#ilarual tag

[shallowrambles]

Oh. This person @ilarual put it a lot better than I ever could.

#I am so tired of fanon a) stripping Cas of all agency and emotional intelligence and b) acting like 100% of his issues are bc of Dean#sorry but he was a whole person in his own right and had a whole life (RAISED BY A LITERAL EXTREMIST DOOMSDAY CULT????)#long before Dean and Sam came into his life#Cas absolutely 100% gets it entirely the second Dean explains to him exactly what was happening#moreover I swear people act like it's a given that Dean just marched Cas straight to the door#with nothing but a hoodie and that microwave burrito to his name#but sorry I just don't buy it#we never see anything that clarifies one way or another but what's in character for Dean#is to give him all the cash he has on him and three changes of clothes and all the fake IDs Dean made for him in 2009#and drive him to the bus station with really vague instructions to lay low for awhile until things cool off#which Cas interprets as ''please go to the other side of the continental divide'' instead of ''go three towns over where I can get to you''#because Cas has a lot of issues that have nothing to do with Dean so of course he would interpret it that way#anyway point is as painful as Cas getting kicked out of the bunker is for the viewer#I think it's honestly worse for the audience in the long run bc I really agree that the second Cas understands what's actually happening#and not really have any hangups about it#there's definitely some shit in their history Dean and Cas really need to talk about and work through as a couple bc it didn't get resolved#but this particular issue doesn't strike me as one of them#spn

Yeah, I agree that the audience holds a grudge and gives more weight to this event than it actually has. You could say that us hyperfixated, systemizing fans toxically keep score in their relationship way more than they do, hehe.

And I like your take on what Dean probably actually does here.

////

And yes! Cas gets a whole lot more than people give him credit for. His emotional intuition is much stronger than his social non-understanding of a completely alien human culture. There are times when Cas reads more "lost in translation" than hopelessly lost duck. IMHO. I'll add this bit as another later example of Cas being emotionally on the money (14x09):

Hot takes: Cas completely understands why he couldn't stay in the Bunker and he holds no real grudge about it. He actually understands and grasps the entirety of the between-a-rock-and-a-hard-place situation the angelic imposter put them in. He even gets it INSTANTLY upon being told about it. Because in canon, Cas actually has functioning emotional intelligence, even if some corners of fanon want to deprive him of it. If anything, he's ashamed of his angelic family for being manipulative and brutish...again.

Futhermore, Cas's tendency to rely on himself is a Cas thing (often, he waits till shit hits the fan to go for help). It's as much about his wartime situations as it is his upbringing. It's not JUST the tragic fallout of having different ideas about battle tactics than his human fam. It's also about having no parent in his life. (More on Cas psychology as it pertains to Chuck and Cas here.)

Anyway, Cas may have grudges and anger, but the being kicked out of the bunker thing...just isn't one of them!

And #2: If Cas had stayed in the bunker, Gadreel would've totally found a way to disappear him, and Dean isn't stupid enough NOT to see that.

And #3: We don't really know HOW much support was provided to Cas, or how much Cas refused. Cas has been shown handling public transportation since he cut off the finger of Pestilence, and I wouldn't put it past him to stubbornly hitchhike outta dodge after the rejection. I also wouldn't be surprised if he mishandled his money, and I wouldn't put it past him to stubbornly refuse help, either. Stoically shunning help until it gets really bad is a Cas thing.

[angelsdean]

ruthlessly deleting old 2021/2022 posts (not by me) from my dean studies tag like *click* un-incorporating that from my beliefs system! also the way SO many posts have me like ok uh-huh good aaand then say one completely wrong thing that loses me. it's so many posts.

[happilyfeatherafter]

Happilyfeatherafter's ficrec Fridays

In an effort to actually post on my own blog and not just tag rant I'm going to try and start doing what makes me happy - shouting about the fic I've read and loved recently! ETA: thank you @bloodydeanwinchester for the inspiration and impetus to share recs last week!

So introducing my ficrec Fridays.

5 January 2024 ficrecs

Beggars Would Ride by tiamatv was recommended to me by @ilarual and I am so glad I dived in on their suggestion. Combining two of my great loves, destiel and disney's Aladdin, this AU fic has an absolutely gorgeous depiction of a genie Castiel, in all his trueform splendour! Tia does an incredible job interweaving the two stories, with street rat Dean doing what he must to support his brother and his community, and maybe just maybe finding love and freeing a genie in doing so.

Everlasting by @entropic-saudade (art by @golby-moon) is a recent fic from the stabfest bang, featuring a grieving post-15x18 Dean, and a still adjusting to having Kaia back Claire. It also beautifully examines the parallels between Dean and Claire, and their joint tendency for flirting with people by comparing scars. Achingly romantic, Dean is looking for a way to bring Cas back, and Claire is seeking a momento of Kaia to keep close to her forever...and what's love without a little stabbing?

As A Friend by imogenbynight (@thevioletcaptain) is absolutely best summed up by it's own summary: In which Dean accidentally learns about Castiel's porn preferences, and one thing leads to another. With one last chapter pending, this fic is a smutty delight, in which a newly human Cas in a post-Chuck defeated world and a still adjusting Dean learn a thing or two about each other and decide the best thing to do is lean into it with a secret no strings friends with benefits kink exploration set up...what could possibly go wrong?

doors unlocked and open by sidewinder (@hawkland, art by @fluffsnake) brilliantly combines The Winchesters finale with a post-canon continuation, in which Cas has become the new ruler and embodiment of the Empty whilst Jack is busy restructuring heaven. But Dean is not finding peace, not even in Jack’s improved afterlife, and has instead been traversing the Axis Mundi in the search of his family...in search of Castiel. But there might be a new fate to await them.

tie your wrists with leather by kalmialatifolia is a short but sweet post-canon D/S kinktober fic, in which Cas gets Dean spread eagle in leather cuffs leading to this exchange which captures their voices so perfectly:

“Jesus, Cas,” is all Dean says, and then, as Castiel crawls between his spread legs, “They—they smell good. They smell…” He laughs a little, a soft huff. “Like the Impala? Kind of?”

Castiel snorts, putting his hands on the backs of Dean’s knees and spreading his legs just a little farther apart. Dean goes easy. “Yes,” he says dryly, “I thought you might like that.”

and if that wets your appetite for a longer form wip, then reclusive secret romance novelist Dean and Priest with a past Cas are getting up to all sorts in their fic Benedictions.

[cassierobinsons]

@ilarual YOUR TAGS ON THIS POST ARE SO REALLLL I had to make a separate post about it

cas canonically does not angst about liking men. liking one man in particular yeah, but not about being gay in general. in an AU though? he literally comes from a fundamentalist xtian """community""" (cult) that has a disproportionate level of power over the lives of the general public. everyone in the cult is a huge narc, including himself. one of the only trustworthy people is his big sister who ran away and went no contact years ago. His mother is a CONVERSION THERAPIST who, let’s be real, probably isn't great about the autism either. too. i don’t get people who think cas’ backstory is impossible or even difficult to adapt to a mundane setting because the parallels are blatant and everything hints towards cas being deeply closeted.

I mean fuck, remember how balthazar was like “wow i’m so glad i rebelled and get to do whatever i want now including have obscene amounts of gay sex” and s6 cas was like :O you're using your freedom for HEDONISM? instead of SERVING THE CAUSE??? meanwhile he had spent the last year watching dean rake leaves in dead silence. and that's a cas whose family were only homophobic in the metaphorical and not literal sense. AU cas is not going to figure out that he's gay without a real fight!

[shallowseeker]

Oh yes, that’s way more succinct @ilarual Fringes of society indeed. Yes to Mary chasing safety & security but through a different route than Sam, perhaps due to having more emotionally stable parents in the face of the Hunting Horrors?

///

Also, not to minimize Sam’s Azazel destiny, but in terms of the family structure, Sam seems like a spare. Dean was the true heir to familial responsibilities. Because Dean upheld these outrageous Atlas-like expectations, it had the effect of affording Sam slightly more stability/security/mobility.

Jack too is an heir. He’s got Heaven and hunting responsibilities combined. 💔

Less and more? Another way Sam and Jack are fundamentally different re: their emotional interiority

I'm not able to put this into perfect words tonight, and this runs the risk of oversimplifying Sam, but here goes...

I feel like Sam, for a great portion of his story, longs to Be More, or at least, to give the appearance of Being More.

Sam tells people he's working on his Ph.D. Sam got into Harvard. Sam tells people he was in law school when he was simply "pre-law." Sam wanted to Be Normal, not for simplicity's sake, but perhaps for the holy grail of Making It. (Whatever Making It means in America.)

Intellectualism is important to Sam. Sam's fantasies take place in libraries. Sam likes being a legacy. Sam is smart, and he wants you to see him as smart. (Dean and Cas are craftier; they're more okay with being underestimated because it allows them to cunningly get the upper hand. Crucially, they recognize this about each other's intelligence, too.)

At his core, Sam isn't a "boy-king," not really. He was styled as boy-king in order to be served up on a platter to the True King (Lucifer) to use to win a war. It was a class gambit--a fancy title to get Sam to submit his body for the profit of the war machine.

///

Jack, on the other hand, is the real deal. Jack is a "young prince." He's the "Bambi" to Cas's stern "Great Prince of the Forest."

Jack isn't borrowing powers or accidentally siphoning them off from a yellow-eyed demon. His powers are his own. Even when he uses powers "beyond himself," they derive from his own soul. This fundamental difference in his nature makes Jack something of an off-key parallel to Sam. (He, of course, does parallel Sam when he's eating angel hearts, just as he parallels Cas’s Godstiel appetite re:Purgatory souls.)

But on the whole, Jack wants to be Less. He longs for simplicity in the same way that Dean does. In the same way that Mary does. Sure, Jack wants to Be Good and Do Good, same as Sam does (they are both Doomed Children, after all). But he also wants powers and strength in the same way that Cas and Dean do; that is, primarily to protect everyone.

Jack doesn't appear to have the same status drive that Sam did as a young man.

And for that matter, neither does Mary. Like Sam, she wants a normal life in order to feel safe and secure, but she lacks the drive to impress others by Being a Success.

[scoobydoodean]

"Dean has no time for fruitless quests to find God. He's got people to protect" | 1.03 "Dead In The Water

Quote is tags from @ilarual ♥️

[destieltropecollection]

DESTIEL TROPE COLLECTION 2023 | DAY 17 | Friends to Lovers

Touch Me, Sit With Me, Tell Me To Stay | @aaronthe8thdemon

Rating: Teen & Up Word Count: 3,634 Main Tags/Warnings: Post-Season/Series 15, Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Castiel Out of the Empty (Supernatural), Grieving Dean Winchester, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, Angel Castiel (Supernatural) Summary: The day the car dies, Castiel thinks that he (and a great many humans, too) would give up so much to be loved half as well as Dean loves Baby.

Heartcatcher | Maetheheller (AO3)

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 4,975 Main Tags/Warnings: Nick Nelson from Heartstopper is a dean Winchester parallel, hand jobs, frottage, best friends to lovers, Charlie Dean Cas movie nights, The Boys references Summary: Charlie, Dean, and Cas have a Heartstopper “movie night” and Dean doesn’t expect to relate so much to Nick Nelson, or find the courage to confess his feelings to Cas, his blue-eyed best friend, but sometimes good things do happen.

aperture | ilarual (AO3)

Rating: General Word Count: 5,000 Main Tags/Warnings: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Friends To Lovers, It's Not Actually Unrequited They're Just Both Idiots, Oneshot Summary: Dean keeps a photo collage of all the people he loves. Castiel is barely in it.

when the stars align | @twinone1221

Rating: General Word Count: 20,550 Main Tags/Warnings: Camping AU, Mechanic!Dean Winchester, Teacher!Castiel, Car Trouble, Stargazing Summary: Camping was something Castiel’s family loved for different reasons. Amelia loved to cook over an open fire, Jimmy enjoyed hikes the most, his niece Claire preferred riding her bicycle, and his son Jack always asked for stories while stargazing. The plan was simple. Drive to the lake, spend some time with his family, eat some good food, sleep under the stars and then drive back in time for work on Monday morning. It was the perfect plan for a perfect weekend. Then his truck broke down.

Love As Blue And Rainbow Feathers | @aaronthe8thdemon

Rating: Mature Word Count: 37,388 Main Tags/Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Season/Series 13, Major Character Injury, Wingfic, Castiel Possessing Dean Winchester, Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, Light Angst, Fluff, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, Past Child Abuse, Internalized Homophobia, Canon-Typical Violence Summary: Narrowly escaping death in an alternate reality? Grievous injuries with only the most outrageous solutions available? Pranks as a form of flirting? Unresolved sexual tension driving everyone else nuts? Teaching a toddler how to fight an archangel and actually stand a chance of winning? Juggling a bunker of refugees and the problems in Heaven and the threat of the devil himself? Only on any day ending in Y for the Winchesters.

The barista and the bookshop | @abi-cosmos

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 55,794 Main Tags/Warnings: Coffeeshop AU, Mutual pining, Bisexual Dean Winchester, Gay Castiel, Top Castiel/Bottom Dean Winchester, Friends to lovers, Slow burn, Angst with a happy ending Summary: In a sleepy mountain town, stitched together with fairy lights, Dean Winchester has been running Squirrel and Moose Coffeehouse since his Dad died. Next door, anchored by family obligation, librarian Castiel has been tasked with taking over Chuck’s Bookshop. Wanting a distraction after his brother leaves town, Dean offers to help Castiel fix it up. It’s a job, something to get his hands on, it doesn’t matter that the librarian is hot and kinda weird. Castiel doesn’t understand why Dean is helping him, but he’s happy that he is, and their friendship grows until he can’t deny what’s right in front of him. But when their time together is cut short, both face a decision they aren't ready for. In a sleepy mountain town, stitched together with fairy lights, what's it gonna be? Peace or freedom?

The guy next door | @castielific

Rating: Explicit Word Count: 61,653 Main Tags/Warnings: AU!Neighbors, AU!NoSupernatural, Dean Smith, baby!jack, TheEnd!Cas, minor Cas/OC, Dean has a sexual identity crisis, single parent!Cas, miscommunication, self esteem issues, emotional constipation, angst with a happy ending, pining, friends with benefits Summary: When Dean Smith quit his job at Sandover, he had no idea what he was going to do with his life. He definitely didn't plan for his hippie neighbor and his four years old kid to make him question everything he thought he knew about himself.

[spngeorg]

Episode 147 - 7.21 Reading is Fundamental

KEVIN! This poor kid... just add him to the list of Terrible Things Chuck Did.

We have a Leviathan Tablet and a new prophet to read it, which wakes Cas into a state of abject denial and depression of what he did, brings the angels back into play, and sets Sam and Dean on a big scavenger hunt for parts for a weapon powerful enough to end the leviathans.

Also, bees.

I think that about sums it up... oh and there's a lot of suffering of the personal emotional kind for everyone! Wheeee! Thanks, Ben Edlund!

LINKS!

The Superwiki page

My tag

Chuck is a real jerk

A reminder of why I don’t give too much credence to heaven/angel hierarchy 

Rewatch notes and general yelling from October 2019

Thoughts on bees and honey on a very very old post

Cas and games and bees by ladyofthesilent

A more recent post by ilarual about the bees and guilt

A post from s13 that covers how I see the tablets and their power

Rewatch notes from January 2018 (focusing on the thread of being sorry and playing sorry connecting back to 4.22)

Lizbob’s Dean and Cas are In Love series (part 1) (part 2) (part 3) (part 4)

Also, reminder that all my notes are on ao3 now! this week's notes can be found right here.

Listen now on Spotify, or wherever you enjoy podcasts!

[unreconstructedfangirl]

tagged by @kvothes ❤️ . Thank you! I think you're awesome! Hope it's not weird! 🙏🏻

list five things you never get tired of writing. it can be tropes, themes, characters, phrases, whatever brings you joy. then tag five people! In no particular order.

Long-winded exegesis all about why Dean Winchester is queer in a canonical and text-based, intentional, and bleedingly obvious way.

Poems like paroxysms about this one friend of mine who is magnificent and deeply beloved. Let me count the ways. Again and again and again.

Poems about mythological and fairy tale crones. Dear crones, I am obsessed with u.

Handwritten letters in the style of Jane Austen to my best friend from college, who answers them in the voice of Jane Austen, and has done so for so many years. And who is a dude. Like. Way to be awesome, friend.

Endless expressions of my deep anxiety about the dangerous but unavoidable relationship between language, narrative and selving. In fairness, I am a little tired of it, but I can't stop.

Tagging some of my tumblr faves and dearests: @pleaseraisemefromperdition , @mythopoetry , @doctornerdington , @luckshiptoshore & @ilarual

Only if you want to, y'all.

[snorlaxlovesme]

three random facts about yourself!

tagged by the lovely @howlingmoonrise!

rules: if you get this, answer with three random facts about yourself and send it to the last seven blogs in your notifs! anon or not, doesn’t matter, let’s get to know the person behind the blog <3

i rarely if ever post about it on tumblr, but I am a giant Big Brother fan and have seen 24 out of the 26 seasons and watch Youtube videos and listen to podcasts about it constantly. i am also totally convinced i could win if i was ever on despite the fact that i would lose ever single competition

i cook for my family a lot and recently made a recipe that they dubbed "our new favorite way to eat chicken," which is ego boost except for the fact that it's just a recipe i stole from a Hello Fresh card I found at someone's house while i was at work lol

my favorite pokemon will obviously never change, but i feel like my second favorite fluctuates a lot throughout my life. right now it's Clodsire! :]

and i'll pass this on to @ilarual @supreme-sauteer @cthulhu-with-a-fez @redphlox @vin420 @drowsystarlight and @texasfave94!

play if you'd like!

[souporsaladnatural]

hihihi <3 been itching to follow more spn blog. would you be able to tag some of your faves <3

I GOT YOU

@/forestofsprites- gorgeous artwork that will have you scrolling back up bc you thought it was a screencap from the show

@/angelsdean- wonderful art AND great dean thoughts and analysis

@/purewasteland- gifs a lot of Jensen and Misha stuff from panels, support our troops o7

@/destielfandomlore- great collection of destiel evidence in and out of the show

@/lamiasage- beautiful art, the colors are to die for

@/ilarual- rly good cas centric thoughts and analysis

@/blanketforcas- super fun and silly meta amvs, status quo amv should be required reading I'm so serious

@/spnstillstudies- took on the INSANE task of redrawing a still from every episode of the show and they're all beautiful

@/scoobydoodean- fantastic show and dean centric analysis and vry funny. Also made a bunch of edits of dean with scooby doo plushes which are a gift to this world

@/castielsprostate- super pretty art and also THEE most wretched cursed text posts if you wish to be jumpscared on the dash

@butch--dean- absolutely incredible amvs

and so many more!!!!!!!

[dreamalottie]

15 Questions + 15 Friends

Thanks for the tag @shinraalpha 💜

Are you named after anyone?

A little bit Brontë, a little bit my great-grandmother.

When was the last time you cried?

Friday, when I was feeling very lonely.

Do you have kids?

Don't have a partner and I would be an overstimulated, impatient mess, so no.

What sports do you play/have you played?

rollerskating! Been doing it for two years starting as a total beginner, and it's been wonderful for my mental health, doing something physical away from screens/not using my eyes too much, and meeting amazing new people totally unrelated to my dayjob. I also like swimming and badminton but tend to do it like once a year.

Do you use sarcasm?

No. Never. 😐

What is the first thing you notice about people?

Physically: if they've got a cool queercoded haircut, piercings/tattoos, or intriguing personal style. Personality wise: kindness, patience, good at listening to and making space for the quiet people in the room.

What's your eye color?

Hazel

Scary movies or happy endings?

yes. I like both, probably leaning a tiny bit more towards happy endings in what I watch and read more regularly, because I'm more a ghost/gothic person than a gore/bodyhorror person. And I love a love story *studies them like a bug*

Any talents?

I can stand backwards, I write a little, good at remember obscure facts about tv shows and finding links to sources for trivia online to back up my facts.

Where were you born?

the town over from where I grew up in south east England.

What are your hobbies?

Collecting books, trying to find time to read said books, talking about books to my friends. Watching the same show over and over and over and over whilst making lists of other shows I'd quite like to watch. Going to the theatre!! LOVE the theatre. Please come to the theatre with me. Collecting new queer artists/museums/music/markets.

Do you have any pets

Yes, my little tortoiseshell cat, she's currently curled up snoozing against my leg.

How tall are you?

i am 5ft 7in with bad posture.

Favorite subject in school?

I was best at English, loved writing and reading and analysing stories and the lateral thinking of it all. But LOVED drama and media studies. ...I was not good at much else and now realise that was likely adhd/autism/burnout.

Dream job?

I want to own a queer bookshop specialising in fiction for young people, and have a space for community activities.

Tagging?

@excitedrainbow @nonthepratt @plasticterrarium @hypermania @swordofsun @wigglebox @ilarual @profoundly-locked @luckshiptoshore @allthoseskeletons and anyone who wants to (and totally no pressure to do so if I tagged you!)

[mybrainproblems]

Thank you @slipper007 for the tag! (Loving the jacket in your post!)

Rules: Share three things you're excited for today!

The heatwave finally broke! Yes it's still gonna be toasty, but not brain melting hot!

My countertop dishwasher arrives today! Praise be!

My car should pass inspection today now that I have the replacement mirror!

Also I feel like it's a given but omg tomorrow is Saturday 👌👌👌👌

Tagging @swordofsun @ilarual @queermania @angelsdean @chrispineofficial @luckshiptoshore @runningwolf62

And if you follow me, consider yourself tagged :)

[shallowseeker]

Belated tag game from @payphoneangel & @hotgirleracas

Rules: Make a new post and post a bit from your WIP:

///

///

Secret adrenaline junkies Cas & Jack from For your crimes against the most high. I have been revising what I posted last year, adding additional chapters, and making chapter headers.

I'm very excited to share/re-share the things with y'all when the time comes. This is what I worked on last! I worked on the header for it last weekend (thought they're changed a bit since then ofc).

I'm tagging: @cuddlemonsterdean @ooyuhgetitig4 @gay-french-fry @ilarual @bogwitchatrois & @destiel-wings

[ao3feed-destiel-02]

a house is not a home

a house is not a home https://ift.tt/QiMWFU1 by ComradeCastiel (Ilarual) Dean is missing, and Cas and Sam are trying to cohabitate in the bunker. Cas can't say he's particularly enjoying the experience. Words: 1221, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English Series: Part 3 of Ficlet Fridays Fandoms: Supernatural (TV 2005) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: Gen, M/M Characters: Castiel (Supernatural), Sam Winchester Relationships: Castiel & Sam Winchester, Castiel/Dean Winchester Additional Tags: Post-Episode: s09e23 Do You Believe In Miracles? (Supernatural), Sam and Cas are not besties, POV Castiel (Supernatural), Pining Castiel (Supernatural), Oneshot via AO3 works tagged 'Castiel/Dean Winchester' https://ift.tt/I6vRCqL November 25, 2023 at 10:37PM

[deancasforcutie]

#prev tags -> #i mean #it's true #cas: ever since i made that deal i WoNdeReD WHaT iT cOuLD bE #wHaT mY tRuE HaPpiNesS would even look like #bruh did you never like... fantasize? #grade a repression #<- prev #literally he's so fucking repressed #and like all people who are vaguely aware that there's stuff We're Just Not Dealing With Right Now #he considers that shit a superpower #(he really shouldn't) #(I love him so much someone please give him a hug and some therapy) (via @ilarual)

remember when castiel made a death deal that hinged on him experiencing true happiness and he was like “they don’t know i know this hack: that will never happen”