#ii why are you so cool

[ruinme-please]

[sacchiri]

Hellsing 2002 calendar illustration.

Ein wunderliche und erschröckliche Hystori von einem großen Wüttrich genant Dracole wayda Der do so ganz unkristenliche marrter hat angelegt die mensche, als mit spissen als auch die leut zu Tod geslyffen

A wondrous and frightening story about a great berserk called Dracula the voivode who inflicted such unchristian tortures such as with stakes and also dragged people to death

[smile-files]

(my ii3 rewatch is going swell! i'm quite enjoying myself.)

it is sort of funny how nickel goes from blaming everything on balloon in ii2 to blaming everything on clover in ii3. he very much wants to contextualize his misfortune, wanting someone to get mad at (he doesn't like feeling in the wrong personally, and i doubt he'd like to think he's just unlucky); when he starts to get along with balloon in ii3, he needs another scapegoat, and clover's the perfect pick...

as i was saying, nickel seems to have some hidden guilt about treating balloon badly before, with his stubborn, heels-dug-in hatred of balloon fading away now that he doesn't have to save face in front of baseball and suitcase. of course, he wants to save face in front of balloon too, so he half-passes it off as box suggesting it (he always wants a passive lackey to help him push for what he really wants, huh?). nickel's caught in a limbo of not wanting to seem like he had a sudden heel-face turn/change of heart, but also wanting to express that he genuinely enjoys balloon's company (because he's actually letting himself do so now). he isn't being explicitly nice to balloon, but he's simultaneously secretive about the fact that he only did it because "box" told him to -- he doesn't want balloon to think his amicability is nothing more than obligatory, but he doesn't want to be vulnerable either. really interesting stuff.

in any event, nickel's friendlier with balloon now, so obviously balloon could no longer be his scapegoat. he still doesn't like feeling guilty for his own mistakes, nor does he enjoy his troubles being blameless, so he picks clover as his target: largely because he's cynical and can't cope with the idea of pure goodwill, happiness, and innocence which clover represents. she is everything that he isn't, but at the same time what he wants to be; he resents that. this cynicism about clover probably connects with his cynicism about balloon in ii2 -- he initially couldn't wrap his head around a manipulative person changing for the better. weirdly, he still hasn't completely gotten over balloon's heel-face turn as of now (he still doesn't believe in that kind of change, at least not fully), and yet he's still chummy with balloon. as far as i can tell, nickel is strongly projecting his own reservations onto balloon: that he himself can't change and be a good person.

[rose-chateau]

Ok this would get me eviscerated on reddit, but I'm sure the tumblr dragons dogma fandom is normal enough to hear me out on this.

Gamers expecting bg3 level sex scenes in any mature open world fantasy rpg with a romance mechanic is fucking weird, right?

Like YEAH, none of the reddit gamers played DD1, but wasn't "the campfire scene" like, REALLY poorly received and controversial? Even the first duchess quest was enough to put people off just on the basis of their Arisen being a girl or the duchess looking young or whatnot. And even when the game DIDN'T give you a vile landlord or a *child* in said fade-to-black sex scene, it was weird just having a random NPC be your "beloved" when literally everyone was more compelled by their main pawns and by The Fucking Dragon. Most ppl don't TALK about the beloved system in dragon's dogma the same way they talk about romanceable NPCs in dating sims, Dragon Age games, or even SKYRIM.

People in the DD trenches EARNED a video game with no sex scenes, frankly. Gamers quit complaining about the absence of bumping pixels and expensive VA moans challenge omg

[ojbrush]

Im not crazy

[skitskatdacat63]

Looking at the Austrian crown: 🥰😁😊😚😍

Drawing the Austrian crown: 😟☹️😥😢😰

Please someone save me, why did I do this to myself, look at this thing

[oh-meow-swirls]

was looking through old posts and i'm surprised to see that i seemingly didn't have any commentary on anything in 3 in chapter 7, 8 or 9, the posts related to 3's story go from "my first reaction when i saw yopple-bot was 'i love you. but also you are definitely the boss for this chapter-'" to "i have been in hell all day. hell being bada-bing tower." funny to me cuz those chapters are like, the best ones sdfkljsdfjfsdkjlfsdjkl-

[captain-amadeus]

"They placed so much pressure on Sofia to learn how to waltz" Roland isn't good at waltz either. he would not mind if Sofia sucked as much as him.

[adhdtsukasa]

everyday i grieve that it's pretty much unlikely for wxs to cover songs that are on the calm and slow side due to the theatrical group they are and it means that we'll never get an by deco*27 wxs cover. such a wasted potential. such a wasted opportunity

[dbphantom]

sorry for being a sinner but i subscribe to the 'egghead is sabaody 2' theory (<- just wants angst)

[widevibratobitch]

so turns out i had a pretty fucked up childhood??? insane. gotta love therapy

[malpractique]

special interests for me are sometimes infodump zone and sometimes it is i am going to think SO HARD about this FOREVER and keep rereading the wikipedia page until i have it damn near memorized

[smile-files]

hello fellow nickel hater btw bot for the character bingo

i love bot!! what a sweetie!!! i, like many, have gripes about testy and fan having made them - which, we can all admit, is rather silly - but in concept bot is so fascinating!!!!! i think the fandom has lots of good ideas for bot's origin... i should probably come up with one myself (which would probably in some way coincide with my idea of a meeple guy other than mephone hosting ii3). but yeah bot is nice. very cute :)

[floorpancakes]

as much as i dream of a perfect sciencesaru reboot of xxxholic (as long as they don't get too crazy w hima, I saw early devilman crybaby) i do think that ppl should stop avoiding janky 2000s low budget-looking anime for its looks cause 1. half my favourite shows are this and 2. it's funny. you all love goofy frames of your favs for funny memes and sillies right??? you all love a silly little joke right??? what if i told you there's EXCELLENT AND BEAUTIFUL AND AESTHETIC CHARACTERS with EXCELLENT WRITING and ARCS and you get to enjoy them both as really cool pretty fashion models AND as goofy silly fucking react images

[oncillabrigade]

Consider:

The Bats all have personalized ring tones for one another, but everyone has both a civilian and a Bat ring tone. The civilian ones are chaos, with everyone choosing whatever they want for their various family members and friends. BUT! Everyone has a single Bat tone that all other team members use for them.

The catch? Bruce forbid them from choosing their own Bat ring tones because he proposed this plan back in Dick's Robin days and he IMMEDIATELY picked "Toxic." The choice was not well received.

Bruce: Dick, I will not be alerted to the fact that you're in danger by some Britney Spears song.

Dick: First of all, it is not some Britney song, it is the Britney song. That song finally won her a Grammy.

Bruce: *sighs*

Dick: Second of all, it won't tell you when I'm in danger... it'll tell you when Robin is.

Bruce:

Bruce: I'm taking the Walkman out of the Robin kit.

Dick: *offended gasp*

(Yes, Dick is old enough for a Walkman. No, you will not change my mind. Yes, the Tim-and-on siblings all find that hilarious. Yes, Jason has to be VERY careful not to mention that he borrowed that Walkman for years because he was uncomfortable taking expensive electronics out and about with him.)

Anyway!

Dick then proposes a slew of other songs for the whole team to use, all of which are pop culture references, e.g. the Scrubs theme because they're not Superman and also they're a dysfunctional family of coworkers; the theme from the Godfather because "let's be honest, B, we are basically our own mafia"; "Where is My Mind" by the Pixies because lol identity shenanigans, etc. The list is endless. Bruce spends weeks groaning every time his son texts him.

Eventually, they compromise on the version of "The Entertainer" from The Sting because they're hiding in plain sight to enact a mission defending good people in a hard world. Bruce, Dick, and Alfred are all so pleased with this that they each take a different section of the song as their ring tone.

Then Barbara becomes Batgirl, so she gets a section... and then Jason becomes Robin and gets one, too... and then Tim, then Steph, and then Cass is taken in, and... uh oh. That's a lot of people for one song.

But it's family tradition! They can't stop now. That would be so unfair to the new kids, B!

So they start using alternate arrangements of the song. Bruce has mellowed slightly on the "no choosing your own" thing. As long as it's a version of "The Entertainer" (within reason) he'll allow it.

Tim retroactively changes his ring tone to a weird groove-ska arrangement Bart randomly sent him on YouTube because have you met Tim Drake? Of course he went for hilarious obscurity. (Bruce grits his teeth and approves it after lots of prompting from Dick and Alfred). Steph makes it her mission to find a weirder one (Bruce agrees because he's too tired to deal with accusations of favoritism).

Cass creates her own arrangement on theremin because apparently she knows how to play the theremin. No one is sure why. Upon inquiry, she just says, "spooky noises are fun," but does not elaborate further even when she's asked to do so. A Batgirl's gotta have her secrets—Babs taught her that.

When Jason starts working with his family again, he pays an aspiring music producer within Red Hood's ranks to create a minor key remix of the original Robin II ring tone. His siblings (minus Cass) are VERY jealous he has his own personalized arrangement. Dick, Tim, and Steph end up paying this goon who owns Garage Band to do ones for them, too. Duke does the same when he joins the team.

Meanwhile, in a fit of little brotherly pique, Damian steals Tim's original ring tone. He hopes to rub salt in the Robin replacement wounds. He fails! Tim finds it beyond funny that Damian's ring tone is groove-ska. So Damian quietly pays the amateur producer to make him one that's cooler than Tim's. He pays a ludicrous amount, though, because Steph paid for one cooler than Jason's and Tim paid for one cooler than Steph's.

(Dick wanted one cooler than Jason's too, but he had $63.02 in his bank account at the time and Bruce flat out refused to use the Batbudget on "a super cool ring tone that's better than Jay's." Eventually, Dick just paid himself for an averagely cool one. In installments.)

At this point, the Bats have single-handedly given this fledgling producer enough money to quit being a goon and start an indie music studio. His first customers are mostly superheroes from out of town who like what the Bats have going on and want their own team ring tones. Harley and Ivy get in on that action, too.

Then, as word spreads, every local crook/henchperson with a side band (there are many) flocks to the studio to have their stuff produced by one of their own. Gotham rogues suddenly have an unemployment problem, while the city finds itself with a flourishing indie music scene that puts Metropolis' to shame. The entire state of New Jersey is celebrating the dual victory.

Dick has never been so glad someone doesn't like Britney Spears' magnum opus.