#ihatemybf

[amoeganism]

DON'T LIE, I'M PERFECT AND YOU LOVE ME luka

Luka really wants to take a nap after a long day of being exploited and being a pain in the ass to every human around him, but your priorities (pissing him off) come first!

WC: ~600

Your boyfriend, visibly exhausted, miserably slumps his upper body onto his bed and his knees collapse. Bundled under mounds of thick blankets, you reach an arm out to ruffle Luka’s blond hair, brushing through his wavy locks and petting his head like a dog. You snicker at the sight of his face contorting after realizing what you’re doing, lazily swiping your hand away and grunting before coughing into his arm. 

It takes you a few moments to inch over to where Luka lays. You didn’t want to sacrifice the comfort of being suffocated and melting into your bed until you’re a pile of sweat and nasty mulch. His eyes slowly flutter shut and his breathing slows but the uncomfortable position he’s in acts as a barrier between him and falling into a deep sleep. However, it takes too much energy to try to pull Luka fully onto the mattress, but what doesn’t take much energy is disrupting the rest he needs. You aren’t planning on getting the title of “Number One Lover of a Superstar” and you hadn’t seen him the entire day since you both had woken up; you deserve this, you reason to yourself. 

Under your fingertips, you switch between prodding and poking his pale cheeks until they warm and bloom into a faint pink. Luka tries his best to make you stop, puffing his cheeks and intertwining your fingers together but you retaliate by grabbing his face and watching him deflate. It gives you a slight ego boost when he gives up and chooses to throw his lanky limbs over you, adding his heavy bodyweight over the mass of your blankets.

“How was your day of terrorizing the music industry?” you ask, immediately returning to pinching his cheeks. 

“I don’t need to terrorize anyone. Everyone already knows that I’m a fan favorite.”

“Yeah because I totally hallucinated you having at least ten different tabs about Mizi and you weren’t writing in a notebook titled ‘Evil and Devious Masterplan’. You’re embarrassing when you beef with people eight years younger than you.”

“God forbid a man has hobbies.”

“Yeah I really hate it. Stick to singing and looking cute. Only I deserve to see your evil. It makes me feel special when you aren’t exposing yourself to everyone.”

“You make it sound like I’m flashing the public.”

“You pretty much are. Your dick and bad personality are the same thing.”

“You’re so mean to me,” Luka whines in which you stick your tongue out at him in response. “I’m an innocent man who can do nothing bad. Ever. And here I am, being mistreated by the one who is supposed to love me until and beyond death. What did I do to deserve this?”

“Okay, okay, I’m sorry Luka,” you press a kiss to his sore, red cheek, letting your lips linger on his skin before hugging him tighter. At the same time, you ignore the fact that he is a thirty year old man throwing a minor tantrum over you having fun being insufferable the same way he does on a daily basis. “Anyways, can I bite your face? I have a really bad urge to do that right now. Actually, I don’t need your permission.”

“Hey! I have a show tomorrow, you know? My fans are going to be disappointed if I appear with teeth marks on my face. What will the public think—ow!”

“Hehe, you’re so cute like this.”

“At least bite the other side to even it out,” Luka sighs and turns his head. 

“I knew you loved me.”

[sh3sinp4rties]

“tight clothes are for sluts”

-a man too fat for compression shirts

[theres-a-body-here]

Kidnapped Darling!Reader, who once gets access to the internet, doesn't call for help but instead posts shit like this

[katakosmos]

we should all start treating evan rosier like a lab rat. we should hurt him, starve him, dissect him, amputate some part of his body and use him to the limits of the impossible. then kill him and call it an unsuccessful experiment.

[dylannnyon]

Parece que Reita no tiene plata

[akashirl]

[thankynext]

don’t test me

[iho6hi2]

light yagami is so pathetic I WANT TO CUT HIM IN HALF and eat him hannibal lecter style

[softghetto2012]

the way that I actually hate my bf

[jennymannysblog]

blocked him

[amoeganism]

imagine dating your blue lock boyfriend and you tell him you're having a bad day so he sends a selfie but it makes your day even worse

[serendipityufoundme]

these men are so boring i just HAVE to get another bf

[nenamustbehappy]

bf

bf doing internship interviews and i can hear him. we aint making it out the hood.

[immessingaround]

wanted to put this out here like ya IK i crave toxic relationships and ik im emotionally unavailable and ya ik i KINDA relate to the #ihatemybf vids on tt (sorry miranda lol) but someone love me like i want someone to want me😩😩😩ITS SO AGITATING IK I SUCK BUT IDK HOW TO GET BETTER

[katakosmos]

things i'd do to evan rosier (incomplete list):

kiss his forehead

eat his head in one big chomp

be the little spoon to his big spoon, even though i'm taller than him

stab him in the chest

bathe together in a tub full of foam

tie him to my bed

let him read me bedtime stories in french

blow him (up like a balloon and then free him into the sky until he deflates and flattens to the ground)

watch him get dressed

fold him over until his spine breaks in half and i can fit him into a suitcase

**** **** **** **** * ***

[roryheartz]

I love him to death but his current fashion sense is… questionable

My hayden fix for the morning

Happy thursday everyone😘🤗💕