#im GOING to lose my shit in some way shape or form

[frmtheroombelow]

okay so tell me yall wouldn't be losing your shit in my position at work [a work rant]

so i just did 4.5 of borderline mandatory unpaid overtime - and i say borderline mandatory because it wasn't explicitly asked of me but if i didn't do it there's no way i'd make the absolute inhuman deadline that i have for tomorrow (and im still freaking the fuck out over it bc even with all the extra work i dont think its humanly possible to achieve still but it HAS TO BE DONE)

they refuse to hire someone to assist me (im the only one at the company doing my job) and they refuse to give me a raise and have given me major excuses every time i've asked (like having to make up a new job description and go through HR and shit and this has been the excuse for 4 years - even before me)

they forced me to move teams away from my angel of a boss and now i'm making major mistakes because im doing the jobs of at least 3 people with zero fucking support AND im being paid scraps !! i'm living paycheque to paycheque bc they refuse to give me a raise !! they dont think what im doing is worth more than what i was making as a fucking summer student 6 years ago!! ITS SICK !! the person who used to do this job quit because they were burnt out !! i feel like im going insane i cant afford to quit either like haha :D imagine working so fucking hard and having nothing to show for it no savings and ur broke as fuck like whats the point !!

LIKE WOULD YOU ALL NOT ALSO GO BATSHIT INSANE

[anxiously-sidequesting]

To me personally malistaire is the funniest and most pathetic villain wizard101 has ever had AND I MEAN THAT SINCERELY!!! Between doomed children who have been manipulated, groomed, and isolated into becoming products of their environments, someone scorned who has been punished unfairly by having your biological heart torn out your chest and turning your children and all of reality against you to satiate their own ego, a nonhuman entity so powerful and so clueless they unintentionally threaten the lives of everyone around them, Malistaire FELL DOWN BRO. Like yeah you're bitchless now. You and me both. Get in line. Everyone in this room is bitchless. We are ALL living that ✨💅🏾💃🕺 Single Life™. You are a middle-aged man. Cope

[sturniolo04]

Tooth Upgrade M.S.

Bf!Matt x Gf!Fem!Reader

A/N: If you don't like the preadded name in my stories, you can either add your own name or not read it; it's up to you :)

It was a well-known fact that Nessa and Matt were known to be the most attractive couple on the internet, so says your guy's fanbase from being on social media and having a consistent social media presence. You for your music career you were trying the build and Matt having Youtube with his triplet brothers Nick and Chris.

The one thing that not only your fans found attractive about you both but also quite frankly you two were obsessed with on each other, was your teeth and Matt really was down bad for your teeth to the point where Nessa questioned if he was even listening to her during a serious conversation or rant.

Nessa for the longest time wanted to get tooth gems and finally had made the decision to do so not telling matt because she wanted it to be a pure surprise knowing he is in love with the form and shape of your smile and teeth.

Time Skip

Nessa finally made it out of the appointment absolutely adoring them considering the number of times she not only ran her tongue across the curved alignment of her top teeth but also the continuous amount of times she glanced into the rearview mirror of her car at every stop light to flash her pearly whites decorated with shiny sliver gems.

Nessa finally pulled into the driveway of the Sturniolo household overflowing with excitement, just knowing how surprised her boyfriend was going to be when she finally shows him what she did today without him knowing, for very obvious reasons that she wanted it to remain a surprise.

"hey chris hey nick"

Nessa greets the pair walking in the house finally as the both look up to be met with your cheerful spirit.

"hey where did you go and matts in his room if want to go in there"

nick simply states as Nessa nods her head.

"i had an dental appointment nothing new"

you shrug nonchalantly, hoping the pair would notice it soon enough.

"we love dental appointments"

nick jokes as you giggle. You and nick had started engaging a conversation about editing youtube videos and unbeknownst Nessa Chris was trying his hardest not to stare but he couldn't help but notice something glimmering in your mouth.

"im so sorry nessa open your mouth for a second"

chris asks confused as ever thinking his mind was playing tricks on him.

"why"

nessa giggles really knowing why as nick looks over at his brother with a 'serious' expression painted on his face.

"just please i want to see if I am crazy about something"

he huffs out as you comply and open your mouth because that is what he asked her to do.

"see anything"

nick jokes with Chris rolling his eyes.

"nick shut up show me your teeth"

chris states to his older brother and rolls his eyes redirecting his attention to nessa once again. Nessa nods at his second request taking a deep breath out and showing them your pearly whites and low and behold the big reveal.

"holy shit"

nick breathes out

" oh my god nessa that looks so good"

chris exclaims looking at nick sharing that same surprised expression.

"thanks"

you giggle out.

"so that was the dental appointment"

"yes nicolas that was the dental appointment"

you giggle out the response.

"matt is going to lose his mind when he notices that"

chris chuckles out.

Time Skip

"matt"

you hum out walking into his room finally after talking with Chris and Nick for about an hour.

"Hey my love"

he hums out replying to you shifting his attention away from his computer screen when you walk in, as you made your way over to him straddling his lap to cuddle and hug him in his chair at his desk his hands finding a place on your ass as you do so.

"how long have you been here"

matt asks simply as you have face nuzzled into his neck.

"about an hour i was talking to nick about some editing stuff.

you simply respond finally sitting up and wrapping your arms around his neck looking at him.

"oh okay well i am glad you are here I missed you"

he jokes out knowing what you are going to say.

"matt you saw me yesterday"

you giggle out as he softly runs his palms along the curve of your ass comfortingly.

"yeah but you were at the studio all day yesterday so I only saw you last night"

he chuckles as you playfully roll your eyes placing a sweet kiss on his supple and cherry-bitten lips.

"so what did you do today"

he asks finally as the moment of comfortable silence passes.

"um i went to the studio and record some stuff with my manager and I -"

you trail off in your response as you look as matt looking at you like something was wrong when all reality he was noticing your new accessory.

"what why are you looking at me like that"

you cutely giggle out leaning your forehead against his.

"n-nothing im just looking at your face and teeth continue"

he replies mumbling that last part mainly to himself.

"um okay so i also went to starbucks with madison"

Nessa continues as matt nods his head to everything you are saying but still is truly focused on your teeth and you knew that.

"i also had a dental appointment"

you huffs out as matt raises his eyebrows

"oh you did"

he chuckles out as he readjusts his grip underneath your ass to pick you up as he stands from his chair headed to the bathroom connected to his room.

"matthew where are we going"

you giggle out as he walks into the bathroom setting you on the counter in there.

"i had to pee and i knew you weren't going to get up without a fight"

he replies as you playfully rolls your eyes.

"what did you get done at the dentist"

he ask you as his made his way over to the sink to wash his hands as you climbed off of the counter to stand next to him admiring him In the clean mirror.

"just a basic like cleaning nothing special"

you reply as he notices the piece of jewelry on your teeth.

"okay thats good did you eat already"

he asks squinting his eyes to look into the mirror to see if you saw what he that he saw at first.

" yeah but it time for dinner so we can-"

"hold on ness smile for me"

matt chuckles out as he turns back to the mirror you two were standing in front of after drying his hands.

"why"

you giggle out knowing he noticed it finally.

"please for me"

he pouts as you giggle and appease him by doing so.

"no fucking way"

he exclaims seeing the sliver jewelry in your mouth

"you like it it"

you giggle turning to him.

"like it i fucking love it wait smile again"

he rambles out as you show him your pearly whites again as he groans at the sight.

" your so fucking hot"

he grunts out placing a hungry kiss on your lips as you smile into the kiss. The kiss quickly turned into a heated makeout with Matt reach his palms out to grip onto your ass pulling you towards him and lifting you onto the bathroom counter. You gasp at the quick actions as you quickly connect you and matts lips together again. As you two continued your heavy makeout you slowly lost your clothes to the marble tiled bathroom floor.

"turn around"

matt huskily breathes out as he helps you shifts your hips and body off of the counter turning you away from his naked body. You teasing sway your ass out of impatience.

"fuck"

matt groans out dragging the 'k' as his eyes trail your every curve. He reaches his hand out to caress the plush skin of your bare ass, totally captivated by it not even noticing you slightly bite your lip and showing off your new upgrade on your teeth admiring him through the glass mirror you were facing in his bathroom.

Matt finally starts teasing your slick walls with his pink tip as you let subtle gasps fall from your lips as you gain matts attention in the mirror. He makes eye contact with you in the mirror as he continues to only give you the tip knowing you were eventually going to get frustrated.

"fuck matt"

you moan out as you lower your head onto the counter you were leaning on. Matt snakes his tattoo arm to place a loving and dominant grasp on your neck tilting your head back to meet his eyes. This angle awards him the precious sight of your perfect teeth gripping your bottom lip tight underneath your teeth perfect alignment.

"is this what you wanted"

matt teasingly asks you as he allows himself to slowly bottom out inside your slick walls as your jaw goes slack nodding your head within his grasp on your neck, agreeing with the movement.

Matt begins to rock his hips to meet yours as he trails his hand up towards your mouth, slipping his point finger in between your teeth. You catching on quick lightly secure his finger between your teeth.

"god you're such a good girl"

matt groans out still admiring how well you are taking him each time his tip kisses your cervix. Matt picks up the pace of his strokes inside of your as you whine subtly letting him know you were getting close.

"fuck im g'nna c'm"

you whine out to him as he removes his finger from your mouth placing it back around your neck, craning it back to meet his gaze once again.

"y'h you g'nna c'm f'me"

he teasingly questions you already knowing the answer from how tight your walls were squeezing his dick. You slowly blink your eyes trying to maintain focus on your boyfriend feeling your orgasm getting ready to crash over your senses.

"im cumming"

you squeal out fluttering you eyes close as matt groans as your orgasm triggers his, painting your walls white. Matt releases the loving grip on your neck, pulling out of you.

"fuck"

you sigh out as you slowly turn around to face him looking at the mess you two made.

"look at the mess you made Matthew"

you giggle out looking at the floor and the counter.

"the mess i made that was all you love"

he chuckles out as he loving pats your bare ass a couple of times.

Taglist

@dirtylittleheart333 @mintsturniolo @wh0resstuff @spicymuffins03 @aaliyahsturn @stayingstromboli @emely9274

[boxjellyjelly]

Do you happen to have any headcannons regarding O'Connor and his friends? They live rent free in my head right now

Gotta admit, i do really hope they release maybe like a dlc or a short part two game that just focuses on the crew and their lives, because O'Connor and Gibbo, despite having only a few lines actually seem like they have lots of cool lore! Especially Gibbo (him talking about beasts, flashing lights etc)

Anyways! Heres a few headcanons of Gibbo, O'Connor, Trots, Finlay and Caz! **SPOILERS!!**

O'Connor

- i think lots of people think Mary is O'Connors wife, but I actually think hes talking about his daughter! Someone on the SWTD reddit said the ones who turn into The Shape are sort of traumatized or broken in some way, and the shape seems to lure/sedate its victims by making it think someone they care about is talking to them, so my mind immediately goes to O'Connor had a wife who either died or left and Mary is all he has. Poor guy :(

- I feel like he would be the type to go up to Trots when they first meet and ask if he can "see how blind" Trots is by trying on his glasses lol (he means well though!!)

- Poor man has night terrors like nobodies business. I like to think hes had night terrors the week leading up to what happens in the game about The Shape, but in very vague ways. Has probably told Trots or Gibbo about them as a joke.

Gibbo

- Again, a lot of people on reddit speculate that people who are traumatized or broken, I think his father left him or maybe just isnt a very great guy, since he tells Caz to tell his mom he'll be home soon, and since his ramblings sometimes sound like something an angry/neglectful father would say to a kid. I think Gibbo def gives off mamas boy vibes

- BIG. OLE. SOFTIE!!!! Definitely is the one who hung up all the christmas decor, and helped Dobbie with decorating their shared cabin.

- Definitely has seen some weird shit that Rennick has told him to stuff down, the "flashing lights" in the ocean, creatures that come up that he chalks up to being weird sea creatures so he can sleep peacefully at night

- I feel like in a weird way, he would survive the explosion and make his way to the main land, maybe to see his mom again or to try an find help

Trots

- I personally fucking adore Trots, he feels like the dad friend of the crew, the type that goes up to the crew when Rennick is up their asses and tells them to stand up for what they think is right.

- Always making passive aggressive comments around Rennick, Caz and Roy are always having to break the two up when they get into heavily heated arguements

- In his infected form, i think it shows a lot about the stresses he has as a union person and as a person in general. He feels like hes always having to clean up peoples messes, make sure things are working the way he should be, I feel like he puts on a composed face infront of everybody but is heavily stressed by his duties to keep everyone from getting killed

- I think he likes melancholy music :] soft and sad tunes that you can take a nap to while it rains outside

Finlay

- Can throw back shots like nobodies business, Caz and Muir are constantly doing drinking games with her and she always wins (though the hangover afterwards for her is more of a lose than anything)

- Constantly messing with Addair by getting into political battles and not giving him any satisfaction in seeing her get angry or anything, will sometimes just throw in random hyper-exaggerated takes to see him get mad

- As we seen from the paper, an absolute fucking wizard at darts, like, to the point where if shes drunk as all hell shes still able to hit multiple middles in a row

- Has nightmares too, but about her son. I cant imagine how hard it was for her to make it past the Shape hearing her son singing and calling out to her :((

- I feel like shes also pretty close with Roy, goes out for smoke breaks with him and stuff like that

Caz

- Double jointed. Maybe im just projecting onto him but the way his legs hurt from like THE SMALLEST OF FALLS is some double jointed problems shit. That being said, he totally does that bending-finger-back party trick for the crew, Trots tries to warn him against doing it but the look of disgust and suprise on the crews face will always make him do it again lol

- Was accidentally the first person to find out about Muir and Innes's relationship. He caught them kissing in the mud room, ever since then hes tried to be like,,,, overly accepting to the point where every time Innes and Muir are walking together he gives them a thumbs up like a dork

- Keeps his hair long despite Rennick and Addairs comments because Suize likes it that way (you cannot tell me Caz doesnt like getting his hair pulled lmao he is WHIPPED for that lady)

- I like to think his afterlife is him haunting his house, i know that may sound shitty but i want that man to be able to watch his weans grow up :(((

[forest-hashira]

fallon !! congrats on 100 <3 i adore you're writing and you are criminally underrated

i have a couple questions for you set in your noble blood universe :3 i have been inactive in n out for a hot second so feel free to ignore them if you have already answered them/simply don't want to

how do most people "bond" with their dragons?

what happens if a dragon and their rider have clashing personalities?

what are the strengths and weaknesses of kenji and niji comparative to each other? (ex. who is faster, is one of them bulkier while the other is more serpent-like?)

what traits about reader stands out to satoru, since it's clear he adores her more than the rest?

how common/rare is owning a dragon?

does the size of a dragon correlate to how powerful they are? (im imagining a small dragon the size of a chihuahua absolutely rocking someone's shit lmao)

ok that was all but i hope you are having a wonderful day/night!

haerin!!! tysm my love you are so so so sweet 💜 & all the spots for drabbles are still open if you want some more little writings

i think maybe i've touched on one or two of these before but i'm always happy to revisit/elaborate!!! edit: this got kinda long so i'm answering the questions under the cut haha

bonds between riders & dragons happen instantaneously the first time a dragon and writer meet, when the rider is about 10 and the dragon is just a hatchling. the bond is instant and permanent, but trust and respect still have to be built between the dragon and rider over time (like satoru told reader, the most crucial time is the first week after the bond, and riders generally don't spend any time apart from their dragon during that first week).

clashing personalities between dragons and riders are very rare, and generally only happen when the bond is formed but not supported or nurtured in any way (like, if a rider were to do less than the bare minimum to care for their dragon, or were to treat them too harshly and expect total submission without any respect in return). though most dragons & rider pairs have similar/matching personalities because of growing up together and being shaped by each other, there are a few exceptions in Noble Blood (we just haven't gotten to them yet)!

kenji & niji have essentially the same body shape/type, but between them, kenji is faster, but niji is stronger and has more stamina. much like their riders, kenji is a bit more mischievous and impulsive, while niji is a bit more stoic and calculating (though he can get a bit smug when he beats kenji in a play fight and puts him in his place). in most other aspects they are pretty equally matched.

he loves how kind reader is, and how smart. not to say that any of his other friends are stupid, because they're not, but reader has a higher emotional intelligence than the others, which he finds appealing. that, paired with reader's willingness to go along with his antics more often than not, are the biggest reasons satoru has a crush on our dear reader. unsurprisingly, these are traits that suguru has, as well.

owning a dragon is definitely the norm, and there are very few recorded instances of people who never bond with a dragon in their lives. sometimes lose their dragons to accidents or illness when they're still kids, but the vast majority of people grow up and grow old with their dragons. the only character that will show up in Noble Blood in an capacity that may not have a dragon is toji, though i haven't decided one way or the other yet.

size does have some correlation with a dragon's physical abilities, yeah, kinda like dog breeds! bigger dragons are generally stronger but not as fast, smaller dragons are generally faster but not as strong. obviously there are exceptions, and whatever power a dragon does or does not have, and whether or not they can fly also plays a huge role in what a dragon of any size is capable of. so honestly your mental image of a chihuahua-sized dragon laying the smackdown on someone is not impossible! lmao

thank you again for your ask!!! i hope life is treating you well, too 💜

[youremyheaven]

https://www.tumblr.com/youremyheaven/761885025780350976/i-hope-you-are-feeling-better-and-recovering-well?source=share

Thank you for replying to my ask. It's interesting to me that you see Sulli as a Soft Gamine because I see a vertical line & when I looked up her height she's apparently 172cm/5ft7.

Anyway, i've been doing alot better recently. I was really thinking of dropping out of university for a while but, for my own peace of mind, I want to give it another go to see if I can get it done. I was pretty much in denial about being a perfectionist but that was taking a tool on me. I hope I don't sound weird saying this and I have no doubt about your journey of recovery coming with alot if ups and downs but I hope that you are able to look back on what you have experienced and recognise how far you've come.

I knew she was tall but its not always about the literal height bc Audrey Hepburn who is THE Gamine was also 5'7 and Beyonce who is a pure R is also 5'7

height limitations exist and i get that but there is such a thing as ESSENCE which is the vibes someone gives off.

Sulli cannot be a Natural type because she has no width anywhere, she's not a Dramatic in any way, shape or form because there's no angularity, she can't be a Classic because she's not yin-yang balanced. She's not a Romantic type because she does not have prominent Yin. That leaves us with Gamine. She seems to be the Audrey Hepburn type of bambi Gamine instead of the Liza Minnelli type of sassy flamboyant Gamine.

thank you for sharing your experiences!! im glad you decided to give it another go<33!! i feel very very lucky to be where i am in life and to be recovering because i know how easy it is to lose yourself entirely and fall into some deep and fcked up shit. im so blessed truly and now im more sure and clear about my choices, my boundaries and what freedom means to me. just because you can do drugs, does not mean you should!!! there are better ways to cope with grief and trauma <333

ive come far in a month but id like to go further and put this era behind me entirely. i just want to make money, live a sorted life, travel, relax and chill out.

to anybody having a rough time. its okay. just keep going. eventually, itll get better.

someone that i know of recently committed suicide and he was only 25. i dont know what he was going through or why he did it but life is precious. time is limited. please be mindful. dont let yourself waste away. let yourself be happy.

[d1gnan]

some thoughts abt aesthetics, the way people engage with my art so far and also stuff youll be seeing from me in the next year..

first off i wanna say im not actually educated on any of this and its all just coming from personal experience/ its kind of just a mad mans rambling

im the kind of person who is always curating, always putting like with like (on a consistently changing/personal/almost random metric that spans like any kind of media , things tangible and abstract, my memories, yadda yadda (everyone does this to some degree but as an artist and an introspective person, i find it hard to just let stuff go once i form a connection. (and im sure a lot of u guys reading this are like this too, tumblr is like The website for people like this) im hyper aware of everything that ever happens to me and im always trying to connect everything with everything else

(forgive me too in advance cause ive never been satisfied with my ability to explain myself and usually i just let everything i do speak for itself/dont bother trying. im really really visual and i usually think of things In pictures too so it just frustrates me to try and describe something thats worth a thousand words..

jewelry came pretty quickly to me as a favorite art form because its a way to convey some of what goes on in my head when i engage with the media i like , being able to turn all these pretty abstract feelings into colors shapes symbols.. a lot of times when i listen to something or watch something, i get almost itchy with the feeling of needing to get the way i percieved it out into the world in a visual and tangible way asap before it loses its original shape or before i forget how it made me feel. (dementia runs in my family so a lot of my art is trying to archive my feelings since i know i wont have them forever.. its almost a frantic need to be seen/known by others before its too late.

a lot of the jewelry ive custom made for people has been specifically music and film related, and thats been a great thing because i can both 1) make something that satisfies my own vision of the thing but 2) it is still easily readable by others as related 2 the source material because the design language usually is distinct enough to withstand being skewed too much by my own personal associations

moving forward tho, i have a TON of ideas for way more personal/abstract/highly conceptual projects, and have been slowly gathering pieces so that i can do full justice to my vision for them.

doing this has first and foremost always been an art form/way to express myself . i do it because of the ideas, i do it because i have to do it, and then im left with a bunch of stuff that i would like way more to be in the hands of someone who relates to it. and, i do it in a way thats not at all good for being a business owner. if i'm going to create a product, i would be going against my ideals if i didnt try to battle with all the things i hate about products. fast fashion and aliexpress craft supplies and mass production.. (to have a successful business you need a lot of the same product, it needs to be easy to make and you need to be able to get your materials cheap. all of which i can't and wouldn't do, so it's a very shit thing to attempt to make a living off of..

maybe this sounds a little funny too when you look at my work and then at what i have to say about it.that i think about it so seriously since it's something any one can do. my kid sister makes jewelry, it's a pretty accesible hobby. the idea of making jewelry based off of media is also the furthest thing from unique, which brings me thinking about the reception of my art online so far, and some weird stuff i've noticed.

when you're making anything that you mention is directly "inspired by" something else, you run into some pretty weird habits from others online, and a kind of unique way of engaging with "aesthetics" thats started in the past couple years. what im talking about now is less movies/music. its stuff that blurs the line between an existing body of work to reference and just a concept. ( y2k, fill in the blank-core, frutiger metro/aero).. i'm really into most eras of these fashion / design trends/aesthetics in a historian/archivist kind of way, and i really enjoy to do work inspired by things like this, but these are always way more personally influenced than anything made for a movie/music. i went semi-viral (feels so dumb to say seriously lol) on tiktok for a frutiger metro/sleepyhead by passion pit inspired bracelet.

i get hate on most posts on tiktok since its a gigantic platform(as well as praise) but the majority of comments always tend to be people correcting the authenticity to the aesthetic ive listed as an inspiration. people way smarter than me have way better things to say on this, and if i tried to go too into detail with it this post would be even crazy longer, but ive seen people call it "what aesthetic is this" culture, (some examples of this: " "this aesthetic is called this, not that" "this aesthetic is from this time frame only" xyz

i never know what to do, because i want to respond by explaining that i see these aesthetic names/labeling system solely as a tool. to help people find and connect like with like. labeling aesthetics is just recognizing a pattern. knowing the "name" of an aesthetic can help you find similar things, but there are no set time periods to any of this unless you are specifically making something that is an exact recreation of something else or making a period piece. everything comes back in some way over and over again. rigidly defining aesthetics is flawed/missing the point because aesthetics are completely individual/unmeasurable/skewed by experiences/memories/opinions. its a little different too when it comes to stuff thats actually like made For marketing cause that Will have an exact language that goes with it or whatever, but most of the time i see people arguing about an aesthetic thats not even applicable. there are genuinely no rules to what fits an aesthetic because anything you create, you add your own experiences to and are effectively continuing these patterns in a new way/ sometimes creating a whole new movement or sub category if you are really into labeling it as something directly. peoples personal art is definitely affected by their time/whatever the common design language was at the time, so thats where a lot of the names get born, but when you make it this rigid thing , "this needs to be more like this.. this needs to be more like that.." you'd be right- but only in the sense that yes, it IS that way, For You. in your mind you experience it that way, it is your personal relation to seeing these patterns. and you can use these aesthetic tools to expand on what was done before you, you can use these images to convey your own perspective so that i can try to understand it.

marketing vs personal aesthetics is a different thing that idk how to tackle with my like super limited language but for example, when someone is using a popular aesthetic to sell you something, you can tell. it's shallow and impersonal. looking back on ads that are dated and use a certain aesthetic usually tinges them with nostalgia that you can take and make into something that it wasn't because you have this priceless new angle to look at it with. if you believe in aesthetics as being this rigid thing, you dont get new ideas, you dont get new sub aesthetics, you dont get new movements, you get a copy of a copy, you get shein clothes. and! anyone can call anything they want an "aesthetic" ..any collection of things together influenced by anything in the world can be an entirely new aesthetic.. and im so sick of typing the word aesthetic

but i know that if theyre commenting something like this, they r so fundamentally different from me/ engage with the world in such a different way then i do that it would be a waste of time to try to explain..

i am a little scared when i launch some of the new projects i've been working on they'll be met with this kind of reaction. maybe ill try to write some kind of TLDR, some kind of zine to send along with any of my bracelets, some kind of manifesto about sustainability/personalization/mindful consumpution.. but it takes a long time for me to feel good about explaining myself, even this post ive deleted and restarted countless times.

ill post some more about some of the "aesthetics " (i gotta figure out better language for this shit i swear to god) ive found inspiring that have heavily influenced these upcoming projects, as well as scans from books ive collected that match the design language and i definitely want to release kind of a companion zine with the collections that include music/fashion/home photos etc...

if u have any thoughts or anything about any of this id love to hear it, or answer questions or expand on shit, this is kind of just like a word version of me throwing mac and cheese up at the ceiling and seeing if anything sticks.

thanks to anyone whos said anything nice about my stuff, i love u guys more than lyfe

and if you read all of this youre a g

💚

[1nvad3rz1m]

10 12 16 18 21 25

10. worst part of fanon

whatever the fuck florpus did to dib interpretation he doesnt listen to cavetown or lemon demon and he doesnt have hello kitty bandaids and he doesnt chase the approval of anyone he is just a selfish asshole bastard who wants to get revenge and be right.

12. the unpopular character that you actually like and why more people should like them

unpopular as in is just generally ignored i gotta say dwicky dude he was so fucking funny. he really played into a mentally ill homosexual childs delusions that result in the bullying of what he thinks is a chronically ill child and then offered no apology when he was proved wrong and fucked off with rando aliens.

unpopular as in actively disliked gotta say keef. something about him. i think he is so weird and he is some kind of unknowable evil. people like to interpret skoodge as zims devoted sidekick but i think it would be keef and i am convinced he knows zim is an alien but is actually just so fucked in the head he just doesnt say anything. it would be funny to me if keefs the only one who believes dib but just simply doesnt care and actively tries to help zim do horrible shit.

16. you can't understand why so many people like this thing (characterization, trope, headcanon, etc)

the way that people characterize dib to be the more emotional one of the two, the more willing to confess his feelings, the first to confess etc etc is so wrong to me. it would be zim. all of those would be zim. zim has an excuse that he is an actual outlier and barely has the vocabulary to discern whats wrong with him. dib has no excuse he is just so fucked up and doesnt want to get better. also canon shows repeatedly its dibs approval that he chases (unknowingly) and he is the first to accept help from dib or partner with him. dib fights is so damn hard. no way is dib ever going to admit he likes zim let alone even process that thought hes just gonna shove it all down.

18. it's absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on...

answered already heehee but another one is dadnar. but everyone knows how much i love it.

21. part of canon you think is overhyped

dark harvest. it is really not that scary im sorry...i was one of the children that got scared shitless by it but personally i think bolognius maximus was way scarier and instilled a deep rooted fear of losing my humanity (and also my limbs) at a young age.

25. common fandom complaint that you're sick of hearing

jhonen is not homophobic like im not too crazy about him but like i do not appreciate the bullshit that hes homophobic bc he doesnt like zadr. in no way shape or form has he acted sus to my knowledge and thats a dumb reason to call him homophobic he doesnt have to like it idfk

[sherryzade]

if i could pitch in my two cents as someone who's not able to vote but who's from the global south (syria gang gang 🇸🇾) and so tragically has a stake in american politics:

local elections are absolutely the place where your voice will matter most and have the greatest ripple effect, but on the matter of large elections like the presidential one, there ARE good options and i think there 100% is merit in voting third party, even if the benefits of that won't come quickly.

gonna super quick get on my soapbox and let ppl know that claudia de la cruz and karina garcia from the party of socialism and liberation are running for president and VP, and they rock, and they're going so hard on standing up for palestinians right now. they're making a HUGE impact on the political left (not just milk toast liberals, but genuine "fuck the capitalist system" leftists).

and like here's the thing... i actually don't think they'd win in 2024. the system is just horrifically rigged, and i think that splitting the progressive vote between democrat and third party would definitely result in a republican victory. the simple fact is that center-left progressives are entirely divorced from leftists, but center-right conservatives are willing to ally with the alt-right trumpers. i'm not gonna sit here and lie and pretend that it'll all be hunky-dory in 2024. in fact, the reason i've been so on the fence about this matter for so long is because it took me a long time to understand why some leftists are advocating for a strategy like splitting the vote which would so massively benefit republicans.

the person that really made things click for me was imani barbarin (crutches & spice on tiktok), when she pointed out a very consistent pattern within the democratic party: they don't fucking do shit without insane pressure. like real, actual, "i'm gonna lose my job" pressure. biden didn't even consider a 4 day humanitarian pause until his polling numbers plummeted lower than ever before. but he did, eventually, give in a little. that's very much the democrat's playbook, and you can see it time and time again.

yes, calling and emailing your reps can have an impact, but they know you don't think you have any other options. they know they have you trapped between a rock and a hard place, and they know the intensity of the partisanship in this country will force you into complacency. they're banking on it. the point is to make it clear that you're willing to let them lose their careers and income if they keep doing this. and yes, that's probably going to mean letting them lose and letting republicans win.

i'm not so idealistic that i think a socialist woc is gonna be the next president, but here's what i do think will happen: record high numbers of people will vote third party, and the democratic party will face massive losses including the presidential seat. you gotta strike fear into them, because no amount of appealing to their morals will ever be enough to bring change.

"but what about trump/project 2025!!" biden never promised you he'll stop that in any way shape or form. the sad and very radicalizing reality is that all of those things would happen anyway even under a democrat president. cop city is being built now. children are being deported now. people are starving now. war is happening now. the IRS is being defunded now. the electoral college exists now. abortion rights are being overturned now. climate change is happening now. education is collapsing now (and it has been for decades).

i'm not saying you should give republicans any grace and im not saying republicans are our saviors or anything. sometimes the most strategic thing is to let the enemy take the W. if people en mass just refuse to vote democrat, it'll actually be a wake up call for the ghouls in congress that they can't keep doing this shit. you gotta make em hurt, man. and then maybe after they realize the game is up and they're forever screwed, y'all can actually have a president like claudia de la cruz.

EDIT: for the people refusing to vote democrat or republican, i do still encourage you to vote 3rd party even if you know it won't really count. it still sends a message. you aren't some shmuck who doesn't vote or care about politics, you're very intentionally sending a message of "you all fucking suck." and sending that message with a single vote will mean more than a thousand emails or calls saying the same thing but then still voting blue.

I don’t want to misunderstand and make things worse for people. When you (and others) say don’t vote, do you mean don’t vote for biden or don’t vote at all?

Hey thanks for sending this in. No worries I understand the confusion.

I said in the tags in the previous post that I think people should vote for the reps in that list because they can be bullied into doing things based on the traditional means of opinion sharing (calling, writing letters, etc) and plus it's a nice little "we meant it when we said we would not be voting for you when we called" to the other dems. Basicially, using your vote strategically as a threat and sending a message instead of just blindly voting blue because red is "worse" and not because you actually like any of Democrats policies.

When I personally say I'm not going to vote, I am still voting in local elections and school boards and things like that. I definitely think you should always vote on the school board, especially, if nothing else. But I don't think I will be voting for major politicians like presidency — at least next election. I don't live in any of the districts of the ceasefire reps either.

Not voting and seeing people not voting would make people change their strategies. They know they can't rely on votes naturally anymore — they actually have to earn them based on material change. That's my personal intention, at least, with not voting. That and... like hell am I going to vote for the party and people that called for the blood of Palestinians. I do genuinely think they're bad people that no one should ever support under any circumstances, and I'll stick by that.

People mention voting for third party and I've recieved asks about it but.... I'm not sure. I think being president of the most powerful country in the world changes you fundamentally. We (palestinians) were hopeful for Obama when he went into office, and he did nothing, largely abandoning us, and he was taught by Edward Said himself. He was friends with Khalidi. He knew what was happening and still he made the decisions that he did.

Now I don't think you should just blindly follow whatever anyone says on the matter. I'm only giving you my opinion on this based on personal experience and past circumstances. You should genuinely, honestly, think about how your vote impacts others, especially around the world. Voting "blue" just because it might be easier for you here, then largely ignoring the entire world that's affected by the US, is, in my opinion, a pretty selfish decision. Besides, as someone who is disabled, Biden has already abandoned a large swath of people and basically left them to die with how he's dealt with covid. The migrant concentration camps are still there. He can't do anything about the Supreme Court and their messed up decisions. He won't do anything meaningful to protect any type of person in the states either, so what are we voting for exactly?

Voting is not a chore you have to do to keep your rights. Voting is a participation in your political system depending on the circumstances surrounding the things you care about. When that political system largely ignores you, I don't see a purpose in participating and showing support — because that's what Voting is, support — to people you fundamentally disagree with and those that don't really care about you.

[that-one-weeb-buts-its-the-main]

Dating Pietro Maximoff

Reader: female

Type:headcannons + short scenarios

Notes: Im gonna start writing for more marvel characters

Warnings: none

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You met him on a mission,

A mission where he tried to take out your partner aka Clint

"You didn't see that comin-"

And now he's being choked out by some buff chick suddenly.

Note to self: stop being cocky

He's thrown against a tree and groaning

So you both didnt meet on sweet terms at first...

He's impressed by you, and he's even more impressed that he can't find you after you basically manhandled him.

Do you have superspeed? No. No nothing like that

You're just that fricken good.

But when you're face to face with god its on

How you keep up with his superspeed with forever be a mystery to him.

The urge to just. MHM smash your face in but also kiss you is strong for him.

So imagine how flirty he tried to be when he sees you at Stark Industries

Not to mention you give Tony a hard time and he loves it

Remember he falls down that glass floor? Yeah well, he got cut.

So you're the one to fix him up, you know being the field medic as stuff.

"Had anyone ever told you how pretty you are, you know? up close"

"My dad'll kill you if he hears you saying that."

"I'll take that risk."

Well shit he hooked you with that one sentence

Saving each other on the battlefield for real.

back to back, fighting

Pietro getting injured badly and you carrying him on your back to safety

"I am gonna die doc- Shit-"

"No, but bullets out of your stomach now."

Luckily you got him back safe and sound.

And everyone's alive, yay

"Let me take you on a date for keepin' me alive."

You could only laugh, sewing up the rest of the cuts on the Quinjet.

You took him up on that offer after he heals.

He cooked you dinner, some soup from Sokovia

"You like it?"

"Yeah. It's good soup."

You thought it was a pretty fun date; even if it was just you two eating soup on top of Stark building.

You both just started talking about whatever, what you guys like; hobbies and such, and family.

He asked about your dad, and you only shook your head, "My dad, you know it's complicated...I don't see him as much as I like to."

Pietro only nodded, "Family is never easy."

It was a good date, probably the best one you'd ever had, simple and sweet.

You told him you had to go, but you kept sitting there, you both smiling at one another.

"I'm gonna kiss you now" you smile

its the best kiss ever

Dating is great with you guys, you're for sure everyone teases you.

Especially Tony

You'd guys went everywhere together: he was excited to go see things in new york with you

He loves pizza, especially in hole-in-the-wall places.

He likes hole-in-the-wall places in general, which seem cozier and more romantic.

And if you're guys on seperate missions you better be sure it feels lonely all the sudden.

Steve's kinda stepped into the dad roll for you: he's always sweet and ask how you're doing and asking how you and Pietro are doing.

He even had a father daughter possible son in law dinner with you and pietro,

You both takes alot of naps together.

You guys sleep together in general,

Yes you're the big spoon, he likes when you rub your fingers through his hair

Long kisses after missions where you havent seen him for so long are a must

You love his accent, especially after not hearing it for so long.

"You okay?" Y/n asked him, holding his face,

"Im fine. I'm okay." Pietro nodded, he holding her her wrist comforting, theres a cut across his temple and a forming bruise on his cheek, another cut across his nose.

Y/n hugs him, she was so worried, he can only hug back, kissing her head in response.

You'll try and stay in bed with him the whole day he's recovering.

Getting him anything he needs, changing any bandages.

When you're injured he has a hard time sleeping, he'd hate to lose you in any way shape, or form.

When you're both injured you just knock out together.

Is Stark having a fancy party?

You're matching, you have to, no comment: either you guys have matching schemes, or you have matching ties, maybe just matching rings

He can get jealous, especially of Guys, especially the ones who look at you for a long ass time and then come over and you entertain them

You only ever do it to be nice at first, you know: "Hi how are you" type of stuff

Pietro no matter what comes up behind you kiss your shoulder he'll ask you if everything alright

The guy usually backs off as Pietro introduces himself as an Avenger

If they don't- well, Pietro usually rushes and suddenly there's a fresh drink in your hand and a bowl of candy at the speed of light, "My love."

Now they're really running. Hah...running

At parties he loves dancing with you, he'll take it slow just for you

As said: he may run fast, but loves slow dancing with you like an old married couple.

It's not even the waltz or ballroom, or any of those slow dances: it's just rocking back and forth, going in a circle

He loves kissing you when you slow dance, he's really just so in love with you

and he looks at you that way in small moments, you just being you, makes him happy seeing you smile.

[ot3]

hey, any tips for staying in love with a series youre making? youve been working on quantum merit for 2 years now i think? any time i get an idea i just have it in the back of my mind that in a couple weeks im going to lose interest, let alone actually go through and start working on it. finishing soemthing is a distant dream. your art is amazing and a huge inspiration for me (is creativity infectious? bc thats how i feel whenever i read qm) so i was hoping maybe you had some insight. thanks <3

over two and a half years at this point actually! crazy! lacking the ability to follow through is a problem i've long had in life. i started drawing QM to try and curtail this. the trick isn't actually to stay in love with a series you're making, the trick is to learn to make things when you don't necessarily love it.

for me, the entire point of doing something operating on this level of self indulgence and experimental technique was to enable myself to churn stuff out even when i think everything i am doing is absolute shit, which is extremely extremely frequently. for long-haul projects you have to be willing and able to work on them even when you think all of your ideas are bad and all of your work is bad and not only is this the worst thing you have ever made, it is the worst thing anyone has ever made. the way i try and get through working on stuff when this is how i feel is that i remind myself i am not special in any way shape or form. everyone else in human history has had to make a lot of bad stuff before they get the privilege of making good stuff. this is allowed to be mine.

another thing that really helps is making sure that the process can be enjoyable even without good results. sometimes even when i hate everything i'm doing in terms of Substance, the act of just getting to draw something feels satisfying enough that i can make myself do it. this goes for all art, i think, not just long projects. if the Process is something you force yourself to sit through waiting for the end reward of a finished product, you're probably never going to be a functional artist. if you don't love Making art and you only love Finishing art you'll quickly find you don't make or finish much of anything.

additionally, i think an important part with long hauls like this is to never, ever look at the finish line. if i keep drawing the amount of stuff i have planned at the rate i have been drawing it, i will be at this for several more years minimum. thats an entirely overwhelming and terrifying thing to think about, and dwelling on it makes me freeze up and want to quit while i'm ahead. so i try not to ever think about actually finishing it. i have no idea if ill finish it i dont even have the slightest fucking clue what my life would even look like in the five years this could take to finish because it already looks nothing like it looked like three years ago. so instead focus on progress. if you think about finishing something you'll never do anything, if you think about just making a little bit of progress you can look back and suddenly you have over 100 full color pages. one foot in front of the other

i would also feel completely insincere if i did not mention how much all of the kind words people have had for my comic have helped me in finding the motivation to continue! seriously, it means so much to me that people like it. external motivation is not the be-all end-all of anything, but i suggest finding at least one friend who is willing to be your hype man and make them talk you out of being insane when you hate everything youre working on. when i reach the point where i literally like can't even tell what the pages im working on look like anymore i send them to my friends and make them all tell me that these are very normal looking drawings.

best of luck with your future endeavors anon i hope any of this is helpful! its an honor to be considered inspiring in any way

[narcosmx]

ramon arellano felix having a breeding kink would include (nsfw) ...

a/n: aha hahahahha hahaha this is um... what i would imagine having a breeding kink woud be like since i certainly 100% don't have....one or anything

okay so i guess i'll explain what a breeding kink is in case you don't know

it's the sexual attraction to like insemminating or being inseminated ( yah know like creampies) so like there's a thrill in the risk of impregnating or being impregnated

frequently related to a dom/sub relationship as there is a lot of power exchange that goes into it

NOT THAT I WOULD KNOW IN ANY WAY SHAPE OR FORM

anyways i can def def def see ramon having a breeding kink lets explore some reasons why

as i mentioned the power exchange portion like ramon is a jealous hoe and is all about claiming another person as theirs and really in his mind there is no better way to claim you than fucking pumping you full of his cum :) :) :)

the ultimate like claim on you and your body is fucking a baby into you aha aha

to have you carrying half of him, to breed you over and over again..

i can see this evolving out of a like dom/sub relationship because if anything else fucking mon gives me kinky as fuck vibes

i have stated this already but yeah he´s going to be the kinky one always trying shit out, 100% enjoys anal and face riding B TW

anyways

playful but stern dom vibes...lhighkey daddy vibes

like he´s a nice in between entertains you being a brat and giving in to you but with the pure shift of his voice he will have you like whimpering an apology

i see this also being a part of an actual relationship; while my bby seems to very much be a fuck boy i can see him deep down wanting someone he can rely on

someone to take care of him in the same way that he would take care of them... and kinda keeps all the kink shit for a serious relationship

so you better fucking believe that ramon doesn't even know what the fuck a condom is once he gets serious with you and comfy enough to like let his kink take over

like the first night you agree to it, holy fuck that is the hardest he's ever cum and bitch va estar mal acostumbrado

once he feels how your walls tighten around him when he fills you with cum, the way that you roll your eyes and do that little gasps when he's whispering in your ear he's going to pump you full of his kids, feels how your legs wrap around him when he tries to pull out when he's done, watching his seed trickle down your thigh....

he's a fucking goner he's convinced himself he physically cannot cum anywhere but inside you

i'm just imagining you on your knees, gagging on him and all of a sudden he tenses up and is like gently pulling you off of him

and you're looking up at him with watery eyes and pouty pouts like "did i do something wrong?"

and he's like "no, princesa, no. but you wouldn't want to waste daddy's cum would you? even if it is on your pretty little face. now go hop on the bed and spread nice and wide for daddy, hm? lets see how wet you got from sucking daddy's cock"

im cackling at the idea that ramon read in some like trashy magazine that doggy style is the position most likely to get someone pregnant

guess what position you're doing straight for the next like month and a half

this bitch is coming up behind you and bending you over whatever is closest to fuck you senseless.

wrapping his hands in your hair and pulling your head up so he can lean over to give you a kiss on the cheek and tell you how pretty you look for him

"mi princesa hermosa, and you're only going to look prettier with daddy's baby growing in your belly, isn't that right, preciosa?"

idk why im imagining this but every time before he's inside of you he always eats you out first, his little reward for you before you take all of his cum like a champ

holding your waist down as he fucking devours you this bitch does it for his own goddamn pleasure at this point

pleasure of seeing you lose your goddamn mind and

you cum on his tongue and he's all proud of himself and you're shaking having just like seen into another dimmension and he's like "now my babygirl and nice and ready for daddy's cock, hm?

can you say overstimulation

him pulling you away for quickie when you're out to eat :) :) :) or with friends or fam or stuff :) :)

and you walking around full of his cum smiling at everyone like you didn't just watch yourself get railed in the bathroom as he's pulling your hair to have you look up at the mirrior

[youn9racha]

Tomorrow Never Came

pairing: husband/(?)!changbin x researcher astronaut!reader (afab)

genre: sci-fi au, angst, fluff, comfort (?)

synopsis: you were unhappy that you were forced to leave behind your loving family in order to embark on an unethical mission. while you may be leaving, you and changbin are sure that you two will not be forgotten, no matter how far you are.

warning: sad departure, child mention (y/n and bin has a kid), reference of love making/sex but nothing too detailed, chan is also an astronaut but he’s mainly a background character, y/n’s referred to as “mrs. seo” but pronouns are not mentioned, arguments, just emotional sad shit really.

words: 2.0k

a/n: so this is new, never made a strictly angst fic that has no smut, especially since i write nsfw stuff. although there is no porn (at least at this part), i still wouldn’t want minors to interact with me, so please if you’re under 18, don’t interact. anyhow, i might turn this into a mini series, but still im seeing how this story goes, so if it’s possible, i’ll post a part two if i can. but either way, i hope y’all enjoy this 👹🙏 grab the tissues !!!

extra notes: c/n means the son's name.

This is no way representative of the way Stray Kids act. They’re nothing but references of character, and in no shape or form is this how they act. And I am in no way romanticizing or glamorizing any toxic behavior exhibited, they’re just stories that is meant to be read. Readers discretion is advised.

Here we are, to our destination.

You have no idea what time it was or what day it is, losing the concept of time the longer this trip took from one planet to another. You thought you were a mere astronomy researcher working at the famous big space company, an observer, expected to work on your computer and look up the telescope to see the outside life as you would simply put it. You didn’t expect to take part in this crazy space mission; leaving Earth to find a planet with civilization for humans to colonize. You knew that the time being on this Earth is numbered, especially with how neglectful humans have been, but you didn’t expect yourself to be leaving Earth, leaving all your friends and family at the last minute. You weren’t as experienced or been around as your peers, making you one of the youngest in this mission, along with one other member who was your co-worker named Christopher Bang. They told you the reason you were going is that you were the best fit at keeping records and organized when it comes to gathering information.

It was all overwhelming to you. Your tears gathered up as you had no choice but to follow through with the request as it is your last resort. The dreadful actions of breaking the news to your loved ones left you even worse, with your husband’s, Changbin’s, reaction being the worse.

“What do you mean you’re leaving?! You’re leaving me and our son behind here?!” Hearing the usually soft-spoken man yelling left your heart shattering each time he speaks, “Why didn’t you speak up, huh?! Why didn’t you tell them ‘hey, by the way, I have a husband and a five-year-old kid, and I can’t leave them behind,’ was that fucking hard, (y/n)?!”

“I didn’t have a choice, Changbin!” You retorted back, tears threatening to spill, “you think I wanna leave?! If I had the choice, I would’ve chosen to stay here with you guys, but my hands are tied!”

Changbin could only scoff, looking away from you so you wouldn’t see his teary-eyed. Despite showcasing his anger, he’s more upset than angry, upset that his fear is coming true; you are leaving for a mission. He knew it was going to happen at some point, especially seeing how hard-working you were, but he didn’t expect it to happen so soon, so he didn’t mentally prepare for this to happen.

“When will you be going?” Changbin’s voice cracked as he gulped the lump in his throat, still not looking at you. You sighed as you looked down, dreading to speak.

“Next week…”

Changbin licked his quivering lips as he fights to not sob in front of you, but his sniffling and grimacing came in stronger as he shakes his head and got down on his knees to hold your head so your tear-filled eyes would contact his.

“Please, don’t leave, I don’t want you to go,” Changbin pleaded as he gave in and sobbed with his head leaning into yours. You followed along by wrapping your arms around his shoulders and you two solemnly sobbed into each other’s arms, not wanting to leave each other and hoping the day you leave doesn’t come by. You prefer to wither into his arms as the planet slowly dies than leave your family behind for a mission that you find unethical. You wanted to grow old with Changbin as you see your son go through life milestones like graduating, having a significant other, getting married, etc. You didn’t want to come back with Changbin and your son getting older, and you remain the same.

 So, you two promised that you would communicate whenever possible and not forget about each other no matter how long you’ll take. The ring that binds and signifies your relationship should never be removed no matter what. You’ve told your son that you’ll be gone for a bit, leaving out the details on why or when will you coming back, but you promised him that you’ll come back.

Changbin took the week off and made your little one skip a week of school, just for the three of you to get together and bond before you leave. You three spent time together truly like the world’s ending tomorrow, laughing and playing with no worries, smiles painted on the three of you, relishing the beautiful moment you are having. You truly wished to stay longer, especially after seeing your husband and son playing around the garden, playing with a water gun, and squirting water at each other. While you didn’t want to leave, you were at least glad that Changbin was a good father and your little bundle of joy is going to be in good hands.

It was the night before your departure, and after putting your son to sleep, you and Changbin rolled up into bed, holding each other in your arms, just enjoying the closeness you two are having especially since it’ll take a while until you two would have this moment again.

Changbin squeezed as he kissed the top of your head, inhaling the scent of your hair, “I’ll miss this… I’ll miss being so close to you.”

You lifted your head, as you give your husband a sad smile, “believe me, Bin, I’ll miss this as well.”

You got up and kissed Changbin’s lips which were filled with adoration and passion. Changbin held your waist as he licked your lips to open yours so he could taste your mouth. He groaned as he sense a salty taste, opening his eyes slightly to see your tears spilling out of your closed eyes. He pulled away, making you shake your head, going on with a plea.

“Please, Changbin, don’t forget about me,”

“Sweetheart, I won’t.”

“Promise you that you’ll love me no matter what, and make sure you’ll remind (c/n) that I love him?”

Changbin smiled, “Of course, (y/n), you matter to me more than what you could imagine.”

That’s all you wanted to hear before you began going on his lips and taking in all the love you had for each other. Changbin filled you over, making you lay your head and him on top of you. He pulled away from you so he could take off his shirt, making you smile up to him in excitement, before he got closer to you.

“I’ll love you so hard, I’ll make sure you’ll never forget about me…”

“(Y/n)! (Y/n)!”

Your head shook as you brought yourself back to your current state, realizing that Changbin wasn’t actually next to you, that was a mere past unfortunately to you. You looked at the source and you saw Chris lightly nudging your arm, and then pointing ahead signaling you to look at what he’s seeing. You looked ahead at the head captain, who turned to you with a half-smile, “we’re almost there, buckle up and get your notepads ready!” he announced, before turning back at the control panel. You see ahead a blue and green ball that is awfully like Earth, your eyes marveled at the sight, muttering a “woah,” to yourself.

“We have reached our destinations, boys, it’s time for landing.”

As the captain spoke through the radio, he pressed down a bunch of buttons that allowed the rocket to land. The closer the shuttle got into the atmosphere, the more rattling the ship created. As you felt yourself shaking in place thanks to the ship, you breathed heavily as you held onto the arms of the chair, and panic sinks in even further into your system. The worst way to be stranded���or worse, die—is to be on an unknown planet, where help is nowhere near. You began praying, praying at whoever can answer it, hoping not only you can land safely, but hoping that Changbin and your son are okay, whether you can see them again or not, you just hope they’d be okay back home.

The last time you saw them was before take off, the space station allowed the families of the crew to come in and say their farewells. When you saw your husband and child one last time, you couldn’t help yourself and started crying in their arms, never wanting to let go of them, hoping just at this last minute the mission would get canceled and you get back with your family.

But that wasn’t gonna happen and you knew it.

When you pulled away, tears spilled from your husband’s eyes once again, his hand held onto yours, not wanting to let go of it. You sadly smiled at him as you kissed him a sweet kiss one last time before pulling away, “I love you, Changbin.”

Changbin just looked at you with quivered lips while you kneeled to your son, who was smiling at you. His smile was like Changbin’s, especially with how it brightened up just like his dad except with missing front teeth. “I’ll miss you, darling…”

He wrapped his little arms around your shoulders, placing his chubby cheek on your shoulder blade, “I’ll miss you, mommy.”

Your eyes open suddenly, gasping for air, and getting up from your slumber. You blinked and you see yourself in an unfamiliar setting, the last thing you remembered before blacking out was you were in the space shuttle with Christopher sitting next to you. Instead, you were in a brightly square room, almost like a cell, but instead of bars, you see a bright orange hallway through the glass wall in front of you. You looked around the room and, for a cell, it was eerily comfortable, basic accommodation was met with water, a closet, a coffee table, a couch, and a tv. It felt like a hotel rather than confinement, but it still left you uneasy as you didn’t know where you or your crewmates were.

You hurriedly got up, and as soon as you got up, you saw that you were out of your space suit and instead in the comfortable clothing you brought along, almost as if someone dressed it for you. You rummaged through the room to find your stuff, but nothing stuck out to you, neither were your things found. You then went up to the glass and began banging on it and calling out for whoever can help you.

“Hello! Anyone there?! Christopher?! Captain?! Anyone?!”  

Nothing.

You assume the glass was soundproof, so you slammed your head in it as you sighed in disappointment before turning and sliding down against it. You shook your head as regret begin coursing through your whole body, and slapped yourself in the head.

“God! (y/n), you’re so dumb, you couldn’t have fought harder? Changbin’s right, you should’ve fought harder, otherwise, you wouldn’t be in this fucking mess!” You angrily muttered to yourself. You began voicing out your frustration as you walked around your room before laying back in your bed and covering your face as you sigh through your hand.

“Can this nightmare just end?” Your voice slightly shakes, sadness and frustration expelled out of your mouth with your tone. While venting to yourself with your hand covered, you didn’t notice that the glass door opened, and in came someone.

“Mrs. Seo?”

You froze in place, still, your hand covering your face, as you heard a very familiar voice, it was masculine and slightly deep and raspy. You uncovered your face as you got up with a shocked expression as you looked at the man standing in front of you.

“I see you have awakened, Mrs. Seo,” The man standing in front of you smiled at you hospitably. Your head couldn’t wrap itself, even when the man talked to you, you can’t wrap your head that it’s the man you’ve only had in your head. The black, curly-haired, who is muscular in build, tiger-eyed with a sharp chin, it has to be him, and you were convinced the closer you got to the man standing. Though he maintained a confused expression, he found himself static as you went up to him and held his face, especially seeing your broken facial expression with eyes telling saddening stories.

“Changbin? Is that you?”

[justagirlsearchingforamuse]

Could you write a reunion fic as a sequel to the Heisenberg 'alone time' that you wrote? While smut would be wonderful, I'd just be grateful for apologetic Karl forced to be humble for once in his life.

(Also im DYING to know what he did, did OC/Reader discover his Soldats or about Rose? Im so curious and itching for more)

Your writing is awesome and I hope to get to read more Heisenberg goodness from you!

A/N: Thanks so much and I'm glad you guys are enjoying what I'm writing, sorry if it took so long and I'll be happy to answer more asks (including angst and fluff) for RE8. Sorry if this is so damn long but hope you guys enjoy it nonetheless. Also decided to make it gender neutral as I didn't want anyone to be left out.

Warnings: NSFW, Smut, The reader riding Karl, The reader not afraid to talk back to Karl, Stitching, Cursing/Inappropriate Language, Oral, Kissing, Arguing, power bottom' Karl, fluffy smut, unprotected sex, dirty talk, Fluff, and nearly 8000 words.

It's been far too long since you have seen that man and you hoped not to see him for as long as you both may live, for a time you thought it was just 2 people with different paths that force them apart but in a way you couldn't be more wrong. You understood and still understand his need to get rid of his troubling and frankly corrupt family, you both shared a dream to run away from the Village and to live somewhere with beautiful sights. To have some form of happiness even if it doesn't last, sure normal life may seem boring but it's all that you both wanted, happiness away from reminders of Miranda and the rest of his seemingly fucked up family. But what it took to for him to get it, his plan that he seemingly thought was so brilliant only made you boil with rage and painful reminders of your past is brought from the dark corners of your memories and into the light of your mind. Children. They're so innocent, good, and pure ... they bring out everything in people, children are something that you hold near and dear to your heart. Children are everything that the world isn't, at least until they're forced to grow up and deal with the cruelty of the world. This wasn't the first time that you had disagreed or fought with Karl in your mind, but what really caused you to boil over was his plans.

A heavy huff slips from your lips as your heavy steps full of anger echoed throughout the factory, your hands are balled into tight fists and your fingers trembled along with your body, you just couldn't fucking take it. You weren't going to stand by and turn a blind eye to sacrificing an innocent child for your happiness, you weren't going to and Karl as usual tried to convince you into it. Make it seem like it'll be worth it in the end. He's stomping after you, following after you like a dog and you can hear him desperately trying to get you to stay, you keep your eyes forward and keep making your way towards the exit. Just as the door is in sight, he reaches out to grab your wrist causing you to gasp before trying to pull out of his grasp, he pulls you firmly towards him and makes you meet his eyes. His green eyes are clouded with ... desperation, they're soft and vulnerable but it didn't phase you. Not one bit. "Come on, (Y/N) ... you know that I'd do anything for you. ... You know I love you ... that's why I have to do this, kitten. You have to fucking understand ...!" He pleads with you, you turn away from his face, that bitter taste still remains on your tongue and his words fall deaf to your ears. "You don't understand! You don't understand at all! You're in your own fucking bubble ...! I can't do this! I can't live with the fact that the man I'm in love with is willing to sacrifice an innocent child for a chance at happiness." You growl at him, your words are breathless and harsh and it stings like poison to his soul, his expression begins to slowly fade into resentment. A look you had never seen before, especially towards you. "Listen to me! ... The fruits of our labor shall come ... but it all comes with a little sacrifice." He barks, his grip on your wrist slightly tightening with his anger rising as he tries to plead with you, get you to understand but you could care less. "Then I don't want to share that kind of happiness or freedom with you at all ...!" You bark back, your words are dripping in poison and there isn't much care behind them, a huff leaves your nostrils and you once again try to get out of his painfully tight grasp but he wants you to hear him. Fuck. "I thought ... fuck ... I thought you fucking loved me. All those nights, all those late-night talks, the passionate love we made ... I guess it meant fuck-all to you, huh? I guess you never gave a fuck about me ... I wanted you to ... I wanted you to understand." Karl seethes, his words are in a low growl and his green eyes are clouded with bubbling rage and fury. Fuck.

"I did love you, Karl. I still do but you have to leave or do something, I don't fuckin' know but there should be a limit to the price you're willing to pay for a chance at freedom. ... I'm not willing to. This ... this brings back too many painful memories, I would never let myself live if I let her die." You almost sob, your anger that was once boiling and alive was now being put out by the melancholy that rested deep within your soul. That baby reminds you so much of ... your history. You never told him about your past and the trauma you somewhat suffer from it that makes you long and ache for freedom. But now wasn't the time. At all. "I can't do that ...! You know I can't ...! You can't leave me, (Y/N) ...!" He shouts at you, desperately clinging to his relationship that is burning, crumbling right in front of his very eyes, he's trying so hard to save it but the thought quickly floods in what if he can't save what you have? His jaw clenches and his throat begins to tighten, breaths become hard to even get out and you can hear his low growl of rage and sorrow echo through your ears. Your throat had tightened the moment he reached out for your hand and now the tears were swelling in your eyes, leaving them uncontrollably. "I love you, Karl. But this is the end of us. The end of our story together." You managed to choke out as his expression softens yet he's stiff, a frown is plastered on his lips, and doesn't seem like it's leaving anytime soon. Regrets plague his mind, "I regret ever opening up to you. Fuck, I never should've let you into my life especially if you were gonna fuck me over and leave me alone." He thinks to himself and immediately lets go of your wrist, he forces on a blank expression and forces his tears to be hidden away, he pushes away his heartache and goes back to the only way he knows how to not fall apart, to not lose himself and to become weak.

"I never wanna see your fuckin' face again. Leave. Don't even think of coming back. You fuckin' ... you fuckin' hurt me ..." He grunts and growls at you, even lightly pushing you towards the door before turning his back on you as he crosses his arms. Fuck. "I'm sorry for the pain I've caused." You manage to say in a whisper, wiping away your tears and sniffling to yourself before leaving out that door and never looking back, it was hard leaving him behind to wallow and experience his pain alone that you caused. But you stand by your choice that you couldn't stay if he had to use Rose for his plans. Still, he plagued your dreams, still had nightmares about that man, about losing him in so many graphic ways. You tried to live your life, going to work and just trying to find a way to live without seeing Karl ever again at least you thought. You never forgot him. It was around 2 in the morning and you managed to sleep for just a few minutes until your phone rang obnoxiously loud, ringing and vibrating against your nightstand. You sat up, rubbing your eyes, and an annoyed groan left your lips before you picked up your phone, though you had lost his number you knew it was in that village and it meant that he was the only one calling you. You almost want to toss your phone across the room, a familiar bitter taste begins to coat your tongue and you slowly take in a breath staring at the phone in your hand. "God fucking damn it." You curse bitterly, regretfully pressing the answer button on your phone, scratching at your head you answer with a bitter and low "hello" that is answered with heavy ragged breaths. Coughing soon follows after and echoes through the phone. "What the he-" You begin to ask before you're interrupted by his sudden cursing and rage-filled words. "Stupid fucking Ethan Winters ... the bastard ... couldn't even ... finish the job ..." He coughs into the phone, blood pools in his gut, fuck he was ruining one of his favorite shirts and an empty swallowing pain aches through his stomach. But he barely cared.

"The fuck are you rambling about, Karl ...?" You ask harshly, standing up on your feet as you press the phone to your ear, waiting for an explanation. "Oh, fuck off! You wouldn't understand ...! Or care!" He howls back before you can hear him cough once again before a wince soon slips from his parted lips, an agitated expression twists onto your face. "You must've thought I would care if you thought to fuckin' call me. Tell me what's up or I swear I'll fucking hang up." You bark at him, clenching your fists tightly as heavy ragged breaths left your body in the presence of your anger. " ... If you do give a damn ... then your ex is bleeding the fuck out in his factory ... with no knowledge of medicine and shit." He coughs out, he presses his hand firmly onto his large wound, fuck was he in bad shape and Ethan Winters had fucked him up but like a coward left him alive. "I might be there. Keep pressure on the wound and try not to die, dickhead." You huff in a ragged breath before hanging up quickly, in a way you thought it was karma for him wanting to use a baby and possibly murder a baby to get rid of his toxic and frankly not real family.

You sit back down onto your bed with a heavy sigh leaving your lips and a question on your mind. Was it gonna be worth it? He could be trying to trick you, you thought to yourself and really questioned if you should drive there and help him supposedly. As much as you wanted to be bitter, to hold onto that resentment but your heart and soul ached to see that filthy man, it called out to him desperately. Your heart sang to see him, to hear him despite your mind's warnings and reasonable viewing of the situation. Like a dumbass, you listened to your heart and began to get dressed, you threw on some old coat and a pair of washed-up skinny jeans, you grabbed a med-kit and some stitches and quickly rush to drive to the hidden and eerie village. With your foot pressed hard on the gas pedal, you kept wishing and praying that he'd be fine, that the waste of gas and the risk of being pulled over by cops worth it. When you finally make it to the factory, it's grim and dark and seemingly stopped working, the smoke that came from the factory is gone, the noise and the racket that his factory produced every second. You quickly get out of your car, medkit, and tools in your arms as you enter, you can hear his heavy strained breaths echoing through the factory that is now seemingly dead. Lifeless. A series of coughs leave his lips as he sits slumped up against the side of his bed, his blood drips and oozes off his hand, covering his stomach wound as the pain just continued, it still ached and stung like salt on an exposed wound. His head is dizzy with a haze over him, fuck was his head aching like a motherfucker and everything on his body ached and cried out in pain. "Karl ...?!" He hears you shout desperately searching for the man, he could hear the distress in your voice, the panic that came in your hurried and seemingly quick steps. "I-I'm h-here ..." He weakly responds in a low whisper, blood begins to coat his tongue and the unfamiliar taste of iron rests upon his tongue. You hear his cry weakly and you quickly rush to his bedroom, heavy breaths leave your lips in your pursuit to find Karl before he bleeds out or chokes on his own blood. What an idiot ...

He's in seemingly worse shape than when you left, his lips are beginning to become tainted with his own blood, many small wounds were all over him but the most concerning was the one on his stomach. He's coughing and trying to take in oxygen, trying to taste something other than iron on his stomach and he turns to find you, standing there before him. Damn. He forces on a wide toothy grin when he meets your gaze, damn he could feel the tension and could see that dark haze in your eyes, full of disappointment and resentment. "So we f-fuckin' meet again, huh?" Karl coughs out as a short series of chuckles soon follow after, he's trying to keep what little pride he had intact. He couldn't be seen as weak after you broke him, you left him in pieces and chose to leave him because of some stupid sacrifices he had to make in pursuit of the happiness and freedom you deserved. "So we do, asshole ... let me guess, the plan that you were so persistent on working didn't fucking work ... what happened to never come back?" You growl at him, crossing your arms as bitterness seemingly runs through you, you could feel your heart thump in your chest and your hands curled into tight fists. " ... That doesn't m-matter right now. I just n-need your fucking help!" He snaps, his words strained and choked before a series of coughs soon leave his lips. You slowly take in a breath, considering whether to just hand him the medkit and fucking peace out but you know the asshole lacks medical knowledge and would die. You let a deep sigh leave your lips before you kneel beside him, putting one of his arms around your shoulders, and with a loud groan of pain, you set him down on the bed, lying him down on his back and making sure he was comfortable. "I'll only be able to take care of this and stop you from bleeding out. You'll have to be still, Karl otherwise I'll fuck up." You advise him, getting up to go wash your hands and make sure that you don't get him infected whilst you're at it, you come back into his bedroom and open the medkit and begin to get to work on the wound. Karl would've never thought or had the pride to call up his ex, the one person he told himself he'd never need again is forced to put his pride on the side and is forced to let his ex attend to his wounds. All he can do is frown deeply, turning away from you to stare out the window, and all he can think is that Ethan Winters is still out there. He's gonna kill Miranda. That was his job, that was something he spent his life working towards doing, getting rid of that bitch Miranda and stealing her precious power. He's forced out of his thoughts when you begin to rub alcohol onto the wound causing a sharp stinging sensation to shoot through him, he grits his teeth at the stinging and almost burning sensation plaguing his body. "Warn me next time, will ya?" He says before a heavy cough soon follows, you sigh deeply as you continue to rub the alcohol on his wound gently, making sure it doesn't get infected and die from an infected wound.

"Warn you? ... It's just rubbing alcohol not a lighter." You respond, rolling your eyes at the man before you as you set down the towel and begin to pull out your thread and your needle. If he thought the alcohol was painful then he is truly in for a rude awakening. "This is gonna be painful, Karl ... I'll try to be quick with it." You state, somewhat warning him of the pain to come. "Please do ... I can't wait until you fucking leave ..." Karl bitterly spat, still unable to accept the fact that he needed you, that you were right, that he wanted you back into his life because, in his mind, it's better to bottle it up. "I won't treat you if you act like an ignorant dog." You spat back, your eyes meet his for a moment as an expression of anger twists onto your face, he begins to try and speak before a wince fell from his lips at the sensation of the thread going through his skin, he slams his fist down onto the bed and hisses at the pain once more. "Says you, you literally came in here pissed. Maybe just shut up and do ... ah!" He begins to say, his words are filled with anger and irritation before another sharp sensation of pain shoots through him. "Look, my bad alright but it's not every day you want to see your ex who was willing to ..." You begin to retort back at him, giving him a mean glare before he barks back. "You have to make sacrifices for everything! ... Now Ethan is going to get his daughter, probably gonna murder Miranda when I deserved the right to kill her. To watch the bitch suffer and choke on her own fucking blood." He growls, bitterness comes to him like air and he lets out a huff through his nostrils, a bitter and sour expression twists onto his face as he thinks of the fact that Ethan nearly murdered him, he thinks to the fact Ethan is going to steal what he worked so hard to get. "Whether you kill her or he does, she'd still be dead. ... You need to just ... let go of it and be grateful he let you live ... besides can't you finally be free out of that woman's grasp?" You say, less bitterness in your voice than before as another painful wince slips from his parted lips, he sucks in a breath through his teeth and lets out a heavy ragged breath. "That's if that fool can kill her. That's why I needed Rose. I needed her power to help me kill her. I needed it." He growls, slamming his fist against the wall in frustration.

"Did you ...? If Ethan nearly killed you then you severely underestimated how powerful he is ... probably can rival Miranda's power or maybe it's ... it's because he loves his daughter so much, it drives him to keep going." You say, your once bitter expression faded into something more dreary as you are reminded of your past, you would've done anything for that child. He scoffs to himself, turning away from you as you stop stitching him up as a truly bitter and painful expression twists onto your beautiful face. You force his face towards your own and gaze deeply into his eyes, you want him to feel, to see the pain that you felt and he did feel it. "You act like it's so terrible to be human ... it's so terrible to fall victim to your emotions ... that man loves his child just like how you loved me. He would've sacrificed anything for that child, he was willing to try and kill you, he was willing to kill Lady Dimitrescu, he was willing to do it all. That's what being human is. That's what's strong, so fucking strong." You exclaim, slowly inhaling a breath into your nostrils as silence quickly fills the air between you both, you can see the realization in his eyes flicker before him and how he softens in a way. Licking your lips, you push him back and hide that urge that was a habit you had, leaning to kiss him whenever your eyes met his whenever you saw how he softened before you. You missed that so much. You didn't say anything more, you go back to stitching up his stomach wound with an unreadable expression on your face, it was a mixture of pain and frustration and Karl saw it but most of all he saw your pain. It reminded him of his own. He would do anything for you. If you wanted him he would take you back in a heartbeat and he was afraid to admit that. Afraid to admit that he was still weak to you, still weak under your human ways that he used to relish in with you and he was afraid of being open, being hurt, being vulnerable, and falling victim to you in case you left him again. In a way you were weak to him too, stubborn as well but more willing to open up to him, to be vulnerable in front of him, willing to take the bait if it meant you would get hurt again. You were almost numb. To it. The pain that he had caused you but it was still there, stinging you at whatever moment it got and you let it become what you see Karl as. Another reminder of your pain, another man willing to sacrifice whatever for a taste of freedom and revenge. But despite that you loved him.

"I apologize for acting like a bitch when I came in here. I just ... I never thought you'd call or need me ever again and I didn't think I needed you either." You say in a somewhat soft breath, you meet his eyes for a few moments before turning your attention back to his wound and he turns towards you, licking his lips before he runs his finger over his bottom lip. "Thank you." He says smartly with a prideful smile soon curling onto his lips before you roll your eyes at him, you bite your tongue to stop any laughter from coming out. "Come on, you have manners don't you Karl? You acted like a bit of a dick too. Or is it too low of Mr. Karl Heisenberg to apologize?" You tease, a natural warm smile curls onto your lips for a few moments, Karl's heart feels light once more and it pulsates in his chest at the once familiar sight he used to see all the time, he missed that smile. Chuckling, he looks down and can feel the bitter irony taste on his tongue begin to fade away slowly but surely it is. "I apologize for acting like a dick earlier. There. That make you happy?" He says, rolling his eyes to himself before you nod with a chuckle soon falling from your lips, your hair had changed, your fashion sense had as well but you were still the same with that warm smile that made him nearly have a heart attack. "Alright, I should be done in a moment ... I'll clean your wound once again and make sure it doesn't get infected ..." You say once more, your tone has returned to its initial seriousness and he sighs to himself, just when he thought you were letting the mask fall, just when he thought things might be going back to normal. "It's fine, do what you have to do ..." He responds, waving his hand in a motion to allow you to keep doing what you were doing. You continued for a few moments longer, trying to stay focused on stitching his wound up but suddenly thoughts starting appearing in your head, what if things could go back to normal? What if you can be free together now? What if you can share happiness with him? Maybe you were an optimistic fool but having hope that things might change between you two is something that you happily looked forward to.

"Alright, I'm done. You shouldn't bleed out and die and ... I'd say try not to fuck up your stitches. But I should be going if I am not of any help to you anymore, Karl ..." You say lowly, reaching out to seize your medkit before he suddenly grabs your wrist, just like the last time you saw him causing you to nearly jump at the sudden grasp on your wrist. He realizes what he's doing from your somewhat distressed expression and lets go of your wrist quickly. "I'm sorry for ... that. But ... I'll probably need more medicine or more care to make sure I don't fuck up my stitches." He rambles, allowing himself to be vulnerable for just another moment, licking his lips his eyes meet yours once again and you see that familiar desperation in his eyes. But this time, you thought what if you stayed and so you set your medkit back down and let a deep breath leave your lips, you somewhat missed the familiar sound of his factory working and working tirelessly. "I hope you aren't planning on stopping Ethan. I'm sorry but it's just fucking stupid ... let him take care of Miranda and let him have Rose then you have what you want. Freedom. Happiness." You exclaim, sitting on the opposite end of the bed beside him with legs resting on the mattress. "I ... I want to. ... Miranda has caused so much pain, so much agony to me ... she doesn't see me as her son, nor will I ever see her as a mother. She's just ... she's just a crazy bitch who decided to steal a fucking baby and hope it could be a vessel for her fucking precious little Eva." He growls bitterly, a sour expression twists onto his face as he crosses his arms, still bitter to the core and revenge is still tainting his mind, no thought of freedom or happiness crossed his mind. Just Miranda. "I know. All she cares about is finding a body for Eva ... but you could finally be happy away from that crazy ass woman. Besides ... this plan has already been a huge failure." You exclaim in a gentle sigh, licking your lips before taking in a breath and so many memories flood back to your brain whenever you stare at something. Even this bed has so many memories.

"I ... I haven't failed. Besides blame Ethan for ruining an otherwise amazing plan. So much for working together." He spat, rolling his eyes at the thought that he was possibly bested by a mere human makes his blood boil. "This plan has nearly cost you your life and cost you a chance at even getting a sliver of freedom." You explain, another sigh leaves your lips as you stare down at the mattress beneath you, silence fills the room once more because Karl's pride won't allow him to see that maybe he had failed in his plan. "You even lost me ..." You muttered lowly almost in a whisper but Karl heard it and his expression twisted from bitter to disheartened and remorseful. "Look, I get that I hurt you and I hate it. But I needed to do it ... I needed to try and get rid of her! Get some kinda control over my own fucking life! I am done with being another experiment for her to use for her wishes! I ... I just want to be free ..." He exclaims, all manner of emotion is pouring out of him and seeping through his mask of charm, taking in a slow shaky breath as his throat tightens and memories flicker of his family, his real family. His mother, her warm smile that is reminiscent of yours, her warm comfy hugs and just remembering it had tears traveling down his cheeks as he clenched his jaw firmly. Your expression softened at the sight before you, a saddened and pitiful frown curls onto your lips as you can sense his pain, he really lost his life to being Miranda's experiment, to being her slave. A soft breath leaves your lips and you rest your hand upon his shoulder, expressing comfort as he inhales another shaky breath, pain is what became of him and he tried to fix himself only to become more broken.

"Karl, listen to me ... you're allowed to be happy ... you're allowed to smile, allowed to be angry, you're allowed to be happy." You coo, your words are gentle but powerful and your eyes are sincere, warm, and delicate to his eyes. He turns to you, eyes slightly puffy and an expression of pain is twisted on his face, letting a gentle breath when he looks at you, when he gazes into your eyes for a few moments, he's reminded of happiness, he's reminded of warmth, he's reminded of love and family. He still loves you. His eyebrows furrow before he wraps his arms around you, clinging to you desperately as he buries his face into you, still pain torments him when he can and it destroys his life. It destroyed his relationship with you, it destroyed everything around him and it almost destroyed him, he would've sacrificed everything just for freedom, just to have his life be his own. He sees it now, it comes to him painfully raw and honest and he almost hates it because of how he hurt you, the one damn good thing in his shitty miserable life. "I hurt you. I fucking hurt you and you came back for me? I ... I don't fuckin' deserve you ... at all ..." He exclaims, his words muffled into the fabric of your clothes as he can feel your arms wrap around him, your hands gently massage him and the simple gesture puts him at peace and ease. "I came back because as much as you hurt me ... you don't deserve this, Karl ... despite how I left you, I still care so much about you. Hell, when it's you I listen to my heart rather than my fucking brain. With you, it's different ... with you, I could never forget you. At all." You confessed with a soft sigh leaving your lips at the end of your words, your hands move to his long untamed grey and brown locks, you gently run your fingers through his locks and you nearly chuckle at the unique texture of his hair. "I didn't either, butterfly ... I hurt you and I see how I fucking hurt you, hell I didn't care if you left me I was still going to continue to plan despite how it hurt you. I'm an asshat. I wouldn't want to remember me if I did that." He exclaims, a gentle smile curls onto his lips as he stares up at you with a familiar smile that warms your heart, it leaves it jumping in your chest and leaves your stomach with butterflies.

"It's good that you see that and I hate that hurt you too ... I know that I left feeling so bad, so bitter about this whole fucking plan ... but this plan the only good thing it brought to you was bringing me to find your nearly dead ass." You chuckle, a wide smile curls onto your lips as a peaceful and joyful expression is plastered onto your face, another chuckle leaves your lips as a warm familiar smile remains on your lips. He can't stop himself from smiling as well, savoring these moments you share of nothing but pure joy, and he can't help but cup both sides of your cheeks. His fingers gently caress your cheeks, his smile warms your heart and your soul and the familiar sensation of his hands against your cheeks made you melt before him. Silence fills the room as he admires you, your beautiful features, and everything along with it. "Out of everyone in the world, I could never hate you ..." He chuckles almost like a giggly child at a toy store, a wide smile remains plastered on his face and his soul is singing, calling out for you and his heart thrashes wildly in his ribcage. You let out a gentle breath and suddenly his lips are pressed gently against yours, your stomach is crowed and flooded with butterflies, your heart is pulsating in your chest, and everything is calling out to Karl. Moments after, he pulls away from your lips with a somewhat worried expression on his face, he questions was he moving too fast, did you not want him but his thoughts are put to stop when your lips collide passionately against his. It came to you so naturally and once the thought appeared in your head, your heart followed along with it along with your body, and here you were passionately kissing the man who you hadn't seen in over 6 months. He groans against your lips, savoring and relishing the familiar sensations that came as his eyes flutter close, he was such a fool, such a fool to not see that he was risking the only thing that mattered for a chance at even getting freedom. He was but a child ...

Groaning against his lips as you began to clutch a fistful of his hair, the kiss quickly grew deeper and more heated, heavy breaths left both your lips as you gently devoured each other's lips, greedy for the sensations it brought you both. Groaning into your mouth once more, Karl's hands slip your jacket off of you, he throws it to the floor and buries his lips into your neck, kissing and sucking lightly at the sensitive skin earning a soft gasp from your lips at the sharp sensation. "Karl ..." You say in a ragged breath, hands still entangled in his locks of hair as he continues to kiss and suck on your neck, your body begins to heat up with arousal and your body begins to ache for Karl. "Damn ... I just can't get enough of you, can I?" He chuckles, grinning devilishly at you as his eyes glance at your lips once again, he pulls you into another heated kiss that has his tongue prying your lips apart. His tongue enters your mouth, his tongue grinds against yours and your tongues begin to dance erotically together causing both of you to moan against each other's lips at the tingling sensations that spread across your tongues. Karl's arousal begins to show with the bulge that swells in his pants, he continues to kisses you, moaning and groaning at the overdue sensation of a warm body against his. Pulling away from your lips, heavy ragged breaths leave both of your lips and he can't help but notice your flushed cheeks as a breathless expression remains on your face. "Do you want this ...? Do you want me, (Y/N) ...?" He asks in a ragged breath, his hand cups one of your cheeks, as he gazes intensely into your eyes, lust, and desire, clouded those beautiful eyes of yours and it was one of his favorite expressions on your face. "I want you so much ... I want nothing but you and your naked body to be mine ..." You answer, smirking devilishly at the man before you as a low chuckle soon leaves your lips, grinning widely at you he kisses your lips once again, cherishing the smooth and delicate feeling of your lips.

"Mmh, your lips feel amazing, darling ... I missed all of this, the kisses, the touches, the way you worship me ... I missed it all so much." He purrs lustfully as a chuckle soon follows after, taking in a breath he pushes you onto your back earning a gasp from you before he gets in between your legs. He stares at the tank top you wore, it hugged your body perfectly, and hell it exposed a lot of skin, though it was basic it was enough for him. You'll always be enough for him and more. "Arms up, darling ..." He chirps, you raise your arms, and off comes your tank top and your torso was immediately met with multiple kisses and bright hickeys that decorated your skin. Wrapping your arms around his chest, he takes one of your nipples into his mouth, he lightly sucks on one as his other hand explores your torso, caressing your skin gently and with care. Your heart is thrashing, pounding in your ribcage, and heat floods through your being, arousal comes with that and it leaves you aching so terribly with a need for sweet release. Heavy ragged breaths leave your lips, licking your lips as you can only think of Karl, what he was going to do to you, what you were going to do to him. He takes your nipple out of his mouth, trailing kisses down your stomach as he gets lower and lower until he reaches your bothersome pants, letting out a growl he harshly pulls your pants down and throws them somewhere before he immediately buries his face into your crotch. His tongue moves gently, caressing all your sweet spots as the heat begins to boil up deep inside of you, you relished and savored the moist heat that caressed you in such amazing ways. Moaning against you, his hands wrap around your thighs to keep you from moving too much but he thought it was all about making you feel better, tonight was all about what you wanted, whatever you wanted you will have it. "Oh, Karl ...! Hah ... shit ... shit ..." You moan shamelessly, your hands clutch and grasp at his long locks of hair as heavy breaths are pried from your lips along with whispers of his name falling from those beautiful lips of yours. "Enjoying it, darling ... am I being good for you? Am I a good boy? Tell me I'm a good boy, kitten ..." He purrs erotically, his words roll gracefully off his tongue before he buries his tongue back into you, kissing, licking, and sucking on all of your sweet spots. "Good boy ...! Oh, so good ... fuck I missed your mouth so much ..." You whine needily, clutching at the sheets beneath you as you lick your lips, waves, and waves of heated ecstasy washes over you in sharp and powerful waves.

"That's it ...! Fuck, don't stop ... don't stop fucking me with that tongue of yours ...!" You cry out in a series of moans that are soon followed by ragged breaths, you grind your hips against his mouth eager and aching for some form of release, eager for more of the ecstasy he gives you. But he suddenly stops as he can barely hold himself back from taking you right here and right now, he begins to unzip his pants and fights to get them off. An annoyed expression twists onto your face as you roll your eyes and get up from the bed, grabbing him by his shoulders and turning him around towards the bed as you push him onto the bed with a devilish grin. "It's my turn, love ..." You chuckle as you begin to straddle his lap with your arms pressed into his chest and you begin to take him inside of you as a heavy breathless moan of his name leaves your lips the moment his thick cock fills you. It throbs and twitches inside of you, making you nearly jump at the sensation before you take all of his thick throbbing cock inside of you, the way he fills you is like no other, his cock stretches you and fills you perfectly. The way your walls clung and hugged his thick throbbing cock drove him insane, a heavy groan left his lips at the tight heat that surrounded and embraced his throbbing cock. "Oh, fucking hell ...! Shit ... so damn tight and ... hot ... come on, darling ride me nice and hard. Leave me at your mercy ..." He purrs devilishly as a long chuckle soon follows after, lust clouds his remarkable green eyes, his hands reach up to cup your flushed cheeks as a warm joyful smile curls onto his lips. You smile back at him, joy washing over you like a breeze as you rested your hands upon his shoulders and began to chase eagerly and joyfully after your sweet and euphoric release. Your hips grind and roll against his lap, heavy breaths are pried from your lips as heat begins to build and rise through your body, Karl's heavy ragged breaths can be heard along with yours as he wraps his arms around your neck. A low "fuck" leaves his parted lips as his eyelashes weigh heavy on top of his shut eyelids, sharp electric sensations of bliss shot through him every time your hips went lower. Burying his teeth into his bottom lip, a heavy groan leaves his lips at the blissful heat that envelopes his throbbing eager cock, all he can do is stare in awe at your expressions of bliss and ecstasy. It's so amazing.

"Mmh, baby ... you're so goddamn beautiful ... so exquisite. Come on, tell me how much you love me ... show me how much you've missed me ..." He purrs with a devilish smile on his lips, biting his lips soon afterward he places his hands on your hips gently moving them back and forth just to speed things up a bit. Your cheeks quickly become flushed at his words as you lightly squeeze onto his shoulders, heavy breaths still leaving your parted lips as you begin to throw your hips up and down onto his thick throbbing cock. It presses and drives into you eagerly, lightly hitting your sweet spot causing whines of Karl's name to be pried from your lips, licking your lips you entangle Karl into another heated passionate kiss that is so full of tenderness and consideration. "Karl ...! F-fuck ...!" You whine needily as you pull away from his lips, your eyes flutter at the bliss that courses through you as the heat floods through you. Your teeth grind against your bottom lip gently before you begin to slam your hips down onto his throbbing cock that perfectly curled onto your sweet spot as it repeatedly hits that sweet spot making his name fall from your lips again and again. "Oh! Karl ...! Mmh, Karl ...! It's so fuckin good, Karl ...!" You moan breathlessly, throwing your head back at the ecstasy that washes over you in burning relentless waves, skin hitting against skin echoed through his bedroom as your moans and heavy breaths are Karl's melody. Groaning deeply, his hands move lower onto your ass cheeks, wrapping his fingers around the area he lightly squeezes them with a chuckle following after, it's not a minute before he's nearly arching his back and a long whine is pried from his throat. "Fucking hell, sweetheart ...! Ooh, hah ...!" He whines deeply as waves and waves of ecstasy washed over him, he couldn't be happier and everything in his being felt like it could cry of joy. "Karl ... I'm gonna ... oh fuck ... fuck ... gonna c-cum!" You manage to say, heavy breaths fill your throat and your heart thrashes and pounds erratically in your chest, thighs tremble and shake against his legs, and your entire body throbs and aches. "Kiss me, oh please kiss me ... tell me how much you love me ..." Karl rambles in a series of heavy breaths as he wraps his arms around your torso, leaning in for another heated kiss as you continue to slam your hips down as hard as you can moaning shamelessly against his lips. Your entire body trembles and pulsates erratically as you had boiled over, heat travels through you along with sweet sweet ecstasy that left you nearly screaming his name against his lips. Pulling away from his lips as heavy ragged breaths leave your lips, you gaze intensely, it's not moments before your name falls breathlessly from his parted lips and his expression of joy quickly fades into one of ecstasy and relief. Sharp powerful sensations of ecstasy shot through him relentlessly as began to cling to you, wrapping his arms around you clinging to you and to what for a second feels so much like a damn dream.

Wrapping your arms around him, you find serenity in his cool embrace and you find serenity in the idea that things are gonna be okay, that things are gonna change from today to hopefully years from now. You smile into his embrace before pulling out of his embrace, moments later as you gaze into each other's eyes once more, passion and warmth clouded his green eyes. That look in his eyes like he was just so ... happy and like you're the one thing that matters in his erratic and wild world. "So ... Karl, what's next for us? ... After Miranda is dead and all that bullshit ...?" You question with a curious smile resting upon your lips, you rest in his embrace and he can't help but chuckle at your words. "Whatever it is that is next for you ... whether it's fucking staying here or leaving for better places ... you go and I'll follow." He answers warmly and confidently as a chuckle soon follows after his words. "Oh, so I made you my loyal dog, have I?" You chuckle, beaming at the man before you as he can't help but chuckle once more at your words. "In a way, yes you have ... made me weak for you ... made me unafraid to be myself around you. ... You are incredibly special to me, butterfly ..." He says in a gentle breath, smiling warmly at you as you can't help but flush different shades of red at his words. "You're even more special ... I love you more than you will ever know Karl ... and I've loved you all this time ... I hope I will never stop loving you. That no matter how bad things get that we will get through it together." You exclaim in pure joy as you both end up smiling sheepishly at each other before you rest your head in the nape of his neck and he wraps his arms around, hoping for a more optimistic and brighter future than he could've ever imagined.

[raebayhc]

Girls Night Out

PART TWO!!!

warnings: smut, oral sex (f), fingering, public sex acts, car sex, use of alcohol, manipulation

word count: 2070

summary: you along with your groups of friends decide to have a girls' night for the first time in a while, things get heated and your friends end up taking turns using your body.

series: part 1 (more parts to come)

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Finally making your way through the crowd you make it back to the group of girls who had already begun to drink. Mikasa’s hand finds purchase on your waist as she pulls you closer to hand you a drink “it’s fruity, you’ll like it” Mikasa knew you weren’t a heavy drinker but when you did drink you preferred fruitier things, you giggled at the thought of her ordering something so girly with the sole intent on giving it to you. You happily took the drink from her hand giving her a warm smile, taking a sip she watches your reaction as your face lights up “holy shit mik- this is awesome” she takes a sip of her rich colored drink “let me taste” you obliged as you held your glass up for her, she goes to hand you her drink but you decline “no thanks, that stuff tastes like rat poison.. I’m better off with my drink from paradise” you laugh, she lets out a small chuckle at your cuteness “just try it y/n I promise it’s not that bad”.. “Ughhhhhh fiiiiiine only because it’s you mik” you reply hesitantly. You both lift your drinks to the mouth of the other, not breaking eye contact you take a sip, and as does she, almost as if it was planned yall both swallow squint grunt then let out a small cough a visual representation of how yall felt about each other’s drinks “how do you drink this shit?? Bleh” Mikasa spits out “it’s better than the jet fuel you have in this glass” you shiver out.

The night goes on and all of the ladies are around the bar talking, yall somehow landed on your childhood and how yall used to run around outside all day and play in the woods behind your neighborhood. Mikasa continues to tell the story of how yall have matching scars on the same place at the top of your inner thigh from when yall collided bikes one time as if she needed proof she lifted your skirt to look at the scar, a reminder maybe, “see! Told yall it really happened and I have the same exact one too!” she lets your skirt back down and the girls disperse throughout the building, some dancing, some talking to guys for potential hookups. You and mik still at the bar talking. She cuts your sentence short “wait actually let me see your scar again I think it shrunk” without getting confirmation from you she lifts your skirt and underestimating the length it would take for her to reach the scar she overshot and instead of rubbing the scar she rubs the thigh right against one of your folds, a small whimper falls out of your throat, you didn’t mean to let it out it just kind of happened. Your stomach drops, her eyes dart up to your face, a deep blush forming that you can’t control. She cocks an eyebrow at you and slowly begins to move her hand up closer and closer to your sex, your grip on the bar counter becoming tighter “mik what the fuck are you doing” you spit out through gritted teeth. “I haven’t stopped thinking about earlier… yah know when we basically kissed in the theatre, I haven’t gotten you out of my mind since.” her words lit a flame in you, not only because of how seductive they were but because you were definitely attracted to her, you always have been but you would never dare to speak on it.

“I’ve kept this to myself for far too long don’t you think?” she asks, not able to push out any words fearing you would instead release a moan you nod, your eyebrows scrunched on your forehead, your bottom lip tucked between your teeth, eyes glossy, nipples erect and visible through your thin shirt….. She couldn’t help herself. Slipping a finger into your underwear she groans at how wet you already are “all this… for me baby?” she purrs into your ear. “Mik…. we’re at a bar, there are people everywhere… please..” you whine out, she replies with a simple “trust me”, grabbing your jaw and forcing you to face her she grabs her drink opens your mouth and pours it in “spit it out or swallow it and you’ll regret it” you wince and nod your head obediently “good girl” she purrs.

Now basically crumbling under her touch your thighs are shaky, breathing erratic as you can only breath through your nose due to the rich liquid sheltered in your mouth. She positions her fingers to shape a gun, she then points her ‘hand gun’ at you and ‘pulls the trigger’ taking that same position she pushes into you, knowing you would react to this she lets out a loud cough to cover your moan, thank goodness she did. You’re vocal she likes that. Now pushing in and out of you she takes her left hand and grabs your neck then pulls you to kiss, her tongue prodding at your lips signaling you to open for her, the deep liquid flows into her mouth dripping down your chins, she swallows the liquid but remains in contact with your face against her occasionally biting or sucking on your lip. You knew there were definitely going to be marks later but you didn’t care, this was pure bliss and just the thought of Mikasa getting aroused by this was enough to send you over the edge, your vision gone blurry, your body shaking, reaching your climax. You droop your head down breathing heavy, worried she had crossed a line Mikasa lifted your head only to see a blissful fucked out expression, eyes hazy, drool falling down your chin, your mouth in a slight smirk, tears threatening to fall. “Oh, shit” she mumbles now fully aware of the effect you have on her.

Removing her fingers from under your skirt she dips her fingers in your drinks and encourages you to take them in your mouth which you do without a fight, a low groan escapes your lips as you taste the sweet and salty mixture of your juices, her sweat, and your ‘drink from paradise’ on her digits. Pulling her fingers out with a loud ‘pop’ she pulls a napkin from under her drink and wipes them off. Still recovering from the previous climax you sit there catching your breath, Mikasa’s hand finds its way to the small of your back, she leans into your neck giving you small pecks then comes up to your ear and nibbles on it a bit “.... y’know… there’s so much more I want to do to you.. Bee.” your skin shivers at the name she had given you when yall were in the sixth grade after you got chased by a bee into a creek, you hadn’t heard it in years… she really was something.

You only had one drink so you were nowhere near tipsy, sober as can be….. Unfortunately that cant be said for some of the other ladies. Ymir, Sasha, and Hitch were all out of it fortunately enough you, mikasa, and historia were all sober so yall could drive, you decide to take responsibility for hitch and drive her to the barn. You put her arm around your shoulder “shit. Why the fuck are you so heavy hitch, youre tiny” you spit out struggling to support her weight on you as you walk her to the car “h- hey-*hiccup* hey. Im not heavy I just had done a cartwheel sometimes earlier when she asked me to”. Yup. she’s out of if you think, you’re on the road and on the way to Sasha’s family barn when hitch yells at you to pull into an empty parking lot so she can get air a possibly throw up. Y’know the basic drunk shenanigans. You pull over to what seems to be a deserted parking lot with a raccoon and some dead bushes “okay hitch hurry up” “yeah yeah I’m going I’m going” she seems to have sobered up a bit.. *click* the passenger door opens and the car lights come on “hurry up they’re wai-” you’re cut off by the image in front of you. Wearing nothing but her underwear hitch had removed all of her clothing including her bra revealing her numerous piercings including a belly button and nipple piercings, not only that but she had one hand down her panties moving around doing what you assume is masturbating and her other hand squeezing her nipple “mmph please..please.. Help me will you pretty girl?” butterflies filled your stomach “what’re you-”

Hitch climbs halfway in with her hand on the middle console and one of her knees on the passenger seat, grabbing the collar of your shirt she pulls you in for a sloppy kiss, your grip on the wheel loosens as you lose yourself in the kiss, not only that but you notice she doesn’t taste of alcohol, not even the slightest bit. In fact, you remember about a month ago when she said she was gonna stop drinking and when yall were in the club you only saw her with cans of soda when you did happen to catch a peek of her.. Was she- “faking?” your thoughts cut off by her sudden comment “you know you’re really easy to read y/n, I can tell what’s going on in that pretty little brain of yours honey.” “so were you? Faking I mean.” you say in a confused tone as if you were trying to piece it all together yourself “yeahhhhh sorry but I had to get you alone somehow, don’t think I didn’t notice how Mikasa and historia were all over you tonight, it wasn’t rocket science to figure out they probably fucked you..and to be honest I’ve thought about us together. So please… have me?” she takes your hand and shoves it down her panties, black and lacey, you retract your hand and look at her without saying anything. Worried she might have done something wrong she begins “oh my god I got the wrong idea y/n I’m so so sor-” “get in the back” you cut her off.

Climbing in the back she waits on instructions from you, you join her in the back. You position yourself on top of her laying her head on the back door, you scan over her helpless body so small and fragile under your touch, starting by kissing her breasts leaving marks on the sides of them you move down to her torso. Giving sweet and soft kisses occasionally leaving a hickey or two, you make it down to her covered pussy, kissing above the lacey garment you tease her. “Please y/n please please please I can’t” she begs “I got it I got it” you pull her underwear to the side she releases a sigh of relief not long after followed a scream of pleasure as you plunge your face into her sex, lapping up whatever juices are flowing and gently sucking on the bundle of nerves at the top. “N-not so.. fast y/n... I won’t… I won’t last!!” she manages out through broken whimpers and cries, which only encourages you to break her even more, make her cry out an orgasm, make her the best little pet you could ask for. You stick a ring and middle finger inside of her while your mouth focuses on her clit, not that pushes her over the edge. Her mind blanks and all she can see is white, you speed up to enhance her orgasm, you’re then met with the strong bursts of fluid that fall from her. “She’s a squirter huh” you think to yourself hungrily lapping up as many juices as possible, “mmhmm y/n y/n y/n ahh please you’re so-” her body twitches “you’re so amazing mmm”. You remove your fingers and place her panties back where they belong, sitting up adoring her aroused figure you spit out “you think you’d top me huh?” followed by a cheeky grin and a condescending giggle.

The car lights up and a ring echoes “Ymir” flashes on the dashboard “incoming call”...

THE EEENNNDDD pt.2

AHHHHHH IM SO OVERWHELMED BY THE POSITIVITY AND LOVELY FEEDBACK I LOVE YALL AWHHHH!!! I will continue to write and upload for this series!! Thank you for the patience *muah*

[buck-yyyy]

i’m gonna tell some stories because i’m in a nostalgic mood and also i want to

when i was.. 9, i think, i made a skateboard with my dad. like, forming the plywood with a vacuum bag and everything. it’s shaped like a squirrel :) but in order to cut out the skateboard, we needed to use a jigsaw. i was super hyped, we got it all clamped down and everything, he shows me how to use it, etc etc. i get it in my hands. he turns it on. i lose my shit.

the vibrations from the jigsaw felt so fucking horrible. they were in my hands, but spread down my arms, all shaky and gross, filling my entire body with this awful sensation of just oh fuck no.

my dad turns it off, i explain, and he tells me that because it’s mine, i need to at least finish most of the cutting (which i think is fair, since it was such a big part of the project to cut it out). im pretty sure i cried at one point, but at a certain point i guess i did enough, and he ended up finishing it off for me.

then we get to the sanding. and for the sanding, we had to use a power sander. same. fucking. thing. i think i managed to beg my way out of it, so my dad had to do most of the sanding (love ya dad)

anyways, i still have the skateboard. i’m so shit at skateboarding, and honestly the board is not the right shape to actually be able to do anything. but what i would do with it was i would take it outside and lay down on my belly on the board, then push myself down the sidewalk while i picked up fireflies off the pavement and set them in the grass so they wouldn’t get stepped on.

i also remember that the sidewalk in front of our house had this little hole in it- like a big crack, about the size of the palm of my hand and a couple centimeters deep.

now, i was a warrior cats kid- and i always wanted to be a medicine cat (i loved jayfeather SO MUCH). so i would go around my neighborhood and collect flowers, leaves, and other various nature stuff, then take them over to the hole and grind them all into a pulp with a stick or a rock or something.

i distinctly remember i would super carefully squeeze all of the juice out of the dandelion stem, then detach the head of the dandelion and pick off each individual petal to put in the hole.

some people down the street from us had a pear tree, and frequently pears would fall off the tree and just lay in the grass until they inevitably rotted. so what i would do, everytime that my mom and i would walk past the pear tree with our dog, was i would collect all the fallen pears. then, for the rest of our walk, i would scour the neighborhood for a big piece of bark. i would bring it all back home and set the bark on our front steps, then lay out all the pears on top of the bark, scatter some leaves and dandelion petals on top (and sometimes, when wild onions would grow in our yard, i would pull them and add those too) and then then just leave it there.

i was making a little platter for the neighborhood squirrels to come and eat off. i would always get SO excited when i saw that there were some little nibbles on the pears, cause it meant that some squirrels had eaten my gift- but more often than not, the “plates” would just sit there untouched until my mom tossed them out lol.

i was an odd kid, but i have a lot of really good memories :,)