#im crazy about animal crossing now u got me Thinking
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if flavio was a villager of animal crossing what do you think he would be
TOUGH ONE honestly i can see him as multiple different species ahhhh
he could be a cub.. or a hamster.. chicken.. or any of the birds honestly.. anteater.. 🧐
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omgg im so obsessed with your jackass oc’s. i dont have a specific headcanon request but could you write more about a main cast girl?
yesssss yes !! & thank u sm that means the world <3 i have many more ideas and am gonna post actual headcanons and stuff but for now take this very random and very specific shit
her nickname is pissbaby. i have said it before but i must say it again so everyone is aware. she got it growing up and tbh there isn’t a real reason for it other than the fact that she has pissed herself a few times
went to the met gala with knox (was def invited before he was tho)
braids pontius’ hair a lot. does his hair in general. she’s good with hair styling nd even cuts her own
was the one to receive the off road tattoo
is always paired with knox (and tremaine sometimes) for press shit
has a lot of modeling/movie offers but tbh she just wants to skate and do stunts and travel and hang out with her guys
ik i said she cant cook but i changed my mind. cooking is lowkey her love language. she’s a vegetarian but doesn’t mind cooking meat if someone wants it. a long day filming? invites everyone over and cooks for them.
doesnt cook for herself tho. the queen of struggle meals. buys a lot of cereal
also always let’s ppl crash at her place. pontius is there a lot cuz the whole living in his van situation. he and steve were in her (iconic) cribz ep
present for most of the wildboyz trips even if she didn’t appear in the episode. she loves animals and traveling and learning about other cultures so it was like heaven for her
CRAZY stupid .. like, almost as bad as knoxville. she somehow was able to get in the bullpen and it scared the shit out of everyone (especially steve o)
honestly she doesn’t like fucking with animals and doesn’t wanna do anything to hurt them. she feels bad for certain things they do and regrets stressing them out
and she can be really sweet, but with animals? she is practically a different person. she turns into such a softie
has a few doggies. all rescues and with disabilities because she gets sad when people don’t want them
probably closest to the wildboyz, especially pontius. but knox too, and dunn <3
super fond of preston too. he’s so sweet and she can’t help but adore him
ppl swear either chris or pj is her soulmate (myself included nd i cant decide who pls help me)
always down for skate sessions
is sponsored by powell peralta (and is kinda at war with bam because he thinks his element sponsorship is better)
very fashionable. an it girl. (again, i picture her as devon aoki)
super scrappy and will fight a grown man
she knows how to fall because she’s a skater but she also has gotten some GNARLY injuries. usually to her head. always has bruises
knows first aid and she isn’t a medic obv but she has been SUPER helpful in certain situations
literally unable to drive, and yet, she drove for part of the gumball rally .. she managed to genuinely scare the guys. she doesn’t have her license for a reason.
one of those ppl who genuinely does not need deodorant but unfortunately the smell of jackass clings to her
has a lot of girl friends. she is a girl supremacist. we don’t blame her.
she can be really mean sometimes but most of it is on accident. she just doesn’t have a filter. the guys don’t really care tho, she fits in
ska music enthusiast. and a deadhead
so she doesn’t puke and doesn’t get grossed out HOWEVER she refuses to take part in that yucky shit. hell no. that’s what crosses the line.
once the guys collected a cup of their mixed sweat and poured it on her and she has never been so mad. like, she gets mad, she has a temper, but she lost her shit in a way that she never has before. made them turn off the camera. knoxville was the one to pour it—no one else was brave enough. tremaine was even on the fence about it. she ended up breaking knox’s nose. he was a good sport about it. they didn’t fuck with her in that way ever again
she can be kinda mean but it’s usually on accident cuz she has no filter. but for the most part the guys don’t give a fuck and it’s funny
interviewers and paps can be really really rude and sexist and the guys can’t help but get pissed and say stuff because they love her. BUT they also know that no one is better at defending her than she is. don’t fuck with her. ever. she will practically end someone’s career. she does not give a shit
#shit i write#my ocs#pissbaby#jackass#wildboyz#jackass fics#jackass oc#jackass fic#jackass x reader#jackass headcanons#jackass fluff#bam margera#johnny knoxville#chris pontius#ryan dunn#dave england#steve o#danger ehren#preston lacy#wee man
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AWWW SHY SUKAI,,, i dont trust ruki with hot objects but maybe hes well practiced,,, and shion with a pencil scares me LMAODJDKDJS
yup we’ve got tons of languages!! i only know filipino though bc im from the capital city 😭 but yea we’ve been colonized by spain, the US, and japan its been rough for us. most of our precolonial history is gone and we’re still lowkey a US military asset so we’re real screwed if the US and china go to war
YEA CHINESE NETIZENS DID THE MATH ITS CRAZY the ones who allegedly got rigged in tend to differ depending on who does the math but pick i have who got rigged out is hiroto (who was in jo1’s season and also boys planet and will be debuting soon in nxd) but concerning age,,, cpop isnt too strict on that compared to kpop and jpop. theres still that age pressure ofc but cpop tends to praise people who actively go against the status quo (ie masculine female idols, lolita girls, idols like 胡烨韬 who are as androgynous as you can get) there was even a trainee in 创造营2019 who was born in 1985 and he made it to the finale. there was some criticism ofc but he was mostly praised for being brave enough to keep trying
PLSSS the only was i can justify kyosuke’s strength is that he used to sell wheelchairs lmao im sure lifting wheelchairs into cars takes some strength
junmin!! hes the oldest member of xikers (and one of the shortest lmao) hes so cute tbh hes a bit like a yorkie,,, yappy,,, tiny,,, agile,,, he sings the first chorus of do or die. his voice always sounds like that
yea unis is crazy lmao a lot of filipinos like them because they have filipinos but. other than hyeonju theyre all just so young to me
HFNDJDJDJ HONESTLY I GET YOU if i mess up that far down a project. thats between me and god now 😭 but thanks for the compliment hdnsjsjshsjs
and i gotchu if u ever need to either yap or listen!! i can do both 💪
LMAO our politicians do the same thing dw 😔
also unrelated but someone said rihi looks like wolfgang from animal crossing and now i cant unsee
listen. you can never know how old ruki actually is in this au. tbh he probably says he doesn't know but he damn well does, down to the day and all.... but ok fair :rofl: i cant remember can anyone in jo1 draw????? i can only think of rihito and hes not in jo1 LOL
that's still impressive as hell....!!!!!!!! not the colonising bit the knowing filipino bit :sweatdrop: i hear just about all that's left of old filipino mythos are just scraps which is super super sad.... and yeah no you guys are absolutely done for if that ever happens. prolly become cannon fodder or smth. yikes
DID THE MATHS LOOOOOOOL the one benefit to have been a victim of one of the world's most demanding academic systems :rofl: RIGHT i'm pretty sure china was all over 刘逸云 back in the day. but it's cool to see things like that! most of my knowledge with chinese girls in the entertainment industry are conventionally pretty feminine girls like angelababy and like 白鹿, so the more you know! also 胡烨韬 is SO PRETTY wOW??????? 1985 omg good for him :handshake: nice to see especially when the other parts of east asia think that youth is paramount lmfao.....
OFC and his history as a baseball club member. or hes just built like that. who knows. its his redemption for being in bottom 3 ini quiz score LOL
love a short king lmao and youre so right he DOES look like a mini dog. he's got a set of pipes LOL but i admit i can't really hear much about his voice bc of the distortion :sweatdrop:
wait omg i forgot about that LOL there's like 2 filipino members right. and speaking of the philippines. what is a jollibees ive heard of it but never known what it is
OFC if you cant tell its wrong that closely then theres nothing wrong at all full stop!!! average crocheting experience!!!!!
thank you !!!!!!!!!! multitalented fr !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and wow i think its a trend to have incompetent politicians thats crazy :rofl:
oh my GOD actually theyre so right............. wait..................... no way.................. its actualyl him omg
#my favourite animal crossing villager is stinky SORRY he was one of my starting lil guys and i'm so fond of his goofy ass .........#i like hornsby a bunch too hes such a lil guy#do you play animal crossing? who's your favourite villager?#asks
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times like these im forced to reckon with weird shit alone but im thinking back on something that happened with my ex. prior to us dating he had this friend who was the cute flavor of beautiful and skinny (my worst nightmare) and they would get drunk and watch anime together (two things I couldn't do because I have GERD + I only watch girl animes). the night we first admitted our feelings for each other he literally ditched me to go hang out with her and her situationship (?). anyway we started dating and she got really weird to me. she already didn't like me despite the fact I was one of the few women defending her from the misogynistic ass loser men she chose to be friends with but whatever. we weren't friends by any stretch of the word so I get it she had no loyalty because I chose to have morals.
so one night me and the ex were making on each other and she calls him at 1 am. im like what the fuck? and I got up out of that bed so quick. he ignores it but I was peeved. so later he texts her to figure out wtf the phone call was about. they text back and forth with immediate responses for a few minutes. finally she was like heyyy omg im having a party and I want you to come <3333. unfortunately for him, I was with him so he had to text back "can Kansas come?" and I shit u not. no response for hours. like girl. I was PISSED. especially because she had invited the entire floor of film majors and excluded me.
so later I was forcing my ex to watch The Simpsons with me in the common area big ass tv. this woman comes out. im like >:(. but she starts talking to him while eating a whole loaf of wonder bread like some fetish artists wet dream. she's like so are... you guys going to come. and I was like no. we're friggin busy. anyway so awkward plussss I forgot that earlier in the week she made fun of my outfit in front of my ex and he didn't say shit. it was a baller ass outfit too. I was serving whimsigoth. so whatever I hated her.
the part where shit gets really weird is he ends up blocking her without asking me. NOW BEFORE THE INSTAGRAM REELS COMMENTERS GET ME let me explain why I didn't like this. multiple times I asked him to just be honest about their relationship and what had happened between them. im fully supportive of cross-gender friendships, and although I sound really snarky and mad in this rant, at the time I was very supportive of him continuing their friendship as long as she stopped being flirty. all he ever told me was "I informed her we were dating now." and that was supposed to make everything better. and for a month or so I thought it did. we had had no new problems. but then all of a fucking sudden you HAVE to block her?
I will admit I had bad-mouthed her to people for a really long time over the sneaky shit she did when she knew ex and I were together. ive learned my lesson but at the same time, if you are openly flirting with people in relationships, you deserve to get what's coming to you. but I still think I coulda taken a fuckin Xanax about it idk. I blame my own actions and choices but the BPD def contributed,,,,,,,,, not an excuse but I think we gotta call a spade a spade and then try to beat that spade to death in therapy
anyway one time I got in an argument with my ex because he was shitting on her for her personality and like yeah I defended her because I don't know and I don't care. I was like if she's such a horrible, crazy person why were you friends with her? anyway he said it was because he was only friends with women he found hot LOL and then admitted to thinking she was hot LOL and that the only reason he wasn't with her is because "she was crazy" LOL
ugh I just spent 30 minutes writing this and then had dinner and now I don't wanna think about this anymore because it makes me feel suicidal like I wanna rip all the veins out of my fucking wrists fuck my life and the worst part is ill never find someone willing to tolerate me ever again
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where do i even begin oh boy oh boy where do i even START. i have read all of this and I LOVE IT ALLSOMCUCH. all of these hcs have been adopted, i hope u r proud of such a feat. apologies if i don’t touch on everything, im not the best at thatLMAOO
aghhhw potential sdr2 spoilers under the cut!!!
first off, congratulations on being the first person ever to answer my mario party question!! I FIND THE IDEA OF FUYUHIKO BEING BABY BOWSER TO BE SO INCREDIBLY FUNNY (and i know someone says something about it and the world caves as a result). hiyoko and mahiru matching is SO SWEET and ive always seen nagito as one of the drybones characters (ex. the normal drybones koopa of drybones bowser (idk if thats the names oops, not played mario party in a good bit), but more lenient towards drybones koopa bcs the idea of nagito as a type of BOWSER is HORRIFYING. THATS SO SCARY. DRYBONES BOWSER TRAVELLING ACROSS THE BOARD AT LIGHTNING PACES AND GETTING A FUCK TON OF LUCKY BLOCKS..? im okay!!!! id rather not!!!!). KAZUICHI IS *SUCH* A WALUIGI IM ALMOST IMPRESSED THAT THE THOUGHT HAS COME TO LIGHT.
point being, i love those mario party hcs, and i fw them so hard. and i love thinking of how they’d play different games together all the time!!! most likely brought on by chiaki!! wii party, stardew valley, animal crossing, mario kart, smash bros, botw/totk, and even sonic comes to mind for me!! would love to see them all sit down and see who can beat emerald hill from sth2 the quickest HAHAand i have my own hcs for them all but I SHALL HOLD BACK I SHANT RAMBLE TO THEE
NOW WE PROGRESS TO THE MAIN ATTRACTION EVERYBODY LETS GO LETS GO!!!!
of course of COURSE they’ve got the slowest of slowburns and i fully agree that it would be actually infuriating to watch. i mean im rocking back and forth in my bed as we speak marzi, i cant imagine how they’d feel. LOVEE LOVE LOVE the idea of ibuki enacting her elaborate plans to get them to confess or at least be closer to eachother, and i can already imagine her getting told off by mahiru for trapping nagito and hajime in that closet. can also imagine ibuki holding a mini concert for them all where she says before preforming that she’s dedicated a song to the two of them which im sure would have the most embarrassing lyrics on the planet earth if you could make them out. ibuki you would have me rolling in my grave with this, oh how i love u so.
i think theres something so incredibly funny about how almost BLUNT kazuichi is with it. “what he likes is watching you do manual labour with your shirt off” had me SOBBING THATSJWHAHA THAT MADE ME GIGGLE. i like to imagine he’s very blunt in that sort of vein. where hajime will say something which indicates he is so knee deep in this bullshit that he’s completely missing the point and kazuichi’s like “uhhhhhh no man, he just wants you bad.” and im SURE he’s gotten hit on the back of the head countless times. fuyuhiko having advice is also crazy to me, and i actually think he’d have pretty good, direct advice which im sure hajime would question, followed by “the fucks it to you?? bastard.” as if he wasn’t trying to be supportive moments ago.
NAGITO KOMAEDA WITH THE GIRLS IS BOTH THE FUNNIEST AND MOST INCREDIBLY ACCURATE THING EVER. im LIVING for the rekindling of nagito and mikans friendship amd everything there. i dont think i have too much to add onto it unfortunately (its late and i have work tmrw i fear 😞⁉️) but im sure something will pop up in my mind.
dear god the mutual pining.
dear fucking god.
i can almost fucking SEE the genuine annoyance from people as their conversations get more and more tense with every waking moment and they just have to sit there and watch it happen. im sure someone, like lets say akane or ibuki for example, got so sick of this to the point where they almost yelled out the fact they liked eachother and had to get their mouth covered. i can ENVISION the irritation and frustration as they witness as they have a really awkward leaving after hanging out. like the sort of “i had a lot of fun today, thank you” “ah well i guess ill see you tomorrow” type of thing but obviously 10x more tense and komahinafied. i can see the face palms and hear the groans as the rest of the cast get together to basically all be like “we’re all seeing the same shit here, right? like theyre so in love its painful.”
and leaving the confession up for interpretation is something i like too!! I ALWAYS LIKE TO MESS AROUND W DIFFERENT IDEAS IN MY HEAD ON HOW THINGS COULDVE GONE, and honestly it could go either way! either could confess, and i dont think its a case of “one is more likely to than the other” because christ on a fucking stick theyre so knee deep in denial of the other having even a glimpse of attraction towards the other. I HAVE SEEN THE ART YOURE TALKING ABOUT AND I COMPLETELY FULLY AGREE. i can already imagine how badly it’d go, and im sure because of nagitos luck cycle and the fact they SUCK ASS AT KISSING/MAKING OUT, someone would end up accidentally biting their own tongue or something along those lines. i pray they get better with time smhHELWOWHAH PRAYING FOR THEM.
jealous!hajime oh how i live for thee. nothing more said, that is PERFECT!!! oh and i LOVE the whole izuru thingy, just dont have a lot to say on them unfortunately <33. same goes for a few things like the Kazuichi Gets Trolled rule which is FULLY agree with. because of course theyre making out by a fridge with the fridge actually open, meaning their weirdly wedged IN THE FRIDGE. like of course.
AUSGWHWH AS MUCHAS I HAVE LOADS MORE TO SAY AND I COULDNT TOUCH ON EVERYTHING, I UNFORTUNATELY HAVE WORK TOMORROW AND I NEED TO BE UP AT 7AM. KELPER IS GETTING SLEEPY, TOO SLEEP TO THINK. PLEASSEEE PLEASEPLEASE CONTINUE TO INFO DUMP AB THEM I BEG, WHETHER IN REBLOGS, ASKS OR EVEN DMS IF U NEED TO RANT AB THEM, I LOVE UR INTERPRETATION SOOOOOSOSOSO MUCH !!!!!
they have been stolen, they are adopted into my own view now. AND AUGH PLSPLSPLSS IM SO GLAD U GAVE PERMISSION FOR PEOPLE TO DRAW IN THE TAGS BECAUSE I MOST CERTAINLY WILL DRAW AFTER COMPLETING THE ART BACKLOG OF THE CENTURY.
THANK U SO MUCH FOR SHARING MARZI, OH HOW ILY SO 🫶‼️
i love sharing my kmhn headcanons with people because then i get to hear them tell me how correct and smart i am and it boosts my ego
#🍊🍀#<3#hcs#OH HOW I LOVE THEM SO#also thank you for complimenting my writing???? that’s so sweet i’m honored#<- OFC MARZI!!! I LOVELOVELOVE ALL THE IDEAS U HAVE#i love sharing and talking ab ideas w people w these goofy ahh characters#ESPECIALLY komahina#bcs im an enthusiast and have the komahina parasite hungry for more
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hello I am obsessed with you and your mind, and I must ask you for recommendations of miraculous comics/fanfics/artist/etc because I trust your opinions and I am in love with you okay thanks
the way this made me laugh SDKLHSLHFW if i was not on my computer right now i would spam with the sparkly eye emoji (pleading emoji? idk what its called but its like O_O but less. creepy. okay im done)
i made this mini rec list a short while ago for some of my favorite fics off the top of my head. i would dig through my bookmarks on ao3, except i made it really recently and i only have like 7. rip
as for fancomics:
@hamsternamedmarinette invented comedy. literally so funny like.... how does her brain work? if you want a good laugh (like a full on belly laugh, wheezing laugh, painful laugh) this is the blog. every comic is just whiplash in the best way
@anna-scribbles draws them so soft???? AGAIN if i could use emojis YOU KNOW THE EMOJI IM TALKING ABOUT.... LIKE THE o_o CUTE ONE? her art is the personification of that. and its also so funny and the punchline always hits just righttt
@zoe-oneesama i think pretty much everyone knows about her Scarlet Lady AU, but just in case you don’t, it’s a reimagining of the show where chloe steals the ladybug miraculous from marinette and becomes a superpowered pain in the butt. it’s,,, so well done and really funny and lots of things that bother me from the show bother the author too so she fixes them LMAO
@buggachat again, i think everyone knows about this blog but just. top tier comedy. such funniness. but also hella angst sometimes. they’ve got a baker enemies AU going on rn and its DELICIOUS. basically hawkmoth has been defeated, everyone knows it was gabriel agreste, and adrien (who was chat noir, but never revealed his identity to mari/LB) is suspected by everyone and ostracized :( this “everyone” is namely MARINETTE who thinks he’s after her bc he found out she’s the guardian and. it is a lot so i won’t try to explain it all but hopefully that gives you the gist of it LOL
@carpisuns was debating whether to put this blog under fancomics or fanart BECAUSE SHE DOES BOTH AND SHE DOES BOTH AT THE SAME TIME AND SHE DOES THEM SO WELL !!!! FULLY COLORED COMICS? SONG LYRIC COMICS?? AND THE FEELS.... the feels hit you hard here. but the fluffy feels too so dw
now FANART
@rosekasa CUTE. SO CUTE. LIKE U JUST WANNA KISS THE ARTS LIKE MWAH they’re so cUUUUTEEEEE her style is like a marshmallow, it’s so fluffy and sweet and. its just so cute oh my god i have no other vocabulary for it
@jjuuppiter artwork? ON POINT. aus? ON POINT. ANIMATIONS? SO ON POINT !!!!! THE ANIMATIONS BLOW ME AWAY you might have seen one where it was like an anime opening as miraculous? like i didnt know the anime but i cant tell you how many times i’ve rewatched that animation BECAUSE IT IS JUST SO COOL. i love it sm its crazy good
@lc-holy this is another one of the fancomic/fanart crosses because ALL HER COMICS ARE COLORED AND SO BEAUTIFUL... i put carpisuns in comics so im putting this blog under fanart, that is the only reason LOL but PLEASE CHECK THIS OUT the work she puts into the comics is amazing and you can just see it ....... so good. such good food
@picayunearts (for some reason tumblr wasnt linking this blog so i manually did it and hopefully i did not mess it up) literally jaw dropping. their use of colors and mood setting is GORGEOUS and as a chicken-scratch artist who never colors i am so envious LMAO. it’s just like... u can just stare it at for at least six minutes straight. at least i did
now for headcanons and stuff (there’s only 2 but i had to mention them)
@gale-gentlepenguin amazing AUs, amazing headcanons, you get the whole package, angst, comedy, fluff, NAME IT. (also amazing april fools jokes LOL)
@sariahsue lots of incorrect quotes!!! was lowkey stalking the blog to see if i could draw any LMAOOO (i think they write fics too, and im pretty sure i have read them before i had an ao3, but because im 99.9% sure and not 100% this is not under fics)
okay this got super long and i just KNOW im missing so many blogs. these are the ones i could think of off the top of my head while im in english class (oops). i will definitely add on more when i remember them, but theres just so much TALENT IN THIS FANDOM this post could be miles long and still not include everyone
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hc for kenma and fem reader, that’s been friends w hinata since middle school and goes to karasuno, like how would they meet, how would they confess, first date etc. can the reader also be a first year. but doesn’t play volleyball she just watched hinata sorry if that doesn’t make sense
we’re all soft for kenma hours 🙈
also there's a lot to consider and include here so this is going to be a little longer than my usual hcs posts
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KENMA WITH A FIRST YEAR S/O HE MEETS THROUGH HINATA
you’ve been friends with hinata since your first day of middle school when you got sat next to the excitable volleyballer
you both ended up attending karasuno high much to his delight
when he’s not with his volleyball team he’s with you telling you everything about it since you don’t play the sport yourself
you know all the rules and basics by now by attending enough of his practices and games
so hinata has just come back from the training camp that he attended in tokyo
he is telling you all about the new techniques and he’s worked on and all the new people he’s met
“there was this biiiggg third year! he’s captain of fukurodani and one of the top 4 aces in japan!!”
“uh huh”
“and his friend was captain of the rival team we want to play in nationals, another big third year with weird bed hair!”
“sounds like you met a lot of new friends”
“yup! but one of my new favourite friends is the setter of the team we want to play in nationals, his name is kenma, he’s a second year and he’s super quiet but he’s a real good player!”
hinata shows you a picture he took with this kenma
there next to one of your closest friends stood a boy with long blonde hair, his dark roots showing but somehow it made his whole look all the more attractive, golden feline eyes and a gentle shy smile as he looked up at the camera.
now, while you’re thinking about how cute kenma is, hinata is actually watching you
you see, unbeknownst to you, the little middle blocker had mentioned you on several occasions to his new friend
something about kenma made hinata think of you while he was in tokyo
so he felt the need to talk all about you to him to which kenma listened to intently
so there’s a practice match against nekoma coming up
obviously you go because you want to support your friend
you literally forget all about kenma and how he plays for nekoma
honestly hinata tells you all about every single new friend he meets wherever he goes
so it’s hard to keep track of who is who and where everyone comes from
but the picture of kenma comes flashing back when you see him out on the court
hinata wasn’t lying
he was a good player
he seems like he isn’t that into it but you can tell he’s calculating his moves to be precise
very much a contrasting character compared to the rest of his outgoing team
nekoma end up winning by one set but it’s only a friendly practice match so all is well
you go down to congratulate hinata and the rest of the team
and hinata is there with kenma chatting happily while the shy setter is smiling and nodding slightly
you make your way over to hinata and he notices you and his smile beams even brighter
“kenma look! this is y/n the friend i told you all about! isn’t she pretty?!”
you’re blushing and so is kenma
brief introductions are done between the two of you and before you know it hinata is off to go and annoy kageyama
you’re left there standing with the rivalling team’s setter
at first the atmosphere is awkward but kenma actually speaks up first
“so... you’re friends with shoyo he's told me a lot about you”
“all good things i hope”
kenma lets out a small smile and your heart flutters slightly
“all good things”
you and kenma actually have a pretty good conversation from there and end up exchanging social handles
from there your friendship begins properly
tagging each other in memes
late night texting
kenma even convinces you to indulge in a few games he himself plays
kuroo notices kenma has been smiling at his phone more lately
“new game?”
“no”
“ohoho? no game? is it a girl?~”
“y/n from karasuno”
kenma is so blunt dhfshdfgsdugsdfu
kuroo is sitting there like 👁💧👄💧👁
“you didn't tell me you had a girlfriend i thought we were best friends”
“she isn’t my girlfriend”
“do you want her to be though?”
kenma is silent
you are the first girl he has actually felt comfortable with
you guys have been friends for a good 3 months now
maybe he did want you to be his girlfriend but he isn’t sure how to go about confessing
one night the two of you are up playing animal crossing together
it’s 2am and neither of you feel like sleeping
you’re ready to go catch some fish but you check your mail box first and see a letter from kenma
it says ‘come over to my island i have something to show you’
you notice kenma is online
when is he not online?
his gates are usually open around these hours for people selling turnips or whatever
so you make your way over to kenma’s island and his little character is waiting fro you outside the airport
then he calls you over the phone to which you answer
the two of you are just casually talking and gently laughing with each other until kenma speaks up
“follow me”
he says quietly through the phone
so your little animal crossing characters and running around the screen until kenma leads you to a patch of gold roses
gOLD ROSES hufgugfegbfgu rich boy tings
“KENMA YOU DIDN’T TELL ME YOU GOT GOLD ROSES WTF??”
and in the middle of the patches of roses you see a personalised sign
you guys know the ones im talking about right? the little boards you can make and decorate around your island
n e ways
‘y/n, will you be the cyrus to my reese’
that’s so fuckin cute ily kenma fhjdfd
so after you read it you have the biggest smile on your face
“of course i will kenma!”
he is smiling so hard rn
ugh you’re official now yes bitches
hinata is e c s t a t i c when he find out
kuroo is so mf smug but he’s so proud of kenma
the first chance you get you go to visit tokyo to see your new boyfriend
the two of you go to a cat cafe
and then you guys are strolling through a park and feed the ducks
and then you guys go back to kenma’s house for take out
you’re both playing animal crossing, smash bros, mario kart etc
at the start of the day kenma is so nervous
but you make him feel so comfortable the nerves wash away
but anyways y’all are thriving playing your games
kenma isn't huge on pda but he does acknowledge the fact you don’t get to see each other too often so he will be open to cuddling
you’re resting your head on his shoulder while you play though
nothing to crazy you guys are taking it slow after all
your aunt lives in tokyo so you’ll be staying with her for the night
so neither of you have to worry about weirdos on the train at night
so it gets to about 10:45 and you and kenma decide to call it a night
this shy baby gives u a soft kiss before you go
he is so soft fjahfk
after that date there are many more to come
as well as hinata’s matches you also some to watch kenma play whenever you can
the nekoma team love you
they’re so happy their precious kenma has finally found someone outside of volleyball who makes him happy
you’re basically shared between both teams now
nationals who are you gonna cheer for tho lmao
i honestly think when kenma finds the right one he’ll stay with her
like he doesn’t open up easily so when he knows he’s found the one he will absolutely feel more comfortable in opening up and being more vulnerable
kenma wasn’t really bothered about love and relationships before
but thanks to you he’s glad he stepped out his comfort zone
because besides the family he’s got in volleyball
he also has you know
and you’ve taught him a new form of love
-
requests are open!!
#kozume kenma#kenma x reader#kenma x you#kenma hcs#kenma scenario#haikyuu hcs#haikyuu hc#haikyuu scenario#haikyuu#haikyuu!!
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a voltron au? in 2020? it’s more likely than you think
look. LOOK. i know that voltron is stupid and we hate it but lets be honest: everything up until season 3 was pretty good and had lots of potential !!
today i was rewatching voltron and a thought struck me: what if, instead of shiro being cloned, he was chipped and turned to the side of the galra?
so here it is, i did not blink since i thought of this
(warning, i have not seen voltron in a while and this is just knowledge i have stored in my moss brain and stuff i know from rewatching the first season)
au where shiro goes evil bc of what happens @ end of season one instead of the clone thing bc 1) haggar rly could not have made thousands of shiros after bumping into team voltron like what twice? its hella improbable and 2) just… weird
so instead they insert a chip in him that helps them spy and control him just like kuron (the clone) did minus the unlikely storytelling
eventually after the convo with sendak when he was in the pod trying to temp shirp, he does have thoughts about helping zarkon
(“im already infiltrated with the arm, i could just speed up the process by leaving now. save the team the trouble of investing in a leader that’s doomed to fail from the strart.”)
shiro ends up leaving team voltron in season 2 after zarkon goes crazy w the black lion n stuff
^^ this adds to Keith’s reasoning of joining the Blade of Marmora (shiro is his main stability and one of the main reasons he even stuck around with team voltron, so with shiro gone and keith questioning his place as the leader and paladin of the black lion, he decides the BoM is just.. what’s best for him)
obviously lance isn’t happy with this (“you just told me that i’m a valuable member, now you don’t think YOU are? what logic is that?”)
ofc keith goes anyways
lance becomes paladin of the black lion
allura takes on the red lion
who has blue lion? ...idk this isn’t that thought out (maybe matt after pidge finds her family) (which will happen earlier in the plot since we can forget about the miniplot of black no longer responding to shiro)
enter lotor only this time he has a sidekick and what omg its shiro wow
shiro has that bigger version of his arm that was once offered to him
he’s stronger and scary, but his eyes aren’t the same, he has the strength of a galra but lacks the passion
in the fight between lotor and zarkon, (and after, of course lots of self doubt and questioning) shiro comes between them and convinces lotor NOT to kill zarkon
then zarkon kills lotor
everyones like oh shit bc surely someone who’s life was just spared wouldn’t kill the person who seems to have the most power
but he did. bc he’s zarkon. and he’s fckn crazy.
shiro doesn’t go back to team voltron bc its too much too easily
instead he takes the place of lotor in the group of gals
he convinces them all to rebel against the galra
eventually they teach him all about quintessence and all the shit lotor had planned that they can’t do anymore
(lotor wasn’t harvesting alteans in this universe bc what the heck even was that subplot that had little to no relevance to the main storyline?
instead he was trying to find a way to technologically bring back alteans (kinda like how allure’s dad was originally preserved in s1)
i know nothing about How Stuff Works and i dont remember much about quintessence n shit but the basic idea is that when tying in some of a persons artifacts with technology stuff and some quintessence then boom. a weird route from astral projection land to the team is created and ppl can come back or smth idfk
but lotor was never able to get the comet so shiro decides he and the gals will get that comet and try to bring back as many alteans as they can
^ all this while infiltrating as many galra fleets as possible + saving planets under galra empire
they personally visit every planet that lotor was in charge of and release them from galra control
they are able to bring back an altean (its romelle) and she talks abt her friend who lives on the balmera and they go to the balmera and its revealed that it was shay’s great grandmother so romelle asks where shay is and shay’s family is like with team voltron of course
so
they take her
obviously team voltron, the BoM and the Rebels r very hesitant to make contact but they decide to try it out
keith refuses to meet, instead he’s on the team that stands guard
reunions !!
romelle and shay hit it off and hunk makes a dinner much like roselle’s past (allura and coran also hang out and they all vibe)
lance talks to shiro abt everything to do with keith and shiro is like dude do u??? like him?
and lance is like what? no ofc not—oh shit.
and keith ✨overhears ✨
pidge matt and shiro catch up n shit
meanwhile keith is like Hey Lance Uhhhhhh What The Fuck
they end up being like hey since we’re all here and we hate zarkon what if we make a plan to end the galra’s reign Right Now
so they do
and y’all.. it’s hella baller plan
except something is going wrong and in the middle of an attack zarkon is able to get the upper hand
due to haggar’s magic and lance’s mental and emotional instability, zarkon is able to get in his head
everyone is trying to talk him down but they’re all under a lot of pressure
allura is also conflicted bc she wanted to be black lion bc she wanted to rub it in to zarkon’s face that she was stronger than he and that she could beat him at his own game
but the negativity and instability feeds into zarkon’s power and makes him and haggar stronger as they pull in voltron to finally take over the team and regain their status as the most powerful alien race
hunk realizes this and is like okay can y’all stop being negative? its clearly affecting them in a good way and it makes us an easier target
and pidge is like im literally a child pls i don’t wanna die i just got my family back it can’t end like this
shiro realizes what’s going on and he goes to save them
he uses all his energy, pulling in the positive memories (everything: first learning about space, becoming a teacher, meeting adam, meeting keith, first making team voltron, his friends and family--all of it) to push back zarkon and haggar’s powers and battle once more in the astral realm
in defeating zarkon, shiro loses his life
afterwards keith enters the ship in a hurry and is like where the fuck is shiro where’s my brother what did you do what happened
and team voltron is like hey man.. we are so so sorry
and keith cries because the last thing he ever said to shiro was mean
lance feels like its all his fault since he was supposed to be a good leader
they talk about separately while hunk pidge and allura discuss
krolia is like keith we, ur family, are here for u
and axca is there and shes like um?? hey?? sry for trying to kill u bro
and he’s like i absolutely do not wanna talk i just lost my closest friend
they talk about it later
axca tells keith abt shiro finishing lotor’s work and abt bringing people back and well..
they use the methods to help keith visit shiro in the astral realm
shiro is like oh uh hey i was just having a drink w adam we r happy
and keith is like shiro u fuckhead why would u sacrifice urself
shiro sighs bc cmon keith you KNOW why “remember what i always said? we can’t focus on what went wrong..”
“we’ve got to figure out how to make it right” keith finishes
keith breaks tf down crying and screams apologizing
“i love u shiro. ur a like a big brother to me.”
and shiro is like yeah i know and ilyt but hey. everyone’s safe and happy. im safe and happy. & you deserve to be too. you don’t need me anymore.
so the galra rule is over and everyone goes to their respected planets
romelle and the other alteans as well as some galra babes hang in earth
romelle and shay r in an apartment together and have a garden
allura realizes she may not have been the strongest leader for voltron, and couldn’t stop zarkon on her own but that physical strength doesn’t define her as a whole
her heart is strong enough to care for everyone, so thats what she does
allura starts running an inn for alteans filled with painted sceneries like altea in case anyone ever needs a reminder of home
when lance reunites with his family its a real tearjerker
rachel finally gets her jacket back and veronica is like So.. Axca 👀
the McClain’s host a huge party for everyone and it’s filled with lots of hugs and loud music and even tho lance was way too tired, he danced all night
he wouldn’t trade his family for the world—genetic and chosen
when hunk reunites with his parents they don’t let him out the house for hours, he tells them all about his new best friend shay as well as hundreds of his favorites stories from space
they are so, so proud of him
hunk spends the next days playing minecraft and animal crossing with pidge, giving their brains a rest from being on hyperdrive for 3 yrs straight
when pidge gets home she finally gets grounded by her mom, only being allowed to leave the house to see her old teammates
(same for matt and her dad)
(her mother cries so hard when they opened the door to the home)
the holt family holds movie nights filled with popcorn, cuddles, and tears
keith moves in with the holt family, and finally accepts that he has a home as well as a family
he often goes on trips with the BoM but mostly just stays on earth
after a Team Voltron sleepover in the altea inn keith and lance decide to get an apartment together and live their lives in love and in peace
everyone gets together once a year in celebration of shiro and the sacrifice he made for them
they use the ship to visit Astral Shiro and once they even met adam
everyone laughs and catches up and just... live their lives
everyone is happy
pls ignore any and all errors lmao
again, just a thought !! maybe i’ll write a fic abt it idk for sure but yeah
feel free to add anything <3
#voltron#voltron legendary defender#vld#voltron au#shiro#shiro voltron#adam voltron#keith voltron#keith kogane#lance mcclain#lance voltron#klance#klance voltron#hunk voltron#pidge holt#pidge voltron#matt holt#matt holt voltron#allura#allura voltron#lotor voltron#lotor#writing#au
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tagged by @evenmyhivemindisempty 😘❤️️
Name: rachael
Gender: she/her
Star sign: aquarius
Height: 5'4"
Time: 4:51 pm
Birthday: jan 26
Favorite band(s): king gizzard and the motherfucking wizard lizard. that band is my heart band. also i've really been into tzusing and ok go recently
Favorite solo artist(s): ummmmm. tipper!
Song stuck in my head: IT'S BEEN A LONG ROAD
Last movie I watched: oh hell idk. i don't watch movies. uhh. the last one i remember was grand budapest hotel while i was on an acid trip w friends, it was an exceptional movie inebriation or no
Last show I watched: enterprise lol
When did I create this blog: like in 2011. it's ancient.
When I post: usually in the mornings before i leave for work and then at night when i get home. i spend my days off nonstop tumblr scrolling to procrastinate having to write so often on wednesdays and thursdays lol
Last thing googled: "spot" looking for spotify and accidentally hitting enter too soon
Other blogs: @vorta-whore for my smutty writings :)
Do I get asks: yes! there are a couple of you that faithfully ask me things when i reblog those ask lists and for yall i am endlessly grateful <3 <3 <3
Why I chose my URL: from a quote - "stay neurotic. stay emotional. stay frustrated. stay excited. your life is happening." once upon a time i really needed the reminder that it's OKAY not to have things under control all the time, life is crazy and i should just fucking learn to go along for the ride.
Followers: 416 but sooooo many of those are inactive after 10 years of just gathering followers here and there
Average hours of sleep: 6 probably
Lucky number: like many other nintendo kids, 64
Instruments: nada. but i did briefly play the melodica when i was into SPG.
What I’m wearing: my server uniform cause i'm on break at work lol. black skinny jeans n a black button up (with the sleeves rolled up for sex appeal)
Dream trip: ohhhh my honeymoon was planned for cali lol. probably there. cbd massages, horseback riding on the beach, spending way too much money at a dope shop and smuggling my spoils home...
Favorite food: potatoes, in any form. also chocolate is a big contender.
Nationality: im a white-ass jew
Favorite song: right now it's vessel - red sex. just a cool dark discordant song, feels like the soundtrack to something fucked up happening.
Last book I read: i'm about halfway through star trek gamma mission book 4: lesser evil. it's got my man taran'atar in it very briefly but i'm also getting sucked into vaugn's whole thing with his wife.
Top 3 fictional universes i’d like to live in: i think u fucking know which universe takes all three spots. cmon. i would also maybe accept pokemon or animal crossing.
Favorite color: cycles between green, blue and purple. right now it's purple!
not sure who's already done this or been tagged but HERE GOES: @tomvorikandharry @pedantic-savantic @missiodine @lasernahrwal @dukatsscalytitties @femalehumanoid
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HELLU BLESSY HERES THAT ASK- so what are your voices hcs for your boys ??? i mean duh im interested in 3 in particular coughs berrypassred coughs but im curious about all the beanpoles and beanbags you have 👀👀👀 and if you dont have specific People's Voice, do you have a generic rough idea of how it'd sound ? -B☆
Heya bb french fry UwU ❤❤❤ and yeess this the ask u mentioned uh months ago now, since I am so late in replying to this, but ahh it’s such a good ask, especially since I haven’t actually done so properly yet, given my boys voices that is xD
As it’s extremely hard for me to do so for some reason, like a voice just needs to sound like completely perfect or its a no go! But let’s see if I can scrounge some up for ya!
Red for me has always had the voice of the male singer from Aqua, especially the song Lollipop (Candyman), but give him more of a Brooklyn like accent and it’s perfect. Tho if you guys remember that voice actor crashboombanger something, they did a really good UF snas voice which could work too, but yeah for my Red the male singer from Aqua is the voice for him yes.
Stretch got the voice of the youtuber BrutalMoose, as it just fits him so well with how chill Ian, which is his name, sounds like and the humour is so very spot on too for Stretch.
Rus’s voice is that of John Hancock from Fallout 4, it’s been his voice for ages actually as it just fits with how uh what’s the word… how scratchy the voice is, it just fits Rus so well.
Papyrus voice of course is Skeletor like, it’s just the perfect kind of voice for him in my opinion. Tho there are some youtubers who does really good voices for him in their playthroughs, and there have been some animations and uh sound clips (?) I have seen here on Tumblr that is really good too, can’t recall what they are called tho. But there is one with Papyrus swearing like crazy which I feel works really, really well.
I guess you could say that my other more Papyrus like boys, like Pop, Velvet and Fraktur, so do they have similar voices to Papyrus. Just that Pop sounds older and so much more tired, Velvet’s is more feminine and well sexual but still very much Papyrus like, and Fraktur it doesn’t really change much just more chaotic and feral I guess pft!
And for the rest, I haven’t been able to find any proper voices that just fits xD tho if anyone got any like ideas themselves like srsly feel free to send me/tell me them so I can check them out, as gods knows that I would love to have some more decided voices for my boys.
But here are more of them who I got more just vague ideas for, explained as good as I possibly can pft:
Boney I always imagine having a very feminine but deep voice, like one of those anime boys who are pretty flamboyant, prolly cross dresses af, and when they get really angry their voice is suddenly extremely deep and manly. But at the same time it’s like not extremely womanly and not like the more jokey feminine voice either, he got a very nice voice and can sing really well. But at the same time I still like imagine it to be close to Stretch’s voice headcanon but at the same time not, it’s hard to explain pft.
Scratch’s voice is that of like an anime boy who is like 12-15 somewhere there who is pretty feminine, he sounds very, very young which he hates, since he appears even more like he is 12 when he is far af out of stripes. It’s also very, very loud, he got some serious range with how loud he can get, with some practice he would probably be able to break glass at command.
Pass and Berry got very similar voices, except that Pass’s got one heck of an accent, but it’s like pretty young boyish voice, but still a bit like deep, you can tell they are young but like not too young if that makes sense. Like kind of the voice of a anime shonen main character but like deeper or something like it, like when they do a time skip kinda thing, so its older.
Cash’s voice is like any like scumbag voice there is, like you know characters in shows/games that are clearly up to no good and trying to swindle you, got that rasp in it and you just know he bad. Very similar to how Rus’s voice headcanon is like, just more scumbagy.
Dex’s voice sounds like a surfer party dude, like kind of like the voice of Michelangelo from the TMNT 2k3/7 dunno, that one anyway kinda! Just with much more surfer lingo and so much swearing and sexual stuff smashed in.
Edge’s voice is really hard to pinpoint, as while I do for example love the voice crashboombanger gave him, so does it not fit at all my own take on him. I could kind of picture him with the voice of Gideon Emery who done voices like Balthier from ff12 and Fenris from Dragon age 2, but also the voice of the npc Aymeric from ff14, doesn’t help that Edge and Aymeric is pretty alike too pft, but at the same time those voices are a bit too deep, Edge would be a bit lighter, but something like that at least.
And that is all the voices I can think of that I have, well thought about so to speak xD sorry for taking so long, these asks got a habit of getting lost in my drafts pft! Feel free to send in this kind of ask again for them other boys, bc hey might figure them out by then, and I am always up for suggestions yes pft
#undertale#underfell#underswap#swapfell#MessedUpEssy#swapfell kh#Essy Answers#Essy's Undertale Headcanons#seaswap#EaseSwap#MessedUpTale#underlöst#3in1tale#long post#too tired to tag every single one of them boys#ahh this took way longer than it should have#but oh well it's done and i'm happy#even tho i could had tried to figure out them other boys but gods i got so many#i got 13 tho technically 14 if u count the regular ut bros when it comes to set of skele boys#i need to be stopped
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otp tag.
tagged by @solasan, thank u!!!!! tagging: @ritualism and @editoress i think all my other Wayhaven ppl have been @’d already
PENNY AND FELIX EDITION
DISAGREEMENTS.
who is more likely to raise their voice?
i neither! penny if i had to choose, but shes usually p good at keeping cool. and felix doesn’t seem like a shouty person anyways.
who threatens to leave but never actually does?
N/A
who actually keeps their word and leaves?
N/A
who trashes the house?
N/A
do either of them get physical?
N/A
how often do they argue/disagree?
i think their first disagreement is in book 2 when Felix got hurt during Sanja’s rescue. Penny feels super guilty about it and is worried Felix is brushing it off when he has a right to be upset. She’s kinda haunted by that whole situation and the choice she had to make. Other than that, they definitely never really argue. At most in the beginning Penny was just kind of oblivious/flippant because she’s socially awkward lol
who is the first to apologize?
both lmao
SEX.
who is on top? who is on bottom?
Felix is a little top you cant convince me otherwise
any kinks?
not really
who has the strangest desires?
i think they’re mostly just cute in bed without anythnig crazy going on
who’s dominant in bed?
FELIX!! in the cute ‘i got this’ kind of way. Penny’s shy so definitely not her.
is head ever in the equation?
duh
if so, who is better at performing it?
felix has the charisma but i think penny has the technique
ever had sex in public?
they did almost fuck in nate’s library
who moans the most?
Penny! Felix thinks its cute
who leaves the most marks?
FELIX LOVES HICKIES. hes sad that they don’t last super long on him, but she tries anyway.
who is the more experienced of the two?
I think they’re pretty even actually
do they ‘fuck’ or ‘make love’?
latter
how long do they usually last?
im sure it varies
rough or soft?
soft!!
is protection used?
YES. penny is ON that shit. Though she wouldn’t be against having kids one day.
does it ever get boring?
nah they’re too cute and in gross cuddly love. Does felix look like he’d EVER get bored of the detective
where is the strangest place they’d have sex?
it didnt happen but again, nates library. Penny was secretly kinda into it
FAMILY.
do they plan on having children / do they have children?
I don’t think either are seriously considering it for a while but Penny is a good 50/50 on it!
if so, how many children do they want/have?
just one, maybe two.
AFFECTION.
who likes to cuddle?
Felix! Penny’s a little more standoffish in general with physical affection, but she does love cuddling Felix. If he wants to cuddle she’s p much always down for it.
who gets naughty in the most inappropriate of places?
Felix. Have you heard what that boy says
who struggles to keep their hands to themself?
Felix! Though only in private. He know’s Penny’s shy and its cute to do it when shes working or something. He likes playfully distracting her.
how long can they cuddle until one becomes uncomfortable?
Probably for a good while, though Penny has a tendency to get antsy. Usually it just means her getting up and him happily following after her though
what is their favourite non-sexual activity?
video games! She showed him Animal Crossing and it was over
where is their favourite place to cuddle?
on the couch!
SLEEPING.
who snores?
Penny...
if both do, who snores the loudest?
Not loudly , but again penny.
do they share a bed or sleep separately?
they share a bed!
if they sleep together, do they cozy up together or lay far apart?
depends!
what do they wear to bed?
Penny wears pj shorts and a cotton shirt, pretty simple. Felix is probs similar
are either of them insomniacs?
Penny DEFINITELY is. Thankfully Felix doesn’t sleep a lot so she’s rarely disturbing him!
can sleeping pills be found by the bedside?
YEP. Especially after book 1, she started having nightmares.
do they wrap their limbs around each other or just lay side by side?
Felix is a koala.
who wakes up with bed hair?
Penny. Felix somehow always looks fucking perfect and she’d be jealous if she didn’t think it was so charming.
who wakes up first?
Penny. Even if Felix is just lazing about, she’s one of those responsible people or something.
who prepares breakfast in bed for the other?
Felix tried. keyword being tried.
what is their favourite sleeping position?
Penny sleeps on her side and Felix clambers around either with one leg over her or spooning her usually.
do they set an alarm each night?
Penny does!
who has nightmares?
Both :(. Hard to tell with Felix how often for him
can a television be found in their bedroom?
Penny doesn’t have a TV
who has ridiculous dreams?
Felix for sure. Sometimes involving stuff pertaining to the Echo World and Penny is like ??? and he doesn’t know how to explain it.
who sprawls out and takes up most of the bed?
Felix
who makes the bed?
Felix, because he insists. Penny goes back and straightens it out
what time is bed time?
bed by 1
any routines/rituals before bed?
felix insists on brushing their teeth together bc he thinks its cute (penny does too). its how she first actually got a glimpse of his fangs
who’s the grumpiest when they wake up?
neither! though felix DOES complain.
WORK.
who is the busiest?
penny. felix is busy keeping himself from dying of boredom
who rakes in the highest income?
n/a
are any of them unemployed?
n/a
who takes the most sick days?
Penny, though very rarely. She usually saves them for days where she wants to work from home because the office got too overwhelming.
what are their jobs?
Vampire Agent vs Police Detective
who sucks up to their boss?
Felix tries to charm Rebecca. Rebecca just sighs.
who is more likely to turn up late to work?
Felix. Got distracted
who stresses the most?
PENNY. though she usually takes things in stride, she’s a little up tight.
do they enjoy or despise their careers/occupations?
Penny is fine with being a detective and doubly fine with being an agent.
are they financially stable?
yeah!
HOME.
who does the washing?
Penny. We know what Felix’s stance is on laundry considering he hides his socks in Mason’s hamper.
who takes out the trash?
Felix , and he acts like a hero
who does the ironing?
Penny! She wears nice clothes that definitely would require ironing.
who does the cooking?
Penny is a serviceable cook, though she tends to cook the same things. And sometimes still eats like a (healthier) college student because she doesn’t have the energy. Felix LOVES using it as an excuse to order food.
who is more likely to burn the house down just trying?
Felix.
who is messier?
Felix. More just disorganized
who leaves their dirty clothes on the floor?
Felix. Again, boy clearly hates laundry
who loses the car keys when it comes time to go somewhere?
Neither. Unless Felix yoinked the keys - then they could be anywhere.
who answers the telephone?
FELIX. First ring, always.
who mows the lawn?
city slickers for life so neither
who does the vacuuming?
both. felix likes doing it and danciing
who does the groceries?
Penny because felix will bring back a bunch of things they didnt need
who takes the longest to shower?
Penny. She uses so much water
who spends the most time in the bathroom?
neither!
MISCELLANEOUS.
is money a problem?
nah theyre secret agents
how many cars do they own?
just penny’s little clunker
what’s their song?
waterfalls coming out your mouth // violet hour (especially this one) // sugar
do they live in the city or in the country?
small town
do they own their home or do they rent?
penny’s renting but wouldn’t be against owning a little flat somewhere
do they enjoy their surroundings?
wayhaven is home and comfortable for penny! she was actually falling out of love for it before she got promoted, now she feels protective over it and the supernaturals shes now aware live there.
what do they do when they’re away from each other?
felix goes insane waiting until they can meet up again. penny is often thinking abt him but is eager to get work done so she can do it even sooner
where did they first meet?
abandoned warehouse in book one - though the first meeting SHE remembers is him kissing her on the hand... romance...
who spends the most money when out shopping?
i feel they both are pretty similar! Theyre Fashionable, though Pennys really good at budgeting.
who’s more likely to flash their assets?
listen it doesnt happen in canon but if you do the combat training route with felix he fucking puts your hands up his shirt
any mental issues?
penny has anxiety and has been diagnosed as autistic since she was, like, 12. felix clearly has some shit he’s not letting himself fully mourn but OKAY BUDDY
who finds it amusing when the other trips over?
penny laughs when felix trips just because he���s like a beautiful ragdoll and always ‘saves’ himself in really funny ways. felix is such a prince charming i think he’d see her tripping more as an excuse to be dashing and handsome at her and save her from face planting than laugh.
who’s terrified of bugs?
penny definitely isn’t. could see felix losing his shit over a spider.
who kills the spiders around the house?
PENNY. doesn’t kill them though.
do they have any fears for their future?
Penny’s worried that loved ones might get put into danger due to ... everything. Verda found out about vampires and wasn’t hyped, so she’s worried about their friendship and his saftey most of all. She’s also worried about making ‘tough’ choices like the one at the end of book 2. It’s not a pleasant dilemma.
their favourite place?
Penny’s apartment!
who’s more likely to surprise the other with a fancy dinner?
felix FOR SURE
who pays the bills?
both, but penny set it all up on autopay bc felix would forget.
who’s the tallest?
Felix! He’s like what, 5′7-5′9? penny’s 5′3.
who’s more likely to just randomly hop into the shower with the other?
Both! Penny’s shy when doing it but she loves felix’s reaction because he’s always super excited.
who wanders around in their underwear?
neither
who sings the loudest when singing along to the radio?
felix. duh
what do they tease each other about?
everything! penny teases felix over how energetic and goofy and ~suave~ he is. He teases penny over being bashful - but she actually teases him more! He teases her over ROMANTIC stuff.
who is more likely to cringe at the other’s fashion sense at times?
Penny. The waistcoat, Felix. Why. No
who crushed first?
FELIX DIDDDDDDD. Penny got flustered but is very :/ at relationships bc she struggles socially and the only serious relationship she had prior was fucking BOBBY. So she straight up doesn’t trust that felix is being genuine at first. Also she’s a lil bit oblivious.
any alcohol or substance related problems?
nope!
who is more likely to stumble home, drunk, at 3am?
neither
who swears the most?
probably felix, though I don’t think he swears a lot either?
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i started thinking about that gay bastard oc of yours. platano. can u tell me about him
omg u wer thinkgin about platano..... mr banana man... mr 4011. i am obsessed with the banana code srry i just got back from work (it was good :-D)
any way. um. im going below the cut. he kidnaps people and he murders people and i hate him because he’s also a massive weeb so. hm
HISTORY OF PLATANO... yea his name is spanish for banana
his father, pablo, will probably get a name change someday but i literally never think of his father since the only thing he did in platano’s backstory was disappear
since platano’s world has characters based off like. fruits and vegetables (there aren’t really any limit to what the characters are based off of. it was in my lazy google translate name phase so we have like... a gay character named arcenciel who becomes dadlike through my powerful canon-changing touch. also arcenciel wears the colors of the rainbow as often as he can i haven’t figured out a good design for him since i’m not used to using more than 5 colors. he also owns a hat factory)
i think arcenciel and platano are friends they met when platano was like. 17 probably and arcenciel would be around uhhhhh ummmmmmm 21??? idk man but in canon he’s probably around 30 . yes i m saying “in canon” because i wrote a really dumb and horrible story back in 2018 arcenciel used to have HUGE internalized homophobia and i turned that into a running joke and i dislike that so that’s a reason why i’m not sharing the fun little story i wrote for my friends
(the best part of that story is when arcenciel threw his light-up rainbow heelies at platano, thus starting the boss fight which the main cast LOST.)
ok back to the topic at hand. platano.
i have a whole doc named platano where i just wrote drabbles about him so i’m going to summarize them
the first one was his friend, percisi (my only cishet oc he’s very short and very aggressive while also dressing in a soft-colored turtleneck since he’s based off of peaches) using a misunderstood form of satanism to summon satan. guess what percisi and platano summoned satan for. it was a manga update! wow
i won’t say the mangas name it was an inside joke
so platano was like “hey satan can i have this manga now please please” and satan went “sure just kill people for me”
that determined platanos job for the next 7 or so years <3 wonderful.
(it was basically me writing a backstory for a scene to happen in the main writing i wrote for my friends. he killed someone because someone else in the building was trying to summon satan. very confusing but okay i guess.)
i think right after that i wrote about platano meeting his boyfriend, sage, for the first time. i have horribly mixed feelings about their relationship since it’s very. Hm.
so platano kidnaps people to watch anime with him because all his friends left him and his best friend, mangue, is too busy being a dictator over the Land of the Fruits. i shit you not fruits oppressed the vegetables. i wrote that dynamic between the two because i was learning about the revolutionary war in US History. something like that at least
(the Land of the Fruits is not the official name)
on the topic of kidnapping people. guess who his favorite person was. sage. it was sage. so he tried to take sage often but they probably discussed Proper boundaries since everyone else tried to run away. hmm i am now going to write a bit right now
“Platano,” Sage started. “Why do you keep kidnapping me? It’s rude and I hate it.”
“What else am I supposed to do?” The yellow-haired fool leaned on his sword, digging the tip deeper into the ground.
“ASK ME IF I WANT TO HANG OUT??”
“I can do that?”
“You keep making my dads worried.” Sage looked around the area, fidgeting with his hands.
“Oh. Okay. Want to hang out? Watch some anime?” Platano paused for a moment, but managed to say “Maybe kiss?” before Sage got to answer.
“I- KISS??? We can watch anime together. We can go now.”
Sage ushered Platano through a portal as fast as he could.
His dads were never worried.
hmmm maybe that’s alright idk i’m a little tired so it’s probably a little out of character. sage probably isn’t that loud but i think it was trying to be the dynamic of “oh, we’re not dating” when they kiss every sunday at 5 pm by a romantic river scene
he’s a character who is, at his very core, horrible and bad. he is portrayed in a way i DESPISE but i’m too lazy to correct it. his interest in sage actually started with me going “hmm i think platano would draw sage like this” then sauce giving me fun facts about his oc, sage, yea sage is sauce’s oc <3 epic win . so sauce gave me fun facts about sage and i was like “time to doodle these in platanos ‘art style’” when in reality it’s just the mockery of people just getting into an anime art style, with the chin so pointy it could cut a cake
i might reread my old writing from 2018. i gotta agree with the judges for that year i did not write very well
it mightve actually been made in 2017 which would be FUCKIN CRAZY im gonna check rn
yea it was started in 2018. february 14th... huh . finished it completely in june of that year it was 41 pages total and it’s not even double spaced how did i write something without double spacing it
OH MY GOD BOB IS GOING TO HIJACK THIS RANT JUST FOR A LITTLE
so bob is a fluffy little anthro cloud with a grey top hat and bowtie. he is amazing. i love bob. bob is another one of sauce’s character and mangue (mentioned earlier) was made by my friend jamie
(you can always ask for their tumblrs but i’d ask them if its okay to share their tumblrs. i might just look at them and reblog their stuff cuz i like their art!!! maybe jamie posted a drawing she made recently on her blog but tbh i don’t think she would she’s more of a twitter user)
ok so im skimming thru UMG which is the story it stands for “Universe of Magic Gardens” and it was originally made for a prank on ponytown so people would go “what’s UMG” and my friends and i would be like “ur mom gay xDDDDDD” or something like that . horrible but i’m glad i’ve changed from . that.
here’s a bit i actually like AKLJFISJFIO
“What the actual FUCK, Ilkie?!” Arcenciel cringed in fear. “Put it back- it’s too ugly.” He pointed at Platano, whose arms were crossed.
why is it bolded. anyway.
i just saw a part where eau used y’all... water cowboy moments <333 i really need to make refs for all of those old characters. all of my umg-related characters have to be my oldest-living ocs.
i cant believe this is making me genuinely reread my old writing just to go “WJHFSIDAJKSFIOJ WTF????”
some of the lines on it sound like something you would hear on like. a school bus or somethin
looking at umg like “wtf how did i add so much Meat to this writing” bc most of my writing now is mostly quotations to progress the story (like the quickie i wrote earlier. i could add meat to it but im tired lol)
OK THIS IS MORE GENERAL BUT MY FAVORITE THING ABOUT THIS WAS WRITING HAIKUS FOR PORTALS. after you visit a place enough times it’s kind of just an instinct to open a portal there so you don’t have to recite a haiku
uhh ok here’s another bit becuase im feeling like living la vida loca. ur biggest regret should be “can you tell me about him” by this point bc i’ve written too much to go back now
He landed on his face once he was outside of the hat. Meko quickly walked over to the guest room, opened the Portals for Dummies book, and flipped to a page. It looked devious.
“Banana, mango,
Each tasting amazingly.
A taste of evil.”
Meko did the dance on the page, it consisted of something that looks like it’s from an anime. A portal opened, the familiar scent of bananas and mangoes coming from it. With some hesitation, Meko stepped in. He quickly made it so only his head peeked in.
it wasnt bolded this time but i like it bolded. ok i understand how i added meat it was just shitty expired meat ALKFSJSHDAIUJKFEIODSJAK . it wasnt even that much meat DAMN. it just looked like more.
actually that’s all i will write. i could do more w platano but yea at his base he is a blonde twink who kills people because he wanted a manga but now he’s friends with a dictator. woo! wow. amazing character writing. i cant wait to get motivation to rewrite everything and make platano a good villain (he will still be very interested in anime sadly. idk why around that time i liked making characters who were obsessed with anime i didn’t even watch it much myself. i think it was because i wanted to put capes on them)
#I REALLY WENT SLIGHTLY OFF-TOPIC#like i went broader then refocused in at the end#so if you want the basics its just. right at the end#my brain's out of work mode now it's going into the deepfry machine#melon-official
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50 Questions tag!
i was tagged by @buckyland so thank you kat i am trying to procrastinate and this is PERFECT
1. What is the colour of your hairbrush? pink and purple pastels
2. Name a food you never ever eat. peanuts bc im allergic lmao
3. Are you typically too warm or too cold? too warm! im a sweaty bitch
4. What were you doing 45 minutes ago? watching a jamie genevieve makeup tutorial and wishing i had her accent because she sounds so sexy... scottish people man
5. What is your favourite candy bar? does this mean chocolate bar or like lolly bar..... chocolate would be a mars bar and lolly bar would be redskins
6. Have you ever been to a professional sports game? absoLUTELY state of origin game 2 last year baby
7. What is the last thing you said out loud? “oi shit heads do you want a coffee?” i am a stereotype
8. What is your favourite ice cream? COOKIES AND CREAM YES ME AND KAT AGREE
9. What was the last thing you had to drink? coffee
10. Do you like your wallet? i technically dont have one my cards just be loose in my bag
11. What was the last thing you ate? omg a bacon egg tomato and cheese brekkie roll it was DIVINE
12. Did you buy any new clothes last weekend? yes a bunch of sleep singlets, shorts, fuzzy socks, and a jumper
13. The last sporting event you watched? the last nrl game the dragons played before the season got cancelled
14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn? sweet and salty baby
15. Who is the last person you sent a text message to? my boss because i left my bag at work which has my nintendo ds in it and i wanna play animal crossing (dont ask why it was in my bag)
16. Ever go camping? YES i literally camped overnight in my backyard last night and i camp every year when i go to splendour with my mates (big music festival in byron bay)
17. Do you take vitamins? no and i should because im iron deficient lmao
18. Do you go to church every Sunday? oh bitch since i turned 18 and could legally say no to my crazy catholic parents i havent been to a sunday mass since. i do go for big events tho like lent, easter, christmas, etc.
19. Do you have a tan? big no
20. Do you prefer Chinese food over pizza? this is hard but i would say pizza just because ive been to the hospital 3 times eating chinese food bc of sneaky peanuts and pizza has never done me wrong like that
21. Do you drink your soda with a straw? if its with alcohol, yes. if its not, straight from the bottle baby
22. What color socks do you usually wear? black or pink. i only have Useful socks which are black and one pair of Fun socks which are pink
23. Do you ever drive above the speed limit? um every time i drive sorry popo
24. What terrifies you? being unremarkable. being forgotten. being left.
25. Look to your left, what do you see? my coffee, paw paw cream, my airpods, my scrunchie collection, my lamp, my meds, and my sunglasses (my bedside table is a mess)
26. What chore do you hate most? dusting
27. What do you think of when you hear an Australian accent? nothing.... i am australian this just be my life hahaha
28. What’s your favorite soda? soda is such a funny word to me but anyway my favourite is sprite
29. Do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive? depends, mostly drive thru and eat in the carpark vibes tho
30. What is your favourite number? 4 or 14
31. Who’s the last person you talked to? my sister and her boyfriend
32. Favourite cut of beef? i hate red meat but i will eat it in spaghetti bolognese so i guess mince
33. Last song you listened to? number one fan by MUNA - its a BOP
34. Last book you read? in the middle of reading killing commentadore by haruki murikami as i have been for the whole of 2020 lmao
35. Favourite day of the week? friday
36. Can you say the alphabet backwards? no absolutely not my brain hurts just thinking about it
37. How do you like your coffee? double shot espresso with almond milk or double shot espresso just black
38. Favourite pair of shoes? my doc martens because im ~quirky
39. The time you normally get up? during normal time i was waking up at 7:30 but now its anywhere between 9-12 lmao
40. What do you prefer, sunrise or sunsets? sunsets absolutely
41. How many blankets on your bed? three
42. Describe your kitchen plates. one full set of white ones, one full set of those blue ceramic looking ones, one set of fancy white ones with embellishment, one set from ikea that im allowed to use because i smash shit
43. Describe your kitchen at the moment? just did the washing up and loaded the dishwasher from lunch, so spotless because i have issues with dirty sinks lmao. coffee machine is pride of place, and the light above the stove stopped working last night so its kinda dark
44. Do you have a favourite alcoholic drink? t e q u i l a!!!!! or a pinot grigio
45. Do you play cards? hmm i play drinking games haha not really cards tho unless its with my family
46. What colour is your car? silver
47. Can you change a tire? yes because once i was taking an exit off the motorway at 110km/h and something fell off truck which i didnt see so i drove over it and ripped giant holes in both tires on the right side of my car and almost DIED lmao
48. Your favourite state? state of being? asleep. state in australia?? nsw dUH. state in america?? i pretend i do not see
49. Favourite job you’ve had? my job i have now! disability carer, i love the girl i care for with my whole heart and i would die for her
50. How did you get your biggest scar? i have the stupidest scars ever, my biggest scar is probably the big ones on my knees from when i was running away from this girl on camp who locked me out of our shared room and i fell over and cut my knees and hands up sooooo bad lmao
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The Shoulder Touch
Peaky Blinders
Isaiah Jesus x female! reader
Warning: none
Specifics: romance, comedy, fluff, one-shot, race neutral reader, based on a movie, gifs
People: isaiah jesus, tommy shelby, arthur shelby, michael shelby, john shelby, finn shelby, bar woman (oc)
Words: 2,399
Summary: isaiah jesus meeting you for the first time since you moved to small heath, he does the hey from spider man into the spider verse.
Authors Note: hey...so this is not an au its just like based, gave me inspiration for this fic. this is my first peaky fic so im sorry if i get some things wrong or somethings just sound stupid ur girl far from perfect. isaiah is actually one of my fav characters and miles i love him with all my heart and soul. if u havent watched spider man into the spider verse pls do urself a favor and do that rn. if you want to be tagged or request anything peaky blinders pls do loves. also this was not requested.
(not my gif! do not own!)
You were from London. Your whole life was rooted there, family, friends, every thing you’ve ever known. When you became of age to make decisions for yourself you moved to Small Heath. Every one you knew thought of you as crazy, insane to make a move to number one some where you didn’t quite know and number two (hEhheEHEehEHe im immature) some where unfortunately was more poor than you were accustomed to. You wanted to move there to find your independence. You wanted to find a simple job and live a simple life with just you yourself. All your life you were shielded away from almost everything, just once you wanted to see what the world had to offer.
But who knew it would be this hard!
“I did not realize it was going to be this bad looking.” You complained to well a goat. You were currently making your way on a boat to Birmingham. Seated with yes some passengers and also some animals you could see the shore nearby. “Well its now or never thats what I always say. Thank you for keeping me company friend.” You stood up and patted your skirt. Anticipation easing within you as you glance at the unknown.
You got off the boat and set to your new life. Yes there were some characteristics different from London but you learned to look past them. You peered down at the letter your boss had sent you. You were to start work the next day. You were a journalist, writing was your passion and seeing as this area was not so big as London than maybe you could gain popularity here.
“Its a good dream to have y/n,” you said to yourself as you headed to your apartment.
The whole day was about putting your little items you had and sticking them into your small apartment. Then since you needed food to you know live you set on going to the market not far from your living space. The day was set then with buying new outfits for your job. You did want to look spiffy! (girl thats me i wanna be spiffy naw no sticky cuz im thicccc like skippy)
Towards the end of the day you already had your dinner and decided since it was your first night here to have some fun. You made you way to a pub nearby called The Garrison. As you made your way inside you saw the majority of the people in there were...bad. You were not used to seeing these types of people. Deciding to just try to enjoy your time here you make you way to the bar.
You scanned around as you sat on a stool. Every one was mingling and you were the only odd ball. You crossed your legs all primp and proper and awaited service. A unknown woman came beside you to order her drink, “whiskey.” You admired how she looked, you could tell she knew her stuff. She seemed from around here. Her dress showed cleavage and as you peered down at your dress you thought that for this setting you needed to be a bit more out there. You examined her outfit and then yours and compared to hers yours looked like a little girls dress. You tried not to make it so obvious that you were copying her. You opened up a few buttons and awaited for her to leave to order. Your accent seemed even different from every one else’s. “Yes can I please have a whiskey as well.” You were clueless! You had never drank in your life so this was new, you just imitated what the other woman did. As you got your drink you took one tiny sip and almost spit it all out. The taste was very strong, you tried not to choke so as not to make a show. As you just endured the time there you could feel eyes behind your back.
You secretly wanted to see so you tried to look back quickly but you were too quick about it, you didn’t even get a glimpse. You could see from the corner of your eye them still staring. “What in god’s name?” You cursed under your breath as you stumbled off the stool, not knowing it was that high from the ground. Proudly got your drink and strutted to the group of men looking at you.
“Is something the matter men? I have seen you all staring at me for the past hour now, care to explain?” You sassed to the group of (delicious sexy men called the peaking puffin blinders DUHHHH) men that wore nice suits. There were a couple of them, some of them wearing the flat caps. There was a man with a neat hairstyle and a mustache, another man with his cap crooked eyeing you up and down like you were the prey. Another man with the lightest blue eyes you had ever seen, a young one with broccoli looking hairstyle (im srry finn’s hair looks so stupid!), another young one that was handsome, and another young one but he looked the most different from every one. He was dark skinned, he caught your eye. All the men looked at you sexually but all you could see was the young dark man staring into your eyes. You took a gulp feeling the bashfulness creep up on you.
“Sorry you just seem you’re not from around here,” spoke the man with ice like eyes.
“Well, you are right about that. I am not. I’m from London...actually.” You tried to sound ferocious but that just made them like you more.
“Really, London? We just were looking at you because well love you look so alone and a beautiful girl should never be alone. Names John.” He stood up and gave you a hand shake. They all introduced themselves except the one man you actually wanted to get to know.
“My name is y/n. Hey you, you didn’t say your name. Whats your name?” You smiled at him. You could tell that he was getting nervous and a bit bashful as well. He gulped and Michael had to nudge him to get him out of his trance with you. “Right well um, my names Isaiah.”
“Oooh Isaiah, what a beautiful name.” Isaiah thought his name sounded way more beautiful when you said it.
They all could feel the tension and the atmosphere of you two. Arthur coughed in order to break the awkwardness.
“May I sit?” You found the courage to ask as you stood there holding your drink. John and Arthur were about to go against you but Tommy and Isaiah both in unison stood up for you and said yes. “Why thank you.”
“So y/n, what do you do?” The raspy voice of Tommy came out.
“I’m a journalist. I love writing about the news and really I do enjoy just writing. It is my passion.” You took a sip of your drink and almost made a face of disgust. (omg i think i made that face now lol i just put in a jolly rancher but the apple one) “Wow this is strong indeed. How can you all drink that?” You cough into your hand and Arthur and John pat your back to steady yourself.
“You’re drinking the wrong thing love,” Tommy says as he hands you a glass of what their drinking.
“Right.” You brace yourself and take a huge gulp of the drink. You start coughing again and you can see that Isaiah is worried about you.
“Too strong for ya,” John laughs with the others.
“Nope, its truly delicious.” You hide yourself under the table for a second and try not to barf, “that was truly disgusting.” You whisper only to yourself.
Isaiah appears, his head under the table, “you good love?”
“Am I good, well that drink was surely not but I think I can manage. Thanks.” As you lift your head up you’re greeted with his face close to yours. “Oh hello there, Isaiah.”
Michael then went under, “um what are you all doing down here? Are we having a party?” You chuckled and got back up from under the table.
After having time to talk to the men and having a good chat you stand up and stretch, “well I think this is where I should part, it was lovely meeting you men and thank you for the drink.” You put money on the table but Isaiah puts his hand out to stop you, “no need. It was on us.”
You grinned at Isaiah and made you way to the exit but as you walked outside you heard the pounding of foot steps behind you. “Wait y/n!”
You turn around to bump into Isaiah, “whoops, yes?”
Isaiah was out of breath but he stood up straight and looked around shyly. “I was wondering, would you like to meet me here tomorrow? Just me and you, no one else?”
“Just you and me?” You pretended to give it some thought, “of course.”
Isaiah gave you a lovesick grin but then shook it off and pretended to be this tough guy, “alright, see you then.”
You walked out of plain sight and Michael came out, “look at you, you really like her a lot don’t you?”
Finn stepped out to greet Isaiah, “look at him. He’s already in love.” They both made fun of him and Isaiah shook his head, “you bastar*s.”
Isaiah’s P.O.V.
The date was tomorrow and Isaiah felt clueless about what to do with you. He was nervous.
“I don’t know there’s just something about this girl Michael. She’s different and I really like her.” Isaiah explained to him while him and Michael and Finn sat in the Shelby Parlour.
“I’ve never seen you this nervous for anything,” Finn raised his brow.
“Look I know you’re shy, I sometimes get like that with me girls but you need to only know one thing in this life,” Michael instructed him, placing his hand on Isaiah’s shoulder.
“I’m all ears.”
Michael chuckled, “do you know about the shoulder touch?”
“What? I mean of course I do, but um explain it to me again. I must of forgotten.”
“Right. When you see y/n tomorrow you waltz to her and with a dashing smile you put your hand on her shoulder and give her a sexual face saying, hey.” Michael did that to Isaiah and it took everything of Isaiah to not laugh at his friends face.
“Are you sure about this?”
“My friend its biology. Every girl, including y/n you do that to will fall at your feet.”
“So like this, I just go to y/n and say...hey.”
Michael shook his head, “no its like this...hey.” His voice became deeper.
“Heyyy,” Isaiah’s turned his voice deeper imitating Michael.
“No, hey,” Michael did it again, smooth.
“He-ey,” Isaiah’s voice cracked as he tried to be as charming as Michael.
(not my gif! do not own!)
“You’re ridiculous mate,” they all have a good laugh about it. “But you can do this, even though you’re a little rusty in some areas we believe in you.”
Finn gave Isaiah a freckled smile and nodded.
“Then I’m ready.”
End of Isaiah P.O.V.
As you entered the pub your eyes searched for the handsome face of Isaiah. You subconsciously pull your dress down and swash away any imaginary lint. Biting your lips in nervousness you spot Isaiah. Feeling all giddy you motion to him with a skip to your step, your giggle like music to his ears. You wave to him with a, “hello there.”
Isaiah sees you and with a shy grin he hands you some flowers, “these are for you.”
As you grab the bouquet your hand lightly touches Isaiah’s hand. He coughs awkwardly and you gasp in awe at the beauty he has given you, “my word Isaiah these are extremely beautiful.”
“Yeah, I got them because they remind me of you.”
You knit your brows and give a oblivious look, “oh, in what way?”
Isaiah gulped, “they are beautiful just like you.”
You laughed at his cheesy pick up lines, “Isaiah you flatter me too much, but I should say the same about you.” You come in contact with him and get as close as possible. “You handsome man.” With a leap of faith (YASSSS SPIDEY REFERENCE FOR DAYS LOSERS ITS ALL JUST A LEAP OF FAITH PEEPS) you placed your delicate hands on his chest, the fabric of his suit and his body making your cold hands warm.
Isaiah was having a nervous break down. He was trying to find what to do next with you. “The shoulder touch!!!” He thought as he pushed you back.
“Umm?” Was all you could mutter when he awkwardly, but you can tell he was trying to be smooth, placed his hand on your shoulder, “hey.” His voice deepened.
You sucked in your lips and tried to understand his motive, “um...hi?”
The breath that Isaiah was holding finally came out and he look defeated, “I’m sorry love. I’m trying to be this tough man but truly I’m not when I’m with you I get nervous and shy like a little school boy. Look what you did to me y/n.”
You made an evil grin and pushed Isaiah on the booth. Cautiously, you sat on his lap, the end of your dress pooling around his thighs. “So I make you nervous?”
Isaiah looked like he was well lets just say bust a nut. His heart was hammering so hard and fast, with a quick nod you got your answer.
You crossed your arms, “you’re so cute! You make me nervous and shy as well Isaiah Jesus (take the wheel) that makes me feel that you actually care.”
Isaiah sat up straighter, holding your waist against him so you wouldn’t fall. He placed your hand on his chest, “you feel that gorgeous? That’s what you make a man that ain’t scared of nothing do.”
“Funny our hearts match, its like they’re dancing.” You gave a quick peck on Isaiah’s cheek and sat beside him, holding his hand.
Isaiah felt now more at ease with you, rubbing his calloused hand against yours, “you’re something else y/n.”
You laugh, “you too lad!” You placed your hand on his shoulder, “I just wanted to say though...hey,” you deepened your voice.
Tag list: @harrington-lover, @angelgl16, @perfectlybeautifulsuit, @hyehoney, @haven-prelude (wont let me tag), @leasly, @totally-alexa21, @creamy-pasta-boi, @multireese, @fanfictionrecommendations-com, @prentisskelley, @malereaderforkpop (wont let me tag), @guardian-of-cookies, @justafangirl-97, @teenageshitposts (wont let me tag), @andreaoreas, @dippergravity (wont let me tag), @some-booty, @fromfoolishpeopletodeadpeople, @collectiveyou, @wtfisalltherandoms, @fangirl-4-life415
wanna be tagged in my crap? comment!
#peaky blinders#fanfiction#imagines#x reader#peaky blinders imagine#peaky blinders fic#isaiah jesus#isaiah jesus x reader#isaiah jesus imagine#miles morales#marvel#spider man into the spider verse#race neutral reader#not requested#omg i loved writing this#this was so much fun to write like i c h o k e d with laughter#the shoulder touch
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Shitty episode 49 notes
so this time its mostly dialogue. I’m not a fast typer so i definitely missed stuff and my spelling is atrocious, but I did use the break and until the live stream ended to fill in the gaps I could. This is pre and post break notes. Obvious major spoilers, lots of weird details i wrote down that matt said b/c we never know when something is gonna be important or come back/ be relevant.
Also I love Beau with all my heart.
Have fun ya nerds :)
Episode 49 Notes:
Chair has replaced uktatoa for echoes
Matts wording in the summary are so careful
Short brown hair, green and black robes necklace with circular gems lots of rings, middle aged/ young for an elf
Nott knows a place--- river bank spot
They were noted by the locals
Pretty river with shaded trees
Beau checks to see if followed 21 perception, people aren’t keeping watch but the righteous brand are gathering at the southern fields where the operatives were coming from
“What the fuck”-Jester
thanks Laura for voicing not only Jester but the entire fan base
Nott doesn’t want to leave “you can leave but i need to stay” ouch that hurt
Nott doesn’t expect them to stay
“We are a target”- Cad
“Your son????” -Jester “is it your son or are you even a goblin??”
Nott “[we don’t need to pretend we don’t keep secrets]”
Nott feels chained and not able to move forward, is ok with being open and honest so ‘we can move ahead’
Rephrase from episode one broke my heart
Nott: “Well hi, my name is Nott the brave and I’m a little goblin girl. But, once upon a time i was Veth, a young halfling woman and before that, a halfling child who grew, um, up being told that she was pretty and not brave and not coordinated and not smart and just not..
Jester line
Nott: Yea, I was. And then, ya know, time went by and i got older, i was made fun of quite a bit. I had this um, Ppl thought i was strange, b/c i collected things, i collected lots of things, they were outstanding. They were wax seals,and pieces of colored paper, and some buttons and fabric,
Beau line
Nott: All kinds
Beau line
Nott: Well they didn't think so, i had brothers and people in town who would just ridicule me
Jester: that was here
Nott: Yes, and one day i um i was playing a game with the other boys and they dared one of their friends to give me a kiss, and the boy was very nice and he actually seemed to like it and he and i became friendly and eventually did what people do and got married and he didn't mind my strangeness and i helped him get his apothecary up and running and he was a brilliant chemist and could make acids and potions and oils and bleaches for fabric for all sorts of things and he helped me. Eventually we had a baby named luke and he was a bright boy, very smart, he learned to talk very early and walk very early. Such a smart boy and that's who you saw back there is my son.
Jester: so was he right, did you die?
Nott: I think so, I think so, uh. We had a rough winter in felderwind, there were not a lot of crops and i think some of the animals had died that winter. This river i brought you to this sort of, it's a beautiful place i used to come here with yeza and it's an important place i used to come here with yeza… the goblins would come from over there, they would raid from over there [points]... They came into town and raided more and more, they took us. They took me and my husband and my child, they held us in one of their camps. I don’t know if it was days or weeks or months. Luke, he wasn’t doing well….. We ran, we ran in the dead of night, they were fast, i've been chased a lot… i told them to run… the goblins followed me and when they found me i fought, i had a vial of acid and i threw it in the face of the one trying to catch us, they took me back to the camp. I think he died from his wounds…[I think he was a type of leader] i think he had a wife. This goblin told the woman ‘make her suffer’ and they did. They brought me to this river and they drowned me in it. I can still feel the water in my lungs and in my ears and in my nose. And then nothing. Until i woke up and saw the hands.. The skin and i looked in a puddle and i could see what they made me. They made me into everything i thought i was. Not pretty, not good, just not. I'll be honest, i've started forgetting what it was like to be halfling. Just everyday just more and more goblin…. I'm sorry i didn’t tell u and im sorry i lied and i'm sorry caleb i didnt tell u. You would have understood and you could have helped me, i dunno. I feel like you're almost there like you're almost strong enough…. Anyways that's how i got to you, and that's why i got to you and why i can't be in this town. Well i only recently started signing the letters. I don't know what he would think of me. {Missed a lot here}
{nott was in the goblin clan kinda as a slave} I would clean out the messes and clean after the meals. The one [goblin] who tortured, i would help him, maybe six months. So maybe a year, no more than a year, a year and a half? I don't know exactly.
Cad can sober up Nott and Nott lets him via lesser restoration b/c alcohol is a toxin
First time we’ve seen sober nott in a while
They’re in the valley [la joke?]
The Goldfield Tavern and Lodge
Beau to Caleb: You puked all over that apothecary so something is definitely not right
Liam is so good
They headed south towards the woods for the chat
Fjord very pointedly asks if nott is ok leaving his son. He asks twice.
Caleb won’t talk in town
Edith is staying for now and nott gave her 200 gold.
No one in town knows that Veth is alive
‘I forgot what he looked like. He forgot what i looked like.”-Nott about Luke’ we need to know the ones we love.”
Beau: Nott you drowned, and you just spent three months underwater, that's incredible. I don't know if you realized that. Its incredible.
Fjord thinks Edith and Luke should leave town. Jester offers to send them to her mum. Possibly going just more west without crossing the border.
Letter to Bryce to get them somewhere safe and closer to border in case of speedy exit of the empire.
Nott admimatly wants to find Yeza
Jester via sending: “Hello, its jester. Two people incoming, a woman and child, take care of them please. Were sending money with them, it is important. Please help.”
Byrce, not really surprised: “Um alright. Ill do my best. Please don't send too many more.”
Liam trying to stay in character and not laughing at jokes during Bryce chat
Most of the righteous brand have gathered and are heading north east, leaving felderwind. People are trying to pick up and move on
Chat in wagon in back, hidden, Cad. 60 yd radius of warning if someone is gonna pass them
Beau to jester b/c they’re telling the truth now: “I didn’t sleep with dyren. She wasn’t my roommate. She was my teacher.” and she taught beau “how to kick as and take names bitch”
Jester trying to be helpful and fjord trying to be supportive
Caleb: “Your name is Veth?” “it was.”My name was Bren Aldrich Emendroot. Was. and um… I uh, i uh
Look at Laura
Jester: “Did you die too?”
Nott: “twinnies?”
Caleb: “I have been using you all.”
Jester, confused: How?
Caleb:I am from Rexingtrum. I attended Soltrace Academy. I was plucked by one of the cerborous assembly and was being trained to do the things that i fear were being done to [Yeza]. A lot a big plans for me that didn’t plan out- I went a little crazy and ran away, ran away. I have been on the run for long time. I was tired of starving. And I met you. I was a little less hungry for a while. I have been afraid for a long time, two of the people in that town are from the cerberus assembly. I don't think [the assembly members would recognise him] I walked passed that portrait many times. One of them is the head of the cerberus assembly. There's good teachers, it's everything they describe it to be. After going there for several months, one of the assembly who also would teach on occasion, started interviewing me. Calling me in and asking me questions. He sorta put me in an advanced class, me and a few others. I don't want you all to be seen with me by one of them, they will use you to get to me. You met the man who trained me. His name is Trent Ikathon.
Jester: thats why you make that face all the time
Caleb: I’m not a very good person.
Jester: “I dont think out actions don’t define us all them time. Good people do bad things sometimes bad people do good things. I think you’re a good person”
Beau: “do you care about us? You’ve told us several times you’re not a very good person.”
Caleb: im worried about your husband. I know the things that man can do.[unravels arm wrappings to show a series of small cuts going up the entirety of the right arm] He used to put crystals in… he he experimented on the three of us.
NottL what would they do? The crystals
He uhh was trying to strength us. The first time i ever saw that word was in your libraries, no explanation.
Beau: The dunamous?
Caleb: No, the first time i’ve ever seen that word was in your libraries. Haphazardly scrolled into that word. No, no everything was for the empire. We were being trained to serve the empire above all. He was mad himself, he was mad. He believed that the unwashed masses relied on their base instinct and the highest calling was to rise above the muck and control the cattlel. We were, are at war. Many of us, felt that way, feel that way.
Nott: Do you still that way?
Caleb: I don’t believe in anything, now.
Fjord: This Trent, does he know these two we saw?
Caleb: Oh yes, yes, yes. And I don’t want one more thing on my head to have you guys. Probably too late anyways.
Fjord: How powerful are these two anyways? Our normal tricks, would they fall short?
The Cerberus assembly are the most powerful mages in the empire…over 200 yrs ago a # of mages went to war in the streets of Restrum and um, it was bloody and awful and eventually came to a truce … proposed to the king at the time that they serve as an advising body to the throne.
Jester: Would they see if we were disguised? Or would they have to look for us.
Caleb: I don’t know for sure but there is a reason i didn't use something like that back there.
Fjord: So, we need to give the a very wide birth.
Nott: [why would they take yeza]
Caleb: I don’t know. It is something to do with the thing. But i don’t know why him.
[Jester reading the burned notes and meaningless stuff mostly they won’t kill Yeza]
Caleb: Was he gifted in his work? What is written about here but it does not seem like anything i ever learned about that.
[?]: It says there that they are looking for a way to achieve their ends w/o the object. I don’t know what they need.
Beau: trent ikathon was looking at yasha....
Calev: I hope he is alive i really do but they will make his life a living hell. And the empire. They are as close to as powerful if not as powerful as the king. I used a lot of names. Caleb is just what i told you. I don’t know. Caleb, let's stick with caleb for now. Um i honestly don’t know if we can, if we are up to this. Unless they are on land, this is the might of the empire. Vestduragna is the arch mage of antiquities.. She's a historian, she has uncovered mysteries of the past. She's a history buff, she's awful probably. He is the head of the military, so if they are both here i would say he is here over seeing the military and she is overseeing what is in that bag.
Fjord makes a valid point about this might not being the only one. [dodecha]
Beacons is plural
Fjord is being cautious for once
[Caleb looks like he wants to cry about the ‘liking us’ comment]
Caleb: I uhh, ohhh jester, i'm glad you see good in me.
Beau: “Its too late now b/c we like you and are invested in your happiness and [stuff]”
Caleb: ok
Beau: dont run. You can say you don't believe in us, that's fine. Believe in us just a little bit, ok?
Caleb: I will consider it heavily.
Beau: I’m sorry for not hearing you yesterday… i heard that you were doubting me and us and our friendship
Caleb:‘i dont doubt any of you
Fjord ‘I swallow shit and make it appear in my weapons i'm down to throw down. You don't have to minimize my stuff’
Those elves two were founders of the Cerberus Assembly
Stabby stab
Fjord: You seduce one i'll seduce the other. I have a way with elves [nervous/embarassed laughter]
Its like you two have been reading tumblr - tal
Caduceus is a wild mom?- confused Beau
Shit shit shit that stuff was out of the bag and scry-able for so long
Samone is the innkeeper
‘Ruckus is a word’
War with the dominion ???
Travis being charismatic and info snatchy is such a difference from grog
‘Felderwind is not known for its excitement’ with jazz hands from matt
“I need something complicated to focus myself… preferably some sort of flower or living plant. The notion is that i'm looking for something that is a testament to the wildmother.”
Jester: “Honey!”
Cad: I’m not entirely sure what honey is made of
Beau: essence of flower and bee puke
Demi leric (female human) does not charge but accepts donation, general physician
Cricks left w/in an hour “a swift nightmare”. “Dark elf folk” “second one on the left that's burned down”
Demi leric’s house is across the street from a burned building, door partially open. Simple establishment, herb smells, chemical smells, ⅘ cots with 2 recovering crownsguard chillin. Human woman, late 20s/ early 30s, bright smile & eyes, business in the eyes,
Beau used real name
“Taking statements”
A few strange complaints about 1/ 2 months back. Wave of nausea. All lived in a cluster, near the doctor’s office near a burned building
Attack around midnight
Detective beau?
Semi conscious guard, has burns, beau slaps a wound, ‘sup, names beau with the cobalt soul, what's your name?’ “Jeff” “good to meet you Jeff” jeff got Luke out of the flames “cricks got him and ran… life four of them.. I saw the fire they pushed me into when i tried to stop them… it was crazy, they came in quick.. I guess [they were targeting places].. Last place they lit was the apothecary…
TAL WANTS TO FIND THE CHAIR MAKER
Jester: What is the possibility that your mean people can change memories?
Caleb: Pretty good…
Tunnels--> North East side where the fields begin. Crownsguard near three sinkhole like entrances.
They didn’t dig them, something dug it for them. Something with big teeth dug it for them and they came out. This creature was 10 feet wide mouth. They collapse the tunnels when they left. They dug in the third one tunnel a bit. Each tunnel is 200-300 feet apart. The tunnel that was dug out was in the middle. Tunnel at a steep angle w/ rope hanging down. This tunnel kept gong 50ft before evening out at a steady downward incline. Looks organically carved tunnel rather than arcane. Definitely burrowed. Nothing on detect magic or undead.
‘Anything is possible in this world of magic and mystery’
Cad base chant to see if he can get vibration via thaumaturgy. Can very vaguely hear a gap at some point w/ very little detail.
Break
Gank
Rexintrum is the largest city in the empire
Worms
Fjord makes a valid point about the slowy thing being a great battle tactic
Fjord has limits on what he will poke/big red button comment
“The dragon poke sucked”
“Im here b/c i was out of options and i went looking for them.” - Cad
my detail oriented self is loving getting actual info from Cad
The magic that held the forest in place is fading away. Not the only site like cads but there hasn’t been communication
Cad family, bigggggggg, built the temple, they all left to look for answers, none came back, doesn’t know what direction they went in, didn’t ask wildmother about them and doesn’t really wanna know “have faith and not second guess”, Corin talked about trying to find some of the other temples. CORIN? ---> sister?
Jester “this is some serious shit… the empire is really fucked up. And everyone went through some horrible stuff
Nott: i promise if you stay with us you’ll also go through some horrible stuff
Jester:[too late already have].. I want nice again one day
Cad: I just want home back, I wanna know that its safe again
Nott: I want to be me again yes. Yes and i hope someday it can happen.
{what does Nott want to be called?}
“Or Vott”-Jester in response to Fjord prompting Nott v. Veth
Beau: Nott and Caleb it is. The mighty nein made of seven people. Works great.
Caleb “not the name not the group. I’m not it” {Not sure if i got the last part spot on the stream cut out before I rewatched/checked this}
“Their names are Chair, together they are chair.”
“I’m here to bring the awkward”- Tal
“What it Yeza’s destination pushing a few days forward?”- Cad w/ Divination to the Wildmother “Gordranas” via wind whispers
Yasha has heard the name, its far further north and the tribe avoided it b/c a lot of the beast folk lived that way ie others who wandered the wastes ‘men who are like bull warrior/bugbears/ other goblinoids’ some work with the crin.
The Luxum- something Caleb read about it having a negative effect on Gordraonas
Gordronas is important to the history of age of arcanum. When the gods walked the earth, both the prime deities and the betrayer gods there were areas of influence considered theirs. A # of those areas belonging to the betrayer gods happened to be in wildmount and Gordranas was the name of the center of their ‘tenuous union’ [betrayer gods] in the final years of the Clamity the b. Gods would go there to plot evil shit.
What remains of gordonas is where the crin has established their dynasty. People in Yasha’s tribe said it was perpetual night.
Cad on how to travel 1000 miles through a war zone“We’ve got a cart, I’m completely serious.”
One of the garrisons has been lost to the Cryn. {Ash something or rather?}
Yeza- short, even for a halfling, bushy brown hair, long sideburns, big nose, not a great chin, narrow shoulders, not a looker,
IS (not referring to Yeza in the past tense ie Nott being corrected by Jester/Fjord?Beau)
They were married five years
THEY SHOULD KNOW VETH’S ACTUAL BIRTHDAY
To Jester’s message to Yeza: No response then a very faint “Hello? I don’t know, its very dark, I have to be quiet. Thank you”
Nott being wingwoman Jester and Fjord
Jester is the best customer service person ever
Jordan and Jamenson are escorting Luke and Edith, Jeff almost kept Beau’s staff
Beau’s bo still has a bow
“I’m here to buy some pockets” “Money belts!” and the tourist necklace thingies
Secret tunnels
Fjord and Beau tag teaming it and fucking with that one guy’s pride with a few good checks
Caleb paying for a group expense
Polymorph into a honey badger (who doesn’t care)
LEVEL EIGHT
‘This won’t be a problem when I’m a president’- Sam
“Be an elk and kill all these fucking soldiers” -Travis or Fjord?
Dire honey badger? Yessssssss. Bony 6 foot honey badger, 5-6 inch claws
‘I’m gonna bless the honey badger’- Cad <3
Travis gonna kill Gil
The other side of the collapse was like 150 feet down further from where the empire stopped digging
Tunnel wides, drops off like a cliff 30-40 foot til another drop off 10ish feet later and a river that is cutting it’s way through. Crystle (quartz) stalactites from a 15’ tall ceiling
Same system as Zadash? Connecting aquifers?
“Do not send the cleric into the pit of unknown.”- Tal
Yeza and Veth never got a honeymoon and they wanted to go to Taledorie [Whitestone is great in the spring].
666
They’re going caving I guess
If Beau changes(ed) her name them all the Empire based people would have lots of names. (Bren-> Caleb ; Veth-> Nott ; Lucian-> Molly)
Also Beau and Bren are the names parents would name their kids if they wanted to have a matching letter for all their kids but the kids hate being a matched set.
Jester having the crisis of ‘I was lonely but y’all had some shit’ was really heartbreaking to watch. I hope she doesn’t stop that progression of showing more and more genuine emotion both positively and negatively.
#critical role spoilers#critical role#spoilers#god this was a good episode#so much lore#i love beau#character development#!!!#cr2ep49#it is 2:48 am#time to go caving my dudes#veth#Bren#i dont know how to spell his last name yet#beau#yasha#jester#fjord#caduceus clay#mighty nein#bryce was back@#Byrce was back!#yayyyy#alright time for bed home this is understandable
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cream of the crop pt. 1
pairing → mygxreader
genre → angst (in future parts), fluff
warnings → for this part, there are no warnings
word count → 6.6k
okAY so fyi this is unedited for now and i might come back to switch certain things up but oh my god in bon voyage there was a part where yoongi got a strawberry milkshake and i stg this was in my wip waaaay before that so when i saw the gif i think i wailed a bit bc he made it literally canon my friends!!!! hope u enjoy this guys im chwishfsdkfhl
Yoongi just wanted a god damn strawberry milkshake to release work stress. not to be grabbed by the arm by a stranger begging him to role play as some perfect boyfriend or another.
There are a variety of absurd experiences Min Yoongi has been unfortunate enough to cross within his current lifetime.
Thinking back, there was that time Yoongi picked up the phone to his childhood best friend Kim Namjoon, who thought he was being robbed by foreigners on the side of the street at one in the afternoon, and frantically asked Yoongi to please come save him by the way its the sidewalk on 44th street bring a gun!
“What kind of fucking robbers let you make a phone call, dumbass?” Yoongi barked into the phone, pretty upset that his afternoon nap was interrupted by some nonsensical disturbance.
“Oh shit Yoongi, you’re probably right,” Namjoon exhales and stays on the phone with him though, as he tries to solve the mystery of the tourists who just wanted to let Namjoon know that he had dropped a couple bills. They were discreetly carrying knives because they were opening a wood carving stand a block over, Namjoon explained later. Yoongi was quite the unamused listener.
There was another time in his already awfully long life when Yoongi himself was found caught in the middle of a fight between a Minecraft gamer and a ballerina carrying a flower vase, but that was a long story where it finally ended with him being released from custody as soon as the police had determined his innocence.
Or that other glitch in his simulation of a life when he had to bring nine cats home with him after work. Yoongi never knew he had a cat allergy, but he learned it the hard way that night as he sneezed so hard for so long till he couldn’t hear anything out of his ears.
So when Yoongi is feeling something in the air tickle his nugget of a brain that he should skip his ritual milkshake tonight and head on home right away to avoid whatever this coming disturbance is, Yoongi does what Yoongi does best, and he ignores his intuition because who cares, what Yoongi wants is his McFreaking milkshake.
Everything goes smoothly. Yoongi successfully orders a milkshake at the bar. He successfully receives the right order. He successfully starts to drink the milkshake in the quiet serenity of two am on a Monday.
But then he fails to leave as soon as she comes in the door, the same girl who legitimately flings the entrance open like some wild animal and he is so horrified he can’t look away from this scene and makes the mistake of meeting your gaze.
The damage is done, however. He knows you’ve selected him as your prey among the barren tables save for one lady picking up fries togo and the waitress staring at you in fear.
“Lady, please get off me,” he groans, pulling your fingers off his biceps as if they’re blood hungry leeches. His arm is free for maybe a second before your fingers fly back, grip stronger than before and this time Yoongi really can’t do much with just the one tired, exhausted hand; the one that isn’t holding the milkshake glass.
He’s whispering a string of curses and damnations at One Week Ago Yoongi for slacking with working out. Or any of his past Yoongis, really. He rests his head on the tips of his fingers, weighing down on his elbow angled onto the table.
“You don’t understand,” you wheeze dramatically, eyes round with terror. Uh, hello? I don’t care enough to understand, Yoongi mentally comments. “My parents, they-“
Sure, you might’ve been exaggerating everything a little, but what’s a little show and extravagance when your damn life is on the line? A matter of life and death knows no tranquility.
He looks at you half lidded; boredom and ‘are you really still talking to me Ican’tbelievetheaudacity’ washing over his face doing a whole awful lot to create a grave aura around him. You can physically see the deathly ash gray energy come off him in waves like something from an anime.
At this point, Yoongi’s thinking he might just ditch you, make a run for it to never see your crazy ass again and the idea is so tempting but instead, he responds. He’s not too sure why, although it’s probably ‘cause he’s paid an awful lot for this deliciously overpriced milkshake that has yet to be completely consumed. But the fact of the matter is he does respond, even thought you’re clearly not in the right state of mind and he really should be telling you to go home.
“Listen, they’re not gunna care if your boyfriend’s a bum. It’s your life anyways, why would they care?” Yoongi notices he’s got about another sip or two of his milkshake and then he can hightail it outta this joint and a certain spazz grabbing onto him.
You let go of his arm, thinking maybe you came off a little too strong and run your hands over your hair to pat down the flyaways contributing to the messy, crazed look.
“Now, I really absolutely must get going… miss,” Yoongi has finished his drink with a content sigh, a little disappointed that the experience was partially ruined with your improv tug of war, but content nonetheless. “Don’t worry, I’ll go ahead and take care of your water,” he reassures you dryly and stands up from the bar’s long legged chair, grabbing his expensive leather jacket. The best purchase he’s ever made in his life, he tends to overshare this fact to anything or anyone with two ears and legs, seeing as how he wears it everyday through wind, rain and the scorching heat.
Your eyes flash in one last lunge of desperation and your integrity flies out the window and disappears into the sky like a balloon. Floating away… peacefully, gone forever till all that’s left is your soulless body embarrassing yourself like this on a Monday at two am.
“Please,” you choke out one last time and sincerity taints your voice, everything you’ve depended on relying on this thin line of his consent.
There’s something about it that Yoongi finds himself hesitating for as his mind reels from the way your fingers grip the end of his jacket sleeve.
“I really, truly only need your help for a couple days. I-I’ll even pay you.”
Your eyes dart to the floor from his face with your final push, unable to face rejection one last time from help you so ridiculously need. His body halts, and with this, you take it as a sign for your fingers to relax and stop holding his like some child refusing to let go of their lollipop.
There’s one thing the weary should know, and it’s that one specific thing hits a chord with Min Yoongi that makes him who he is.
“Shit.”
Hana looks up at you in what seemed like concern and a bit of ‘damn, you live like this?’ tainting her face. You keep going back and forth between looking down at your most recent message on your phone and up to her face, still contorted in confusion unable to face the reality that is your life right now.
You’re not okay, this can’t be happening — everything you had worked up for up until this point, only to be destroyed by your parents’ wrath would be the endgame for your life. You need to lie down and forget this day even happened.
“Are you, okay?” She can’t help but emphasize the ‘okay’ with leaning her head in a tilt.
“Hana,” you squeak out, hands pressed against your eyes till you see stars. It’s late, you’re braincell-less from such last minute studying and you’re absolutely, completely fucked. And not in the nice way you normally would want to be.
“My parents are coming over and want to meet Jungkook.”
Hana lets out a strangled gurgle of terror from the back of her throat as she runs her hands through her dark hair and crawls over to you to peer at your phone screen. Now that she knows you’re fucked, you want to throw your phone out the window and run away. Or just throw yourself out the window. You stand up from your sitting position on the floor and take deep breaths counting to ten and back again.
“Oh my god,” she whispers. “You’re screwed.”
You twist your face and tell her, “Thank you so very much for the vote of confidence! I’ll just have to remember that while trying to explain everything to my parents.”
Hana’s pained smile emits an apologetic vibe as she continues to voice her thoughts. “Damn. Seriously though… what’re you gonna do, I mean. You still have… two days?”
“I don’t even know anymore,” you wail, falling back to the floor and hoping it’ll somehow open up, and take your body into the recesses of the earthy ground. “Is a day or two even enough time for him to come back from that trip?”
“Wait, you mean you would have your parents actually meet him?” Hana looks over at you incredulously. “Like, we’re talking about your boyfriend Jeon Jungkook, right?”
Backtrack – So, okay, yes maybe you had a few flaws. One of them was the fact that you were maybe a little too prideful. As in it’d physically pain you for your parents to know that your boyfriend was a bum who did absolutely nothing.
You had lied to your parents from the very beginning, pulling off the scam with a few explanations here and there saying, “Oh, no he’s too shy. He won’t take pictures!” when your parents wanted to see who this guy was. The occasional “He can’t meet up with us because he’s studying for his very big exam haha you know how these studious nerds are sorry!”
You wince from her tone, speaking as if he’s a demon sent from hell, and start collecting strands of your hair to comb through with worry.
“I mean, if he were here I could play him up as the guy I made him out to be,” you mused. “They don’t even know what he looks like. Probably think he’s afraid of cameras, poor baby.”
Hana looks slightly revolted from your gently verbalized “uwu” and snaps her fingers to garner your attention back onto the matter at hand.
“Wait- I,” you sat back up, all the blood rushing this way and that causing a weird feeling to consume you and you see black for a good three seconds before it dissipates. “Don’t judge me for what I’m about to say.”
“Done,” Hana nods. “I live with you and judge you enough already.”
You look at her unimpressed, lips curled into an unamused smile.
“How about I get a fake boyfriend? Like, right now?”
Hana doesn’t even know where to begin she laughs because she thinks you’re literally joking but then stops when she knows you’re not. “Uh, you do realize it is two am, Y/N. Where are you planning on going to look for an accomplice to role play your perfect boyfriend?”
“Honestly speaking, I’ll probably have to go to a bar or something.” Just saying this out loud was enough to acknowledge that you yourself were not thinking straight.
“You’re just going to walk into a bar and pick up the first dude you lay eyes on is what you’re implying…” Hana trails off, as she begins to re-evaluate the situation. “Are you okay?”
“No,” you sigh, brushing off your jeans as you stand up. “But this is my only option.”
“Well, you could always tell the truth to your mom and dad. You don’t have to be so full of it, Y/N. And listen, you’re 20 going on 21… how much longer are you going to hide this from your parents? You’re literally an adult.”
You frown and start walking out of the room, grabbing a jacket before you head outside and to the car. “I’m not full of it,” you defend your poor self. “I just need my parents to think I’m living my best life with the best boyfriend so they don’t rub in how they were right all this time or whatever overprotective shit they wanna pull on me.”
Hana holds up her hands as an act of surrendering and picks up your phone from the floor to hand it to you. Before it’s passed off however, a pinging sounds and she calls out the notification.
“Your mom texted you to say–“ Hana squints from how dark your phone’s lighting is. “They’re actually planning on starting to drive over tonight and should make it here by tomorrow evening?”
You start to panic, countless thoughts crashing the calm of your mind like stormy waves as you start to assess your problem at hand. You need to find a fake boyfriend, said fake boyfriend must learn what must be learned about you and said fake boyfriend will need to do a good enough job to keep your parents away forever and hopefully this will work because you don’t know what you’ll do the next time your parents come to “check up” on you because they think something’s fishy with this hypothetical fake boyfriend.
You let out what sounds like something between a sob and a groan as you snatch the phone from Hana’s hands and run out of the house, debating between driving to the nearest diner or running away from home.
See, the problem with your parents were that they were overbearing to the point that they even hated the fact you decided to attend college out of state. Mind them, it was only one state away, but it did absolutely nothing to soothe their constant fretting over your wellbeing and life. You were fed up with the relentlessly strict parental control and went crazy in college – finally dating, drinking and partying – although it was still at a good minimum.
To expose to your parents that you were dating an undecided major who spent the money he could scrounge around for on video games was a one-way ticket to hell so in order to save face and keep up the façade that you in fact were living your best life possible, you dreamt up of the littlest, white lie.
Your boyfriend was a perfect boy. One grade above you, one his way to graduating as a summa cum laude. He had an internship and was already guaranteed a job after college as a biomedical engineering major. You painted the perfect picture so you could present yourself in the best way possible to your parents.
The way your hard work was about to be shattered by the way so many coincidences piled on top of each other was a bit frustrating to say the least. You weren’t sure how you kept this a secret for so long and frankly, how your parents didn’t doubt you from the start but now they believed him to be a camera shy, facetime shy boy that only spent his time studying.
You didn’t even want to start on the numerous occasions you and Jungkook had ended a night fighting because of this ridiculous situation, that sure, you put yourselves in. You weren’t sure why you did this, but of course it wasn’t because you were too prideful.
Yoongi never lets money slip out of his hands. Call him frugal, call him thrifty, he doesn’t care. He just knows that if it’s worth the price, he’ll do it.
“Fine. I’ll do this. But I want cash and I want half of the end amount right now,” he knows he’s being demanding and it does look like you reek of eau de poor college student but with the request you’re making, he thinks it’s only fair.
You look teeny tiny and exhausted from the way you crumple your body on the seat next to him and it’s annoying how much work you’re going through because of a simple lie, but you can’t back out now. The way you’ve been explaining the situation to him is really making you sound a little crazy but hey, you’re only human and this isn’t the weirdest situation Yoongi has ever been in.
“How is this even going to work?” Yoongi looks at you as if you haven’t thought this far ahead. “Haven’t they seen his face? Is he even okay with this? Are you running a scam show? If this turns out to be a mess, I want no part of the repercussions.” He squints at you and crosses his arms, eyeing you suspiciously.
“I’m not stupid,” you roll your eyes and scrunch your face from irritation. “They’ve never seen pictures or anything of his face. I’m thankful my boyfriend doesn’t have social media, but I mean, even if he did my parents are technologically inept, anyways.”
“This is so extra, this is like, almost kind of idiotically stupid,” with a snort, Yoongi continues to doubt you. “I can’t believe I agreed to this. You better pay me the remaining amount as soon as this shit’s done. I’ve got things to do.”
“I’m sure you have so much stuff to do concerning your things,” you bite back and have to hold steady the urge to punch his weak looking noodle arm. Just keep thinking about how grateful you are that this sort of handsome spawn of the devil is agreeing to save your ass and livelihood.
He huffs and has the audacity to look offended, loosely crossing his arms across his chest. “Whatever, run this by me again.”
“Okay,” you sigh. You nearly teeter off the edge of the stool from sleepiness, an untouched glass of water in front of you and you watch the droplets trickle down the sides of the condensating cup. “My name is Y/N and yours is Jeon Jungkook. I’m 20 and you’re 21…”
You start to list off factual information and the details get a little blurry as they re-enter his mind because now it’s almost 3:20 in the morning and Yoongi just wanted a fucking milkshake but now it’s like he’s in college all over again, cramming all the notes and tidbits of information he can into his mind to purge it in five hours on the dreadful test. Even though Yoongi’s suffering, he starts noticing these things about you that’s definitely a little confusing to him and gets him a little worked up but in all the right ways.
He pays attention to the way when you laugh you move to cover your mouth with your hand, it’s kind of endearing. Sure, he’ll admit he thought you were pretty behind the air of desperation and super strange vibes you let out when you first marched into the door. Like, perhaps very pretty. He’s not sure but it might be something to do with the shape of your eyes and the pink of your lips. But the tendency you have to tilt your head when you smile is something that Yoongi starts noticing too and–
Yoongi catches himself thinking these thoughts that are so out of bounds and unnecessarily loud. It’s okay, he mentally argues. These are fake boyfriend feelings and it is late. I am exhausted, I don’t know what I am talking about.
And there you have it folks. Yoongi solves this problem of the Case of Weird Emotions with a simple answer. He’s just a really good fucking actor and can get into character so well that he starts thinking the way his character would. That’s all. And now Yoongi is mentally punching himself because he sounds really fucking weird. And fuck, he needs to stop cursing because he needs to be a well polished, dapper, perfect boyfriend.
He shudders and you see it, not because you’ve been looking at him but because he does it in a really obvious way that calls for attention in your peripheral vision.
“Are you alright?” You ask warily, eyeing him because what if he’s having a spasm attack holy shit?
Yoongi grunts with his absurdly deep voice and says, “Yeah, go on.”
“I wish we had more time,” you whine, rubbing your probably bloated face with sweater paws and something tickles Yoongi’s heart from the way you look and speak although he does his best to ignore it.
“It’s okay, I’ll remember this, I’m pretty sure… let’s just try and come up with a code word or something for me. Like, if I don’t know something I’ll say or do something and you’ll cover for me.”
You nod your head and for the first time that night it seems like you really smile and it’s cute, but not cute enough to swindle Min Yoongi’s heart. Of course not.
“Do you know how to crack your fingers?” You ask after a few moments of deep contemplation.
Yoongi suddenly looks small because he’s shoving his hands in between his thighs to cover them from the cold and you almost coo as he nods his head yes.
“Great,” you look away from his figure to calm yourself. “Just do that and then I’ll fill in. That’s the signal.”
“Does this mean we’re done now?” Yoongi’s voice has gotten raspy over the span of time you’ve spent with him because of how he spent most of it just listening to you and barely opened his mouth.
“I dunno,” you nervously gnaw on your lower lip, another habit Yoongi has picked up on fondly. Or not fondly, not at all… at least only fondly with fake boyfriend feelings. “I’m really not sure how this is going to turn out. Thankfully my friend is going to stay at a friend’s house to avoid more possible complications.”
“Alright then, give me a call tomorrow morning and I’ll get over to your place by two in the afternoon.”
You shake your head, “No, come earlier. We need as much time as possible to go over this. Remember? They’re arriving sometime that night.”
Yoongi groans from the revolting sentence he has just been forced to hear and he cries, “But I can’t! You’ve kept me up for this long evil lady, I should’ve been in bed falling asleep hours ago!”
“I’m sorry,” you feebly offer. “But I really need to nail in a lot more with you.”
Yoongi grumbles a wide variety of things under his breath comprised of but not limited to, “You’re lucky you’re cute”, “Fuck, I need a good ten hours of sleep to retain all this information, though” and “Damn it, I want my money”.
“Fine– 11 is the earliest I’ll be there. And are you sure you’re okay with giving me your freaking address? You’re going to let a stranger know where you live and you’re fine with it,” Yoongi lowers his tone towards the last bit in uncertainty.
“I’ll be fine because my roommate is a police force trainee who has armed me with a panic button along with pepper spray. You’ve been warned,” you wiggle your brows. “Plus you’re my fake boyfriend and you want the money. I’ll see you tomorrow at eleven.”
You both get up from your chairs, leaving cash tips and Yoongi’s expression changes into one of respect and newfound admiration.
“Duly noted,” he chuckles as he holds the door open for you to walk through, the brisk, autumnal air enveloping you.
Outside in the parking lot you head towards your car and see only a couple other vehicles, one of them being a motorcycle and you don’t think twice about it till Yoongi is waving goodbye to you as he walks in the direction of it.
“Wait,” you call out and Yoongi immediately halts, turning to face you with an expectant raise of his brow. “That’s your ride?” You point at the motorcycle.
He smirks and shoves his hands into his leather jacket as deep black as the galaxy and his hair swirls around from the wind above his twinkling eyes.
“Isn’t she beautiful?”
You groan, wondering if you have enough money to fork up however much it would cost to rent a car. You’re pretty sure you don’t, but if it’s for this boy, the best you could pick out on a quiet Monday morning at two, the cream of the crop, you’ve really got no other choice.
You just hope this cream of the crop has a license to drive a car.
The next morning you wake up at eight, sitting up in your plush bed as memories of last night flood your mind in horror. Restless sleep tightened your neck through the night, stress eating away at you and your ability to sleep peacefully.
You groan, peeking at your alarm clock and take a deep breath before you whip your hair out of your face and harden your resolve by sheer will. You pull of the covers and step out of your room, trailing for the kitchen in order to brew yourself some deeply needed coffee.
“Coffee first,” you mumble. Priorities.
Hana is sitting in the living room, a mug on the coffee table in front of her. She looks up as soon as she sees you enter from the short hallway.
“Mornin’ sunshine, there’s some coffee left for you,” she chippers cheerfully. “You got up pretty early. You’re meeting the man of the hour soon, right?”
“Meh, don’t remind me,” you grumble, shuffling into the kitchen and from the coffee machine, you see her kick her slippers off and finish the last of her homework. You pour the still hot liquid holy grail into your Totoro mug and start to mix in cream and sugar seeing as how you’re not as abhorrent as Hana with her love of black coffee.
“But damn, you were just a wreck last night,” Hana teases. “I can’t believe you really got someone to do something this crazy for a girl they just met.”
“It was the money,” you point out, sipping the first few tastes of coffee. It needs a bit more sugar. “I’m so fucken exhausted! Listen, I don’t even have that kind of money to pay him.” You can hear your stash of hidden cash for emergencies underneath your drawer already crying for help. This could qualify as an emergency, you doubtfully suppose.
Hana is still recovering from the surprise of hearing your insane plan worked, even if she found out last night. You remember how you entered the house, satisfied with how quote on quote smoothly the ordeal went even if you were about to be $600 short on money and stressfully sleep deprived the next morning. Hana walked out of her room with sleepy eyes and a bit of bedhead to you getting ready for bed so early in the morning, although she gained a bit of consciousness after hearing how your plan had indeed, succeeded.
Now that it’s the morning and your adrenaline rush had bled away and you’re in a clearer state of mind, doubt starts to trickle in and you are wondering what in hell you were thinking in the first place. You shake the thoughts away and focus on the task at hand.
“I’ll be getting out of the house soon,” Hana comments, starting to pack up whatever textbooks and notes she’ll need for the next day or two.
“You’re the amazingest,” you gratefully smile at her and try to convey your upmost sincerity. As best you could, at least.
“Yes,” she agrees mindlessly. “I am, aren’t I? I am so amazing—so amazing that I am literally leaving the apartment that I share with you for you and the stranger to bond and learn how to role play as lovers. It sounds crazy, I know, but here we are.”
Your smile fades away as you look at her in playful disbelief. “Go to your room, pack your granny underwear and your granny clothes, and leave this household!”
Hana scrunches her nose in distaste, “They’re not granny clothes! They’re retro! And thongs or whatever strip of fabric you claim are underwear are so uncomfortable, literally leavemealonegoodnightDevil!”
You laugh as she prances to her room to stuff her duffle bag full of clothes she’ll need in order to survive for the time she’s gone and you glance at the clock to see it read 8:30, and you go off to your room to get ready for the very. Incredibly. Extremely, long day ahead.
It is at ten that you have finished cleaning up your room, taken a quick shower and waved off Hana out of the home you two share. You walk back inside after seeing her depart safely promising to text you when she arrives, even though it’s the daytime and she’s just a good ten feet away, you never know what could happen. Even if she’s almost a police officer.
Which, speaking of, she has reminded you countlessly about, telling you to pass on the message that she will personally come to fuck him up if anything happens to you. You appease her with saying you will, but you sure as hell don’t plan on doing so.
Closing the door, you sigh deeply and it leaves you a little lightheaded as you lean your back against the door.
“Oh, shit.”
It hits you then that this is really happening. Like, your idiotic plan your brain thought up of that you thought was foolproof was really happening. There were so many holes that could expose you in a second and the thought of you being ousted in front of your parents tugged at your pride riddled mind.
The anxiety twitches your fingers as you pull up your phone and it leaves you staring at his message from last night.
yoongi: see u at 10:30
You forget he suddenly promised an earlier time at the last minute and you reckon you’ve got yourself about twenty or so minutes for him to show up at your door. It’s enough time for you to beat your face with makeup and put on some presentable clothes.
At 10:30 sharp he arrives at the door and it catches you by surprise because he doesn’t seem to be an advocate for timeliness. You tug down at your cropped sweater one last time before you open the door to see Yoongi in all his slightly bloated, freshly showered glory.
He looks a bit nervous, seeing as how he kept worrying over this very situation he should never have gotten himself into over the night not to mention what if you sent him the wrong address. Yoongi’s eyes flit from your face to the room behind you but he manages to keep his jittery
“Hey,” you sigh in relief. “Thank goodness you’re here. And thanks for coming so early.”
Yoongi loses a bit of the nervousness in his system and seems a bit more relaxed than he was when you first met him, probably because he’s gotten a better grip of his surroundings than last night, when he was completely hit with a curveball. In the face. At 500 miles per hour. In the form of you. HIs face loses the tension in the muscles and his lips take on a nonchalant smile. You also notice he’s wearing the same leather jacket as last night and you wonder if he has anything else available to wear.
“No worries,” he says in that gruff voice of his but he clears his throat quickly and yeah, you notice he’s still pretty high strung. This whole tribulation is probably a first for him too.
“Come on in,” you gesture inside, and make space for him to make through. Not that he needed much anyways being the tiny man he is.
“Alright,” he mutters, stepping into the apartment and slipping off his shoes. He doesn’t really pay attention to the apartment anymore but rather your outfit. You wearing sweatpants that still hug your legs and figure looks really good with the bit of skin exposed under the hem of your cropped Adidas sweater and Oh my God shut up, he scolds his train of thought.
It’s just that psychology of attraction at first sight, or whatever. Sure, it’s not his first time meeting you, sure, but you two have only recently met. Yoongi is certain he is a man of strong will. He would never let himself start feelings these things for someone who is already in a relationship.
He tears his gaze away from you before you can notice his burning stare and starts to run his eyes over the layout.
“Well,” you laugh strangely, trying to cover your skittishness. “This is where I live. I guess we can run over what we talked about last night over there on the couch.”
You point at the black sofa and Yoongi nods, walking over to sit down stiffly.
“Did you want something to drink?” You ask, noticing the way he stays pretty quiet. This won’t do. Your fake boyfriend is a great conversationalist.
“No, I’m fine, let’s just go over what we have to. I don’t wanna mess up…” Yoongi trails off and a hint of concern tinges his voice as you smile.
“Sounds good,” you agree.
“Okay, first things first,” you start reciting the basics as you are sat next to him. Yoongi does a really good job of staying on task at first, he swears. He’s listening intently but all of a sudden he’s thinking about how sweet and pretty your voice is and next thing he knows he’s thinking about how hard it is to just even meet your gaze, because your eyes are just such a wonderful outlet of all your emotions it’s really hard to meet them and not just go on and dive into the pool that is you and then—
“We might have to gel your hair back,” you muse softly and Yoongi is shaken out of his schoolboy crush-like trance.
“Fuck no. No,” Yoongi is firm with his decision, holding his hand out to emphasize his stance. “The forehead stays covered.”
You can’t help but let out a laugh as you cover your mouth with your hand and say, “Fine.”
Yoongi notices once again how you have a habit of doing that when laughing and he hates how it’s pretty adorable.
“How did you get here, anyways?” You ask suddenly. “Not with your bike, I hope…?”
Yoongi grins at you and you notice that he’s one of those gummy grinners and it does a little something to you but you avoid it at all costs and swallow it down.
“I Ubered here,” he said simply. “I figured I could say my car’s in the shop if your parents ask.”
You widen your eyes and nod in approval. “Brilliant! That’s really good Yoongi, thank God I don’t have to pay for a rent a car.”
“Speaking of payment,” Yoongi is reminded of your debt to him at the passing mention of money but is glowing from your praise. “Need I say more? Don’t worry about the Uber fee, I won’t be holding those against you, call it service.”
“How kind of you,” you grimace, hearing the cries of your emergency money once more, as you tell him to stay put. “I’ll be right back with half of it.”
When you count out 300 and carefully tuck the rest away, you turn around to walk out only to see Yoongi peering in your door, arms crossed and looking quite interested.
You jump at the sudden intrusion-like non-intrusion and scowl, asking, “What are you doing here? You scared me shitless and you’re very lucky I didn’t shriek.”
He shrugged, tousling his dark hair from his eyes and replied, “If I’m gonna be your fake boyfriend, I should know what your room looks like. As your fake boyfriend, of course.”
You groan and tell him, “Get a good, quick look around, because here’s your money and now we’re leaving.” You slap the wad of cash onto his unsuspecting palm and push his shoulders out the door.
“I know you kind of know me because of all the information I might’ve been burning into your mind the past 24 hours about yours truly, but I barely know a thing about you and we’re really acquaintences at best, still.”
Yoongi lets you lead him out of the hall into the living room and with a quick look at your lockscreen, you see that it’s still only 11:14. He stuffs the money in the back pocket of his jeans, which fit him quite nicely around the thigh area, if you may say so yourself.
“Fine,” he mutters and you barely catch it with your already dull hearing.
“What’s fine?” You ask, sitting down on the sofa as he takes a seat as well.
“I said, fine. What do you wanna know about me?” He asks, finding interest in the boring coffee table.
“Uh,” you trail off, unprepared for this kind of a question. “Wait, do I want to know more about you? I should be thinking of you as my boyfriend Jungkook, putting history and information behind you would make it too easy for me to differentiate…”
Yoongi rolls his eyes with a condescending sigh that you somehow know isn’t very genuine. “Just ask three things about me, so we’re not complete strangers,” he offers a compromising deal.
You let it sit with you for a second. If you made a slip up would you be able to recover? It was already hard enough, calling him Yoongi—already so hard enough that it was weird to remind yourself you’d have to be calling him Jungkook in a few hours. Eh, screw it.
“Where do you work?” You ask your first question tentatively.
“I work as a part time server for now,” he replies as if it’s something of a bother. “At the barbecue place downtown.” You have a brief idea of where it is, having passed by it a few times while you were in the vicinity.
“Alright,” you huffed. “What’s your other part time?”
Yoongi looks a bit confused at first with the way you worded it, but he catches on quickly seeing as how he’s got a fast train of thought.
“Oh, yeah. You remember my bike? I wanna go into autotech service. Or something like that, like engineering,” he vocalizes his thoughts and grows a bit red.
“That’s really awesome,” you smile at him and he grows comforted by the idea of you approving his passion. Although he shouldn’t be so—
“Do you have a girlfriend?” This question takes you back by surprise too, and you swear it was a slip of your tongue.
“I—“ Yoongi wasn’t ready, didn’t even think you were one bit interested in his love life but he answers directly. “No.”
For some reason you like hearing that answer, something like satisfaction burns at your tongue and heart and you don’t understand why when you have a perfectly cute boyfriend named Jeon Jungkook (the real one) you can call yours.
“Sorry, I didn’t know where that came from,” you giggle nervously.
Yoongi brushes it off and breathes evenly. He’s not sure why he’s worked up uncomfortably like this and he wants to skip to the part where this is all over and he goes back to moping around, living out his normal, daily routine.
We are acquaintances, he keeps reminding himself.
You two end up talking about yourselves a bit more, because pictures of your dog reminds him of his dog and from there the conversation flows a little too perfectly because now you’re intrigued by the mystery that is Min Yoongi and you want to know more and everything about him. This goes on for the next six hours and it’s filled with so much talking and laughing and you’ve even cooked up lunch because oh my goodness you found ingredients to make pancakes.
Then dawn rolls around as if it’s only been a mere thirty minutes and to be honest, it feels likes you know Min Yoongi more than your own boyfriend Jeon Jungkook.
You shake that last thought off, startled from the way you so abruptly stated that. Internally, of course.
Yoongi’s barely opened his mouth to ask you another question when-
The doorbell rings and it echoes throughout the inside of your home and holy shit it feels so intimidating and loud and Yoongi just isn’t ready, but can’t imagine how you’re feeling right now if he’s this scared of what’s to come.
You glance at him almost as if you’re seeking refuge in someone’s comfort so he grits his teeth a bit because between the two of you, he realizes he’s got to stay the rock.
Yoongi narrows his eyes until they resemble somewhat to a feline’s. He’s the rock.
And not just in the Dwayne Johnson sort of way.
oooooookay oh my goodness this is unedited but i wanted it off my shoulders before i got to work so here this is please enjoy but send me feedback or anything you'd like through my inbox thanks!!!
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