#im absolutely insane abt him i cant help it

[the-rogue-mockingjay]

Estinien for the Blorbo meme!

STINNY!!!!

Not as many boxes checked but rest assured, I love him dearly!

I am utterly deranged about him. His arc is quite possibly my favorite arc I've ever seen in any story EVER, no exaggeration.

The way he's a friend to and immediately adopts every kid he meets, how he cares SO MUCH despite his edgelord appearance, his quiet and initially begrudging friendship with Ysayle, how concerned he always is for wol when they have an Echo vision- the way he parallels them, and can understand their suffering in a way almost no one else can! Alphinaud always thinks Estinien would make fun of him for being sentimental but Estinien himself is pretty damn sentimental 😂

I love how he never addressed Ysayle by her name, odd as that sounds; the way he initially called her Iceheart in a derogatory way, but in time, when he calls her Lady Iceheart, his tone shifts to one of respect; his dialogue at the end of the Aitiascope in Endwalker, "Such was the strength of her faith in us."

In Heavensward when he calls you Warrior of Light, at first it's in a wary way, he doesn't believe the hype around you- he has to see your strength with his own eyes. His respect for you is earned, not freely given, which is a breath of fresh air when you're being swallowed up by your own legend. By the end of Dragonsong, when he calls you by your title, "I would ask one last favor of you, Warrior of Light"....the weight behind it. He trusts you. Calls you a friend. You're his equal, his comrade, partner in dragonslaying and truth-uncovering. You fight for him when everyone other than Alphinaud gave up on him, and your love for and faith in him saves his life. So in Endwalker, he fights for you just as hard and paves the way for you to do what you do best.

I am. Very much rambling at this point 😂 I could talk about this man for HOURS but the tl;dr of it is. Well. He's important to me 😭

There's a line someone says to him in Endwalker that I'm thinking about all the time:

"The fires of hatred that once burned in thy heart burneth no more. From their ashes doth spring the light of love, warm and pure."

He found purpose and meaning and a life outside of violence and vengeance, he is so surprisingly.....gentle, by Endwalker. And he's also the funniest person in the expac, no competition 😂 but in all seriousness, I HAVE MANY FEELINGS.

I'm just gonna end this post with what is quite possibly my favorite Estinien dialogue in the game, lol.

"You see the world the way you want it to be; I see the world the way it is. You are idealistic to a fault. But I know you would never turn your back on those in need, never close your eyes to their suffering. And somehow, your deeds lend truth to your words, giving the lie to my doubts in so doing. I have seen others draw strength from your belief—in Ishgard, in Ala Mhigo. You inspired them to stand up and fight. To win, no less. And even when you lost those you held dear, you carried their spirit with you, and made their memory your guiding light. The burden of so many hopes and dreams would be too heavy for most to bear. But you bear it willingly. As you have shown me, some dreams are too important to let go. If you have need of my strength, it’s yours. After all you’ve done, how could I refuse?”

[wonwoonlight]

take a chance / jeon wonwoo

Wonwoo x Reader // 1.7k words // nothing but fluff lol they're idiots

a/n: if you cant tell im absolutely insane abt this wonwoo. 100000% self indulgent and 100% not proofread as always ehe <3 v lowkey inspired also by niki - take a chance with me

He drives me crazy, it's so beyond me

How he'd look at me dead in the eye and stay unaware

Niki - Take A Chance with Me

[☆]

Wonwoo has never really been interested in romance.

When he was six and his friends started talking about girls were icky, he couldn't have cared enough to even think about girls in particular.

When he was fourteen and his close cousin who was practically his big brother told him about his first girlfriend, Wonwoo had simply nodded and congratulated him because the older guy looked like he was waiting for it even though he didn't get what's there to congratulate.

When he was seventeen and another cousin got married, he thought a little about what it'd be like to commit yourself for the rest of your life to another person.

Anyhow, now he's twenty seven and still pretty much free from the dating experience.

He just simply couldn't be bothered to try nor was he even curious enough to try.

There's too much risk. Too much things to do. Too many factors to think about. It's too complicated and Wonwoo has never been a fan of complicated.

Sure, the older he gets the more he understands about the attraction and whatnot. But the few dates that he has been on (which he could count with his two hands) was entirely due to his friends setting up with someone and his inability to say no the second time even though he did reject their so-called-help the first time around.

They eventually get the hint and stop setting Wonwoo up on a blind date.

He never sees romance as a necessity and he doesn't feel the need to have a partner, what is there more to say?

“I lost the floor 12 Abyss again.” You pout, half tempted to throw away the joystick in your hands. “I'm never playing this game again, I'm telling you.”

Wonwoo chuckles and tells you to move as he slides next to you, taking the joystick away and getting ready to restart your game.

“You just suck at this.” He teases, not minding your glare because he's way too used to it at this point. “And you say that everytime but here you are, still playing.”

“Shut up.” You pout, both impressed and unimpressed at the way he easily goes through the stages.

“Done.” He grins, all nine shining stars looking back at you.

“I hate you.”

“No, you don't.”

“I do!” You take back the joystick from him and close the window. “You don't even play this game! This is bullshit!”

He laughs under his breath and ruffles your hair, saying something about how he can't help being good at it.

You like that side of Wonwoo, as you often tell him, because people have always said that Wonwoo is quiet–that he doesn't talk a lot and it could be awkward being left alone with him.

And whilst it's not entirely untrue and you've been there too, you also know that Wonwoo is much more than his lack of words.

Wonwoo talks a lot once he's comfortable. You just need to be very patient and understanding about his silence before he gets there.

You… have been plenty patient, amongst other things.

You're patient enough to get where you are even though you've never imagined you'd get here.

Here, meaning being close enough with Wonwoo for him to be comfortable with you that he doesn't mind inviting you over to his place with no other companies.

Here, meaning being close enough with Wonwoo for him to not mind the fact that you like him and not act weird about it.

Here, meaning being close with Wonwoo despite the fact that you've confessed to him about your feelings but you're still here in his place, right next to him with not a single air of awkwardness between you two.

Turning off the Playstation, you settle on Wonwoo's sofa and decide to scroll through Instagram instead. You sigh, catching his attention, and when he asks you what's wrong, you simply shake your head no.

“What are you sighing about this time?”

This is something that people don't know about Wonwoo either: he prods when it comes to people he cares about.

Granted, he does it exactly three times to see if the other party would relent by then. He does that because that's how he is, he once tells you, because he rarely opens up at the first question but eventually cracks on the third time. That, by the third question, he's already had enough time to consider whether or not he really wants to talk about it.

“Nothing important.” You try to reassure him. “Just silly stuff.”

Wonwoo looks at you pointedly, but you simply smile and turn back to your phone, which he supposes means you don't feel like bringing it up just yet.

He closes his book and puts it on the coffee table, leaning closer to you to see what you're up to.

You wonder if Wonwoo knows what his action means to your poor, poor heart. If he's aware that, as much you said you're cool despite your confession, you still have romantic attractions towards him and confessing doesn't mean you're no longer affected by anything and everything he does.

After watching you go through your phone for a bit, it is quite easy for Wonwoo to realize what might be the core of your problem.

“You're thinking about why you're single again, aren't you?”

Your fingers freeze and so does your entire body, and Wonwoo would've laughed at how surprised you look right now, but he knows you're actually bothered by this problem from time to time though he doesn't exactly understand why.

And for someone who's observative and quite sensitive when it comes to things around him, Wonwoo can be a bit dense, still.

On what kind of universe does he think this topic would be okay to talk about with someone who literally confessed to you and somewhat got rejected though not explicitly?

“I don't want to talk about it.” You whine despite the fast beating of your heart. You honestly don't think you have it in you to talk about this with Wonwoo. At least not just yet.

“Why?”

You look at him, incredulous. “You know why.”

“Because you like me?”

You shrug, not wanting to deny it.

“Can I ask you something?” He asks, voice very gentle and careful.

“What?”

“I'm sorry if this sounds insensitive.” You press your lips together as he starts. At least, he has the conscience to know that. “But… what is it about being in a relationship that appeals so much to you?”

You pause before you answer, wondering what to say. “Do you want me to actually answer that?”

“If you don't mind answering.”

Wonwoo wonders if he makes you uncomfortable by asking such question. But if there's anyone he can ask about this, it can only be you. No one else would answer it in a way that he would understand. No one else would give him the sincerity that you'd give in your answer.

He feels bad knowing you like him and still asking you like this. But he supposes you're both close enough for that discussion, that he doesn't want to let your feelings get in the way of your precious friendship.

Perhaps he's selfish, but he doesn't want to be too conscious when it comes to your relationship with him despite everything.

“I guess it's just the fact that someone's always there for you.” You start, not looking at him even though his gaze is locked at you. “That there's this person who… you can tell everything to, from your secrets to what you feel like eating today. That when you want to do something, you can always run to them first before wondering if anyone else is available. That–”

“But that's already how we are?” He cuts you off.

You stare at him wide-eyed, wondering if it's some kind of prank even though you know he's not that kind of person.

“That's already what I do with you.” He says one more time–more firm and somewhat determined with a hint of confusion. “Why do you think you're in my place so often?”

“I… I– I don't know? You're… bored? And I happen to be free?” You stutter a little, not used to the way he's staring at you.

“I am bored.” He agrees, things suddenly crystal clear in his eyes. “But I'm bored because I don't have you around. And I want you here. That's why I asked all the time if you're available.”

You open your lips to say something–anything, but nothing comes out because your heartbeat is ringing throughout your body right up to your ears.

“You're the only person I send those posts about places I want to visit because I want to visit with you. I don't send them to anyone else. I don't even like going out all that much.”

“I… I don't understand?”

“Are we in a relationship?” He asks rather bluntly, mixing all your feelings together with one single question.

“Wonwoo, I don't think this is how you should go around it–”

“Have we been dating all this time?” He asks one more time, not even seemingly nervous about it.

He looks at you like he's expecting an answer, but how are you supposed to answer that? You've simply been happy that you get to spend time with him. You didn't think for one second that he might be into you despite all the time he asks you to accompany him somewhere and all the time you're alone in his place.

“I've been too oblivious, haven't I?” He concludes by himself, your silence doesn't deter him at all.

He reaches for your cheek, and if he notices how warm your face is, he doesn't mention it. But he caresses the apple of your cheek as he looks at you with the gentlest reflection you've ever seen in his eyes.

“I'm sorry it took me too long.” He whispers, and you bite your lip so hard to hide your smile because you don't want to be too happy before anything's decided. You're not sure what he's trying to say, your head is spinning with thoughts and your heart is beating at an erratic rhythm. “Do you mind… letting me learn a bit more?”

“About what?” You whisper back.

“Being a good boyfriend?” He smiles when you do too, feeling warmth all over his chest at how shy you seem to be. “You know I've never done this before, right? Let me take a chance with you?

You finally let yourself grin at this, no longer able to control the happiness blooming within you at whatever this might mean.

And as you lean your face more into his palm, Wonwoo thinks he's ready to take all the risks that might come together with whatever the future has in store as long as he has you by his side.

[definitelynotshouting]

the hashtag about the life series making you anxious while its ongoing is so real btw

OKAY! so my friend and i have been talking about the scarian dynamics in the life series for a while and while a lot of it REALLY hurts me (i have a very weak angst heart) ive discovered some aspects about this current dynamic that im absolutely chewing on.

SO! In limited life there was a family dynamic where Scar was the son of Cleo and Etho, and i can still see that playing out in secret life! Allow me to explain:

In the most recent episode Scar had to do the opposite of what everyone told him to do, so when grian asked him if he wanted to team, his response was very weird and "avoid"ey. Grian brought up MULTIPLE TIME in his video how "scar got really weird about teaming with me" (which to me totally reads as Grian overthinking the situation and thinking Scar doesnt like him anymore)

So anyway, Grian asks to use the enchanter and Scar says that Etho has it and he trusts Etho with it because "Etho is honest". Grian goes to Etho and Cleo and asks to use the enchanter only to find out that its NOT scar's enchanter. Etho says something along the lines of "well I dont know why Scar thinks hes in charge of our enchanter but yes we do have one" which TOTALLY sounded to me like a parent who's adult child feels a sense of entitlement to things they share with their parents (Ex. an adult child calling their parent's car theirs even though they share it).

Etho lets Grian use the enchanter and starts asking him how he's been and if hes been making any friends and the WHOLE interaction between Grian, Cleo, and Etho feels like parents trying to make conversation with their son's ex or something

AND THEN CLEO AND ETHO TELL GRIAN THEY HAVE MORE THAN ENOUGH SPACE IN THEIR HOUSE AND THAT HE CAN STAY WITH THEM IF HE WANTS BECAUSE HES TALKING ABOUT HOW HES ALL ALONE AND HE HATES WHERE HES LIVING AND AND AND AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Grian also brings up how he asked to be friends with Scar and "he got really strange about it.." and Etho went "yep that sounds about right" and Cleo agreed- WHICH SOUNDS LIKE PARENTS BEING LIKE "oh we know our son still loves his ex and everytime he talks about their interactions its awkward" LIKE THEY KNOW THAT ITS SO AWKWARD BETWEEN GRIAN AND SCAR AND THEYRE AAAAAAAAH

anyway the whole interaction to me seems like Scar's parents trying to welcome Grian back into their lives as part of the family in the hopes of setting the two of them up again because they love them both and can see how silly theyre being with all this miscommunication

do you hear me screaming

-Binge Reader

WOXNWKDNWKDNEKDNKWJDKEK WHEEEEEEEZE oh my gods i heard some stuff abt the scarian interactions this last episode and that grian teamed up with cletho but AKBDWKDNKADKSK THATS SO FUNNY HELP,,,,,,, "that sounds about right" ETHO WHAT ARE YOU TELLINGG USSSSSSSS ‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️‼️ /SILLY

This is hysterical thank u for telling me abt whats going on AKDNQKSNWKSJDBWKS gods,,,,, i cant wait to hear abt what happens next week this is insane

[zuureleena]

i drew the mercs, miss pauling, admin, and my tf2 oc on the plane to uni 😭

i did all of these a week ago and completely forgot to post them HAJAHAH miss p, the admin, and a rlly simplified ver of my tf2 oc miss lynn!! (zoey lynn hehe + js rambles abt her) under the cut

IM ACTUALLY REWORKING HER DESIGN RNNNN bcs i made her on the sims 4 LMAO and realised how much better and concise she looked, but i really wanna try and make her look like someone you'd js see irl? sooOOo tryna make her also recognisable from silhouette alone and blahablahblah tho she isn't the kind of character that would rlly make too much of a difference in the tf2 universe

i js wanted to make a loveable character LMAO who'd have more of an impact on the relationships and kinda the story?

i liked the idea of miss p having an extroverted bestfriend who's also her wingwoman bcs miss pauling is obvs an awkward lesbian mess who needs help in the love department, and vice versa bcs zoey is into scout and miss pauling is js so glad to have him move on n realise that they r better as friends!! and that he needs to be with someone who isn't annoyed by him 24/7 (IM SORRY, LWNAKS MY SELF-INSERTEDNESS GOT IN THE WAY HAHAHAHA I CANT HELP IT) also, i haven't rlly thought of any orientation for zoey... i'm thinking of her js being a het woman or js whatever u wanna interpret her as!! cuz her sexuality isn't a core thing abt her

she's an absolute harbinger of chaos who'd do anyt for money and some company (this girl has been hella lonely n stressed out of her mind and i'll explain why in an oc post🤭🤭) and even tho she never outright admits it, she does enjoy the freedom of violence she gets to have as a mann co assistant 😭 (which will ALSO make sense when i explain her background to u guys later on)

and bcs of her long experience w shady bosses and asshole customers she's had to deal within all the jobs she's had, she catches onto the administrator's whole thing with the australium fairly early into the job, but she's in tooooo deep now and is like "damn. do i get myself out of this fucked up job (that i am fucked up enough to actually enjoy) or do i stay bcs i literally have everything i've ever wanted....shit." like,, she did say she'd do anyt for money but at the cost of what 😭 [also MAN i wish we got that final comic so i can js make zoey's suspicions make sense??!?@ but in a way it js works bcs it's js this massive mystery that we don't even know of ourselves???? so likeee, im js assuming its smth rlly dangerous or smth bcs helen literally goes to the most insane lengths to get australium and finish off her final... thingy.. that uh DEBT is it... i forgot what she called it BUT WHATEVER BUSINESS SHE HAD TO ATTEND TO B4 SHE DIED QOABJASH]

OH AND YEAH, zoey hates how bossy the admin is and is an ass abt it at times, and the admin wants zoey gone so badly bcs shes an annoying little shit (which she is and honestly, her and scout can be annoying shits tgt <3) but miss p always convinces her to keep zoey BAGAHAHA and they do get things done much faster w zoey there sooOoOOo 🌝🤭

i mean she does try to kill both miss p & l anyway but still, she can't deny that they r both good at what they do

BWOSBQJS BYE I DONT THINK ANYONE IS GONNA READ THIS AHAGAH BUT THANK YOU IF U DID 😭 I HAVE SM ABT ZOEY AND I RLLY WANT HER TO BE LOVEABLE AUGHWGS

[mamawasatesttube]

YJ all living in the same dorm/frat house in college would be amazing. What do you think everyone’s majors/clubs/athletics would be?

assuming this is still like... main universe-adjacent and they all still have powers etc. yknow i think cassie has a giant existential crisis because she doesn't know what she's gonna do with her life other than be wonder girl and that will NOT fly with her mom bc helena absolutely wants her to have a normal life as much as she can. late-night conversations at the kitchen counter where she confides that she has no idea what she wants to do and helena sits with her and tells her she has time but she does expect her to go to college and do something, even if she doesn't have to have it all figured out right yet. all of this to say i think cassie goes in undeclared. also i think she should be on the volleyball team.

tim in college is smth i was actually talking abt with moss and britta just the other day. he of course is an insane engineering major who skateboards to class with a naruto-themed energy drink in hand only to fall asleep there 14 minutes into the lecture. also he's wearing a blazer and formal shorts bc he's like I Am Getting A Good Grade In Presentable Student :) and theres just something wrong with him. he has to join an engineering student study group bc its the only thing that actually gets him to bother doing his homework even if hes a whiz at the actual content. hes a disaster but he cant drop out he wants to hang with his besties plus lucius was like listen you can work at WE r&d and tinker with shit to your heart's desire but you do need at least a bachelor's of mechanical engineering to do that even if i know you know your stuff. and tim was like well i guess that's fair :/ hey squad i can sugar daddy us an apartment near met u lets all get an education

kon... well i think he also has a crisis (see also: sotm) but eventually i do like him going into teaching or stuff with kids in general. im always bouncing btwn him being a childrens librarian or a high school biology teacher. he WILL tell all these kids about star trek or so help him god. i feel like he wouldn't really go for most athletics bc he'd be too worried about making sure he doesn't excel too unnaturally BUT just for me, i think he and bart should join the ballroom dance team together. i think they would have so much fun doing jive in particular

as for bart. well the thing about bart is that he could literally do anything he wants to? the real question is what subject would hold his attention consistently over several years. i think the answer is either computer science or theoretical physics. possibly both i think he might double major. he's also terrible at remembering to do his homework etc but he flies through it when he bothers to. and he and kon join the ballroom team together :)!!!

[kyuummie]

I am absolutely insane abt c!TNT duo, and don’t have anyone irl talk to abt them :[. Pls info dump to me abt c!TNT duo and pls bestow upon me any and all c!TNT duo headcanons that u have. It’d absolutely make my day (also, ur pretty cool and I like ur Tumblr)

i am SO mad i had entire PARAGRAPHS OF AN ANSWER to this but it didnt save as a draft. TWICE. Anyways i finally decided to check my inbox..!!!!!!!!!!

And thank you! im not creative when it comes to hcs so heres ramble about metaphors and comparisons that are canonical/headcanon for ctntduo. Would base this on canon divergent interpretations but Nah

1- yin/yang

very obvious. “he is my yang”. recognizable and iconic. Two opposites which bring harmony. self perpetuating cycle of two interconnected sides.

the self perpetuating part is very important. it has always been established that they have a push and pull for everything, because they relish in the other’s reactions and its almost instinct. it all started this way too, their upbringing puts them in a very strange position slash relationship. they “balance” each other out — rather,, they teeter on a tightrope keeping them entertained and enabled . they are sides of the same coin, and complement the other. they always have a quick witty quip ready for the other’s petty insults, so so predictable. they dont keep harmony and peace between them, more so a light to keep them going similar to a smoker lighting cigarettes over and over again (insert the 10000 arts of wil lighting his cig with Qs light and vice versa. my fave ever) its close to an addiction, they need each other to keep running and flowing in the most unconventional ways they can find. if you look carefully, they are always circling enabling balancing each other

2- fire/light/burning

i like the metaphor of cwil being under the spotlight of people's perception .. sure, its cool to finally be able to see and interact with people but Q is different. he isnt and never will be afraid of wil. he is only "unpredictable" to him. freakishly enough this is also entertaining to Q. what will he destroy next? graffiti next? say next? do next? he cant help himself but to react. wil on the other hand will do anything to get a petty reaction from Q, to get his precious eyes on him that makes him burn in the light. tearing each other apart then rebuilding each other is an important component of their relationship me thinks

3- president/vice president

usually, i tjink this is a concept used to try and dethrone the other of their humongous egos and get that feeling of a win lol its all about reaction

their relationship is so interesting and weird because of the fact they wanted to over throw the other in politics — i dont think you see two POLITICAL rivals have that homoerotic tension often … anywhere! but i think its so funny that they became a version of the other further down the line (menace -> president, president -> menace) and it also goes back to the yinyang, over time and under certain conditions one can become the other because the other will always be present in the other. (like yin contains yang vice versa)

4- cannibalism Sorry /j

ok this is Strictly fanon. does this count as a headcanon i dont know.

if anyone remmeberes there was a certain point over on ctnttwt a handful of people were crazy for cannibalism ctnt go read whispers of blood and love. recently its become a not too uncommon/pretty popular characteristic for oc ships etc. of course its usually metaphorical in (ctnt) art and sometimes written but the act of giving yourself up completely to another to become a part of them goes pretty well with the psychology of ctnt/the game they play so i very much see the vision when people use this concept to depict Wil’s “devotion” (i guess? idk Refer back to ‘I am your servant’) to stay w Q in order to keep feeling that feeling of being “alive”.

it also goes hand in hand with quackitys want for power over people/things from beinng deprived of it in his earlier days. biggest stretch ever but also his capitalistic ideals to consume consume consume. and wil is willing to give him that opportunity because it is beneficial to him as well. horrible mutualism psa guys dont eat your boyfriend

these r mostly cwilbur centric mb. i also hate being wrong Which is why i hate having HCs. but why should i when theyre practically my ocs and the whole point of hcs is that theyre YOUR canon but oh well

anyone and everyone add on if u Like. Humble me if im wrong idc

[seongminiz]

plsss i’m feral😵‍💫😵‍💫😵‍💫🥴🥴 /pos

i’m going insane i have nothing else to say wtfff i could go on for hours it’s too good i need that so bad :(((((((

thinking about that trope lowkey with heeseung too tho👀 cuz like oh he would be the type !🤓☝🏻 cuz i fucking love loser ! heeseung and i love him as a dom too fuck i want him to be so mean to me ffff like i’m so sick cuz like the idea probably not the reality. ever. of getting fucked while being called a slut and degraded for how stupid i am PLS send help-

also jay is bias-wrecking me really bad rn… i have nasty ideas of being fuck buddies with heeseung but then wanting out of it to date jay but they’re friends. u didn’t know they were friends. and heeseung doesn’t want to lose access to you so he makes it very difficult :(

- 🧁 anon

it feels heeseung so well omfggg n also i feel like it feels sunghoon too a little ? or maybe im just extremely biased , who knows

fwb hee who is so disappointed that 'some loser' took u away from him. hearing jay constantly talk abt his new s/o n how in love he is with them does not help either.

until one eventful night like a month after u stopped seeing heeseung , jay is like 'hey guys meet my s/o' n who is it if not u . you try to act like nothing is wrong n seeing heeseung totally hasn't almost made ur heart drop out of ur ass , and when jay notices how tense u seem to be and asks if somethings wrong u can barely lie, excusing it on being nervous of meeting his best friends..

from that day on , hee makes it his life mission to absolutely ruin ur relationship with jay by reminding u what u left behind by choosing jay over him ..

(maybe the solution to this mess is a threesome)(the solution to anything is a threesome , really)

(the only thing a threesome cant solve is my godawful writing today idk whats wrong with me)

[baby-xemnas]

ugh i would put bepo in every dress ever. i have one dress i can never wear (on account of how insanely slutty it is) where its a black sleek evening dress with gold filigrees on the sleeves and collar but its got a PLUNGING neckline down all the way to the bellybutton, just those little rubber lines and a prayer to hold the dress over your boobs. on TOP of that it also has a low scoop back AND a high thigh slit, its barely even a dress at this point. but my god bepo in a dress like that . pink nip peeking out from the v neck... fuzzy belly window ... slit up above his hip so u can see his big thighs and his butt when he turns just right. law would never let him outside the house in such a thing a bepo of this level of sexiness is for laws eyes only but ohhhhhhhh my godddddddd i would risk it allllll

would draw this but im tired and idk what filigrees on clothing are so i'll just picture it along with u

i gotta say regarding bepo feminization i love what one cute ass lawbepo artist said abt bepo pre-ts and post-ts and how in the introduction bepo has a regular way of speaking so the artist was like - law called him cute since and bepo dialed up that aspect of himself up to 12 and im like shit i love that so much

its like a reverse of pre ts and post ts chopper - where his cuteness and mascotification i highkey hate - but with bepo its horny and stupid and he is doing it for law and thats SOO GOOD TO MEEEEEEEEEEE

i love the thought that bepo is super delibreately tailoring his attitude and serving daddy's little girl and law (who knew the man for over a decaadeee) is like yeah.....nice....

its soooo YOU FREAKY IN PUBLIC THE BOFA U

but not dressing up, that public doesnt get to see, only law. i love how its aside from being the classic hehehehe bottom feminization - theres the element of bepo doing anything for law even if he might not like the idea himself, might not be that comfortable - law loves pushing him cuz theres no limit and thats sexy and exciting that bepo will bend over backwards and then some for him - he doesnt enjoy making him unhappy ofc but bepo cant STAY unhappy because its for law..and anything for law is good

bepo feels absolutely ridiculous wearing such slutty female clothes - and he probably has trouble figuring out how to put it on cuz its just WHAT IS THAT??? A SCARF??????THATS SO LITTLE FABRIC???? law has to help him........he is so aware that he wasnt built for clothes like that and even somewhere deep may worry that captain is making fun of him...its super shameful! but law cant keep a small smile off of his face thats so adoring and appreciative that his bepo is doing it for him....so cute...so sweet..darling..and he looks great to law!! sexy and pretty and like a real trophy - that bepo caves, of course he does. he melts from having laws hands slide over him when he helps him put this ridiculous thing on - and there sure is a lot of access to open fur - bepo feels more naked than he would be without any of this..

[tojisun]

anon from the simon ask here,, sorry if the enclosure thing was to much i didn't know how else to express how insane i am for that man (⁠´⁠-⁠﹏⁠-⁠`⁠；⁠) and never EVER apologize for ranting i love it n i get it ! i don't think i ever saw my feeling so well explained in words. also, i completely understand the competence kink thing there's something so hot about a man that knows what he's doing and simon IS that man like he just looks so capable n ready for everything AND THE WAY HE CARES UGH i could cry thinking of the way he silently shows it. when i first started getting involved in cod i thought he would be this cold cold man but after watching a 5 hours walkthrough (i told you im crazy) i discovered this truly intricate character who seems like he feels so much even if he says so little HHH i just love him. for me his size was a principal attractive because duh but also i feel that it screams safety, like nothing can hurt you as long as he holds you but that could be my own conglomerate of issues speaking ┐⁠(⁠´⁠ー⁠｀⁠)⁠┌ over all, n as dumb as it can sound, he's a big source of comfort for me cuz i feel that if there's someone who could understand me it definitely him.

anyway im looking forward for the new works, i already know they r going to be amazing, and sorry for the long ass ask you can ignore it if you want <3

DONT APOLOGIZE FOR THIS ASK, IM DEVOURING IT!!! thank you for interacting back btw like oh my god i dunno how else to express how ?-$,&2$:$!: i am for this man and so seeing my ramblings be mirrored back makes me so happy 😭🫶🏼 also dont worry about the enclosure thing hahshshd made me laugh so hard, swearr

AND YOURE ABSOLUTELY RIGHT ABOUT EVERYTHING!!! theres something so fucking attractive about a man whos exceptional at what he does. the authority that underlies his competence because well you cant help but trust him; you cant help but want to trust him. AND THE WAY HE CARES??? THE WAY ITS THAT SILENT TYPE??? i (still) dunno much abt him but just like u, i thought hes those cold guys whos a lil bit of a lone wolf yk? then i found out that those dad jokes he kept cracking for soap was to ensure soap doesnt pass out because hes been shot?? i didnt expect it from him tbh but i think thats why i started spiralling harder – seeing how hes just a caring man!!!

N HHHHH THE SIZE AND HOW HES YOUR SAFETY?? ITS LIKE YOURE PEERING THROUGH MY MIND RN??? im sorry in advance bc ive been overusing this phrase but his size, on top of his personality and skills, makes me feel small but in a safe and tender way. does that make sense?? like, when he holds you, it just feels like he’s folding you within himself before tucking you in the pockets in his chest. and hhhh i cant stop envisioning the way that when he loves, it feels like safety and comfort; security and steadiness. LIKE you fit perfectly in his arms, under his chin, your face pressed on his chest where you can hear his heart beating. because he’s alive and he’s safe and he’s back home with you because he’s found a home in you. yk???

I JUST. I THINK THAT DYNAMIC SUITS HIM N YOU SM – HES YOUR SAFETY BUT YOURE HIS HOME RAAAAAHHHHHH hope that makes sm sense bc im typing this w my heart lodged into my throat and ik im rambling all over the place. im just so into him, its so 😭

“i feel like if theres someone who could understand me its definitely him” YEA. JUST, YEA

thank you so so much for ur support omg 🥹🫶🏼 im like a puddle rn its hdhjwjdjd thank you again for this ask darling <333 im sorry that my response turned out long (again) and hhhh sorry for the sporadic capslock usage 😭 take care sweetheart 💘💘💘

[twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat]

ARI IM BREAKING IN AND SHAKING YOU SO HARD RN. u think u could just drop those tags on my post AND LEAVE???!!!! im literally so giddy rn because u get it……u get it so bad

“knightly demeanour vs animalistic tendencies…gentle nature vs his violent actions” my knuckles are white im clenching my fist so hard rn because!!! ur so right there IS something just Off about the guy isnt there?? “simmering” UGH THATS SUCH A GOOD WORD like its there but it isnt so obvious at first because he truly believes hes a good person, fighting for a good cause, helping the weak, protecting vulnerable towns and villages!! but its also the fact that like that isnt really what hes fighting for deep down in his heart. im still messing with this but tell me what u think!! i think hes just the slightest bit misguided (by slight and bit i mean a lot❤️) and has no clue how to view his knighthood because he doesnt get to choose!! he doesnt get to choose who he has to raise his sword for and who he has to bend the knee for

BLARGG i got carried away but im so glad u liked the little drabble🫶🏽🫶🏽knight!sugu lives in my head rent free, im so glad someone else is crazy about him hes so hot

PEHJDJSJD MOSS????? ur making the brainrot worse pls stop 😭😭 this is gonna get extremely long i think just bear w me </3 god i adore ur take on him SO much i cant even explain it

moss. grabs ur shoulders. no because youre actually a genius. i was already sold but i never even considered how perfect a knight au is for suguru holy shit????? UR SO RIGHT. ALWAYS. he is ABSOLUTELY misguided and i think there are so many possibilities for his character in an au like this…

its so similar to his canon circumstances but also Not. and there’s that whole other factor of knighthood and honour thats so different from sorcerers because sorcerers can be (and SHOULD be) a little insane in the head but knights have to be Perfect. but then they also have to be Human and the tragedy is that u cant be both at once. (more on that later 🔥🔥 im normal abt this concept)

this is just my own take on sugu but!! i see him as like… Obsessively Moral. in the sense that he follows his own morals without thinking about anything else. almost destructively. and god moss the way that could translate into a knight au…..

just. suguru being born with so much empathy and strenght (and also that one simmering Thing that makes him a bit off) and immediately being recognized by the people around him. being branded a knight and given a sword to Protect people with. a purpose that he devotes himself wholly to, pledging himself to the protection of the people around him, and finding genuine satisfaction out of helping them (while also getting his kicks out of killing monsters bc it satisfies that one little simmering Urge he has). and the people love him and he loves them!!!

but then we get into the concept of knighthood (which im extremely normal about) and how fucked up and paradoxical it is. bc knights are supposed to Protect but also Kill. and they have to do both. suguru is given a sword to Protect people with but swords only do one thing and that is Kill. so how could he not get a little addicted to the way it feels?

its just sooo… messed up. honestly. knights are branded as heroes and saviors and theyre loved by all but deep down theyre more like dogs who have to lunge in whichever direction their superior throws a bone at. ”he doesnt get to choose who he has to raise his sword for and who he has to bend the knee for” <- LITERALLY THIS. he has to be obedient because knights are defined by Loyalty above all else and there are…. SO many ways that could fuck suguru up mentally.

him being seen as a Perfect Knight… having love for the people hes sworn himself to protect but also an undeniable love for violence…. and having no choice but to do what his king tells him to. its just bound to go wrong!! and when it does he’ll have no choice but to bear the blame alone bc thats what a good knight is supposed to do.

like im just imagining knight!sugu having a similar crisis to canon sugu in which he fails to protect someone, or has to sacrifice a certain amount of people to save more, or maybe just has to Kill something in a very gruesome way. and then slowly people turn their backs on him. maybe not entirely shut him out or anything, but now there’s this tension when he walks in and he sees a hint of fear in the eyes of the people he used to speak to so warmly.

and its just this nausea that he cant get rid of because hes spent his LIFE protecting these people. its all he knows. its what he was born for. and now theyre afraid of him? when he does nothing but devote himself to them? when all he ever did was save them over and over again? i can just imagine that contempt building up inside his stomach. slowly rotting.

and then suddenly all he can think is how ungrateful they are, how weaklings who cant protect themselves should just sit still and let him do it for them……. Yeah. i just think knight!sugu could be corrupted so easily because of how kind and moral he is (the traits that made him a Perfect Knight in the first place . throws up blood)

anyway all this just to say knight!sugu is genuinely the hottest sugu ive ever seen in my life not even kidding thank u for feeding me 🙏🙏🙏 i SCREAMED when i saw it in ur masterlist. if i saw him beat the shit out of a monster w his bare hands i would fold instantly and follow him wherever even if he went crazy and got banished <33 rip to the rest of the village but im different

[autisticempathydaemon]

Busybee my dear, hello from a fellow queer trans asain! i would love a matchup if its not too much trouble for you :3c

What song are you currently fixated on?

Oh my god, my friends and I have recently started making monthly playlists and it’s one of my favourite things to do; just curate a playlist over the course of a month!! currently its a load of fnaf living tombstone music BUT I’ve also been obsessed with The Distance by Cake? As a drummer, i absolutely adore the bass of this song!! Or Super Bon Bon by Soul Coughing has also some absolutely amazing drums!! Apart from that, I’m generally in love with everything Crane Wives BUT particularly for this month, the song Back to the Ground is so delicious!!I would put my fave lyrics but then i might have to transcribe the whole song lol. Just- the entire vibe and meaning of the song is so good (like most every crane wives song ill be honest)

Enneagram type?

Oof oh i havent done thay quiz in a hot minute but last i checked i was a 9w1 which definitely speaks to my lazy ass lol. I’m also an INFP?? I’m also a huge DND nerd so I have taken the alignment quiz and im chaotic good id that helps in any way HAHAH!!!

favourite Redacted audio?

100% the whole of avior and starlights playlist. absolutely devastating. i had to pause the playlist several times and lie down for a minute because i was so absolutely insane abt them. i love them so deeply. I’m definitely more drawn to the more plot heavy characters and arcs as compared to like ashers or davids which is more like cute couple moments (not that they dont have plot but its like. ashers playlist vs marcus’s ykyk) but that being said my favourite video of all time is probably elliots HBS video!! He is my favourite boy i will not lie i am so utterly obsessed with him and i would absolutely write pages upon pages abt why i love him and why his character is so my favourite for the ever.

fave platonic boy?

ASHER !! OR GUY!! I love silly dudes and they are peak silly boys. honestly i could see myself being best buds with Guy because we’re both so dirty minded and very clingy silly?? but there are also aspects where i would balance him out, like while i do love being chaotic i also understand the importance of just stfu and being silent every once in a while so i thunk there wld be times where there ARE shenanigans but also times where hes rambling my ears off and i can just sit. and listen. And I do love the hc that Guy plays DND and now i can absolutely imagine us playing dnd together OR binging dnd playthroughs. AND for asher, I feel like i wouldve had a crush on him because hes so like silly but also hes such an absolute sweetheart darling and hes so endearing that u just cant help but love him yk? but it wld be one of those friendship crushes that just means we end up being super close.

what gets the big boy a-snoozin?

anythin thay involved peoples voices. like straight up listenin to people talk absolutely sends me straight to dream land asap!! its kinda specific though like, if its a podcast? I can’t listen to those. the voice quality just sounds different from like a video of someone talking?? to me at least. And i can only fall asleep to videos of people talking (which is lowkey how. i got into boyfriend audios in the first place. amen insomnia). so now i have a sleepin playlist that consists of boyfriend (and girlfriend) audios, video essays about SCP’s and internet drama (shoutout to the right opinion) and also dnd playthroughs!

do u like long form video essays??

I LOVE VIDEO ESSAYS ABOUT SCP’S. i put them on when i cook!! I love ones that just talk abt the SCPs cause some are truly mind boggling and world shattering! I also listen to video essays abt youtuber drama because im not better then that and also a lot of them have quite impressive video editing!

Imaginary friends?

I think as someone who started watching horror movies at a very young age and is also super obsessed with horror movies/books now, i fully believe that if you had a imaginary friend as a child, you’re absolutely cursed and haunted and u need to be exorcised asap. (/j) no my parents were always super realistic with me and told me point blank that santa wasnt real, imaginary friends were only for mentally ill kids, and the only real big guy is the big boy in the sky. so. no imaginary friends BUT i did and still have a teddy bear (very creatively named bear bear) and i used to cry when i lost him.

i think thats it! i hope. thats enoigh haha. oh, some extra stuff abt me! I love cookin food, it’s very fun if not incredibly tiring, plus im perpetually broke, so tryin to cook up my favourite restaurant meals is also fun! I love drinks too (firm believer that every meal NEEDS to have a drink to accompany it) i’m a particularly huge fan of bubble tea (before it was cool ok) i did try to make my own bubble tea but it got really time consuming and not worth it. i love collecting plushies, i have about 10 in my room and yes they absolutely trigger my sinus but its so worth it. i love gamin and one of my first big boy buys was a gamin PC that i used to play Stray, Sims, Minecraft and most recently, FNAF! please pray i save up enough to get BG3. ٩( ᐛ )و

ok now thats really enough! thank you for this!! even if u dont get round to doin a matchup for me, thanks for lettin me ramble abt my interests :3 the questions are actually so fun hehe <333

Oh, I really like you. Not just because you gave me a lot of info to go on but because you and I have so much in common! Us queer, trans, Asian Type Nines have to stick together which is why I’m so pleased to pair you with Lasko.

I know I say this all the time, but it’s the perfect amount of similarities and differences that make a good pair in my opinion. I think your shared love of DnD, your introversion, your queer trans identity (because Lasko is queer and a whole allegory for a trans childhood, bless his heart) would be a great foundation for a solid relationship. Yet, it’s the differences that bring the spark like your love of horror where he would be squeamish or your chaotic good to his lawful.

I have such clear snapshots in my head of what your relationship would be like; if only I were an artist. You remind me of @itsdaifuku’s lovely piece of Dear as a guitarist and Lasko watching, starstruck, from the crowd; that would be you but as the drummer. I also love to imagine the two of you in the kitchen: you cooking, him mindlessly grading papers, an SCP video on, and Lasko looking up aghast when he finally tunes into what you’ve both been listening to.

Song:

I mean she even cooks me pancakes/ And Alka Seltzer when my tummy aches/ If that ain't love then I don't know what love is/ We even got a secret handshake/ And she loves the music that my band makes/ I know I'm young but if I had to choose her or the sun/ I'd be one nocturnal son of a gun

Sorry but not sorry, I’ve projected and given Lasko my elder emo taste in music. It’s cute, it’s iconic, and he’d know all the words- shyly, sheepishly joining in if you start rapping along with it as you cook. I like to imagine 2000’s emo music brings out a silly, karaoke-esque exuberance in Lasko, and then you could be silly together.

Runner-ups:

Milo is one of your runner-ups because (and I know I say this all the time too) it’s so fun to pair that scaredy-wolf with a horror buff. Everything he’s learned about SCPs has been against his will and because he loves you. Hudson is a runner-up because I’m obsessed with pairing musicians with DJ Anxiety; he’d love you and your drumming so much.

note: thank you so much for waiting 💕 I’m glad you had fun!

Read this post and send me an ask if you’d like a match-up of your own! 💌

[sunsetstarving]

ok hi i like think i talked abt your ocs with you when you first shared the slides with me but i was going through my drive and i saw it again and i was like ok wait let me look! and i now have Thoughts

- FIRST OFF nefise is like so eldest daughter immigrant trauma. if this makes sense. i also understand why she turns evil for a bit

- dani's like my fave ever btw im like so not normal abt him. just the implications of the whole being someone whos always positive and optimistic (slightly delusional) and then starting to lose all that when the world starts ending. starting to lose yourself bc youre the literal fucking symbol of hope but you cant bring yourslef to be the least bit hopeful. god. rattling him around in my brain

- pls give kore a kazoo. im begging. also a turtle fits the green theme. shes like the coolest btw and i get the whole. like wanting to be someones first chocie but you feel like theyre always going to choose someone that they can love and love them romantically and hating yourself a little bit for not being able to like ouchhh man why you gotta zir like that. ough

- TESNIS LIKE THE BIGGEST LOSER im so obsessed w her. i love that you made her a jock but also a debate kid i think thats the funniest combo. also like the whole trying to remain unchanging/constant like the "if it aint broke dont fix it" mentality but then it DOES break and DANI breaks so then she HAS to change to fix it and. arhghghgh

- felicite!!!!! dude. ok the implications of her being the symbol of chance and the fact that the symbol of chance even exists at all is so crazy to me because like yeah. sometimes it truly is Like That. sometimes things are so out of your control and you can do nothing to stop it its just pure fucking luck and fate and the univesre shifting and ohhhhh god. i am so !!!! amped abt her and skull/fibula btw

- YOOO nefise and dani. idk if youve watched jjk but they are So satosugu coded i will elaborate if youd like but this is rlly long already i might have to take this to disc

- tesni and delshad WILL drive me insane. the absolute vulnerability and horrors of being so deeply known........ ugh

- said this already but. felicite and skull chance and death like broooo the fact that something so horrible something that takes so much from ppl is so closely tied to the concept of randomness and the unknwon. driving me insane

ANYWAYSSS thats like all of it um. yes i have thoughts! anyways

HIIII okay i finally got on desktop it took me a little bit we have been going everywhere. traveling is enjoyable sometimes but also...not always lmao BUT ANYWAY ILY AUGH i've been thinking abt this since last night. HELP all lighthearted but i do not think u ever said anything!! only the discord interaction i have been waiting ever since and boy oh boy.... the personal connection to every single one of them and the way u pointed them out immediately.

YEAH nefise is kind of just Like That. it came with the territory (being the asian character i project on forever) and also like..... the turning evil bit is everything to me bc the way she regrets none of it when she thinks about it from a distance but all it took was the sliver of hesitation, the flicker of exhaustion from constantly throwing herself at every problem, to simply take her down completely and have the team lose her. Yeah

dani my beloved... he was the original knight concept too. upon seeing this i HAD to draw him being a miserable fucker (<- phone battery ran out i will send these once i can grab some pictures!!) *jeopardy voice* what is burning out from the expectation to lead your world to the future despite having none of what you're supposed to be giving

YEAHHHH YOU GET IT. the. knowing that you're not broken and that this is just you but then the people you love make it feel like you shouldn't be the way that you are, that you need to change? forever experience. and while it continues to hurt and i don't think we can escape it i think good friends are a good remedy for the pain... and also ur so right they need a turtle so bad

and AHAHAHA tesni wahoo loser overachiever asian parents' favorite child (good at everything) and also biggest problem (anger issues) of all time. also love the family drama aspect like Yeah ofc she's going to have to change and yield and give ground. she has a sibling to take care of damn it

FELICITE AND FIBULA AOUGH.... this is so funny bc i literally had no clue what she was going to be but then chance sounded good. and then i was like Oh. the Implications of this are horrific. additionally yeah i think abt it all the time.... i've been following this comic series on instagram abt the grim reaper being a kind guy bc he's the messenger, not the one who controls any of it, and like... ouch, you know? the fact that it is unfair and horrible and there is no good timing about it. that sometimes it lines up just in time for a hilarious pun. death and chance being intertwined in the most cosmically random ways but in ways that absolutely make sense.

I STILL HAVEN'T the urge to ask vs the urge to wait until i've gotten to it vs the knowledge i will Not be doing that any time soon and. i should probably ask. pls tell me more in disc i would love to hear

tesni and delshad will kill me btw. that's like. going to suck. i'm gonna be so emotions about it bc it is not something i have yet delved into but i think abt it all the time. even more family drama. all of them scrambling to adjust to some of the most awful news one can never take back. grahh or whatever

anyway. i love this i love u i am SOOO happy you sent this!!!!! i am always so ecstatic to talk about the kids they are so beloved to me fr <333

[chillychive]

Because I’m insane, I’m watching TOS. And since it seemed to be entertaining, I’m writing commentary. I take no responsibility for how incoherent this is. (Fair warning, there is swearing bc this show is wild)

Bro why were there two people walking around in street clothes? Why does she walk like thattttt

Not the doctor giving him alcohol

Also hello Una ik ur not Una yet but hello <3

This is so weird cause there’s absolutely *no* context to anything they mention. Whatever happened on Rigel, we have *no* idea about.

Ayo Pike’s horses!!

Hello Spock.

HAHHAAAA WHATTT was that a PIECE OF PAPER???? BRO WHAT CENTURY IS THISSSSSS HAHAHA

IT IS!! It’s a piece of PAPER hahahaa

Intercraft? What does that mean??

The bridge was soo tiny back then.

And i love the little goofy effects. They so silly.

Yet again, reports on paper??????? They can pilot a ship through space and go to different star systems, but they can’t send an text??

“I Can’t get used to having a woman on the bridge?” BRO WHAT THE BLATANT SEXISM IS KILLING ME. C’mon, pike, in about 60 years of real time, you’ll be on a bridge with primarily woman. AND UNA’S LITERALLY YOUR FIRST OFFICER WHAT ARE YOU ON ABOUT

The sound effects are soo silly

And the audio is killing me

Im gonna stop commenting on the obvious low budget stuff because it is *so* bad. But also so wildly impressive for a show that has such a low budget

A SPOCK SMILE IN EPISODE 1?! What is this???

Ah hello, Vina. Of course, it’s been only 18 years since the landing and Vina is very much 18 years old, and pike is very much not, but of course there’s gonna be a whole thing now. And hello talosians!!

“Prime specimen.” What

HAHAHA the way the talosian put him to sleep that was hilarious

I love how the phaser produces wind HAHA

Yo ik he just got kidnapped but that bed/couch looks so comfortable i want it

The shadow puppet aliens are hilarious

It’s so strange how in the same breath this show can have a woman in charge of the ship and then be totally sexist

Oh the transitions are SO BAD he’s not even vaguely looking the same direction as he was in the last frame

THe whip sounds on the axe im dyinggggggggg

BRO WHHAT why did she hug him like that TF ive never seen anyone do that ever

EW BARF THIS IS SO GROSS VINA WHAT

Their little goggles I canttttt

Okay turn off the lasers now ur just wasting power

ADAM AND EVE WHAT

The random music hahahhaaa

Ayo he refuses to eat so they put him in hell??? The goofy fire effects lolll

Also i wanna know about that bird species that they put in the cage. There are so few winged species in memory alpha, literally just that one that has wings made of butterflies in disco

YO its the horses and a picnic

Im so confused how this becomes the pike and vina we know from disco

“I can’t help but love you.” Ew ew this is all ew

What is happening

Literally the misogyny is weirddddddddd

What just happened.

Ayo she’s not 18 she’s actually old gross. Wait they changed that in disco i think.

EW what why do they say that abt una. I doubt any of these things are true

Literally the whole premise of this episode is pike resisting fucking one of 3 women while aliens try to make him horny

This is weird as helll

The airbag veins hahaha

“A unique hatred of captivity” bro tf

Whoa they had no idea how to make old or injured makeup. Oh wait that actually makes some sense

Bro wait so the ending is just she stays as a captive with a fake pike??

What is this

Also the lighting was so wacky

A clipboard with paper whattt

The yeoman i cant

[saddlepunk]

aaah there it is. took a few days but theres the long string of texts abt this move from my mom.

she is TRYING ill give her that, shes doing her best to be supportive, but in the middle of all that she still cant help but shift blame to my dad.

"i think you get weird ideas about how my brain works from [your father] who thinks im crazy and unreasonable for wanting to know whats happening in my house" no i think that from talking to YOU!! people used to toss around the term "simp" a lot but he's the first man ive seen who actually fits the description. some of the things shes said/done to him wouldve driven any other adult with the option to live their own life away (see: me) but he moved out like. six months ago and he still wants back in.

shes just got complete and total amnesia about most of the shit shes done to me, and i KNOW this because sometimes she admits that she thinks she abused my dad, but she cant seem to muster up more than a "i wasnt there for you" or a "things could have been better" and half the time she STILL puts the blame on my dad.

no, him being there for a hot 8 years after they broke up sucked, esp since he absolutely guilt tripped his way back in. that IS shitty. but the way things fell apart from there wasnt wholly on him, and while im sure i didnt HELP i also find it hard to swallow any time she tries to dredge up ancient sins because i was a child then.

like, if it was JUST about my dad, why get mad when i try to exist in the house unobserved? why get mad and disbelieve me whenever i say im sick? why the hundred thousand stupid bullshit accusitions because she decided what she thought happened in advance and the conversation about it is just her looking for proof. ive spent my entire goddamn life having her tell me she doesnt believe me about my own fucking emotions, SHE knows how i think and feel better than anyone and she can just PROVE it.

i couldnt fuckin wring a bad word about her out of my father, he'll always find a way to lick her ass. im acting like im trying to escape because i /am/. my beliefs abt her being fucking insane come from /living with her/ not some secret indoctrination from the first man to have negative spine.

[star-sim]

hai vanya!! i haven’t stopped by in a while so i wanted to say hi and check in bc idk how blr mutuals work even after being on here for a while..

how are u??? i’m on winter break rn godbless 😭i’ve loved all ur recents 🫶 i’m getting new glasses soon 🥳

hi peng!! don't even worry about it, i have no idea how tumblr etiquette works or what's supposed to be the "right" way to interact with ur mutuals (other than to be kind ofc!) either

so uh.... a lot has happened. i haven't rlly said anything abt it on here but i cant hold it in bc im so excited!!!

i'm going on date next week!! i met a really cute guy and we've been talking so much lately, he recently asked me out on a date and i'm so nervous. i write a lot of flirty cute fluff but i have no idea how to navigate romance irl, like i can write the most insane romantic scenes but put me in front of a cute guy that calls me pretty and i freeze up (no idea how i pulled him, i just stood there and smiled, no rizz no game absolutely no ability to pull)

like i know i said a lot of my writing is based off of real experiences, which is very very true bc half of "you've got to be kitten me" was literally just me writing an autobiography..... but that doesn't mean that i have ANY real romantic experiences!!! ... someone help me!!!

anywaysssss

i'm so jealous, my winter break was far back in december and i'm wishing that i could go back so badly

all my recents are like fever dreams to me lol, but i love them equally

i used to wear these thick and dusty glasses and someone broke them, thank the lord because they were so atrocious i don't know how anyone let me go outside looking like that

thanks for stopping by peng!!

[raisinushigher]

i wanted to do like overall thoughts posts for the last 2 batches of episodes but i never had the energy after watching them so i just didnt do it but i Really want to with these last two because Wow!!!!! spoilers duh

ok so episode 5 is definitely my favourite between the two!! as well as the overall feeling being awesome, it had so many moments that made me laugh (although episode 6 did as well) and also some of the songs were actually catchy ESPECIALLY the last one in the actual performance. and oh my god the whole thing with harriet and joan is absolutely the cherry on top i love them SO much the part where harriet said she lied bc she loves joan and then that being expanded on in the next episode…. their relationship is seriously so interesting to me they both want nothing more than to make out for it to work out and it makes for such good arguments and even better apologies. i admit i was REALLYYY scared for a second there when it actually kinda seemed like harriet and jfk really liked eachother so the scene where they actually saw wtf was going on was a huge relief and im glad in the end (well for the next week) everything is back to normal and no one’s friendship is tainted.

SIKE !!!! ok. hhrgrttg. wow i loved these two so much in episode 6 its insane. i loved abe so much in these eps but good lord this one was just so amazing. it was SUCH a good fucking representation of him, with him wanting nothing more than to do the right thing and for everyone to be happy but being conflicted with what he wants to do. SORRY FOR TALKING ABT HIM IN A JOAN CENTRIC EPISODE. she is also amazing as always and tbh i cant help but feel like tbe psylly legs thing was some sort of euphemism for autism. like look at this

overwhelming emotions being expressed physically and that making you the laughing stock of your peers and trying to mask it from everyone you meet??? Ermm guys…!

ALSO THE JANITOR APPEARING AGAIN AHHH!!! IT WAS WONDERFUL!!! AND CANDIDE DEFINITELY GREW ON ME IN THESE EPS THE MOST!!!

thats all i have to say really. now LOOKKKKK GFS REAAALLLL