#im gonna write a full fic about this. just tired rn

[egg-but-with-style]

*knocks on your window like a salesperson.*

Soap, Gaz and ghost compare dick sizes in the shower room.

Soaps is like really fucking girthy, but shorter, around 4 inches. Both of them gasped when they saw it (ghost had already sucked it, but acted surprised)

Gaz has a lot of veins, like so many, and it's about 5.5 inches, but has a pretty curve.

Ghosts is of course massive, like 7 inches, and it's actually a bit skinny.

Then Price comes in during the dick measuring contest and tells them all that they don't even know how to make a woman cum with just their dick. Not like Price can.

Oh look it's you walking down the hallway, what could go wrong?

[stunie]

*rubs hands together* okay it's wakasa braindump time!!

i will get to the thirsts in a sec but let me just say (1) hard agree on mangakas showing the characters room i eat that shit up. second and third year rooms when!! (2) u saying that ur reading more about wakasa to understand his character is so cool of u. i feel like this sounds sarcastic BUT NO I ACTUALLY THINKS ITS COOL!!

ok anyways.

i have been mentally stuck on lazy sex + somno with wakasa FOREVER.

on the former: i feel like there's a good chance that you and wakasa spend half of your sundays in bed just drifting in and out of sleep, pressed up against each other and feeling each other up. only 20% of the time is spent actually fucking. wakasa uses you and then gets tired and just curls against you and falls asleep with his nose buried against your neck. or vice versa, you grind yourself down against him while he holds your hips so you can get better purchase, but by the time you're cumming his grip has gone slack from drowsiness and you're very soon to join him in dreamland. i also think mans is the type to not mind the sweat that comes from what the two of you are doing or your tangled limbs and that said sweat in fact gets him going. there have definitely been times where he's licked the sweat off the back of your neck while he has you in doggy.

on the latter: i feel like the "you use him" scenario above kinda lands in this bucket. to elaborate tho i think wakasa is into somno both ways but actually prefers /you/ using /him/ while he's asleep. i feel like the first time you did that was when you were both half-awake but he was exhausted, and you asked if you should leave off and continue later and thats when he told you that "no, i want you to keep going. even if i fall asleep. can you do that for me, baby? i think its hot." you should've figured because it's right up wakasa's other alley of "just use me, baby. wanna just watch you move." i also hc wakasa as being very sensitive so its a treat for you to just leave featherlight touches on his body — brushing your fingertips over or lightly pinching his thighs, rubbing the pads of your thumb over his nipples, leaving barely-there touches on his hips — and seeing how (quickly) he gets hard, even though he's still asleep.

when i said braindump above i was semi-joking but that actually ended up being the case whoops! thank you for bearing with me. if you have any thoughts about the above or about wakasa in general please do share

NONNIE. nonnie you match me. these r the long asks i need to fuel my incessant babbling. i love you for letting me read this <3 lemme add a read more right off the bat:

second and third years when INDEED. and where is SUO’S .

you are so sweet 🥹 i need to spend a longgg time on a lot of these characters bc there is a lot to take in!!

godddd spending the day drifting in & out of sleep w waka ? that’s so hot fuck 😭 licking the sweat in doggy? the fact that he wouldn’t mind the sweat / being all tangled in each other. the entire idea of like grinding against each half asleep, falling asleep, fucking… asleep again… that’s gotta be a full drabble idc i have to write that or it’ll never get out of my brain nonnie. i’ve never physically reacted this hard to a thirst but wtf … nonnie

“can you do that for me, baby?” FUUUCK. WHAT THE FUCK NONNIE. him being so sensitive that you can get him hard that easily in his sleep. i wish you could see my face rn after reading that holy shit.

well fuck. how am i gonna sleep knowing this information 😭 oh my god nonnie i’m actually speechless LALSKMSM u got me to shut up for once ???! 😭😭 umm yea yea ok so this is definitely turning into a drabble at the minimum and a fic at the max !! this was crazy im actually gonna go on my knees rn and thank you for sharing this with the class

[furymint]

2023 Creator Reflection

ffxiv.

1. dance me to the end of love

this one was fun! i always like merging a character's outfit with the bg so i liked doing that again. picking the colors for elliots outfit was also enjoyable. ive wanted to make smth w that cover for a while

2. shame was still the tyrant of his life

i only wrote two nol and eli things this year and neither of them are finished. the first was a continuation of a scene where nol kisses elliot against the blue stained glass in his room--i once posted it but then i deleted it bc it made me feel woozy for its allusions to sex. i wanted to rebuild it and take a shot at it now that im comfortable writing n reading sex, but i never got very far. theres actually lots of nice parts! i just like nols dumb angsting the best!

3. valentine

i really wanted to focus on nol's eye here, but also not make it too obvious lol. i used a ps filter like a schmuck but i wanted it to be darker without making it even more difficult to see, so i took away their bodies and limited the colors to make it what it is.

4. amateur cracksmen

the second nol n eli wip, which doesnt have many interesting lines rn, was a raffles-inspired story where eli drags nol as his valet to a rival artist's house and tries to steal back the brooch that he bought from an underground dealer feat. much babbling abt the state of societal responsibility that war is supposed to bring

ffxvi.

1. herz an herz dir

i wrote some reflections about this one already here. i honestly was very (distressed voice) cant believe im writing pure fanfic for the first time in over ten years and lacked a lot of direction when i started bc uhhhhh terence has 8 and a half mins of screen time. i tried to convince myself that it's not much different than me stealing brucemont for my own evil devices, but the unique perspective of seeing quite so much fan content def influenced my interpretation. i wanted their relationship to be much more imbalanced from the get-go initially--dion using his power unintentionally and terence barely passing a thought abt it until later bc he's just so accustomed to obeying--but i ended up giving terence a lot more sway & ammunition in their argument. the breakfast bed thing is also smth im rly fond of.

2. mund an mund

there's also additional meta for this one here. i made a silly doodle abt it also. dion kept picking fights here! it honestly turned out how i expected. when i first started this fic, i was gonna have dion start out right in oriflamme and meet ter and kihel there, but i booted them to northreach so i could have this stretch of conflict. i think it's like. Bad Pacing. technically. if i still believe the conflict introduced in the next chapter is the core one, that is. which i sorrrrta do. but i dont care bc i rly like the visual of kihel laying in dion's lap and getting to put a gun on the wall w ahmed.

3. eines atems

its been two months since the last chapter and this chapter is humiliatingly not written. i have all my scrambled notes and scenes that i jotted down in between the first two chapters, so i have a full direction, but it's been really difficult to write lately. ive been devoting all my time to trying to recoup my mental health and work on my teredio secret santa. ill start next year with this wip as a priority, so for now i only have the photoshop edit for it. kihel is holding terence's hand--it's his pov turn.

overall i didnt like this year very much. i didn't read, create, research or do a lot even though i tried to. i became really disconnected from all of my friends bc im too tired to stay for rp or hold online conversations. at this point, i dont play ffxiv at all except the few times i managed to rp a little. i moved into nanny's house and have my own space, but don't have the presence of mind to do anything about my pc, books, and so on, although i did make a lot of progress rewrapping my books w fresh wraps and some other things. my plans for next year are to reach out to a couple of my friends, build my pc, relearn + rebuild + relaunch my queer lit blog on open source code, survive school, and rediscover the productivity ive lost the past few years.

teredio has helped me a LOT to find community, inspiration, and art in my loneliest year yet. im very proud of my fic and grateful every day to the ppl who have reached out to me about liking it. even if im sorry about my productivity rate in comparison to how many extraordinary writers there are in the ship's fandom, i know i have to be easy on myself to relearn how to write, create a writing schedule that works for me, and stop punishing myself when i cant get the words out.

past reflections:  2017 | 2018 | 2019 | 2020 | 2021 | 2022

[lqfiles]

BROOO JAEMIN GET BEHIND ME I WILL FIGHT ANYONE FOR YOU AND YOUR CAT (even tho my dog wont let me bc she doesn’t like the smell of other animals on me 😔 BUT I’LL TRY)

also thank you for the new update 😋🫶🏼 EVERYONE SAY THANK YOU BEFORE I CRAWL OUT UNDER YOUR BEDS WITH A MASK ON IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT 😋😋😋

and yesss there are gendered words in Spanish for example “la foto” (the picture) is feminine “la mano” (the hand) is feminine, “el programa” (the program) is masculine, “el planeta” (the planet) is masculine. so the word “la” leans more towards femininity. for example: “la mujer” (the woman). “el” leans more towards masculinity. for example: “el hombre” (the man)

(also, its not easy for me to explain it 😭 but again, I’m here if it’s confusing 🫡)

and about my writingggg, i just started the series, im writing another piece of writing, im finishing one, and i just came up with another… my brain doesn’t stop 😭 that’s why i spend my time readinggg (also i read these two other books this week and so good)

but AGAIN i will literally take haechan in a fist fight i can do it guys swear! I throw hands (no I don’t) and I can do it (no I can’t) AND I GOT THIS (i’ll leave it you guys)

- 🫧

(also bella just posed for me on my digital camera and she looks like a doll/stuffed animal 😭 I guess that tired her bc she’s sleeping rn)

me fr because i’m the biggest cat person and jaemin has the cutest cats fr, anyways yasss that’s gonna be it for now i’ll try and make some of the new chaps soon 😝

its not confusing i surprisingly understand it, so if someone were to type something and started it with la you would be able to immediately tell they’re a woman? or am i wrong..

OH YOURE BUSYYY plsss how are you gonna handle all that at the same time 😭 have you decided what you’re gonna focus on? and maybe give us a little sneak peak 👀 the way i came up with a new fic idea too, WERE JUST SO FULL OF CREATIVITY!!

LMFAOOOOOO EXACTLY I (most non confrontational person ever) will beat his ease if he doesn’t stop (i would never lay a hand on a person cos i’m too scared) he better watch it 😒

ALSO OMGGG YOU JAVE A DIGITAL CAMERA?? i’ve been wanting one for ages, i feel like taking pictures on those just hits different, i bet the picture came out looking super duper cute aaweee, i was gonna say that you should show me but idk if you can even send digital camera pics to your phone or anything like that

[storiesofsvu]

it's thursday bitches

spoilers under the cut

Okay, I was organizing fic and writing shit for the first two hours so I couldn’t live react BUT:

That ep of Mothership was phenomenal. Good job team.

Barely paid attention to Toronto, I can’t get on board yet.

Now it’s SVU time.

“happy hunting” ewww… puke in my mouth, that’s disgusting.

Girl WHAT THE FUCK. I don’t care if you JUST met someone at a hostel that night, you don’t fucking leave them alone in a bar when they’re visibly really drunk and with two guys all over her, come on.

Okay, I’m starting a Velasco line tally: 1

OOOO a full scene! Look at our boy go!

Okay yeah he is finally getting some screen time

These boy may not be the actual perps in this situation, but there is no doubting they’re pieces of shit.

This is gonna be one of those cases with the last minute twist that the other girl is the actual perp, right? That’s why there’s no dna?

I don’t like this squad. I understand rollins not coming back/kelli not wanting to come back (hello, she just had a baby, and would you want to go back to a workplace you were fired from full time?) but I will forever be salty about them getting rid of muncy and churlish, they FIT with the squad, they worked through their issues and worked well together. It was refreshing to have the younger generation coming in and being mentored by liv, fin and Bruno. I like the fbi girl, she’s a great actress, but the vibe isn’t the same.

Ohhhh I forgot about the other guy from the beginning lol

Okay but I DO love three powerful older women interrogating pathetic young twenty something boys

LOOOL and this dynamic of good cop bad cop between Bruno and joe?! LOVE IT.

Bruno is fucking killing me rn, this is hilarious. Prime television.

The fact that there is still another hour of television after this? I’m TIRED. And like..grey’s starts soon too so that’s gonna fuck me up.

This episode has fully sold me on wanting Bruno to destroy me. Sir. Pls.

Something that fell into your lap?! Liv…baby… you wanted to take in every abandoned kid at svu over the past 25 years. You were the mom calvin deserved, you wanted to adopt, you have ALWAYS wanted kids/to be a mother, its been part of her character arc literally the entire time the show was on air. Yes, technically noah kinda fell into her lap, but the way it was addressed here did not seem right lol.

Okay, that episode was actually super good compared to the last few weeks!

Don’t trust this captain at ALL. but like, I don’t think we’re supposed to LOL.

“I don’t know… im not his mother.. thank GOD” lol… we love Jet.

I miss bell…is she gonna pop up at some point? We need her sass/banter

The fact that she went out to do this super nice thing by replacing the flowers for jet cause she let her stay with her and THAT’S when she was attacked. Fuck this. Ugh.

The fact that they’re going through so much effort to block the face/voice of this killer means that we know who they are already, right?

BUT also… if the captain hadn’t called jet specifically to get Elliot to his fucking iab appointment she would have been home and able to protect the girl… so like… im still super sus of her

All of these crusty old white men all look alike and I cannot tell the difference between them. Is it the cap’s dad? Brother? Husband? Random poker night connection?

DIVORCE???!!!! I DID NOT SEE THAT COMING.

…okay but now they could be together somewhere down the road? Like.. they really did bomb us with that ship so I haven’t had time to decide if I like it or not but we’ll see how things go.

Okay so the brother AND the dad are both in on it? Maybe the cap isn’t actually sus and will be blindsided?

Meh, that ep wasn’t that good tonight tbh but two outta our aint bad!

[liathgray]

OH MY GODS HAPPY BIRBDAYYY CONGRATS ON LIVING ANOTHER YEAR

Ooookay I hope yall dont mind that I’m just gonna do one big ol post for everyone else because as LOVELY and SWEET as you all are answering all of them individually is a touch draining.

I super appreciate all the kind words and bday wished yall are so nice and ILY!!!!

Thank you for the congratulations on being born (a mighty feat, I know) and for surviving a whole year. Also cherrydydhehdis YES YOU CAN DO THAT IN ASKS LMAO

[goldenempyrean]

Can you do something with the prompts “Woah... Why is the room spinning” and “My head feels funny” with sick!natasha

Her like falling asleep during a important meeting cause she’s sick but won’t admit it to anyone

Plans And A Patient

Hey! This fic isnt too long but I tried to stretch it out, hopefully its good enough for you :) Im finally feeling better after being practically knocked out for the week so Im back to writing again. I tried to grammar check this but honestly im too tired rn so excuse any spelling/grammar errors

Summary: Nat’s not feeling too great during a meeting, but its just some sniffles, right?

Wordcount:973

░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░░

In your mind you had the perfect job. You were able to help people and thats all that you cared about, however there was a slightly less fun aspect of your career that you utterly despised… Meetings.

It wasn't just you who disliked meetings. Your girlfriend Natasha was also not too keen on them. The whole sitting down and talking thing really wasn't her style, she much preferred to be out in the field, beating some agent's ass for information.

Thats why when you and Natasha were called in for an urgent meeting, you couldn't help but groan. You felt especially bad for Nat, she’d recently gotten back from a mission and she’d seemed to pick up a rather miserable cold and it had finally hit her in full-force that morning, making her feel absolutely horrible. You tried your best to get both yourself and Nat an excuse to miss the meeting but unfortunately your efforts were futile.

You couldn’t help but feel sorry for Nat as she quietly sat down in the seat beside you, trying to silently sniffle against her finger.

“You gonna be alright?” You whispered quietly, taking advantage of the loud sound of chairs scraping as everybody seated themselves around the large meeting table

“I’ll be fine.” Nat replied in a less then assuring voice, her voice shaking as she spoke.

Over the course of the next hour, you couldn’t help but feel your worry grow as Natasha rubbed at her temples continuously. You sighed as you watched her stifle a series of painful looking sneezes into near silence. Luckily for her, only you had seemed to noticed and you placed a hand on her thigh, silently blessing her. Natasha seemed to understand what you meant as she looked up to flash you a small smile.

The room grew loud as the team discussed potential plans on capturing hydra agents so you took the opportunity to lean over towards Nat and ask, “How you feeling?”

“My head feels funny.” Nat admitted quietly with a sniffle, rubbing the sleeve of her leather jacket against her nose.

“That cant feel nice.” You tutted, discreetly leaning back in your chair to grab the box of tissues from the small table behind you, placing it on her lap – sneakily out of view from the rest of the team.

“Thank- Hh’gnnxt!” Natasha’s sentence was interrupted by her twitching nose, making her head bob bob downwards with a sneeze louder then she would’ve liked.

“Bless you.” You hummed, moving the strands of hair which had fallen back behind her ear before turning to try and concentrate on what Tony was saying.

In all honesty you weren’t really paying attention at all. All you could focus on was Natasha’s state of health. You’d noticed that she had begun to repeatedly swipe tissues and attempt to quietly blow her nose though her efforts seemed fruitless.

The meeting only seemed to drone on as the team got into disputes over correct techniques. You were trying your best to participate and voice your opinion but you couldn’t help but grow endlessly bored. It was in your bored state that you had let your eyes wonder, searching the room for some form of entertainment. In your search, yours eyes glanced over at Natasha… Poor baby. You hadn’t noticed it until now but she was resting with her head in her hands, her eyes closed as small stuffy snores escaped her slightly open mouth.

“Natty.” You gently nudged her shoulder, pulling her from her sleep.

You’d tried to not bring attention to her but Tony had witnessed the whole thing and didn’t seem very impressed, “Am I interrupting something?” He spoke firmly, staring at the both of you.

“No.” You repressed your groan, Tony’s usually bright personality could easily be shifted when he wasn’t being listened to. You knew more then anybody that he didn’t like to he interrupted.

Nat opened her mouth to speak but instead a series of damp coughs left her, forcing her to muffle her head into her elbow. You reached out and ran your hand down her back, rubbing circles down her spine.

“Natasha?” Tony’s once asserted voice had become smaller, it now held the same worried tone as your own.

“I’m fine.” She sniffled once she’d recomposed herself. Earning herself a sideways glance from yourself only your eyes turned soft as you saw her nose begin to twitch as she looked up towards the light, “Hhuh’tsss! Hh-Hh’hehtsoo!”

The group blessed her as Natasha rested her head against your shoulder, sniffling as you swiped afew of the tissues from the box which was still sat on her lap. “You should use these.” You whispered, pressing them into her hand just as her breath before to hitch.

“HuhS’CHIEW!”

“Y/N, Nat.” Tony grabbed your attention as the pair of you turned to look at him, “You’re both dismissed from this meeting.”

You nodded silently mouthing a thank-you as you stood from your chair. Nat slowly pushed herself up from her seat only she stumbled backwards into you as she stood.

“Woah- Why’s the room spinning.” Nat mumbled against your neck, her burning skin connecting with yours. You sighed, wrapping your hands around her waist, pulling her from the meeting room and out into the hallway.

“Baby, your burning up. Your on fire, why didn’t you tell me you had a fever.” You muttered, guiding her to the elevator at the end of the hall.

“I didn’t want to worry you.” She sighed tiredly, yawning against her palm

“Sweetie when it comes to your health, always tell me if somethings wrong.” You kissed the back of her neck, causing her to shiver a little, “Lets get you back up into our room and into bed.”

Natasha let herself smile as the doors to the elevator opened, “That sounds nice.”

[wh0rephobic]

OMG CAN I JUST SAY ALL YOUR FICS GET MY PUSSY ECHOLOCATING ITS NOT EVEN A JOKE </3 besides that i have a thought i want to share with you. if you write on it or not that’s completely up to you sweetheart i just cant stop thinking about it myself and had to share,,,

warnings: f!reader, pregnancy, lil bit of pervert willy, lactation kink(?), implied pregnancy sex at the end

william who cant get enough of his pretty little wife with her soft and full tits and the swell of her belly that grows a bit bigger each day with his kid inside<33 the thoughts he gets while working drive him insane. your perfect little body working so hard to carry his child and you who works so hard but it’s tiring and even after sweeping the house you’re panting with a hand on your lower back to support yourself. you’re gonna be a pretty mommy soon and it makes him go feral and he cant stop himself from being a pervert about it. suggesting with a small smile to help lift your swelling tummy for you when it brings you pain some days, doing it so he can get a perfect view of your rosy cheeks from working too hard and your cleavage that shows the top of your mounds that are so full. he wants to just squeeze, pull and suck on them and watch you come undone. you’re so sensitive to any type of touch and it’s impossible to resist fucking your perfect pussy when you ask him with frustrated tears in your eyes, lips pulled into a pout while you stare at him. and william can never deny his pretty wife<3 — @kadssp

kady im punching air rn OMF

pervy william loving his pregnant wife holy shit

you’re carrying his kid that you and him made and you’re doing so well with it ughhfhtgt it makes him lose his mind watching you struggle and become so desperate and helpless with such easy tasks, but don’t worry he’s right there to help you. he loves watching your body change over nine months to bear his child, he makes up all of these excuses to get to see or touch your pregnant body (most of which go right over your head, but not all) and let me say the pregnancy sex is like no other. he loves everything so much that when you finally give birth and it’s all over he’s so quick to kiss you back into bed and whisper “let’s do it again, let’s make another”

but also i love ur works so hearing that u like mine is making me LOSE IT MY GOD

[serowotonin]

˗ˏˋ 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘀𝗮𝘄 𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘀 ˎˊ˗

𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗿𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗲𝗿 ` sakusa kiyoomi ` 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘁 ` 1.2k ` 𝗴𝗲𝗻𝗿𝗲 ` pure crack ` 𝗳𝗼𝗿𝗺𝗮𝘁 ` hcs `

𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲 ` umm idk what this is.. lowkey based off real events? midnight ramblings? yeah that kind of thing i guess... also big thank you to @kaguol​  for giving this a read (⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄) `

it was sports day at your school and most of the events were over and done with but the teachers didnt allow anyone to leave yet cuz,,,, reasons✨

which is why some of the students kinda just flocked to the gym to chill and maybe play around

that was until somebody suggested they host an unofficial, volleyball game

the net was still up nobody bothered to put it down so yeaahhh

rules of the game were simple: there were none, except keep the ball in the air and get it over the net…however you can

at first only a few ppl played… the “energetic” and “athletic” ones and it still seemed like a typical volleyball game

then more ppl started joining

and it slowly started getting more chaotic

it got to the point where the entire gym was the court

there were ppl running around chasing the ball, others just hitting it as hard as they can in practically any direction, then there were those who just stood there cuz everyone else was standing there so why not ??

now sakusa didn’t want to be there

he was tired because his class had signed him up for ALL the running events

why? well cuz he was tHe OnLy AtHLeCtiC PeRsOn in his class

utter bullshit btw

he plays volleyball hes not a runner

but still ended up winning tons of races just cuz… it was him💅✨ no explanation needed

n e wayss he was tired and wanted nothing more than to go home and take a nice long shower

but ofc the students of itachiyama wouldn’t let him

some of them dragged him into the game early on

again, because he was aThLeTiC ~

but this time they actually got the sport right lolol

honestly he was lowkey annoyed at how un-volleyball the game started to become but continued playing it anyway

it was hilarious how the others tried to receive even his weakest, half-assed spikes

sakusa always made sure to aim his spikes directly at ppl’s arms tho

not out of consideration for their pride or anything no no 

it was cuz whenever the ball touched the ground the ENTIRE gym groaned rlly loud and there’d be ppl going “NOOOOOOOO” 

and that annoyed tf out of him so he was nice with his spikes

then there was you

you were outside with one of your friends when the whole volleyball thing started and only came to the gym cuz the rest of your friends were in there

so you walked in, scanned the crowd, immediately noticed your crush *cough*sakusa*cough* and then found your friends standing in a group on the other side of the gym

now here’s the thing

sakusa has a crush™️ on you too. took him a while to realize and accept it but he did and now he officially has a crush on you

he just hadn’t really gotten around to the idea of asking you out or anything

mainly cuz he just very recently realized his feelings aka last night he was thinking about all the events he had to do for sports day and he groaned cuz ppl made him do it but then he realized ppl wasn’t actually ppl it was just you

you were the one who smiled at him and said “why not sakkun,, it’d be fun” and like that he agreed. then he realized further he actually thought about you a lot. like earlier he was thinking about how’d you look tmr since u weren’t gonna be in normal school uniform and you’d have your hair all done. and then he realized he was looking forward to seeing you which led him to realize you were one of the few ppl he actually enjoyed being around. THEN he fucking finally realized “oh… i have a crush…. on y/n……. oh”

somewhat conflicted abt it for the entirety of the day,,, bois experiencing feels for u ofc its gonna take some time >.<

he didn’t get to talk to you all day though,,,,,, he was busy with his own events and you were elsewhere

either way,, when he saw you walking past in the gym he kind of lost focus

lost focus in that the ball was coming to him and he jumped to spike it but only had his eyes on you causing his aim to mess up and well,,

he hit his target

*your head*

and because he wasn’t focused, it wasn’t a “soft” spike like all the other ones hes been doing 

it was a full-blown sakusa kiyoomi spike

that hit your face

(;´༎ຶٹ༎ຶ`)

sakusa just went: ᶠᵘᶜᵏ

you saw stars,,,,,,,, and fell on ur bum

like a split second later, you heard a calm voice asking if you were ok. you muttered out a yeah and felt arms helping you up

one of them was your friend you were pretty sure, but the other one’s hands were too big to be any of your friends’

“let’s get you to the nurse,” the calm voice said again. 

“mkay,, thats probably.. a smart choice.. yeah….” and, vision still blurry, you were guided to the nurse by your friend and someone whose identity you weren’t sure of yet

sakusa was still standing there

all that, the spike hitting you, you falling, your being escorted to the clinic,,,,, that happened in like 2 seconds

he didn’t even have time to say anything yet

to make matters worse, some random ass guy was the one who came and swept you out of the gym

sure your friend was with you but to sakusa,,, that guy sus af

after they left, the game continued and sakusa rlly didn’t feel like playing anymore

he wanted to make sure you were okay and wanted to apologize 

however,,,, the teachers came in shortly after and told them it was time for the closing ceremony

throughout the entire thing, his eyes flit through the crowds looking for you

he couldn’t find you tho>:((

big sad

after the ceremony was over,, he went to the clinic but you weren’t there

then he just kinda,,, /slump/

figured he’d just pull you aside tmr and apologize then

except,,, tmr came and he still hadnt found a good time to pull you aside for a proper apology?? 

you were just so… busy.?

finally,, at around lunch after you finished eating, you kinda just sat with your friends and were talking and stuff when sakusa decided now would be an appropriate time to apologize

he walked up to you and asked if you two could talk in private for a bit

your friends shot glances at each other. he saw,, but he didnt let it bother him

anyways,, he led you out into the hall and in the softest tone he could manage he says, “about yesterday… i’m really sorry, spiked the ball a bit too hard.. how are you feeling?”

you tell him ur fine,, just that it aches a bit but nothing serious

he nods and mutters another ‘sorry..’

then this happened:

“no it’s ok you don’t have to be so sorry. accidents happen.”

“it wasn’t an accident tho..? so im sorry, it wont happen again.”

“yeah ok,, wAIT WHAT?? wdym not an accident?!?? u spiked the ball into my face on purpose?!?!!?!?”

“WHAT NO- ofc not. i just,,, i kind of lost focus… on other things… at the time… and yeah”

“????”

*sighs* “i was focused on you when you walked past and didn’t consciously control my aim or whatever and ended up spiking it into your face”

“?!?!?!??…. why were you focused on me??”

“cuz i like you dummy” /it slipped he didnt mean to say this/

“oh.... wAIT WHAT?!?!?!?!?!?!?”

and that is the story of how sakusa confessed

𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲 ` honestly think it would be better as a fic but uh,,, my lazy ass cant be bothered to write fics rn so uh,, hope this was good for now? lol might mess around and write one later tho.. maybe `

[hallowed-wings]

hallo! :D i'm gonna send 8 in two separate asks and u two can divide them up however you'd like (sorry if that's too many askdfjaksf) - for this one, 1, 2, 7, 8

[ helloooo this is ashes here!! we've split it up so we each take one set of four and then nab questions we want from the others set too. this is also my second go at answering this because the first draft didn't save :'] ]

[ 1 ] Tell us about your current project(s)  – what’s it about, how’s progress, what do you love most about it?

so i'm legally required to have several things cooking up at once /lh so I have a bunch of stuff on the backburners (very far back but in my defense it's exam season and i'm tired) such as a character/location study 5+1 things style (though im unsure if it is an actual 5+1 or just like. several segments with the same theme) on l'manhole, a desert duo 5+1 from grians pov (actually a 5+1 this time I swear) and a fic from when eret rescued michael whilst hannah george and sapnap played bedwars, due to a devastating (/pos) tiktok I saw, and a few other things! but they likely won't be my focus atm 😔☝️✨

my main project rn is the love of my life, my hadestown 3L (/LL/a touch of Empires ish) au!!! Jimmy is Orpheus. Scott is Eurydice. it's a tragedy. Cleo and Etho are Persephone and Hades and their relationship is a mess. aaaalllll that good stuff to come!! can't spoil too much. it's full of emotions, full of stuff I can't speak about tooooo much in case of spoilers but I've been working very hard on it!! the whole plan is written (though I keep adding more and more and more) and I've started writing chapter one! so it's very much in the works and I'M personally very much excited :]

[ 2 ] Tell us about what you’re most looking forward to writing – in your current project, or a future project

there's twists and metaphors in my hadestown au (gods above it needs a name) that i'm super excited for and trying very much not to spoil!! but im very excited for hadestown!lizzie in particular, and more cleo content is always good :]!! hadestown!cleo is very lovely to me she means the world To Me. but yeah i love a good extended metaphor or twist, the sort that makes me feel VERY INTELLIGENT for put it there; i've run all these particular ones past riser to make him go MMMMM so i hope that bodes well 👀

[ 7 ] What do you think are the characteristics of your personal writing style? Would others agree?

i would say personally that my works are all very emotionally driven!!! not necessarily on purpose but almost every work boils down to a feeling or handful of feelings at its core. hadestown au is about love, my c!eret michael rescue fic is about grief and redemption, and so on! I also love metaphors. just so much. many metaphors all the time this isn't flowery writing this is a whole botanical garden!!!

i asked a few people and yeah I'd say they agree. riser says im very smart (true and so based /lh)!! but seriously no riser says i sometimes have lines that just bang severely ( i.e this, circa blue christmas. — Ghostbur’s thoughts tumble from his mouth the same way smoke drifts off from him; curling and aimless. ) and that i clearly understand structure and am brilliantly linguistically etc etc, another friend said that my writing was "quiet in the best way possible" "mature ; me and my husband + its sigh" and very cathartic, which I think is all pretty cool!

[ 8 ] Is what you like to write the same as what you like to read?

right see- the answer here is yes and no? because i'd say yes in terms of dynamic/characters, if i really like a dynamic/character i'll seek out their content and im more likely to probably write them, although that's! not always true! i wouldn't say i read a lot of puffy and niki content, but i have them featured in my l'manhole 5+1 things (which is going to be called my little versailles btw, from sufjan steven's fourth of july. very good song very sad </3), and i don't think i've ever written 4/4 sbi and yet i read Rather A Lot Of It??

but also. I grew up on high fantasy, and I still love it, i crave nothing more than complicated aus in settings fresher than the first lamb of spring (SEE IT IS to t; passerine) but can I be arsed to plan that thoroughly myself? no! i am simply cramming it in my mouth as fast as i can. ALSO READ A LOT OF WINGFIC AND DONT WRITE IT but I gotta write more about winged characters... do I know anything about birds? no I just. I like them.

gods above that was a rambly answer -

bonus thievin': [ 9 ] Are you more of a drabble or a longfic kind of writer? Pantser or plotter? Do you wish you were the other?

i'm definitely a drabbler! i've never finished a longfic... ever... started Many but never finished them as much as i want to, with one semi-notable exception that still only exists in 4 and a half notebooks and needs to be typed up. i'm more of a pantser in general (which i LOATHE i wish i was more planned out), i tend to try and strike while the inspiration iron is hot (and boy oh boy is it a quickly cooling thing), but i'm trying to plan more. i find 5+1's the easiest to plan for because its so neatly chunked down, fun fact!! and my hadestown au has a whole plan and im very very proud of said plan :] so hopefully that will break the mould of unfinished longfics!

—

there u go! hope that wasn't too wordy/long/ rambly :] enjoy and thanks so much for the ask !

[radiorenjun]

Grand announcement ❗❗❗

Yep you read that right and no this is not a joke, unfortunately.

Honestly is it that much of a surprise?

Um I don't know when I'm actually going to post this or if I will post this considering I've been debating on whether i should actually take time off of not. But depending on the date I post this, its either going to be one of two reasons or both.

LETS GO WITH THE POSITIVE ONE FIRST SHALL WE?

First of all, Happy Ramadan! My maids going back to her old village for the holidays so I'm going to have to assist my parents in babysitting more til she gets back. Therefore I will be too busy to post or update. Or maybe my parents plan an unexpected vacation or something and I'll be too busy to communicate with anyone on my phone.

Edit: I take it back my mom fired her when she caught some cigarette ashes in her room today (my maid went back to her village yesterday btw) and now we gonna get a temporary one that comes and goes everyday at the end of Ramadan LMFAOOO more chores for me then

Also, im posting this to just inform everyone I'll be okay and I'll return somewhere in the end of May or the beginning of June considering I promised a few moots to voice call then. Man, it feels weird speaking all serious like this. It feels even weirder that I'm not even using capslock lmfao.

Okay the other reason. Im not really thrilled to think that it's finally drove me up so far i have to take a break from everything.

If you can't tell from how I've been on and off lately uh like my mental health is getting bad. Like really really bad?

I won't go into much details but for safety stuff here's your trigger warning for ED, SH, Depression, Nightmares, etc. If you don't want to read this part you can scroll down until you see some random red statement I'll write later so you can see what I have to say before i leave.

Uh okay where do I start. To sum it all up basically, my mental health is in absolute ruins? At the moment?? Uh... It's been the worst it has been in the past three to four years? I don't know anymore. I can't sleep properly because I keep having nightmares of past su1c1d3 attempts and the outcome of actually succeeding. I can't eat properly anymore. My SH habits and my anxiety is coming back (every beginning of every month though so it wasn't as bad as way way when this started) and I trying my best to stop it again. I'm almost a month clean but I doubt that I can last more than that again because everything seems to get worse and worse. I cry myself to sleep because of my thoughts being so fucked up. I tried coming forward with this so many times to my parents and my teachers but they won't believe me, i can't do anything anymore except try to get better by myself. I can't bring myself to communicate with anyone anymore knowing full well that the only thing that's keeping me alive at this moment is socializing. I keep having flashbacks of when older men stalked me everywhere I went in the past. I lie awake knowing that nothing can bring me comfort except seeing that one idol who you all probably know by now. Im literally depending on him to keep me together during the day it's not even funny anymore lmfao.

I have to do endless chores, deal with all of this at once, catch up on two semesters worth of materials for my new school, deal with my graduation ceremony which is coming around this month or next month? Somehow I developed some type of anger issues the past year so haha that's great yuh no.

To stop you from worrying, no, I don't have suicidal tendencies anymore but I don't exactly have something to be thrilled living for. I'm just vibin in life at this point lmao

I'm just tired. I'm really really tired. Id lie awake crying my eyes out while listening to renjun voice audios. I'm tired of crying all the time and I'm tired of everything. Im tired of laying in bed overthinking and stressing bout things that wouldnt normally bother as much. I promise I won't do anything stupid

I won't be gone long. I'm not okay at the moment but I will be. Because at the end i need to be okay again. I'm giving myself time to heal again before something gets bad. I promise I'll come back from time to time. I promise I'll be okay again and I'll come back as that happy hyper renjun simp who swears and uses capslock, spamming memes or whatever.

I'm not comfortable opening up about anything that goes beyond too sad in my life so I'm just going to leave it at that

You can stop scrolling now. The triggering part is over.

Thank you for all the moots who decided to cheer me up unknowingly whenever I was having a mental breakdown. Thank you for reading up to here lmfao uh I don't know what to say? God Im a mess.

Dms on both tumblr and discord will be pretty slow. I'm sorry but I'll reply to my asks like a day or two after they're sent. I won't be posting much until June and I'm truly sorry for those who were waiting for the last chapter of idni, im taking this chance to also rethink the ending so I can somehow make it better than I originally planned it literally a year ago.

Damn broken English 101.

As I said before, I'll be okay when I get back. I'll be the happy hyper angie I always was and always will be when I return. I don't know when I'll post this but hopefully I don't haha. You don't have to be worried about me, this happened before and I always come back okay again. I'll be okay, I promise. I'll be back in a month.

Do what yall do and don't forget to tag me whenever you post any renjun fics haha. I'll miss you all, don't forget about me okay? Haha.

I'll be looking forward to writing again and hopefully I'll be mentally and physically healthy then. Hopefully I'll have my motivation in writing back again by then. I'll try my best to commit into getting better and being happy. Plus I wanna start an sm au but rn it doesn't seem very likely haha

I'll be contacting my networks bout this as soon as I post this.

Thank you and see you all later

[yikesharringrove]

the fic you wrote for my last prompt was amazing, ty 😭 can you do 50 + 56 this time please? and if you want to work in dyslexic!steve too that would be awesome! 🥰

You are speaking my fuckin’ language, dyslexic Steve is my ABSOLUTE jam. Honestly, whenever I write Steve, he’s dyslexic, although sometimes it’s not mentioned because it’s not important to Harry’s journey @ jk rowling

Thank you for your request! I’m really glad you liked the other one I wrote! You’re anonymous so I don’t know which one that is but I really enjoyed writing them all! Sorry for my manic energy rn.

Something a little different, it’s modern au! This is probably nothing like what you were thinking so I’m sorry, but I kinda love it ngl.

50: Secret Admirer

56: “I don’t know if I should be flattered or offended.”

Prompt list!

Billy spent three and a half hours reading through every single tweet on the account.

There were so fucking many of them. The earliest one was timestamped from four days ago, so obviously, this person had no life outside of tweeting.

Tweeting about Billy.

He had a few personal favorites. He had retweeted them to his account, figuring may as well play it up, make a joke outta everything.

@ImHardForHargrove: sorry WHOMST gave you the RIGHT to have eyes that fuckin blue im YELLING

@ImHardForHargrove: watchin u play basketball is a religious experience y are ur arms so BIG hhnnnng

And Billy’s absolute favorite, which he pinned right at the top of his account

@ImHardForHargrove: ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass

Billy knew he looked good. Knew he turned heads wherever he went. He did that on purpose. But realizing someone at Hawkins High had set up a thirst account for him, well.

“I don’t know if I should be flattered or offended.” Billy had explained the situation to Robin, letting her go through the account on his phone. “Like, It’s kinda nice, whoever this guy is, he’s got a crush. But also like, It’s kinda creepy. Plus he’s objectifying me,” Billy was talking through his sandwich.

Robin made a face of disgust. “Why do you keep saying ‘he’? All of the girls in this fucking school are practically drooling for you.”

“Hard for Hargrove, Robin. I know you’re like, revolted by the peen and whatever but that does not excuse a lack of basic sexual education and anatomy.” She gagged at him. Honest to God, gagged. He thought she was gonna spew all over the table.

“If I ever hear you call it a peen ever again, it’s on sight Hargrove.” Heather plopped herself down next to Robin, kissing her cheek before zeroing in on Billy’s phone, still in Robin’s hand.

“Have you guys worked out who it could be yet?” Her eyes were wide at Billy.

“Billy says he thinks its a guy even though people with penises aren’t necessarily men.” Robin gave him a pointed look.

“Yeah Robin, I know that, but, I don’t know I just think it’s a guy penis-having person.”

Heather narrowed her eyes at him. “Do you actually think that, or are you just hoping in that goblin little brain of yours that this account is Steve Harrington’s.” Billy could feel the heat spread down his neck.

“Billy, I know Steve is like, the only out guy in this whole fucking town, but you can do way better than him.  PLUS, I feel like it makes more sense if the person running this account wasn’t out and had to channel their gay yearning through social media.”

“First of all Robin, you have this vendetta against Steve that I don’t get. He’s a nice guy. He’s kinda dopey, kinda dumb, but he’s like, sweet and shit. Second, I’m not out, so it still could be him because he doesn’t think I would, like, accept his advances or whatever. Hence, gay internet yearning.” The chime of the bell sent them packing their lunches, Billy’s phone vibrated in Robin’s hand. She rolled her eyes when he realized he turned on notifications for the account

“Get a fucking life you loser.” She slapped the phone into his hand. He opened the new tweet with embarrassing zeal.

@ImHardForHargrove: i saw u talking with ur mouth full and it was yucky but i was still  🥺🥺

His head shot up, trying to see who would have been facing him during lunch, but the cafeteria was almost empty.

The rest of the week Billy took deliberate care of every interaction he had with anyone. Observing who was in his surroundings, and making note of everything he did and said. He took extra caution around Steve, wanting to spot any minute detail that could give away who ran the account.

The account started blowing up. People were retweeting like fucking crazy. Everywhere he went, he was being asked if he’s seen it, like he doesn’t regularly retweet the good ones. The search for the owner of the account had spread throughout the whole school. A few girls even tried to claim the account was theirs, but every time that happened the account would tweet out something to discredit whoever made the claim, proving them a liar.

Billy was starting to lose hope it was Harrington. The tweets were coming at all different times, posted whenever the person thought about it, so Billy was losing track of who was near when he said or did something. And the tweets were always about stupid stuff Billy didn’t register doing. On Wednesday night the account said

@ImHardForHargrove: hi when you chew on your pencil and it makes me 🥴 that is all thx for comin to my ted talk

Friday afternoon gave them all:

@ImHardForHargrove: walked past ur classroom and u were asleep ive never wanted to CUDDLE someone so bad in my LIFE

But Saturday, Saturday renewed all hope for Harrington Billy could possibly have. Lauren Kranz was throwing a party. It was the first real rager in a while, so everyone was there, and everyone was sloshed. Everyone but Billy, who’d agreed to be designated driver for Robin and Heather like some kinda idiot.

He was brooding on the back porch when his phone went off. The account was active, and the owner was drunk.

@ImHardForHargrove: I can seeeeee u oyt the windw I wan u 2 FUC ME. RAW DOG.

@ImHardForHargrove: srry ur so beauitiful nd THICCC

@ImHardForHargrove: I wana shoot my shot but idk if u lik bois

@ImHardForHargrove: (ys i am boi)

@ImHardForHargrove: nd i dont wana get my heart broken agin 😥

He was right about it being a guy. He was right about him being too nervous to approach him outright. His brain was screaming stevestevesteve at him. Hawkins was shook when Steve came out as bisexual in his sophomore year. He was the golden boy, a real jock. He was NOT the kind of guy people would assume queer in a small midwestern town.

He was kind of a douchebag, dumping one girl for another, sleeping with her and never calling again. But then he settled down with this guy from the University of Indianapolis for a few months until Steve caught him cheating. Apparently, he had slashed the guy’s tires. Billy was impressed.

The next year came Wheeler, who only stuck around long enough to make sure Steve was nice and whipped before she fucked off on him too. So Steve retreated. Spent more time with middle schoolers than anybody else. Didn’t want to put his heart on the line anymore until he knew it wouldn’t be stomped on.  Billy could respect that.

Billy couldn’t risk being out in a town like Hawkins. Word always had a way of getting right back to his dad, and in a tiny hick town with nothing better to do than gossip, it was usually only a matter of hours before Neil heard something he didn’t like.

@ImHardForHargrove: srry 4 bad typing rn. drunk nd dysl exic ren’t a happy combo

Billy’s heart stopped. The drunken idiot was giving himself away. Maybe if he sat here staring at the account long enough, enough would be revealed he could figure it all out like a shitty drunk episode of Blue’s Clues.

He was so focused on Twitter, refreshing his feed, again and again, he didn’t notice a very drunk, and very unsteady Steve Harrington stumbling out the back door towards him. Until he crashed into his back.

“Sorry, Bill!” Billy had Steve by the shoulders trying to keep him upright. “Heyy I have a question for you.” Steve grabbed one of Billy’s hands and veered over to the table and chairs arranged neatly on the small patio. When they were sitting, Steve kept ahold of Billy’s hand.

“Hi.” Steve was smiling like a little kid. Billy was in fucking love.

“hey, Harrington. What was your question.”

“So-oo. I have this friend. A very good friend. Super close. And he has a big ol’ crush on you but he’s too scared to ask you himself because he keeps getting his heart fuckin’ broken so he wanted me to ask. Are you into guys?” It’s a miracle Billy understood any of that, every word blending into the next.

“That depends.” Billy leaned in, running his tongue along his bottom lip. He saw Steve take in a sharp breath, following the movement with his glazed eyes. He knew Steve was talking about himself, he just wanted to rile him up a little. Make him blush first. “This friend you’re talkin’ about. He’s our age? Like you’re not trying to set me up with one a’ your kids, right?” Steve physically recoiled.

“NO, you fuckin’ pedo. I’m NOT trying to set you up with a fuckin’, fuckin’ middle schooler. My friend is, uh eighteen. He’s a senior.” Unless Tommy fuckin’ H. suddenly had a penchant for dick Billy didn’t know about, Steve was 100% talking about himself.

“Well, if he’s as pretty as you are, I’d love to go out with him sometime.” Billy winked. Steve went red.

“Okay, but like, does that mean you’d go out with me? Like I’m as pretty as me, right? Because I was talking about me. Not ‘a friend’ I was talking about me. Steve.”

“Yeah, I kinda figured that out. You know, I was hoping it was you running that Twitter. Any time you’d tweet out something you wanted to do with me, I was always picturin’ doing it with you, Baby.” Billy was practically purring. “Especially all the shit you wanted me to do TO you.” Steve gave something between a whine and a groan and flopped himself onto Billy’s lap, straddling him with very little grace.

“Thank God. ‘Cause you’re so fucking hot I’d let you do anything to me. Anything, Bill.” Billy smiled softly at him.

“Then let me take you home. Let me put you in bed to sleep off all this. And let me take you to breakfast tomorrow. Something nice and greasy for your hangover tummy.” Steve was a puddle in Billy’s lap. “C’mon, Drunky, git your ass up.” Steve just giggled and muttered Drunky Skunky under his breath.

Billy sighed and stood up, hefting Steve up with him.

“Bil-ly,” Steve whined. “You’re so strong, this is so fucking hot. I gotta tweet about this.”

“Tweet it later, Sweet Thing.”

It took Billy for-fucking-ever to find Robin and Heather (they were making out in the basement with the stoners). But Steve chirped and cooed into his ear, so happy Billy could lift him and hold him like it was nothing.

The last tweet from the account was timestamped from Sunday evening.

@ImHardForHargrove: Hi this is Steve. Billy’s my boyfriend now 🥰#ThirstWorks

[gottlem]

summer fl(in)g. gigi/crystal

a/n i made crystal sad about 3/4 through and im SORRY i was projecting. anyways theres a tiny tiny bit of angst but MOST of this is just dumb gays in l*ve. im still getting used to writing fics so be nice pls !!!! also if u want a pt2 be sure to let me know!

summary: lockdown in summer can be lonely, but Crystal and Gigi make sure they never feel alone. thank god they have good service. (3.8k words)

When lockdown was announced, Crystal wasn’t surprised. The pandemic was taking the world by storm and yeah, it fucking terrified her. But she had to look on the bright side. So that's what she did. Just as the announcement came to an end, Crystal’s phone pinged from her pocket and she smiled to see her friends' names light up on the screen.

JANtastic: well its official

miss cox: Yeah I’m gonna miss u guys!!!

goodegirl: you say that as if u won’t be spending lockdown with jan. i’ll be ALONE thanks for asking

CRYstal: hey i’ll be alone too !!! I’ll text u everyday to keep u company :-))

goodegirl: i’m gonna hold u up to that

And Gigi did hold her up to that. The country was two days into lockdown when Crystal received her first message.

goodegirl: ugh we are how many days into lockdown? And ive already had A MILLION people hit me up with “hows quarantine treating u ;)” i am SICK.

When Crystal read the text, an odd feeling bubbled in her stomach. She told herself it was because she wasn’t used to out-of-the-blue messages from Gigi yet, they just didn’t talk that much, but looking back she admits there was probably (definitely) more to it than that. Of course the girls had already been friends, but Crystal had never found it in herself to speak to Gigi that much because, well, she was intimidatingly gorgeous. They got on well in groups, where Crystal could try to focus her attention on someone who didn’t make her face red every time she looked at her, but she knew if she invited Gigi out by themselves, she would make a fool of herself. It was stupid really, it wasn’t even like she had feelings for her - she was just too pretty, and Crystal didn’t know how to handle herself around someone who looked like they belonged in a vogue magazine. A ping shook her from her thoughts.

goodegirl: like i get that ppl are thirsty rn. i get it. i am too. but is that really the BEST they can come up with?

Crystal needed to reply. But what could she even say to that?

CRYstal: at least u have people trying to hit you up ://

goodegirl: omg what??? ur telling me not ONE person has tried to slide into those dms? they need to get on that! ur a catch

Crystal felt her face flush at the comment. Did Gigi really think she was a catch? Or maybe she’s just being nice? That was probably it. Just friendly banter. 

CRYstal: nope haha! ANYWAYS. hows quarantine treating u ;-)

goodegirl: very funny. bitch.

From then on, the texts flowed easily between the two and Crystal started to ask herself why she hadn’t done this earlier. So what if Gigi was offensively attractive? They clicked so easily - Gigi was smart, quick witted, and didn’t take anything too seriously. So really, she was Crystal's perfect match. As a friend. Platonically. That night, they texted until Crystal was struggling to even keep her eyes open. It was a conversation that felt natural to them, bringing up anything that came into their heads and letting eachother start stupid tangents without fear of judgement. Gigi found Crystal's ability to ramble on about any random subject impossibly endearing, but she wouldn’t admit that out loud. Not yet, anyways.

--

After three days of almost constant texting, Crystal facetimed Gigi for the first time. She picked up within seconds with wide eyes and a grin on her face. 

“Hey you” If Crystal couldn’t see her smile (which she absolutely could) then she could definitely hear it. Gigi’s voice was soft and she hadn’t realised how much she missed it until she was reminded of it. The best thing was that Gigi sounded genuinely happy to speak to Crystal, it made her ecstatic. Crystal had called in the late afternoon, just before the sun had started to set, so she could see golden light shining gently onto Gigi’s features. It left her speechless for a second. How many times was Gigi going to leave her completely unable to reply by merely talking to her? This girl was going to be the death of her. When Crystal finally came to, she managed out a soft, but casual, reply, hoping that she had covered up the embarrassing amount of time it took for her to speak. If Gigi noticed, she didn’t mention it. 

It took them a while to get into the rhythm of actually talking to each other - texts made it easy to think over before you send, and Gigi had never really been one to think before she spoke aloud anyway. She didn’t want to scare Crystal off with how blunt she could be, but after some awkward laughs and stuttered jokes, the pair slowly fell into a rhythm they felt surprisingly comfortable in; they bounced off each other's jokes and soon enough their cheeks hurt from smiling. A few hours into the call, Crystal was sitting comfortably on her bed, her phone propped up with pillows so she and Gigi could still see each other. She caught herself staring again. It started off as small glances that lingered a bit longer than they should, but it was easy to do that and quickly cover it up, especially on facetime. Soon enough, Crystal would completely daze off for minutes, just staring at the girl on her screen. She figured out she really liked looking at Gigi, and Gigi didn’t seem to mind.

Gigi thinks Crystal’s voice is her favourite sound. After about 5 minutes of hearing run on sentences about god knows what, she had already decided she could listen to her talk forever. About anything. She really didn’t care as long as it was Crystal and she was talking to her. As the call progressed into the late hours of the night, the pair had started to get giggly - the tiredness they were feeling was starting to take effect, but it made them anything but sleepy. At 11:56pm, Gigi decided Crystal’s laugh was her second favourite sound. She would sometimes giggle, sometimes she’d shake with silent laughter, but her favourite was when she gave into a full-belly laugh. The kind of laugh that substitutes for a full core workout. That was Gigi’s favourite. 

Crystal was obsessed with Gigi’s smile. It softened Gigi, showed a side of her that Crystal hadn’t been acquainted to previously, but she was so glad she knew now. Gigi could be harsh sometimes, she had learned this years ago and had just accepted it as who Gigi was, but after seeing that damn smile, it was hard to think that Gigi was even capable of hurting a fly. Crystal was quick to realise the mean girl facade (which had only made her scarier to talk to, and somehow more attractive) was just that - a facade. Walls she had built up. Crystal was eager to break them down, and she felt like she was making a good start everytime Gigi smiled like that.

They hung up when Gigi started yawning more than she was talking, she insisted it was just because she was tired, and Crystal wholeheartedly believed her. When Gigi’s face disappeared from her screen, Crystal was still smiling. Her cheeks hurt and she felt whole. She took a deep breath and took in the silence for a moment - she was alone again. She didn’t feel lonely. Despite her ever-growing fatigue, Crystal just couldn’t fall asleep, her head was buzzing with Gigi’s voice, and her laugh, and her smile, and her eyes, and- Crystal was in deep shit. She was all too familiar with the feeling of butterflies manifesting in her stomach, the thoughts of a particular person on her mind constantly. To be completely honest, she hated it. Falling for anyone had never ended well for her, and falling for someone she was already friends with? Even worse. There was no way this would end without somebody getting hurt, and that somebody would probably be Crystal. And yet, being stuck in isolation, she thought the idea of possibly having a girlfriend didn’t sound too bad, but that might have been the lack of human contact talking. 

Gigi let her thoughts wonder as she drifted off into sleep. She wasn’t one to get crushes, but when she fell, she fell hard. And willingly. There was just something about the drama of having such strong feelings for someone, and playing guessing games on how they felt. And by the way Crystal had been staring at her all night, Gigi felt like she was on the right tracks. She liked the way her cheeks would flush if she thought too hard about the girl, or how butterflies would dance around in her stomach, making her feel lighter than a feather. Maybe she was just a hopeless romantic, but she wouldn’t have it any other way. She allowed herself to dream up scenarios of herself and Crystal being together once this whole situation was over. She quite liked how it looked in her head. 

--

As the days passed, Gigi and Crystal found themselves spending more of their waking hours talking to each other over facetime than they did doing anything else. They were both falling quickly, only mildly aware of each other's adoration. It didn’t take very long for the casual flirting to start. Everytime Gigi gave an off-handed compliment about how Crystal sounded “really pretty today” or how her laugh is “the prettiest thing”, the other girl would turn bright red and freeze up. Gigi would tease her about it, which only made her more and more flustered. She thought she’d eventually get used to it, but she never did. Crystal tried to flirt back,really tried,  she wanted more than anything to make Gigi stumble over her words like she does to her so often, but she would always be completely unfazed by every compliment Crystal could think of. Crystal found her ability to keep her composure so easily both irritating and compelling. 

It took Crystal a few days to find something that would finally, finally break Gigi down. Pet names. When she had casually let ‘babe’ slip in the middle of a sentence, she could practically see the breath that got stuck in Gigi’s throat before she started to choke on nothing but air. When Crystal asked if she was ok, she answered with a question.

“Did you just call me babe?”

“Yeah. Is that a problem?” Crystal genuinely wanted to make sure that it was ok, but the comment came off as less of a question, and more as straight up flirting. 

“No. Nope. Not a problem at all. What were we talking about?”

Crystal doesn’t press further, taking pride in being able to make the girl so speechless, and continues what she was saying as if nothing had stopped her in the first place. She watched as Gigi’s blush died down very, very slowly, only to watch it burn up again every time Crystal repeated the pet name. She absolutely adored it. 

“You’re cute when you blush, babe” Gigi made a noise at this. Crystal made a note of that before deciding that this would never get old.

--

Soon enough, the girls were in a comfortable routine - talking every day until one of them would give in to sleep. It was usually Crystal. Gigi would stay on the call for a bit, just to listen to the girl’s breathing, it provided an unexpected comfort to her. Plus Crystal was adorable when she slept. The routine was broken one day about a month into the lockdown, though nobody was really paying attention to what day it was anyway. Gigi had been awake for no more than an hour when she started to miss Crystal, so she gave her a call. Crystal didn’t pick up. Gigi called again, just in case Crystal had her phone on silent, but she was met with no answer. Instead, she was sent a text, a text which really didn’t explain anything. At all.

CRYstal: hey !!! sorry can’t pick up rn but i promise u i will call in like an hour or two ???? speak to u soon love !!!! <3

It was unusual for Crystal to miss out on a call - she was usually the one to be ringing Gigi. What could she even be doing? Gigi needed a distraction, something to pass the time instead of sitting and waiting. That was when she realised she hadn’t worn any makeup in weeks, so she sat herself down and started on a full face - the process of doing her makeup always calmed her down, so it was a welcome distraction. Just as she finished, her phone began ringing. She didn’t have to check to see who it was. 

“Hi! Sorry I didn’t answer before I was kinda busy” Gigi was speechless. A pixelated Crystal was beaming at her from her phone screen. And she had green hair now. This is why she didn’t pick up? The bitch was dyeing her hair? It did look really pretty though. Like, really, really pretty.

“Quarantines really getting to you that much huh?” Gigi decided against gushing about Crystal’s new hair - that would be giving her what she wanted.

“Do you like it?” She loved it. Adored it. 

“It’s nice” 

“That’s all you’re going to say?”

“Needy are we?” That shut her up. She changed the topic in an instant. 

“So... you look really pretty today!”

That night, the girls fell back into their easy routine. It had been hours since she first saw it, but Gigi couldn’t keep her eyes off of Crystal and her new look. It really suited her. It just felt so utterly Crystal. The green haired girl was in the middle of a long rant about how One DIrection “are definitely planning a reunion really really soon” when Gigi had to stop her.

“I fucking love your hair, Crys” She blushed at the out-of-the-blue compliment.

“Really? I thought it was just nice?” Gigi shook her head.

“I was teasing, of course I love it. It suits you so much, you look beautiful” She was smiling ear to ear. Crystal loved it when Gigi gushed over her like this. It made her feel like there could be something there, like this was more than friends bored in quarantine.

“Thanks,” Crystal paused for just a moment before her face lit up “Oh my God, you should do something to your hair too!” Gigi hated that idea, and shook her head affectionately at the girl's adorable excitement. She felt slightly bad when she told her that she would be caught dead before doing anything to her hair - she loved the deep brown colour it had always been, and was happy with how the length framed her face. Crystal however, was incessant. Gigi was surprised when she found herself telling Crystal that she’d “think about” changing her hair up. 

Saying this was a huge mistake. Crystal reminded her every other hour that she had to dye it or cut it or just do something, and it drove Gigi insane. It took her all but two days to finally cave in - it irked her that Crystal had this much power over her. She wanted to do something shocking, something that would shut Crystal up about her damn hair for good. So she shaved it. 

She did it when Crystal fell asleep after a particularly heated debate about her hair (the second of the night) and Gigi hung up to get to work on it. To call it an impulse decision wasn’t perhaps the most accurate, seeing as though she had been bugged about it for a solid 48 hours, but waking up that morning, Gigi hadn’t expected that all her hair would be gone by the time she went to sleep. Once she had finally bitten the bullet, it took her an hour to admit that she actually kind of liked the look - plus it was fun to touch. 

When Crystal called her that morning, Gigi took a moment to herself before answering. She hadn’t told her about the change in her appearance and hoped she would like it, or at least be pleased that Gigi finally listened to her. She took a breath and picked up, feigning confidence with a casual “morning!”. She watched Crystal’s eyes go wide and her hands cover her mouth. Gigi acted oblivious.

“What's up? Is there someone behind me or something?” She looked at her screen and patiently waited until Crystal composed herself - she was used to her staring anyway. When Crystal finally spoke, she was practically squealing out a string of compliments. Apparently, she loved it. 

“Are you keeping it like that? Please say you’re keeping it like that, it's so hot” Gigi wasn’t sure if she would grow it out, but after Crystal had said that, it was an easy decision.

“I guess I’ll keep it then. Just for you”

--

Crystal loved being so open with Gigi, and she really appreciated how close they had gotten during lockdown - but she really just needed today off. She had woken up one morning with a feeling of dread that she couldn’t quite place, and a persistent headache. This was going to be a bad day, but she was used to bad days. She ignored Gigi’s calls and sent no follow up text. She could speak to Gigi later. Right now, she was just going to go back to sleep. 

So that's what she did. She woke up in the late afternoon and finally dragged herself out of bed to make some food in the evening. When she got back to the safety of her bed, she was still tired. And she kind of felt like crying. So she cried. Sometimes, especially on bad days, Crystal’s mind could get the best of her, she had learned to just let herself get all her feelings out when she got like this - bottling them up had only ever made them worse. This was when Gigi called for the millionth time that day, her texts had become concerned, then angry, then concerned again. Crystal felt like she owed an explanation, so with bloodshot eyes and a puffy red face, Crystal finally picked up.

“Ugh finally! You haven’t spoken to me all day I- what’s wrong?” Crystal felt a ping of guilt at Gigi’s initial response to her answering. Had she really kept her waiting all day? It felt silly, like an unreasonable excuse, but deep down Crystal knew what was good for her. She also didn’t know how to answer Gigi’s question. She was starting to regret picking up, having Gigi see her like this - god, she must have looked a mess.

“I’m sorry I shouldn’t have picked up. I'm probably bringing the mood down” She saw Gigi’s features become impossibly softer at that.

“Hey, no, it's ok. We don’t have to talk about it, but we can if you want to. But you’re not hanging up. And neither am I. If it means I sit in complete silence with you for the next few hours then so be it” 

This was when Crystal knew Gigi was a keeper. Whether whatever they had going on would continue, or whether they would return to strictly just friends, Gigi was someone she needed to keep in her life. They eventually started talking, first it was about how Gigi’s day went - Crystal didn’t feel like speaking much, but once she warmed up to seeing that all-familiar smile, she felt comfortable enough to start to open up. They talked for hours. Crystal cried. Gigi cried (though not as much). 

“I just wish I could be there to help, or at least give you a hug or something, god this sucks” Crystal saw this as an opportunity to lighten the mood.

“As if you would settle for just a hug” Crystal winked pitifully and Gigi laughed, but didn’t disagree. 

Of course one chat didn’t fix Crystal’s problems, but at least now she had someone in her corner - and that was half the battle.

--

It didn’t take the pair very long to fall back into their rhythm, feeling closer and more comfortable with each other, their feelings getting stronger as each day passed on. Crystal found herself falling back into the habit of sitting silent, and admiring the girl on her screen.

“You’re staring.” Gigi told her. Crystal hummened in agreement.

“You’re pretty”

It was normal for the pair to bounce words like pretty, and beautiful, and gorgeous between them. It was as if they both knew exactly how the other felt - like it was completely unspoken and yet so obvious. And maybe it was.

Two months into lockdown, Gigi was really starting to miss physical contact - she was starting to feel a thrill when she made eye contact with strangers on her way to her weekly shop, she was getting desperate. It was brought up with Crystal.

“I just miss human contact. I want to hold a hand. I want someone to hug me. I want a kiss! Oh my god I miss kissing.” Crystal felt herself blushing at the mention of kissing (kissing Gigi, nonetheless). She would give anything to see Gigi right now, to be close to her.

“When this is over, I’ll kiss you, don’t even worry about it” Crystal was only half joking. GIgi went red, but tried to act as if the thought of Crystal kissing her didn’t phase her at all.

“Oh will you now?”

“I’m not kidding”

“Well. I’d very much like that Miss Methyd” Gigi gave in, she refused to play hard to get with someone who she had fallen so hard for. She just hoped Crystal would stick to her word.

--

Summer was halfway through when lockdown was lifted. The instant the announcement was made, Crystal phone pinged - it wasJan, and she suddenly felt a wave of deja vu from when the lockdown started.

JANtastic: GUYSSSSSS i’ve missed you so much PLEASE say y’all are free to meet? Like right now?!?! 

JANtatsic: Jackie’s already with me so, she’s down too :))

CRYstal: i’ve missed you too !!! i’m free to meet!

goodegirl: me too !!

The group reunited within an hour, Crystal shed some happy tears, and Gigi laughed as she wiped them for her. It was nice to be with her, to be able to stand next to each other. But it also felt odd - like something had shifted now that they were right in front of each other. So for the rest of summer, the girls shared lingering glances and awkward smiles, too scared to make an official move.

[mieohmy]

jae!! i don't even stan the boyz, let alone read their fics but since you wrote it, i read it haha. also i always found sunwoo cute bc my friend likes the boyz and she biases him, but anyways, i'm telling you, i'm so glad i read this!! i've actually been meaning to read this for a while now too, just more of your fics in general but exams *cries*, but i need a break, so here i am since i ran out of jaemin fics to read. also!! when are you going to write a full fic for jaemin ahhh, i'm just gonna read for the other groups since i read through the nct masterlist already haha. also it’s been a while since I’ve been so engrossed in a fic omg... it’s so good jae!! i love how sunwoo mentioned to pay for the food and the reader was sold. also i noticed a theme, and i see you have a thing for melon and banana popsicles (me too tho) hehe. and omg when sunwoo offers to take the reader home instead of being on the ‘date’ with the girl he likes ahhhh *screams* the foreshadowing!! i loved how you can feel the feelings slowly develop from both parties (but they just don't quite realize it yet) and then the reader meets his mom aww, he really is so soft. and then when he realizes on the date, that you were the one he couldn't stop thinking about, i canttt, this was so good. i kinda resent the girl too for leading him on but ughhh what can i do... also! the pace at this story progressed was perfect and you write so elegantly!! the way you write is just my taste for fics in a way (fluffy but you feel the heartache at times; minimal angst that gets resolved at the end) ahh, but seriously i loved it so much!! i actually stayed up late to read this bc i had to know what happened in the end so i was too tired to leave a review then but i'm leaving it now hehe. i loved it a lot ahh, i don't even read any fics besides nct but since you're the author, i'm finding myself reading svt and the boyz fics haha. also i'm still curious... you had me thinking the reader's ex dated sunwoo's sister lol. i need to know, so you better respond to this, i need to know to sleep tonight grrr!! but anyways it's been a day and i'm still thinking about sunwoo haha (also about ceo wonwoo, if we're being honest here haha) until then, i'll be waiting for a jaemin full fic from you, this is a disgrace. (jk, ily, i just want more jaemin fics lol) <3 also i love how clever your ask box name is "ask mie" haha

oh my god lisa you don’t understand how much this means to me.

the fact that you don’t even stab tbz and still read one of my works for them just makes me wanna cry 😩 😖😖

i wrote the story not expecting people to care or pick up on all the small details i randomly added in but everything you noticed and said just makes me alsjksndksksmss aaaaa -im so sorry im just a jumble rn trying to process all the kind and amazing things you said-

and yes hehe you even noticed the sneaky interaction with sunwoo’s sister >< jendjdjd it’s really stupid but i answered it here (which is more in depth but not really) n e ways basically,,, sunwoo’s sister secretly dances and goes to the same dance place as the reader !

YA OH OEJDJDJ IK i don’t even have an actual fic for my ult 🤧🤧 i am a disgrace but i swear i just get too distracted with trying to get other works out first while also balancing the amount of fics i release for all the different groups i chose to write for EXCEPT *cough cough* i‘ve been writing a love triangle fic for a while and got sidetracked bc of school- but now i have time to finish it and release it super soon! ^^

(yes its jaemin x reader x **** and i got stopped right near the end at like 8k kendkdndn)

i also have a bunch more wips for nana trust me but im slowly getting the time to get to all do them (i promise there’s a lot and ill release them soon hopefully >:) )

ANYWAYS I APOLOGIZE FOR THE RANT

just know i will be thinking about this message and how kind you are for a longass time (thats a longass ride~)

i just can’t express how grateful i am for you and for writing this to me i just- 🥺🥺

thank you so much and i love you ❤️

[cxgvs]

hello its me

hmm idk why i wanna write something here tho yknow i think tumblr d worded to my same gen tumblr moots ...

anyway

maybe one day when i die, my friends & family will find my blog and just /know/ you know but lmao theyre probably just gonna find my yn fics hahaha

anywayyyy back to the real reason why i wanna write here...

i find it scary im having these kind of thoughts lately i dont know if its because of my job? (maybee? its actually the only reason i see rn?) bc honestly... im doing fine in all other things..

friends? theyre okay.. we talk and meet up if this lockdown permits (yup 2021 and still in lockdown)

family? we're good as well.. im happy theyre healthy and well (hope it continues like that for a long time)

me? well.... i guess the problem starts there lol idk i keep having these thoughts bout wanting not to wake up from sleep yk lmao and it actually stems from not wanting to go to work with the role that i currently have ....

maybe im being ungrateful rn but i really feel like its not healthy for me to be in this role.. its too pressuring, gives me anxiety.. and i know im only a month in but do you really have to be in a situation longer for you to say that its toxic for you? toxic for your mental health?

honeslty idk i feel kinda bad that im prioritizing my mental health over earning like putting myself first is something so bad lol i feel so guilty about feeling this way

and i feel that im unfair bc my family is working so hard in different countries, working their asses off, literally one have to caught the virus (theyre ok now tho) but still work

and im here,,, being a fucking baby,, whining about how THIS is the worst situation that i am in lmao

but they just dont get it,,, maybe i was mentally unstable right before all this happened (my job) and now its triggering these thoughts out of me and seriously i have never wanted to feel this way, i swear.. i didnt want to feel so broken,, so weak,,, i dont want to constantly ask for help,,, show signs that im emotionally & mentally drowning,,,, its just so hard to be living this way..

i didnt even realize that I'll go to such extent of wishing i dont wake up from my sleep

but at the same time, im fucking terrified this "life" will last longer you know?

you know how in books/universe beliefs that what you want to happen will be jinxed if you keep thinking about it lmao

im so so terrified about it like,, what if i really wanna die but end up living 100 more years lol

like bitch i dont wanna live so long if im this unhappy.. i dont want this life if im just constantly insecure about everything, how im literally fucking depressed and unhealthy..

and im so fucking sick hearing about "you can change this for yourself" "live life/change your life for you" "youre the driver of this life" bullshit like BRO DO YOU THINK I DONT KNOW THAT

Like ok man i KNOW i can change my life but at this fucking moment???? i cant???? and its difficult to just wake up one day and feel inspired and be full of energy in a mental state like this???

yall r so fucking stupid if you also think depression is being so skinny, eating less, looking stressed and fuck bc depression is also the opposite.. like honestly?? i dont fucking look depressed but look at me now tho?? haha

im overweight, i dont look sleep deprived, i still eat, and i still sleep.. im here but sometimes im not here you know?

whats worse is that depression here is being so downplayed like its just "drama"& not a real fucking disease,, i have relatives who would think - they've been thru worse and that YOU feeling sad and depressed for them is just whines and worthless drama and that youre just overreacting like you dont have a fucking right to feel that way just because theyve been thru "worst" lmao ok bitch do you want a fucking "not depressed" award

well fuck im sorry my generation have to deal with your fucking trauma bc you let it out on us just because we're younger and you dont have any idea that the shit youre putting us thru is actually YOUR trauma???? like fuck

sigh

im just so tired of this unhappiness.. i miss my old self,, the better me,,, i miss my passions,, the things that make me happy,,, bc right now, i can only do so much and still feel this way..

i can paint and sing all day but it wont bring me back the same energy, the same joy it brought to me before - and i miss that...

why do i have to be this way? i just wanna be happy..

[riskeith]

good morning love! (or afternoon for you hehe)

deku vs kacchan part 2 is my favorite ep of the entire series actually. i’ve watch that ep so many times as well it’s just perfect. i got into them when i watched that episode actually! the voice acting god..... literally shivers. now that i think about it it might even be my favorite anime ep of all time help. i just love how bakugou lets it all out and we get to see that side of him.. the insecure scared child he tries to hide. god i could ramble about it forever idk just love it. OH YOU WATCHED THE MOVE RIGHT AFTER? a scene with bakugou and todoroki is guaranteed a good time.. and they work so well together. haha that’s such a nice coincidence tho their dynamic is great in that movie even if it’s mostly kiribaku sjsksjk. what do you think about kiribaku btw?

RIGHT!!! at least we have a couple days to decide hihi.... paimon no longer emergency snack.. only seelie. 🥴 oooh? what kind of thing have you envisioned? (if you wanna share ofc!)

i’ve seen so many people mention that!! like one of the worst parts of the game is that in the higher level you get the less there are to do.. ssjksjdk at some point all you can do is grind domains and try to level up shdkdfhdj

LEVEL 40 INTO A LEVEL 70+ FIGHT ok that’s honestly hilariously brave doesn’t she like die right away 😔 oh yeah you’ll be leveling up Again soon *praying for you*... can’t believe they don’t keep the easy bosses anymore sjdkfh that’s so rude. this game is just grind grind grind. WE NEED A BENNY STORY SO BADLY. like imagine a story with him wanting to seek out diluc because he wants to learn how to fight from a master or something like that. i saw it in a comic and i can’t stop thinking about it 😭 all of them deserve stories!!! there’s so many ways they could make it happen pls mihoyo... chongyun x xingqiu story... <333

shfkjdskdjhf nope right now i’m playing with noelle as my main damage dealer, traveller, lisa and barbara actually. so i think i have a pretty good balance atm.. 2 long range 2 short range-ish. i usually trade out barbara for another character if i have to tho, hehe. that’s only combat though ^ benny is with me when we explore. mood is me having a 5 star and not even using her... i still need to think of ways qiqi could fit into the group yk. is your group still looking the same as before? ooooh if you could rank the elements what would your ranking look like?

172!!!!! that’s a bit short though when you said tall i thought like... 190 or something sjksjdxk. wait how tall are You?

oh i just meant like... people bashing others for spending too much money on the game vs those that bash people for not spending money and complaining that they don’t get 5 star etc? idk yt comments can be so ugly though so it’s a good thing that you don’t read them sjdjdjdkd

that’s super smart!!! you just follow along the plan and delete when you come to the part. must feel so satisfying too i imagine. haha, what little notes i have i put in the notes app and just check up on when i need to. sometimes i even forget they’re there shdkdhsks. my notes are filled with half-assed dialogue or random one words notes that don’t make any sense to me anymore.. nskdhddjdj

you’re right!! so you write at night? sometimes i just open docs on my phone and write a bit before i sleep and when i wake up it’s either a grammatical mess or just... super bad hskshd the brain is simply too tired to create anything shakespeareian

nooo i’ll def check these out and let you know what i think. i’ve seen halsey being in pretty much every klance playlist on spotify so i imagine she portrays their vibes pretty nicely. doesn’t she have a song she sings about being blue and red or something... shdjfhdj such a bad description but i see it being used in edits a lot. also now that i think of it melanie has a song called pacify her that i really like!! do you like it?

THATS SO CUTE YOU ARE A CRYBABY. 🥺 same here tbh i actually like crying sometimes... sjskdjdjd like you said it just feels nice to get it all out. i cry to almost movie or series or book i read i’m a super emotional person but i also think it adds to the experience? you feel more immersed in it that way.

RIGHT??? ITS SO BEAUTIFUL!!! and it’s our boys 😭 and they’re cuddling 😭 under the sun 😭 ssjdjdhdjdj 😭

can’t wait to hear from you again <3 yours, ma <3

good night! more like ahhah

:o!! that’s so legendary of them wow.. <33 and yeah honestly the voice acting is phenomenal.. and all the implications behind the fight too? bakugou finally opening up? midoriya understanding that what he needs is to fight him? ugh. kiribaku is fine! fhdsjfks my brain is so full of todobaku that any other ship is really just... in the background hfskjfs but i can appreciate the relationship they have! with kiri being the only one bakugou has really acknowledged and seeing as being on the same level, that iconic hand clasp when bakugou was being rescued... i have a kiribaku fic in my drafts but idk if i can ever get to it ahha. you like them a lot right?

ikkk also i didn’t know we had to wait until the very end to buy? i have more than enough to buy it rn but when i clicked it said ‘must explore area 14 first’ and i was just... bruh. AHAHAH. okay so in my mind it’s like.. chongyun at a funky angle we’re kinda looking up at him and his body is like bent down towards us fhsdkjs idk how to describe it but i can picture it very well but i also cannot put it to paper/screen. and then his clothes are just black instead of white! HAHAH. tho i kinda wanna see if i can draw a xiao first to offer up to the gacha gods hfsdjkfs (and if i can i’ll do a version w a dark outfit too for u hehe)

legitttt im literally just logging in and grinding the talent domains every day fhsdkjfhskfhjd there are some artifacts i want as well but the domain is literally SO difficult for me fuck.

i just go in and use her skill then heal a bit and switch right away fhsdkjfsd it going alright! and then i go ham with my other 3 charas and switch back to her to heal again fhskfjd. OMGGG that’s so cute please... i miss diluc too... come back!! i wish we had a way to replay the old quests even if we get nothing out of them like i just wanna experience it again ya know.

oooo! that’s pretty nice. hfskjd you could switch barbara out for qiqi! since she’s a healer as well. omg wait you have lumine right? so your combat team has no males? legendary 😩 we love fighting queens! ya! traveller, chongyun, xiangling, fischl. and then i switch depending on the domain/boss i’m gonna fight. hmm elements I think would go: anemo, cryo, electro, pyro, hydro, geo, dendro? LMAO i reckon if i had diluc tho pyro would be higher... i also almost forgot to add geo to that list lmaooooooo oops, hbu??

I JUST SAW THE LINK.... AAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! the bestest boys look how cute they’re sjdkfjdjjdd i’m obsessed. the picture where benny has his back turned sjdudjdjddnd stop. 🥺 they’re so neat. 🥺 also NO ARE YOU SERIOUS? that’s so upsetting are you gonna try it out nonetheless or do you think it’s too risky?

they’re SO neat!!! and bennett facing the other way was so fhskjfd yeah cute <3333333 I KNOWWW IM SO SAD :((( and no...... im not gonna try 😭😭😭 i told my brother about it too and he asked how many rolls i was at and i said 70 and he was straight up ‘you can’t try then’ and i was like ‘i know 😔😔’. @ xiao... i am giving up xingqiu rate up for you 😤😤😤😤 ugh i hope i can still get xingqiu in xiao’s banner tho even tho the chances will be shit. are you gonna roll ganyu’s banner?

FHSKJFSD NOOOOOO don’t tell me 172 is average for you wtf... (apparently the average male height in japan is 160cm! for reference ahah) and i myself am. one hundred and. fifty something cm hfsdjfhskjdfhskdjfhw9uehdsifhwsdkjfhsdkfhsd 😔 big sighs lmaoooooooo. how tall are you? (im assuming much taller 😔😔😔😔😔)

ooh notes app? nice ahaha. fhdkjfhskfsk hdthat’s the mood tho! if i don’t have my laptop with me i’ll write out everything on notes first then transfer to my laptop~

AHAHAH yeahhh i think mostly i do? bc during school times i’ll only write after i’m done with my work which = night time. for a while Peak writing time for me was like 1am lmfao but i do that in a like half-asleep half-conscious state so when i come back the next day at a “normal” time i run into the same issue as you fshdfkjshfs

she does!!! it’s called colours 😩 but i think the one i related to voltron most is control! there was this really good shiro edit with that song i still remember it to this day <3 yeah i do!!! i like most of melanie’s songs actually ahahah. i think my favourite for a while was show and tell~

it totally does!! like it’s satisfying as well you know... like the characters have gone through so much and you experienced that with them so it’s natural to get emotional about it. that reminds me, what kind of books do/did you read? did you read all Those YA novels ahah talking about crying has reminded me how i cried reading those..

<333 i wanna be there with them 😩 actually no i want to BE them 😩😩😩

eager for your response <33 love, c.r.