should enjoy the moment and see what you can do with that paint brush.

Let go. Allow your cries to be heard, suffering in isolation is not the answer for you boo. Get up!

PILE 3 - Honeymoon, New era, Crying for joy! Celebration, Remembrance.

Congratulations !! You've got it made in this new chapter. The work you've put in is coming forth to bring a new beginning that forces you to in a state of peace, divine gratitude and love. There could be someone new on the horizon, and its a sweet love. Im proud of you, if no one said it first than I'll be the one to do it.

This season is going to be good luck, lady bugs are significant for this group. Popularity, Having a great time, enjoying life. Yeah baby, thats all you.

PILE 4 - Get out of town. Vacation. Bus Ride. Take A Trip.. Now.

Oh boy, is everything alright ? Feeling clastrophobic? Same show different story? It's time to hit the road, love. Go to that beach, go get you a travel buddy.. Or go solo. You need this break. It'll be a stress relief for you. You need to give yourself a mental and emotional break, so you could have more time to conquer any challenges coming your way.

Take this time time to heal and put energy into the reality you wanna see more of babe. It's not the end of the world. Don't make it out to be.

For each and every group, this is your 'me' era. Focus on you girl, nobody needs to see yall sweat.

[raainberry]

Stickers

« silly series - 5 »

Momo x gn!reader

Fluff

synopsis - who knows how you ended up getting stickers glued on the face by a pretty girl but you don’t complain

wordcount - 570

A/N - writer’s block has hands y’all im ngl💀 but i do have a couple things drafted up🤭 (spy!yeji but you didnt hear it from me)

“Stop making that face.”

“What face?”

“You keep scrunching your cheeks everytime I put one on, it messes it all up.”

“Oh because it’s supposed to be structured?” You asked, feeling the mess on your face.

Several stickers, all pink and white following the Barbie color theme she loved so much. You thought they were pimple patches, and you were foolish enough to ask about them, believing her when she told you they were.

You trusted her, as one would their girlfriend, so you let her on your lap, her makeup half-done as she took a break to cover your two pimples that had popped out overnight.

You found out they were regular stickers about two minutes later, when she couldn’t contain her laughter anymore. By then it was too late to get her to stop, she’d tasted how fun it was.

Her giggles kept leaving the sweetest smile on her face. If it weren’t for it, you’d have whined her out of your lap far long ago.

She seemed happy. The way her eyes never failed to smile along with her lips, you swore it was the most beautiful sight this world had to offer. What an honor to be the cause behind it.

So long as it was harmless, you were okay with whatever could bring her joy. Even getting stickers on your face that would definitely make you break out more.

The things you’d do for that woman.

“Yes it is structured.” She said as she focused on another sticker. “I’m trying not to overbear your cheeks.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at the way her lips mindlessly parted. You’d think she was dealing with something with much higher stakes.

She was so effortlessly endearing. Was she even aware of how easily she could make you weak?

“Why not? That should be the point. It’s like blush, no?” You argued, making her chuckle.

“That’s ridiculous. No, it’s not.”

“Why not?”

“It’s just stickers.” She answered, focused on yet another one she applied to your chin this time.

“Are you gonna be done any time soon?” You wondered.

As much as you loved Momo, your muscles were starting to strain from trying to hold still for so long.

“I am actually. Do you want to see?” She grinned, reaching for the pocket mirror in your hand.

You nodded, smiling back at her before the sight was replaced with your own self.

“What do you think?” She asked, and you couldn’t help but laugh in response.

“Momo, why?”

“What?” She whined despite joining in on your laughter.

“Just—Why?”

“I don’t know, you asked and then I saw you looked pretty so I just continued. You told me I could!”

“Oh, so I’m not pretty without them? Do I have to live with these on my face forever? Look at me!”

“I am! You look nice, I wanna kiss your cheeks so bad, but it’s going to mess it all up.” She pouted, running her thumb over the stickers ever so gently.

“I’d rather kiss your lips anyway.” You shrugged.

“Just say cheese.” She rolled her eyes, grabbing her phone to capture the memory she’d just half-forced on you.

You simply laughed, following her orders as you looked into the camera. She took a few pictures, different angles catching the love you shared and gave each other so happily.

The two of you looked awfully wholesome in all of them. Looking at them, you were almost jealous of yourself before remembering you’re the one she loves.

What an honor. Hopefully you’ll stick around each other for a long, long while.

[tackytigerfic]

hi!!! im loving first watch of night SO MUCH!!!!! your world-building is incredible, and i LOVE the creation of spells!! i am so excited to dive deeper into the multiverse ahh!!

THANK YOU!!! this is so nice, i know i am a broken record about this but it took me so long to write and a fuckload of thought went into all that world-building lol. I said in one of my replies to a comment on the fic that I may not actually address every single thing that comes up in the fic in terms of the world-building or the magical theory, but even if I don't actively wrap it up or bring it to a conclusion, you can be damn sure that i thought about it and know what happened with it. i think i was just living in the world of the fic for so long that it makes sense to me, but the key was trying to translate that into it making sense for other people too 😅

This comment has brought me great joy, thank you so much for your kindness!

(First Watch)

[ravennaortiz]

Ok Sis.... My man Hap!!! 6,8,13,17,18,30,32 with angst with happy ending. Baby Happy on the way and he freaks out at first! He would be the bestest Daddy ever!!

Alright daddy happy( get ya mind out of the gutter lol) with angst and a happy ending? I believe I can whip up some magic for ya!

Prompts

6. Are you afraid of me?

8. Your drunk. No im not

13. I promise

17. I love you

18. Go slow

30. I need you

32. Your mine

Life

Happy stared down at the pregnancy test on the table for a moment before simply walking out of the house and riding off into the night. You laughed at yourself as tears streamed down your cheeks. How could you have been so stupid to have expected any other reaction from him? You two had not been together long and what more could you expect from an outlaw biker? Tossing the test away you locked up the house and made your way to your bedroom where you collapsed into a sobbing mess.

***

A month later you were stepping out of the bathroom after your shower when a figure rose from the bed in the dark. "Shh, just me" slurred Happy as you screamed and he turned the light on. Heart pounding you just stared at him thinking your mind was playing tricks on you. "What are you doing here?" you asked as you clutched the towel around you as tight as possible with your distended belly. "Are you afraid of me?" questioned Happy his eyes boring into you as he ignored your question.

"What?" you questioned as he put his hands in his head. "I don't want you to be afraid of me" he stated sadly as he kept his gaze on the ground. "I mean breaking in unannounced is a reasonable reason for me to have been frightened but I'm not afraid of you" you replied a bit of annoyance in your voice. Who was he to want to be comforted after running away? He stood up and made his way to you the smell of alcohol made your stomach churn as you put your arms out.

"Your drunk Hap" you stated as you gagged some. Happy stumbled back slightly. "No I'm not" he pouted as he frowned at you. "Are you okay?" he asked watching you run back to the bathroom and dry heave. "I'm sensitive to odors and you reek like a brewery to me" you replied. "I'm sorry. I can shower if that is okay?' replied Happy as fought the urge to pull you into his arms.

By the time Happy had showered you were sound asleep. Watching you sleep so peacefully he kicked himself for having missed out on so much time. He moved to his kutte and retrieved the tiny black box he had bought a week ago and put it on your nightstand. He then grabbed a pillow from the bed and made himself cozy on the floor. He hadn't yet earned the right to be in your bed like he hadn't fucked up majorly. Until you invited him back the floor was good enough for him.

***

You awoke the next morning to sunlight filtering through the blinds. You stretched as you sat up and shook your head when you saw Happy asleep on the floor. Looking to your nightstand to grab your phone to check the time your eyes caught on a small black box. Your heart pounded and your breath caught in your throat as you reached for it. Opening it tears well in your eyes as you found a simple silver band with a tiny heart shaped diamond set in it.

You hadn't realized you were crying until Happy spoke. "Was supposed to bring you joy not tears" he stated as he looked up at you. "Its beautiful" you murmured as you turned your eyes to him. I promise to never leave you and to always cherish you. I love you so much and I can't live in this world if your not in it or apart of my life" stated Happy as he moved to kneel at your feet with his hands on your thighs.

"I love you too Happy" you murmured as you caressed his cheek before trying to lean forward to kiss him. Your bump stopped you making you both laugh softly. "Here" murmured Happy as he moved to the bed and kissed you deeply as he pushed you back down on the bed. You moaned as he moved his mouth to the sensitive spot on your neck where he bit down before giving it a soothing lick. "Going to go slow with you baby girl. Show you how badly I need you and make sure you know you are mine forever" he whispered as he trailed his fingers down your sides as he carefully grinded against you.

***

"Mr. Lowman, would you like to hold your little girl?" asked the nurse as she held your beautiful tiny daughter in her arms. "I'm... a little nervous" replied Happy as he chuckled and held out shaky arms. "Your going to be fine. Just tuck her close, support her head" murmured the nurse as she helped him take her.

Want more Happy? Click here

Want to make your own request? Click here

[swifty-fox]

writing prompt request: buck/bucky or rosielemmons & domesticity - muse a rests chin on muse b’s shoulder to read/see what they’re holding

congrats on ur fic !! 💕 /solittles

this is so old but thak youuu ee

sorry i wrote them slow dancing im in a fluffy mood

if you were the only girl in the world

"sometimes when I feel bad, and things look blue..."

Gale taps his pencil against the paper in front of him and tries to decide if this was a sad song.

"I wish a girl I had… say one like you. Someone within my heart to build a throne"

He's sat on the sofa, feet tucked up underneath him like a child and trying to headache himself through the sort of mathematical problems that left even him feeling stupid. Bucky's supposed to be in the kitchen cooking a roast, but Gale isn't sure how much singing a slab of beef really needs in the cooking process. He's been banned, regardless of the signing, because the mess John left behind every time he cooked left Gale twitchy and irritable. He doesn't think it's hard to clean as one goes, but John thought it was faster to do it all at once.

"And what if you need something that's dirty?"

"Then I'll wash that one."

The singing draws nearer, bringing with it the smell of woodsy cologne and cigarettes.

"If you were the only girl in the world, and I were the only boy," John croons.

Gale looks up to find him leaning in the doorway, shirtsleeves rolled to his elbows and hair flopping out of its careful gel from steam. He looked good, looked healthy and whole and Gale thinks maybe five years out they were getting somewhere close to okay.

He recognizes the song now, an old Great War ditty that he'd heard crooned from open saloons and bars as a child.

"Bucky," He sighs, hunching over his work defensively, "I told you I'm all yours after supper."

John smiles at him, sweet and broad and eye-crinkling guileless and Gale isn't fooled by the beast underneath for a single second.

"Nothing-" He slides around the sofa and holds a hand out for Gale to take with a challenging smirk, "-else would matter in the world today, we would go on loving in the same old way."

His voice was still awful, but when it was less quiet and booming there was almost a melody to it, something Gale found pleasant if he were pressed to admit. Maybe it was rose-colored affection, maybe John just loved him enough to make the words sound good.

Gale takes John's hand but he makes sure to sigh at him enough to show his reluctance but John presses a bristly kiss to his cheek on the tug up and places his hand at a respectful spot on his waist and gets them swaying.

"A garden of Eden, just made for two," John says, leading him around their small living room, "with nothing to mar our joy."

Sometimes they bicker about it with their hands and their steps, who was leading. Nothing beyond playful, but they were both pilots both left-seaters and giving up the yoke wasn't something they did without good reason. But tonight Gale is content to give it over to John, starving for any moment where the other man's eyes were bright and clear and present. Better every year.

"I would say such wonderful things to you, there would be such wonderful things to do."

John gives over the lead to him, passing it off flawlessly and Gale sways them as John nuzzles his way into his shoulder.

"If you were the only girl in the world, and I were the only boy."

"Think those guys on base know you're such a softie?" Gale asks.

John scoffs, pulling back and freeing Gale back to his seat, "They think I'm somewhere between God and Captain America himself. I don't think it's even crossed their minds."

Gale hums, adjusts himself as John wraps arms around his waist, chin hooking over his shoulder to peer down at the paper.

"It's done wonders to heal your issue with humility"

"mm," John's lips press against his neck, "You're off by two numbers."

Gale pauses and then squints, curving his mouth into a crooked smile.

"So I am."

[midnight---hollow]

Ok i need to yap for a second

I love how well written and thought out the ipc is in honkai star rail. I feel in general we dont always get the best discussions about capitalism and giant corps because said giant corps are usually sponsoring or are creating them most of the time so there is usually bias. I just saw some of the boothill story lore leaks and im not gonna talk about them here cus leaks but it gave me real big appreciation for how the ipc is handled.

Im personally a real big fan of complicated situations in my fictional stories. Ever since mob psycho ive gained a new lens of trying to find sympathy and reason for any situation, keeping my own opinions and preferences while still understanding the other side. I feel star rail has done a great job at show casing the many sides of the ipc even if i for one really dont like the ipc and its my least favorite organization

(I feel i should also say this is an opinion piece and im not informed enough on the real life issues as i would like to be. I just want to yap my opinion out and express why i find joy in this and maybe even come back later with more research to make another post but with references and proof to explain why besides what i remember and like. If i do get anything wrong then please inform me cus i would like to learn more about this and plan to)

|Spoilers for basically all the ipc related things in hsr|

I started out hating them cus i just dont like capitalist corps and they just rubbed me the wrong way. When the arum alley event happen i was originally pissed at it because even though it was confirming my beliefs of “big corp bad” it felt cheap and like almost every other story told by a big corp trying to tell us big corps are bad. Yknow the “look at this obviously in the wrong guy dont be like him, look at him get his comeuppances in the end and ignore how we actually are alot more complicated and worse than this super evil and obvious example”

arum alley then did something i didnt expect. It gave nuance to the story. It started out with that obvious example yes but the next one wasnt that obvious, the next part of the event talked about how some workers feel they wont be able to sustain their lives as independent workers and feel they need to work for the big corps for a safe job and it started getting into the logistics of big corp vs independent business. Yeah we where fighting them but there where reasons and concerns and fears to be given. It wasnt just big corp bad it was “yeah big corp bad but here is why and here is also how its good” and it brings up the questions on what can be done so we dont need to rely on big corp

Topaz and her whole arc is another situation i find interesting. Topaz is a character i dont care to much about to be honest but i think she plays a good role in this whole ipc debacle. To me she feels like she represents someone who used the system because they needed to and made it work and flourished in the system. Her planet was basically unlivable and she lived in a capitalist waste that failed. In comes the ipc and they are almost what her world was but better for they offer to help and save them. All they need to do is sign their lives away to join the ipc and they did and their planet flourished because of it. Topaz herself was able to rise the ranks into being a cornerstone. I think her story shows both the light and dark of the ipc because they saved her planet but they only did it because it benefited them, if they didnt sign their lives away it is very likely topaz and everyone on her planet would have suffocated from the toxins and died. They had no choice but to join the system and its stated in game that topaz’s planet is one of the few that where able to be saved.

That’s probably what i like most about the playable ipc characters, it reminds us that these big corps arent just mustache twirling bad guys, it reminds us there are people there just trying to keep going and some of them are genuinely trying to do right and think what they are doing is right. Again topaz for example, she genuinely believes what she was doing was for the good of belabog. She saw a planet so similar to her own and i think she did what she thought was right and tried to help them (i dont think what she did was right but i can see where she comes from in thinking its right) i also think its showing that when she learned their was a way out for belabog that allowed them to not give their lives away to the ipc she gave in and stopped trying to convince them. She risked her own job security to allow them that right and because she didnt force an entire planet of innocent people who just got out of a horrible situation to sign their souls away (including the children mind you) she got demoted. Im not saying that she deserves a pat on the back for doing the bare minimum esp after she tried killing us, she is a rich, a conerstone, owns an exotic pet that she throws into battle and design her gun after, is a high member of said capitalist big corps, im just saying this is a very nuanced and interesting situation that i like to think about because there are so many thoughts and arguments

The whole belabog vs ipc thing was interesting in general for me because i think it was just such a good concept to bring forth the conversation of the goods and bads of big corps. Technically the ipc does have the right to want their century old debt repaid (ignoring the fact we later learned the robots where never used i think idk the end was confusing ngl) yet also at the same time we as people have a hard time siding with them when belabog didnt even know they where in debt because they where so isolated because of the stellaron and they just got out of the stellaron crisis and are trying to make their world habitable and yknow survive. We cant blame them for being unable to pay a humongous debt when these where the same people who stood in awe as march shower them a photo of their planet that she took while on the express. It creates a situation where yeah technically the giant corp has a right to take that money because its theirs but its still feels so cruel to make them have to cough it up right now with only a few days time. Belabog is basically forced to sign that deal because there is no way they could have payed that off they where doomed the moment topaz set foot on the planet. I remember talking to each of the people in belabog and getting their opinions on the matter and constantly having to rethink my stance because there where so many good points for why they should and so many for why they shouldnt. I can go on and on about this but this bit is already to long.

Aventurine!!! Aventurine aventurine oh where to start. Unlike topaz i actually like aventurine alot he is just such a well written character but we arent here to talk about how amazing him and the games writing is we are here to talk about the capitalist cooperation he is a cog in. Aventurine in a sense has a similar story to topaz but its more cruel and less happy. The ipc didnt save him, the ipc what going to arrest him and its thanks to his luck and a deal with the devil (or in this case a bet with a snake) that he was able to become aventurine.

I havent seen the writen stuff for him in his characters story because i dont have him but i will say from what i saw during the main story, something i question alot is what the ipc did during the avgin genocide. This might be a small tangent but the avgins said they had the support of the ipc. What happened that caused for the entire avgin civilization to be wiped out when they had the help of people with better weapons and armor and equipment. Apart of me is nihilistic enough to think the ipc didnt really care for saving the avgins and might have used the katakans attack as a way to know out the two groups that where causing them the most trouble but at the moment i dont know if theres anything supporting this theory so its just a crack theory

Aventurines spot in penacony is again interesting. Penacony is a prison planet of the ipc, that was taken over and turned into a party paradise thanks to the hamrony, family, and a stellaron. Aventurines goal was supposed to be to put penacony back in the ipcs control and to be honest i cant tell if thats his plan or not because of how crazy and confusing the story was (i loved it) but that being said it is another example how how grey ipc is. It isnt just a big bad corp there are people with lives and in avens case, people trying to gain their freedom with any risks necessary. I also think again the ipcs role in penacony is like belabog, very interesting, just for different reasons.

Penacony is based off America and in this case im assuming the ipc is their Britain. I feel like if you ask most people they would say that the ipc is the only group in penacony they hope fails (minus aventurine again i feel everyone wants aven to succeed even if we want ipc to fall) but i think the family being as grey as they are (basically a cult and also a representation of newer day amarica and its “its us or them” mentality in a way. I can make another yap ses about that lmao) adds an air of mystery and confusion on who we want to succeed since they are on two very different sides of the board so if one wins the other loses. It makes it feel like a fight of two big corps against each other and not really knowing who to support. Do you want to support the capitalist or the cult, pick your poison. We need the rest of penacony for me to go more in-depth on my opinion of ipc here and to rant but i can say its already making me question and argue both sides with what we have seen so far

That was fun for me. I havent ranted on tumblr in a long long time but hsr has been my recent hyperfixation and again boothill makes me crazy. While writing this is made me start to think about how much i wanted to talk about the hidden story of immigration i feel penacony is aso trying to tell. I think penacony is handling so many deep and interesting topics and im very excited for the next update. This has made me hyped to talk about the immigration stuff but i want to do reaserch and gain a proper strong stance besides “thats just my opinion.” I think this is an interesting topic and yapping about it made me want to do more reaserch on the topics of capitalism and big corps cus i hate them but i also think its important to know about it and understand there is more to the issue than just stingy old white rich people. I havent even gotten to jade yet. When we learn more about her imma have some words prob

Srry this was long but anyways cant wait till boothill comes out so i can get him and his light cone

[duchess-of-mandalore]

Do you have any thoughts on what Satine and Obi-Wan's lives and/or the galaxy at large would have looked like if she'd survived the events of The Lawless?

Oh man, this premise has an infinite number of answers depending on where you go with it. But I think I can give some general principles.

Like ... for example, Satine survives The Lawless but Order 66 is subverted. Actually, I wrote a fic about that (Tethers of Inconvenience), where Satine pursues an arranged marriage with a senator from Kuat (Giddean Danu, a character in the RotS deleted scenes) who would be able to help her rebuild and protect Mandalore, which she finds difficult to do on her own since she humiliated Palpatine and the Senate in TCW Season 2.

But more generally, if she survives The Lawless, I think Obi-Wan takes her back to Coruscant and she lives with Padme. She begs the Senate and Jedi to assist in dealing with the mess on Mandalore. I think that Bo's able to take the planet back, and she and/or Korkie lead since her brainless, idiot, fake-news-believing people are still convinced that she killed Pre Vizsla with her own hands and caused the downfall of their city.

Then, let's say that Order 66 does happen. You've got two diverging roads: 1) Obi-Wan is able to find her and bring her to Tatooine with him, in which case they get to raise Luke together and have a kind of strangely (im)perfect happily ever after living a quiet life neither one of them had before (wonderfully explored in @mg024's Two New Hopes) ...

Or 2) He can't get to her and has to leave her when he goes into hiding, like in @the-obiwan-for-me's Krennictine AU. This has a similar premise to my Marriage AU but with Orson Krennic. In both our AUs, I think we're of the same mind that Satine never loses her personal idealism, but she becomes much more practically minded. I think the run-in with Maul proves to her that "Even extremists can be reasoned with" is much, much too hopeful. I think she's always prepared to sacrifice her personal happiness for her people if need-be, but there's always that piece of her that's longing for her happy ending.

Imperial-era Satine is fascinating because she's the one who characterized the idealism of the Republic but who was really spared suffering by dying before the rise of the Empire. Personally, I think that Palpatine would take very great joy in trying to smash her like a bug once he has no guardrails, given that she was one of the only people who publicly stood against him during the Clone War. I mean ... we kind of forget that after the Republic and the CIS, the largest political entity at play in the Clone War was the Council of Neutral Systems, led by Satine. She's a symbol of the Republic era and she wouldn't go quietly into the night once the man she's always despised proclaims himself Emperor.

I think Palpatine would immediately try to take over Mandalore (canonically, he did within the first year of his reign because he was still using a clone trooper army). In a SatineLives AU, whether he immediately succeeds would probably rest on whether she's willing to negotiate for her people's freedoms (like Bo did with Gideon in The Mandalorian), but even if she did, Palpatine would probably just renege on any agreement they had.

In general though, I lean more toward her giving up any claim to the throne permanently because she thinks Bo (and a Korkie hardened by both The Lawless and the rise of the Empire) can meet Mandalore's needs more than she can.

And if that's the case ... if she has no Mandalore and no Obi-Wan ... I could see her doing something like creating a relief organization that essentially goes from planet to planet cleaning up the effects of the Empire and then eventually becoming a secret organization focusing on saving and rehabilitating injured rebels. It's her way of maintaining her pacifistic ideals in a world where she no longer has the ability to remain fully neutral.

If anyone has any thoughts on these ideas or others of your own, I'd love to hear them!

[that-one-weeb-buts-its-the-main]

Ronin raising a baby left at the door-step| pt.1

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Reader: female - the baby

Notes: i live for this man and father daughter content, and also Part One <3

Warnings: Yelling, Baby Y/n throwin punches bc she dont take no shit 👊

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We're gonna go being left on the door step daughter father content here

Left at the doorstep of the leafmans barracks with a little tag that said "Commander of the Leafman army"

Some rookies found you, all bundled up in a hand woven basket.

So they take you to Ronin, whos probably already on his 40th cup of caffine that day

"Ronin!"

"Busy-"

"This is important."

He looks up at his soilders, and tells them to come in.

There they are. With you. No more than a month or two old asleep in the bundle of blankets.

"What? Sanchez finally had her baby? On Duty no less? That woman has to be strapped down for bed rest."

"No...sir. She was at the barracks entrence."

What? Huh?

Did he hear that right?

"By who?"

The soliders shrugged.

Ronin was quick to get up and the soilders handed him the baby.

"Basket had your title on it sir." One spoke, "Does that help identify the parents at all? You know anyone who was havin a baby sir?"

"Just Sanchez." Ronin answered, he too wanted to get to the bottom of this, "Find her and her wife, make sure there okay. Both of you go together."

And off they went, he sat down with you, a big yawn coming from you.

Truth be told he didn't know who this child was or who's it could be.

But he thought it was cute how you grabbed onto his finger, eyes big and gray, your color hadn't come in yet.

Yet he could assume you had been born with that ashy black color hair. You had a pretty decently full head of it after all.

And that's when he saw it.

A pendant around your neck, tucked away and hidden, in the blankets.

Wraithwood.

A product of two worlds colliding.

Then and there he knew he had to keep you safe.

You were innocent in this war and in this world.

The soldiers come back; tell him what he already knows; it's not Sanchez's, and Sanchez is standing guard, pregnant as ever.

"Let's bring her to the Orphanage," one recommended, "They'll know what to do,"

"No," Ronin ordered, "She was left here, for a reason,"

"But sir, she's a baby, no offense, sir, but can you handle a baby,"

"I handle you two, don't I?"

Leafmen that see him leaving are in shock; did him and Tara finally get together? Have a kid? Wait had him and Tara been together this whole time?

Yet despite there stares he holds you close and leaves with you home.

Nod's was home, he putting dishes away; he was always home before Ronin.

"Don't tell me you brought home a baby aphid when you told me no," Was the first thing Nod told him when he seen the blankets.

Nod was quiet shocked when he was shown the baby.

"Who's kid?"

"Orphaned, staying with us just for a little bit. Till we figure it out."

Oh what a lie.

You were staying forever.

Lets just say: the first few days? Shit the first day was stressful

What are they suppose to feed you?

You certainly don't eat ration packets- or quiet frankly....anything

For there luck the old lady next store was real tired of hearing it and knocked on the door.

Nod answers the door.

"Why is that child trying like she hasnt eaten in an hour?"

"She won't eat."

"Move aside."

Props to the old lady coming to the rescue and saving Ronin's ass

"Milk Lily's tend to be the norm, especially when my children were growing up, I'll give you a list of needs and some milk lillies from my own garden to start you off with- Where is your wife Ronin? She must be tired from the bundle of joy."

"There's no wife," Ronin informed, "Someone dropped her off at the barracks."

"Then I can call up my sister. She works at the orphanage. Will that help any?"

Ronin was silent, looking up at the old lady rocking the child, "Im keeping her."

"Well..." The old woman started, "she is certainly cute. I dont blame you... You'll need a few things"

Bam Baby list.

It's just the essentials, really, especially for the age.

The first weeks were really hard on Ronin

Like really hard, hes use to no sleep. But...damn...

They can find both of you sleeping when Ronin has downtime in his office

And sometimes the other soilders take you to play with you.

"She can't walk yet idiot!"

"It's called training for a reason!"

Ronin after weeks of having you: has yet to name you

People litterally just call you "baby"

That's until one day he's coming home with you in a sling one of the soldiers had shown him how to wrap, he's coming back from his Milk Lily farmers.

Nod's not home: as he's on night rounds covering Sanchez's shift- finally she had taken bed rest

So the window at the end of the hall being opened confused him

He called for Nod but got no answer.

So he set you in the basket of groceries: you know. For safekeeping as something sounds in the kitchen.

Before he can even round the corner and into the kitchen he's attacked from behind,

Arms wrapped around him to choke him, hoping to kill him easily and cheaply.

Yet Ronin kicks as he's dragged and manages to grab the dagger that sits on his belt besides his sword and stabs backward at anything physically possible

Into the shoulder and let go he turns to face the intruder

A boggin woman, "Where is it!?"

"I have no idea what the hell you're on about!"

Yet the crying in the background catches ear, and it's a race for the baby. The woman gets there first and gets through his front door.

"Fuck!" Ronin shouts quickly following grabbing his spare bow and arrows at the doorside.

With his skill it was a simple shot and down the woman went. He running to grab you as you cried.

"It's okay. It's okay..." Ronin cooed, "shh...my Y/n...shh."

The commotion grabbed neighbor's attentions as they came out to help

"Ronin, are you -"

"Call the gravedigger..."

"Are you alright? The both of you?"

The people only got a nod as he walked back to his home.

And from that day forward you're named Y/n.

No particular reason he claims anyone who asks in the future

Its a lie, he had been thinking about it for a while

He'd be lying if he didn't get even more attached to you, especially as the months came through: you're eyes matched your hair in orgin: that yellow orange that came from Wraithwood with the midnight hair

As you get older too Nod takes a more brotherly role.

And Ronin finally introduces you to Tara closer to your year old mark.

"I have been wanting to meet you for some time." Tara smiled, lifting Y/n into the air with a smile.

Yet you reach back for Ronin

Totally does not hurt Tara's pride- it really hurt

"She's not keen on new people"

"Oh, she's your daughter for sure then." Tara teased.

Tara was right there

No matter what you were pretty attached to your dad.

Though your first words werent Dada, they were idiot and leaf.

He knew exactly who he had to make run laps because of that

You were an early bloomer, walked early, started babbling one or two words early

He was pretty proud of you.

There was no "big 1st birthday" party for you.

It was just you and Ronin, and Nod, Uncle Finn coming to watch you destroy a pie as you tried to eat it.

Pie is just about your third word.

Finally something more normal.

Besides that, you don't talk very much, even as you grow, and as you grow, Ronin, kinda not by his desires, gets pushed into a Mommy group.

Judgmental mommys are ass mommys

"Well, she doesn't talk yet. That's concerning." A mother commented.

"Y/n can talk when she wants. Isn't that right? Y/n?"

He only gets you hugging him tighter in response.

1000% daddys girl

You come to enjoy playing with his gear.

All of it

Weapons included.

And as your old enough to play on your own with kids your age, you don't

You prefer Older people to younger people: find friendship in the old man that sits on the corner with his coffee in the moring rather than people your age.

100% as you become older and able to play by yourself with no one watching over you (which isnt full true ronins always there somewhere in the background) you can be sure you'd come home with a pet aphid

"His names Charly! But with a Y! I don't like it spelled with ie!"

"Y/n let the Aphid go."

"No way! Charly needs me!"

Charly infact does need you.

And even grows up with you: as he was pretty young when you found him

The Adventures of Charly and Y/n have began

Ronin's the dad that says "were not keeping the aphid" and then becomes bestfriends with said aphid

Honestly? Really proud of himself for once when it comes to you, he's been really critical of himself in the past, seeing you be so loving and caring towards people you love really warms his heart.

Will let you sleep in his bed if you have a bad dream.

Yes Charly can come too

Shit Nods squeezing himself in there too

First day of schooling?

Ooo...he's worried about that one

No Charly to be with you, no one to keep that sass held back a little

Turns out you didn't want to go.

You cried- alot

"I don't want you to go!"

"I'll be back in a few hours. I promise -"

Holding onto him, she cried harder, "No! I don't want you to go!"

Only got you to stop crying with removing the creast from his helmet he had in hand

"See. I'll always be in here." He spoke tapping the metal.

"Really?" She asked, he wipping the big drew drop sized tears.

Ronin nodded, "It'll keep you safe. Like I do."

Y/n nodded as he kissed her head.

"No leafman-" he started

"Is truly alone." She finished as he smiled at her.

"Now. Go. I don't believe in anyone more than I do you."

Turns out school wasn't bad, and you were excited to do it again.

Bad idea on giving you the crest: you simply haven't let go of it

During school hours especially, holding it while your eating: while your at playtime standing alone. Its in your pocket if you have to use both hands

During anytime your at home your more leniate with it: sits at the table by your spot at the table, or under your pillow if you want a good dream, or on your dresser if your drying it from being freshly cleaned and polished.

Alot of kids repeat stuff from there parents. So alot of people ask if your moms Queen Tara

"I don't know Queen Tara." Y/n answered.

"Sure you do! You're her daughter!"

Y/n shook her head no, "she's not! My Dad's My mom and dad!"

"My mama says you're a half breed." A girl spoke up

"I am not!

"Yeah, you have that werid colored eyes because you're from Wraithwood!" A boy added.

"I am not!"

"My Momma said your momma got attacked by your daddy from Wraithwood, and that's why you're a half breed!" A third.

"I am not!"

"Yeah, you are! Momma says that the only reason Commander Ronin takes care of you is because they didn't wanna spread rumors!" The girl again, "the same thing with your brother! Your daddy probably killed his daddy!"

"That's not true! My Dad's My dad! My dad wouldn't abandoned me!" Y/n shouted, "My dad wouldnt hurt anyone!"

"He's not even your dad!-"

Then all the sudden your in trouble.

Like big trouble.

Punched someone in the face trouble.

And Nod's there to get you instead of Ronin

He gets the silent treatment as he walks the two of you home

You can sure Ronin's PISSED when he gets home

He's let you hang around "soilders" for too long

He's actually never yelled at you before.

Then again you've never gone to school before

Watching you physically flinch as he's yelled at you trying to get an answer out of you stopped him in his tracks

He's absolutely floored

Deadstop

What the fuck did you flinch for? Did you think he was gonna hit you? He's never hit you before?! Why would he do it now-

His response is shutting down: nothing like this has ever happened before and his shutting down is building up walls.

Seems you've latched onto that idea after the first time he yelled at you.

You stay away from him: you didn't show up to dinner so Nod brought you some.

Your hiding under the bed.

And he sits against the bed, a plate close enough for you to grab on the floor.

"Whats wrong baby bean?" Nod asked, yet she was quick to grab the food.

"Dad hates me...I'm not even his...." She responded, looking down at her favorite meal made, it only upset her more and she pushed it back out from under the bed.

"Ronin could never hate you." Nod answered, "He loves you, in his own way...sure-"

"Yeah? And I'm not even his."

"Y/n your his everything."

"Then why is everyone saying he hurt someone. And I'm not his."

It takes Nod a solid few mintues to figure out whats actually going on

He's realizing kids are most likely repeating there parents gossip

Which is lies anyways.

But it looks like you need more time than anything

So when he leaves and you're left in your room by yourself with Charly

You end up eating dinner with your hands, your aphid eating off the plate with you

Ronin's surpised to find a plate washing and air dried in the bathroom the next morning.

"Where'd this come from?"

Nod leaned against the doorframe rubbing the tired our his eyes: "Mhm? Y/n's probably."

"On the sink top?"

"Look, be glad she's okay, alright?" Nod argued, "She had a rough day yesterday."

"She had a rough day?" Ronin asked sarcastically, "Nod she floored a kid-"

"Alright. Yeah, whatever." Nod answered, rubbing his face as he slipped away for caffine.

So...with the thought now in his mind he went to go see how your doing.

Sleeping most likeky

Yet he finds an empty bed, and an open window.

"Y/n?" Ronin asked, no answer: and his worry spiked, "y/n-"

Yet the chirp of an aphid caught his attention as it slipped from under the bed to stretch, and Ronin was quick to kneel down and look under the bed.

There you were asleep and hiding, as far back as you could against the wall

So he does what ever dad does.

Moves the bed to get to you.

You're still sleeping when he picks you up

Your head on his shoulder and little legs wrapped around him.

Okay, maybe he wants to hold you like a baby again: it makes him sad almost, how fast you grew up.

You wake up but stay silent: After all your father hadn't held you in quiet a while.

[harry-styles-obsessed]

Request: all day i’ve been thinking about harry x reader who matilda is about, maybe reader was a fan before they met, they somehow started dating, and i just neeeeed to know your opinion on her first reaction to the song

Omgggg I adore this!! Thank you so much for the request!! I hope this is okay, and what you were looking for!! ❤️‍🩹 apologies for the delay and not writing!! Life has been crazy.

Im sorry but I literally LOVE the line ‘I know they won’t hurt you anymore as long as you can let them go’ thats such a beautiful multilayered thing to say, like- don’t hold onto the people who hurt you… just let them go. Gods it’s so beautiful I can’t 😩🥹

©️ please do not copy or translate my work.

You can let it go

It was safe to say you always struggled with your mental health. You were constantly battling that alongside your family. Your family weren’t the best. Sure they took care of you, but didn’t look after you properly. They didn’t make you feel loved… it hurt you terribly. But then you met Harry and your family became nonexistent. Harry became the light in your life, your happiness, your world, your absolute joy… you remembered the time you told him about your family. How he listened. Holding your hand, bringing it to his lips and kissing it oh so delicately as he nodded occasionally as if to show that he was listening… he actually cared and that broke you yet made you beyond happy all at once, you remembered how frightened you were to open up to him. To tell him that your family didn’t take care of you… that you were lost… but in the end it was the best thing you could’ve done for it opened up the fact that you were struggling. He acted as your life jacket: he saved your life.

You had been a fan of Harry for years, you never thought you’d meet him but you did and well the rest is history… you and him hit it off pretty quickly and immediately began dating but you both kept your relationship with each other out of the public eye. It was easier that way. Privacy was important to the both of you. You were sat in your bedroom that you shared with Harry, the man had been on his phone nonstop and it was starting to really worry you. Sure you struggled with abandonment issues but it wasn’t necessarily your fault. You had experienced nothing but horrendous treatment from your family and it was frankly something you didn’t like to look back on.

“You know you’re kind of freaking me out” you murmur towards him, his emerald green eyes instantly meeting with yours his expression softening “I’m sorry baby… I’m just getting permission for something real quick.” He spoke eyes returning to his phone and you gave him an exasperated look clearly confused and worried all at once. What seemed like hours passed by but really only a couple minutes passed Harry’s lips tugging upwards into a warm smile before he stood up “come with me” he spoke extending his hand out towards you, you quickly taking his hand as he walked with you downstairs and guiding you gently into the living room,

“Sit”

He spoke softly and you sat down watching as he turned on the speaker that was situated just beside the tv, connecting his phone to it “you ready sweetheart?” He glanced at you and you only nodded, still a bit worried and soon enough Harry had set his phone down onto the table coming to sit beside you as a beautiful melodic tune began, echoing from the speaker and wrapping around you like a warm comforting hug your heart suddenly threatening to jump out of your chest… a new song. You licked over your lips anxiously immediately melting into Harry’s side as he held you close his slender fingertips stroking just against your hair as he began pressing soft kisses to the top of your head.

You were riding your bike to the sound of “it’s no big deal.” And you’re trying to lift off the ground on those old two wheels. Nothing about the way that you were treated ever seemed especially alarming ‘til now. So you tie up your hair and smile like it’s no big deal. You can let it go you can throw a party full of everyone you know not invite your family cause they never showed you love, don’t have to be sorry for leaving and growing up.

Tears suddenly brimmed your eyes a shaky breath leaving your lips as you sank further into Harry’s side, your lower lip trembling as he began rubbing soothing circles against your back… he said that the first time you opened up to him. “Don’t worry about them y/n. This is their loss. You don’t have to be sorry for leaving.” A lump formed in your throat as you held onto harry tighter your knuckles turning white from the grip you had on his T-shirt your chest aching,

Matilda you talk of the pain like it’s all alright. But I know that you feel like a piece of you’s dead inside. You showed me a power that is strong enough to bring sun to the darkest days. It’s none of my business but it’s just been on my mind…

A tear trailed down your cheek finally as a sob bubbled from your throat, your head falling onto his shoulder… it reminded you how before you and him started dating he would always ask why you didn’t want to go home… he knew it was none of his business but he was worried about you and it wouldn’t leave his mind. It was beautiful… he had written this song about you. About your troubles. About what made you feel weak. What terrified you… and he turned it into something truly beautiful and it was honestly leaving you awe-struck. He converted your pain from agony and sobbing all through the night in his embrace to something comforting… that it was in fact alright that you didn’t want to waste your time on the family that showed you no love what so ever.

You can let it go. You can throw a party full of everyone you know, not invite your family cause they never showed you love. You don’t have to be sorry for leaving and growing up, you can see the world following the seasons anywhere you go you don’t need a reason cause they never showed you love don’t have to be sorry for doing it on your own. Your just in time make your tea and your toast…

That line was significant to you. You always arrived a little later than expected but always nearly on time at Harry’s house and he would make you tea and toast, every single time, and you’d both have a catch up because you couldn’t leave your home at that time… Harry guided you through the process and helped you leave. He never gave up on you. Never.

You don’t have to go. You don’t have to go home, there’s a long way to go. I don’t believe that time will change your mind. In other words I know they won’t hurt you anymore as long as you can let them go. You can let it go, you can throw a party full of everyone you know you can start a family who will always show you love don’t have to be sorry for doing it on your own. You can let it go you can throw a party full of everyone you know you can start a family who will always show you love you don’t have to be sorry, no….

Your tearful eyes moved to look at Harry who had the same look in his eyes yet he looked so fucking proud. Whether that be pride in his song… or pride in you. “Do I have permission from you to release this song onto my album?” Your lower lip trembled as you nodded your head quickly wrapping your arms around him holding onto him tightly not daring to let go of him as soft sobs left your lips, his large hand stroking up and down your back as he gripped onto you tightly “you can let it go… okay sweetheart?” You didn’t answer, instead holding onto him tighter, not daring to let go your fingers curling into his hair your breathing shaky as your sobs continued escaping your lips. “I love it so much… it’s so beautiful… s-so comforting…” he pressed continuous kisses to your head not letting you go as he rocked you back and forth ever so slightly “I love you so much y/n.” He murmured against your head gently and you smiled weakly, emotions continuing to smash against you rather roughly “I love you so much too Harry… thank you. Thank you for sav-“ “shh. I didn’t do that y/n. You did all of that. You did.” He pulled back looking into your eyes gently pointing one finger against your chest “you, did all of it. You left the home… yet you remained strong. And that was all you.” His hand caressed against your cheek and you smiled lower lip continuing to tremble before you leaned in pressing a kiss to his lips keeping you lips against his “you. Saved. My. Life.” You spoke against his lips before you hugged him again, now sprawled out on his lap his hands rubbing up and down your sides holding you lovingly not daring to let go of you making sure you knew you were loved. Because you were and are so so loved.

Never forget that. You are loved. Never apologise for doing what’s right for you. Love yourselves.

[marcellaasblog]

Nothing more.

Part 1

Main masterlist

Best friend Eddie Munson x best friend reader

Summary: Eddie knew what he needs to do but plans take a turn for the worst.

Warnings: so much angst ! Hurt/no confort

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When Eddie walked out that day he felt his heart snap in two he never wanted to hurt you or to see you cry ,he cares for you and loved you.

He needed to clear his mind and figure out what the hell he was going to do so he didn't bother stopping by your house for a couple of days until he felt like he was ready and because he needed to talk to beth but either way he was leaving someone with a broken heart.

.

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You haven't spoken to Eddie or seen him at all ,you locked yourself in your house sobbing into your hands as you stayed put on your bed ,you don't even remember the last time you took a shower you smelled and you knew that but you had no care in the world to even give a fuck about yourself you just sat and stayed still letting whatever happens happen.

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Eddie knew what he had to do and he needed to talk to beth immediately. He couldn't live in lie and sadness he had enough of that as a child and he wasn't going to do that to someone he loves or to himself.

Beth called Eddie out of work early today he didn't know why but she said she needed to talk to him.

Did you talk to beth?

Was she going to do the easy work for him and call it off.

Eddie rushed into the house leaving his work boots outside as he opens the door to see that the living room lights were dimmed and the table was set with Velvet red table cloth and a lit candle as dinner was already served for them.

What the hell was she going all out for? It's dinner.

Eddie called out Beth's name.

"boo"

"shit don't scare me like that beth."

"sorry I just wanted to surprise you ,so do you like it?" She asked sticking her hands out like a 5 grader trying to show off their school project.

"yeah I do baby what is this for?" He scratched his hair taking off his uniform top.

"well I did say I had some great news for us." She said kissing his cheek.

"It's now or never Munson". Eddie said to himself.

"great that's good but before you say anything I need to talk to you real quick."

Eddie tried to sit down beth as she held up her hands.

"WAIT NO MINE CAN'T WAIT ,SORRY IM JUST GONNA GIVE IT TO YOU ALREADY." beth giggles going behind the couch bringing out a small red bag.

"open please" she jumped in excitement

"beth please let me ta-" she cut him off

"omg Just open it."

Eddie's annoyed and irritated so he open the bag to see two plane tickets to Chicago.

His eyes go wide.

"what is this.?" He asked holding up the tickets

"well my dad wanted us to move over their with him you know get away from this hell whole."

No!

I don't want this,.

I don't want you.

I don't want any of this.

"uh why?" He asked setting the plane tickets on the table

"keep looking their is one more thing in Their."

Eddie removed all of the colorful tissue that was on top of the last gift he opened the box to see a cute little onesie saying "best dad ever".

Eddie's blood went cold and his face dropped.

"I'm pregnant Eddie and I asked my dad to buy us plane tickets to move so we can have a better future for our kid." Beth said rubbing her stomach as she cry's tear of joy.

"I'm gonna be a dad." Eddie voice wobble as he starts to tear up.

"yeah you are your gonna be the best dad." Beth cry's as Eddie Neals down putting his head on her stomach. Eddie cry's tear of happniess that he gets to be a dad but at the same time he sad that it was to late for you and him to ever happen.

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Another week goes by of doing the same thing but this time was differentm

you got up to put your dish away you heard a knock on your front door you looked out the peep whole only to see a head full of curls you didn't want to open it but you knew yall had to talk it out one day .

You slowly open the door peeking your head out squinting at the daylight.

"hey" Eddie said biting the inside of his cheek

"hey what's up what are doing here."

"can I come in?" Eddie asked as his eyes get teary

"why?"

"I need to talk to you and this is my only chance I have so please let me in baby." The pet name made your heart thump and you didn't like how he has such a hold over you .

You open the door letting him come in. He quickly sits down on the couch

"look I I can't be here for long so I'm just going to get straight to the point. y/n I love you so much ,I really do I fell in love with you the day you hit those jocks with that baseball bat after they jumped me , I fell in love with you when you sat with me at lunch I fell in love with you more when you were their when my mom died or when my dad went to prison you were always their for me and I never had that before it wasn't something I was use to and I'm sorry I'm hurting you I never meant to i-"

Eddie voice become shaky as he trys to finish his sentence.

"I love you the same way you love me and that love Will never go away,I'm sorry I ran out I was just stunned that you felt the same and I'm so so sorry sweetheart I don't want to hurt you but I know I'm about to .

Your lips wobbled as you bitting your tounge shifting uncomfortably in the sofa.

"I'm leaving Hawkins tomorrow"

You felt like your world was crashing you couldn't say anything your mouth was dry and your eyes were wet

Eddie didn't want to look up at you cause he knows his baby is crying Infront and he didn't want to see your red face and teary eyes knowing he was the one making you cry.

Eddie wipes his face with the back if his hand .

"Beth's dad got us tickets to move over their and I couldn't say no"

You were Angry sad frustrated wanting him just to leave right now.

"why couldn't you say no?"

Eddie took a deep breath before standing up from the sofa

"Beth pregnant"

You looked at him belief how can he confess his love for you then say he has a child on the way.

"your gonna be a dad" you cry out hysterically so happy for him .

"yeah I'm gonna be the best fucked dad I can be." He laughs wiping away his tears .

You didn't know what to say you him wanted out.

"well congratulations but I think it time for you to go."

"wait wait no please I'm only doing this for the baby I don't love beth I love you and im sorry it took me so long I'm so fucken sorry.

"Eddie please go."

Eddie grabbed both of your arms stopping you so he can see you one last time face to face.

you could see his teary eyes red nose and plumed lips.

"I promise I promise I'll be back for you okay I only love you I and I will never stop loving you but I'm not gonna leave my child like my parents left me I'm not gonna do that so please I'm begging you just to wait a little longer for me ." Eddie sobbed taking your face into his hands .

"please Eddie don't do this to me I can't ,not again" you cry feeling your heart burn in your chest.

"NO sweetheart I promise I'm coming back just give me some time , it was always been you." Eddie kisses your forehead laying his head on your."

You wanted to believe him but you couldn't.

"how do I know if your telling me the truth" you look up into Eddie eyes wiping away the single tear that slid down his cheek."

"by doing this."

Eddie grabs your face pressing his lips against yours,you didn't know what to do but you knew it wasn't gonna last so you savior the last bit of love you had for him. The kiss was messing he pulls you in by your ass sliding his tounge into your mouth feeling the hot tears stream down his face onto your cheek y'all both moan into the kiss never wanting to stop but then again Eddie wasn't your's and never would be.

You let go of his lips as Eddie trys to chase your lips crying at the sudden end of the taste of you on his .

"I think it's time for you to go now." You walk to the door opening it for him."

"baby I promise I'll be back for you Just give me some time and we can finally be together okay y/n? ." He said said walking out of your front door.

"I love you y/n please don't forget what we have."You nodded your head wiping your cheek .

"we never had anything Eddie and you know that,you are not mine."

" But I love you y/n" Eddie said standing still in front of your door full on crying not caring if your neighbors could here.

You didn't say anything back ,you slammed the door not taking his promises to heart because you know y'all were never gonna happen and you weren't gonna give your hopes up.

You were best friends and nothing more and maybe it should of stayed like that.

[wildglitch]

Spider-man x Batfam Prompt's

Ok so lately I have seen a lot of "Spidy goes to gotham and gets adopted fics" probably cause of Dark Matter by mysterycyclone cause like, duh, that fic is a goddamn masterpiece. But I feel like a lot of them are sort of the same thing with diffrent fonts ans it feels a bit saturated. Not all of them...but most of them.

Am I saying that there needs to be less of these fics? Hell no! Keep writing them please. I just feel like there could be more variety is all.

I suggest maybe try one of these ideas out

1: Peter going straight to the Batfam or other heros (dosent always have to be Batfam) and they try to work together on how to get him home, while slowly realizing "omg, your life is terrible! We want to help you, we do, but maybe we shouldnt and try to give you a better life here. Then its just a moral delema on what to do as they get to know the spider child.

2: maybe another Spider-man is the one that goes to Hotham like Andrew or Toby. Insted of being sent home at the end of NWH, they where accidentally sent to the DCU. Or maybe one of the Spider verse characters or a cartoon version of the character. Dosent always need to be Toms Spider-man.

3: on that same note. Please give more love to What If...Zombies Peter. You guys have no Idea the amount of angst and "haha, my world ended and im fine" potental there is. And you can have the other surviving member also be there as they look for eachother (characters that "survived* (no one survived that episode) are Peter, King T'challa, Scott Lang+cape, and Ig Bruce Baner/Hulk, and Bucky Barnes since we never saw them get turned or eaten) just think about Spidey and the Batfam investigating a lab or sometbing and all of a sudden they find floating head Scott in a crate. Everyone if scared shitless while Peter is crying tires of joy as he moves to hug the floating head. Think about that and tell me Im not on to something here.

4: Have the fic start our like halfway through. Maybe skip him getting to Gotham and have him be there for a few months already or something. This will help with adding more crack fics.

5: Maybe have the fic be that Peter is there for a while, he knows everyone, they know him, they might or might not know the identitys but they trust eachother. And Peter has been looking for a way home and he finally finds it! But... he accidentally brings some of the Batfam with him. So now its the Batfams turn to learn to live in the MCU with help of Spidy and they finally understand so much about him, how he lived, and vigilanties he knows (team red!) As they learn the history and pubilc opinion or Spider-man and the world.

6: Just a react to fic. Yk, those fics where they're stuffed in a room and forced to watch something? Yeah. Have the Dark Matter cast stuffed in a room and watch some MCU clips. It dosent even have to be some magic forth wall bull shit if you dont like that. In chapter 44, Peter and co. are said to be going back to the cave, and Peter still have is suit. Canonically, Karen records everything. Maybe Peter ends up so tired he dosent even want to try to explain everything. So he just hooks up Karen to the computer and and has her show them everything from the suits recordings to security cameras and news reports, to the memes and videos spiderman fans have made.

7: have the Justice League get involed cause "Hes to bright to be one of yours Bruce!" And have him be a honorary member of the league of have them put him on Young Justice. Peter gets adopted by Batfam? Yes. Peter becomeing Bffs with the Young Justice kids and actually forming normal relationships with kids his age? Also yes.

Do I have more? Probably but Im too lazy for it rn

If you for some reason use one of my ideas, pls tag me and maybe credit me for the original idea (but I mostly want to be able to find the fic if you do make it ( o_o) )

Who knows, I might just write some of these myself if I ever get the motivation lol

[dreamlifebunny]

hi~ i just wanted to know your thoughts or opinions on tarot readings? i got into reading tarot about a year ago and it turns out i am pretty good at it ! i get so inspired and really feel like im helping people when i give them readings. im not really sure if it's on brand for neville's teachings though. I've been a bit torn cause I really do fully believe in the virtues of both NG and divination, but it's kind of hard cause law of assumption is all about finding answers from the inner man, not from external sources (like tarot cards...) so i just wanted to know if you have any advise on keeping a balance of these things or maybe i should walk away from tarot practices altogether? yeah im not really sure, but any thoughts you have would be much appreciated 🫶🏻

OMG ANON, this is my favourite question EVER!! I completely understand what you mean, it's hard to "believe" in or use tarot when you know that you create your own reality and answers. However, I think that tarot is a super great tool for us to get to know our limiting beliefs and help us along our manifesting journeys!

Before I begin, I wanted to say that I think you are very wise to be questioning two seemingly "opposing" beliefs (tarot as an external source, law of assumption as an internal source). Spirituality and truth come from asking questions and getting to the very core of our beliefs, and I think you're doing good work here by trying to figure this out and asking these questions! ❤️

At its core, tarot is a collection of universal symbols that humanity has repeatedly identified with and recognized over time. It's very easy for us to look at a card's imagery and see how it reflects our own lived experiences. With this in mind, tarot is actually a really great way for us to better understand ourselves and our beliefs and solidify our manifesting practice!

I'll give you a couple examples. Let's say that I know for a fact that all of my desires have already been said "yes" to and that all I need to do is relax and be excited and fulfilled. If I asked, "where am I blocked in my manifestation?" and I pulled the Four of Cups, the card could be telling me that I am being handed my desire but I keep saying "no" to it by not believing that it is already mine!

Another example could be that I know that all I need to do is go within myself and fulfill the inner man. If I ask the question "where am I blocked in my manifestation?" and pull the Five of Pentacles, it could be saying that I am ignoring the warmth and abundance that is inside myself and instead am choosing to wander around the outside world looking for confirmation!

As you can see, I am not relying on the tarot to tell me whether or not my desire is coming, because the truth of the Law of Assumption has already given me that answer; a resounding yes! Instead, I am using the tarot to show me where I am straying from the truth, and getting advice on where I can reclaim my power as I Am.

In a way, we can use tarot similarly to how Neville used the bible; he analyzed the bible and re-framed the content to better understand and reflect the truths of the Law of Assumption, and we can do the same using tarot! The Law is the truth, and the tarot helps us return to that truth when used in a helpful way.

Additionally, there is absolutely nothing wrong with using tarot even though you know the truth of the Law of Assumption. For example, we know that we can lose weight without working out simply by assuming we have lost weight, but some people absolutely love going to the gym and have fun working out, so they should absolutely keep doing that! Same with tarot; we know that we can find all of the answers we need inside of ourselves, but we are also humans who struggle with human problems and tarot can be a really comforting and fun thing. Plus, if you get super inspired doing tarot and it brings joy to your life, then you ABSOLUTELY should continue doing it! 💗 Manifesting and Neville's teachings come from a place of wanting to feel the absolute most lovely feelings and give yourself the best life possible, and if tarot gives you lots of happy feelings then that is the best thing ever! 🥰

And really when you think of it, tarot may seem like "external" source, but where do you get all of the answers from when you pull a card? Yourself! You go within your mind and your own experience and intuition and you give yourself and others wonderful answers through the cards. In this way, tarot is actually a great way for us to externalize what we already know internally. It's kinda like when you feel sad or angry so you choose to journal all of the feelings out; as soon as you get it out, you get answers to your questions and you feel relief for having externalized it all.

Finally, the way that I learned tarot is to use it to tell a story; who are the characters? How does their story progress in the pictures of the cards we pull? Self / I Am / God wanted to live an infinite number of lives to experience its wonderful limitlessness, just like how human beings want to create beautiful stories and art. Tarot helps us understand our own human story, and that is a lot of fun and a huge comfort, even when we already know the truth!

(Also keep in mind, not a lot of people know or believe in the Law, which makes reading tarot for others such a beautiful way to give them positive news and make them feel good about themselves! And what a beautiful and lovely thing that is ❤️)

Hopefully this answers your question anon, I really appreciate such a thoughtful question and I hope you continue to pursue whatever makes you happiest and always returning to your belief in the law! 🥰 Also, pleaseeeee DM me if you ever wanna talk more about tarot and the law!!! Hehe.

Finally: I truly encourage everyone to look at any spiritual belief that you have or that you used to have and turn it over in your minds until you get to the core truth. Learn new things, test them out, and expand your mind and your beliefs against the things that you already know! I'll make a post on this later, because it is a really beautiful thing to explore :) Big hugs! ❤️

[bluxb3rry]

❝𝐝𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐦!❞↳෴੭˚ ༘♡·˚₊˚ˑ༄ؘ 💜

Hyunjin x male reader! He/him pronouns! English is not my frist language! More angst? idk ── ⋅⋅⋅ ────꒰ ୨ ♡ ୧ ꒱───────

In a world were only Kings and Queens rule, the money its the most important thing. Who has it, wins and who doesn’t, dies.

Thats what his father always told him, when he was just a little boy and inocent, afraid of the oh so called "real world", he was though how to steal and act, how to make People see him with pity only to steal their bread.

-Y/N, never try to take orders from someone else, only from me even if im dead-

His father was the reason he still steals, his father was the reason of why he fought, he stold, he ran and he got hurt in his name.

So, it was only fair to blame him in this situation.

-Y/N L/N, its funny seeing you like this right now, you promised to kill every single one of us by now, remeber?-one of the guards told him, while he was in the floor with blood coming out of his mouth.

-What a piece of shit, i wonder why that prince wants you still alive, you should die by now-

-fuck you-Y/N said

Then everything turned black.

── ⋅⋅⋅ ────꒰ ୨ ♡ ୧ ꒱───────

When he opened his eyes again, he felt tired and pain all over his body, looking at the ceiling and his gold details, with also a big painting of clouds in it. Already knowing where he was he just looked around, trying to find the window thats its hopefully open. He sat slowly in the bed, seeing his naked body with bandages and violet spots, when he touched them he felt more pain.

The door opened

-Y/n!-he heard an angelic voice, then he felt hands in his chest and how he was slowly being lay down to the bed again-you need to rest! stop trying to escape for once

-trying? i always escaped before you watched me again-he said smiling

-yeah well, you look worse now, you took longer to wake up-the male said, his long black hair being tied up while he looked at him.

-Hyunjin, i can't stay-

-but you can! you are safer in here, you have food, a room, warm water-he sighed-why do you always have to go and keep stealing?

Hyunjin turn away, looking for the food he brought in for him, bring in it more closer.

-my dad didn't like this style of living, you know that-he was interrupted by a biscuit in his mouth

-you say that every-fucking-time, im tired of that you know?-he started cutting the food, knowing that Y/n couldn't move his own arms-i...i miss having you here, being with you

-stop-

Hyungjin felt your hands in his own, but didn't try to look

-you know, even if you are the one with power, they would kill you the moment they see you with me, if not for the gender is gonna be for who i am-

-i told you we could escape-

-i don't want you to live like me-

-but you just said!-Hyunjin shouted, but stopped, noticing how close you both were.

-i know...but we just can't, we aren't made for each other-Y/N ate a little bit more, and then stand up.

-you don't even kiss me anymore-Hyunjin looked at him-why? you can't even do that? you can't give me that satisfaction?

-if i do it, im afraid i won't be able to go-

-Then do it-Hyunjin got closer to you-kiss me, stay here, no one has to know, it can be our secret-

-if i stay, i could love you, but you would have to be with some lady to not make it that obvious, to have that heritage your father oh so wants-you looked at him-one way or the other we can't be happy

Silence took place, Hyunjin trying to think in another way while Y/N was suprised he didn't escaped yet.

-Just for this day, please-Hyunjin pleaded, holding your hands

-if i go tomorrow, its gonna be worse for you-

-just...-he sighed-let me have this joy for one day, let me imagine that we live in a world where you didn't have to live like this for some code, a world we are not gonna be hated for our love, a world were i can wake up and have you on my side-

-it's just gonna be a dream, love-

-well, let me dream-he kissed him

and you accept it

── ⋅⋅⋅ ────꒰ ୨ ♡ ୧ ꒱───────

You were both kids when you met eatch other, he escaped from his castle with tears in his eyes and you found him, you hugged him while saying that "pretty people should not cry!" and made him laugh.

You played like kids, he remebers how he got all dirty, his white clothes being a big contrast with the dirt and your own clothes, in his eyes you were a free spirit that liked to do anything, he loved that form you, didn't even care that you were a boy.

After he came back from outside (not before a kiss in the cheeck as a goodbye from you) he told everything to his parents, his dad said he was just a kid and no boys could have such feelings, that he was just confused. When he cried to his mother and while she was hugging him, she told him "love is different for everyone, if you like that boy, then i guess is okay"

He escaped almost all days from the castle to look at you, to find you, it looked like everytime he find you, you changed a little bit more.

So, after some years, when you both stopped being kids and he knew everything you did, he said everything, his feelings, his worries, everything. All under the moon and stars.

You kissed him that day, you hugged him and said the same to him, but also saying the one thing he already knew.

"in a world like this, all we can wish is just gonna be a dream Hyunjin"

"then, let me sleep and dream it"

── ⋅⋅⋅ ────꒰ ୨ ♡ ୧ ꒱───────

Hyunjin woke up the next day, feeling the slight pain in his hips, and he touched his neck that was full of love marks, he smiled and then looked beside him, hoping to see you.

But the bed was to cold.

Your warmt wasn't even there, his smile dissapeard and then he looked the window, seeing it all open. He looked at the room, not seeing anytrace from you.

Then he looked at the little paper that was in the pillow beside him, were your head rested.

"i love you"

He laughed, he laughed and hide his face with his hands, slowly feeling the tears appearing and his laughs turning into sobbs while.

He just woke up from his dream after all.

── ⋅⋅⋅ ────꒰ ୨ ♡ ୧ ꒱───────

[bitchslapblastoids]

Can I ask how much you talk to your partner about Dan and Phil and how do you talk about them? As someone who is not/has not been in a serious relationship, I find it hard to imagine how I would talk to someone about this, given my level of obsession. I don’t even really talk to friends about it. Like, do you talk about fic? Do you show your partner their videos? How did/will you bring up Iceland?

You don’t have to answer this if it’s too personal- totally get it! I’m honestly just so curious when I see phannies talk about their partners who aren’t also phannies.

Hi I actually really love this question bc it’s def something I think about fairly often, bc the tension is real. I am openly thirsting over these men, I have a real life partner, I share a life with him, but I also spend like a third of my life online thinking about the lives of these two dudes….it’s a thing. Just a heads up, my answer got really long.

My partner pretty fundamentally doesn’t get Dan and Phil’s whole thing, so I don’t show him vids or talk much about specific goings-on in the d&p landscape, bc it’s just a bummer to try and articulate or share something knowing it ain’t gonna land, lol. Even trying to explain the tour each time I came home from it all giddy made me feel like language was a hindrance and an impossible barrier to surmount. It’s just so hard to explain d&p’s brilliance when you don’t have some basis of common knowledge to draw on. It’s also hard to make someone else get the inherent appeal of two people’s chemistry and connection if they aren’t inclined to gaf about that kind of thing.

But he does know pretty much the full extent of my whole thing going on here lol. He’s seen my blog, sometimes I show him a post if I’m particularly proud of it/think it’s especially funny, I’ll talk to him about mutuals I’m chatting with sometimes or things happening on here that are specific to and exciting for me…basically I’m deeply uncool about it all. And yeah he knows about my fic (he hasn’t read any and I hope to god he never will, but i talk to him about broad strokes of plot in my longer fics, and he knows i write smut as well). I’m around him all the time when im writing so it’d be a pretty massive thing to hide, plus the process of writing/publishing Bowl of Oranges and its reception was sooooooo meaningful and giddying for me, so it was kind of all I could talk about for a bit there. He was/is wonderfully supportive and is happy that I’m writing and putting stuff out there.

i talked to him about Iceland the other week when i was close to impulse buying a ticket after the tysons shows, and he was down! If i follow through with booking a flight and hotel, he would come (not to TIT just to Iceland) and we’d just make a mini trip out of it. He’s used to me spending dumb amounts on concerts and we’re still fairly independent with our finances, so the money stuff isn’t an issue.

We’ve known each other for so so so long so he really understands my obsessive personality. We’re both quite strange and atypical in our own ways and I think have learned how to grow around eachother’s oddities and be patient and curious with one another rather than judgmental.

There are times I worry about my screen time and that I’m becoming too entrenched in fandom world at the expense of physical world, and i think at times I can neglect nurturing my relationship with him/all kinds of other components of life, bc the dopamine of phannie tumblr is a powerful fucking drug. So i try and be mindful of that. Definitely something im still working on.

To be completely honest about another tricky thing - I have definitely gotten stuck in a comparison trap before, of wishing that my connection and communication with my partner was as inherently easy and joyful and silly and immediate and Dan and Phil’s seems to be. My partner and I have many different interests, so while there are tons of things we connect over, there are also tons of things we can’t really share in the joy of experiencing with one another, and sometimes I’ve held Dan and Phil up as this paragon of love in comparison, feeling salty that I didn’t have what they have. I’ve gotten over that though, bc it’s definitely on the harmful side of parasocial; we only see some of their time and lives and they obviously have differences and disagreements too, and differences are good. And to be frank, will I ever have what they have? Of course not. I do think it’s pretty remarkable and special and I think most people in life won’t. And that’s ok because I also feel deeply fortunate to be with the person I’m with and I choose him year after year.

To touch on an elephant in the room - telling him I write smut fic was the thing I put off the longest bc I was scared/embarassed/felt kind of guilty about it all. And then I did and it was literally so fine. Idk, he’s great and I’m very lucky. I do have to be rly mindful of how the fantasy of it can impact my sexual desire. I spend a fair amount of time thinking about Dan and Phil’s life and relationship and, let’s be honest, sex life, and so shaking myself out of that and remembering to be embodied in myself and my relationship and my sexual partner can be a challenge. This feels weird and pretty vulnerable to talk about on here bc it kind of lays bare how you really can’t just compartmentalize this shit to one tidy section of your time and brain. but I can’t imagine other people don’t also find themselves in a similar position.

In sum, I do have a hard time with balance in life, and this is all something i think I’ll always be working on finding better balance with. But it’s not hurting anyone, it’s not rly hurting me, and it’s brought a lot of joy and creativity and connection to my life, so I try not to be hard on myself about it! I’m also deeply fortunate to have a partner who gets me and accepts me and is wholly nonjudgmental.

I’d rather die than anyone else in my life see this blog though. I have a couple friends who know I write fic and have a tumblr, but only the ones who I know are also into fandoms of their own and therefore get it. I’d reeeeeeally rather die than anyone I know irl see my ao3 that’d truly be the end. 🙃🙃🙃

Ok thank you for the question clearly I have a lot to say!!!!!

[b4rk1ng-l0t]

Mandela Worldbuilding Shit I'd like everyone to consider

Preschool teachers watching their class size dwindle down until there's only a few kids left

Parents trying to explain to their child whats going on in the world, unable to even comprehend it themselves

Children growing up not knowing they're an alternate Adam and ESPECIALLY Sarah

Going to school and all of a sudden, your best friend stops showing up

Having a long distance friendships/relationship with someone in Mandela and theyre telling you all the wack ass shit going on there

People being too scared to leave their house, meaning their too scared to work-- empty and shut down businesses everywhere you look like theme parks, stadiums, restaurants, etc

The light traffic due to the lack of people there and leaving their house

Going to work because you need the money with the possibility something will follow you home

Stray dogs/other pets roaming the streets because their owner was replaced or died

Dogs/pets licking their owner's hand or face, knowing something is wrong with them, but unable to comprehend that they're dead

Dogs biting the absolute shit out of one and they let out a cartoonish "YEEEOUCHHHH" like take that Cesar :)

911 calls made by children whose parents suddenly disappeared or died Thatcher

Alternates disguising as kids (or regular people) calling 911 to lore in officers Jude

I've said this before and I'll gladly say it again- how do we know that population count consists of ONLY humans? It could be so much lower than it actually it

Being high on hallucinogens and seeing The Fucker Man In The Corner Jonah

Everyone who thought that excessive prayer would help Mark

Everyone who thought "oh it'll just last a few months, everything will be fine ^_^ "

Becoming numb to messages like "Where's our savior now?" graffitied on a building and scrubbing them off without second though

Skyrocking prices for antidepressants and therapy, but no one can afford them because no one can work

Laying in your bed/going on about your day until you suddenly hear a gunshot

Priests and other religious figures contracting MAD and questioning their faith

The entirety of Skinamarink could take place in Mandela. Imagine an alternate fucking with a child just like that, and the alternate taking joy in their fear. No one would be able to stop it.

TMC OUTSIDE OF CHRISTIANITY/ABRAHAMIC RELIGIONS! PAGANISM! JUDAISM! LUCIFERIANISM! ANYTHING! PLS GUYS IM BEGGING YOU DO IT OR I WILL BRING IN MY OCS👺👺👺

Kids going to live with someone else because their parent is dead.

Adoption centers being a heavy target for alternates

"My mom's dead." becomes a common response to 'yo mama' jokes😔

TMC OTP/Brotp/etc Ideas

Couples helping each other shave/do make up because they can't use the mirror

Sharing a bed because you're scared

"Call me when you're home"

Coming up with a code word so you know it's actually them

The overwhelming joy when they confirm *its actually them*

Moving in with someone for safety reasons

Traveling in pairs

(Last Updated: May 30, 2024)

[polaroidbills]

something great.

"i want you here with me. like how i pictured it. so i don't have to keep imagining."

genre! - angsty, fluff too, mega slice of life

paring! -non-idol!beomgyu x fem!reader

synopsis! - these days, love is always glorified in movies and books. but it's not always like that. sometimes it can be amazing and instant. other times, love can be damaging and complicated. but is it ever too much to ask for something great? - inspired by something great by one direction -

warnings! - not proof read, kiss (kinda), teeny tiny swearing (lmk if i missed anything)

word count! - 1 572

author's note! - first little imagine after my hiatus!! this is literally me rn (minus the dream part). he literally has a bird too and he doesn't play basketball but hockey. anyway hope you enjoyed!

i've always been into romantic-comedies. whether it's books, movies, or shows. they're my favourite. they allow me to get away from reality and slip into my imaginary world. a world so great, filled with love and joy. it's like an over powered hide and seek spot.

but sometimes i get fooled. sometimes the love shown through these films and novels aren't real. love in reality is never how they are in the movies.

boys don't fly across the world to see you. boys don't put on a musical performance as a way to apologize. boys don't join the drama club just because you did.

i just wished he did.

choi beomgyu is his name. he's been my crush since kindergarten. i'm im grade 8 now. soon i'll be graduating into high school. he doesn't know. he's never known. and i don't plan on letting him know. how could i?

he charming, funny, caring, and so much more. the way he rakes his hands through his hair, the way his laugh is contagious to everyone around him, the way he can always lighten up the mood, the way he isn't only socially successful but academically successful, and the way just his presence is comforting.

my feelings for him never leave. even if i try my best to force them out, even if he's dating someone else, even if we go on summer break. they never leave.

it's now friday, 10 days before graduation. i sit myself next to him because my teacher changed the seating arrangement.

"hey y/n!" his cheerful voices rings through my ears.

"morning beomgyu!" i respond.

"did you do the math homework?"

"i did yeah. you?"

"uh nope," he scratches his head.

we often have these small conversations. just short and casual. just a hi and hello. usually it would end here. i guess not this time.

"haha do you need help with it?" i ask.

"actually yeah. i don't really get it," an embarrassed look plays on his face.

"you know, i could help. i don't really mind."

"really? you would do that?"

"of course, i have nothing else to do anyway."

"okay sure! how about after school? i have to carpool with soobin and yunjin though, if that's okay with you?"

soobin, beomgyu, yunjin, and more of my classmates live on the same street. so they often carpool together.

yunjin is one of my best friends. she's one of the only one's that know about my crush. but ut weirds her out because she has like a sibling relationship with beomgyu.

"sure let me just text my parents!"

"great!"

and just like that i have plans. plans with him. i know it's just studying, but it's something? i mean, i can barely look him in the eye, let alone help him with math.

the school day goes by in a blur. i can't get my mind off of what's happening after school.

its 3:15, 15 minutes before school ends. i go to the bathroom to freshen up a little, bringing my emergency bag. in which holds a hair brush, mascara, blush, bronzer, highlighter, and a lip gloss.

i go back into class, as everyone starts packing their backpacks, getting ready to leave. i too get ready to leave.

3:27, 3 minutes until the bell. we're already lined up waiting.

"hey y/n!" soobin call my name. i walk over to them.

"you're coming with us?" soobin asks.

"yeah, is that okay?"

"for sure we have an extra seat anyway."

"okay cool," i smile.

the bell rings and we walk out into the parking lot.

"hey mom! um y/n is riding with us, is that okay?" soobin asks his mother.

"of course! come on in sweetie!"

beomgyu gets in first onto the far left seat.

"sorry y/n, you're in the middle," beomgyu says, as they already have assigned seats.

"thats fine," i climb into the middle and soobin gets in too, closing the door.

the drive is quiet, with only the low radio playing. but uts a short drive.

i've never been this close to beomgyu. it's quite awkward but also comfortable in a way.

the car halts and we climb out of the car, walking over to beomgyu's house.

"i'm home!" he unlocks the door. and his mom hurries to the door.

"hi y/n! come in, come in," his mom smiles.

as we walk in, i notice the lovely furniture and layout of the home.

"you have a very nice home mrs. choi!"

"thank you! but please call me diana."

"okay mom stop mingling, let's go upstairs," beomgyu interrupts. and we make our way up.

i notice all of the family and chcildhood photos on the walls and tables. cute.

"no funny business!"

beomgyu rolls his eyes and shuts his bedroom door.

"okay so where should we start?" i ask.

"well i couldn't really understand question 1?"

"okay we'll start there," we set down our books on the foors and start studying.

a couple hours later, dinner is called. we walk downstairs to a neatly setted table and the smell of delicious food.

i sit next to beomgyu and diana serves the food.

"thank you! this looks delicious."

"of course! cooked a special dinner for a special day!"

"mom!" beomgyu makes a weird look to his mom.

"oops- anyway, y/n what wer eyou guys studying up there?"

"oh beomgyu needed help on some math."

the dinner goes by really well. i feel like diana and i have a connection, as we were talking the whole time.

we go back upstairs to continue our work.

"hey don't you have a bird?" i ask him.

"yeah, his name is toto."

"can i see him?"

"sure but be careful, he isn't good around new people."

we go into the birds room and there's toto in his cage.

beomgyu slowly takes him out.

"here put your finger out, like this," he demonstrates the movement. and i follow. "toto up!"

toto moves onto my hand carefully.

"woah! toto's never good around new people! he must like you! toto kiss," he point to my cheek as toto places his beak on it.

it's a fun moment. laughter and smiles. this is why i like him.

he puts toto back into his cage and we go to his room.

"hey i'm tired of studying can't we stop now?" beomgyu says after a few more minutes of studying.

"yeah sure what do you wanna do?"

"hmm i don't know? we haven't really talked all lot, i wanna get to know you more."

"oh well what do you wanna know?"

"do you have any hobbies?"

"yeah, i love reading and watching movies and shows i guess?"

"oh cool what kind?"

"mainly rom-coms. what are your hobbies?"

"well i play basketball for one. i also really love music and playjng the guitar."

"oh cool i love music too! who's your favourite artist?"

"i love taylor swift and seventeen."

"me too!"

silence falls between us, but it's not awkward. i make eye contact with him – something i never do. the tension between us is strong and the space between us is small. i can slightly feel his breath on my skin. his eyes travel to my lips and back to my eyes, and the same thing goes for mine. his moves in closer, now the space is really small. i can definitely feel his breath on me. he moves in even closer.

"y/n?"

"yeah?"

"i really really like you, for soo long. i like you y/n."

"y/n! y/n! y/n! wake up! you're gonna be late for school!"

i awaken by the sound and nudging of my brother.

"what?"

"you're gonna be late come on!"

of course it was just a dream. it always is. just my stupid imagination and mind. he would never like me. his way out of my league. why would he even like me? there's so many other girls too.

my mind is occupied with these negative thoughts, untily brother yells once again.

i shake my head to brush the thoughts away and quickly get ready for school, walking straight out the door.

the whole walk to school my head is filled with these thoughts and reminders.

love isn't real. it never was. i was just to delusional and blind to know it. true love is just in the movies and books. those scenarios never exist in real life, only in fictional films and novels, of course. no matter how much i imagine and hope and dream, nothing will change. it's just something i ask and beg for.

but is it ever too much to want someone with me, like in the books and movies, like how i picture a true love is?

when will i be able to stop imagining?

why do i still have to keep imagining?

is it too much to ask for something great?

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