#ill be the king of this ship... i need to give it a name...

[glamgoths]

so who is gonna write the 60k slow burn fanfic about Leo helping Jack escape the studio in the aftermath of the Halloween show and then slowly genuinely develop feelings for each other??? And then Jack coming to terms with how much he fucked up and has so many traumatic flashback moments + it also cuts to scenes in the past of Leo and Jack having some gay ass interactions.

or do I have to write that myself...

[venuscarrotsoup]

Gyomei and Kagaya friendship analysis/yap

Everybody overlooks this relationship, not on purpose of course, but it’s not really noticed. Yes, Ubuyashiki views all the demon slayers as his children, especially the hashira, but him and Gyomei have a special bond.

Side note: I find it cute how Kagaya calls all the demon slayers by their first names because no parent would call their child by their last name 😭💓🤞

Gyomei was around 18 when the temple incident happened, he was rescued by Kagaya shortly after, meaning he’s been close to Kagaya for around 9 years, allowing them to have a really close bond.

Kagaya did so much for Gyomei, he saved him from being executed, and saw him differently from everyone else. Gyomei felt like others viewed him as a monster after the incident, but Kagaya knew of his innocence, and saved him. And when Gyomei broke down, Kagaya held him and comforted him. Gyomei even stated that Kagaya would say exactly what one wanted to hear, he told Gyomei that he wasn’t a murderer, which caused Gyomei to break down, as he was experiencing guilt and self-loathing after that incident.

Gyomei would’ve been there to see the Ubuyashiki family grow, since all the kids are around 8 years old. I feel like Gyomei and Kagaya have been there for each other every step of the way, I believe they were good friends, despite having distance due to Kagaya’s status as the master.

Kagaya trusts all his children, but he had the most trust with Gyomei, because of that strengthened bond from all the time they’ve spent by each others side. Kagaya entrusted Gyomei with his plan, and I believe he also wanted to say a final goodbye to one of his closest friends, he knew Gyomei would understand, because he has such a kind, calm and understanding soul, he wouldn’t freak out, he would simply go along with the plan and carry it out in Kagaya’s honour.

I like these two images paired together, it’s a nice parallel. In the first image Gyomei is at his lowest, and had just escaped death, relieved and emotional due to Kagaya’s actions, and Kagaya is there to comfort him. In the second image, Kagaya is at his lowest, his illness at its worst, and he is about to meet death, Gyomei is there to support him. And of course, Gyomei is crying in both images, and Kagaya is smiling, just like his calm, serene self always is. It’s a nice contrast as Kagaya was part of the reason Gyomei escaped death, and gyomei was part of the plan that would ensue Kagaya’s death.

Their relationship truly is beautiful, and I wish we had a bit more content of their friendship, because I know it was a strong one.

Another detail I really liked is how gyomei got so angry here when sanemi disrespected Kagaya, veins were popping out of him and everything. Gyomei is normally a calm and collected guy, but Kagaya is literally such a good friend to Gyomei that he can’t stand anyone disrespecting him, that was such a nice detail.

Look at him, still trying to remain calm but not being able to mask his anger because Kagaya has just been screamed at by this roach. Gyomei obviously really appreciates Kagaya for what he did for him (freeing him from death.) and it’s so adorable.

In conclusion, what I’m trying to say here is that these two have a very good relationship/bond which is very underrated and overlooked. I only came to this conclusion when I first watched season 4 episode 8, as it’s not very obvious since the two act professional in the only episodes they’re together before that (s1 e22-23). Please nobody try and twist my words to make it out like I’m shipping the two because I’m not, key word in the title: FRIENDSHIP.

Kagaya himself is underrated as well, give my king some more attention!! Anyways if you read this THANK YOU SO MUCH, I needed to yap abt them, and plz any gyomei fans and even better, people who share the same views as me on this, moot me up on TikTok at @inlovewithkorra <3

[gold-snek-hoe]

Hello and welcome to Opinions from an Internet Nobody. Today's essay:

"Ger therapy" is the new "You need Jesus": One Weirdo's Navigation through Cultural Shame

This is a supposedly well-meaning sentiment that is often weaponized against people who are behaving outside of perceived cultural norms. It's a favorite of homophobes who see queerness/transness as a mental illness, but I've been seeing it used to demonize kink (which historically is often linked to queerness), and more generally any "weird" behavior that makes people uncomfortable.

For example, otherkin, systems (especially those with fictives), and people who take fictional characters as partners. Y'know, "weirdos" who "can't separate reality from fiction." And, sure, sometimes there can be a problem with that distinction, but I know as well as you that most internet strangers saying "get therapy" don't actually give a shit about the mental health of those they target. It's code for "your behavior makes me uncomfortable, stop it."

Same sentiment as "you need Jesus."

This has actually taken me a long time to figure out. I've been in therapy for my entire adult life, working through various traumas, severe depression, anxiety, all that. Those were the biggest problems as they negatively impacted, and often endangered, my life. It was only after my hospitalization in 2020, where I was finally put on much needed medication, that I could start to grow into myself.

I changed my name. I top surgery. I came out as polyamorous. I finally got my official autism diagnosis. Now I'm fuckin' married! But... there are still things I'm working through in therapy. Mainly, shame over my "weirder" behaviors. My current therapist has been a huge blessing in helping me accept the things I was too ashamed to admit.

Now, I feel comfortable enough to share.

I'm otherkin. Always have been. My connection to my humanity is tenuous, and I'm sure that's connected to my autism. When mad, I feel phantom horns sprouting from my forehead. I have a tail that swishes back and forth at the base of my spine. In my soul, I am monstrous, and years of therapy has not erased that.

I feel like I'm only half in the physical world most of the time. This doesn't hinder my real-world success (I graduated college Summa Cum Laude, have an IMDB page, and am on my third book), but informs the way I look at the world. There's a whole other universe in my head that hums along with me in my day-to-day. That's part of why I'm so skilled as a writer. To ask me to divorce from that is to tell me to stop existing. Sorry, it's how I've always operated.

Lastly, and this is the one I'm really anxious about, I have a fictional husband. Now, looking at my blog, you might say "yeah, no shit," but I don't just ship myself with him. I mean I practice pop-culture Witchcraft, and the Goblin King is my patron. I mean I have a Labyrinth-themed tarot deck that I talk to him with. I mean I held a ritual to spiritually marry him. Basically, I Snape-wived myself.

And guess what? My therapist isn't concerned. It's not hurting my ability to live my life. I have other interests, hobbies, and goals outside of him, which he actively encourages in all our tarot sessions! I wouldn't be doing this if he didn't support me. My IRL spouse is usually there for whatever magical shit I'm doing, and supports me! Some of my closest friends know, and the only complaint I've gotten is "this guy seems important to you, I wish you told me sooner." Hell, my MOTHER knows and supports me, which is huge, because our relationship was pretty damaged after I came out as trans.

If you have a problem with the way I live my life, when literally nobody else does, take a good long look at why. You don't give a fuck about my mental health. You just don't like that I'm weird.

Tl;dr: My mental health is better than it's ever been since embracing the weird, so leave me and my imaginary husband Marak Sixfinger alone.

[mynoiii]

Tigeress and prince Renae headcanons

Cause no, I will not stop talking about them. They are my absolute favorites, and I need to see them on my timeline more often

These are just some silly things I made up in the AM, some of these are angsty and kinda sad LOL so enjoy lol.This got super Long for some reason? lol. Might do other characters cause this is fun, i enjoy talking into the void.

Grammer was not checked.

Also, snice more content is coming out. I'm hoping that around next year, I can post a newer video in regards to more lore and new things I've discovered since my last video 🫠

_________________________🐅👑_________________________

When the prince and tigeress were kids, he made a deal with her that she would be his ' right hand man ' when he became the king/emperor

The queen made tigeress take Etiquette classes to tame her wild and big personality; she failed.

The queens next best bet was to sign tigeress up to be his knight when she's older

Tigeress father knew the two had a crush on each other and found it pretty funny

The two would sneak into balls to watch the dances and listen to exchanges, snice they weren't old enough to attend themselves yet

Tigeress mother was actually from a well-respected old money rich family ( not in the empire, I'm thinking more stealgate ), but she was disowned after running away with pirates

They both have " spoiled rich kid " Attitudes.

The prince is more petty, but tigeress knows how to humble him

They've been friends from snice they we're 6years old to 14years old

Tigeress is the shortest out of all the listeners

Both in the old series and new one tigeress reputation gets around fast, intica looks for the ship often on their seas in hopes they can tempt/convince her to join their army

The prince would sometimes watch and listen to tigeress father teach her new fighting techniques snice he himself can't join in to learn, her father has made efforts to let him join the lessons..but he wants to follow his mother's orders and chooses to sit out

The prince is a hardcore lightweight compared to tigeress who can handle her liquor

These two would find places to hide together in the castle, and it would stress EVERYONE out, eyes gotta be on them 24/7, or THEY WILL go missing for a good few hours

The prince shows tigeress old historic things from around gorgeous era. They both love reading old journal entry together and learning about the old world.

Castle staff loved watching the two hangouts and playing with each other. They got sad when tigeress ' left ' the castle. The prince never looked so sad and bored in his life.

Sad headcanons cause their my personal favorite

The prince father passed away before he was born

For some reason, tigeress mom never trusted Darius, and while she was alive, she made sure her daughter was never in his way

Tigeress mother passed away due to illness when she was 8; 14 is when her father was hanged.

To remember tigeress the prince kept her old play sword; he also kept any ' treasures ' she would give him after her and her father left the empire for ' business ' this is where his love of gold accessories comes from.these items are hidden away from his mother

Tigeress does not call Darius ( the new captain ) captain. She calls him by his name and sticks to that only, she kinda does not recognize him as her captain, but she wouldn't openly admit that

Tigeress does not allow ANYONE to touch or wear her father's old captain hat. She herself doesn't even wear it. Darius was forced to get a brand new one commissioned, and tigeress made sure it didn't look like her father's

On the ship, her father had a private captain study, only he, his wife, and, of course, tigeress was allowed in. After his death, only one key remained. Tigeress has that key and has locked the room snice his death; no one is allowed in the room. Ever.

The prince watched the shoreline everyday in hopes he would see his old friends ship dock.he stopped watching when he turned 17

While the prince mother lied to him about tigeress were abouts he would Secretly give sailors missing flyers in hopes his friend would return

The queen was generally confused when she could not find tigeress after her father hanging. She had sent the guards to the shore lines, across the city, even checked some of her and the prince hiding spots in the castle...but nothing came up she gave up looking after 3 days and deemed she was just taken.

Dispite Tigeress not being the most high rank on the ship now under a new captain her room on the ship is the captains suite, she gave Darius her old room after her father's hanging, Darius allowed this knowing tigeress was extremely close with her parents ( probs the only nice thing he's ever done for her)

Despite her father last wishing of tigeress making it to the ship, she was kicking and scearming, not wanting to leave the empire. It was like a 3 home to her.

She wanted to write renae letters, but Darius stopped her every time in hopes that one day in the future, he could use tigeress for a bigger plan, AKA kidnapping the prince when she was an adult.

Lol that's it, this was fun ☺️🤪

Might do a post about how all the cast feels about eachother cause that would be fun.

[falena-kingscholar]

Welcome to Sunset Savanna!

The king is a very busy man with lots to attend to, so I'll be taking care of all the administrative stuff so you all can have your fun!

My name is V, you can call me the royal advisor if you really wanted, and I'm here to keep everything running smoothly, keep this blog a safe place, and make sure everyone is having fun. In order to do that, of course, there have to be rules, so let me make this short and sweet as I can for you!

Bigots, terfs, racists, p*dos, you're all on the DNI list. I will block you if you come on my blog with the intention to harm someone else, or openly admit these values.

Being an advisor means I've got plenty on my plate beyond this blog. There is a real person running all this, with my own life to live. Please be patient and understanding.

Have fun!! If I or someone else is making you uncomfortable, feel free to let me know so I can set things right.

Limit your NSFW. I don't mind if you're thirsty to a certain extent, and I'm fine with cursing. Keep in mind that the RP community on Tumblr is diverse both in gender + sexuality, but also in age and I would like to keep this page friendly to everyone.

OCs, MCs and other Canon characters are welcome to interact. Just as a bit of a heads up, I'm not super comfortable shipping Falena with anyone besides his wife - but if you read below you'll see why that's a little rocky too.

This is a HEADCANON version of Falena. Below is a short description of how I interpret him and a few of his relationships. This is to ensure I enjoy the character I'm playing. This does not mean I'm not open to feedback or constructive criticism, just be respectful please.

Get To Know The King

He's fairly jovial and upbeat most of the time

He's really bad about just listening to problems - he likes to solve them

He and his wife are in a bit of weird spot - it's because he's still a closeted gay and it's impacted their marriage. He loves her still, just more platonically than romantically. They agreed to have a kid in hopes of repairing the rift they were both feeling, and it kind of worked, but he still really needs to be honest about his feelings Soon

Cheka is the one person he loves more than ANYONE and often comes across as a bit of an overbearing dad he's totally not just adding on to loving Cheka with all the love he wishes his brother would accept

The age gap between him and Leona? GUESS WHAT, I, THE PERSON BEHIND THE SCREEN HAVE THAT SAME AGE GAP WITH MY SISTERS (twins) (however we are still close and besties so I know. the Opposite of what I did is what I need to do for Falena sldkjfhlskdjf /hj)

That being said, Falena has a strained relationship with Leona that he has only recently come to notice now that Leona isn't around as often. He really wants to make amends, but feels like a complete stranger to his own brother and it shows in his interactions - he still kind of treats Leona like he's 6-13 because that's the Leona he remembers - the one who was still excited to see him when he came home from RSA. It wasn't until Falena was 19 that he noticed a bit of a rift. They started getting closer, then when Falena was 21 he was coronated and got married to his betrothed as his father fell ill.

Thank you for reading all of that! All that's left is to give credit where it's due.

The beautiful portrait done of his Royal Highness used as the face of this page, (with permission), was done by none other than @/lemonwerewolf here.

Dividers were made by @/saradika-graphics, here.

If the way I write seems familiar to you, you might recognize me from @twistedwonderlandshenanigans , my HC's and general writing blog for twst. (I follow from @/symphonicmetal101 though)

Thank you again, the King and I hope you enjoy your stay here,

In Sunset Savanna

[althea-and-alcestris]

TWST Game of Thrones AU

So before I begin explaining. Yes I am aware how dark the series is and for that, I wrote out all the inc3st, forced intimacy, problematic aspects of the story. I however do not shy away from giving a kill count to an AU and that's not gonna be any different here.

So the main plot remains. 7 Kingdoms/Houses battle against one another for the main throne and also fending against the ones outside the wall. The cast is sorted into mixed groups and I also included ocs this time too. This also messes with the canon timeline since some characters arent supposed to coexist with the current cast and also includes relatives (mentioned or shown)

House Aurum (House of Gold)

-King Henrik -Dawn Knight -Ace Trappola -Ace's brother -Albert Cardinal -Althea Cardinal -Juliette Lionhart -Princess Leia

House Bestia (House of Beasts)

-Leona Kingscholar -Cheka Kingscholar -Falena Kingscholar -Rin Kousei -Vega Zavattari -Jack Howl -Meng Yao Li -Luca Volpe -Ametist Crystal -Jamil Viper -Najma Viper -Ashton Vargas -Kifaji

House Coronis (House of Crows)

-Dire Crowley -Yurika -Fauna -Haru Yuudai -Epel Felmier -Marja Felmier -Ruggie Bucchi -Ruggie's grandmother -Mozus Trein -Kalim Al Asim -Cater Diamond

House Nobilis Dracones (House of Noble Dragons)

-Meleanor Draconia -Malleus Draconia -Lilia Vanrouge -Silver Vanrouge -Baul Zigvolt -Sebek Zigvolt -Zigvolt parents -Alcestris Zigvolt -Allen Alagona -Deuce Spade -Dilla Spade -Evander Ngam -Lamon Ngam -Augustino De La Bete

House Profundum (House of the Abyss)

-Azul Ashengrotto -Azul's mother -Jade & Floyd Leech -Leech parents -Idia & Ortho Shroud -Marina Seabrook -Gideon & Debby Campbell (excluded from the house)

House Rosae (House of Roses)

-Riddle Rosehearts -Mrs. Rosehearts -Trey Clover -Clover parents -Blanche Picard -Neige LeBlanche -Chenya

House Venenum (House of Poison)

-Eric Venue -Vil Schoenheit -Rook Hunt -Soleil Auclair -Divus Crewel -Marqu Camilleri -Bai Chenfeng -Sylas Armani -Angel Poupée -Pixel (will need a more old fashioned name) -Elion Kato -Ambrose the 63th

Strays

-Cain -Robo

I only have chunks of the story but. But I have the kill list

Kill list

-Silver (shot by an arrow infront of Lilia to wage war) -Yurika (Asssassinated) -Baul (poisoned) -Ortho (Dies protecting Idia in an ambush) -Trey (killed by Leona) -Kalim (Assassinated) -Dilla (Dies to a disease) -Meleanor (killed by the enemy) -Falena (Assassination) -Ace's brother (executed) -Mrs. Rosehearts (killed by Riddle) -Neige (poisoned) -Ruggie's grandmother (illness) -Henrik (Killed by Sebek) -Albert (Killed by Sebek) -Najma (Killed by the interrogation) -Gideon (Dies while protecting Blanche) -Augustino (Executed) -Pixel (???) -Haru (Killed by Trey due to an accident) -Marqu (Executed) -Evander (Executed) -Jack (Dies on the battlefield)

Silver is shot by a soldier from House Aurum as a way to wage war Baul is poisoned because he's believed to be a serious threat to House Venenum alongside Alce Trey is killed by Leona because of Haru's demise Kalim is assassinated because he's a noble Meleanor is killed because she was the previous queen of Nobilis Dracones and a feared one at that Falena is assassinated because he's king Ace's brother is executed for stepping up against the king for Thea's sake Mrs. Rosehearts is killed by Riddle for her abuse Neige is poisoned by Vil Henrik and Albert are killed by Sebek who wanted Thea safe Najma dies from the interrogation she was put under for a crime she didn't commit

Ships:

Sebek x Thea Allen x Deuce Ace x Fauna Silver x Sylas Haru x Trey x Leona Augustino x Chenfeng Rook x Soleil Very subtle Lilia x Baul Alce x Najma and later Alce x Juliette Gideon x Blanche Ami x Divus

If anyone has questions just dm me or ask me in my ask box, I'll gladly answer because it's a bit jumbled right now.

Ocs belong to:

Allen, Marqu, Gideon, Debby - @raguiras Angel, Meng Yao, Yurika, Fauna - @ang33333333l Sylas, Elion, Evander, Lamon, Cain, Robo, Haru - @vanrouge13 Vega, Blanche, Soleil, Marina - @nyx-of-night Augustino, Chenfeng - @spookyavenuestreet Pixel, Rin, Luca - @heyhellohihowareyou

[edsheerankinnie]

favourite less common mlp ship? also if you want to rant about them please do!!!!

ooh this is a tuff one bc i dont have a FAVORITE favorite per say. but there are a couple i do enjoy!

soarburn: ok so i actually wrote a fic on this! Ik theres absolutely no basis for this in or outside of the show, but part of what makes it so fun is imagining all the interactions they COULD have. I mean, think about it, Braeburn's super extroverted, charming, and hospitable; Soarin's an accomplished athlete, plus hes friendly and simplistic--kind of reminds me of their female counterpart (appledash). Like guys imagine Soarin in his suit and Braeburn ~flirting~ w him.. ouhhh imagine their banter !!

lunajack: ok ive actually seen some rlly good takes that got me on this ship! If i didnt hc Luna as aroace it'd 1000% be one of my top ships of all time. They could have such a good princess x pauper dynamic, a high society royal x simpleton farmer union. Plus like others have said, Applejack is one of the most people ponies ever and has this inherent, idk kindness?? and Luna meanwhile has this huge distance from others because of her years of exile, her particular role as a princess, and all of the walls shes built up from the guilt of nightmare moon. She was one of the first ponies to try and connect to luna in the most welcoming way possible despite her aura that one time she visited ponyville. Hell even luna called her "fair Applejack" at some point😭 like u cannot tell me aj's heart didnt at LEAST skip a beat😭. imagine being a farmgirl just hangin out in a scarecrow fit on nightmare night and the literal goddess of the moon calls you "fair" in return for some of your help, im weakkhjghfhgjfg

sugarmacbra: So actually im (sort of) writing a fic on this. The only reason it exists is bc i recently found out big mac is canonically bi and polyamorous (at least according to his VA), and im a sucker for a good polycule. That added with sugarmac (which i adore) and the fact that King Sombra is literally also bi, i was like, hey, what if we combined these elements, right?? Anyways, im not so much a fan of the dynamic that exists so far as i am of the idea of big mac in the most bisexual polycule ever, but who knows? maybe ill continue the fic and create the most life-changing heart-wrenching three-way pony love story

Cadance x Shining Armor x King Sombra (their ship names suck😭): Speaking of polycules, this one has a lot of potential. Sure, shining Armor is the straightest guy alive, but if we could pretend hes bisexual for a minute, i think him and Sombra in particular could have a LOT of chemistry. Plus given how hes basically smitten w his wife, i love the idea of him being in love w BOTH of them, like, more love for the golden retriever himbo !! Ik its not a super fleshed out especially on cadance's end, but the potential is there. Also, this ship has nothing to do w *that* ao3 fic (and if u dont know what im talking about i promise u dont need to see it. its gross).

somburn: I think we can all agree on braeburn giving massive fruit vibes, plus his overall personality. I was actually really inspired by this one post. I kind of need this to be real now. I love the idea of this evil fuckin guy having a sweet spot for plain ol Braeburn, who in contrast chooses not to see sombra as an evil threat but instead a smexy hot hunk. And to top it off, he "tames" Sombra/Sombra sort of changes for the better to be w him? Honestly its so cute.

anddd thats all i can think of atm lol. this took me way longer than i expected to answer

[msfcatlover]

@alycat76​ : Can you give me the low urban fantasy AU? 

YES! YES I ABSOLUTELY CAN!!! Ah, you have no idea how much I love this one!!!

Okay, so! This AU was actually born directly from my frustration with a bunch of Urban Fantasy AUs (and original stories, if we’re being real here.) Namely, that those stories will so often be like, “These magical beings are very, very rare,” and then the entire cast will be mystical beings of one sort or another. And I was like, “You can totally tell an engaging story in a world like this with an almost entirely human cast. You don’t even have to cut out the magic element or fun world building!” (And yes, that first part does accurately describe my Monster!Kids AU. Shhhhh, let me have my hypocrisy.)

I wanted to do that, and my brain is 90% Batfam brainrot right now, so here’s what I came up with.

(CW for minor mentions of sickness, canon character death, and child abuse. Bruce is not the abuser, for the record. But mentions are there. Also, Jason’s body is not restored to its pre-death state, and I do describe some of the things that would’ve been done to prep him for his funeral.)

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Very first point: Bruce’s tie to Gotham is more than just his love & dedication to his city. The Wayne family are supposedly one of the oldest families in the city, and of those old families they’re possibly (I’m still a little unclear here) the only one not tied to the Court of Owls? They’re the ones most dedicated to improving Gotham and ending its corruption, anyway. So let’s do something with that, shall we?

The Wayne bloodline has a bond with the city. Some might call it a blessing, some might call it a curse. The eldest member of the family is a Fisher King; the health of the Lord is tied directly to that of the city. When the Lord is sick, the city suffers; when the city suffers, the Lord feels its pain. And for generations, the head of the family has near-always been ill. Bruce has vivid memories of his father retching over the toilet, or calling in sick because the trembling was too much for Thomas to risk operating on patients (they are, depressingly, some of the most vivid memories Bruce has of his father.) As a member of the family, Bruce could see the marks just under his father’s skin, from ink-black to bruise-yellow and every sickly color in between, that nobody else seemed to see (Zatanna did, and she was the only outsider to assure Bruce he wasn’t crazy over it, but there’s only so much she could do for him.) It was terrifying for a young boy to see his father so ill, but Thomas promised Bruce that even though it was a “family condition,” Thomas & Martha were working on it; Thomas promised his son that by the time Bruce had to worry about it, they’d have made enough progress that Bruce would hardly even notice it.

Of course, that’s not what happened. Thomas was actually feeling well that night, better than he had in months, and wanted to go out to celebrate. Martha chose the restaurant and Bruce chose the movie. And maybe, if Thomas had kept feeling well, if he hadn’t had to stop to catch his breath, if the family hadn’t stepped into that specific alley to avoid blocking the sidewalk... maybe things would’ve been different.

When Thomas Wayne breathed his last, his son collapsed under the weight of Gotham’s rot & suffering. Joe Chill assumed the bullet must’ve passed through one of the parents to hit the child, and fled in a panic.

The hospital could find nothing wrong with Bruce, but he saw the understanding in Alfred’s eyes when he arrived and the first thing Bruce said to Alfred was, “I think I’m dying.”

(In most legends, Fisher Kings cannot leave their homelands. The Waynes are slightly luckier, but the longer they are away, the more they... fade. Energy seeps out of them slowly, color leaves their skin, no amount of sleep is ever enough, and they eventually need to return to Gotham to recharge. Bruce’s record is 3yrs, and the doctors shipped him home basically in a coma.)

(Bruce swore he would never have children, never pass down his bloodline’s curse to an innocent child who should not have to carry it. He got a vasectomy as soon as he legally could. Needless to say, he was furious Talia would go so far as to create a clone-son for the two of them, violating both Bruce’s right to choose and cursing Damian to carry on that line of suffering.)

Bruce learned his city & body well enough that he can use it as a map. Not a map that would make sense to anyone else (street corners that are directly adjacent to eachother might be on completely different parts of him, like one on his ribs and the other behind his knee.) During the day, he uses his resources to try to treat Gotham’s suffering preventatively, going after unjust rules & systems, weaving a new security net for Gotham’s underclass, etc. At night, his methods are more surgical, cutting out the tumors & rot, while also taking the time to help as many individual citizens as he possibly can.

As the legend of the Batman grows, reality starts to bend ever so slightly under the weight of it. He jumps further & more accurately than a man of his bulk should be able to, can always find the perfect corner to hide in, always has something to grab when he falls off a building.

Despite all the suffering Gotham causes Bruce Wayne, he still loves his city. And the city loves him back.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Second point: Dick Grayson is human, and he doesn’t exactly have any magic of his own. It’s... I’m calling it “being a conduit.” Basically, Dick resonates with any magic in his vicinity. He’s very sensitive to the presence of magic, to the point of it being basically a sixth sense, and on an instinctive level he attunes himself to any natural or environmental magic around him. To a very limited degree, he can even take on a few traits of what that magic is, but not... he can’t tune into a fire spell and burn you with a touch, but when he’s resonating with Gotham, he is slightly more resistant to poisoning.

It’s much, much rarer than being a magic user (though many magic users do eventually become conduits through sheer exposure,) but in the same way having perfect pitch is different from being able to sing.

...I’m making it sound so much more powerful than it actually is here. The main benefit Dick gets out of it is that when he attunes himself to any given city, the city will treat him as a native and most citizens just passing him in the street will assume he is too (this does not affect his ability to, say, speak the language or change his accent, it’s just his “vibes,” if that makes sense.)

As far as story goes, this means Dick can see Bruce’s curse-marks despite not being a member of his bloodline; if they’re in contact with eachother, Dick can even very faintly feel what the city is inflicting on Bruce at any given time. (This scares the absolute bejeezus out of Bruce when he realizes, as he immediately assumes he misinterpreted the curse, and “bloodline” just means “family,” or even “household,” and he’s cursed Dick as well just by offering him a home!) It also means that as soon as Robin becomes part of Batman’s legend, Dick can benefit from the city’s protections just like Bruce does.

It is, in fact, Dick who causes Bruce to realize there’s something more than just good luck happening, when Robin is thrown off a roof but fortunately finds a pole of some sort hidden by the building’s shadow to kick off from and make it to the next one over (this also triggers a rumor that Robin can fly, something Dick is more than happy to lean into with some tailoring on his cape, and yes, he does move even better & faster as a result.) The thing is, Bruce is certain there was no pole there, because he would’ve incorporated it into potential escape plans. And when he finally has the time to go back & check, after the fight is over, after Robin is safe... he’s right. The alley is empty. There’s no pole, no pipe, no nothing. But Dick definitely kicked off of something in mid-air, Dick’s not a metahuman or a magic user, he can’t double-jump or anything. Dick himself insists his foot just caught the top of a thin, flat cylinder, no more than two inches wide, just barely enough to jump from; Dick’s even pretty sure he saw the pole when he glanced behind him, sticking up out of the shadows. Nothing weird at all, except for how it doesn’t exist.

(When Jason dies, Gotham’s grief is strong enough to feel it all the way out in space. Dick doesn’t understand the heavy feeling in his heart, nor the sudden urgency to get home. He tells the other Titans to just drop him off in Gotham, but the closer they get, the worse Dick feels. When they actually break the city limits, Dick just melts into tears as Gotham’s pain howls through every inch of his body. Donna calls ahead, more than a little panicked, and nearly gives Alfred a heart attack with how worried & hesitant Donna is to just straight up say what’s wrong with Dick. She offers Dick the communicator, saying it’s Alfred on the line, and Dick snatches it out of her hand to ask the only coherent word any of them will hear from him for the rest of the day: “Who?”

When Alfred answers, Dick just... breaks. Right there in front of them. He’s trying to say something, something about that being wrong, something about having plans, but he can’t deny what he’s feeling, and he can’t seem to get the words out.

The Titans land in the Batcave, and refuse to leave. Fuck Batman’s rules, they’re not abandoning Dick... and Dick isn’t the only one who didn’t get to say goodbye.)

(Bruce & Dick still fight about it terribly once they’re finally alone. Bruce never once raises his hand to his son, but Dick tries to reach out to him, to touch Bruce’s hand and resonate, to literally share his pain, and Bruce jerks away saying, “Don’t, it’s not---”

Dick stares in shock & horror as both of them silently complete that sentence: It’s not real. If you asked Dick right in that moment, he’d say striking him would have hurt less.)

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Jason was human, fully human, with nothing special about him at all. Well, except for how Gotham loved him even more than Batman. The resonance Dick needs to wrap himself up in for Gotham to accept him, Jason has it echoing in his bones. He’s one of Gotham’s truest sons, he’s part of that city, and the city is part of him.

It’s not Superboy Prime’s reality breaking punch that brought Jason back from the dead. I... Look, I wrote a little nursery rhyme to explain it, and I’ve no idea if it’s any good (but it can’t be any worse than the Court of Owls’ rhyme, which has just a few too many syllables in certain lines for me to find whatever rhythm it’s supposed to have.)

Take me home to Gotham If I die far away Put me in her soil In a shallow grave

I don’t belong in Paris Or under London Town Don’t bury me in Tokyo Put me in Gotham ground

If you lose me out at sea In storm or dark of night I’ll swim back home to Gotham I’ll just follow the lights

Don’t send me off to Moscow Or drag me down to Rome I’m Gotham born and bred, my friend I only rest at home

Oh, take me home to Gotham If I die far away Put me in her soil In a shallow grave

I don’t need no tears or funerals Don’t miss me every day For I’ve come home to Gotham And right at home I’ll stay

(As far as most people are concerned, that’s where the rhyme ends. This next part is less well known, in-universe.)

I don’t want no fancy coffin Just put me in the ground Dig a hole on old Park Row And don’t let me be found

My soul belongs in Gotham She knows me blood and bone There is nowhere else that I may rest I’ll only toss and moan

But I’ll rest well in Gotham For two years and a day And if I’m feeling up to it I might even awake

So take me home to Gotham If I die far away You know I’ll only rest in peace In my shallow grave

...Yeah. This actually leads to a few traditions very specific to Gotham, like lighting a candle on someone’s grave on the anniversary of their death to help “lead them home,” or sitting vigil by their grave for the first 2-3 anniversaries. Lots of people don’t even know it has anything to do with this rhyme, it’s just part of Gotham’s culture.

Bruce & Dick of course know the whole rhyme and fight not to get their hopes up on the 2nd anniversary (have you seen that one post where Dick goes to smoke a cigarette for Jason on his grave, chokes on the smoke, and then Bruce shows up and they just silently share it? Yeah. Those vibes. Big those vibes.)

They made one crucial miscalculation, though: they calculated when Jason’s return would theoretically be from the time he died, not from when he was buried. Jason claws his way out of the ground just a day or two after they leave.

Now Jason’s a full-on undead revenant. In exactly the same condition they put him in the ground. He has embalming fluid in his veins, and wires holding his broken bones together. His mouth was sewn shut. But he’s not braindead, he’s fully aware, so enjoy that nightmare fuel for your near future! Additionally, people can’t seem to recognize him as being out of place; he’s walking around in his funeral suit, covered in dirt, and hardly anyone gives him a second glance. He doesn’t register to people, just a face in the crowd, just another part of Gotham, and it’s... Look, Jason’s not complaining that he’s not being arrested or having people run screaming at the sight of him. He can’t even say they’re ignoring him because people will still look up, say their greetings, whatever when he walks through a door, or grunt when they walk into him. But something about the way people brush past him, the certainty nobody will remember him after their interaction is finished, hurts.

(The only way for Jason to be remembered, to leave an impression on the people around him, is to become part of a legend once again.)

Revenants come back for a reason, and Jason’s is to kill his murderer. But he’s part of Gotham proper now, and unlike Bruce, Jason can’t leave. He tries to, he drives all the way to Arkham in a hot-wired car, but he’s still a good half mile away before the pain becomes too much and Jason’s forced to turn the car around or risk crashing when he inevitably passes out. This Jason never trains with the League of Assassins, but he doesn’t need to; no Lazarus Pit needed to fix his mind, and his undead body can take a lot more punishment than any living human could.

(I have this mental image of Jason going back to Wayne Manor, right on the edge of discomfort-not-pain outside of the city proper, and needing to spill so many identifying secrets to Alfred to get Alfred to even let him through the door. Bruce is out of the country, so Alfred calls Dick to please come help him verify their visitor’s identity. Dick has no idea who this stranger in their living room is, until he closes his eyes and focuses on the magic. Dives in deep, letting the resonance of Gotham’s soul wrap around him, and is surprised to find it so much clearer & louder than it should be this far from the city’s heart. Louder than it’s ever been since Jason---

Dick opens his eyes, and his breath catches in his throat as he finally recognizes the face staring at him with so much raw hope.)

Anyway, Bruce refuses to kill the Joker even harder when he finds out Jason is back, because he’s terrified that the moment Jason’s unfinished business is done, Jason will go back to being properly dead.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Okay, last stop: Tim! The only member of the family to be fully supernatural, non-human from the start.

Tim is a changeling. Specifically, he’s a fae who was born without the spellcasting abilities most fae have, so he was traded for a human child. Tim has no memory of the fae courts or his home mound, but he’s a smart cookie and it wasn’t hard to do the math.

Tim can’t lie. He has to keep his promises and he can’t help but keep track of debts (the kindest people in his life will give him quick, easy ways to repay them; a cool rock Tim found, or an interesting bit of information. Tim doesn’t like to hold debts over others most of the time, and will offer similar outs or just tell himself the next nice thing they do for him makes them even.)

Tim can’t cross salt lines or thresholds with horseshoes above them.

Tim can’t touch iron or silver without burning his skin.

Eating non-iodized salt makes Tim sick.

If Tim speaks someone’s full name as part of a command, they will do what he tells them to (other people don’t usually realize this, because they aren’t forced violently; their own minds usually try to find ways to justify what they’re doing.)

If someone has a piece of Tim’s body (like hair, blood, or nail-clippings) Tim’s brain goes into panic mode as quickly as if they held a knife to his throat.

Those are the obvious giveaways that point straight to fae. Tim’s inhumanity can also be found in minute details of his physicality.

Tim’s eyes glow in the dark.

The tips of Tim’s ears are pointed.

Tim has never lost a tooth (but his parents had his eye-teeth removed when he was eight.)

Tim’s nails grow in tough & black as pitch. (He’s gotten in trouble many times at school for painting them, despite the doctor’s note explaining it.)

Hidden under Tim’s hair, his scalp grows thick, curved thorns like a rosebush. (His mother sits him down in the bathroom the day before company comes over, and meticulously removes them with a pair of nail clippers. It hurts. They bleed. Tim’s learned not to squirm or show how much he hate it. It hurts worse if anyone messes with Tim’s hair afterwards, but he’s learned not to show that either.)

And, of course, there’s the biggest giveaway of all:

In all Tim’s pictures before the single trip his parents ever took him on (a whirlwind tour of Europe just before his 2nd birthday,) Tim’s eyes were hazel-brown.

They’re blue now.

(Tim tells himself his parents leave him behind and push him away because they can sense something is off about him, but that they don’t know what. He tells himself they didn’t notice when the fae stole their son away, that the real Timothy Drake would’ve grown up doted on & treasured, traveling the world with them, seeing the sights. Tim tries not to think about how Drake Industries was spiraling before they took that trip, or how it stabilized before they even made it home.)

Tim still becomes Robin, barely resisting Name-commanding his way into the role (it wouldn’t be right, it wouldn’t be honest, he needs Bruce to trust Tim if Bruce is ever going to get better.)

Gotham itself sees Tim as an interloper, but when Tim is Robin it can’t do anything about that. When Jason comes back, Tim sets off all his red-flag alarms, and all he can see is an alien parasite trying to worm its way into his family. It won’t be until Jason saves Tim from supernatural poachers who try to torture Tim’s Name out of him (fruitless in the first place, Tim doesn’t know his own Name,) that they’ll be able to move past that. Gotham can project its suspicions & paranoia through Jason, but how Jason chooses to see Tim will also affect Gotham.

(Someday, Damian will find Tim’s eye-teeth and return them to him as a birthday gift. It will be the kindest single act anyone has ever done for him, as Tim feels safe & whole for the first time since they were taken. Nevermind that they’re in a jewelry box and not Tim’s body, he has his teeth back, and nobody can take them ever again.

Tim will struggle to tell Damian that Tim can’t even begin to express how much this means to him. In the end, Tim just tells Damian, “Thank you. I owe you.”

Dangerous words, with no limit on the debt.

Damian will blink, realize what Tim’s answer really means, and scoff. “Don’t be stupid. It’s a gift. You don’t owe me anything, that’s how gifts work.”)

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - 

Basically everyone else has the same stories they do in canon, but with a little less dying. I’ve given dying so much more weight in this AU, so like, Steph doesn’t die, Damian doesn’t die, etc.

Damian does inherit Bruce’s curse/burden when Bruce is lost in time, though. Dick helps him learn to manage it, on top of everything else.

[luminouslumity]

Parts One and Two!

THE UNDERWORLD: JAY, YOU BASTARD!

Anyway, after Odysseus and his crew arrive in the Underworld, that not only does he see his fallen men—including one named ELPENOR (Ἐλπήνωρ), who'd actually died while at Kirke's after he'd fallen off the roof in a drunken state—as well as his mother, but many other famous mythological figures besides Teiresias as well; perhaps most notable among them is Agamemnon, who'd been killed by his own wife KLYTEMNESTRA (Κλυταιμνήστρα), Helen's sister and Penelope's cousin, as vengeance for the sacrifice of their daughter IPHIGENIA (Ἰφιγένεια) in exchange for a fair bit of wind (in some versions, she lives), which only happened either because Agamemnon had displeased the goddess ARTEMIS (Αρτεμις) in some way—be it by boasting he was more of a hunter than she after killing a stag or because that stag had been killed in her sacred grove—or because his own father ATREUS (Ατρέω) had failed to sacrifice a golden lamb to her after promising he would, so she cursed his son as punishment. In any case, Odysseus is horrified and says that both Helen and Klytemnestra have brought nothing but disaster, and Agamemnon then tells him not to treat Penelope too well, though he does praise her sensibilities.

As for Antikleia, I've mentioned before how she is a granddaughter of Hermes, and specifically, she is a granddaughter of Hermes through her father AUTOLYCOS (Αὐτόλυκος), who'd been a trickster in his own right, having had the power to change or make invisible whatever he stole. According to later sources, such as Suida's Sisyphus, the consequences of Autolycos' thievery eventually caught up with him when the titular king demanded his fellow trickster give him his daughter to bed as compensation for Autolycos having stolen his cattle. Odysseus was born not long after. Callimachus also tells us, Antikleia had once been a companion of Artemis herself.

And because I'm feeling particularly evil today:

‘My child! How did you come here through the darkness while you were still alive? This place is hard for living men to see. There are great rivers and dreadful gulfs, including the great Ocean which none can cross on foot; one needs a ship. Have you come wandering here, so far from Troy, with ship and crew? Have you not yet arrived in Ithaca, nor seen your wife at home?’

I answered, ‘Mother, I was forced to come to Hades to consult the prophet spirit, Theban Tiresias. I have not yet come near to Greece, nor reached my own home country. I have been lost and wretchedly unhappy since I first followed mighty Agamemnon to Troy, the land of horses, to make war upon the people there. But tell me, how was sad death brought upon you? By long illness? Or did the archer Artemis destroy you with gentle arrows? Tell me too about my father and the son I left behind. Are they still honored as the kings? Or has another taken over, saying I will not return? And tell me what my wife is thinking, and her plans. Does she stay with our son and focus on his care, or has the best of the Achaeans married her?’

My mother answered, ‘She stays firm. Her heart is strong. She is still in your house. And all her nights are passed in misery, and days in tears. But no one has usurped your throne. Telemachus still tends the whole estate unharmed and feasts in style, as lords should do, and he is always asked to council meetings. Your father stays out in the countryside. He will not come to town. He does not sleep on a real bed with blankets and fresh sheets. In winter he sleeps inside, by the fire, just lying in the ashes with the slaves; his clothes are rags. In summer and at harvest, the piles of fallen leaves are beds for him. He lies there grieving, full of sorrow, longing for your return. His old age is not easy. And that is why I met my fate and died. The goddess did not shoot me in my home, aiming with gentle arrows. Nor did sickness suck all the strength out from my limbs, with long and cruel wasting. No, it was missing you, Odysseus, my sunshine; your sharp mind, and your kind heart. That took sweet life from me.’

Then in my heart I wanted to embrace the spirit of my mother. She was dead, and I did not know how. Three times I tried, longing to touch her. But three times her ghost flew from my arms, like shadows or like dreams. Sharp pain pierced deeper in me as I cried, ‘No, Mother! Why do you not stay for me, and let me hold you, even here in Hades? Let us wrap loving arms around each other and find a frigid comfort in shared tears! But is this really you? Or has the Queen sent me a phantom, to increase my grief?’

She answered, ‘Oh, my child! You are the most unlucky man alive. Persephone is not deceiving you. This is the rule for mortals when we die. Our muscles cease to hold the flesh and skeleton together; as soon as life departs from our white bones, the force of blazing fire destroys the corpse. The spirit flies away and soon is gone, just like a dream. Now hurry to the light; remember all these things, so you may tell your wife in times to come.’

NO LONGER YOU: According to one myth, Teiresias of Thebes came across two snakes in the middle of mating one day and hit them both with a rod. As a result, he was changed into a woman, until she saw the same pair of snakes again years later and was then changed back into a man. Zeus and Hera then asked him which gender enjoyed intercourse more, with Zeus favoring women and Hera men; when Teiresias said that women enjoyed it more, Hera blinded him and Zeus then gave him the power of prophecy afterwards.

Teiresias would go on to become a rather notable figure in myth, but to Odysseus specifically, the prophecy is described thusly:

‘Odysseus, you think of going home as honey-sweet, but gods will make it bitter. I think Poseidon will not cease to feel incensed because you blinded his dear son. You have to suffer, but you can get home, if you control your urges and your men. Turn from the purple depths and sail your ship towards the island of Thrinacia; there you will find grazing cows and fine fat sheep, belonging to the god who sees and hears all things—the Sun God. If you leave them be, keeping your mind fixed on your journey home, you may still get to Ithaca, despite great losses. But if you hurt those cows, I see disaster for your ship and for your men. If you yourself escape, you will come home late and exhausted, in a stranger’s boat, having destroyed your men. And you will find invaders eating your supplies at home, courting your wife with gifts. Then you will match the suitors’ violence and kill them all, inside your halls, through tricks or in the open, with sharp bronze weapons. When those men are dead, you have to go away and take an oar to people with no knowledge of the sea, who do not salt their food. They never saw a ship’s red prow, nor oars, the wings of boats. I prophesy the signs of things to come. When you meet somebody, a traveler, who calls the thing you carry on your back a winnowing fan, then fix that oar in earth and make fine sacrifices to Poseidon—a bull and stud-boar. Then you will go home and offer holy hecatombs to all the deathless gods who live in heaven, each in order. Gentle death will come to you, far from the sea, of comfortable old age, your people flourishing. So it will be.’

MONSTER: I really wanted to focus on this part here:

Does a soldier use a wooden horse to kill sleeping Trojans cause he is vile? Or does he throw away his remorse and save more lives with guile?

I went over the Trojan War pretty briefly in the first post of this series, but as for the horse specifically, though Odysseus is credited as the architect, the idea—according to Dictys Cretensis—came to him from the captured Prince HELENOS (Ἕλενος) of Troy, who'd been a seer like his twin sister KASSANDRA (Κασσάνδρα). From what we currently have available of The Sack of Troy:

The Greeks then sailed in from Tenedos, and those in the wooden horse came out and fell upon their enemies, killing many and storming the city. Neoptolemus kills Priam who had fled to the altar of Zeus Herceius; Menelaus finds Helen and takes her to the ships, after killing Deiphobus; and Aias [Ajax the Younger] the son of Ileus, while trying to drag Cassandra away by force, tears away with her the image of Athena. At this the Greeks are so enraged that they determine to stone Aias, who only escapes from the danger threatening him by taking refuge at the altar of Athena. The Greeks, after burning the city, sacrifice Polyxena at the tomb of Achilles: Odysseus murders Astyanax; Neoptolemus takes Andromache as his prize, and the remaining spoils are divided. Demophon and Acamas find Aethra and take her with them. Lastly the Greeks sail away and Athena plans to destroy them on the high seas.

Afterwards, it's said that only Nestor and Diomedes returned home straightaway, but Menelaos and Helen get stranded in Egypt for years after a storm blows them off course and destroys most of their ships, Ajax the Lesser gets thrown against rocks after also being caught in a storm while accompanying Agamemnon, who gets killed immediately after returning home even despite being warned by Akhilleus, some Greeks make it to the city of Colophon, and Neoptolemus is instructed by his grandmother THETIS (Θετις) to return home, during which he even ends up reuniting with Odysseus for a brief time.

[quodekash]

All The Times They Haven't Kissed - Soundwin edition! - FINAL UPDATED VERSION 

(keep in mind this is subjective, it's just parts of the show where i reckon they couldve plausibly kissed but couldnt/didnt due to unfortunate circumstances)

(and as time goes on those "unfortunate circumstances" are more and more because they just. didnt kiss.)

before i begin, i just wanna point out that in episode 4, win says to sound "i want to see if your skills are as good as your mouth" and I just--

Episode 5: Sound literally singing a line of a love song directly at Win

Episode 6: fighting part 1 (music club)

Episode 6: fighting part 2 (across the student council table)

Episode 6: badminton: nighttime edition

Episode 6: MEDAL KISS

Episode 7: tied up part 1

Episode 7: tied up part 2

Episode 7: tied up part 3 (look, they had a lot of opportunity while they were tied up)

Episode 8: MOTORBIKE SCENE

when Tinn and Gun left the room in the middle of the night (they would've been sleeping side-by-side once they were gone) (this scene doesn't technically exist so i can't technically count it but I'm allowed to imagine so I'm counting it)

Episode 8: THE WATER SCENE??

Episode 9: THE WATER SCENE??????

Episode 9: "wait to hear it" (SOUND THERE WAS NO NEED TO STEP THAT CLOSE TO HIM, ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL US???)

Episode 9: UMBRELLA SCENE

stepping closer, both hands on Win's heart, staring into the other's soul

Episode 9: THE SHIRT GRAB #1

Episode 9: THE SHIRT GRAB #2 (HJJHKFJHJJHFFK)

Episode 11: after the hug (they’re liTERALLY BOYFRIENDS AND WE WEREN’T TOLD ABOUT IT, SURELY THEY CAN KISS NOW) 

Episode 11: after the fight when they’re sitting on the rock 

Episode 11: we could’ve gotten an after dinner scene of them strolling along on the beach in the dark and they kiss or something but no they had to give us tinngun instead (and tinngun diDNT EVEN KISS)

Episode 12: WIN, YOU COULD'VE MADE YOUR "PUMPKIN" (his words not mine btw pumpkin is a literal canonical pet name for sound and its killing me) EVEN MORE FLUSTERED BY KISSING HIM (even if it was just a little cheek kiss I DONT CARE JUST DO IT PLEASE)

Episode 12: "what a f**king coward. i can't believe i used to respect him." you should disrespect him even more by kiSSING A MAN (win) ON THE MOUTH!! SCARE AWAY THE HOMOPHOBIA! (for all intents and purposes, this is a joke)

Episode 12: they almost certainly could've kissed at some point during that final chinzhilla scene. just to keep us on our toes, y'know?

So we've got 23 in total (still nowhere near tinngun but the number is still way too big), and the winner is still episode 9, with 6 Times They Didn't Kiss

now time for...

All The Times They Have Kissed

Episode 12: CHEEK KISS #1 (if you have questions as to why a cheek kiss has made it here, ill explain at the end)

Episode 12: CHEEK KISS #1

Episode 12: WHAT THE FLIP I KNOW I KEPT ASKING FOR IT BUT I DIDNT KNOW THEY'D ACTUALLY DO IT I WOULD'VE BEEN CONTENT WITH JUST THE CHEEK KISSING BUT NO THEY HAD TO GO ABOVE AND BEYOND AAAAAAAAAAAA

Episode 12: AND THEY WENT DOUBLEY ABOVE AND BEYOND AND FULLY KISSED TWICE

and sound's little teasing kisses afterwards? my heart🥹🥹

(so i know for tinngun i counted cheek kisses and stuff as not actually kissing, but with those ones tinngun could've feasibly mouth-kissed but they didn't. here, soundwin are in front of an audience, so obviously they wouldn't mouth-kiss, but cheek kissing is still a lot, AND it's the furthest that soundwin have gone. so that's why i think the soundwin cheek kisses should go in the times they actually kissed section, reminder that this is all very subjective)

(all the times other ships in the show haven’t kissed: tinngun and tiwpor)

[frigidsilver]

--CHAPTER 2--

Blotted Clouds

A month or so had passed since Karnage offered a spot on his crew to the bat named Vincent Lunas. Since then, his new recruit has been proving to be more than just a witty talker. Quickly finding a place among the mechanics and engineers of the crew repairing the engines, keeping the canons maintained, and the occasional blackout he's tasked with fixing.

They all had been doing the occasional morning routines. All filed into the mess hall sluggishly and drowsily. Grabbing their breakfast from the chef and finding their seats to converse and eat. Karnage sat in his reserved seat at the end of the hall by the windows that looked over the clear morning sky.

Vincent and the other mechanics made their way in a few minutes later. Recently just arriving from the supply run they were sent to retrieve earlier that morning. Don had waived Vincent to his table. The bat grabbed a tray with some fruits then pulled a chair aside Don.

"Good morning, my little tinker. How is my lovely ship running so far?"

"Everything is running swimmingly, Captain. Ratchet, Jock and myself picked up the ship's weekly supplies from the port, along with your requested order."

He placed a to-go cup of coffee on the table in front of his captain. In which Don reached over to grab, washing down his meal. A yawn escaped his mouth with his hand groggily pushing it back in.

"I maybe known as the creature of the night among the crew. But it seems to me that coffee is the only thing keep you up.

"Don't think you are the funny comedian this morning. I was not the one singing outside the ship late at night. If I knew any better, you are enjoying your night shifts TOO much."

Vincent gave a sheepish grin, not even fighting the accusations.

"Did you stay up all night listening to my songs? Forgive me, I'll bring it down a few octaves. Although, I'm touched to know you let me get away with it so long without any ill comments."

"I'm not complaining, Vincent. I am just making sure you don't lose your edge.

I would hate to throw you off my ship for not getting the required amount of sleep."

"Don and Vincent gave each other a grin. Enjoying the banter they share. It's been so long since Don Karnage had someone to give a good back and forth without fumbling on their words. He watched the bat pull out a crumpled newspaper. He barely had unfolded it without a word read when Don pulled the paper down with a finger.

"Are you not going to share this morning's news? I need to keep my knowledge sharp."

Don listened to the willing reader whisk through the headlines briefly. Leisurely rocking back and forth in his chair with Vincent comfortably putting a leg on a knee.

"Abel Klaus faces charges for stolen inventions. Wonderful news...rivaling news anchor, DNN. Faces backlash after bold accusations torwards the king...A-

His eyes stopped to take a moment to read the next headline. Immediately running back and forth through the wrinkled papers to find the full article. Reading the header with his best news reporter voice.

"I think this will pique your interest:

Ace pilot, Baloo Von Bruinwald. Has been reported missing for three days."

Don Karnage almost spat out his Cappuccino after hearing that. Now sitting up straight like a student being called by their teacher. He snatched the papers from the bat's hands. who raised his hand up passively letting his eager captain finish the article with great focus.

"His employer, Rebecca Cunningham of Higher for Hire. Claims he was making a delivery with his navigator, Kit Cloudkicker, southeast of Wasteland and never came back. Also stating that, "He was not at any of the usual places he goes to slack off."

"Huh, Harsh lady. Must be fun swiping her cargo every so often. Well, attempting to that is."

"Oh, but it is much fun. But this is a surprise, even to myself. Rebecca knows that Bear has gotten himself into worse situations and comes back on time for the paycheck. I struck with curiosity on the reasoning for her concern."

Pushing himself out of his chair and placing his hands on the table. Staring off into the wall, visualizing his new morning plans come together. With his nemesis taking a surprise vacation, this left a wonderful opportunity for some excitement.

"With the so-called Ace pilot missing. This gives Don Karnage and his vicious band of pirates a perfect chance to raid the wonderful city of Cape Suzette once again, Yes-no?"

Don Karnage cut breakfast short and put his crew straight to work. Setting the Iron Vulture's course to the city of Cape Suzette.

A wonderful city with towering buildings that even planes have their own designated flight paths through the various structures. Along with its equally as tall cliffs that protected the city from threats like Karnage and his crew. With only a small chasm that lead in and out. Armed with massive cannons and guns that rivaled the ships.

The air pirates had successfully raided Cape Suzette only once. But that was episodes ago and foiled by the efforts of Baloo and the young traitor, Kit.

Kit...

The boy's name rang through Karnage's head as he saw the bright art deco city coming up into view. It was the same as the last time he visited.

His wandering mind drifted his gaze skyward, to be met with a dark storm brewing. Quickly falling over the ship and soon the city.

"Aha, now THIS will add to the dramatic entrance. We shall hide among the storm and catch them by surprise. Nothing like a little bit of lighting and-"

In response to Don Karnage's proclamation. An explosive boom shook the ship. Frantically scanning to see if the cliff cannons had shot at them. To his relief, the guns remained to stay idol. But there was no time to take chances. Karnage reached for the intercom system and held it to his face.

"RATCHET, what was that? Did the ship go boom? If not, what did?"

Moments of static later, the raspy voice of the head engineer, Ratchet spoke through the com.

"No captain, must be the storm outside. Pretty big one to me."

"Keep an eye on my contraptions, my good man. We dont want to be looking like fools in front of our victims, yes, no?

The captain turned his attention back to the storm above. Taking accout of the looming clouds that gradually built over the city and the airship.

Clustered together tight that none of the morning light pierced through. Leaving the sky a dark violent purple that swirled around. Rain began to fall around the ship. Hitting the hull with hard thuds like small rocks. Just by hearing it, one would assume it would be hail.

Except something was strangely wrong with this rain.

It was not clear, but shared the same violent purple as the clouds it came from. Thick and slimy as it clung to the ship's hull.

Crew mates crowded around the ports with Don like moths to a lamp. Eyes glued to the goop slowly piling up together.

Their curiosity quickly turned to concern as the growing piles started to become animated. Climbing on top of each other to make disfigured limbs, gaping mouths, and parting way for soulless, green eyes that burned into the inhabitants of the ship.

It was no rain,

It was ink.

The pirates backed up from the windows as the monsters grew in number. A slow trudge turned into a mad dash to the windows. One of the pirates fled from the windows in a high pitch voice filled with fear.

"SPATTERS!"

All moved away from the windows as the Spatters reached the windows. Lurching what would be assumed to be their heads back and spitting a vile green acid that burned through the window and hull. Putting their unnerving, buring stares to shame.

"THAT IS IMPOSSIBLE! The king and the rodent finished the big one off, did they not!?"

At the very back of the ship, the three engineers ran maintenance checks on the engines, unaware of the assault at the front of the ship. Until Vincent's ears perked over noises that were not familiar.

"Wait a minute..."

Ratchet and Jock turned from their duties torwards Vincent, who stood completely still. Trying to understand what this dingbat was on about.

"It's probably all the lightning outside that's putting your hearing out of whack."

The bat didn't respond if he was stuck in the 19th century, concentrating on the numerous sounds of the ship. He heard the shrill shouts of the crew about a problem soon to be discovered, Karnage's muffled voice howled unintelligible commands, the sounds of the "rain" pounding against the metal exterior, then numerous clangs echoing from deep in the ship that gradually became louder.

The other two pirates looked around now, understanding one of Vincent's concerns. Jock neared one of the pipes, squinting through his dark glasses to see a dark liquid dripping from the cracks of the machine.

"THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE PIPES!"

Not even a moment to process the info was given as the machines groaned in discomfort. Billowing a thick smoke trying to rid the spatters as one tries to rid off an infection. The three darted back and forth between the different contraptions. Twisting values, tightening pipes, and even resorting to primitive pounding on the metal. Anything to try to keep the system stable. Vincent swooped over to the radio to warn the captain of this issue.

"Karnage, the machines down here are malfunctioning. At this rate, we're not sure how long we can keep them together."

But it was no use. The line remained to be the only silent thing in that room.

A pipe broke off the wall and fell to the floor with a loud clang. The three all looked at the fallen pipe spew a black liquid. Slowly forming one of the hundreds of shipwrecking culprits. Its eyes pierced through the smoke and launched itself at the startled pirates.

The green acid was chucked at poor Jock like vomit. Yelling in agony as it made contact with his arm. Leaving it looking like a melted candle as his striped shirt and his charcoal fur melted together and dripped onto the floor. Vincent whipped one of his wings at the spatter and shielded Jock with his other arms. In the process, the quick-thinking Ratchet released the pressure in the pipes, causing them to spray out steam. Putting a barrier between the threat and them.

The machines groans escalated to high-pitched screams as they could no longer stay together. Instincts told them to heed that warning and dropped everything. They fled up the stairs helping Jock out the engine room, slamming the door shut behind them just in the nick of time.

The three leaned on the door with their weight, attempting to give their bodies a moments rest. Sweat dampening their collars and fur. Not even a moment later;

BOOM

The whole ship shook from the blast. Heat poured out from the door with a fiery glow quickly following. They all fearfully scampering away from the explosion, Jock ran alongside Vincent while he squeezed his injured arm with ink leaking through his fingers.

"WE NEED TO GET YOU OUT OF HERE, NOW! YOURE LOOSING TOO MUCH INK!"

"THERE'S NO TIME FOR THAT!

YOU NEED TO GET TO THE CAPTAIN AND TELL HIM TO HOLD THE SHIP STEADY SO WE CAN BREACH THE WALL. YOURE THE FASTEST OUT OF US, WE'LL TRY AND KEEP THE LAST ENGINE GOING UNTIL THEN."

Jock and Ratchet took a hard right to the remaining engine. Leaving Vincent alone to pick up speed to barrel down the hallway. Hallway after hallway, Vincent navigated through the labyrinth of corridors and catwalks to reach the hangar. Having his suspicions to be true. The walls of the hangar were thinned through, distorted chunks of metal clinging to what remained. Leaving gaping holes for the spatters to continue their brainless hunt. Crewmates alike defended against the intruders with all they had. Climbing up to the catwalks to take refuge from the sludge zombies that clawed at the walls.

Vincent kicked the door of the bridge open. Seeing the debonair captain wrestling the helm for control over the Iron Vulture and warding off a spatter. He swatted it away with his wing near the hole it emerged from. Kicking it right back out to plunge into the sea below. Short breathed, he reported to Karnage;

"We just lost an engine! Jock and Ratchet are doing all they can to keep the last one together. The spatters got inside the system, I don't know how."

"DO YOU THINK I AM STUPID IN THE HEAD? OF COURSE I CAN TELL IT WENT BOOM. MY SHIP USUALLY DOES NOT FLY LIKE A-"

Karnage's emotions flipped from irritation to dread. If all the horrors that unfolded around him finally caught up to him. Whipping his body toward the windows with eyes wide open.

"The cannons, RADIO THE CAPE SUZZETE AIR CONTROL RIGHT NOW!"

He quickly took his captain's orders into action and fumbled with the radio's dial to the air control's frequency.

"This is the Iron Vulture to air control. We request an emergency landing in your city's harbors. Spatters are ravaging our ship and took out one of our engines. SO PLEASE REGROW THOSE STOLEN HEARTS OF YOURS AND LET US THOUGH!

.....HELLO?"

The line stayed quiet, with the only thing that could be heard being crackling static. As did the canons that lined on top of the wall. Vincent tapped his foot anxiously waiting for their response. Before letting out an irritated sigh before tossing the mic aside.

"No one bothers to pick up the radio anymore, do they? Or even do their jobs for that matter..."

"We are AIR PIRATES, Vincent! We do not have to abide by ANY of their silly rules. If they are not going to shoot; We go in."

The Iron Vulture unsteadily made it pass the wall. As they did, they found their reason for the lack of security. It was not only the air pirates that were being attacked.

So was all of Cape Suzette.

The ink rain caked the buildings and canons with creatures of all shapes and variety that formed from the puddles. All filled with the same lime green acid.

Thinner

The same substance that ate away at the Iron Vulture, the buildings of Cape Suzette. The same liquid that spilled into their world years ago. Causing the Great Thinner Disaster, that ruined Wasteland. Along with marking the arrival of the monster that came with it, The Blot. A massive demon forged of ink that plagued the world of the forgotten with its endless army of blotlings. Tearing this world apart with the goal to escape and lay ruin the worlds they all once knew.

Vincent only had heard stories of the disaster and the monsters of dark ink from the Gremlins back in Salom during lunch breaks. But nothing could've prepared him for the destructive capabilities of these things.

He was brought back to his senses when tossed to the side by the abrupt jolt of the ship. The ship's helm spun around clockwork.

"THESE IDIOTS ARE TURNING MY BEAUTIFUL SHIP INTO SCRAPS OF METAL!"

Karnage whined as the ship veered close to the wall. Scraping some of the spatters off the ship. Leaving their remains as graffiti on the rocky canvas. Regaining their balance, the two of them held their tongues as the mutilated ship crept out of the cliff, into the harbor.

Despite the small victory, another blast came from behind them. As the last engine finally succumbed to its demise. Vincent turned back to the explosion, concerned for the other mechanics. The airship lost its momentum, rapidly starting it's decent.

"I TOLD YOU IDIOTS TO KEEP AN EYE ON MY SHIP!"

That was uncalled for, I am sorry."

Turning on the intercom one last time, he spoke to his crew rapidly.

"Everyone to the planes, it's time to make a tactical retreat. Hurry now, scatter, go, VAMOOSE! Or I throw you off myself."

The fighter planes one by one sputtered to life down in the hangar. The captain pulled a long lever in the bridge that opened the beak of the ship to the violent storm outside. Sounds of propellers disappeared as Lunas made sure everyone was accounted for from the bridge window. To Vincents relief Jock and Ratchet, emerging from the back of the ship with a layer of ash dusted on their clothes. Everyone had safely made it to a plane and out of the ship.

Except one.

Don stood at the controls stubbornly fighting the wheel. Vincent held onto the doorway for support, calling out to him over the winds.

"Karnage, everyone is off the ship. We need to leave, now"

"I will NOT let these slimey type foes be the last on Don Karnage! I REFUSE to let my ship fall without its glorious captain!"

"The ship will be fine, we can repair it or get a new one. What won't be fine is you getting mutilated like the ship and the pests. Who's going to order around the air pirates? Do you really want Dumptruck to come out of retirement and be captain again after last time?"

Don gripped the wheel tightly trying to stay strong for the vulture, his Iron Vulture. As the towering buildings started to fall around him, the reality started to set in.

His crew needed Don Karnage. How would they ever function without him? Who would lead their revenge on the blotlings? Who was even worthy of carrying his title if he perished?

Reluctantly, he took a deep breath while his grip loosened off of the helm. Backing away with defeat etched on his face, switching on the auto pilot. Vincent raised a hand trying to find the words to attempt comforting Don. But only watched him rush out of the bridge, in which he closely tailed behind. The clanking of their boots pounding on the metal drowned out by the numerous explosions from inside the ship.

The hangar was left empty with only the sounds of howling winds pouring through and a choir of spatters gurgling down below. Don gritted his teeth furiously and rushed down the stairs. Cutlass in hand, he launched torwards the perpetrators that ruined his ship.

"They'll pay for what they've done!"

A vicious swipe of his sword made contact with one of the spatters cutting right through the middle. Only for the blades cuts to be covered again by the dripping ooze. Leaving no trace of Don's fury.

Vincent made his own attempt and let out two shots from his pistols. Unfortunately, met with the same outcome like Karnage. The bullets went straight through and bounced off the metallic interior.

Frustration grew as time did not. Looking over the situation, he hatched up a plan. Running to the wall of the hangar and closed the beak of the ship. The bat heard the creaking of the ship's beak close shut and saw Don was still inside. He dived to him and started shaking him by his shoulders in panic.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING? HOW ARE YOU GETTING OUT WITH YOUR PLANE?"

"If I leave that beak open when we crash, we would be drinking sea water like little fishies. I want my beloved Vulture to be intact. Not to end up like the pathetic little shipwrecks made by primitive sea pirates.

I will make my retreat out the bomb bay doors. If we are truly lucky, we will pull the rug from underneath them spatters in the process. I rely on you to signal me when you open the doors. So if anything goes in the south direction; I WILL WEAR YOUR WINGS LIKE A GOTHIC CAPE!"

Vincent gave a speechless confirmation with a blank face. Eyes following the wolf luring the spatters to his plane. Still attempting to process the information with his wings tucked closer to his back defensively.

The familiar sounds of propellers filled the ship once again. Don had maneuvered his plane over the bomb bay doors and awaited Vincent's signal. Who stood by the button like a ride operator ready to plunge him out of the ship. He tore off the red bandana draped around his neck. Swinging it in the air like a flag with a high pitch whistle following right after. With a quick reaction from Don pushing on the throttle full force.

Not a moment later, the doors flung open underneath, dropping the spatters and plane into the air. All sounds faded away into the winds.

A feeling Don Karnage knew all too well. He was made to be apart of the skies. To soar through the clouds and plunder whoever he pleased. He pursuited the most skilled fliers through mountains and caves. This was no challenge for the prince of pirates. This was nothing more than an everyday adventure the writers put him through.

Pulling the throttle close to his chest as he rapidly approached the water. Meters turned to feet, city and harbor blurring together. The plane only grazed the slightest amount of water as it flew over by inches. Don's confidence remained unwaivered, circling around the Iron Vulture.

Vincent punched the button again sliding the doors back together. He rushed to one of the spatter-made holes and saw the captain's plane nimbly dodging the falling ink.

"That's the Don Karnage for you."

The bat whispered to himself tying his bandana back across his neck. Then made his own escape out of the ship. Flapping upwards to intercept Karnage's plane. He grappled onto one of the wings and tried to catch his shaky breath.

The captain didn't acknowledge Vincent at first. Only watched solemnly as the Iron Vulture splashed into the water below. Large tidal waves pulsating throughout the harbor. Karnage's face melted to bittersweet relief, seeing his ship float like a toy bot in a bathtub. A sigh of relief later, he spoke over the propeller.

"Excellent work, Vincent. Your precision managed to almost come close to rivaling my own talent."

"The only thing you're rivaling is the king's luck. Though your skills are impressive, not gonna deny it."

Feelings of mutual respect amongst captain and mechanic only clouded the internal feeling of despair for the crashed airship.

"We will come back for my ship. For now, we shall locate Rebecca Cunningham. I fear there's a connection to those failed attempts of art projects and Baloo's disappearance. "

The falling ink slowed to a stop, leaving the sounds of thunder and wailing winds behind. The tires of the plane made contact with the pavement of a cleared road close to the docks.

Vincent and Don stepped off into the wet street with a thud. Turning to see an upclose view of the damage the storm had brought to the unfortunate city.

The once vibrant buildings that proudly stood tall in the sky now bent into warped and twisted versions of their former glory. Leaving towers wilted and chunks of buildings missing. The thinner had burned through the colorful paint that coated the walls. Digging dull, lifeless dents in their structures. Most places in Wasteland had become husks of what they once were since the thinner disaster. But to see the effects in a matter of minutes showed the true destructive nature of the acid that plagued their world.

Drenched in sweat with pulses still pounding on the falling airship. They vigilantly walked down the pier cautiously, on edge with every creak of each dingy plank of wood.

"It's lucky that you and the vulture had stayed so strong after all these years."

Vincent's voice cut through the thick silence in attempt to distract Don's mind. Who stared ahead blankly like a lost child. Only thinking about all he'd lost all in one morning. His greatest enemy, his ship, and now the city he was supposed to conquer.

After all he was THE air pirate. He was supposed to be plundering things away. Not the other way around.

"We were airborne most of the time. We never were too close to the area where that pollution resided. Or where that...thing launched its last attack. Thanks to my excellent skills of navigation and planning, of course."

His snapped back to his self-assured persona. Remembering the captain he supposed to be.

A few steps later of weary walking, they arrived at their location at the far end of the docks.

Higher for Hire's headquarters resided in a small office with a storehouse and watchtower attached to it. Charming little place made of wood and scrap metal. Which didn't look as charming as it usually did as most of the city didn't at the moment. Holes littered the surfaces of the building and docks. With the biggest hole being the port where Baloo's cargo plane, The Seaduck, usually was found lazily rocking in the water. Alike to its pilot in his hammock right beside it.

They knocked at the office door with no response. They banged louder on the wooden door. Not a sound came from within. It remained pitch black. Not even a moment later, Karnage marched around to the side of the building over to a window. He stuck his cutlass through the gap. Scraping back and forth to unlock the window.

"You really can't be patient, can you? We can just get in though the multiple holes in the walls the blot gracefully left for us."

"I've stolen an idol and the keys to the seaduck plane before though this certain window. This is my own personal door in."

A loud pop later, the old window slid open. A cold breeze

"It is not my fault they don't ever fix this little issue."

Don's announcing footsteps echoed through the office floor. Strewn with missing fliers and numerous undelivered cargo that towered to the ceiling. A mug was left abandoned on the desktop with white steam still dancing above it. The captain took note of this and cleared his throat. Walking around while looking for the owner loudly calling out to her.

"Allo, Allo Rebecca Cunningham. It is I, the consulting captain, Don Kar-"

A turn of a corner unveiled a loaded flare gun pointed directly at Don. Putting his parade around the room came to a sharp halt. Hands up by his face in response with his thick brows raised. Vincent quickly armed himself with his pistols and pointed it directly at the holder. A stern yet shaky voice emerged from the dark corner.

"What do you want, Karnage?"

The gun pushed the captain to the center of the room. Pulling out the person holding it into the dim light. Vincent had his fingers on the triggers ready for any sudden movements.

An average sized woman stood composed at the pirates. She dressed in a pink jacket wrapped over a white turtleneck with muted purple slacks. Her eyes dead locked with this all too familiar intruder with stands of hair falling from her usually upkept French twist.

"Rebecca, I come on business inquiring about Baloo."

Her grip tightened on the flare gun. Raising both her voice and her aim towards his face.

"Who's to say you don't have him in your grasps already? If he's not with you; Then why are you in my office?

Getting impatient waiting to loot our cargo from the seaduck?"

"I assumed my powerful presence would act as a magnet to his metal exterior. Attracting him back to save his wonderful Cape Suzette from the likes of my glorious self. Though now, these pests overstaged me and ruined my onslaught.

May we please talk like civilized type of persons?"

She cautiously lowered her weapon with eyes still on the pirates. Vincent meeting her with the same cold gaze, placing his own pistols away back into his coat reluctantly. A moment later, Rebecca lead them to her desk. Dropping herself into her chair with a soft thud, exasperated. Loose papers gently floated in the air to the floor boards.

"First I lose my pilot and navigator, then the Blot comes back for another serving, and now I have air pirates in my office. I really can't catch a break, can I?"

"Unfortunately no my capitalist compatriot.

You could say your life has been in a "talespin" ever since we've been forgotten, Yes, no?

Hah, I make a joke."

He laughed at his own remark. The other two remained silent as they looked at him. Rebecca pulled at the strands of her brunette hair. Words filtering through her frustrated teeth.

"Give me a good reason why I shouldn't walk straight through the thinner and spatters to get the police?"

"As if the police are even in a solid unit at this point. Didn't even bother to shoot us or the blotlings out of the sky."

The bat chipped in the snarky remark from across the room. Peeking into open cargo boxes with curiosity. Mrs. Cunningham didn't even bother with turning her head to the bat and kept her gaze on Karnage.

"I'm sorry, Karnage. But I can't keep track of all your goons. Who is this?"

"This is Vincent Lunas. Relatively new to my honorable band of air pirates."

Karnage dragged Vincent away from his rummaging, displaying the mechanic as a collector presents his latest finds. An unimpressed Rebecca slumps in her chair, looking up at the two.

"Honorable is a loose term you use. All you do is steal and be a thorn at my side ever since the pilot episode."

"It's plunder miss-analysis-of-terms. You can't blame for loving my job and loving the riches you carry."

"King Oswald hasn't made any ill complaints about us. We stay in our air territory, and we have no quarrel."

The bat looked down onto Rebecca. Visibly irritated with how belittling this strewed businesswoman was towards him. Something he wasn't going to let by. His voice dropped low and sharp along with his brow.

"Since we're on the topic of "honorable. " Weren't you the one who endorsed those robot pilots who put dozens out of the job so you could get a good payment? If it wasn't for Karnage sabotaging that flight. Your little operation would've been 6 feet under before you even got dragged down here with the rest of us."

Vincent continued to jab at her track records with petty intent. Wings risen over his head, standing his ground. Rebecca pushed herself out of the chair to confront him. Don Karnage wedged himself between the two, voicing his own frustration.

"We are here to make a deal, not to cause more problems than there needs to be. It has been a long day though it is still is young.

A sharp exhale later, Don leaned on the desk with his hands together. Speaking in his charismatic voice that Rebecca had heard one too many times.

"You see, while you two were squabbling like little children. Don Karnage put some pieces together to this mystery puzzle. Who was the client who hired your services?"

"I'm not going to give out private information out like candy. I have a reputation to uphold and rules for my company."

"How about this; we help you find Baloo and Kit Cloudkicker and possibly help with this mess you and the citizens of Cape Suzette are in. If we are feeling so generous."

"...What's the catch?"

A foxy grin curled his lips over his sharp teeth. His voice spelled out persuasive words to Mrs. Cunningham interests and his own.

"You will put in a good word to the Cape Suzette officials to lift the ban of me and my crew in your city.

Think about it this way; I would not have to force my way into Cape Suzette and raid it if I was simply let in. Think of all the problems we can solve with this simple agreement, Mrs. Cunningham.

Not to mention the wonderful seafood dinners and loot we can easily take."

The last part was whispered underneath his breath, so only where Vincent could hear. Who smothered his visible anger with logic. Being overruled by the potential of his captain's clever negotiation. Fixing his demeanor to be more respectful and folded his wings behind his back.

"Alright, Karnage. I'll budge for now. As much as i don't want to be seen with you filthy pirates. I'm going with you to make sure you don't cause any problems with the info I gave you AND to make sure those two aren't making a fool of me.

"You have my word on my honor as an air pirate. We shall be on our bestest behaviors. isn't that right, Vincent?"

He spoke in a noble tone giving a theatrical bow to exemplify his promise. Vincent mimicking his captain's action right after with watered down enthusiasm.

Rebecca rose from her chair marching to a filing cabinet on the wall. Flipping through the contents inside. Pulling out a barely used file and held it in her hands.

"The last client those two flew for was for Khan Industries, under Shere Khan himself."

——————————————————————

(When this is posted, The Epic Mickey Rebrushed trailer had been released the same day. MY FIXATION MANEFESTED THE REMAKE)

Chap 1, Chap 2, Chap 3

[da-gamingojichan]

Dick/Pussy Headcanons dropping when?

i wont lie guys i dont really know the variety of how genitalia can be different very well..... the most ive learned is when i went online and saw someone made a caard about their headcanons for the matusno brothers which included very detailed descriptions of each of their dicks (how i learned penises irl can have different amounts of curve) and their mental illness hcs (how i learned narcassism counts as a mental illness) and a bunch of other shit. but i have a little bit of headcanon for the characters i think a lot about

- germany has a penis that leans on the larger side and its terrible because he is never using it. its kinda ugly idk how because all genitals are ugly but he somehow has an ugly penis compared to other penises because germany is meant to be ugly to his core. it also turns super red like uncomfortably red (bright cherry red iphone 3) because i think he gets red really easily since hes freakishly pale. also his penis is abnormally sensitive but he doesnt know this because the only person to touch it is italy and italy has sex skills gifted by the lord so hes blessed because if anyone else gave him a handjob or blowie hed be like OWWW IT HURTS STAWP STAWP TOO HARD!!!!!

- italy has the most amazing awesomesauce pussy fucking ever. his pussy and strap on skills induce the same level of peace and prosperity as the shit those monks that live on the tops of mountains are aiming for. he literally has a talent thats gifted by god and it is in fact RIGHTEOUS of him to be banging bitches left and right because he needs to share his divine gift to the world. and thats why its fucking hilarious that hes wasting all this raw talent and perfect sex on hetalia "premature ejaculation king" germany. the mf that literally cant recieve a blow job without overstim because he always finishes before his penis makes contact with le mouf. germany would literally like anything from italy and italy is the sex god thats been cutrently saving our world from the nymphojinn. italy is the real life huniepop protagonist and hes retired to never have sex ever because his boyfriend is fucking scared and when he does its over with in 2 minutes.

- japan has a small penis. japanese men grower not show-er! i believe that japan wants to top but he never will because he cant be deadass enough to assert himself and say he wants to. also because if he tops the ship name has to have jap in it (IM JAPANESE I CAN SAY THE SLUR) and i think thats awesome and hilarious but people dont like that so hes banned from semeing forever because its racist. but i believe in his head he is a total kinky otaku sex freak who wants to seme so bad and use a jillion million sex toys you didnt even know could exist.

- prussia also has a slightly below average penis and hes very very very very very embarassed about it he will never admit its small he goes NO ITS GREAT AND MIGHTY OKAY. he calls his dick his "beautiful gleaming white saber of justice" sometimes and everybody fucking hates it. also its really sensitive so hes really picky about head and it pisses romano off because romano can tell when hes faking being comfortable (but it also would piss him off if prussia said his head wasnt good enough) and because of that he gives prussia head everytime they bang and its painful and prussia dreads it everytime and is like hahaha you dont have to if you dont want to... and romanos like "SHUT the fuck up and lay down you ungrateful piece of shit" but slowly he actually gets really fucking good and prussia likes it because hes refined his craft but now because prussia likes it romano stops and only gives head when prussia begs and pleads because giving head is disgusting.

- romano has a pretty good penis like idk what makes a penis pretty good. but its pretty good trust me on this guys its nothin to scoff at the ladies would love it if romano got any ladies (never ever). its regarded as a handsome penis i think like wow thats pretty good! its pretty average sized, maybe on the smaller end of the spectrum and that makes romano mad and incredibly insecure even though it doesnt really matter since romano is actually just a grower not a show-er. but yeah its good.

- benson regular show has a 6/10 gumhole.

[aurora-313]

If you wanted to do it: for the Give me a Character thing: gonna pick the obvious, Kaien, and also Ukitake if you want more than one.

Kaien

How I feel about this character: I theorize he's the Maes Hughes of Bleach. He's kind, charismatic, dedicated to his family to the umpteenth degree, freely offers advice and support to others when they need it. And I think he somehow discovered the Big Bag's plans but was murdered/'killed in action' before he could do anything about it (Killing his wife then destroying his zanpakutou so the Hollow could corrupt him? And if we consider Metastacia was Aizen's creation, that felt targeted and personal). Goodest good boy, with a heart a dozen sizes too big for his own good and too precious for this world.

All the people I ship romantically with this character: Miyako, his wife, obviously. And Lisa Yadomaru... sometimes both at once.

My non-romantic OTP for this character: Ukitake (Hi Work dad!) and Ichigo (Big bro mode activated).

My unpopular opinion about this character: Why, of all things, did his possessed corpse have to go out on that note? What did he do to deserve that desecration? I understand the thematic importance of Aaroniero's fight with Rukia and finally unburdening herself of that guilt, but Rukia couldn't have collected the remnants of Nejibana later and laid them to rest in Soul Society, where they could truly rest in peace? Why was the last vestige of his soul allowed to languish and rot in the den of cannibalistic monsters?

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: Kind of two variants of the above; 1) Rukia retrieves Nejibana's broken remnants and returns it to the Shiba family so they can lay it to rest. 2) Rukia rescues Kaien from Aaronerio's clutches and helps this broken lost soul try and find a new place in the world that's moved on without him, as a magnificent role reversal to how they met. (also standing headcanon that he Maes Hughes' the crap out of Aizen's schemes and was killed to cover it up)

Ukitake:

How I feel about this character: Tragic wasted potential seems to be a theme with the 13th. I liked Ukitake as a character and one of the few authority figures Ichigo actually liked and respected in the other world. He's chronically ill but managed to gain captaincy and hold it for many years, even close to retiring a little before Bleach started had fate going a little differently.

All the people I ship romantically with this character: None, really. Him x peaceful retirement?

My non-romantic OTP for this character: Kyoraku (brother from another mother), Kaien (Hi Son, are you winning?) and Rukia (go, my child. Do crime~!)

My unpopular opinion about this character: Making him host to a Soul King fragment was a mistake. It was stupid. I know many characters were struggling to find relevance in the last arc, but like with many others I could mention; killing off one of the most powerful players for the sake of drama was absolutely ridiculous. Especially with his Zanpakutou power. Its literally the most ideal counter to the Quincy, right up there with the Visoreds.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: That Ukitake actually had a proper battle and cured his illness. Following the above of removing the SK possession rubbish: We've seen in Soul Society that technology is actually quite backwards if its not military application. Maybe as part of their growing understanding and progressive change for the better, at some point, either they or Uryu poits out the human world has diseases similar to the one Ukitake suffers. Not only that, but they've a name for it and developed treatments and cures too. Imagine how reinvigorating that second lease on life would be. I'd still have Ukitake's lung weakened, permanently damaged from centuries of illness, but it gives him a chance to function as a front line commander.

[glacierheart]

you were born, bluer than a butterfly. beautiful & so deprived of oxygen, colder than your father's eyes. ❄

you were born, reachin' for your mother's hands ... VICTIM of your father's plans to RULE the world. too afraid to step outside, paranoid & petrified what you've heard.

THE TALE OF THE HEIR OF JACK FROST . son of the ice king . an original character crafted from the son to a villainous jack frost & a concoction of a summer personification heroine for a mother (aestas) to create an elaborate story of choosing between good and evil, being the embodiment of both sides of the moral alignments. a character born with bad and GOOD ingredients.

delving into how a potential villain becomes an ANTI-HERO. themes of chasing for a controlling father's approval, child neglect, trust issues and abandonment issues. stepping outside of his mother's good will & turning down a dark path (before getting back onto the good one). teetering on the fine line side of wrong and right. the savior or the villain? feeling a void from a broken heart and a cold childhood. needing a reason to be good. icy eyes, warm heart. living behind a facade. pretends to not care, but deep down .. cares a lot. protective. a prankster, morbid humor, sarcastic and witty. emotional and unpredictable.

based in the world of : DC, DISNEY / DISNEY'S DESCENDANTS, THE HUNGER GAMES, STRANGER THINGS, WEDNESDAY AND A MODERN WORLD VERSE.

name origin: caspian theros frost. caspian, meaning, 'white' like snow. and theros meaning an old greek name of 'summer' & his last name frost– after his father jack frost. his name is a combination of winter and summer, just like his parents.

memes. / open starters. / verses are under cut. / rules are under cut.

rules.

01. mun is 21+.

02. i am not based in just one verse, so pls– if you're not into the disney, thg, st, wednesday or dc/marvel world(s) then keep in mind i do have a normal modern world verse setting!

03. be mindful of triggering themes such as blood, death, drowning or child abuse on this blog. caspian was grown up with a very toxic, abusive father– so it'll be difficult to avoid mentioning these themes at times.

04. i am super welcoming of other oc characters and canon characters, i love them all.

05. i love different fandoms and crossovers, so do not hesitate to write with me if you apart of fandoms i may have not even mentioned on this blog yet.

06. if you follow me, pls feel free to reply to any of my opens or send in memes at any time! there's no expiration dates on those. if you're the type that loves to plot, then def come to my IMs but keep in mind i'm not the best at plotting until i get an idea flowing.. so coming to my IMs with an idea already in mind is your best bet if you'd rather plot !! <3

07. i ship with chemistry so no force shipping or godmodding, pls. <3

verses.

disney / disney descendants verse. the lost winter prince. caspian frost is the son to mother summer & father winter that are apart of their own separate seasonal kingdoms in auradon. when a combination of a warm hearted young woman and an ill-tempered, glacier hearted man wed and share a child they get both of their natures intertwined. the ice king had a skill for perfect persuasion– so charming and manipulative. he found grand interest the mother of warmth, aestas or as she liked to be called florence. the queen of summer is adorned with nothing but radiant waves, a symbol of abundance and prosperity. her presence heralds the arrival of the season of warmth, light, and growth. aestas is revered for her power to bring forth the earth's bounty, nurturing the land and its inhabitants with her life-giving energy. as the embodiment of summer, aestas represents the joyful and vibrant spirit of the season, inviting all to bask in the warmth of the sun's embrace. so what did father frost want, with a woman the complete opposite of himself? to destruct all of that, use florence as his greatest challenge to glaze over her summery heart, turn her on his side of all things glacier and then make her the queen of the winter kingdom. the ice king became very charming on his ploy to wrap himself around mother summer's heart. perhaps, kind deeds and months worth of finding out jack frost's romanticizing side had created a soft spot in her heart. perhaps, a warm spot... had melted a small hole in his frozen heart itself whether he wanted to remain in denial of that or not. perhaps, that's what fueled his anger all the more in the end. he promised to wed her, have the child she always wished for, jack frost was certain he had the queen of summer delicately wrapped around his icy finger. but when she wouldn't join him and his winter kingdom after understanding his scheme all along, to get her to join forces with him, he took it bitterly and hatefully because in his mind... he really thought she wouldn't 'betray' him then froze her over when she least expected it. caspian was a newborn and never learned the true events of what happened to his mother all from his father's manipulations and lies he fed the young frost. how his mother had abandoned them both and ran off with a new family because he simply wasn't good enough. his father took him under his wing and tried to mold caspian as his last option to being the future ruler of the winter kingdom one day. the ice king is equally as a controlling father as he is a ruler and eventually into caspian's teen years... he begins to find that out the more caspian strays off his father's plan and path of destruction the more he pries into how his mother was like the more demanding his father becomes. and the day he finds out how she really died, is the day the winter kingdom brews an ugly storm and a terrible argument between father winter and his child of winter that unfortunately held the eerily identical anger in his eye as his mother summer had the day she wished to 'betray' him. caspian's only choice left was to flee in fear he would kill him too... during that journey he ends up on the ISLE OF THE LOST. in this verse, caspian does possess a few powers as both of his parents have them. (all inheriting from his father, however.) he can create tiny snowflakes from the tips of his fingers. he has a special white rose that could be used for bad or for good, one touch of it and he can either create beautiful icy rose sculptures – or one drop – and freeze over endless acres of land. he posesses cryokinesis: ability to control temperature and moisture in the environment, which he can generate ice and cold. however, he doesn't have total control on his abilities and his volatile emotions of sadness and a lot of anger have a lot to do with how well he can control them.

the hunger games verse. the president's son: the hunger games. going entirely au for this by sort of reinventing the snow's with the frost's. the difference is unlike coriolanus, caspian has a long run battling between doing the right or wrong thing and inevitably chooses the right decision to scheme a plan to end the hunger games since the other difference is he's the presidents son. son of president frost. but – until then, his morals can come across skeptical. it's easy to assume what he may be like if going anything by his dictator father (which caspian despises). is he a bad person like mr. frost or has he taken a good streak after his late mother? getting accused, categorized in with his father, looked at as the next monster in line... sometimes makes him have difficulty believing he's any thing less. that's something that can certainly get in the way of trying to be a good person. especially with the brainwashing's of his father to topple on top of that. but there's a secret to still be unrevealed, something happened a long time ago when his mother tried to make a good impact on his father and out of anger of his mother's attempt to turn him good... he found a way to rid of her. all these year's caspian's believed a rebel is the one who did it but the day he finds out it was his father all along; things drastically change among that newfound betrayal.

wednesday verse. (to be written) ..

stranger things verse. (to be written) probably will be a test subject type thing, if i don't change my mind.

dc & marvel verse. anti hero. for this verse i may base him off delores winters son. but this is also to be decided and written!

modern verse 1. the president's son: modern day. in modern day setting, caspian winters lives an unordinary life as the son to the united state's president mr. jack winters. his entire life he's been shoved into politics, even if his mother, the kinder parent– has gave the best of her ability to allow him to live as a normal child. still, growing up with zero siblings and a small group of friends has created this loneliness inside of him he wishes he didn't have. sometimes he yearns for an escape from all of it all while the pressure to be next in line to take the throne is shoved down his throat.

modern verse 2. the mayor's son: modern day. this modern verse allows me to write caspian in more of a normal setting. his father's still able to be some kind of man in power, but he's allowed to live more typically and hide in the shadows better. attending university in his home city of chicago, in a band on the side, keeping up with his love for theatre. caspian's definitely always been that theatre kid. it's the only healthy thing other than his band in his life that keeps him out of his usual trouble he tends to find himself causing or in the middle of. he has a rebellious attitude, that tends to lead him there a lot. always caught on either side of right and wrong with zero positive role models in his life.

[lya-dustin]

Someone will remember us

Chapter 86

Cw: mentions of violence, death , the usual

Taglist: @stargaryenx @mercedesdecorazon @aemondx @darylandbethfanforever9

Gif by @ashley-jones

“The Citadel names the clash that followed the Battle of the Kingsroad. The men who fought it named it the Muddy Mess. By any name, the last battle of the Dance of the Dragons would prove to be a one-sided affair.”

---The Dying of the Dragons: The Short, Sad Reign of Aegon II

While Vermithor would never replace Vhagar in his heart, Aemond had to admit the Bronze Fury flew like a dream.

Despite the rain, both dragon and rider managed to cut through Baratheon's ranks like butter.

Well, what was left of it anyway.

The Archers led by Black Aly decimated the horses and killed half the riders, those who managed to arrive near the shield wall were killed by Bloody Ben’s men.

Those who managed to escape the ensuing rout were met by a dragon hungry for violence.

“Mercy, King Aemond!” Baratheon’s remaining men cry when he dismounts after.

Baratheon is not dead yet, despite his injuries the bastard is alive enough to be brought forth to Aemond and Aemma who had come like a silver goddess on her silver mount to put the fear of the gods in those who surrender.

They fall to their knees for them, more for her because they remember Aemma as the merciful princess who shares Baratheon’s blood.

“Yield, my lord.” She asks gesturing for the Maesters to treat the injured.

The man refused to be treated, but the Maesters do so anyways going as far as removing his dented armor.

But he won’t yield, not when he knows he’s too far deep to get away with it. Had he not sided with Aegon to give Cass a crown, perhaps he could simply yield with minor repercussions.

“I’d sooner dance in hell than wear your chains.” The man said with a curse before taking his own dagger and plunging it into his stomach.

Seven days later, his second son, Olyvar Baratheon, is born.

Had the man had more sense, he would have lived to meet him.

A shame so many had to die for this.

“They say he claimed Vermithor. They call him Jaehaerys Reborn.”

Every word and raven that comes after the Battle of the Kingsroad makes Corlys laugh like a madman.

Aegon would go against his own brother, the person he had believed would put him over his own wife.

By New Year’s Day, the rightful queen will sit on the Iron Throne and all this will end.

Word had come saying the last of his allies had changed their allegiance.

Lady Lannister would give her fealty in exchange for calling off Dalton Greyjoy, Lady Tyrell had her men take the remaining Hightowers into custody, Ser Tyland Lannister, Ser Marston Waters and Ser Julian Wormwood had all been captured by loyalists before they even left the bay.

Corlys did not need to bend the knee.

“Rhaenys, my love, just let me live long enough to see Laenor’s girl take what was meant to be yours.” Corlys prays to the only one being he ever had absolute faith in, his late wife.

It would not be long now, Corlys can feel the coldness of the Stranger in his bones. Either he will lose his head or whatever illness has taken root inside him will have him be burned with his ship.

He only asks that his remaining grandchildren get to be at peace when they have him join their parents and grandmother in the afterlife.

It is not much, but the Gods have never been generous anyways.

Aemma knows that by this time tomorrow, it will be finally over.

It had stopped raining by the time they reached Hayford.

They are given the Lord’s rooms because Hayford’s only remaining family are a maiden aunt, a babe sharing a nursery with his three-year-old sister, Lyra, the heiress of Hayford.

“Tomorrow, I will fuck you so hard you will limp on your way to the throne.” Aemond gives a hoarse laugh. “Gods, I miss our bed.”

“I would rather sleep on the floor than sleep in Aegon’s bed.” Aemma said and added, “Remind me to have his shit burned when we get there.”

It’s over tomorrow with the dawn they fly into the city and finish it.

Tomorrow they will arrest Aegon or kill him.

Aemma doesn’t know why that is enough to have her roll out of the bed and spill this evening’s supper into the chamber pot.

“Another dream, love?” Aemond asks, brow creased with worry as he helped her back to bed.

“I think I may be with child again.” she answered shaking her head. “I wager it’s a girl.”

And sure enough, the Maester can confirm her pregnancy with a sample of her urine and some wine.

Man fancied himself a pisse prophet, claims to know how to read piss and congratulated them on another son.

Seven moons later the good maester will apologize for his mistake when Princess Aenya, or Aennie for short, is born.

Aenya who will bring Dorne into the Realms with the only blood being that of her maidenhead by marrying Prince Morgan Nymeros Martell, son of Aliandra Nymeros Martell.

But that is still too long in the future and these dreams Aemma has are quickly forgotten the next morning.

“Do you think he will surrender?” she asks Aemond who tightened the chains on her saddle with enough wiggle room for her to jump should she have to.

“There is only one way to find out.” His hands shakes and had he not been wearing gauntlets, she would have taken them in hers and kissed them in assurance.

When they fly into Kingslanding, there are no cheers like before.

There are frightened screams drowning out those who cheer for them.

They cry for mercy thinking she will burn them to the ground.

But they did not attack them, so that was a good omen.

They land in the courtyard, where Jaehaerys and Alysanne once did with these same dragons.

Larys Strong comes to them, bows as best as he can and reveals a dead Aegon whose face had turned purple from poison.

“And so, it ends.” Aemond whispers, trying not to look at his brother’s corpse with pity.

He has her grandfather who is not too bad from his stint in the black cells with a circlet once worn by Queen Rhaenys, then her good daughter, Queen Alyssa, and would have been worn by her daughter, Jocelyn Baratheon, when Prince Aemon ascended the Iron Throne.

A Valyrian steel circlet with seven rubies that matched Aegon the Conqueror’s Crown and had been returned by Princess Deria of Dorne on the orders of her father.

A simpler thing than that of Alysanne and Aemma Arryn and Alicent Hightower.

And a different legacy as well.

“The King is dead, Long Live the Queen.”

With those words, the Dance of the Dragons ends.

----

Next up: the epilogue

[justsomeoneunordinary]

Kakashi for this one? 👀

https ://at .tumblr .com /justsomeoneunordinary/send-me-a-character-and-ill-answer-these/vjolyf8nlo70

1: sexuality headcanon

that man is SO aroace, hands down. that doesn't even need an explanation, just look at him!

unless he's being railed by gai, in which case he isn't quite so ace anymore uwu

2: otp

kakagai kakagai kakagai kakagai kaKAGAI KAKAGAI-

3: brotp

in my heart, he and tenzou are brothers. he totally behaves like an older brother around him, esp when he's being a little shit lol, i just love their relationship so much

4: notp

never liked kakairu and never will. also used to be open for obikaka but i cannot see it anymore tbh. makes me sick nowadays. (but the naruto fandom def has a problem with tagging their ships properly bc i keep seeing so many notps all the time argh) honestly, i don't rlly ship kks with anyone except with gai. i find him very unshippable idk....

5: first headcanon that pops into my head

he's a biter. not the fanon hatake = wolves hc kinda biting bc i hate that hc (kishi didn't give us much but he gave us enough to conclude that hatake = farmers, not wolves or nomads ffs do ppl not at least google the names before they come up with hc's or what), but the as a child he used to bite anyone kinda thing, so his father gave him a mask and kks just never stopped wearing it. he still bites as soon as it comes off

6: favorite line from this character

i am terrible at rmbr'ing lines but when he meets team 7 and his reaction is "my first impression of you is... i hate you all" is the fucking funniest shit to me. first, he lets those 12yo kiddos wait for hours and then has the gall to tell them he hates them lmfao king shit i love him (also, what a lying liar. they're his kiddos and he loves them)

7: one way in which I relate to this character

slouch king <3 i too, can't walk or sit with my back straight. also, reading porn in public. relatable

8: thing that gives me second hand embarrassment about this character

lmao in shippuuden where he had to read a section out loud of his porn book and the line was literally just "i love you" but he practically died trying to say it, face red, sweat running down, stuttering and all that jazz acbsjfhsjfhdjfbajfb IT'S LITERALLY JUST I LOVE YOU, IT'S NOT EVEN SMTH SMUTTY FFS KKS YOU'RE A GROWN MAN!!! also the sheer amount of times he collapses bc of chakra exhaustion like pls king that's not normal, no one else pushes their chakra to the limit you fucking drama queen. i'll never forget that one time sakura sees him at ichiraku's and goes "oh, not in the hospital for once? that's new" lmfaooooo get recc'd. ALSO kks of the sharingan has copied over a thousand jutsu AND YET WE ONLY EVER SEE HIM USE CHIDORI!! BRUH WHERE ARE THOSE 1000 JUTSU, WHERE???!!! how abt you stop using that sharingan of yours that drains you so much of chakra just to copy jutsu that you then don't even intend to use, hmmmmm??? lmao he's a genuis but he's so dumb

9: cinnamon roll or problematic fave?

neither? all village ninja's are basically the military of a fascist state, and all deserted ninjas are killers without actual permission to kill, so given the universe everyone is problematic. you could say bc he's one of the good guys he's the former but he's also such a loyal bootlicker (i love him but god kks the way he doesn't question the system at all even after everything that happened to him is so... acbjshdjsfh) so you could say he's problematic in that sense??? you can't rlly put any nart character into either of this category tbh